#he actually has a middle name but that's on a need to know basis only ｡ﾟ(ﾟ∩´﹏`∩ﾟ)ﾟ｡/ its already long enough

[jokest3r]

Low effort drawing of (buffed) Matvey's new hair ! (His former hair style was boring so I spiced it up ! I am retiring this outfit and going to make him a new one since I think this one doesn't fit him anymore/I dont think it works(Anddd a more true depiction of his actual scar. Small undetailed chibi of him and some more info about him under the cut !)

He wears a gas mask but most of my art of him has been him without it, though that it'll likely change soon with the coming art of him on his specified tag on my blog ! Why exactly he carries that briefcase around we'll never know... you will though soon, hopefully? Depends on how fast I make his final ref sheet cos he's getting a massive upgrade!

Small Info Peek: He uses his gas mask to hide his identity from his father's hired mercs and "selfishly" to hide his own face from himself since he hates looking at what he's become/hates the way he looks. His father's war leaves no exceptions, even his own family.

[muqingslover]

hiii, can you please share more goofy habits caleb has while sharing a bed with u 💝

[ By popular demand i'm here to share extra thoughts on Caleb's sleeping habits! Kinda of a part two to this, in case you missed! ]

Oh boy there's so much to unpack here. We all know Caleb has experienced a loooot of bad things and has not worked through them in an actual healthy way at all. He is also a master at hiding it from you, but you can get a glimpse of how damaged he truly is during bedtime.

First of all, you will rarely, if ever, catch him sleeping on an actual bed. Or sleeping at all to be honest. What Caleb does is take power naps whenever he can on his couch at the office or when he's at your place waiting for you to. The one to (partially) blame for this is his chronic insomnia. I like to believe Caleb has always been a very light sleeper and it's only gotten worse throughout the years— The sound of a door opening is enough for him to be wide wake in a matter of seconds. Trust issues anyone?

When he wakes up, if alone, his go-to activity is working out. He'll do push-ups or leave the house for a loooong late night jog, anything that will tire his body out since he's wired up. Then, he takes a freezing cold shower to reboot his system and either starts to work early or sits down to solve some calculus problems to prevent his mind from thinking about anything else since it's 98% of the time never anything good.

To add to that, the main reason as to why his insomnia is so bad is the fact he has nightmares on an almost daily basis. They're often about you in some way and he wakes up panicking about where you are, how you are, if you're with someone else, why you aren't here with him instead and if you plan on leaving him. That's why it's so crucial for Caleb that you stay somewhere he can see you whenever he needs to. Otherwise, his anxiety will gnaw at him until he just shows up unprompted on your front door in the middle of the night.

On the topic of nightmares, next thing on the list is a more...sensitive one: His reactions to nightmares that involves the abuse Caleb himself went through. I say sensitive because this man is a trained soldier and he wakes up in very high alert which, sometimes, means he might hurt you by pure reflex similar to retired war veterans.

The first time you woke up with his hands tightly wrapped around your neck you seriously thought you were a goner. The sound of your voice calling his name was fortunately enough to make him snap out of the haze he was trapped in, believing he was under the threat of the ghosts of his past and had to defend himself before it was him the one who would end up dead. You have always been his anchor, it was not a surprise that you were the only one able to pull him back even in a moment like this.

Regardless if he had been in control or not, Caleb would blame himself until his last day on this world. He wouldn't sleep (Key word being sleep because he will stay in bed with you, he just won't *sleep*) on the same bed as you anymore after this and instead spends his nights on a mattress on the floor next to you. The sight of your bruised neck and the tears in your eyes because of his hands, because of him, only serve as fuel for his nightmares. He doesn't even want to imagine what would've happened if you hadn't been able to speak loudly enough to wake him up.

"Caleb is a big spoon!!" people yell at me and I agree! However! If you want this man to have some peaceful sleep then the only way to achieve that is to have him laying on your chest where he can both listen to your steady heartbeat and feel your warmth as he holds you. Run your fingers through his hair and promise him you'll be right there when he wakes up to soothe his anxieties as much as possible and he might just sleep throughout the entire night.

Moving on to more sweet thoughts so we don't end on a bitter note— He has serious beef with the plushies you own, specifically the ones you hug to sleep. I mean, he's right here? Hello??? Why would you want to hug that fat ass bear of yours. If your plushie goes missing one day through suspicious means don't be sad because you can just cuddle him! He promises he'll behave this time!

Another silly thing is Caleb cannot keep his hands to himself when the two of you are sharing a bed. Literally. His hands have a will of their own and they must be touching you at all times in some way. That also means he will bother you by torturing tickling you non-stop until you're on the verge of tears. He loves the sound of your joyful laughter and how red your face gets while you try to escape the evil tickle monster so I'm afraid there's no way to get him to actually stop.

[orellazalonia]

Where Were You Then?

Summary: You and a bunch of other people are moved to a new base due to the Avenger’s meddling. There, you bond more with one of your colleagues who warns you one night about what the Avengers may be up to; leaving you to sit with the weight of knowing they’re only now interested for reasons unknown.

Word Count: 2.9k+

Main Masterlist | The One You Don’t See Masterlist

You were just finishing up the day’s work when the knock came.

Not sharp, not urgent. Just a brief, polite tap on the metal frame of your open door. When you glanced up, a man in dark gray stood there. Clean uniform with no insignia you recognized, but the kind of posture that said he didn’t waste time unless it mattered.

“Can I speak with you?” He asked.

You gave a short nod and pushed your chair back. “Now’s fine.”

He stepped inside, calm but brisk, like someone used to planning six steps ahead. “We’re relocating you.”

You blinked. “Relocating?”

“It’s not disciplinary,” He clarified quickly. “Your record’s clean, your contributions are beyond solid. This is a matter of preemptive caution, for everyone.”

You straightened. “Meaning what, exactly?”

He hesitated, just a second too long.

“Details are on a need-to-know basis,” He spoke carefully. “But your transfer has been cleared. Secure transport will arrive within the next forty-eight hours. You’ll be reassigned to a secondary site more isolated and protected. Same role, just… farther from high-traffic areas.”

There was a weight to his words, one he wasn’t allowed to unpack.

Your mind jumped too easily. The Avengers? Could they have found a trail? No one here had ever said it outright, but this organization didn’t recruit former personnel from that world without reason. You didn’t ask, and he didn’t offer. But something in his tone softened when you stayed silent for too long.

“You’ve done good work here,” He said. “There are people who’ve noticed. This isn’t a punishment. It’s just… insurance.”

You nodded slowly. “Understood.”

He gave a short nod back. “You’ll receive the full transfer package in the morning. Pack light, essentials only. We’ll handle the rest.”

Then he left. Just like that. No apologies. No threats. Just… consideration. Like your presence actually meant something here, like moving you was part of protecting an asset, not brushing aside a liability.

It was strange, being treated like you mattered. Unsettling, almost.

You stared at your desk for a long time after, thoughts circling like vultures. You weren’t sure what was coming, or who was coming for that matter but this time, someone had moved you before the storm hit.

And somehow… that made all the difference.

They moved everyone at dawn.

For you, there was no drama. No armed escort. Just two people in a quiet transport vehicle, neither of whom spoke unless you did. The silence wasn’t cold, it was purposeful. Measured. Like even the air between words had been screened for unnecessary noise.

You watched the base disappear through a small, reinforced window. The trees beyond it blurred into gray-green smears. You didn’t ask where you were going. If you were meant to know, someone would’ve told you.

The transport itself took most of the day.

Surprisingly, there were no trackers, handcuffs, or weapons secured on your back. Just a sealed case of your belongings at your feet, and the weight of knowing this wasn’t just a job shift, it was a severing. A quiet severing from the last version of your life.

When you finally arrived, it wasn’t to a bunker or a prison. It was… clean. Remote, yes. Nestled in the shadow of a cold, low mountain range and shielded by layers of climate camouflage but still functional. It had a sharp-edged, efficient charm to it. Made of glass and steel, but no gloss.

Someone met you at the gate. Middle-aged, sun-weathered, and the kind of face that belonged more to ranches than espionage.

“Welcome.” He greeted, eyes kind but searching. “We’ve been expecting you.”

He didn’t offer his name, just a handshake. Firm, not too long. Genuine. You nodded once in return and stepped inside.

The interior was no different; quiet hallways, soft lighting, nothing flashy. Your new quarters were modest but well-prepared. A real bed. A desk with working equipment already logged in under your name. A few small touches that made it feel not temporary. There was also a chair pulled out. A folded set of fresh clothes. A cup and kettle beside sealed packs of tea.

Someone had gone out of their way to prepare for you.

That was new.

You didn’t unpack right away, just stood in the center of the room and let the silence fill in all the gaps the Avengers used to ignore.

Nobody here looked at you like you were an afterthought. They didn’t praise you either, but somehow that felt more honest. More grounded. You still weren’t anyone special, but you weren’t invisible.

Later, someone would bring you a meal without being asked. Even later, someone else would knock softly to ask if you needed help setting up your gear.

You weren’t sure what you’d expected when they said you were being relocated. Isolation? Containment? But not this. Not quiet competence. Not care in the form of practical support.

Still, the question lingered at the edges of your mind like a bruise that hadn’t healed right.

Why now? Why move you before anything happened?

What were they protecting you from?

Or more hauntingly, what were they protecting from you?

Regardless, you couldn’t dwell on it too much, you still had work. A job. You were still needed, wanted. Speaking of such, it was sometime past midnight when the knock came.

Two soft gentle taps, just enough to make sure you were awake, not enough to demand your attention if you weren’t. It was considerate.

You were awake, of course.

Sleep didn’t come easy anymore though. So you sat up, brushing the throw blanket from your legs, and moved to open the door.

Maren stood on the other side, still in her boots, curls pulled back in that effortless way that made her look always in motion. She had a folder tucked under one arm and a mug in the other, something warm and lightly spiced, if the smell was anything to go by.

“Sorry,” She apologized sheepishly. “I know it’s late. You can throw something at me if you want.”

You didn’t. You stepped aside.

She entered and settled into the chair near the desk with a soft sigh, setting the mug down in front of your chair. Cinnamon, you realized.

“I figured you were up,” She added, flipping open the folder on her lap. “Also figured if I stared at this mess any longer without asking someone smarter than me, I’d end up walking into a wall tomorrow.”

You arched a brow. “That happen often?”

“Oh, sure,” She replied easily, glancing at you with a lazy grin. “But this time I’d have deserved it.”

You didn’t answer, but you didn’t leave either. You sat down slowly, fingers curling around the mug. It was warm. Too warm to pretend you weren’t grateful.

Maren didn’t talk for a moment, just flipped through the schematics, frowning and murmuring something under her breath. Then:

“You ever miss it?” She asked. “The Tower. The mission boards. The forty-five emails from Stark at 2 a.m. because he was convinced everyone else had forgotten how to sleep?”

You didn’t answer right away.

She glanced up. “Sorry. I said I wouldn’t bring it up. I’m just–… curious.”

You stared into the steam curling from your mug. “I don’t miss being invisible.”

She didn’t smile at that, didn’t say “of course” or “you weren’t invisible.” Just nodded like someone who believed you.

“I used to work under people who never remembered my name,” She confessed after a moment. “I learned to smile fast, be useful, be quiet. Eventually someone told me I had a ‘pleasantly neutral presence.’” She snorted. “Didn’t know whether to thank them or cry.”

Your lips twitched, just a little. That was the thing with Maren. She didn’t really dig. She didn’t poke either. She just… dropped little stories beside you like breadcrumbs and let you decide if you wanted to follow.

You didn’t know what her role was here, not exactly. She wasn’t one of the shadowed higher-ups who briefed you through glass. She wasn’t part of security, or intel. But she had access. She came and went freely. Her badge could open more doors than yours.

And she kept coming back.

Every day, she brought something. Not always files. Sometimes it was a snack. A joke. A book she thought you’d like. Once, a scarf. “It’s ugly,” She warned you with a smirk. “But it’s warm. Don’t get sentimental.”

You’d kept it anyway.

Now, she leaned back in the chair and tapped a page in the folder. “This code, they’ve been using it to mask movement through the lower grid. I think it’s one of the Avengers’ old cloaking patterns. But I can’t break it alone. Thought maybe you’d enjoy the irony.”

You took the folder without replying and that was enough of an answer for her.

She pushed herself up a second later, stretching slightly, then moved toward the door, but paused before she left.

“…Hey,” She called softly, hand still on the frame. “If you ever get the urge to leave… walk out, disappear, whatever, I won’t stop you.”

You blinked. She turned slightly, looking at you over her shoulder. Her voice was quieter now. “I just hope someone finally deserves you enough to give you a reason to stay.”

The door closed gently behind her.

You stared at the folder in your lap. At the mug. At the silence she left behind, warm for once, not cold. And you didn’t know what scared you more:

That you were starting to truly care. Or that maybe… she already did.

In the new base, your days started earlier now.

Not because anyone made you. There were no mandatory check-ins, no shouting instructors or looming supervisors. But people noticed when you showed up early, and unlike the Tower, they actually said something about it.

Noticed you, that is.

The job was… well, it wasn’t so different, really. Coordination, data analysis, and communication relays between cells. You monitored activity across networks the Avengers didn’t know how to see, flagged inconsistencies, tracked patterns. Only this time, when you submitted a report, someone actually read it.

Once, someone even scribbled:

Brilliant work. You saved us three days. - E

On the margin of your printout in ink, as if it mattered.

It felt strange, at first. Being thanked and being seen. Even stranger was how the others treated you. They weren’t perfect. Some were gruff, standoffish, or slow to trust. But it wasn’t personal. It was how they were with everyone. You weren’t an outsider, they just weren’t the warm and fuzzy type.

Still, you found your rhythm.

There was Janek from logistics, who swore too much and brought you coffee and stale biscotti when he was grateful. There was Yara, who ran fieldwork planning and somehow always knew when you needed five minutes of silence and a desk light turned away just so to help your headaches.

And of course, there was Maren.

Her visits were less daily now, but they lingered longer. She’d still drop files or jokes or awful candy bars she pretended to love, but some days she just sat across from you, legs propped up on a nearby chair, flipping through a book or doodling in a notebook while you worked.

She never hovered, never demanded, never asked what you were thinking. But she always seemed to know when something was off.

One afternoon, when your hands had been trembling under the desk for half an hour, she passed you a pen you didn’t need and said, “You don’t have to break yourself to be useful here. That’s not the deal.”

You didn’t reply. But you held the pen a little tighter, just for the weight.

You weren’t in a cell. You weren’t being coerced. You hadn’t signed your name in blood. But somewhere between the cracked teacups, the high-security reports, the nods of appreciation, and Maren’s steady quiet, the lines had blurred.

This place, they made you feel like you mattered. And no one had ever done that before.

Still, there were nights you stared at the ceiling, palms clammy, and wondering if it was all too easy.

Too good. Too tailored. But when you thought about leaving, really leaving, your heart didn’t race with freedom. It knotted with fear. Not just fear of what they’d do, but of what it would feel like to go back to being invisible again.

The Avengers never saw you. But here, people did. Maybe that was manipulation. Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe you didn’t care.

However, you would have to figure it out sooner or later. The fact becoming more evident in your recent visit with Maren.

You weren’t expecting anyone. Most nights, you kept to your quiet rhythm. Work, rest, repeat. The corridors outside your quarters stayed empty this late, and that was how you liked it. Silence had become more of a comfort than people ever had.

So when the knock came with soft, deliberate, two even taps, you knew exactly who it was.

You didn’t speak. Just opened the door.

Maren stood there with her hands in the pockets of her jacket, shoulders relaxed but eyes too focused for this to be casual. She didn’t smile.

That alone made your chest tighten.

“Can I come in?” She asked softly.

You stepped back to let her through.

She hovered by the desk instead of sitting, gaze sweeping briefly over the files you’d abandoned and the mug still half-full beside them. It looked like any other night but she wasn’t treating it like one.

“You don’t usually stop by this late without something to drop off,” You said finally.

“I know.” She glanced at you. “Didn’t want to wait.”

That answer made something cold settle at the base of your spine.

You crossed your arms loosely, leaning back against the wall. “So don’t make me guess.”

Maren let out a breath, slow and tired. “They’re moving. The Avengers.”

You didn’t react outwardly, but your fingers curled just slightly against your sleeves.

“How close?”

“Not at the gates or anything. But they’ve started poking around. Someone pulled old records; training logs, field reports, tech inventories with your name half-scratched out of them.”

You looked away, jaw tight.

“You knew this might happen,” She said. “Didn’t you?”

You gave a soft shrug. “Eventually. I just thought they wouldn’t care enough to follow through.”

Maren didn’t deny it. “They didn’t… until now.”

She finally stepped closer, but not enough to crowd you. She wasn’t here to push. Just to deliver something real.

“I wanted you to hear it from me,” She said. “Before it’s sirens or breach codes or worse.”

You searched her expression. “Why warn me at all?”

She gave a small, tired smile. Nothing like the smirks or smiled she used when teasing you about snacks or work stuff.

“Because you’ve been more honest with me by saying nothing than most people ever are running their mouths,” She said. “Because you help, you’re there. And because even if you never told me what really happened with them, I can see it. In how careful you are, quiet, like you learned the hard way not to expect anyone to come back.”

You looked down. That last part hurt in a way you weren’t prepared for.

“And you’re not trying to stop me,” You murmured.

“No,” She said. “I’m just making sure you don’t get caught waiting for a rescue that may not happen.”

The silence stretched. Then, just as she turned to go, she paused and glanced back.

“Remember what I said… If you want to disappear, I won’t stop you. I’ll help. If you want to stay and fight, I’ll cover you. But whatever you choose, do it because you decided, not because you’re still trying to be something for people who never saw you.”

Your throat felt tight, but you nodded.

Maren didn’t say goodbye. She just touched the edge of the desk as she passed it again, a quiet habit she’d picked up, and slipped out into the hallway like she’d never been there at all.

You didn’t move for a long time once she was out of sight. Her words echoed, low and slow, like ripples spreading through still water. You sat down at your desk, fingers brushing the edge where she’d touched it last. An absent gesture, meaningless to most, but it reminded you that she saw you. Had, maybe, for longer than you wanted to admit.

But that didn’t make this choice any easier.

You’d walked away from the Avengers quietly, with barely a notice. Not because you wanted to disappear, but because they never looked hard enough to remember you were there in the first place. And yet, somehow, you weren’t gone. You were just… on the other side now.

Funny how that worked.

They’d start a war to fix a system, but not a conversation to fix a person.

You stared at the half-drunk coffee on your desk. The files a colleague had brought earlier, harmless recon work. Nothing personal, but it all now felt like a test. A choice dressed in paperwork. Stay or run. Fight or vanish.

Or wait for someone who never looked back.

You couldn’t decide tonight. Maybe not even tomorrow.

But you knew this: If the Avengers showed up, you wouldn’t be caught off guard. Not scrambling, not pleading, not waiting. You weren’t that girl anymore.

And if they asked you why?

…You still didn’t know what you’d say.

Maybe nothing at all. Maybe just:

"Where were you when I needed someone?"

Taglist: @herejustforbuckybarnes @iyskgd @torntaltos @julesandgems @maesmayhem @w-h0re @pookalicious-hq @parkerslivia @whisperingwillowxox @stell404 @wingstoyourdreams @seventeen-x @mahimagi @viktor-enjoyer @vicmc624 @msbyjackal @winchestert101 @greatenthusiasttidalwave @avivarougestan

[randomgurl2326]

Adam Relationship Headcannons

SFW

You two met after the whole Lilith and Eve debacle

You were sent to be his Guardian Angel down in the Garden of Eden. Honestly, he couldn’t care less about Eve when he first saw you

He was in the middle of the garden, talking to Eve and then you show up… man’s whipped. Simp I tell you

(Actually wished that you were made to be his wife instead of the baddie Lilith or the goodie-two-shoes Eve)

Again. Whipped.

Now, tho is guy… whewww. He may seem incredibly misogynistic to practically everyone around him. But he can be a total sweetheart

He would—if you didn’t know how to already—teach you how to shred on the guitar

Speaking of guitars, that gold strat that he had during the battle in the last episode is only used during a special occasion (case and point, when you two have a date night or after sex)

He also serenades you every chance he gets

After dinner

After a meeting

After sex

After just walking the goddamn promenade

I also think he would be heavenly (ha! See what i did there? No? Okay…) in the kitchen. Especially for date night. Adam knows how to make the best prime rib in heaven

(Lute totally hasn’t tried to blackmail the recipe out of him)

Adam is also very insecure about how he looks under his mask

Especially after having two wives ditch him for Lucifer

He definitely needs to be praised on a daily basis, even if it seems like he’s an egotistical asshole

Every day you tell him how handsome he is and he doesn’t believe you (c’mon have you seen him fuckin’ hot)

You two sometimes don’t see each other days on end because you both work so much. You being a high-ranking Angel/seraphim and him being well… the first man on Earth

If you guys go especially long for not seeing each other, you guys hole up a few days in your shared home spending time with each other among other things…

By the way, you and Lute are best friends, probably more than her and Adam

Like, seriously, if you’re not with him, you’re with her. Gossiping or fucking around, it’s heaven, there’s infinite things to do

You two are also very lovey dovey with each other

One time Sera had cover Emily’s eyes with her wings because you two were making out and feeling each other up in the middle of the Heavenly Court Room

Despite all of his faults, he’s a good husband to you, a great one actually. And if you two were to ever have kids, he’d definitely be the dad who everyone loves

He would introduce them to rock, punk, metal.

Definitely plays his guitar to get them to sleep every night

NSFW

Okay… he want lying about being the Dick Master. He can pleasure women, that is not a problem for him

Also, it might not seem like it, but he loves going down on you. Probably one of his favorite pass times actually

I swear, this man could make you scream his name within minutes. No joke

Don’t get me wrong, he loves receiving head

But just not as much as he loves eating pussy (Lilith and Eve missed out on that one for sure)

He also has a bigger dick than average

Probably 6-7.5 inches in length and hella girthy. Uncircumcised (duh), and a vein that runs up the bottom of it

Definitely knows how to use it

Every one within a five mile radius of your guys’ house… let’s just say I feel really bad for them

No joke, he is insane about pleasuring you

This probably also feeds into his insecurity about you leaving him (you won’t)

He for sure has a praise kink. Seriously, tell him he’s a good boy and he’s unraveling under your touch instantly

His favorite position is cowgirl (what can he say, he loves powerful women)

But he’s down for whatever position you want; missionary, warrior, against a wall, whatever

Speaking of wall sex, Lute has definitely caught you two more than once

The first time she did was when you two were in Adam’s office while he was supposed to be planning the next extermination. She came to ask him a question about it and there you two were. Goin’ at it like rabbits on the wall next to his desk

She couldn’t look you guys in the eye for three weeks. It was terrible

Adam also doesn’t seem like the type of guy to have sex toys or feel the need to use them

But, again, he’s whipped. So he’s willing to do whatever you want to do

Wont admit this to anyone but you, but he likes to sub every once in a while. Especially with all the ‘first man’ stuff weighing down on him he needs a way to get away from all that stress

Despite him making crude jokes about sex, he’s a very giving partner in bed

He had to make sure you cum at least twice before he gets his dick wet

Also, have I mentioned how good he is at eating pussy? Oh, I have? Yeah, well, he is (especially with that tiny bit of stubble on his chin… gahhh)

Just needed to get it out there

All in all, Adam is a very giving person in bed, can be selfish at times but will make up for it. He loves you too much for you to feel mad or upset (especially with him)

A/N: this was my first time writing for Adam and Hazbin in general. I hope you liked it. I love you all💚💜

[mediumgayitalian]

The best part of being his own camp counsellor is that he can wake up whenever the fuck he likes.

Nico’s a fan.

Because, however, his dumb ass made friends with the camp’s head medic, he doesn’t get to sleep in as often as he would like. He is instead often woken up before the clock strikes nine, which is a tragedy and one of the forty thousand reasons he is going to be present on Will’s judgement day. (The scales tip any which way on a regular basis, but as of last week, Will is going to hell. Unfortunate. Nico’ll still visit him, though. Bring him one half of a twizzler or something.) So when he wakes up, one lovely morning, mouth tasting like something rotted in it and sun well past halfway across the sky, he is capital-C Concerned.

What a horrible tragedy that is. Finally, for the first time in months, he was able to sleep in. And his first thought is not gratitude. Solace may indeed have to die — Nico was not this way before he started planting his annoying ass front and centre in Nico’s life. He’s quite fairly certain he used to be frightening and badass. Now Will orders him to drink milk for the sake of his calcium and he does. Gods.

“Morning,” he hedges, approaching the archery range, feeling marginally more alive than twenty minutes prior.

Kayla raises an amused eyebrow. “Dude, it’s, like, two.”

“Well fuck you, then.”

She smirks. “Aw, did baby not get his Sunshine fix of the day? Is that why he’s so grumpy?”

It really sucks that Will is so fond of his siblings. Nico wonders if Will would still like him if he knew how many times he daydreams of transporting Kayla onto the moon per day.

“As soon as I figure out which god would appreciate you as a sacrifice, you’re gone.”

“Yeah, right,” she snorts, turning away and lining up an arrow. She lets it fly, watching as it shaves a splinter off a hunk of wood fifty feet away. “You couldn’t get close enough to kick my ass before I’d skewer you, di Angelo.”

Remembering the warning arrow Kayla had shot through his shoulder last week, he wisely chooses not to press the matter any further. The power visibly goes to her head. Fuck.

“Just — tell me where Will is.”

“Why?” She strings another arrow. The grin on her face is a level of shit-eating that Nico has only before seen on a Stoll. She should spend less time around Julia, or else the camp is in for some serious trouble. “What are your intentions with my dear brother?”

Nico, on principle, refuses to answer that question. Kayla shrugs, finishing her shot and then turning around to stick her tongue out at him.

“No answer, no location! Find him yourself, loverboy. And remember that I am always watching.”

Stomping away, and ignoring the smile twitching at his lips — she is so annoying, truly, gods above he owes Bianca a thousand apologies for ever opening his mouth — he heads towards the infirmary. There are only six locations Will is at any given time, after all, except when he disappears for several hours randomly but Nico doesn’t know how to bring that up yet. As he approaches the infirmary, though, he hears it absolutely blasting with music, like genuinely shaking the ground a little bit, and knows exactly where to find him.

As he approaches the door, wincing at the door, he finds it closed. Odd — Will likes a breeze when he works. Even odder is the hastily-written sign pasted onto it:

ANNUAL CLEAN OUT DAY. IF YOU NEED ME, TOUGH SHIT. IF YOU NEED A BANDAID, TOUGH SHIT. IF YOU’RE BLEEDING OUT, CALL AN AMBULANCE AND PRAY. I AM BUSY.

(‘Busy’ is underlined three times.)

In smaller print, under the all-caps monstrosity, is:

Unless you’re Nico, in which case disregard the previous sentiment. No, Cecil, this does NOT mean you.

The note is written again in Ancient Greek, Latin, Spanish, Portuguese, French, Mandarin, Italian, Polish, Korean, Morse Code, and another ten languages Nico can’t even name. Actually, wait — the top left is Klingon. And middle right note does not appear to be language, showing instead a poorly drawn stick figure in armour being shoved into a cannon and shot into the sun by another poorly drawn stick figure in a lab coat. Nico loves a man who’s multi-talented, indeed.

Hesitantly, Nico cracks open the door. He is immediately assaulted by a solid wall of sound, and then nearly bowled over by the enigma himself, William ‘I Can Restructure A Human Brain But Cannot Tie My Shoelaces’ Solace. He catches himself at the last second, and then barely manages to catch Will, grabbing him around the waist just before his head hits the floor.

“Nico!” he shouts over the music, smiling brightly. “Hi! You’re here!”

“I’m here.” He can physically feel his voice cracking, but luckily the music drowns it out. Hopefully. “Uh, what’re you doing?”

“Cleaning!” Will straightens up, although he stays within the circle of Nico’s arms. Nico tries real hard to keep his gaze firmly planted on his face and not on the hands he still has in his hips. “I do it once a year, kick everybody out and deep clean the place. Helps keep it fresh and minimize the bloodstains on the floor.”

“Ah. And the music…”

“It’s fun!” Will shouts. He gasps when the CD player skips and a new song comes on, heavy base and funky synths blasting so hard the window panes shake. “Oh my gods! I love this one!” He turns his bright grin at Nico full force, absolutely no holdbacks on the dimples or freckles, gods help him, and bows cheekily. “Can I have this dance, good sir?”

“It’s Britney Spears’ Outrageous,” Nico protests weakly.

“Yeah!”

…Very, very weakly.

“…Okay.”

Will whoops, grabbing his hands and spinning him around. Nico yelps, nearly tripping over a cot, but when he looks back up Will has his eyes closed and is shimmying not unlike a worm on a fish hook, and it’s so ridiculous that he can’t help but laugh. Will pries one eye open, grinning widely, and shimmies harder.

“You’re such a dweeb!”

“Join me in the dweebiness! Free yourself!”

Nico rolls his eyes fondly, squeezing Will’s hand, and lets himself get ridiculous. He’ll deny it if anyone asks, but it’s fun.

…And not just because Will is next to him, smile brighter than any star, dancing like a massive dork, hand clasped in his.

[cafeleningrad]

Ohtori is such a disorienting place. It's so emblematic that none of the actual needs of the people in it are met. In fact it gives answers but none actually are satisfying for anyone yet the answers are presented as only alternative. ("You have to revolutionize the world (by participating in the duels that ensure the world continues to run on the same old dynamic.)"

What system Ohtori, Akio by proxy, proposes is the idea of power over another. It's very gendered power as we learn later. Women's power exists either as extension's of a man (Nanami's high social status by virtue of being Touga's little sister), be inspired to have power by extension of a man (Wakaba), surrendering to a man (Kozue), or can be easily taken away power if a man decides that the woman had enough power (Juri,Utena). In the instance a woman has power it's also used to dominate others just like men do. (Nanami being cruel to others, to Tsuwabuki in particular, Utena treating Anthy her a puzzle piece to her princely identity.) In the end there is an idea how someone who should hold all the power should be like (the Prince), and they're given free reign. However that's not what the characters need.

Touga is entirely helpless to his paternal CSA. Akio's proposition is to become, for once, the one in charge of others so none can exploit him again. And Touga fails to see how Akio still exploits him by directing Touga, with quiet implicit imagery stressing that dynamic. What Touga would have needed was protection and a trusting family.

Nanami grew up so isolated and shamed for diverging from the norm, she is entirely dependent on external subjects and objects to define her. Either it's being defined by her relationship to Touga which is the entire basis of her social status, and her only hope for affection. Nanami can only define herself by traditional feminine and classicist means like her perceived ideal femininity, and brand-name jewelry which can easily turn on her, if external voices tell her that she should wear something. Nanami is so desperate for affection, being cared and loved for but the only language she is given is Ohtori's language of "men and women are only corresponding romantically". She can't express her need for familial proximity to Touga. The only other form of gaining adoration she knows is by violence, be it Touga's kitten, Tsuwabuki, or beating her three nameless underlings into submission.

It's not until the third arc that we learn about the Kaoru twins are in the middle of their parents separating. Their childhood is getting disrupted. Both of them are longing for time of connection and chance to hold onto each other. But Ohtori tells them that Miki can only adore Kozue as innocent and helpless. Kozue, like Nanami, gets told that her only chance to express affection to her male twin is by a sexualized, romanticized interaction. For two characters who're living through turbulent times, and need some stability in the other, twisting their chance of proximity is exactly the wrong answer.

Saionji really wants to remain friends with Touga he admires so much. (If not being in love with him.) Even more than Juri, he knows that the duel platform is just a set up, he swallows Touga's poison of "true friendship doesn't exist" again and again. The only chance of proximity to Touga is to disrespect others, demonstrate superiority over them, especially Anthy, as best proxy to a close male-male-dynamic. Saionji's only given path is to delude himself further and further.

Juri pushes so many people away because she's afraid her homosexuality will be revealed. Ohtori as a place does punish homosexuality severely, see Mikage's twisted memory, Ruka trying to converse Juri. This place convinces Juri over and over again that she's wrong for loving Shiori. But the truth is, Shiori is so much in love with Juri that she will resort to abuse her emotional power as long as it serves the purpose of Juri remaining close to her. What they would have needed is the chance to know that actually they're safe to be honest, at least to each other.

Utena is deeply grief-stricken by her parent's death. As a child the idea that everything will fade is terrifying. The only alternative she is shown is that Anthy's suffering is eternal. She wants to help. But the only path for being admired and adored is becoming a prince. The only agency to help and save others is by exercising the prince's power over someone. Akio becomes even crueler by trying to convince Utena that a girl's actual aspiration is romance (with a man). What else should she want? It also distract her from her genuine compassion for Anthy, and wishing for Anthy's happiness.

[unhinged-greed]

New blog for my old Mammon sideblog ( @unhinged-greed-a )

Independent rp and ask blog for the Sin of Greed himself. Penned and loved by Beanie~

Affiliated with; @houseofasmodeus @more-things-in-heaven-hell @queenbeeibee (will be adding the rest )

Please read the RULES before following. Thank you~

Ask // Rules // Mun // Verses // Headcanon // Promo post (share if you want ;; ) My other blogs are; @peppy-jester (Fizzarolli) and it's sideblog @wired-for-trouble (Barbie Wire)

Rules under the cut for mobile users;

Selective and Mutuals only I want to keep my dash clean and easy to follow. I may not follow back at everyone. Especially if you have same muse in your blog as mine. I actually have a duplicate anxiety, minus with few of my close friends. If Mam is not your main thing on your multi that’s also fine for me.

Multimuse and Multifandom friendly-ish. Picky with OC’s. If your multi has muses from fandoms I don’t like, I won’t be following you back. There are fandoms that have made my life living hell one way or another so I choose to stay away from them.

As for OC’s, I have mixed feelings. May or may not follow your OC blog.

Headcanon Based and “Canon Divergent”. I base my Mammon on some of the irl Mammon lore but also mixed with Vivziepops version. Canon Divergent as in he is not that much into show business that much, his main focus is to make money by buying facilities and by all the companies and stores he owns. I’m not gonna say no to people who wants to throw Glitz and Clam at him but he is not gonna treat them any different than Fizz. And as Viv said those two are only popular in Greed ring which is huge loss compared to Fizz who was well known across all the rings of hell. I will be posting headcanons and tag those as #Headcanon;; / #About Muse;;

Shipping Is not a thing on this blog. This is one ship blog with only my friends Ozzie (rapid-as-sass-in-nation-team). If you are gonna follow Mammon just a sake of shipping, I suggest you don’t even bother following this blog. Mammon is Ace and sorta sex repulsed. He will be hating Sindays forever. Friendship, Hateship… everything else are welcome! Gimme Sins being friend-enemies! Give me all Adams for him to fuck around with! He legit needs friends.

NSFW & Triggering themes Where I won’t be posting anything sexual here but darker rp themes may occur. Plus Mammon’s foul language. If the word “Cunt” offenses you. I’m sorry. Mammon swears like a pirate. I will be tagging triggers as “#Tw; Blood” or “#Tw; Injury”. If I forget to tag anything please let me know. I’m not here to make anyone uncomfortable.

Muses of this blog Mammon is the main thing but at times you may also see his twin female Fizz bots who works as his assistance. Their names are Coin and Penny. Both have personalities and they are sentient. You may also see Fizzarolli here popping up. My main Fizz blog is @Peppy-Jester 

Do not follow me if you’re a; -Minor (automatic block). Mun of this blog is +35 years old and don’t wanna get in trouble because of you. -Personal who keeps liking all the posts and reblogging from me (blocked) -Homophobe, Fat Phobe, Racist, Support SA, Spread the unwanted/unneeded OOC drama etc. I don’t tolerate that kind of shit at all. Zero tolerance! -You are always in a hurry with replies. I happen to have a life offline, a job. I’m not here even daily basis. Sure if I haven’t replied in few weeks, please kick me. I may have forgotten thanks to my ADHD ass.

Ask Box Is open for everything. I welcome everyone to piss this well rounded fella off. Or just send in requires, thoughts, even M!A's. But if the things goes too personal or too sexual I will just ignore the asks. Spreading OOC drama will get you ignored and blocked

Discord Is for mutuals only. I don’t add just anyone because I have at times hard time replying on things there.

Few more things for my mutuals - Please reblog from the source, unless there is none then you are free to blog from me. -Don't hop in the rp middle of everything. You don't know how many mutuals I've had to block because of this happening. -I happen to use icons in my replies, you don't have to. It's optional and if you want me to drop the icons as well let me know. -My replies varies from few lines to several paras depending how my muse works for me at the time. I try to end it so you have something to reply to. -If I post art I it's most likely my own. Reblogging fanart at times. -Muse and Mun are not the same. Mammon can be bit sexist, he still thinks women aren't as funny as men and he has rather strong opinions on things he believes in. 

Following tag #Unhinged-Greed or #UnhimgedGreed

If you’ve read the rules, send me a password; Greed is Good.

[kishibe-kisser]

Types of kisses (w/ Baizhu, Childe, Dainsleif, Thoma)

Something entirely self-serving because I'm having a funky mental health day.

Tags: Kissing, touches, slight hair pulling, neck kisses

mentions of nsfw/ more suggestive

Baizhu: Gentle kisses. Maneuvering around eachother at the pharmacy, only pausing for him to plant a soft kiss on your forehead. His hand finds the back of your neck, pulling you into him so he can kiss your face gently. It's a small, silent 'I love you' in the middle of a busy day. His gentle eyes looking at you from across the room beckoning you for another silent 'i love you'.

Slow and passionate kisses. The moment you two have an actual moment to yourselves, his hands are holding your face and making sure he has your full attention before kissing you. His lips soft and gentle against yours, you can even slightly taste some herbs on his tongue. His hands always move to your hair, toying with the tresses and tugging on them gently. If time permits it, he'll tug your top down to expose your shoulder and kiss down the skin to leave marks for only him to find.

Childe/Tartaglia: Playful kisses. He's the type to cover your eyes and have you guess who's behind you. It's always him and you know that but you like to play along and sometimes for shits and giggles you answer with someone else's name. When he shakes his head disapprovingly, he'll peck your lips sweetly. Other than that, he likes peppering your face in kisses as he tickles you and makes you laugh. Your laughter is his favorite thing in the whole world, so on a day to day basis he just keeps the affection light and sweet.

Playful kisses don't just stay wholesome, chasing you to the bedroom with laugh before pinning you to the wall. He likes making things a game up until he catches you. His smile turns slightly sinister before kissing you deeply, thigh wedging between your legs as he pulls your hair to expose your neck.

Dainsleif: Goodbye kisses. When you're out and about, it'll be a miracle if he pulls you to the side for a kiss. It's incredibly rare. With all he's been through, the worst fear in his life is losing more people he loves. So when you are about to go your seperate ways for whatever, he pulls you to the side and looks you in your eyes. His hands holding your face and stroking the skin before telling you to be safe and kissing your forehead/lips/cheek. He also likes to remind you that if you need him, he'll be right there.

Feverish kisses. When he needs you, he absolutely needs you. Kissing you like his life force depends on it. Walking you backwards and pressing you into the nearest surface. Every emotion he has is put into kissing you, savouring you. His hands map out your body to make sure he never forgets a single curve or bump.

Thoma: Sneaky kisses. Thoma loves to steal a kiss while he's working, pulling you to the side behind a corner to kiss your lips quickly and then get back to work. The kisses leave him giddy the rest of the day and the more he manages to steal from you, the more he can't stop smiling. He thinks it's just so fun to do almost like it's a game to see if you can kiss without getting caught.

Gentle kisses. In contrast to how he is around others. When it's just the two of you, he treats you like glass. Not kissing you too roughly to show you how much he cherishes you. He smiles alot inbetween kisses, pausing to look at you only to smile even more. He kisses down your body with the same energy, taking time to make sure you feel cherished.

A/N: Just wanted to write something for me! Will work on the new requests I received now, I had a busy week.

[send-noodles-not-nudes]

ok but since my "carlton lassiter/cain is stupidly pretty" post got way more likes than i was expecting it to (i expected exactly one from the one person on here that i know has seen psych and seen me ramble about my fic) i need to curse you all with my brainrot about spenser olivia spencer

and YES i seriously named my oc spenser spencer. and it comes up a lot. and her initials are sos bc honestly the entirety of psych is kind of a crack fic and i just wanted to match that energy

SO: ONTO THE BRAIN WORMS....

the fic is called "i know, you know, but he doesnt"

ikykbhd started out as a joke bc when i watched psych a few years ago i made a post about "haha it would be so funny if shawn had a sister that was ACTUALLY psychic" and it all went downhill (in a good way) from there

i have so many notes for it that i planned out literally an entire calendar year and broke the notes app on my phone bc the file is so large that it takes a solid 45 seconds for my phone just to load the damn thing (and thats only half the notes bc i started using a different note instead after it started taking a small eternity to load)

before i got the loki brainrot, my psych fic was the one i would write a little of every night before bed and i should get back to it but the worms have moved to marvel and spn and id like to finish something before bouncing to yet another fic

but anyway.

insert my lil rant here about how james roday rodriguez is actually mexican on his dads side and when i found that out it made me really mad bc both of his stage parents in psych were white and they call shawn white on multiple occasions for literally no reason bc they could have easily just let him be latino like irl but thats beside the point

so i mentally recast his mom as salma hayek after watching the hitmans bodyguard bc honestly i feel like shawn had to get his crazy from somewhere and it just fits ok? ok. she can still be a police psychologist with an eidetic memory but i refuse to accept that shawn in all of his adhd glory pulled his hyperactivity out of thin air

and then i gave him a sister

bc that was the whole plotline

and i was not expecting to love her as much as i did

shes shawns older sister and it definitely shows in their dynamic, especially with backstory elements i ended up throwing in later, but theyre very close and i decided that her being psychic is what inspired him to lie in the first place to get psych started bc hey, hes seen it play out before and he knows exactly how to make it work, so why not?

spenser, an army nurse who has a bad relationship with her powers, does not appreciate this. but she doesnt want his dumb ass to get in trouble by outing him, so she shuts her mouth and watches him make a mockery of the things she stuggles with on a daily basis

but that doesnt mean she cant mock him back

for context, she has a bunch of different psychic abilities, but the main one is actually one she cant control that well. she has psychometry, the ability to gain information just from touching things. unfortunately for her, this happens every single time she touches anything, ever. the only way around it is wearing gloves or using something as a barrier between her and whatever she touches. and yes, it works on people.

her introduction to the sbpd is her and shawn coming into the station on their motorcycles racing each other very loudly (and ofc she lets him win, but she'd never admit) and getting the attention of all the major characters, including spensers eventual (begrudging) love interest

vick just lectures them both about "why are you racing it's the middle of the night youre gonna hurt yourself" gus lets out a girly squeal bc spenser is a good friend and it's been 15 whole years since hes seen her so hes a little excited lassiter (the begrudging love interest, if you couldnt tell from my liveposts about cain) is initially into it bc hey shes really pretty ! 10/10 would date... and then he sees the pineapple sticker on her bike and realizes who she must be and decides that they must be mortal enemies (it doesnt work out well for him) jules is mostly just amused by the fact shawn apparently has a sister hes never said anything about and she can tell almost immediately that her partner is into spenser and she cannot wait to see how it pans out

her introduction is my favorite just bc of the dialogue bc it sets the tone for the relationships for the entire rest of the fic and the more of it i write, the more i love coming back to that first scene bc i had no idea it was so perfect when i wrote it

im not gonna repost the whole thing (i'll be editing and reposting it here at some point in time when i get the brain worms for it again) but i do wanna throw in the initial dialogue

it all starts off with vick asking shawn, "is there a reason you've invited a stranger to our murder investigation, spencer?" then seeing the pineapple sticker and going "please dont tell me thats-"

"my sister! 😁" hes so happy.

"oh, God, there's two of them?" from a lassiter whos now trying so hard to ignore that shes kinda hot and he was totally gonna ask her out but uhhhhhhh,,, not anymore

"just wait; it gets better. trust me. im spenser olivia spencer." (she uses her full name when she introduces herself bc some people get weirded out by it and call her olivia instead of spens/cer)

"carlton lassiter. it's... good to meet you, olivia." "that was only one sentence. and are you really afraid of snow globes?" "*visible confusion and fax machine noises*" "i'll wait."

"how did you do that? and is your name really spenser spencer?" "yeah. one with an s and one with a c. dont wear it out." "so your initials are sos? seriously?" hes waiting for them to say it's all a prank. "mhmm. my parents had a very... unique sense of humor." "no kidding. and they didnt think to at least even the score and give your brother the same, uh... uniqueness?"

"oh, his middle name is octavius. i, for one, find that much worse than being spencer squared." "hey-!" from a huffy shawn, "youre the one who came up with that, anyways! it's not like i asked to be named that." aka i googled if his middle name was ever revealed and took advantage of the fact that it wasnt

"my name is at least normal, compared to his. oh! to answer your question from earlier, i know all about your daddy issues and your little war reenactments and your figure skating-" "lassie, you do figure skating?" "-because im a psychic. didnt i tell you it gets better?"

and she leaves lassie there to just be confused about what the fuck just happened so she can meet jules next, who just says "ooh, me next!" bc shes excited about the psychometry and that shawn has a sister and it just kinda goes from there

but yeah it was my first ever enemies to lovers fic and i love it way too much

one of the things that came later that i love is shawn seeing that lassiter has Feelings™️ for spenser and being so overprotective of her that youd almost think he was the older sibling if you didnt know and it backfires on him so badly

also lassiter was one of my first autistic hc characters and i love writing him sm

this is long enough so the last thing i'll say is that this fic also accidentally brought me some of my favorite writing, including my tradition of using humor to break up angst scenes that are a little too angsty for a little too long, and shawns continual butchery of phrases like saying "destruction of justice" instead of "obstruction of justice" and my personal favorite, "look me in the ass and tell me-" "it's 'look me in the EYES', shawn" "ive heard it both ways." which i still think about on a daily basis

[poppitron360]

Wait. I wanna hear you Will Solace headcanons

Okay so be prepared for these to be wildly inaccurate because all I know about this guy is from fannon. Most of this is also me projecting.

1. Bass player. Yes that is 100% biased, as I am also a bass player (and I hc myself as a legacy of Apollo). No I have no basis on this claim other than Basses Are Just Cooler Than Guitars.

2. OR he’s the guitarist, Nico is the Bassist.

3. If there is a piano in the house, he WILL play it. For hours. Gods forbid you take him anywhere with a public piano.

4. Hates learning Music Theory, learns by ear and by feel. As an Apollo kid, he can instantly read both tab and sheet music, but uses neither.

5. Also has perfect pitch (can name any chord just by hearing it).

6. He’s a Star Wars fan, right? Can talk for hours about John William’s use of Lydian Mode in the score to convey a sense of majesty, and don’t get him started on the expert use of Vagnarian methods of leitmotif-

7. Okay, so maybe he knows a little music theory.

8. Writes terrible poetry that’s low-key kinda good.

9. Founder of the chb LGBTQ+ club.

10. Bisexual flags everywhere. He always at least one pink, purple, and blue pen on hand, doodles exclusively in those colours. His doctors notes are colour-coded pink, purple, blue.

11. BIG supporter of Trans rights- is qualified to help with Gender Affirming Healthcare for anyone at Camp.

12. Apollo is also god of prophecies. Will has the power of foresight ONLY for TV show/Film/Book endings. He is able to predict how a character would die with incredible accuracy after one episode. Morbid as fuck, so naturally Nico thinks it’s the hottest thing ever.

13. SWIFTIE!!!!!

14. Friendship bracelets. VERY swiftie-coded, he has a million of them on both arms, cutting off his circulation.

15. Paints Nico’s nails. Nico insists on all black, but gave in and let Will paint ONE nail fun colours, bedazzled with charms and shit. As long as it’s the middle finger.

Now, specifically my Will x Leo (Platonic) headcannons:

16. Will and Leo become very close at camp simply because Leo has absolutely zero sense of self-preservation. Like that kid does not value his life in any way at all, and so always ends up doing the most reckless shit ever, and, naturally, ends up spending a lot of time in the infirmary, usually only after being dragged there by Jason (“What’s the big deal? It’s just a broken arm. I’m ambidextrous! Besides, I’ve survived worse.”)

17. Will loves him because he’s never there longer than he has to be.

18. Except sometimes he does have to force Leo back into bed while Leo’s yelling loudly about how he needs to get back to his work, the Argo II won’t build itself, and to let go of him or he’ll burn you.

19. Will makes him wear enchanted plasters (band aids) that he can’t take off without doctor’s permission, to stop him absent-mindedly picking at old scabs and bits of skin. He also keeps fidget toys and stress balls to give to his patients. Leo has stolen ALL of them.

20. Like seriously, it is a problem. Leo has had to make them a whole bunch more fidgets because he’s taken and then overworked them until they all broke.

21. Both their southern accents come out more when they talk to each other. If a conversation goes on too long, they evolve into using so much fast-paced Texan slang that no-one else can understand them- it’s practically its own language.

22. BOTH SWIFTIES!!!!!

23. Leo helps out in the infirmary a lot- he’s useful if you need to sterilise equipment or cauterise any wounds.

24. It works sort of like an exchange of favours, where Leo also calls on Will anytime he needs a human flashlight to work on a project.

25. Leo has a lot of scars from his rough childhood. Will is one of the few people (aside from Jason) who’s actually seen them all. They never talk about it, and, as his doctor, he’s sworn to secrecy, but some of them are really disturbing. It will never not shock him that demigods can get hurt by things in the mortal world.

26. Leo makes sure Will uses accurate engineering jargon when writing Star Wars fanfiction.

27. Aside from Leo, Nico is the only one who reads his fanfiction

[the-banana-splits-blog]

2 banana

Introducing the gorillatan on the drums, Bingo B. Grey

Any post with the tag The Gorillatan on the drums (Bingo) will have Bingo on them

Below is his info post on the blog.

Bingo is a very energetic and mischievous gorillatan, if there is some kind of problem, he most likely caused it.. but besides that, he is a pretty sweet guy and just a big teddy bear. He is quite strong, but never really wants to hurt anyone, but he seems to be the most protective of the gang if they run into trouble.. well, most of the time. You can mostly find this gorillatan reading comic books or stealing sweets and stuff (mostly goes after any baked goods Snorky had made)

Since retiring from the show, he hasn’t changed much. Still as mischievous as ever and has no plans on stopping. Though he does sometimes give the gang a break from his shenanigans every now and then and goes to his parents place for a bit to catch up. (He lives kind of far from his parents and siblings)

Bingo is currently 29 years old

Personality:

A big time prankster, very happy go lucky and rarely anything other than happy (if Bingo is sad, it would most likely be something serious), very energetic, a bit too much energy.. quite protective, 100% a goofball, but will be serious if needed.

Little Facts:

Bingo is the main interpreter for Snorky, while the gang knows some of the honk Language, Bingo is quite skilled in it

Bingo’s bedroom is customized with many handlebars and rings on the ceiling as it’s his way to burn some energy while swinging around his room. Speaking of his room, Bingo is the only one that doesn’t sleep in a normal bed, he sleeps in a hammock and surprisingly, his room it pretty clean.

As you know, Bingo rarely loses his smile, but if ya get him angry then he can lose that smile. (The two things that make him the most angry? Messing with someone he cares about or messing up his banana buggie)

Bingo has a fear of tight spaces (you can thank a certain older brother of his)

Bingo is actually the strongest, but he gives the title of strongest banana to Snorky (he don’t like to hurt people anyway)

He has a huge appetite, he can eat a lot.. has been banned from quite a few all you can eat buffets

This gorillatan is prone to danger, he seems to get hurt a lot but always bounces back rather quickly. Out of everything he’s been through, he only has one scar.. that being on his chest, somewhat near his heart.

Relationships with the gang:

Fleegle- he has known Fleegle the longest and were (still are) best buddies, Bingo does consider Fleegle a brother in a way despite already having plenty of brothers. Nowadays, Fleegle is clearly tired of all of the pranks and stupid things Bingo does on a daily basis, but occasionally, he’ll get a smile out of that beagle.

Drooper- him and Drooper do consider each other friends, but they do have their ups and downs. As teens, they never got along, it was always Fleegle trying to separate the two so a fight doesn’t start. Nowadays, they are friends but do get irritated at one another if they spent too much time with each other.. of course with Drooper’s mindset today, he normally runs away from Bingo if he irritated him a bit too much…

Snorky- Bingo and Snorky are quite close, he is the whole reason Snorky even joined the band. Bingo was the first to learn the honk language and Snorky was over joyed when someone that wasn’t in his family could understand him. Their relationship can be a bit confusing from time to time as Bingo likes being a pest to him, teasing him and stealing things Snorky bakes and it all normally ends up with Bingo thrown by the little elephant, but at the end of they day, they are as happy as they can be and have no harsh feelings towards each other

Family:

Bingo is the middle child of 13 siblings. Out of all his siblings there is only one girl, her name is June and she is also the oldest. Bingo does in fact have a twin brother, his name is Dingo. They look nearly identical, but the main differences is that Dingo is calmer, has a different voice and does not have 2 different colored eyes. There is also 2 more sets of twins and one set of triplets in this big gorillatan family.

Bingo’s mama is Bethany Grey, a laid back, calm, and very loving orangutan. She has a big heart for all her children and is very protective over them no matter how big they are. Bethany doesn’t have a favorite, but she does say that Bingo has always been the most unique one out of them all. Bethany seems to always be sleepy even though she takes a lot of naps, she just says that’s how she looks.

Bingo’s pops is Charles Grey, a monotone and stern gorilla. He doesn’t speak much nor does he make a lot of expressions, but he loves all his kids greatly and has been as gentle with them as he can. He isn’t as social as Bethany, but he tries to be there for his many kids, but it is a bit hard for him. Same with Bethany, he doesn’t pick favorites, but he did think that Bingo would make a name for himself one day with his unique personality and he was right about that, he is quite proud of Bingo.. even if the gorillatan gets a bit too much for him.

[cringecompanionapologist]

Making History AKA The Steven Taylor Mpreg Story

So there's this Short Trip. And I read it. I'ma talk about it.

So, there's this diplomat named Robert Simmons who's supposed to sign a peace treaty with some poisonous jellyfish people called the Omwanar. The story begins with a passage from a future history book about it. The humans and Omwanar were at war for Reasons (the book isn't even sure) and Simmons is here to put a stop to it.

Well, he would be, if he wasn't dead. Despite being in perfect health, he randomly died of a heart attack right before he was supposed to meet up with Omwanar ambassador. Two other guys, Harlow and Malvin, are trying to figure out what to do now. The TARDIS just happens to land in the middle of this.

Malvin is very "let's just keep being at war" while Harlow is open to the idea of an actual plan, which the Doctor has. The Omwanar don't know what Simmons looks like, so they could easily pass anyone off as him. The Doctor volunteers Steven for this.

The Doctor talks about his past experience dealing with hostile aliens and it's funny because he gives some really bad examples:

The Zarbi in The Web Planet were basically animals who were only hostile because of evil mind control. The Rills in Galaxy 4 look ugly and scary but are actually really nice because Galaxy 4 is a "don't judge a book by its cover" fable for children. The Sensorites didn't trust the humans but only one of them was hostile. The rest were just anxious and indecisive.

Steven then mentions the Daleks, who actually are hostile, far more than the Omwanar could possibly be, since a Dalek would never sign a peace treaty. Still, Steven is better at listing hostile alien continuity references than the Doctor is.

So Steven pretends to be Robert Simmons and Malvin continues to go apeshit over how doomed they all are. But, it actually goes pretty well. Thanks to the TARDIS translation circuits, Steven can understand the ambassador, Lyshur Lysus, without a translator making things difficult, and that immediately gains Lyshur's respect.

They talk for a bit, and end up on first name basis, with Steven, pretending to be a Robert, going by Bob, and it becomes really obvious that Lyshur really likes "Bob". Leading to:

Steven has to find a way to politely decline while the Doctor decides to examine the body of real Simmons and finds out he was poisoned with Omwanar venom. He quickly figures out that the murderer was Malvin, trying to frame the Omwanar to keep the war going to give humanity a reason to wipe the Omwanar out.

Lyshur further explains the "seeding" thing: The baby Omwanar will have fresh meat to eat when they are born. So this is more of an Alien Chest Burster sort of situation. If Steven were to accept he would die, so it's not the mpreg that really upsets him here.

But, before the situation can be sorted out, with Lyshur needing to lay those eggs right the fuck now, Malvin runs in and starts shooting. Lyshur is hit, Steven tries to protect them, there's a scuffle, and Lyshur seems to sort of temporarily absorb both Steven and Malvin into their jellyfish body for a second.

When it's over, Lyshur is dying. It's not from being shot. It turns out that Omwanar die after laying eggs. Which Lyshur did. But...

I called this the Steven Taylor Mpreg Story but that's not actually true. It's only almost.

Lyshur dies and Steven is sad because he did like them, even if he wasn't down for the seeding thing. Also, watching Malvin suffer is not fun.

So Steven is also just sort of glad to be alive and I'd say that they presumably never mention this again, but that's not true, because earlier in this book there's another short story with 1 and Steven where Steven mentions the Omwanar.

So that was definitely a Short Trip that exists.

[autisticsupervillain]

FTF: Isekai Invasion

The show where we take a character and drop them into a different franchise at a random location to see if they can conquer the world.

This Episode...

Xefros Tritoh invades Empire City!

Conditions:

Takes place in the Evil Karma Timeline of inFAMOUS 1

Scenario:

After finding the device that sent Joey to Alternia, Xefros inadvertently gets himself to to Empire City, landing smack dab in the middle of its gang war conflict.

Invader: Xefros

Return Readers are no doubt familiar with the hellish planet of Alternia. The bleeding heart of the cruel, colonizing Alternian Empire and the factor in which trollkind's children are raised to be killers. It is a brutal, uncaring world where enemy and friend mean the same thing and the corpses outnumber the houses on the streets.

How does an ordinary child survive on such a planet? How does an average person look like in Hell? Well, they don't get much more average than Xefros Tritoh.

Xefros is flat at the bottom of Alternia's hierarchy. As a rust blood with a timid demeanor and no immediately obvious combat ability, Xefros fears for his life on a nightly basis. Anyone or anything could have him killed at any time and no one would care. When the world acknowledged him at all, it was only to remind him that his life didn't matter. Even to a rebellion supposedly fighting in his interests, Xefros didn't matter. His own moirail, er, basically alien queerplatonic life partner those not in the know, doesn't treat him with the slightest respect, doubling down on squashing his self esteem at seemingly every opportunity for reasons we still don't understand. It was a miserable existence.... until he made an actual friend.

Joey Claire was a human far from home with Xefros as her only guide on this hostile alien world. With no understanding of any kind of hemospectrum or an preconceived notions of Xefros's self worth, Joey could see Xefros for who he actually was. Not as a disposable pawn or a worthless servant, but as a scared, traumatized boy who desperately needed a friend. And, now that he has one, Xefros will do anything he can to protect her.

Xefros is an entirely ordinary example of his species, yes, but he's standard for a race of galactic conquers. His strength and speed are clearly superhuman by Earth standards, such as when he survived his hive getting reduced to rubble on top of him with nothing but light bleeding. He also seems resistant to energy draining abilities, with Folykl, someone who drains the psionic and life energy of anyone she touches to keep herself alive, describing trying to drain him as like "sucking on a brick". As a rust blood, Xefros possesses weak basic telekinesis, allowing him to move small objects with great exertion, and can see and talk to ghosts. Most impressively, however, he's capable of holding his own against gold bloods.

Gold bloods are used as batteries for the Empire's fleet ships when they come of age, having their incredible psionic abilities harnessed to power the Empire's warcrafts. When reduced to this state, gold bloods are capable of supplying enough power to these sheeps to push them at near light speeds, generating an awe inspiring kinetic energy of nearly 95 Petatons of TNT. That's enough to obliterate continents, almost enough to completely raze the Earth's surface!

Source:

The gold bloods Xefros fought should be capable of this level of power. Kuprum has been actively training himself and his abilities for the sake of being as good a Helmsman as possible, while Azdaja is even stronger than him. Folykl, someone who easily feeds on Kuprum, can't even tough Azdaja because of his sheer raw power. Azdaja is powerful enough to carve up canyons, and is a dreaded assassin with hundreds of kills to his name.

Xefros could stand up to Azdaja, but ultimately couldn't win... at first. But when Joey was threatened, Xefros's latent Rage powers activated and allowed him to completely stomp Azdaja into the ground.

Rage is one of the twelve Aspects, primordial concepts that govern Homestuck's reality. As a Rage Bound, Xefros can naturally harness negative emotions to bolster himself. His abilities here remain undeveloped, as he simply doesn't have the privilege to be allowed to get angry at anything without being killed. But, seeing as Xefros has already shown to beat Goldbloods and even Purple Bloods with this power, his full potential is likely awe inspiring.

That's sorta the running theme with Xefros. His potential as a person is hampered by a society that's presumed him to be worthless. But, now that he has someone he can fight for, someone who values Xefros for Xefros, the full well of his potential as been opened. Xef just has a lot of self confrontation and soul searching to do before he gets there.

Invaded: Empire City

Empire City. One of the biggest, richest, and most populated cities in the United States. As the inFAMOUS universe's equivalent to New York, this meant it was only a matter of time until everything went wrong.

A mysterious terrorist organization called the First Sons created a device called the Ray Sphere, an explosive device that wiped out much of the city's population, unleashed a horrid plague upon the people, and, worse, gave a select few with a certain gene elemental superpowers. These "Conduits" as they came to be known took their power to the streets and took over the now quarantined city, plunging it into a gang war.

The City and its districts were split by three factions. The Reapers, former drug dealers led by a former First Sons mad scientist named Sasha. The Dust Men, a group of homeless people who turned into a cult who worshipped their leader, Alden Tate, after his fortune was stolen and he was reduced to living in the slums, and the First Sons themselves, lead by an enigmatic man named Kessler.

Sasha's gang is the weakest of the three, as its made mostly of mind controlled innocent civilians brought to heel under Sasha's mind controlling tar. Anyone doused in the substance will be brought under Sasha's command, with repeated ingestions even transforming the victims body's. Ordinary Reapers are strong enough to threaten Zeke Dunbar, who himself is strong enough to tackle open gates, survive a fall into the Hudson River from the bridge, and is fast enough to dodge automatic fire. While Reaper Conduits fully transformed by the tar are granted superhuman stature, being strong enough to survive a gas station explosion and fast enough to dodge Cole's lightning attacks briefly. Sasha's tar is potent enough to potentially control all of Empire City and can induce hallucinations in those strong enough to resist it.

The Dust Men are even more powerful, amplified by Alden's ability to turn scrap and rusty trash into giant mechanical golems to bolster his army's forces. These golems are powerful enough to blast helicopters out of the sky and strudy enough to survive a helicopters engine exploding in their face. While Alden himself may he physically frail and require a cane, he can create a giant trash behemoth capable of putting up a fight against Cole MacGrath.

And finally, the First Sons. A secret society do advanced that people abducted by them have assumed they've been kidnapped by aliens. They created and perfected the Ray Sphere device, a machine that upon detonation sucks the bio-electricity out of none Conduits and pours it into all the Conduits in range, activating their powers and amplifying their existing ones. Every gang leader in inFAMOUS 1 is, at the bare minimum, strong enough to survive the Ray Sphere explosion, which vaporized six city blocks, requiring them to tank an energy equivalent to 5.7 megatons of TNT.

Source:

Kessler spent decades planning his take over of Empire City, getting connections in Washington to keep the quarantine going while he took over. His Conduits possess the power to turn into giants and he's built flying drones that can turn invisible and shoot grenades from afar. Kessler himself possesses all of Cole MacGrath's powers from the first game, with a few additional abilities. He can punch the ground hard enough to make Earthquakes, create giant clones of himself that mind control anyone they touch, including Cole himself if he gets hit, and can teleport in invisible drones to assist him in combat.

But then there's the man himself. The Demon of Empire City. Evil Cole MacGrath. Unjustly framed for the nuking of Empire City, Cole MacGrath in this timeline became a bitter, power hungry tyrant, interest in little else than dominating Empire City like his own kingdom. His vast electrokinetic arsenal allows him to glide, control electricity as it moves at 90% light speed through wires, create forcefields that convert matter into energy, and create thunderstorms that cover all of Empire City, generating an energy equivalent to 34 megatons of TNT.

Source:

In the end, Empire City is reduced to Hell On Earth, dominated under the iron fist of Cole MacGrath, the inFAMOUS terror of Empire City.

Throwdown Breakdown:

I did this matchup because I thought it was funny how much of a stomp it was... in Xefros's favor. Let me explain.

Cole MacGrath, as the strongest guy in Empire City at this point, clocks in at around 34 megatons give or take with near light speed.

Xefros's calc scales him to 95,000,000,000 megatons and near light speed.

Xefros is literally billions of times stronger. Around 2,794,117,650x to be exact.

I've spent most of this show's lifespan hyping inFAMOUS up, so I can knock it down from time to time.

Now, Xefros doesn't solo all of inFAMOUS. He can't do a damn thing to the Beast, be that John White or Cole MacGrath, due to not having any way to kill someone who can come back from a single atom. The Second Son cast are also likely fast enough to, say, turn him into Neon particles before he can do anything.

As far as the first game goes? Xefros is resistant to energy drain, so Cole and Kessler's Bio-leech abilities are out. This just leaves Kessler and Sasha's mind control powers as the only viable win condition, as Xefros has no resistance to it. This is... circumstantial. If this takes place at the end of the game, then Kessler is dead and Sasha is being tortured by the government. If this takes place at the beginning.... Hmm.

Both characters should be roughly equal in speed and I don't see either Sasha or Kessler doing anything to activate Xefros's rage booster and getting instantly mulched. Sasha is generally smart enough to stay inside her lair, which is filled ceiling to floor with her mind controlling tar, so its not like Xefros can confront her there. That said, he's definitely strong enough to just... smash the ground the cave the whole place in on top of her. Which I could see him honestly doing. Xefros has survived by virtue of keeping his head down and out of dangerous situations, so if he can get by without actually having to fight Sasha, well.... he will.

Kessler meanwhile, is a cunning schemer. He'll take a look at the alien tanking literally everything his forces can throw at him and go "nope, not fighting that", then try to recruit the kid against The Beast. Which Xefros... would likely genuinely agree to. O mean, his friend Joey is human, so he'd definitely want to help prevent humanity from going extinct. That's kinda a win for everyone, as Kessler would certainly begin working on backup plans to take out the Beast if Xef can't manage it and keep working on Cole as a backup. Win-win? Kessler would see antagonizing Xefros by attempting to control him as an unnecessary risk, as he has no viable fallbacks if that doesn't work, so he'd try to talk him into it first.

There's this thing in Power Scaling that I just made up a name for called Writers Didn't Do The Math. It's when you take a mathematical look at a character to find that they are hilariously stronger than the narrative of the story actually treats them. See "Batman can tank a nuke" or "Fire Emblem characters can move at escape velocity". Joey Claire is supposed to be an ordinary human girl, yet she inarguably power scales to the same feat Xefros does and is, consequently, billions of times stronger than a nuke. It's a consequence of writers not understanding power scaling as a story telling device or realizing the context it creates, I suppose.

This is likely what turns people off from the community, on top of the general toxicity it produces in people who take these things to seriously, and that's entirely fair. Me personally, I view this as a feature, not a bug. When I tell you Xefros Tritoh can solo a superhero universe because he's billions of times stronger than a nuke, well... just understand that I find it really damn funny.

Tune in next time to see Greg Universe crush Senator Armstrong, I suppose.

....Actually, that's not a bad idea, someone write that down.

This Throwdown's Winner is...

Xefros Tritoh!

[actress4him]

The Shadow of Death - Attack at Dawn

This piece is one that I wrote a long time ago, back before Kamaria’s story took a different direction than I’d originally planned. This was going to be the first chapter of the fic. I just saw it again and realized it could be worth posting, regardless of the pov character not really existing anymore haha. Nothing in it goes against the new canon so it exists perfectly fine in the canon universe.

Taglist: @painful-pooch

Contains: talk of war, talk of murder, unknowing misgendering, gun mention

.

.

The Shadow of Death strikes during the night.

Wystan knows something is going on as soon as he wakes to shouting, clamoring voices. Groaning, he flips his blanket off and swings his legs over the side of the cot, rubbing a hand over his face as he stumbles to the opening of the tent. The sun has barely risen, but it’s still bright enough that he has to blink multiple times before the silhouettes scurrying around the camp are distinguishable as actual people.

“Hey.” He snatches at the sleeve of the first person that walks by close enough. “What’s going on?”

“It’s the Captain, sir.” He’s a young one, and too frazzled by whatever’s happening to realize or care that Wystan’s no sir. “He’s…dead.”

A wrinkle forms between Wystan’s eyebrows. “What? How?”

They’re in a war. Deaths happen on a near daily basis. But not in the middle of the night, in the midst of the camp. And not the man that’s been leading every other soldier here.

The private glances around and lowers his voice. “They say it was The Shadow. Slipped into his tent in the middle of the night and…” He makes a slicing motion across his throat with the side of his hand.

Everyone in this war knows about The Shadow of Death. An assassin, possibly the best that’s ever lived. No one’s ever seen his face, at least no one who has lived to tell about it. The closest anyone has ever gotten is an occasional report of a dark shadow slipping away into the night.

And of course he works for the other side. Kedosa has mercenaries, like himself, and probably even an assassin or two, but no one like The Shadow. No one else in that line of work has lasted so long, pulled off so many jobs, without being caught.

It’s Wystan’s first encounter with his work. He’ll be surprised if it’s the last.

There’s obvious turmoil going on in the general vicinity of the late Captain’s tent - the first and second lieutenants, namely, discussing something quite furiously, while multiple lower-ranking soldiers linger and gawk.

This is what they wanted, he thinks. To cause chaos, to remove the leadership and watch everyone flounder. The Captain’s absence doesn’t bother him, personally. His orders come from someone else entirely, he only has to make sure that he doesn’t get in the way of whoever is in charge here - and vice versa.

But these two need to get their act together, and soon, if they don’t want the rest of the camp panicking.

As if on cue, a scout thunders into the clearing on horseback. “Ethorcon soldiers coming! Ten minutes out!”

Ah. This is what they wanted. Attacking at dawn, when not everyone is yet up and going, is a strategic move by itself. Attacking right after killing the leader is even better.

‘Better’ from a certain perspective, of course. Not his, and not anyone else’s in this camp, that’s for sure.

To her credit, it only takes the First Lieutenant a few seconds of wide-eyed staring before she gathers herself and starts barking out orders. Gritting his teeth, Wystan turns back into his tent, slides into his boots, and snaps all of his armor into place with practiced speed. His rifle gets slung across his back, while two smaller guns strap to each hip. A cache of bullets for all of them weighs heavy on his chest.

Minutes later, he’s jogging north with a dozen other soldiers. As they pass the Captain’s tent, he can’t help but stare, wondering what kind of gruesome scene lies inside, glad that it won’t be his job to deal with it. A new officer will take the man’s place within a few days, and the First Lieutenant will be able to step back down.

It almost seems like a pointless effort, sometimes. Kill one man, another takes his place. Wipe out an entire guard, and there’s another right behind it. Years upon years of killing and dying, all for what? A tiny piece of land that no one wants to share.

Wystan isn’t one to judge, though. War is his business, and it’s a profitable one. As long as he’s the one doing the killing and not the dying, the idiots can fight over anything they want, and he’ll be there with his guns, smarts, and good looks to help.

[occult-roommates]

The landbitch

One night, Charlie got called by the landlady when she dropped the new she was raising the rent again. No, she can't do that! Where's that solidarity between people of the same species? They're both vampire after all.

Charlie: Margrit, please... Margrit: We are not on a first name basis, you will call me Misses Fairchild and nothing else. Charlie: I can't really call you misses considering you're divorced.

Well, Charlie did not help her case at all with that comeback. Great, now she gotta announce that to the other roommates.

To think she used to have pity of that woman. Her story on how she became a vampire is a bit tragic. She was born in what is now modern day Austria in 1884, exactly a century before Charlie, and moved to the States at only 20 to marry a man twice her age. To be fair, it was mostly in a gold digging move. The 1930s rolled around, and she caught him cheating on him with a woman who was born the year they got married. She threatened a divorce, and as revenge he tried killing her by hiring a vampire hitman. The hitman failed to fully suck her blood out and instead turned her into a vampire. Still alive, she got to divorce, but now the Fairchild no longer wanted anything to do with her, and her family back in Austria rejected her for being a vampire. She still had enough divorce money to buy an apartment building in the art district though, and she's been the landlady of the place ever since...Oh and all of that was for nothing, cause the old husband croaked less than a year later.

However, Margrit has long since reached a point where Charlie could no longer feel bad for her.

Charlie: Bad new folks, the rent increased again. Dawud: Are you kidding me? Rudi: Ah for fuck sake, I just got a raise at work! Dawud: Well, personally, and I'm just saying, but I am the only one here with like, a full time job that pays more than 15$ an hour. Like, I know these are though time, but you guys need to step up. Akva: Easy for you to say, you were pretty much given your job when you moved here and got trained for free. My pay is shit but I can't find anything else, and flight school is freaking expensive. Kino: You could ask your new girlfriend to move here. Akva: I don't think she would wanna do that, she has a nice apartment all to herself, unlike us who barely have enough and just forgotten what having a bit privacy is like. I mean, she's a video editor, do we even have space for her desk here? Why don't your girlfriend move here uh? Kino: I broke up with Lilah yesterday. Through text. Charlie: Kino, you can't keep breaking up with people through text! Kino: Why not? And also, we would have more place to sleep if you agreed to share your room too while all five of us plus my baby are cramped in one bedroom. Charlie: Well speaking of baby, you barely take care of him, I'm his main caregiver. Which great, not only are you not arsed to be a parent, but it's an extra financial strain on the household.

Having run out of argument, Kino simply made a random move that was similar to the C part of the YMCA dance. It seemed out of nowhere, but it was because it is the equivalent on Sixam of giving the middle finger.

Rudi: Talking a lot of shit anyway for someone who doesn't have a job. Kino: Well yes, but I'm paid by the government agent who sent me here like...an amount of money I will not disclose. Rudi: Say it! Daniele: STOP FIGHTING PLEASE I DON'T LIKE IT! Akva: Dan, shut up, you literally don't have a job and you were raised rich... Daniele: I do have one, I'm a tailor at my aunt's fashion workshop, but I don't work that often and she doesn't pay me cause we're family. Dawud: That's kind of a dick move on her part actually...Wait when we think about it, your family has well enough money that you don't need to live here, what are you even doing in this apartment? Yes, you were kicked out by your parents, but you also lived with your aunt your entire teenage years. Daniele: My family is rich but I don't have much money to my name and I wanted to leave as soon as I turn 18 but currently I'm wondering if I should not just go back... Charlie: Nobody is gonna move out of this place, we can't afford to lose anyone. If anything, we need a new member! Rudi: We clearly don't have place though, and will the landbitch even let us? Akva: Legally, every household is allowed to have a maximum of eight people, and as long as that maximum hasn't been reached, you cannot deny someone to move under a roof. However, as soon as there's eight people, you cannot accept anyone else, which is why anyone who can get pregnant needs to go on birth control if there's eight people in a household. Also, it's not because you have to allow maximum eight people that every house or apartment is made to accomodate that eight people. Dawud: ...That's messed up what the hell... Kino: Yeah, I don't wanna go on birth control against my will! Charlie: What, so you can get pregnant with another baby you won't take care of? Rudi: The idea of having an extra roommates wouldn't be so bad if you didn't had a fucking private bedroom while the rest of us plus the baby were all sharing the same room!

The roommates kept on arguing, which almost escalated into insults. "Thankfully", their next door neighbor knocked and told them to shut the fuck up, it's almost 11 pm. How was little Joseph even sleeping through that? Silly them, they shouldn't be mad at each other, clearly they should be pissed at Miss Fairchild for putting the rent so hard they need to be seven roommates to make it, and that's not even including basic stuff like food etc...But well, if getting a seven roommates is what it would take, like, they have someone of each species except a fairy so it would be the perfect opportunity to get a fairy under this roof.

And now, for totally unrelated reason, Audrey eating a burger.

Prev - Next

[starlingsrps]

dorey mason, twenty five, codebreaker

dorey is a dorothea and she was raised comfortably middle class in london by people who were on the fringes of bohemia but went straight after having their first child, jessamine. bloomsbury turned into shepherd’s bush, writing jobs turned into teaching and keeping house and as the children kept coming, the names became less bohemian. jessamine (30) was followed by caspian (29), then dorey and then finally, exhausted, jane (23).

dorey’s father, gregory, always claimed to be more of a dabbler than an actual philosopher and while catherine had ambitions of greatness, she only plays the piano for pleasure these days. by the time dorey was born, gregory had taken a job teaching at a boy’s school and catherine was keeping then all from creative murder and teaching neighborhood piano lessons.

if they’re one of the odder families on their block, dorey really never noticed until she went away for school and learned not everyone was encouraged to do what made them happy or with a copy of married life hanging around on the shelves. they’re all still a bit liberal - jessa is a costume designer for theater, cas trains horses in rural ireland, jane is studying medicine in canada, and dorey does math for both fun and a living.

she was always the studious one in her family and if her parents stopped being able to make heads or tails of her math homework before she hit puberty, they were still supportive. she won a scholarship to newnham college at cambridge and holds a double first in mathematics. technically, she doesn't have a full degree but she should never be asked about that.

by the time she finished, the war had started and as absolutely no war jobs held much appeal to her (weak ankles, too many years in a library), she started working as an assistant to a professor at the university of london and biding her time. eventually, he was recruited to the government code and cypher school and dorey was very much part of the package. there were a few frustrating weeks where she was primarily doing clerical work before being assigned to hut six as a codebreaker on army and air force engima deciphering and that’s where she’s stayed.

she’s very good at her work and takes a lot of pride in it. she’s always enjoyed puzzles and problem solving and loves the rush of being the first to crack the cipher for the day. obviously for war effort alone. only the war effort.

(being right is dorey’s very favorite thing and winning is her second)

dorey’s work takes up the lion’s share of her time and attention. it’s on a need to know basis - she’s told her family she works for the war department and she couldn’t say much more if she wanted to. she’s become a little solitary since joining bletchley, due to the nature of her work, but she does her best when she can. she can be very selfish with what little time she does have and clipped and short when she's operating on fumes.

despite all of this, she is tender deep down. she's very close to her family and stays with jessa when she's in london. she keeps a steady correspondence with cas in ireland and jane in canada and while she worries that she's doomed to be the maiden aunt, she knows that they'll always love her. she can be sweet and thoughtful and blooms with the right people. she has a good, clumsy heart and being vulnerable doesn't come easily to her - having feelings? in wartime? hideous.

(absolutely aching to be cared for over here)

BUT until the war is over: she's got work to do and that comes first always.