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#hate to see him go love to watch him leave
chiscaralight · 3 days
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being roommates with kinich!! but you swear he hates you. he’s such pretty thing! but he almost never talks to you. he’ll do all the dishes, take out and fold your laundry and leave it on top of the washer dryer for you, he’ll clean when you’re not home and even leave food out for you when you get back late! but he just. won’t. speak to you!!!
and it’s driving you insane. you just want to get to know him! he’s gorgeous and he seems really sweet. he’s also built just the way you like. slender and toned, with the strongest gaze you’ve ever felt. is it so much to want to talk (and maybe fuck) your absolutely perfect roommate?
it’s driving you insane! so insane, that you start to miss when certain articles of clothes don’t come back from the laundry you pick up on top of the machine. maybe you didn’t actually put those panties in the bin this time, but who cares? kinich is shirtless while he does dishes this time, it’s the exact moment you need to pretend to watch something on tv!
and your sideward glances are not as slick as you think they are, because he knows exactly what you’re doing. it’s a ring from the doorbell that has you rolling your eyes, going to see who’s disturbing your peace while he licks the fork you used to eat the food he cooked a few hours ago. by the time you return, he’s already done, wiping down the counter and making his way back to his room wordlessly. you sigh in exasperation, you didn’t even get time to think about what fake story you could cook up to get him to talk to you! but as you groan at your misfortune in the living room, his fingers are wrapped hard around his cock, nose pressed into the underwear he’s stolen from you this time. It doesn’t take long before he’s making a mess around his hand, traces of your scent flooding his senses. but this pair is starting to lose its smell and he’s getting more and more fed up. how much longer can he keep this up before he breaks?
for you, it’s not much longer, because your fingers are deep in your cunt, thrusting in and out while you try to silence your sounds. you can’t even help the way his name slips from your mouth, you can’t even control it! it’s not your fault he’s been all over your mind for the past few weeks, at work, in classes, in the shower, it’s just too much for you!
and maybe you were just a bit louder than you expected, because your door is cracking open a few moments later, the afformentionef problem staring down at you ask you freeze up. he’s still deathly quiet as always, but he's practically jumping for joy in his mind. this is like a dream come true? you’ve basically been served to him on a silver platter, and he’ll make sure to not waste a single bite.
maybe a bit too literally, because your neck and chest are covered with love bites from his lips. one hand is holding one of yours above your head, the other very slowly brushing against your clit, big difference in the way he’s absolutely drilling into you. and you swear your seeing stars, moans morphing into cries as he angles up just the slightest bit, cock prodding against the walls of your cunt. it’s almost like magic, the way you feel. and he’s much less quiet now, because once his lips are on yours, he’s groaning into your mouth, teeth clashing with yours as he drags his lips downwards to sink his teeth into your skin again.
his build isn’t just for show either, because he’s flipping you over with such ease, holding your hips just where he needs them to be as he bullies his cock right back in.
kinich who now realizes how much power he holds over you, because whenever he even just as much passes by you, he can see your body tense up just the slightest bit. and he used it to his advantage! riling you up throughout the days with weird looks and soft touches, before ultimately deciding to bend you over the counter because he misses that cunt so much already </3
he’ll leave the door unlocked when he gets back, settling on the couch with speed so he can drag you onto his lap and have you ride him because it’s all he could think about in his classes.
and kinich that will beg you to let him cum in that sweet pussy just once, but between the two of you oh both know he’s lying. he’ll keep fucking his cum into you over and over, until he’s cumming inside you once again. he just can’t help it! you’re sucking him in so good like this, what did you expect him to do.
just like the way he took care of the little things, when you’re spent, on the verge of passing out on his cock, he’ll scoop you up and take you to his room, cleaning you up and wrapping you in his blankets so he can stay with you the entire night.
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entitled-fangirl · 2 days
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War prize.
Cregan Stark x Targaryen!reader
Summary: The North hates Cregan's wife and shows it rather harshly. Cregan is there to tell them off.
Warnings: violence, sexism, talks of losing virginity unwillingly, the poor reader just going through it😭
A/n: My writing is kinda eh on this one but I got it done which is all that matters. Huge italicized sections mean like a little flashback in case you needed to know that. Based on an ask!
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She watched her guard lock the door behind him.
How long had she been stuck in this castle?
She felt used. Taken as a trophy and nothing more. Purely a way to show status.
Purely a way to show who won the war.
Cregan Stark had won the war. And now she was his.
He was kind and caring, quick to compassion and slow to anger. If not for the others, she could've seen this as a happy marriage.
But the others made that impossible.
For the door was not locked to keep her in, but to keep others out.
Cregan saw the very actions his people tried against her, and he was concerned. 
It didn't help that all of her dresses were green. A reminder of what had come to pass.
Anytime Cregan's back was turned, something happened to her. Whether it was harsh words, spitting at her feet, or even once a manhandling that almost turned into a mob.
Cregan knew she deserved better. She was kind. He hardly believed her to be a Hightower. At first glance that day in the Keep, he thought perhaps she was Aemond's wife, or another one of Aegon's whores he had always kept around.
But no. Aemond's twin sister.
He felt an overwhelming sense of protectiveness when two men threw the woman to the ground in front of him.
Her dress was torn in places. Her hair was tangled and dirt ran from her temple to her chin, clearly having been thrown around a lot. She wiped the falling tears from her face with bruised hands. 
"What is this?" He asked the men. Others began to crowd around them to see what would become of her.
The men had only seen prostitutes along the path from the North to the Keep, and even those were few. Seeing a highborn lady was a rare sight.
"Found her hiding away," the man on her right commented.
Cregan sighed and reached down, pulling her chin up so he could look at her. He tipped her face from side to side, observing her. "And what did you hope I'd say when you threw a princess down at my feet? Did you expect me to reward you?"
The man paled. "Well, this is a traitor, my lord. Surely-"
"-Her only crime was the womb she was born from."
"She wear their colors still, Lord Stark-"
"Is she? I can hardly tell under the mud you've drug her through." He huffed, "I want you two out of my sight."
They looked at one another and nodded, moving to pick up the girl again. She jerked back in fear. 
"Leave her," he grumbled. "Well? Be gone. All of you!"
Slowly, they filed out of the room. "Are you gravely injured?" He asked softly.
"Not particularly, my lord," she whimpered.
He sighed and bent at the knee, joining her on the ground. "Did any of them truly put their hands on you? More than to drag you here?"
She wiped her face again, "Are you hoping to take my innocence, my lord?"
A noise involuntarily left his throat. "What?"
"I… It is yours. Just please don't harm me," she sniffled.
Any motion he made to comfort her, he pulled away as if burned. "I'm not going to do that."
"No, no please don't leave me to them," she begged when he pulled away. "Please don't let them have me. I'll do anything."
"They won't have you," he tried again. "Nothing more is going to happen to you. Now, go get redressed and come back. You're not leaving my side until I get this situated."
After a few hours, Cregan unlocked the door and entered their shared chambers. "My love?"
He cursed under his breath when he noticed she had fallen asleep on the bed. He wouldn't have been so loud had he known.
He sat on the bed and brushed her hair from her face. "Wake up, dear wife."
She hummed in discontent.
His lips pulled into a thin line. Things had gone especially wrong lately and it had begun to show in her actions. 
"C'mon." He began to pull her up. 
She whined and began to lean into him, tucking her face into his neck.
He chuckled, "I have something for you."
Her eyes opened, "Oh, do you?" 
There was outrage when Cregan took her as a wife. The North fought against the idea of having a Southern traitor as their Lady.
He had promised King Aegon III to be fair and just, and the boy said okay, knowing that he would stay honest to his word. 
But the North hated her all the same.
Cregan never considered to fear for her safety, for she was the Warden's wife, and he thought the people would know better than to touch her. 
That, and she hadn't told him of the things said right to her face when he wasn't around. She figured he knew. 
They walked through the city, her arm in his as he showed her around. She took in every sight she could, entranced by the culture of the North. 
But that also welcomed the stares.
Cregan had noticed them immediately, and he flipped her hood up. He didn't care about them, but he knew she would. So by doing so, he was hoping it would bring her a little more comfort. 
Anyone in Westeros would recognize that silver hair.
He leaned down just a bit. "Just tell me when you grow tired or cold."
She nodded, "May I go explore?"
He smiled, "So eager to get away from me?"
"No," she corrects.
"I'm only jesting. Go on."
She grinned and began to look around, trying to decide where to go first.
"Don't wander off too far," he remarked as he moved towards a lord to chat.
She nodded and went, walking a little further down the road. She looked back occasionally to make sure she was still in his line of sight. In doing so, she bumped into a woman harshly.
Y/n pulled back and apologized. "Forgive me!"
The woman set her basket down and straightened her skirt. "Foolish girl. Watch where you step next time."
"I do apologize." She dug in her pocket, pulling out a few coins. "Here. For your trouble."
The woman's eyes widened. She pulled the coins from her hand accusingly. "Where did you get these?" She hissed.
"Well… I… just from…" she turned back to where she could see Cregan. 
The woman grabbed her arm. "Did you steal these? Tell me where."
She jerked against the woman's movements. "No. No, I didn't."
"My lady, is this girl bothering you?" A tall man interfered, helping the woman.
The woman tilted her head, "She's throwing around coins like she's something of value. Look at 'er."
The man eyed her and reached up, pulling the princess' hood down. Their eyes widened. 
She turned to try to catch Cregan's attention, but the man pulled her to him. "A Targaryen, eh? The usurper's bitch sister, aren't you?"
"Please let me go," she whimpered.
"A green traitor in Winterfell? Seems the rumors were right."
She tried to pull her arm away, "Unhand me."
"Shut it, traitor scum."
"CREGAN!" She yelled out of instinct.
Cregan's head snapped immediately, his heart dropping to his stomach. His eyes scanned the crowd, trying to find her amidst the people that had begun to gather. But he couldn't see her. His worry grew and he began to step out into the crowd in hope of finding her.
She fought against the man's grip. She remembered this feeling of helplessness from only weeks before. "Stop! Please… Please, I'll do anything! Just stop!" 
Anyone around them was stopped now, onlooking or shouting at what was going on.
Cregan's jaw set as he figured she was in the midst of it, and he rolled his shoulders back.
"CREGAN!" He heard again, and that was all he needed.
He began to shove people to the side in an attempt to move through the mob that had begun to form. His angered shouts were drowned out.
Luckily, the Northern Warden was burly and built like a wall, so he was able to work through the crowd by sheer force alone. 
Once towards the middle, he finally saw her. 
The man held her tightly by her silver hair. Her hands were trying to lighten his harsh grip on her as she cried. She couldn't stop the others’ hands from pulling at her skirt or the way they spit at her, but she could at least try to stop the pain erupting from her scalp.
"ENOUGH!" Cregan yelled. He finally made it to them, and his hand gripped the man's throat tightly and he leaned down to his ear. "Unhand her."
She sunk to the ground and clutched at her dress.
Cregan kept his hand firm but looked out at the others that still surrounded them. "Leave." he growled through his teeth. "All of you." When no one moved, he threw the man to the ground and turned to them in rage. "LEAVE!"
One by one they left quietly. He looked down at the man. "May the gods have mercy on you, for I have none."
"Keep your eyes closed," he chuckled when she almost stumbled. "I've got you."
"How far must we go?"
"Almost there, I assure you."
After a while, he finally sat her down and instructed her to hold on her arms.
A heavy weight was placed in them. Something soft. Something moving.
"Open."
"A dire wolf?" Her eyes widened.
"Mere pup now, but a mighty predator later. I felt I owed you one."
She frowned, "You don't owe me a thing. I… I feel as if I owe you."
He couldn't stop a bright laugh from escaping his throat. "Hardly."
"Cregan," she began, trying to ignore the way the pup cuddled into her for warmth. "You have saved me time and time again. Without you, I would be in some brothel, or maimed by a man without heart, or…" her voice faltered, "Paraded through King's Landing as a true war prize. But I am not. I'm your wife instead. That is a fate I did not deserve."
"But I failed you. I promised to protect you, but I find that I cannot do that as well as I had hoped. This war was hard on my people. While I cannot fault them for their anger, it is wrong to use it on their Lady of Winterfell." His voice grew persistent. "You are mine. You are no Hightower anymore. You and I both know that."
She nodded and began to pet the wolf. "I pray that the North does one day."
"They will," he confirmed. "I shall make them if I must."
"I just don't want to be stuck in this room anymore. These walls are driving me mad," she admitted.
He sighed. "I'm sure they are. But soon you shall have a protector for when I cannot be there." He leaned down at pet the small pup on her lap. "This too will pass eventually."
"Once I give you an heir?"
"Once we have a child," he corrected, "I'm sure they shall be lighter on you."
"And until then?"
He smiled sweetly, "I'll do all I can. Now." He brushed hair from her face. "Please say you like it," he said as he looked down at the pup.
Only then did she let herself truly consider that she now had a dire wolf. "It's beautiful. I just…"
He held a finger up, "Enough of that. I promise you that I and this pup will not let another hand touch you."
She flushed lightly and smiled. "Thank you. I do not say that enough."
He shrugged. "You do, it just usually looks like other things instead."
"What do you mean?"
"Well," he looked down at her dress, "wearing the dress that I had made for you is a thank you in and of itself. Blue suits you well. I could name things for all eternity. You are a perfect wife. And I admire you greatly."
"You've only known me seven moons."
"And that is seven moons enough to know."
"Cregan, I am a trophy of your accomplishments."
"You are hardly that."
She sighed, "But that is what they see me as."
"Do I?"
She considered his question. "I don't believe so."
"Then does it matter? I respect you, and with time, I will make sure they do as well."
She nodded and adjusted the dog in her arms. "Very well. I trust you."
He smiled and stood. "That's all I ask for. Now, name your pup and dress for supper. I'll come collect you myself. Is that alright?"
She nodded again.
"The North will like you," he left off with as he closed the door behind him.
She heard the lock behind him.
In time. 
In time.
Either they learn to like her, or they shall meet a Stark dire wolf closely.
The actual dire wolf or Cregan Stark, it didn't matter.
Their jaws would both equally snap at any threat.
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chaos-in-deepspace · 2 days
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LADS Zayne: Hard Day in the Office | NSFW
One of my buddies really wanted Zayne jacking it in his office. And so did I. So I did it. Here's a masturbation fic of our favorite doctor.
Unedited Drabble
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Pairings: Zayne x Reader Warnings : Masturbation, Public Office Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+.
Blog Information | Masterlist
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Zayne
He had thought he handled the situation well. Your appointment had been going well, for the most part. Other than a little playful banter, it had been professional. Just like every appointment with Dr. Zayne.
Then the end of the appointment had come, and you had gotten a bit more casual with the doctor. Placing a hand around his arm as you spoke with a smile on your face, asking him what time he got off today in case he wanted to get dinner after his shift. It was sweet, it was innocent.
So why had Zayne's head gone to the gutter the moment you laughed and told him you'd see him later.
You had left him alone in his office, alone to his thoughts, and not a single one could be considered even somewhat professional. Instead the only thing he could think about was how uncomfortably tight his pants were, and how hot his office suddenly had gotten.
Zayne had checked the time at his computer, looking it over and sighing in frustration. He had at least half an hour before he had to see his next patient. At least if he had work to do, he could distract himself easier. Instead he was at his office, alone, for half an hour.
Trying to do paperwork was basically a lost cause as he shifted in his chair and winced when he could still feel his erection. With a resigned huff, Zayne got up and locked the door to his office before going back to his chair. Behind his desk, even if someone had walked in, they wouldn't be able to see him.
He sometimes hated how complex his clothes were as he began working his belt off and unzipping his pants. He didn't bother fully taking anything off, instead grasping his hard cock and letting out a soft grunt in response.
He was already so damn worked up from you as he used some of the pre cum at the tip to help him glide along his length. His breathing was already a bit shallower as he worked his dick, thinking about all sort of scenarios.
What would you look like underneath his desk at this moment. He could perfectly envision you under the large desk, away from view. Your mouth teasing him through his clothes and you nuzzled up against his thighs, asking him what he wanted. His hands going through your hair as he guided you closer to his cock and your smaller hand going to unzip him and pull out his length.
Zayne squeezed his own cock as he imagined how your mouth would feel. You'd probably be leaving butterfly kisses along the length of it, kissing upwards to tease him until you took the head into your mouth. Zayne closed his eyes now, imagining all of this happening and covering his mouth with his free hand to help stifle the noises he was making.
The things he'd do to you…the things he'd let you do to him. Whatever you wanted he'd be accepting of it. On top, on bottom, switching it up, eating you out, letting you suck him off. If it meant he could be with you, he'd be willing to do it.
Another gasp left his mouth as he felt himself getting close, his pace picking up as he worked his cock. He just needed to cum, to get that release so he could focus on his job. He grunted again as he took in deep breaths.
Would you be willing to swallow it? Zayne had a fairly healthy diet if you didn't consider all the sweets. He'd be more willing to eat things that would make him taste better if it meant he could watch you. Have you sticking your tongue out, showing him his own cum painting your mouth, then swallowing his load.
That mental image was enough to throw him over the edge. He groaned as he felt the warm release coating his fist as he worked himself through it, no longer capable of hiding all of his noises. He was panting again, slumped in his chair as he looked over at the time. Only ten minutes had passed. He let out an almost pitiful huff as he sat back up, then heard his phone chime.
It was a message from you. A short one, giving him the location of the restaurant you wanted to try. He thought it over and blushed, realizing how hard his day was going to be when he thought about you.
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sugarlywhispers · 2 days
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b.katsuki x reader (fem) | pro hero!dynamight x famous singer!reader a.n; lol a lil something that came to my mind while listening to ariana grande - love me harder <3
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thinking about Hero Dynamight getting the mission to protect the new rising star singer that had received several harsh death threads.
he hates it. despises the fact that he will have to babysit a young singer. he thinks–oh no, he knows this is vengeance from his own company for all the times he caused havoc himself. so, he doesn't have a choice. he has to do it.
even though he knows he should have searched for your name and your case, he doesn't. call it arrogance or petty behavior, he doesn't care shit about it. so he goes blind into the airport to wait for your arrival. but as time goes by, more and more people start to gather around and before he actually realizes it, the airport is fucking packed with reporters and fans all around. there's too many fucking people. he even sees round face, deku and half and half bastard at a distance... AS FANS. losers.
but shit, so you're bigger than what he thought.
the doors open, and the amount of screams and yells deafen him. he immediately turns his hearing aids off, afraid he’ll go deafer than he already is thanks to his quirk. when he looks up, there you come walking with a big bunch of bulky bodyguards surrounding you in a circle, yet they are useless against the amount of people trying to reach out to you. it’s fucking chaos, and for him to admit that when he has seen chaos right to its eyes, it’s a lot.
he received instructions to stay away, to just interfere if things get heavy. but damn, it is already heavily chaotic enough, specially when something or someone makes you trip. and that’s it. he starts pushing extras away to get closer to you, and as people recognize him in his hero gear and suit, they start moving away on their own will, cuz he is fucking Hero Dynamight.
your bodyguards help him with pushing more people away as he finally reaches you. without saying anything, he picks you up bridal style and starts walking towards the exit door of the airport to the special black van waiting for you. it gets easier to walk, thanks to how scared most people are of him. Hero Dynamight is the most respected and feared Hero of them all, because if paparazzis don’t leave him alone, he’d blow their cameras off. simple as that.
that’s how you met Hero Dynamight for the first time. you were told a professional hero would accompany you for the rest of your tour due to some threads some people were sending you. on your opinion, it was nothing new, nothing your team of bodyguards couldn’t handle. however, if your manager thought that you needed a freaking Pro Hero in that team, it probably was more serious than you thought. so you said yes. now, of all the heroes around the world, you could not have guessed this massive man, all big and authoritative –and freaking handsome– was the Hero Dynamight most of your fans shipped you with.
and as Hero Dynamight walked out of the airport with you in his arms, you could already read the fanfictions.
“T-thank you, I’m-...” you speak to him as he sits you on the back seat of the van. you feel weird, tingly and excited all over. you didn’t expect at all for him to do that. in fact, you were expecting to meet him at the hotel, where your manager told you he would wait for your arrival in the country.
but he cuts you off, saying, “Next time, watch where you walk, idiot,” and with that he closes the door of the van. but not before you could hear him grunt under his breath, “fucking extras, annoying pieces of sh-...”
you can’t help yourself but to think: wow, what a jerk.
you learned very quickly how a pain in the ass he could be. and how insanely attractive you found his attitude.
don't get me wrong, you'd still fight him tooth and nail when he is being an idiot. but damn, he is so handsome.
as time goes by and Katsuki gets to see you perform live, he gets to admit it.
Bakugou is… surprised. he is surprised by the exceptional talent you have as you perform your songs, with complicated choreos and still having perfect rhythm to sing live. he is impressed. very much so.
he stands there, on the side of the stage, arms closed over his chest and paying attention to everything and everyone around you.
and then, the song he likes the most from you starts. he frowns, confused. it wasn’t in your list for this tour, he knows it by memory already. But as you begin singing, you turn to the side, right where he is standing, and as you sing you look right at him and smile.
oh. his eyes open wide. you are singing it, for him. to him.
he feels heat in his cheeks. and a warmth in his chest that makes his whole body tingle. fuck, he's down bad.
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ariannag6-blog · 3 days
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Nanami in bed 18+ MNDI
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3k words. Female reader.
Spoiler he’s a simp for poc women
All nanami stories by me will be under the hashtag NanamiAria
Soft dom Nanami
Nanami would be a soft dom. Loves giving you lots of prep for him. Lots of sushing. Sushing if you squirm too much. Sushing if you become overstimulated. He wants to be the one who does all the work. He doesn’t want you to move just stay still and take his gentle love making. He won’t let you lift a finger. If it becomes a bit too much he’ll gently push your limits staying in slightly longer each time to build your stamina. I see him as someone who can last a long time and like long sessions so he will try to slowly and gently build you up to his level.
Occasionally rough fucks you and degrades you slightly when you tease him too much or when he’s had an extra rough day at work. He prefers to be gentle but when you push his buttons too many times you’ll find yourself bent over his desk, dicked down with no preparation. Immediately after a rough session he’ll go back to being sweet. Leaving soft kisses over your whole body. Pulling you in for a hug or cuddles. Saying things like “are you alright love?, You’re perfect., I love you darling.”.
He likes being the provider the one to do all the work so he would prefer being with someone submissive in the bedroom. If you were a top he would let you grind on him a bit but after a few mines Kento would grab your hips, ending up taking charge, being the one bouncing you up and down on him. He’s never aggressive about needing to be the one in charge it’s just in his nature I don’t think he would even realize he’s like this often times.
Nanami experience level
Not that experienced probably has only been with three people tops. Probably hates casual sex or one night stands. Despite his low experience Kento fucks like he’s a porn star quite literally. He can last forever if he wants to, even cum on command. Always knows the right words to say to get you off too it’s like it was scripted but it wasn’t. Love making just comes naturally to him.
You’d think based on his professional quiet composure that he doesn’t think about sex often but that would be a lie. I think he’s quite hyper sexual. Though he would try to match whatever sex drive you had out of respect. To get off when he’s not in a relationship or when you’re not around I don’t see him being the type of guy to watch porn. I see him reading smutty novels. He honestly reads them quite often. As sort of a guilty pleasure. Thats probably where he learned his skills and pillow talk from.
Nanami’s taste in women
Everybody headcannons him as liking women of color. I 100% agree! He loves tan skin, olive skin, dark skin, dark hair, long hair, wavy hair, curly hair, braids, straight hair. Hispanic women, black women, Asian women, mixed women, he loves it all. He would be captivated by some woman that doesn’t look like the usual girl he sees walking around town. He’s never really liked a white girl before especially if they’re blonde because it reminds him too much of himself. He doesn’t realize this consciously he’s always just liked who he’s liked in his eyes. I see him getting turned on everytime you get a tan. Everytime he sees the contrast of your tan skin next to his pale tone. It makes him want to eat you quite literally. He’ll use any excuse he can to drag you down to the beach with him to see your skin glow and grow darker under the sun. Also as an excuse to see you in the new bikini he secretly bought for you. If his woman wore a bonnet he would find it adorable whenever you had one on. He would often buy you new ones that are the highest quality silk in your favorite colors to spoil you. He’s obsessed with dark hair. Doesn’t matter if it’s straight, curly, wavy, braided, coily. He loves it all. You’ll often times find Nanami sneaking up behind you to smell your hair or finding any excuse he can to run his fingers through your locks/touch your hair. He’s quite literally obsessed with all of you. If you were from a different culture he would get turned on everytime you cooked him meals that you grew up with or spoke your native language. He would learn how to speak your Native language secretly to surprise you. Especially as a cute way to propose and a sneaky way to spice up things the bedroom. He would do little things to learn more about your culture overtime to feel closer to you and get to know you better. I see him liking curves on your bottom half. Such as thick thighs, juicy bottom. Definitely more of an ass man. I don’t see him caring if someone has a big chest or not it’s just something that’s either there or isn’t. He’ll cherish whatever body shape you bless him with.
Body hair preferences.
He literally does not give a single fuck what you do with your body hair. He’s obsessed with you no matter what. Nothing will stop him from eating you out. Pubes. He loves you bald, trimmed, different patterns, landing strip, bush. He will love and cherish whatever you have whenever you have it simply because it’s you. Other body hair. He doesn’t care if you shave or not. I think he’d be used to someone who did shave their body hair but wouldn’t tell you what to do. Hes a grown man he doesn’t find body hair to make someone any more or less attractive. I do think he would probably be with someone who preferred to remove all their body hair and preferred him to have some specifically just because I see him being with someone more feminine and traditional. Traditional fem women seem like the type prefer those things at least to me.
For himself I see him having light chest hair and leaving it untouched. Lightly trimming his underarm hair. For his pubes I see him leaving them trimmed, preferring just a little something on his skin. If you asked otherwise for him to be bald or bush he would do whatever you asked to please you.
Nanami dad
Everyone headcannons him as wanting children but personally I would think he’d be scared of that. He would find children to be cute yes but at the end of the day he wouldn’t want his children growing up in a world they ultimately just have to work a stressful 9-5 and probably overtime in. He doesn’t like work he just does it because he has to. He knows he would have to work more if he had a kid and wouldn’t be able to spend the time he wanted with his family. He wouldn’t want to curse a kid with that life.
Regardless of kids he would ask you to quit your job and let him be the provider. He doesn’t want you to feel the same stress he does over work. I think pregnancy would worry him too much. He’d hate how hard it was on a woman’s body. He’d constantly think something bad would happen to you because he’d spend too much time on the internet trying to learn every possibility of something that could happen to stay ahead of it. I do think he has a kink for cuming inside you so he would most likely get a vasectomy so no accidents happen. If you really wanted children he would fuck you silly and remind you with his words how you wouldn’t be able to take him like this often if you were pregnant or busy with kids. When he’s finished with that he’ll buy you a cat instead to keep you occupied and hopefully for you not to ask again or he’ll buy another cat. I see him being a big cat person. Seeing you take care of the cats just doing simple things like that turns him on a lot.
Jealous Nanami
He tries not to be too possessive or jealous. He’s a grown man and understands a woman can live her own life, have her own friends, and what not. Though he tries his hardest to be good but he’s such a jealous man. He tries his best not to show his jealousy thinking it’ll turn you off. Not knowing that you’d actually love that side of him. Everytime you come back from an outing that he didn’t attend he missed your attention so much he’ll fuck you till your dick drunk off of him hoping you’ll feel so good and spoiled from him that you won’t leave again without him anytime soon. Any time you’re out together and a man looks at you he grips you tighter. It makes him want to take you to the nearest restroom, pin you up against the wall, fuck you passionately with love, while he begs you to tell him he’s the only man for you. He’s not insecure he knows you won’t leave or cheat. He also likes when men look at you he likes seeing their eyes shine at you then gaze up to him and realize they can’t have you. He still get’s so jealous from it though he can’t really understand why.
Nanami turn ons.
Doing domestic things turns him on a lot. Such as bringing him lunch, making him coffee,
cleaning, doing laundry. He likes it more than you wearing lingerie especially if you’re doing your chores wearing his shirt. Not that he thinks a woman has to do the domestic labor but he is old fashioned and traditional so he prefers traditional roles. He sees you doing these things as a sign of love and care. He also does the household duties when he has time off of work if there’s anything that needs to be done. Knowing you get to relax while he takes care of a household duty turns him on. You’ll often find him dragging you into the shower with him to fuck you silly when he’s finished mowing the lawn, or mopping the floors. He especially loves it when he comes home to find you doing something you love like cooking. When you’re cooking one of his favorite meals he’ll often eat you as the main course first as a way to say thank you for spoiling him.
He would never admit it but loves when you’re bratty on occasion because it gives him an excuse to bend you over his knee. He loves when you talk back without a care like you don’t know he’ll quickly put you in place. Nanami loves when your bratty self teases him while he’s at work. Weather it being you sending him pictures, videos, or you showing up and getting down on your knees under his desk toying with his waistband.
Husband Nanami
He loves being a husband. He would get married quickly. When he finds the right woman he doesn’t see the need to wait. He’s a hopeless romantic. Just being married turns him on. Knowing you have his last name, knowing he gets to take care of you from now on, it drives his mind wild. Anytime you casually call him husband or remind him that you’re his wife his member perks up instantly.
Nanami dirty talk
“Shh shh look at me love I have to break you in or you’ll never be able to take me. Just let it sit here I won’t thrust alright.
“Shh I told you to let me love”
“You’re so beautiful when I’m inside of you love. I always love how you let me take my time with you.”
“I’m so glad i met you. I feel so spoiled having such a sexy wife. Maybe i should spoil you with my tongue?”
“Shh hold still my love. Relax.”
“I love you darling. That’s right. I love it when it’s all the way inside your pretty walls”
“Yes that’s it love, let it out. Dont you dare hold back those moans from your husband.”
Kinks
I see him as old fashioned. Not super kinky. If being a care giver (not age play just like being the protector and provider) and a top in bed is a kink you can count that. Also finishing inside of you. Not sure if thats a kink but he has to finish inside of your pussy. He loves the feeling it gives both of you. On the rare occasions you last long enough for him to finish twice he’s in heaven. He’s obsessed with you being filled with him. He pulls back up your panties after and lifts up slightly to push his cum further inside you he doesn’t want anything dripping out of you. He wants it to sit inside of you for the rest of the day/night so that every time you feel filled you remember the sweet love he made to you. I see him enjoying spanking. Bending you over his knee when you’ve been bratty. Or slapping your ass while he fucks you from behind. Eyes winding and mouth watering with he sees you grow wet/wetter from his slaps. Aside from that I see him liking to use his tie to occasionally tie your hands behind your back. Mainly when you’ve been bratty and he wants to fuck you rough. Aside from that at most he would probably use a vibrator on you if you wanted/needed but would prefer to use himself.
Name calling
I don’t think he would be into much name calling. I mean maybe he would be into daddy or sir? Though I see him being softer I could see him having a darker side to him and liking it. But I think he would probably prefer you to names like; love, my darling, husband, baby, both in an out of bed. He would like calling you the same names in an out of bed as well.
Nanami receiving
He loves getting his dick sucked. Groaning at the sound of you lubing him up for your hole. He loves guiding your movements with his hands tangled in your lucious hair. Though he loves this he doesn’t like cuming in your mouth he prefers to cum down your cunny instead. He has a lot of stamina and control so he can prevent himself from cumming down your throat waiting until he uses your other hole.
Thats about the most receiving he likes the rest of the time he’d rather do all the work. Even though technically while you’re sucking him he still doing all the work by being the one to guide all your movements and telling you what to do.
Nanami moaning?
He’ll give soft grunts and moans occasionally. He’ll softly moan and grunt or pant heavily when he finishes inside you. He’s more of a talker than a moaner In my opinion. He loves whispering sweet things into your ears and sushing you quite often. He loves the sound of your moans he doesn’t Sush as a sign to be quiet but more as a sign to “take it” and also out of habit. He’s so used to saying “shh” he sort of does it out of instinct instead of moaning.
All nanami stories by me will be under the hashtag NanamiAria
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nighttimealone · 16 hours
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Cw: Nsfw (Simon and his swimmer gf)
Simon has saved all the photos and footages in his phone, ranging from your daily practices to your competitions, he stores them in a hidden folder, and when he’s deployed, after a long day of training, he’ll drag his legs back to his quarters, body all sweaty and sore. Kick open the bathroom door or shove down his boxers, open one of your videos—that one you took when just finished training, still wearing that speedo and dripping with water, looking at the camera and say with a pout “Miss you so much, Simon. Are you doing good?” You angled your phone highly, made sure he can see the droplets disappear into your barely-exposed cleavage. And He’ll stroke his cock, hard and fast that it almost looked painful, tip red furiously and leaking so much just from watching you tease him that it lubes his palm entirely. He loves and hates when you tease him, pushing his buttons just right and makes him want to fuck you until you’re apologizing stupidly, but he has to wait, wait till the day he can finally go home and take that pretty pussy, and he comes in his hand with a frustrated growl, he missed you too, and he’s been counting the days to meet you again.
If he’s on leave, he’ll follow you to the gym sometimes, sitting on the bench beside the swimming pool, fascinated by how you gracefully swimming in the water, the curves of your lithe body fully shown to him with each lifts and drops of your legs and arms, but he gets jealous sometimes, will stand behind you like a wolf guarding its mate when some blokes try to flirt with you, or if they dare stare at you longer than necessary, and soon all the athletes in the gym knows not to be too intimate with you to avoid the wrath of your bulky and broody man.
Simon’s a cheeky bastard too, he’ll move to stand behind you when you climb out the pool to take a break, fingers hooked under the hem of your speedo, trace along the clothes between your thighs, just barely touching your pussy lips before pulling away swiftly. If you suck in a breath at his antic and glare at him half-heartedly, he will lean down to whisper with a chuckle right into your ear “Just helping you adjust the clothing, sweetheart.”
When you leaving home and out for a week to compete, he will sit in front of the television an hour before your turn to compete, don’t want to miss any chance of you on the screen even if it’s just a few frames here and there. His eyes only on you, and he believes in your skills, holding breath when you dive into the pool, swimming in lightning speed and reach the end first, and spamming texts to other 141 members about you winning the competition again, until Gaz jokes and calls him a lovesick puppy.
But his monkey minds kick in when he sees you stand on the podium, holding up your gold medal proudly with the most lovely smile he could ever imagine from a human being. His mind wanders back to you in the speedo again, hair damp and splay across your shoulders, the exertion from swimming painted your cheeks pink.
So when you finish freshening up and finally have time to call him, he’s already humping your pillow, coming immediately when your voice hits his ear, calling him Simon in that sweet tone before realizing what he’s doing.
“Are you-are you doing what I…?!” You’re voice stutter in disbelief and more with arousal, his low groans and hums come out of the speakers so clearly, making your thighs rub together subconsciously, the clean panties you just put on will pool with your juices when you lie back on the hotel room’s bed, playing with your clit and stuff two slender fingers into your squelchy cunny— god, how you wish they are his thick fingers, which can stretch you full with only two fingers— listening to him pumping his cock and shamelessly admit to you “Yeah, ‘m humping your pillow now, princess. Come back quickly tomorrow so I can fill up that needy cunt of yours properly. Our little champion deserves a congratulation after winning, yeah?”
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nadvs · 9 hours
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push and pull (part two) (end)
pairing twin!rafe x female reader x twin!zach
summary life felt complicated enough when you started falling for zach. then you meet rafe. he’s the complete opposite of his twin brother, but he captures your attention just the same.
content warnings alcohol use, mental illness, mentions of parental abandonment
» intro post | part one
» masterlist
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When Zach wakes up the next morning, he fully understands the term hangxiety.
His temples pound as he stares at his ceiling. At some point last night, he slipped from tipsy into drunk.
Thankfully, he didn’t get so wasted that he’s forgetting anything. But then again, that means every time he made an ass of himself is a memory etched into his brain.
He remembers welcoming his date. Having a decent time with her. Walking her downstairs. Her lips on his cheek when she kissed him goodbye. Feeling like something was missing, and then, that something wasn’t missing anymore when you came downstairs to let him in.
And he remembers looking over at you across the party. Wishing he was next to you. Feeling crappy for thinking about you while he was with another girl. Knowing he was idiot for thinking he could ignore his feelings for you and date someone else.
Talking to you in the elevator. Crap.
He buries his head into his pillow. Why did he blabber to you like that? His brother would kill him if he knew what he said. He probably already wants to kill him for loudly proclaiming how much he loves him in the hallway. Rafe’s not one for any sort of PDA.
Zach picks up his phone to text you: Trauma dumping to you was just a dream I had, right? Please tell me it didn’t actually happen.
You reply minutes later: you mean in the elevator? definitely a dream.
Despite his embarrassment, he smiles at his screen.
He replies: Sorry about that.
You send another text: it’s no problem. i’m guessing you have a pretty bad hangover.
He replies: Everything hurts.
You text back: make sure to hydrate and rest ok?
Zach smiles again. He can’t help but daydream about you coming over, taking care of him, cuddling him.
He’s worried about the consequences of things going wrong if he got into a relationship with you. But God, does he want you.
He replies: Ok :)
When he eventually leaves his bedroom, he sees Rafe lounging on the couch, still in his pajamas. Surprisingly, his brother actually tidied up.
It gives him hope that Rafe really is trying to improve himself. He’s had his fair share of meltdowns and Zach’s had a front row seat to all of them, watching his brother break down into tears, spiralling into his toxic, self-hating thoughts.
Once he calms down, every time, Rafe talks about how he knows he’s not a good person, that he wants to be better. But then, he sticks to his bad habits. He never gets the help he needs, even though Zach encourages him to.
Nonetheless, Zach never saw the bad in Rafe that he’s so adamant is there. At his worst, he can be violent, drunkenly throwing punches at parties, but Zach knows it’s a result of his emotional scars.
“Shit,” Rafe chuckles when he sees Zach. “You’re alive.”
“Barely.” Zach sinks onto the other side of the couch, closing his eyes as he tilts his head back. “You cleaned up for once.”
“Did you just say for once? I’m always cleaning up, asshole,” he mutters, making Zach laugh.
“I hope the neighbors don’t hate us,” Zach says. “The party got kinda loud last night.”
“This guy’s thinking about the neighbors,” Rafe says with a scoff. “The girl you were with looked like she was into you. Bet she would’ve stayed the night.”
“Maybe,” Zach says with a shrug, thinking back to his date.
Then, Rafe says he thinks you might be into him, too, considering he caught you staring. And Zach’s pulse picks up.
He loves and hates hearing that. Because if you really do like him back, it’s exciting, but that makes it even more crushing that he can’t pursue anything.
“Maybe,” Zach echoes.
“The fuck is wrong with you?” Rafe laughs, thinking about how good you looked last night. “I’d jump on that if I had the chance.”
“But you don’t have the chance,” Zach murmurs. “If you love me, you won’t jump on any of my friends.”
Zach sits up and looks at his brother.
“By the way, you never said you love me back last night. I’m still waiting.”
“Yeah,” Rafe snorts. “You can keep waiting.”
────୨ৎ────
On Monday morning, you finally get a response from a student you found online who’s selling a used textbook you need.
You’d rather not go by yourself, so you text the group chat: i need to go to a stranger’s house to buy a textbook tonight. is anyone down to tag along so i’m not alone?
To your relief, Zach texts the group a minute later: I got you :)
That evening, you’re knocking on his front door. Instead of Zach, though, Rafe answers.
“Hi,” you say. “Is Zach around? He’s supposed to come with me to pick a textbook up.”
“Haven’t heard him since he got home,” he says, turning to look up the stairs. “I’ll get him.”
A minute later, Rafe comes down, keys jingling in his hand.
“He’s sleeping,” he says. “I can take you. I was about to go for a drive anyway.”
“Cool,” you say. “Thanks.”
You watch him lean over to slip on his sneakers, his frame broad and tall. It’s surprising that Zach, who’s usually reliable, forgot about your plans. And that Rafe, who you’ve come to known as hot and cold, is willing to help you.
He locks the door behind him before you make your way down the hallway together.
“He must be tired after practice,” you say, well aware of the team’s training schedule.
“Yeah, when he’s asleep, he’s out.”
You smirk to yourself, imagining Zach adorably bundled up in his bed. You already know he’s going to apologize profusely once he realizes he accidentally bailed on you.
“It’s only ten minutes away,” you tell Rafe. “I just wanted someone with me since it’s some random guy I don’t know selling it.”
“Zach didn’t offer to just buy a new one for you?” he asks.
“No,” you laugh, entering the elevator. “Why would he?”
Rafe doesn’t get Zach sometimes. It’s insane that he’s not into you, that he sleeps through plans with you, that he doesn’t offer to buy you something that probably only costs a few hundred dollars.
“Want me to?” Rafe asks. You have to laugh.
“It’s okay,” you say. “I already set all this up. Do you always offer to buy girls school supplies?”
He bites his tongue. If Zach wasn’t so adamant about m not being allowed to try to hook up with you, he’d flirt and say yes, he buys all kinds of things for beautiful girls.
“Not always,” he settles for.
The elevator doors open. You enter the parking garage and follow Rafe to his car, settling into the cushioned passenger seat. He starts the engine, then offers the cable hooked up his radio to you.
“Already know you have good taste,” Rafe says. You smile, plugging your phone in.
You’re Zach’s friend, but he figures you can be his friend, too. Because he wants to get to know what he can about you, to flatter you and joke with you and talk to you, even though the night won’t be ending with you in his bed. He has fun with you. He’ll take what he can get.
He backs out of his parking spot, putting his hand against the back of your headrest as he looks through the rear window. You gaze up at his profile, taking in just how handsome he is, how nice his cologne smells.
Rafe doesn’t know the song you put on, but he likes it. He turns forward in his seat, driving out of the garage.
You chat about your days and even though it’s small-talk, it doesn’t feel like it. There’s an ease with Rafe that you can’t really compare to with anyone else.
Still, he’s kind of intimidating, but you naturally want to keep challenging this way he makes you feel, cracking the wall he has up.
When you reach the house at the end of a dark street, Rafe parks in the driveway, turns his key and takes it out of ignition.
“You can wait here,” you offer.
“Nah,” he mumbles. He unbuckles his seatbelt. “I’m not letting you go alone.”
With Rafe standing behind you as you knock on the front door, the feeling of him protecting you is intoxicating, making your heart pound harder.
The door swings open and you greet the man you’ve been messaging. He’s holding the textbook you need and when you offer him four twenties, he looks through the bills and shakes his head.
“We said $100,” he says.
“No,” you reply. “$80. You said $80 was good.”
“I don’t think so.”
“I have the texts to prove it,” you laugh in disbelief.
“Really, man?” Rafe mutters. “Just give her the book.”
“$100,” he repeats.
“Forget it,” Rafe says. He steps forward, roughly taking your money out of his hand and pulling you by the waist. “I’ll just get you a new one.”
“No, wait,” the guy calls. “$80’s fine.”
“Get fucked,” Rafe mutters. You follow him to the car, still mentally catching up to what just happened. “Trying to scam you over twenty dollars. What a joke.”
You settle in the car, feeling Rafe’s warm, big hand curl your fingers open so he can give you your money back.
He’s fuming, beyond pissed off that someone would try to trick you like that. He’s glad you didn’t come by yourself to have to deal with this idiot alone. And he’s not sure how Zach would’ve handled it.
“How much is a new book?” he asks.
“Like, $250,” you tell him.
“I got it covered, alright?” he says. “Give me your phone.”
You comply, still a little jarred but appreciating how quickly he swept in to help you. You watch him enter digits, call himself to get your number, then hang up.
He returns your phone and takes his out, taps on your number, and quickly opens up a bank app.
“You really don’t have to,” you say.
“It’s fine.”
Within a minute, he sends you $250. It’s bizarre how he’s acting like that much money is nothing. Like he’s giving you change he owes you.
Rafe exhales slowly, starting his car again, coming down from the daze. This happens a lot. It’s like he blacks out when he gives in to his impulses.
But what can he do? He has a weak spot for you and he hates the idea of someone doing you wrong, of him not helping you when he’s totally capable of it.
He scratches his forehead. Zach’s words resonate in his head, telling him he needs to cool down and think before he does things. Sometimes his temper flares with no warning.
He’s sure he came off way too intense. He doesn’t know how to apologize for it. Before he can speak, you do.
“Can you come with me every time I have to buy something?” you say lightheartedly. It eases some of the tension in his chest.
“Was that too much?” he says, tone low.
You smile to yourself. You wouldn’t call it too much. He seems like he’s an intense, passionate person. Beneath the surface, Rafe feels more than he lets on.
“You didn’t let a guy con me, then you bought me a $250 book,” you reply with a laugh. “Trust me, you’re good. Thank you.”
Your phone buzzes with a text from Zach as you back out of the driveway. Crap I’m so sorry. I don’t even remember falling asleep. Did you come over?
You reply: all good! i figured you were exhausted. rafe went with me.
“Guess who’s awake,” you say, the smile apparent in your tone. Rafe glances over at your profile as you text back.
He hates this about himself, the envy that pushes him to be sure that Zach is so much better than him. That every girl, if given the chance, would pick his brother over him.
“So, you were going to go for a drive?” you say, tucking your phone away. Because of his kind gestures tonight, you’re pretty sure that he likes hanging out with you. “Want company?”
Rafe taps his hand against the steering wheel. Even if this is just platonic, he doesn’t want you to leave his car.
“If I can pick the music,” he says.
“You said I had good taste.”
“Mine’s better.”
You laugh, and because he held your waist just a few minutes ago, you don’t feel apprehensive to touch him. You nudge his shoulder. He smirks.
An hour goes by like a minute. When Rafe and you part, your cheeks hurt from how much you’ve been smiling and laughing with him.
You talked together nonstop, touching on the most random subjects, finding similarities and differences. You have a deep crush on him. There’s no denying it.
When Rafe watches you step out of his car, he realizes that this isn’t just attraction like he’s used to. He feels like he knows you. And he likes you. It’s exciting and scary.
When Rafe makes it home, Zach is in the kitchen, the whole loft smelling like delicious food.
“You actually remembered how to get home?” Zach teases over the sound of ingredients sizzling in a pan.
“Lost track of time,” Rafe says. He settles on a barstool as Zach stands at the range, trying not to burn dinner.
Zach is glad his back is to his brother, because when Rafe tells him that he was with you that entire time, driving around and talking, his eyebrows furrow in anger and jealousy before he can subdue it.
“But before you lose your shit,” Rafe adds, “it was all friendly, okay?”
“Right,” Zach mumbles. He stares down at the pan, trying to breathe through his prickly frustration. He’s unbelievably mad at himself for falling asleep after practice.
You can do whatever you want, he knows that, but he feels that even though it’s just as a friend, you’re his, not Rafe’s. And his brother getting to spend time with you feels painfully unfair.
────୨ৎ────
The bright stadium lights pool over the deep green soccer field. It’s a cool evening, perfect for a match.
Cold seeps in through your jeans as you sit on the metal bench on the sideline. You have your phone at the ready to film the team as they rush the field for a home game.
You’ve grown to love your job. You found great friends, the TikTok account is earning more traction, and you’ve started to genuinely enjoy coming out to games and cheering on your school’s team.
It’s been almost a week since your night with Rafe. You haven’t seen him or Zach since. You welcome the distance. Liking them both is ridiculously confusing.
Minutes pass. The crowd is getting louder. The team still isn’t out on the field. Your dad runs a tight ship, so it’s weird that they’re late.
You head into the stadium tunnel towards the locker room, curiosity nagging you. A group of players are standing outside the door and you approach Chance.
“What’s going on?” you ask.
“Something’s up with Zach,” Chance tells you. Alarm rushes through you and you step into the locker room without a second thought.
Zach’s sitting on the bench by his locker, hunched over, surrounded by your dad, the team’s medic, and a few other players.
“Is everything okay?” you ask.
Zach looks up at you. His eyes are sunken, his lips parted. And then, he loses consciousness.
When his eyelids flutter open, the brightness of the room is so painful that he has to squint.
“He’s up,” he hears. It’s you. He hasn’t heard your voice in a while. He misses it.
He slowly comes to, realizing he’s in a hospital bed. You’re sitting to his left. The team medic is standing at the end of the bed with a doctor. He’s hooked up to an IV.
“What happened?” he rasps.
“You’re dehydrated,” the medic explains, leaning over to hand a plastic cup of water to Zach. “You’re at Trinity Hospital. You’re okay. Drink.”
Zach weakly picks it up, downing the cool water, his throat feeling raw. He rolls his head to look at you again. He knows it’s wrong, but he’s relieved that you look so concerned for him. That you’re here.
The doctor introduces herself, then explains that Zach was unconscious for so long that she’d prefer to keep him overnight to monitor him.
The news makes everything in him twist with worry and frustration. He just wants to go home. He doesn’t want Rafe to spiral.
“Okay,” he says. “I’m alright, though?”
“I’m not worried,” the doctor replies. “I just want to be sure you’re in good shape before I send you home.”
Within a few minutes, the doctor leaves the room. Then, the medic encourages Zach to drink more fluids, calls the coach to update him, and asks if you want to head back together now that you’re sure Zach’s okay.
You politely decline. You’re too worried to leave him alone so fast. And shortly after, it’s just you two in the room, listening to the beeps of Zach’s pulse.
“Dehydrated?” you say playfully, but still worried. “What the hell, Cameron?”
“I know,” he says with a smile. He regrets going hard at the gym today. He’s sure that’s what did it. “Rookie move.”
“I specifically told you to hydrate like, two days ago.”
Zach’s laugh is boyish. He reaches for your hand and squeezes. You remind yourself it’s likely nothing more than a friendly gesture.
“That was hangover advice,” he says. His thumb strokes over the back of your hand.
“It was life advice, actually.” You inhale slowly. “I’m glad you’re okay.”
He lets go of your hand, remembering you can hear his pulse right now and not wanting to risk you witnessing it beat faster.
“It was way more than two days ago, by the way,” he says. He threads his fingers through his hair, suddenly self-conscious of how bad he must look right now. “Where’ve you been?”
You look down at your lap. You’ve been declining all the invitations to hang out in the group chat because the past few days have been so confusing.
Seeing Zach with another girl was painful, and then, you realized just how unimportant you felt to him when he slept through your plans, even though it was by mistake. You need time and space to stop liking him before you can hang out again.
“School’s been kicking my ass,” you lie.
“Do you need help?” he asks. He’d do anything to have you around again.
“Leave it to you to be in a hospital bed asking if you can help,” you mumble. Zach laughs. You try and fail not to fawn over his perfect smile.
“Did I faint in front of everybody?” he says, fixing his hair again.
“Not everybody,” you half-laugh. “But, seriously, everyone was really worried. We all care about you a lot.”
His heart warms. He may be in the hospital, but right now, he’s grateful for having people who care about him. It’s all he ever wanted.
“Thanks for coming with me,” Zach says softly. “And for staying.”
You nod. You were so worried that you told your dad you were going with the paramedics when they arrived, not even considering that you had work to do, that Zach was already taken care of.
“Of course,” you reply. “You said you don’t like being alone, remember? In that dream you had?”
Zach huffs a laugh and looks away, embarrassed as he thinks about that night in the elevator, but still appreciative.
“Did anyone call my brother?” he asks.
“I texted him that I’m with you at the hospital. He hasn’t replied yet.”
Zach nods and thanks you. He tries not to fixate on the fact that you have Rafe’s number. He looks at the clock hanging on the wall to see it’s late in the evening. He figures Rafe’s out with friends or with a girl, not paying attention to his phone.
He wishes he could just talk to him. With every second that passes, he worries more and more about Rafe’s reaction to him being here.
“I should’ve grabbed your phone from the locker room so you could talk to him directly,” you say regretfully. “But I told Chance to get your things for you after the game. Is there anyone else I should contact?”
Admittedly, you’re bracing yourself for him to mention the girl from the other night. Or any girl, really. But he only shakes his head no.
A nurse comes in to remind you that visiting hours are up soon. Zach sits up, visibly on edge, asking her when he can have visitors tomorrow. She tells him 9 a.m.
Knowing he won’t be able to see his brother in person tonight makes him anxious.
After the nurse leaves, Zach frantically asks if he can send a voice-note to Rafe on your phone. You open the conversation and hand your phone to Zach, noticing the nervous way he’s chewing on his lip.
“Hey,” he says into the speaker. “It’s nothing. I passed out from dehydration and I’m at Trinity and they’re keeping me overnight just to be sure I’m good, but the doctor’s not worried.”
His eyes flit to you and he swallows hard.
“This is nothing like the last time, okay? I know your mind’s gonna go there and this is not even close,” he continues. “You can come see me at nine tomorrow. And you better bring me food.”
Zach ends the recording, sends it, and gives you back your phone.
“Thanks,” he breathes. You nod, your eyebrows knitting in confusion and worry.
“Sure,” you say. “Is there anything I can do?”
Zach scratches the back of his neck.
“When he answers, please tell him that you saw for yourself that I’m okay,” he says. “He might be a little freaked out.”
You agree, not wanting to pry, and start to collect your things. There’s no television in the room and you feel bad that Zach’ll be left alone with nothing to entertain him. You want to help.
You tell him you’ll be right back, then rush downstairs at a vending machine you saw when you came in. After, you drop by the gift shop. It’s closed, the flowers and balloons locked up, but you’re still able to pick up a book sitting on a rack.
You leave behind more than enough cash for the book on the counter and go back to Zach’s room.
“Snacks,” you say breathlessly when you enter, dropping the bags of chips and candy and the paperback on the bed, “and a book. Hopefully, this’ll keep you entertained. And don’t tell my dad about the junk food. You know how he is about an athlete’s diet.”
Zach smiles at you, his eyes soft. With everything you’ve done tonight, you could simply be showing what a good friend you are, but what if you feel something for him, too?
The mention of his coach is reminder enough of why he doesn’t pursue this. It could get messy. But maybe he should be more like his brother. Taking risks. Allowing himself to do what he wants to do.
“I should go,” you sigh, looking at the clock. “Feel better, okay? We don’t stand a chance of winning without you.”
He laughs, his eyes lingering on you.
“Thanks,” Zach says. You turn to leave. He stops you with a gentle, “Hey.”
You stop, turning back to look at him. Zach takes you in, how good he feels when you’re around, how there’s still a little bit of worry written into your cute features.
He won’t tell you that he wants to you to be his girlfriend. Not like this, when he’s hooked up to monitors, stuck in a bed. He’ll do it when he’s out of here. He’ll do it when he can hold your face in his hands and tell you how much you mean to him.
“Seriously, thank you,” he tells you. “You’re amazing.” You smile at him again. If only he knew how much his words mean to you.
“You’re welcome,” you say.
You’re pacing through the parking lot when your phone buzzes. It’s Rafe calling you. You answer quickly. He says your name, his voice strained.
“I’m here. Is it too late to see him?”
“Yeah, visiting hours are over. I’m just leaving now,” you say, looking around the dark lot in case you can spot him. “But, honestly, he’s okay.”
“Does he…” Rafe pauses. “I think I see you.”
You approach each other under the starry sky, meeting by a line of parked cars.
His eyes are glossy. He’s been crying. No wonder Zach was so worried. He must have known the effect this would have on his brother. There’s more to this than you realize.
“Hi,” you say softly, ending the call. “It’s okay. He’s acting totally like himself.”
“He doesn’t have his phone?”
“No,” you say. “But I made sure someone’ll pick his stuff up for him.”
“What happened?”
“Before the game tonight, he was in the locker room and he looked really tired,” you explain. “He passed out, but he was already sitting and someone caught him, so he didn’t hit his head or anything. They have him on an IV and drinking lots of fluids.”
“Okay,” he mutters. “Fuck. I was at a bar and I wasn’t checking my phone… I got into a cab as fast as I could.”
“It’s okay,” you console him. “He’s good. He was more worried about you than himself.”
Rafe sighs, hands on his hips as he looks down and paces back and forth, hair hanging over his head. You can hear him panting.
“He was worried about me?”
“Yeah.”
“What’d he say?” Rafe asks the question the same tense way he did the night of the party. He’s so closed off, clearly upset at the thought of you knowing anything he doesn’t want you to know.
“I heard the voice-note he sent you,” you admit, “and he said you might be freaked out, but he didn’t tell me anything else. I didn’t ask. It’s not my business.”
Rafe chews on his lip the same nervous way Zach does. For once, you see a similarity between them.
His breathing gets even shallower. He rests his hands on the rear window of the van parked next to him. His body curls forward. His skin is flushed.
You step a little closer, searching his face in the light of the lamps lining the parking lot. He’s distraught.
“Rafe,” you say quietly.
His stare is on the ground, his chest heaving now. Something bad has been triggered in him.
“Hey,” you say.
“You can go home now,” he mutters breathlessly.
“I’m not leaving you like this,” you say. You take a risk, placing a hand on his back, feeling it rise and fall quickly.
“I think you’re having a panic attack,” you say evenly. “I get that this is scary, but I promise you, everything’s okay. Zach is okay.”
Rafe’s chest is tight. His veins are made of ice. He feels like punching something. He hates this familiar loss of control, this shock of the world crumbling around him with no warning.
Yet while he thought that he’d hate someone touching him like this, that he’d hate being so vulnerable, he actually feels a little better.
You continue to rub his back, sweetly and tenderly. The touches he shares with girls are never like this. They’re always superficial, fuelled by lust. But this feels like real, sincere care.
“You took a cab here?” you ask.
“Yeah,” he rasps.
“Did you talk to the driver?”
“What?”
“Did you?” you say. “What kind of car was it?”
It’s all in an effort to distract him, and while Rafe stammers his way through his answers about the driver and the car and the bar he was at, you notice his breathing start to even out.
Minutes later, his heart isn’t racing as fast. His chest isn’t as tight. He can think clearer.
He’s embarrassed, but relieved you were here to talk him down before he ran into the hospital and demanded to see his brother. He now realizes how bad that could’ve gone.
“I don’t…” he stammers. He doesn’t know how to say that this doesn’t happen all that often, that this is a piece of him he typically buries deep from everyone.
“What?”
“You probably think I’m crazy.” Saying the word out loud hurts more than he expected. It’s what he’s felt all his life, that something isn’t wired right in his brain.
“No. I get it,” you say. You shake your head. “I mean, I don’t know what happened, but… I’m guessing he was in the hospital for something before, right?”
Rafe meets your eyes, straightening.
“I get why you’re freaked out,” you say. “I would be, too. Memories can mess with us.”
The way you just calmed him down, the sympathy in your tone, the alcohol swimming in his system are what push him to actually be honest with someone for once in a long time.
“We almost lost him,” he admits. “A long time ago.”
Your face falls in sorrow, eyes searching his face. He looks down at the ground, too uncomfortable to meet your gaze again.
“I almost lost him,” Rafe mumbles, his voice thin. Because, really, he knows he would’ve felt the loss the hardest. His brother is the most important person in his life. Always has been.
And to lose him, someone so irreplaceable, someone he was with from the moment he was a living thing, would kill him. Zach’s right, even though he’s joking, that Rafe doesn’t tell him he loves him enough.
“I’m so sorry,” you say. “How old were you?”
“Fourteen,” Rafe says.
It was mere months after their mother abandoned them, saying she couldn’t stay with their father anymore, that she did everything she could do as a mom, that she was done.
It left a hole in Rafe that he feels every day. If Zach feels it, he does an incredible job hiding it.
He still doesn’t know what the final straw was. Why fourteen years of her sons’ lives was enough for her. How could a parent decide that they had enough of their kids forever?
She wasn’t the best mom, unpredictable and erratic, but he loved her. There had to be something wrong with her mind for her to act like that. To leave. Something that Rafe is sure skipped Zach and was passed on to him.
“That’s so young,” you say sadly.
“He was really sick for a while.” Rafe’s heart twists thinking about it.
How a freak case of pneumonia had Zach bedridden, his lungs fighting to keep breathing. How mad Rafe was at his brother, as if he did it on purpose. How sure he was that in some twisted way, his mother’s sudden abandonment triggered it.
He still regrets how he acted when Zach was discharged. He couldn’t talk to him for days. He was too angry for scaring him into thinking he was going to lose his best friend, his anchor.
“How long?” you ask.
“Weeks,” Rafe tells you. “And you know Zach. He kept telling everyone he was fine. Even as a kid, he didn’t want people to worry about him.”
“He is like that, isn’t he?” you say with a soft chuckle. Since you met Zach, you quickly learned he dismisses any notion of needing any sort of help. “But I promise, this isn’t one of those cases. I saw for myself. He’s good. I wouldn’t lie about that.”
Rafe nods quickly, finally looking at you.
“You’ll see him tomorrow,” you say with a small smile, sad but touched that he opened up to you like this. “Until then, just try to relax.”
Rafe loves the feeling of your hand on him. He can’t remember the last time he loved someone’s touch. If he ever even did.
He’s keeping his promise to Zach. He won’t hook up with you. Because he wants more than that. He wants to know you and for you to know him. He wants you to stay the night, every night. He wants you to be his.
And he needs to be sure you don’t feel anything for his brother.
“Are you and him…” He swallows hard. “Is there anything there?”
Your forehead crinkles in confusion. Zach had told you that his brother was his best friend. You’re sure he would’ve told him if he felt something for you.
If he has to ask, Zach must not talk about you much at all. You’re nothing but a friend to him. Although you do have feelings for him, you were right to be apprehensive from the start. He doesn’t like you like that.
“No,” you finally say.
Rafe nods. At least there’s no unrequited feelings on either side. He must have been reading into things, imagining you looking at his brother a certain way.
“You wanna grab some food?” Rafe asks impulsively.
You agree. Right now, there’s nothing else you’d rather do.
Rafe’s been on a handful of dates before, but sitting across from you at a quiet late-night diner, sobering up, getting to know you more and more makes him feel like he’s living in a dream.
He’s never felt this way about a girl before. Scared in a good way. Slowly, he opens up little by little, peeling back layers of the wall he’s been hiding behind for years.
He shares what happened with his mom. How Zach was the strong one, while Rafe acted out and made his life hell. You take in every word, seeing just how much guilt and shame and pain he carries around.
You open up, too, sharing things you don’t tell many people. He’s a good listener, and the eyes you thought didn’t have much hope behind them at first aren’t cold at all by the end of the night.
It’s one in the morning when you part ways. Rafe shares a cab with you, making sure you get dropped off first, watching you step through the front door.
Everything in him wants to invite you to his place, but things are going to be different with you. He won’t rush into numbing himself with sex like he always does, because he refuses to be numb or absent or checked out with you in any way.
────୨ৎ────
“What kind of grown man forgets to drink water?”
Zach looks up from his orange juice to see Rafe walking into his hospital room.
He chuckles, asking Rafe not to give him shit for this because you already did. The mention of your name makes Rafe’s heart feel lighter in this tense moment.
Because of how good it felt to be so open with you last night, expressing just how important Zach is to him, remembering everything they’d gone through together, Rafe doesn’t shy away from leaning over to hug his brother, who stiffens in his bed.
“Uh, good morning to you, too?” Zach laughs. “Is this a hug? What the hell? Who are you?”
“I love you, too,” Rafe mumbles, pulling back and holding up a paper bag of breakfast for him. “And I got you your food, princess.”
“You try eating hospital food,” Zach replies, taking the bag, feeling ravenous.
Rafe settles on the chair, remembering his brother at fourteen, picking apart at the food they served him with a look of disgust, yet telling the nurses ‘it’s good, thank you’ when they asked if he was enjoying his meal.
Rafe urged his dad to bring his brother home-cooked food almost every day of his hospital stay. It was one of the little ways he showed up for Zach, taking care of him instead of the other way around for once.
“What’d the doctor say?” Rafe asks. “Do you feel better?”
“She hasn’t come to see me yet, but I feel totally fine.” Zach digs into his breakfast. “How are you?”
Rafe looks down at his lap, sighing before he speaks.
“I freaked out,” Rafe admits. Zach stills. “She told me you said I would and you were right. But, man… she knew exactly what to do.”
“It happened when you were with her?” Zach knows what Rafe’s breakdowns look like. He has full-blown panic attacks. He’s nearly inconsolable. He wonders how jarring that must have been for you.
“Out in the parking lot,” he says. “It was just too much. All that shit came rushing back.”
Rafe shrugs, defeated. Sometimes, he’s able to give into the fact that he can do nothing but surrender to the chaos in his mind. He felt safe doing it in front of you last night. He felt safe every second he was with you.
“Are you okay now?” Zach asks. He notices the hint of a smile in Rafe’s face. A brightness he hasn’t seen in him in a long time.
“Yeah,” Rafe says. “I gotta ask you something, though.”
“What?”
“Does ‘off limits’ mean I can’t date her?”
“Date her?” Zach repeats, in disbelief. “You want to date her? Like, commit to her? You don’t commit to anyone.”
Rafe breathes a chuckle, pursing his lips.
“Well, now, I want to.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yeah.”
Rafe looks like he got rid of a ten-ton weight that was sitting on his shoulders. He’s relaxed. He’s content. Zach can’t remember the last time he saw him like this.
Zach became hyperaware of other people’s emotions at a young age. When their parents would argue, he saw what it did to Rafe, who would shut down and lash out. Zach would distract his brother in every way he could.
Then their mom left and it became ten times harder to keep Rafe steady. But Zach did it and he never stopped trying. Because helping others, putting their feelings first, really does make Zach happy.
But right now, he feels really far from happy.
He looks down at his food. He had it all planned out. He’d get in his best clothes, find a nice place to take you, give you a whole speech about how he hasn’t stopped thinking about you for days and how happy you make him and how happy he could make you.
“She feels the same way? Did something happen between you?” Zach asks. His chest is a hole. A pit.
“Nothing happened,” Rafe says, scratching the back of his neck.
It was nearly impossible for Rafe not to give into the impulse to hold your hand in the booth you sat at together last night and tell you how pretty you are and how much fun he has with you.
But he really does want to be a better person. He wants to think before he acts. And that means checking in with Zach that he’s okay with this, considering how tense he is about Rafe getting involved with his friends.
“But I think she might like me, too,” Rafe says. “And I made sure she’s not into you. I guess I was just reading into stuff before.”
That’s the moment Zach’s heart breaks. He licks his lips, his stare low. So, you would’ve just rejected him.
“You really like her?” he asks after a moment.
“Yeah,” Rafe says.
“Why?”
“Don’t make me be corny,” he groans.
Zach’s head is pounding. He wants to be mad at Rafe. But he had so many opportunities to tell him that he likes you, and he was too chicken to admit it. And now, his brother is falling for you. And he looks so happy doing it.
“You’re gonna have to be corny,” Zach says. “I need to be sure you’re not just messing around.”
Rafe sighs. It’s always Zach doing this, gushing over a girl, freaking out over if she hasn’t texted him back, getting all nervous before a date. Rafe used to tease him about it. He gets it now, though.
“You suck,” Rafe scoffs, tensing up. It’s hard for him to talk like this, but he forces the words out. “I don’t know. I like who I am when I’m around her. And it’s… when she’s in the room, everything’s better, you know?”
“Yeah,” Zach says. He knows. He feels the exact same way.
“Is that corny enough for you?” Rafe says with a scoff. “Are you cool with this or no?”
Zach chews his food slowly only to buy time before he has to speak again. He’s trying to act unbothered and it’s working, considering how in the clouds Rafe seems.
He has no idea that Zach is falling for you. Because he’s too busy doing it, too.
He meets his brother’s eyes. He takes a deep breath. And, because Rafe’s happiness has always been more important to him than his own, he gives him his blessing.
“Go for it,” Zach says. “And don’t hurt her.”
He’s never felt so bitter. He hates that he hopes you’ll have a change of heart. He hates that he feels like he’d treat you better. He hates all of this. But he stays silent.
────୨ৎ────
You’re having a late breakfast when Zach replies to your text asking to keep you updated.
Doctor cleared me. I’m home and I got my stuff from Chance. Thanks for everything.
His message is cold compared to how he usually texts. But maybe he’s just tired from the hospital stay.
You gaze out your window, thinking about everything that happened last night. Rafe isn’t as different from Zach as you first thought. Behind his hard exterior, he’s sensitive and gentle and so badly wants to be loved.
He confessed to feeling like something was missing in him since he can remember. The look in his eyes when you told him that to you, he seems perfectly whole, is one you won’t forget.
Being with him for hours was a wonderful haze. You didn’t want to part. He made you feel heard. It’s a joy that you’ve been lacking for a long time.
Minutes later, Rafe texts you asking if he can take you out to dinner tonight. You smile at your screen. You love how you don’t have to wonder about if he wants you.
The restaurant he drives you to is lavish and elegant. Rafe is unbelievably handsome across the table over the candlelight, his dark button-up making his eyes look all the more blue. Your stomach is full of butterflies, yet a sense of calm fills you when you’re with him.
You pick up where you left off, conversation flowing without any effort. He looks at you like you put the stars in the sky. You’re sure you look at him the same way.
When Rafe pulls the car up to your place, in an effort to keep you from leaving right away, he presses his palm against the back of your hand.
“Did you have a good time?” he asks, tone low, adorably nervous.
“Of course. Did you?”
Rafe chuckles at the question. Good doesn’t begin to cover it.
“You’re…” he begins.
“I’m what?” you laugh.
He squeezes your hand gently, turning it so he can lace his fingers with yours. The contact is warm, his ring hard but smooth against your skin. Your heart pounds in your ears as he stares at you.
“Beautiful,” he says. “In every way.”
His tone is sincere and firm. He says it like it’s a fact.
“And I want to keep doing this,” he says. “Seeing you. If you want to keep seeing me, too.”
“I do,” you say. When he leans forward, his kiss is soft but hungry, making your mind spin.
Zach fakes a headache when Rafe gets home. All he needs to hear is that the date went well. He doesn’t want the details.
────୨ৎ────
You’re wrapped in Rafe’s arms, your back flush against his chest, as music and chatter float through the air around you.
You’re settled on his couch, talking with your friends as the party rages. Rafe’s still getting used to what it means to be a boyfriend, tense and quiet around your friends, but he’d get used to anything if it meant making you happy.
You’ve only been dating a few weeks, but he’s sure if this isn’t love, he’s damn close to it. Aside from his brother, you’re his best friend.
You smile when you feel Rafe’s lips press against the side of your neck. He’s ridiculously affectionate, touching you whenever he can, spoiling you, whispering sweet things to you all the time. He’s completely unguarded.
Zach’s in the kitchen, as far away from you as he physically can be. After the hospital, he hasn’t been himself at all. You can tell he’s trying to be, though, forcing smiles around you.
It makes no sense. He called you amazing that night. But, then, he pulled away. It’s like he’s mad at you for dating his brother, but he refuses to admit it.
You’ve asked him multiple times if things are good between you. He reassured you over and over that they are.
Maybe someone else would believe him, but after you pined for him for so long, you can read when he’s trying to hide that he’s upset. At parties, at casual get-togethers, even at work when you’re making content for the team, he’s absent-minded and disinterested.
And whatever’s wrong, he prefers to hold inside.
Nonetheless, while your feelings for Zach have faded, you genuinely hope he’s happy and that you can be friends with him again one day.
The next morning, you wake up in Rafe’s bed. His arm is around your waist, his breath warm against your back. He’s still snoozing when you slip out of bed to get water.
Zach’s sitting at the kitchen island, staring down at his coffee. It’s almost funny how just over three months ago, you were here for the first time, yearning for Zach to give you a hint that he liked you. Now, you’re falling for Rafe.
“Morning,” you say kindly.
Zach looks up from his coffee. His smile doesn’t meet his eyes.
“Hey.”
You open the fridge, the awful feeling he’s been giving you lately sitting heavy on your heart. He makes you feel unwelcome, which is something you never expected from him.
“Just getting some water,” you say, searching through the shelves. “He’s definitely gonna wake up with a headache.”
Zach tenses. You’re doing for Rafe what he daydreamed you doing for him. Sharing a bed with him, nursing his hangover, touching him and smiling at him and giving him what Zach would die for.
You look so pretty in the morning, your bedhead adorable, your pajamas complimenting your figure. Why won’t his heart just catch up with his mind? He keeps telling himself to get over you.
He notices that you have Rafe’s ring on your finger. He used to imagine you wearing his things. He’d love to see you in his team hoodie. But he never will.
In another world, you’re in this kitchen as his girlfriend, talking about last night’s party, sharing kisses and laughs. But not in this world.
“I never asked you,” you say, your back to him, “how was that book I got you?”
You hope it serves as a reminder for how much you did for him and how much you care about him. It hurts, the way he’s been keeping you at a distance.
Late at night, as your mind drifts away from you when you try to fall asleep, you’ve considered the possibility of Zach being upset because he’s jealous of Rafe and wants to be with you.
But Rafe told you he checked with Zach to make sure your relationship was okay with him and he even said he didn’t feel anything for you. Maybe Zach thinks you’re not good enough for his brother and he’s too nice to actually say it out loud.
“Good,” Zach says.
You grab two water bottles and close the fridge door. One word is all he’s willing to say to you.
You can’t do it again. You can’t ask him for the hundredth time if you did something wrong, just for him to say you didn’t and he’s sorry that he made you feel like you did.
You leave him alone in the kitchen, padding up the stairs. Zach looks down at his coffee again. His eyes are starting to burn with tears.
He wants to remind his brother that they agreed they wouldn’t let people overstay. And you being here for even one night feels like overstaying. He can’t have you and every time he’s reminded of that, it hurts.
He can’t stop thinking about that night in the elevator and wishing that instead of drunkenly rambling about his brother, he rambled about his feelings for you. At least then, everything would have been out in the open long before you really got to know Rafe.
The girl he met through the video messaged him last night, asking if he was up to hang out again. She’s cute and nice. But she’s not you. And it’d be wrong to pursue someone just to numb the pain of not having you.
That’s all he wants. You. And because he was such a coward, he’ll never have you. Maybe at some point, he had a chance. Maybe you would have grown feelings for him if he was honest with you.
But you seem happy. So does Rafe, who actually wants hold you and kiss you in public. He was never like that with any other girl.
Zach realizes that while he was always so sure he coped with everything that life hurled at them better than Rafe, he wasn’t paying attention to how destructive he is to himself. His martyrdom was never a virtue.
He’s too late. He self-sabotaged. He has nobody to blame for his aching loneliness but himself. That’s the most heartbreaking part of this whole thing.
Rafe’s hair is tousled, his smile lazy when you come back to bed.
“Thought you left me,” he murmurs tiredly into your hair, pulling you tight against his warm body. You smile, your cheek pressed against his chest, breathing in his comforting scent.
Rafe’s sure you can feel his pulse on your cheek. He feels like you own every beat of his heart.
“I wouldn’t leave you,” you tell him.
The tension from what happened downstairs leaves your system. You swallow down the tears that threatened to fall when you left the kitchen.
You plant a kiss on Rafe’s chest. You know where you’re wanted. And you’re happiest staying there.
(the end)
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104 notes · View notes
mrghostrat · 2 days
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Haven’t been on tumblr in a long time.. I remember your streamer au, but nothing more. Id appreciate a small recap! :3
HII! for anyone who hasn't read it, it's a very slice-of-life collection of scenes for the most part, so there's loads of lil scenes i'll leave out of this. but here's a look back at the overall friends-to-lovers plot!
and they were streamers (10/16) (unfinished wip)
aziraphale and crowley are full time twitch streamers who live together in a london townhouse. crowley streams whatever he wants, usually toxic pvp games and "just chatting" hanging out and drinking. aziraphale streams all kinds of wholesome crafty content, such as cooking, baking, reading, and book binding.
crowley has been in love with aziraphale since... god, far too long. he'll never say anything because he knows aziraphale only sees him as a friend
aziraphale is bombarded with a hate raid during pride month, and is severely ill-equipped to moderate it himself. crowley jumps in to shut it down and fix his security settings to protect him further.
aziraphale brings crowley a cup of tea one stream (standing off-camera) when he's heavily focused on a game. he startles at the sudden presence, shouting "angel" accidentally for everyone to hear. aziraphale doesn't mind, but the chat go nuts speculating over the pet name and his relationship with his roommate
furfur, a sub-par streamer and tea-spill investigator, notes a connection on twitter between this "angel" and and old stream clip where crowley is caught ranting and rambling (very smittenly) about an "angel" in his life.
aziraphale's chat starts to wonder about the fondness between him and his elusive off-screen roommate
crowley posts in aziraphale's chat asking if he can have a bite of what he's cooking. he goes to the kitchen to try some, but the chat is too distracted freaking out that the notorious crowley is watching an aziraphale stream to realise aziraphale has actually handed a plate off camera. aziraphale seems troubled when he notices the chat is so beserk, so crowley makes a secret side account to send him a donation and tell him to keep up the good work
aziraphale comes home to find crowley in a discord call, playing party games with anathema, newt, and nina. he settles in beside him on the couch to join in.
crowley surprises aziraphale by raiding him at the end of his stream. he uses his 3,000 viewers to ask if aziraphale plans on going to a twitch meet-up in edinburgh. when crowley finally asks himself, aziraphale says yes.
the dark council, a huge and popular UK twitch team, tweets their curiosity about crowley's elusive roommate, wanting anyone with sleuthing abilities to spill the tea for them.
shaxx encourages furfur to investigate his theory that aziraphale and crowley live together, wanting him to impress the dark council twitch team to grow both their streams.
aziraphale and crowley drive to edinburgh together, playing games in the car, answering questions on twitter, and have a tense conversation on what to do if you harbour a secret crush. aziraphale thinks you should go for grand gestures, but crowley thinks it's best to bottle things up.
they attend the meet-up at a packed pub. crowley introduces aziraphale to beelzebub and promises to stick by his side, but as the drinks start flowing, they both get more comfortable to mill around and socialise on their own.
furfur, hired as the photographer for the event, arrives only after crowley and aziraphale separate from one another. but at the end of the night, gets a photo of them leaving the pub together in a drunken giggle fit, looking like smitten lovers. shaxx and furfur speculate they might be more than just roommates.
back in london, aziraphale makes plans for his holiday fundraiser stream. his viewers suggest a "roommate reveal" for £5,000. both he and crowley are flabbergasted that anyone is even slightly interested. furfur rushes to compile a tea spill twitlonger before the fundraiser.
while planning for his christmas events, aziraphale bakes a practise batch of angel cake on stream, crowley's favourite. he jumps up from the couch to eat a slice, accidentally wandering straight onto camera-- spoiling the fundraising surprise, and ruining furfur's tea spill. they're trending on twitter the next day.
aziraphale is hate raided again, but this time the raiders hack into his chat bot. crowley rushes in to reset the bot's data before they can export years of chat logs and sensitive viewer information. when the raid is halted, aziraphale is relieved, then devastated to realise everything has been wiped, until crowley assures him he made a backup of the logs, a la saving his books.
aziraphale finally realises he loves crowley. he's so overcome with affection for him, it starts to freak crowley out. crowley thinks he's getting swept up in the christmas season and is reading into affection that isn't actually there, and aziraphale thinks he's making crowley uncomfortable by upsetting the status quo
aziraphale becoems downtrodden by how closed-off crowley is being, and crowley panics when he realises he hasn't been subtle at all. he promises aziraphale hasn't done anything wrong and that he's just in his own head about their upcoming christmas party with their mods. aziraphale tries to believe him.
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cherubharrington · 2 days
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Rafe x Latina!Popstar reader
{this doesn’t follow the show’s plot, I’m using labios mordidos by kali uchis and Karol g. https://youtu.be/RPcGDkjyhlI?si=8O1jssXsUqmSghhD, the performance this is based off of}
You’d lived in the outerbanks for most of your life. But you were dreaming for bigger. You didn’t hate it, you were a kook. But you never really felt like you belonged. You had dreams bigger than what outerbanks could hold. —Your parents could tell from when you were a child how talented you were. You had a voice and you knew how to dance. They put you through piano lessons, singing lessons, anything and everything they could think of. It eventually paid off.
“I don’t understand, I get it. It’s a big dream of yours. But don’t you get it. It’s going to take you away from me.” Your boyfriend Rafe said.
You looked at the ground;conflicted. “I know, Rafe. But I need to try. I need to see it through.”
It had led to the nastiest breakup you’ve ever had. Both of you sobbing, Rafe trying to hold onto you. Not letting you go. But it was final, your dreams were the love of your life. And you were going to chase them. Cause unfortunately, you loved music more than Rafe.
“La nena esta encendí’a, se me pega como un tattoo.” You sang into your mic, your body on the ground, your butt in the air. The dancers in front of you. “Yo te doy garantía que nadie estás dura que tú.”
Rafe watched on the tv; his jaw ticking.Sarah and Wheezie had decided to turn the tv on to this. To you performing for all your fans. You looked so beautiful, a ping of hurt spread through him like a wave. He missed you so much.
“Wow, I knew she would make it big.” Wheezie said, mesmerized.
“Right.” Sarah said, eating popcorn from her bowl. Rafe watched as two of the guy dancers lifted you into the air and helped you roll your body like a wave. His jaw ticked again. He was feeling all kinds of emotions.
“How does it feel, Rafe? Must sting.” Wheezie said, that did it for him.
“Shut up, Wheezie!”
“Jeez, calm down. I was only kidding.”
“She was joking, Rafe.” Sarah says.
He got up abruptly, knocking something over. “Rafe!” Then leaving the room. He went into his room, his head in his hands and tears following down his face. His leg shaking.
Once the show was over, you had immediately gone backstage. The adrenaline was running high and you felt good. This is all you’ve ever dreamt of. All you’ve ever wanted. A call comes from your phone.
It reads:
Sarah
You instantly pick it up.
“Hey.” You say, drinking a cold bottle of water.
“Hey! I’m so proud of you, me and Wheezie were just watching.” You can feel her smiling through the phone. You hear Wheezie cheering on the other end.
“Thank you! I feel like this is so surreal.” You pause. “Did- did uh Rafe see?”
“Uh—he did.”
“Y/n! We have to do interviews now! Wrap it up!” Your manager says, interrupting your conversation. You smile and nod.
“I have to go. Tell him I miss him.”
“Yeah, no problem.”
You hang up and sigh. You know Sarah probably won’t and you understood why. You follow your manager out… your mind on Rafe, who’s miles away.
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gothicrazor · 20 hours
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Anything for you
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Kurt Wagner x Fem!Reader || Rating: PG(?) || WC: 1.4k
Inspiration: Foreigner's God - Hoizer
Content Warning: afab reader, unrequited love (both reader + Kurt), Kurt pining
Authors Note: First time writing for X-Men! Please be kind to me I'm trying pookies, hopefully this turns out okay or I might actually weep! I dunno if anyone would want a part two of this, just lemme know ig??? Also let it be known I used deepL for the few things he said in German... Please don't hate me 😔
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Who knew the kiss on the back of a gloved hand could really tank someone's mood as quickly as anything else at a typical Saturday night dinner. Watching the gleam drain from your eyes across the table was something he's sadly used to now. Following your eyes to the end of the table to what he knew you were staring at.
His dear sister and one of his closest friends. Rogue and Gambit. The strongest "couple" next to their leader and his wife. A force strong and immovable. Rogue, too scared to stray. And Gambit, too loyal to look anywhere but her eyes half the time.
And it kills you. Anyone who knows you can see your heart break every time they connect.
Thankfully, no one seems to be paying attention to you, no one but the blue mutant across the table from you. He finds it hard to keep his eyes anywhere but on you. Always has since you met all those years ago. He's seen you at your best, the fierceness burning behind your eyes during the heat of battle. And at your worse... Grieving the loss of something you could never have in the first place.
Your chair screeches, moving across the hardwood of the dining room harder than you intended. Standing up too fast, everyone stared in surprise.
"I'm gonna turn in early." Scott's brow rose behind ruby quartz shades as he stood up.
"Everything okay?" You smile, trying to keep up the facade, not wanting to openly weep in front of the team you call family.
"Just a little tired from training." You grab the edge of your half-eaten plate of dinner before you're met with the rough hand of Logan next to you on your wrist.
"Leave it kid, go get some shut eye." His face almost looks slightly worried, as you don't even put up an argument as usual. Just nodding, you push your chair in and hurry out of the dining room.
Kurt watches you leave, tilting his head to watch you rush up the foyer stairs as chatter picks back up at the table.
"Do you think she's sick?" His ears perk up to the concerned whisper of Jean's voice, looking at Scott as he sat back down at the head of the table.
"It's not unlike her to keep quiet when she's not feeling the best."
"She's barely been eating more than half her food in the past week Scott, I'm starting to get worried. She hasn't been like this since the Professor died." Kurt's head turns, chiming in with his usual soft tone.
"I'll check on her after dinner." Jean and Scott both looked at him. Jean smiling softly as she squeezed his shoulder.
"Thank you, Kurt. She'd probably talk to you before any of us." He nods, his dark hair bouncing lightly before turning his attention back to dinner.
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Walking down the hall, he stops at your door, glancing at your nameplate before raising his fist to knock. Freezing for a moment, knowing you'd expect him to come upstairs anytime after you left. Why should he bother to knock at this point?
But Kurt is quite literally a creature of habit. So he does.
Two soft wraps hit the door before grabbing the knob, edging the flat wood open to peek inside. Your room is still dimly lite, only the moon from your window cast over the person-sized lump under the covers of your bed. A soft mutter of your name leaves his lips, yellow eyes glowing as he looks down at the bed.
"Can I come in?" A whimpered 'yes' is all he gets in return, stepping inside with the subtle click of the door closing behind him. The familiar creak of the bed fills the room as he sits on the edge, tail curling over your legs covered by blankets. Hand meeting your side under the covers, eyes falling to their usual worried state, like every time he's comforted you this way before.
Rubbing gently over your lower back, he doesn't say a word, just feeling the slight tremble of your body hidden away from his line of sight. You sniff, pulling the blanket from over your head to look at him, eyes bloodshot and miserable looking. Something he's seen too many times before but still breaks his heart seeing you like this.
"Can you lie with me, please?"
"Anything for you, mein Schatz." He gets up, walking around the bed, pulling the covers back as he climbs in next to you. Fixing them back in place, you assume your natural spot of your head on his chest and his arm around your shoulder. The gentle rub of his hand down your bicep in a soothing gesture.
"Are you okay?" His voice barely raised above a whisper, his cheek settling onto the top of your head. You take in a sharp bit shaky breath trying to calm yourself.
"It's getting harder and harder to be around them... I don't..." You choke up for a second, breathing out a soft whimper.
"I don't know... How much longer can I stand to see them together... It's so unfair of me to feel this way because he'll never love me... Not like Anna, but I just can't... Stop it. I just - I feel terrible for so many reasons." Kurt hugs you tighter, knowing that feeling all too well. Unrequited affections for someone who'll never see you as anything more than a good friend. It almost hurts him knowing you're feeling how he feels constantly.
"I know, I wish I could take the pain away from you." You shudder, sniffling against his chest. Tears welling up in your eyes as you hold onto him like a lifeline, trying to ground yourself in desperation. Squeezing your eyes shut, the tears slipped, soaking the front of his suit.
"I feel so stupid." You whine, starting to hiccup against him, tears sliding past your lashes in groves. Kurt shushes you, moving his hand to your back to cradle you closer. Sharp claws raking over the back of your uniform, gentle touch as he always has with you. His hand moves up, thumb rubbing over your cheek and turning up your chin to look at him.
"You are not stupid, meine Liebe. It's okay to feel this way. The heart wants what it wants. Unforgiving or not, you can't help that."
"Why does it have to be him of all people?" His lips turned to a frown, seeing the hurt behind your eyes. Still wiping your eyes with his thumb, he just shakes his head.
"I wish I could give you the answers. Remy is... A kind man who deeply cares for those he loves. I can see the appeal. But you'll be okay. Eventually, I'm sure of it. You're very strong after all." You just blink, breath quivering as you start to calm down a bit.
"I'm strong..." You mutter under your breath, making him smile slightly before your head goes back to him. Finding his shoulder to lean on, you take in a deep breath, shutting your eyes as you exhale and repeating the words like a prayer.
"Ja, the strongest I know."
"Thank you, Kurt, I don't know what I'd do without you." You give a weak smile as you relax against him, feeling his head leaning against yours.
"And you'll never have to find out, that's a promise." You smile a little wider, a chuckle escaping your lips.
"Can you keep holding me for a little while longer?" He smiles against the top of your head, soaking in the shared warmth between the two of you.
"Of course." You sink into his body, putting your full weight against him. His grip tightened around you. Taking in a deep breath, his eyes wandered from your relaxed expression to the window. Watching the night sky as you slowly drift off in his arms.
Feeling you go slack in his grip, Kurt looks at how relaxed you are now. Thumb moving back over your delicate features like a feather. Something he's done too many times now. But you're so beautiful to him. He can't help but want to touch you. Lips pressing the crown on your head, lingering longer than necessary.
"Ich liebe dich..." His eyes shifted back down to your face, waiting for a reaction he never got. Good or bad. It's just another confession that's gone unheard dozens of times now. No matter how much he's said it.
Smiling at your sleeping expression, he moves down the bed. Shifting onto his side to hold you against his chest. His tail wraps around your waist as he keeps you close.
Cherishing the little moments, he gets to pretend he has your heart... No matter how much it hurts his heart.
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♡Thanks for reading♡
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better off without me ◦ . ◦
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synopsis: Aventurine thinks he knows what's best for the both of you. a/n: angsty oneshot I wrote based off of a prompt from here. tags: angst, aventurine, aventurine x reader, sad ending
ao3 link here!
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You watch as the blond gambler saunters into the house, acting as if his very presence didn’t make your heart bloom and wilt simultaneously. 
“Did you miss me, sweetheart?”
The last few weeks blur in your mind. All those days and nights anxiously watching your phone, waiting for a text. A call. A note. Anything to let you know he’d be back, or that he was doing fine, or that he was thinking of you. Maybe even an “I’m missing you” but, clearly, for the gambler that was too much. 
You thought he had changed. You thought maybe there was something blooming, between the long nights and the expensive gifts. 
With the way the gambler was acting, as though nothing had changed, despite not returning any of your messages for weeks, there was nothing.
You ball your fists, tears stinging your eyes, as you rise from the living room couch and come to stand a couple feet away from him.
“Where were you?” you demand, trembling. “Where were you all this time?”
You see a hint of an emotion pass through his face. Could swear that it was guilt, sadness, pity. Even self-hatred. But just as soon as it had come, it was gone, and he was back to his strange grin.
“Don’t you remember? I told you I was going on an assignment before I left.”
“Why didn’t you return any of my calls? Or my messages?” Hot droplets trail rivers down your cheeks, pitter-pattering on the ground. “You could’ve let me know you were okay. Or alive.”
“I was busy, darling. I couldn’t—”
You smack him across the face. 
“Busy? Too busy for me?” You practically scream at him. The impact of your hit knocks off his serene mask, and now he’s looking at you with a stunned expression. “You didn’t have time for just one text back. Just one!
“Just one would have been enough,” you sob, pulling away and clapping a palm over your mouth as though you were trying to stem an open wound.
Aventurine looks away, and this time the expression of guilt doesn’t fade away when it comes. You stand there, waiting for an answer or an explanation, or even an angry insult. Anything. But the gambler doesn’t say anything.
“Do you even care about me at all? Did you ever care, all those nights? All the times we hung out? All those gifts you sent me?” The tears blur your vision now, and you wipe them away.
The gambler still doesn’t respond. 
“Say something!” you yell.
“No, you’re right,” he says, and if your heart was already broken it felt as though he ground the pieces into the dirt with his heel. “You’re right. I’ve been terrible to you.”
“No, that’s not what I wanted to hear,” you say, almost too choked up to speak. “That’s not what I want. I want you to apologize, tell me you’ll try harder next time.”
“Sweetheart, you don’t deserve me,” Aventurine says, looking at you. “You should move on.”
“No!” you yell. Why was he just giving up so easily? “I want to save us, why don’t you understand? Why won’t you try to hold on to us like I am?” 
Aventurine goes quiet again, and you can’t handle it anymore, your body wracking from each sob you let out. 
“Fine. Leave. Go. And never come back again.” The words are barely perceptible in between your cries.
Aventurine freezes for a moment, looking at you as if to verify that this wasn’t a joke. When you don’t respond, he moves towards the door, and you watch him. Just before he leaves, he pauses, looking back at you for a long time, as though committing your form to memory.
And then he’s gone.
You crumble to the floor, crying and sobbing and wailing until you’re exhausted and empty.
♤♤♤
Aventurine looked at the text you sent.
How’s your assignment going? I miss you.
He sighed. It had been five hours since he touched down on this planet, and here you were, checking up on him.
He didn’t hate it. In fact, he loved it. It’s took every ounce of his strength not to reply to you. 
But that was precisely why he couldn’t let himself reply.
The arrangement was meant to be temporary, noncommittal. He’d drop by for a night or two, then move on. Two nights became three, an afternoon became an evening, and a quick text became an hour long conversation. It wasn’t long after that he’d begun to shower you with gifts and affection throughout the day.
During one of your conversations over text, he’d typed in that’s what I love about you into the text bar.
Love? No, this was never supposed to turn into love. 
But one thought turned into another, and suddenly he was recounting all the things he loved about you in his mind. I love your smile. I love your laugh. I love when you pout because something hasn’t gone your way. I love, I love, I love.
And then the thoughts of everything between the two of you flooded over him. The way he bought you gifts, the way you smiled at him, the way you checked on him throughout the day, the way he loved curling up with you at night. 
Disastrous. No one was ever supposed to love him, least of all you. He was a hot mess of a man, distrustful and beaten and broken through and through. He was hateful, and awful. Unloveable.
He hit backspace, erasing what he had written. Replaced it with lol yeah. And decided then and there and he would slowly start to end things. 
To protect you from himself.
So he’d text you a little less throughout the day. Stopped giving you gifts. You didn’t notice it, because it was only a week and then he went to his assignment, where he decided he would cut it all off, then and there. 
He watched as you texted him, and then didn’t respond. Watched as your texts turned from joyful, to confused, to sad, to desperate. You didn’t stop texting him, though. You texted him almost everyday. Ironically, Aventurine realized what the full extent of your love was as he was cutting you off, but he couldn’t turn back now. It was better this way, he told himself. You were better off without him. 
But when he came back, he realized he couldn’t keep himself away from you. He had to see you one last time.
So he paid you a visit, deciding to act as though nothing was wrong, just to twist the knife a little. To make sure you would absolutely hate him. And then when you told him to leave, he left. But not before giving you one last glance, memorizing your form in his mind, your tearstained cheeks he could kiss every day for the rest of his life, your wet eyes he could stare into forever. The anguished look on your face he desperately wished he could turn into a smile.
But there was no turning back now.
You’re better off without him. Yes, that’s what he tells himself as he lays in bed tonight and holds his phone to his heart, your past text messages displayed on the screen. That’s what he tells himself as a single tear falls from his lashes, wetting the pillowcase beneath him. 
You’re better off without him.
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dividers by @cafekitsune!
reblogs and comments appreciated!
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l0lita-luv · 1 day
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More head cannons!!! Maybe how she would be in a relationship on a regular degular day? Thinking slice of life type stuff 😭❤️‍🔥
Anon I love you so much for this! I’m guessing you’re taking about Ellie so here you go!!
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What a day looks like with Ellie! Headcanons
Ellie Williams x Fem!reader
Fluff!
warnings-use of y/n-reader is described a little more as a fem
a/n- So sorry for posting so late! I’ve been super busy but finally finished it up today!!
Morning
Ellie is not a morning person!
Veryyyy touchy especially in the morning
You always have to beg her to let go of you so you can go make breakfast
“Ellie I have to go start breakfast!” You tell her for the hundredth time, “No! Stay.” Ellie snaps back. “Ok but don’t start getting whiny on me when you’re hungry.” You respond in a light tone, Ellie scoffed, “I do not whine!” She yells back offended.
Once she falls asleep again you have to carefully sneak out of bed
She finally wakes up after another thirty minutes
While you’re cooking, she likes to snake her hands around your waste and nuzzle her face into your neck
“Ellie, please stop stalling and get ready for work please.” You have been pleading with her for the past thirty minutes, she hates leaving you alone in the house, “I’m not stalling! But ok, ok I’ll go get ready.” She huffs going upstairs.
Afternoon
I’m not completely sure of what she would do for work but, she gets off of work around 3-4pm when she’s lucky
Today was one of those lucky days!
When she gets back from work, girl is tired!
But feels better when she walks in and sees you, and smelling the scent of her favorite lunch
You usually asks her about her day and she just starts ranting to you about different ways her co-workers made her upset!
“I literally told him the deadline was by the end of last week! And he turns it in today?” Ellie rants upset that her boss got upset and her too.
Usually takes a shower with you
Nighttime
The two of you always finish the day by watching some show you somehow got her to watch such as 90 day fiancé
She swears she only watches it with you but secretly watches episodes without you!
She got caught once because she accidentally gave you a spoiler
When you two eventually go to sleep, this girl tries to keep you up later with her knowledge of space facts!
It works all the time, you two usually end up sleeping at one in the morning!
Loves spooning you and holding you really tightly
Holds your hand while cuddling sometimes
Whispers sweet nothings into your ear until you fall asleep
Night/morning + cuddling headcanons with Ellie…
wc- 381
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aesthetictarlos · 2 hours
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I don't think Buck has realised how much Tommy hides behind that confidence and coolness and smoothness he shows. Of course he knows there's a story there, knows about Gerrard and that Tommy doesn't talk to his parents but he doesn't know about his insecurities, about his past, yet.
Doesn't know that Tommy's fucking terrified because he might not have abandonment issues like Buck does, but a lot of people left him behind. He doesn't know that Tommy's still learning how to let someone in, how to let someone take care of him, how to be vulnerable. Doesn't know that Tommy still has nightmares from his time in the army, doesn't know that he's the first person to make Tommy feel like he matters, like he's worthy of love. Doesn't know that Tommy still struggles to show his emotions because no matter how many therapy sessions he attended, sometimes he still feels the need to bottle everything up and shove it down. Doesn't know that Tommy's insecure, too, that sometimes he looks at himself in the mirror and sees the asshole he was a few years back.
He's not being naive, it's just that Tommy's so cool and funny and sarcastic and he always knows what to say, what to do and they're still in the honeymoon phase and things are great and their bubble is so nice but then one day something bad happens and he would like to help, to be there for his boyfriend but he realizes that Tommy's holding back, because that's what he's used to doing. He takes care of himself, he hides and licks his wounds, because he's never had someone like Buck before.
Buck doesn't know what to do when his boyfriend clams and shuts down and barely talks to him. He doesn't know what to do when Tommy's distant but still looks at him fondly, doesn't know what to do when he wakes up in the middle of the night to Tommy's quiet sobs. He just reaches a hand out and brushes his palm up and down Tommy's back, soothing him as best as he can, and when the next morning Tommy crumbles in the middle of his kitchen while Buck is making them breakfast, Buck is right there, holding him up and holding him close.
He tells Tommy that he can be vulnerable with him, that he won't leave, that he wants everything, the good and the bad, and patiently listens to Tommy telling him that he doesn't know how to be vulnerable, because he never had someone picking up his pieces before. He listens as Tommy finally tells him about his father and his heavy hands on his tiny body, tells him about the screams he heard at night when their parents fought, tells him about the group homes he lived in because no one would want to foster or adopt a ten year old, tells him about the army and that one time he watched his co-pilot bleed out on the cold sand of the desert. Buck listens as Tommy tells him about Gerrard, and his early days at the 118 and the guilt that still eats him alive sometimes. Buck listens as Tommy tells him about his disastrous dates, about the first guy he hooked up with, a guy that wasn't as patient and soothing and delicate as Tommy has been with him when they had sex for the first time. Buck listens as Tommy bares his soul to him, crying his eyes out and handing him parts of him he kept hidden for years.
Buck listens to him patiently, and holds him, murmuring promises into his ears. I love you, all of you, even those parts you hate. I'm not going anywhere, I'll take care of you, I'll show you how much I love you every day. You are everything I've always wanted. I'm here, I got you, I have your back. I love you. I love you.
For the first time, in that kitchen, with Tommy still crying into his arms, Buck realizes that yeah, Tommy handed him the missing piece of his heart but he did the same for Tommy. He realizes that they healed each other, and there's a reason why it never worked with anyone else before.
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I saw a few posts floating around about an AU where Janus is introduced first instead of Virgil and is the one to get accepted first and tbh I absolutely love that idea and I may have to draw something for it
Janus gets to sing in the song Lies like he wishes he did in canon
He was the one who kept the other darks hidden and slowly let them out so it'd be interesting to see him trying to do that whilst being a recognised good guy, sure he has 6 arms but is 2 enough to hold each dark side at bay when he's not there?
If he ducks out there'd have to be a montage in the first part of Thomas going around and telling the truth about everything and it making his life start to crumble
Janus leaves the dark in the same way Virgil does after AA
Without him there the dark side is basically in anarchy
I imagine Orange to be Wrath/Rage/Anger/smth like that, so I imagine without Janus there he'd just be screaming and throwing stuff around nearly 24/7
Remus' is somehow even more unhinged
Being left alone to deal with those two maniacs (mentioned just above) leads to Virgil basically going insane and hating Janus even more than he does in canon because he used to be the one to calm down the other two (I imagine he and Virgil used to sip coffee together whilst watching Remus and Orange fight in the living room)
Even though Virgil is terrified of him, he forms a very shaky friendship with Remus and they bond over their what-ifs and pain over Janus
Janus is so focused on his friendships with the lights and Thomas that he lets his guard down for a moment and that leads to the dark sides to start rebelling (not sure which one would be revealed first, my gut says Virgil but maybe it'd be cool to leave him til later)
I'm super curious of what Virgil would be like as a villain introduced in season 2, how he would look, if he would still be called Anxiety or something else like Paranoia (which I think could be fitting if he was introduced later on like I said in the last point)
After Accepting Anxiety in canon Patton and Virgil formed a familial-like bond, in this AU Patton and Janus are more marriage-coded
Janus and Virgil's dynamic is a very obviously one-sided hatred. Virgil looks ready to jump at him and rip his head off whilst Janus looks at Virgil with pure grief and regret (because there's absolutely no way that Virgil will trust him ever again, at least in his eyes)
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gothamhappiness · 17 hours
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Being in a relationship with Bruce Wayne: a journey - Hi, Jason (Part V)
It's a big series about an afab!reader who doesn't like Bruce Wayne and who still falls in love with him (he fells quicker and harder)
Reader's origin story // Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4
Warnings: no proof reading, Jason's relationships with Bruce and Dick are discussed, mentions of Joker, violence, death
You met with Dick again in a bookstore. At first, you thought that it was quite a strange coincidence, until you saw him trying to talk with a very big boy who didn’t seem very interested in talking with him. Dick appeared upset ; the other boy was just shrugging and trying to focus on the books in front of him. 
You hesitated to go to them; you didn’t want to intrude. You weren’t too sure to recognise the other boy, but his face somehow seemed familiar. What decided you was where they were standing: the classic literature aisle of the store. Which was what you were looking for when you entered the shop.
You thought you could just say hi and then leave them alone if your presence was annoying them. You carefully walked to them.
“Hey Dick” you greeted the boy who turned around and instantly smiled at you. 
You weren’t too sure if it was a real smile yet, so you didn’t come closer to him, but his answer showed he was actually glad to see you.
“Hey, Y/N! What are you doing here?” he asked
“Buying books I guess.” you teased “I was looking for Mansfield Park or Emma, now I finished Pride and Prejudice” you said. 
The big boy to whom Dick was trying to talk to, quickly turned around and looked you up and down. He watched you with curiosity sparkling in his green eyes. Dick took his chance before his brother could go back to the cover of the book he was holding.
“Y/N, this is Jason, my little brother. You seem to share the same taste in books” Dick introduced the two of them
“Hi, Jason” you smiled as you cautiously observed him, remembering who he was now you knew his name.
You remembered what you read about Bruce and his son “who came back from the dead” and all the headlines about “Bruce arguing with his adoptive son”. It had quite broken your heart at the time.
“You’re Bruce’s new girlfriend?” he asked you quite bluntly
“I hate titles and I hate to feel like a possession. But yes, I'm currently seeing Bruce.” you replied and Jason nodded “I’m surprised you heard about me.” you added. 
“Didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. It's just that things are rocky with Bruce.” Jason said and you reassuringly smiled at him “And yeah, everyone is talking about you in the “family”. Dick and Tim said you were nice.” Jason explained his first coldness to you
“I understand; Bruce isn’t always easy and you don’t know me” you nodded
“Ah yeah?” Jason arched an eyebrow at you. 
He had expected you to take Bruce’s defence, like everyone else.
“Let’s say that I like challenges.” you smiled “And I’m not Bruce’s lawyer” you joked
“You should thank god for that, or you would have a lot of work” Jason grinned and you could tell Dick was quite happy about the current interaction.
“Can I buy the two of you a drink or something? Or a meal” you asked. “There is this sweet little café right outside the bookstore” you offered
You actually wanted to know more of them. Jason was curious about you so he agreed. Dick wanted to come as well, but he quickly received a call from Büdhaven. He reluctantly left the two of you together. Dick would have enjoyed some time with his brother too, but maybe you would help. If you helped with Bruce, he was certain you could do pretty much anything. At the same time, he really hoped Jason wasn’t going to scare you away from the family as a way to avenge himself.
But you knew better; you had met Red Hood before and you liked him.
You settled in the café. You started to talk about literature at first. You were both passionate so it was a good conversation starter. You gave each other some recommendations and debated on characters you liked or disliked. Your point of views on characters were often based on your experiences, so it naturally led to a conversion about each other’s lives. And of course, you arrived at the subject of Bruce Wayne.
“I’ll tell him to apologise to you. He shouldn’t have acted that way even if I do agree with the no killing rule” you said “You’re both right in a way, but… Bruce should have talked to you, he should have let you know what was going on with the Joker and why he couldn’t kill him. Why you couldn't kill him either. He should have been there to appease your anger, not the opposite” you said
“You’ll quickly learn that he doesn’t talk much. Especially not about his feelings. If it gets too personal, he’ll push the subject away. If it can hurt him, he’ll run away. He's a bad dad for that. And he might be a bad partner to you as well” Jason told you
“I’m sorry about what happened to you. It must have been so difficult to wake up without your family. And in a body you didn’t know. You did good, despite the murders and everything. Actually, Red Hood has always been my favourite vigilante” you admitted without commenting on the last part of Jason’s words. You wanted to believe that Bruce would make an effort for you.
Jason chuckled as you mentioned his vigilante persona.
“It’s true you never wrote anything bad about me. I thought you were scared of me… Until I realised we actually met” he teased, his eyes litting up
“Oh you remember? Yes I used to live in your territory, and now I’m nearby. I stand by what I said that night: I know what you did for people like us, that’s why I thanked you. Bruce can’t understand what it is to be poor and lost and to have to do bad things to survive. But I’ll make sure he does better with you.” you said “Just promise me to speak with Dick. Your brother looks like he is very eager to have you back in his life. He seemed very sorry you weren’t speaking with him earlier” you added
“I will try to talk with him again then. Thank you for… Thank you. I think I really needed to have this conversation with somebody but no one wanted to have it and I couldn’t really go to a therapist. You’re easy to talk with” he whispered, a little bit awkward
“I know” you smiled “I’m glad if I’ve been able to help”
“Is it your good action of the day to go to Heaven?” Jason joked 
“Absolutely” you giggled
A moment of comfortable silence engulfed the two of you. You both enjoyed your tea before you resumed talking:
“Hey you know what, this is my phone number. You can call or text me whenever you need it.” you offered
“Why?” Jason plunged his eyes onto yours. 
He was definitely not used of adults being there for him, especially without a catch
“Well I’m afraid I’m a family woman and my own family sucks very much. And since Bruce wants me around, I’d prefer it if I can get along with his people. I’d like to take care of you all.” you admitted, feeling a little shy to say all of this out loud.
Jason was also very easy to talk to.
“I don’t think I’m one of his people. Not anymore at least.” Jason sadly smiled at you
“You can be one of mine then. Take it as a repayment for allowing me to go back home every night without having to worry about anyone slicing my throat off” you insisted
“All the pleasure’s mine” he chuckled before saving your number onto his phone “You know, everyone says Bruce is nicer since you’re around. I have to admit this is true. Maybe happiness can truly change a man” 
“Even a bat?” you joked because Jason’s words were touching you a little more than you wanted to show it
“Even a bat” Jason nodded
A few days later, you received a message from Jason, clearly tasting the water with you.
J: Hey wanna go have some lunch together today or tomorrow?
You: Today sounds good :)
After this, you regularly had lunch together and Jason clearly started to see you as a motherly figure, and you saw him as a son. He crashed at your place more than once after patrol, so you could eat together. Bruce never commented on your relationship with Jason, but he heard you when you asked him to apologise.
Which he did.
Jason accepted it and tried his best with Dick and his other siblings. He was still feeling awkward around everyone, but he was slowly spending more time at the manor, even when Bruce was there. 
When Bruce asked if you wanted to meet all of his children anytime soon, you agreed but you instantly sent a message to Jason to make sure he would be there as well. He eagerly agreed because he couldn’t wait for you to be officially a member of the Batfamily.
--
PART 6
--
Taglist for all my work <3
@blublock404
@wind-canoe
@silverklaus
@couldeatthatgirlforlunch
Taglist for Bruce Wayne <3
@alishii
Taglist for this series <3
@Esposadomd
@moraxussy
@resident-cryptid
@legendarypiratecheesecake
@randomnamedmira
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sugar-crash · 2 days
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🍬King Candy (Wreck-It Ralph) x (gn) Reader👑
(Beginning Relationship Pt. II Edition!)
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(Just a tad bit different🔑 than it usually is, Have fun :))
- Tries his best to separate him from who he used to be to ward off suspicion of his shady behavior but as we can all see, he’s not exactly the best at it at times. Especially if you knew him when he was Turbo. Johunlz
- His more friendly King Candy look gives him far more leeway than he had as Turbo which he wanted purposely. He uses it to his advantage, especially when it comes to you, literally that one scene from Adventure Time. Shameless about it on top of that. ohcl
- Much like how he was previously, he teases you. But it’s far more lighthearted I guess? Sometimes he just says something absolutely mean as shit and then pats your head patronizingly in the same breath. Hate him. illu
- Being some of the shortest game characters of the bunch, he’s no stranger to being looked down upon, literally, and by then he doesn’t have much of an issue with his s/o being taller than him…
- However, if by some miracle or chance, you’re smaller than him, he thinks you’re so cute, affectionately calling you “snack-sized”, and he’ll say it when he tries to get on your nerves for one reason or another. thkl,
- Lovessss putting others down, when it comes to you, it’s more lighthearted or joking (with that little metaphorical bug in his ear relishing being able to do so), and anyone else??? Not as much. pu
- Lives for the praise you give him, as much as he doesn’t admit it of course, that self-satisfied and smug grin he gets whenever you congratulate him for having majority wins/being chosen the most as an avatar on Sugar Rush says it all. tvyl
- While being the one to establish the paywall and coin prizes (cause he’s an insidious asshole), he kinda hates that he can’t have an actual trophy like he used to— Can’t exactly display them for you to comment on later on considering they are constantly being used and turned into code. But hey, at least they have his insignia on them. aohu
- Calling myself out on this once more, but, the description randomalistic used for him in this YouTube video (which,,, I highly suggest watching if you haven’t already), specifically “a corrupt politician” is frighteningly accurate, he lies, he cheats, he sabotages, a perfect allegory for a corrupt higher power. vul
- And he fucking knows it man, proud of it even, one of his most successful works and he can’t even brag about it, can’t even tell you. wshjl
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- We really don’t see what his relationship is between him and the other racers besides Taffyta claiming he wants to keep them safe and uh… The race track scenes. So from what I can ascertain I can fully see him acting like Miss Hannigan from Annie, specifically this one scene (yeah this post is just chocked full of links, bear with me), the mental image of him mockingly saying “she had to go bathroom” with his lisp makes me weak.
- Even in his new and far more prestigious position as King he still longs for more, with his limits and disguises imperfections not helping this inner turmoil, even in a game as big as Sugar Rush boredom takes root and he even his excuses that explain why he stays in Sugar Rush to you have a nearly invisible air of uncertainty to them.
- Makes a point to make you feel good, loved, cared for all throughout your visits to Sugar Rush, nothing is too good for you, there’s always more.
- I think this kind of behavior stems from this deep seated desire to make sure you don’t leave him, you could have everything you want with his help— Why wouldn’t you stay? Please stay.
- Caged. That’s how he feels secretly, I mean, who wouldn’t? He wasn’t exactly coded to be a monarch, all these responsibilities, not even his coding skills could help him with that…. I mean, would he even be himself without it?
- Achievements, what are they for when it’s the same thing over and over again? Validation? Attention? Power?? You maybe? Things he’s been chasing after for all of his life, well— Not you but he’s realized that he’s become far too attached to you, your softness, your sensitivity.
- Each moment spent together is far more significant to him than what he thought it’d be when he first showed interest in you— Thinking it’d be like every other relationship (mostly platonic ones) he’s been in, fleeting, and ending with you hating him, you had every right to after all.
- Sickness, an insult that had been thrown his way over a dozen times to the point where it usually gets a scoff and furrowed brows, but it feels devastating when you say it after his true nature is unceremoniously revealed by his hubris.
- Abandoned— That familiar pang ripping through his newly mutated form as you struggle for your life alongside the others that stayed behind to help every last one of the Sugar Rush people to get to safety from the unruly swarm of Cy-Bugs eating their home into nothing.
- Red. That’s all he sees as he brutally beats Ralph down into a pulp and cruelly taunts everyone else as he holds the overgrown bad guy in the air, eagerly and sadistically waiting for a little girl to meet a brutal end only to meet his own.
(Almr sarqr dprk’s sll lk sar klqr)
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