#having to take intepretations of the end times seriously for 4 years
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13, trying to prevent yaz from spiralling when they get separated: i need you to do a deepdive into eschatology
#fghgjhjhggh#'yea i know this sucks babe but we'll figure it out the fate of the world is on your shoulders i believe in you kisses <3'#like thats where you'll end up right#'find out when the aliens come try and take over'#eschatology and death cults and conspiracy theories probably#forced to sift through like centuries of that stuff for years on end trying to find the Real in all of it#and you cant.......stop. bc the world will end#i dont think you come out of that.................normal#even with the best starting condition you dont come out of that normal but yaz is like#functional only by virtue of her circumstances i think#she looks fine bc shes standing next to 13#i dont think shes normal under the surface#i dont think 4 years of apocalypticism left her untouched#dan either i mean i dont think anyone comes out of that untouched but these two are like barely keeping it together beforehand#can you imagine how WEIRD theyve become#can you imagine how obliviously and kind of unsettlingly weird they'd be in support groups#the others would get it like sure none of us are really normal anymore but like#i think they'd be weird#4 years of having to depend on each other and not knowing if you'll get back home and having to take The End Times seriously nonstop as a#matter of urgency and duty#and then losing the third member of your party?#dan and yaz will be so weird and fucked up#iknow im repeating myself but im just trying to put myself in the frame of mind of#having to take intepretations of the end times seriously for 4 years#when youre already like a lowkey suicidal person to begin with#i think if yaz hangs out with 14 she'll say such weird and fucked up things entirely obliviously and he'd be like O.O#she probably still has 1900 habits that show up unexpectedly#or like just miscalibrated. has to take a trip to another country and takes a train bc she forgets planes exist#has to look up somethign and just goes SIGH. gets her coat to go to the library. and ryans like ??? ive googled it#and shes like oh fuck google
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MY REALLY OLD ART A LONG ASS POST
So this first piece I found in a folder on my computer called “Old art organize later” within a folder called “ REALLY OLD ART” I drew this in 2006 and the jpeg was titled:
“My most awesome dragon evur”
Also noted was my attempt at signing my name in Japanesef saldkfjsdlf because i was 11 and anime was THEE coolest thing to me.
Okay the rest is going under a read more because this is gonna be LONG
here are some gems from 2007
yes this is a kk slider gijinka faksdjfalsdjf
next up we have my attempt to make super paper mario characters into handsome anime men
it was a this point i was a young baby on deviant art longing to do “digital” art because thats what all the really cool artists did, i didnt have a tablet and the photoshop-esque thing i had was a pirated copy of JASC Paintshop 7 (or maybe it was 8), so what did I make with newly unlocked DIGITAL ART POWERS??
and this charming thing which was my intepretation of what the The Thing Behind the Wall in Johnny the Homicidal Maniac looked like:
but these were only the beginning of my long and arduous journey as an artist, 2009 came and I entered highschool 13 years old and with nothing but the power of deviant art and being an outcast with 2 friends on my side so here are some of my favorites from that era of Noo art:
^^^ this is in fact EXACTLY what i looked like at 13
its kind of funny bc looking back you can absolutely tell id been drawing dragons/wolves since i was like able to hold a pencil but didnt start drawing humanoid characters until i was 12 afjlakfjs
ANYWAYS CARRYING ON BC THERES PLENTY MORE!! For example my Invader Zim/Naruto OCs
yes one of those aliens was kisame
every day knowing that I get to claim ownership over this is truly exhilarating the girl with the pigtails was my OC that was definitely not just me. Her name was Delainbow, she was Sasuke’s daughter and she is truly the epitome of everything that was good about my childhood
WHAT A LEGEND
this is genuinely what I wanted to be when i was 13 god I love it
oh fuck i missed this one from 2008
god GOd i love these all so much I WAS SO FREE I JUST DREW WHATEVER AND DIDNT CARE
ok just gonna put a few more without comment but these are all 2009 again
Moving on to 2010-2012 era art
shout out to teenage me for still being not the worst at drawing animals
the freaking EDGE
so there was some point here where i started trying to stop drawing “anime” bc i was tired of ppl making fun of me so I figured if I didnt draw anime ppl would take me more seriously when in reality those ppl just sucked and so did my highschool art teacher
like... YUCK???? what the fuck was i was I even accomplishing here aksdjfaskjfkasldjf
my wolves still were still way cooler then the rest of my art lol
alright carrying onto late highschool early college, its summer of 2012 im on tumblr, im a homestuck, and ive gotten a laptop and tablet as a gift for getting into art school (yeah I drew like aformentioned above and still got into art school) sadly i dont have any scans of the stuff i drew for that portfolio, it was mostly still lifes i drew like a boot and a skull haha
okay so here are the gems i made upon finally getting a computer of my own, photoshop and bamboo wacom tablet,
here she is my first attempt to paint in photoshop....s fjaskdjfaskljfklasd
the rest of these are all from like my first fall/winter semester of college when i actually started getting a real art education and not just shitty no budget rural hometown highschool art class
So that picture of zachary which is honestly NOT thaaaaaat bad was one of the first things I ever posted to break 500 notes, i think a fewwww of my homestuck drawings had come close after like months of being on the site but like that zachary was one of the first times id genuinely been a little succesful with sharing my art online and im still very grateful to everyone who liked and reblogged it ^u^
After that well, i do have a lot more bad art but its not quite as funny as my pre-college stuff from that point on you mostly just see me struggling to improve anatomy and struggling to get through school (which ultimately took me 8 years to get through bc art school is terrible on your mental health and i had to do the last 4 years as a half time student)
but thats kind of a sad note to end on so heres just a few more gems i think you all should see if you’ve taken the time to read this haha
Thank you if you took the time to scroll through all of this i hope you had a laugh and that if you’re ever feeling down about your art to remember that we all start at the bottom and you can only go up from there no matter how long it takes you! Don’t give up and honestly just draw your truth <3
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