#have you SEEN the effort going into this??? the budget????? the love?? the PASSION????

[narwhalandchill]

sometimes genshin will be doing its gacha thing and or some other general annoying non gacha cringe and it sucks and theres a snoozefest patch and writing that falls short of its full potential and shoddy QoL and an underutilized combat system and when its like that its easy to be all ha ha shit game fuck this company i dont owe em shit but then u sit on it a while calm down and eventually go back to like. the chasm nail and just. listen to that haunting fucking OST and remember how ur breath caught and heart skipped when u discovered it the first time with that same melody kicking in gear only to drill that sucker punch of a wonder in further so that ur stuck helplessly left staring at the scene in front of u for minutes and minutes just. lost in that ambience . And try to remember the last time a video game has so effortlessly managed to instill this completely indescribable feeling in you (on MULTIPLE occasions) and absorb you into this world crafted with so much love and careful attention radiating from its every pore and its like. yeah yeah i know i know . why ive stuck with it all this time . why im most likely not quitting until EoS

[just-prime]

I'm not sure if you've been watching The Acolyte, but my critically high levels of sodium over the Ahsoka series have returned with the revelation that Rosario must have fought Lucasfilm over fight/lightsaber training stipulating in her contract.

Manny Jacinto, who came to the role with a black belt in Tae Kwon Do trained for four months for his fight scenes before filming. Rosario repeatedly said in interviews that she trained for two hours a day while filming, and it was clear that she thought this was a lot.

I tried to write it off last year. Budget and time constraints, George Lucas overspent and Disney is doing things differently, the prequel era is dead-

No.

No, this is not the case.

Prequel era love and care in the arena of bringing characters who are expert sword wielders and martial artists to life is alive and well at Lucasfilm.

Daphne Keen fights like Ahsoka plucked from the middle of the Clone Wars and brought to life. Dean Charles Chapman's saberwork is a beautiful hybrid of Obi-wan and Anakin with lightning fast, graceful Soresu and saber spins, lightsabers are deadly once more and used in ways we haven't seen outside of animation and video games, and characters far, far older than 11 ABY Ahsoka have kinetic, energetic choreography because a 42 year old Jedi is nowhere near over the hill, and I'm done with being gaslit about her age.

There are many issues with this show, yes, but there are no cameos (save for one blink and you miss it), no name dropping to make the audience tear up and feel something based on the hard work of previous content. Nuggets are plucked from the EU and made fresh, like the delightful and creative use of cortosis. New force worshipping sects with their own beliefs are brought to life without being the Nightsisters. The galaxy feels large again.

It's everything Ahsoka wasn't and shows just how soulless an effort that show was. Ironically this is the show that's getting raked over the coals while nearly all criticism of Ahsoka was met with dismissal despite the show being desperately mediocre.

If you had asked me to go in without behind the scenes knowledge and tell you if Filoni or Headland was the one new to Star Wars and who was approaching this effort with genuine love of the material and passion for world building and adventure, it wouldn't be the guy who was recently made Creative Director.

I'm sorry for once again paragliding into your inbox (yes, this is the salty anon from last summer lol), especially if you aren't interested in The Acolyte, but it just sheds so much light on everything wrong with Ahsoka and how valid our criticisms were. Salt doesn't have an expiration date, so I hope this is a little bit of vindication!

Hello, hello! Hang up your paraglider, you're always welcome in my ask box.

I have been watching the Acolyte! I'll admit, I saved off answering this until the final ep had come out so that if there were any more cool fight scenes, they were not missed in my response.

Thoughts I had Pre Finale

All in all I agree completely.

While flawed (personally I feel like the acting on Osha and Mea is the weakest part of the show as a whole, as well as the fact that this very much felt like a movie idea stretched into a tv show) the Acolyte has been legions better than the previous slop that Disney Star Wars has put out recently. You know why? Because I had fucking fun watching it. Sure, afterwards I'd usually say something along the lines of 'wow the pacing is a bit weird' but all in all? Actively enjoyable. It never made me angrily close the D+ tab mid episode.

It's also been a facinating litmus test for what people are able to be chill about Star Wars and which ones are not able to handle it. The amount of reviewers and reactors whom I previously had massive respect for who just are acting like utter tools is really getting on my nerves.

Because in sooooo many ways this has been exactly what people have been asking for. A new perspective, with new ideas that isn't just focused on the Skywalker saga. And on top of that, holy fuck the fights are glorious. You are absolutely right, both Dafne Keen's and Tommon's fights prove just how well you can have lightsaber skills look from a single person, as well as the Wookie fight showing off some truly impressive choreo between the three.

And then you have Manny Jacinto...hello ARMS

The man is by far the standout joy of the series (followed closely by Sol) as the man just oozes charisma. His big fight against everyone was brutal and I'm glad to see that lightsabers are once again deadly in the Star Wars universe. Watching him mow through a legion of Jedi was so incredibly satisfying to watch, and again he is just knocking it out of the park with the choreo. LOVE the way that they've introduced cortosis into live action, especially in a fighting style. Headbutting a lightsaber was fucking amazing to witness. Though it's actually not the first time that it's appeared in Canon star wars, as it appears in the second canon Thrawn book, Thrawn : Alliances!

The exploration of the Dark Side is being done in such an interesting way, because none of the practitioners we've seen would self identify as 'dark side users' at all. Because sure, you have Manny Jacinto who is out being evil because the Jedi were going to label him as dark side either way so he might as well defend himself, for him it's just the way he connects with the Force. But you also have the witches, who's mind infiltration is certainly Dark Side, but are just out here living their best witchy lives. They live by their Thread, regardless of what the Jedi would call it.

As always, also the "the jedi need to be the coolest and the morally purest people in the whole wide world" people are having hissy fits, which is just like...no? Stop being allergic to nuance? We've seen time and time again how the Jedi were in fact a child taking cult (yes, yes they are, if you disagree i'd recommend going and rewatching TPM which spells it out pretty clearly) usually we've just been on the Jedi's POV so it seems justified. The Sol flashback episode I think shows off this mentality very well. He had good intentions, sure, but all in all, he wants to take and even Trinity calls him on it. It's a fascinating examination of what decades later would lead Anakin down a path of desperation.

Speaking of Anakin...People getting suuuuuper protective over Anakin's super special status as 'the chosen one' was also rather surreal to witness. Personally, I don't see how this invalidates his 'the chosen one' in the first place? But people were definitely scraping the bottom of the barrel for things to complain about, as opposed to offering actually constructive criticism, of which there are plenty of options.

Thoughts I had Post Finale

All in all, nothing really changed for me, as usual, the pacing was absolutely fucked and the action was absolutely incredible, and in the end, I enjoyed the experience of watching it.

I certainly appreciate seeing more of the Jedi actively covering shit up, both in little ways as well in big ways.

Also *waves* Hi Plagueis!

My main little gripe

I really don't get why they needed to actively tie Mr. Darth Hotpants over here to Venesta specifically? I get the want to connect him to an established character, it just rang a little hollow for me. I think I'd have preferred it if he was just a rando youngling who never even got to being a Padawan cuz the Jedi kept trying to basically de-dark side him ala grade schools punishing for being left handed. Donno, I just think that would have been a bit more compelling.

My main BIG gripe

Why...THE FUCK...did they split up??? They burned waaaay more time having their little heart to heart then had it been all three of them fucking booking it to the ship. I just don't get it. I don't get why Mae or Osha would want to leave each other again, and I don't get why Manny Jacinto would willingly give up an additional fighter. I get the whole "There can only be two" bit, but A) Plagueis is already there on the island, so Osha makes it three and B) Osha's probably going to be more motivated with a little living reminder of the Jedi's lies being right there and present and C) Osha and Mae are both so fucking powerful why would anyone just let one half of the pair walk away????

It just didn't fit with any of the character's previous actions so it annoys me.

Kinda ended as I began, relatively neutral on it all. Think if pressed would give it a 7/10 just because the action was SO FUCKING GOOD, otherwise it would probably be lower due to the rather painful pacing issues and the meh acting on display from Amandla Stenberg which was just such a huge shame cuz I know she's got more range than this.

Mainly, I just really really hope future shows take from this just how good lightsaber combat can be when you have properly trained performers. THIS should be the standards, and it's painful that its not.

As always thank you for dropping into my ask box! You always give me so much to work with it's a joy to respond :D

[draculasstrawhat]

Just seen a joke post about “bitter lonely men” not understanding that women don’t love men as like, wise benevolent providers, or with admiration - and I get I was the set up for a fond joke, so I’m not interacting directly because that wasn’t the point.

But it touches on something. The thing is, plenty of women *do* love their male partners with admiration, or as wise, benevolent providers. The thing that bitter, lonely, heterosexual me don’t get is that to be loved admiringly, you have to *be* admirable. To have someone adore you as a benevolent provider - you not only have to provide, you have to be benevolent!

Like, the admiration thing. I know some women who think their husbands hung the stars - and that’s because, without exception, their husbands are wise, kind, funny, gentle, generous men. They are men who are honest, and trustworthy, who do important work(paid or otherwise), are great with the kids, and understand what their wives are dealing with on the daily. They are men who (generally) make an effort with their appearance, or who are interesting and passionate, or who are just… lovely, you know?

If you want your partner to love you that way, then you’ve got to emulate the behaviour of the people they admire. If you act like their hopeless, directionless, little brother, then they’re going to love you the way they love a hopeless, directionless little brother: with a degree of exasperation and condescension. If treat everyone meanly, and grudgingly, and in an embittered sort of way, then their love for you is going to reflect that.

So make an effort. Stop thinking that kindness makes you a simp or that personal hygiene makes you gay. Get your living space, and your finances, and your social behaviour in order. Get a job that doesn’t make you feel like hell every second, and if you can’t, then build a social sphere that makes you feel alive and supported. Give money to charity, if you can afford it, but don’t brag about it. Help strangers with little things, and do it cheerfully. Get a hobby that brings you joy and build expertise in it - and be supportive of newcomers. Volunteer with a good cause, if you possibly can. Be the sort of person that - not just your spouse - but a disinterested stranger will look at, and say, “Wow, he seems like a really decent, together sort of guy.”

I’m not guaranteeing that will land you a woman who thinks your feet don’t touch clay, or that you won’t get your heart broken. But it vastly improves your chances in that sphere, while likely improving every other aspect of your life.

Then, to the provider thing…

Do you actually want to be a provider? I mean, it’s really expensive.

And if you choose it, you have to know what it entails.

If you want a SAH spouse who is financially dependent on you, then you cannot say that with one breath while complaining about women “sponging,” or being “greedy”, or “nags”, with the next.

If you want to be the only earner in a household, then you have to stop seeing the money as “mine”, but rather, “ours”, and have a reasonable recognition of how it covers the living expenses of two people in the lifestyle you hope to have. If you expect your life to continue much as before, and for your wife to get by, “barefoot and pregnant” on an absolute pittance, then be aware you’re not going to get a lot of sign ups. (Children are also a whole other person being carried by that budget.)

There is no genuine past where women, en masse, lived passively in that situation. It was always considered shitty and irresponsible to leave your wife destitute when you had a decent income. If you’re hoping to do that to a woman, then don’t expect her to be grateful - you’re not a benevolent provider! You’re an exploitative employer.

When you don’t have a decent income, then you’re going to be poor. Stretching a budget moderate budget over two (or more if there are kids) makes things tight. If you’re both happy with that, fine, but you *both* have to bear the costs of it, and be aware that it will cause arguments.

Also, be honest about what you want: do you want a SAH wife and mother, who does the cooking and the cleaning? Then you have to recognise that those things are WORK, and she’s going to end her day just as wiped and stressed as you are - especially if you’re working on a straightened budget.

If your retort to this is, “well, my mum/gran managed just fine…” Actually, there is no guarantee that she did. There’s a whole body of work about how exactly Not-Fine middle class women of the 50s-80s were doing. Besides which, the financial and social circumstances were wildly different - I don’t just mean house prices. It’s not okay to leave prams in the back garden any more, or let young children roam the streets. It’s really hard to get a lot of housework done with children underfoot.

Also, if you want your house to be spotless, are you *helping*? Even if we’re talking about an extremely gendered division of labour, are you fitting shelves, and fixing taps, and keeping the paintwork fresh, and repairing the car, and doing the garden? Or are you prepared to pay someone to do those jobs?

You can’t keep a house even presentable without those underlying jobs being done, without their being enough furniture, enough storage, enough structural maintenance. Every couple I know who has done the distance and been happy in with a “traditional marriage” has been a) a lot older than me, and b) the guy has been really handy. Like, proper DIY genius.

Is that a skillset you have?

Because “keeping house” is hard graft, especially when you have kids, and you’re both going to be frazzled and exhausted by it. Neither of you will look like you did when you were dating.And if you want your wife to be bouncy and grateful for all the work you’re putting in, then you need to be grateful and supportive of all the work she is putting in - and not expect the impossible. You’re a partnership - and if you treat it like one, genuinely, you will both be glad of, and grateful to each other.

Or does that all sound too messy and stressful? Instead, do you want a perfectly turned out trophy wife, with flawless hair and nails, who never gains weight?

Well, I hope you’re earning enough to pay for her cosmetics, as well as a cleaner, and a gardener, and childcare, and gym membership, and whatever mad diet she’s on. If her job is to look beautiful for you, and she’s not got an external income, then you are her employer in this, okay?

“That sounds expensive!”

THAT IS EXPENSIVE. It’s why that particular lifestyle wasn’t available to the vast majority of people in recorded history. Having a spouse who didn’t have to do *any* labour, but could instead spend money on sitting around looking beautiful, was the most enormous status symbol FOR A REASON.

Also, if you have opted to maintain an expensive lifestyle for a whole other human being… you may have to deal with the consequences of someone who has opted to have their entire, expensive existence maintained by someone else. Like, if that is a priority for you, then your natural partner is someone for whom that is also a priority.

That may not work out as well as you want it to, for a variety of reasons.

Like, I know this isn’t going to reach an audience of frustrated and embittered heterosexual men, and I know if it did they wouldn’t listen to it anyway. But just… there is an absolute disconnect between the kind of relationship so many men purport to want, and the behaviours they exhibit. And for as long as that is the case, they are going to remain lonely and embittered.

[goshdangronpa]

I'm gonna ask you about Belladonna of Sadness because i'm curious and want to read your ramble 🧡

Yeees. My other passion besides Danganronpa is movies, so I'll be happy to write a few hundred words about one of my absolute favorites. Please excuse my lateness in answering this ask, I waited until I saw it again recently.

Belladonna of Sadness looks like no Japanese animated film you've ever seen, and not just because they did things differently in 1974. This film is unusual, and might be jarring, because much of it isn't even actually animated. There's liberal use of still images. Lip movement is nonexistent. Several shots see the camera panning across a lengthy tableu, sometimes for a couple of minutes.

But it doesn't feel cheap. The limited budget meets its match in the filmmakers' boundless imagination, creating an extraordinary work of art that challenges all definitions of a motion picture. Besides, like any good anime, they save most of their money and effort for the big setpieces. It's in these impressive animated setpieces that the movie comes alive.

These scenes are not exactly YouTube-friendly. Belladonna of Sadness is steeped in sex and sexuality. Though it starts with a fairy-tale wedding between French medieval peasants Jeanne and Jean, the movie makes its R-rated nature known in the immediate next scene, when the local lord invokes prima nocta and takes the lead in a gangbang of the bride. She returns home shattered, but finds unexpected joy in a friendly little sprite ... who turns out to be the Devil, feeding on her newfound desire for power. She gains influence in her village, loses it dramatically when it threatens the lord's power, and regains it in the wilderness after finally submitting to Satan. Much of this is conveyed through the lens of sex.

Belladonna of Sadness can be a harrowing watch. While the aforementioned rape scene isn't graphic, it's arguably worse in being impressionistic, presenting the physical and psychological trauma through imagery that's just barely metaphorical. But that's at the beginning of the movie. As Jeanne's life continues, along with her connection to the Devil, she grows to realize that she wants power, autonomy, freedom. This path sees her become a benevolent witch, miraculous healer, and sex goddess who gets the whole village in her thrall. Dismal scenes give way to exquisitely vibrant and psychedelic animation, including more than one orgy scene.

I don't know how much any of these words have done to recommend the film. It doesn't help that I can't find any real clips on YouTube (besides the inspired, tear-jerking, beautiful ending), and it's so hard to screencap (the Devil's design is ... phallic). What I can say is that eight years ago, I invited my crush - a close friend who loves anime - to catch the theatrical rerelease of this movie with me. Our hands touched the whole time, side by side, none daring to go further. We soon confessed, and that friend is now the love of my life. Every year on our anniversary, we watch Belladonna of Sadness ... maybe the least likely first date flick to result in a second one.

And even without that personal connection, I believe I'd still deeply admire it. The singular and brilliant approach to animation, the richly told story of rebuilding after sexual trauma, the incredible feminist philosophy ... I hope that if anyone reading this gives it a chance, they'd admire it too.

[sunshinechay]

15 Day BL Challenge! Part 3!

Day 45: Favourite BL that isn’t from the big four (Japan/Thailand/Taiwan/South Korea). For extra points - there are no points - tell us what country the BL is from.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

So I will freely admit that much of the BL I’ve been watching lately has been from either Thailand or Taiwan, however there was one show that came to mind immediately after I read today’s question.

My Lascivious Boss

It’s a BL web series from Vietnam that is absolutely amazing and very terrible at the same time. It is very obvious that it is very low budget but you can also tell the passion that was behind it. Everyone does a very good job with what they have, especially the actor who plays the main character, Minh Huang.

You can’t help but root for Ming Huang as he navigates the circumstances he finds himself in after having a one night stand with a guy who turns out to be his new boss. Especially after he realizes that because he was in drag when it happened, and his new Boss, Long was very drunk at the time, Long thinks the person he had sex with was actually a woman. Thus Minh Huang feels forced to pretend to be own sister (who doesn’t actually exist) in an effort to get Long to stop trying to pursue someone who doesn’t actually exist. Add in that his abusive ex shows back up and you have a receipe for a very entertaining ride.

This show is kind of terrible but definitely goes into the so bad it’s good territory. I loved every second of this show and do go back and rewatch it from time to time.

Plus Long has one of the quickest and funniest bisexual panics I’ve ever seen on screen, so there is that haha.

[theofficialdramallama]

Dear Festividder... (Festivids 2024)

Letter under the cut!

First off - thank you so much for putting your time and effort into making a vid for me~! <3

I love pretty much all aspects of all the fandoms I’ve requested, so I’m sure I’ll be so happy and grateful for whatever vid you create, but here’s some stuff to help if you want a little bit more to go on! My suggestions are just that: suggestions - I love to be surprised! <3

Music:

I would love it that the song is the right one for the vid - I have pretty broad musical tastes and there’s not a lot I don’t like, although I’m less keen on the more electronic/dubstep-y side of dance music. I really like folk music, pop-punk, 90s/00s boybands/girlbands, pop-rock, rock, pop (80s, 90s, 00s and some modern pop), 80s power ballads, singer-songwriters with their own instruments, some country, musical theatre soundtracks, K-Pop and J-Pop… I’m pretty old-school with my music tastes, but honestly I’ll listen to almost anything and if it works for the vid - that’ll make me love the song anyway! A lot of my favourite songs have come from vids <3

General:

I love my ships xD <3 However, general fandom vids are great too <3 Character studies, friendship vids, found-family trope vids, cute vids, sad vids, silly vids, bad-ass vids… They all warm different parts of my heart <3 <3

On to the individual fandoms:

~ Alexa & Katie (TV)

I only discovered this show recently, and I fell for it almost instantly! It's such a heartwarming show that actually deals with pretty serious topics <3 Katie x Aiden was top-tier enemies-to-lovers, so I'd love a vid focusing on them! Other topics could be Alexa and Katie's friendship over the course of the show, and general humour/crack vids! <3

~ Before I Fall (2017) [SAFETY]

This film is *chef’s kiss* <3 I love the time-loop aspect, so anything based around would be great~ A Sam character study would be brilliant, or anything Sam x Kent-related - they are such an underrated ship <3 <3

~ Colin From Accounts (TV)

If you've watched Colin From Accounts, you're one of the good ones! Seriously, this show is so underrated, and now that I've watched season 2 (spoilers ahead!), I'd love vids focused on Gordon and Ashley's developing relationship and their discovery of each other's family, the challenges that they face together, and that s2 cliffhanger! Anything Colin-related would be a hit vid too - I mean, that dog was born for the screen!

~ Dramaworld (TV)

If you know and have watched this show, I salute you! <3 Any vids related to Claire x Joon will be loved <3 <3 S1 vids are welcomed~ I know a lot of people might have simply seen s1 and not s2, and if this is you - go watch s2! It takes everything from s1 and turns it up to 11 with a bigger budget, more ambitious storylines and twists! <3 If we’re including s2 eps, [SPOILERS] angst-filled Claire x Joon break up vids, humour vids, dark vids based around the destruction of Dramaworld itself/Evan’s deception, Joon/Claire character studies... Anything goes!

~ Flight 29 Down

Jackson x Melissa is my ship (sorry Jaylor shippers!) Would love any vids focusing on the two of them, and would also love a Jackson character study vid. Humour vids and vids focusing on the friendship and overall arc of the whole cast’s journey in getting off the island would be great too~! Again, surprise me!

~ If Only (2004) [SAFETY]

Time loops are one of my favourite story tropes, and I love the unique take of having just one loop in the film - Paul Nicholls and Jennifer Love Hewitt were brilliant in their roles! For the vid, I'd love a Ian x Samantha vid - something focusing on the bittersweetness/angst of Samantha's death and Ian having to learn to let her go by sacrificing himself in her place </3

~ The In Between (2022) [SAFETY]

I love this film with a passion~ I’m a sucker for cheesy/overly-dramatic/romantic ghost stories, and this ticks all the boxes. Angsty Tessa x Skylar vids would suit me perfectly, but if you have any other ideas for vids, feel free to make them~! <3

~ The Sarah Jane Adventures

I love SJA so much - it's like a warm, comforting hug! It has such a wholesome vibe to it that I love! I was such a Clyde x Rani shipper during my viewing of the show, and to watch Clyde (spoilers!) admit his feelings for Rani during his Tales of the TARDIS ep was such a validation (still waiting on Rani Takes On The World s3!). Elisabeth Sladen was amazing as Sarah Jane, and a vid focused on her would be great <3 Otherwise, fun, heartwarming vids based around the whole cast and Clyde, Rani, Luke and Maria would all be welcomed <3

~ Schmigadoon! (TV)

First off - if you've watched Schmigadoon, but not Schmicago (Schmigadoon season 2), this is your sign to watch Schmicago right now! Done that? Great, welcome back! xD I love both seasons of this show so much, and the musicals that they lovingly reference <3 Any Josh x Melissa vids focusing on the arc their relationship throughout both seasons would be great! Fun/heartwarming vids featuring the many characters in the worlds of both Schmigadoon and Schmicago would be appreciated, and even fun vids that use some sort of musical OST as the soundtrack would be super!

~ Wreck (TV 2022)

It's the slasher/comedy/mystery show set on a cruise ship (until it wasn't) that stole my heart <3 Seriously, watch this show if you like slashers in any way, and if you've only seen season 1, watch season 2! Jamie x Olly vids, Vivian x Pippa vids and Cormac x Rosie vids would all be brilliant to see! You could lean into the fun slasher/teen horror vibes, delve into the deeper horror of Jamie's arc over the two seasons, or do something completely different - your choice! <3

[inliar]

timing

word count: 5.3k

jinhwan x reader

you have the uncanny knack of running into kim jinhwan exactly when he needs it. he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t intrigued.

a/n: support ikon on kingdom!

-

the first time you meet him, it’s at your friend’s debut stage. once upon a time, you and your friend, yerin, had been trainees together in a decently small company. but while her skills only grew over time, morphing into something fascinating and breathtaking that deserved to be shown to the world, yours had stagnated. it wasn’t for lack of effort – you had put just as many hours into dance and vocal lessons as the others –  but it was, probably, for lack of passion.

at some point, you had stopped emphasizing with your fellow trainee’s heartfelt speeches on their dreams of debuting, and it was around then that you realized you weren’t meant to be an idol in the same way they were. it was alright, though, because if anyone out of the two of you deserved to debut, it was her. you’d never felt any regret after terminating your short trainee agreement with your label.

but your friendship had never ceased, and you’d kept in regular contact with yerin, as well as the other trainees set to debut in the rookie group. you often took to reminding them to eat their meals, or to take breaks in between lessons, because you’d experienced first-hand how thoroughly unchecked passions can blind a person to their obvious needs. 

finally, their efforts had culminated into a debut, and you wouldn’t miss their first stage for the world. their manager, minseo (who, in a different timeline, might have been your manager as well) was kind enough to let you visit them face-to-face in their waiting room for the music program.

“nervous?” you ask, taking in yerin’s brightly-coloured romper and her bleached, curled, strands of hair. it’s such a far departure from the tracksuits and messy ponytail you’d often seen her sporting during early morning dance practices, but it somehow suits her better than anything else you’d ever seen her wear.

“excited.” she responds instead, with a frightening degree of certainty. it must be nice, you think, to have something you want so desperately and unfalteringly. but watching your best friend get to live out her dreams is almost just as nice.

you nod, feeling the corners of your lips quirk up. “have i ever told you how proud i am of you?” you say, lightheartedly, suppressing the urge to ruffle your hand over her well-styled hair.

“no, but since it’s coming from you, i know you mean it.” she says with such sincerity that you feel an unexpected surge of pride lodge itself into your chest. 

you clear your throat. this won’t do. she hasn’t even performed yet and you’re already turning into a sentimental mess. “i’m going to go get myself something to drink,” you say, excusing yourself. “do you want anything?”

her eyes brighten. “ooh, can i have an orange soda?” she asks, before pausing and turning around. “wait, manager-nim, am i allowed to drink soda before a stage?”

minseo tears her eyes away from her phone and straightens up. “as long as it’s not something that will rapidly stain your teeth, it should be fine. are you thirsty? do you need me to get you something?”

you pipe up. “oh, it’s fine, i can get it. you should stay with the group, unni, you’re the manager.” then, you raise your voice and direct it towards the rest of the girls. “hey, guys, i’m getting yerin a drink from the vending machine. does anyone else want anything?”

“oh, can i have a canned coffee?” you hear one of the members – jiyoung’s – voice ask.

“me too!” hyemin’s voice adds.

“vitamin water, please!” mirae’s voice calls.

you tally the drinks up in your head. two canned coffees, an orange soda, and vitamin water. you hold up an ‘okay’ sign with your hand and nod. jiyoung jokingly salutes in return.

“can i pay you back?” minseo offers, pulling out a credit card that most definitely won’t work on the rickety vending machines you’d seen on your way to the waiting room.

you shake your head dismissively. “it’s just a couple of drinks, and besides, i have a ton of coins i need to get rid of. you can buy me a meal later, yeah?” you offer, and minseo nods. “at this rate, i’ll have to hire you as my assistant.” she jokes, lightheartedly, and you smile. you wouldn’t mind that at all.

you recite the list of drinks to yourself as you make it out of their waiting room and towards the vending machine. two canned coffees, an orange soda, and vitamin water. two canned coffees, an orange soda, and vitamin water. two ca—

thud.

the small sound shakes you out of your mantra and, instinctively, you turn towards the noise. judging by the obvious frustration radiating from the person in front of you and his relative position to the vending machine, you figure he just kicked the poor thing.

“are you alright?” you ask, tentatively, and the person in question turns to face you. 

oh. it’s kim jinhwan. from ikon.

you try your hardest to suppress a smile. yerin loves ikon. she’d be so jealous to know that you ran into one of the members today, and in such an innocuous way at that.

“yes, sorry.” jinhwan offers, looking almost sheepish. “the machine stole my money, and-”

almost on cue, you hear a voice call out in the distance. “hurry up, hyung! you said it’d only take a few minutes!”

jinhwan’s expression instantly sours, and you nod in understanding. “what did you try to get, sunbaenim?” you ask politely, turning towards the machine and scanning its contents.

“just an energy drink. but i guess i’ll be fine without it.” he explains, trying a little too hard to sound lighthearted and unbothered. 

you identify the drink in question and punch in its code. after feeding your coins into the machine, you watch as the suddenly functional appliance pushes the energy drink out of its row and into the bottom of the machine.

squatting, you grab the drink and hold it out. “please, take this.” you offer as you stand up, suddenly noticing how heavily the foundation under his eyes is applied. you inwardly frown. he must really need the boost. “it’s the one you wanted, right?”

he doesn’t take it, instead opting to stare at it instead. “i couldn’t, i don’t have any more change on me right now.” he says, despite eyeing the drink longingly.

“hyung! we have to go!” the voice from before calls out again, insistently. he turns towards the voice before turning back to you, conflicted. you put on what you hope is a reassuring smile before pushing the drink with a little more force into his hands. instinctively, he takes it.

“please don’t worry about it, it’s just a drink. good luck with your stage, sunbaenim!” you cheer, gently. 

he looks at the drink, then looks at you, then glances behind him at what you presume to be his waiting room before looking at you again.

“jinhwan hyung!” the voice demands with an intimidating undercurrent of finality, leaving no more room to stall. you tilt your head towards it meaningfully.

“i.. thank you.” he finally says, tightly, before turning around and running away. satisfied, you turn towards the vending machine. what did your friends ask for? right, two canned coffees, an orange soda, and vitamin water. you punch the drink codes in, methodically inserting all of your loose change you had been trying to get rid of for so long, and add an extra coffee in for minseo for good measure. if she’s going to make good on her dinner promise, and you know she will, she should get a little something in return.

(you would have gotten her something even if you didn't coerce her into buying you food. a part of you thrives at the feeling of taking care of others, and you dimly wonder if that means anything.)

-

the next time you meet him is yet another case of being in the right place at the right time, for lack of a better phrase. 

you’d spent a good portion of your school days active as a trainee. so, when you’d eventually exited the entertainment industry, you were strikingly behind all the other students your age in the cruelly competitive system that was korea’s education system. you were planning on taking a gap year to figure out exactly what you wanted to do with the rest of your life (which was generally frowned upon, as students were expected to naturally know these things), but minseo had saved you from that fate. “since the girls have been getting a little bigger recently, i’ve been given the permission and the budget to hire an assistant manager.” she had explained through a spontaneous phone call, her voice crackling over the receiver as you shifted your cellphone to your other ear. “if i can trust anyone to care for them the way that i do, it’s you.”

“will it be okay?” you had asked, not against the proposition but not wanting to get her in trouble. “i have no managerial experience, and i’m in the same age range as the members. i don’t want the company to come off as unprofessional.”

she had reassured you that you wouldn’t be working on anything that she wouldn’t teach you to do first, and that, as long as you didn’t boast about your age, it would be fine. “i was allowed to write the hiring criteria, and if you just happen to be the perfect candidate, then so be it.” she had said, and you could almost imagine the conspiratorial wink she would have shot in your direction if you were talking face to face.

and so your reentrance to the entertainment industry had begun; except this time, you were on the other, more secluded, side of the stage. you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t considered being a manager before; you’ve always been the type to take care of others, and when minseo had joked about taking you on as an assistant before, a secret part of you had taken it a little too close to heart. but you had never actually expected her words to become a reality.

the job isn’t too hard to pick up. you’re assigned a lot of small yet useful tasks, like calling the salons and confirming hair appointment times, or writing the minutes for meetings about comeback concepts. sometimes, your only role for the day is simply coaxing minseo unni into stopping and taking a lunch break. you’re busy, for sure, but not yet at the juggling-octopus level of the senior manager, who is somehow able to coordinate every other task and responsibility that involves the group simultaneously and all without fail. while you just have to confirm the things she’s already set up, she has to do all the preparation work.  you’ve seen her meticulously arrange and assign each member’s schedules, all the while keeping an eye on album sales and concert venues and security payroll and feedback from their vocal or dance instructors. just by looking at her essay of a to-do list that’s propped up on her desk, you understand why the company gave her the permission to hire an assistant.

the most important responsibility she had given you, however, was to be the first line of contact with the members of the group. “you know them better than i do, so i think you’d do a better job of helping them out. they’re not too fussy, so it shouldn’t be too hard to work with them? just keep an eye on the members, and check on them every now and then. of course, let me know if you need any extra help.” a very harried minseo had told you, while on hold with the videography company who, annoyingly, hadn’t confirmed what time they were coming in tomorrow to film the dance video for the group’s upcoming comeback.

“yes, of course.” you had replied, fully intending to not do just that. you were going to avoid adding any responsibilities to minseo unni’s workload at all costs.

there wasn’t much that you needed to do. occasionally, you needed to get the members drinks or snacks while they were in their waiting rooms before music show performances, or make sure that they checked in with you before they went out anywhere. to help with this, you had gotten into the habit of carrying a backpack with you at all times, fully stocked with the necessities: an assortment of the member’s favourite snacks, an epipen for hyemin’s peanut allergy tucked in a small first aid kit, extra hair elastics, pads and tampons, and various sets of phone chargers. 

“you’re already, like, one of those overprepared asian mothers that carries everything in her massive purse, and you’re barely an adult.” yerin had snickered one day while you reorganized your bag in their dorm.

you had grinned, teasingly pushing her away. “it’s this overprepared asian mother that has your precious pocky at hand, so watch it.” you’d warned, shaking the snack box in the air. 

“don’t shake it!” yerin had yelped, cradling the cookie sticks protectively against her chest. “you’ll break them.”

it was the last week of promotions for the group’s third mini album, and you had just finished supervising the stage hands as they finished setting up the stage. satisfied, you grab your backpack from the chair it was lounging on, thank them for their hard work, and beeline for the exit, wondering if you can run into the girls before they get called down for their pre-stage interview.

“—ust going to have to wait, we don’t have any on hand right now.” you hear a gruff sounding voice say, and subconsciously, you look towards the source of the noise.

just across the hallway from you is what appears to be a very tall manager and a very short idol, judging from the casual apparel the taller is wearing and the shiny, glittery jacket the shorter one has on. the one in the glittery jacket is clutching at his shoulder in obvious discomfort. 

“how long do you think it will take?” the shorter asks, letting go of his shoulder and rolling it back, and you’d recognize that voice anywhere. yerin had recently been studying his stage habits by watching his fancams on repeat, and at this point, his voice was engraved in the back of your mind. it’s jinhwan, again. (“i can’t believe you got to meet jinhwan sunbae before i did,” yerin had pouted when you had told her about your previous encounter. “but why did you call him sunbae? he’s not technically your senior anymore.”

“so i used to be a trainee, and old habits die hard. sue me.” you had defended yourself, protectively, before making a mental note to stop doing that.)

“i’m not sure. i’m not supposed to leave the shooting site, and no one else has answered my calls yet. do you think you’ll be able to do the stage without a patch?” the manager asks.

the idol who you now recognize as jinhwan winces, and you take that as your cue to dig through your bag. after finding what you’re looking for, you take a nervous breath and walk towards the pair.

“hello,” you greet tentatively, bowing. the two of them turn to face you, and politely bow back. you don’t miss the way jinhwan’s face grimaces ever so slightly as he does so.

“i’m really sorry if i’m being invasive, but i happened to hear what was going on.” you start. at that, you offer him the pair of pain-relief patches you were clutching securely with both of your hands. “please, take these.”

the two of them pause, taking a second to read the upside-down text on the packaging. in hindsight, you probably should have held it so the text was facing them. “won’t you need them?” the manager asks, eventually looking back up at you.

you shake your head in denial, eyes wide. “no, no. i always have extras in my bag. besides, the ones my members use most often are the ankle patches, so i won’t miss these.” you explain, taking a short, meaningful glance at jinhwan’s shoulder before pushing the packages into his manager’s hands. 

he takes them. “thank you,” he says, gratefully, and you smile. 

“yes, of course.” you reply, taking another quick glance at jinhwan. he’s staring at you, expression carefully blank, but, upon making eye contact. he bows his head. “thank you,” he says as well, and you pause. there’s something in his tone that sounds off, but you can’t quite pinpoint what it is. 

you don’t have time to stand there and think about it, though, because your group is going to get called down for their interview any minute now. and while you don’t technically have to be there, minseo said that it would be a good idea for you to monitor them. “just so you can get used to your job,” she had said, and you agreed. it would be entirely selfish to back out on that now, just to stand and meaninglessly analyze a person you had no connections with.

“i … have to go now.” you begin, tentatively, ignoring the pressing feeling in the pit of your stomach thats begging you to stay and figure out what feels so wrong. “good luck on your stage, sunb- i mean! jinhwan-ssi, and i hope your shoulder feels better.”

you bow, reflexively, trying your best not to make a weird face out of embarrassment, and jinhwan bows back. “thank you, again.” he reiterates, and you turn to leave.

it’s only after you’re absolutely sure that you’re out of their line of view before you let yourself cringe. sunbae? you tried to call him sunbae? you really, really, need to get out of that habit. what kind of interaction was that?

‘but is he okay?’ a smaller, more insistent, voice in the back of your head asks, and you frown. you don’t know. 

- 

in between your last memorable encounter and the next one, you see him a few times. your group passes by him in a few music programs, you run into their group at a hair appointment, and a few other miscellaneous encounters as such naturally occur. but you never interact. as a manager, it’s not your job to play buddy-buddy with other idol groups, especially if they’re not even in your company. you’ve always done a very good job of staying out of the spotlight, and, as a manager, most people don’t spare you a glance. jinhwan doesn’t even look in your direction.

you’d be lying if you said you weren’t disappointed.

the third time you meet him is not, for once, at a music program. you’re in hapjeong-dong, meaning to visit a friend who’d recently moved into the area. but she’d last-minute changed her housewarming party time to a dinner party instead of a lunch meetup. by the time you’d got the memo, you were already halfway across seoul on the subway. since you hadn’t eaten anything yet, and you no longer had lunch plans, your first stop is at the first ramen shop you see after you exit the terminal.

“i’m afraid we’re a little full at the moment, ma’am, and the only seats available are at the counter. will that be alright?” the hostess asks, smiling warmly.

“yes, that’s great.” you say, and you let her escort you to the counter and hand you a menu. you prop up your purse and your housewarming gift on the chair next to you before taking it, thanking her.

as you’re flipping through the menu, mentally calculating how much more you’ll be able to spend this month, you hear the tinkling of the bell at the front door signalling another customer. a cursory glance around the relatively full counter area lets you know that there’s only one seat left, and you’re hogging it with your bags. you quickly take them off the only available chair and bend down to set them on the ground below your feet.

“... and here you go, sir, i’ll be back with a menu shortly.” the bubbly hostess says, smiling politely at the customer whose face you haven’t seen yet. you straighten up, taking a quick look at the hostess and the customer before turning back to look at your menu. 

“yes, thank you,” the customer says, and you freeze. you must be hearing things. there is no way that you are eating lunch next to kim jinhwan in a random restaurant.

the customer sits down next to you, and you shoot another quick look at the man who is taking off his mask. who is most definitely kim jinhwan. 

do you … do you say anything? idols deserve to eat in peace, so should you pretend not to recognize him? but won’t sitting in a stony, awkward silence as you eat next to each other be even worse? you contemplate burying yourself in your phone for the entire meal, before realizing that you left it in your purse. and there’s no feasible way that you can grab it without having to scoot back your chair, get off the stool to open your bag, and sit back up on it again. 

unfortunately for you, he looks in your direction as you’re gaping at him, panic-struck. the resulting eye contact is unbearably awkward on your end, but he looks at you as if he’s trying to remember who you are.

“pardon me, but are you the one who … with the pain-relief patch?” he asks, gesturing slightly with his hands as he sits dodwn. it’s vague and awkward, and if he did that to anyone else they’d be very confused, but you know exactly what he means.

you blush a little. there’s nothing else you can say now. “yes, uh, i think that was me.” 

“and … the vending machine?” he ventures.

your eyes widen a little at that. that was so many months ago. he still remembers? “the energy drink, right? that was also me. hello, jinhwan-ssi.” you offer, tentatively, bowing your head slightly. at this point, there’s no use pretending you don’t know his name. he bows his head in return.

“may i ask for your name?” jinhwan asks, tentatively.

“oh, ah, i’m ______.” you respond. “it’s nice to meet you, officially.” 

jinhwan nods in agreement, seemingly taking in all the new information for a few seconds. after a short pause, he continues. “do you also work in the entertainment industry?” he asks, slowly. 

“yes, i’m an assistant manager for kyubie, a new girlgroup at AB entertainment,” you introduce yourself. it still feels a little strange to say that title out loud. assistant manager. you’re an assistant manager.

“ah, i see.” jinhwan says, smiling a little as he processes the information, and you politely smile back. a part of you wants to help him carry this conversation out, but the other, more dominant part of you is just as socially awkward as he looks like he feels and is absolutely incapable of doing such a thing.

“you look quite young for a manager,” he offers, as an odd semblance of a compliment, and you take it in stride.

“i get that a lot! i actually used to be a trainee at AB, but i ended up becoming a manager inst!—ead …” you start, mouth running itself as it struggles to fill the awkward silence, before you register what you just said. 

“i, uh, i wasn’t supposed to say that.” you mutter, loudly enough so its audible but quietly enough to express your regret.

jinhwan, for what it’s worth, only looks placidly amused. “don’t worry, i won’t say a word,” he assures you. he doesn’t ask for any more details or for an elaboration on why it would be a secret. you’re grateful for that.

“thank you,” you say, trying not to let the relief show itself too heavily in your tone. if he notices it, he doesn’t say a word.

“i should be thanking you. for the drink and for the pain-relief patches, before. i don’t think i could have done my stage without either.” he assures you, kindly. “i didn’t get to thank you properly before.”

you shake your head in denial. “no, no, don’t worry about it. i get what it’s like to always be running low on time. and you did say thank you! i didn’t feel underappreciated, or ignored, or anything like that.” you explain, letting out your first real smile since the beginning of the conversation. 

(you miss the way his eyes linger on it for a beat too long.)

“i’m glad that you think that, then,” jinhwan says, faintly, as the hostess comes back with his menu that he barely even scans before ordering. you, too, order, ignoring the meaningful glances she’s throwing at the two of you. that’s a misunderstanding that can be resolved in the unlikely chance it becomes an issue.

“so,” jinhwan starts, “tell me about your group.”

and you’re gone.

conversation flows surprisingly easily once the two of you find your common ground. as a manager and as a friend, you have a lot to tell him about your members and how they act. “one of them, my friend, actually, she’s a really big fan of yours.” you mention, offhandedly. you’ve gone long past the point where you’re trying to filter yourself. 

“is that so?” he asks, calmly, and you grin.

“yeah. she was really jealous when i told her that i met you before,” you laugh, “and she’ll probably be a little bit jealous that i met you again today.”

“what about you?” he asks, and then looks a little bit startled. almost as if he hadn’t meant to say that out loud.

“i’m sorry?” you ask, despite knowing perfectly well what he’d meant to say. you do your best to not blush.

jinhwan, having seemingly decided to just go with it, smiles. “are you a fan of mine, too?” he asks, and oh, your cheeks are not supposed to feel this hot.

“i, uh—” you flounder, trying to think of a way to answer this professionally, before a strangely brave crevice of your mind tells you to be honest.

“before? i don’t know. but now? probably.” you admit, which is good enough for jinhwan.

he doesn’t push it (probably because you looked like a tomato just then and he wants to save your blood pressure), and instead steers the conversation back to your life as a manager and his funny anecdotes in the entertainment industry. for someone who is so soft spoken and looked so thoroughly awkward when you first met, he tries incredibly hard to keep the conversation flowing and comfortable. you’re half in awe at his easy going nature.

you eat slowly once you get your food, selfishly wanting the conversation to last longer, but eventually there are no more noodles left in your plate and half of the lunchtime rush has already cleared out. jinhwan excuses himself to pay, asking you to watch his jacket, and you grab your purse and your housewarming gift from the floor while you wait. your phone tells you that it’s been nearly two hours since you entered the restaurant, and you must have suddenly forgotten how to read time, because there’s no possible way you had spent that long talking with jinhwan.

he eventually comes back. he puts his mask on and grabs his jacket from the back of his chair, and you take that as your cue to head to the payment counter. “i’m here to pay for my order,” you say, pulling out your wallet, and the checkout man shakes his head. 

“you’re already paid for,” he explains, and you frown. “pardon me?” you ask, unsure if you heard him right.

“the gentleman who sat next to you has already paid for your meal,” he clarifies, and you stand there for a moment.

“are— are you sure?” you ask, confusedly. the checkout man nods. “here’s the purchase receipt if you want to be sure.”

the sound of the front door bell tinkling draws your attention, and you turn to see jinhwan’s figure leave the shop. “thank you!” you exclaim hurriedly to the counter, mindlessly stuffing the receipt in your left pocket before booking it out of there.

by the time you get to the outside of the shop, jinhwan is a good ten meters away. “jinh—!” you start, and then stop. yelling an idol’s name in public is most definitely not a good idea. 

you’ve never been the most active, but you run after him anyway. thankfully, he’s not making an effort to run away from you, because you wouldn’t be able to catch up with him then. 

eventually, you catch up with him as he’s waiting for a pedestrian walkway to turn green. “jinhwan-ssi!” you call, furtively, and the man in question turns around to face you.

" ______.” he says, curiously. “what are you doing here?”

“you paid for my meal.” you state, and he looks at you like it’s obvious. 

“yes, i did.” he says, frowning a little. the pedestrian walkway turns green. he doesn’t make any effort to move.

“can i pay you back?” you ask, hand instinctively going towards your wallet in your right pocket.

he laughs a little at that. “why would you pay me back? this is my thank you for the favours you did for me.”

“you don’t have to pay me back! i did those things because i could. besides, a vending machine drink and a pain-relief patch costs much less than a meal.” you argue.

“then, consider it like i’m doing this because i can.” he counters, and its very hard to object to your own logic.

“can i at least buy you coffee or something as thanks?” you ask, as the pedestrian walkway turns red once more. 

at this, jinhwan pauses, before he sighs. “i have vocal practice in half an hour, so i can’t right now. but—” he continues, seeing the look of disappointment you already knew was on your face, “did you get the receipt from the checkout guy?”

“the what?” you ask, confused.

his face pales. “oh no, did you not take it?” he asks, suddenly looking scared, and you remember mindlessly snatching the receipt from the checkout man’s hands. you clumsily pat through your pockets a little before pulling a slip of paper out from your left pocket. “no, i have it,” you say, holding it up, “but why?”

jinhwan sighs. “turn it over,” he says, and you do.

in pen, a phone number is scribbled over the back of the receipt. “jinhwan,” it says in neatly printed letters next to it, and you fight back the urge to smile. you probably do a terrible job of it, too.

“text me when you’re free, and we can do coffee sometime, yeah?” jinhwan offers. you can’t see his face well because of his mask, but the tips of his ears are red. it’s stupidly endearing.

“i will,” you promise, because how could you say no to that?

the walkway light turns green once again. jinhwan waves as he crosses the street, and you wave as you stay behind. its only after you’re absolutely, positively sure that he’s out of sight that you let yourself grin, burying your too-hot face into your hands. 

if you just played your cards right, you have a date with kim jinhwan.

-

(you text him the very same day, and make plans for coffee the next week.

you treat him to crepe cakes and lattes, and he pouts, claiming that the crepes were too much and now he just has to take you out to make up for it.

before you can tell him that no, it’s fine, it’s your treat, he has movie tickets for two booked and emailed to your account.

you agree to go, but only if you get to buy the popcorn.)

[felassan]

Article: ‘The Most Powerful Woman in Gaming Wants to Make EA Loved Again’

Laura Miele is helping direct the company toward a future where it’s more attuned with consumers.

One of the first things Laura Miele did when she became chief studios officer of Electronic Arts Inc. three years ago was to gather 19 video game influencers in a conference room. “What do you want me to hear? Lay it on me,” she recalls asking them. “One guy sitting at the corner of the table, he just said, ‘I don’t understand why you don’t give players what they’re asking for.’ ”

[rest of article under cut for length, pasted as Bloomberg has an article read limit]

One of the first things Laura Miele did when she became chief studios officer of Electronic Arts Inc. three years ago was to gather 19 video game influencers in a conference room. “What do you want me to hear? Lay it on me,” she recalls asking them. “One guy sitting at the corner of the table, he just said, ‘I don’t understand why you don’t give players what they’re asking for.’ ”

It’s something many gamers have wondered about EA for years. The $40 billion company, one of the biggest in gaming, is responsible for Battlefield, Madden NFL, and other megahit franchises. But many gamers have long seen EA as a necessary evil, resenting the direction in which it took some games and bristling at its aggressive attempts to extract money by charging extra for digital items in games that cost as much as $70 upfront. This dissatisfaction was no secret in 2018: Gamers spent their days filling up Reddit and other message boards with free advice for EA—but many felt its decision-makers weren’t listening.

EA’s leadership knows it has to improve that relationship, and Miele is a key player in its efforts to do so. Her focus group asked for new content for Star Wars Battlefront II and requested new types of games. Miele quickly assigned 70 people to the Battlefront development project, which dramatically improved its net promoter score, a measure of how likely people are to recommend the game. She also prompted EA to create a skateboarding game and committed to reintroducing its college football franchise, the two genres at the top of the influencers’ list.

In a sense, the guy at the meeting became a stand-in for all of EA’s long-suffering customers in Miele’s eyes. “I wanted to do right by this player,” she says.

As chief studios officer, Miele manages 6,000 staffers and thousands of contractors globally. She oversees EA’s 24 studios, where she makes personnel decisions and sets strategy, and she’s reshaped how the company uses analytics to create and market its games.

In the process she may have become the most powerful woman in gaming. In a 2019 International Game Developers Association survey, fewer than 30% of the more than 1,100 respondents were women, and few if any hold a more central role at such an important company. “It’s a tough place for a woman,” says Peter Moore, who was Miele’s boss when he was EA’s chief operating officer. “It wasn’t always smooth sailing, but she battled her way through.”

Proving good intentions is more important for EA than ever, as the business model of gaming continues to shift in ways that have the potential to alienate customers. Like its rivals, the company is increasing its focus on free-to-play games, making money through sales of digital products such as outfits and weapons for characters.

There are signs it’s succeeding. Apex Legends, EA’s free-to-play hero shooter game, has posted more than $1 billion in sales since it was first published in 2019, and it continues to grow. “The way to succeed with free-to-play games like that is to listen to and engage your customer base and earn their loyalty through incremental purchases,” says Doug Clinton, managing partner of the venture capital firm Loup Ventures, who says Miele deserves much of the credit for Apex Legends. “It feels like a proof point for her that the company is adapting well beyond traditional disk sales.”

Miele, 51, was born in San Francisco but grew up on the north shore of Lake Tahoe. She got her start in games—the kind that require a board—during family nights, when she pitted herself against her brother in Monopoly, Clue, Yahtzee, and backgammon. While attending the University of Nevada at Las Vegas, she worked at architectural companies. By the time she dropped out she’d moved on from receptionist positions to more senior roles, while gaining a reputation for organizing lunch-hour card games with her co-workers.

Miele landed a job as a project manager at Westwood Studios, a video game developer best known for Command and Conquer, in 1996. She eventually took over all marketing for its parent company, Virgin Interactive.

It wasn’t always a hospitable atmosphere: Miele remembers her colleagues expecting her to take notes at meetings, then clean up afterward. “That is just not something I would do today,” she says. “I adapted a lot because I was so passionate about what I was doing. I found my voice along the way.”

When EA acquired Westwood in 1998, she stayed on. At the time, the company did revenue forecasting by looking at sales data once a month and putting together spreadsheets by hand. Miele was tasked with developing more advanced analytics. She hired a group of data analysts, nicknamed “the Jedi,” and had them build EA’s first statistical regression models to examine sales trends, seasonality, and preorders. It took almost two years to put the system in place, but it overhauled the company’s business processes, and executives were soon using it to determine how to invest in advertising and promotions. “I loved how data and analytics can inform your judgment and your gut instinct,” Miele says.

Miele also decided to make one major break with EA’s existing business practices. In 2011 about 80% of game advertising budgets were spent on TV ads. But she saw how much time gamers spent online and decided to spend the bulk of the ad budget for Battlefield 3 on digital, downplaying other types of ads and cutting the TV ad budget to only 30%.

Messing around with the plan for Battlefield 3 was a good way to make people nervous. Miele remembers two executives calling her in for a meeting and demanding to know why they weren’t seeing billboards for the game as they drove in to the office. “It was scary for me, too, and I don’t blame our executives questioning me on that,” she says. But the game ended up being EA’s fastest-selling, moving more than 5 million copies in its first week. From that point, Miele’s marketing strategy became the standard for the company.

When EA signed a 10-year deal with Walt Disney Co. in 2013, Miele became Star Wars general manager. In 2014 she took over publishing operations, marketing, and other key areas, first in the North American region, then globally in 2016. At the time, the game industry was moving from physical disks to digital downloads, transforming its relationship with retail partners such as Walmart Inc. and Best Buy Co.

Miele was in charge of smoothing things over, explaining that EA would start competing with them for customers even as the retailers accounted for the largest portion of the revenue. “I never said to them, ‘Hey, see you later, we are moving on,’ ” she says. “It was, ‘How can we move forward together?’ ” EA began making physical cards with digital credits that its retail partners could sell at their stores, allowing them to share in the revenue from digital sales.

EA’s studios are spread around the globe, and Covid-19 altered Miele’s routine radically. “It was a very difficult year, and I’m really proud about how our company showed up,” she says. “I considered myself a wartime leader last year. You had to get in a bunker with everybody.”

Days became an endless progression of Zoom calls. To keep up with gamers, Miele started spending evenings listening to Clubhouse chats while answering work emails. Because she hasn’t been on the road, she’s also had more time to dine at home and play board games or Apex Legends and The Sims with her 16-year-old twins. As the pandemic retreats in the U.S., her schedule might change, but she still envisions providing more flexibility to her employees to work from home and office. “I do think we’re going to have a different work environment as we go forward,” she says.

Miele is itching to get back to the studio visits. She’s helping steer EA further toward smartphones. The company plans to release mobile versions of Apex Legends globally this year and spent $2.1 billion in April for Glu Mobile Inc., a mobile game publisher, while also preparing the next releases in its existing franchises. “I think the next Battlefield and the mobile shooter games, along with how successful the M&As come out will be key litmus tests of her management this year,” says Matt Kanterman, an analyst with Bloomberg Intelligence. “Her scope is clearly rising.”

— With Dina Bass and Jason Schreier

[source]

[destiny-smasher]

Life is Strange: True Colors

Leading up to the release of Episode 1 of TellTale's The Walking Dead game, I was working freelance for GameRevolution at the time, lived in the area, and had the chance to play a build of the game to write a preview on it. I remember comparing it to Mass Effect because, at the time, there just...weren't games of that subgenre. Of course, by now we've seen an explosion of this type of game - the 'narrative/choice-driven game,' spearheaded and even oversaturated by Telltale to their own demise.

Out of all of the games that have come from that initial boom, Life is Strange by DontNod was and still is the most influential on my life, but I also have always harbored really conflicted feelings about it - especially with how it resolved its narrative. Hell, if you're reading this, you're probably aware that I spent a few years of my life creating a sequel fanstory which I even adapted a chunk of into visual novel format. Hundreds of thousands of words, days and days of life spent essentially trying to process and reconcile my conflicted feelings about this game's conclusion(s). Since then, I've been experimenting with interactive fiction and am currently developing my own original visual novel using everything I've learned from both creating and playing games in this genre. It's a subgenre of game I have a lot of interest and passion for because, when handled well, it can allow a player to sort of co-direct a guided narrative experience in a way that's unique compared to strictly linear cinematic experiences but still have a curated, focused sense of story.

Up until this point, I've regarded Night in the Woods as probably the singular best game of this style, with others like Oxenfree and The Wolf Among Us as other high marks. I've never actually put any Life is Strange game quite up there - none of them have reached that benchmark for me, personally. Until now, anyway.

But now, I can finally add a new game to that top tier, cream of the crop list. Life is Strange: True Colors is just damn good. I'm an incredibly critical person as it is - and that critique usually comes from a place of love - so you can imagine this series has been really hard to for me given that I love it, and yet have never truly loved any actual full entry in it. I have so many personal issues, quibbles, qualms, and frustration with Life is Strange: with every individual game, with how it has been handled by its publisher (my biggest issue at this point, actually), with how it has seemingly been taken away from its original development studio, with how it chooses to resolve its narratives...

But with True Colors, all of those issues get brushed aside long enough for me to appreciate just how fucking well designed it is for this style of game. I can appreciate how the development team, while still clearly being 'indie' compared to other dev teams working under Square-Enix, were able to make such smart decisions in how to design and execute this game. Taken on its own merits, apart from its branding, True Colors is absolutely worth playing if you enjoy these 'telltale' style games. Compared to the rest of the series, I would argue it's the best one so far, easily. I had a lot of misgivings and doubts going in, and in retrospect, those are mostly Square-Enix's fault. Deck Nine, when given the freedom to make their own original game in the same vein as the previous three, fucking nailed it as much as I feel like they could, given the kinds of limitations I presume they were working within.

I'm someone who agonizes every single time there is news for Life is Strange as a series - someone who essentially had to drop out of the fandom over infighting, then dropped out of even being exposed to the official social media channels for it later on (I specifically have the Square-Enix controlled channels muted). I adore Max and Chloe, and as a duo, as a couple, they are one of my top favorites not just in gaming, but in general. They elevated the original game to be something more than the sum of its parts for me. And while I have enjoyed seeing what DontNod has made since, it's always been their attention to detail in environmental craftsmanship, in tone and atmosphere, which has caught my interest. They're good at creating characters with layers, but imo they've never nailed a narrative arc. They've never really hit that sweet spot that makes a story truly resonate with me. Deck Nine's previous outing, Before the Storm, was all over the place, trying to mimic DontNod while trying to do its own things - trying to dig deeper into concepts DontNod deliberately left open for interpretation while also being limited in what it could do as a prequel.

But with True Colors, those awkward shackles are (mostly) off. They have told their own original story, keeping in tone and concept with previous Life is Strange games, and yet this also feels distinctly different in other ways.

Yes, protagonist Alex Chen is older than previous characters, and most of the characters in True Colors are young adults, as opposed to teenagers. Yes, she has a supernatural ability. And yes, the game is essentially a linear story with some freedom in how much to poke around at the environment and interact with objects/characters, with the primary mechanic being making choices which influence elements of how the story plays out. None of this is new to the genre, or even Life is Strange. But the execution was clearly planned out, focused, and designed with more caution and care than games like this typically get.

A smaller dev team working with a budget has to make calls on how to allocate that budget. With True Colors, you will experience much fewer locales and environments than you will in Life is Strange 2. Fewer locations than even Life is Strange 1, by my count. But this reinforces the game's theming. I suspect the biggest hit to the game's budget was investing in its voice acting (nothing new for this series) but specifically in the motion capture and facial animation.

You have a game about a protagonist trying to fit in to a small, tightly knit community. She can read the aura of people's emotions and even read their minds a little. And the game's budget and design take full advantage of this. You spend your time in a small main street/park area, a handful of indoor shops, your single room apartment. It fits within a tighter budget, but it reinforces the themes the game is going for. Your interactions with characters are heightened with subtle facial cues and microexpressions, which also reinforces the mechanic and theming regarding reading, accepting, and processing emotions. And you get to make some choices that influence elements of this - influenced by the town, influenced by the emotions of those around you, which reinforce the main plot of trying to navigate a new life in a small town community.

When I think about these types of games, the conclusion is always a big deal. In a way, it shouldn't be, because I usually feel it's about the journey, not the destination. And as an example, I actually really dislike the ending of the original Life is Strange. I think it's a lot of bullshit in many ways. The setpiece is amazing and epic, sure, but the actual storytelling going on is...really hollow for me. Yes, the game does subtly foreshadow in a number of ways that this is the big choice it's leading up to, but the game never actually makes sense of it. And the problem is, if your experience is going to end on a big ol' THIS or THAT kind of moment, it needs to make sense or the whole thing will fall apart as soon as the credits are rolling and the audience spends a moment to think about what just happened. When you look at the end of Season 1 of Telltale's The Walking Dead, it's not powerful just because of what choice you're given, but because through the entire final episode, we know the stakes - we know what is going to ultimately happen, and we know the end of the story is fast approaching. All of the cards are on the table by the time we get to that final scene, and it works so well because we know why it's happening, and it is an appropriate thematic climax that embodies the theming of the entire season. It works mechanically, narratively, and thematically, and 'just makes sense.'

The ending of Life is Strange 1 doesn't do that, if you ask me. The ending of most games in this genre don't really hit that mark. When I get to the end of most game 'seasons' like this, even ones I enjoy, I'm typically left frustrated, confused, and empty in a way.

The ending of True Colors, on the other hand, nails everything it needs to. Handily, when compared to its peers.

If you're somehow reading this and have not played this game but intend to, now is probably where you should duck out, as I will be

discussing SPOILERS from the entire game, specifically the finale.

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Firstly, since I don't know where else to put this, some criticisms I found with the game. And honestly, they're all pretty damn minor compared to most games of this type.

Mainly, I just wish the whole Typhon thing was handled a bit more deliberately. It's a bit weird to do the 'big evil corporation' thing (especially when a big corporation like Square Enix occupies as much as or even more of the credits to this game than the people who actually MADE it?) without offering more explanation and subtlety. The game certainly makes some efforts but they're mostly small and mostly optional, like background chatter or a handful of one-off bits of documentation/etc. you can find in the environment. I feel like Diane in particular needed to be fleshed out just a little bit more to really sell us on how and why things like this happen, why corporations make decisions that cost people their happiness, security, and lives and they just get to keep on doing it. I think just a little bit that is unavoidable to the player that puts emphasis on maybe how much the town relies on the money/resources Typhon provides would've helped. Again, this is minor, but it stands out when I have so little else to critique.

I would've liked to get more insight on why Jed is the way he is. No, I don't think we really needed to learn more about his backstory, or even really his motivations. I think we get enough of that. I just think it would've been great to somehow highlight more deliberately how/why he's built up this identity overtop of what he's trying to suppress. Maybe even just having Alex internally realize, "Wait, what the hell, Jed has been hiding these emotions and my powers haven't picked up on it?" or something to that effect could have added an extra oomph to highlight how Jed seems to be coping with his emotions by masking/suppressing them. Also really minor complaint, but again...there's not much else here I can think to really improve on within the confines of what's in the game.

The game doesn't really call Alex's power into question morally. Like. Max has an entire meltdown by the end of her story, second-guessing if she's even helped anyone at all, if she has 'the right' to do so, how her powers might be affecting or expressing her own humanity and flaws...this story doesn't really get into that despite a very similar concept of manipulating others. There's like one bit in a document you can choose to read in Alex's 'nightmare' scene, but that's really it. I feel like this sentiment and how it's executed could have easily been expanded upon in just this one scene to capture what made that Max/Other Max scene do what it did in a way that would address the moral grayness of Alex's powers and how she uses them, and give players a way to express their interpretation of that. Also, very small deal, just another tidbit I would've liked to see.

When I first watched my wife play through Episode 5 (I watched her play through the game first, then I played it myself), I wasn't really feeling the surreal dreamscape stuff of Alex's flashbacks - which is weird, because if you're read my work from the past few years, you'll know I usually love that sort of shit. I think what was throwing me off was that it didn't really feel like it was tying together what the game was about up until that point, and felt almost like it was just copying what Life is Strange did with Max's nightmare sequence (minus the best part of that sequence, imo, where Max literally talks to herself).

But by the time I had seen the rest of the story, and re-experienced it myself, I think it clicked better. This is primarily a story about Alex Chen trying to build a new life for herself in a new community - a small town, a tightly knit place. Those flashbacks are specifically about Alex's past, something we only get teeny tiny tidbits of, and only really if we go looking for them. I realized after I gave myself a few days to process and play through the game myself that this was still a fantastic choice because it reinforces the plot reasons why Alex is even in the town she's in (because her father went there, and her brother in turn went there looking for him), and it reinforces the theme of Alex coming to accept her own emotions and confront them (as expressed through how the flashbacks are played out and the discussions she has with the image of Gabe in her mind, which is really just...another part of herself trying to get her to process things).

By the time Alex escapes the mines and returns to the Black Lantern, all of the cards are on the table. By that point, we as the audience know everything we need to. Everything makes sense - aside from arguably why Jed has done what he has done, but put a pin in that for a sec. We may not know why Alex has the powers she does, but we have at least been given context for how they manifested - as a coping mechanism of living a life inbetween the cracks of society, an unstable youth after her family fell apart around her (and oof, trust me, I can relate with this in some degree, though not in exactly the same ways). And unlike Max's Rewind power, the story and plot doesn't put this to Alex's throat, like it's all on her to make some big choice because she is the way she is, or like she's done something wrong by pursuing what she cares about (in this case, the truth, closure, and understanding).

When Alex confronts Jed in front of all of the primary supporting characters, it does everything it needs to.

Mechanically: it gives players choices for how to express their interpretation of events, and how Alex is processing them; it also, even more importantly, uses the 'council' as a way of expressing how the other characters have reacted to the choices the player has made throughout the game, and contributes to how this climax feels. We're given a 'big choice' at the end of the interaction that doesn't actually change the plot, or even the scene, really (it just affects like one line of dialogue Alex says right then) and yet BOTH choices work so well as a conclusion, it's literally up to your interpretation and it gives you an in-game way to express that.

Thematically: the use of the council reinforces the game's focus on community; and the way the presentation of the scene stays locked in on Alex and Jed's expressions reinforces its focus on emotion - not to mention that the entire scene also acts as a way to showcase how Alex has come to accept, understand, and process her own emotions while Jed, even THEN, right fucking at the moment of his demise, is trying to mask his emotions, to hide them and suppress them and forget them (something the game has already expressed subtly by way of his negative emotions which would give him away NOT being visible to Alex even despite her power).

Narratively: we are given a confrontation that makes sense and feels edifying to see play out after everything we've experienced and learned. We see Alex use her powers in a new and exciting way that further builds the empowering mood the climax is going for and adds a cinematic drama to it. No matter what decisions the player makes, Alex has agency in her own climax, we experience her making a decision, using her power, asserting herself now that she has gone through the growth this narrative has put her through. Alex gets to resolve her shit, gets to have her moment to really shine and experience the end of a character arc in this narrative.

Without taking extra time to design the game around these pillars, the finale wouldn't be so strong. If they didn't give us enough opportunities to interact with the townspeople, their presence in the end wouldn't matter, but everyone who has a say in the council is someone we get an entire scene (at least one) dedicated to interacting with them and their emotions. If they didn't implement choices in the scene itself, it would still be powerful but we wouldn't feel as involved, it'd be more passive. If they didn't showcase Alex's power, we might be left underwhelmed, but they do so in a way that actually works in the context through how they have chosen to present it, while also just tonally heightening the climax by having this drastic lighting going on. If they didn't have the council involved, we'd lose the theming of community. If they didn't have the foil of Alex/Jed and how they have each processed their emotions, we'd miss that key component. And if we didn't have such detailed facial animations, the presentation just wouldn't be as effective.

Ryan/Steph are a little bit like, in this awkward sideline spot during the climax? Steph always supports you, and Ryan supports you or doubts you conditionally, which is unsurprising but also ties into the themes of Ryan having grown up woven into this community, and Steph being once an outsider who has found a place within it. They're still there, either way, which is important. The only relevant characters who aren't present are more supporting characters like Riley, Ethan, and Mac. Ethan being the only one of those who gets an entire 'super emotions' scene, but that also marks the end of his arc and role in the story, so...it's fine. Mac and Riley are less important and younger, as well, and have their own side story stuff you have more direct influence on, too.

But damn, ya'll, this climax just works so well. It especially stands out to me given just how rarely I experience a conclusion/climax that feels this rewarding.

And then after that we get a wonderful montage of a theoretical life Alex might live on to experience. Her actions don't overthrow a conglomerate billionaire company. She doesn't even save a town, really. If the entire council thinks you're full of shit, Jed still confesses either way - because it's not up to the council whether he does this, it's because of Alex, regardless of player choice. Honestly, even after a playthrough where I made most choices differently from my wife, there weren't really many changes to that montage at the end. It'd have been great if it felt more meaningfully different, but maybe it can be. Even if not, the design intent is there and the execution still works. It's a really nice way to end the story, especially since it's not even a literal montage but one Alex imagines - again, her processing what she's gone through, what she desires, expressed externally for us to see it. And for once, the actual final 'big decision' in a game of this type manages to be organic, make sense, and feel good and appropriate either way. You choose to either have Alex stay in Haven Springs and continue building her life there, or you can choose to have her leave and try to be an indie musician, with the events of the game being yet another chunk of her life to deal with and move on from (I haven't really touched on it, but music, especially as a way to express and process emotions, is a recurring thing, much like photography was in the original game, or Sean's illustrations in LiS2). For once, a climactic 'pick your ending' decision that doesn't feel shitty. It's pretty rare for this genre, honestly.

I could - and already have, and likely will - have so much more to say about this game and its details, but I really wanted to focus on touching upon a main element that has left me impressed: the way the entire game feels designed. It feels intentionally constructed but in a way that reinforces what it is trying to express as a story. It's not just trying to make people cry for the sake of 'emotions.' It is a game literally about emotions and it comes to a conclusion in a way that is clearly saying something positive and empowering about empathy and self-acceptance.

Storytelling is a craft, like any other, and it entails deliberate choices and decisions that can objectively contribute to how effective a story is for its intended audience.

A good story isn't something you find, after all.

It's something you build.

[life-rewritten]

WHAT I WANT FROM BLS IN 2021 AKA A LOOK AND DISCUSSION ABOUT HOW TO IMPROVE THE BL GENRE

Hi, Hello; Bls have become incredibly saturated and growing each day, every single day we hear about new projects, new ideas, latest trailers, and it's been so great to see how BL has changed from 2015 to now. It's been a positive upward trajectory; however, again, we have to mention that it's being overfilled and not always with good shows. From the six or more countries that fight to get our energy and time to watch their shows, movies and animations, to the low budget, lazy plots that don't need to be written, Bl can sometimes be a phenomenal experience and incredible stories that make us cry and feel and learn or it can be this flop with no message, no structured plot, stiff acting and more. Am I being harsh? Should we just be okay with the fact there are more BL shows now to binge and to watch? Should we just settle for these bad stories just because there's nothing else available? I don't think so, I think with shows like ITSAY, Cherry Magic, GAYA SA, Bls have the potential to be so prominent, so unique and even beat out other heterosexual shows. So I am here to make a list of what I would like to see in 2021 with these new BL shows. Because it's quality, not quantity we want, we want better stories, better characters, better developments, just better. If we can be better, we can take over a lot of media, and there'd be more representation, education and more for the voices that want to be represented through BLs. Okay so without further or do let's get into it; 

The problem with Skinship

Now I hate to be the one that has to mention this issue, because sometimes in BLs this is not an issue; in fact sometimes some shows have too many kisses/skin ship, that end up making fans bored and frustrated with how much screen time is not being used to tell a great plot. But for me, since I started this journey into this genre, kissing has always been an issue with forced censorship that makes no sense, and stiff actors that clearly aren't comfortable with doing that. To couples that are meant to be so devoted and in love they resort to acting like buddies who can't touch each other to cut scenes and weird camera angles for a scene. Skinship isn't always needed but when a couple is meant to be obsessed with each other or addicted to thinking about touching the other, or there's a build-up of longing, and they're a long term relationship,  passionate couples kissing makes it more believable to me. What's up with this pattern of BLS avoiding kisses; please stop it's irksome I know I sound like a fujoshi but those couples that do this make me want to throw something because they're not believable no matter how much they scream from the top of their lungs,  that they love being with each other, or are attracted to each other, the lack of skinship just makes me get annoyed by it all. I also love shows like Cherry Magic where it's a softer relationship but teasing kisses and then like hiding behind an elevator for the main couple, not cool.

 I'm not going to make it a big deal, but I did feel somehow cheated at the finale of the show because one, in the manga this is not a problem, there is a lot of kisses with Adachi and Kurosawa, two, why would the second lead couple get a kiss scene but then when it comes to the main it's hidden behind an elevator, it's such a cheap way to censor it in my opinion especially since we've been teased about these two's kiss since episode 2/3. I don't need to see Adachi losing his virginity or whatnot, but I was disappointed when the elevator scene happened I was like but why it could have just been a cute kiss scene on the roof. It didn't need to be so covered and hidden. Make it make sense.  

So I don't particularly appreciate being teased by stuff like this, because it's not a sin for two people to show they care about each other like an average couple and kiss. It doesn't make the show not tasteful, or too crass, it just means that the couple are attracted to each other. I don't know, maybe it's just me, perhaps I am a fujoshi, and this is bothering me. But it's seriously to me more than that; there are some shows where this isn't a problem, where we don't need kisses and all that, but there are some where it feels so hypocritical and odd to censor a kiss like it's a sin or something. And with these shows (2gether for example)  it doesn't sit well with me, it really doesn't.  Just my opinion

The Issue With Side couples. 

Side couples need to add something to the show's plot or be balanced: there's the saying too much or too little. And with BLs I have found that the screen time of side couples can ruin or elevate a show. If you can't write a well thought out plot for extra couples, then don't add them. Normally some side couples are written powerfully and interesting as the central couple like Tin and Can from LBC or KingRam from My engineer etc., other times side couples just steal screen time for no reason, we could be using that time to make the other main couple stronger and it would be fine. Not in every BL show, that every single person have to turn out gay in the show, it's not by force. What side couples should do in a show, is add to the structured plot, give information/exposition about the world of the show, the ideas of the show, the themes of the show, they should be just as 3dimensional, just as important and fleshed out as the other characters are otherwise there's no need for them. 

Why R U, for example, had great bases for every side couple but failed due to rushed editing, lazy directing and more to make use of them. At the end of the day, the confusion with the side couples ruined the show and made everyone feel frustrated and tired by how the show was done because it felt unsatisfactory for the other plots of the side couples. An example where a side couple was done right in terms of plot but also didn't have enough coverage was TharnType season 1 with Tum and Tar, their plot was fantastic, essential and necessary to the storyline and it made sense. However, it still left a weird empty feeling because their relationship was still confusing, in LBC 2 we were meant to sort that out and Love by Chance 2 was one of the worst ways side couples are done. 

They used them for product placement (same as TharnType 7 years). Their stories were just repeating the same things we've already seen before, with no effort, no energy, and no direction given to the actors who were working hard to portray these roles. It's frustrating when side couples could be just as great in the show, but they're ruined by bad writing. 

Either have side couples with depth and storytelling that is good or don't add them at all. An example of a show without a side couple is Gaya Sa Pelikula and ITSAY. And you didn't see us moaning or crying about the lack of side couples instead it was praised because every side character had a purpose, a story of their own to tell, and depth to their characters that was needed to get us to the rest of the plot. Everyone had their own important role in the plot, and it was brilliant. So you don't need a show with many couples, you can just focus on one, or if you do have many storylines for couples, please just make it worthwhile. Please? 2021? I'm begging

More unique BLS: 

When we think about plot lines for BLs, we tend to especially in Thailand have one thing in mind which is engineering, medical students, university angst and guys in white t-shirts playing the same role over and over and over again. Don't forget the sotus gear being a symbol of their heart. I find it funny because I don't have a problem with this; if the storyline is unique/addicting enough for me to not focus on the fact it's a university plot. For example, Theory of love, but it is funny that for a very long time BLs have been focused on one type of setting; the university. We had other BLs that came from China, and Taiwan and others that weren't always based on this setting, especially China which has fantasy and more but those ended up being sad, censored or ruined. 

This is the problem. Luckily in 2020/2019, Bls started to want to be different, with new stories based on mafia-like worlds like Trapped, with supernatural storylines like He's coming to me, with the introduction of Korean BLs and Philippine BLs, we're starting to see different tropes soulmate aus, paranormal, fantasy, action, adventure etc. And 2021 already has a line up where most of the storylines veer from this engineering university plot. It's exciting. To think every country is trying to move away from student/ university storylines or give them more depth and change the normal tropes and ideas with them is so exciting and needed. I still love these tropes, but less is more, and a unique plot is even more because it shows BL can be more than just stories, can have depth, can have different versions, and can reach out to a new audience, to other tastes etc. It's been changing, and in 2021 I can't wait to see these new stories come to life. 

It’s Quality not Quantity : 

This is so important, bls are becoming saturated as happy as this makes me; it also suffocated me with bad shows not worth the praise of effort and energy and these aren't put into some shows. In 2020 we got shows like ITSAY where the producers, actors and directors fought and worked so hard to make it happen, they went through obstacles, struggled with days, they pushed through just to make sure ITSAY was created to the best of its ability. This was so incredible, and it made me almost tear up each time I watched the documentaries about how ITSAY came to life.  

Shows like ITSAY and Gaya Sa again that have directors and producers with fixed goals of trying to make a BL show more than just a typical low budget show, putting all their effort, time and ideas to make this mean something is so incredible, so excellent, words can't explain the masterpieces that are created from people who take what they're doing with this genre seriously. And for a long time, we've struggled for people to take this genre seriously, to put in effort and energy to ensure that the story they're telling makes sense, and is done well. 

I'm always harsh because you know sometimes the things needed to make something high quality isn't always available. Some people are genuinely putting everything they can into shows. However I feel like you can tell which shows do that, you can tell when a show is doing all it can to be as great as it possibly could be, for example, the History series; it's a low budget, but it's brilliant, some shows like Love By chance season 2 yes I'm going to keep on calling out this mess, you can tell did not try at all with what they were given, it was a lazy attempt just to feed fan girls and make money. And the thing about things like that is that it's just insulting, to the fans who waited with anticipation only to see the sequel come to life, to the actors who put in the effort and tried to make it be something, it's just disappointing.

 I'm sorry, but like in 2021, we don't want a repeat of that. If you don't want to put in the effort and make something that is high quality despite the low funds or whatever then don't make a show. Other shows are being made and you won't be missed.  Luckily 2021 seems like we will be getting shows of better quality, GMMTV appears like they've invested a lot this year into making BLs be more, we have the incredible Filmania KinnPorsche that is just outstanding for just a 10-minute pilot teaser, we have new channels with budgets and research ready to make new shows like Channel 3, and we have China with new directors wanting to make more danmei donghuas (with incredible quality like TGCF, with excellent live actions like the Untamed) and we have more countries just making good stories and good productions with all they have. So yeah I'm excited to see what shows will be created with this type of energy in 2021.

Let’s make it more risky

So already discussed about unique plotlines and better quality. But one thing as well in the same category as all of these suggestions is BLs being riskier. There are times where BLs try and go overboard and take risks to do new stories that make people uncomfortable, or agitated like Friendzone but the thing is I live for these storylines because it's not just fluffy or tropey stories that are based on novels that need to be told. BL can be so much more. Sometimes bls are stale, and sometimes they try to do riskier messier stories with more depth. And for example, with a company like GMMTV where they have sources and sources of stories they can tell that can be riskier and be different to the pattern they usually follow, we can get such great plots and tales based on new ideas.  I want to see a show like the gifted with bl plotline, the shipper season 2, focused on WayKim,  things without using a book adaptation and without basic plots we needed to settle for. GMMTV is trying to do that now with Not Me coming soon and shows like Friendzone, Baker Boys etc. But I want more riskier stories. Again so that BLs are more than just what they're known for, the same tropes all over and over again, the same ideas and plotlines, but new screenwriters, unique stories not based on books or what's already been made, just new ideas. That's one thing that will pave new ways for BL. Like Give us a historical Thai BL, give us a sageuk Korean show, give us time travelling. I don't know just new ideas, sci-fi, new genres, more psychological thrillers. It could be anything, and it would be so fantastic. Let's see what 2021 offers. 

Let's keep with the PC Energy; 

Shows are being called out for unnecessary toxicity, sexism, bad females that don't get the point that they're beards, problems with non-consent; these need to stop in 2021. I'm not saying we can't have shows that talk about the results and consequences of these kinds of issues, because I find it fascinating when shows take a risk and mention that, like TharnType, but it is 2021 , a new decade, we really need to stop having shows that romanticise topics that aren't okay, emotionally abusive relationships should be seen as emotionally abusive and not praised, character toxicity needs to be called out and shown as that, not as a typical bad boy who needs to be saved trope etc. I don't want to get rid of angsty haters to lovers or flawed characters that need to grow; because those stories are so exciting to watch, and analyse, but don't just add trauma for no reason and not take it seriously, don't just make characters do things without making sure the audience knows this isn't okay. We're getting better, and we're getting more healthier relationships, tropes and conversations, but there's more work to be done in some shows in 2021. Some shows like the shipper in 2020 that had predatory behaviour, incest  (not dealt with properly) which felt like a flashback to the past. 

Longer BLS:

Looking at you Korea, don't mess around you literally can have this genre in your hand,s if you make a worthy production like a typical kdrama it doesn't have to be 16 episodes. Ten is fine, even just 30 minute per episode is okay with us. If you just add more minutes and more depth to the stories, so there are more character flesh outs and more chances for your stories to be developed and not rushed. Then Korean BL will literally take over everything.  There's nothing else to really say, Korea has fantastic plot lines, intriguing characters, fun storylines that make you addicted. Yet, it always feels unsatisfactory and annoying because it's just 10-15 minutes per episode. Make it make sense. I mean there are reasons for it because of budget, and lack of mainstream support but I still think we can just focus on one show, with all the money and effort from the other shows add it to one show, make it long, make it big and create a masterpiece and it will explode. The potential is there, plus with Channels like Channel 3 in Thailand, Bls are really starting to be one hour long and have like 16 or more episodes. That's been a fun journey. But Korea, please join this energy and make more shows that are longer and better. Please??

China it's enough: 

I'm being serious; I don't know how we'll ever pass this problem, but TGCF tried to, and I can see many companies are trying to find a way to overcome this. I know with China it's not fair to demand this it's not a full representation of the Chinese culture or whatever,  but it's irksome; there's a lot of shows that can take our breaths all away in China, so many great shows so please stop ruining that. I'm tired of the PTSD of the shows potentials we lost (The guardian)  because of censorship and other issues, sad forced endings, cutting scenes and deleting episodes like it needs to stop in 2021. Because now, don't pretend that the success of BLs isn't making money and causing the Chinese industry to make more shows like these. But this is my wishful thinking like I said I don't fault writers for trying to be careful with laws, but it is incredibly frustrating when you have a country with the best creativity, storylines, acting etc., and it's ruined by censorship. Let's hope 2021 finds a way to get around this. 

Let the BL animation rain; 2020 saw a remarkable rise to danmei donguas! I'm talking MXTX universe with scum villain, TGCF, Mo dao zu shi and more, so let's keep that energy; what I love about danmei is how unique the plots are we can have transmigration, fantasy, supernatural, mafia etc. it never ends, these stories are incredible, the quality of the animations are so excellent, and the love of the characters always get me. We just need to see more come to life. 

The Brilliance of Meta; 

With ITSAY and Gaya SA and Cherry Magic taking over 2020, meta in BLS have been delicious to watch and analyse, and I want more. This is such a selfish ask, but what can I say, I live for shows filled with meta, with depth, with analysis, with characters that are not just one way on the surface but they tell a different story in subtext. I live for clues, and evidence, and production choices, hidden facial gestures, and objects with meanings;  more symbolisms, more foreshadowings, more dramatic ironies, more character dynamics, more use or other literature/media as bases for the story (like Theory of Love with Flipped and movies). I live for this. It makes a show so much more special and exciting when we're part of the journey; it gives something to do other than just watch the story unfold, we can predict, we can guess, we can analyse, we can just be part of the world of the story and fully understand the message that the writer is trying to tell us. Give us something to look for; clues to watch for, to see where the story is going. Change my mind.  For example with Cherry Magic, the fact that it was already precious and made us smile, was even more enhanced by how relatable it was with the meta, the pain, and the struggles the characters went through was so fascinating to analyse and read into and relate to. That's what I want from more BLs, like it's incredible when any kind of show has meta. I think it's one of the best signs of a great writer and production team. 

More Dimensional Characters; 

Especially villains, we don't want  stale girlfriends who know they're a beard but refuses to let go, we don't want the stale homophobic parent all the time, we don't want the bullies that always try to out people. Give me villains with revenge that makes me question who's in the wrong, reformed villains who become love interests, powerful villains we can't help but hate, but we also love, shocking villains with plot twists we can't see coming (like Lhong from TharnType). Give me depth give me angst, give me plot.

 Villains can make or break a show, they can make the show so exciting and thrilling to watch like we want to see them be discovered or end up where they deserve to go, we like feeling bad for people, and getting to see another side of a villain, we enjoy seeing villains that are different from what we initially thought about them. We like deep villains; we don't always need the same villain, like give us unique ones, give us interesting, weird ones, give us conflicting ones that make us side with them. I want that. Example of a show where there's no actual villain, but they all act like it, is Friendzone and it's so incredible to watch and see how these characters behave, grow, regress etc. I want more characters like this, real, human and makes mistakes. I want more flawed characters with deeper reasons for why they're the way they are. It makes a show very addicting to watch. Maybe that's just me.

The problem with streaming services, YouTube and international fans;

  It's weird international fans need to be taken seriously,  international fans are part of your shows rise to fame, more fame, more success , more projects can be made, and more bls can be seen. Some shows in 2020 lost their chance to shine because of the streaming issues (My engineer), subtitle issues and more. Please stop, please take this into account; try harder, there is always someone internationally willing to help translate or help. Just let us know. Putting shows on Aisplay without subs when you can find a contract that enables you to do so, is a bad move. It's just making you lose because international fans will always find an alternative source to spite you. Like it makes no sense to me, if in 2021 we're still struggling with subs, and where to watch a BL show. It makes no sense because 2020 showed that international fans could break or make a show (2gether) and as much it's privileged for me to say this, international fans should be respected and taken seriously. Luckily Channel 3, GMMTV and others are starting to put more effort into recognising international fans. Finally thank you. Let's see if we improve in 2021. 

This has been a fun rant and discussion to write. I sound so spoilt, and annoying complaining about each of these minor issues, but it really does mean a lot when a BL show tries hard to make their show worth it. Like it might seem like a small issue, with like the skinship, censorship, meta, saturated stories etc., but if BLs just stop focusing on the genre and what other people think this genre should be if people stop focusing on BLs as just BLs and see it as stories of love and representation and more, BLs can be incredible, they can be better than other dramas out there with better budgets, and mainstream support, they can have meaning, and create incredible, incredible one a kind stories. I just want that so badly for this genre. Like I don't want BLs to be seen as just the same tropes, and same issues, and same ideas that we had about them in 2015, we want growth and improvement and effort, this is not just for weird rabid fangirls only, this can be more, it can be for representation, education, for entertainment, and it can be for more people and cause a shift in the media in the world. It really can one day become just as big as many other versions of media like the world of kpop, kdramas etc. in the world.  I don't know, that's what I've always thought it could be. And if that happens, it'll be just a great thing. Anyway Let's defeat 2020, we need to keep this upwards trajectory going, and from the shows coming in 2021, I think it's possible. 

[butterflymar]

DAY 2: FAVORITE BL DRAMA

I have quite a few... I can’t choose just one so bare with me lol

Life Senjou No Bokura

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: One day after school, the serious Ito and the child-like Nishi meet by chance, as each endeavors to remain walking  on the sidewalk`s white line. As time goes by, Ito recognizes he is drawn to Nishi in a way that is new to him. Nishi, for his part, is frustrated that they only get to meet on the sidewalk. Ito decides to act upon his feelings and kisses a surprised Nishi, who agrees they need to walk side by side for a change. The sparks between them are undeniable as their relationship blossoms in high school, survives the college years, and matures into adulthood. A deeply moving work that bears witness to loving partners, whose unchanging feelings must co-exist within a world of changing realities.

My Personal Thoughts: I already wrote a review for this so I am going to re-share some of those thoughts here. This is one that I have watched countless times already. They went by the manga for mostly all of the episodes and I appreciated seeing that. They gave more context for certain details that may have been lost while reading the manga and translated it to screen. I think they depicted the age gaps well too. For 4 episodes only, I feel that they did a great job including the most important aspects. Actually now that I think of it, I would have loved to see more of them in their early 20s depicted on screen because that was like one of there honeymoon phases and I’m a hopeless romantic lol but that’s just a personal preference not complaining. Also, the show stopped at age 40 and they could have gone on throughout there entire lives but I understand why they chose not too. The manga is great as well!!! I think that the main actors depicted beautiful true love very well. They had amazing chemistry. Japanese BL’s have that special spark about them that I love. I also loved that it showed there relationship from high school till there later years. I don’t see that a lot with BL’s. They usually just stick to one time period. The aspect about them being connected by a line in relation to there love was a nice touch as well. I am glad that it has a happy ending as well. This is a pretty quick one to watch and a great one at that!!! If you haven’t watched it yet, I would highly recommend it!!!

I Told Sunset About You 

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: Teh and Oh-aew were best friends until a boyhood line of reasoning turned them into rivals. Years later as they're preparing for university admissions, both pursuing interests in the field of Communication Arts, the two meet in a Chinese language class. Their reunion awakens complicated and unstable feelings.

My Personal Thoughts: Same as above, I already wrote a review for this so I am going to re-share some of those thoughts here. This is DEFINITELY one of my top BL shows of the year 2020. This is such a beautiful masterpiece of a show!!! I remember when the preview trailer first came out… I was already hooked!!! I was on the lookout for it and it did not disappoint me one bit when it finally started. I looked forward to seeing it every week. It made me feel all of the emotions. I was up here sitting in my room crying over everything. I don’t think any other BL has made me this emotional before in my life. The two lead actors really DELIVERED!!! I could feel every single stare, every single body movement, and every single touch. You could cut the TENSION with a knife!!! No one couldn’t tell me that there wasn’t a magnetic true love between these two. I know this sounds cliche but it's like they were destined to be together from when they were childhood friends. Also, I would love to see them in future projects!!! The cinematography in this show is TOP FREAKIN NOTCH!!! Every single scene is just so beautifully shot. The cinematography alone makes me want to cry lol I saw somewhere that someone said the filming of the show reminded them of an indie film and I totally agree!!! The writing and directing on this show was impeccable to me!!! No cringy dialogue and every single line served its purpose well. This is movie grade writing. I also wanted to quickly just say that I loved the attention and callback to details throughout like with the tutoring book that Teh made for Oh-aew that was left empty by the end of episode 4, the flower that was supposed to be colored the same as Tan’s garment but Teh colored it red because he was thinking of Oh-aew, the rubbing of Oh-aew’s back when he sniffles, the references to Teh’s favorite actor, and the use of Chinese phrases to get meaning across. I could go on and on but wow I just loved how they really connected all of the details throughout. I can’t wait for Season 2!!!

Theory of Love

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: Third is a filmology major and a member of the Savage Team along with his best friends Two, Bone, and Khai, but he has a secret. Third has been secretly in love with Khai for years. For three years, he has kept his secret love in his heart, silently supporting and loving Khai while knowing there is absolutely no future between them since Khai is as straight as a streetlight pole and also an absolute player. To make matters worse, Khai has a "no dating friends" policy. How long can Third love Khai silently while watching Khai bring a different girl home every night? Third has tried to see Khai as just a friend. But has failed time and time again. Because as easy as it is to fall in love, to stop is just as hard.  Maybe even harder. That is until Third learns a secret that breaks his heart completely. But when Third decides to stop, Khai decides to start.

My Personal Thoughts: As sad as this show can make me feel at times, I love rewatching it. I still to this day think that it is one of the most well written BL’s that I have seen. Everything flows nicely and everything connects. Your not left wondering how you got from point A to point B. I thought the show had great character development especially when it came to Khai’s character towards the end of series. I know a lot of people had mixed feelings about his character due to how careless and dare I say stupid he acted at times but if he can make the audience hate him that much as a character... I would say he is doing something right!!! Gun’s acting never fails to amaze me!!! He really is one of the best actors I have seen. I know he had to be drained from all of that crying that he did throughout the show though lol It just goes to show that when you truly love someone you can’t just stop what you are feeling inside that easily no matter how the other person feels about you or treats you. As the old saying goes, love is blind. I also loved the friend group as well and Two and Bones side stories with the teacher and crush from school. They added to the shows greatness and didn’t take away from it. The friendship dynamics throughout the show was I feel something that really kept me engaged. The cast acted well together. There was no awkwardness or hesitation. I feel everyone bought there best for this drama. They incorporated the movie references so cleverly and I love how the title of each episode was the title of a real romance film. Just the overall theme of film was very intriguing to me. This drama left me filled with heartache and a rollercoaster of emotions but the ending is worth it!!!

HIStory3: Make Our Days Count

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: At first glance, high schoolers Xiang Hao Ting and Yu Xi Gu appear to be polar opposites: While Xiang Hao Ting is an outgoing, hot-headed extravert and some-time bully, Yu Xi Gu prefers to keep a low profile and focus on his schoolwork. They seem bound for totally different futures – the bookish Yu Xi Gu looks destined for academic success, while life is just a long popularity contest for Xiang Hao Ting. But a quirk of fate – and a crucial intervention by a female schoolmate – results in the two young men’s paths crossing. But there is more to both young men than first meets the eye. Xiang Hao Ting was not always this way. He started out as a perfect student until he discovered the joys of going off the rails. And Yu Xi Gu has a reason for being so aloof and studious: His parents died in a traffic accident while he was younger, and he is being fostered by his aunt. As such, he works hard to get good grades in an effort to win a scholarship and ease the financial burden on his relatives. Yu Xi Gu also works part-time at a convenience store, where his manager Liu Zhi Gang has developed a crush on a man he has met at the gym. Back at school, meanwhile, Yu Xi Gu and Xiang Hao Ting find themselves drawn together, and passions ignite. The former notices that he has the unique ability to bring Yu Xi Gu out of his shell – and becomes intent on melting his cold-as-ice exterior. What will happen when their two worlds collide? And can love be the catalyst that helps bring these two unlikely students together – as their high school days draw to a close?

My Personal Thoughts: I will stand by this notion for all of my days but this show is one of the best shows I have seen PERIOD!!! Not even best BL shows I have seen but just in general. It highkey saddens me that it is rated at an 8.1 right now on MyDramaList due to how it ended when other than that... it’s a top notch show. This was one that I watched as it was airing and I would get excited to see it every week. My clown self should have known by the title “Make Our Days Count” that some mess was about to occur but I didn’t pick up on it. Now, I just disregard the last episode (WE DON’T KNOW HER!!!). You can just tell that they had a great budget for this series. The production was on point. It had great cinematography, great storylines, and it felt realistic too. The main couples acting was OFF THE CHARTS AMAZING. I loved the whole opposites attract thing going on. Although the show was set in high school... it almost didn’t feel like it nor did it have those typical clichés going on. I liked how it dealt with topic of LGBTQ+ acceptance as well. I wasn’t so sure about the side couples relationship at first but I grew to love them as time went on. One last thing I wanted to point out was that even though I am always looking for a happy ending... I learned from this show that not everyone can get a happy ending. That’s not how life works sadly. In real life, there have been a lot of people who were truly in love and lost there partners tragically. Although it may be hard to accept the outcome, it is something that happens in real life. This is a drama that you appreciate even more as time goes on. It truly is a gem of a series!!!

TharnType

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: Type Thiwat is a handsome freshman with a passion for football and spicy food. Although he’s a friendly boy, he hates gay people because, in his childhood, he was molested by a man. His life turns upside down when the new academic year of college brings along a charismatic roommate, Tharn Kirigun. Tharn is a gorgeous, compassionate music major, who is also openly gay. When Type learns this, he is determined to make Tharn leave the dorm, as he won't live with a gay person. Tharn is equally determined not to give into Type's homophobic tantrums. With a gay guy and a homophobic guy that have to share a small space together for the rest of the year — what can possibly be the outcome of their story? Hatred? Or maybe love?

My Personal Thoughts: *Goes to hide in a corner* I know this drama is problematic and controversial as hell but it’s like a train wreck that you can’t turn  away from. What truly carries the show I feel is the chemistry between MewGulf. I don’t think I would have enjoyed the series as much if other actors were cast in those roles. They just exude confidence, passion, love, and lust. In terms of the storyline, I found it to be a chaotic occurrence of situations where I just had to know what was going to go on next. Everything that occurred had me intrigued for the next episode and so on and so forth. I loved Type’s character development. One quick thing I want to touch on was I know there were a lot of problematic things that happened which I will touch on at a later date but one thing I wish people were more understanding of was Type’s outbursts, thoughts, and feelings in certain situations. He was a victim of sexual assault so I felt the way he handled certain things was in response to what he had gone through as child and I think some viewers kind of missed that and were almost too harsh on him. Everyone processes and deals with trauma differently. This show went through so many twists and turns and I honestly lived for it especially the shocker towards the end of the series. I didn’t see that one coming at all!!! Despite all of its flaws, this show still holds a special place in my heart.

Honorable Mention:

Cherry Magic: As of today, this show has 4 episodes left and I think I am just going to come out and say that THIS IS MY FAVORITE BL OF THE YEAR!!! It’s a beautiful Japanese BL and I rewatch the old episodes while I wait for new ones to come out alot. It’s such a fluffy, heartwarming, and precious Bl series!!! I love it to pieces!!!

[hoodwinkd1]

Your Eyes Whispered Ch 16

Ch 15 here.

Here it is! The final chapter!! So much love to all of you that have followed along with this story <3

Chapter 16: you are in love. true love.

Reality hit Eris in the face, harder than any bitch slap.

They hadn’t left his chambers for almost an entire day, legs tangled and words whispered over breakfast, lunch, dinner, and tea. Eris was ready to hand over his title and power for the opportunity to spend the rest of life like that, with no interruptions and no one around except for her.

Unfortunately, leaving the Court in the hands of someone random seemed ethically dubious and potentially problematic. Equally unfortunately, his stubborn mate loved her job and actually cared about her students. For both of these reasons, Eris found himself kissing Rhia goodbye on her doorstep just before midnight.

“Two whole days apart,” she teased, drawing patterns on his tunic with her finger. “How will we ever survive.”

Eris ducked to kiss her head. “You shouldn’t joke. I might die.”

He watched her lean against the door frame, remembering that neither of them had gotten enough sleep last night. “I’d really rather you didn’t.”

“I’d feel much better if you simply moved in,” Eris grumbled. They both froze. “Joking. That was definitely a joke.”

“You shouldn’t joke,” Rhia teased. “I might die. Leave, before I drag you upstairs and lock you in my room.”

Eris pouted. “Don’t threaten me with a good time. Good night.”

They exchanged one last kiss, so sweet and gentle that Eris’ heart broke and mended itself as their lips parted.

Although her absence ached, Eris had to admit that a full night of sleep called to him as soon as he winnowed back into his chambers. Rhia brought out so many wonderful qualities in him, but falling asleep during one of the countless meetings tomorrow might not reflect well on his leadership potential.

----

Water dripped from her hair, sliding down between her shoulder blades. Rhia knew she should grab her hair oils, knew she should comb out some of the remaining tangles, or she would regret it in a few hours. But his scent teased her, pulling her from the bathroom and into her bedroom.

Strange how she thought the days apart would drag on forever. She felt like it had only been a moment as her eyes scanned his body, hands behind his head and long legs draped across her bed.

“Take your time, love,” Eris smirked.

Rhia snapped her gaze back to his face. “What?”

Eris moved in a way that heated her blood. He sat up, arms coming down to cross his chest. His eyes flashed in a way that screamed predator, but for once, she was completely fine with being prey. “Stare at me for as a long as you want. I’ll wait patiently for you to finish.”

“Cheeky,” Rhia replied, a flush blooming from her cheeks and down her neck. She had never been more grateful for her dark skin, hiding the pink tinge that would have jumped out on a face as pale as her beloved’s. “You speak of patience; I’ll just have to test that out.”

She loosened her grip on the towel, letting it fall to the floor.

His reaction did not disappoint. She watched his pupils dilate as his eyes narrowed. Rhia bit her lip at how his pulse raced, one vein in his neck standing out in the most tempting manner.

“Stare as long as you wish.” Rhia took two steps backward, leaning against the doorframe of the bathroom. “I’ll wait.”

She turned around, making sure he wasn’t deprived of any view, before stepping fully into the bathroom and reaching above the sink for her favorite, lavender scented oil. As her body stretched, she counted to five in her head.

Rhia didn’t even get to three. Eris launched himself from the bed, appearing behind her so quickly she let out a giggle. He caught her eye in the mirror and raised an eyebrow. She took it for the question it was, giving him a quick nod and leaning back into his warmth. There was something so infuriatingly dirty about the feel of his soft pajamas against her naked skin.

Eris raised his hands slowly, letting them drift up and down her sides, raising goosebumps and her heartbeat. At the same time, he dropped his head to press light kisses to her neck, her shoulder, her spine, a million small points on her body.

Rhia set down the bottle of oil preemptively, knowing she was about one kiss from smashing it on the ground in a fit of passion.

“Hold on,” he murmured against her skin. “We can’t have your hair drying out tomorrow, can we?” He snatched it from her, pouring a small amount into his palm.

She groaned at the feeling of his hands in her hair. While his talented fingers felt like heaven, she really would prefer to feel them somewhere else.

“Oh? And where would that be?” Eris asked. She flushed again, realizing she’d spoken out loud. “Tell me what you want.”

Of course Eris was a talker in bed. He never managed to shut up normally, so Rhia should have seen this coming.

She turned in his arms, running her hands up his chest. Letting her lower back rest against the sink, she looked at him and tilted her head to the side in a silent challenge. “Touch me.”

Eris leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss on her lips. “I am touching you.” His left hand drifted from her side to her stomach, tracing circles that never landed where she wanted him. “You’re going to have to be a bit more specific.”

She sighed against his mouth, savoring the warmth and safety of this moment. There was no fear, no bad memories, nothing dragging her from pleasure. “Lower.”

He complied, circling down to her hips, running his knuckles against them. “Good?”

She was good. Surprisingly good.

Suspiciously good.

“Yes.” She kissed his shoulder, right below his neck. His shirt would have to go soon. “Keep going.”

He moved his hand and ---

Rhia shot up, clutching the sheets around her. No longer in the bathroom, but back in her bed where she’d fallen asleep.

A fucking wet dream. Cauldron, Eris found new ways to make her feel like an adolescent even when he wasn’t around. And now she had to go through the next day and a half thinking about him, missing him even more than before.

-----

“Fuck,” Eris cursed, jumping out of bed and running into his closet. “Fuckity, fucking fuck.”

He was running late. So late that he would have no time to plan out his outfit, brush his hair, eat some damn breakfast, or shower. And as much as he wanted to do all those things, he actually needed that shower right now.

Preferably a cold one.

While he usually prided himself on his body’s exceptionally accurate clock, rarely relying on alarms or servants to wake up on time, his stupid brain had kept him unconscious this morning. All because of a stupid dream.

“You’re a dirty pervert,” Eris growled to himself, grabbing a boring black suit that felt like something Rhysand would wear. Thinking of the Night Court calmed down his burning desire, at least for the moment.

His imagination had played a glorious scene for him, ending with him taking Rhia on the large countertop in his bathroom. Eris shoved the image of her out of his head, head back against the mirror as her back arched towards him, scrambling for some semblance of control as he stalked to his first meeting.

He’d dealt with frustration before, but nothing comparable to this. Eris hadn’t wanted to think about her in that way since their night together. She had set a clear boundary, one that he would never dream of crossing, even in his own head.

Except he literally did dream of crossing it. Eris snarled under his breath as he strode into the chamber, covering up his shame and anger with a mask of disdain. The group of merchants waiting for his arrival had done nothing to earn his ire yet, but the elitist males certainly deserved it.

“My Lord.” One of the eldest Fae at the table, Cephalus, greeted him as the rest of the guests stood and bowed quickly. “I hope you can forgive us for beginning the meal without you.”

Eris couldn’t have cared less about breakfast. “Fine. What business?”

Cephalus waited until Eris sat at the head of the table. “We’ve completed an inventory of the remaining, undamaged farmlands across the territory. While the designated areas for livestock and wheat can produce sufficient levels of product, we have sustained heavy losses in the Eastern regions by the coast.” He paused for a moment.

“Must I sit through an agricultural lesson?” Eris snarked, summoning a mug of coffee. “Get to the point.”

The old Fae held his tongue, although irritation danced across his face. Cephalus nodded to the male sitting directly on his right, someone Eris had never had the displeasure of meeting.

“We’ve created a list of produce that will be affected,” the stranger continued, his voice pitchy with nerves. “As well as other areas that might work as replacements while farmers heal the land.” He held up a long roll of parchment, eyes downcast.

Eris snatched it from him. His eyes scanned the list quickly, groaning internally. Based on the mention of grapes and barley, most of his favorite alcohols were in danger of becoming rare commodities.  “Have you spoken with anyone from these towns? Or my Treasury?”

Cephalus leaned forward. “The Treasury has sent over some preliminary budgets that you may review, but I believe are reasonable.” He paused then, tilting his head. “What would we need to speak to the towns about?”

“Taking over their land.” Eris sipped his coffee. Lukewarm. He sent a shiver of flame across the ceramic. “Have you even checked if the land is available?”

The male from earlier finally looked Eris in the eye. “We already checked for any buildings or development. The land is clear.”

He’d heard enough. These merchants were either stupid or simply had their heads shoved up their asses. “Let me rephrase. Until you have explicit permission from the members of the town to use their land and a fair agreement that reinvests profits into whatever they desire, you may not move forward with agricultural efforts.”

Cephalus cleared his throat. “If I may, that process might take too long. The land is currently serving no purpose and--”

Eris held a hand up. “I didn’t ask. Nothing on this list is essential enough to warrant stealing. If you’re worried about timing, make the agreements extremely favorable to the people living there.”

He grabbed the second list, the one with the list of towns, and held it up to the group. “Surely between the seven of you, someone must have travelled to each of these places before. Go back, or invite a representative to meet here.”

The male from before failed to hide his displeasure at Eris’ command, likely anticipating the additional work these negotiations would require. Eris really didn’t care. The merchant class had flourished under Beron’s rule at the expense of the other Autumn citizens, taking what they pleased and enforcing bullshit agreements that stole resources from small villages.

He finished the meeting after addressing some of the others’ concerns, working on a plan to upgrade the Navy’s presence on the Eastern Coast to protect continental traders from various threats.

Gerwin waited for him in the hall outside. He fell in step as Eris took off towards the training rooms, eager to work off the tension that had been building since the moment he woke up.

“Who was that dark-haired male with Cephalus?” Eris asked.

Gerwin glanced over his shoulder. “Jarod something. He claims his father worked with Beron before dying during Am--, during her reign, as the head of several Royal vineyards. Jyn looked into him and a couple other new faces when they claimed leadership roles.”

“So he’s clean?”

Gerwin snorted. “Would you care either way?”

Eris scowled. “He just pisses me off with his elitism. Probably overly pretentious about wine. too.”

“You’re pretentious about wine,” Gerwin remarked. They’d reached the training ring and began to arm themselves for a proper spar.

Eris chuckled, remembering his conversation with Sofi and Rhia a few weeks ago. “Maybe I’ll test his knowledge.”

“Try him for treason if his wines aren’t up to standard.” Gerwin tossed him a practice blade. “Let’s see how that pretentiousness holds up in battle, huh?”

---

Somehow, Rhia survived another night of scandalous dreams and waking up to a frustratingly empty bed. Her mind and body seemed to be at war with one another, pushing her on a nauseating pendulum between wanting Eris and despising physical touch.

Not all physical touch, though. Really, Rhia just wanted to have him in her arms again. She had called herself all sorts of names, a sap, a clinger, a cliché mate. Sofi had laughed, asking if Rhia would let her cynicism get in the way of her heart.

So although it felt fast and Rhia felt pathetic, she resolved to have a conversation with Eris the moment he arrived in her kitchen that night. The conversation. The moment he arrived.

“I’m moving in.”

She probably should’ve started with “hello”. At her words, Eris’ eyes widened and he coughed on air.

Rhia smiled sheepishly, holding her hand out to take his coat. “Sorry. Hello, how was your day?”

“No, no let’s go back a second,” Eris insisted. “What did you say?”

“Give me your coat and let’s sit like civilized Fae.” Rhia held her hand out further, waiting until he complied.

He watched her hang it up as he sat himself at the table. “Is this a tea or a wine conversation?”

“Wine. Definitely wine.”

Eris magicked a bottle onto the table. “I’ve been told I’m a bit pretentious, but I do believe that tonight deserves an especially good bottle. Now please, put me out of my misery and repeat what you said.”

Rhia scrunched her nose. “I think I’d like to move into the palace. Part time, at first.” She waited for those words to sink in, focusing her gaze on the two glasses filled with red liquid.

“And?” Eris prompted.

“And what? Do you approve?”

He laughed. “Of course I approve. I thought I made it very clear that I’d prefer to never leave your side ever again.” They both took a sip, and he continued. “What changed your mind? Are you sure you want to leave this place?”

“It wouldn’t be permanent, not at first.” Rhia swirled the wine, once, twice. “I wouldn’t do that to my students. But I thought about my life, and I want to do something risky for the first time in awhile.” She looked at him, smiling at how much better she felt simply looking at him. “I want to build a life with you, with your people, in the capital.”

“As much as I love to hear that, the burden shouldn’t be entirely on you,” Eris replied. “Just because I’m High Lord--”

Rhia interrupted. “Yes, it should be. But not because you’re High Lord. Eris, you’ve fought and bled for your role, and I see how hard you work now to make this Court a safer place. I want to do that with you.” Her hands shook with emotion as she reached out to take his. “Whatever reason the Cauldron had, I’d like to believe that it made me your mate to help you. I love this town and these people, but it’s not enough for me, not when I know how much good I can do for thousands of others.”

“This Court doesn’t deserve you.” He squeezed her fingers. “I obviously do not deserve you.”

“Eris--”

He held one finger up. “I’m not stupid. I’ll take all the help I can get, especially if it keeps you in my life. I just- I never imagined we could get here.”

She steadfastly ignored the tears that threatened to show. “And where is here?”

“I have a partner.” The wine lay forgotten as he gripped both her hands. “I never thought you would even consider speaking to me, and now you wish to live with me, work with me.”

“And love you,” she added. “Don’t forget that.”

Tears began to fall on both of their faces, but neither moved to wipe them away, unwilling to let go. The moment seemed to echo, across time and space, putting together all the pieces of their relationship that they had spent so long building. All of the truths, all of the sacrifices, all of the pain lined up to form a picture Rhia could now see, like a painting that only made sense once you took a step backwards.

“I accept the bond. I accept you .”

There was no exchanging of food. There was no shift into primal protectiveness. And there was certainly no lust-driven madness.

But there was a bridge. There were golden strings of light and music and joy that pulled her towards him, a stronger pull than gravity.

Eris let out a sigh and a shudder and a wave of warm emotions that Rhia could taste. “I’m going to kiss you now. And possibly never stop.”

As he shoved his chair out of the way, Rhia stood to meet him. As their lips touched, she opened for him completely.

As the bond permanently snapped into place, she let go of her fears that they would never progress physically and she would always remain broken. None of it mattered, not when the cruelest prince of Autumn found a way to love her so fully.

------

thank you for reading!

tag list: @moonbeamfenrys @qamariana

[hetacon]

Midnight Stellar in the Making

Word Count: 2,400

Pairing: Logicality

Warning: Food mention (Let me know if I missed anything!)

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Summary: Patton knew that his boyfriend had always liked to work at the coffee shop down the street from their dorm but with all day essays, Logan ended up having to leave, only to spend the rest of the night writing at their little desk in the corner of their room, Patton tucked into bed. He had to spend some time away from his papers to make himself coffee at around 4 in the morning and it was a pain. With this in mind, Patton had a thought. What if Logan could’ve had somewhere to spend all-nighters where he didn’t have to spend time making coffee?

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Note: This is my Sanders Sides exchange gift for @oh-theatre based off of the concept I made in “Peanut Butter Cookies and Meaningful Conversations!” (Which you can find here though it’s not essential for this one!) It was a lot of fun to make so I hope you enjoy it too!

______________________________

“What I will definitely not miss is making coffee for all-nighters.”

That one comment set off an entire chain reaction for Patton and Logan’s lives and it was honestly astonishing how Patton had managed to create a successful local business with his college boyfriend.

Logan had made that comment in regards to them graduating from college. Patton had managed to make his schedule work out just fine but Logan’s was a little heavier than he expected, thus the relief from not having to pull more all-nighters.

Patton knew that his boyfriend had always liked to work at the coffee shop down the street from their dorm but with all day essays, Logan ended up having to leave, only to spend the rest of the night writing at their little desk in the corner of their room, Patton tucked into bed. He had to spend some time away from his papers to make himself coffee at around 4 in the morning and it was a pain. With this in mind, Patton had a thought. What if Logan could’ve had somewhere to spend all-nighters where he didn’t have to spend time making coffee?

The plan for a late night café was a plan a couple years in the making. Logan had gone on to focus on an ordinary desk job that got the bills paid, Patton was doing botanical research, and their lives went on as normal. While Patton wouldn’t have been able to afford much more than an apartment on his own, Logan’s parents had given them enough money to buy a decent house and the two got married sometime within that span. Any time that Patton wasn’t working though, he was researching, drawing up plans, making mock menus, trying out new recipes for pastries he’d enjoyed as a kid, and any work in between before he even considered bringing it up to Logan.

He knew his husband wouldn’t judge the idea or laugh but he might be a bit skeptical and wave it off, calling it nothing more than an unstable or impossible passion project that Patton had gotten attached to.

“So what you are telling me is that you want to put time and money into a late night café based off of a comment I made two and a half years ago at our college graduation?” Logan asked, raising an eyebrow at Patton.

“Yeah, I just... I don’t know, it got into my head and I just.. I couldn’t stop thinking about it!” Patton tried to explain, grinning nervously. “It’s stupid, I know, I just thought it could be worth a shot to bring it up...? Gosh, I don’t know, maybe this wasn’t worth it.”

“No no, hold on a minute.” Logan raised a hand, looking through the color code divided binder in front of him, reading through the laminated pages briefly. He took out a few sketches and designs Patton had spent an entire week making, running a finger over the lines slowly as his lips moved silently, mouthing words as he thought. “You’ve put a lot of effort into this, haven’t you love?” Logan finally asked, looking back up to Patton.

“Yeah, I suppose you could say that,” Patton laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“This is a wonderful idea. From what I’m briefly looking at, you’ve gotten a lot of major factors taken into account and they’ve been well-researched from what I’m gathering. Do you mind if I take a week or so to look over it and maybe work on some notes and thoughts about this?” Logan smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling in the slightest of ways that made Patton want to kiss the living daylights out of him.

“No, not at all, I don’t mind!!” Patton shouted, bouncing up and down with a broad grin overtaking his face. “You’re the best Logie, I couldn’t have picked a better husband!!” With that, Patton was tackling Logan to the couch, kissing him.

Logan spent a week reading through it as he had asked for and came back with some further research of his own, thankfully aided by his degree in business. It was therefore, an actual idea on the table rather than a starry-eyed vision in Patton’s head. They spent the next year looking further into it before Patton quit his job to devote himself to the café work full-time.

“I’m home,” Logan called from the front door as he took off his coat, taking a deep breath in.

“Hi sweetheart, how was work?” Patton asked as he came into Logan’s field of view, working on folding macaron batter, coconut if Logan remember correctly from their discussion last night.

“Fine, though it went slower than I wanted it to,” Logan sighed, rolling his head back to release the tension there. “Is there anything I can do to help you out right now?” He went over to where Patton was standing and kissed him gently, Patton happily returning the kiss.

“Yes actually! If you wouldn’t mind, could you make the filling I’m testing out for this batch? I have the rough instructions on the counter near the fridge,” Patton told him to which he nodded.

“Of course. How have the other recipes been going today?” Logan asked as he put on an apron, washing his hands before getting to work on gathering the ingredients his husband had listed on the post-it note.

“Well, the vanilla ones turned out well though a couple were a little messy looking. They taste good though! The mint chocolate ones tasted awful, I think I forgot to add something to the filling because I tasted pure Dutch cocoa powder. The worst thing I’ve ever put in my mouth. The others were decent but I made a few notes on fixing them so I want to try it out tomorrow. I’m just thankful I can make these in small batches, we’d be flooded in macarons otherwise!” Patton laughed as they worked.

“Are there any left that I can try?”

“Yeah, just be careful of the mint ones!”

They worked like that for a while, chatting as they went along with their day.

For Patton’s 25th birthday, Logan had gotten him an espresso machine to try out and while he had originally fretted over the price, Patton was soon working out new drinks that were ready for Logan to taste when he woke up in the morning for work. It was a little harder to gauge than pastries, since Logan was very grumpy and his comments weren’t exactly put together well due to it being his first coffee fix, but later in the day, Logan was able to give him more thorough notes on how his productivity was affected by it compared to his average cup of coffee. Patton of course made it a point to perfect his hot chocolate recipes as well.

Trying all sorts of recipes had been fun and with a box of handwritten recipes (mainly for the aesthetic) done and tucked away into one of the kitchen cabinets, design and theme planning came next. Logan had dabbled in a bit of graphic design while he was getting his degree so he was put up to that task when he had time after work. Patton had more of an eye for colors than he did though (which made sense considering his blue-yellow color blindness) so with a bit of input from Patton, they had a working idea of how they wanted to have everything looking.

A lot of the budgeting and finance aspects were taken care of throughout the whole process and after a year and a half, with a solid plan in place for nearly every aspect, they were finally ready for a really big step that would make this official. Location scouting and a name for the café were the only things left. They’d been having trouble with the name but figured that they’d come up with something when the time was right. In the meantime though, location scouting occupied their time.

Many of the buildings were gorgeous, Patton could picture each making a beautiful site for a café. He was a bit hesitant about prices, as he had always been prone to as a broke college student, but Logan assured him that they had enough money to work with. All they had to do was find the one they liked.

“We have one more place in mind in the morning, right Logie?” Patton asked with a yawn, pulling the blankets closer in his half-awake state.

“Mhm, none of them quite feel like the one,” Logan said softly, taking off his and Patton’s glasses and placing them on the nightstand before pulling Patton close.

“I’m sure we’ll make whichever one we choose absolutely perfect, just like we always do,” Patton mumbled out before he’d fallen asleep.

Patton saw Logan’s jaw drop as soon as they stepped inside, his eyes fixed on the rainbow of colors being scattered across the room from the huge glass dome directly over their heads, giving a perfect view of the sky above them.

This was the one, Patton knew this was the one as soon as Logan muttered out “We’ll see the stars.”

“Well what an absolutely stellar idea!” Patton joked with a light laugh to his voice.

Logan turned to him, snapping his fingers. “Midnight Stellar.”

“What?”

“The Midnight Stellar Café,” Logan explained, his pupils blown out wider than Patton had ever seen them, pure and unadulterated joy overtaking Logan’s irises as he grabbed Patton’s hands, pulling him in for a passionate kiss before twirling him around.

“Oh goodness!” Patton giggled, letting Logan lead them in an imaginary dance. He had never seen this before, Logan hadn’t ever looked so excited except for when Patton had proposed to him. He looked just as in love with the place as the subtle glint Patton saw in his eyes every day. It took his breath away. This was happening. He may have started this project out of his own wants but with the way Logan was looking and feeling right now, Patton could tell that Logan wanted it even more. Patton couldn’t possibly deny the man twirling him around in silly little circles, the rainbows of the glass ceiling catching in Logan’s hair and making him look luminous.

Logan was right about the stars, there was a perfect view, a wonderful stretch of the Milky Way striking right through the center of the skylight. It became their constant companion as they worked on getting everything ready. Lots of construction took place before they had sold their apartment and moved into an upstairs portion of the building. Luckily this building had a place for them to live in, a staircase connected to the back of the future café leading up to their new home. After the move and Logan quitting his job now, they devoted themselves full time to setting up everything. Painting, furniture, and the kitchen setup took a couple weeks but eventually it was all done and with Patton picking out some plants to add as well as various other decorations, it was ready. This was a reality.

Patton looked over the café from the front door, smiling to himself. A cluster of large black tables took up the middle of the room with various smaller ones lining the floor-to-ceiling windows. The walls were painted cobalt blue blending into indigo towards the ceiling, hand-painted constellation patterns covering the walls. Each table had a couple outlets imbedded into the sides of them, soft white lighting illuminated the café. The counter looked pristine and the pastry case would soon be showcasing months of recipe experimentation in the works. Of course, a glance up gave Patton another look at the now familiar Milky Way over their heads. By far though, Patton’s favorite part was the secluded little corner with beanbag chairs, a couple bookshelves full of some classic books he and Logan had enjoyed reading throughout their lives, and fairylights and plants lining the walls of the corner. As he finished his look over the café, Logan wrapped his arm around Patton’s shoulder and pulled him in close, kissing his temple.

The café opening honestly wasn’t too promising. No one showed up that first night. Patton watched the door insistently for hours. Logan at some point had to remind Patton that they were working on strange hours, since most people aren’t up and outside as late as 3 in the morning. The first 8 hours, from 10 PM to 6 AM, were the most boring and agonizing Patton had ever spent. Luckily though, business picked up. Within a few weeks, they had a few regulars, people who would pop in every few days or so. Some people would get something to eat before their graveyard shifts, some weren’t able to sleep because of insomnia, and some people just liked the night better. Patton enjoyed getting to talk with anyone that was willing to have a conversation with him while Logan managed the counter more often than not.

Getting off of their previous sleep schedules had been strange and working in the early hours of the morning had its drawbacks but overall, this was definitely not going to be something Patton would come to regret. Waking up in the afternoon with his husband, running errands while stores were still open, baking in the late evening after dinner, and watching as the stars started to peek out at them as they got the café ready for the night became such a simple joy for Patton. Watching Logan’s satisfaction every time he interacted with the customers or the two figured out a new recipe or when he helped someone with calculus homework while Patton took over the counter proved that this was the right fit.

Sure, it was unconventional. It might not have been anywhere near where either of them thought their lives would take them in their mid to late twenties. And maybe it had just started from a simple offhand comment by an entirely too tired college student.

For Patton, everything figured itself out just how it ought to be, and he was content.

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Taglist: @artissijules, @its-the-cat-queen, @myyoutubecorner, @virgils-paranoia, @anotheregofanficblog, @marshmallow-the-panda, @oh-theatre, @sanderssidesgiftxchange

[onf-headcanons]

OK AS AN  ANIMATION STORYBOARD MAJOR CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS SCENE??

A/n : CONTAINS SPOILER SO YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Pay attention to their glasses, the amount of the liquor. And sorry if this is too sudden or you think its not big. I just wanna show that the show actually did pay attention to details in some sense. Discussions are welcome

This was the part they did a toast. And pay attention to how the amount of alcohol in glass reflects character personality. 

At this point I will try to elaborate but then because some characters not yet has a moment to shine yet compared to 94line so, it will be mixed with irresponsible assumptions

Carefully looks at Seunghyun (Hyojin) and Taejun (Changyoon) ‘s glass and also relate with how sober they are compared to others.

It perfectly relates and that is some good character personality show dont tell right there. 

It shows us well enough that Seunghyun and Taejun are quite similar people, nice, observant, caring and also sensitive. At first glance, Seunghyun is the action taking empath type while Taejun is the rational practical type. But, this scene shows that they both care the group in the same way. They did not get themselves too drunk so that at least someone is sober to clean or back things up. It is also an indication in the group they both are observant and caring, (of course not sure if they are worried if they drank they might spill?). 

It relates more because Seunghyun is the first person who helped Alex more obvious, like everybody sees it. I mean look at early episode, Seunghyun is the one who “butt” his head in to calm his roommates when they are fighting. But I guess because he got close with her very naturally like a comrade during the beginning. And since Seunghyun was the one majorly constantly seen with and standing on alex’s side in the beginning, it is easy for everyone to later assume and predict, that Seunghyun will always stand at one’s side should you successfully get close to him. So that is the reason why Sanghae/Seungjoon says “ I never coupled/shipped you and Alex tho.”, because he is generally nice to everyone. (not in a bad way) (Also to add, lol in this webdrama, Sanghae is older than Seunghyun, I laughed like a madwoman this is not possible not funny imo lol)

And then Taejun in a more shadow type, my guess he is the kind of person who need the other party to prove their worth in his heart for his kindness as it is not his thing to butt in. But once he reach out, he will be the one to stand in front of you should you met any danger. He is not cold hearted mind you, previous episode and this episode successfully proved that. Take example Inguk/Minkyun when he wanna go get more drinks and he quickly become alert worrying the younger one might stumble. Should Taejun’s caring trait is totally taken out, he will be drunk af and Seunghyun be the one to offer to join In Guk.

In conclusion, you might know and sees Seunghyun’s deed but not necessarily sees Taejun’s with your eyes. And I can totally understand why them both are to “easily” fall in love.

You might ask, but Sanghae? his drink was full tho? My guess is he took a sip and then got drunk, the type that is weak against alcohol. lol

Some more irresponsible assumptions,

Inguk and Baekho are the type to indulge to their feelings and “desires”/passion because they just “do whatever they want” that fits their current agenda.TThe type that pours their effort without holding back. But mind you its not like they dont care other people, both are also observant in their way,. Its just I guess the budget, time and editing wise could not make it. And also I will not think the script is a script should they write it like otome game in Japan where everyone has a crush with Alex. That is unrealistic and it feels like character does not have a life in their own world (kinda like they just conveniently exist to push plot, ahem sorry i got carried away.)

Sanghae would be the type that is also observant but its not as powerful level as Seunghyun and Taejun. He did gives that I live in my own world vibe but currently I do felt he is like the magician/prophet if you put character archetype trope on him.Like he spout weird stuffs but it wraps up later in another way.

ok i better stop here before i get waaaaay ahead of myself.

but then I do hope other characters get more focus and highlight to shine.

ONF FIGHTING! LOOKING FORWARD FOR NEXT EP

[biaswreckermagnet]

Fate: The Winx Saga - My Thoughts and Critique - Part 1: Characters

Be warned: The following post will be quite long as I have a lot to say. Please note that this is all my personal opinion and this is just the thoughts and critique of someone that has watched the original Winx Club several time and I have watched the new Winx Saga, and this is in no way a blind hatred based on only word of mouth and seeing half a trailer. Enjoy

I will be comparing this new series to the original 4Kids version, as this is the version I hold close to my heart and grew up watching. So if there are any plot differences I describe from the animation, it is probably due to the slight changes made in the Nick Dub, which some people will know best (example, in 4Kids dub, Aisha’s name is Layla, and Sparks is known as Domino in the Nick dub)

CHARACTERS

Well, I have a lot to say about the characters, just like anyone else. I’ll break down, the casting, compare the character to the animation, and their personality in the Netflix series.

Bloom

The actress chosen in my opinion was a good choice. The problem I have, is her personality.  They got the determination and hot-head traits right, of course. But in the animation, Bloom is warm, friendly and bubbly. Easy-going and popular among her peers. I don’t know if they were trying to appeal to the oh-so-angsty teenagers that don’t want to go outside and have few friends. The typical “I’m not like other girls” trope. Tropes are popular, and as someone who has written stories in the past, I have used that trope once, but usually it’s a trope I like when it’s to show the character’s beauty compared to others who may be catty and selfish; not so beautiful on the inside. Here, to me, Bloom is just unlikable. She may be angsty and a rebellious teen, blah blah blah, but she was so rude to people like her Earth mother, and inconsiderate of her own actions and how it could affect those around her. Even if Aisha told her “That is a bad idea, you’re going to regret it” she runs along and does it anyway, and then she gets into a bad situation which also affects everyone, Even if she helps clean up the mess, damage is still done.

In Fate, Bloom’s relationship with her parents is not amazing. Yes, she’s an angsty, rebellious teen who almost kills them because she lost control of her power, but I found this cold, rude relationship so unnecessary.  As a teen, sometimes it may seem like no one is listening nor can understand,  parents just seem nosy and overbearing, but communication is key. That’s what I find so many shows are missing now: communication.

Looking at Bloom’s relationship with her parents in the animation, it’s not only simpler for them to know from the start that she has powers, but it makes the communication between both parties better. This strong relationship Bloom and her parents have is always present, but we see the beauty of it in Season 1, episode 13, “Meant to Be” when Mike and Vanessa sit her down and talk to her about how they realised she had magic before that fateful meeting with Stella.

There is none of that warmth and love now. Bloom curses at her mother, gives her attitude and is overall just a brat.  Bloom may feel remorse towards herself for burning her mother, but then, why is the attitude towards her so ugly? I really don’t like it.

Aisha/Layla

Next is Aisha, who is the only character that was not whitewashed from the original. The only reason I think she wasn’t is because the creators of Winx Saga knew there would be a true uproar if they dared to replace her with someone non-black.

She is the general voice of reason in the group, and the babysitter of Bloom and company. She will support and be the shoulder for Bloom to lean on in a few cases, but generally she’s the only one calling Bloom out for being rash and insensible, but then she gets ignored or sneered at for it, despite rbeing the only one with awareness for consequences.

There isn’t much to compare to with her animated version except for her being athletic; made very obvious in episode one where she says “I swim twice a day, every day”. (Even though that is the only episode we see her following said routine.) Other than that, her backstory is not expanded upon like the animation, obviously due to the lack of screen time and actual length of the Netflix series, therefore for me, I didn’t really bond with her character like in the original.

Stella

The actress is pretty. Not too hard to cast a pretty blonde in a series. Moving on.

In the original Winx, I adore Stella. She’s bubbly, she’s fun, she’s bright. Literally the sunshine of the group. Yes, she has her snooty privileged princess moments, but she is a likable snooty, privileged princess. Why? She showed that she really does care for her friends. Stella can be self-centered and insecure, but she’s never afraid to say that she’s wrong when she realises her mistakes. This is shown several times, but right now I can speak of two instances: Season 1, Episode 8 “Spelled”. Technically, she was under a spell that made her moody and rude, but she still knew she had to set things right after upsetting Musa. Another memorable moment for me when she showed her caring side was during the girls’ stay at the no-magic resort in Season 2, episode 21 ““Trouble in Paradise”. She went after Aisha/ Layla to check if she was all right, they connected and Stella earned her Charmix. Overall, Stella in the animation has her flaws, but she is loved by all and she herself loves the people she’s close to.

However, Stella in Winx Saga, I detest. I was really disappointed with what they did to her character. Honestly, it would have made more sense if she was Diaspro (Sky’s ex-fiance from season 1 and 3) and not Stella. She’s  a snob, rude and dismissive of others’ feelings. They did try to toss a sympathy card at our faces later when they eplained the reason why Winx Saga Stella is so - her toxic, overbearing and abusive mother - but honestly, maybe it was because it happened so fast because of the limited time, butI was not feeling any sympathy towards her. I felt like I should have, but I couldn’t. I hope her character changes in Season 2, if I even bother watching it, because I was enormously disappointed with Stella’s new persona for this first season.  The Solaria ring was nice enough though.

Musa

Well, here we go. One of the infamous whitewashing cases.  To tell the truth, I'm not surprised but disappointed that it acueallyhappened. You mean to tell me they couldn't find any capable Asian actresses for Musa? Yes, small production and low budget, but still. If you are going to make a live action for a cast that is well loved, respected and recognised for the diversity, you should keep it. It just feels like they do it on purpose at this point.

 Winx Club Musa I like a lot. I love all the girls, but she's just so laid-back and cool, but she's not afraid to call someone out for being unfair or on their attitude (namely Stella most times). She cares for her friends and she cares for Riven. She's family oriented and she's so passionate about music.

 In Winx Saga, she's a mind fairy who used to be a dancer and listens to music with headphones to block out the emotions of people around her when she gets overwhelmed. Interesting new concept and it comes in handy for the new show material. I wouldn't say she was completely unlikable in the WS series but there wasn't anything much besides her ability and that she and Sam (Terra's brother) had somehting more than a fling going on. They were a nice couple. Good chemistry in kisses. I don't know why they decided to not make Riven her man - who knows what the plan is. Riven was not hers in the beginning of the animation either, but we saw a great bond form later on. Their relationship had problems unlike the other Winx couples, but they still are a fan favourite. Let's see how this new match goes I guess?

Flora/Terra

Terra We all know she's supposed to be Flora, no matter how they try to spin it. Before anyone says she's a different character so it's not whitewashing, I have seen a video on Youtube where a girl explains that in actuality, it was supposed to be Flora because there are (now deleted) clips of characters talking to Flora, not Terra. And the adresses portfolio said she was to play Flora. They seemed to change it to avoid heating up the hot water they had already landed themselves into.

Therefore, I will be comparing Terra and Flora. I was extremely disappointed when I saw the trailer and realised Flora was clearly not there. I am not usually one to care whether or not someone looks like me in a show, but I do relate to Flora. I may not always be one that likes to get close to nature honestly, but everything else about her I relate to. I love pink a lot, I am a mixed race person so her looks are what I identify with the most, and our personalities are quite similar. 

Terra, on the other hand, is obviously white. The love of plants is there and her sweet and gentle personality is there. Though, it doesn’t get much time to shine because whenever she speaks, she’s either cut off or ignored, unless she’s spouting information the others want to hear at the moment.  They did make her quite chatty, and at times even I was a bit annoyed, not because she was chatty, but because that trait just seemed to be a gateway for the scriptwriters to hit you with details about Alfea and its history, and information about fairies without making much effort. Terra didn’t have much screen time, but whenever she was on screen, she was always the butt of a joke and treated poorly. When the situation became dire, she did have some moments of strength, but then the other characters still treated her the same so it seems meaningless.

One main reason Terra stands out to the audience is the fact that she’s the only plus-sized character. I’m all for representation, but I don’t like where they went with Terra. She’s shown to be insecure about her body (shown when she avoids her roommates to change alone). Yes, she’s supposed to be a teen who has heard non-directed comments about weight by other characters, but why couldn’t they make her a confident plus-sized girl? I have plenty of friends that are plus-sized and confident about themselves, older or younger. In media, it’s rare enough to see a plus-sized person, but also one that has confidence. This show is directed to teens, and those who may look and feel the same as Terra won’t have a good example set for themselves to be more confident. If you’re going to include a certain figure in your story, yes, everyone has insecurities and all, but if you have the power to shine light and empower, do it right!

Sky

One reason why I bothered watching the show. Danny Griffin. The man playing Sky. Iin the original Winx, I did not really care for Sky as I’m not really into the long blonde hair, I prefer shorter hair. So I was quite pleased to see this casting as it fits more into my personal type.

Anyways, let’s continue.

I found that the casting was done well for Sky. A hot blonde warrior that can wield weapons well? They nailed it. However, that’s kind of where it ended for me. Due to the plot, his character was pretty much ruined for me. Winx Saga Sky was sadly unremarkable personality-wise. The story didn’t allow for much expansion for him besides having the hots for Bloom and the whole boo-hoo story about his father. There was something of a nice relationship with his mentor, but I’ll get to that later.

Danny Griffin’s performance was quite good. My only issue was one part of his first appearance where his first few lines. . .sounded like lines. Not so much the result of bad acting, but it just was another case of sounding like lines written for a script than natural conversation. But I only really saw that in the first episode, and since everyone would have been getting into character at that time I can let it pass. Otherwise, he performed well as an actor.

Riven

Winx Club Riven does not have the best first impression. According to Musa, he’s “a little rough around the edges, but that’s kind of his charm”. He’s a troubled, moody guy who falls for the wrong girl. He has a very competitive side, especially with Sky, who always manages to beat him in combat. He is indeed often arrogant of his abilities, but he proved himself to not be just all talk during his escape from imprisonment in Cloud Tower during Season 1, and even Sky admitted to being impressed with his knowledge of survival and strategies, even going so far as to say he always thought Riven was the “Red Fountain Slacker”. Animated Riven also has a sweet side that was displayed in season 2 when he comforted Musa during the girls’ first mission to Shadowhaunt, and much more so after they started dating. He expressed how much he cared for Musa in shy but blunt ways. Flawed, but a character that developed throughout the series.

Winx Saga completely threw that out of the window. Riven is now just a clown that does bad boy things. He’s clearly still being portrayed as the “edgy” character with troubles and insecurities, but the rest of the show is so aggressively dark and edgy that he really has no way to stand out anymore. I don’t know what they’re planning to do with his characterr later on, but I really dislike what they did to him. The only thing done right is his competitive nature towards Sky. Side note, this is also my personal preference, but I must add that I am not feeling the minimal facial hair. I’d prefer a clean shaven face. The little spikes just looks messy. But then, facial hair always looks messy to me. 

Faragonda

Faragonda. Or as she is known now, Farah Dowling. I’m not sure what to say for her. The actress did well, I can say that. The problem always lies with the characters themselves.

 Faragonda is a beloved headmistress that always has an eye out for her students, whether she watches them through her magic mirror in her office or just personally. She gives them enough guidance so they can grow on their own and helps them when she sees the need to. However, she is also strict when needed and will not condone disobedience; this was seen in season 1 when the Winx were punished for breaking into Cloud Tower to get Stella’s ring from the Trix. She is a brave, just and kind woman, well suited for a principal position.

Farah Dowling does not have much besides her position. She’s very secretive and those secrets seem to be there to cause drama when it could have ben avoided. It could be an irrational thought process that humans have, but I’d expect that from someone who hasn’t experienced much in life. The type of past Farah has, she should know better than to keep secrets if she knows it can put the whole school in danger. Her lack of disciplinary action was evident, whether it was the scene of a villain making their move or Bloom blatantly disobeying orders and making choices that moved the plot forward a bit. It was odd to see that even if she knew this person went dilly-dallying in her office or broke a rule, ut wasn’t met with discipline unless something really bad happened. Whereas, we all know that in a school setting, small rule breaking is also punished. I did like the part in the last episode when she and Bloom finally had a warm interaction, I found it very sweet and it was nice to finally have her interact with Bloom without having to expect some impending doom to arise in the next scene.

Beatrix

We did not get the stylish trio we know and love for Winx Saga, but I must say, I was not disappointed by Sadie Soverall. She portrayed the character really well.

She’s a blending of the famous Trix. She’s cunning and does not let anyone get in her way, much like Icy. Seductive like Darcy and I’d say she has Stormy’s malicious nature. (I mean the Trix are all malicious but Stormy generally could let her viciousness rule her judgement). As well as the fact that her power kind of looks like electric bolts, like Stormy’s.

A manipulator that was being manipulated. She’s icy cold, cunning and she knows who she should attach herself to in order to reach her goals. Just a sub-villain I say, but I enjoyed the character. Minus the odd little plots her character was mixed into, which I will discuss later.

Rosalind

A new character who so far seems like the puppet master of all the characters - both good and evil sides. A master manipulator and charismatic. Very enjoyable to watch despite her short screen time. She was the one person that actually had me excited to know what was going to happen next. Very well performed in my opinion.

Mike

The only time I saw this actor truly in character was in the last episode when he was wearing this blue shirt. He really looked like Mike. It may always be necessary to dress a character exactly like the original, but some things are just subtle and yet iconic. Imagine Shaggy from Scooby-Doo without his green shirt and brown pants combo. It wouldn’t feel like him. Otherwise he’s quite a basic looking man so not too hard to cast. I do think this actor really matched Mike though - looks wise, at least.

With Mike, there are less interactions with Bloom besides having very basic “How are you doing?”conversations. There’s a lame joke here and there but nothing really worth commenting over.here now The focus when it came to mentioning the parents in Winx Saga was mostly to Vanessa.

Vanessa

Vanessa in the original series is warm, loving and a good mother.  She and Bloom have a strong relationship and have great communication between them, and Bloom not only respects her but also goes to Vanessa when she needs advice and support. The ideal mother-daughter bond.

Date’s Vanessa is more. . .trying to be a good mother but not quite nailing it. As I mentioned during Bloom’s analysis, she’s met with hostility or downright rudeness if she even mentions going out and making friends to her daughter. There were a few moments when it could have been touching to see thieir interactions, but apart from the scene when Bloom was feeling homesick, it felt a bit rushed. Perhaps it was the acting, perhaps it was that the awkward interactions overruled the positive ones, but the Winx Saga relationship between Bloom and Vanessa didn’t feel as connected.

In conclusion, mot of the acting was well done. The issues I have were mostly due to the writing of the characters, not the ability of the actors.

Other minor characters will be analysed during the plot discussion.

[theofficialdramallama]

Dear Festividder... (Festivids 2023)

Letter under the cut!

First off - thank you so much for putting your time and effort into making a vid for me~! <3

I love pretty much all aspects of all the fandoms I’ve requested, so I’m sure I’ll be so happy and grateful for whatever vid you create, but here’s some stuff to help if you want a little bit more to go on! My suggestions are just that: suggestions - I love to be surprised! <3

Music:

I would love it that the song is the right one for the vid - I have pretty broad musical tastes and there’s not a lot I don’t like, although I’m less keen on the more electronic/dubstep-y side of dance music. I really like folk music, pop-punk, 90s/00s boybands/girlbands, pop-rock, rock, pop (80s, 90s, 00s and some modern pop), 80s power ballads, singer-songwriters with their own instruments, some country, musical theatre soundtracks, K-Pop and J-Pop… I’m pretty old-school with my music tastes, but honestly I’ll listen to almost anything and if it works for the vid - that’ll make me love the song anyway! A lot of my favourite songs have come from vids <3

General:

I love my ships xD <3 However, general fandom vids are great too <3 Character studies, friendship vids, found-family trope vids, cute vids, sad vids, silly vids, bad-ass vids… They all warm different parts of my heart <3 <3

On to the individual fandoms:

~ Dramaworld (TV)

If you know and have watched this show, I salute you! <3 Any vids related to Claire x Joon will be loved <3 <3 S1 vids are welcomed~ I know a lot of people might have simply seen s1 and not s2, and if this is you - go watch s2! It takes everything from s2 and turns it up to 11 with a bigger budget, more ambitious storylines and twists! <3 If we’re including s2 eps, [SPOILERS] angst-filled Claire x Joon break up vids, humour vids, dark vids based around the destruction of Dramaworld itself/Evan’s deception, Joon/Claire character studies... Anything goes!

~ Fools Rush In (1997) [SAFETY]

An underrated classic~! <3 I love the development in Alex and Isabel's relationship - from the one-night stand, to the surprise pregnancy, to the Vegas wedding, to falling in love, and all of the rest of it! <3 Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek both smash their roles! As for the video, I'd love to see an Alex x Isabel vid, maybe focused on the themes of the film, or the concept of signs in the universe, or just their relationship in general~!

~ If Only (2004) [SAFETY]

Time loops are one of my favourite story tropes, and I love the unique take of having just one loop in the film -  Paul Nicholls and Jennifer Love Hewitt were brilliant in their roles! For the vid, I'd love a Ian x Samantha vid - something focusing on the bittersweetness/angst of Samantha's death and Ian having to learn to let her go by sacrificing himself in her place </3

~ The In Between (2022) [SAFETY]

I love this film with a passion~ I’m a sucker for cheesy/overly-dramatic/romantic ghost stories, and this ticks all the boxes. Angsty Tessa x Skylar vids would suit me perfectly, but if you have any other ideas for vids, feel free to make it~! <3

~ Just Like Heaven (2005) [SAFETY]

A 00s classic~! <3 Elizabeth x David vids would be great - angstier or light-hearted takes on their relationship throughout the film~ <3

~ Leap Year (2010 USA/Ireland) [SAFETY]

Cheddar cheese, but I love this film so much (my Irishness strikes again xD) <3 Declan x Anna vids would be perfect - from the fluffy humour to the realisation that they both love each other, to Declan’s backstory... Anything would work! <3

~ The Upper Hand (TV)

Highly unlikely, but if you do know this 90s UK adaptation of Who's The Boss, congrats! As such, I feel I'm slightly repeating myself - I love the will-they, won't-they aspect of Charlie and Caroline, so I'd love the vid to be a showcase of their relationship development, and all the ups and downs that came with it <3

~ Who's the Boss? (1984 TV)

I love the will-they, won't-they aspect of Tony and Angela, so I'd love the vid to be a showcase of their relationship development, and all the ups and downs that came with it <3

~ 开端 | Reset (TV 2022)

Fun fact, I discovered this drama through the Festivids Google Sheet for this year~! Time loops are one of my favourite story tropes, so I was immediately hooked by the premise, and loved the show~! For the vid, I'd love a Li Shiqing x Xiao Heyun vid, or something focusing on the timey-wimey time loop aspect of it all~!

~ 神様、もう少しだけ | Kamisama Mou Sukoshi Dake | God Please Give Me More Time

Super niche, but I recently watched this show and loved it for how real it felt </3 Give me all the angst and heartbreak between Masaki x Keigo </3