#he IS allowed to feel upset that robby's not performing

[gaffney]

miguel diaz is both robby keene's strongest advocate and the one who makes him feel like he’s constantly falling short, and i just don't know how to feel about that

[jmsa1287]

A Year in Review: The 25 Best Films of 2019

This list may seem a few months late from the rest of the media, but I consider the movie season to stretch 14 months, from the start of the Sundance Film Festival in January through the end of the Oscars ceremony in February. This year's movie season was shortened as the 92nd Academy Awards were held about three weeks earlier than usual, commencing on Feb. 9. Of course, South Korean director Bong Jon-ho's "Parasite" took home the Best Picture prize making history as the Academy's first-ever non-English language film to take home the top award.

Now that the Oscars have officially wrapped up, and the 2020 movie season is revving up (to a weak start), I feel comfortable with sharing my favorite 25 films of 2019. From box office hits to smaller gems, below is a breakdown of the top films that debuted last year.

25. “The Beach Bum,” directed by Harmony Korine

24. “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood,” directed by Marielle Heller

23. “Toy Story 4,” directed Josh Cooley

22. “Alita: Battle Angel,” directed by Robert Rodriguez

21. “The Lighthouse,” directed by Robert Eggers

20. “A Long Day’s Journey into Night,” directed by Bi Gan

19. “Doctor Sleep,” directed by Mike Flanagan

18. “6 Underground,” directed by Michael Bay

17. “Uncut Gems,” directed by Josh Safdie and Benny Safdie

16. “The Nightingale,” directed by Jennifer Kent

15. “Hustlers,” directed by Lorene Scafaria

Lorene Scafaria's "Hustlers" might be the most fun film of 2019, composed of brilliant shots and serving as a spotlight to showcase Jennifer Lopez's talents. Mostly set during the 2008 recession, the film is a condemnation of late stage capitalism while following a group of strippers, played by Lopez as well as Constance Wu, Keke Palmer, Lili Reinhart and more, who drug wealthy men and steal from them — until their crimes catch up with them.

14. “The Farewell,” directed by Lulu Wang

An impressive debut feature from Lulu Wang, "The Farewell" is a special kind of family tale, featuring a breakout performance from comedian Awkwafina. Rooted from Wang's true story (which was first turned into an episode of "This American Life"), "The Farewell" is unlike any kind of family drama you've seen; a deeply personal, sad but ultimately uplifting film about the things we choose to tell (and not tell) those closest to us.

13. "Asako I & II," directed by Ryusuke Hamaguchi

Following up his six-hour film "Happy Hour," Japanese filmmaker Ryusuke Hamaguchi's "Asako I & II" clocks in at just two hours but still manages to pack in a number of the same themes. Here, a young woman named Asako (Erika Karata) briefly falls in love with a handsome boy named Baku (Masahiro Higashide) in her hometown in rural Japan before he suddenly vanishes. After moving to Tokyo a few years later, Asako spots Baku — but he tells her his name is Ryohei (also played by Higashide). From there, a relationship blooms and unravels. Similar to "Happy Hour," Hamaguchi's effortless ability to draw an emotional response from the ebbs and flows of deep, personal relationships (between friends, family, lovers) is unparalleled.

12. "Climax," directed by Gasper Noé

Gasper Noé is often hit-or-miss with most movie audiences. His films are always provocative and his latest feature "Climax" is no exception. Set in the 90s, a French dance troupe rehearses a routine ("Climax" opens with the single best scene of 2019) before celebrating for the night with some snacks and sangria — which someone has spiked with LSD. The rest of the film plays out like a perverse whodunnit while the group, led by Sofia Boutella, tries to figure out what's going on before losing their minds and allowing deep secrets ruin their lives.

11. "The Irishman," directed by Martin Scorsese

Martin Scorsese's long-awaited return to the gangster flick resulted in a three-and-a-half-hour epic. "The Irishman," which reunites Marty with Robert De Niro and Joe Pesci, also stars Al Pacino (the first time the actor appeared in a film by the acclaimed director), as Jimmy Hoffa. The film is Scorsese's most meditative work outside his films about religion. There is as much subtext to the film as there is text, making "The Irishman" a dazzling feat of filmmaking and storytelling, featuring outstanding performances from its three leads.

10. "Gloria Bell," directed by Sebastián Lelio

Since his 2017 breakout film "A Fantastic Woman," Sebastián Lelio's career has been quite quiet. Nevertheless, the English-language remake of his own Chilean-Spanish film "Gloria," re-titled "Gloria Bell," is a stunning piece of filmmaking. Starring Julianne Moore as the titular character, the film follows the middle age single woman through the ups and downs of her dating and family life. It's an unassumingly beautiful film that is gorgeous and features one of Moore's best performances to date.

09. "Her Smell," directed by Alex Ross Perry

Alex Ross Perry's career has dramatically shifted since working with Elisabeth Moss on the 2015 thriller "Queen of Earth." Instead of making quirky New York City centric love stories (a la Noah Baumbach and Woody Allen before him), Perry once again teams up with Moss for "Her Smell." Structured like a five-act play, the film follows Becky Something (Moss), the leader of an all-girl punk group. In what is Moss's best performance to date, Becky is an addict and downright evil at times as she manipulates those around her. It's a dizzying feat of filmmaking that puts Moss to the test.

08. "Ad Astra," directed by James Gray

Brad Pitt won the Oscar for his performance in "Once Upon a Time... In Hollywood," but "Ad Astra" was his best performance in 2019. Following up his 2016 masterpiece "The Lost City of Z," director James Gray continues on his path of making ambitious epics, moving from the Amazon to the depths of our solar system. Here Pitt's Roy McBride is on a mission to find his father (Tommy Lee Jones), who is literally lost in space. Roy has to confront his issues with his father as he battles moon pirates, rabid baboons and his inner demons. "Ad Astra" is not only an impressive film for Grey, but Pitt's turn as the sad spaceman is nuanced and shows how much range the Hollywood icon actually has.

07. "Honeyland," directed by Ljubomir Stefanov and Tamara Kotevska

"Honeyland" made Oscars history when it became the first film to be nominated in both Best International Feature Film and Best Documentary Feature — and for good reason. Clocking in at just 85 minutes, Ljubomir Stefanov and Tamara Kotevska's stunningly beautiful film follows Hatidže Muratova, a beekeeper living in a remote village in North Macedonia. But "Honeyland" is so much more than that; it's a universal story about our delicate ecosystem, fickle Mother Nature, taking care of our family and having bad neighbors. In what may seem like a specific tale turns out to be incredibly relatable, with Stefanov and Kotevska achieving some of the best nonfiction filmmaking in years.

06. "Once Upon a Time... In Hollywood," directed by Quentin Tarantino

Quentin Tarantino's penultimate film "Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood" is a love letter to Tinseltown. Here, he honors the summer of 1969 as the film industry is thriving with newcomers like Sharon Tate (Margot Robbie) and aging stars like Rick Dalton (Leonardo DiCaprio in his best performance ever). Rick is a TV villain and his stunt double Cliff Booth (Brad Pitt) is along for the ride. "OUATIH" is more of a hangout movie than something one would expect from QT; it's more in line with the sophistication of "Jackie Brown" than the over-the-top cartoon violence found in "Django Unchained." Like Martin Scorsese's "The Irishman," "OUATIH" is a contemplative and meditative look at aging, youth culture and America through the prism that is Tarantino.

05. "Midsommar," directed by Ari Aster

Following up his horror masterpiece "Hereditary" just one year later, Ari Aster returned with the daylight gonzo vacation nightmare "Midsommar." Like with "Hereditary" and its star Toni Collette, Ari gets a stunning performance out of rising star Florence Pugh, who plays Dani. She just suffered a major tragedy and is decides to go on a trip to a remote village in Sweden with her aloof boyfriend (Jack Reynor) and his college pals. The trip, of course, is worse than anyone could have imagined and plays out in complete sunlight, making Aster's daytime nightmare incredibly upsetting and one of the most vibrant horror films ever made.

04. "Pain and Glory," directed by Pedro Almodóvar

Spanish auteur Pedro Almodóvar returned last year with "Pain and Glory," unlike any movie he's made in his nearly 40-year career. It's a deeply personal film and one of his most quiet and contemplative. It also reunites the filmmaker with Antonio Banderas — in his best role ever — who starred in Almodóvar's earlier films and his 2011 horror film "The Skin I Live in." Despite it being far removed from Almodóvar's oeuvre, it still fits in snugly with his work, resulting in a beautiful and self-reflexive film about age, lost love and the past.

03. "Little Women," directed by Greta Gerwig

On paper, remaking "Little Women" in 2019 might have seemed like a fool's errand. But Greta Gerwig's take on the classic story, and her follow up to her breakthrough film "Lady Bird," gave a new purpose to Louisa May Alcott's centuries old story about the March sisters living in Concord, Mass. During the Civil War. Here, Gerwig assembles the hottest cast of 2019 (Saoirse Ronan, Timothée Chalamet, Florence Pugh, Emma Watson, Laura Dern, Eliza Scanlen, Bob Odenkirk, Louis Garrel, Chris Cooper and Meryl Streep), enlists Alexander Displat for the score and Yorick Le Saux to carry out luscious cinematography. But it's Gerwig's breakdown of the story and her daring changes to the novel that make her rendition of "Little Women" vital and beautiful. She manages to retain the Alcott's tone and vibrance while bringing something wholly original to a story we've seen time and time again, proving Gerwig is a master storyteller.

02. "Parasite," directed by Bong Joon-ho

Bong Joon-ho's "Parasite" took the world by storm. A true tour de force, the South Korean film started hot out of the gate, winning the Palme d'Or award at the Cannes Film Festival, blazing its way to win Best Picture at the Oscars earlier this month. And rightfully so — "Parasite" is a relatable tale about class struggle unlike any other film in its genre. Joon-ho, who has other masterpieces under his belt ("Mother," "Memories of Murder"), is in total control of his film; a true craftsman and storyteller, who knows how to build tension, introduce bits of comedy and create compelling characters. The film is complex yet fully understandable; a truly accomplished piece of filmmaking that will become a gateway for world cinema.

01. "Marriage Story," directed by Noah Baumbach

Noah Baumbach's "Marriage Story" is his most sophisticated and considered film to date. Following a couple (Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson) going through a divorce, Baumbach crafts a personal story with a raw script that is executed by astonishing performances from its two leads and its wonderful supporting cast (Laura Dern, Alan Alda, Ray Liotta, Merritt Wever). For so many films about finding love, there are few that are directly about the end of a relationship or divorce and Baumbach's intimate tale is a dazzling feat of not only writing, but acting and understanding of how all the moving pieces of a movie can coalesce into a breathtaking piece of art.

[dextervexter]

god it really wasn’t as bad as it could have been but it certainly wasn’t the best. I will say it was definitely no where near as horny as everyone is making it out to be.

so first of all, I’m opening with I’m not gonna talk about the ENTIRE movie but just some parts of it but there will definitely be spoilers

I was right about a LOT of stuff going in, like Macavity whisking away a lot of the contenders for rebirth so he could be chosen. I was also right about Taylor Swift not being in the movie for more than five minutes, I was right about Tugger not having a massive role, I was right about Grizabella being given a past with Macavity, and I was right about the dancing being fuckin bad

I was also unfortunately right about Jenny eating her cockroaches and I literally could not look at the screen during her whole number I was so upset I felt so trapped The Gumbie Cat Number Is A Fucking Hostage Situation 

H o w e v e r -wheeze-

Over all, it was Cats. It was a really REALLY weird take on Cats, but it was consistent with the stage play save for some changes with characters and pacing. Hooper clearly watched multiple versions of the play to try and get the vision he liked the best. He understood that this would be difficult, and he did what he could to try and get this weird ass musical on screen. There are parts of it I liked, there are parts of it I didn’t care for, and there were parts I astral projected to get away from. But if you go see this movie, you will be seeing Cats as it was when it first arrive on Westend in 1981. Original arrangements of the songs are used as well, for example, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer  is sung as the jazzy and insidious number from the OLC rather than the bouncy and fun 98 version. I don’t think it’s awful but it’s definitely not what younger fans are familiar with. 

I think the only issue with the musical arrangements I have was the singing because Hooper once again insisted on having everyone sing live and it really hinders a lot of talented people. Often times I found myself wondering if these people were capable of singing in the slightest. But I think that’s just bad choices on Hooper’s part.

Let’s talk about the Good:

The best part of the film is definitely Skimbleshanks, and not just because he fucks and later kills a man with his supreme tap skills. The visuals are great, this is the only part with actual good dancing, and Steven Macrea has fantastic energy. Skimbleshanks is already one of my favorite numbers in the stage musical, and they get pretty creative with this. It was one of the moments in the movie where I could say for sure I was REALLY having a good time.

Also Les Twins were absolutely a treat to watch. They were funny, talented, clearly having a ton of fun, and played off each other as though they weren’t in a movie, they were just goofing around like real siblings do. I found myself actually missing them when they weren’t on screen

Robbie Fairchild does a decent Munkustrap and has some fun exchanges with the other characters. I also thought Jason Derulo did a wonderful job as Tugger despite not being in the film a lot. He’s self centered, clearly caught up in his own world, and is so obsessed with himself he doesn’t really flirt with anyone or focus a lot on Victoria for too long because he’s just so in love with himself and what he wants. And honestly that is basically just tugger.

The visuals are also really nice. The sets and practical effects help the movie feel more real and bring a great sense of life to this world that is happening right under the human one. The whole movie has this lovely, dream like quality to it, and it helped remind everyone we weren’t supposed to take it so seriously. 

There were also a moment with Munkustrap that I thought was really cute, where Jenny complains she’s just as good as Tugger because she can break dance too. You hear Munkustrap chuckle and say “oh yeah? show me.” in a really playful way and it was adorable, even if it resulted in me seeing Rebel Wilson pop and lock,

Lastly, and this is a big one I know a lot of fans were angry about: Misto is implied to like victoria, but it’s never stated that they end up together. Actually a lot of their interactions can be interpreted as Just Friends Being Pals. It’s definitely not as big of a problem as a lot of people were making it out to be, but it’s just not interesting and doesn’t really matter to the plot.

I liked more of it than I was expecting, especially the little shout outs to Eliot’s original drafts of the poems. I’m seeing it again tomorrow with friends so I’ll probably post more about the things I missed (i seriously missed a lot of the gumbie cat number because i was too horrified to look so maybe i will be braver this time)

NOW THE BAD!!!

This is literally the worst fucking Macavity ever and Idris Elba had every right to be as piss drunk as he was at the premier. In fact I’m pretty sure he was drunk for a majority of the film. It’s very clear he is not having a good time, he is not enjoying the story, and he doesn’t want to be there. Granted, I’m willing to place a lot of the blame on Hooper’s take on the story, which required Macavity to be a greater presence, but a lot of what we see is a clowning, pathetic, loser who is throwing a tantrum because he isn’t getting his way and he’s very very naked for most of it. His last moments in the film were so laughable, so embarrassing, and so unbelievably desperate that I could barely watch. There is no dignity in Elba’s performance, and nothing mysterious or threatening about him. It’s not just 2019 Macavity that hurts this movie though, it’s how Macavity changes a massive part of the story with his nonsense, but I’m saving that for last because it’s a big one and I hate it!

Victoria is basically really bland. There was absolutely no reason to try and make this from her perspective. Like Webber and Hooper say they wanted her to serve as the character we see the world through but she’s bland, uninteresting, and just very boring. I understand their reasoning for making her the lead, as Victoria is a very recognizable character and easy to follow in dark lighting and crowded dancing, but she just simply exists to stare in wonder and ask questions that are answered in songs that she will stare in wonder over. If they wanted to have the audience experience the world through a character they probably should have gone with Munkustrap or something considering he’s narrating a majority of the film and knows what’s going on and can explain things a little better. He’s also a stronger character. Victoria is boasted to be this strong but shy little thing who approaches this new world with curiosity and hope and she’s really not. She doesn’t really get the chance to do or say anything that would help with the plot. she barely speaks to anyone but munk or misto, and it is very much a downgrade from her stage counterpart. Frankie Hayward is a very pretty dancer, but she’s not given much to work with and I found myself not caring in the slightest what she was up to.

This also leads into Beautiful Ghosts, which I posted about before so I’ll just leave this here and move on because I’ve said all I can say and I have more important things to talk about regarding Grizabella. to summarize, I was right and the song sucked.

The dancing is lamentable mess as well. God I sometimes forgot they were dancing. They are moving, but it’s not dancing. I would say only Les Twins and Jaih Bote were the clear dancers because they were pretty much the only ones allowed to put their own personal spins on the choreography. I’ve said it so many times and I will say it again Andy Blankenbluer is a fucking awful choreographer. His work is claustrophobic and ugly to look at. You lose the person in the movement but in the sense that you really don’t care if you see them again. Blankenbluer has stated so many times he feels as though audiences don’t have the attention spans for long dances sequences anymore and want more than one thing to see, but for the love of god could you give us something to look at? The dances are quick, ugly, and the moves are put down before they can make a good impression. He has no understanding of how to define a character through movement, which makes telling everyone apart very difficult, especially since the designs are already so unrecognizale. His work was  atrocious in the 2016 Cats Revival, but at least he had Gillian Lynne’s original choreography to lean on. Without the backing of better choreographers, his work is downright forgettable. 

Now the Big One, the inexcusable and awful part that I hate hate hate: Grizabella.

God I was rooting for her we were all rooting for her. Remember how in the 98 film she’s this broken down, cast aside, character barely hanging by a thread? Yeah in this she not only is given a throw away past where she chooses to side with Macavity for some unknown reason, but she’s chosen as a last resort. Yeah. Remember how I said Macavity’s plot paves the way for the mishandling of a beloved and tragic character. This is it. After Macavity steals literally everyone who is competing for rebirth, after Old D is returned, the Jellicles realize they have no one to choose from for rebirth. Victoria goes outside, brings Grizabella in, they sing memory, and she gets chosen. It is framed in a way that the cats all realize how badly she has it, but oh my god does it come off as heartless, careless and pis aller. Old D has no interaction with Grizabella until this point. The Jellicles don’t really interact with her unless to shoo her away. She is basically a background character for the whole movie. Giving her a past with Macavity was pointless. It never comes up. Macavity never sees her in the film. It’s never stated why she chose him or what she did with him. There is not a shred of dignity in Hudson’s performance, and I fully attribute that to Hooper making all his actors sing on set. Grizabella comes off as pitiable, but not enough to want to see her be reborn. It was downright heartless.

OVERALL!!

I give this movie a 6/10 stars. When they are doing Cats, it’s pretty enjoyable. Not everything I wanted, and some things I genuinely didn’t fucking ask for, but overall it is not as big of a problem as I thought it was going to be. I think if you’re apprehensive or angry about the film, I think you should give it a watch and you’ll either like it or you won’t. 

you should definitely not expect the 98 version, because no version will ever be that perfect, but go in with an open mind and give it a chance. 

[wrestlingisfake]

Southern Showdown preview

This is a special event in Melbourne, Australia, starting at 5am Eastern time Saturday morning.  Unlike most New Japan shows, which are streamed live on NJPW World, this one is an internet pay-per-view exclusive to Fite.tv.  The story seems to be that NJPW wanted to ensure Australians could stream the show, and apparently Fite has a superior infrastructure there.  The whole thing will be uploaded to NJPW World later, although I’m not sure how much later.

(A second, smaller event is scheduled for Sydney on June 30, but it looks like that one won’t be televised at all.)

Kazuchika Okada & Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Jay White & Bad Luck Fale - This match revisits a feud from a few months back, when Tanahashi and Okada put aside their differences to form a united front against White, leading to White and Fale upsetting the “dream team” multiple times.  White is originally from New Zealand, and Fale played rugby and opened a wrestling school there, so they’re practically the local favorites.  (Or maybe being from New Zealand will make them mega-heels in Australia, I’m not sure.)

White is still looking to avenge his IWGP title loss to Okada, and Tanahashi is still trying to prove White hasn’t put him out to pasture.  The most meaningful finishes that are actually plausible would be White over Okada or Tanahashi over White, but I could see New Japan saving those scenarios for later in the year.  It’s probably going to come down to Okada over Fale, or maybe White over Tanahashi if they think White gloating in Melbourne will get a good response.

Will Ospreay vs. Robbie Eagles - Ospreay won the IWGP junior heavyweight championship on June 9 and immediately demanded Eagles as his first challenger, at this show.  Eagles, who is Australian, is one of only two men to defeat Ospreay in this year’s Best of the Super Jr. tournament.  It’s a big opportunity for Eagles to win the title in front of his home country.

Eagles has been doing a slow burn storyline where he’s not sure Bullet Club has his best interests at heart, particularly after some shenanigans from El Phantasmo on the Best of Super Jr. tour.  The fact Ospreay gave him this opportunity out of respect, where his own teammates would have dicked him over, may play into that story.  Ospreay is clearly passionate about giving the rub to the Australian wrestling scene and will do everything in his power to make Eagles look good.  I don’t expect a title change here, but a star-making performance is possible.

Tama Tonga & Tanga Loa vs. Juice Robinson & Mikey Nicholls - This is a rematch from June 25, where Robinson and Nicholls defeated the Guerillas of Destiny and therefore challenged GOD to a match for the IWGP heavyweight tag team title.  (GOD also hold the ROH tag team championship, but that one isn’t at stake.)  New Japan desperately needed some fresh challengers in this division, so I hope Juice and Mikey don’t just get beat and drift apart.  Nicholls is Australian, and I think this is the best chance we have of an Australian winning a championship on this show.  GOD doesn’t need the IWGP tag title right now, and could always win it back in September or something.  I’m rooting for Juice and Mikey, but the Tongans are on a roll and I’d rather not bet against them.

El Phantasmo vs. Rockey Romero - Phantasmo is defending the RevPro cruiserweight championship.  ELP joined New Japan a few weeks ago and enjoyed an undefeated streak until Romero dramatically upset him during the Best of the Super Jr. tournament.  The loss kicked off a late collapse for Phantasmo, and he’s sought revenge against everyone who defeated him in the tournament.  He already settled the score with Yoh and Ryusuke Taguchi, so that just leaves Rocky.  A title change is possible, I suppose, but ELP is a hot new star and Rocky just isn’t at the level of a guy who should go 2-0 against a hot new star.  I’m sure they’ll try to recapture the fire of their previous match, but since I’m pretty sure Phantasmo will retain, it probably won’t be easy.

Tomohiro Ishii & YOSHI-HASHI vs. Chase Owens & Yujiro Takahashi - Yoshi is going nowhere fast, and Chase and Yujiro are basically jobbers to the stars.  This feels like a filler match to get Ishii on the card with a win.

Toru Yano & SHO & YOH vs. Taiji Ishimori & Gedo & Gino Gambino - Yano is one of the NEVER trios champions, but Roppongi 3K (Sho & Yoh) aren’t his championship partners, so the title isn’t on the line in this trios match.  Ishimori recently teamed with El Phantasmo to take the IWGP junior tag titles from R3K, who will be looking for payback.  At this stage of his career, Gedo is little more than a comedy heel/evil manager, so I wouldn’t count on much from him besides competing with Yano for funny/sneaky spots.

Gino Gambino is probably best known to New Japan fans as “that Australian guy on English commentary that one time” or “wait, who is this guy in the list of Bullet Club members?”  I’ve barely even seen Gambino because NJPW tends not to point the camera at the English announcers, so I sure don’t know anything about him as a wrestler.  I assume he’s little more than a journeyman or a utility guy, but it’s his home country so let’s get him on the show.  On paper, Gedo is probably losing the fall here.

Aaron Solow vs. Slex - Solow’s biggest claim to fame is his wife, WWE’s Bayley.  He’s been in the indies for ten years, but he recently went through Bad Luck Fale’s school in New Zealand, which is probably how he figures into this show.  Slex has been wrestling for 16 years, notably with Melbourne  Championship Wrestling.  Slex is also from Melbourne, so he’s the local-est of all the local guys on this show.  The stakes are high because a strong performance could put one or both of these guys on the radar for future New Japan tours.  It could go either way but I think the smart move would be to put over Slex.  I like saying Slex.  Slex Slex Slex.

Toa Henare & Shota Umino & Ren Narita vs. Mark Tui & Michael Richards & Andrew Villalobos - Henare, who is Maori, has “graduated” from the Young Lions system but he’s still basically a rookie jobber prelim guy, so he’s only a step above guys like Umino and Narita.  Tui is a coach at Bad Luck Fale’s school; Richards and Villalobos are graduates of the Fale dojo who have moved on to New Japan’s own dojo but have not debuted as Young Lions yet.  So I’m not actually sure who is “allowed” to beat whom in the pecking order here, which may make this one pretty fun.  If it’s me I’d give the win to Henare, but I always want Henare to win and I don’t much get what I want.

[gemstoneandtriangle]

Ego Shorts Explained pt. 3: Dynamics

(Otherwise known as how I see everyone interacting with each other. See if you can spot the community inspired references. Spoilers: they're all inspired by the community)

Best friends:

Dr. Schneeplestien and Chase

Anti and JJ

JJ and Marvin

JJ and Robbie

Friends:

JJ and Jackieboy Man

JJ and Chase

JJ and Dr. Schneeplestien

Marvin and Chase

Chase and Jackieboy Man

Jackieboy Man and Dr. Schneeplestein

Neutral:

Chase and Robbie

Jackieboy Man and Marvin

Robbie and Jackieboy Man

Enemies:

Jackieboy Man and Anti

Robbie and Dr. Schneeplestien

Dr. Schneeplestein and Anti

Chase and Anti

Best Frienemies:

Dr. Schneeplestien and Marvin

Anti and Robbie

Anti and Marvin

Robbie and Marvin

Dynamics Explained:

Schneep and Chase both have similar family problems. Schneep is the supportive friend who works towards seeing their friend be happy and healthy. Very defensive. Chase appreciates the support and makes sure Schneep doesn't overwork himself. The two go out for coffee breaks when needed. Schneep is aware that Anti is after Chase, especially after dealing with the him before. Schneep is the first person Chase goes to when he needs to talk about his problems, and the good doctor will usually drop whatever he's doing to listen.

Anti met JJ as soon as he was brought into the "Septic Family" and wasted no time corrupting him. JJ doesn't seem to have any long lasting effects from the corruption, but does have occasional violent tendencies. These are usually hidden as clumsy mishaps with sharp objects, mostly directed at himself, but can harm another person. When these are not present, JJ acts as his usual self, cheerful and eager to entertain. Anti has taken the liberty to teach the mute sign language, earning his trust even more, and very occasionally lets JJ sit in during his crocheting. JJ is very friendly and trusting towards each ego, and Anti is no different. Most of the time he is the first to even tell if Anti is around, giving away his location. It is unclear whether the two are really friends or if Anti is simply controlling him, but they are considered best friends anyways.

JJ and Marvin quickly became friends in fashion and entertainment. Marvin is always looking for volunteers for his tricks, and JJ is always willing to help. Even when a preformamce goes wrong, JJ will be the first to reassure Marvin and encourage him to try again. JJ is very supportive and will even help Marvin with a patch job if needed. Both egos' over the top demeanor work well off of each other for entertaining shows, allowing them to be close friends.

Robbie is usually left out of the group (considering he's not offically recognized as an ego by Jack himself), so JJ decided to fix that. JJ acts as an escort and translator of sorts for the zombie and regularly lends him a hand. Robbie has never thanked him yet, but JJ can see the gratitude in his cold, dead eyes. When the others are all against Robbie, JJ will stand by his side.

Jackieboy Man and JJ aren't too close, but Jackieboy does keep an eye out on the mute, mostly due to Anti's influence on him. Jackieboy usually asks for help with his super suit as a way to check up on JJ, making small tears with a pair of scissors and a story in case he is questioned. If he causes minimal damage to himself or the hero, he's fine. If he's constantly getting stuck by needles, Anti's up to no good. Jackieboy does feel bad about tricking JJ, but feels a hero needs to do whatever he can to keep innocent civillians safe. Jackieboy also notices when JJ is helping the other egos with their jobs, and feels a sense of pride knowing he is keeping Anti away from him. JJ supports the hero when he can, encouraging him to never give up the fight against evil.

Chase and JJ get along just fine, especially when working on videos. Chase does think that something is a little off with the way JJ acts, but doesn't question it any farther. JJ will occasionally check in with Chase if he's been quiet all day, making sure he hasn't done anything drastic. If Chase is caught with a bottle, JJ will be the first to tell him off about drinking, reminding him how it won't solve anything.

Schneep is very cautious around JJ, also aware of Anti's influence on him. After doing a thorough check up, Schneep discovered JJ is fully in control of his actions, does not suffer from any mental illnesses, and that he does, in fact, have working vocal cords, meaning JJ can speak, but chooses not to. Schneep appreciates any help JJ brings during his work, even if he is a little clumsy. JJ can recognize when Schneep has been overworking and will do his best to separate him from his work before a very unfortunate patient gets hurt.

Marvin is interested by Chase's show, and is constantly asking to be on it, wanting to show off his magic. Chase usually says no, claiming his show is about average trickshots and not about fooling an audience. Marvin once pointed out how he fooled the audience into thinking he's living a happy life with his family and Chase broke down crying. Marvin quickly apologized and made flowers appear from his wand to cheer him up. It didn't work. Marvin stopped asking to be on his show after that. He does still offer advice for new tricks to impress his audience and has even helped supply fireworks for one show. Marvin tries to support Chase and help him when he's upset, going so far as to perform a private show for him. He's even bought a book about consuling friends and mending wounds. He does slip up and say the wrong things sometimes, but tries to make up for it afterwards.

Jackieboy Man is one of the egos that will break down Chase's door if he feels like he's in trouble. Anti has had his eyes on torturing him for quite some time now, and Jackieboy will not let that happen! Chase appreciates the support, but does feel like Jackieboy can be overbearing. He's just trying to protect the innocent from harm! It's his job! Jackieboy makes sure to end every visit with a pep talk, encouraging words, and a reminder to keep up a "Positive! Mental! Attitude!" before leaving. It gets repetitive after a while, but there's something about the PMA shout that makes Chase smile.

Jackieboy Man will sometimes find injured civillians with nowhere to bring them shelter during his patrols, and the only person he can turn to is Schneep. Jackieboy monitors the patient the entire time they're there, fully aware of the doctor's habits when he doesn't have his coffee. When he's finished, Jackieboy will thank Schneep for understanding the situation and escort the civilian back to their home. Jackieboy will remind Schneep about PMA as well, wanting him to spread that mindset to his patients. Schneep is the only victim of Anti that Jackieboy is not aware of, meaning his patrols around his room are very few and kept to the point.

Chase, like most of the egos, is very wary around Robbie, unsure if he is safe to be around. On good days, Chase may forget about his fear of the zombie and may hang out with him, showing him a few trick shots. Robbie doesn't say it, but Chase likes to thing he enjoys them.

Jackieboy Man and Marvin both admire the other's masks and value of keeping people happy, but that's about all they agree on. Jackieboy usually gets an earful about his lack of cape from the magician and Marvin is always told he could be helping people with his magic from the hero. The two basically tolerate each other.

Robbie is a zombie! A threat to Jackieboy Man's quest to keep people safe! He doesn't do much other than limp around and moan, sure, but he's a zombie! Maybe Robbie just needs some PMA to keep himself out of trouble.

Ever since Jack was first attacked by Anti, Jackieboy Man has made it his life goal to stop the demon from taking anymore lives. Anti will berate Jackieboy for failing at his job of protecting Jack and brag that he has plans for the other egos, or as he likes to call them: "puppets". Jackieboy and Anti get into verbal and physical fights nearly every time they are in the same room. Negative mind set versus positive mental attitude, good versus evil, superhero versus super demon, who will win?

Schneep is very fascinated by Robbie and only wants to run a few tests... Too bad the zombie hates doctors and needles. Usually slow, Robbie will suddenly get a boost of speed if it means he gets away from Schneep. On rare occasions, the two will put their differences aside for a coffee break.

Schneep didn't believe Anti was a person at first, and instead treated him like a mental illness, until Jack suddenly became serverly ill and had to be operated on. Schneep found Jack suffering from several symptoms, and could not figure out a cure. Soon he realized that he was suffering from the same symptoms too. He nodded off several times, and once caught himself trying to choke himself with headphone cords. Schneep claims he has no memory of anything after, including Jack flatlining, seeing as he's still here, walking around like nothing's wrong, but the doctor does remember hearing Jack's voice near the end of the operation, but something wasn't right about it. After the whole ordeal, Schneep started seeing Anti, walking around among the egos, interacting with them. Schneep knows he's real now, and has vowed to protect the others from his influence, seeing just how powerful he really is. Anti will glitch into his office on occasions, messing with his supplies, sometimes going so far as to force Schneep to give a patient a lethal injection. Schneep, of course, will try and reverse the effects, but when he fails, Anti reveals himself and makes sure to remind him of his mistakes. One time had gotten so bad that Chase had to force himself into the room and snap the doctor out of a hysterical episode. Schneep does not tolerate Anti being anywhere near him or the others.

After learning about all of Chase's problems, Anti decided to become his demons personified, pushing his depression to the edge and even suggesting "solutions" to end his suffering. When he's thinking clearly, Chase can fight back without too much trouble, but if Chase is really beaten down, those suggestions become very tempting. He's paranoid around Anti, as he should be, and prefers for someone else to be around with him if he's in the same room.

Schneep is a doctor, he knows what he's doing, according to himself at least. Marvin disagrees, as he's read up on a few medical books in his spare time, and will be the first to point out anything that seems off. Schneep and Marvin often get into fights about how important magic or science really is, usually resulting to childish name calling until someone's feelings (Marvin's) gets hurt. The two make up quickly, and tend to show they're sincere by watching the other preform their jobs. Marvin will sometimes come to Schneep with a crazy idea for a new trick, and the doctor will do his best to support him, even if he knows it will end badly.

Anti and Robbie don't mind each other for the most part, but sometimes Anti needs a puppet to cause chaos, and luckily there's a zombie that everyone's afraid of nearby. Robbie hates that the only real interaction he has with Anti is being a vessel for mayham, but tolerates his presence anyways, as he doesn't run away in fear.

Marvin has strived to perfect the art of illusion, but isn't too good at it just yet. Enter a psychopathic glitch demon with promises of mastering more than just slight of the hand tricks. Marvin knows not to trust Anti, and constantly refuses his offers, no matter how great they are, but Anti knows he will come around eventually, and if he doesn't, he can find a new use for the magician.

Like his relationship with Schneep, Robbie is always running from Marvin, whether to escape being a volunteer for his latest trick or just wanting to study him to learn about reanimation. On good days, Marvin just wants to test out a card trick and Robbie will happily offer to help, but as soon as the zombie sees anything that's more than what was mentioned, he's good as gone.

[cobra-sigh]

“WebMed” let’s do this thing (i was gonna do lots of pictures but tumblr has limits so there’s more text than i anticipated)

“"Dysphoria" comes from a Greek word that means “hard to bear." People who have RSD don’t handle rejection well. They get very upset if they think someone has shunned or criticized them,”

“What Causes RSD? ... Serious trauma -- like abuse or neglect -- can make the symptoms worse.”

From a young age, Johnny was rejected by the very people who were meant to make him feel safe. His dad, by leaving; Laura, by forcibly removing the connection he attempted to maintain with his absent father and by allowing Sid to emotionally abuse him.

“People who have the condition sometimes work hard to make everyone like and admire them.

RE: johnny and kreese’s entire relationship (i could elaborate but y’all know)

“Or they might stop trying and stay out of any situation where they might get hurt.”

Johnny avoids Robby, Shannon, Miguel (when he thinks he’s failed him and when he thinks that Miguel is "replacing" him with Daniel)

“RSD can affect relationships with family,”

“friends,”

the Cobras scene hit me pretty hard here, because Johnny doesn’t see his friends concern for him, he sees them thinking he’s a fuck-up for letting Kreese back into his life.

“or a romantic partner.”

RE: Johnny abandoning Shannon when his mom died; Carmen, etc

AND ALI; here is someone who for two years cherished Johnny- probably for all the parts of himself other ppl wanted him to suppress (like the ability to be soft and whatnot)- and who (in Johnny’s mind) out of nowhere rejected him pretty thoroughly.

"When you act differently toward the person you think has rejected you, they may begin to do so for real.”

Re: Johnny and Miguel in s4, w/ Johnny believing that Miguel is replacing him with Daniel. It impacts him so deeply that he cannot perform while with Carmen. (Like, literally but he's also so emotionally distraught he can't be there mentally. But also, he starts pulling back from Miguel and we all know what followed there.

“People with RSD may:

“Get very angry or have an emotional outburst when they feel like someone has hurt or rejected them”

Definitely not excusing Johnny's actions here, but the explanation for why he reacts so negatively so quickly? When you have RSD, facing your mistakes feels like facing death- especially if no one taught you to deal with your mistakes when you were younger (RE: Laura emotionally checking out pretty quick, Sid throwing money at Johnny to "fix him," Kreese going straight for murder when Johnny gets 2nd place).

Also I think of Johnny bursting out with “quiet” in s2 when the kids do their snake hiss thing and he can FEEL Kreese’s disappointment.

“Have low self-esteem”

Johnny’s assessments of himself may at points be accurate, but they’re all cloaked in self-loathing.

“Feel anxious, especially in social settings”

RE: all of the situations where he is trying to recruit people (remembering that anxiety can come out as bluster, like esp when it comes to kids bringing up LGBTQ+ issues- there’s some level of mocking there by the writers, but also you can SEE Johnny remember all the times people thought (or he thought ppl thought) “Johnny’s stupid,” “Johnny’s useless” “Johnny can’t keep up with the times”)

“Have problems with relationships”

RE: "that kid is the only person in the world who hasn't given up on me." Definitely not true, at the very least in the form of Bobby, but I'd wager that more people walked away from Johnny because he wouldn't stop pushing them away than because they just didn't like him

“Stay away from social situations and withdraw from other people”

RE: The only good thing about this [apartment complex] is that I don't have to talk to anyone"

“Feel like a failure because they haven't lived up to other people's expectations”

again, i could list them all out but y’all know

seriously becoming obsessed with the idea of Johnny w/ ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)

[natasha-cole]

Hey Bartender Chapter 9: Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound

Pairing: Bartender!Reader x Rock God!Rob

Chapter Summary: Even what seems to be a good thing can’t stay good for too long. Reader thought they were on the same page, so why is Rob being such an ass?

Word Count: 3321

Warnings: drinking as usual, swears, rude Robbie, angst

Catch Up: Chapter 1  Chapter 2  Chapter 3  Chapter 4   Chapter 5   Chapter 6  Chapter 7  Chapter 8

“So, I think we need to talk about what happened last night,” Kim began as she sat across from you at the table. She had called you in early for a chat, something that you expected anyway since you knew Matt would tell her about the fight that had happened.

“Okay, what’s up?” You asked, trying to appear as if you didn’t think it was a big deal.

“Lola, you know I can’t have things like that happening here. It was bad enough the last time you had some crazy fuck hanging out here. I can’t keep you if this is a repeat of that.”

“Kim, I promise, what happened is nowhere near the same thing.”

“Then explain.” She sat quietly, hands folded in front of her as she waited for you to convince her.

“My ex came in here trying to cause trouble for me. The other guy is just a regular, his band plays here all the time. He just stepped in to stand up for me is all. It really isn’t anything to worry about and it won’t happen again.”

“So, I need to 86 both of them?”

“No, not both of them,” you replied, “Rob, the one in the band, he’s a good guy. He’s never given me trouble.”

“His band does bring in most of my business.”

“They’re really good. This place is packed when they play.”

“Okay, but the other guy is done. He’s not allowed here, Matt knows this.”

“That sounds perfect.”

“I don’t know how you manage to attract the attention of creeps, Lola, you’re a sweet girl. I don’t mean to mom you, but you really need to consider the company you keep,’ Kim warned.

“I know. I should’ve been done with him a long time ago, but I guess I’m a glutton for pain.”

“I think we’re done here. See you for your shift tonight?”

“Of course, I’ll be here. Thanks for not firing me.”

“Who am I kidding? You’re my best bartender and a customer favorite. I couldn’t fire you even if I wanted to,” she said with a grin.

“Thank you Kim,” you said again, grateful that she wasn’t tearing you a new one like had expected her to. She was a nice woman who always treated you well, but even you knew better than to bring trouble into her bar.

After your meeting with Kim, you went back to your apartment, not at all surprised that Tyler wasn’t home. This made it easier to collect your things in a few boxes and bags. You had been very serious about leaving, fed up now with how stagnant the relationship was and how he still felt it necessary to keep tabs on you even thought he was obviously interested in someone else. You had let it go on for so long, and found yourself feeling restless now that you had met Rob and finally had a little excitement in your own life.

You had easily packed up your stuff, since you didn’t own much to begin with, and took Briana up on her offer for you to stay in her spare room for a while. It wasn’t ideal, but it would have to do for now.

The strange part about all of this so far was trying to get ready for work tonight while sharing a bathroom with Bri who was also working tonight.

“You wearing that?” Bri asked as she put on her lipstick.

“What’s wrong with this?” Looking down at your outfit. It was what you usually wore to work. Enough to be comfortable, yet low-cut enough to convince men to tip you more.

“Your band is playing tonight,” she reminded you. You frowned, knowing that it meant you’d see Rob again. While you very much enjoyed him, you couldn’t help but feel a little guilty every time you snuck out of his bed in the middle of the night. Not that the two of you were anything other than what you were, but a part of you felt like the man might be catching feelings, especially based on how he had behaved last night.

Briana moved to show you her shirt, the Louden Swain one that Rob had given to each of you. You had both decided to wear them on the nights the band played, to show your support for the most popular band to play in the bar.

“Yeah, I don’t think I have mine,” you mumbled. You really didn’t know where it was currently, and it didn’t help that you had literally thrown everything you owned into boxes and suitcases as quickly as possible in order to get away from Tyler.

“Your man is going to be disappointed,” she replied. “By the way, how is is face?”

She was referring to the fact that he had been involved in a bar brawl with your ex last night and walked away from it with a bloody lip and the beginnings of a black eye. Another thing for you to feel guilty about. Not only was the man a great lay, he had also quite literally defended your honor last night. And you repaid him by getting what you wanted from him and disappearing.

“His face will be okay, he’s still really hot. And, he’s not my man.” You corrected her.

“He will be, now that you’re single.”

“Bri, you do realize that he and I are just fooling around right? I have no intention of being in a relationship right now, especially not with him. But, he’s fun.”

“Girl,” Briana said, shaking her head, “you are getting yourself in way too deep if all you want from him is a fling.”

“I know what I’m doing,” you replied.

“Yeah, but obviously you don’t see the way he looks at you. It’s going to go real bad real fast if you keep it up.”

“How about you let me worry about that? He knows what this is, and we’ve both agreed to keep it what it is.”

Briana shrugged, not interested in arguing with you anymore on the topic. If there was one thing that she knew about you, it was that you were stubborn.

Later at the bar, you and Bri were already busy with the customers who came early for the show. The band, accompanied by a few other people that you hadn’t seen before, wandered in just before their set to prepare. You watched Rob, unable to look away. You hoped that he wasn’t upset again by the way you had left. He didn’t really acknowledge you, and you had to laugh to yourself at the idea that he just might be a little hurt.

Jason was the one who made his way to the bar to get drinks for the group, as he usually did while the band set up.

“Jason,” Briana greeted him, “the usual I assume?”

“Yeah, and a few more beers for our friends.”

“You got it.” Briana moved to get the order ready and you smiled at Jason who was watching you work now.

“Who are your new friends?” you asked curiously as you dropped off drinks to someone near Jason.

“Oh, one of them is Billy’s wife, one belongs to me, and the other one... is here with Rob,” he paused just before mentioning Rob to you, probably unsure if he should even mention the fact that he had brought someone to the show.

“Oh?” You asked, “Rob brought a date?”

“Uh, something like that.” Jason seemed uncomfortable. It was as if he didn’t want to outright say that Rob had a date tonight, but he also seemed to not want to lie to you.

“Good for him,” you replied with a smile. It didn’t phase you. At least, that’s what you told yourself at first.

“Yeah, I mean- I wasn’t sure if I should even say anything. I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you…”

“Nothing’s going on,” you said, “why would anything be going on?”

“I mean, I know you two are kinda- hooking up or whatever.”

“Yeah, we were.”

“Are you okay with that?” He asked, pointing over to Rob who was now talking to the girl he showed up with. She was cute, and very flirty even from where you were standing. She was laughing at what appeared to be an extremely funny joke that Rob had told, gripping onto his arm as she spoke with him.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know,” Jason replied, “I honestly thought you two had a thing going on. I was pretty surprised when he invited her along actually. It’s going to mess up his ‘flirting with the bartender’ game he has going on.”

“You know, I’m surprised he got a date given how messed up his face is after the other night. Oh, and the fact that he’s so awkward.”

“You’re not mad?”

“No,” you chuckled, “he’s not my boyfriend. We were just messing around.”

“Oh, okay, that’s good.”

“Yup,” you said as you placed his drink order in front of him, “have fun.”

You listened to the band as you worked, taking note of how depressing their entire set seemed to be. They weren’t really playing songs that you had become familiar with tonight, instead, they seemed to be on a ‘let’s play every heartbreaking, depressing song we can think of’ kick. Regardless, Rob was still a great performer and you found yourself entranced by the sound of his voice and the way he put so much emotion into the lyrics.

After the show, the band sat at the bar and you focused on helping them, bringing them more drinks and engaging in small talk with them, well, aside from Rob who mostly appeared to be interested in the woman he had brought. You wanted to deny that you were the jealous type, but seeing him with her had you feeling a way that you really didn’t want to feel. Even more, you were sort of irritated that he had even brought her here. You were sure he had done it on purpose, maybe trying to get a reaction out of you. You often felt as if he took this whole thing between the two of you a lot more seriously than you did.

He wasn’t yours. That was your agreement. There was no relationship and he had every right to hang out with other women. But, the fact that he had literally been with you less than 24 hours ago and was now here with this woman, left you feeling pretty gross. You hadn’t considered the fact that he could be fooling around with other women this whole time, probably because you had only been with him and you assumed that your frequent trysts were enough for him.

Any interest that he had ever shown you was no longer there tonight. You basically didn’t exist if you weren’t bringing him and his date drinks. So, you placed your focus on the rest of the guys; laughing and joking with them and doing what you could to ignore Rob.

“Bartender,” you heard Rob’s voice call out as you were in the middle of listening to Stephen tell a story about their last tour. You were engaged in it and felt slightly annoyed as Rob insisted you wait on him.

“Yes?” you asked politely as you approached him.

“We’ve been sitting here for a while with empty drinks.”

“Next time, just ask,” you reminded him. You went to retrieve two more beers, shaking your head as you did so.

“I shouldn’t have to ask. It’s your job to pay attention to your customers,” he responded rudely. You stopped before handing the drinks over, prepared to tell him what an ass he was being, but you thought better of it.

“I’m sorry I was distracted,” you replied, “I’ll pay attention from now on.”

You started to walk back to where Stephen was sitting, still telling his story and you hoped you hadn’t missed too much of it.

“Maybe if you weren’t so busy trying to hook up with every single guy in the bar, you wouldn’t be so distracted.” Rob said it quietly, but just loud enough for you to hear. He took a drink of his beer as he stared at you, waiting for your reaction.

“Excuse me?” You responded, walking back toward him.

“You heard me,” he replied. You swear you saw him swallow hard, almost nervous now that he realized you had heard him.

“Repeat that,’ you said firmly, not wanting to believe that you had just heard what you had heard.

“I said,” he drew out the words, “you’re always all over every man in this bar. Now you’re hitting on my friend.”

“Stephen?”

Rob nodded. You couldn't figure out what was going on. He kept a blank expression, and you honestly couldn’t read him or the situation right now.

“What are you doing?” You asked finally.

“What do you mean? I’m not doing anything.”

“Why are you being such an asshole? One night you’re ‘defending my honor’, getting your face smashed in by a guy who’s giving me a hard time; the next night, you’re talking to me as if I’m just some nobody that you’re not sleeping with.”

“Yeah, about that, I don’t think that’s working out. It was fun while it lasted, don’t get me wrong. You’re a good lay. But, I think I’ve got a little more respect for myself than to just keep fucking around with a random bartender just because she’s easy.”

He stared at you and you could see the hurt in his eyes, you could hear the bitterness in his tone. Regardless of whether or not you had hurt his feelings, he was way out of line. You felt your blood boil at the harshness of his words. He was being cruel, and you didn’t understand why.

So, this is what he really thought of you? You had at least hoped the two of you were friends, after all, you didn’t behave this way with just anyone. You had grown to trust the man and maybe even like him a little. You assumed with the way that he usually spoke to you and pursued you, that maybe he respected you a little too. You felt like an idiot now as you realized that he had gotten what he wanted from you and was ready to drop you before you could even think about it.

It would have been a good time to walk away from him, save yourself from the sting of his words and the look in his eyes. Right now, you had never felt so angry. You weren’t angry that he had brought some other women here tonight, you were pissed at the way he was disrespecting you. So, you did the only thing you could think to do in that moment, something you had always wanted to do to assholes who treated you like shit while you were at work but had never had the guts to do before.

You reached for his beer that was still full and sitting in front of him, grasping it tightly in your hand as you stared him down. You hesitated for a moment, wondering if you would get into trouble for causing another scene in Kim’s bar. You decided it would be worth it. Rob watched intently as you leaned across the bar closer to him; so close that you could have kissed him. you  lifted his drink up and immediately poured it’s contents over his head. You half expected him to freak out, you sort of wanted him to; but he sat there, in a state of shock as the cold beer drenched his hair, running down his face and onto his shirt. He closed his eyes, clenching his jaw as he sat there, almost allowing you to do this.

You could feel eyes on you now; from Briana, the band, their friends, strangers who were just trying to enjoy their drinks. You briefly felt regret over your action, but seeing him sitting there, soaked in beer made that regret disappear rather quickly. It didn’t help to make his words hurt any less, but it certainly made you feel a lot better.

You gently placed the empty beer bottle back in front of him as he looked at you with no expression. You leaned in again, dangerously close to his face now.

“Get the fuck out of this bar,” you said sternly. You could feel your eyes well up with tears. You had no intention of letting him get to you, but you were hurt and despite having just gotten your revenge, you couldn’t help but to still be pissed.

“What is wrong with you?” The woman that he was with shouted. You watched as she scrambled for napkins, trying to towel Rob off as the man continued to stare you down. The other guys; Jason, Billy, Stephen, and Mike watched the scene unfold and just stared, mouths agape and unable to react.

“I suggest you get your friend out of here before I fuck up the rest of his face,” you said to no one in particular, your voice shaky as you tried to control your anger. All of the guys moved rather quickly, getting their things and grabbing Rob to practically yank him off the bar stool. It was as if he were frozen there; unable or unwilling to move. His eyes never left you as his friends made quick work of dragging him out. Just as they were out the door, you felt hands grip onto your arm and you turned quickly, coming face to face with Briana.

“Y/N,” she said, giving you a sympathetic look, “go back to the house, please.”

You nodded, for some reason unable to talk. You couldn’t be sure if you were in shock over the way he had spoken to you or by your own actions. Either way, you felt your stomach tighten and you had to force back tears.

Matt, who had also stood back and watched the whole thing happened, came around the bar, putting an arm around your shoulder as you got your things. He led you from behind the bar, and just as he had always done until recently, he walked you to your car, making sure you got there safely.

You unlocked your car, replaying the whole scene in your head, wondering why you had reacted that way. You had definitely been treated worse, been called worse, by many other men. None of those moments had ever gotten to you the way that Rob had.

“Lola,” Matt began, “I won’t say anything to Kim. No one was hurt, there was no fight, she doesn’t need to know.”

“Matt, I poured a beer on a guy from a band that plays here all the time. Why did I do that?”

“Because he was out of line. You stood up for yourself.”

“I’m going to get fired,” you mumbled, well aware that Rob might be the kind of guy to complain about you to your boss over the fact that you had humiliated him, “I’m constantly a so close to getting fired, and I’m one step closer now.”

“I’m not going to say anything, neither will Bri.”

“Thank you,” you replied.

“Go home, get some rest, and don’t believe any of what he said to you.”

“If only you knew, Matt.” You laughed lightly, knowing that Rob was right in a way. You had put yourself in this position. You trusted someone who was only with you for one thing. You should’ve known how he really thought of you. You should have realized that this could all go badly.

Matt pulled you in for a hug and you thanked him before getting in your car. You watched him return to the bar before you let yourself cry.

Tag List: @lamthetwickster @riversong-sam @nekodresden85 @waywardswain  @capital-eyyyy-ohhh  @narisjournal-blog  @jelly-beans-and-gstrings @grace-for-sale @thecandylovingarchangelgabriel @laffytaffyhumor @feelmyroarrrr  @sorenmarie87  @smoothdogsgirl @kocswain @culturebay @itsfunnierin-enochian @typicalweirdbookworm @angelsandhuntersgalore

[secretliz001]

翻译：Paul McCartney: One for the Road

原链接：https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/paul-mccartney-one-for-the-road-43295/ He blew it. Not that anybody spotted it. The audience at the Rosemont Horizon, outside Chicago, was too busy swooning in the ersatzcandlelight of a few thousand cigarette lighters and luxuriating in the warmbalm of nostalgia as a real, live Beatle reprised one of the band’s biggesthits onstage. Nobody appeared to notice — or care — that Paul McCartney had completely botched the words to his enduringturn-of-the-Seventies hymn “Let It Be.”

他搞砸了，虽然倒也没人发现。在芝加哥外的好事达体育馆，千千万万观众们都忙于举起打火机，在虚假烛光中陶醉，沉浸在温暖怀旧气息里，因为舞台上，一位真实的披头正在重演披头士乐队最受欢迎的歌曲之一。没有人发现（或者说，没有人在意）McCartney完全把Let It Be的歌词唱错了，这首发行于七世纪年代头上，经久不衰的歌。

 “I condensed that little one very nicely — it took on a newmeaning,” McCartney confesses later with an embarrassed laugh. “All I did was,I forgot the second half of the first verse and put in the second verse. And Ithought, ‘God what am I going to do? I’ll just do the second verse and probablyno one will ever notice that I’ve done it twice.’ But I was so thrown off thatI ended up getting it wrong in the last verse as well.” Not that it was all hisfault anyway, he insists with a disarming smile. “I spend most of my timewatching these little cameos in the audience. It’s like all human life isthere, a big sea of it. And it’s a bit distracting. If I get off on the wrongfoot, it’s because I’m hung up on the audience.”

“这首歌我提炼得不错，给了它些新内涵。”McCartney尬笑着坦白，“我就，把下半首歌的第一段给忘了，唱成了第二段，想着天哪咋办，要不我就直接唱第二段得了，大概也没人会发现我唱了两遍。然���我脑筋整个被搞乱，结果最后一节也弄错了。”他毫无防备地笑着，坚持说这并不都是他自己的错，“大部分时间我都在观察观众席。看着人山人海，人类生活都浓缩在那儿，有点让人分心。心思都在观众身上，把我的步骤都弄乱了。”

 And because, he might have added, that audience always was, still is and forever will be hung up on the Beatles. Currently in the midst of hisfirst major concert tour since his splashy 1976 American jaunt with the lateWings, Paul McCartney is digging deep into his half of the Beatles’ song bagafter spending most of the past twenty years pretending — in concert,anyway — that he had never been Fab in the first place. He is nowrediscovering to his eternal surprise, night after night, the enduring impactand resonance of the act he had effectively denied for all those years.

他可能还会补充说，这也是因为披头士乐队依然永远吸引着观众。McCartney正在进行一场大规模巡演，是自Wings乐队在1976年的那场高调美国巡演以来的第一次巡演。在过去的20年中，他一直在假装自己从来不是披头士乐队的一员（至少在演唱会上是这样表现的）。而为了这次巡演，他则深挖了自己创作的，占据披头士曲库一半的作品。如今每一晚他都能重新体验那份惊喜，那份他曾经故意拒绝面对，但是对观众有着经久不衰的影响和共鸣的惊喜。

 It’s not all hot tears and wet seats, of course, like it was in’64. At the Rosemont Horizon, where McCartney and his five-piece band holdcourt for three sold-out nights, it’s more like bright shrieks of astonishmentand deep sighs of contentment, spiced with moments of poignant intimacy anddroll hilarity:

Two teenage girls in the front row gently sobbing during“Yesterday,” a song written nearly ten years before they were born.

A middle-aged couple slow-dancing in the balcony to “Hey Jude.”

A family of three, including a little girl of kindergarten age,holding up signs that read, “We ♥ Paul,” except the little girl is holding the “We” upside down.

The thirtysomething fella in the tenth row holding a cellularphone over his head, apparently phoning in the gig to a ticketless yuppie palat home.

在好事达体育馆，McCartney和他的五人乐队举办了三场售罄演唱会。现在不是1964年，观众席已经没有粉丝们的滚滚热泪和湿哒哒的椅子。取而代之的是快乐的惊声尖叫和愿望满足的大叹，点缀着各种亲情与搞笑时刻：

前排的两个少女听着 "Yesterday "轻轻啜泣，这首歌是在她们出生前10年写就的。

一对中年夫妇缓缓地伴着“Hey Jude”在看台上跳舞。

一家三口，举着“We ♥ Paul”的牌子，不过那个看着才在上幼儿园的小姑娘把“We”的牌子举倒了。

第十排的三十多岁的小伙子高举着移动电话过头顶，显然在给一个没买着票只能家里蹲的雅痞朋友打电话。

 “I’m touching a lot of different nerves out there,” saysMcCartney, quite rightly. “Young couples and not-so-young couples who wereyoung when ‘Hey Jude’ came out. You see lots of guys doing high fives to eachother, a lot of communication, a lot of warmth.

“不同的人对我的表演都有感触。”McCartney说。他没说错。“不管是对年轻的情侣，还是对“Hey Jude”刚出时很年轻但现在已经不年轻的情侣。你可以看着好多人互相击掌，看到各种交流各种温暖。“

 “It’s not so much déjà vu for me. I’ve come back asanother person. I have different sensibilities now. I have kids, all that.Let’s face it, the first tours the Beatles did, the main essential thing wasscoring chicks. I’m a different person now, because that’s not allowed” Hegrins.

“但其实我对这场景并不熟悉，因为我回归时已经成长为另外一个人了，带着更多感情更多见解，有了孩子什么的。老实和你说，披头士第一次巡演最重要的目标就是找妹子而已。现在我不一样了，可不允许我这么干。”他笑笑。

 “And what I find now is, I get really touched by the audience,” hesays. “I keep telling Dick Lester [the director of A Hard Day’s Night and Help!, whois making a film of the tour] to capture all the little things we see from thestage. Nobody in the audience really sees it. But we do, because we’re lookingat them. And that’s the real show.”

“我发现自己倒是被观众感动着。我一直和Dick Lester说要捕捉到从台上向下看的各种细节。（Dick Lester是A Hard Day’s Night and Help!的导演，也在为此次巡演进行拍摄。）我们能看到观众在席内看不见的细节，因为我们才是面对观众的人。观众的反映才是真正的演出。”

 That’s also the crux of Paul McCartney’s continuing dilemma as anex-Beatle. McCartney, 47, has been a solo artist for nineteen years, nearlydouble his tenure as a Beatle. In 1988 he made a welcome return to his Fiftiesrock & roll roots with the Russian-only “covers” album Snova v SSSR, a.k.a. Back in theU.S.S.R. Last spring he released his most critically acclaimed(although commercially disappointing) album in years, Flowers in theDirt. In addition, his recent songwriting partnership withElvis Costello has yielded two Top Forty hits, his own version of “My BraveFace” and Costello’s recording of “Veronica.” He capped 1989 by debuting afine, new touring band featuring top-drawer studio and road guys who couldoutplay Wings blindfolded — guitarist Robbie McIntosh (the Pretenders),singer-guitarist Hamish Stuart (Average White Band), keyboardist Paul “Wix”Wickens (Paul Young, the The) and drummer Chris Whitten (the Waterboys, JulianCope), plus McCartney’s wife, Wings vet Linda, on keys and harmonies.

这也是McCartney作为一位前披头士一直进退两难的症结所在。47岁的他已经单飞19年，几乎是他披头士生涯的两倍。1988年，他推出了一张只在俄罗斯发行的翻唱专辑Snova v SSSR（又名Back in the U.S.S.R.），令人欣喜地追溯回（影响到他的）五十年代的摇滚乐根源。去年春天，他发行了多年来最受好评的专辑Flower in the Dirt，虽然商业成绩不理想。此外，他最近与Elvis Costello的合作了两首歌曲，McCartney版本的My Brave Face 和Costello的 Veronica，都打到了排行榜前四十名。1989年，他首次组建了一支优秀的新巡演乐队，都是优秀的录音室和巡演音乐人，蒙着眼睛弹也能超过Wings乐队--吉他手Robbie McIntosh (Pretenders)，主唱吉他手Hamish Stuart (Average White Band)，键盘手Paul “Wix” Wickens (PaulYoung, the The)和鼓手Chris Whitten (Waterboys, Julian Cope)，再加上他的妻子，Wings乐队常驻成员Linda，负责键盘和和声。

 Yet it has hardly escaped McCartney’s attention that many of thepeople packing arenas and, later this spring, stadiums on his 1989-90 worldtour are not coming to see him play obscure album tracks from Flowers in theDirt. They are coming to see the Beatles-by-proxy. They arecoming to have their emotional buttons pushed by the songs that defined andtransformed their youth — “The Long and Winding Road,” “Can’t Buy MeLove,” “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band,” “Good Day Sunshine,” “Things WeSaid Today,” “Back in the U.S.S.R.,” “I Saw Her Standing There,” the climactic“Golden Slumbers/Carry That Weight/The End” medley from Abbey Road. Theyare coming to see many of these songs performed live for the first time (thebulk of the Beatles oldies in McCartney’s show postdate their 1966 retirementfrom the stage) and, quite possibly, the last.

然而，McCartney当然不会假装无视，其实铺满场馆的人们并不是来听他演出Flowers in the Dirt中稍显晦涩的曲目。他们是来食用披头士代餐的。他们希望听到那些定义并改变了他们青春的歌曲，去触动自己的情感开关— “The Long and Winding Road,” “Can’t Buy Me Love,” “Sgt.Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band,” “Good Day Sunshine,” “Things We Said Today,”“Back in the U.S.S.R.,” “I Saw Her Standing There,” Abbey Road中高潮迭起的 “Golden Slumbers/Carry That Weight/The End” 组曲。他们的目的，是来欣赏史上头次（也有可能是最后一次）现场演出的披头士老歌，大量1966年披头士离开舞台以后创作的曲目。

 At the Rosemont Horizon and later that week at the Skydome inToronto and at the Forum in Montreal, you could feel the audience buzz take apalpable dip every time McCartney went into an unfamiliar number from Flowers in theDirt, like the reggaefied shuffle “Rough Ride” or “We GotMarried,” a Flowers highlight recalling the hard-rock melodrama ofmid-Seventies Wings. The pressure drop was particularly noticeable at thebeginning of the two-and-a-half-hour show, as the crowd cheered the soundtrackof Beatles, Wings and solo McCartney hits that accompanied Richard Lester’sopening rockumentary-film montage with its kinetic blasts of Beatlemania,flower power, Vietnam, et cetera. After which McCartney and his band hit thestage and stepped right into … his new single, the appealing butcomparatively low-key “Figure of Eight.”

在他巡演的各个场地都能感觉到，每次McCartney表演一首Flowers in the Dirt中的新曲目，观众的热情会陡然下降，比如雷鬼风的“Rough Ride”或者 “We Got Married”，令人眼前一亮回想起七十年代中期Wings的硬摇旋律的“Flower”。这在开场尤其明显。观众们欢呼着披头士，Wings, McCartney的solo作品，伴着导演制作的记录着摇滚年代开场，屏幕上展现了披头士狂热，花之力，越战等等。之后，McCartney和乐队上台直接演出新单曲，是吸引人但相对低调的 "Figure of Eight"。

 “We did thaton purpose — we had to do that,” McCartney argues over aveggie burger (the McCartneys are devout vegetarians) during a preshowdinner break backstage in Toronto. “Originally, we were going to open with ‘ISaw Her Standing There.’ But I really got upset by the idea. I was going homeone night and I thought, ‘That’s really betraying our new material, sending itright down the line.’ Like saying, ‘Hey, I haven’t been around for thirteenyears and I haven’t done anything worthwhile. Here’s the Beatles stuff.’

“我是故意的。“McCartney吃着素汉堡解释道（McCartney一家都是坚定的素食主义者）。”本来我们想拿I Saw Her Standing There开场，但我真的不支持这个想法。一天晚上回家的时候我想着，‘这简直在背叛我们的新作品，整个把格调拉低了’。这个安排就好像在说，‘嘿，我神隐了13年，啥有价值的事都没干。喏，给你们听听披头士的歌得了。‘“

 “It’s the obvious thing. Boom, bang, Beatles, Beatles. Then yousay, ‘Now we’d like to do some new material.’ Boo! Hiss! I’ve seen the Stonestry and do it, and it doesn’t go down that great. That’s a fact of life. Evenwith the Beatles, new material didn’t always go down that well. It was theolder tunes. ‘Baby’s in Black’ never went down nearly as well as ‘I Feel Fine’or ‘She Loves You.’ That’s just the nature of the beast.

“真的很明显。如果上来就砰砰唱披头士的歌，然后说‘现在我们想演一些新作品。’嘘声就来了。我见过滚石他们这么做，效果不太好。这就是人生嘛，就算是披头士，新作品落地激起的浪花也不会大，老歌才更能带动人们。唱‘Baby’s in Black‘的效果就没有唱‘I Feel Fine’ 或 ‘She Loves You’好。这行就是这样。”

 “It is hard to follow my own act,” he admits. “But the only answerto that would be to give up after the Beatles. I only had two alternatives.Give up, or carry on. And having elected to carry on, I couldn’t stop.”

McCartney has been consistently productive as an ex-Beatle. He hasnot, however, been consistently successful. His Eighties chart duds include Pipes of Peace,Give My Regards to Broad Street (the soundtrack to hisdisastrous feature film of the same name), Press to Play and thesolo/Wings “greatest hits” package, All the Best. Notably, McCartneyincludes only one song from the first three albums in his current show: “SaySay Say,” his Number One duet with Michael Jackson, from Pipes of Peace, isfeatured in Richard Lester’s opening film.

他承认，“追上先前的成就很难，唯一的答案是在披头士之后就放弃。只有两个选择：放弃，或者继续。既然选择了继续，我就停不下来。"

McCartney作为前披头士一直都很高产，但也没有持续成功。他80年代排行榜上的哑弹包括Pipes of Peace、Give My Regards to Broad Street（超灾难的同名电影原声带）、Press to Play和Wings的精选集All the Best。值得注意的是他本次演出只收录了前三张专辑中的一首歌：Say Say Say，是他与迈克尔-杰克逊合作曲，打上了榜单第一，也在演唱会片头影片出现了。

 Flowers in the Dirt has done reasonably well saleswise — 600,000 copies inthe United States, 1 million in continental Europe by year’s end — but hasnot been the chartbuster either McCartney or his manager, Richard Ogden,certainly hoped for.

Flowers in the Dirt的销量相当不错--在美国发行了60万张，到年底在欧洲发行了100万张--但还没有达到McCartney与他的经纪人Richard Ogden希望的畅销程度。

 “It was as if it didn’t exist,” Ogden says ruefully. “I sat with aradio program director from Chicago, very nice, very up about the show. And hesaid, ‘What’s the next single?’ And I said, ‘We’re just starting with “Figureof Eight” ‘ And he said, ‘What about “This One”? That’s really good.’ And Isaid, ‘That came out in August, mate.’ That really drives me crazy.”

“打单结果就好像消失了一样，”Ogden怅然若失地说，"我和一个芝加哥的电台节目总监坐着，他人很好，对这个节目很上心。他说，'下一张单曲是什么？’我说：" Figure of Eight " 他说"那This One呢？这首很好听。”我说, ‘这首8月份就发行了啊，老哥。’真的好抓狂。"

 McCartney’s response, says Ogden, is a bit stoic. “Paul’s beendoing this for a long time, and he’s going, ‘I don’t want to think about thisanymore. You guys sort it out.'” In fact, McCartney’s response to his ongoingEighties commercial and, until recently, critical slump has been to get out andplay, something he had done infrequently (Live Aid, the 1986 Prince’s Trustconcert) since Wings broke up following his arrest in Japan in 1980 forpossession of marijuana. In 1987, with Ogden’s active encouragement andorganization, McCartney initiated a series of Friday-night jam sessions at asuburban-London studio with an eye toward eventually finding enough new,inspiring players to start a formal band. He also liked the idea, he says, ofhaving a rockers’ equivalent of cafe society.

McCartney的反应倒是挺淡定，他在这一行太久了。他说，“我不想考虑这个了，你们搞定吧”。实际上对于自己八十年代作品商业上的低迷，和最近才上升的风评，他的对应方式一直是出去演出（Live Aid，1986年Prince的Trust演唱会），虽然自1980年在日本因持有大麻被捕后Wings解散以来，他很少这样做了。1987年，在Ogden的积极鼓励和组织下，McCartney在伦敦郊区的一间录音室发起了一系列周五晚上的即兴演奏会，目的是找到足够多新人、有灵感的乐手来组建一支正式的乐队。拥有一个像咖啡公社一样的rocker团体，这个想法他很喜欢。

 “The Beatles nearly did that once,” says McCartney. “We were goingto open an Apple tea room, where we could all go and be intellectual, talk artor Stockhausen. So I thought, ‘We’ll do a similar thing with the jam. Maybe theword will get out that there’s a jam every Friday night, see who shows up.’ Butin fact, because it’s done by your office, and they just ring specific people,it didn’t work out like that. Whoever they rang, showed. Whoever they didn’t ring,didn’t show.”

McCartney 说，“披头士差点就这么干了，本来我们想用Apple的一个茶室，大家都进去开拓思路，聊聊艺术或者Stockhausen。我想着我们的即兴排练也学样，每周五的活动的话传开了，看看谁会参加。但其实因为是办公室组织的，而他们只会给一些特定的人打电话，效果不好。接到电话的人会参加，没接到的就不参加。”

 When asked why he stayed off the road for so long, McCartney saysvery casually: “I just couldn’t be bothered. Until Live Aid came along, Ididn’t think of doing anything live. I don’t know why. Maybe because nobodyasked me. Nobody asked me personally, anyway. I’d hear little things here andthere; I heard that Elton John was quoted as saying, ‘What he needs is to getback on the road.’ But it never seemed that vital for me; I was alreadyenjoying myself.”

问他为什么这么久没有巡演，McCartney反应很随意，“我就不是很care嘛，在Live Aid之前都没想过现场演出，我也不知道为什么。大概因为没人问过我吧，至少没人当面问过我。小道消息确实听说了点，我听人说Elton John说过“McCartney他现在需要的是回去巡演”。但这对我来说也不太关键，我已经很享受自己的生活了。”

 McCartney was never really much of a road hog. Wings’ first andonly American tour came ten years after the Beatles said sayonara to the roadat Candlestick Park. And it’s easy to tell how much time has elapsed by watchingMcCartney’s current show. The production is heavy on Seventies arena kitsch:lasers galore, levitating keyboards. McCartney’s between-song patter alsoprobably seems quaint (“We’re going to go back through the mists of time, to atime known as the Sixties”) to veteran Eighties concertgoers used to thenarrative command of Springsteen or Bono’s spiritual cheerleading.

McCartney从来都不痴迷巡演，披头士在Candlestick Park演出和观众彻底说byebye十年后Wings才在美国巡演。这是第一次也是最后一次。而看McCartney现在的演出，马上就能知道时间过去了多久。这场演出充满了七十年代舞台上的奇特风格：激光灯效，键盘悬浮着，对于八十年代资深演唱会观众，他们已经习惯了Springsteen 的narrative command【？】或者Bono的精神鼓励的，McCartney演出间歇的唠嗑风格古早，“我们将穿过时间的迷雾，回到一个被称为六十年代的时代”。

 One distinctly Eighties aspect of McCartney’s tour is hiscontroversial tour-sponsorship deal with Visa for the 1990 American shows. TheVisa arrangement — reportedly worth $8.5 million, which McCartney saysbasically covers the cost of transport for the tour — represents a new,potentially troublesome twist in pop-music sponsorship: rock & rollsponsored (some will say co-opted) not simply by a merchandiser butby a credit-card company, with close ties to banks and their complex networksof possibly questionable investments. McCartney says he vetted Visa asthoroughly as possible before saying, “I do.” “It may be true that they are agigantic money corporation,” he says, “but I can’t see what’s wrong with that,unless you can prove to me South African links.”

本次巡演的一个明显80年代特征是他与Visa公司就1990年美国演出达成的赞助协议，这个协议其实有点争议。据报道，Visa公司赞助达850万美元，McCartney说，这笔钱基本上包括了巡演的交通费。它代表了流行音乐赞助中一个新的、潜在的麻烦：摇滚乐的赞助（合作）不是简单地由一个商人赞助，而是一家信用卡公司，与银行及其可能会出问题的复杂投资网络关系密切。McCartney在说 "我同意 "之前，他尽可能彻底地审查了Visa。"他们可能确实是一家巨大的财团，"他说，"但我不觉得有什么问题，除非你能向我证明他们和南非之间有关系。"

 McCartney also insists he is not betraying any kind of political,social or emotional trust represented by the Beatles or the songs of theirsthat he’s performing on tour. “Whether you like it or not,” he says, “no matterwhat people thought was going on in the Sixties, every single band that didanything got paid for it. You look back at the early Beatles concert programs,there were Coke ads. We always got paid for everything we did, and when we madea deal, we always wanted the best.

McCartney坚持认为他并没有背叛任何一种披头士乐队代表的政治、社会或情感寄托，也没有与他在巡演中歌相左的行动。“实话实说不怕你惊讶，"他说，"不管你觉得六十年代是什么风气，每个乐队做的任何举动都是有报酬的。你回头看看披头士早期的演唱会，有可乐做的广告。我们做任何事情都会得到报酬，做交易总是希望得到最好的。“

 “Somebody said to me, ‘But the Beatles were anti-materialistic.’That’s a huge myth. John and I literally used to sit down and say, ‘Now let’swrite a swimming pool.’ We said it out of innocence. Out of normal, fuckingworking-class glee that we were able to write a ‘swimming pool.’ For the firsttime in our lives, we could actually do something and earn money.

“有人和我说，‘可是披头士是反物质主义的呀。’这只是个传说罢了。John和我以前真的会坐下来写歌，说“咱们写个游泳池出来”，这些都是无意识说出来的。这种普通的，tmd工人阶级的志趣使我们通过写歌赚到了一个“游泳池”。这是我们人生第一次，确确实实可以种瓜得瓜挣大钱。

 “You get any act around the table with their record company, theytell their manager, ‘Go in and kill.’ They don’t say, ‘Oh, let the punters inat half price.’ We’ve actually done a lot of that — the free program, thatwasn’t necessary.

“你和唱片公司打交道，他们都会和经纪人说，‘去吧，大干一场’。他们不会说，‘欧我们票价打对折吧’。事实上我们也做过免费的项目，不过也没必要罢了。

 “And I think it’s just going to be tough if people don’t like it,”he says coolly. “Stick the finger up and say, ‘Sorry, boys, it’s tough. You maynot like me because of it. Tough darts. I know I’m not doing it for whateverperception you put on it. It doesn’t alter me.’ I’ve taken money off of EMI.The Beatles took money off of United Artists.

“而且我认为如果人们不喜欢，他们就得忍着。”他酷酷说，“我会举个中指说，‘Sorry咯，这事就这样了，你可能不喜欢，但你也只能忍着。我做这个并不是为了你对我的看法，你怎么想都不会改变我’。我拿的是EMI的钱，披头士拿的是联美公司的钱。”

 “I wish we’d taken a little more actually,” he says, suddenlylaughing, taking some of the chill out of the air. “The accountants on A Hard Day’s Night gotthree percent. We got a fee.”

他突然笑着说，“我倒是希望当时多薅点，A Hard Day’s Night的会计都拿了百分之三，我们只拿了一笔固定的钱。” 气氛突然放松了起来。

 “I‘m actually getting tired of Paul interviews,” Linda McCartneyremarks with a shrug while her husband is being trailed by a television-newscrew backstage in Chicago. “People always ask him about the same things. WhatJohn said about this, or what such and such Beatles song meant? Why don’t theyask him about other things, about the important things going on in theworld?”

当他电视新闻人在跟着McCartney在芝加哥场后台采访时，Linda McCartney耸耸肩说，“Paul的采访我都已经疲了。人们总是问他同样的问题：John说了什么，或者这个那个披头士歌曲是什么意思？他们为什么不问其他的，问问世上真正发生的重要事件？"

 For many of the press hounds, radio DJs and TV interviewers following this tour, not to mention the fans who are paying for the privilege, the Beatles are still one of the most important things in the world. In a world still reeling from their original sound and remarkable creative vision, the Beatles’ significance as a cultural touchstone and spiritual anchor cannot be overestimated. In the Sixties the group was the embodiment of youthful ambition and utopian desire amid the graphic realities of war in Southeast Asia and at home in the urban ghettos. Now, with the world plagued by crack, wracked with racial hatred and poised on the edge of ecological apocalypse, talking about the Beatles is like a form of therapy.

对于关注这场巡演的许多狗仔，电台DJ，和电视记者，更不用说付钱来看的观众，披头士乐队依然是世上最重要的事情之一。他们的原创声响和非凡的创作理念仍在影响着这个世界，作为文化试金石和精神支柱的意义是不可低估的。在六十年代，这支乐队在斗争纷飞的东南亚和城市贫民窟，体现了青年们的志向和对乌托邦的向往。而现在，在这蔓延着毒品，种族仇恨和生态灾难的世界，谈论披头士乐队更像一种疗愈手段。

 That seems to be just as true for McCartney as it is for any fan. During rehearsals for the tour, the band would take an occasional tea break, at which point, Paul Wickens recalls, “anecdotes would come out about the old days, little stories about him and John.”

对McCartney来说似乎也是如此。在巡演排练期间，乐队偶尔会进行茶歇，Paul Wickens回忆道，“他会说一些旧日轶事，关于他和John的小故事"。

 But the usual aura of Beatlemania that accompanies McCartney wherever he goes has increased tenfold, at least, with the inclusion of so many Beatles songs in his set. The recent settlement of the band members’ lawsuits with their record company, Capitol-EMI, and among themselves has also brought the tiresome issue of a Beatles reunion back to the fore. McCartney himself fanned that flame at the start of the American tour in November when he suggested during a Los Angeles press conference that with their legal differences settled, maybe he and George Harrison might write songs together for the first time. (He didn’t say anything about writing with Ringo Starr.) Harrison quickly put the kibosh on a possible reunion, issuing a terse press statement: “As far as I’m concerned, there won’t be a Beatles reunion as long as John Lennon remains dead.”

但无论McCartney走到哪里，平时就伴随着他的披头士狂热至少成十倍地增长，毕竟他的演出中加入了这么多披头士的歌曲。最近，乐队成员结束了与Capitol-EMI唱片公司的诉讼，这也重新聚焦了披头士重聚这个老大难问题。McCartney在11月的洛杉矶巡演的新闻发布会上表示，随着他们解决法律分歧，也许他和George会第一次一起写歌。(他没有说任何关于与Ringo一起写作的事情。)George很快就打消了这个念头，发表了一份简短的新声明：“就我所知，只要John没活回来，披头士是无法重聚的。"

 Indeed, John Lennon is an extremely conspicuous presence on McCartney’s tour, by his very absence. His name, his music and his celebrated differences with McCartney during and after the Beatles’ lifetime repeatedly come up in both interviews and idle conversation. Lennon figures prominently in the autobiographical passages that constitute the bulk of the 100-page concert program McCartney is distributing gratis at his shows. But in discussing Lennon in the context of his own contributions to the Beatles’ legacy, without Lennon to answer back, McCartney runs the risk of looking like he’s grabbing all the glory.

事实上，John的缺席反倒在本次巡演中成为了一个极其显眼的存在。采访和闲谈中人们都反复提及他的名字、音乐以及他与McCartney在披头士解散前后的著名纠纷。巡演中免费【免费!!!!!!!!】发放的【多达!!!!!!!!】100页场刊大段的自传段落中，John的身影占重要地位。但在讨论Lennon对披头士作品的贡献时，此时没有Lennon回击，McCartney看着像抢走了所有风头。

 For example, a portion of the program’s interview section is devoted to McCartney’s adventures in the nascent London underground of the mid-Sixties: hanging out with art scenesters like gallery owner Robert Fraser, attending avant-garde music concerts, helping to set up the pioneering Indica Bookshop and Gallery, funding the seminal underground newspaper IT (International Times). “I’m not trying to say it was all me,” McCartney points out in the program, “but I do think John’s avant-garde period later, was really to give himself a go at what he’d seen me having a go at.”

例如，场刊访谈有一部分是关于McCartney在伦敦六十年代中期新生地下艺术中的穿梭：与画廊老板Robert Fraser等艺术界人士混在一起，参加前卫音乐会，帮着打造先锋书店画廊Indica，资助开创性的地下报纸IT（International Times）。"我并不想说这都是我的功劳，" McCartney在场刊中指出，"但我确实认为John后期对先锋艺术的探索，是为了给自己一个新生活的机会，因为他看到了我经历的新生活。"

 “Because I talk about this so much, people go around saying, ‘Oh, he’s trying to reclaim the Beatles for himself, to take it away from John,'” says McCartney while relaxing on the chartered jet ferrying him, his family and the band between Toronto and Montreal. “I’m not doing anything of the kind! I’m not trying to claim the history and achievements of the Beatles for myself. I’m just trying to reclaim my part of it.

"因为我经常谈这件事，所以人们到处说，'哦，他想把披头士据为己有，从John那里夺走它'，" McCartney乘着包机轻松谈到（这包机在多伦多和蒙特利尔之间接送他自己、家人和乐队成员）。"完全没有的事! 我不想把披头士的历史和成就据为己有。我只是想找回属于自己的那部分。”

 “It’s not sour grapes. It’s true. I was there in the mid-Sixties when all these things started to happen in London. The Indica Gallery, art people like Robert Fraser. I was living in London, and I was the only bachelor of the four. The others were married and living in the suburbs. I was just there when it all started to happen.

“真不是酸葡萄心理，六十年代中期伦敦百花齐放的时代，我就在那旋涡中心，在Indica画廊，与Robert Fraser这类艺术人士在一起。我就住在伦敦，也是乐队里唯一一个单身的。另外三个都结婚了住在郊区，我只是正巧那时在那地而已。”

 “The difference is that once John got interested in it, he did it like everything else — to extremes. He did it with great energy and enthusiasm. He dove into it headfirst with Yoko. So it looked like he had been the one doing all the avant-garde stuff.

“It’s the ultimate conundrum,” he admits rather helplessly. “If I don’t say anything, I go on being the so-called wimp of the group. If I do open my mouth, it looks like I’m sullying John.

"不同的是，约翰一对它产生兴趣，他就开始走极端，就像他做别的事情那样。他以极大的精力和热情去投入，和洋子一起，一头扎进去。所以看起来他才一直在做各种先锋前卫的活动。”

"这是终极难题。"他颇为无奈地承认。"如果我什么都不说，我就一直是所谓的群体中的懦夫。但如果我真的开了口，看着就像是我在diss约翰。”

 “And this has only become an issue because he’s dead. Because of the mythologizing that inevitably comes with someone as special as that. And he never wanted that for himself. I remember driving in a car, listening to an interview with John on the radio on the day he died in which he said, ‘I don’t want to be a martyr.’ He didn’t want that responsibility, to be larger than life, to be some kind of god.”

No one brings it up, but this discussion, ironically enough, is taking place on the evening of the ninth anniversary of John Lennon’s murder.

"而正是因为他去世了，这才成了一个问题。因为他地位如此特殊，不可避免会被捧上神坛，可他从来都不想这样。我开车时，听过约翰去世那天的电台采访，他说，'我不想成为烈士'。他不想要那种责任，大于生命，要成为某种神什么的。"

虽然无人提及，但讽刺的是，这场访谈是在John Lennon遇害九周年的晚上进行的。

 “The fact is, we were a team,” McCartney states firmly as the plane begins its descent, “despite everything that went on between us and around us. And I was the only songwriter he ever chose to work with. Nuff said.”

"但其实我们是一个团队，"他在飞机开始下降时坚定表示，"尽管我们之间以及周围环境发生了各种事情，但我依然是唯一一个他自己选择合作写歌的人，就是这样。"

 A day in the touring life, McCartney style, is a nonstop series of interviews, photo opportunities, press conferences, sound checks and meals grabbed quickly by a band on the run. And, of course, the nights are busy, too.

McCartney的巡演生活每天充斥着持续的采访、拍照、新闻发布会、试音，在奔波中随意扒几口饭。当然，晚上也很忙。

 This evening’s performance at Toronto’s Skydome includes McCartney’s nightly plug for Friends of the Earth, the international ecological lobbying group that he is promoting throughout the tour. As the final notes of the closing Abbey Road medley reverberate around the cavernous Skydome, McCartney and the band jump into a fleet of golf carts, which zoom through the hallways to a waiting tour bus. With all aboard, the bus pulls out of the Skydome Starsky and Hutch-style before most of the fans have even left their seats. Back at the hotel at 1:00 a.m., McCartney hosts a small bash for the tour entourage in his suite. The food is vegetarian Chinese. The main attraction is a video of the evening’s Sugar Ray Leonard-Roberto Duran fight. At 2:30 a.m., as the party breaks up, McCartney, wearing a bathrobe, dances alone in the living room to the new Quincy Jones album.

今晚在多伦多Skydome的演出，包括McCartney每晚为Friends of the Earth做的宣传，一个国际生态游说组织。当空旷的Skydome回荡着Abbey Road组曲最后一个音符，McCartney和就乐队跳上高尔夫球车，穿过走廊驶向一辆等着的巡演大巴。大多数歌迷都还没来得及离开座位呢，大家就都上了车，飞速驶出了Skydome，像在演警界双雄似的。凌晨1点回到酒店，他会在套间里为随行人员举办一场小型派对，吃的中式素食，电视里放着当晚Sugar Ray Leonard-Roberto Duran的比赛录像。凌晨2点半派对散场，他会穿着浴袍，听着Quincy Jones的新专独自，在客厅里独自跳舞。

 Sedate in tone, organized with stunning military efficiency, the 1989-90 Paul McCartney World Tour is strictly business — the business of putting on a good show, promoting the latest record, getting maximum publicity and attempting to satisfy the constant public hunger for all things Beatle.

“This is more like a Beatles tour, strangely enough,” says McCartney. “In doing this tour, I’ve taken hints. If someone comes up and says, ‘How should we do this?’ my mind goes back to the best tours I’ve been on. And those were the first Beatles tours of America. They were highly organized, very efficient.

基调沉稳，组织高效，1989-90年Paul McCartney世界巡回演唱会是一场严格的商业活动—是为了举办一场优秀演出，推广最新唱片，获得最大宣传，并试图满足公众对披头士相关的持续渴望。

"挺奇怪的，这倒更像是一场披头士巡演，"McCartney说。"巡演中，我有一些自我暗示。如果有人过说，'我们应该怎么做？'脑海里就回想起我参加过的最好的巡演：披头士的第一次美国巡演，组织得很好，很有效率。

 Where there was once the hysteria of four wild boys with the world at their feet, however, now there is the calm of a middle-aged man who spends nearly all of his offstage hours meeting with assorted advisers, attending to his family (he and Linda are accompanied on this series of shows by two of their four children, Stella and James) and in turn being attended to by personal staff and security, the most prominent of the latter being three muscular, well-dressed men who look as if they had graduated with honors from Secret Service finishing school. Hell raising, needless to say, is at a premium on this tour.

曾经的，是四个狂野男孩带动的歇斯底里，站在世界之巅，现在的，是一个冷静的中年男子，几乎把所有台下时间都用在会见各种顾问、照顾家人（四个孩子中Stella和James这次陪他和Linda巡演），并反过来又受助理们和安保的照顾，其中最突出的是三个肌肉发达、衣着光鲜的男人，看着像特工学校毕业的优等生。Hell raising【？】在此次巡演中很重要。

 “I’m not used to that,” Robbie McIntosh says of the tour’s emphasis on organization. “When I was with the Pretenders, we would do a sound check and then we would go to a pub or something. Now with this, I get a feeling I can’t do that. It’s a lot more regimented, basically because the security is a lot heavier, because of who Paul is. And I guess because of what happened to John, although nobody directly mentions that.”

"我不习惯这样。" Robbie McIntosh提到这次巡演很强调组织性。"当我和Pretenders乐队在一起时，做完音响检查，我们就回去酒吧或者别的地方。现在我感觉自己不能这样做了。一方面因为Paul的身份，安保工作更加严密。另一方面我猜也是因为John的原因。虽然并没有人直截了当提出来。"

 McIntosh observes that the band “is sort of sacred” to McCartney, wholly separate from business. “He never talks business. Never, ever. He’s never mentioned money or anything like that to me. If he’s got something to say, then he’ll say it to the manager, and you will get it from him.

McIntosh发现乐队对McCartney几乎有些“神圣”，是完全与商业活动分开的。“他从来不说商业上的事情，从来都没有。他对我从来不提钱啊什么的。如果他想说，他会和经纪人沟通，经纪人再来和你沟通。”

 “And he’s got a very young approach as far as the band,” says McIntosh “You’d think this is his first band the way he goes on. You see him at sound checks, going around in circles and doing those silly little jumps. It’s a real novelty to him to have a band again — and he treats it like that.”

"搞乐队这方面，他的各种行为都显得相当年轻，" McIntosh说，"他的做法会让你以为这是他待的第一个乐队。试音时你会看到他绕圈圈，傻傻在蹦跶。对他来说，再度拥有乐队是一件很新奇的事情--他也是这样应对的。"

 The sound checks are shows in themselves. McCartney doesn’t run through any of the songs in the regular production; instead, he leads the band through a batch of oldies (Carl Perkins’s “Matchbox,” an old Beatles cover, and tracks from the Russian album, like “Just Because” and “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore”), the Wings B side “C Moon,” the jaunty British music-hall number “Me Father Upon the Stage” and a Latin-hustle medley of Beatles songs.

试音本身就是一场演出。通常人们会过一遍歌单，但McCartney不这样。他会带着乐队演一些老歌(Carl Perkins的“Matchbox,” 翻唱披头士的歌，俄罗斯独家专辑里的歌, 类似 “Just Because” and “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore”这种。)Wings的B面单曲“C Moon”，英式音乐厅的欢快曲目 "Me Father Upon the Stage "和披头士曲目的拉丁风串烧。

 “He’s a real clown,” Wix says quite admiringly. “He loves to show off, and he loves to be there doing it, making people laugh.”

And sure enough, onstage you can see by the light of his beaming, vintage Beatle Paul smile and the way he throws himself into the sixteen Beatles songs featured in the show that no one is enjoying this forward-into-the-past expedition more than McCartney himself.

“It’s twenty years, man,” McCartney says a bit wearily in response to the questions that have dogged him the whole length of the tour — why Beatles songs, and why so many?

"他真的是个小丑式人物。"Wix相当佩服地说。"他喜欢炫技，喜欢在台上搞笑让观众快乐。"

在舞台上，你可以从他那笑容满面、复古的披头士Paul的笑容，以及他投入演出中的十六首披头士歌曲中的方式看出来，没有人比他本人更享受这种向着曾经去探索的征途。

麦卡特尼有些疲惫地回答了困扰他整个巡演的问题--为什么是披头士的歌，为什么这么多？

 “You can’t keep angry forever, twenty years after an event that hurt,” he says, referring to the band’s acrimonious breakup. “Time is a great healer.”

谈起披头士乐队的激烈解散，他说道，"已经二十年了，老兄，二十年前的事我再心痛，也不可能永远生着气。时间很能疗伤。"

 McCartney explains that in preparation for the tour he actually sat down with pen and paper and drew up a list of his favorite Paul McCartney songs, Beatles and otherwise. He came up with so many of them that at one point there was talk, briefly anyway, of doing two completely different shows in each city. “I’d said to myself, ‘You’re a composer,'” he says. “‘There’s no shame in doing these songs.'”

他解释说，“准备巡演时自己真的拿着纸和笔，坐下来，写了一份他心中的Paul McCartney最佳曲目，其中包括披头士乐队和其他时期写的。单子太长了，甚至一度提到要在每个城市做两场完全不同的演出。"我对自己说，'你是作曲人'，"他说，"'演这些歌并不丢人'。"

 The songs of late partner John Lennon were a different matter. “In fact, I considered doing a major tribute to John,” says McCartney. “But it suddenly felt too precious, too showbiz. I was going to have a whacking great picture of John and just say, ‘He was my friend.’ Which was true. I’m totally proud to have worked with him.

演出已故搭档John Lennon的作品则含义不同。“我其实考虑过加一个John的致敬环节，但这回忆对我来说太珍贵，这环节也太作秀了。我本想挥着一张John的照片说，‘他是我的朋友’，这是真的，能与他合作我真的很骄傲。”

 “But then people started saying, ‘Why don’t you do “Imagine”?’ And I thought, ‘Fucking hell, Diana Ross does “Imagine.” They all do “Imagine.”‘ That’s when I backed off the whole thing. You go on tour, you sing your songs, arrange ’em nice, do it, and if you do it well enough, that’s what people will remember.”

“但人们又要说了，‘为啥不唱Imagine?’我就觉得，‘草了，Diana Ross也唱过Imagine，所有人都唱Imagine’。于是我退却了。我就想着去巡演，唱着自己的歌好好编排，如果做得够好，大家是会记住的。”

 Paul McCartney was rather late out of the starting gate for the 1989 Dinosaurs on the Road Sweepstakes, eating the dust already kicked up during the summer and early fall by the Who, the Rolling Stones and even Ringo Starr. But he’s not bugged either about his membership in the club — “I’m another dinosaur,” he says frankly — or by the implicit pressure to prove his viability as a contemporary artist to an audience obsessed by his past, if necessary at the expense of his peers.

【这段的典故没咋看懂，也没查到，有无老师解答？】

 “It’s never stopped,” says McCartney, sitting on a bench in the Montreal Canadiens’ locker room while a sold-out house awaits him inside the Forum next door. “I will never stop competing with every other artist in this business. Pet Sounds kicked me to make Pepper. It was direct competition with the Beach Boys. So what? That’s what everyone’s doing. Although when Brian Wilson heard Pepper, he went the other way.

“竞争从来没有停止过，”他说，在更衣室里坐在板凳上，隔壁漫长的人都在期待着他演出。“我永远不会放弃和这行艺术家们竞争的。Pet Sounds促使我推动Sgt. Pepper项目，这是和the Beach Boys直接竞争，但又怎样呢？大家都这么做。虽然Brian Wilson听完Sgt. Pepper，他就调转枪头啦。”

 “But, yeah, it’s competition. If you put ten children in a room, after an hour or so, they’ll sort themselves out. The smart one. The big, tough one. The cowardly one. The funny one who’s the friend of the smart one and the big, tough one. They will establish a pecking order.”

And where does McCartney place himself in rock’s pecking order?

“I’d put me at the top. Just because I’m a competitor, man. You don’t have Ed Moses going around saying, ‘Sure, I’m the third-best hurdler in the world.’ You don’t find Mike Tyson saying, ‘Sure, there’s lots of guys who could beat me.’ You’ve got to slog, man. I’ve slogged my way up from the suburbs of Liverpool, and I am not about to put all that down.”

“但竞争就是这样。你让10个孩子在一个屋子里，过一两个小时，他们就分出区别了。聪明孩子，壮硕孩子，强悍孩子，怂孩子，以及和聪明孩子壮硕孩子强悍孩子关系都很好的搞笑孩子。他们自己就会分等级。”那McCartney认为自己在哪一级呢？

“我觉得自己是最高一级，因为我确实很有竞争力。你看不到Ed Moses到处说：‘我是世上第三好的跨栏选手哈。’也不会发现Mike Tyson说，"很多人都能打倒我啊。”人必须要努力啊，伙计。从利物浦的郊区一路打拼上来，我不会放弃这一切的。"

 Nor is he about to let all that go forgotten. With the key Beatles lawsuits settled, he’s keen to go ahead with the long-discussed authorized Beatles film biography, The Long and Winding Road, although the project hit an early snag in terms of finding a director. McCartney mistakenly attempted to solicit interest from top screen talent by sending form letters outlining the project to the likes of Steven Spielberg, Ridley Scott and Michael Apted. “George [Harrison], who’s in the film business, went, ‘Major no-no, man, we shouldn’t have done that.’ And he should have stopped me. It was a mistake.”

他也不打算让这一切消失于记忆深处。随着披头士乐队关键官司解决了，他开始积极推进讨论已久的乐队授权电影传记The Long and Winding Road，虽然在找导演时就早早遇到了阻碍。他错了，他试图征求顶级大导的兴趣，他向Steven Spielberg, Ridley Scott 和Michael Apted等人发送了邀约。"涉足电影行业的乔治说，'可千万别，咱不能这么干。’他确实该阻止我，这决定是错误的。"

 Yet having willingly reawakened the Beatlemania beast with his current show, Paul McCartney enters the Nineties with a new variation on his old Seventies dilemma: How do you follow an act like the Beatles — again? He talks of making a new album with his touring band, and he’s halfway through a major orchestral and choral piece, written with British conductor Carl Davis, to be debuted during the 150th-anniversary celebrations of the Royal Liverpool Philharmonic next year. More important, though, he’s come to realize that you don’t follow an act like the Beatles. You learn to live with it, and learn from it.

Paul McCartney通过他目前的巡演，有意唤醒了人们对披头士的狂热。进入九十年代后，他对这七十年代的老难题态度又有了变化：如何重现披头士的行事作风？他说自己会和巡演乐队一起制作一张新专辑，和英国指挥家Carl Davis共同创作的大型管弦乐和合唱作品也已经完成了一半，将在明年皇家利物浦爱乐乐团150周年庆祝活动中首次亮相。但更重要的是，他已经意识到，自己不能重现披头士的作风了，而是要学会与之共存，并从中学习。

 “I’ve already done the thing where you go out and shun the Beatles,” says McCartney. “That was Wings. Now I’ve done this whole thing. I recognize that I’m a composer and that those Beatles songs are a part of my material.

“出门演出，假装自己不是个披头，这事我已经干过了，就是Wings。我现在想要的，是意识到自己是一位作曲人，而披头士的歌曲是我作品的一部分。”

 “The only alternative is that I turn my back on it forever, never do ‘Hey Jude’ again — and I think it’s a damn good song,” he says before heading out onstage, where he’ll play it again for a grateful crowd. “It would really be a pity if I don’t do it. Because someone else will.” 

“另一个选项是，我得永远无视披头生涯，永远不能唱Hey Jude。可这真tm是首好歌。”他上台演出前说着，“如果我永远不唱那就太可惜了，因为会被别人唱掉的。”

[sorahana]

Ooooh! I have a headcanon that kinda is like that idea from the other anon. Sportacus one day stops talking very much, robbie confronts him and asks him what's wrong then sportacus and him argue then sportacus just says he's always taught to be happy not sad and he doesn't know how what he should do!

!!! yes hello I’m 110% here for this

Ever since he aspires to become a hero, he’s been put to the wringer. Aside from the physical conditioning, he had to strengthen his mind as well. Like, how to remain calm under pressure, present a strong front to assure the people that he’s saving and the like. While it did help, he was also taught the unhealthy habit of always pulling up happiness in the face of things that upset him. Even if it’s hard, he should always remain happy.

This worked for awhile but when Sportacus settled down in Lazy Town and really cared for its people, he found that it was harder to remain happy when something made him upset, be it a difficult day of saving or it was something the citizens’ unintentionally said / did. He didn’t understand that it hurt a lot more because he had opened up his heart to these people, whether he knew it or not. He really took a lot more things to heart now.

When it reached a point where he just didn’t know what to do with these feelings of his, Sportacus just clamps up. While he performs his responsibility, he keeps his mouth shut since his tone would be a telltale sign that he wasn’t feeling happy. He should be happy but he just can’t find it in him to do it so now he wasn’t sure what he should do.

Robbie eventually confronts him about it, wanting to know what made the hero (worryingly) quiet. An argument broke out, which further hinted that something was wrong to Robbie because honestly, when had Sportacus ever argued with someone? In the end, Sportacus blurted out his real feelings, expressing his confusion and frustration on the matter.

Robbie would just stare at him for a bit, expression softening before he shakes his head, uttering an ‘oh Sportaloon, you absolute dolt’. Sportacus is once again confused and in his state, upset at Robbie’s apparent insult. The villain pulled Sportacus aside and explained to him that it was impossible for him to remain happy all the time. While he’s a hero, that doesn’t mean he’s not allowed to have other feelings. If he feels sad, he’s justified to feel it and not shove it aside in the name of being a hero. The same goes for other supposedly negative emotions, like anger, frustration and the like.

Sportacus has trouble wrapping his head around the concept. It took a few more visits and explanations before he started to understand. Robbie begrudgingly offered for Sportacus to come to his lair if he felt confused with how he should feel in a particular situation. That led to occasional visits that ended up with Sportacus venting, crying or simply remaining silent, soaking in Robbie’s calming presence and assuring him that it’s okay for him to feel this way. 

He’s a hero but his feelings are valid too.

[3sportsguns]

Painter's Best Coaching Job

Now any program is expected to take a step back after having a big senior class graduate, but ideally a coach has recruited well enough that it is truly next man up. Back track to the 2012-13 Purdue basketball season all remnants of the Baby Boiler class were gone and the Boilermakers entered the dark ages even after, unfortunately for everyone, getting an extra year of Robbie Hummel. This year Matt Painter faced a similar scenario and the coach has delivered.

Preseason predictions did have Purdue in the top three or four of the Big Ten behind the performance of National Player of the Year candidate Carsen Edwards, but after a very rough non-conference slate everyone started to cool down expectations. Purdue was (8-5, 1-1) heading in to the bulk of conference play and, despite the win against ranked Maryland, lost to Virginia Tech, Florida State, blown out by Michigan, had a bad loss to Notre Dame and wasted a huge night from Edwards down at Texas.

The parts around Edwards weren't doing enough behind Edwards no matter what he was doing, and heaven forbid he struggled. On a night honoring Tyler Trent Purdue upset a ranked Iowa team at home but then got blown out by the class of the conference at Michigan State. Something changed in that game. Trevion Williams joined the lineup and seemed to be the only player that showed up, leading the team with 13 points and 12 rebounds. Painter's squad rattled off eight straight and 11 of their last 12.

This stretch of wins included the big one against Michigan State, the season sweep of Indiana and road wins at Wisconsin and Ohio State but something more important has happened. Purdue has figured out how to win even when Edwards struggles, and that is something that seemed impossible at the beginning of the season.

At home against Penn State Edwards put up 21 but the team had 23 turnovers to allow the Nittany Lions stick around after taking the Boilers to overtime just two weeks earlier, but they still pulled out a 76-64 win. All bets are off in rivalry games but no one would have predicted a 4-24 night from Edwards with only 9 points. It was ugly but Purdue fought and saw redemption for Haarms with the game wining tip. Ryan Cline was the leading scorer at IU and Haarms lead Purdue with 17 at Nebraska, a game where Edwards went 3-16 for 13 points. The Boilers still toughed out a 75-72 road win.

Of course no one is predicting a run in March or even a Big Ten title if Edwards keeps struggling, but who would have seen two straight road wins for Purdue with Edwards going a combined 7-40 for 22 points? At the beginning of the season Edwards could do whatever he wanted and the Boilers were still struggling to win against top competition, now the black and gold are winning in spite of their Player of the Year's struggles.

Painter has done and excellent job coaching and putting his team together. Last time Purdue fans watched their premiere players graduate they entered the dark ages and quickly went to the cellar of the Big Ten, but not this time. The last four games for Painter's squad are very manageable and Purdue could be looking at their 24th Big Ten championship. Seeing the players step up with Edwards struggles and a potential Big Ten championship has to have fans feeling confident that Painter will continue to put together successful seasons.

[buddyrabrahams]

Six biggest takeaways from Friday’s Sweet Sixteen games

The Elite Eight is set and we’re just seven games away from crowning a champion. College basketball is coming down to the wire, with a few more tricks up its sleeve. The Sweet Sixteen offered a litany of competitive games, yet the Elite Eight offers something more special – four games that lead to the semifinals in San Antonio.

The NCAA Tournament can feel chaotic, but this late in the month of March, things are starting to fall into place. The Cinderellas clearly have shown they belong and the top teams remind us all why they are so highly seeded. Looking back at Friday’s games can shed some light on what to expect in the rest of the tournament. Here are the six biggest takeaways:

1. Duke zones out Syracuse

Going into the Sweet Sixteen match-up between Duke and Syracuse, anyone could have pegged the game as one that would be slow and ugly. The slower and uglier the game looked, the more Syracuse would have a chance to steal a win.

Both teams leaned on zone defenses, but Duke fared better offensively. The Devils committed fewer turnovers than Syracuse, shot and made more free throws, and dominated the paint. Freshman star Marvin Bagley went for 22 points and 8 rebounds — his third straight game with 22 points. Seven of his rebounds came on the offensive end, with the Orange zone unable to find and corral Bagley all night long.

In the end, the game was slow and it was ugly, but Duke survived.

2. Villanova outlives the West Virginia press

West Virginia’s chances to upset Villanova rested on two possibilities: The Mountaineers needed their press to frustrate Villanova for all 40 minutes of the game, and they needed the Wildcats to have a tough shooting night. The two factors could have gone hand-in-hand, helping West Virginia sneak into the Elite Eight.

The press was effective, forcing 17 Villanova turnovers. When the Wildcats did break the press, however, they were able to find the kinds of shots that makes their offense work. Villanova shot 13 of 24 from outside the arc, keeping West Virginia at arm’s length for the final quarter of the game.

Villanova center Omari Spellman shot 4 of 7 on 3-point attempts. When he is stretching the defense to that extent, no one can slow down the Wildcats.

3. Kansas goes up early and hangs on

The way Kansas scores, it’s easy to imagine the Jayhawks leading a charging comeback with outside shooting and stops on the defensive end. It’s not as easy to see a Bill Self Kansas team collapse down the stretch.

The latter scenario nearly happened Friday night. Kansas led Clemson by 20 points with under 11 minutes to play. The Tigers chipped their way back into the game, getting as close as a four point deficit in the game’s final minute.

Though Kansas never allowed Clemson to even get the game within one possession, the game was a perfect encapsulation of the highs and lows of Jayhawk basketball this season. Kansas is a team of runs and streaks, looking to ride a hot one to a national championship.

4. Another missed opportunity for Purdue

This season, Purdue reached the top five of the AP Poll for the first time since 2010. That 2010 team was derailed when star shooter Robbie Hummel tore his ACL in late February with the Boilermakers ranked third in the nation. This season, Purdue fans again suffered injury misfortune, with center Isaac Haas breaking a bone in his elbow in the first round of the NCAA Tournament.

Without Haas, Purdue was able to fight into the Sweet Sixteen but was clearly hampered. The entire flow of Matt Painter’s rotation and the Boilermaker offensive attack was out of sync without Haas.

Friday night, Purdue looked out of sync all night. Vincent Edwards had six turnovers and Dakota Mathias shot just one of seven. Without Haas in the middle, Purdue shot only six free throws versus Texas Tech.

Sadly, Purdue fans will be left again asking what could have been.

5. Texas Tech making school history

While Purdue fans wonder what might have been, Texas Tech is looking at what could be. The Red Raiders have reached the Elite Eight for the first time in program history. In just his second season on the job in Lubbock, Chris Beard has built something at Texas Tech.

The Red Raiders rank third in the nation this season in defensive efficiency, and it shows on the floor. Purdue was stymied for long stretches of the game, unable to find an open shot anywhere. Tech’s defense matching up with the elite offense of Villanova should make for a fantastic match-up.

Keenan Evans is one of the best college basketball players whom most casual fans don’t know much about. He can change that with a win over Villanova on Sunday.

6. The Big XII is for real

All season long, it was fairly clear that the Big XII was the best conference in college basketball from top to bottom. It can be dangerous to use tournament performance as the only barometer for a conference. At the same time, the tournament can help reinforce or validate what we’ve already seen this season.

With the knowledge that the Big XII is the best league in the land, it should come as no surprise that three teams from the conference are still alive in the Elite Eight, with Kansas, Texas Tech, and Kansas State playing this weekend. Certainly it may be a bit surprising that one of those teams is Kansas State, yet the Wildcats finished fourth in conference play.

Those three teams are proof that surviving the most brutal conference slate in America, a true round robin against ten strong teams, is the perfect preparation for the difficulty of the NCAA Tournament.

Shane McNichol covers college basketball and the NBA for Larry Brown Sports. He also blogs about basketball at Palestra Back and has contributed to Rush The Court, ESPN.com, and USA Today Sports Weekly. Follow him on Twitter @OnTheShaneTrain.

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