#hawkeye pierce mash fans you already know what i mean

[mourningmaybells]

so many hot men lined up for this role and envisioned in this role and getting this role and for what. for what?? just because the exorcist's book said the priest was handsome???

[piratewithvigor]

Out Of Sight, Out Of Our Minds: Chapter 1

Summary: After a freak accident lighting a stove, Hawkeye suffered severe flash burns that have left him blinded. Most people recover within a week or so, but as the days drag on, BJ becomes more convinced that Hawkeye isn’t most people.

Word Count: 2050

A/N: This is a birthday present for the wonderful @the--blackdahlia​ who inspired me to get back into a writing groove after months of inactivity. It’s a retelling of the season 5 episode “Out Of Sight, Out Of Mind”, so there will definitely be spoilers ahead.

BJ had never liked baseball all that much. He was a little too scrawny as a kid to play with the others and listening to games on the radio bored him senseless. That never stopped Peg from dragging him to Seals Stadium on the weekends he couldn’t come up with any work-related excuse. She’d been a fan ever since the AAGPBL had established a team in her hometown of Kenosha and though her loyalties changed upon her move to San Francisco with BJ, her craze for the game had never wavered. BJ never exactly wanted to spend his afternoons in a ballpark that was too hot and sunny, watching a game that always felt just a little too long, but watching Peg get so thrilled was worth the three dollars he spent on the tickets. 

Of course, it wasn’t late in the afternoon, nor was it warm, and he wasn’t seated in the plastic chairs of the ball park. It was nearly three in the morning, with a chill breezing through his tent in Korea and Peg wasn’t there making the sounds of baseball bearable. He’d heard Hawkeye mumble at Frank to turn off the radio at least a dozen times and no matter how firmly he pressed his thin pillow against his ears, information about the bout between the Dodgers and the Giants kept leaking in. It didn’t even seem like Frank actually cared who won. Just what the score was. He never cheered, not even the little hissed ‘yes’ when either team scored like Peg did. It sounded more like he was just listening to know. Especially when BJ heard the tell-tale scratch of a pencil against paper. Probably some kind of slimy scheme to get ahead in life, as Frank was known to do. But this late at night, BJ couldn’t bring himself to care. The only thing he heard that made him smile was the announcement of the 4-3 concluding score and the promise of a rebroadcast at noon. 

“Shut it off, Frank,” Hawkeye mumbled, pulling his thin blankets further over himself. “It’s 4-3 in the morning.”

“Stop dreaming and go back to sleep,” Frank shot back, switching off the little radio as he moved around in bed, assumedly trying to find a position on the cot that would retain body heat, but also fit between the limits.

“That makes good nonsense.”

BJ loved Hawkeye, really, he did, but the man had a serious problem with always needing the last word. 

Now that the static-filled broadcast had been shut off, the tent seemed almost quiet. Korea was never dead silent, BJ had learned, but he took what he could where he could get it. As long as they weren’t being actively fired upon and there were no choppers going overhead, it was quiet in his books. He was finally starting to doze off when the door to the Swamp opened and at least two pairs of feet scuttled in. BJ hoped to God they were just very large rats. Rats didn’t make much noise besides the occasional squeak of fright. 

“Hawkeye?”

Rats didn’t ask for doctors by name.

Rats.

“Wake up, Hawkeye, the stove in our tent went out.”

“Again?”

This wasn’t the first time the nurses had had issues with their stove this winter. It only happened once or twice when it first started getting cold, but when the winds got more violent, the stove seemed to be going out once a night. If BJ didn’t know any better, he’d think the nurses were just scheming to get Hawkeye alone in a room full of nurses and not have his wits about him. 

“It’s freezing in there.”

“It’s warm in here.”

“There are four of us.”

BJ nearly chuckled at the resignation in Hawkeye’s voice as he pulled off his blanket to stand. 

“I knew I should have gotten a bigger bed.”

“Could you people hold it down?” Frank piped up, his voice grating at BJ’s nerves. “I mean, show some consideration.”

“I don’t remember leaving a wake-up scream,” BJ grumbled. Consideration, his ass.

“Thanks, Hawkeye, you’re the only one who can fix it.” BJ was pretty sure that wasn’t true and given Hawkeye’s tired mutters of disdain, he felt safe in assuming the feeling was mutual.

“BJ?”

“Hmm?”

“If I’m not back in five minutes, don’t come get me.” If he wasn’t so tired, BJ might have chuckled. 

Out of the corner of his partially-opened eye, he watched the light above Hawkeye’s cot shut off and his roommate shuffle out of the tent behind two nurses who were bundled up as tightly as they could be to avoid what had to be a bitter chill outside. 

BJ stretched out a little as he turned onto his back to stare at the ceiling. Sleep was evading him all-too-rudely and likely would continue to until Hawkeye was back and snoring quietly. Ever since Peg and he had started sharing a bed all those years ago, BJ had begun to find it impossible to sleep without someone nearby. Frank was all the way across the tent and there was a stove between them; impossible to hear. He’d been worried coming over- there had been plenty of stories of what MASH units were like back home, but no details of the sleeping arrangements. He’d breathed an enormous sigh of relief when Hawkeye told him they’d be bunking together and an even larger one that evening when he realised his bunkmate snored loudly enough to drown out the distant sounds of gunfire. If he ever needed it, he just pretended the lanky man ten feet away was his beautiful wife, ten inches away. And if the homesickness was especially bad, he pretended Frank’s little fidgets during the night were Erin rustling in her crib. Sometimes it worked well enough to soothe him back to sleep. Other times, it left him in worse shape than he’d began. Korea had proven itself time and time again to be a lonely place, but knowing that he had people around him made it somewhat more bearable. 

Between the stove warming the air around his feet and the thoughts of his family swirling around his head, the sleep that had been struggling to overtake him was finally succeeding in pulling BJ’s eyes closed. Until an explosion close enough to shake him out of any sleep he could have gotten rang through the camp. That would have been plenty to set him upright and his heart racing, but it was the collective screaming that got BJ out of bed (thank God he’d had the sense to wear shoes to bed). He paused in his scrambling just long enough to throw on his bathrobe before bolting to the nurse’s quarters. Hawkeye was stumbling out of the tent as he arrived, palms pressed to his eyes and screaming, all the while surrounded by nurses who were screaming just as shrilly. As worrisome as it was, at least Hawkeye was still able to walk. Plenty of soldiers had come through their OR who never learned of such luxury. 

BJ reached him the same moment Colonel Potter did, but Potter, ever the leader, backed away from the forming posse to organise them. Flash burns were serious business and it was necessary to get Hawkeye to the OR as quickly as possible. BJ knew he heard Potter say something about an ophthalmologist, but it was hard to hear over Hawkeye’s screams of pain, the nurses’ screams of panic and the sound of his own heart pumping in his ears. 

The next few hours were a blur to say the least. The sleep deprivation was already messing with his head, but hearing Hawkeye in so much pain was what was really knocking BJ out of his rhythm. He’d never seen anyone in that much pain without there being a substantial amount of blood involved. As much as he hated it, BJ had grown comfortable with blood. It was easy to fix: if it was where it wasn’t supposed to be, he had to stop it from getting there. Sometimes that involved stitching, or removing parts that were too broken to be fixed, or just removing things that weren’t supposed to be there, but there was almost always blood. In this case, there was absolutely none. The closest thing to red was Hawkeye’s bathrobe and the toasted skin around his eyes. The worst part about the whole situation was that there was nothing he could do to help. He was no ophthalmologist- didn’t know anything about the inner workings of the eyes beyond what he learned in first year biology. 

BJ wasn’t sure how Radar accomplished it, but the ophthalmologist in question, Major Overman, arrived long before the sun was up and true to the reputation BJ had gathered of him, was swift in his examination and bandaging. It was awful, but the truth of the matter was that it was all there was to be done. Padding the eyes and wrapping a long length of bandage around the patient’s head so the padding wouldn’t move. It would let the eyes rest and after a week or so, if vision came back, everything would be okay. If not…

“How’s that feel?”

“Blind.”

BJ would have probably chuckled if the situation was different. The mood of the room seemed to express the same feelings. The Major didn’t even crack a smile.

“Okay, Hawkeye, you take it easy for a couple of days. I’ll be back Friday.” 

Nearly a week away. As nervous as he was, BJ could only imagine the terror Hawkeye was feeling. But he never showed it. Never showed it unless you knew him, that is. He always told jokes to keep the atmosphere lighter, but he laughed at them. There was no laughter here. Not even a smile. 

“Listen, one important question. Will I get to keep my nickname?”

“Let’s hope so.” The Major spoke for everyone there. They called him ‘Pierce’ often enough, That was different. Too impersonal. His name, but never his name.

“Just wondering if I should rent a seeing-eye dog or buy one.” The joking was getting weaker. Hawkeye was slowly accepting what had happened and it looked like everyone who had gathered around his cot could feel it too. 

“See you Friday.”

Major Overman packed his gear and was escorted out of the post-op by Potter, asking something about a General O'Reilly. If BJ hadn’t been so on-edge, he would have maybe even laughed at the idea of Radar being a General, let alone a General who was so mad that he scared a clerk into a rushed shipment of an ophthalmologist. But instead, he was leaning on the end posts of Hawkeye’s cot, watching a nurse yell her sympathies at him. There was something about the injured and sick that made people forget what their actual ailments were and caused them to be treated as invalids. Based on Hawkeye’s wince, it was clear his partner-in-crime was already feeling the sting of the different treatment. 

“You don’t have to shout, the sides still work.”

“We’re sorry,” she corrected herself, lowering her voice to a library-esque whisper.

“That’s alright. Next time, get a union man.”

“Hawk, if there’s anything you need…” It was generally said as a passing sympathy that didn’t really mean anything, but BJ wasn’t sure what else to say. He was a caretaker deep down and lord knew Hawkeye was going to need some help during the next few days.

“Well, if you’re going by the PX, you could get me a colouring book and some crayons.” Hawkeye’s head was angled towards him, but he wasn’t facing him by a long shot. Whether because it didn’t matter or because he didn’t care, BJ wasn’t sure. Nor was he sure he wanted to know the answer.

“I think you’re sick enough to qualify for the big box. I gotta go.” He was smiling, but BJ was sure Hawkeye could hear the worry in his voice. He tried to keep calm and carry on, no matter what the war threw, but this wasn’t something he could just walk away from. He wanted to be there.

“BJ?”

“Yeah?”

“Visit me a couple hundred times, will ya?” The request was small and quiet, almost desperate. 

“At least.”

[heartfeltheart]

Alchemy: Tiny Steps

Chapters: 12/45 Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist/Harry Potter Rating: T Relationships: Edward/Winry, Lan Fan/Ling, and May/Alphonse. Primary Characters: Edward Elric, Severus Snape Additional Tags: Crossover, Teacher!Edward, BrOtp Edward/Severus. Sassy beyond measure. Pro!Snape Series: Part 2 of 9. Summary: Part two of the Alchemy Series.  Politics. Either you love it, hate it or you live it. For Alchemy Teacher Edward Elric, he lives it, hates it and loves it when he gets the upper hand. Here is to another year of hell… D/C: I do not own Harry Potter or Fullmetal Alchemist. Discord: La Red(Mesh Mash of… stuff.): https://discord.gg/KYjmVAb Alchemy Series: https://discord.gg/DejEYNJ

"They… are… WHAT!"

Everyone sitting or standing around the table looked over to see Mr. Edward Elric yelling at his brother, holding onto his shoulder and shaking him relentlessly. A hawk had swooped into the meeting room earlier and dropped a very heavy package on top of Mr. Elric's head. The hawk then prompted to peck on the Golden blonde's head and flew off terrifying both Elric brothers. When opening the package, after making sure for any possible traps or so on, Mr. Elric slowly opened the package and pulled out a letter. Whatever contents that letter contained is the cause of the latest episode.

"They can't come! They'll ruin everything! General Armstrong will kill all of them and General Useless will make them hate us even more!"

'Why am I always at the end of brother's wrath?' Alphonse thought miserably as he attempted to remain conscious. "I... losing… consciousness…"

"Whhyyyyy!" Edward wailed out in dismay.

During this time while the Elric brother's episode, Mei reached over and swiped the letter away. Sitting back in her seat, the princess scanned the letter. The contents of the letter caused the blood from her face to drain and sway dangerously. This is bad. Very bad.

"Miss. Chang, what is wrong?" Amelia asked out, seeing how the Emperor's sister looked like she is about to pass out. Madam Bones nearly jumped out of her seat when Mei reached over and bonked Alphonse and Edward's head together with a piercing shriek. Mei then proceeded to yell at the brothers in Xingese, by the looks of it, no one needed to a spell to tell she is severely insulting them. "Er…"

"This is Major General Armstrong! This is not a time to panic! You two need to get a grip on reality!"

"Armstrong? I was panicking about Mustang and Hawkeye! She's coming too?... Noooooo…"

-.-

"If I'm going down there, I am not going there alone!"

"Mercy! MERCY!"

Major Miles and Captain Hawkeye watched as their respected superiors act in very childlike in the middle of a very busy train station. Normally this would warrant looks of disgust, bewilderment or anything else in between, however consider it involved Major Mustang and Major General Armstrong… It is better to allow them to do what the latter wants to do with the former. No questions asked. The scene before everyone is Armstrong is manhandling Mustang into a waiting train, the conductor is several feet away sweat dropping at the scene before him. It was time to leave but he didn't want to end up in the woman's path.

Mustang hung onto a bench as Armstrong is pulling him by his legs towards the train. The bench is screwed into the ground and it is dangerously close to be pulled from the ground. "You don't need me over there!"

Armstrong momentarily stopped and stared at Mustang as if he was, probably is, the biggest idiot of all time. Without an moment of hesitation, she reached down and grabbed Mustang by his collar and whispered something into his ear. Mustang eyes popped open in fear before his entire expression fell solemnly. "You are a horrible woman…"

"Get on the train."

"Yes, mam…"

"Mustang..."

"General, I meant General!"

-.-

Major General Armstrong and General Mustang, prime candidates for future Fuhrer of Amestris. Both of whom are coming to Magical Great Britain for what many believe is to help with the negotiations. Those that believe that reason, are certain it had to do with the many articles that are written about their home country. A good reason. However, every snide remarks that is thrown towards Amestris are held back at the reported actions of the ambassadors of Amestris and Xing respectively. One is acting out of sheer panic and the other one looks like he's been losing sleep.

Many had already met General Mustang from his last visit, meaning the actions of the Elric Brothers are not about him. Then it had to do with Major General Armstrong. Every time someone even mention the name, the brothers will shriek and run off out of sheer panic. Is this woman truly as she is described?

Those nonbelievers that have a strong belief that it is a complete show. There is no way this muggle woman is that terrifying enough for such actions. Oh poor, poor souls. Let us hope they do not cross the Northern Wall of Briggs. There are many good reasons to be extremely wary of the Major General, one of them has to do with the sparkles that have been passed down the Armstrong family for many generations.

-.-

"Madam Bones, have you met this… Major Armstrong?"

Bones looked up from her steaming hot cup of herbal tea, thanks to Amestris for providing the tea. She saw Umbridge sitting across of her with that ridiculous smile of hers. How she managed to get her position is beyond her. If one would dig a little deeper, they would see how much hypocrisy she exudes. "Major Armstrong? The man that came here several months ago? Of course, we all met him. Thank Merlin's beard he's not coming otherwise well end up here for months on end."

"I meant the one that is coming here?"

Bones's expression remained unchanged, inwardly she is becoming annoyed. The worse part is, she hasn't even finish her cup of tea. "That is Major General Armstrong. Yes, I have met the General once during my visit to Amestris."

"What is she like?"

"Commanding."

"And…?"

"Cold."

"What else?"

"Strong."

"Madam Bones… is there anything useful that could be said about this Armstrong woman?"

"..." Bones placed her cup of unfinished her tea in front of her on top of a matching plate. She then proceeded to lace her fingers together and placed them in front of her and gave Umbridge her temporary attention. "What I know about this woman is what was told to me by General Mustang and the Elric Brothers. The only thing useful you could possibly need to know about her is that her sword is more than just a statement."

-.-

"Welcome to the Leaky Cauldron!" Mustang laughed out uneasily as he leads Armstrong, Hawkeye and Miles into the English Pub. The moment they stepped into the establishment, everyone went quiet, all their attention went towards the muggles that just entered the Magical Pub. Sound resonated once more as the witches and wizards stared to whisper loudly about the Amestrian officers. Many could easily recognize General Roy Mustang and Captain Hawkeye from their previous visits to the establishment. The other two are unknowns but are wearing similar uniforms, the only difference is that they are wearing a heavy black coat with a thick fur collar.

"This place is repulsive." Armstrong deadpanned.

"To proceed forward or to retreat?" Miles mused aloud enough for his commanding officer to hear.

"As much I want to leave this…" Armstrong gave a group of wizards a deadly stare when they started to snicker and point at her. The group stopped their lewd whispers and quickly exited the Leaky Cauldron with their tails in-between their legs. "Place we have a mission to accomplish. Once that is done, we are leaving. I am not going to spend an unneeded moment of my time here dealing in this pathetic game of politics."

"Let's hope it stays political…"