#havin a fucking Crisis at almost 2am
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jdosjdoshdow why do i feel like im goin thru a midlife crisis when im only 15
#aka what i THOUGHt i wanted to do with my life#is that what i really want??? and at this point im kinda too scared to change??? fuck lmfao#like idk i used to want to be an astrophysicist but i honest to god despise math and i dont think that will ever change#and so much is based off math like will i really enjoy that? or do i just enjoy lookin st pretty space pictures and thinkin abt space on a#theoretical level and not on a Cold Hard Math level#and yknow now its like..... do i maybe wanna be a geologist... but the thing is i know like. nothing sbt actual jobs in that field????#and AGAIN like i love rocks and minerals but is it. just that? wouldni be interested in an actual job with it#like i mean i enjoyed earth science so???#i cant really tell until i take astronomy as a class... which will he this year#i wish i couldve taken it earlier but my fucking schedule had no room#if i took it earlier i wouldve had w better idea if i really enjoy it#bc now i gotta really start thinkin abt college but like w hat do i do if idk what i wanna do with my life!!! and if i go to community#college till i figure it out... i'll feel like A Failure cause my family has Expectations... hell I've had expectations...........#havin a fucking Crisis at almost 2am#and i dont rlly wanna tell anybody in my family that im kinda doubting what ive told them since fucking seventh grade abt my aspirations bc#they were So Impressed that i knew what i wanted to do at such a young age and stuck with it! and wow astrophysics sounds so complicated and#impressive!!!! it'd sure be a shame if you backed out of it after sticking with it for three entire years#jdoshdw when i went upstate i told my aunt that i was thinkin of geology maybe and i was like 'dont tell my mom please' like lmfao!!!! god#the mere IDEA of me attending college is stressing me out so much im fuckign five years old you fools!!!! im too young!!!!#delete later
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