#haven't posted in a while hello

[bluebirbbb]

warm dreams sweet dreams

[killerslowpoke]

02-09-23

[posi-pan]

you’d think since pansexual and asexual are consistently the top volunteered identities of queer survey participants who choose “other” for their sexuality, researchers would’ve stopped literally othering them as write-in identities and started providing them as options by now.

some studies note that they include pansexual and asexual as options due to the high number of “other” participants who wrote them in in the past but reading “most common write-ins are pansexual and asexual” in 2024 is super disheartening. just include them as options already!

[guiltyonsundays]

In defence of Will Ladislaw

George Eliot's characterisation of Will Ladislaw is one of the few aspects of Middlemarch that is not universally praised, with no less a person than Henry James commenting in 1873 that he lacked “sharpness of outline and depth of color”, making him the novel’s “only eminent failure.” And while Will's character is certainly not as clearly defined as some of the other characters in the novel, I believe that this was absolutely intentional on Eliot's part. Middlemarch is full to the brim of characters who believe they know exactly what they want—not least among them, our two protagonists, Dorothea Brooke and Tertius Lydgate, whose ardent ambitions and inflexible attitudes lead them into catastrophic errors of judgement and unhappy marriages.

By contrast, Will's lack of strongly defined goals and his changeability are almost his defining character traits. He's aimless and pliable, prone to rapid mood swings and drastic career changes, with even his physical features seeming to "chang[e] their form; his jaw looked sometimes large and sometimes small; and the little ripple in his nose was a preparation for metamorphosis. When he turned his head quickly his hair seemed to shake out light."

Will’s inscrutability is closely tied to his ambiguous status within the rigid class structure and xenophobic society of Victorian England, with his Polish ancestry and “rebellious blood on both sides” making him a target for suspicion. He is repeatedly aligned (and aligns himself) with oppressed, marginalised, and outcast populations—Jewish people, artists, and the poor.

He serves as a narrative foil for characters like Lydgate and Edward Casaubon, who prioritise specialist expertise above all and are consequently incapable of broad knowledge synthesis. He critiques Casaubon's life's work as being "thrown away, as so much English scholarship is, for want of knowing what is being done by the rest of the world." By contrast, Will serves as Eliot's defence of the value of a liberal education. One of the first things that we learn about him is that he declines to choose a vocation, and instead seeks to travel widely, experiencing diverse cultures and ways of life. He has broad tastes and interests, trying his hand at poetry and painting before eventually pursuing a career in politics.

He also functions as a narrative foil for Dorothea. Will is initially apathetic to politics, whereas Dorothea initially professes herself to be disinterested in art and beauty. This is perfectly encapsulated in their exchange in Rome, when Dorothea declares, "I should like to make life beautiful—I mean everybody's life. And then all this immense expense of art, that seems somehow to lie outside life and make it no better for the world, pains one", to which Will replies, "You might say the same of landscape, of poetry, of all refinement [...] The best piety is to enjoy—when you can [...] I suspect that you have some false belief in the virtues of misery, and want to make your life a martyrdom.”

By the end of the novel, Dorothea unlearns some of her puritanical suspicion of sensual pleasure, whereas Will becomes more serious, compassionate, and politically engaged, dedicating his life to the accomplishment of humane political reforms. They are both flawed individuals, who ultimately become more well rounded through their relationship with each other. Admittedly, Dorothea's influence on Will is more significant than his on her—and once again, I believe that this was intentional on Eliot's part.

In my opinion, the negative response to Will Ladislaw at the time of Middlemarch's publication (and in the centuries since) was and is profoundly informed by gendered expectations of masculine dominance in romantic relationships. Will's marriage to Dorothea has often been described as disappointing, with many readers and critics viewing the ambitious Lydgate as the embodiment of the ideal husband that Dorothea outlines at the beginning of the novel—a talented man engaged in important work for the betterment of humanity, to whom she can devote herself.

However, one of the central themes of the novel is that people are often mistaken in their beliefs about what they want, and Dorothea's marriage to Edward Casaubon certainly demonstrates that she would not in fact be happy living her life in submission to a man who does not respect her opinions. I firmly believe that Lydgate's misogynistic attitudes and expectations would have made it impossible for him to be happy in a marriage of equals with a woman like Dorothea. He is explicitly drawn to Rosamond Vincy because she has "just the kind of intelligence one would desire in a woman—polished, refined, docile."

By contrast, George Eliot made a deliberate choice to pair Dorothea with a man who is not ashamed to be influenced by her, and indeed looks up to her as his moral superior. Through Dorothea's influence, Will discovers his life's work. In turn, by marrying Will, Dorothea is able to pursue her true passion. As a result of their influence on each other, these come to mean the same thing—reform. Thus, George Eliot grants Dorothea Brooke a subversively feminist, politically progressive, and profoundly cathartic ending: a life of companionate marriage, sensual pleasure, and meaningful work, in which Dorothea can devote herself (within the limited means available to her as a woman in the 19th century) to the achievement of just and compassionate reforms that "make life beautiful" for everybody—herself included.

[sh0zuki]

No point to living if things aren't interesting

[reinnins]

happy new year!!

[beanghostprincess]

Sabo still struggles with memory loss. He had his childhood back, of course, he remembers Ace and Luffy and everything they did together. But he doesn't remember some stuff. Some anecdotes Luffy tells oh so excitedly? He can't recall that those happened. And if he does, it's all blurry and never at all like Luffy says. But he never says anything because that would break his brother's heart, to know his older brother isn't fully back with him, so he nods and smiles and pretends he knows what Luffy is talking about every time.

His room is filled with Post-it notes. Stupid, really. Dumb stuff. But he has all the meetings he needs to remember and the missions he has to do, along with everything he wants to write down at some point properly. The walls are covered in pictures of the people he loves (Luffy, Ace, Koala, Robin... All the others that have ever meant something to him because he refuses to forget somebody again).

He keeps writing dumb stuff down. Anything. He refuses to forget. He denies the possibility of doing it again.

But he forgets. Sabo keeps forgetting important dates. Important parts of his life, like his past with his brothers (he forgets a random adventure they had that he swore he had talked about the day prior) and crucial things he has to do. He has a hard time picturing his memories. Putting them in his brain. Turning them into images. Saying it's frustrating is a huge understatement.

Koala helps him out, of course. She's hard on him so he finishes his paperwork, but she knows it's difficult sometimes. She's his personal calendar and diary. She informs him of what he has to do during the week and always tries to talk and talk about anecdotes that she knows he still remembers but knows he loves to hear again.

His mental health isn't the best either, but he refuses to acknowledge it. There's a revolution at hand, he can't stop working. And fighting. And doing more and more and more. But sometimes it's just too much. Sometimes he goes into depressive episodes he can't control, and the medication is either addicting or the worst thing that has ever happened to him. Sometimes he's a bit too intense. Koala says he needs to calm down, that he has a problem with his fixation on the revolution and his past. Sabo keeps saying that it's fine. But he sometimes forgets or has blurry images of the fights and the people he has killed, filled with energy and excitement and like he has the power of a God. He doesn't like those. Enjoys the moment. Hates to forget it. Hates to know what he did during it too, even if it was for a good cause. Despises the look Koala gives him, also. Makes her promise not to tell Luffy about all of this.

But it's fine, he keeps saying. Sabo will keep trying to never forget anything ever again.

[varpusvaras]

Something was going on.

Fox could see it from the moment Breha walked into his room. She was trying too hard to look like nothing was wrong, but the expression on her face looked forced, like her skin had been painted over with hardened wax.

She walked over to his bed and sat down. Fox watched her every movement carefully, just waiting for her to open her mouth and say what it was. He watched as she breathed, laced her fingers together, and then decided otherwise and instead reached for Fox's hand, taking it into her own. Fox watched as she stroked her fingers over the back of his hand, slowly, gently, like she was trying to calm down both herself and him.

Fox couldn't take it anymore.

"What is it?" He asked. "Did something happen?"

He was suddenly very aware of the fact that it was only Breha in the room with him. Bail was still supposed to be on Alderaan. He had said that he didn't need to leave for another week. Why was he not here? Had something happened and-

"Bail is alright", Breha said, like she had just read all of his thoughts. "He is just outside the door, actually. We just thought that it was for the best if I came in first and explained this all a little bit first."

"Explained what?" Fox asked. Breha breathed in deeply again, and squeezed Fox's hand.

"I'm afraid we haven't been entirely truthful with you", she started, "please believe me when I say it wasn't because we didn't trust you, the situation was just very delicate, with your health and what is going on in the Galaxy now."

There were too many questions in Fox's mind now, none of which he knew how to ask out loud.

"But everybody is alright?" He asked. Breha smiled at him a little.

"Of course. We just want you to meet someone", she said. "Someone we haven't yet told you about."

She turned around, to look at the door.

"Bail, love", she called. "Come in."

Fox watched as Bail walked in, his eyes immeadiately finding the little body resting in his arms, and his heart jumped up to his throat.

"Fox", Breha said, as Bail stopped next to the bed. "This is Leia. Our daughter."

Fox stared. Stared at the baby in Bail's arms, tinier than even the smallest of Cadets Fox had ever seen, dark brown hair covering its head and its tiny hands grasping onto the front of Bail's shirt.

"I'm sorry we didn't tell you right away", Bail said, apologetic tone in his voice that Fox barely heard over the rushing of the blood in his ears. "The situation was...difficult. You needed to heal, even a little bit, and we didn't want to lie to you about her."

Fox finally managed to lift his eyes from the baby back to Bail and Breha, who were both looking at him with guarded eyes.

"Lie to me about what?" He asked. "This isn't...you didn't have to tell me anything, I'm just-"

"Fox", Breha interrupted him, before his spiralling thoughts could come rushing out of his mouth. "You are part of our family, just as she is. You deserve to know just as much, but we didn't want to stress you out with all of this, before we knew that you were stable enough. We trust you with this knowledge, just as much as we trust each other with it."

"I don't understand", Fox said. He really didn't. Bail and Breha had always talked about wanting a child, so much so that Fox had started to sometimes give himself a permission to want one too, to imagine what it would be like, with all three of them and a little one who would look up to him and call him buir. What more was there to know about that?

Breha squeezed his hands again.

"She is the daughter of Padmé Amidala and Anakin Skywalker", she said, leaving no room for any more questions in Fox's mind.

Fox looked at her. He looked at Bail and his somber eyes, and he looked back down at the baby, still fast asleep in Bail's arms.

There was still one question left, after all.

"Why did you tell me?" He asked. "I'm a breach in security, now. If they find me, they can make me talk."

"They can make me talk, just as easily", Bail said. "They can make Breha talk as well. You are part of our family. You deserve to know just as much as both of us do."

Fox looked at the baby. Leia. Her name was Leia.

It was-

He swallowed hard. There were still things he wanted to say, but he had lost the trust in his own voice.

There was a moment of silence between them, before Bail moved.

"Do you want to hold her?" He asked softly.

Fox looked up at him, and back to Leia.

She was so small. So very small and soft and delicate and important, and Fox wanted nothing more than to make sure that no one or no thing was ever going to hurt her, including himself.

"I-" He tried to say so, but there was something in his throat. "I, I can't, I-"

Have done some many horrible things. Have hurt so many innocent beings already. Have no idea how you can even ask me that.

"You can", Bail said. "I'm going to just lay her on your lap. You don't need much strength in your arms for that. It's alright."

His body had been the last thing Fox had been thinking about right then. The range of motion of his upper body had gotten a lot better recently, even if he still couldn't hold even his own weight up yet. The realisation of that made him feel better, actually. He was too broken to hurt anybody, even a little baby.

He looked at Leia, then up at Bail, and nodded.

Bail smiled, and carefully leaned over and carefully laid Leia's little body on Fox's lap and arms. She was so light Fox barely even felt her, but weighted more than all the stars in the universe.

Even though Bail had tried to be careful, as soon as he let go of Leia, her face scrunched up and her eyes, already darkened to brown, blinked up at Fox.

Fox expected her to cry. To scream. To want back to the warm safety of Bail's arms.

She didn't. She stayed quiet, staring up at Fox, and Fox could almost swear that he felt something tugging at his mind and heart.

Then her face shifted again, and she smiled at him, reaching her little hands towards Fox, and Fox-

Fox cried.

He didn't try to stop it. He just let the tears fall down his face and to his neck, and he let Breha wipe them away without a word.

"You know we don't expect anything from you", Breha said then. "It's entirely your choice to stay with us. But, if you want...she can be yours as well. She can be ours. If you want."

There was still something in Fox's throat, there were still tears running down his face, but he pushed past them to answer.

"Yes", he said. "Yes."

[beperoncin]

chat do you think he would say this

hi rockin,

[taminoamirfouad]

photographed by: charlie gray 2023 (x)

[feverflushed]

Feeding a whumpee is always such a sweet scenario.

A is so feverish and lethargic that they literally can't keep their head up. B is extremely worried, since A has skipped a few meals in a row.

So B sits on the edge of the mattress and carefully lifts up A's head. With gentle words and reassuring strokes, they manage to slip a few spoonfuls of broth through A's lips.

A is just so exhausted, they keep going cross eyed with the effort of staying awake, and B tries to talk to them through the whole ordeal, to keep them alert enough not to choke themselves on food.

As soon as A is done, they fall asleep straight away. B sighs, heartbroken. A doesn't look well at all, but at least now there's something  nourishing in their belly.

[heartbeetz]

I never got around to watching this movie when it came out so admittedly I don't know much about it but ngl I kinda want this guy I think.....

[time-speculo]

Bro this game's lore game is fucking iNsANE

[ace-aria-math]

a handful of minecraft movie concepts from the top of my head:

silent animated film (like Robot Dreams) about Steve exploring the world and defeating the dragon. the world is so beautiful but he is so lonely

half live action (for the real world) half animated (for the minecraft world) film about friends playing minecraft together to escape their troubles for a while. yeah it's been a harsh day but we can forget for a while as we build a castle together

film starring steve, alex, sunny, ari, makena, noor, efe, zuri, and kai. idk it'd just be neat to see all nine of them hanging out

movie about the people who came before the player and built all the mineshafts and strongholds and such. who were they

i just feel like we could do a lot better than minecraft flavored jumanji. you know what i mean

[thethirdamell]

Accursed Ones

Fandom: Dragon Age Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings Additional Tags: Blood Magic, Dark, Horror, Angst, Sexual Content Main Pairings (M/M): Anders / Amell, Anders / Hawke

Chapter Excerpt:

The Minanter ran red with the blood of mages as apostates fled in all directions, seeking asylum. Ferelden was the first to offer it. Weak and ravaged by war, Ferelden relied on the Frostback Mountains for safety should the Divine send soldiers seeking retribution. The Venatori followed, mages from the Tevinter Imperium, offering apostates citizenship in exchange for indentured servitude. Those that remained were sent to Ansburg, and to Anders.

Read More | Start From the End of DA2 | Start From Awakening | Join the Discord

[ask-my-memoir]