#hayden calnin
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that-could-b3-us · 5 months ago
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animezinglife · 2 years ago
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tornbluefoamcouch · 4 months ago
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Artista: hayden calnin Álbum: What It means To be Human Ano: 2021 Faixas/Tempo: 11/41min Estilo: Indie Pop/Folktronica Data de Execução: 29/07/2024 Nota: 6,0 Melhor Música: Politicians
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belwoodmusic · 11 months ago
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Top Ten EPs of 2023
As fun as it is looking back on the past twelve months, reminiscing about all the music that captivated us, our EP list only has one foot in the past, while the other is firmly pointed towards the future. For while this part of out Listmas festivities always finds room to celebrate work from old favourites, EPs are the vehicle through which so much up and coming talent makes its presence known,…
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kaitlinj16 · 1 year ago
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"All I want, is all I got,
But sometimes it grows old,"
-hayden calnin ♡♡
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you-just-said-that · 2 years ago
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Hayden Calnin - Coward | Teen Wolf 4x06 Music
이때 흘러나온 노래도 너무 좋았지. 안 되겠다. 씻고 틴울프 좀 보고 자야겠어. 사실 스캇, 스타일즈 같은 친구 한 명 있는 것만으로도 인생 성공한 거다.
머글 입장인 여러분은 무슨 말인지 모르시죠? 같이 공감할 덕후 찾습니다... 어디 계세요...
요즘 보거나 다시 보는 드라마들처럼, 짝사랑 물을 쓰고 싶어졌다. 스타일즈처럼 막 10년 넘게 짝사랑하고 그런 거 있잖아요. 사람이라면 가지고 있는 모든 판타지가 투영된. 사실 로봇 같은 감수성을 가진 나로선 쓰고 싶다고 해서 될지 모르겠지만 꽤 재밌을 것 같다. 근데 넘쳐나는 사랑 얘기에 뭘 넣어야 참신할지 모르겠는 건 마찬가지. 그 이야기들 사이에서 어떻게 해야 대중에게 먹힐지도 모르고. 그래도 가상의 세계관 설정하면서 골치 아플 필요는 없잖아욧!
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ginnsbaker · 1 year ago
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omg please share with us, I really want to hear your playlist. ☝🏻😭n.
uhmmmm 😶 for in flames, it's here:
IFISS playlist https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2qtyn96CNezq9GhYrTu9ot?si=bb6BOTxpQomyuMVfrN5_TQ
For in losing... i cant share lest i spoil 🙃
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ancestorsalive · 1 year ago
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Eliza Hull - Feat. Hayden Calnin - Ghosts
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horseshoegirl · 2 years ago
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Damn Those Dog Tags: Part 10 - Let's Dance
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📝 Okay, Peeps! This is pure fluff with some spice! I also love this song, so please check it out!
Speaking of songs, I made the official playlist for this fic! Not sure if you guys listen, but it's linked in the master list if you guys want to check it out!
18+ minors DNI. Ageless and blank blogs are blocked without warning.
❗+18, strong language, godmother reader/original female character, original child, sexual themes (I mean Smut, so get outta here if you ain't +18), mentions of a stalker, grieving, and shitty family dynamics.
#7k Words
Part 9 | Masterlist | Part 11
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You never expected Jake to want to take you to the annual state fair for your first date. It seemed out of character for someone like him. Then you realized it didn't seem that farfetched. If he grew up on a ranch in Texas, he probably went to these all the time.
You had been at the grocery store when his text came through. Jake had sent you the flyer, along with a message.
You. Me. Saturday + Dinner ;)
And before you could reply, there was another text. 
Penny was going to take Sadie sailing away.
While some part of you was slightly surprised he followed through on his ask, you had to glance down both ends of the baking aisle to make sure you were alone before squealing and jogging a little on the spot.
It had been a few days since the hallway. Jake and you spent at least another half hour tied up in each other's arms, and you practically had to peel yourself away from him. You were so giddy the rest of the morning, and then some, after you had forced yourself to go back to bed, trying to stay as still as possible with Nat still asleep next to you.
Sitting across from him at breakfast, he acted as if nothing had happened between the two of you, that he was just friendly Jake, leading you to believe maybe it had all been a fever dream caused by the discomfort of the storm.  
But when he went to place his glass in the sink while you were washing the dishes, he slyly touched your hip, letting his fingers slide across the fabric of your jeans just below your waistline, whispering, "Thank you, Darlin'" roughly into your ear before he returned to the table. 
Yup, definitely not a dream.
So while you were working with Penny the day before the date, she didn���t waste the opportunity to grill you about it. Hard. 
“You have a date.” 
You blushed. “Penny..” 
“Where is he taking you?” she pressed.
“He didn’t tell you, seeing as you're now his accomplice?” you countered, trying to finish mixing a cocktail someone ordered.
“Tell who what?”
Your head shot up to see Phoenix leaning up against the bar. "When did you get here? Why are you here?"
“I’m helping Penny with something. Now spill…” 
Penny beat you to it, leaning over the bar and resting on her elbows when she told Nat, “Liz has a date. With Hangman.”
Nat smirked. “Oh, so him pressing you up against the wall in your hallway didn’t do it?” 
“Elizabeth Beck!” Penny gasped.  You squealed, dropping to the ground behind the bar, Phoenix laughing at your antics. “I can’t believe you saw that.” 
“I had to go to the bathroom,” Nat said like it was obvious. “It’s not every day you see your best friend getting rammed up against a wall like that.” 
“Oh, good lord.” 
"Get back up here," Penny tapped your leg with herself softly, you standing up with a blush overcoming your face. She wrapped her arm around your waist, pulling you into her side.
"Tell us," she tried again. "We aren't judging. We just want details."
You relented, quickly sputtering, "He's taking me to the fair."
They oo'd in response, making you shy away from Penny and reach for the drink you made, walking over to the person who ordered it sitting on the other side of the bar. 
Nat followed you, quickly asking, "What will you wear? Something sexy?"
You glowered at her once you placed the drink down. "It's the fair, Nat."
Penny wasn't that far behind, bumping you on the hip. "There's nothing wrong with showing off."
You stuttered, trying to come up with some response that wasn't your usual reply of, 'I'm not like that,’ until someone shouted for Penny, distracting the three of you. She pouted, realizing the conversation would continue without her before leaving you and Phoenix alone. 
“I’m just teasing you,” Nat offered. “I said I would back you up with this, and I will.”
You paused, gripping the edge of the bar. “Does the rest of the team know?” you asked hesitantly. 
Nat shook her head. “I think Coyote knows something. He’s the closest with Jake.” 
It struck you momentarily that this was the first time you heard Nat refer to Jake by his first name. It was always Hangman or Bagman. His last name was even rarer. It might have been a small change, but it showed you Nat was serious about this. It brought a small smile to your face. 
“As for the others, Payback and Fanboy are off in their own world half the time to notice, and Bob is too shy to let on. I can’t say anything about Bradley, though.” 
You frowned. This wasn’t the first time you thought about Bradley and what he might say or do if he found out. He was so heated on New Year's. If he reacted that badly, what would be his reaction when he found out his claims weren’t exactly untrue?
"Can we not tell Bradley? At least for now?” 
Nat shot you a look. “Really?”
“I’m serious, Nat. He was so angry on New Year's Eve. It was scary.”
"Maybe he has a crush on you."
You wretched, the action making you hack. “Ew, no way. He's like a brother to me.”
"Then you should really tell him."
You shook your head. "It's just one date, Nat. I have no idea if anything will come of it."
She slapped your forearm, exclaiming,  "We both know that's not true. You so have it for Hangman. It's not funny."
"It's one date. Besides," you shrugged before saying, "I think it has to do with Sadie."
“Those two have a professional rivalry,” She said thoughtfully. “Maybe it’s extending over to whoever is the better uncle.” 
“God, I hope not,” you shuttered. It was one thing to argue about who the better pilot was. It was another to include Sadie into the mix.
At the mention of Sadie, you looked up at the time, realizing you were five minutes over your shift and late to pick her up. “Shit, I'm late. I gotta go pick Sadie up from Soccer practice.”
Natasha leaned back from the bar, ready to return to what she was helping Penny with but not before saying, “Just think about it, Liz. It should come from you rather than anyone else.”
Saying a quick goodbye to Penny, you clocked out and gathered your bag. But as soon as you walked out the doors, that damn white car was the first thing you saw.
This car always seemed to be there - it hadn’t done anything but park in the Hard Deck parking lot and was driving you insane. You strangely found yourself looking for it when you drove around town. Or in the parking lot of Sadie’s school. You thought you saw it once parked outside of your house but played it off as being paranoid. 
You usually weren’t this suspicious or obsessive about these things, but it was enough to make you feel concerned. Turning on your heel, you marched back into the Hard Deck, Penny frowning from behind the bar when she saw you. 
“Have you seen that car before, Penny? The white one with the spoiler on the back?” 
You could tell she was thinking about it, pinching her eyebrows together before finally recalling, “Oh, it was a nice young man looking for a surf spot. He came in one day asking, and I told him about the overnight rule.”
You heard nothing beyond young man. “You remember the night I closed? You told Jake I was closing by myself?” 
She nodded. “Yeah, that was a little while ago.”
“That car was there then. It would have been too early for surfers.”
But she only shook her head. “With everything that's happened with CPS and that letter, I’m sure you're just being paranoid, Liz,” she said before walking over to the other side of the bar with a drink in her hand.
If you could only believe it was just paranoia.
__
Jake was going to pick you up at 11, and it being 10:30, you were still stressing over what to wear. Your bedroom looked like the morning of the hike. Clothes flung in every corner, hangers hanging off random hooks and knobs.
Everything you held up against yourself to look at in the mirror either felt too plain or too out there for a state fair. You needed help, and you needed it badly. You pulled out your phone, scrolling down your contacts, stopping when your fingers hovered over Ridely's number.
But then, instantly, you remember you couldn’t call her. You slid down the footboard of your bed, back hurting with the effort as your phone dangled from your fingertips, your head hung low between your legs. 
She would always ask you when you called if you had met anyone, if you had gone on any dates, teasing you and telling you repeatedly that you needed someone in your life. But now, you couldn’t even tell her you were going on a date. You couldn’t call her afterwards and talk about it like sisters could. 
She’d never get to meet Jake. To give him a shovel talk like you did with her dates. The two would never sit across from each other at the dinner table, bickering with each other like you were sure they would, their personalities clashing hard. She wouldn't have approved of him initially, much like you hadn't. But she would have warmed up to him by knowing how good he was with Sadie.
But then you spiralled, admonishing yourself for thinking that far ahead. It was only a first date. By the end of today, you might come to find you had a horrible time, and any chance at any type of relationship with Jake would be ruined.
It was only a first date.
And you couldn't tell her.
The sobs worked their way up your throat before you knew you were crying, begging to be let out and heard. Tears streamed down your face, the drops pooling on your bedroom floor.
But then Sadie’s voice carried from your front door, shouting out that Aunt Penny and Nat were here. You scrambled to get up, reaching for the closest piece of clothing to put away. 
Penny appeared in your doorway as you wiped at your face, attempting to fold up a sweater. She carefully walked up behind you, placing her hand on your shoulder. But her touch was too much, and you turned, pulling her into a hug, the tears you tried so hard to stop refusing to listen to you.
"I'm so sorry, Penny," you wept into her shoulder. It didn't help when you opened your eyes over her shoulder, the shoebox was the first thing you saw sitting up on the top shelf.
Penny hushed you, her voice wavering as she stroked your back soothingly, "Nope, you're not apologizing for that. Let it out, Liz." 
"I just..." you gasped as another sob wracked your chest. But Penny pulled back, taking your face between her hands, her thumbs wiping away your running mascara. 
"You'd don't need to tell me. We all know you miss her."
Penny let you cry into her chest for a few minutes, her own tears starting to mix with yours, before pressing a kiss to your forehead and reaching for a button-up blouse lying on your bed.
"Now, come on," she sniffed, holding it up for you. "We will find you the best first date outfit amongst this mess."
She did. Just in time for Nat to fix your makeup and for Sadie to snap a few photos of you with her Polaroid. And right at 11, you opened the door to a bouquet blocking Jake’s face. 
“You got me flowers?” you said, greeting him with a smile when he lowered them to reveal his face. Jake carefully placed them into your outstretched hand, grinning when you immediately brought them to your face to smell them. 
“I’m sorry they're not tulips.” 
You shook your head, smiling into the bouquet. “It doesn’t matter what they are. Thank you, Jake.” 
And then, in something that made you smile, he pulled out a single flower wrapped in a bow from his back pocket. “I figured I should keep with tradition.”
You stepped forward, hand pressing to Jake's shoulder as you pressed your lips to his. Letting Jake deepen the kiss, he wrapped his arms around your waist, mindful of the flowers in the crook of your arm. But you pulled back when you felt his hands sliding down your back towards your ass. 
“We have eyes and ears on us from the living room,” you warned him, jerking your head towards your hallway. Not that Penny or Nat would let Sadie see anything untoward from their hiding spot behind the wall. But you could do without the teasing from them afterwards.
Jake grinned, leaning over to call out, "Bug!"
Turning to face your hallway, you spied Sadie stumbling out from behind the wall like she had been pushed. She huffed at someone, probably at Nat, then comically straightened her shirt before making her way to the door.
"Hi, Uncle Jake," she greeted him, though her voice lacked the usual cheeriness it always had. Jake let you go to kneel in front of her, holding out the flower. "Miss Sadie, will you accept this flower so I can spend the day with your aunt?"
Sadie's face remained stoic as she reached out to take the flower from his hand, bringing it up to her face as she twirled it once. Jake stood up, slightly worried about her non-reaction. But you knew exactly what she was doing, and Jake was falling for it hook, line and sinker.
In Sadie fashion, she finally grinned at him, holding her free hand up to her forehead in a salute, cheekily saying, "Have her home by no later than 11!"
You laughed when Jake saluted her back. Sadie, content with the reaction, ran back inside to find Penny so they could put her flower in some water.
"Was I just given a curfew by a ten-year-old?"
"Yup."
---
The benefit of getting to the fairgrounds a little bit earlier, you didn’t have to wait in line for rides. And boy, were you surprised when Jake dragged you around to a bunch of them. Teacups, bumper cars,  going down those super long slides in a potato sack more than once, you plastered up against his chest. If the two of you could go on it, Jake ensured you did.
A part of you was slightly pleased he wanted to. It helped with the slight nervousness in your stomach, both from this morning and from being with Jake in this context. You had to remind yourself time and time again that Jake was the same as he had always been. But it became easier with each ride, the two of you laughing way harder than you should for a Saturday morning. 
It took your stomach rumbling loudly enough for Jake to kiss your cheek and drag you to the food stands. After asking what you wanted, he told you to find a seat, saying there was no possible way you were paying for yourself. You had huffed at him, but he only pecked your forehead before gently turning you by your shoulders and sending you on your way.
You found a picnic bench away from the stands under a tree. It was the perfect spot, away from other seats, for you and Jake to talk. He found you easily enough, handing you your corn on the cob on a paper plate before placing his hot dog down on the table and climbing over the bench to sit next to you.
But it occurred to you, as you started to nibble on the cob, you didn’t really know that much about him. Sure, you knew he was a fighter pilot, from Texas, from a big family with troubling dynamics. He grew up on a ranch. He was a few years older than you. He had a reputation. 
But you didn’t know the other important stuff. 
“What’s your favourite colour?” you asked, breaking the silence. 
“What?” 
“What’s your favourite colour?” you said again, laughing. 
He shot you a look. “We’re really doing this?” 
“You're the one that wanted to take me out on a date,” you shrugged, taking another bite of your cob. “So spill. What’s your favourite colour?” 
“Orange.”  He admitted after a second. "You?"
“Blue-Green. But not turquoise,” you were quick to correct. “The blue-green you see out in the sea.”
Jake nodded thoughtfully but didn’t say anything.
“This is the part where you ask me a different question,” you roughly whispered, leaning over to tease him.
Jake chuckled, making a show of needing to think about his question before finally asking, “Most embarrassing moment?” 
You giggled at the memory. “When Sadie was born. I was rushing to leave the hospital cause I was late for my shift. The nurse told me I could use the stairwells, but I triggered the emergency exit fire alarm on the door instead.” 
Jake snickered with a mouthful of his hot dog. 
“Hey, they tell you you can use those doors. I was misinformed.” 
Jake shook his head fondly. "Okay, your turn."
“Did you always want to be in the Navy? Flying planes?” you asked, sobering the conversation. Jake looked at you for a minute before staring down at his plate. “Remember how I said my future was more or less planned out?”
You nodded, taking another bite of your corn on the cob, listening as he continued. “My grandfather served in the Navy. He saw how much I didn’t want to follow in my brother’s footsteps and started talking to me about his deployments.” 
Jake grabbed a napkin off the table, wiping away a speck of mustard from the corner of his mouth before explaining, "My dad had been pressuring me throughout college to come home and take over the ranch since I put my foot down about football. I spent a summer with my grandfather up at a Navy base in Fort Worth, learning, watching, and taking everything in. I got to see a little bit of everything, but the fighter squadron... there was something freeing in seeing them up there."
You could tell he was lost in his head, reminiscing about a time when he was trying to figure out what he wanted to do with his life, away from people's impressions and opinions. If you ever met Jake's dad, you'd make sure he knew what you thought about the treatment of his youngest son.
"Then he asked if I wanted to join when I graduated," He shrugged. “One of the best decisions I’ve ever made. He passed five years ago.” 
Listening to Jake recount his story made your heart ache, knowing he would have been expected to live out a future somebody else had carved for him had somebody not shown him a different way. Though it brought comfort to know Jake had somebody in his corner, two people looking out for him if you considered his sister. You reached out, letting your hand graze up and down his forearm in comfort. 
“He was looking out for you,” you offered kindly.
“He would have liked you,” he wondered aloud. “And he would have spoiled Sadie to no end.”
You let the silence stretch on, knowing Jake would need a few seconds to regain his composure. But then he suddenly said aloud, “You said Ridley sent your college admissions for you. What did you study?” 
You swallowed hard at the mention of Ridley, a queasiness settling in your stomach as this morning was still too fresh on your mind.
“English,” you managed to say. “The bookcase in my family room wasn’t a dead giveaway?”
“Anyone can be a bookworm,” he remarked, the look on his face indicating he expected you to continue.
“I wrote a lot in high school,” you shrugged. “Fiction, poetry… short stories. Ridley found them one day after we moved, submitting a couple to a few English and creative writing programs.”
Jake took another bite of his food before asking, “You’re a writer?”
You nodded. “Trying to be.”
“Anything I can read?” He asked playfully, knocking your shoulder. You smirked, pushing back into him as you said, “Maybe one day.”
You didn’t know if asking something like this on a date you thought was going well was proper. But you were curious anyway when you casually said, “Your first kiss?” 
But Jake wasn’t ashamed to answer, not that you expected him to be. The man oozed confidence. “Highschool. After my first touchdown. One of the cheerleaders at the side bench. The worst experience of my life.” 
“I knew you were a jock,” you snorted. 
“What about you?”
“I was a geek - in the library most weekends.” 
“No, your first kiss.” 
“Oh… um..” you hesitated before finally admitting, “You.”
You may as well have sucker-punched him in the gut. Jake turned to face you,  shock then confusion covering his face, as if you didn’t just admit to him the kiss at three AM in your hallway was the first time you’d ever been kissed.
His reaction made you look down into your lap, blending the edge of your paper plate back and forth, before giving into the urge to fill the silence. “I’ve gone on dates. But they never went past the first one. Either things didn’t work out, or I got ghosted. It made me wonder what I was doing wrong.”
Jake cleared his throat. “So you’ve never…?”
He didn’t need to finish his sentence for you to know what he was asking. You shook your head, your blush spreading down your neck. “Does that surprise you?” 
“Someone like you, how didn’t anyone..?” 
“I’ve never trusted someone enough to do it with,” you shrugged. You felt embarrassed, not that you should have been. But it was a well know fact Jake got around. That he was, for lack of a better word, experienced. 
It wasn’t like the opportunity didn’t present itself while you were at college. But the parties and causal thing just wasn’t for you. And all the guys seemed like walking red flags. Your insecurities also didn’t help. But they weren’t as bad back then as they are now. And then Sadie came along, and you put any thought of dating aside. 
“Does that bother you?” you asked meekly, scared of his answer. 
Jake turned, his knee knocking yours as he dropped his plate to the bench, wiping his hand on his shorts before reaching out to stroke the outside of your thigh. His voice was firm when he answered, “Absolutely not. I’m just surprised.” 
You didn’t know you had been holding your breath when you found yourself letting out a sigh of relief. 
“Though I can’t lie, I’m thinking about all the ways I can corrupt your innocent little soul.”
You smirked, shaking your head. "You're a menace."
He returns your grin, unfazed by your response. “Now, what else did you want to ask me? Since we are doing the question thing.”
You thought about it for a second before asking, “What were you going to tell me on New Year’s Eve?” 
But rather than freeze up like he did the other times you asked, Jake smiled fondly at you, hand still stroking the outside of your leg. “What? Me giving you the best first kiss of your life in your hallway at three AM wasn’t enough? Clearly, I didn’t do my job right. ” 
You opened your mouth to respond, but Jake leaned forward, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before leaning back. “I was going to ask if you wanted to start the year off by going on a date with me.” 
You gulped. “You’ve been thinking about this awhile then?” 
“Since Sadie invited me on the hike.” 
The uneasiness in your stomach disappeared with the mention of Sadie, and you squeezed his wrist in silent thanks before reaching for your food. But then Jake said something that made you pause.
“I think she’s trying to play matchmaker with her subtle hints and pictures…” He froze, realizing what he just said out loud. You dropped the cob from your mouth, looking over at him in shock. 
“She didn’t!” You exclaimed, catching on to what he didn’t say. “Oh, that insect! I knew she sent you something suspicious with those photos!” 
“Hey, I promised her I wouldn’t say anything,” he said, sounding guilty for breaking his promise. Then your mind flashed back to the video chat you had with Jake. “Wait, Coyote… at the end of our call..” 
Jake closed his eyes, tilting his head back to the sky as you exclaimed, “Was I the photo in your cockpit?!”
___
Jake told you he wanted to take this slow. 
You had agreed to the both of you taking it slow. 
Hell, it was your first date. 
But damn, he was not making it easy.
After lunch, Jake wanted to take you to the arcade on the other side of the fairgrounds before the two of you had dinner. Buying a bag full of coins, he placed them in the palm of your hand, telling you to pick whatever you wanted. But you wouldn't have that, telling him the two of you would take turns deciding what to play.
But no matter what game the two of you decided on, you were sure he was purposely trying to mess you up by making himself as distractingly attractive as possible.
It all started with the air hockey table. A few occasional glances here or there as you knocked the puck back and forth along the table. Then it was the flirty trash talk, a playful diss being said when one of you would score against the other, leading you to shout out, "Bite me, Hangman."
But he smirked and cockily replied, "I have."
The blush that came next could have rivalled Rooster's angry face.
Next came the basketball hoops. Jake went first, and despite you standing in his line of sight, leaning up against the machine to the side, Jake didn't break his focus as he made every shot. You knew it was a failed attempt from the start anyway, given how focused he would have to be flying an F-18.
Unfortunately, you didn't have much luck when it came to your turn. He came up behind you, his hands on your hips, pressing kisses to your cheek and neck, hoping it would distract you enough to miss your shots and allow him to win the game, which he did.
And out of all things, they had axe throwing. If this man could throw a dart with that much accuracy, he had no trouble with the axes. Watching him toss the axe from over his head, muscles bulging, the look of concentration on his face.
The next time you needed firewood for the pit in the backyard, you would ask Jake for some help splitting it, maybe on a hot day.
It got so bad you had to pull him back by his hand, holding on to yours, right in the middle of the crowd as he was leading you to another game, only to grab him by the back of his neck and lay one on him.
But what really got you was when it came time to redeem the tickets, Jake asked if the two of you could pick something out for Sadie - the Navy-themed teddy bear was looped tightly around the straps of your bag as the two of you walked to one of the pop-up restaurants the fair was hosting. 
Jake went to find a table as you went to find the bathroom. You stared at yourself in the mirror, realizing your worries this morning and even your vocalizations to Jake in your hallway had been for nothing. 
Deep down, you knew Ridley would tell you to stop being so anxious about this and go for it. Jake had already proved, each and every time, he was nothing like the guys that ghosted you or the guys you encountered at school—more than the cocky aviator type you painted him for looking for a good time. Even your lack of experience didn’t phase him and you being the photo in his cockpit? Where did that come from? 
And it suddenly struck you that you were doing the same thing you had ratted the squad out for, what his father had been doing to him. Jake was more than what others painted him for. Sadie had realized it long before anyone else did. Before you did. And it took her inviting Jake to a Saturday night and on the hike for you to realize. 
Who cares about what he did before he met you? Or what everyone believed he should be doing. He was here, with you, and wanted to be in Sadie’s life. 
You were done worrying about what-ifs. Come what may, you thought. You trusted Jake, and you wanted to be with him. In telling yourself that, you realized it was time you allowed yourself to believe in what you refused to admit. 
There was nothing wrong with being in love with Jake Seresin. 
Walking back, you searched the crowd for Jake, finding him seated at a table, speaking with a waitress. You stepped forward, but out of the blue, somebody checked your shoulder, making you stumble forward. Catching yourself on a nearby empty table, you turned around, angrily calling out, “Watch where your going, Asshole!” 
There was a man in a white sweater with his hood up. He didn’t turn around at your voice. Instead, he continued walking down towards the way you had come. You scoffed, adjusting your bag hanging off your shoulder before going to find Jake. 
“And here I thought you might have escaped through the window.” He joked, watching as you approached. The waitress was gone, and in his hands were two menus. 
“As if I’d leave you now,” you scoffed, placing a hand on his shoulder to balance yourself as you climbed into the seat next to him. Once you were settled, you hooked your arm through his, resting your head on his shoulder. 
“What?” you could hear the smile in his voice as he asked, holding out one of the menus to you. But you could only shake your head, smiling fondly into his sleeve as you grabbed the menu from him. “Nothing. I’m just having a good time.”
After ordering and while waiting for the food, you learned Jake was a natural-born storyteller. The minute you asked him about what life was like growing up on a ranch, he launched into multiple stories of shenanigans he and Janet got into, one story in particular almost making you fall out of your chair laughing - Jake telling you he got drunk on a bottle of Rye in high school and ended up walking home, only for his family to have found him passed out in a hay bale in the field the next morning. Or the barn dog everyone hated, a grumpy thing whose bite was worse than its bark. 
"And right there, under all those blankets and saddle pads, was the damn Jack Russell, snapping away and chasing us outta the barn at our heels."
Laughing into your glass of wine, you relayed your own story about how Sadie came about her nickname, bringing ladybugs in from the backyard an empty water bottle and how she forgot to screw the top on. Jake fell into your side, laughing when you explained you couldn’t stop finding ladybugs for weeks afterwards. 
The conversation continued throughout dinner, Jake learning you broke your wrist skating when you were 15. You learned exactly what his father had planned for him until his grandfather stepped, only furthering your dislike for the man. While you already knew both of you had the same taste in music, you weren’t surprised Jake had a soft spot for country music.
And when your meal was finished, Jake led you out of the makeshift tent; his arm lopped through yours as you snuggled happily up against his side. When you moved towards the parking lot, Jake tugged on your hand, pulling you back into his chest, saying, “I have one more thing planned.”
Yet, when he dragged you over to the line for the Ferris wheel, you felt like you were going to throw up. And you tried, you really did, not to let on that you were terrified to go up in the air. This date was going wonderfully, and you didn’t want to ruin it with something so trivial as this.
So you waited in line with him, listening to him continue the conversation about how he realized he wasn’t meant for football like his brother, even though he loved to watch. But every time the machine stopped and the seats, carts, or cars, whatever they were called, swung with the momentum, you had to force yourself not to jolt.
When your turn came in the line, you tried not to grip Jake’s hand tighter than you should when he helped you into your seat. To loosen your shoulders from being too tight and slouch your back when it was too straight. And when it started to move, you shot your hands out wide, one going for the bar in front of Jake, the other to your side of the cart.
When it stopped, you swallowed hard. Jake looked at you, amused, before finally stating, “You’re afraid of heights.” 
“Not really…” you said, looking over the side, wondering how quickly the maintenance crew put up the blasted thing and if they had any missing blots or screws afterwards. 
“Come now, you can tell me,” he leaned forward, placing his hand on your wrist of the hand gripping the handlebar. He pressed his nose against your ear, his voice buzzing as he said lowly, “I won’t judge.” 
Something metal creaked beneath you, making you jolt, your hand now covering your heart. “It’s not really heights.” 
“No?” he murmured lowly. You knew what he was doing, the cocky fucker. No amount of distraction or persuasion would get your mind off the empty space below you. Or get you to admit something you knew he would most definitely take some sort of defence to. 
Or worse, try and fix it. Which he was capable of doing. 
Jake suddenly rocked back in the seat back, hard. You squealed, plastering yourself into his side, gripping his body tight as you exclaimed, “Flying! I have a fear of flying!”
His hand slid down from over the back seat, finding your hip bone and gripping it tight, tugging you closer. “Now, was that so bad?” 
Hiding your face into his shoulder, you replied, “Yes, especially after what you told me. And you're a pilot.” 
“A pilot who could help you get over this fear.” 
You shook your head against his chest. “Nope. I’m not stepping foot in that thing.”
“You wound me, darling,” he said, exasperated. “Truly.”
“It’s not that I’m against it,” you replied, adjusting yourself against his side, Jake’s hands making sure there wasn’t an inch between the two of you.
“Mav’s offered countless times when he takes Sadie up … I don’t know,” you finished lamely. “I just can’t stand the thought of no ground beneath my feet.”
"I bet I could change your mind."
“Not going to happen,” you challenged back. 
“Nope, I guarantee you, I will get you into a plane."
You laughed hoarsely at his words. “Jake…” 
“You and me, our next date. I’m calling it.” 
“Maybe I’ll sit in it. But that’s it.” 
“Nope. If you’re dating a pilot, you must take advantage of that.”
“What about you?” you asked, hoping to get him off-topic. “What are you afraid of?”
But Jake’s laughter died down, his eyes unfocused stared off into the distance. It wasn’t that he didn’t know - The same fear had followed him since high school, on deployments and in the quiet hours when nobody else was around. If he said it out loud, it would, without a doubt, give it power. 
And if it had power, it would ruin his chances with you.
You gave him a few minutes, figuring he needed time to think about it. “Is it a hard one?
“Look,” he jutted his head forward. You sat up, turning your head to look out over the field, expecting to find something weird. But you didn’t need to search the crowd or look through the stands. It was obvious what Jake was pointing out to you. 
“Whoa.”
Even if it freaked you out, Jake timed the Ferris Wheel perfectly. The sunset was gorgeous, with streaks of soft pastel yellows, pinks, and even hints of purple. The blue was even gentler than the bright hue of the everyday sky. 
“It’s so….” you started, but couldn’t finish. You were too in awe of the sight in front of you. 
“Beautiful,” he finished for you. It certainly is, you thought. But when you glanced over at him, you caught his eyes on you.
“You’re not watching the sunset, are you?” 
“Nope.”
You blushed, deciding to press your cheek back into his chest and gazing at the sky. You could get used to this, you thought, as Jake grabbed the junction of your knee, pulling your legs over his. 
With the movement or sounds of creaking metal no longer bothering you, you felt content to snuggle into Jake’s side as the Ferris Wheel swung you both forward again. 
He pressed his lips to your forehead, murmuring, “I’m still getting you on a plane.” 
“Jake…” 
___
The sun had set when Jake and you got off the Ferris wheel. He led you back to his truck with an arm around your waist, content to press the occasional kiss into your hair as the pair of you navigated the crowds.
Jake guided you to the passenger side when you reached the truck. The both of you were hidden out of view from any on-lookers who were heading home. You pressed yourself up against the side as he reached for the handle, ever the gentleman, to open the door and help you up into your seat. But as he turned his head to look at you, you held your head up to look at him with a shy smile. 
That shy smile, and the way the light hit the corners of your eyes, had him sucking in a sharp breath. His hand lost its grip, sliding along the side of the truck as he slowly stepped toward you. Watching as he approached you with a heated gaze, you timidly bit the bottom of your lip.
You couldn't see the stars behind his head, nor the lights from the fairgrounds or the warm glow of the string lights making up the parking lot. You could only see him towering over you, his arm stretching out to rest above your head, cocooning between him and the truck. His other hand landed on your cheek, his thumb softly stroking the skin, then gently releasing your lip from its hold before replacing it with his lips.
Moaning against his mouth, you slid your hand up his chest. It was a slow kiss, Jake's tongue tracing the inside of your mouth as if the two of you had all the time in the world.
Jake's hand slithered down your side, finding a grip on your leg. The heel of your boot caught on the step of the truck at his touch, allowing Jake the space he needed to situate himself between your legs, pinning you up against the frame. He nibbed at your neck, teeth working on marking up the opposite side of his handiwork from the hallway. There were bruises, much to your pleasure or displeasure, and you had spent at least half an hour each morning since covering it up. And Jake clearly wanted to add more to it.
But it didn’t stop you from attempting to return the favour, as your mouth managed to land on Jake’s cheek, working down towards his jawline as he tilted his head back. You felt the small spikes of a five o’clock shadow under your soft lips, pressing kisses to his skin. Then in a tiny spark of confidence, you closed them around a patch of skin.
“Fuck Liz,” he growled out, hand tightening on your thigh. “We need to go slow. What happened to not putting out on the first date?”
You let his neck go with a sharp intake of breath. "This is slow."
"Slow is driving you home, walking you to your front door," rasped after a kiss, diving back for another one before adding, "Kissing you goodnight and asking when I can see you again."
“Then why were you teasing me all day?” you gasped out. “I’m just following your lead.”
Jake pulled sharply back, the hand above your head thumping hard on the metal. “I’m not taking you up against my truck in the middle of a dirt parking lot for your first time.”
"Stereotypes are overrated."
Jake growled. You were driving him crazy, testing his resolve, especially after what you admitted to him earlier. It only confirmed he needed to take this slow with you.
Then again, another part of him was elated that he'd be the only one to have ever touched you like this, to feel you like this. That the sounds rising from your body were only because of him.
After securely wrapping your leg around his waist, Jake went for the center of your blouse, fingers single-handly making quick work of the small buttons.
"You would, wouldn't you?"  He groaned, fingers searching underneath the helm for the top of your bra before giving a sharp tug down, exposing your nipple to the air. You gasped at the action, the night air caressing your skin. 
"Let me do this to you out in the middle of nowhere," he murmured against your skin in between kisses, working inch by inch down to your breast.  "Where anyone could walk by."
In three seconds, Jake had your entire breast in his mouth, jaw tense as he sucked hard, his tongue toying with your nipple. You mewled, not used to the sensation.
"Fuck Jake," you whimpered, your head hitting the door as you looked up to the stars, blindly raking your fingers through his hair. 
He let it go with a pop. "Pay attention, darlin'. My eyes are down here."
Dropping your chin to your chest, you got a close-up view of Jake staring up at you, lips enclosing around the peak of your breast to work the bud between his teeth lightly. A wail caught in your throat at a particular tug, eyes still focused on his face as you attempted to bring him closer to your chest.
He pulled back, voice husky as he said, "Good girl."
You heaved at the praise, a flush of heat shooting down your body. You started to rock your hips against his, desperate for pressure, friction, anything to soothe the burning sensation in your core. Your jeans prevented you from feeling anything as Jake continued to suck around your nipple.
"Or you'd let me do this."
You moaned, a long yearning sound echoing between the space of the two parking spots when Jake slipped his hand down between your bodies and cupped your core, his thumb pressing on your clit through the seam of your jeans.
"Or this," he chuckled when you bucked your hips off the side of the truck, you seeing more than the stars littering the sky as he rubbed at you with the pad of his thumb. But his hand was gone as quickly as he touched you, leaving you aching and whining for more.
Jake could only think about how beautiful you looked, panting hard and skin flushed, just as affected as he was.  He was in awe of you, of how well today went, how you care about him and refuse to believe in how everyone else sees him. He may have needed to assure you you were worth the risk of a broken heart, but he was grateful you were willing to take the chance on him. 
But then you fucking sidelined him; your voice was quiet and raspy as you said, “I trust you.” 
It was three simple words. And you probably didn’t understand their weight in your frenzied state. Or maybe you did. You told him you didn’t trust many people with this part of you. Perhaps you were telling him he was that person. 
Either way, they meant everything to him.
“I want to do this right by you,” he gritted out through his teeth. “But you are making it hard.”
You didn't mean to, but your snicker escaped before it was too late, causing a series of giggles to wrack your chest.
Jake instantly caught on to what you were laughing about, the heat building between you both starting to die down as he softly laughed with you, body shaking as he pressed his forehead into the center of your chest.
"Liz, don't you dare."
But you couldn't help yourself. "Pun intended?"
He went for your sides, fingers poking and scratching at your stomach as you let out a screech, failing to escape his wrath before you finally called out for mercy. Pulling your bra and blouse back over your breast, Jake sighed affectionally, pressing his forehead to yours. "Where have you been all my life, darlin'?"
You didn't know what to say, so you pressed your lips to his, content to simply be in the moment, even if the two of you looked like horny teenagers at a school fair.
Thank god nobody could see the two of you like this right now.
But you were seen. 
From the driver’s seat of a little white car with a spoiler on the back, parked three cars down on the opposite side of the lane. It’s passenger watching you and that man, doing whatever the fuck that was, up against that specimen of a truck.
He could hear your laughter from this distance, watching as the man picked you up, you clinging to him all arms and legs as he opened the door and set you inside, closing it before jogging around to the other side. 
Watching the truck drive away, he couldn't help but feel some sort of pleasure in the fact he would see you soon. At the place where you were the most vulnerable. When none of those glorified uniform-wearing servants would be able to stop him.
Yes, he would see you soon.
And he wouldn’t leave this godforsaken state without what he came for. 
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Shit hits the fan from here on out... 👀
Tags:
@blue-aconite @tinytotontheoversizedpony @djs8891 @caitsymichelle13 @startrekfangirl2233
@mayhemmanaged @ereardon @dempy @shanimallina87 @teacupsandtopgun @daggerspare-standingby
@phantomxoxo @formulapierre @eli2447 @fulla02 @blckgrl-sunflower @mizzzpink @ohgodnotagainn
@bubblegumbeautyqueen @sarahsmi13s @desert-fern @lynnestra44 @memoriesat30 @penwieldingdreamer @mxlanciia
@bradleybeachbabe @bobby-r2d2-floyd @lavenderbradshaw @roosters-girl @lovinglyeternal @genius2050
@brooke-stinson
Part 11: Dream On Coming Soon
Wickett ;)
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siren-of-agony · 3 months ago
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Ready To Comply
The Winter Soldier's last mission. | slight Stucky vibes but mostly fighting the conditioning.
Longing - Kurt Uenala / Rusted - Kayak Jones / Seventeen - Sir Chloe / Daybreak - Pallbearer / Furnace - Martin Stig Andersen / Nine - Sleeping At Last / Benign - With Teeth / Homecoming - Chris Linton / One - Harry Nilsson / Freight Train - Sara Jackson-Holman // The Winter Soldier - Henry Jackman //// Not Human - elegant slims / Poor Isaac - The Airborne Toxic Event / Lose Your Soul - Dead Man's Bones / Dead In This House - IAMX / Bullet Proof.. I Wish I Was - S. Carey / Splintered - Aisha Badru / Killer - The Hoosiers / Kitchen Fork - Jack Conte / Where Is My Mind - Safari Riot / Expectations - Sir Sly / empty crown - YAS / the Simplest Words - The Narcissist Cookbook / Asleep (Acoustic) - Sleeping At Last / Superhero - Johnny Hollow / Woke Up A Rebel - Reuben And The Dark / Fallin Infinite - Black Math / Elsa's Song - The Amazing Devil / Bullet With Butterfly Wings - Karen O / Bioluminescent - Softwire / I am the Antichrist to You - Kishi Bashi /Souls on Fire - Mad Gallica / железо поёт - Flёur / Older - Autoheart / Real Pain - Indigo De Souza / Human - Daughter //// Farewell To Bucky - Alan Silvestri // End - Hayden Calnin / Of - Nrthrn / The Line - Aure
I couldn't find a playlist that used the Winter Soldier's activation code so I simply made one. Working in these restraints was actually very fun and I have to say, I'm incredibly proud of this one. I feel like all the songs I picked for his words work both musically and lyrically and the order of the other ones was picked very deliberately as well. Normally this kind of rant goes in the tags but I wanted to include it here to ask that if you ever listen to a playlist of mine from start to finish, make it this one :D
___________________________________________ Taglist: @gottawhump @painsandconfusion @bright-whump @whumpwillow @dont-touch-my-soup @mostlydeadallday @kim-poce @lonesome--hunter @getyourwhumphere @not-your-housekeeper98 @yesthisiswhump @waitingforrescue @i-can-even-burn-salad @lazy8whump @painful-pooch (If you want to be taken off or included for coming playlists, please let me know!)
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bellaxgiornata · 9 months ago
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So I've been dealing with an elevated heart rate and apparently very low blood pressure today which has been making me really dizzy. I'm supposed to be trying to relax, so what am I doing? Working on this weird angst to eventually fluff two (or three?) part thing that won't GET OUT OF MY HEAD for Matt. Like for real, I can't focus on anything else (or maybe that's the low blood pressure).
So anyway, here's just a bit of the playlist I'm listening to while I work on it, trying to further fuel my angsty mood today for anyone curious.
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If We're Being Honest Playlist
"If We're Being Honest" by Novo Amor
"Fear of the Water" by SYML
"Missing the Mark" by Aquilo
"Seeds" by Yoke Lore
"Where's My Love" by SYML
"Repeat Until Death" by Novo Amor
"Lover of Mine" by John Vincent III
"Unfortunate Love" by Hayden Calnin
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that-could-b3-us · 2 years ago
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bluestar22x · 5 months ago
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Alien Son Masterlist
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Series Summary: Unbeknownst to him, Cade was a product of an experiment with the goal of raising a super solider. Saved from that fate by his adoptive parents, he is still hunted. Eventually, as it always does, his past catches up with him, though now there's another plan for him, one he could've never imagined.
With the help of friends, Cade must escape his captors again, resuming his life on the run in hopes of finally ending it once and for all, before another generation of his family line has to suffer the consequences.
Rating: 18+ series (explicit content, sensitive topics)
Warnings/General Info: Science fiction, mpreg (due to fictional science), violence, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, friendship (found family), romance (male x female), eventual love scene, violation of autonomy (by the antagonists), cloning, inter-species relationship (sort of - Cade is part human/more human than not), xenophobia, alien super human abilities
--- Don't like, don't read or comment! ---
Author's Note: I wrote this a few years ago, never intending to really show this to anyone, but then I saw this Joel Miller Fanfic and the request that it spawned from, and I couldn't help but think maybe I could share this story on tumblr.
This is an original character story, created long before I became a part of the Pedro character fandom, but the main lead does have Latino/Hispanic heritage by coincidence.
The idea for this formed from wanting an mpreg story that wasn't treated like a joke or too over the top. I wanted to write something someone who isn't really into mpreg might enjoy anyway, because that's not all this is about. It's about friendship and family (and some cruel mad scientists).
I'm a very sentimental person. What drew me to mpreg was seeing a softer side to a male character (specifically one born male) - that's all. Plus it makes for some humorous freaking out because bio males aren't supposed to fill this role, blah, blah, blah. I really enjoy making the boys weirded out by the flipped role situation (hopefully their reactions feel realistic - this is why this is an original character fic instead of a fanfic).
Cade And Kamilah aren't really based on any characters, but Noah has a little hint of Dean Winchester (SPN) in him. Cool guy, even cooler leather jacket. ;)
xxx
Chapter 1: Found
Chapter 2: The Facility
Chapter 3: The Aliens Among Us
Chapter 4: Mara
Chapter 5: Kamilah
Chapter 6: The Plan
Chapter 7: Clone
Chapter 8: Purgatory
Chapter 9: Connection
Chapter 10: The Escape
Chapter 11: Detective
Chapter 12: Doctor Hill
Chapter 13: The Beginning
Chapter 14: New Orleans
Chapter 15: Breakfast
Chapter 16: The Ambush
Chapter 17: Concern
Chapter 18: Bigfoot Town
Chapter 19: Fourteen Weeks
Chapter 20: Union
Chapter 21: Movement
Chapter 22: Noah
Chapter 23: Awake
Chapter 24: Goodbye, San Francisco
Chapter 25: The Grand Canyon
Chapter 26: Fear
Chapter 27: Birthday
Chapter 28: Redfield
Chapter 29: The Return
Chapter 30: Captured
Chapter 31: The Rescue
Chapter 32: Decisions
Chapter 33: Family
Chapter 34: Restless Flight
Chapter 35: Switzerland
Chapter 36: Haflingers
Chapter 37: Doctor's Appointment
Chapter 38: Pain
Chapter 39: Hope
Epilogue
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Extended Scenes/Post Series One Shots
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Music Inspo List
Some Days - Brent Morgan
Time Moves On – Phantom Planet (1st 15 seconds – highway travel song inspo)
Lean On Me – J2
The Fixer - Brent Morgan
Make You Feel My Love - Adele
We’re In This Together Now – Loving Caliber
Warm With You - Hayden Calnin
I Guess I'm In Love - Clinton Kane
What Dreams Are Made Of - Brent Morgan
In My Blood - The Score
Blink - Revive
On My Way (Marry Me) - Jennifer Lopez
xxx
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tornbluefoamcouch · 6 months ago
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Artista: Hayden Calnin Álbum: Cut Love (Pt. 2) Ano: 2016 Faixas/Tempo: 09/38min Estilo: Indie pop Data de Execução: 04/06/2024 Nota: 7,0 Melhor Música: Park beers
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honeyed-latte · 11 months ago
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"For My Help." By Hayden Calnin
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leslieseveride · 6 months ago
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