#having duo penises

[sea-lanterns]

Hi, how are ya my favorite delusional lesbean.

Now speaking of Shark Furina...Trivia!

Dyk that sharks essentially have two penises- yes! And they're called claspers. (Cause they latch on the female during mating) They're located on their pelvic fins, so they look like normal fins but with a twist

I’m actually pan but I am very much delusional when it comes to fictional women. You got that right, anon 😅

Anywho, Shark! Furina would fit in the Dragon AU with her duo penises lmao. And they’re FREAKY with the clasping mechanism and shape too, I just know that the Vet will have a hard time walking upright since I know Shark! Furina is very needy when it is mating time for sharks. Like how canines have knots and felines have spiny barbs on their cocks, Furina’s duo penises allow her to keep you tangled against her for a long time, unable to leave until Furina is thoroughly satisfied with the mating process and ensuring you are well satiated.

I also imagine Furina uses her special “claspers” to keep you close for cuddles. It doesn’t necessarily have to be used for mating, she just uses them to latch into you and make you stay with her a bit longer 🥺. It’s not often that you get into the water with her, so she has to make the most of your time.

[oletus-writer]

Can I have Luchino (hunter), Wu, and Antonio with a s/o that’ll make the most wild dirty jokes and laugh their ass off about it? But if anything even slightly dirty actual happens they’ll get red in the face and look away or cover their eyes. They’re just like “THIS IS INAPPROPRIATE I REFUSE TO LOOK”

Sorry that this took a while - I’ve been getting a lot of requests, surprisingly. (Also I have written things I never thought I’d write. The nsfw keigan alphabet was nothing, but this? Not exactly a challenge but I had a lot of fun.)

Luchino (hunter), Wu Chang, Antonio x reader who makes inappropriate jokes but is actually shy

Warnings: nsfw themes

Luchino (hunter)

When he first met you, you had asked him how his penis worked, which surprised and amused him. I mean, it was nice not to have another shocked person, asking how it happened, but why the question?

‘Well… I have a hemipenis, which is the practical term for two penises, inverted inside my cloaca. A cloaca is a hole where animals use to urinate, defecate, and have sex with. This is common in reptiles, and, since I am half a lizard, it would make sense for me to - hang on. That’s not how you properly greet people, is it?’

Soon, Luchino got used to your jokes and even began to look forward to hearing them - it’s not everyday when someone cracks such crude jokes in the manor, let alone to a human lizard hybrid.

When the two of you started dating, he was hesitant to make any sexual advances in fear of you rejecting him because of his situation. However, when he did, your bashfulness first of all surprised him, then brought out a playful side to him.

‘Amore mio, what’s this? You’re shy? How cute. You’d be even cuter being pounded by me, no?’

Xie Bi’an

As the only person on the list that would feel slightly embarrassed to have heard those jokes, Bi’an hides it well. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t find it funny - you’ll hear some breathy laughter from the man.

‘You have quite the mind. Do you stay up late and think of these jokes?’

In a duo hunters match together, he was surprised when he began unbuttoning his shirt because of the heat and you turned red as a tomato. What were you embarrassed about? He was under the impression that you could not care less if he stood naked in front of you.

‘You’re quite red, do you have a fever? No? Then why are you blushing so much? Ah… if that’s the case, I shall button up.’

It doesn’t come as much of a problem when the two of you are dating, since Bi’an likes to take it slow and is more romantic than horny. However, when the time comes, he hopes you won’t be too shy.

Fan Wujiu

When you made your first joke, he was one of the people who audibly laughed - sometimes, he’d make similar jokes just to see Bi’an flustered.

‘Heh. You and I will get along, I think.’

He’s going to flirt at you, as a joke at first, and then, it kind of clicked. Wujiu liked you more than a toy, liked seeing your embarrassed expressions, but there was a pang of hurt when you began to avoid him.

‘You’re avoiding me? Come on, I’ll tease you less.’

After this, he was a bit avoidant - he stopped his touches and lessened his teasing remarks. Perhaps this absence made you reconsider your feelings towards the man?

Antonio

Finally there’s someone to match with his dirty brain. An unstoppable duo, the two of you are, a power couple. So it came no surprise when the announcement came that the two of you were official.

Romance with Antonio was a whirlwind, but a problem soon arose - you were too shy to have sex. When he discovered this, he too teased you relentlessly.

‘Why are you suddenly acting like this, songbird? You had no problem with traumatising Joseph, but won’t even look at my tits? They’re good tits, too, for a cadaver.’

Teasing remarks aside, he’ll do his best to be supportive, and would encourage some casual intimacy, such as touching your waist, sleeping in the same bed, etc. For you, he’ll take it as slow as you’d like, even though he’s itching to get a move on. Suppose that’s what masturbation is for.

‘Passero, would you like to sleep in my bed tonight? It feels awfully lonely without you. No pressure, though.’

[thisweekingundamwing]

This Week in Gundam Wing July 28 - 3 August 2024

Here’s the roundup for July 28 - August 3, 2024!

Remember to give your content creators some love! Be sure to join in on the events at the bottom! And remember to send in any new works you see or make this next week!

~Mod Hel

Fanfiction/Ideas/Snippets:

@janaverse

Always https://janaverse.tumblr.com/post/757495143041531904/always-despite-being-good-at-so-many-things-duos

Heero Yuy/Duo Maxwell

Despite being good at so many things, Duo’s mouth was meant to be kissed.

@oncefutureking

Nudes are a Love Language https://archiveofourown.org/works/56952100

F/M, M/M, Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy, Trowa Barton/Quatre Raberba Winner

Heero Yuy, Relena Peacecraft, Duo Maxwell, Quatre Raberba Winner, Trowa Barton, Zechs Merquise

Mature, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Penises, Dick Pics, Humor, Character Study, 1xR, 3x4, Established Relationship, Long-Distance Relationship, Business Trip, Banter, Post-Canon, English

During a business trip, Heero is talked into sending intimate pictures to Relena, even though politicians rarely hold their own phones at all times.

Arts/Crafts/Photo Manips:

@bwooomscratches

https://www.tumblr.com/bwooomscratches/757583507604324352/in-the-middle-of-watching-gundam-wing

Random drawings of our beloved characters, fanart

@desertrose7591

https://www.tumblr.com/desertrose7591/757245660600893440

Lady Une, Treize Khushrenada, art from twitter

@ikuzeminna

https://www.tumblr.com/ikuzeminna/757830087393591296/i-finally-got-around-to-building-my-birthday

Leo, gunpla

@subtestsays

https://subtextsays.tumblr.com/post/757037489429102592

Have a transparent bubble bath-less Treize Khushrenada, for all your edit needs.

Photosets/Gifsets/Screenshots/Manga Pages:

@astragifs

https://www.tumblr.com/astragifs/757304743013089280

Heero Yuy, Trowa Barton, Duo Maxwell, Endless Waltz punch gifset

https://www.tumblr.com/astragifs/757485960032321536

WuFei Chang, Heero Yuy, Endless Waltz fight gifset

@janaverse

https://janaverse.tumblr.com/post/757577633359937536/im-in-heero-mode-again-9-of

Heero Yuy, Sims, screenshot

Calendar Events:

Gundam Wing AU Fest

https://www.tumblr.com/janaverse/755108738617245696/yay

All info about the event is in the post!

@gwcocktailfriday

Cocktail Fridays!

Post responses on Friday, during Happy Hour between 3 & 5 pm in your own timezone.

Here’s the prompts for Friday, August 9th: https://gwcocktailfriday.tumblr.com/post/757791721704783872/cocktail-friday-post-responses-on-friday-august

In need of prompts!

@thisweekingundamevents

Events Calendar https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/730188053636841472/updated-events-calendar

If you are hosting an event currently, or are planning on one, hit us up with links and dates! We’ll add them to the Calendar and reblog your notices to get the word out!

Needs to be updated...

[justanother-fan-girl]

Frantic Fanfic

TITLE: Mi AMor FEATURING THE CHARACTERS: y/n, duolingo bird WRITERS: starship, orthworm, skelly RATED 18+ Duo the owl sat besides you, in his bird house. The air was crisp with autumn, and as you were watering your plants, an alarm went off on your phone.

"Save your Duolingo Streak!"

Duo looked over your shoulder and saw the notification.

"Y/n, are you going to miss your Spanish lesson?", He said, his eyes showing a hint of bloodlust.

"No it's ok I've just had a busy say" you say in a haste.

"You know what would happen if you lose your streak" the owl said threateningly.

You shrink, horrified about your fate.

the bird looked into your eyes with its deformed face after you have not been keeping up with your lessons im going to say things to you duolingo does not teach if you dont continue our streak, YN

thats when it hit me. I want to fuck this bird.

according to the internet the duolingo bird is 3.5cm tall, so most penises can outsize the bird, would it destroy the organs?

i just want to lift the bird and smash it just imagine the face it makes as i grab it's wings and pin it to the wall

as it reaches the climax would it say "3 day streak!!!" as it cums or would it make a completely different sound

as i sex it would the bird moan in english or spanish

I stare into dou's eyes. I want to learn a new language… The language of love. Dou: "Uhmmm…. do you mean french y/n.

Me: don't play dumb duo. Ill give you some privacy to change. As you head into the bathroom you start stroking your massive black cock.

You head outside and see duo bent over on the table with his pantys off. You pull out your cock ( a second time) and stick it in his green ass.

Fanfic created with #FranticFanfic.

[casitafallz]

Stray Dolores: What do we do if we have to pee?

Watcher Camilo: You broke protocol because you needed a bathroom break?

Stray Dolores: It was a really long trip and everyone is nervous.

Watcher Camilo : bottom of the blue chest, you can use that

*the duo opens to see a empty, 500ML water bottle, under some equiptment.*

Stray Dolores: Not the water bottle!

Watcher Camilo: That's the one.

Decay Isabela, holding up the water bottle distastefully: Did you never learn that boy-parts and girl-parts are different and that our parts aren't penises!

*Watcher Camilo hangs up*

[leopoldainter]

For a while people thought I was giving away penises.

It wasn't too bad because it was just the thoughts they had

So see динартоы надо сайте Ольга найти ad work bench for MOLDS AND MOLLY'S ittriedTOkillthe .pane

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SOME BITCH BLEW OUT THE DAMN INDENT

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Το αφεντικό του διακομιστή ρομπότ είναι εδώ για να σας πει ότι χρειάζεστε νέα σοκ

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My apologies google is just full of lies that just don't fly for me

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No bathrooms on Wednesday because of the BBQ.

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HaunfffT 5ed.6grammaticale. Tour7dehors7SETH δηνάριο ήταν & commodore TNT

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揺りかご 素屋根今朝 得ろんグ 揺籃！

Bingo 2. A second call. Brinx

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[meret118]

Serotine bats are the first mammals known to mate without penetration, new research suggests.

. . .

Male serotine bats have long penises with bulbous heads. When erect, their penises measure roughly 0.6 inches (1.6 centimeters) long, which represents more than one-fifth of their 2.7-inch (7-centimeter) body length.But perhaps more importantly, their penises are too big for penetrative mating. Their erect members are more than seven times longer than the length of a female serotine bat’s vagina. The wide, heart-shaped heads, meanwhile, are also seven times wider than a female’s vaginal opening.

. . .

What the scientists saw when they watched the footage surprised them. Male bats used their abnormally large penises like an extra arm to move the females’ tail membranes out of the way. Then, the male pressed its penis head against the female’s vulva. For half of the observed bat pairings, this lasted for less than 53 minutes, but one duo persisted for nearly 13 hours. Afterward, the females’ abdomens appeared to be wet, which the scientists suspect indicates the presence of semen—but they don’t know for sure.

[noheero]

Electric Sucking Sex Doll by BestRealDoll review

Buying a Male Sex Stroker

A male sex stroker is an innovative self-pleasure toy that can help you satisfy cravings, get into sex mode or even prepare for intercourse. These devices feature sleek designs and discreet travel locks. They’re hygienic, easy to clean and come with intuitive programming and skin-safe materials.

Best Sex Toys For Men

Masturbation is an incredibly normal part of sexual pleasure. But if it becomes too frequent or takes over your life, you may want to discuss it with a counselor or therapist.

The good news is, most people who masturbate are healthy and enjoy the experience. But some people find it hard to get off, and they may need a little extra guidance and support to feel comfortable.

You should always use lube and be sure to follow manufacturer instructions. If you don’t follow instructions, it could make the experience less pleasurable and increase your risk of infection.

There are many different types of sex toys for men, including jack off machines and blowjob toys, fleshlights and male strokers. The key is to determine your specific needs and preferences before making any purchases.

To pick the right male sex stroker, think about what you want to feel from it, Dr. Lehmiller says. Are you seeking a blow job-like feeling, or do you want something more intense like vibration or texture?

Also consider how often you masturbate, as this can affect your mood and libido. Some men masturbate once a day, while others go for a longer or shorter period of time.

For most people, one session of masturbation is all that’s needed to achieve a satisfying orgasm, but some men need more than that. If you have an urge for more than once a day, try to set aside a special time to do it.

Some sex toys are designed for hands-free use and are ideal for couples play, but you can also enjoy them solo if you’re more tolerant of discomfort. The Fleshlight Quickshot Vantage, for example, has duo-openings on each side of its shaft, so you can fuck from either end.

Another great option is a penis sleeve, which slides onto the head of your penis and stimulates the frenulum, according to Azmi. It can be adjusted to fit a variety of sizes and penises, she says. This helps to reduce the pressure on your penis, which can help you get aroused more easily.

Top Male Masturbators

There are plenty of options to choose from when it comes to male sex products, so picking the perfect one for you can be tricky. The top models are a mix of powerful air suction and a sophisticated design that delivers an intense orgasm.

The X-factor in a male sex stroker is air pressure, which experts say is the closest thing to a female orgasm. This is achieved by using a structured Quick Clean Helix silicone inner sleeve, which allows natural air suction to be released through a clever design.

A great choice for anyone who wants a powerful and realistic orgasm, the Arcwave Head Honcho is the most orgasmic male sex toy we’ve ever tested. It features a wide entrance and a tight internal sleeve that encloses the head of your penis and pushes it over the edge, as well as three rings with raised nodules in them that massage your penis and add more sensation.

from Male stroker https://malestroker.com/electric-sucking-sex-doll-by-bestrealdoll-review/

[erinwalker136]

Electric Sucking Sex Doll by BestRealDoll review

Buying a Male Sex Stroker

A male sex stroker is an innovative self-pleasure toy that can help you satisfy cravings, get into sex mode or even prepare for intercourse. These devices feature sleek designs and discreet travel locks. They’re hygienic, easy to clean and come with intuitive programming and skin-safe materials.

Best Sex Toys For Men

Masturbation is an incredibly normal part of sexual pleasure. But if it becomes too frequent or takes over your life, you may want to discuss it with a counselor or therapist.

The good news is, most people who masturbate are healthy and enjoy the experience. But some people find it hard to get off, and they may need a little extra guidance and support to feel comfortable.

You should always use lube and be sure to follow manufacturer instructions. If you don’t follow instructions, it could make the experience less pleasurable and increase your risk of infection.

There are many different types of sex toys for men, including jack off machines and blowjob toys, fleshlights and male strokers. The key is to determine your specific needs and preferences before making any purchases.

To pick the right male sex stroker, think about what you want to feel from it, Dr. Lehmiller says. Are you seeking a blow job-like feeling, or do you want something more intense like vibration or texture?

Also consider how often you masturbate, as this can affect your mood and libido. Some men masturbate once a day, while others go for a longer or shorter period of time.

For most people, one session of masturbation is all that’s needed to achieve a satisfying orgasm, but some men need more than that. If you have an urge for more than once a day, try to set aside a special time to do it.

Some sex toys are designed for hands-free use and are ideal for couples play, but you can also enjoy them solo if you’re more tolerant of discomfort. The Fleshlight Quickshot Vantage, for example, has duo-openings on each side of its shaft, so you can fuck from either end.

Another great option is a penis sleeve, which slides onto the head of your penis and stimulates the frenulum, according to Azmi. It can be adjusted to fit a variety of sizes and penises, she says. This helps to reduce the pressure on your penis, which can help you get aroused more easily.

Top Male Masturbators

There are plenty of options to choose from when it comes to male sex products, so picking the perfect one for you can be tricky. The top models are a mix of powerful air suction and a sophisticated design that delivers an intense orgasm.

The X-factor in a male sex stroker is air pressure, which experts say is the closest thing to a female orgasm. This is achieved by using a structured Quick Clean Helix silicone inner sleeve, which allows natural air suction to be released through a clever design.

A great choice for anyone who wants a powerful and realistic orgasm, the Arcwave Head Honcho is the most orgasmic male sex toy we’ve ever tested. It features a wide entrance and a tight internal sleeve that encloses the head of your penis and pushes it over the edge, as well as three rings with raised nodules in them that massage your penis and add more sensation.

from Male stroker https://malestroker.com/electric-sucking-sex-doll-by-bestrealdoll-review/

[rawiswhore]

Triple H, Davey Boy Smith, Brian Pillman x Fem Reader- "Serve the Servant"

British professional wrestler Davey Boy Smith got his start in the World Wrestling Federation in a British tagteam duo known as the British Bulldogs.

When Davey Boy Smith had a solo wrestling career in the 1990's, Davey's nickname was the British Bulldog and he often kept that nickname.

A term for a female dog is a bitch.

Not only does the word "bitch" mean female dog (as in canine), being someone's bitch is when someone is submissive to someone more dominant, as in someone who is forced to do something for another.

Near the beginning of the fall of 1997, there was a storyline in the World Wrestling Federation where after Brian Pillman won a match against Goldust, Brian stole Goldust's wife/valet Terri Runnels/Marlena and used her as his own personal sex slave.

At the end of August 1998, Triple H cut a wrestling promo at the Rock, threatening he was going to make the Rock his bitch.

Because of Davey Boy Smith's nickname being the British Bulldog, Brian Pillman's storyline of making Marlena/Terri Runnels is sex slave, and Triple H boasting he'll make the Rock his bitch, you shared an idea you had with Davey, Brian and Triple H.

Just imagine if Brian Pillman was still alive in 1998 and if Davey Boy Smith was still in the WWF during that year.

Granted, Davey didn't really fit in with the WWF's Attitude era, and during the Attitude era Davey wasn't really all that over and welcomed back...

In September 1998, shortly after Triple H cut that wrestling promo at the Rock, you were inside a hotel room with Davey, Triple H and Brian.

Triple H had his long blond hair hanging down when he was inside this hotel room with you.

You were standing stark naked in front of Brian, Davey and Triple H, but you wore a collar around your neck with the word "slut" written on the collar's tag.

The collar you wore had 3 leashes attached to it, and those leashes were held in one of the hands of Davey, Brian and Triple H.

Brian, Davey and Triple H all had their shorts and underwear pulled down to their ankles, where their penises and scrotums were exposed out in front of you.

Brian had his signature wicked shiteating grin plastered on his face as he looked at you, whereas Brian's other hand was behind your head and cradling it, his fingers laced and buried into your hair.

Brian's penis was growing harder from looking at you as well as from you standing so near to him.

Even though you are consenting to what Brian, Triple H and Davey Boy Smith will do to you, your face looked concerned and worried in what was about to happen.

But don't worry, Brian and those other 2 weren't going to rape you.

Davey and Triple H, meanwhile, stood by you with smirks on their faces.

With his classic sharklike grin on his face, Brian pulled your head down to his crotch by gently yanking your hair down lower towards the floor, where you crouched down to the floor lower and lower until you were squatting near the floor and your face was near his genitals.

While you were now on your knees, Brian forced you into sucking his penis for him, and he ordered you to do it for him.

You listened to him, where you opened your mouth and your face and head leaned further down to his crotch until his cock was entering inside your mouth.

Brian was very satisfied in seeing you with his dick in your mouth.

Now that you had his erection in your mouth, you obeyed and listened to Brian and began sucking his penis, your head bobbing up and down the shaft of his boner as you sucked it.

Brian could easily shove your head back and forth on his cock, in fact, he may as well do that.

And so he helped push your head back and forth on his penis while you sucked it.

As Brian did this to your head, he looked at you still with his evil, wicked, ear-to-ear shiteating grin.

Brian can easily make one of his hands crotch chop and tell you to "suck it!" a la D Generation X

While the collar you're wearing reads "slut", you wish your collar would also read "whore" as well.

Maybe you can even have that word written on your head.

Having Brian's dick in your mouth isn't making you gag and you aren't choking on his penis.

His cock doesn't really smell and taste bad.

"Rub my balls as you're sucking me off" Brian ordered you to do.

One of your hands grabbed his scrotum, where your hand began to massage his nuts and rub them.

Triple H and Davey Boy Smith, meanwhile, haven't really done anything to you so far.

During your blowjob to Brian, some of his precum is falling out of his slit and getting inside your mouth, where you're swallowing it.

You always swallow.

Brian can hear you swallowing his premature ejaculation, and that really makes him happy.

"Good girl" he purred with a grin on his face.

Triple H and Davey are getting erections from you, both of their penises rising upwards and growing harder.

Despite that you're busy sucking off Brian Pillman, he wants to cum inside you.

"Hey y/n" Triple H said to you, which made your eyes wander and look at him. "Suck it!"

When Triple H said "suck it!", his hands made a chopping motion and a "v" shape near his crotch and he thrust his crotch out while shouting that vulgar catchphrase.

Should you suck it for him?

Right now you're busy sucking someone else right now.

But then again, considering you're 3 men's bitch now...

"Listen to me!" Triple H ordered.

So, you pulled your head away from Brian's penis, and Pillman actually let you go and suck on Triple H's cock this time, Brian removing his hand off of your head.

You listened to Triple H, where you leaned your head further down Triple H's crotch until his penis was inside your mouth this time, where you proceeded and began to suck his dick.

While you sucked on Triple H's erection, your eyes looked up at his face, where he looked at you with this naughty grin on his face.

What can Davey Boy Smith do this time?

Triple H was satisfied seeing you suck on his cock like that, murmuring how good you are at sucking him.

Like Brian, Triple H placed his hand on top of your head, where he buried his thick, huge fingers into your hair.

Triple H began to shove your head back and forth on his erection, forcing you to suck his penis.

But you were consenting to it.

Again, you weren't choking on his cock.

Sucking on his dick more and more led to precum spilling out of his slit, where you swallowed the precum falling out of his slit.

"Damn, I wanna fuck her so hard right now" Brian Pillman said about you.

"Me too" Triple H and Davey Boy Smith agreed, not saying that in unison.

Because Triple H wanted to cum inside your pussy, he pulled you up from his cock by yanking you up by holding onto your hair, where you pulled up from the floor.

Later on, Davey Boy Smith sat on one of the beds in the hotel room, where he made you sit on his lap.

When you sat on his lap, Davey began to fuck your asshole with his erection, pounding and ramming his cock up your ass.

He also held your hips as he fucked your ass, making you bounce and ride up and down his dick.

Triple H, meanwhile, shoved his dick into your pussy, where he began to thrust and jam his erection inside your moist vagina.

Triple H stood in front of you and he placed his hands on your thighs, where he spread your thighs and legs wide open.

Once your legs were spread out, Triple H removed one of his hands off of your thigh and placed it on his erection, where he directed and pointed the tip of his dick to your vaginal hole.

He then slid and entered his cock more and more inside of your vagina, removing his hand off of his dick as it slid inside you more and more.

He then began to fuck and pound your twat, ramming his penis back and forth inside.

Having 2 penises getting shoved in your ass and pussy made the bed creak and squeak.

As for Brian, Brian joined in on this threesome, about to become a foursome, where as Brian still kept his wicked grin on his face, he sat down right next to you on his knees, where he held his penis in his hand and forced you to suck on it, ordering you to suck his cock.

One of his hands grabbed the back of your head and pulled your head down to his crotch, where you bent down sideways and proceeded to try to suck his penis while being fucked.

Did it work?

Somewhat.

When Triple H jizzed, after he pulled out of you, he forced you to suck his cock and swallow his cum, which you did.

When Brian ejaculated inside of you, he ordered you to suck his cock and swallow his semen.

Like the good girl you are, you did it for him.

[onlyseokmins]

Been thinking about sucking the life out of seungkwan 😩

Omg bestie me too me tooooo he looks SO GOOD kfkdkkdlsosos if you're not thinking abt sucking Mr boo seungkwan then what's the point??.? Been thinking abt it sm had to write smth abt it 😔 sorry it's not v sexci I was too busy giggling abt how much I wrote abt boo dick at work 💀

Best friends occasionally see each other naked, right? But most best friend dynamics do not include one half of the duo having a raging crush on the other. The two of you aren’t “normal” besties — absolutely cannot be.

Because what kind of best friends end up in this kind of situation? Both of you stare open-mouthed at Seungkwan’s dick that he’d impulsively pulled out just to prove his point.

You should be laughing. You honestly really wish you could.

If you were entirely, completely, and utterly his regular old best friend of twenty-some years, you would be able to laugh it off. Joke around a bit. Poke some fun at how he stupidly whipped his dick out because of your claims of disgust about the portrayal of penises in porn.

But you’re dumb and so much in love with the man that lives rent-free in your mind even though you interact with him almost every hour of the day. And his dick is out. Right in front of you. So, you freeze, eyes glued to it.

Seungkwan thought you would be laughing as well, or maybe even cussing him out. Unaware of your inner turmoil, he’s now mentally slapping himself for not thinking things through when he's fired up. Stiff as a board (willing himself to not grow stiffer elsewhere with your gaze locked on him) and you almost moan aloud when his fingers twitch because they are the most gorgeous you’ve ever seen — of course, he’d have to have a pretty dick as well. And so, you take back everything you said before about ugly penises.

His is curved just right, not too big or too small. Long enough to certainly make your toes curl and you figure he’d still be able to stretch you perfectly for a pleasurable burn. You shift slightly in your seated position on his bed as you lick your lips.

The creak of his bedframe and rustle of his sheets is a crash back to reality for Seungkwan, a tiny gasp leaving his pillowy lips. He scrambles to pull up the waistband of his gray sweatpants but you’re faster, laying a hand on his hip and halting his movements. It causes his almost-covered length to hit against the back of your hand and while he lets out a hiss, you finally ask the question you’ve been dying to ask.

“Can I suck you off?”

“… What?!” He gapes at you. “Why? I thought you hated what penises looked like?”

“I have my complaints, yes… but yours,” you lean a bit closer and Seungkwan bites his lip at how glazed over your eyes are, “I could suck on forever.”

“What the fuck is happening?”

“Look, I have a very serious case of dickitus right now.”

“Dick-what-is?”

“We can act like this never happened and move on but you’re going to have to understand that I might need some time apart because I won’t be able to stop thinking about your dick for a while.”

His mouth opens and closes. “I’m… sorry?”

“You should be,” you point your other finger accusingly at him suddenly, “you should’ve had an ugly dick so I can have a reason to like you less!”

“I — wait. You like me? Like as in like-like? You like m — ”

“Yes, you idiot, I’m in love with you! All your nagging, our goofy fights, how you take care of me, how you make me laugh, and now your stupid dick!”

He cups the side of his head and lets out an embarrassed giggle when he sees your eyes tear up. “Are you crying because you admitted you love me or because of my dick?”

“Both? But honestly, I’d prefer to be crying solely because of your dick, yes.”

A delicate finger grazes your cheek to brush away a fallen eyelash. “But I’m not even inside you yet?”

“Boo Seungkwan!” you exclaim. “Is that how you respond to a confession? No wonder you’re single!”

“I don’t think that’s how normal people confess but I stand corrected. I’m only in your heart right now, as you are in mine. But I also wouldn’t mind being inside you in other ways.”

You gasp, amusingly half-scandalized as he gestures to your lower body before he pulls you close for a rather chaste kiss. He smiles against your lips when you tell him you two aren’t normal and he relays to you that this moment is something he’s always dreamed of, how much he likes you, and it’s all fireworks and magic between two idiots.

But of course, you make a point of giving Seungkwan the best head ever because you weren’t lying — you could really suck on him forever and as you soak up every single one of his moans, who could really blame you?

[sleepyamaya]

JJK characters as FGO servants…

Author notes: it’s almost 4 am and I didn’t proofread. I hope you guys enjoyed this. I haven’t posted anything like this in years. >.< Time jumps back and forth here and I tried to make the master gender neutral. Will probably edit in the future. 

Edit: @chaoticending and @sisterkosho I forgot to tag you two in this until later in the afternoon when I was running errands. It's not the Yuuji centric one I mentioned before but I hope this imagine suffice!

/--/

Yuuji:

Alter-Ego – The first sorcerer to join Chaldea. Sukuna’s with him too(much to the teen’s dismay). Gets along with almost everyone but has the best relationship with the kitchen staff servants and kid servants.

He freaked out when he first met Emiya(same VA to Sukuna), but after a few days, he warmed up to the older servant as they bonded through cooking(food wars, anyone?). Shares recipes with Tamamo and Cat.

Of the four sorcerers, he helps out their master most often. Even offers to teach them self-defense.

(‘I know it won’t be good against a servant, but if you were to fight a human in the singularities, it’s better safe than sorry.’ )

His relationship with Sukuna is better. They accepted the fact they’re going to be roommates forever, so they might as well make the best of it(still occasionally argue, but hey, no relationship is perfect). Amakusa and Jeanne offered to exorcise Sukuna but the two declined politely (well, Yuuji was polite about it while Sukuna’s eye and mouth appear on the teen’s cheek and cursed the two Rulers out. Master could hear the King of Curses’ voice from the other end of the building).

Gojo:

Caster – He would start shit with other gods/divine servants to prove he’s the strongest servant (‘Kami-sama, give me mercy and a lot of patience’). Master has to use multiple command spells to get everybody to stop the fight and ordered Gojo a time out (Command seals are too op. Sukuna learned that the hard way too before Gojo arrived). He almost succeeded in goading Gilgamesh in using Ea after all.

“NOBLE PHANTASMS ARE STRICTLY PROHIBITED INSIDE CHALDEA!”  

(Roman is so, so tired. Give the poor man a break, Gojo. The director is on his seventh cup of coffee today.)

Bugs the staff about the functions of each machine and may or may not have broken a device or two that’s worth several million dollars. Leaves post-it stickers of penises around the staff’s work stations.

He was salty when he found out he doesn’t qualify for the title of Grand Caster. The man-child whined for days. Master gave him some kikufuku to cheer him up.

 Megumi:

Caster – He’s annoyed he was summoned under the same class as Gojo. He died from old age and is even more annoyed he was summoned as a teen, but got over it when Yuuji greeted him. Sukuna alerted Yuuji of Megumi’s arrival and their reunion was bittersweet. Gojo ruined it by appearing behind the once moody teen and ruffled his porcupine hair like a child.

(“Now all we need is our master to summon Nobara and our reunion will be complete.”  

“Ah, but I’m out of quartz to summon.”

“Didn’t you hoarded like three hundred of them?” Yuuji asked.

“I just used them all to summon Megumi!” ) [Gacha is hell.]

Spends most of his time in the organization’s library or sparring with Yuuji and other servants in the simulation room.

Everybody loves his divine dogs. More often than not, staff and kid servants will bug him to summon them. They became the organization’s unofficial support dogs. He keeps Nobara and Yuuji out of trouble. His ‘troublesome duo’ senses are tingling whenever one of them is plotting something. Master is happy to know Megumi is the sensible one(until they found out he is just as insane as the other sorcerers).

Fou hates Megumi’s dogs. They’re stealing the small Beast’s spot light. Mashu comforts Fou when she sees the white floof pouting or glaring at the shikigamis.

 Nobara:

Archer– Hear me out, if Artoria can be an archer with a water gun, Nobara can be an Archer with her nails and hammer. She complained to her master why she was summoned as a teen and demanded to be resummoned to an older version of herself. ‘At least summon me in my twenties!’

“Kugisaki, you knocked our master out. You’re suffocating them,”’ Megumi calls out from the other side of the room.  Yuuji’s torn between hugging his classmate and helping their master.

More often than not, competes with other archers. Is a sore loser when she lost to David and Robin Hood.

Later she found out Da Vinci created Master’s mystic codes and quickly befriends the eccentric Caster to design new mystic codes for her master(and for herself). Master worries for the future state of their mystic codes. They pray Nobara doesn’t go overboard with the designs.

(Is surprised to see Oda Nobunaga is a woman and immediately declared her undying love to the other Archer.

‘What about Maki-senpai?” Yuuji asks.

"She is going to be devastated,” Megumi deadpans.  

“Let me have this moment!”)

[tobesobri]

Bust | Part One: Chisel (7.8k)

“Disappointed?” She tilted her head, smirking at him. She had no right to think he liked her better than Rose. She, herself, liked Rose better too. So she was sure he had to be at least a little bit sad to see Rose missing.

He smiled and the second she saw those dimples she was reminded of his Instagram all over again.

“A little,” he nodded, pinching his thumb and index finger together in the air and she painfully agreed.

“Well, you get me all by myself tonight.” She didn’t realize how it sounded until it was too late. Until she was cringing at all the sexual insinuations she’d just made for absolutely no reason. She could have said something else that wasn’t laced in an innuendo. But no, of course not. She had to continue her embarrassing streak when it came to Harry.

Instead of being creeped out by her, however, and pulling a confused and slightly terrified face, he laughed. And, on God, his laugh was the most amazing thing she’d ever heard. This wasn’t the first time the sound of his laughter graced her eardrums, but it was the first time he was laughing because of something she said that wasn’t about crooked penises.

“Lucky me.”

In which Y/N is an annoyance in Harry’s sculpting class.

story masterlist | my masterlist

It’s not her forte. Her hands don’t know how to hold onto things. They tremble under pressure. They mess things up no matter how hard she tries.

Not that she had really tried very hard to begin with.

Sculpting was just not something she saw herself doing. Ever. Not with her lack of agility and poor attention to detail. But to appease her whining best friend… she’d do just about anything.

The class was held in a little art studio with large windows for ventilation and tall ceilings to display the mass amounts of student artwork on butcher block shelves. She never thought she’d be back in a classroom type setting after graduating college, but here she was.

Learning, what she proclaimed as, a useless skill.

The studio was smack dab in the middle of an inclined street. Little quaint buildings that sat on an angle because why not pour foundations on a hill and make her weekly walks to the studio a little sweatier than she would have preferred. Even if it was winter in their little beach village town. Sweat still happened. It just happened underneath a scarf and a hand-knitted beanie from the sewing shop next door.

She could not deny, however, that the late afternoon classes every Wednesday and Saturday brought her way more joy than she’d anticipated. She looked forward to meeting up with Rose at the bottom-of-the-hill cafe, sharing the daily special with her before making their way up to the studio. It was calm in the middle and end of her hectic weeks that she most definitely needed.

What she didn’t need, however, what she most certainly did not look forward to, what she could have done without, what took her joy and smashed it against a wall was him.

The instructor.

Harry ‘I have nice hands and a misleading smile’ Styles.

It had only been two weeks into their classes and he had already told her one of her bowls was garbage. That the way she sculpted a face was terrifying. That she couldn’t draw for shit and that made her attempts at sculpting even worse.

So by Saturday of their second week, she didn't care anymore. He was a jerk and she would be the best pain in his ass she knew how to be.

While everyone called him Harry, like he’d asked them to the very first day, she called him Mr. Styles. Just to see the way his eyes rolled back into his head and his nostrils flared. While everyone asked him insightful questions, like what glaze was best to use or what tool sculpted eyes most efficiently, she asked him if she could use the bathroom.

She got a fucking kick out of irritating him. Knowing he went home after their classes just as irritated as she’d been. With clenched fists and a pounding headache.

It helped that he was insanely too attractive to be teaching a bunch of millennials about sculpting in his free time.

“You should really leave him alone, he might kick us out, you know,” Rose said on their first third week walk up Justice Hill. There was no justice in walking uphill, and most fucking certainly not in the humidity-ridden beachside town. She found the street name personally offensive.

“Oh fuck him. If he kicks us out, he’ll have to refund us.” Y/N did not, even for a second, bother to lower her voice as they neared the studio, knowing any one of the other students could hear her if they were to walk by.

“Refund us what? We got the class for free, remember?”

Y/N racked her brain like she’d completely forgotten that little detail before shrugging it off. “Whatever. He won’t kick us out.”

“How do you know for sure?”

Before she could make some stupid remark about how Harry secretly liked her pestering him or about how much he seemed much too impressed by Rose’s progress to ever get rid of them, the devil himself turned the corner in front of them.

He came out from an alleyway that connected the street to a tiny parking lot. And while they were going uphill, he was coming down. He was hard to miss and so were they, but still he attempted to not see them.

“What a prick,” Y/N mumbled under her breath as they got closer to each other. And almost as if he could read her lips, he rolled his eyes so fucking hard she thought maybe they’d finally pop right out of his head this time.

“Shush,” Rose warned as the three of them finally met in the middle, at the door to the studio that was decorated with a bright yellow ‘Open’ sign, children’s drawings, hand-painted hours of operation, and one too many polaroids of past students and their sculpting creations.

They all stood and stared at each other for a moment before he opened the door first, holding it as, to Y/N’s surprise, he let them go in first. And while she was still in shock at the gesture, his body language said it all. Like he was forcing himself to be nice to the dynamic duo, to the bane of his existence. While she was too distracted by Harry and his clay-stained trousers and cable-knit sweater with a cartoon deer embroidered on it, Rose walked into the studio first. Giving Harry a polite smile that he returned almost… genuinely.

And right when Y/N made a move to follow, Harry stepped in front of her. She jolted back as he just about let the door slam her in the face.

Today was going to be fantastic.

*                                              *                                 *

“Right, so,” Harry began, clapping his dry hands together as he took a seat behind his messy table at the front of the studio. “I know some of you haven’t finished your heads yet, but our focus today will still be on the bodies. We’ll have a catch up on Saturday to make up for it.”

Y/N sought out her head on the wall where she’d placed it last week beside Rose’s, realizing for the first time just how ugly it really was. And to think she’d been trying to sculpt Harry’s annoying face. Even more annoying that no matter what she did, he was always a lot more handsome than her hunk of polymer clay.

“... because, like I mentioned, we have special guests today who will be modeling for you.” Harry stood again while two very thin and very conventionally perfect people came out in white robes. Y/N couldn’t help but gag.

“This is Hope and Jordan.” Harry motioned as he introduced them, not getting any further in his instructions before Y/N raised her hand in the back of the class.

Rose attempted to get her to put it down, too, because Harry was clearly in the middle of something, but it didn’t really work out so well. Y/N was a stubborn son of a bitch.

“Yeah?” He pointed at her, sighing while planting his hands on his hips. He knew nothing she had to ask was going to be at all beneficial to the group.

She cleared her throat and just from the smirk on her face, he braced for impact. “Are they going to be modeling nude?”

She made just about everyone blush, except for Harry. He hated how she never took anything seriously. That the art he’d spent years perfecting enough to teach meant nothing to her. It was all just a primary school joke in her eyes.

“Yes, actually,” he answered bluntly and then returned to what he was going to say before Y/N’s interruption. “So I want everyone to get a piece of paper and while they’re modeling, do a rough sketch of what you might want the body of your sculpture to look like. The importance is to get the proportions down so that when you use the clay, you’ll know how much you’ll need for each part. Just like we did for the heads.”

Harry walked around the class once the models were stripped and the sketching began. Rose started immediately, concentration on her face as she flipped between the female model and her piece of sketchbook paper.

All Y/N had was a scratch piece of grey-toned mixed media paper she’d found laying on their table. And absolutely no clue where to even begin.

She stared at Harry instead of the naked models, watching as he helped others around the room, pointing at their sketches and where they could improve. His other hand behind his back that gave her perfect access to stare at his rings. Remembering how he’d taken them off guide their first few sculpting lessons. Remembering how his hands had so gently but so fucking firmly caressed the mound of clay into the exact shapes he wanted like he knew exactly what to do with those things.

“See it’s going just as I expected back here.” When his voice was at her ear, she jumped out of her skin and out of her daydreams. Twisting her head around to him as he stood behind her, she found him staring over her shoulder at her blank piece of paper.

She narrowed her eyes at him once she’d fully processed what he said. “Sorry I’m trying to figure out the best way to scale up that dude’s micro-cock, proportionally, if you don’t mind.”

He just about choked on his own spit, and rightfully so. But when he glanced to her eyes instead of her disappointing blank canvas, with his eyebrows furrowed and his cute little nostrils flared just the way she liked them, it was clear his reaction wasn’t for the reasons she’d intended.

He was quiet. Lips pursed, mind completely empty apart from hearing her say cock over and over again. Echoing against his skull. Making a home for itself in his hippocampus for later purposes. When he was not in a class full of students with their eyes on him, watching him get hard at the fucking way she said cock.

“Leave you to it then,” he cleared his throat and continued on.

“He may not kick us out, but killing you is still an option,” Rose whispered once Harry was a safe distance away from them.

Y/N leaned back in her seat to watch him walk down the rest of their row. His hands behind his back again, eyes wandering over shoulders.

As long as he had those rings on while he choked her out, she was okay with that.

*                                              *                                 *

Everyone had moved on to their bodies. Gathering the clay they needed from the front and using their sketches as guidelines to build around the pre-made wire and aluminum foil armature. Most everyone had some sort of a form being attached to the heads of their sculptures by the time Y/N even got started.

Because she decided on using Harry as reference after all and he would just not stand still.

With the models gone, they were on their own, with help from Harry of course. He played several videos and gave various demonstrations to aide them. It wasn’t supposed to be perfect, but after she gave it her all for about ten minutes, she was ready to give up. Her body looked like a very lumpy, very deformed version of Shrek.

She took a break again, watching Rose sculpt for a while instead. She watched Harry sometimes too as he walked around the class again in gloves this time. Smoothing out features and picking up tools to aid in the process of forming collarbones and wrinkles.

The studio was in its typical state of disarray. Random cups of milky water on every table, pieces of clay smushed into the tile floor, tools and used gloves strewn about with no rhyme or reason. Harry thrived in that kind of environment while Y/N well… she hated it.

She wanted organization and cleanliness. Her nine-to-five called for that kind of thing. But she was slowly getting used to it. To letting go and embracing the mess while she was here. She wasn’t the one that had to clean it all up anyways.

The only time she wasn’t daydreaming was when Harry started up their aisle again, walking in front of their table this time however. He helped a couple others at the end of their row, watched some of them work before eventually landing right in front of Rose’s station.

He cocked his head to the side while he watched her struggle to form an even pair of breasts on her headless lady. And even though Y/N was trying her best to look busy, she just couldn’t help it.

Rose handed her work in progress over to him with a frustrated huff after he offered his assistance. And like… no way was Y/N missing out on Mr. Harry fucking Styles fingering some clay into the perfect set of boobs. No way.

Especially fucking not when he removed his gloves and used those fingers in their bare glory the way she wished he’d use them someplace else. She watched while he slapped some more clay on Rose’s poor flat-chested model and proceeded to smooth it out with his expert fingertips. She watched the clay melt under his touch, watching him dip into their shared cup of water to aid the process. She looked away long enough to admire the concentration on his face, the way he bit down on his lip and furrowed his brows the way she was used to. She watched again while he fixed all of Rose’s mistakes just by gliding his thumbs over the two perfect little lumps on her sculpture that sure as hell hadn’t started out so perfectly.

She had no idea why Harry sculpting a tiny set of breasts on what would eventually become a mermaid got her so hot and bothered but… it did. It did so fucking much, she was almost salivating like a dog by the end of it, thinking about what his hands could do with the real deal. But then he handed it back to Rose with a content smile on his face and burst Y/N’s little bubble.

“Might be better,” he said softly and Rose nodded in agreement. She hadn't noticed before, but when he stood to his full height it was clear he’d been leaning over on their table. Closer to the both of them than he’d ever really been before. And she knew he was tall, taller than Rose, who was five foot seven inches herself. And not just that but his shoulders were broad and his arms were a humble amount of muscular. Almost like he was a sculptor that kneaded clay a hundred hours a week. Maybe that was why she was a soaking wet mess.

He stretched his gloves back onto his hands and glanced Y/N’s direction. Eyes going straight from her disaster of an art piece to her flushed face and back.

“Don’t even know where to start to fix yours up,” he commented while moving slightly to his right until he stood directly in front of Y/N this time.

She looked at her abomination, wondering if it would be her worst idea to push more of his buttons or not. But, she went for it anyways. Her lack of impulse control would definitely come back to bite her in the ass one day.

“It’s the penis. Still haven’t gotten that down yet.”

He nodded, amused rather than his previous reaction to her antics. “Can see that, yeah. He’s got a bit of a crooked willy there.” Harry poked at it with his index finger and she became hyper aware of his closeness this time while he leaned over her tabletop again. Because his hands were right there, almost touching her own. And they were big, bigger than she realized. She could see him perfectly through the transparent gloves, his long fingers with clipped nails at the end that were well taken care of, considering.

She would need to soak herself in holy water for a while after this.

“Oh, is that not what the male anatomy looks like?” She teased, not fully realizing they were getting along for the first time and it was because of dicks. Because she’d put an oddly shaped protrusion on her figure before she’d even done much else with the blob of clay stuck to her form.

“No,” he laughed, shaking his head at her and standing up straight again. “Maybe if you paid attention when the models were out here, you’d know that.”

“Maybe if you hired someone who’s cock I could actually see from all the way back here without a fucking magnifying glass.” She was only slightly aware of how fully immersed she was in the debate over this penis.

But all he heard was cock again. She really needed to stop saying that. Because this time his mind was a little more imaginative while he stared at her lips and thought about the way she might say that on her knees in front of him.

He shook his head clear. She was an insufferable nuisance that he just barely tolerated on a good day. He didn't need her clogging up his brain with her cock talk too.

“Just fix it.” He mumbled.

She huffed when he left her to her own devices, not even bothering to offer his help, but she really shouldn’t expect any less. If he helped her, he would be doing it all for her. And that was hardly the point of taking a class to learn how to sculpt if the hot instructor was just going to do everything for you.

“Is there a reason why you’re arguing with him about penises?” Rose asked, hushing her voice around the apparently taboo word.

“It’s fun. And if I’m going to sit here in this stupid class with you I’m going to have some fun.” Y/N, on the other hand, was not hushed or subtle at all, as she ripped off the phallic piece of clay from her sculpture.

Rose cringed when she glanced past Y/N to find Harry looking right at her. He had been helping someone a few seats down and clearly not far enough away to have missed what Y/N said. All of his features drooped and he looked genuinely upset. Rose wished she could put a filter over Y/N’s mouth to save everyone from her insensitive outbursts. Especially Harry. He always tried so hard and for Y/N to brush everything off and boil it all down to a ‘stupid class’ even broke Rose’s heart a little. So she could only imagine how Harry felt.

After their typical hour and a half was up, once everyone at least had some semblance of a body minus the legs and arms, Harry called the class back to order.

“Alright, that’s time. You can put your armatures back on the shelves, carefully. As always, I’ll be around for a little while after. Have a great rest of your night, I’ll see you all on Saturday.” He finished his spiel, turning away to help clean up before a lightbulb went off in his head and his voice rang through the studio again, “Oh, and make sure you bring your sketches back with you!”

Everyone worked on cleaning up, including Harry. And while Y/N took both her and Rose’s sculptures over to their respective spots on the shelves, Rose walked up to the front of the class without any warning whatsoever.

She tapped Harry’s shoulder and watched while his smile faded just the tiniest bit after he turned to find her. That Rose’s poor face had to be associated with the thunderstorm that was Y/N.

“I just wanted to say sorry… about Y/N.” Both Rose and Harry glanced at the girl in question near the back of the studio, playing with their two sculpted bodies like they were barbie dolls. “I forced her to do this with me so she hasn’t really taken it seriously. But I’m really enjoying the class, you’re a fantastic instructor.”

His smile returned again and if he was being honest with himself, it really did make him feel better to hear her say that. He had some sort of a reasoning for Y/N’s horrible attitude and while he wished it was her apologizing and not Rose, he figured it was good enough.

“Thank you. You’re doing really well so far. I’ll see you on Saturday, yeah?”

She nodded, giving him one last polite smile before trotting back to Y/N and helping her clean up the last bits around their workstation.

“Please do not tell me you were flirting with him.” Y/N gagged, using a ball of clay to gather the little pieces spread across their table like a magnet.

“No, actually, I was apologizing to him for your behavior.”

Y/N snapped her head up, first at Rose and then Harry all the way across the room from them. “You what?”

“He’s just trying to teach and you’ve been a fucking knobhead.”

Y/N gasped in fake offense, which was actually slightly real offense. “Excuse me, he made fun of my bowl the first day, you seem to have forgotten about that.”

“A toddler could have made a better bowl than that, Y/N, and you know it.”

She frowned, grumpily averting her eyes to the table with her arms crossed over her chest like she really was a toddler.

“I’m just saying,” Rose started, a bit calmer this time, “stop pestering him.”

*                                              *                                 *

Y/N thought about everything Rose had said. About how much she wished she could take things seriously and not constantly get on people’s nerves all the time, but she simply did not know how to. Taking the piss out of things and making jokes was how she got through her days.

But she did agree. Harry didn’t deserve her behavior. Maybe he was a bit of a jerk to her to begin with, but insulting his class might’ve been crossing a line.

Because she didn’t actually think it was stupid. She quite enjoyed listening to him. She liked learning something new and following his instructions as he walked them through some of his techniques. She liked being connected to all the people in the little studio, even if only briefly. Complete strangers all shared that one little thing in common and it made her all fuzzy and warm inside each time she met up with Rose at the end of every Wednesday and Saturday.

Hiding behind a bit of humor, however, was a lot more comfortable than admitting she found pleasure in anything as corny as sculpting classes.

On Friday night, boredom got the best of her and she took a chance upon searching Harry’s name on Instagram while she took her weekly bath. It had been Rose’s idea, the bath, not stalking her attractive sculpting instructor online. That decision was completely her own. But the baths at the end of stressful weeks had a little influence from her best friend, as did most aspects of her life. Baths were a waste of time, in her opinion, and she preferred the efficiency of showering. But Rose had given her nice smelling soaps and weird fizzy things for bath time and well… she couldn’t let them go to waste.

So, amid her regularly scheduled, once-a-week bath, she scrolled shamelessly through Harry’s feed. Because he did, in fact, have an instagram. And she only knew it was him because every fourth post was a video and in said videos were his hands. And, fuck, they were just as nice on film as they were in person.

He didn’t post much of his face, which she thought was an actual crime, but there was a lot about him and his sculpting. She found out it had been his sister’s birthday recently, who, when she smiled, looked just like him. He’d also just finished a piece he seemed really proud of, a clay head and bust of a pit bull, to which he linked in the caption about a local shelter who rescued the breed specifically and needed donations. Her heart nearly fucking melted.

Harry wasn’t much of an open book, though, unless he let his art do most of the talking. He seemed to enjoy sculpting women the most, which is probably why he’d been so good at de-lumping the breasts on Rose’s mermaid. But all the female sculptures he made weren’t sexual at all. They had meaning behind them. Like every single clay face she clicked on throughout his photos had a story. Like he was uplifting rather than fetishizing.

And not every single one of them was skinny and had perfect features. She was shocked to see at least half of the creations she’d skimmed through were of larger women with imperfect breasts at times and asymmetrical faces. Not sticking to typical European beauty standards as she may have originally assumed he might.

It made glancing down at her very much imperfect body feel a little less like an attack. Because Harry spent his time putting all his love into his little sculptures with diverse body types that she almost felt ashamed for ever hating hers.

Once she was done clicking on just about every single post he’d ever made, she finally found a selfie. Well… not really a selfie. Someone else had clearly taken it of him candidly while he had been working. But there was an awfully cute smile on his face and very familiar dimples poking into his cheeks that make her heart warm up again.

He wasn’t a damn thing like she’d assumed he was from the beginning. She thought his art centered around the ideal, and that maybe he was a little condescending because of it. But his Instagram told a different story about his art. And she wanted to know so much more about him.

She was completely lost in her dreams about him that just the smidge of distraction led to accidentally liking a photo of his from two years prior.

She’d have to move countries. Change her name. Delete everything. Never look back. Y/N? A distant memory.

Before dropping her phone in the tub and really making a complete ass out of herself, she threw it, instead, onto her furry rug in the middle of the bathroom and sunk herself down into the water. Wondering if it would really be so bad if she just drowned a little bit.

Because she desperately wanted to. There was nothing she could do. Not even unliking the picture would help. He’d still see the notification. Still click onto her page and realize who in the fuck had just liked a two-year-old post of his that he, himself, had probably even forgotten about.

She wanted nothing more than to sink her head under the pink-tinted water and never come back up. Her mind would not stop with the visualizations of what his reaction might be. Things he might be thinking. Like is this that fucking bitch from my sculpting class? Or whether or not she might find herself blocked by morning.

God, just make it stop.

But suddenly her phone buzzed and her heart just about stopped beating. It had to be the notification that Harry blocked her. Was that even a thing? Did Instagram notify you if someone blocked you? And why was her phone on silent? Because her Instagram notifications and her text messages made very different sounds. If it was just a text, she’d consider ignoring it. She’d continue marinating in all her shame a little while longer. But it ate her alive not knowing what the buzzing was from.

So, carefully, she pulled herself upright and reached across the floor until she had her phone in her hand. Before she clicked the screen on, though, she closed her eyes and inhaled a deep breath.

But when she opened her eyes and found out why her phone had buzzed, she let that breath out and settled her ass down again. It was Rose.

Hey, I can’t make it tomorrow for class. Felt like absolute shit at work today and had to go home because as it turns out I have the flu.

“Fuck,” Y/N mumbled to herself. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to go alone because facing Harry after she just did what she did was one thing, but doing it all by herself was another. But a part of her did still want to go tomorrow. The part before her horrific accident when she was full on getting a love boner over Harry. She’d wanted to see him again so fucking bad.

Okay. I probably won’t go too then

Y/N physically frowned at the idea of waiting another five days to see Harry again. Her brain really needed to make its fucking mind up about him. Did she want to see him or not?

No! You have to go and tell me what I missed!

Y/N rolled her eyes, but felt relieved. Even after her embarrassing slip up, her desire to see Harry again still prevailed. And she hated it. How was she even supposed to look him in the eye tomorrow, both of them knowing damn well she’d been stalking his Instagram back to two fucking years ago?

*                                              *                                 *

It was beyond weird sitting in their usual cafe on Justice Hill alone, even without the whole Instagram fiasco of the previous night she was trying everything in her power to forget about.

However all the desperate attempts to bury that awful experience were fruitless when she glanced across the room over her latte and found a very familiar set of grumpy-looking eyes already staring at her. But once she did notice him, he immediately looked away, stepping up to the counter to order his own cup of coffee.

She nearly choked on her drink, having to set it down and wipe what had spilled onto her chin off with a napkin she’d already used to sop up another one of her messes.

Of the three weeks now they’d been going to classes and frequenting the cafe just before, she’d never seen Harry. It was like he didn’t have a life outside being an instructor. He just popped up in the studio and she always left before him so she had no idea what he did after class either.

But seeing him here was like seeing a fucking unicorn in real life.

She couldn’t help watching him either, even if she knew she shouldn't. But, in her defense, he was wearing beautiful wine-colored corduroy pants with a tight white t-shirt tucked into them and a beige coat thrown over his arm to match. And for shoes he had on his usual white vans that had gained a few more scuff marks since the last time she’d seen him. His fashion would look terrible on anyone besides him.

He glanced her way again, briefly, when he left the counter with his cup, fighting his legs from walking in her direction but not exactly winning that battle.

And to her surprise, he stood right in front of her, behind the chair where Rose usually sat.

And when she looked up at him, he completely forgot why he had come over. He had no fucking clue what he was doing there. But it was too late now for him to back away and pretend like it never happened.

“Your friend's not coming?” His voice shook, but she didn’t notice with the way he finally took his fucking eyes off of her and gave her a chance to breathe again. He glanced at his watch just to confirm that it was, in fact, only five minutes until class started and it seemed reasonable to assume Rose wasn’t meeting her before then.

She pulled herself together and pretended like his close presence wasn’t intimidating her in the slightest.

“Disappointed?” She tilted her head, smirking at him. She had no right to think he liked her better than Rose. She, herself, liked Rose better too. So she was sure he had to be at least a little bit sad to see Rose missing.

He smiled and the second she saw those dimples she was reminded of his Instagram all over again.

“A little,” he nodded, pinching his thumb and index finger together in the air and she painfully agreed.

“Well, you get me all by myself tonight.” She didn’t realize how it sounded until it was too late. Until she was cringing at all the sexual insinuations she’d just made for absolutely no reason. She could have said something else that wasn’t laced in an innuendo. But no, of course not. She had to continue her embarrassing streak when it came to Harry.

Instead of being creeped out by her, however, and pulling a confused and slightly terrified face, he laughed. And, on God, his laugh was the most amazing thing she’d ever heard. This wasn’t the first time the sound of his laughter graced her eardrums, but it was the first time he was laughing because of something she said that wasn’t about crooked penises.

“Lucky me.”

He left her so fucking speechless, that after he started backing away from her table, reminding her to not be late, she still ended up being late. Because she sat in her chair for what felt like a century repeating his two words over and over again in her head.

Lucky me.

She knew he was only teasing but the way he’d just gone along with her original joke and how his voice sounded when he said it, she could not believe it. She could also not believe how Harry had some kind of massive hold on her that she sat staring at a wall for ten minutes trying to figure out how to operate properly again just to get up out of her chair.

Lucky fucking me.

She could scream.

If she wasn’t in public.

There was an extra pep in her step as she took Justice Hill alone this time, partially because of how giddy Harry had made her and partially because she was late… right after he told her not to be. But how was she supposed to be on time after what he’d just done to her emotions. And to the throbbing mess between her legs, but that's another story entirely.

Everyone was all over the place when she’d finally arrived, though, so it made slipping in the back that much easier. Not that she got past Harry’s watchful eyes, though, but at least she wasn’t interrupting anything while the class readied their workstations for another full night of going ham on their sculptures.

Harry kept his eyes on her mostly the entire time she did the same at her empty little area, watching as she tucked her purse under the desk for safekeeping and threw a couple tools he wasn’t sure he’d ever seen her use onto the table. When she wandered off to the wall of shelves to retrieve her absolutely horrifying work of art, he finally gave her some privacy again. But he couldn’t help the fact that he’d been worried sick when she didn’t show up on time after he’d just seen her at the cafe, thinking something horrible could have happened to her between there and here.

So making sure she was unscathed before he, too, got his area organized was essential.

She sat in her chair and stared at what she had made the past three weeks. They’d started with something simple on the first day, taking a pre-cut slice of clay and free-handing a bowl with a few tips from Harry thrown in here and there. Then they jumped straight in after he showed them a few clips of sculptors working, pausing to explain specific things about creating a head and face. They were given everything they needed to make sculpting a complete figurine of a human body as easy as possible.

And still, she managed to create a combination of Shrek and the abominable snowman.

She huffed, wondering if she asked nicely enough Harry would let her just start all over. But before she could even think to do so, he clapped his hands together and got everyone’s attention for today’s mini-tutorial.

He explained smoothing to them and how there were many different ways of doing it so that your end results weren't littered in fingerprints. He reminded them to use water to smooth out the initial shapes of the clay they wanted and if they were having a really hard time with too much warmth from their fingers to use the gloves.

He ventured a little into detail work of the bust, showing a short clip of another artist forming collar bones with just two tools and her fingers. He explained what tools those were and why they were the most efficient for details and went on some more about other detail tools that were good for different things.

And the entire time she was far too lost in his voice and how his eyes lit up passionately when he rambled to even think about the fact that she wasn’t taking a single note for Rose’s sake.

They’d done a few lessons on details for the face, but they had yet to really get that far, only having put on tentative eyelids, lips and a nose for their heads before he really dove deep into details in what she assumed would be a full class later on.

And when he finally took a break to ask for any questions, she was, of course, the first to raise her hand. He thought about ignoring it, knowing all too well that anytime Y/N raised her hand in the back of his classroom, she was up to no good. But he was too nice to do that to anyone, even her.

So he called on her by nodding his head and she cleared her throat while he grimaced, expecting the worst.

“So, um, for example if we were going to do bigger details like abs on a male figure, what would be the best tool for that?”

He could have sworn he was having a heart attack. He had to blink a few times just to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. She was actually asking him a legitimate question, and a good one at that. He had to repeat what she said in his head first, just to make sure it was real, before he answered, completely unprepared.

“Um… well after you lay out the clay where you want on the body, you can use one of the knives to blend the edges,” he held up an example of one for her, “and then a large ball or oval tool like this,” he held up another, “to smooth everything out. You’d probably want a more blunt pointed end to shape them, though, after you blend the clay in.”

She nodded like she’d been fully absorbing every single word coming out of his mouth and then he watched as she dug around quietly in the tool kit on her desk, in search of the types of tools he’d mentioned.

He could not fucking believe it though. She finally showed a stitch of interest in learning about sculpting. And he had no idea why she decided to right now. Maybe it was because she was without her partner in crime, but either way he was stunned. Absolutely fucking marveled.

After a few more questions and some demonstrations, he let everyone go and continue working on their projects while he circled the room as he normally did. And he found himself glancing at her from time to time, all by herself in the back with a genuine look of concentration on her face as she attempted making her creature a little less loch ness monster and a little more human.

Eventually, after he figured she was giving it enough effort for him to step in and help if she needed, he headed her way. And just as she sensed him walking down her aisle, while she was busy shaving off clay, a piece of it went flying into the air, completely out of control.

He stopped in his tracks after almost being smacked in the face with a chunk of clay and bent over to pick it up before someone squished it into the bottom of their shoes. He leaned over the edge of the table in front of her again, setting the piece of clay down next to her gently while she bit her lips between her teeth and tried to hide her embarrassed red cheeks behind her hands.

“Sorry!” She squealed at him, further digging herself into a hole.

He shook his head, “S’alright. Not the first time that’s happened.”

She laughed at the thought of him actually getting hit in the money maker with a hunk of clay and it eased her worries a little.

“So how are those abs going then?” He asked.

She stared at her sculpture for a moment before she sighed and turned it around to face him. It wasn’t as bad as it had been before, but it was still pretty rough.

“Mind if I…?” He held his hands out and she, without a single hesitation, handed it over to him.

He immediately grabbed the shaving tool she’d been using, and since it still sat next to her where she’d put it down moments ago, his fingers brushed against her hand when he picked it up. Sending every one of her nerves in the general area on a field day to mess with her nether regions again. It’s just… his fucking hands were an art form in and of themselves. His knuckles prominent, stretching soft skin around the bone. His veins protruding every time he made a more delicate move that required precision. Even the ones on his arms underneath the ink when he was a bit more rough with her sculpture sent her over the moon, while he shaved off bits and pieces with firm pressure to define the shape of the body and somehow create a human-like figure from her mess.

Then he started smoothing down the surface with a little water on his fingers and she went batshit. His hands while dry were one thing, but sparkling, wet, slippery fingertips? Lord have mercy.

She watched him spread a chunk of extra clay onto what would be the figure’s chest to build it up a little more with the knowledge of their previous conversations about dicks and abs making it clear she was attempting to make a male figure. She couldn’t help but watch his muscles flex underneath his tight white t-shirt. From far away across the cafe it had caught her attention. And now right here, she was definitely not letting it go unnoticed. It wasn’t too tight that he looked ridiculous, but just the right amount to show off every curve of his biceps and triceps and whatever other -ceps he had hiding underneath the shirt. He was normally in oversized tops so she was taking full advantage while she still had the chance to.

When he handed it back to her, it was like he’d done some kind of magic spell to get it to look so good after what she’d given him to work with. He leaned forward a little more and pointed at the figure’s chest and she was only halfway paying attention to him when he spoke, mostly focusing on how close he was and every single time he accidentally brushed his skin against hers.

“So if you want to make the abs,” he paused to glance over and dig through her pile of tools until he found the one he was looking for. “Use this to kind of sketch out the shape like we did with the faces,” he took the ball tool and rolled it down the middle of the chest, making a short indent to separate where the pectorals might be, “then you can add on the dimension like I was saying earlier.”

She took over the tool when he flipped it around and gave it to her so she could try for herself. And he watched for a short while as she did what he said to do, sketching out tentative abs, but not really knowing exactly what they looked like to come to any sort of realistic end. Her figure started to look like a shirtless Johnny Bravo.

He just giggled and pointed his stupid finger back into her personal space, smoothing down her mistakes until they disappeared, “Have you never seen a six-pack that wasn’t on a cartoon character?”

She racked her brain, trying to say something funny, but once she looked into his eyes, nothing came to mind. “Of course I have. I just don’t know how to make them look realistic.” She couldn’t exactly remember the last time she’d been faced with a naked man’s chest, but she had seen them before.

“Well…” Harry sighed, resting his head on his hand and staring at her sculpture sideways, “he doesn’t have to have abs.”

And then she said it. Something worse than her earlier set of words back at the cafe. She had no clue what was going on with her tonight, but she needed an ass-kicking for it.

“Do you have abs?”

“Me?” His eyes flickered up to hers in shock and it was far too late for her to backtrack, she was here and she had to face what she’d done. Even while he looked at her like she was fucking insane.

“Uh, well. I mean…” She had no fucking clue what she meant. And even if she did, she sure as shit wasn’t telling him.

Then it clicked in his brain. “You’re not using me as reference, are you?”

After a solid three seconds of just staring at him, she laughed. “No, of course not.”

“Hope so after you gave him that wonky penis.”

She sighed once they were through it. Once he’d proved, yet again, that he didn’t make her embarrassing statements feel as bad as they really were. He kind of just... went along with it.

But then she made it even worse.

“So yours isn’t wonky and crooked, then?”

Jesus, fuck Y/N just shut up.

His smile never faded, however, and instead, he leaned close again and whispered, “Maybe one day you’ll be lucky enough to find out.”

[scottydelacruz]

So thanks to moving into uni and classes I wasn't able to watch the last 3 episodes of WWDITS. Heartbreaking. But I like looking back at my live reactions so I am gonna watch em all now and master post em. What's the worst that can happen.

Episode 5: The Chamber of Judgement

Guillermo and The Guide both waiting in the shadows (heh) for them is such a good moment.

I love that Lazlo and Colin just being completely uninterested in the Council and just fuckin around with Shaun is so sweet. Just gonna let the world know that there is a fanfic shipping Lazlo and Shaun and I support it it's funny.

Kingmaker Guillermo enters the chat.

The Guy Pillow guy looks a little like Paul Hollywood and now I'm dying.

Shaun is in an MLM. I'm scared for him. Poor boy.

Guillermo wants the throne. I approve of this plan. He deserves it.

Guillermo and Nandor are boyfriends only RN it's in spirit.

Colin 'the guy who looks like a foetus' Robinson.

LAZLO IS GOIN TO COURT. YES!

Guillermo wants something. Power hungry Guillermo is weird I don't subscribe. It makes me uncomfy.

I wanna do the sick white robe running and dancing.

Why did they keep on walking put of the caravan.

Derek has Doc Martens and a hellhound. Beautiful.

LAZLO! IN COURT! WITH BOXES OF PORNOGRAPHY! I LOVE IT!

Awww I feel bad for poor Lazlo, failing like that.

Lazlo standing just completely gone is how I feel after a heavy conversation.

Episode 6: The Escape

Oh they fucked up. They fucked up bad.

Honestly I respect The Sire. Sire hungy, Sire dig hole, Sire stop hungy.

Lazlo: No, it's a fucking urban myth, like ghosts and large penises. 👀 👀 👀

Is it Baron time? It's Baron time.

Girly-Jim. He did nail it.

Guillermo is done, disgusted, and in danger.

NADJA DOLL STAN.

Once again, not a fan of Guillermo power

I did not know The Watchers are ladies. I have only seen screencaps. I love them.

The Baron riding on the hellhound is way funnier in motion.

How *do* you know what vampire piss tastes like.

Yeah racism orgies sound fun.

I partially retract my statement Guillerrmo bitchslapping Nandor was awesome.

The Sire looks cool AF. The harmonica isn't going to work.

OH MY GODS LAZLO HARMONICA VOICE IS BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT I LOVE IT!

Nandor pulling Guillermo too early is definitely no homo.

How has it taken Colin until the year of our lord 2021 to learn about that's what she said. Boy we be reppin that joke for decades.

Oh my I want a TV show of The Sire, The Baron, and the hellhound. They are an adorable combo. We stan and ship.

That Hussein press conference reference tho. Beautiful.

Episode 7: The Siren

(I have seen nothing about this episode yet so this is full blind).

Lazlo and Colin Robinson are the true buddy cop duo. They got that vibe.

SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA.

Israel/Palestine being described as a win/win is terrifying.

Poor Nadja doll, she can't get around. We need to get her a car or something too.

Guillermo calling out the camera crew is powerful but unfair they did it because you both have the same problem you stupid man.

Is it just me or has the art team declined a little. A couple of them have looked a bit off. They are mostly good still.

Poor Nadja doll. I feel bad for her. I will miss her, even if we barely see her.

Colin rubbing his chest is a oddly sensual view. I don't know how I feel.

OH NO. The Guide is being oddly seductive with Guillermo I don't want to read into it.

That siren has clicky legs. Very clicky. Like my bones.

Guillermo having a longing moment with LEGO is a big mood.

LMFAO? IN YOUR COMFORT TV SHOW? ITS MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK.

That Nadja doll rat is scary.

He's gonna buy a tricopter. He is.

Lazlo should not be allowed in Best Buy.

Guillermo I'm sorry but good luck.

Colin stop singing I'm in pain.

Colin please don't do this she will eat you.

Nadja doll rat is powerful.

Nadja doll is back baby! I am so glad.

RIP camera crew. We appreciate your service.

They could totally travel to Plum Island again.

Honestly I respect Colin beating off.

And that is me done wow powerful time I will not get over the Scott Baluka for a while.

[knchins]

Double Down - Chisaki Kai

Summary:  After taking you out for dinner, Chisaki decides you need to be punished for your inappropriate behavior. (masterlist)

Pairing: Chisaki Kai x Fem!Reader

Rating: E+

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings:  Dubcon, jealousy, double penetration, lots of choking and hair pulling, dirty/degradation talk, squirting, and minor aftercare

Notes:  This was written for the @bnhabookclub​ weekly NSFW prompt. It started out as a Jealous!Character x Friend!Character but devolved into something quite different lol. So I decided to use the dialogue prompt instead :) Heavy warnings, please be safe while reading. I'm terrible at writing aftercare so please keep that in mind.

 You had been an unlikely duo from the start. Perhaps your quirklessness was what he found most alluring about you, as he tended to think of quirks as a curse, but truthfully you weren’t completely sure. It could have been that your own opinion on quirks wasn’t too far off. Having similar ideologies seemed to make you that much more compatible

 In your last serious relationship, your boyfriend had used his quirk to abuse, manipulate, and cheat on you any chance he got. It had torn you down so badly that in the end, Chisaki had to rescue you from yourself. When he found you on the brink of death, he did something extremely out of character for himself and reversed all of your wounds. You wouldn’t be here today if it weren’t for him, and because of that you cared deeply for him.

 Since then he had always taken control of any situation you found yourself in. And in his own subtle way, he showed you how much he cared over and over. The only time he used his quirk on you was to heal you and never to hurt you. It came in handy after some of the rougher scenes you partook in. His healing just became an aftercare routine.

 Right now though, you knew something was wrong. Ever since you two had finished your meal at the restaurant, Chisaki had been silent. Although he was typically quiet and reserved by nature, it was more so than usual. Any attempt at small talk had been thwarted.

 During dinner, the waiter had relentlessly flirted with you. You still had a lingering blush on your cheeks from all of the attention. Typically when people saw you with Chisaki, they avoided you. They wouldn’t speak or even acknowledge you. His presence was just that threatening and his criminal ranking that well known.

 He had asked you to wait outside for a moment, saying he needed to take care of something before you walked back home together. It seemed innocent enough and you had no reason to speculate any wrongdoing.

 Still, his anger was definitely noted, however you waited to address it when the two of you returned to his compound. You knew it was better to discuss his foul mood in private than while on the street.

 “Kai,” You murmured to him, “are you upset with me?”

 He tutted, slipping off his jacket. “You? No.” You watched as he took off his shirt as well, revealing his defined muscular build. You swallowed thickly, enjoying the view as well as the relief at knowing that he wasn’t mad at you.

 “But I am going to punish you.” He added darkly, turning to catch your eyes within his own. Your breath caught in your throat, eyes widening as you began to wring your hands together.

 “W-Why?” Your voice shook as you backed away from him. He was taking broad steps towards you and was in your personal space in a few quick strokes. His eyes were piercing, the fury evident within them as he towered over you.

 “For being such a little slut tonight.” His hands darted out, ripping off your shirt as you tried feebly to resist. Your nails bit at his biceps as you attempted to get him off. Despite your fight, your thin panties were starting to flood. This little game of cat and mouse you always played was so goddamn enticing.

 Hot lips and teeth attacked your neck as his firm hands moved over your body, anchoring you to the wall behind you. Your bra was gone in a flash, torn to ribbons and laid to rest on the floor. The rubbery feel of his white gloves against your supple breasts had you hiccuping back cries.

 Golden eyes seemed to see right through the crocodile tears. “I-I didn’t-” You stuttered, weakly digging your nails further into the flesh of his arms.

 Suddenly a hand was on your throat as the other continued to undress you. You could no longer speak, breaths coming out in shallow pants. “Did you really think I wouldn’t notice?” He asked, “you continued to lead that waiter on. Make him think he had a chance at your tight little pussy. You want to give it up to him too, Y/N? You’re my dumb whore, don’t fucking forget that.”

 He forced your legs apart with his knee, shoving it up against your cunt. Another wordless plea escaped as your hips bucked in search of even the tiniest bit of friction. The small sparks of pleasure cause you to move them more, chasing after something that wasn’t nearly as satisfying as you had hoped.

 “Look at you, trying to fuck my thigh.” He hissed. Your skirt was pooled at your ankles, abandoned like nearly everything else you had been wearing. “I’m going to fucking      ruin     you.”

 The hand on your throat suddenly grabbed a fistful of hair. He yanked you down, dragging you to the small futon on the floor. You stumbled, trying to stay standing to where his grip didn’t hurt as badly, however you tripped over your own clothes. You fell, the only thing keeping you upright was Chisaki’s grip on your hair. Your scalp burned with pain, pressure surrounding the delicate follicles as you struggled to regain your footing while he continued to pull your body towards the other side of the room.

 He threw you down and you landed face first into the futon, ass in the air and on display for him. You turned your head to watch in fear as he snapped the elastic of your panties so hard that it tore. They slid down to rest lifelessly at your bent knees.

 Using his gloved fingers, he spread your lips apart, observing how much moisture had collected at your core. You clenched your muscles and tried to shy away from him, but Chasaki pinched your outer labia hard enough to make you cry out in pain. “Don’t be shy now, little slut.” He said through clenched teeth. “I can see how wet you are. I’m going to make you regret ever batting those pretty eyelashes at that asshole.”

 You heard the sound of his belt unbuckling. “But since you wanted him so bad, I decided to bring a piece of him home with me.” Kai continued, his voice nothing short of a growl. Your eyes widened, flooded with tears that were yet to fall as not one, but two cocks emerged from his underwear, stacked vertically.

 “You wanted to fuck him so badly, Y/N, didn’t you? You made me do this. He didn’t have to die but you couldn’t shut that fucking mouth of yours.” He grabbed two condoms, having never been able to allow himself the pleasure of going bare. The mere idea of your juices intermingling made him break out into hives. He rarely touched you without his gloves on, but this was something you were totally used to. Kisses on the mouth were almost nonexistent, not that you minded.

 The thought of him killing someone over jealous spite made your stomach churn. While overall his possessiveness had caused a title wave between your thighs, the idea that him ending a life because of it made it all too real for you. Chisaki Kai could kill you in an heartbeat if he really wanted to, if you pushed him too far, or maybe accidentally pressed a button you shouldn’t have pressed. Somehow this notion caused your arousal to burst into hot flames, the edge of life and death making this game so much more alluring.

 He pressed the tips of both penises to your holes as your body quivered from how tensely you were contracting your muscles. Your true punishment was about to occur, him going into your asshole without any lubricant. You swallowed hard, knowing you were about to be in a lot of pain simply due to the size of his new cock.

 His hand reared back to slap your ass hard, the stinging pain making you cry out as tears finally cascaded down your face. “I can’t wait any longer,” You said weakly, the anticipation of the torturous act he was about to do was driving you to the brink of insanity.

 “What’s that?” He asked, voice grating. “You want both of your dirty holes filled at the same time? My, my what a little whore you are.”

 His hands latched onto your hips, forcing them upward just a fraction before he pushed in ruthlessly. The sweet mix of pain and pleasure ripped through you as both of his cocks filled you and the sob that came out was more than enough to tell him that he had won. Pain ripped through you light lightning as you were forced to stretch to accommodate him. You tried to breathe through it, allow yourself to relax your abdominal muscles to ease the tension. Nothing seemed to help.

 Chisaki grabbed another fistful of hair, yanking back so that you were up on your hands and knees. He didn’t give you time to adjust to his sizes, simply ramming into you with force great enough to push you down into the mattress. Your scalp screamed in pain as your body tried to careen forward from the force of his hips.

 Tears continued to fall helplessly as your nose began to run. He was crashing into your weak pussy and tight ass with greater speed each time, never the one to give you any sort of break. “Fuck, look at you taking my cocks like the little tramp that you are.” His balls slapped hard against your clit, making your thighs quake. You felt so full, so complete, so utterly ravaged...

 “Is my cock not enough for a horny bitch like you?” He asked, pulling you up onto your knees as the hand that was on your hip came around to press against your sternum. Your head was forced back towards his shoulder due to his continued hold on your hair. “You need your ass fucked too? Is that it, slut? You can’t have just one?”

 Your eyes rolled back as he continued to destroy you with his body and voice. The hand that had been on your chest captured your throat once more in a vice grip. You clawed at it, trying to pry it off but to no avail. You cried weakly, trying to scream but nothing auditory seemed to come out. Your voice was gone as he continued to double fuck you.

 A tight coil wound deep inside of your abdomen grew more and more tense as the tears from your eyes began to make his grip on your neck slippery. You were so close to snapping, so close to the edge that you teetered back and forth. Your vision was blurring, becoming hazy due to the lack of oxygen.

 “You’re going to come all over me, now?” He hissed into your ear dangerously. “Come on, little whore, get off on me using you like a personal fuck toy.”

 Something inside of you shattered as he relaxed his grip on your throat. Blood rushed to your brain, flooding you with endorphins as you came so hard that you squirted all over the futon, soaking it as you spasmed against him. He didn’t let up, letting you go so you fell into the puddle of your own ejaculate.

 You were unable to speak as your mouth hung agape, tongue out in a classic ahegao as he rubbed you raw from the inside with both of his cocks. Chisaki continued to ram into you before both shafts pulsated. His grip on your hips was utterly bruising as he pushed himself until he fell off his own edge, spilling into both condoms simultaneously.

 His shoulders slumped forward as he took in large gulps of air, releasing you so that your lower body fell helplessly into the wet mattress. He removed himself from you, covered in hives despite his precautions.

 He took off his gloves and condoms before picking you up into his arms, cradling you into his chest as he took your spent form into the bathroom. He cut on the hot water, setting you down gently on the ledge inside to rest while he washed himself thoroughly.

 Slowly the red marks strewn across his skin faded and he began to wash you, touching your blue and purple skin softly as he activated his quirk to heal you. The small rips and tears as well as the blood that had pooled beneath the surface of your skin disappeared. You looked up at him with tired, loving eyes.

 Chisaki fixed his body back to normal, the penis of the waiter de-materialized into thin air. “You did so well, princess.” He said in a calm voice as he continued to look you over for any sign of hurt. “Did you enjoy it?” He pressed, wanting to make sure he hadn’t somehow crossed a line.

 You nodded, eyes closing as you rested your back against the wall of the shower. Despite him healing you, you were much too tired to articulate any kind of verbal response to his question. You felt him press a chaste kiss to your forehead before turning off the hot water.

 He grabbed a large fluffy towel to wrap you in. “You can stay in my room tonight.” He said, noting that your futon would need to be cleaned before you could sleep in it again. While he was not one for sharing beds, he did lend you his when it was necessary while he slept on the nearby couch.

 He attempted to set you down, but you quickly tried to grab onto something as your legs failed you. Chisaki caught you with ease, bringing you to him so he could set you down gently on a nearby chair. He put on a clean robe before grabbing a pair of pajamas to help you into. Once clothed he carried you into his bedroom and tucked you snuggly into his plush bed.

 “Goodnight, angel.” He whispered as your eyes slid shut and you fell into a peaceful slumber.

[incarnateirony]

The start of a gallery regarding Belphegor and the guys, but including a great deal of meta and extra gifs behind the cut, including relevance explicitly to Dean and Castiel, as well as Belphegor’s mythological relevance.

Edit: Since this post is making the rounds I’ma drop in my Belphegor meta-fanvid too. The meta/extra gifs are below the vid. 

Yeah I know I’m a day late, no I don’t know if anyone has beaten me to this, I know some people beat me to talking about belphegor beyond me vagueblog screaming about him showing up on twitter with livetweets. For those who haven’t seen:

Belphegor - a Moabite god absorbed into Hebrew lore and then Christianity as a major DEMON. The name Belphegor means “lord of opening” or “lord Baal of Mt. Phegor.” As a Moabite deity, he was known as Baal-Peor and ruled over fertility and sexual power. He was worshipped in the form of a phallus. -- that giant rock he talked about worshipping, there you go.

In the KABBALAH, Belphegor was an angel in the order of principalities prior to his fall. He is one of the Togarini, “the wranglers.” He is an archdemon who is part of the demonic counterparts to the angels who rule the 10 sephirot of the Tree of Life; he rules over the sixth sephirah. He sits on a pierced chair, for excrement is his sacrificial offering. In Christian demonology, Belphegor is the incarnation of one of the SEVEN DEADLY SINS, sloth, characterized by negligence and apathy. According to St. Thomas Aquinas, all sins that arise from ignorance are caused by sloth. 

Belphegor also rules misogyny and licentious men. He emerged from HELL to investigate the marital state among humans. For a time, he lived as a man to experience sexual pleasures. Appalled, he fled back to hell, happy that intercourse between men and women did not exist there.-- here’s the big block that I find fascinating.

Gully, Rosemary. 2009. The Encyclopedia of Demons and Demonology. New York: Visionary Living, Inc., pp. 27-28.

(For more discussion of Belphegor’s history and mythology on this blog, click this link (x) but I’m mostly narrowing it down to what’s relevant for address here.)

With that out of the way, I refer you to the gallery above, which is only a fraction of what I’ve clipped from the episode.

(Edit: As new things have come to light with a rewatch, or as new thoughts come up, I’ve been reblogging this post with additions; however, at the end of the post, I’m going to make headline titles for update thresholds and include it in here as a sort of Belphegor introduction masterpost. Any time I get to glance at part of this episode again it just gets LOUDER.)

The camera work is uncanny. Castiel and Dean are repeatedly cast not only as a unit, or Sam blotted off, or divided, but of a point of focus. A few more examples:

Oh wow Belphegor really just staring at them.

Think I’m just choosing frames I like? Check back at the scene. Whenever Sam engages it’s literally from a different, peripheral shot as so:

This filming style isn’t single shots, but the entire scene. Oh, I don’t mean the entire scene, I mean the entire episode. The only place this rule wavers is when literally everybody is packed in the Impala, including when they save the mother and child, and until people decompress it’s impossible to do such controlled shots.

But then there IS when they decompress as I put in the original gallery.

Belphegor sits witness to the pain and upset over Cas, unable to look at him. And, shortly after talking about the giant penis he used to worship and flirting with Dean, asks who the child was to them after Cas has stormed out, finding out about it being their son.

At this point both Castiel and Dean have had their standoffs with Belphegor, which I side by sided in the top gallery. But Dean’s integration with Belphegor goes an entirely extra level.

We’ll handwave any deep readings about the heart of a man being needed -- but the simple fact is, as we know, this is when Dean and Belphegor encounter the white woman.

That alone is a fascinating point;

Whether you take Sam’s encounter as his serial killer fetish, or his clown phobia, or some people’s read of toxic parenting, or a combination of these -- the first two more likely to tickle the general audience -- this is clear.

Whether you take Cas’ encounter with Bloody Mary as the secret about Jack and guilt over Mary, or the secret over the Empty and general guilt over failing Jack, his connection is loudly clear.

The woman in white was a spouse betrayed by her partner and driven to madness where she killed her children and then herself -- something fairly clear if we remember the metaphorical ledge Dean was on at the end of the season that he steered away from, but the argument continues.

Blahblah *heterosexual handwave* just subtext just interpretation only the other two matter for Reasons(TM), we know how that will go. This, or the random divorce drop from the victim girls for totally inoccuous and random reasons aside, is just a worthwhile note to put in here as we consider the framing of Belphegor.

Throughout the episode, Sam has no identifiable major exchange with Belphegor. He happens to be in the vicinity, occasionally mediating Dean and Cas, or in the same car, but there is no forward led conversation, there is no personal tension or banter, and most of all there isn’t even any attempt at directorial focus. If anything, directorial blotting. Sam’s plot shines more in being a forward moving, smart hunter mediating the two here, but if we’re here to look at Belphegor--

As Castiel sadly watches the rescued mother and child go to the school, in the wake of the death of his son, Dean only tersely checks on him. It’s strained, and Castiel is left staggered, only for us yet again to find Belphegor framed into the conversation, observing, as he has through the previous shots.

Belphegor’s placement is right between Dean and Cas, leaving it almost inevitable that as we move forward, he will annex emotional territory if by trust or nuisance to dig a deeper wound and antagonize the marriage he observes dissolving in front of him, a very personal and living manifestation of their struggles for these two to overcome, and inevitably part of what will send Castiel away briefly in 15.3 as he feels himself growing more and more detached from the Winchesters -- particularly Dean, as Sam is actively still engaging with him as is typical of them but like Entertainment Weekly recently put it, Castiel does has his favorite Winchester, and they’re totally-not-going-through-divorce-waves here, just totally heterosexual brovorce, of course. 

Given considering my position of the overt and present canonicity of their relationship please note I’m only writing sarcastically towards the inevitable stupidity that haunts this fandom via anti dialogue and those that internalize it, but here it is, folks.  

If anyone wants to even try to challenge me, I invite them to find Sam drawing belphegor’s focus on any front or being framed in the shots as Castiel and Dean are here. Belphegor is ... going to be a ride, folks. Buckle up. He’s literally been observing the hunter husbands, wracked with pain over the loss of their child, in active conflict despite their lingering stance as a unit, having held his ground with both of them to feel out their pain and rage each to themselves, and left to sit, and watch, and find what dark humor he may watch from them. 

“Wanna talk about it?”

(Suggested reading: check out @tinkdw​‘s post about them dividing Cas from his humanity *ba dum chink* and focusing on his angelicness this episode) 

----

UPDATE 1

A belated addendum a few hours late I forgot to include but intended to: It has not escaped me that Dean and Cas also were both part of Belphegor’s spell casting. The aforementioned heart of a man with the trivial second ingredient of salt (truly not trivial at all in the alchemical scale of it, but that’s a topic for another time--just in SPNverse it seems weirdly easy; breaking down the alchemy in the last few seasons and the use of the salt in spell is its own essay), and the other common graveyard dirt and very conveniently angel blood. These things both created intensely powerful deus ex machinas that fall back to other points I made in the OP that are incredibly suspicious about the arrangement, and I’m more curious on if we should expect multiple parts of a spell eg reverse trials if you will or what. 

I don’t consider these things a lack in SPN spellcasting integrity in writing. I consider these warnings.

UPDATE 2

Along with updates in the original post, someone posted this clip on twitter giggling about Dean’s expression, and something else I somehow missed the first time caught my eye.

Every time Belphegor opts to observe people or turn, while he comments on beauty and appearance (or stone penises or Dean being gorgeous), beyond his individual compliment of Dean – he is turning his head at couples. Or, well, we assume couples. At Units Of Two People. The two people units are:

A woman and a woman A man and a woman A man and a man.

Outside of the vehicle Belphegor is not taking any particular time paying attention to individuals. Only duos. The two women pass in front of the hearts, and one (the woman in khaki) even gestures at it to sort of make the woman in green look.

The man and the women walk by, vaguely locking arms. 

Belphegor looks straight between these units. He leans forward, discussing people on earth being attractive. He turns and looks out the window to observe the two men now walking past the window with hearts.

Drops the comment about worshipping a giant penis, and so forth.

But the direct observation of duos, potentially queer ones literally framed in hearts in case anybody misses it for not being hetnorm, is… well, in lieu of the OP, this is. Yeah. It’s a whole thing. Holy crap.

UPDATE 3

This one isn’t necessarily big enough for a central update, and isn’t even entirely Belphegor focused as Belphegor adjacent. A friend ( @tarend ) had asked passively why bikes were so prominently featured in this episode, so here’s what I’ve found.

The green and blue bikes feature predominantly in the clown victim house from the first scene we see the garage, fairly early in the episode and every other showing until they’re extracted from the house. Often central, doorway, access, or backshadow in most shots. Trying to pin it on a single character would be ignoring the broadness of it, but the presence was enough to take note of.

Various two people units roll around with bikes of different and more muted colors.

The two dudes, one of them has a green bike and one has a grocery sack which I imagine ISN’T fruit from the tree of life.

I do find it weird and, especially since the green and blue bike collectively manage to get several shared minutes of screen time in a busy episode, I have to wonder, but I can’t find anything meaningful here without jumping to the common “green and blue” thing and a random joke-reach towards Queen which isn’t really my flavor of meta despite it even kind of matching the people passing by. The overlap is there and tangible, regardless, and passes in the background of Belphegor, so I’ll leave that here as a general sentiment. 

Compared to the above gold mine of far more overt material, if this ever was intended to be an intentional nod of some sort, I feel like it’s been overshadowed entirely by the other content which might as well have been blasted from a bull horn, but maybe someone else can find use in it in association. Aside from the street highlights in the car while Dean sits by with Belphegor, the prominent double bike placement is best witnessed rather than screenshot into eternity in any scene involving Clown House Garage.

Though I may point out the dynamic impala shot with the paired bikes in the background is immediately followed by a stroller that colllectively haunt the three people in the car, but whether I’d swear to that being intentionally syncretic, I’m unsure. But I do feel it’s worth notating.

I’m sure you all know I’m guarded about things like this fandom’s build on key colors and don’t apply it in meta outside of standard lighting theory, and generally even props are things I ignore unless they’re actual framing and blocking focuses, but the bikes do ride a line. They just lack the overall thematic story use most things I talk about do, like mystic symbols and the ilk. I would probably completely disregard this were it not for the other elements above, but now I’ll be keeping an eye on it.

UPDATE 4

Yet another thought more from @tarend than me, but his ass just about never posts so I might as well plug it into the viral post with some credit.

There seems to be painstaking effort to frame Belphegor with stop signs.

Cough

Crack aside it’s just some angle play that could be coincidence but I’m going to be throwing that out there for meta fodder for others while this spreads around until I can truly rewatch since life is seriously climbing me right now.

Tarend also points out the school was named after The Great Dissenter (Link).

I’m going to have a bit of a comparative study on Belphegor’s and Chuck’s mannerisms for consideration but life didn’t even give me 30 minutes for a video edit today much less a rewatch.