#having floors named “of the victims of wrath” and “of those who accept their past”

[iyliss]

btw i'm sorry to announce that i'm about halfway through stranger of paradise and. fuck this game is fun. yeah yeah it's not a masterpiece and is a little clunky but it's so so charming. And so full of relentless passion for dissidia and final fantasy, i was so worried it would be mean-spirited but no it's very sincere and dedicated to its love which is everything i need to enjoy it.

[beyondstupidityblog]

On March 13th 2021, two friends and I did what never could have imagined possible, I watched Freddy Got Fingered for the ninth time, and it will by no means be the last. I’m explaining this to you, dear reader, so you and I have an important understanding between us. You will be reading the ramblings of one whose brain has curdled like milk left out in the hot afternoon sun. Now that introductions are out of the way, let us begin.

Freddy Got Fingered is a 2001 Comedy starring and directed by Tom Green as the Non-Titular Gordon Brody; an aspiring animator who goes to California to realize his dream, only to be constantly crushed under the weight of his father’s expectations. Sounds tame at first, but what lies beneath the veneer of mediocrity is truly impressive. Completely bombed,  audiences hated it, and critics loathed it. Roger Ebert got angry, saying “it isn’t even below the bottom of the barrel” and “Green should be flipping burgers somewhere.”. “Tasteless”, ��appalling”, “offensive”, “gross”, and “poo poo,” are just some of the things people have had to say about this film. Animal genitalia can be seen on screen for much longer than anyone could have expected, Tom Green swinging a baby akin to a morning-star with its umbilical cord, said umbilical cord being stolen and taped onto his stomach, gratuitous caning of a nymphomaniac paraplegic, and the dissection of a deer carcass. It is an abrasive experience that leaves a terrible taste in the mouths of those who mention it. Nonetheless, I love this movie. 

You ever see a contemporary art exhibit that has a piece that just looks like garbage somebody left out but in actuality is a tongue-and-cheek allusion to the pitiful state of modern art? That garbage is Freddy Got Fingered, and that exhibit is Hollywood. At face value it just seems like a poorly done film by a comedian trying to use his name to get a few butts in the seats before his irrelevancy arrives, but when scrutinized as a commentary of comedy films do the pieces start to fall into place. Tropes like the Protagonist being an unremarkable honkey, gross-out designed to get some cheap quick chuckles, side-characters who occupy the space solely for comedic relief, a shoe-horned romantic side-plot, and an equally as shoehorned in happy ending are all present in a mocking fashion. So many of these Hollywood schlockfests that this movie is paying homage to abuse tropes in some vain attempt to trick the audience into thinking they’re having a good time, when in reality it just reminds viewers of films that they’ve already watched before and could be enjoying instead. All of the awkward and uncomfortable scenes of gross-out and romance are purposeful, because nothing is quite as awkward and uncomfortable than a film disengaging the audience with its own mediocrity. “This is what it’s like to endure this trash!” Drunkenly screams Freddy Got Fingered atop the tallest piece of furniture in the room, while also exposing its genitals to keep you from getting too comfortable around it. Unlike the films it is parodying, its obsession with making a fool out of audiences rips them away from the comfort of the cinema, making them genuinely ask if it is worth wasting their time watching a film called Freddy Got Fingered. Even the title is an intentional slight, as it seems to be completely untethered to the actual plotline and is instead a reference to a seemingly inconsequential scene. But then again, that is the point of it all. Tom Green is an artist, and on his canvas is a portrait of Hollywood with all of the ugly little imperfections that cause a movie like this to be created. But this is just the meta-narrative of Freddy Got Fingered, something that you could find all over the internet. Why do I resonate with it so much, and what about it makes it so exceptional that led to this unhealthy fascination?

    Every instance that I’ve rewatched Freddy Got Fingered has always brought about a new side to it, and in the process leaves me craving for more. Gord is an interesting take on the average leading man. He is on the surface bland and inoffensive, made so in order to allow the majority of the audience to immediately identify with him, said group being 20-something skater guys with unrealistic expectations of themselves. Made especially ironic when after the introduction of Gord as an adept skateboarding rebel escaping from authority, he starts to show that in reality he is an unlikeable, bratty, entitled, and all around unpleasant person. Barely a scene passes before we see him masturbate a horse while exclaiming he is a farmer to his father who is not present, seemingly a crude gag but is in reality an insight into his low self worth caused by his imposter syndrome stemming from distant paternal relationship. I would like to remind you, dear reader, that I am still writing of Freddy Got Fingered, in case you were beginning to think I have lost my mind (The answer is yes by the way). All throughout the film Gordon Brody puts on masks for different situations, never allowing himself to be who he is. When infiltrating the Animation studio where he wishes to pitch his cartoons, he pretends to be a mailman to get past reception and then impersonates a police officer when the former stops being effective. Donning the visage of a British Bobby, he dashes into the restaurant where the man he is searching for, Mr. Wallace, is eating. Showing him his cartoons, Wallace is impressed with the potential they have, but says that they are incoherent and lack real substance. Upon rejection, Gord puts a pistol in his mouth before Wallace stops him and advises what he should do to improve. Gord was genuinely ready to blow his brains out the back of his skull if he wasn’t able to get his show greenlit, and it hit me in that moment that he isn’t just some random jackass, but a victim of detrimentally low self-esteem.

The origins of his complex are made apparent when he goes back home to Oregon and are reintroduced to his Family. We see that his father Jim, played by Rip Torn, is disappointed in his return and begins to sneer at him for his failure. This father and son dynamic always has tension in every scene from this point onwards. Gord, who just wants to be accepted for who he is and not judged by what the world expects him to be, is always at the receiving end of Jim’s wrath, who values his idea of a successful life over the happiness of his sons. From here it becomes little wonder why Gord is the way he is, all his life he was told that who he was is not good enough, he has to be what his father wants if he is to be considered worthy of not only love, but being treated with a modicum of dignity. Whenever Gord acts eccentric or divulges his interests to his father, they are met with either resentment supplemented by verbal assault, or physical violence. After a late-night skateboard outing to escape from his father’s wrath goes awry, he visits his convalescing friend in the hospital, whereupon he meets one of the more interesting characters in relation to Gord, the love interest Betty.   

A horny wheelchair bound temptress may not seem like it upon first glance, but Betty is actually the most interesting character out of the entire cast. She feels genuine, introduced as a bored receptionist flipping a coffee creamer idly. Gord immediately strikes up a conversation, whereupon he and the audience find out she has an interest in physics, and apparently an interest in him as well. Betty is strangely well written for what most considered at the time to be a crass sexual joke, so much so that she would actually be a better protagonist than him. She is everything Gord is not, she’s smart, funny, ambitious, and  kind to a fault. Even her side plot to create a rocket powered wheelchair makes for a much more unique plot than the one given. Even Gord reciprocates this sentiment in their meeting, lying that he is a stockbroker in an attempt to impress her. In fact, sectioning her off as just the dull protagonist's love interest is a jab at how women in these movies are only there to serve in the development for the male protagonist, just nothing more than their muse. Nonetheless, without this relationship the movie would lose a lot of its soul. Romantic chemistry in comedy films is always hit or miss, but Gord and Betty do seem to have it surprisingly. They’re both silly and impulsive, creatively driven to a fault, but just different enough to eek out the best and worst in them. Gord  thinks that what he wants to do with his life is wasteful, but Betty doesn’t. Now I don’t mean that she directly affirms that he is worthwhile like most poorly written love interests would, stroking their lover’s(and by extension the director’s) ego, rather she confronts him with her optimism. He asks if she would feel stupid and like a loser if her experiment failed. Taken aback at first, she questions why she would, relaying that her failures are just as important as her successes. Gord’s self-worth is directly tied to his ability to succeed, whereas Betty doesn’t need this affirmation. Their dialogue further cements how detrimental his father’s overbearingness was to his outlook, and how he is slowly beginning to realize how destructive that mindset is. 

At their dinner date, Jim sees Gord and Betty across the restaurant, then reveals that Gord was lying to both him and her about his office job while poking fun at her disability, leading to a father-son scuffle that throws the entire floor into utter chaos. Cops show up, Gord and Jim are detained, and Betty bails Gord out. Most mediocre comedies at this point would have the love interest be upset that her significant other lied to her, leading to him having to make things right to repair their relationship before the happy ending. Breaking the mold, Betty does not get angry with Gord even a smidgen, choosing to be understanding of his situation now that she caught a glimpse into his home-life. She just plain likes Gord, willing to put up with him more than she really should, but still chooses to look past his lies and self-destructive nature for who he truly is, someone who just wants to be accepted by the world around him. Someone just like her.

Right after that enaction of social terrorism performed by the Brody father and son duo, they decide it would be best to go to family therapy and assail the audience with what I fondly refer to it as, “The Scene.��� “The Scene” is Freddy Got Fingered’s statement to the world, it is what instills a man with the impetus to rewatch a glorified stoner daydream for the ninth time and leave him wanting more! Gord accuses his father, in a final act of defiance, of molesting his younger brother Freddy. During the ensuing confusion Gord picks up a bust of Sigmund Freud and throws it into the glass window pane, allowing him to escape into the evening sun. The authorities take Freddy away and send him to The Home for Molested Children, and the family slowly unravels from then on. Besides the heavy handed metaphor of Freud’s theories being used as a way for Gord to escape his predicament while simultaneously discrediting them, “The Scene” also recontextualizes Freddy, innocuous of a character as he is, as Gord’s foil. He is in the movie very little but when he is it is to serve one of two purposes: To be compared to Gord, or to be treated as an object. During breakfast much earlier in the film after a fight between Gord and Jim, Freddy tries to explain to his brother that he should grow up. Gord, surprisingly, talks down to him and halts the conversation.

Gord: “He's driving me insane.”

Freddy: “No. No, you're driving him insane. You're older than me and you still live at home. I have a job, you know. I pay my own way.”

Gord: “You work in a bank. Should I be dazzled?”

Freddy: “Well, at least I don't live at home!”

Gord: “No, you live in a tiny shithole and you come here to eat for free.”

With these lines it is plain to see that despite Freddy’s idea of success directly lining up with his father’s, he is even more pitiful than Gord. What little we know of him is to show that his acquiescence to his father’s expectations has left him bereft of not only genuine personal success, but of dignity itself. When child protective services come to take him away, he is half naked, mouth agape, watching open heart surgery on television, a palpable indication of emptiness. He isn’t treated as an adult either, as his protests to the police fall on deaf ears as both them and the psychologist infantilize him. Why would Tom Green name this movie after a character like Freddy, whose lack of presence and characterization make him little more than an afterthought when looking back on the story? Or did I just answer my own question? Freddy is not a character because he is not allowed to be one, he is just too passive and accepting of his circumstances for him to stand out. All he can be is a doll that Jim uses to dress up as the perfect son, and this passiveness leads to Gord, the “failure,” to both pity and resent what he let himself become. That’s why Gord accuses their father of molesting him, after all he does narratively violate Freddy’s autonomy by consistently making decisions for him. Evidently enough, as soon as Gord dons a suit for a quick bit Jim is elated because he believes that his son finally gave in to his demands for him to get a job, because he is acting more like his obedient brother. In this sense Freddy is the most tragic member of the Brody clan, a literal manchild whose growth was stunted by overbearing guardians. When I think of him, a bonsai tree comes to mind. Sure, it looks healthy, but when you realize that it could have grown into a much bigger plant if it were not for its small pot, that realization of wasted potential comes with a tinge of melancholy.

I want to end this essay with a moral that I took away from Freddy Got Fingered, as strange enough as that sounds, and what it has to say about art as a whole. Put simply, this is a story about revenge. Despite and because of his Father’s harsh ways, Gord managed to take from the trauma he sustained throughout his life and sublimated it into his animation. Creation not only lets him heal, but also acts as retaliation against Jim once he becomes successful. So long as you have the drive to prove everyone’s doubts and admonishments wrong by persevering out of wicked spite, you will have the last laugh. Freddy Got Fingered is a story about revenge through artistic expression, and I think that is quite beautiful.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 230: League of Thots

Previously on BnHA: We learned all about Twice’s past, which was a lot like Oliver Twist, if you’re like me and you never actually read Oliver Twist and only have extremely vague memories of watching one of the movie versions as a kid and seeing some poor wretched child asking for more oatmeal and falling in with some lovable scalawags. Although I’m pretty sure Oliver Twist never hit a dude with a motorcycle and made a bunch of clones of himself because he was lonely and then the clones all tried to kill each other. But like, other than that, I still kinda got that vibe, idk. Anyway so Twice is great and we all love him and feel sorry for him, and the Metahuman Liberation Army ripped his mask off because they’re dicks, and then they broke his arms because see re: the part where they’re dicks. But once his arms were broken, Twice, who’d been having an ongoing identity crisis due to not being sure whether he was one of his own clones, realized he couldn’t be a clone since he was still alive and hadn’t melted into a big blob after taking all that damage. So then he got all empowered, and he made like a dozen fresh new clones of himself, and now they’re gonna fuck up the MLA’s shit hopefully, and good riddance.

Today on BnHA: The League of Twices surges forth to do battle with the forces of evil and it’s my favorite thing ever. What started out as a dozen quickly multiplies exponentially -- we’re talking literal exponential growth here -- until Re-Destro’s Army of 116,000 people actually find themselves outnumbered. Up in his tower, Re-Destro is all “gee Skeptic you sure did fuck up spectacularly :)” and Skeptic quickly makes himself scarce, leaving Giran all on his own to antagonize RD about how royally screwed he is. Back in the thick of things, Dabi continues to attack The Night King, but it turns out he’s able to create new ice from just about any water source, so that complicates things a bit. Meanwhile Dabi is apparently starting to roast himself with his own quirk, which is very interesting and a huge clue as to how he came to be where he is, all scarred up and presumably Presumed Dead, and it’s all very intriguing. But before we can ponder that much, we cut to Ujiko, who’s getting tired of watching the League kick ass so effortlessly and decides to throw a Gigantomachia-shaped wrench into the mix just for the hell of it, waking the big guy early so he can join in on the fun. Well you won’t see me complaining omg.

(All comments are my unspoiled reactions from my initial readthrough of the chapter. I did a quick edit for grammar and clarity immediately afterward, and added a couple of ETAs in the process, but aside from that there are no changes.)

oh my god

first of all, y’all know I love it when Horikoshi really gets into the nitty-gritty of how someone’s quirk works and hammers out all the little stipulations and provisions about what they can and can’t do, etc. but then to do it with this adorable little chibi Twice sketch is almost too much. we’re only on the first panel here; if this is an indicator of what the rest of the chapter is gonna be like, fair warning that I will probably have a number of little fangirling breakdowns

anyhoo, so this definitely clears some things up. the translation could be a little clearer, but I’m gonna take this to mean that he has a two-clone limit, period, and can’t make more than two of any person or object until the existing clones disappear. meaning that this can’t actually be used to create entire armies, which is a smart move on Horikoshi’s part in terms of keeping him from getting too op. this is especially important because we know his clones can use the same quirks as the original. so yeah, that could potentially get out of hand real fast without a few limiters in place

but! there is one exception to the “only two” rule, which we’re now seeing in action! a quirk hack, if you will. which is that if he clones himself, each of those clones is then capable of using the same Doubling quirk under the same rules. so each clone can make an additional two clones. which is dope. like, past a certain point, you actually have to start using math to keep up with him. and that part is in fact pretty motherflippin’ powerful, even if each duplicate is weaker than the last. it’s definitely not something you want to fuck with. I would sure hate to be a person, or army of people, who have done just that and are now going to have to feel his wrath. oh man

so because this is a Flashback Arc we are now cutting to another flashback, but this time a more recent one involving the Shigaraki Squad all hanging out in the ol’ Villain Shack

-- holy shit

okay but this is so fucking smart, though. these guys keep thinking of things that would never, ever occur to me because try as I might, I just can’t get on the same level of thinking outside the box that they’re at. obviously they’re a good deal more primed to think of creative applications of their own quirks, having lived with said quirks for most of their lives. but still

anyways, look at me, I’m practically beside myself being impressed even though Twice wasn’t actually able to do anything lol. but just, even the fact that they tried is impressive to me. leave no avenue unexplored. god this manga is so good

anyway so now we’re cutting back to the present, and Twice is thinking that he wants to repay his friends for accepting him. “that’s all I ever think about!”

weekly reminder that Twice is in fact the nicest guy in the series. and it’s all the more impressive since he lacked any kind of good influence when he was growing up. dude is a fucking saint if you think of it like that

lol. well no one ever said saints couldn’t be violent sometimes

so now the MLA goons who were formerly watching on the sidelines are all “oh shit” and they’re rushing in to try to help contain the situation

only to be confronted with this

you see?? math. Twice to the nth power. holy shit

also the title/attack name Sad Man’s Parade is so good and evocative that I assumed it must be a reference to something, but when I googled it just now all I got was links to articles and reviews of this very chapter. but I still think it must be a reference though. we’ve had a lot of them recently, including last week’s title, which as @herongale pointed out to me was a reference to The Killing Joke. so if any smart person can figure this one out, please let me know. it sounds like a song or something maybe

anyway I just clicked to the next page and it’s the most badass thing I’ve ever seen so let me just share that with y’all

things I like:

Twice’s face

that last panel. just. that

Twice holding Toga all protectively fffsdfasd

and did I mention that face though. holy hecking fuck my lovable lil LoV mascot is suddenly all grown up and making me feel things. going after all of my weak spots at once! protecting his friends: check. all scuffed up and covered in blood all sexy-like: double check. and last but not least, that look of utter, fearless determination: checkcheckmotherfuckincheck

jesus christ. first Giran and now you. more like League of Thirst, fml. what was that he was saying in the previous chapter about his scary looks?? you know what Twice, you can fuck right off with that noise. I can’t believe you were holding out on us this entire time

anyway so now here’s Re-Destro to chill me out before I completely lose my shit

ah, nothing like that arrogant pointy mug to bring me back down to reality right quick. really can’t wait until someone knocks this guy down off his high horse

and now he’s turning and casually remarking to Skeptic that it’s rare to see him fail. and holy shit though, there’s something about this scene that just sent a chill down my spine

and why did I get flashbacks to that poor lil dead mouse guy just now, though. the thing about Re-Destro is he’s the kind of guy who can and will be all smiles right up to and including the point where he happily snaps your neck for having displeased him. and that is scary as fuck. just look how quickly Skeptic noped the fuck out of there

look at him omg

he sure got the message right away, didn’t he? better go fix things right the fuck now if you enjoy being alive, dude

holy shit. he is genuinely scary. that one panel there may actually be scarier than anything AFO ever did. I suddenly had a rush of appreciation for Overhaul of all people, yes you heard me right, because at least he was just unabashedly Straight Up Evil. none of this pretending to be all nice with this cold dead look in your eyes bullshit

just, I really don’t like how it just seems like he could snap at any time and you’re never quite sure what the final trigger might actually be. it’s terrifying. but I guess that’s the kind of vibe you’ve got to have if you’re looking to be a villain so bad that the actual villains are fighting against you lol

now Giran is straight up not giving a fuck again, and acting like he’s not tied to a chair with one remaining hand and trapped in a room with this profoundly unsettling man, and as usual I love it

you just keep on being insolent and sarcastic you sexy piece of shit. you’re doing great

lol now Re-Destro says they’ll overcome quantity with quality, and wow. that may just be the most delusional thing this asshole has said thus far. have we even been reading the same arc?? are you really trying to say that your Metahuman Army of Jackasses is in any way even in the same league as Tomura’s merry band of ragtag prodigies? just go ahead and admit that they’re wiping the floor with you

and as if to prove my point

tbh I’m genuinely starting to feel like any one member of the League could singlehandedly take out Re-Destro’s entire force. and they haven’t even introduced you to Gigantomachia yet!! my god. RD’s horribly discomforting general vibe aside, this arc is like watching a horror movie play out where none of the victims realizes how screwed they are until it’s too late. and also you’re rooting for the killers because they’re likable and sexy

I do have to hand it to Parka here though because he’s somehow not dead yet in spite of all that, which is legitimately impressive

Dabi even says that his ice is almost gone. you’re living on borrowed time Baskin Robbins

ooh now we’re getting a quick panel of Compress doing his thing while Dabi carries on

Compress are we getting your flashbacks next. I can only begin to imagine what kind of tragic and relatable things you’ve been through and how hot you probably are too underneath that mask. how long until you’re my new favorite character. I’m onto this arc and its games by this point, Horikoshi. you and your motherfucking League of Thots ffff

Dabi is all “why do I have to help you?” lol. classic Dabi

eh what’s this

before I click to the next page, I’m just going to assume he’s talking about the twelve million Twices headed their way

yep

new favorite panel alert

oh my god. this is amazing. more of him to love

LMAO

FUCK YOU AND YOUR CAREFREE SELF-AWARE MANGA HORIKOSHI KOUHEI. I CAN’T LEGALLY MARRY A SHOUNEN MANGA SERIES SO WHY ARE YOU TORTURING ME LIKE THIS

and Compress is all “wow that sounds like something from a hero story,” and then we’re cutting to another Twice panel so that we can’t see him turning and winking at the audience

Twice says that the League are his only friends in the world and that they’re all precious to him. actually, he didn’t say it so much as he straight up yelled it. nicest guy in the fucking world I’m telling you. what a good egg. what a chaotic good little boy scout

lmao now he’s drunk on power and ambition

lmao go for it. THE WORLD IS YOUR OYSTER

(ETA: also I just realized what I said before about him not being able to make an army is clearly blatantly untrue, since even though he has the two-clone limit, that hardly matters if there are like 17,000 of him and each of them can clone two other people. he truly is a beast.)

oh my god

are you telling me that you guys are kicking so much ass that it’s actually backfiring on you. “that was such a good plan that we had, but unfortunately we didn’t take into account that we’re straight up gangstas who kick ass and take names”

hell, if the Army’s all gone by the time G-Man gets here, you can just sic all the clones on him and see if it finally gets you somewhere! I’m past the point of putting anything past you guys now. I’m pretty sure you can do anything. I’m glad you’re on our side. oh shit wait

anyway so Compress is checking his dandy pocket watch and says Giganto should be there in one hour and five minutes

are they taking travel time into account?? or wait, I guess Ujiko can just warp him over to their location once he finally wakes up. right

Twice is telling them all that Toga’s in trouble and needs help! yessss help her. I got so caught up in your tremendous badassery that I almost forgot

HEY WHAT THE

RUDE. WHO DID THIS

oh go figure

you know it really is incredible how quickly Horikoshi can get me back on that “so are we going to get any Dabi flashbacks” train though lol. I really should know better by this point. quash those hopes. this manga is not a charity; we don’t give out flashbacks for free just like that

and yet. my brain says no but my heart says “pleasepleaseplease”

so now Ben & Jerry’s is saying that he can also control the temperature of the ice. um, what? it’s already ice; how much colder can it possibly get? unless you’re talking about making it warmer, in which case I hate to break it to you but then it’s water and not ice, and you obviously can’t control water so

oh wait he just means that he can use his ice to freeze other stuff and make More Ice. oh

RIGHT, DABI??

and now Klondike here is launching into some kind of speech, oh joy

hoohhhhh boy

[sidles up to Dabi] hey there boy. that last part sound like anything you’ve heard before? jog any memories for you there bud? provoke any thoughts? spark any reveries??

Dabi you’re really one hell of a closed book, you know that? fuck my life

(ETA: but also! so the real colors of the MLA finally come out, huh. for all their talk of freeing people from oppression, they’re no different from the people they want to overthrow; it’s just that they want to oppress the people who don’t have quirks, or whose quirks are “weak.” no doubt the original Destro had a similar philosophy. can’t imagine quirkless people making out too well in this brave new world of theirs. in fact I wouldn’t be surprised if there was eventually a mass genocide of anyone quirkless. it would get real dark real fast.)

oh shit

everybody sHUT UP, WE’RE GETTING DETAILS ABOUT DABI’S QUIRK AND ABOUT HIS SCARS AHSLDFJASLK

okay first of all, !!!@KLK!L!!!LK!”!!!GGKK

and second, Horikoshi continues the trend of putting the brakes on the League’s powers getting out of control, even as he shows how much they can still kick ass when unleashed to their fullest potential. that’s a hell of a balance to strike

and third, !LJ!L!!!!”!”“!DSFLSDIW for reals though because this is the first we’ve ever gotten as far as actual details regarding those scars and their possible origins, and holy shit but I can’t. finally some more info on the mysterious house elf

and meanwhile Compress is sitting in a mess of melted and frozen Twices, and thinking that it would be great if they could have Haagen-Dazs face off against Gigantomachia. but like, the way he says that kind of implies that he doesn’t think he’s gonna last that long lol. which I’m in agreement with. Dabi you can go ahead and take this popsicle fucker out now

-- !!?!!

okay Horikoshi you can’t just CUT TO UJIKO LIKE THAT WITHOUT WARNING you ass. give me a sec to brace myself first would ya

and poor little John standing there in the corner. John-kun ;_; god that’s so fucked up to just draw him chilling there all but forgotten until he’s actually needed

and what do you mean “if you were to die here.” underestimating them much? but if you want to toss them a bone though sure go ahead

so does this mean he’s going to unleash another High End?? because I’m all out of puns for those, so I’ll have to come up with a new shtick and I can’t just do that off the cuff you know

oh, nope. even better!

yooooooo things about to get lit up in the club omgggggggg

YESSSSSSS

okay first of all is he literally uprooting fucking trees just by waking up from his nap slkjdlfffff how many more ways can Horikoshi come up with to show us how much of a fucking beast this guy is. holy fuck

and second, YESSSSSSSSS. THAT’S RIGHT YOU ARMY MOTHERFUCKERS! PREPARE TO TASTE SOME PAIN. JUST LOOK AT THAT. HE’S GONNA STIR UP SOME CALAMITIES AND SHIT. ALL YOU FUCKERS GONNA DIE, AND I’LL BE RIGHT HERE, WATCHING CONTENTEDLY AND CAPSLOCKING ABOUT IT

hahaha this arc is making me want to be a villain. I can’t help it. they make it look like so much fun. shit

[southboundhqarchive]

MEET AUTUMN,

FULL NAME › Autumn Caeden Lockhart AGE › thirty two GENDER › Cis woman (She/Her/Hers) FROM › Los Angeles, California RESIDENCE › Midtown neighborhood OCCUPATION › employee of the Dominelli Funeral Home, author NOW PLAYING › Him by Lily Allen

BIOGRAPHY,

trigger warnings: child abuse, brief mention of infidelity, death

Autumn never knew her biological mother or father, and her mother was actually correct: she didn’t miss them – nothing felt missing. Her mother’s presence was so grand, it took the place of a father and of two biological parents… then again, the live-in maid and nanny helped fill said roles. Alas, as her mother had always said, nobody had wanted her quite like she had.

“I jumped through hoops for you, Autumn! Do you know what they always told me? They told me I couldn’t handle a child just because I was single and always busy – can you believe that? I told them I would give you the best life with the best luxuries. ‘I am Irene Caeden,’ I’d remind them, ‘I am the last one of the greats.’ If it weren’t for your uncle Nel… Next time you refuse to listen to me, give me the respect I deserve, your punishment will be much worse than just helping Gladys scrub the floor! – Oh, by the way, you missed a spot.”

Since she was old enough to understand exactly what ‘publicity stunts’ were, Autumn had always had a sneaking suspicion that she had been nothing more to Irene. Irene always said the kind of mothering she practiced was the kind that her own mother never had – a mixture of love and discipline. “You’re lucky I love you,” she would tell Autumn. – And, you know, there were times Autumn believed that, maybe, just maybe, Irene – ‘Momma Hen’ – did love her. She always had the best birthdays and Momma Hen was always so kind to her during them! Of course, there were always paparazzi there… and, of course, afterwards, Irene would request she only pick out her favorite toy a let her donate the rest… but that was for a good cause!

That being said, there were also the times that it felt she was the one doing things wrong – that Momma Hen was in the right. Every once in a while, Autumn would play a game she simply called ‘Momma Hen’ when Irene was out. During this game, she would impersonate Irene. She never meant it as malice – she would simply give a fake acceptance speech to her dolls or wear one of her mother’s strings of pearl. Perhaps she’d repeat some dialogue her mother had in one of her movies, then let her dolls play the opposite roles. She admired Irene, truly, so when she was scolded for acting like her, she couldn’t help but believe Irene was in the right.

Oh! But then there were the friendly competitions they had. Be they seeing who could get to the other side of the pool faster, racing down the driveway and back, or even something as… not physical as chess. Oh, Irene was always so jovial during these! That is, up until Autumn would put up a protest. Her legs (and arms) were tired – she simply couldn’t swim or run anymore! They had been at the chessboard for six hours – she hadn’t won a single game and knew she wouldn’t be able to on that particular night!

Now, if the complaint was something such as her limbs being tired, Irene would be sure to remind her that the world will make her tired. She would be sure to remind her that she was the only person who knew and understood this. She would be sure to remind her that this is discipline. She would be sure to repeat, just one more time, that, the second Autumn beat her, they could go. Alas, if Autumn put up a protest – as she often did – being locked away for some many hours until Irene told the nanny to let her out wasn’t out of the question. If the complaint was related to a game of strategy, Irene would do the exact same – the only difference would be the punishment. Autumn would be made to sit there, eyes open, all night and all day, looking at the board until she found a move. She was not allowed sleep. She couldn’t sneak it, either. One of the indoor security cameras in the house would directly face that spot, and all hell would break loose if Autumn didn’t stay in that chair, not sleeping, until she found a way to win.

And it simply continued with things such as that. Autumn could never tell whether Momma Hen really loved her or not. For as many times as she said she did, her actions spoke differently. The best nights of Irene’s life – nights in which she’d win an award she’d been simply ill for – could turn into her most terrifying nights. She would overreact to what Autumn believed were the most trivial things. She found one single wrinkle in one of her daughter’s shirts or dresses and she would take whatever it’d been on or in and let all hell break loose. Sometimes, during these fits, she would eventually show a vulnerability Autumn was not used to. Hell could bring out her mother’s greatest fears, the biggest causes of her paranoia. There was a stain on the floor – she’d told Autumn to clean! – only, there wasn’t actually a stain. It was perfect. But they cleaned it together, anyway.

They were only ever truly connected when they were both horrified.

She was not the only victim of her mother’s rage, however. Sure, there may have been times she went two days without food because she refused to eat something her mother had made, but the garden was the biggest victim of Irene’s wrath. When she received bad news, the garden was the first place she went – cutting the roses, bringing axes to trees – it was all very cathartic. Autumn was tasked with picking up the fallen branches and stems. And Autumn thanked god that she wasn’t the garden.

When Autumn graduated high school, she got married to a kid who went by the name Mark. Irene didn’t like Charlie… even though it was the 2000s, she still considered him ‘too hippie’ – too much of a free-thinker and idealist. “We can’t afford idealists in our world.” At first, it seemed a silent antagonism, but she wound up tasking a young girl to seduce Mark. A weak-willed twenty year-old, Charlie fell prey to the new woman’s woos. Irene then told Autumn that – yes, she told her, and if he would cheat once, he’d do it again. Practically within the same sentence, she proclaimed that she had been dropped by her agency. She had always said that her loss of MGM in 1975 had truly caused a hit to the film industry. Sure, maybe they were a borderline abusive agency, but their films were damn good and rarely failed to be box office hits! She could be given the worst script and no one would even notice – that’s how great she was, and that was all thanks to MGM’s previous trust in her… After that, she had always talked about how flimsy her new studio was, but she had never believed it’d be so flimsy it’d drop her!

…but she was lying. She’d manipulated Mark and Autumn in order to drive Autumn back to her house. Her live-in maid had quit – manpower was short, and she also “missed her!” (Oh, she was a damn good actress! She had Autumn for a fool…) She still had her contract. She was still buying excessively. She was still drinking to excess.

Some years passed and, as Autumn grew older, their battles grew even. There was a certain sadistic pleasure Autumn took as she watched her mother fall ill… but, at the same time, they were both scared then. For as much as she wanted to revel in her mother’s decline, their shared fear made it so very difficult.

When she finally did let go of the life she’d been so stubbornly clinging to, groups and groups of people showed up to her funeral, but only so many of them were actually there for her – the one thing that Autumn knew always hurt her mother was being used for her fame. She knew Irene had believed no one loved her for her… and perhaps Autumn could have if Momma Hen had simply repaid the favor.

The will left Autumn out entirely – what she inherited: “You know what you’ve inherited, dear. – Momma Hen.” Oh, but Autumn refused to let her mother win. Before she abandoned her life in Hollywood, she wrote one book – one book that would become a best-seller, the most graphic biography – a tell-all about life with Irene Caeden. She had the last word now. Up until she died, she definitively had the last word.

Following the popularity of the book, she left the city to escape constant harassment and stopped off in Boot Hill, Arizona. There were so few people there, she could be a new person.

This new person reverted the second she began working at the funeral home, subjected to images of her past, present, and future… but she didn’t mind… This new person reverted the second she married the local pastor at the age of 23. This new person most certainly reverted when she had three children. Truly, she didn’t know why she kept allowing it. Being the strict parent in the relationship both terrified her and… came naturally. Every single day, she simply hoped she would never be like Irene. Although she and Gabe certainly had their differences, what to the point that it was a curiosity – why they were still married, she knew he, if nothing else, was a safety net. And she loved those kids.

❝ nobody gets through life on a pass. ❞

CENSUS,

FACECLAIM › Zoe Kravitz AUTHOR › Lucky

[jstmymagination]

After he dropped Marissa back off to A Safe Place he met up with Tohr at Havers clinic. Tohr wanted to speak with him to possibly get more details about the condition of the patient and the attack. Hello, May I help you gentlemen, said Havers head nurse Julie. Tohr respsond yes, we would like to speak to MD if he is in. He is scheduled to be back in about 5 mins if you guys have time to stick around and wait. They both obliged. Havers finished his transfusion bandaged his arm and rolled his long sleeved shirt back down. On top of that he put on his lab coat check himself in the mirror and headed back upstairs to resume the rest of his day. When he came around the corner he was greeted by 2 of the kings men. One of them being his brother in law Butch. Hello Gentlemen what May I assist you with evening? We would like to speak with regarding the attacked patients Ahh yes, we can step into my office. A few steps up the hallway and they were inside Havers office. The space itself was very cold the walls were covered with degrees from Harvard School of Medicine on his desk sat an MacBook to left of that 2 iPads a phone equipped with intercom and a to the right two 4 x 6 picture frames turned face down. Yes Gentlemen take a seat... I’m sorry if the information I provided to my sister wasn’t quite detailed enough however that’s I all I have to go on. Did anyone of the victims mention where they were or what they were doing when the attack happened. Unfortunately not, by the time they make it to me they are so badly beaten and drained, that the memory is scattered. Well if you hear anything please let us know. Butch started clearing his throat.. how would you like to join us for dinner sometime doc. We are family are we not? I’m willing to leave the past in the past if you are? For my shellens sake I’m asking for you for a family dinner just the three of us, whaddaya say? Havers was completely shocked by the gesture but did accept his brother in law invitation to dinner. He could tell that the warrior was grateful for his acceptance by the look on his face. Yes , I would be honored to have dinner with you and my dear sister. How about this coming Friday night? Friday it is. When they got back in the ESV Tohr looked over at Butch who was looking straight ahead and asked.. what was that about? Butch said would you believe me if I said I have not a fucking clue.. Something Marissa said today at lunch got to me.

How did you get through so many volumes? This stuff so boring. It’s not so bad once you learn my system. The first hundred or so pages are always going to the story of the warriors parents & their lineage. So that’s a blah, blah, blah... bore, bore, bore The next hundred pages always focus on the rearing, training and everything taught prior to them going through the change. I.E. more blah, blah, blah. This is why we want to start each volume on or around page 300. That’s where all the good stuff or need to know information starts. Great let’s skip to page 300 then. Not quite yet ..each of these journals are 500 pages long. You still don’t want to read those 200 pages, trust me. So then the next step is read pages 300 to 350 then skip to page 400 read to the end. I promise you my system works. You will learn everything you NEED to know about each warrior without being bogged down in the minutia. And if you have any questions I will be here to fill in the blanks. Shall we get started then.. Five hours later Lassiter pulled his head out of one of the journals and to see Pea looking stressed and uncomfortable. Are you okay? Yea just a little tired today has been long for me? Can we call it night? Sure you can go ahead up and I will pick up with you tomorrow. Pea went down the hall to room that had been assigned to her. Once inside she locked the door and went straight into bathroom to run warm water in that ginormous bathtub. Her joints were stinging and the make matters worst her stomach was growling. The smoothie only calmed it down for a little while how on earth was she supposed to make it another 20 days. After Pea added some lavender bubble bath she eased down into the water and said a silent prayer for relief. While she sat there she thought about all the people that lived in the house and how they greeted her with open arms.. particularly the queen. Wrath had not only settled down but made an aire to the throne. My how times have changed anyway I can’t afford to take any chances at this time, I have to stay on course. With that thought she closed her eyes and tired to relax.

Ahh yes we will have stuffed chicken, creamed spinach, garlic mashed potatoes for the entree and please make sure we have plenty of alkaline water. Also his favorite dessert is yellow cake with chocolate icing I would have a fresh one made as well. And then a bottle of scotch for my hellren. I think that should do it.. we will be using the private diningroom at A Safe Place it’s a little intimate setting so May I ask that you freshen up the linens on the table. Yes madam Fritz replied. Marissa had asked Fritz to assist her with her brothers' dinner because she wanted everything to be perfect and let’s face it perfection was Fritz's middle name. Even though the night was upon them she still couldn’t believe that her brother had agreed to have dinner with her and her hellren. Havers arrived promptly at 6:30 carrying a little box of treats no doubt they were macaroons. He knew that they were his sisters favorite. Marissa let fritz answer the door because her nerves were in ball. When Fritz escorted Havers through the door Marissa kept a poker face but she was mortified at how thin and frail he looked. Havers had never really been a big guy but he always carried a good amount weight on him... being 6ft 1 his body was well toned and full of definition. The person that stood in front of her now.. looked nothing like that. Greetings Brother mine, thank you for joining us for dinner. I am glad your hellren extended me the invitation When Marissa reached for her brothers embrace she tried to hold back the tears in her eyes. I’ve missed you, Havers And I have missed you my dear Marissa, here these are for you Come let’s sit down. Havers had to take a step back and he realized that Marissa hellren was dressed in a suit. The guy cleaned up very well. Man that lab coat adds 20lbs to him butch thought This guy is small, hell he looks like he could use a trip to the doctor. As Marissa and Havers reacquainted themselves with each other, Fritz began serving the meal.

Hi are you guys doing yoga today? Pea asked Bella, Mary, & Beth when she came downstairs. I would like to participate if y’all have room from one more body. Since it was going on her second week there Pea body had began to ache all over. Her senses were super heighten and she could feel herself becoming more aggressive. She knew exactly what or should I say who was responsible for triggering all of this. She could smell him through the walls even though they were separated by two floors, she could feel every moved he made. Those dark spices when he emerged from his room in the morning that poured all over him and Beth. The scent spoke to her like a mating call and her body was starting to respond. She could feel him as he approached the steps, hell at last meal she could smell his breath as if she were right in his face about to kiss him. This house is too small she thought, when he open his mouth to talk she immediately began to moisten in between her thighs, her pulse increased, she began panting for breath and her nipples instantly harden to the point that they were poked through her shirt. Her body was totally aroused and she couldn’t control it. Pea knew that she couldn’t let that happen again so instead of sitting down to any meal with the family she either made up excuses, or she would time it so that she’d be outside the house walking or on a pretend phone call. Tonight yoga would be the perfect distraction. Staying busy and pushing through the pain was name of the game. This would all be over in another week. Then she could go back to regular unbothered life. I missed you at last meal are you okay. Oh yes, I just had another meeting I have to stay ahead Of the curve. Fashion and time stop for no one..

Lassiter was so thankful for Pea her tips truly saved him from months and quite possibly years of reading. He notice that she had made herself right at home, like everyone else does that enters this house. When he went looking for her yesterday to get started, he saw that she was having tea with Mary, Jane & Manny. They appeared to be caught up in a debate over the show Fixer Upper with Chip and Joanna Gaines. Who’s the boss and who has the brains?! Pea & Manny were team Joanna for both Boss and Brains while Mary and Jane were team Chip. The show never really appealed to Lassiter much. He slowly backed into the study and started without her. Lassiter was trying to think of the best way to repay her. He couldn’t just let her go back to the city and never touch base again. That just wouldn’t do... maybe he could get Fritz to organize a going away brunch.. since Pea always drinking a beet smoothie, or beet juice. Come to think of it.. he rarely saw her with anything else. Hey Lassiter, I’m going to participate in the yoga class with Bella and the ladies, do you mind? Not all.. if I have any questions I know where to find you. Okay thanks. Hey.. what were you thinking for dinner? And before you answer I don’t hear anything that start with the word beet. Pea let out a little laugh and said fine... I hadn’t thought about it.. you pick and I will eat. Cool, have a good workout. Thanks! Pea left the study feeling more nervous than ever. How was she going to choke down any kind of food.. for one she didn’t have any type of appetite and for two.. even if she did.. her teeth were aching her so badly that she wouldn’t be able to chew it. She would have to think of a clever way to stall him out.

Marissa was so happy with the way dinner turned out for her Butch and Havers she had been a giddy mood all week. Havers had come with fully open arms it was obvious that he had missed her as well. They talked before, during and after the meal, after all it had been two years since they last spoke to each other. She learned that he still visited his late wife parents every Sunday just like he did when she was alive. She also learned that he had began toying with the idea of training another physician to help assist him with his workload. Between births, injuries, sickness and crime.. he was busy around the clock. That cause concern for Marissa because Havers was unhealthy himself. She didn’t want to get into the blood transfusions that he was administering to himself but she knew that issue definitely had to be addressed soon. Havers prolly went from a healthy weight of 200lbs prior to his shellen dying to the 125lbs that sat across from her at the dinner table. Butch was also caught by surprise when he realized that they both were Red Sox fans... they both preferred a good scotch to any other liquor and both like the same types of music. At one point during the evening Butch even referred to him as bro-n-law. Havers also informed Marissa that the families of the glymera had decided to hold their annual crown ball. Traditionally meant for highest and Nobelist families to pay ridiculously amounts of money to rub elbows with King and Queen for the evening. It included fine dining and dancing. However since the king took so long to ascend to the throne.. and even afterwards the tradition was halted. So now that Wrath has taken his place and disbanded the old glymera counsel. The newly appointed heads of each family decided it was time to start holding the crown balls again. Marissa was surprised when she heard about it and wondered if the King and Queen would be willing to participate. The donations would help her add additional rooms on to A Safe Place. After that they all agreed that they would do it again real soon and Marissa was anxious to call him now. I never thought I of all people would be saying this but I kind of feel sorry for the guy. Butch said to Rhage, V, & Phury for years I’ve wanted nothing more than to kill him for what he did my wife but after hearing his story it’s kinda hard to hate the bastard. Phury looked over at Butch and said so he’s been in mourning all this time? Wow. V chimed in as he sat back on the bench press machine and said he has been in mourning times 2 don’t forget the young. Rhage stopped the treadmill ... I can’t begin to imagine life without my Mary or Bitty but it still doesn’t excuse the fact that he put Marissa out just before sunrise. I’d hate to be in your shoes. Then to top things off We have stuff in common... V he’s a Sox fan!!! He listens to hip hop not this new crap either I’m talking Biggie, Tupac, Nas, Jay-z.... They all stop what were doing turned to Butch and said in unison Havers?!?!... then burst into laughter. Down in the library Lassiter settled in with a cup of tea and picked up the next journal which was the story of Danger son of Danger. Just as he opened the book Bitty came in with her iPad. Looking for a quiet place to study? Lassiter asked. Yea, my mom wants me learn a second language so I chose Spanish. I thought it would be a lot more interesting than what it actually is. What are you doing? Same thing only I’m not learning a second language, I’m learning about the brotherhood and how it all came to be. Well that sounds a lot more interesting than this. I suppose it does, hey you want to help me plan a party? Bitty perked up. Yes who’s it for? Pea she is coming up on her last week here with us and I’d like to host a going away party for her. Sure I’d love to help with that, but wait I thought she lived in the city. She does. So then why are we giving her a party? Won’t she be coming back to visit us? Lassiter responded, well she’s really busy and I don’t know when we will have time to do this again. Oh okay, I really like Pea, she makes the best beet smoothies not to thick and not too thin. I much rather drink one of Peas smoothies then eat my vegetables, Bitty said with a innocent smile. After yoga Pea sat in the kitchen nursing a bottle of water listening to Marissa tell Beth about the Crown Ball.. to be honest the event sounded like something that could be really nice with the right people in charge. But she knew that even if Beth wanted to attend the big hurdle would be convincing Wrath that this would be worth his time. Wrath loathed any kind of attention from the families of the glymera. He knew that they didn’t care for him particularly because of the woman he chose as his queen was a halfbred. Wrath didn’t give a shit though after all who was going challenge the King. “ Crown Ball does sound like something that could benefit everyone” I know you want me to mention it to Wrath however I think for better affect we both may need to tackle him with this one. I can’t make any promises we both know how my hellren feels about that group of people. Pea left them and went to the study to find Lassiter she purposely sat in the kitchen to stall for time. The thought of trying to eat something made bile rise up in the back of her throat. Luck was on side this evening, by the time she arrived back to the library Lassiter was gone. Pea quickly jotted down a note left beside the stack journals and went to her room. Lassiter couldn’t even focus when Tohr gave out the assignments in the meeting, he was so overwhelmed with the information in the last journal. He knew that every line recorded in those journals was true. Every person, mating, birth, event, fight, every single thing that the Scribe had chronicled was all true. So this in fact had to be. Lassiter had been repeatedly re-reading the last sentence on the last page over and over again. “And the Kingdoms people shall be ruled with Wrath and Serenity” .. when he went back there, he had planned on addressing Pea but instead of finding her.. there was note in her place. “ came to see what’s for dinner but you were gone :( , gone to take shower and relax, maybe tomorrow?” Why couldn’t I see this from the beginning.. She can’t leave this house on Sunday.

Paging Dr. Havers code Blue, code blue Dr. Havers... not again. This happens every time I start my transfusion. Havers stopped the IV pump, removed the IV from his blistered arm, rolled Down his sleeve, grabbed his lab coat and headed back upstairs. These attacks were happening to frequently now.. im having a hard time keeping up with my treatments. What do we have? Young male just out of change, mom says he went hiking behind his house , he had been gone for 4 hours which was not normal for him. She started calling his cellphone and didn’t receive an answer so she went searching for him. When she got to the edge of property she could see his jacket in the bushes. He appeared to be beaten badly with bad cut to his rib cage. Julie let’s get him in OR 2 he losing a lot of blood. Another long day these attacks are getting more gruesome, this time I had to remove a small part of the small intestines the bleeding and the wounds were just to badly damaged. Since this kid was a lot younger he was hoping to talk to him once he awoke from the surgery. It shouldn’t take long for the kid to recover. Maybe he could get some details to pass along to his brother in law. It still seemed so strange to be on talking terms with his sister. Havers started feeling unlike himself after that 2nd hour of surgery. He actually felt weak.. he knew that he couldn’t neglect anymore transfusions because the outcome could be deadly or even worst than that he could get bloodlust. With shakey hands and a hungry stomach he made it through the procedure then left explicit directions with his nurse that he under NO circumstances was to be bothered. When he got back downstairs in his private lab and removed his lab coat, he could feel a sharp pain starting at his wrist and shooting up his left arm. When pulled his shirt back he could see there was blood clot under the skin at the wrist area. He quickly began rubbing applying pressure to dissolve it. He just wasn’t healing as quickly as he should be and this was starting to be a big problem.

Lassiter had been avoiding Pea purposely for the past few days. He knew her time with him was coming to an end and was trying find another solution. He also knew that she wouldn’t mind because she had become quite found of hanging out with ladies or having tea & gossip with Mary, Manny, and Jane. She actually fit right in here, of course she fit right in she is one of us. After all the reading I’ve done this is what I come up with?nothing, nothing, not a thang. All roads lead back to her. At that moment Lassiter looked up and said out load to no one in particular, Really!! All that reading... with a deep breath Lassiter thought No need to prolong the inevitable. He arrived back at the brotherhood mansion it was right before first meal the doggen had the table set and people were already stirring about inside the house. Quinn and Blay were getting the twins seated in there high chairs. John & Xhex were playing with LW while Beth was helping the doggen arrange all the food. Everyone was slowly making there way to diningroom everyone except for Pea that is. Lassiter went down the hall and knocked on Peas room door... Pea heard the knock and said one second. The pain she was in this morning was the worst!! Nothing was working anymore.. she had to leave this house today! She gathered herself as best she could and answered the door. Oh Hi, I wasn’t expecting you this early, what’s up? Lassiter for the first time could see the pain in her eyes.. we need to talk. Okay sure, I was wondering when would I see you again... Pea opened the door and went back to sit in the edge of the bed. I have a question for you and I need the truth. Okay. Whats your question? What is your name? Lassiter you know my name... Lassiter began shaking his head back and forth don’t bullshit me, I know the name you gave me which is Pea.. But what is your name your real name the name given to you by your mahmen at birth. With deep exhale Pea stood up and said fine.. my name is Serenity.. Lassiter went to the velvet high back chair that sat across from bed and dropped in the seat like a log. He starting scrubbing hands down his face leaned back and said you cannot leave. Pea looked over in his direction and said we had a deal. I know we had a deal but that was... No, no, no... no buts... our deal was I train you for three weeks and no matter WHAT you found out I get to leave and walk away. I cannot let you leave!! Holding up the journal he asked what does this say? Tell me what does it say?! I am very capable of taking care of myself.. this is not about you taking care of yourself. Tell me what does it say? Wrath and Beth are going a great job... they don’t need me. Lassiter calmed himself and said...Pea, look at yourself? Is pain getting any better? Do you think it is just gonna go away?! Sweetheart that’s not how this works and you know it... you cannot leave this house. I will be fine! You won’t be... I’ve managed this long... You’ve managed because you weren’t in the company of the only other person that is just like you... you can’t stop your transition... Fine... I’ll leave now..and send for my things.. I need to get back to my life anyway. Pea.. was so frustrated she walked out of the room without even grabbing her Birkin bag. As she got closer to main diningroom she could feel Lassiter behind her ... aren’t you going to at least tell them goodbye? I think they deserved that much Pea turned around shot him a nasty glare and headed towards the dininroom. Everyone was there and breakfast was in full swing... perfect she thought to herself just what need a bigger audience.

Good day everyone, I just wanted to stop in to say my goodbyes. I have to leave today, I have emergency that needs my attention. I didn’t have time to gather my things Lassiter will drop them off later. Beth and Wrath I thank you so much for your hospitality my stay here was perfect in every way. Pea turned to Lassiter and said I’m ready. Lassiter gave Pea a level stare and said I must do what is best for the good of everyone. He then stepped around Pea and said to Wrath she cannot leave this house. It is a matter of life and death, it is not safe for her... you have to order her to stay! Order me??!!, I will be fine No you won’t, you are in pain as we speak! Do you think those baths are going to stop this process? I will be fine. You will die? You don’t know that... I can take care of myself. When is the last time you ate a meal? A full meal? Do you think those beets are gonna help you get through this? Wrath cut in, Lassiter if she wants to leave I will not make her stay... Thank you Wrath... Fine... you want to leave? I will personally drop you off myself but first tell him your name. Tell him your birth name given to you by your mahmen.. and I won’t say another word. Pea looked at Wrath and spoke in the old language ... “my name makes no difference a Queen has been chosen”.... knowing my name changes nothing... At that moment everyone at the table who understood the old language stopped eating and slowly turned their heads and faced Pea... Then tell him.. Pea spoke in English this time.. my name is Serenity I am the daughter and only living child of Sir Danger son of Danger the highest princeps the last surviving member of the last founding family. The next sound everyone heard was a loud crash of a fine sliver tea set hit the floor. And the person who dropped it? Fritz! The doggen stepped across the mess of spilled tea, cream and honey and walked towards Pea with both hands over his mouth. Tis you? Pea looked at Fritz with a tear rolling down her cheek and said yes its me. As she reached her hand to touch his cheek she said in the old language your sacrifice saved me..my protector.. my servant, my friend and I live because of you. Then she turned to face Lassiter and said I will leave now.

Before could Lassiter could respond.. Pea started walking toward the front door. Need a ride? Yes please. And then she was gone.

Fritz , frazzled turned to face Wrath.. apologies sire. I will have the mess clean right away. His servants snapped into action. Meanwhile everyone at the table was totally silent.. some from shock and the others didn’t know what to say. Wrath handed LW over Beth , backed away from the table and headed towards the stairs with George in tow. Without saying another word one by one all the brotherhood got up and followed suit. Lassiter and Xcor being the last two to enter his study. As soon as Lassiter entered Wrath asked... how long have you known Sounding exhausted Lassiter responded... a few days now... And you just now saying something. How can you be sure it’s her... Lassiter pulled out the journal flipped to The last page and gave it to Tohr... who then looked at it and read it aloud “and the kingdom... Wrath cut him off and finished “shall be ruled by Wrath and Serenity... But still how can you be certain it’s really her? The Scribe Virgin left the address to store she owns in one of the journals. I found the address and checked it out before I read the journal. I went there located her and we made a deal that she would help me with translating all the material left to me. In return after three weeks she could leave no questions asked. This was before you found out who she was? Correct Zadist spoke up... why do you think she is going to die? She hasn’t been through the transition yet.. someone said wait how is that even possible? another Fuck.. came through the crowd Lassiter looked over at Vishous who’s response was let me guess. My mom had something to do with this? And from what I gather, she was fine until she came in presence of the only person that could trigger it. Lucky Me.. Wrath said So what do we do? V said to Lassiter I don’t know, all I know is that if we don’t do something she will die. Butch spoke up and said.._Well there are plenty of men that I’m sure would be happy to assist her with getting through the transition, hell we have a house full of single men all she has to do is chose. It’s not that simple, Tohr responded. Then Wrath spoke up, It has to be me.. it’s my duty. As your king I believe in being totally transparent with you especially because you all are my brothers. Then Wrath took a deep breath and said. I need to save her.. I can feel it in my chest... She can’t die. So then Xcor said... what’s the move?

Downstairs the ladies were trying to wrap their heads around what had just happened. Beth sat back in her chair and asked who is Serenity daughter in Danger? Both Bella and Marissa started speaking at once... Serenity... the both looked at each other... Marissa spoke first.. long story short.. she is the female version of Wrath. She is the last full blood female vampire. Bella started talking by this point. According to our scriptures and everything we were taught... That whole family was murdered in the war that took place in the old country. I’m talking no survivors much like Wrath’s family was. So then how did she survive? Beth asked. At that time Fritz, who had re-entered the room clear his throat. Ah-hum... Madam if it would not offend I can answer that question for you. Beth quickly summoned Fritz to the table to have a seat.. please share with me.

Balthazar, Of all people... she ended up in the car with Balthazar. But hell anything to get out of that house and off of that mountain. She had been so successful for centuries keeping her true identity a secret and now that was all over. However she wasn’t about to worry about it because there were more pressing issues. She was not well, her joints were on fire and she felt like she was hit in the mouth. So where are you headed? Balthazar asked. You can just drop me off at my house. Okay After a moment or two of silence Balthazar said, I need your address and you don’t look well. He was right Peas health was declining fast. I live off of Wallace avenue and yea I know.... more silence more driving. Pea tried to adjust herself in the seat to find some comfort however nothing worked. Once on Wallace avenue Pea said White House black shutters. Balthazar pulled in slowly and Pea had never been so happy to see her home. Do you need some help inside, yes please. Balthazar put the car in park then opened his door and went around to the passenger side and opened the door for Pea. She was able to brace herself enough so that she didn’t have to put all her weight on him. He started walking her in the direction of the front door but she remembered that her keys were in her Birkin that she left at the mansion. Through the garage.. huh... let’s go through the garage, I don’t have my keys. Keys, Balthazar said with a smirk, who needs keys? We are not breaking into my house, we can use the keyless entry pad and go through the garage door. Fine we can do it your way... Pea went over to the keypad that sat at the top right panel and was painted the same color as the garage door she punched in the code 0820 and the door been to lift from the bottom. Inside her truck was right where she left it untouched... Nice Balthazar said looking at the Bentley truck.as they were walking past it he nodded his head towards door the opened to inside of the house. Can we get in there? It should already be open and it was. Pea was able to make it to her kitchen table on her on. I’m the last person to get in anybody’s business but are you sure you don’t want me to call someone. Because no offense but you look like shit. Well thank you and I will be okay I just need to get some rest. Okay well then I will let myself out and don’t worry about closing the garage I got It. So Pea sat the table another 10 minutes then stood up went back to the kitchen door opened it made sure that her garage door was closed, which it was then she closed the kitchen door and locked it. She used the security keypad in her kitchen to set the house alarm and then she went downstairs. Pea had purposely purchased a house with a basement for this reason alone. She was to a point where couldn’t protect herself due to her body trying to transition. The basement door had separate keypad which used a fingerprint for entry once the door disengaged the lights on the stairwell automatically came on ... Pea took her time and went step by step because the last thing she needed was to slip and fall. Once she reached the bottom of the stairs she could see the bed promised to be comfortable and to her right she opened the door to the bathroom... the full bathroom was nice addition to the basement because Pea didn’t have to go up 2 flights of stairs to shower. She looked at garden tub that was in the corner but she was wise enough to not try getting in there. Instead she turned on the shower water hot as she could stand it. She removed her clothes and got in. The hot water felt amazing on Peas skin but she could barely stand so with one hand on the safety rail She reached and turned the water off. Pea stepped out toweled off as best she could and put on her emerald green satin bathrobe. She took 2 steps out of the bathroom and toward the bed before her knees turned to jelly. Pea cried out in pain & fell to her knees in agony. Breathe deep just breathe deep she thought to herself. You can make it to the bed, you got this,.... Pea laid on the floor for another few minutes or it could have been a few hours before she tried to move again. This time instead of standing she crawled to side of her bed. She pushed the covers back and brushed the pillows to other side... you can do this.. you can get in bed... on the count of three girl let’s do it... 1...2...3 PULL.... Pea pulled herself up got in bed and pulled the duvet up enough to cover her waist on down. She broke out into a cold sweat as a sharp pain ripped through her gut... she thought well this is it.. this is how I will die and then passed out.

Havers gave himself one transfusion per day over the past three days and that seemed to be working. He started feeling more like himself, he was able to get rest which helped his energy levels return back to normal and he even had a little bit of an appetite. So by all accounts he was doing good. He had spoken with his sister who had informed him that she had spoken to the Queen about possibly participating in this years Crown Ball. They had a meeting with Wrath set for tomorrow and overall she was very optimistic about it. They also scheduled a lunch date with each other for Friday afternoon she would come over to the clinic this time. Havers hadn’t thought much about the menu but he knew all of his sisters favorite foods so that part was easy. Hi Dr. Havers the patient in room 4 has awaken, Okay that’s good Julie I will be right in there. The patient from last night was found by her neighbor dehydrated and disoriented. Dorothy stated she hadn’t seen her for a couple days and she couldn’t get answer on the phone so she walked over to the house to do a warfare check and there was Ms. Hunt sitting in the her favorite chair in front of the tv completely disoriented. Dorothy called out to her a couple of times before she turned her head and made eye contact. Dorothy called Havers and he sent over the ambulance to transport her to the clinic. That’s one downside to out living your spouse and growing older if you can’t afford doggen or a caregiver, the elderly are left to fin for themselves and unfortunately Ms. Hunt was showing all the signs of dementia. Hi Ms. Hunt how are you doing this evening? I am fine. Good, do you know where you are? Yes Dr. Havers I’m at your clinic. So you know who I am then. Yes sir, you are Dr. Havers. Yes ma’am and do you remember how you got here. The elderly woman got quiet Havers could tell that she was trying to remember what she did last but was having no luck. Ms. Hunt it is quite alright if you can’t recall all that matters is getting you back hydrated and healthy. Havers told Julie to put in a call to A Safe Place and explain the situation he was sure that his sister would be able to assist the women. Back in his office Havers felt a little peckish so he started eating some white rice made with coconut milk and covered in Ginger sauce. It was the only thing that he could keep on his stomach. He was hoping all the starch would help me out some weight back on. His mind rain back to the old women and her situation she had not been the first elderly patient that he treated for dehydration but her condition had definitely been the worse. It was a bummer not having any children or relatives to help take of you. Havers thought about how they took care of his mahmen until the very end. Then he glanced over at the two 4x6 pictures frames that were faced down on his desk. The pain was still fresh as if it happened yesterday and all he could do was just stare at the two objects that held what was left of a life he once lived. Someday he will have the strength to either stand them upright or put them away for good.

There was knock outside of Wrath’s office door before he could asked who is it, Beth answered it’s me Wrath we need to talk. She is the only person that could ever get away with interrupting a botherhood meeting. Meeting adjourned, you may enter . John opened the door and was the first out followed by all the rest. Beth said to them stay close by I won’t be long. Beth let everyone out then she walked in with LW on her hip, her hellren back up from his desk and stood to greet her. LW reached for his father as he always did and Wrath happily accepted him into his arms. Wrath sat back down in his chair and Beth sat on his lap. You have to save her Wrath... I know who she is and what she was meant to be. She is too important to the out race to let go, she belongs here with us. Wrath pulled his leelan close nuzzled his nose close to vein in her neck that he fed from and whispered I love you and I don’t deserve you. With a giggle Beth put her hands on the sides of her hellrens face and pulled him in close kissed him and said ... Let us go so that you can get back to work. I will send everyone back inside Beth opened the door thank everyone for their patience and sent them all back inside. After everyone was back in the office Wrath said we will be going to get Pea. Lassiter do you know where we can find her? She left in the car with Balthazar Xcor said, I will hit him up and see where he took her. Xcor called Balthazar put him on speaker right then.. What’s happening? The female Pea left here with you correct? Yes I dropped her off on Wallace Ave, White House black shutters.... after a moment Balthazar added if y’all going to get her, y’all might want to hurry because when I left there she was in bad shape. With that the line ended.. Lassiter spoke up I have the address and Butch said we have been there before I can get back there in no time. Wrath said I’m coming with you, I have too. With Wrath coming that meant all hands on deck. The brotherhood along with the band of bastards would be on high alert. We will meet downstairs in 10mins let’s move. With that everyone left the office went and put their gear on. Rhage walked into his room and saw Mary laying across the bed even though he received direct orders from the king he was drawn over to the bed. He couldn’t help himself... He bent over and dropped his big chest against Marys little body.. she greeted him with a smile on her face and said well hello you. To what do I owe this pleasure he bent down to kiss either side her neck and all of a sudden he felt need to feed. He fought the urge kissed her and then pulled back up to face her. You smell amazing..did you change shampoos or soaps? He let up off the bed and headed towards the walk-in closet. We have to go get Pea and bring her back here.. so I will be gone for a while. Okay, I’m happy that Wrath has decided to have her brought back here. Yea, he is actually coming along this time. With a yawn Mary said please be careful honey. Always, I love you and I will see you when I return. With that Rhage shut door and headed towards the stairs. When he reached the bottom he was joined Zadist, Phury, Butch, Zcor, & Quinn. Within minutes everyone else was there and they were loading into a series of vehicles. When the king left the mansion everyone was on top of their shit. . As they road Wrath was mentally preparing himself for the worst remembering how badly his transition and beat him down. 10mins later Butch was making the right intron Wallace Ave when they pulled into the driveway. Vishous through up an mhis then The security detail got out and swept the area first before Wrath’s door was opened. Once everything in the perimeter was clear Tohrment opened the back door for Wrath. He got out and head straight for the front door Wrath hit the doorbell a couple of times and then said to Vishous we have to get inside. She has a security system wire to house let me see if I can bypass it, the last thing we need is human law enforcement to show up. Balthazar started speaking as he walked closer to the porch go through the garage the code is 0820... I dropped her off earlier remember. So they went to garage door tohrment put in to code and door began to lift from the bottom. They all walked passed her Bentley truck to the door that opened into the house. This time it was locked But Vishous had no issues bypassing the alarm from the inside. He opened the door that led into the kitchen and Wrath made a beeline pass him to the door that lead to the basement. She’s down here open it! Vishous said this one has a fingerprint keypad may take a minute. The next thing Wrath heard was a large bang which was V using his fist to completely knock down the keypad. Tohr said it still won’t open so they stood back while he kicked the door in. The lights on the stairwell flickered on and off as Zadist went in first followed by Butch & Rhage then Wrath after him Phury, Vishous & Tohr. John, Quinn and Balthazar remained at the top of the stairwell for security protocol. Once they got to the bottom they saw Pea in bed overcome with fever, washed down in sweat. Everyone positioned themselves in a corner of the basement making sure they each had full view of the door. Wrath pulled back the Duvet carefully so that he wouldn’t expose any of her private areas and then he did his best to swaddle her with the top sheet on the bed.. he carefully placed one hand under the middle of her back and the other under the bend in her knees then as gently as he could he lifted her up off the bed. He turned around and sat down so that she was in his lap. Pea could smell Wrath but she was too weak to open her eyes, she wanted to tell him no please don’t try to save me. But her throat was so dry she felt like she swallowed a cotton ball dipped in Habanero sauce. When Wrath bent down to pick her up she could feel his hair and smell those dark spices all over him. Her fangs elongated for the first time. Even though her mind was screaming no, no, no anybody but him.. her body was reacting otherwise. When Wrath lifted her up she let out a little grunt from the pain... then she felt him sit down Wrath heard the grunt and whispered I’m sorry as he placed Pea in his lap. Wrath scored his wrist and held it up to Peas mouth. Pea you need this to survive please open for me. He rubbed his wrist across her mouth but he could tell that she was fighting her natural instincts to feed. Pea could smell Wrath’s blood but would not feed. Instead she opened her mouth fought through the pain in her throat and whispered “Beth is Queen”. Wrath responded yes Beth is Queen and the Queen sent me to get you please drink. He put his wrist back to her mouth but she gave another grunt and turned her mouth away from Wrath. Pea repeated “Beth is Queen”... Wrath knew what he needed to do. Wrath licked his wrist to seal the two punctures then pushed his hair back to expose the vein in his neck then he titled Peas face back toward him. In the old language he said, “ My Queen take from me what you need to nourish your body, as your King I am here to serve you” then he moved her up against his jugular vein and said” Now feed from my vein so that we may become one”. With that Pea lifted her head opened her mouth and struck Wrath hard. When Pea struck Wrath a force of raw energy and light emitted from them that was so strong it shook the house foundation and blew the men up against the basement walls. Wrath’s iridescent eyes were glowing at this point and he looked massive. Pea drank with great pulls she could instantly feel Wrath’s blood coursing through her veins. She took as much of Wrath’s blood as her belly could hold, released his neck, licked the wounds and passed out in his arms. Once Pea passed out Wrath stood cradling her close to his chest... looked around at his men whose eyes were also glowing and gave two orders. Rhage & Z grabbed the chest At the foot of the bed and let’s move out NOW! Butch hit the stairs first followed by Rhage & Z carrying the chest then Wrath carrying Pea after him Tohr, Vishous and Phury. When they got to the top of the stairs Quinn, John & Balathzar had recovered from the house shacking and were ready to lead the way back out. The force of energy that came out of Wrath and Pea had set off car alarms and had dogs barking & howling up and down the block. Xcor radioed to V we need to move now my guys smell trouble. Roger that let’s move guys everyone keep your eyes open. Butch, Tohr , Wrath & Pea were inside the ESV in under 30 seconds. V & Phury took Peas Bentayga and Everyone else loaded back into the same vehicles they arrived in. Just as they were leaving Pea came too this time she was able to open her eyes... Wrath tilted his head to one side again and spoke “don’t try to think just feed from me my Queen”... again Pea couldn’t control her hunger she struck Wrath’s vein hard again and took everything he had to offer. This time Wrath tried to brace himself for it but it was no use as soon as Pea struck his vein the force of raw energy shot from between them and this time they blew the transformer at the end of the block. Butch put on the high beams and followed Quinn out. Pea released Wrath after a few pulls completely satisfied. She closed her eyes and let sleep take her. When they got to the end of the block Wrath said to Havers, she has to go to Havers. Tohr radioed the change to everyone and Butch made the left to head over to Havers. Vishous went ahead and called into the clinic to reserve the private suite that was meant for exclusive clients like them. Wrath stayed there when he was shot rescuing Beth and then Butch had stayed there when the Omega got ahold of him. Now they needed it again this time for Pea. Havers would have questions as he usually does however this time Wrath was there to do the talking. The ESV pulled up to the clinic Ehlena and Havers nurse Julie were already standing outside under the breezeway waiting with a wheelchair. Julie was a trained professional and had been exposed to many different types Of people working in the clinic. Members of the glymera, older aristocratics, government officials but never the King. She tried her best to keep her composure when Tohr swung open the door to ESV hopped out walked to the back door and opened it. However inside she wanted to jump up and down and scream as if she was at a Beyoncé concert. The King emerged from the back seat and he was massive. Aah follow me your highness... Julie turned the wheelchair around and quickly walked back up the breezeway. They walked through private entrance, entered the hall passed through a door label Janitors closet, once they got in there Wrath had to turn sideways to pass through the air tunnel holding Pea. In the room Wrath carefully placed Pea on the gurney and stepped out of the way. Ehlena quickly took Peas vitals while Julie grabbed the needle and tubbing to start an IV. We are going to start her on some fluids Dr. Havers will be in shortly. Where is he now? He is finishing up with a surgery then he will be right over. Wrath turned to Ehlena and said I can not wait call me when he comes in and then walked back out. Pea felt the slight sting and the cold fluids going into her vein, her body had taken a real beating and she needed rest. Ehlena and Julie worked together to unwrap Pea out of the sheet and remove her bathrob and put it in the dirty laundry basket. They put a hospital gown on her and began to chart all of her basic info. Julie wanted ask Ehlena who this women was but she didn’t want to overstep. Maybe Dr. Havers would be able to fill her in, he was a part of the glymera surely he would know who this women was. Wrath and Tohr entered the hall to exit the building they met Lassiter walking in. Don’t worry I’m just here to sit with her. Are you sure that you want to do that? Yea, I owe her. Lassiter entered the same doorway that he saw Wrath and Tohr come out of. He walked by the monitors then entered the air shower. When he got into Peas room he was greeted by Ehlena and another nurse. Before she could ask him any questions he quickly told her that the king ordered him to stay with the patient. Ehlena followed up with “he’s apart of the kings private staff it’s fine” ... When they both left Lassiter went and stood by Peas beside. The transition hadn’t really changed her much that he could see well except for fangs of course but you couldn’t see those. He whispered to himself, You are something special aren’t you? Then he took a step back and went to sit in the recliner in the corner found the remote and turned on tv. Let’s see what’s on the boob tube.

It had been a long time since Havers received a call from the Brotherhood requesting his assistance. He wanted to be there to when they arrived however he was smack dab in the middle of another surgery. It looked like someone took a sling blade to this poor guys chest and abdomen. The brother Vishous had informed him that there would be someone coming from the kings private staff to assist with this patient. He finished up the surgery which turned out to be an intensive 5 hour ordeal, then while he was on his way to his office to change a code Blue came in. and that sent right back in the OR for another 4 hour surgery. When he was finally able to leave there, he went to his office changed out of his OR scrubs took a quick shower to refresh himself, dressed in his normal attire. Grabbed his lab coat and headed towards the private suite. As he passed by the nurses station he saw Ehlena sitting with Julie and invited her to come along with him that way she could chart while he examined the patient. When they entered the little room Havers checked the monitors and could see there was someone sitting with patient. He reviewed the notes taken when the patient was triaged by Julie, it appeared to be a normal transition nothing major he passed it off to Ehlena and started to get dressed to go through walk through the air tunnel. Havers opened the door to the Air Tunnel an was greeted by a tall man with piercings and black/blonde hair. The man was apparently introducing himself but Havers couldn’t concentrate because there was an aroma in the room that was absolutely devine. It smelled like shea butter, winterberries and peppermint he knew he should be focusing on what this man was saying, as he is a member of the Kings staff. But he was too intoxicated by the lovely scent, ... I’m merely here to sit with patient, per the Kings orders. Havers nodded his head yes in response to the gentleman then stepped around him so that he could get a view of his patient. The patient lying before him i

[thissupposedcrime]

jealous of the nights (that I don’t spend with you) (wip)

When Yuri is nine, he names his cat Puma Tiger Scorpion. He never regrets it.

In hindsight, that sort of behavior was a neon bright sign of things to come.

“You haven’t spoken to me in three days because you had a dream I liked someone else?” Otabek’s sigh is heavy.

“A nightmare,” Yuri corrects cooly, unsure if his tone should be outraged or Lilia-Pointed-but-Proper.

Yuri’s not one to victim blame, but honestly, Beka should have expected something like this from him.

(pieces of a sequel to every time I try, every time I win that I’m working on)

When Yuri is nine, he names his cat Puma Tiger Scorpion.

A decade later, he stands by the decision.

In hindsight, that sort of behavior was a neon bright sign of things to come.

“You haven’t spoken to me in three days because you had a dream I liked someone else?” Otabek’s sigh is heavy.

“A nightmare,” Yuri corrects cooly, unsure if his tone should be outraged or Lilia-Pointed-but-Proper.

Yuri’s not one to victim blame, but honestly, Beka should have expected something like this from him.

Let’s bring this story back to the start, then the present.

Yuri at seventeen: cheeks flushed by the Russian cold, by the embarrassment that trails him like a shadow whenever Victor hangs off Yuuri, mouth bitten red, first by his own angry teeth as he gnaws down on the vile oaths he wants to hurt at the chests of men who catch Otabek’s attention, and later by Otabek’s own mouth, soothing because of the force, the intensity of kissing Yuri back; golds, silvers, and bronzes pretty collars around his neck when his limbs aren’t out of control.

Yuri at twenty: cheeks flushed from Mila’s prodding about Otabek, a metaphorical battering ram going through his phone and sending selfies to Otabek and hosting a password protected group chat of Katsuki, Victor, and Mila on Yuri’s phone; mouth bitten red because at some point during his tenure with Yakov he learned silence was a viable option but goddamn is it hard, mouth bitten red to match the trail of hickeys under his clothes; golds and silvers, no room for bronze, pretty collars around his neck, swan graceful once again and the apple of Lilia’s eye.

Otabek in the years before, during, and after: Yuri’s.

Unfortunately, it’s Yuri himself who occasionally forgets that fact.

Day Six

The thing is, Mila doesn’t call. Text him vague threats when he first began dating Yuri, speaking not just for her own protective instincts but also the vengeful wrath of the Russian Skating Federation, specifically members coached by Yakov? Absolutely. Tag him across the spectrum of social media accounts he is lovingly bullied to use at least once a month? Constantly. Send him adorable pictures as Yuri cuddles with his cat or breathtakingly lovely images of Yuri, taken as his back creates a graceful arc on the ice? Happily and with pleasure. So when he ends practice to see three missed calls, two voice mails, and a few texts, his heart plummets out of his body, sinking past the changing room floor, to the core of the earth. Yuri. His Yuri. Famed composure abandons him as his fingers shake, thumb pressing the call button. He can’t control his limbs long enough to remove his second skate. The taste of bile might be permanently ingrained on his tongue at this rate, a disgust he will gladly cope with the moment someone reassures him Yuri hasn’t wound up in the hospital or the local jail. He’s not sure which is less plausible.  

God he hopes it’s jail. “Otabek!” Mila’s voice calls him to attention, almost sing-song as it separates the syllables of his name. Immediately, Otabek’s panic mellows, a dull thrum instead of a thumping beat. “Is Yuri okay?” His voice doesn’t waver, but he still can’t manage to stop the nervous twitch of his fingers. “Your boyfriend is being especially bratty,” she declares, and Otabek realizes he’s in for a new hell. Normally, Mila refuses to claim Yuri as one of hers when he’s being a dick, but she sounds happier than past experiences allow. Her voice is musical, teasing, and Otabek understands Yuri can hear them. Faintly, “You hag! Put down your damn phone and check your makeup. The wrinkles are showing!” echoes across the miles between Almaty and St. Petersburg. “See? Such an ugly mood for our Yura,” she croons, and clearly he has become spectator not participant. “HANG UP THE PHONE!” “No!” There’s a crash in the background, more shrieks. Otabek puts the phone on speaker and places it on the locker room bench while he sips his water, grateful to lose the sick taste in his mouth from before. He’s managed to remove his other skate and change his shirt before Mila returns, victorious in abandoning Yuri but simultaneously riling him up with the knowledge Otabek is about to know something. Otabek is glad his relationship with his family does not reflect in the Mila-Yuri dynamic. “Ah, that was fun.” She sounds winded for a professional athlete, but Otabek doesn’t comment, slightly impatient for her to tell him about Yuri now that he’s calmed. “Is Yuri okay?” He starts again. “You tell me.” “I don’t understand.” “Has Yuri been off when you speak?” Mila asks, no longer breathless. Ah. This indeed is something for him to deal with. “What has he done?” “I have a list,” she announces brightly. A brief cough, a hum of her throat follow, and Otabek wonders if there’s something in the water at Yakov’s rink considering his least dramatic student of the past decade was Georgi Popovich. (Yuri is the love of his life, but he thrives on dysfunction to an alarming extent. Otabek understands this and accepts it as best he’s able; it is why they’ve managed to stay together for the past three years.) “To start, he refused to leave practice yesterday. Victor chased him around for nearly twenty minutes until he caught him and dragged him off. Did you see my upload?” “No, but I’ll check when we’re done speaking.” He hopes it isn’t on Instagram. He doesn’t want to deal with the comments from Yuri’s fans.

“It’s on Instagram!”

Naturally.

“Yuri keeps growling at one of our skaters, a boy named Dmitry. We’ve found him crying under a table in the break room four times this week. For some reason, he’s wearing a helmet and runs out of the room whenever Yuri enters. Do you know about that?”

“I forgot you had a Dmitry at your rink,” Otabek replies flatly, memory blank as he tries to recall Yuri ever mentioning a Dmitry.

“Yuri calls him Tiny Bastard if that helps?” Mila offers, and Otabek sighs.

It does. Tragically, it does.

That damn dream.

Sometimes Otabek wonders if he’s become more dramatic since Yuri twirled his way into the center of his universe.

This phone call is all the proof he needs.

“Those pains in the ass are talking about kids!” Yuri shouts across the kitchen, voice somewhat tinny over the speakerphone, hands busy making dinner.

“They’re getting another dog?” Otabek replies, half listening as he reviews the new diet plan suggested for him, nose wrinkling in disappointment in his own kitchen in Almaty.

“I trust them with poodles,” Otabek hears a faint huff and pictures Yuri blowing stray wisps of blond hair out of his face. It brings up a pang of longing and another needless reminder of the long month since their last reunion.

“A human child Beka.”

“You’ll always be my favorite Yura.” It’s an achingly sincere statement.

“That’s not-” A loud exhale. “Thank you, but don’t start with that. I’m the only one who realizes how unhealthy codependency is apparently. I’m worried about what they’d do to a child, not what their child would do to me.”

“I’m confident they wouldn’t send it cowering under a kitchen table in the break room four times a week,” Otabek offers and hums an acknowledgement while Yuri starts cursing Mila’s name. 

Guess who remembered she needs to get back into writing Yuri on Ice if she ever wants to finish soldier boy

For those of you unfamiliar with my past work, Otabek references a fit Yuri threw after having a dream Otabek, his boyfriend and later fiancee, was in love with a Russian skater, one he never even met. From there, an anon begged me to write this.

I felt this would be a better attempt at remembering the voices and characterization than a WIP so well liked but also on such a long hiatus (soldier boy). 

also my friend @dizzytea said the original story is a comfort fic so I thought I’d bring more joy. 

gonna try to have this out this by this time next week, if not sooner if I can keep it under 8k.

[khazadspoon]

(Ok in the vein of Bitter Angry Wrathful Thomas fic here is a piece post series. It is rather Silver critical and I have complex opinions on him. This is more a reaction to the idea that Thomas would take anything, including James’ incarceration in the plantation with him, lightly or laying down. So here, take it)

–

They had spoken of Captain Flint on the third day. James started after evening prayer and finished as the moon began to go down. Thomas did not interrupt, did not utter a single word until he was sure James was finished. He wept, for James, his experiences, what the world had done to them… and for Miranda.

Miranda who died suddenly and raging, Miranda his wife and his best friend for so many years.

He held James after, neither absolving nor condemning him, simply accepting that what had happened had happened. They had to move forward. This time, they could go together. He kissed James softly and took him to bed, lay with him until dawn broke and the light seemed to baptise them both. James was starved for touch and moaned, gasped, shook whenever Thomas’ hands or lips met his skin. Thomas felt the same; he was crying as he lay atop James, tears streaming down his cheeks as James grasped his back and begged to kiss him. Orgasm, when it came, came like a breeze of cool air on a hot summer’s night. It washed over them and left them with gooseflesh and shaking limbs.

He would tell James his own tale another day.

When they left the plantation, the prison in all but name, Thomas felt happiness fill him to the brim. The road was stretched out before them and Thomas knew in his bones they would find something at the end of it, something good.

He was right.

A house, small and cheap, it’s wood warped in places and a family of mice living under the floor, but it was a place they could call home. With the money they had taken with them from the plantation they bought a bed, some blankets and food. With time and effort they made a home on the edge of Savannah and lived in peace.

For two years, at least.

When winter came Thomas’ mood dropped as it always did. A mixture of being a lover of sunshine and bad memories brought up by cold weather. He spent most winters by the fire, his feet tucked under him, his nose stuck in a book to keep his mind at bay. James would join him when frosts stopped him tilling the soil outside.

That particular winter was bitter and James had hurt himself trying to fix the roof. Thomas, in an effort to prove he could still endure the cold, had gone out to try and patch the leak himself. Not long into the task he heard the sounds of a horse coming up the road. A single horse and a single rider, bundled in blankets and carrying very little. Whoever it was they weren’t expecting to stay, Thomas was glad to see. He descended the ladder and dusted the dirt from his hands.

“Ho there,” he called, “what may I-”

He stopped mid sentence as the man got off his horse, swinging the one whole leg over and deftly hitting the floor, crutch following moments after.

Despite the cold Thomas found his blood running hot. A fury he had not felt since the day his father had locked him away filled his body. His hands clenched into fists and he felt the nails digging into his palms with sharp stings of pain.

“Get the fuck off of this property,” he hissed.

John Silver winced, his pretty face scrunching in pain. “I’m not here to cause trouble. Is he here?”

“You can’t see him.”

He saw Silver sigh and rub his temple as if frustrated. “And why is that?”

“You know why,” he responded, “now I’ll only say this once more; get the fuck off of this property. I know who you are, John Silver,” he spoke the name as though it were a curse, a poison to be spat out before it caused pain, “I know what you’ve done. I won’t hesitate to hurt you, despite how James may or may not feel about you.”

“From what I know of you, you wouldn’t hurt a fly, let alone a crippled pirate,” Silver retorted with a crooked smirk.

Thomas stepped forward, towering over him and grasping his shoulder in a far too tight grip. “Do not presume to know me, sir; I have done things, endured things, you could not imagine, in defence of only myself. What do you imagine me capable of in defence of that man in there?”

Silver paled. Thomas saw him swallow, saw the cogs in his head turning as he took in Thomas’ words.

“I just- I want to see him, need to see him,” Silver said after a moment. He looked wretched; his brow furrowed, skin lined with wrinkles from years at sea, and that terrible look of a man in mourning for what could have been. “Nothing more than that.”

“Do you honestly expect I would let you in?” He asked as sincerely as he could.

“Has he made me out to be such a monster that even you, the man who would pardon pirates, would despise me?”

Thomas took a deep breath and shook his head. “He has not. James said you had your reasons. He has defended your actions, or some of them. I have come to my own conclusion that you don’t deserve his forgiveness, nor my own. You certainly don’t deserve my thanks.”

“What did I do to you?” Silver growled under his breath, teeth bared. “It was me that brought him to you, I am the one who made this-” he gestured to the house behind them “-possible! I saved him from death, from desperation and despair and mutiny. Without me-”

“You think that is important? You think James would rather suffer incarceration for simply being alive than die for his beliefs? You honestly- you honestly believe that either of us would prefer to live in a world that abhors our very existence than die to change it?” He laughed, a broken and bitter thing that made Silver step back in shock. Thomas supposed his madness was showing on his face. “You are wrong. I may not condone all of James’ actions over these past years, but I understand them. I understand his war and I would carry it on with him if he asked. That war is more than just gold and glory; it is a war against the systematic rot that fills the world. Men, women, children have fallen victim to that rot and you-” he poked a finger into the hard bone of Silver’s shoulder, “- have no right to take that from the people it affects.”

When he finished speaking his whole body was shaking. He wanted to scream, to kick this man to the ground for breaking James’ heart, he wanted to beat Silver until his breath stopped as he had to the man in Bethlam all those years ago.

“He has something I need,” Silver whispered after a moment.

Thomas shuddered and grabbed the man’s collar. “That’s why you’re here! Not to get forgiveness, not to see the man who’s heart you broke, not to find some semblance of redemption but to gain something! Tell me, is it your map? The map that leads to untold riches?”

“You don’t understand-”

“No!” He shouted, shaking Silver and pushing him away. “No, I don’t! And I don’t care to. So you will leave this place empty handed and with an empty heart, as you arrived, and you will do so quickly or I will not be responsible for my actions.”

“Thomas?”

A voice came from behind him. James stood at the open door, his damaged arm cradled against his chest. Thomas saw the moment he understood what was happening, saw the blood drain from his face and the pain move over his expression like a wave. He only said one word; a single syllable, “go”, whispered in a harsh and pained tone that made Thomas ache.

“James, I-” Silver reached for him with a shaking hand.

“Go,” James said again, voice thick with emotion. He shut the door behind him. Thomas gave Silver one last condemning look and turned, his body thrumming with anger and hatred as he went back to his home. He left Silver stood in the cold as snow started to fall from the sky. He didn’t look back as he heard the sound of hoofbeats moving off into the distance.

James wept against him that night. He shook and cried out, no doubt nearly drowning in memories. Thomas held him through it, as James had done for him so many times since they had come back together.

He didn’t talk about Silver for another week and Thomas was glad.