#haven't decided yet if i'll go back and do more of a rewatch/in order thing

[daynascullys]

castle & beckett being castle & beckett [1/?] ⤷ 3.12 — “Poof, You're Dead”

[piedoesnotequalpi]

🍄❄️🌿 if you want!! - @pigeonwit

(Writer ask game!)

🍄 (how did you get into writing fanfiction?)

This has...three answers, depending on how far back you want to go.

Answer 1: The first fanfiction I wrote was a cursed but hilarious Shakespeare mega-crossover that I've contemplated posting here based on a writing prompt on a sophomore year English final. I then proceeded to not write any more fanfiction (except for my Broadchurch-inspired poetry in creative writing), until...

Answer 2: At the beginning of the pandemic, I was rewatching Parks and Rec and was curious how, at one point, Ben knew about Leslie's favorite spot in City Hall. I wrote a short one-shot with my thoughts, made an AO3 account to post it, and thought I'd never use the account to post anything else, until...

Answer 3: A few months after I first watched Newsies, I thought I could fit the Newsies characters into a Much Ado About Nothing retelling pretty well--Javid as Ben and Bea, Spot and Race as Claudio and Hero, Katherine as Don Pedro, etc. My irl friend encouraged me to write it and helped with some plot stuff (Jack dressing up as Rapunzel was her idea if I remember correctly). I thought I wouldn't write anything else after that, but then I had ideas for one-shots and was kind of in a bad place mentally, so I kept going, and now here I am >140k words into the Bachelorette AU! What a time!

❄ (What's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?)

I thought about this in the shower, and I think I'd like to see a whodunit/murder mystery fic, which seems like the sort of thing @jack-kellys would be good at. I know I certainly would not be up to writing a proper murder mystery though (despite taking an entire English class on detective fiction in high school).

(Last answer under the cut because this got long, oops)

🌿 (give some advice on writer's block and low creativity)

I know I maintain the illusion of avoiding writer's block by having a semi-regular posting schedule for the Bachelorette AU, but I am very much not immune to writer's block. Here are some things I do, with the caveat that this is just my experience and my methods do not work for everyone.

If the block is coming from feeling like I'm not sure what I'm doing in the next few scenes, I'll take a bit to figure out and write down what the next few scenes will be. These won't be super detailed, but I'll sometimes specify the POV character and usually say "xyz happens." For example, right now I have notes in my bachelorette document about who's going in the hot seat when, as well as the scenes I want to have take place after the men tell all filming wraps.

If I'm just overwhelmed, I'll take a little longer and write a list of things, in order, that need to happen in a chapter (this is what I did for each chapter for the bachelorette au). In the Much Ado adaptation, I wrote down each scene number from the play and decided which POV(s) each scene would have and in what order, which served as a reminder of what each scene focused on.

If it's just that the words won't come, I look back over what I've read, go read a book, or I just sort of force myself to plod along (with the exception of these past couple weeks, where I've been really tired from work and haven't had much time to sit down and designate Writing Time). Brute-forcing isn't for everyone, but when I'm doing that, I try not to delete what I've written and I try not to think about whether it's good, since if I don't like the scene I can go back and edit or rewrite it later. I also do sprints sometimes.

After yet another abandoned novel attempt in 2022, I never skip ahead to the scene I really want to write. I'll write down single lines or bits of dialogue, but that's it. If I skip ahead, it makes it way harder to finish the fic.

[seaweedstarshine]

(@transmasc-rose , it's a sideblog but I haven't used my main in yeeeeears) I had a few more things to say so I figured I'd send an ask I stead of reblogging OPs post again ^^;

Yes I'm almost at 12!! I'm in s7b right now, last time I watched I got to s7e10 Journey to the Centre of the Tardis, and I've already seen Nightmare in Silver, so it's just a few episodes and the specials left. That's why it's been taking so long—I'm watching with Curtis and he doesn't want to let 11 go yet.

Also Vampire Science (half the ask turned I to this, oops): it's the second Eighth Doctor Adventure book, but most people (including me) suggest skipping the first one (the Eight Doctors) anyways, which is the written version of a recap episode and by book 2 the authors are already arguing about bits of it in the text. The time skip at the start of Vampire Science is just as jarring having read the first book, which /ends/ with him taking Sam as a companion.

One of the themes in the book is the Doctors manipulation of companions, drawing comparisons between Eight and Sam vs Seven and Ace, and how difficult it can be to tell when he's being honest.

At most I'd say watch the Eighth Doctor TV Movie first, which you can find on Archive . org if you haven't seen it already—its very silly/campy which is a fun contrast to Vampire Science's tone.

The best way I can describe the book is it feels like someones character analysis fanfic was made canon, which I mean positively.

Aaaaa Journey to the Center of the TARDIS is the Season 7b episode I rewatch most, except for the Of The Doctor trilogy, because of that manipulative Doctor iconicness “Don't get into a spaceship with a madman, didn't anyone ever teach you that? c:” Valiiid of him, Eleven owns my heart but Twelve's arc follows so smoothly off his and <3 lots of manipulation in Season 8!!!

I have seen the Eighth Doctor movie (though it has been a while…), ha the way the Eighth Doctor can be all over the place in terms of bounciness feels very Eleventh Doctor (my bias says), but because it’s so easy to take him anywhere from that movie (anywhere + amnesia), I’ve wondered if the audios + books + comics are consistent in characterization (only being familiar with audios to any extent)!

(I was trying to listen to his audios in order, so I listened to all the Main Range with Charley and C’rizz, but then I got to Lucie and I struggled getting into her, so I fell off. But then I decided to skip to River, so I hopped on ahead to Doom Coalition, but the Eleven got a little on my nerves, so I went back, and that most of my experience with the Eighth Doctor, barring a few other audio appearances.)

Ooh I've heard The Eight Doctors namedropped as some terrible book but now I understand why! Nice, nice, sweet it isn't important. Sadly I have a lot of trouble reading full books, or reading for an extent of time, so I looked up the audiobook and only found a fan-made one with a broken dropbox link!! I'll try and download a book and get through it very slowly as I do for books with lack of audiobooks!

It does sound extremely incredible, genuinely canon would be 100% improved if it was a lil more character analysis fic and a lil less explosions. (This is why I love The Day of the Doctor Novelization.) Eight manipulating people depicted as the Doctor's pattern, you love to see it. It's always the Best when it's the outwardly bouncier Doctors being deceitful <3

[suns-pott]

Losing my mind over the Jazz on the clock music video

So Luxiem's Jazz on the clock music video dropped almost a week ago, and I've noticed they've hidden some things in there. I haven't seen anyone solve it yet and I'm stuck so I'm looking to the internet for help and to compile what I've figured out so far. There's gonna be a million screenshots.

Plot

The plot is made clear to us through the various newspapers shown throughout the video.

Some of it is hard to read but I can make out the messages in order from top to bottom of the middle newspaper:

Lords are on alert.

Luxiem sent a notice to the lords.

Luxiem, a group of thieves causing havoc in the city, is the next target a lord?

A letter of warning sent to the lord.

And to the right I can make out the message:

A succession of security incidents

The number of riots continues to increase

Their news again. Luxiem. a group of thieves who target the mansions of aristocrats and steal their money and goods to give back to the common people.

And another newspaper that reads:

Luxiem, stealing the crown.

Last night Luxiem stole the crown at the clock tower.

Luxiem appears at the clock tower.

With all this we can say Luxiem are like a robin hood kind of group, stealing from rich and giving to the poor. And they decide to steal a crown at a clock tower which seems to be their biggest heist yet.

Hidden messages

There's some numbered sentences sprinkled throughout the video, I have no idea how many there are but the video ends with the number 10 so I think there's 10 of them?? The first newspaper that was shown above has a number one with the message: I wanna live free all the time. Keepin' it reals what we do. As for number 2...

The video starts with this morse code message.

I looked to the comments for people who know morse code and I found a comment by moon?!

So during Ike's first appearance in the video there's this text shown sideways.

2. But I can't do that in this city that has taken over.

Which member would win an arm wrestling competition? What did Mysta say? Go to that person.

The first Luxiem game show was hosted by Mysta some months ago, and I went back and checked who Mysta wrote would win an arm wrestling match, that being Luca. (This screenshot is cropped so none of the members are shown but Ike is on the left and Luca is on the right just believe me ok-)

There's a number 3 on the left with the text: But I can't do that in this city that has taken over. And on the right there's the message: Let's go to the top of the 636c6fb20746f776572.

Now I have no idea what the numbers are, I'm sure it's some kind of code out of the many different ones that exist. So I didn't solve it, I just found it bc of the number.

4. I don't want to see you cry anymore.

Again I have no idea what the jumble of letters and numbers mean but i found number 5 anyway and now that I type this out I am not smart enough to actually solve this-

5. So I take the crown. I'll cast a spell on you give you a taste.

So I'm not sure if there are more numbers, there probably is, but I've rewatched this goddamn video several times and I just don't know where to go from here. And now I'm screaming this into the void for help.

Also I have these and idk what to do with them, I'm sure they will be relevant later but it is 1 am and I am running on 4 hours of sleep already and I should probably sleep.

Miscellaneous

Anyways I'm gonna get some sleep now, thank you for reading this whole ass rant I have going on. I will get back to the regularly scheduled requests in a bit, summer school is kind of kicking my ass at the moment, and writer's block at the same time. I just need to get my ass moving.

[twdsunshine]

Hiiii 🖤 I hope you don't mind me asking (I'm not trying to be pushy or anything, just curious), do you have a plan for like, what's posting when or what order you're going to be working on things? Just wondering what's coming up that I need to watch out for 😂😂 I hope that's not rude to ask.

Heyyy, sweet Anon! Not rude at all, I promise 🖤 And, yes, I do have a rough plan of when I'm gonna be working on things, so I'll give you a quick run through it if that helps.

So, Blood & Magicks is obviously ongoing. I'm halfway through writing chapter 21 at the moment, so I'm well ahead, and just kinda dipping in and out of it as I get flashes of inspiration. It's such a long project that it's currently scheduled to finish on 7th May next year which is a little insane, so that will just keep posting on Sundays for the foreseeable future.

I've been working on Broken, which I have now decided will run to 12 parts instead of 10 because I have no self-control and it keeps getting away from me. I've just finished writing part 8 of that, so I have 4 parts left to go, and I'm pretty determined to get that finished over the next week or so. That series will wrap up on 18th April.

I then have 6 drabble requests waiting: 5 Daryl x Reader; 1 Rick x OFC. I'll probably crack on with those as soon I've finished writing Broken cos I don't like feeling like people are waiting on me. Luckily, they never take too long as they can be as long or short as I like really, and they don't require much of a plot or anything. Those will just be posted as I get them done.

After that, I have two main projects I want to start on - I'm currently not sure which I want to work on first. Whichever I choose will begin posting on 25th April, most likely.

- One is the third and final mini-series in my Prison AU trilogy (following on from In Dark Corners and Wide Open Spaces). It will be called The World At Our Feet. It's been years since I wrote about Lexi and Daryl, so I'm hoping people still care enough to want to know how their story ends.

- The other is a Negan mini-series called Little Miss, which will be based on the song Little Miss by Sugarland. I haven't really done much for Negan since I've reopened this blog, and I feel like there are a lot of followers here mainly for Negan content, but I'm just finding it a little hard to write him at the moment. I'm currently doing a series rewatch, so I'm hoping when I get to Season 7 I'll find my way with him again.

There's also a Supernatural mini-series idea that I've started to write called Along For The Ride, but that's taken a back seat at the moment cos I need to rewatch a couple of episodes before I feel confident to press on with it. So, that will be coming at some point, but I'm not sure when just yet.

Aaaaand I'll be working on one-shots as and when too. I finished one earlier this week called Choices, a Daryl x Reader which will be posting on 9th March. I have another Daryl one in the works called Ghost Of You which may well be the next one I finish so will post towards the end of March. Any others will depend on what sort of inspiration strikes or possibly new episodes from season 11 because I am loving that so far.

I mean, honestly, I have a document called Fic Ideas which has 9 ideas for series and/or mini-series outlined right now. One of them is an AU which I'm particularly excited about, but I think it may be a little out there for some people. Then I have 3 other WIPs outlined in more detail, or even started, that have been sitting in my drafts for a while or have been inspired by drabbles that I want to build into full stories.

So, yeah. That got a little long, but I am always so, so happy and excited to talk about what I'm working on and what's coming up. If anyone ever wants more info about my WIPs, just holler, cos it gives me so much motivation 😊 Thank you so much for asking!!

[morkhan]

Will Byers is Gay: The Evidence So Far

With the release of Stranger Things 3, there has been a lot of discussion kicked up about the character of Will Byers and his sexuality (or lack thereof). I've seen a lot of takes about what "it's not my fault you don't like girls" was intended to mean, many of which seem to take it in isolation, so I wanted to make a post putting it into what I think is its proper context; not an isolated incident, but the latest carriage in veritable train of queer themed language and imagery that has followed Will Byers since episode one of season one, and before that. You ready? Alright, let's go.

Season Zero: the Montauk Files

Before Stranger Things became Stranger Things, it was called Montauk. Like many would-be show makers, the Duffer Bros put together a "show bible" describing the premise, setting, tone, and characters of the show they intended to make. Like many shows, a lot of these ideas changed or were lost on their way to the screen, but it's always worth looking into their original concepts. Here is their description of Will Byers in the Montauk show bible:

Obviously, the major whammy there is in the first line "sexual identity issues." But there are some other interesting notes, like his "colorful clothes" that you might want to keep a lookout for on your next rewatch. Now, onto...

Season 1

The thing to pay attention to regarding Will in season 1 is in the language used to refer to him when he is not present (which he isn't for most of the season).

Episode 1: the subject of bullying comes up right away in the conversation between Joyce and Hopper. "The kids, they're mean. They laugh at him, laugh at his clothes, call him names." "What's wrong with his clothes?" "I don't know!" This harkens back to the Montauk show bible, but it's arguable, since it's never made clear what about his clothes draws ire.

She also mentions that he is "sensitive," "not like most," and that his dad said he was "queer" and called him a "fag." Hopper asks "is he?" to which she replies "He's missing is what he is!"

Episode 3: Troy says he's not missing, he's dead. "Probably killed by some other queer."

Episode 4: Troy, again "Will's in fairyland, flying around with all the other little fairies, all happy and gay."

Sensitive, queer, fag, fairy, and gay are all used to describe Will in season 1, but perhaps more notable is the fact that they aren't used to describe anyone else. If the show were truly period accurate, let's be real; the whole party would've been called queers on a pretty regular basis, because "queer" doubled as a generic insult back then. But in season 1, these words are only ever used in relation to Will, with one exception; in episode 6, Steve says to Will's brother, "I used to think you were queer." So it's not even an active accusation in that moment; it's used in the negative.

Hell, Troy walked up to Lucas mockingly proposing to Mike and proclaiming his love for him, and he still didn't call them queers. That language is reserved for Will.

Now granted, most of these are used as insults by characters who don't like Will, but still; as a writer, if you want your audience to remember something, repetition is an excellent way to embed it in their minds. There's a reason for the specificity of language surrounding Will, and a reason that language keeps coming up over and over and over again.

Season 2

Season 2 retires much of the homophobic language used to insult Will, replacing it with "Zombie Boy." The only homophobic language used in season 2 is the word "faggot," used by Billy's father to refer to Billy, who expresses a clear interest in women (and an arguable interest in one particular man, but that's the subject of another post).

Still, there is an arguable bit of queer theming in Will's conversation with Jonathan regarding the benefits of being a "freak" and how normal people never accomplish anything. Jonathan even invokes bisexual icon David Bowie to make Will feel better about his "freakishness."

The clearest piece of queer theming for Will in season 2 comes in episode 8, in this beautiful speech from Joyce to Possessed Will:

"When you turned eight, I gave you that huge box of crayons, do you remember that? It was 120 colors. And all your friends got you Star Wars toys, but all you wanted to do was draw with all your new colors. And you drew this big spaceship, but it wasn't from a movie. It was YOUR spaceship; a RAINBOW Ship, that's what you called it. And you, you must have used every color in the box. I took that with me to Melvald's, and I put it up. I told everyone who came in, 'My son drew this.' And you were so embarrassed, but I was so proud. I was so, so proud."

This is one of the most powerful memories of her son that Joyce has, an image so strong and distinct that she uses it to invoke his true identity against the monster that is slowly subsuming him. She notes very specifically that it's not something he copied, but something that came entirely from Will himself, an image that she felt represented him so perfectly that she took it with her to work and proudly touted it as his to everyone she knew. The Rainbow Ship is Joyce's picture of her son's very heart, and surely I don't need to explain to you how powerful a piece of queer imagery the rainbow is.

Some subtextual stuff; in episode 9, when the girl asks Will to dance, he stammers "I... I don't..." and only goes to dance with her when Mike literally pushes him towards her.

During the final montage, the scene cuts to different characters in time with appropriate lines from the song: "every move you make" cuts to Mike and El (as he is teaching her to dance), "every vow you break" cuts to Nancy dancing with Dustin (as she technically cheated on Steve with Jonathan), "I'll be watching you" cuts to Lucas dancing with Max (as she has playfully called him 'stalker' all season). What line cuts to Will? "Every smile you fake," specifically on the word fake, while Will dances with a girl wearing this expression:

That is not a real smile, that is not a comfortable boy, and that is not an accident; Noah Schnapp is one of the best actors in the entire show, and of the young boys, he is the one the Duffers trust most to do dramatic heavy lifting.

Do you want it to be a little more explicit? Okay, here is that scene in the script:

I mean, that pretty much speaks for itself. It's less explicit in the actual show, but it's still there, you know?

Season 3

And now, the biggest and most explicit thing to date; The Scene. I mean, you could discuss the obvious subtext in the simple fact that Will is the only male main character who has yet to find a girlfriend or express any interest in girls whatsoever, but that pales in comparison to The Scene.

The setup for The Scene is pretty simple; after declaring "a day free of girls" in order to get his friends to run the D&D campaign he's probably spent a significant amount of time creating, his friends have blown him off to continue bemoaning their girl troubles, so Will has decided to leave. Mike, realizing too late that he has genuinely upset his friend, chases after him to try and get him to come back.

A back-and-forth argument ensues, where Will accuses Mike of ruining the party and abandoning his friends in favor of girls, and Mike, in the heat of the moment, responds with "It's not my fault you don't like girls!" After which, everything stops. There is a full second of silence, and a close up on Noah Schnapp's face so you can take in his reaction.

There is a lot to unpack here. Now, acting is up to interpretation to a degree, but to me, that expression conveys two primary emotions; shock, and betrayal. That face says "how could you?" Because here's the thing; regardless of what Mike does or doesn't know about Will's sexuality, Mike knows for a fact that Will has been called a queer all his life by everyone from his school bullies to his own fucking dirtbag father. By invoking even the specter of that, Mike has crossed a fucking line, and he knows it. And we know he knows it, because he immediately backtracks and tries to mitigate the damage. But it's too late. The damage has been done.

I also think there is a tinge of fear in that image. Just a moment of soul raking panic that pretty much every closeted queer person knows intimately. It's very brief. But I think it's there, if you look.

This scene sends Will into an emotional tailspin that culminates in him tearing down the literal last bastion of his childhood in a fit of sorrow and rage. His innocence has been destroyed. He cannot regain what he has lost, and he can never go back to the way things were before. This is the emotional climax of his arc for season three. It's a powerful one-- shame it comes in the third of eight episodes, but that's neither here nor there.

And that's pretty much it for now. Any one of these things taken in isolation could be very easily dismissed, but here's the thing; they aren't isolated incidents. They are part of a clear and consistent pattern, one that goes all the way back to the show's inception, before even one minute of footage was filmed. And this pattern points to one very obvious conclusion; the Duffer Brothers have always intended, and continue to intend, for Will Byers to be gay.

Now, for the obvious question; why haven't they made it explicit yet?

The answer is as unfortunate as it is obvious; I don't know.

It's entirely possible that there is some external force that the Duffers have to answer to that is preventing them from actively pursuing this particular storyline. This happens all the time in Hollywood, and it could be anything from Netflix to Noah Schnapp's parents to Noah Schnapp himself just being uncomfortable with it. Many are the creators who dream Big Gay Dreams only to run into the horrors of our Forced Hetero Reality. If the Duffers ultimately submit to these pressures, I hope you won't be too hard on them. This shit is harder than you think to get to the screen sometimes.

But it's also possible that they just aren't ready for it yet. That they have been saving this for a future storyline, that they just want their characters (and the actors) to get a little older before they pursue this particular storyline explicitly, but they've been busily laying groundwork for it so that anyone paying attention will know it's coming.

I don't know. Only time will tell for sure.

For now, I can tell you this; I see a great deal of evidence that the Duffers still intend for Will to be gay, and precisely zero that they have changed their minds.

I hope that holds true.

[cliquestitsandicks]

Tracking Kat

Episode 1: Kat is mourning the end of her relationship with Adena. It has been 5 weeks since the breakup in Paris. She's still looking at old pictures of them and posted one. She still hasn't sent Adena's equipment to her, even though Adena has been texting her asking for it. By the end of the episode, she's admitted to (in order) Alex, Patrick, and Jane & Sutton that she is not okay. She is still sad about the end of her relationship. Alex tells her "you're so hard on yourself. You got your heart broken. There's no expiration date on heartbreak. You move on when you're ready to move on and when you *are* ready, you will find someone amazing. Someone who will never leave." Then Patrick is an entitled, invasive dick. She told her girls she wasn't ready for it to be real yet and that's why she hadn't told them... but she broke down in front of them. She'd finally accepted it was over. End of the episode, she makes an instagram post exposing her vulnerability to the world and packs up Adena's things for good.

Episode 2: Kat injects Jane for fertility treatment. She is very familiar with Jane's reproductive system at this point - best friends. She learns the Wild Susan, a club Adena took her to that became a safe space she frequents and which happens to be 1 of only TWO lesbian bars in the city, is closing. She learns the only reason it's happening is because developers want to gentrify the neighborhood. We learn Kat has a lawyer (not sure how that may come up later) that she met through the #BeReal campaign. Anyway, Kat throws a queer prom as a fundraiser to help save the Wild Susan. It ultimately fails because $42,000 in one night from poor people is a bit much. But it was a valiant effort and, as Kat learns, the gentrifiers were well aware of its impossibility. This episode is leading up to her political career. "I've been so into my feelings lately, it feels really good to challenge my energy into something that really matters". I am so proud of Kat. In Season 1, I would have worried she was avoiding her feelings, but the writers made a big deal of showing she's done the exact opposite of that in the prior episode.

Episode 3: Kat has been researching councilman Reynolds and he's a total piece of shit - helping gentrifiers, cutting funding to parks, and voting against paid maternity leave. She's fired up. Our girl is P A S S I O N A T E & informed! We meet the councilwoman for whom she plans to volunteer and her campaign manager, Tia. Tia's a tiny, bubbly boss with natural hair and a bright smile and we see Kat brighten up. We later learn she and Kat have more in common, both being NYU grads (actually overlapping while there) and both brilliant. Tia, however, is not from a wealthy and connected background. In their initial meeting, Kat tells Tia "I'm just looking for something to channel my rage and depression". Kat enlists her besties to help get the councilwoman to unseat problematic Reynolds. Sutton clearly sees something between Kat and Tia because she does a friend's background check (checking the social media) and tells Kat she looks very single to which Kat responds "it really doesn't matter because I'm still getting over Adena" and Jane seems skeptical of Kat's protestations with her silent smirk. We learn Kat has really soft lips. Kat is the voice of reason for Alex, being the first one to acknowledge the hypersexual "dangerous" Black man depiction that will likely be projected onto him if he admits he is the man in his friend's story. Then we see her naturally command the crowd at the rally. Again, I am so proud of Kat. She isn't holding back when she knows she should speak up. She's taking control of her narrative. She's fighting for what's right in a constructive manner. And now Tia, who has way more experience with this than Kat, is recommending she run for office.

Episode 4: We start the episode with Kat describing what would be her district and job description to her best friends. She's looking excited about the potential to do something that matters and really help people. In her conversation with the Toby (?. don't know, don't care), we get to see more of Tia being supportive of Kat and Kat being confronted with whether she's motivated to actually run or just wants someone to beat Reynolds. We learn Kat had an abortion in 2013 when she was 20 AS IS HER GOTDAMN RIGHT BECAUSE IT'S HER BODY, but it's something she's felt some sort of shame/concern over seeing as nobody close to her knew about it. Then, and this is so great, after telling her friends she has the conversation with Tia. Tia shares that she's had one as well and completely understands not wanting it to be public knowledge, but in sharing her experience educates Kat on yet another way vulnerable people are having their rights stripped, this time through manipulation and "crisis centers" that shouldn't exist. Tia remains supportive and doesn't pressure Kat at all with her decision. "I am by your side if they come for you, but you gotta do what's right for you". When we get that great speech from Jacqueline we see Kat being moved my the statement that you'll never know what you're capable of if you don't take a leap faith to face challenges that frighten you, then you'll never know what you're capable of. [i'd like to pause right now to say Jacqueline is fucking wonderful and i love her like my white auntie. also Sutton needed to hear that again just as much as Kat and i really appreciate this entire moment.] When Kat leaves Jacqueline's celebration, she passes by one of those "crisis centers" Tia told her about and decides to use her voice to help others. "I like to think of myself as a pretty strong, empowered, forward-thinking, open-minded woman. But, up until now, I haven't been able to talk about my abortion. If me putting myself out there helps even one woman to feel less alone, less ashamed, and less guilty then it's worth it." And just like us, dear Tia is blown away. She actually exhales a breath she didn't know she was holding and biiiiiiiitch (!!!! excitedly). and then they're dancing! This is the episode, upon rewatch, when i recognize how often Tia touches Kat unnecessarily.

Episode 5: Kat's entire recap includes Tia, ending with Sutton saying "she seems to be very single". Her very first scene, Tia is complimenting her walking out of some campaigning event we later learn was a Town Hall. Can we just talk about Kat's blazer for a second? First of all, i want it. Second, how did they find something so perfectly her? It's colorful but still semi-professional, fun, but still about her business. Heart-eye inducing. ok. So the next time we see Kat, she and Tia (whose last name they finally mention as Clayton) are reviewing campaign platform and doing debate prep at Kat's apartment. Tia's complimenting Kat almost continuously at this point. Clearly she's impressed, borderline gushing. and Kat tries to brush it off. Tia's not letting her. And there's this moment when Tia forces herself to break eye contact with her (around 5:40 of the episode). The show tells us Kat still hasn't dated since Adena, but Sutton brings up the "stupid smile" she gets whenever Tia's mentioned. She's making better decisions than Patrick and her being compared to Patrick is lowkey happening a lot. I'm starting to wonder if they're setting up Kat taking over digital if she doesn't win the campaign. Ok, the song choice as they pan to Kat and Tia... "I never normally check my phone 10 times in a minute. I'm not the girl to be kept on hold 10 miles from the finish." Again, Tia is very touchy with Kat, never anything inappropriate of course, but the hand is always on the back or the arm. and their interaction is just.. lovely. I squeal. it's so cute. they're so comfortable. Kat invites Tia to the dinner BEFORE (i got the timing on that mixed up before) Tia says she's "a boring straight girl" [the test determined that was a LIE... nah, my good sis Tia is dealing with some internalized homophobia which is no joking matter, but we don't learn that until the next episode]. Apparently, Kat can cook now? So she just liked Adena's food better i guess? idk... anyway. I get why some of the things Tia said can be taken as flirting, but i still believe that you accept what someone says is their sexuality until they say otherwise. yes, that's even when they're saying things like "when i see what i want, i go for it" and "Annndd she can cook. it's hot" and looking at you like that. Kat telling Jane to apologize because he's her boss and she got suuuper disrespectful and would absolutely deserve getting fired makes me proud. She's the mature friend now. She's the one with a level head on her shoulders. Kat finally makes her feelings known to Tia, but this is after Tia has already stated she's straight. Tia reiterates that this is a professional relationship and apologizes for Kat getting the wrong idea. I'm reminded of when Alex Danvers told Maggie Sawyer she was into her and she was rejected... but in that example i was floored and heartbroken for Alex because ugh, i just didn't see that coming. With this, however, it felt like Tia was clear in her words even if it shocked the hell out of me what the words were. So i didn't feel heartbroken for Kat. I thought... tbh... she brought it on herself for refusing to respect Tia's "no", however soft it was. But the writers did let us know it wasn't over with the music selection... Kat looking at "You and Tia make a great team :)" as "I'll go to war for you" plays.

Episode 6: All the emails have been released and Kat has no worries at all about that because she's a professional. And we get to see her be a boss addressing the entire group. Patrick isn't there this episode (YAY for our sanity!) and i think Kat being a boss so often when Patrick isn't around is intentional. When we see Tia, she says last night is forgotten but she thinks it's a bad idea to remain Kat's campaign manager... which is clearly a hard rejection. One can argue that it's too harsh for someone merely admitting they were into you. But it's just as easy to argue that it's appropriate after telling someone, very clearly, that you are not into them romantically and them ignoring that and saying that you were flirting with them on this date they never called a date before you were already there?? so i'm not mad at it. At the end of the episode, we find out that Tia was rejecting herself, not Kat. Turns out, Ms. Tia Clayton has known she's attracted to women since she was in high school, but she "didn't want to want it". Tia is so TINY AND ANXIOUS ABOUT HER SEXUALITY AND MANY OF US HAVE BEEN THERE. But... and i say this in jest... for someone who is really trying not to be out in the open with her gay, she sure was comfortable kissing Kat all outdoors for anyone to see. My good sis is smitten. I'm excited for the story. Again with the music during their scenes though... "I cannot fallll in love with youuuuu. I cannot feeeeel this way so soon, so soon." Also, my girlfriend and I have watched the gifset of the kiss over the phone and swooned (we live in different states for now). This episode, we also got the flashbacks (i missed Lauren so much). Kat's got red streaks in her hair, is a friend to strangers, has regrettable sex with men who taste like pickles, and is cute as a button. She also called Jacqueline "Mama Jackie" and that's it; that's her name now.