#he actually has a middle name but that's on a need to know basis only ｡ﾟ(ﾟ∩´﹏`∩ﾟ)ﾟ｡/ its already long enough

[jokest3r]

Low effort drawing of (buffed) Matvey's new hair ! (His former hair style was boring so I spiced it up ! I am retiring this outfit and going to make him a new one since I think this one doesn't fit him anymore/I dont think it works(Anddd a more true depiction of his actual scar. Small undetailed chibi of him and some more info about him under the cut !)

He wears a gas mask but most of my art of him has been him without it, though that it'll likely change soon with the coming art of him on his specified tag on my blog ! Why exactly he carries that briefcase around we'll never know... you will though soon, hopefully? Depends on how fast I make his final ref sheet cos he's getting a massive upgrade!

Small Info Peek: He uses his gas mask to hide his identity from his father's hired mercs and "selfishly" to hide his own face from himself since he hates looking at what he's become/hates the way he looks. His father's war leaves no exceptions, even his own family.

[randomgurl2326]

Adam Relationship Headcannons

SFW

You two met after the whole Lilith and Eve debacle

You were sent to be his Guardian Angel down in the Garden of Eden. Honestly, he couldn’t care less about Eve when he first saw you

He was in the middle of the garden, talking to Eve and then you show up… man’s whipped. Simp I tell you

(Actually wished that you were made to be his wife instead of the baddie Lilith or the goodie-two-shoes Eve)

Again. Whipped.

Now, tho is guy… whewww. He may seem incredibly misogynistic to practically everyone around him. But he can be a total sweetheart

He would—if you didn’t know how to already—teach you how to shred on the guitar

Speaking of guitars, that gold strat that he had during the battle in the last episode is only used during a special occasion (case and point, when you two have a date night or after sex)

He also serenades you every chance he gets

After dinner

After a meeting

After sex

After just walking the goddamn promenade

I also think he would be heavenly (ha! See what i did there? No? Okay…) in the kitchen. Especially for date night. Adam knows how to make the best prime rib in heaven

(Lute totally hasn’t tried to blackmail the recipe out of him)

Adam is also very insecure about how he looks under his mask

Especially after having two wives ditch him for Lucifer

He definitely needs to be praised on a daily basis, even if it seems like he’s an egotistical asshole

Every day you tell him how handsome he is and he doesn’t believe you (c’mon have you seen him fuckin’ hot)

You two sometimes don’t see each other days on end because you both work so much. You being a high-ranking Angel/seraphim and him being well… the first man on Earth

If you guys go especially long for not seeing each other, you guys hole up a few days in your shared home spending time with each other among other things…

By the way, you and Lute are best friends, probably more than her and Adam

Like, seriously, if you’re not with him, you’re with her. Gossiping or fucking around, it’s heaven, there’s infinite things to do

You two are also very lovey dovey with each other

One time Sera had cover Emily’s eyes with her wings because you two were making out and feeling each other up in the middle of the Heavenly Court Room

Despite all of his faults, he’s a good husband to you, a great one actually. And if you two were to ever have kids, he’d definitely be the dad who everyone loves

He would introduce them to rock, punk, metal.

Definitely plays his guitar to get them to sleep every night

NSFW

Okay… he want lying about being the Dick Master. He can pleasure women, that is not a problem for him

Also, it might not seem like it, but he loves going down on you. Probably one of his favorite pass times actually

I swear, this man could make you scream his name within minutes. No joke

Don’t get me wrong, he loves receiving head

But just not as much as he loves eating pussy (Lilith and Eve missed out on that one for sure)

He also has a bigger dick than average

Probably 6-7.5 inches in length and hella girthy. Uncircumcised (duh), and a vein that runs up the bottom of it

Definitely knows how to use it

Every one within a five mile radius of your guys’ house… let’s just say I feel really bad for them

No joke, he is insane about pleasuring you

This probably also feeds into his insecurity about you leaving him (you won’t)

He for sure has a praise kink. Seriously, tell him he’s a good boy and he’s unraveling under your touch instantly

His favorite position is cowgirl (what can he say, he loves powerful women)

But he’s down for whatever position you want; missionary, warrior, against a wall, whatever

Speaking of wall sex, Lute has definitely caught you two more than once

The first time she did was when you two were in Adam’s office while he was supposed to be planning the next extermination. She came to ask him a question about it and there you two were. Goin’ at it like rabbits on the wall next to his desk

She couldn’t look you guys in the eye for three weeks. It was terrible

Adam also doesn’t seem like the type of guy to have sex toys or feel the need to use them

But, again, he’s whipped. So he’s willing to do whatever you want to do

Wont admit this to anyone but you, but he likes to sub every once in a while. Especially with all the ‘first man’ stuff weighing down on him he needs a way to get away from all that stress

Despite him making crude jokes about sex, he’s a very giving partner in bed

He had to make sure you cum at least twice before he gets his dick wet

Also, have I mentioned how good he is at eating pussy? Oh, I have? Yeah, well, he is (especially with that tiny bit of stubble on his chin… gahhh)

Just needed to get it out there

All in all, Adam is a very giving person in bed, can be selfish at times but will make up for it. He loves you too much for you to feel mad or upset (especially with him)

A/N: this was my first time writing for Adam and Hazbin in general. I hope you liked it. I love you all💚💜

[mediumgayitalian]

The best part of being his own camp counsellor is that he can wake up whenever the fuck he likes.

Nico’s a fan.

Because, however, his dumb ass made friends with the camp’s head medic, he doesn’t get to sleep in as often as he would like. He is instead often woken up before the clock strikes nine, which is a tragedy and one of the forty thousand reasons he is going to be present on Will’s judgement day. (The scales tip any which way on a regular basis, but as of last week, Will is going to hell. Unfortunate. Nico’ll still visit him, though. Bring him one half of a twizzler or something.) So when he wakes up, one lovely morning, mouth tasting like something rotted in it and sun well past halfway across the sky, he is capital-C Concerned.

What a horrible tragedy that is. Finally, for the first time in months, he was able to sleep in. And his first thought is not gratitude. Solace may indeed have to die — Nico was not this way before he started planting his annoying ass front and centre in Nico’s life. He’s quite fairly certain he used to be frightening and badass. Now Will orders him to drink milk for the sake of his calcium and he does. Gods.

“Morning,” he hedges, approaching the archery range, feeling marginally more alive than twenty minutes prior.

Kayla raises an amused eyebrow. “Dude, it’s, like, two.”

“Well fuck you, then.”

She smirks. “Aw, did baby not get his Sunshine fix of the day? Is that why he’s so grumpy?”

It really sucks that Will is so fond of his siblings. Nico wonders if Will would still like him if he knew how many times he daydreams of transporting Kayla onto the moon per day.

“As soon as I figure out which god would appreciate you as a sacrifice, you’re gone.”

“Yeah, right,” she snorts, turning away and lining up an arrow. She lets it fly, watching as it shaves a splinter off a hunk of wood fifty feet away. “You couldn’t get close enough to kick my ass before I’d skewer you, di Angelo.”

Remembering the warning arrow Kayla had shot through his shoulder last week, he wisely chooses not to press the matter any further. The power visibly goes to her head. Fuck.

“Just — tell me where Will is.”

“Why?” She strings another arrow. The grin on her face is a level of shit-eating that Nico has only before seen on a Stoll. She should spend less time around Julia, or else the camp is in for some serious trouble. “What are your intentions with my dear brother?”

Nico, on principle, refuses to answer that question. Kayla shrugs, finishing her shot and then turning around to stick her tongue out at him.

“No answer, no location! Find him yourself, loverboy. And remember that I am always watching.”

Stomping away, and ignoring the smile twitching at his lips — she is so annoying, truly, gods above he owes Bianca a thousand apologies for ever opening his mouth — he heads towards the infirmary. There are only six locations Will is at any given time, after all, except when he disappears for several hours randomly but Nico doesn’t know how to bring that up yet. As he approaches the infirmary, though, he hears it absolutely blasting with music, like genuinely shaking the ground a little bit, and knows exactly where to find him.

As he approaches the door, wincing at the door, he finds it closed. Odd — Will likes a breeze when he works. Even odder is the hastily-written sign pasted onto it:

ANNUAL CLEAN OUT DAY. IF YOU NEED ME, TOUGH SHIT. IF YOU NEED A BANDAID, TOUGH SHIT. IF YOU’RE BLEEDING OUT, CALL AN AMBULANCE AND PRAY. I AM BUSY.

(‘Busy’ is underlined three times.)

In smaller print, under the all-caps monstrosity, is:

Unless you’re Nico, in which case disregard the previous sentiment. No, Cecil, this does NOT mean you.

The note is written again in Ancient Greek, Latin, Spanish, Portuguese, French, Mandarin, Italian, Polish, Korean, Morse Code, and another ten languages Nico can’t even name. Actually, wait — the top left is Klingon. And middle right note does not appear to be language, showing instead a poorly drawn stick figure in armour being shoved into a cannon and shot into the sun by another poorly drawn stick figure in a lab coat. Nico loves a man who’s multi-talented, indeed.

Hesitantly, Nico cracks open the door. He is immediately assaulted by a solid wall of sound, and then nearly bowled over by the enigma himself, William ‘I Can Restructure A Human Brain But Cannot Tie My Shoelaces’ Solace. He catches himself at the last second, and then barely manages to catch Will, grabbing him around the waist just before his head hits the floor.

“Nico!” he shouts over the music, smiling brightly. “Hi! You’re here!”

“I’m here.” He can physically feel his voice cracking, but luckily the music drowns it out. Hopefully. “Uh, what’re you doing?”

“Cleaning!” Will straightens up, although he stays within the circle of Nico’s arms. Nico tries real hard to keep his gaze firmly planted on his face and not on the hands he still has in his hips. “I do it once a year, kick everybody out and deep clean the place. Helps keep it fresh and minimize the bloodstains on the floor.”

“Ah. And the music…”

“It’s fun!” Will shouts. He gasps when the CD player skips and a new song comes on, heavy base and funky synths blasting so hard the window panes shake. “Oh my gods! I love this one!” He turns his bright grin at Nico full force, absolutely no holdbacks on the dimples or freckles, gods help him, and bows cheekily. “Can I have this dance, good sir?”

“It’s Britney Spears’ Outrageous,” Nico protests weakly.

“Yeah!”

…Very, very weakly.

“…Okay.”

Will whoops, grabbing his hands and spinning him around. Nico yelps, nearly tripping over a cot, but when he looks back up Will has his eyes closed and is shimmying not unlike a worm on a fish hook, and it’s so ridiculous that he can’t help but laugh. Will pries one eye open, grinning widely, and shimmies harder.

“You’re such a dweeb!”

“Join me in the dweebiness! Free yourself!”

Nico rolls his eyes fondly, squeezing Will’s hand, and lets himself get ridiculous. He’ll deny it if anyone asks, but it’s fun.

…And not just because Will is next to him, smile brighter than any star, dancing like a massive dork, hand clasped in his.

[cafeleningrad]

Ohtori is such a disorienting place. It's so emblematic that none of the actual needs of the people in it are met. In fact it gives answers but none actually are satisfying for anyone yet the answers are presented as only alternative. ("You have to revolutionize the world (by participating in the duels that ensure the world continues to run on the same old dynamic.)"

What system Ohtori, Akio by proxy, proposes is the idea of power over another. It's very gendered power as we learn later. Women's power exists either as extension's of a man (Nanami's high social status by virtue of being Touga's little sister), be inspired to have power by extension of a man (Wakaba), surrendering to a man (Kozue), or can be easily taken away power if a man decides that the woman had enough power (Juri,Utena). In the instance a woman has power it's also used to dominate others just like men do. (Nanami being cruel to others, to Tsuwabuki in particular, Utena treating Anthy her a puzzle piece to her princely identity.) In the end there is an idea how someone who should hold all the power should be like (the Prince), and they're given free reign. However that's not what the characters need.

Touga is entirely helpless to his paternal CSA. Akio's proposition is to become, for once, the one in charge of others so none can exploit him again. And Touga fails to see how Akio still exploits him by directing Touga, with quiet implicit imagery stressing that dynamic. What Touga would have needed was protection and a trusting family.

Nanami grew up so isolated and shamed for diverging from the norm, she is entirely dependent on external subjects and objects to define her. Either it's being defined by her relationship to Touga which is the entire basis of her social status, and her only hope for affection. Nanami can only define herself by traditional feminine and classicist means like her perceived ideal femininity, and brand-name jewelry which can easily turn on her, if external voices tell her that she should wear something. Nanami is so desperate for affection, being cared and loved for but the only language she is given is Ohtori's language of "men and women are only corresponding romantically". She can't express her need for familial proximity to Touga. The only other form of gaining adoration she knows is by violence, be it Touga's kitten, Tsuwabuki, or beating her three nameless underlings into submission.

It's not until the third arc that we learn about the Kaoru twins are in the middle of their parents separating. Their childhood is getting disrupted. Both of them are longing for time of connection and chance to hold onto each other. But Ohtori tells them that Miki can only adore Kozue as innocent and helpless. Kozue, like Nanami, gets told that her only chance to express affection to her male twin is by a sexualized, romanticized interaction. For two characters who're living through turbulent times, and need some stability in the other, twisting their chance of proximity is exactly the wrong answer.

Saionji really wants to remain friends with Touga he admires so much. (If not being in love with him.) Even more than Juri, he knows that the duel platform is just a set up, he swallows Touga's poison of "true friendship doesn't exist" again and again. The only chance of proximity to Touga is to disrespect others, demonstrate superiority over them, especially Anthy, as best proxy to a close male-male-dynamic. Saionji's only given path is to delude himself further and further.

Juri pushes so many people away because she's afraid her homosexuality will be revealed. Ohtori as a place does punish homosexuality severely, see Mikage's twisted memory, Ruka trying to converse Juri. This place convinces Juri over and over again that she's wrong for loving Shiori. But the truth is, Shiori is so much in love with Juri that she will resort to abuse her emotional power as long as it serves the purpose of Juri remaining close to her. What they would have needed is the chance to know that actually they're safe to be honest, at least to each other.

Utena is deeply grief-stricken by her parent's death. As a child the idea that everything will fade is terrifying. The only alternative she is shown is that Anthy's suffering is eternal. She wants to help. But the only path for being admired and adored is becoming a prince. The only agency to help and save others is by exercising the prince's power over someone. Akio becomes even crueler by trying to convince Utena that a girl's actual aspiration is romance (with a man). What else should she want? It also distract her from her genuine compassion for Anthy, and wishing for Anthy's happiness.

[kishibe-kisser]

Types of kisses (w/ Baizhu, Childe, Dainsleif, Thoma)

Something entirely self-serving because I'm having a funky mental health day.

Tags: Kissing, touches, slight hair pulling, neck kisses

mentions of nsfw/ more suggestive

Baizhu: Gentle kisses. Maneuvering around eachother at the pharmacy, only pausing for him to plant a soft kiss on your forehead. His hand finds the back of your neck, pulling you into him so he can kiss your face gently. It's a small, silent 'I love you' in the middle of a busy day. His gentle eyes looking at you from across the room beckoning you for another silent 'i love you'.

Slow and passionate kisses. The moment you two have an actual moment to yourselves, his hands are holding your face and making sure he has your full attention before kissing you. His lips soft and gentle against yours, you can even slightly taste some herbs on his tongue. His hands always move to your hair, toying with the tresses and tugging on them gently. If time permits it, he'll tug your top down to expose your shoulder and kiss down the skin to leave marks for only him to find.

Childe/Tartaglia: Playful kisses. He's the type to cover your eyes and have you guess who's behind you. It's always him and you know that but you like to play along and sometimes for shits and giggles you answer with someone else's name. When he shakes his head disapprovingly, he'll peck your lips sweetly. Other than that, he likes peppering your face in kisses as he tickles you and makes you laugh. Your laughter is his favorite thing in the whole world, so on a day to day basis he just keeps the affection light and sweet.

Playful kisses don't just stay wholesome, chasing you to the bedroom with laugh before pinning you to the wall. He likes making things a game up until he catches you. His smile turns slightly sinister before kissing you deeply, thigh wedging between your legs as he pulls your hair to expose your neck.

Dainsleif: Goodbye kisses. When you're out and about, it'll be a miracle if he pulls you to the side for a kiss. It's incredibly rare. With all he's been through, the worst fear in his life is losing more people he loves. So when you are about to go your seperate ways for whatever, he pulls you to the side and looks you in your eyes. His hands holding your face and stroking the skin before telling you to be safe and kissing your forehead/lips/cheek. He also likes to remind you that if you need him, he'll be right there.

Feverish kisses. When he needs you, he absolutely needs you. Kissing you like his life force depends on it. Walking you backwards and pressing you into the nearest surface. Every emotion he has is put into kissing you, savouring you. His hands map out your body to make sure he never forgets a single curve or bump.

Thoma: Sneaky kisses. Thoma loves to steal a kiss while he's working, pulling you to the side behind a corner to kiss your lips quickly and then get back to work. The kisses leave him giddy the rest of the day and the more he manages to steal from you, the more he can't stop smiling. He thinks it's just so fun to do almost like it's a game to see if you can kiss without getting caught.

Gentle kisses. In contrast to how he is around others. When it's just the two of you, he treats you like glass. Not kissing you too roughly to show you how much he cherishes you. He smiles alot inbetween kisses, pausing to look at you only to smile even more. He kisses down your body with the same energy, taking time to make sure you feel cherished.

A/N: Just wanted to write something for me! Will work on the new requests I received now, I had a busy week.

[poppitron360]

Wait. I wanna hear you Will Solace headcanons

Okay so be prepared for these to be wildly inaccurate because all I know about this guy is from fannon. Most of this is also me projecting.

1. Bass player. Yes that is 100% biased, as I am also a bass player (and I hc myself as a legacy of Apollo). No I have no basis on this claim other than Basses Are Just Cooler Than Guitars.

2. OR he’s the guitarist, Nico is the Bassist.

3. If there is a piano in the house, he WILL play it. For hours. Gods forbid you take him anywhere with a public piano.

4. Hates learning Music Theory, learns by ear and by feel. As an Apollo kid, he can instantly read both tab and sheet music, but uses neither.

5. Also has perfect pitch (can name any chord just by hearing it).

6. He’s a Star Wars fan, right? Can talk for hours about John William’s use of Lydian Mode in the score to convey a sense of majesty, and don’t get him started on the expert use of Vagnarian methods of leitmotif-

7. Okay, so maybe he knows a little music theory.

8. Writes terrible poetry that’s low-key kinda good.

9. Founder of the chb LGBTQ+ club.

10. Bisexual flags everywhere. He always at least one pink, purple, and blue pen on hand, doodles exclusively in those colours. His doctors notes are colour-coded pink, purple, blue.

11. BIG supporter of Trans rights- is qualified to help with Gender Affirming Healthcare for anyone at Camp.

12. Apollo is also god of prophecies. Will has the power of foresight ONLY for TV show/Film/Book endings. He is able to predict how a character would die with incredible accuracy after one episode. Morbid as fuck, so naturally Nico thinks it’s the hottest thing ever.

13. SWIFTIE!!!!!

14. Friendship bracelets. VERY swiftie-coded, he has a million of them on both arms, cutting off his circulation.

15. Paints Nico’s nails. Nico insists on all black, but gave in and let Will paint ONE nail fun colours, bedazzled with charms and shit. As long as it’s the middle finger.

Now, specifically my Will x Leo (Platonic) headcannons:

16. Will and Leo become very close at camp simply because Leo has absolutely zero sense of self-preservation. Like that kid does not value his life in any way at all, and so always ends up doing the most reckless shit ever, and, naturally, ends up spending a lot of time in the infirmary, usually only after being dragged there by Jason (“What’s the big deal? It’s just a broken arm. I’m ambidextrous! Besides, I’ve survived worse.”)

17. Will loves him because he’s never there longer than he has to be.

18. Except sometimes he does have to force Leo back into bed while Leo’s yelling loudly about how he needs to get back to his work, the Argo II won’t build itself, and to let go of him or he’ll burn you.

19. Will makes him wear enchanted plasters (band aids) that he can’t take off without doctor’s permission, to stop him absent-mindedly picking at old scabs and bits of skin. He also keeps fidget toys and stress balls to give to his patients. Leo has stolen ALL of them.

20. Like seriously, it is a problem. Leo has had to make them a whole bunch more fidgets because he’s taken and then overworked them until they all broke.

21. Both their southern accents come out more when they talk to each other. If a conversation goes on too long, they evolve into using so much fast-paced Texan slang that no-one else can understand them- it’s practically its own language.

22. BOTH SWIFTIES!!!!!

23. Leo helps out in the infirmary a lot- he’s useful if you need to sterilise equipment or cauterise any wounds.

24. It works sort of like an exchange of favours, where Leo also calls on Will anytime he needs a human flashlight to work on a project.

25. Leo has a lot of scars from his rough childhood. Will is one of the few people (aside from Jason) who’s actually seen them all. They never talk about it, and, as his doctor, he’s sworn to secrecy, but some of them are really disturbing. It will never not shock him that demigods can get hurt by things in the mortal world.

26. Leo makes sure Will uses accurate engineering jargon when writing Star Wars fanfiction.

27. Aside from Leo, Nico is the only one who reads his fanfiction

[the-banana-splits-blog]

2 banana

Introducing the gorillatan on the drums, Bingo B. Grey

Any post with the tag The Gorillatan on the drums (Bingo) will have Bingo on them

Below is his info post on the blog.

Bingo is a very energetic and mischievous gorillatan, if there is some kind of problem, he most likely caused it.. but besides that, he is a pretty sweet guy and just a big teddy bear. He is quite strong, but never really wants to hurt anyone, but he seems to be the most protective of the gang if they run into trouble.. well, most of the time. You can mostly find this gorillatan reading comic books or stealing sweets and stuff (mostly goes after any baked goods Snorky had made)

Since retiring from the show, he hasn’t changed much. Still as mischievous as ever and has no plans on stopping. Though he does sometimes give the gang a break from his shenanigans every now and then and goes to his parents place for a bit to catch up. (He lives kind of far from his parents and siblings)

Bingo is currently 29 years old

Personality:

A big time prankster, very happy go lucky and rarely anything other than happy (if Bingo is sad, it would most likely be something serious), very energetic, a bit too much energy.. quite protective, 100% a goofball, but will be serious if needed.

Little Facts:

Bingo is the main interpreter for Snorky, while the gang knows some of the honk Language, Bingo is quite skilled in it

Bingo’s bedroom is customized with many handlebars and rings on the ceiling as it’s his way to burn some energy while swinging around his room. Speaking of his room, Bingo is the only one that doesn’t sleep in a normal bed, he sleeps in a hammock and surprisingly, his room it pretty clean.

As you know, Bingo rarely loses his smile, but if ya get him angry then he can lose that smile. (The two things that make him the most angry? Messing with someone he cares about or messing up his banana buggie)

Bingo has a fear of tight spaces (you can thank a certain older brother of his)

Bingo is actually the strongest, but he gives the title of strongest banana to Snorky (he don’t like to hurt people anyway)

He has a huge appetite, he can eat a lot.. has been banned from quite a few all you can eat buffets

This gorillatan is prone to danger, he seems to get hurt a lot but always bounces back rather quickly. Out of everything he’s been through, he only has one scar.. that being on his chest, somewhat near his heart.

Relationships with the gang:

Fleegle- he has known Fleegle the longest and were (still are) best buddies, Bingo does consider Fleegle a brother in a way despite already having plenty of brothers. Nowadays, Fleegle is clearly tired of all of the pranks and stupid things Bingo does on a daily basis, but occasionally, he’ll get a smile out of that beagle.

Drooper- him and Drooper do consider each other friends, but they do have their ups and downs. As teens, they never got along, it was always Fleegle trying to separate the two so a fight doesn’t start. Nowadays, they are friends but do get irritated at one another if they spent too much time with each other.. of course with Drooper’s mindset today, he normally runs away from Bingo if he irritated him a bit too much…

Snorky- Bingo and Snorky are quite close, he is the whole reason Snorky even joined the band. Bingo was the first to learn the honk language and Snorky was over joyed when someone that wasn’t in his family could understand him. Their relationship can be a bit confusing from time to time as Bingo likes being a pest to him, teasing him and stealing things Snorky bakes and it all normally ends up with Bingo thrown by the little elephant, but at the end of they day, they are as happy as they can be and have no harsh feelings towards each other

Family:

Bingo is the middle child of 13 siblings. Out of all his siblings there is only one girl, her name is June and she is also the oldest. Bingo does in fact have a twin brother, his name is Dingo. They look nearly identical, but the main differences is that Dingo is calmer, has a different voice and does not have 2 different colored eyes. There is also 2 more sets of twins and one set of triplets in this big gorillatan family.

Bingo’s mama is Bethany Grey, a laid back, calm, and very loving orangutan. She has a big heart for all her children and is very protective over them no matter how big they are. Bethany doesn’t have a favorite, but she does say that Bingo has always been the most unique one out of them all. Bethany seems to always be sleepy even though she takes a lot of naps, she just says that’s how she looks.

Bingo’s pops is Charles Grey, a monotone and stern gorilla. He doesn’t speak much nor does he make a lot of expressions, but he loves all his kids greatly and has been as gentle with them as he can. He isn’t as social as Bethany, but he tries to be there for his many kids, but it is a bit hard for him. Same with Bethany, he doesn’t pick favorites, but he did think that Bingo would make a name for himself one day with his unique personality and he was right about that, he is quite proud of Bingo.. even if the gorillatan gets a bit too much for him.

[dolphin1812]

This shouldn’t be as funny as it is:

“Fauchelevent had expected anything but this, that a grave-digger could die. It is true, nevertheless, that grave-diggers do die themselves. By dint of excavating graves for other people, one hollows out one’s own.  [ . . . . ]

“Father Mestienne is the grave-digger.”

“After Napoleon, Louis XVIII. After Mestienne, Gribier. Peasant, my name is Gribier.””

“Grave-diggers can also die” is a wild plot twist, especially since Hugo portrays it as a shocking fact. And Gribier’s matter-of-fact attitude (and his listing of political events, as if all of this is just “natural” turnover) is humorous in a dark way.

Gribier himself is fascinating. The fact that he has to provide for seven children links him to Jean Valjean, who had to care for the same number of children before his imprisonment. His need to work, then, is desperate, as we know just how hard it is to provide for so many. Avoiding drinking is one way of saving money, but it also speaks to the deprivation of small enjoyments for the poor. Drinking isn’t just a pleasure in itself, but a major way of socializing, as Fauchelevent notes here; by not accepting drinks, Gribier is not only dodging an expense, but a chance to get to know his coworker, one of the few people he has a chance at bonding with in a life dominated by work. Of course, this expense isn’t just hard on him. Fauchelevent is also nervous about the idea of paying for drinks, highlighting his own financial struggles. But Gribier is also even worse off, working two jobs and still having this worry. It’s notable that his jobs mean he literally works day and night: he writes by day and digs by night, not having any real time to rest. The extent to which he can keep this up is debatable. He doesn’t complain of the hours, but he does say that digging is ruining his hand, which he needs to write. He’ll ultimately be forced to choose, losing the funds of one job and likely his dream of writing. Work has consumed his life because he has no alternative if he wants to feed seven children, just as it had taken over Valjean’s existence.

Although the parallel to Jean Valjean is more blatantly referenced through the number, Gribier bears an even closer resemblance to an early Fauchelevent. When we first encountered him, Fauchelevent had just fallen on hard times, losing all the relative comfort he’d had as a notary but maintaining a sense of pride and superiority from that status. Gribier is certainly poor if he works all day and all night, but he also specifically came from an educated class (having studied even more than Fauchelevent). He’s fully literate, speaking of the examinations he’s passed; how he was destined for a career in literature; using words Fauchelevent can’t understand; and referencing philosophy in the middle of their conversation. His contempt for Fauchelevent also links to a rural-urban divide, with him addressing him as a “peasant” and a “rustic” to stress the differences between him, an educated Parisian, and the convent gardener from the countryside. His pride is even more extreme than Fauchelevent’s was, although he doesn’t necessarily have a specific target for his bitterness at his loss of status (unlike Fauchelevent with Father Madeleine). Gribier is doubly dangerous, then. On the one hand, his poverty keeps him from building ties with people that could ultimately create a system of support for him and bring him closer to others. On the other, he rejects these ties on the basis of his past status. He can’t feel solidarity for Fauchelevent if he feels superior to him, and while he does address him as “colleague,” he largely seems to look down on him.

This parallel is particularly interesting given that Fauchelevent is depicted the way Valjean typically is in this chapter. We see him as an outsider would, only being told who he is later on. We may know that Fauchelevent actually has quite a bit in common with Gribier, even if they differ because of their origins (city vs countryside) and the extent to which they rose and fell class-wise. But Gribier only sees that image from the beginning of the chapter: an elderly worker limping behind a hearse. 

[transhawks]

I have brainrot in the middle of the night, what name do you think Hawks has on his citizenship? I re-read chapter 299 and Tomie's home named by Ukai, which I assume her maiden name, but Dabi still called Hawks Takami Keigo. Hawks also said that by erasing Takami name he severed his bond with his mother, meaning that he didn't follow her mother's surname. The thing is, I don't think Thief Takami in hiding would register his unwanted son with Takami name, so before Thief was captured highly possible that Hawks is an unregistered kid, especially since he was forbidden to go outside at all. He could go by false name, but that doesn't explain why he didn't just use his false name on public and why Dabi can track Tomie. And since he never went to school before HPSC unlike Lady Nagant, he was never in situation where he needed to put his name on non-HPSC record. At this point, I even assumed that Hawks didn't have citizenship, just HPSC's hero license, and Dabi tracked Tomie by looking at where Hawks' money income went to. Which is suck because if that's the case legally he can't apply for any other job except hero, so if post-canon he was fired/retired from being a hero, it will be difficult for him to get a job without citizenship and school certificates.

(Am I overthinking things? This brain cannot stop the Hawks angst train)

So, let's talk about registries. Japanese citizenship is complex because it runs on the koseki system. Meaning Japanese people have to register births themselves in the personal family register and then notify the government of changes.

Usually translated as household or family register, it constitutes the most important document for Japanese citizens. It is the only proof of Japanese nationality and the basis for all other forms of documentation in Japan. Contrary to most other countries, the fundamental unit of the register is the family, rather than the individual. It serves as proof of kinship ties: marriages, divorces, births, adoptions are all registered on the koseki. 

There's one thing - we don't know if Ukai is her maiden name. It might be a fake name, actually, even if she kept Tomie. This will have a lot of complications, we can talk about that later.

I agree that Hawks was probably not a registered kid until the HPSC found him. Let's see what that means:

Those who through no fault of their own find themselves with no koseki registration are in essence denied their rights as Japanese citizens.  Koseki registration is limited to Japanese citizens. (Marriages to non-Japanese spouses are recorded as marginal notations but not officially registered.) This means that anyone with such a registration can easily prove that he or she is of Japanese parentage and therefore entitled to all the rights of a Japanese citizen.  Koseki registration is not, strictly speaking, a requirement for citizenship; anyone born in Japan to either a Japanese mother or a Japanese father may claim Japanese nationality. That said, establishing proof of parentage can be exceedingly difficult if one is not registered on a parent’s koseki.

The upshot is that in Japan, without proof of koseki registration (either an official copy of the document or an official extract)—one cannot obtain a passport so as to travel abroad, be legally married, or claim one’s legal rights as an heir. In essence, one is deprived of one’s rights as a citizen.

The unit of registration in this system is not the individual but the nuclear family, with each family registered under a single surname. Under Japanese law, the husband and wife must take the same surname, and in 96% of cases, they take the husband’s. Thus, in actual practice, the koseki is the husband’s, with the wife and children added on as household members.

So right off the bat there's several issues. One, if he wasn't registered, he essentially has no passport. Either they registered him with the Takami koseki or faked it OR hero licenses are now a fundamental replacement for a passport (interesting to think about). It also uhh might speak to how much control they have over him. Two, Tomie and Keigo would have been under Thief's koseki and registered with him as a family unit if registered at all. Unlikely, dude was on the run. What I think might have actually happened is the HPSC did register Keigo with his father's koseki, because I think it might have made it easier to deal with legalities, but then classified it and made sure no one can really look up the Takami family register. Tomie was likely kept off it and has no legal link to Keigo or Thief. Essentially the "protection" from Thief's legacy was given to Tomie first and foremost but required her cutting off all links to her son too. Something to understand that women are essentially are in their parents' registry unless they get married - then they are in their husband's registery. And then the Koseki itself can only list two current generations. So it can only list a nuclear family of a father mother and their children. If Ukai is her family name, her actual name, then she's likely on her parent's koseki. Even if they are deceased.

Two, until recently, illegitimacy was listed on koseki. No, really, and I think it's still registered on the birth notice itself. And it gives a lot of stigma. Did you know there's no joint custody in Japan? That's important - it's seen as all or nothing, and the non custodial parent is discouraged from interacting with the kid and the mother? Why? Because (in the presumption it's the mother who got custody which it usually is) a divorced father in the life of a mother and kid discourages the mother to find a new spouse. No, really, the system and courts have that in mind. Okay, let's go back to Tomie. The HPSC are promising her a new start, disconnected from Takami thief? You know what would show up in her koseki if she had Keigo on it? The fact she had a kid out of wedlock. That would follow both of them forever since she didn't have a husband listed.

That's not a fresh start. She got to walk off, essentially. Then, with Thief likely in prison for decades if not life, the HSPC just registered Keigo in his koseki, likely putting some placeholder for his mom, and then laws for koseki would make it hard for just anyone to access the Takami one. In this way, they managed to get around the issues of him being Mukosekisha (Unregistered) which would fuck up his citizenship rights.

That's what I think happened. However if he doesn't have citizenship and the hero license functions as a passport that let him leave Japan, yeah he's fucked. It's the one job he can do because the HPSC just did his paperwork. He can't get state aid (Mukosekisha can't get welfare), his employment is limited...

Interesting how bureaucracy can genuinely turn a person's life into a nightmare.

[cringecompanionapologist]

Making History AKA The Steven Taylor Mpreg Story

So there's this Short Trip. And I read it. I'ma talk about it.

So, there's this diplomat named Robert Simmons who's supposed to sign a peace treaty with some poisonous jellyfish people called the Omwanar. The story begins with a passage from a future history book about it. The humans and Omwanar were at war for Reasons (the book isn't even sure) and Simmons is here to put a stop to it.

Well, he would be, if he wasn't dead. Despite being in perfect health, he randomly died of a heart attack right before he was supposed to meet up with Omwanar ambassador. Two other guys, Harlow and Malvin, are trying to figure out what to do now. The TARDIS just happens to land in the middle of this.

Malvin is very "let's just keep being at war" while Harlow is open to the idea of an actual plan, which the Doctor has. The Omwanar don't know what Simmons looks like, so they could easily pass anyone off as him. The Doctor volunteers Steven for this.

The Doctor talks about his past experience dealing with hostile aliens and it's funny because he gives some really bad examples:

The Zarbi in The Web Planet were basically animals who were only hostile because of evil mind control. The Rills in Galaxy 4 look ugly and scary but are actually really nice because Galaxy 4 is a "don't judge a book by its cover" fable for children. The Sensorites didn't trust the humans but only one of them was hostile. The rest were just anxious and indecisive.

Steven then mentions the Daleks, who actually are hostile, far more than the Omwanar could possibly be, since a Dalek would never sign a peace treaty. Still, Steven is better at listing hostile alien continuity references than the Doctor is.

So Steven pretends to be Robert Simmons and Malvin continues to go apeshit over how doomed they all are. But, it actually goes pretty well. Thanks to the TARDIS translation circuits, Steven can understand the ambassador, Lyshur Lysus, without a translator making things difficult, and that immediately gains Lyshur's respect.

They talk for a bit, and end up on first name basis, with Steven, pretending to be a Robert, going by Bob, and it becomes really obvious that Lyshur really likes "Bob". Leading to:

Steven has to find a way to politely decline while the Doctor decides to examine the body of real Simmons and finds out he was poisoned with Omwanar venom. He quickly figures out that the murderer was Malvin, trying to frame the Omwanar to keep the war going to give humanity a reason to wipe the Omwanar out.

Lyshur further explains the "seeding" thing: The baby Omwanar will have fresh meat to eat when they are born. So this is more of an Alien Chest Burster sort of situation. If Steven were to accept he would die, so it's not the mpreg that really upsets him here.

But, before the situation can be sorted out, with Lyshur needing to lay those eggs right the fuck now, Malvin runs in and starts shooting. Lyshur is hit, Steven tries to protect them, there's a scuffle, and Lyshur seems to sort of temporarily absorb both Steven and Malvin into their jellyfish body for a second.

When it's over, Lyshur is dying. It's not from being shot. It turns out that Omwanar die after laying eggs. Which Lyshur did. But...

I called this the Steven Taylor Mpreg Story but that's not actually true. It's only almost.

Lyshur dies and Steven is sad because he did like them, even if he wasn't down for the seeding thing. Also, watching Malvin suffer is not fun.

So Steven is also just sort of glad to be alive and I'd say that they presumably never mention this again, but that's not true, because earlier in this book there's another short story with 1 and Steven where Steven mentions the Omwanar.

So that was definitely a Short Trip that exists.

[autisticsupervillain]

FTF: Isekai Invasion

The show where we take a character and drop them into a different franchise at a random location to see if they can conquer the world.

This Episode...

Xefros Tritoh invades Empire City!

Conditions:

Takes place in the Evil Karma Timeline of inFAMOUS 1

Scenario:

After finding the device that sent Joey to Alternia, Xefros inadvertently gets himself to to Empire City, landing smack dab in the middle of its gang war conflict.

Invader: Xefros

Return Readers are no doubt familiar with the hellish planet of Alternia. The bleeding heart of the cruel, colonizing Alternian Empire and the factor in which trollkind's children are raised to be killers. It is a brutal, uncaring world where enemy and friend mean the same thing and the corpses outnumber the houses on the streets.

How does an ordinary child survive on such a planet? How does an average person look like in Hell? Well, they don't get much more average than Xefros Tritoh.

Xefros is flat at the bottom of Alternia's hierarchy. As a rust blood with a timid demeanor and no immediately obvious combat ability, Xefros fears for his life on a nightly basis. Anyone or anything could have him killed at any time and no one would care. When the world acknowledged him at all, it was only to remind him that his life didn't matter. Even to a rebellion supposedly fighting in his interests, Xefros didn't matter. His own moirail, er, basically alien queerplatonic life partner those not in the know, doesn't treat him with the slightest respect, doubling down on squashing his self esteem at seemingly every opportunity for reasons we still don't understand. It was a miserable existence.... until he made an actual friend.

Joey Claire was a human far from home with Xefros as her only guide on this hostile alien world. With no understanding of any kind of hemospectrum or an preconceived notions of Xefros's self worth, Joey could see Xefros for who he actually was. Not as a disposable pawn or a worthless servant, but as a scared, traumatized boy who desperately needed a friend. And, now that he has one, Xefros will do anything he can to protect her.

Xefros is an entirely ordinary example of his species, yes, but he's standard for a race of galactic conquers. His strength and speed are clearly superhuman by Earth standards, such as when he survived his hive getting reduced to rubble on top of him with nothing but light bleeding. He also seems resistant to energy draining abilities, with Folykl, someone who drains the psionic and life energy of anyone she touches to keep herself alive, describing trying to drain him as like "sucking on a brick". As a rust blood, Xefros possesses weak basic telekinesis, allowing him to move small objects with great exertion, and can see and talk to ghosts. Most impressively, however, he's capable of holding his own against gold bloods.

Gold bloods are used as batteries for the Empire's fleet ships when they come of age, having their incredible psionic abilities harnessed to power the Empire's warcrafts. When reduced to this state, gold bloods are capable of supplying enough power to these sheeps to push them at near light speeds, generating an awe inspiring kinetic energy of nearly 95 Petatons of TNT. That's enough to obliterate continents, almost enough to completely raze the Earth's surface!

Source:

The gold bloods Xefros fought should be capable of this level of power. Kuprum has been actively training himself and his abilities for the sake of being as good a Helmsman as possible, while Azdaja is even stronger than him. Folykl, someone who easily feeds on Kuprum, can't even tough Azdaja because of his sheer raw power. Azdaja is powerful enough to carve up canyons, and is a dreaded assassin with hundreds of kills to his name.

Xefros could stand up to Azdaja, but ultimately couldn't win... at first. But when Joey was threatened, Xefros's latent Rage powers activated and allowed him to completely stomp Azdaja into the ground.

Rage is one of the twelve Aspects, primordial concepts that govern Homestuck's reality. As a Rage Bound, Xefros can naturally harness negative emotions to bolster himself. His abilities here remain undeveloped, as he simply doesn't have the privilege to be allowed to get angry at anything without being killed. But, seeing as Xefros has already shown to beat Goldbloods and even Purple Bloods with this power, his full potential is likely awe inspiring.

That's sorta the running theme with Xefros. His potential as a person is hampered by a society that's presumed him to be worthless. But, now that he has someone he can fight for, someone who values Xefros for Xefros, the full well of his potential as been opened. Xef just has a lot of self confrontation and soul searching to do before he gets there.

Invaded: Empire City

Empire City. One of the biggest, richest, and most populated cities in the United States. As the inFAMOUS universe's equivalent to New York, this meant it was only a matter of time until everything went wrong.

A mysterious terrorist organization called the First Sons created a device called the Ray Sphere, an explosive device that wiped out much of the city's population, unleashed a horrid plague upon the people, and, worse, gave a select few with a certain gene elemental superpowers. These "Conduits" as they came to be known took their power to the streets and took over the now quarantined city, plunging it into a gang war.

The City and its districts were split by three factions. The Reapers, former drug dealers led by a former First Sons mad scientist named Sasha. The Dust Men, a group of homeless people who turned into a cult who worshipped their leader, Alden Tate, after his fortune was stolen and he was reduced to living in the slums, and the First Sons themselves, lead by an enigmatic man named Kessler.

Sasha's gang is the weakest of the three, as its made mostly of mind controlled innocent civilians brought to heel under Sasha's mind controlling tar. Anyone doused in the substance will be brought under Sasha's command, with repeated ingestions even transforming the victims body's. Ordinary Reapers are strong enough to threaten Zeke Dunbar, who himself is strong enough to tackle open gates, survive a fall into the Hudson River from the bridge, and is fast enough to dodge automatic fire. While Reaper Conduits fully transformed by the tar are granted superhuman stature, being strong enough to survive a gas station explosion and fast enough to dodge Cole's lightning attacks briefly. Sasha's tar is potent enough to potentially control all of Empire City and can induce hallucinations in those strong enough to resist it.

The Dust Men are even more powerful, amplified by Alden's ability to turn scrap and rusty trash into giant mechanical golems to bolster his army's forces. These golems are powerful enough to blast helicopters out of the sky and strudy enough to survive a helicopters engine exploding in their face. While Alden himself may he physically frail and require a cane, he can create a giant trash behemoth capable of putting up a fight against Cole MacGrath.

And finally, the First Sons. A secret society do advanced that people abducted by them have assumed they've been kidnapped by aliens. They created and perfected the Ray Sphere device, a machine that upon detonation sucks the bio-electricity out of none Conduits and pours it into all the Conduits in range, activating their powers and amplifying their existing ones. Every gang leader in inFAMOUS 1 is, at the bare minimum, strong enough to survive the Ray Sphere explosion, which vaporized six city blocks, requiring them to tank an energy equivalent to 5.7 megatons of TNT.

Source:

Kessler spent decades planning his take over of Empire City, getting connections in Washington to keep the quarantine going while he took over. His Conduits possess the power to turn into giants and he's built flying drones that can turn invisible and shoot grenades from afar. Kessler himself possesses all of Cole MacGrath's powers from the first game, with a few additional abilities. He can punch the ground hard enough to make Earthquakes, create giant clones of himself that mind control anyone they touch, including Cole himself if he gets hit, and can teleport in invisible drones to assist him in combat.

But then there's the man himself. The Demon of Empire City. Evil Cole MacGrath. Unjustly framed for the nuking of Empire City, Cole MacGrath in this timeline became a bitter, power hungry tyrant, interest in little else than dominating Empire City like his own kingdom. His vast electrokinetic arsenal allows him to glide, control electricity as it moves at 90% light speed through wires, create forcefields that convert matter into energy, and create thunderstorms that cover all of Empire City, generating an energy equivalent to 34 megatons of TNT.

Source:

In the end, Empire City is reduced to Hell On Earth, dominated under the iron fist of Cole MacGrath, the inFAMOUS terror of Empire City.

Throwdown Breakdown:

I did this matchup because I thought it was funny how much of a stomp it was... in Xefros's favor. Let me explain.

Cole MacGrath, as the strongest guy in Empire City at this point, clocks in at around 34 megatons give or take with near light speed.

Xefros's calc scales him to 95,000,000,000 megatons and near light speed.

Xefros is literally billions of times stronger. Around 2,794,117,650x to be exact.

I've spent most of this show's lifespan hyping inFAMOUS up, so I can knock it down from time to time.

Now, Xefros doesn't solo all of inFAMOUS. He can't do a damn thing to the Beast, be that John White or Cole MacGrath, due to not having any way to kill someone who can come back from a single atom. The Second Son cast are also likely fast enough to, say, turn him into Neon particles before he can do anything.

As far as the first game goes? Xefros is resistant to energy drain, so Cole and Kessler's Bio-leech abilities are out. This just leaves Kessler and Sasha's mind control powers as the only viable win condition, as Xefros has no resistance to it. This is... circumstantial. If this takes place at the end of the game, then Kessler is dead and Sasha is being tortured by the government. If this takes place at the beginning.... Hmm.

Both characters should be roughly equal in speed and I don't see either Sasha or Kessler doing anything to activate Xefros's rage booster and getting instantly mulched. Sasha is generally smart enough to stay inside her lair, which is filled ceiling to floor with her mind controlling tar, so its not like Xefros can confront her there. That said, he's definitely strong enough to just... smash the ground the cave the whole place in on top of her. Which I could see him honestly doing. Xefros has survived by virtue of keeping his head down and out of dangerous situations, so if he can get by without actually having to fight Sasha, well.... he will.

Kessler meanwhile, is a cunning schemer. He'll take a look at the alien tanking literally everything his forces can throw at him and go "nope, not fighting that", then try to recruit the kid against The Beast. Which Xefros... would likely genuinely agree to. O mean, his friend Joey is human, so he'd definitely want to help prevent humanity from going extinct. That's kinda a win for everyone, as Kessler would certainly begin working on backup plans to take out the Beast if Xef can't manage it and keep working on Cole as a backup. Win-win? Kessler would see antagonizing Xefros by attempting to control him as an unnecessary risk, as he has no viable fallbacks if that doesn't work, so he'd try to talk him into it first.

There's this thing in Power Scaling that I just made up a name for called Writers Didn't Do The Math. It's when you take a mathematical look at a character to find that they are hilariously stronger than the narrative of the story actually treats them. See "Batman can tank a nuke" or "Fire Emblem characters can move at escape velocity". Joey Claire is supposed to be an ordinary human girl, yet she inarguably power scales to the same feat Xefros does and is, consequently, billions of times stronger than a nuke. It's a consequence of writers not understanding power scaling as a story telling device or realizing the context it creates, I suppose.

This is likely what turns people off from the community, on top of the general toxicity it produces in people who take these things to seriously, and that's entirely fair. Me personally, I view this as a feature, not a bug. When I tell you Xefros Tritoh can solo a superhero universe because he's billions of times stronger than a nuke, well... just understand that I find it really damn funny.

Tune in next time to see Greg Universe crush Senator Armstrong, I suppose.

....Actually, that's not a bad idea, someone write that down.

This Throwdown's Winner is...

Xefros Tritoh!

[marlasomething]

Fervid as a  Flame, does it have  a name? (Bugborg Week - June 12)

Summary: Nebula has been developing feelings towards Mantis. However, luckily (or not) for her, the chances to actually process them has never come...until, perhaps, their first Earth Pride Parade.

Relationships: Nebula/Mantis

A/N: Written for day 1 of @bugborgweek2023

Prompt: Pride

Word count: 2316

CW: mentions of LGTBphobia, mentions of death, hints of alcoholism, swearing, emotional trauma

Also on AO3!

For a little while, Nebula was almost completely alone; the rivalry with her sister Gamora being the only thing that kept her apart from total soul-self-annihilation. Then, this group of everything but heroes (including Gamora herself) reluctantly became her family, and she had a home for the first time since she could remember. Later on, the father that had pushed her to become the monster she was certain she could never stop being (not completely, at least) had made sure almost of said family was completely gone, disappearing into literal thin air. She had been left behind with only Rocket, and she didn’t know what she would have done if he had been gone too. What she would have become.

In that time frame, she had also become good friends with Tony Stark, named among other Earthlings as Iron Man (which, from her cyborg perspective, was kind of a bit offensive, but she had bigger fish to fry than to get offended by that particular point). When she had regained her family of strays, it had been at the cost of her new friend’s life, and a Gamora with whom she had to rebuild every single bond they had ever managed to accomplish.

She was starting to think the Universe simply hated her. This was further proved when she realised her stomach acted out all the time she was around Mantis. The younger of the two remaining Children of Ego was annoying in her quirkiness and constantly tried to see the best on people, while still always being on point when reading all the shitty things that went through Nebula’s mind on an almost daily basis.

She hated what a comforting presence she was, without even having to use her abilities. How she was one of the very few people that stood up against her when her nerves got the best of her. Mantis could make her laugh, but also get so serious she was ever so slightly intimidated by the insect-aligned extra-terrestrial.

So, of course, by the time she started to realise that, maybe (and only maybe), her stomach-ache wasn’t actually a bad thing…she had to go.

To find her fucking self, figures!

Deep inside, she understood why she needed to walk the universe alone, but she was on her right to be selfish and be mad that she had left her behind, so inner-actualy-outer-mad that if had surfaced enough for Drax to deduce she had love problems . She would not call it love , but there was a certain infatuation she had grown tired of denying, but only to her deeper self. One day, of course, she hoped she could resolve all these feelings she was trying to hard to silence even from herself.

One day, but not today.

Nor any other day soon without someone forcing it out of her.

 It was about mid of June on Earth when they got a stress call from Quill. Peter communicated with them regularly (especially with Rocket, but with all in general too), but this was different. There was…a sourness to his voice that intermediately worried all of them up to the point that they all agreed that, before going to him, they would told Mantis to get there first.

And to make sure all alcoholic brewages were nowhere to be found in Star-Lord’s household.

 When they all arrived (after having left Adam, Cosmo and Phyla in charge of Knowhere -well, in all honestly; they had left Cosmo in charge and the other two happened to be there-), was just to find Mantis speaking with an old man they assumed to be the Famous Grandad in the porch of a low house in the middle of a row of extremely similar houses.

“ Humans are weird designing cities ” Nebula thought, thinking about the dullness of the street and wondering how their Quill could stand it.

When she saw them, Mantis stopped what seemed to be an extremely animated conversation with the earthling to wave at them emphatically before running towards them.

She obviously hugged Drax first, letting him raised her a couple of feet into the air. Then kneeled to salute Rocket as if he was still just recently put out of a coma (and squeaked with joy when she realised one of the baby racoons had come as a stowaway in the back of his suit). She continued giving a quick hug to both Kraglin and Groot and then…

…then she stopped, slightly uncomfortable, in front of Nebula.

“Hi”.

“Hi” the blue woman answered, lowering her eyes to the floor. “Uh…is Peter alright?”

“I mean, he had decided to teach children at a human school (apparently, the basic physics you have to know to survive in space are more than enough to be an expert in this planet and he’s really good with the kids…). Also; he still has nightmares about…many things, actually. But, yes, his problem is… external ”.

Just as she finished speaking, while giving Nebula a quizzical look she just couldn’t read for dear life, the aforementioned appeared and simply stated: “Humankind lives in the Palaeolithic”.

 “When I left Earth, it was the eighties, which was… many years ago . Back then…I was just a kid, but, uh…I kind of already knew gals weren’t my only…interest”.

“I mean, isn’t that the norm? Like, in my world, my wife was an isolated case for being like that . I mean, she only liked guys, not gals; that was why she loved me. It wasn’t as if she had a wrong perception of me, or that I forced her into anything, you get that, right?” Nebula had to admit, her heart melted a bit every time in the latest times when Drax had been able to speak about his wife and daughter without the pain and sorrow he used to show. He was healing and, if he was healing, that meant she was too; she wasn’t just imagining a temporal improvement that would eventually go away.

“Yes, Drax, yes. But, on Earth, back then, that was a bad thing ”.

“It wasn’t a bad thing, Pete. It was a thing prosecuted by the same people that made it impossible for us to give your mother the kind of treatment she deserved” the grandfather sounded angry, bitter and ready to charge his riffle against whoever those culprits were. Nebula decided she really liked him; “ most Americans ”.

“Grandpa, could I…?”

“Ey! Why do you shut up Grandad Jason and not Drax?!” Mantis said, hitting him in the arm. Nebula raised an eyebrow. Apparently, Mantis had decided he was also her grandfather by proxy and, by the elder man’s face, he agreed.

“Sorry, grandpa. As I was saying, I thought, after a life living in a world with this wasn’t an issue and with the humans we had met so far…that that had changed. Well, it hasn’t. Actually, it had gone worse the last few months and…since Ego’s death…I am just a human. I just get frustrated I cannot help , except by…would you like to come to a special demonstration with me? By, what I mean, at the same time. And then, we can get dinner or something; I am already going with someone” at this, Mantis giggled and Peter almost murdered her with his eyes.

Ah, sibling relationships…She clearly knew who that someone was and, for a second, Nebula’s mind thought about giving Gamora a call; she missed her own sibling.

Then, she decided, she had a better thing to do: she would propose to Mantis to both together alone to the demonstration.

Just to find out whoever Quill was going to so secretly.

Just that.

 “Bug” Mantis wrinkled her nose, clearly annoyed (and not in a fun way), when she called her once they had been left alone. “I have a proposal to make to you. Let’s go together to this demonstration thing, so you can accidentally lead me to your idiotic brother so I can find out who the secret companion is without putting you in the spot. You can obviously say no…you know I have other ways of knowing ”.

“I would like to see you trying them” she replied, with a fierceness she wasn’t used to hear in her voice. Wow, apparently, those months on her own had actually helped her.

“ I hope this doesn’t awake anything on me ” she thought.

Mantis stared at her eyes, and she stared back; four completely black orbs facing each other in the middle of a suburban neighbourhood in Boring-AF-USA. Time elapsed and, without even noticing it, they found their feet being far closer to the other than originally intended.

Nebula stepped back, uncomfortably, suddenly finding how a scrawny child brutally fell from his bicycle extremely fascinating. Mantis huffed and approached her until touching her arm and, to her very own surprise, the instinct of pulling away didn’t kick in.

She remained still, feeling the fingers of oddly texture of Mantis against her unusually thick skin, all of the sudden feeling as if it had become extremely thin, the other woman already reaching her deepest flesh and bone.

Was Mantis manipulating her emotionally? Or reading her? As she thought that, she noticed a puzzled look in her eyes, just as her antennae were doing some jerky movements she had never seen before.

She was just as paralysed and lost in the moment as Nebula herself. She shrugged trying to break out of their half-vegetative state.

“Bug! Answer my question… please ” Mantis was suddenly out of the moment’s spell.

“Fine, I will go with you…but just because you have a funny way of saying the word please ”.

“Fine”.

“Fine”.

As Mantis went inside, called by Jason to help with the dinner (the man was making a terrible mistake, if anything of what Mantis had cooked back in Knowhere was anything to guide her opinion by), Nebula shook her head and jumped on her own feet, trying to get rid of a certain type of nervousness she wasn’t at all comfortable feeling.

She turned to a moment, to see how the scrawny child (now with both knees covered in a disgusting mix of mud and his very own blood) was clearly laughing at her attitude.

A simple look was enough for the kid to crawl back into his house, screaming for his mother.

Nebula smirked; she hadn’t lost her touch. At least, not for everything .

 Mantis and Nebula poorly excused themselves to get away from the rest (which, actually, even included Jason Quill, who was carrying his riffle in case the cops got stupid with some of the younger kids ; definitively, iconic behaviour) and starting very casually wondering among the crowd, with Mantis pretending not to be going towards where she knew her brother would be standing.

As they walked among a group of people so colourful Nebula couldn’t help but wonder if, since things were so fucked up back here on Earth, they wouldn’t be better coming back with them to Knowhere (they could always use some more helping hands, after all). After about twenty minutes of tense silence, Mantis cleared her throat.

“I…I wanted to visit you guys in a couple of months…how…how are things going?”

“Rocket and the rest of the Guardians come and go. But you are in the same group chat as your useless brother, so you already know that…I miss you in Knowhere. I mean…you are literally the only one that can handle Drax sometimes, it had been a bit of a headache”.

At this, her friend scoffed.

“Funny that you would say that, because Drax has told me you are getting along almost too well for the person he thought you were ” she looked back, and her smile grew again. “So, you actually missed me ?”

Nebula grunted.

“Yes, maybe! Maybe I got used to you being there, about you always caring, even if nobody asked you to do so. Maybe I realised that speaking with you was only more pleasant than it was annoying. Maybe I have realised insect-like features are cutter than I was raised up to believe they were…FUCK, IS THAT THOR ?!”

Mantis took a couple of steps back to reach her height in the street and nodded, playfully.

“Yep, that is him. And the kid he kind of adopted; Peter is her teacher…and the dark haired kid too” she pointed at a girl with raven hair and a crocodile (with a bloody helmet, who knows why) between her legs, holding a pink-white-purple-black-blue flag. She was next to three adults: a blonde woman, a man with very similar dark hair and one with the type of hair she had heard plenty of people in the Blip Years calling Silver Fox Hair .

Nebula was still processing that she had just seen her idiot Peter kiss the fucking God of Thunder when Mantis held her by the arm, with a smile filling her whole face.

“So…you missed me?”

“You are reading my mind, Mantis, you know I feel it ” how she knew Mantis was reading her mind, she wasn’t certain. It was just…it just…for once, it felt as a right intromission and her whole body was telling her to make something so it didn’t stop.

“Yes, but…I wasn’t looking for your missing-me feelings” Nebula frowned.

“Weren’t you? Then, what on Earth…?”

“…I was looking about your me-kissing-you feelings”.

“And what are they?” her question was genuine. She had locked that part of herself so deep within her soul she wasn’t truly able to reach it.

For all answer, Mantis kissed her and people around them cheered. Usually, this kind of intromission in her personal life would have maddened Nebula, but, right now, a kind of happiness she wasn’t used to feeling clouded everything else.

She would let them go.

At least, for now.

[actress4him]

The Shadow of Death - Attack at Dawn

This piece is one that I wrote a long time ago, back before Kamaria’s story took a different direction than I’d originally planned. This was going to be the first chapter of the fic. I just saw it again and realized it could be worth posting, regardless of the pov character not really existing anymore haha. Nothing in it goes against the new canon so it exists perfectly fine in the canon universe.

Taglist: @painful-pooch

Contains: talk of war, talk of murder, unknowing misgendering, gun mention

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The Shadow of Death strikes during the night.

Wystan knows something is going on as soon as he wakes to shouting, clamoring voices. Groaning, he flips his blanket off and swings his legs over the side of the cot, rubbing a hand over his face as he stumbles to the opening of the tent. The sun has barely risen, but it’s still bright enough that he has to blink multiple times before the silhouettes scurrying around the camp are distinguishable as actual people.

“Hey.” He snatches at the sleeve of the first person that walks by close enough. “What’s going on?”

“It’s the Captain, sir.” He’s a young one, and too frazzled by whatever’s happening to realize or care that Wystan’s no sir. “He’s…dead.”

A wrinkle forms between Wystan’s eyebrows. “What? How?”

They’re in a war. Deaths happen on a near daily basis. But not in the middle of the night, in the midst of the camp. And not the man that’s been leading every other soldier here.

The private glances around and lowers his voice. “They say it was The Shadow. Slipped into his tent in the middle of the night and…” He makes a slicing motion across his throat with the side of his hand.

Everyone in this war knows about The Shadow of Death. An assassin, possibly the best that’s ever lived. No one’s ever seen his face, at least no one who has lived to tell about it. The closest anyone has ever gotten is an occasional report of a dark shadow slipping away into the night.

And of course he works for the other side. Kedosa has mercenaries, like himself, and probably even an assassin or two, but no one like The Shadow. No one else in that line of work has lasted so long, pulled off so many jobs, without being caught.

It’s Wystan’s first encounter with his work. He’ll be surprised if it’s the last.

There’s obvious turmoil going on in the general vicinity of the late Captain’s tent - the first and second lieutenants, namely, discussing something quite furiously, while multiple lower-ranking soldiers linger and gawk.

This is what they wanted, he thinks. To cause chaos, to remove the leadership and watch everyone flounder. The Captain’s absence doesn’t bother him, personally. His orders come from someone else entirely, he only has to make sure that he doesn’t get in the way of whoever is in charge here - and vice versa.

But these two need to get their act together, and soon, if they don’t want the rest of the camp panicking.

As if on cue, a scout thunders into the clearing on horseback. “Ethorcon soldiers coming! Ten minutes out!”

Ah. This is what they wanted. Attacking at dawn, when not everyone is yet up and going, is a strategic move by itself. Attacking right after killing the leader is even better.

‘Better’ from a certain perspective, of course. Not his, and not anyone else’s in this camp, that’s for sure.

To her credit, it only takes the First Lieutenant a few seconds of wide-eyed staring before she gathers herself and starts barking out orders. Gritting his teeth, Wystan turns back into his tent, slides into his boots, and snaps all of his armor into place with practiced speed. His rifle gets slung across his back, while two smaller guns strap to each hip. A cache of bullets for all of them weighs heavy on his chest.

Minutes later, he’s jogging north with a dozen other soldiers. As they pass the Captain’s tent, he can’t help but stare, wondering what kind of gruesome scene lies inside, glad that it won’t be his job to deal with it. A new officer will take the man’s place within a few days, and the First Lieutenant will be able to step back down.

It almost seems like a pointless effort, sometimes. Kill one man, another takes his place. Wipe out an entire guard, and there’s another right behind it. Years upon years of killing and dying, all for what? A tiny piece of land that no one wants to share.

Wystan isn’t one to judge, though. War is his business, and it’s a profitable one. As long as he’s the one doing the killing and not the dying, the idiots can fight over anything they want, and he’ll be there with his guns, smarts, and good looks to help.

[occult-roommates]

The landbitch

One night, Charlie got called by the landlady when she dropped the new she was raising the rent again. No, she can't do that! Where's that solidarity between people of the same species? They're both vampire after all.

Charlie: Margrit, please... Margrit: We are not on a first name basis, you will call me Misses Fairchild and nothing else. Charlie: I can't really call you misses considering you're divorced.

Well, Charlie did not help her case at all with that comeback. Great, now she gotta announce that to the other roommates.

To think she used to have pity of that woman. Her story on how she became a vampire is a bit tragic. She was born in what is now modern day Austria in 1884, exactly a century before Charlie, and moved to the States at only 20 to marry a man twice her age. To be fair, it was mostly in a gold digging move. The 1930s rolled around, and she caught him cheating on him with a woman who was born the year they got married. She threatened a divorce, and as revenge he tried killing her by hiring a vampire hitman. The hitman failed to fully suck her blood out and instead turned her into a vampire. Still alive, she got to divorce, but now the Fairchild no longer wanted anything to do with her, and her family back in Austria rejected her for being a vampire. She still had enough divorce money to buy an apartment building in the art district though, and she's been the landlady of the place ever since...Oh and all of that was for nothing, cause the old husband croaked less than a year later.

However, Margrit has long since reached a point where Charlie could no longer feel bad for her.

Charlie: Bad new folks, the rent increased again. Dawud: Are you kidding me? Rudi: Ah for fuck sake, I just got a raise at work! Dawud: Well, personally, and I'm just saying, but I am the only one here with like, a full time job that pays more than 15$ an hour. Like, I know these are though time, but you guys need to step up. Akva: Easy for you to say, you were pretty much given your job when you moved here and got trained for free. My pay is shit but I can't find anything else, and flight school is freaking expensive. Kino: You could ask your new girlfriend to move here. Akva: I don't think she would wanna do that, she has a nice apartment all to herself, unlike us who barely have enough and just forgotten what having a bit privacy is like. I mean, she's a video editor, do we even have space for her desk here? Why don't your girlfriend move here uh? Kino: I broke up with Lilah yesterday. Through text. Charlie: Kino, you can't keep breaking up with people through text! Kino: Why not? And also, we would have more place to sleep if you agreed to share your room too while all five of us plus my baby are cramped in one bedroom. Charlie: Well speaking of baby, you barely take care of him, I'm his main caregiver. Which great, not only are you not arsed to be a parent, but it's an extra financial strain on the household.

Having run out of argument, Kino simply made a random move that was similar to the C part of the YMCA dance. It seemed out of nowhere, but it was because it is the equivalent on Sixam of giving the middle finger.

Rudi: Talking a lot of shit anyway for someone who doesn't have a job. Kino: Well yes, but I'm paid by the government agent who sent me here like...an amount of money I will not disclose. Rudi: Say it! Daniele: STOP FIGHTING PLEASE I DON'T LIKE IT! Akva: Dan, shut up, you literally don't have a job and you were raised rich... Daniele: I do have one, I'm a tailor at my aunt's fashion workshop, but I don't work that often and she doesn't pay me cause we're family. Dawud: That's kind of a dick move on her part actually...Wait when we think about it, your family has well enough money that you don't need to live here, what are you even doing in this apartment? Yes, you were kicked out by your parents, but you also lived with your aunt your entire teenage years. Daniele: My family is rich but I don't have much money to my name and I wanted to leave as soon as I turn 18 but currently I'm wondering if I should not just go back... Charlie: Nobody is gonna move out of this place, we can't afford to lose anyone. If anything, we need a new member! Rudi: We clearly don't have place though, and will the landbitch even let us? Akva: Legally, every household is allowed to have a maximum of eight people, and as long as that maximum hasn't been reached, you cannot deny someone to move under a roof. However, as soon as there's eight people, you cannot accept anyone else, which is why anyone who can get pregnant needs to go on birth control if there's eight people in a household. Also, it's not because you have to allow maximum eight people that every house or apartment is made to accomodate that eight people. Dawud: ...That's messed up what the hell... Kino: Yeah, I don't wanna go on birth control against my will! Charlie: What, so you can get pregnant with another baby you won't take care of? Rudi: The idea of having an extra roommates wouldn't be so bad if you didn't had a fucking private bedroom while the rest of us plus the baby were all sharing the same room!

The roommates kept on arguing, which almost escalated into insults. "Thankfully", their next door neighbor knocked and told them to shut the fuck up, it's almost 11 pm. How was little Joseph even sleeping through that? Silly them, they shouldn't be mad at each other, clearly they should be pissed at Miss Fairchild for putting the rent so hard they need to be seven roommates to make it, and that's not even including basic stuff like food etc...But well, if getting a seven roommates is what it would take, like, they have someone of each species except a fairy so it would be the perfect opportunity to get a fairy under this roof.

And now, for totally unrelated reason, Audrey eating a burger.

Prev - Next

[motownfiction]

venus & jupiter

Daniel feels most like himself when he walks alone through a grocery store.

He knows how silly that seems. He’s been a husband and a father for more than thirty years, and he loves being with his family – the very people he’d been most excited to know, long before he ever knew what their names would be. But being alone in a grocery store is the time where he can think for himself. It’s the time when he doesn’t have to worry about his adult children in different pockets of the city, all trying to make things work, all getting their hearts filled and broken by the world on a rotating basis. It’s the time where he gets to remember what it means to be Daniel – not just Sadie’s loving husband, but Daniel, the very person he’d always been afraid of.

Today is his fifty-sixth birthday, and on his way home from the office, he stops by a grocery store, just to walk around. Sadie sent him a text earlier about how she and Billy are getting the cake ready, but they know he has somewhere to be. It makes him laugh. Sadie’s always thought the grocery store wandering is a little strange; in the end, of course, she likes it. It makes you unique, she says whenever he brings it up. It makes you my Daniel.

And that’s true, Daniel thinks.

It just makes him into his own Daniel, too.

He walks through the automatic doors and heads right to the bread. There’s something about it that always calls out to him first. As he examines the baguettes, he notices the radio above him is playing “Venus” by Shocking Blue. He tips his head from side to side in time with the music without really noticing. He’s always liked this song, even after it became the theme song for those razor commercials. It reminds him of being a little kid, drinking Boston coolers at the diner and pretending like he was grown-up already. Looking back, that was all Daniel ever wanted to be. Grown up. He just wanted to get over being a kid. Just wanted to grow up, get out, and make his own choices. Whenever a song like this one came on, he knew he could do it, even if freedom was a long time away. He smiles and puts a baguette in the cart he brought along out of social obligation. He’s not sure they need a baguette at home, but they’re getting one, anyway. This baguette will taste like a promise. Then again, he’s pretty sure baguettes usually just do.

As he makes his way to the pastries, the song changes. Unfortunately, it changes to something terrible: “Drops of Jupiter” by Train. It takes everything in Daniel’s power not to roll his eyes, especially once he sees a young woman about the same age as Rosemary slapping her hand across her chest like it’s the best song in the world; like they’re lucky to be standing in the middle of a Michigan grocery store, listening to it. He hates this song just as much as the next person who knows anything about good pop music, though he’s pretty sure he has a different reason for it. It was the soundtrack to the last unambiguously happy moment he shared with Charlie. Fourth of July, 2001. Everybody reunited in the Callaghans’ backyard, just like the old days, just like when they were kids. “Drops of Jupiter” came on the radio, and Charlie grabbed Daniel’s hand and asked him to dance.

Come on, Dan, he said. Let’s dance like we’re the teenagers we hope our kids never grow up to be!

Daniel could still laugh at it now. And in the middle of the chocolate chip cookies, he does. Part of him wants to call Charlie and remind him it’s his birthday, even though he’s pretty sure Charlie wouldn’t have forgotten. You don’t forget your best friend’s birthday, regardless of how long it’s been since you were actually best friends. He wants to call Charlie, anyway. He won’t. He can’t.

He walks through the store and thanks whoever is listening for the songs today, for Venus and Jupiter. As it turns out, he needed them. As it turns out, he needed them to remember who he used to be.

That’s the only way to figure out who he’s going to be.

Happy birthday, me.

(part of @nosebleedclub march challenge -- day i!)

[starlingsrps]

dorey mason, twenty five, codebreaker

dorey is a dorothea and she was raised comfortably middle class in london by people who were on the fringes of bohemia but went straight after having their first child, jessamine. bloomsbury turned into shepherd’s bush, writing jobs turned into teaching and keeping house and as the children kept coming, the names became less bohemian. jessamine (30) was followed by caspian (29), then dorey and then finally, exhausted, jane (23).

dorey’s father, gregory, always claimed to be more of a dabbler than an actual philosopher and while catherine had ambitions of greatness, she only plays the piano for pleasure these days. by the time dorey was born, gregory had taken a job teaching at a boy’s school and catherine was keeping then all from creative murder and teaching neighborhood piano lessons.

if they’re one of the odder families on their block, dorey really never noticed until she went away for school and learned not everyone was encouraged to do what made them happy or with a copy of married life hanging around on the shelves. they’re all still a bit liberal - jessa is a costume designer for theater, cas trains horses in rural ireland, jane is studying medicine in canada, and dorey does math for both fun and a living.

she was always the studious one in her family and if her parents stopped being able to make heads or tails of her math homework before she hit puberty, they were still supportive. she won a scholarship to newnham college at cambridge and holds a double first in mathematics. technically, she doesn't have a full degree but she should never be asked about that.

by the time she finished, the war had started and as absolutely no war jobs held much appeal to her (weak ankles, too many years in a library), she started working as an assistant to a professor at the university of london and biding her time. eventually, he was recruited to the government code and cypher school and dorey was very much part of the package. there were a few frustrating weeks where she was primarily doing clerical work before being assigned to hut six as a codebreaker on army and air force engima deciphering and that’s where she’s stayed.

she’s very good at her work and takes a lot of pride in it. she’s always enjoyed puzzles and problem solving and loves the rush of being the first to crack the cipher for the day. obviously for war effort alone. only the war effort.

(being right is dorey’s very favorite thing and winning is her second)

dorey’s work takes up the lion’s share of her time and attention. it’s on a need to know basis - she’s told her family she works for the war department and she couldn’t say much more if she wanted to. she’s become a little solitary since joining bletchley, due to the nature of her work, but she does her best when she can. she can be very selfish with what little time she does have and clipped and short when she's operating on fumes.

despite all of this, she is tender deep down. she's very close to her family and stays with jessa when she's in london. she keeps a steady correspondence with cas in ireland and jane in canada and while she worries that she's doomed to be the maiden aunt, she knows that they'll always love her. she can be sweet and thoughtful and blooms with the right people. she has a good, clumsy heart and being vulnerable doesn't come easily to her - having feelings? in wartime? hideous.

(absolutely aching to be cared for over here)

BUT until the war is over: she's got work to do and that comes first always.