#hate phone calls but I need to call the seller and check some stuff

[f1-ferraero]

I am maybe going to buy a new motorcycle. There's a model that I absolutely love and one is being sold now close to where I live and I am very seriously considering getting it.

Do I need it? No

Can I afford it? Technically yes but I shouldn't

Am I gonna do it anyway? Probably yeah

[rosietaeyongswife]

black orphan |l.ty

genre: angst, smut mafia!taeyong, taeyonxreader, mafia au

tw: mentions of dead, murders, bad language, sex, mafia, mafia stuff

summary: being daugther of people who are hierarchy..well known around south korea isn’t very nice especially when they’re mafia and you killed them. u know what also isn’t easy? taking care of your younger sister.

authors note: pls if you have time it would be nice if you could read this it’s about lately thing with chinese idols. i explain there why some people should stop spreading hate on them and that it’s not really their fault.

when you were child you didn’t understand what were your parents doing. you only knew you were rich. private schools. everything you want. most expensive clothes. everything. trip to hot country in middle of the winter? no problem. you and your sister minhee had everything. but your father and mother didn’t forget to teach you that you need to work for what you have.

  you were always amazed by your parents untill you were 16 years old and started to understand what they are doing for living. your parents were killers and drug sellers. you couldn’t belive it at first but with time you understood. that’s how your family is living. that’s how kim’s family is living. with time you learned about mafia life and your parents business. your father made sure that his daughter is going to take care of their business one day.. exactly - one day. one night your mother was standing in front of you with smile.

“y/n you are getting married.” she smiled wider. “he is son of rich man who can be needed.”

“what?”

 they wanted you to marry some 40 years old man and sell your younger sister because they would had only benefits. it was this time when it hits you.

 you are just 24 years old, are you really going to kill your parents? answer is yes. few weeks ago you poisoned your parents and made sure that everyone would think that their heart stopped. because of this you were now the owner of kim hierarchy. now you are boss. 

  you were sitting at conference room with jackson when someone called you.

“yes honey?” you smiled. “how much do you need? okay. take my credit card. yes it’s fine.”

 you hung up. it was minhee. she needed some money so you gave it to her.

“it was minhee right?”

“how do you know?”

“you always smile this way when you are talking with minhee.”

“damn jackson. you know me too well.” jackson chuckled. “so now. how is the deal with sagurako family?”

“i think they don’t want to pay us.”

 you could only smile.

“they really don’t take me seriously.” you sighed. “kill his son.”

“ok, how and when?”

“whatever. tell jaebum that it’s job for him.”

“yes sir.”

 you really weren’t in mood to games. you just want money and nothing else. is this that hard? pay what they own you? your parets exactly but they are dead so you should take money, right? they don’t matter same as their children. they have five kids so one less isn’t big deal. 

 when you were sitting by your desk you heard someone. it was yugyeom. you sighed and walked to the coridor.

“why the fuck are you so loud?”

“because bambam is stupid idiot.”

“what? no!” he shout. “he almost kill me.”

“whatever. be quiter.”

“y/n wait!” yugyeom looked in to your eyes. “someoe was following minhee when she was at school and then with her friends.”

 hearing this made you upset. you know that you have much more enemies than friends but you had hope that minhee isn’t going to be part of their hit list. 

“bambam take me home i need to talk with her.”

“what are you going to do?” yugyeom was looking at you confused. he knows very well that you don’t play games. “are you going to kill somebody again?”

“ew no. she is going to have home school. ask youngjae or mark to hire someone ok?”

“yes.”

 your sister safety is your priority. she didn’t do anything wrong and she is innocnt teen. you couldn’t let someone to hurt her or even worse. of course minhee knew that yours family works in dirty business but she doesn’t know much. and it should stay like this. minhee isn’t going to take your company one day. you can’t do it. if you won’t be dead to your 60s you would give company to your child or something but at this moment it isn’t time to think about this.

 the whole house was clean. junmyeon was here for sure. you smiled softly. take off your coat and boots. first thing you did was to drink some watter. drinking watter is important especially for your brain’s work. when you were done you went to find your sister.

“minhee!” you looked around your house but you didn’t hear her back. sighing you went to check her and you could hear she was talking with someone. “minhee!”

 you walked in and first thing you saw was her with phone.

“i’m sorry. didn’t hear you.”

“yeah, it’s okay. are you fine?”

“yes. everything is fine. something happend?”

“you not gonna attend school anymore. you will have home lessons. you know teacher will be here with you.” you shrugged.

“what? no way!”

“you can’t do anything about this.”

“you can’t lock me there! the fuck y/n! i have friends there.”

“they can come to house.”

“but no..wtf. i don’t want to.”

“it’s for your safety.” you tried to hug her. “i know it’s not cool and all but i don’t have any other choice.”

 minhee was looking at you with only hate in her eyes.

“are you trying to lock me down? just like parents did to you?”

“no, of course no! it’s not it.” you took package of ciggs. “i don’t want to see that you are dead. someone is following you. if you still be arguing you’ll be dead soon.”

“w-who is following me?”

“i don’t know. jackson hire some teacher and some bodyguards so i hope you’ll be safe here if no then i have to send you to china.”

“china?”

“yes to our uncle.”

“why the fuck i can’t live normal live.”

“listen. you can’t choose family but you should be grateful for us. for what you have. i work hard for everyting we achhived.”

“how? by killing people? it’s a job for you?” she smirked. “you are exactly like parents. what else do you do? drugs? murders? are you selling people?”

“done! i’m fuckin done. you can’t leave the house for next week. better accept how things are going because i’m not gonna let you talk to me like that.” you were pissed of. “you didn’t even know them well, what can you know? you acting like i don’t care about you even tho it’s not true.” 

 minhee didn’t feel bad about what she said. she was mad at you because she didn’t want to be in home. she wants to explore. you exactly know that she doesn’t want to live the way the whole your family is living. and you also don’t want her to live the same just like you. so sending her to china is the best option. uncle isn’t in mafia and all dirty stuff the rest of the family members do so minhee can be safe there.

  your sister didn’t talk with you by the whole week. you didn’t really care because you have so much work to do. kinda proud because you made japanese family to pay you the money they owned to your parents so you were satisfied. everything went fine. things are nice so are you. no worries by the whole time. only thing you are upset about is that your family want to meet. family meeting sounds nice? no. there is going to be other mafia because remember guys - if there is family meeting that means there is going to be make big deals.

 jackson with the rest of the boys were standing next to you. 

“you look pretty.” mark said looking at you with a smile. “but where is minhee?”

“told her that she has 5 minutes untill i go there.”

“yes sir.”

 you smiled. nothing can make your day worse. you are clever person so it turns out that you made a lot of big deals so now you are just swimming in the money to be honest. everything is so fine like never and nothing can upset you. not even this damn dinner with your family and others because you’ll be there with your people.

“minhee please we don’t have time. grandma will be mad.”

“i don’t care. i don’t want to.”

 you could only sighed. walking in her bedroom made you feel like teenager again. she was kind of similiar to you but at the same time she was so different. you took her hairbrush and started brushing her hair while looking in to her eyes in the mirror.

“you are so beautiful minhee. can you see it?” she nod. “everyones eyes are going to be on us. especially you because you are younger. behave there honey ok? they won’t like acting up or something. also be ready for all the compliments.” you smiled softly. “plus.. i can’t have eyes on you whole night so be careful. if someone is bothering you..” you lean to her ear “you know what to do.”

 she nodded and stand up. ready to go and show off. you are y/n and minhee kim. you are prestige family and nobody can tell otherwise. 

 the place was huge and expensive. you knew your family like things like that but not that much. without thinking your people with you at the front walked in welcomed by some people who were smilling at you.

“mrs.kim?”

“it’s me.”

“welcome madam. have fun.”

 slight smile goes on your lips and disaper quickly. and here you are. all eyes on you and your crew. smile and confident walk by you was really indimidiating. you knew your presence here was cherry on top. your parents died in mysterious conditions and here you are leading kim’s company. isn’t it suss? it is and you know it well but it’s only made you proud. your parents were problematic and were problem not only for you but for the family and co-workers. jelous eyes of wifes and girls were on you. to be honest, you are one of the prettiest and hottest woman there and that’s why you are just eye-catching. 

 the long table was place where you and minhee should stay. your people found place to themselfs, and when they were gone you noticed that by the table was sitting bosses of others organizations.

“good evening grandma.” you goes to hug her and asked minhee to do so. “i missed you so much.”

“is this my little y/n? sunshine i missed you. how are you?” she was worried. this woman was someone who you wish were your mother. she was the only one who cares about you. your mother or father never told you “i love you” it was your precious grandma who always was making sure to say “i love you” no matter what. “is everything fine?”

“i’m fine. everything is the best. business is going really well. you know.. zeros on bank account are only growing.” you smiled. “what about you? health?”

“i feel like i’m in my 30s.” she was only 70 years old but she felt way younger. “you know even tho your grandpa is pain in ass i’m fine. i’m so happy that now you are leading business.” she smirked. “my son and his -be sorry god- wife were failure. they have never made this much money like you do.”

“grandma thank you. it’s not such a big deal.”

“it is. i’m proud of you. i’m proud that you are leading something to be even bigger.” tear came down my cheek. “and you minhee. what about you?”

“everything is okay i guess.”

“is something bothering you?” everyone were looking at your sister and you knew what she is going to say.

“i feel kinda grounded but it’s okay.”

“what?”

“y/n made me stop attend private school and have home schooling.”

“it’s against your wish?”

“yes.”

 you were now kinda mad at your sister. you know well that she said that because she still doesn’t agree with idea of home schooling and china.

“let me make things clear grandma. someone was following her and i love her too much to let someone hurt her. it’s the safest in our home.”

 your grandma sighed like everyone else in family.

“minhee you are still too immature and too young to understand things. let your sister work and decide. she is doing everything for your best.” your grandpa said while he was drinking his wine.

“but i have friends there. i have thing i’m interested in school and now i’m going to be grounded.”

 you couldn’t listen her anymore what notice your another uncle.

“minhee just let things happen. can we talk about something else? as you can see we have guests by these table.” he looked around.

 and that was the time when minhee must leave. you looked at her and she disaper. anothers girls and boys who were teens also disaper leaving the elders and bosses.

“okay so let’s talk.” your grandpa said. “my son is such a dumbass and made debts. also. police was suspecting you to be the one who killed your parents my dear y/n.”

 boss of nct, bts and monstax looked at you. you just smiled at them.

“there is no proof. i made sure to done work.” you took your glass of wine. “i’m more pro than my parents was, right? i don’t think someone is crying because of their loss.”

 you interested taeyong. he has never seen a person who openly talk about murder. about parents murder. you were that cofident that it makes him like you. he could see clearly that you don’t fuck with others. 

“mother will you let her get away with this? he still was your son.”

“will you talk like that if you knew that he signed documents about taking over your wealth? and everyone else?” you took a sip.”seokhyun you are so fuckin dumb. i hope you know why i don’t have respect for you right?” you smirked “you are pain in as..you remind me of some boy who was bothering minhee. you know what did i do with him?” he shook his head no “i shot him in front of his parents eyes. be careful.”

“what else you know?” grandpa took another bottle of wine.

“i know so much that i could easily take over business of everyone here.” you smiled. “father hide money in japan. i guess no one knows why there but it doesn’t matter. i have deal for mr. lee taeyong.”

 taeyong smiled over you. he was glad that he is going to make deal with big mrs. kim y/n. 

“i listen to you lady.”

“i know your handsome and eye-catching member named yuta nakamoto is japanese and he runs your business there. let’s say i need him. i want your help with finding money in japan.”

“i want 40% from this.”

“you want too much. it’s almost half of the money i would get. it’s not worth it. you are only finding money that are basically belonging to me.”

 you weren’t dumb. you knew that it’s way too much.

“what is your proposition?”

“i can give you 20%.”

“deal. i’m glad i’m going to work with you mr. kim.”

“same here mrs.lee i hope you not gonna fail.” he smiled. “i want to also say something. time is ticking mr. seo. and you know what happend.”

 lee taeyong stod up and leave to his members table. you looked confused at wife of your cousin jongdae.

“what happend?”

“it’s matter between me and him. please don’t ask questions.”

“okay so i can begin now.” namjoon said slightly annoyed. “what with our collaboration mrs.kim.” he was looking annoyed at your grandma

“i said i don’t know.”

“please.. my boys were working for you. i think we would be giant.”

 you were looking at them and thinking. what the fuck. you knew that bts are doing good but you also heard about their debts.

“no. if my lovely grandma said no then it’s no.” you didn’t look at him but at your glass full of wine.”don’t you want collaboration with my grandma and granpa just to pay off your debts and bills?”

 everyone was looking at your table because everyone heard it. whole nct were looking at you with shock same with bts and bosses of other mafies were spechless same with shownu.

“aren’t you too mean? it’s none of your business y/n. it’s thing between me and your grandparents.”

“exactly. and i’m not going to look how you want to take their whole wealth. how much money do you need? we can borrow you but you know.” you stand up like namjoon did few seconds ago just to come closer. “deadline is short period of time. and consequences are really big.” you smiled. “ask chan what happend when he was late with money.”

 namjoon was standing there embarrased and paralaized. you come at him and he didn’t like it. but you weren’t afraid. you are at too strong position to be moved by little kim namjoon.

“okay. borrow me a three milion dollars and i’m going to return them back.”

“sure. jackson!” you said. “make collab with my grandma but remember that i have eyes all around and i will notice if there is less money than it should be. you have month to pay me back.” jackson give you both piece of paper when you signed it. “sign it.”

“thank you and yes. month and you will have your money back.”

 after this everything went smooth. no fights. just paceful event. by the time it was time to dance and you were asked by your cousin jongdae to dance but soon enough you were dancing with lee taeyong.

“i didn’t know you were that mean and that strong.” he said while his hands were on your waist and yours around his neck.

“i don’t like playing games with someone who isn’t worht it.”

“and i like it.” he smirked. “you seem to be good player aren’t you?”

“maybe i am. mr.taeyong why are you even here?” he was confused. “i clearly see that you and your men don’t want to be there.”

“are you watching us?”

“shouldn’t i?”

“i guess you should. it scary talking with girl who killed own parents.”

 you could only smile. you aren’t afraid of anything and no one will make you feel regret. your parents deserved this and if you wouldn’t kill them they would ruin your life and your family lifes. and y’all don’t deserve this at all. your parents were selfish since you’ve been child. when there was no minhee your only friend was maid and chef. they were talking with you and play with you and your toys just to not feel alone. beside of them you had your grandparents. your grandma loved you like you were her daughter. she always made sure to say “i love you” and to check on you. and your grandpa? he would be proud and happy to walk you to your kindergarten and take care of you along with your grandma. and your parents? they didn’t care. they just thougth about money. more money and even more money. your mother was mean if she had to stay with you. she would just left you in your bedroom with toys and goes to her friend or to watch tv. and father? he didn’t even talk with you. he started to talk when he wanted you to be part of mafia. 

he taught you everything you need to know. and because of their lack of love and your knowledge of things you shouldn’t know about you are like this today. cold and emotionless. no one really show your love (not including your grandparents). kids at shool were afraid of you becasue they knew who you were and their parents didn’t allow them to play with you. in high school they didn’t want to be in touch with girl whose family is gangsters and who could kill anyone they want. you even hadn’t any best friend. no one. 

“it’s not scary. they deserved this.” you were closer. “sometimes you need to get rid of your enemies and i’m sure they were one.”

“am i your enemy?”

“if you will help me you’ll be my friend.”

since then you haven’t talked with family members. you didn’t need to. also minhee was more distant than usually. you even noticed that she is leaving and coming back late at night. you just had hope that she isn’t causing any problems. but when she was gone for two days and came back like nothing happend it makes you feel mad. mark and youngjae were nice enough to follow her around and found out that she is dating someone. minhee was dating and you didn’t even know. also, it seems like they know each other really well and are together since the very long time. 

 you were fine with it. she is 18. she can date anyone. you didn’t even care about this that she doesn’t tell you but it’s okay. it’s hers life after all. but when she were gone for a week and she doesn’t contact with you.. boy, you were really mad. minhee just disapear and have no signs of live. 

“y/n you need to calm down. she for sure is fine.” mark said “she is teenager, something like this happens.”

“but i do so much for her, why she is like this?” bambam was looking at you with sad eyes. he knew he shouldn’t feel this way but he hates your sister and seeing you hurt was really.. bad feeling. he knew how much effort you put to raise her well and take good care of. “i don’t understand. she just could told me that she want to go somewhere or something. i’m sick of it.”

“y/n.. we got it. i think she could leave with her boyfriend. yugyeom is checking him.” jackson hugged you tightly. “she is fine. minhee is strong.”

“and naive. she doesn’t even know how to defend herself what if he is going to hurt her?”

“maybe no? we don’t know.”

 when you were sitting in your office you didn’t know back then that person who is lover of your sister is who he is. reading his info was really surprising to you. it was unbeliveble. member of nct. 

 sound of your heels could be hear in headquarter of nct. your usually outfit on you - dark coat and black boots above your knees. people called you black orphan because of the fact that you are orphan basically and because you only dressed in black.

 members of nct who noticced you were whispering something about black orphan being here. you were walking slowly don’t even bother to look at them. you had goal - find minhee. jackson and rest of the boys were behind you and were in the line. like always.

“excuse me, what are you doing here?” man named mark was in front of you. “i don’t remember that you were invited.”

“i don’t need invitation.” you growled. “better find kim minhee and park jisung.”

 face of mark knew that is going to happen and why are you here. taeyong and rest of the members of nct couldn’t belive that jisung is letting his girlfriend stay in their place. taeyong was against and mad because he found out by accident when he was checking bathroom and minhee was going to bathroom. he almost killed her.

 when mark was about to go your sister and her s/o were near. minhee was looking at you surprised. she knew you could find her but didn’t think that you would come to nct. 

“i count to 10 and we coming home.”

“i’m not leaving.” she hissed. “i’m sick of being under your control.”

“what is this noise here?” taeyong appeard in his hallway. the crowd of his people were looking around whole argument.

“you living with my money that i worked for. i pay your bills and all. i’m doing everything for you to have amazing life. why don’t you understand that you will never be normal girl? you will never. you will always be “daughter of mafia” or “sister who hate her parents”. you should accept this.”

“that’s why i fuckin hate you!” she scream. “i don’t want your help. you think you did everything well. i want to throw up everytime i reminds to myself what you are doing. i don’t want to be part of this also i don’t want to live in china. i want to decide.”

you laughed like freak. you were looking at your little sister and couldn’t think of anything but how stupid she actually is. 

“i’m not asking you.” you hissed. “you are ungretful, spoiled brat who thinks that owns the world and is main charcater, don’t you? if you want to be that independent okay. i’m going to block all back acounts from you. from now on you will work your ass off for money. i’m starting counting and you better come here.” you looked in to her eyes. “1..2..3..”

“you aren’t my mother. my mother is dead! understand this!”

 jaehyun was about to say something but taeyong stopped him. he was enjoying the show in front of him. he really loves how crazy you actually are.

“i’m staying with jisung. i won’t come back to home.”

“you are making disrace for our surname. don’t act like fool and come to home. i’m at 7.”

minhee didn’t even flinch.

“i’m not scared of you. after all i’m your family.”

“are you sure honey?” you touched her cheek. “do you know how killed your lovely parents?” she denied. “i did. funni isn’t it? everyone know but not their own daughter. i think you should be scared of me at that point.”

 minhee couldn’t belive her ears. you killed your parents. she was living with you not knowing about everything.

“you are crazy bitch! i hate you! i hate this family! one day i’ll make sure that police or media destroy you.”

“good luck.” you winked and slapped her. “you are no longer part of kims family. i don’t need you. you were the one that needed me.” you said harshly stepping closer and touched her chest to push her. “you are no one know. there is no coming back. you are done in my eyes. dead. and if i see you in my way i’m going to kill your love and then you. and guess what? nothing will bother to help find justice.” you shrugged and smiled one last time “you are free. make sure to change surname and to make it like we have never been family.”

 minhee was holidng her cheek and crying. at this point she knew that she doesn’t really know her own family. that there is secrets that are creepy and scary just like them. and she was sure she doesn’t want to involved. but now she was feeling bad because of what she said. jisung had tried hundred times explain her who you are. that she is doing it for her safety because thousands of people wants her head and she still didn’t listen.

 taeyong was following you.

“are you going to stop going after me or you want me to beat you up?”

“don’t need to be so harsh. i just want to ask you something.” he smiled. “have you ever been in love?”

“the fuck mr. lee? i only met you few times and i talk with you for the second time.”

“just answer me y/n.” his eyes was shining and you liked this view. you liked him to be honest. he did awesome work by finding your fathers money. he was loyal to you and you liked it. also he was handsome. why don’t like him?

“no. i have never been in love. having crush in daughter of mafia doesn’t sound nice right?”

“i don’t belive. you are way too pretty and too smart to be alone the whole time.” you smiled. he was cheesy but you liked it. “i think this can change.”

“do you want to seduce me?” you asked with little smile. “make me feel like i’m special and leave next day?”

“who said i would leave?” he smirked. “you are really something y/n.”

“i think we could talk about it.”

 and here you are. taeyong brings happines to your live. you have never experinced things like the one you do with taeyong. you are no longer alone. you wake up usually in his bed with his eyse piercing in to your soul. jackson and boys were happy that someone is interested in you and you are intrested in someone. they have never seen you having crush in male. but here you are. all over heels over lee taeyong. you didn’t like the idea of him having you wrapped around his finger but who cares? you like it.

“y/n what are you thinking about?”

“taeyong would you kill for me?”

“isn’t it obvious? i know you can do it by yourself but i would always kill anyone who is messing with my girl.”

“since when i’m your girl?”

“since the first time i’ve heard of you y/n.” he kissed you. “why you asking?”

“i feel like i spend way too much time with you so i need to make sure that you are worth it.”

“are you doubting me?” he touch your cheeks. “look at us. we are in my apartment in japan with beautiful view on sea. we are here alone having the best sex of our lives. having each other and telling silly secrets.” he hugged you and you lay your head on his chest. “we don’t need to stress about business. we have each other now. it’s feels like heaven.” 

“we are in japan. we are looking at the sea.” you smiled softly. “it’s almost like dream.”

“i know you have never thing like this. i want to show you life colors you know?” he smiled. “i want you to be happy. i want to see that you enjoy your time and let someone like you more than friend.”

“you just saying that.” you sighed. “you are going to leave soon like everyone in my life. but it’s okay.”

“you will never get rid of me.” he looked deadly in to your eyes. “past six months was like arcadia with you by my side. i feel like i can love you and i know that no one ever loved you the way i do.” he smiled. “but i’m here. i love you.”

“what?”

“you heard me and i’m not going to say this again.”

“lee taeyong you make me feel needed.”

 he was messing so much with your head and you didn’t even mind. he was there. he was with you and makes you forget about any problems. about stress. about work. time with him is smooth. and you love it.

“can we make love this time? not fuck? i want to feel your love even if it’s temporary.” you said with eyes closed while you kissed him

 taeyong smiled wide. he loved the idea of making love and not just fuck.

“my girl is soft.” he teased. “i want to do it. love.”

“i hate you so much sometimes.” you rolled your eyes. “i’m not going to ask anymore. it’s just this once.”

“alright. i got it.”

 you were sure that taeyong will disapear. you can’t show feeling but taeyong.. he show you love. he was there. you didn’t even know when you started to finding yourself making breakfasts for him. hugging him for every 5 minutes. telling him your dreams. listen to him and advice him. making him happy. it comes to you naturally just by watching his moves to you. it was so soft and so new to you. proudness. it what’s you feel. you could love taeyong. you didn’t even love your parents nor sister. it was more like obligation. but with taeyong? you realized your feeling when you were missing him and your mind just focus on him.

 you wanted to be best girlfriend to him. one time he even just put gun in your mouth and say to suck it if you love him just to then have you moaning “love yous”. and you did. not thinking twice. at this moment you both knew that it’s simply love between dificult people.

 taeyong was deep in you. you could feel him hitting right spots.

“how’s my kitten feeling?”

“good. good sir.” you moaned. “i feel like i’m close.” you whines

“i love view of you. you are perfect for me even your pussy is made for me.” he moeaned. “look at you under me. lovely.”

“stop talking and just make me cum.”

“marry me.”

 you were that confused. you were at edge of orgasm and he is telling you this.

“taeyong why are you saying this when we fuck?”

“why not? will you marry me?” he punted deeper and faster. “i would love to see you with my surname. lee y/n.” he smiled giving you hickeys “all by myself. my wife.”

“you got to be kidding me.” you laughed “we are having sex and you asking me about mar-”

 you couldn’t end your sentence because taeyong circled your clit and suddenly wave of pleasure hit you like ddu du and you cum. moaning his name and curling.

“answer kitten.”

“yes. i want to fuckin marry you lee dumbass taeyong.”

[pbandjesse]

I woke up last night because I was having stress about my credit card. I felt sick and I knew I had to ask my dad to help me figure something out.

He would text me in the morning. And first thing when I woke up I called him. And I cried. Because I feel so stuck. I pay more then I spend every month but because of some mistakes a few years ago the bill kept getting bigger. The interest got worse. And I had so many fees.

He talked me down and told me to start with looking into the fees. And it turned out I had been signed up for a protection plan on 2017, which makes sense because that is when all this mess started. But the woman on the phone was so nice and she canceled it right away and so at least the fees are gone.

We would figure the rest out later.

I got up and felt. Sad. A little better but the stress is still bad. And my skin was very red and dry. That's the worst part honestly. I hate feeling dry. I don't mind the red as much as you'd think. I know that is more alarming to other people but I've had it for so long it's hard to care. But the dryness makes me self conscious.

But I felt very cute besides that. I slept with my hair in a silk wrap last night and while it looked flat when I first took it out, with a little shaking it ended up fluffing out so cute. And I loved my outfit.

James made waffles and we hung out for a little while. I started cleaning the bathroom. The floors still need to be done. But it was something. And quicker then I thought it was time to go to West Elm.

This was a mixed bag. We got a little lost with parking. And then the parking coupon the manager had given us did not work. So we were already down a little when we started. But I had fun.

There wasn't a lot of foot traffic, I think if we were to do it again we would do it outside. But the place was very pretty. And we met some nice people.

We made two sales, of three bears. With one couple buying a large bear for a baby shower. And I was particularly excited because they took my card and they own a gallery and said they do pop up markets and are always looking for sellers. So I was really excited about that. And James got our new card reader working and that made the whole thing so much easier.

It was mostly just nice sitting together. I would work on some little bear paintings I'm going to make into stickers. I wished I brought my tablet to work on that part but making the little paintings was still a lot of fun and nice busy work.

I was telling James today it was funny that when I was in second grade I used to draw these same bears in every assignment I ever got. And Sarah ozwork made a comment about how I always did that and it just stuck to me. I was embarrassed a little that I did the same thing so much. But like. I'm doing it again. And I don't feel ashamed by that. It makes me happy. But it's funny how I have embraced tradition.

We would stay there until 3. My stomach hurt from being hungry and I was glad to go, I had a nice time but it was just not really our type of customer coming in. Ah well. Still a great networking opportunity.

I told the staff thank you, sent an email to the manager, and me and James packed up.

I ended up hitting my hip incredibly hard on the door handle on the way out. Hard enough I was sure I was bleeding. I checked when we got to the car but didn't see anything. But I just got changed and I have a huge horrible dark purple red bruise!! Omg.

But I only complained a little about how it hurt. Me and James would get out of there and go get groceries.

I tried very hard to not fall into every snack and nice package I saw. Only picking a couple things that weren't on the list. James always just writes "snacks" for me so I can pick things. But I would end up putting some stuff back and was proud of myself for that. Which is silly but I need to celebrate small victories.

We went home and unpacked. James did the multiple trips while I put groceries away and heated up frozen Mac and cheese. My hands were a bit shakey. I really needed to eat.

I would work on my sticker idea. I finished 3 I think!! They aren't perfect but I am still really happy with them for a first go. I want to try to have some things on the table that are under $5. And I think this is going to be a great pick.

I would lay in my hammock and call my dad soon after that. We talked and came up with a game plan. So I can slowly pay him rather then have the card keep getting interest and getting worse and worse. It's not just being given money, something I did not want. It feels like a hand up, a help. And I appreciate it so much. Because this has been giving me so much heart ache and stress. I just want to fix this.

Me and James would each paint out nails. I felt really low and so the little bit of self care was nice. And eventually we would come back together to finish "Our Flag Means Death" the pirate show we started last week. And it was just fabulous but man, that cliff hanger was very sad at the end. I really hope they make a second season soon. I don't need a million seasons, but it would be lovely to see more and what happens next. But until then there is already fan fiction a plenty.

It was later then normal but I got my shower and moisturized and am ready to wind down for sleep. I have an easy day tomorrow if my schedule is to be believed. I hope it doesn't get crazy changed last second like keeps happening. I don't blame anyone but it has happened a lot!

I hope you all have a good sleep tonight. Take care of each other. Goodnight!

[sammysdewysensitiveeyes]

"Hand me that loofah."

Keeping his face carefully averted, Pyro picked up the sponge, and tossed in Fabian’s general direction.

An angry “Watch it, you idiot!” indicated that the loofah had struck it’s intended target. Then there was a low chuckle.

“I get it. You’re a married man, after all. You can’t bear to look upon me, lest you completely lose your self-control. Don’t feel bad, you’re hardly the first.”

Pyro was, in fact, struggling not to lose his self-control, but was fighting the urge to vomit.

“You should have invited me to the wedding,” Fabian continued, accompanied by splashing sounds as he apparently flopped around in the tub. “Are we not friends?”

That sentence was technically true the way Fabian had phrased it.

“Yes,” Pyro responded simply.

“But I can understand that, too,” Fabian continued. “You didn’t want to be upstaged at your own nuptials, and my presence certainly would have captured all the attention.”

“Dominic and I thought you might be a bit too busy,” Pyro said, although the truth was less “thought” and more “hoped.” “We didn’t want to intrude on your valuable time.” He was absolutely going to relay this whole horrible conversation to Avalanche tonight over drinks, with a very exaggerated impression of Cortez.

“Well, I always make time for the little people!” Fabian exclaimed magnanimously. “Hand me that towel.” Water sloshed and Pyro was hit with a fine spray as Cortez stood up in the tub. At least it sounded like he was standing up, Pyro wasn’t going to look. He grabbed the nearest towel and thrust it blindly at the demanding voice.

A hand grabbed his wrist and yanked Pyro around, so that he was face to face with a dripping, naked Fabian Cortez, with soap suds sloughing off his glistening body. It was actually a very nice body, that was the worst part, with with a “package” that partially explained the man’s unearned confidence. But the smarmy, arrogant smile completely ruined the picture.

“Looking’s free, you know,” Fabian grinned.

Directing credit, Pyro thought fiercely to himself. Executive producer.

“Why don’t I give you some privacy to get dressed?” He said aloud, plastering a fake smile on his face. This would all be worth it when show’s profits started coming in, and then Pyro would get himself and Dominic matching His and His jet-skis.

He still wasn’t entirely sure how he wound up in this position. It had started with Shinobi pitching a reality show to the Council, which had somehow, inexiplicably, gotten a majority approval vote, possibly because Krakoa hadn’t been attacked in the last few weeks and the Council was bored. It was Survivor meets the Bachelor, in which groups of male and female mutants competed to win the hand of the handsome, debonair, and, most importantly, ridiculously wealthy Shinobi Shaw, through date nights and dinners and pointless jungle challenges of strength and skill.

Pyro had just made a few innocent comments, that was all. Just a couple of suggestions to Emma, who had wound up saddled with the bulk of the responsibility, about story arcs and pairings and how to arrange scenes for maximum drama and pathos. He understood that stuff, after all, as a romance novelist it was his bread and butter. (And he was a bit of a soap opera fanatic, but he wasn’t going to admit that freely.) Emma had listened with an eager, almost hungry glint in her eyes, and there had been a short conversation that had somehow ended with Pyro agreeing to serve as a writer, director and general creative supervisor, in exchange for a percentage of the profits and fairly massive salary. (Massive to Pyro, anyway, probably a drop in the bucket to Emma “Swimming in the money bin” Frost.)

And it actually had been kind of fun. “Reality” TV presented a unique challenge, in that he wasn’t allowed to directly tell the “performers” what to say, but he could do absolutely anything else to construct his creative vision. He could ask leading questions in the talking head interviews, edit scenes by splicing completely unrelated shots together, and put volatile contestants in a room with plenty of alcohol, then poke at them until they exploded.

Unfortunately, his duties had somehow gradually expanded to include talent-wrangling both on and off-set, which left him stuck making nice with Fabian Cortez, the most “colorful” (obnoxious) and, unfortunately, most popular, of all the contestants. Iceman would probably win the show as the nice, relatable, boy-next-door type, but Fabian was what kept viewers tuning in.

“Oh, that’s quite all right,” Fabian purred. He contorted his body as he toweled himself off, appearing to pose for nonexistant cameras. “I’m a generous man, I can spare you a bit of eye candy, even if our relationship must remain professional.”

“Yes, that would be best. Listen, we need you to do another challenge with Sienna Blaze.”

Fabian’s “generosity” quickly withered away.

“I will NOT get in front of a camera with that maniac! Such an uptight, ill-mannered, man-hating – well, I’m too much of a gentleman to use the word that she so richly deserves! She nearly killed me last time! Over a simple compliment!”

Yes, Pyro remembered it well. Fabian’s near barbeque had garnered record-high ratings. And hopefully tossing them into a mud-pit together in bathing suits would produce similarly explosive results.

“Oh yes, I know, Fabian,” Pyro cooed, hating himself a little. “She’s very difficult, and you’ve been such a professional about it.” He pulled up comforting mental images as he spoke. Jet-skis. Wagyu steak. Insanely expensive whiskey. Him and Dominic having a long honeymoon in Bali, Sydney, Seoul and Tokyo. All those zeros at the end of the check that Emma had given him.

“Well, a professional shouldn’t have to put up with this kind of shabby treatment!” Fabian said haughtily. He was finally wrapping the towel around his waist, to Pyro’s great relief. “I asked for Norwegian strawberries in my dressing room, and that idiot assistant brought me French!”

“I’ll look into it,” Pyro assured him, fully intending to send Fabian the exact same strawberries (which were, in fact, grown on Krakoa) with his apologies and a fake Norweigian label.

He had a vague notion in the back of his head that Emma should be handling this, Emma was supposed to be in charge! And yet she’d gradually eased the responsibility into Pyro’s arms, only sashaying onto set once every few weeks for a “status report,” and spending the rest of the time off performing mysterious and supposedly very important duties for the Hellfire Trading Company and the Council. She never picked up her phone or responded to voice mails.

It was okay, though. Pyro could handle this. He was a damn writer, and he was good at it, and he would poke and prod his stars through the storyline he had planned, because he was absolutely brilliant. Even Emma had said so.

“Anyway, don’t worry about Blaze,” Pyro insisted, his voice dripping with sticky-sweet honey. “We’ve given her a talking to about her behavior.” He had done no such thing. “I’m sure she’ll be much nicer to work with. In fact, we think the audience will really enjoy you putting her in her place. Really demonstrate your masculine superiority.” Was that too much? They couldn’t have Fabian dying on camera, after all, even though it would be hilarious.

“Well, I should hope so!” Fabian said, rubbing lotion carefully across his pecs. “I’m obviously carrying this entire show, and I will be treated with the respect I deserve.”

“You know,” Pyro added slyly, “I think she’s actually got a bit of a crush on you. You know how some women are.” No, this was definitely too much. Oh well, they could edit around Fabian’s inevitable death and resurrection, and in the mean time they’d get some amazing footage.

“Oh, of course,” Fabian said, with a leering understanding creeping across his face. “I suspected from the very beginning. She couldn’t handle my raw sensuality.”

“Who can, really?” Pyro hated this, he really hated every second of having to pull on the polite mask of social niceties and insincere compliments. It always seemed almost obscene. May as well just flip the other fellow over and start tongueing his arsehole, right? Except that was actually fun in the right circumstances.

But he’d done it before, as a journalist dealing with self-important sources, as a novelist schmoozing with publishers and book sellers. He could do it now, for the astronomical salary that Emma was paying him, and for the Prime Time Emmy Award for Outstanding Competition Program that was hovering in his sights. Emma had assured him that it was a strong possibility. Just imagine rubbing that in the faces of all the critics who had called him a talentless hack! They’d say…well, they’d probably say that an Emmy for trashy reality TV was the highest possible honor for a hack like him, but Pyro wouldn’t give a fuck, because he’d have an Emmy and they wouldn’t.

“C’mon, then, we’ll give you a quick touch-up with bronzer. We’re shooting the scene in fifteen minutes.” Pyro began to guide Fabian, still clad in only a towel, towards the bathroom door.

“We’ll shoot the scene when I’m ready, and not a second before!” Fabian insisted. It would probably be another hour of Fabian demanding and sending back expensive snacks before they could even get him to the set. Luckily, they were actually scheduled to shoot the scene in two hours.

“Yes, of course, whatever you want,” Pyro wheedled, imagining the satisfying explosion of flesh and blood that would very likely occur when Fabian and Sienna Blaze came into contact. And Fabian was going to do it, that much was clear now. “I know you’ll do a fantastic job. You’re brilliant you know, absolutely brilliant……”

For a moment, Pyro trailed off as a crack opened in his mental wall, and memories slipped out into the light. Emma pouring more wine into his glass during their monthly meetings, assuring him again and again that he was absolutely brilliant, a true artist, that the show would thrive in his capable hands.

“No, that’s completely different,” Pyro muttered to himself, shaking his head.

“What was that?” Fabian twisted around, the towel slipping dangerously low on his hips.

“Oh, nothing,” Pyro exclaimed brightly, slamming the mental wall shut again. “Now, let’s get you into make-up, ya big handsome star!”

[j-elaine-hyde]

The Bean Chronicles - Post Bean Part 6

Henry Cavill / Reader / Chris Evans

You stood in the doorway of the guest bedroom staring at the stacks of boxes. Saying you were overwhelmed was an understatement. Thankfully Ashley would be by shortly to bring you some essentials and help you start looking for a new place to live. Despite Henry’s best protests you had been adamant about getting your own place. It didn’t sit right with you to move into his house straight out of Chris’s.

You grabbed a small box from the nearest stack and set it on the floor. Kneeling over it, you cut the tape and folded back the flaps. There on top of the other contents sat the smashed framed copy of the Boston Globe. The glass obviously shattered by a fist. You dropped it back in the box as you sat back. You started to cry as you moved away from the box, hugging the wall.

That’s exactly how Ash found you moments later. With one look at the box, she already knew what had happened.

“I’m so sorry. Are you ok? Let’s go to the living room. I’ll get into those later. You don’t need to do that.” She helped you off of the floor, and led you to the sofa. “Where’s Henry?”

You sat dazed, still calming down. “He flew out earlier, he’ll be back in a couple of days....” you said without even blinking.

Ash sat next to you, concern written across her face, unsure of what to say.

“Did I get a letter from Henry?” Your eyes shifted, burning into her. You calmly waited for an answer.

Her head dropped and her shoulders slumped. “Yes. You had just met Chris. You were so excited about him and so crushed about Henry that I didn’t want it to upset you.”

You wanted to scream. You felt hot, your fists balled. “You had no right to keep that from me!”

“I know. I’m sorry. But things went so well with Chris that I never thought it’d matter. And by the time you did find out about it, you’d be happy that’s what I did.”

You sat there glaring at her. Unsure of what to say. You could see it on her face she regretted it and honestly felt she was just trying to protect you, but what would have happened had she just given you the letter?

“Where is it?” Unmoved you asked flatly, trying to remain calm.

“It’s gotta be in those boxes. It was with my office stuff.”

“Well I’m not unpacking those until we move. So let’s just find a new place.”

She looked at you with wide eyes, waiting for more. When it didn’t come she reached into her bag and grabbed her iPad.

You were going through an email from your real estate agent looking at houses when your phone rang, Henry’s handsome face filling the screen.

“Hello love... how are you doing?” His deep smooth voice spread a happy, calm feeling that washed over you.

“Hi... I’m ok. How are you?” You spoke softly.

“Wishing I was there with you. I miss you. I hate that I have to be gone. But Kal will take care of you and it’s only a couple of days.”

“Same. But it’s ok. He’s been an excellent snuggle buddy. Ash is here. We’re looking at houses.”

“I wish you weren’t darling... I wish you’d just stay with me. What can I do to convince you?”

“Hen... we talked about this...” you slumped down sinking further into the sofa.

“I know... but I was hoping you’d change your mind...” you could hear the sadness in his voice. “I just want you with me.”

“How’s work going? Was your flight ok?” You changed the subject and tried to sound cheery.

“Yea yea... it’s fine. Flight was good. Miss your gorgeous face... give Kal kisses for me. I’ve gotta go, but I’ll call you tonight.”

“Ok sweets... have a good meeting. Muah.” Your kissing sound elicited one from Henry that made your heart swell.

“Talk to you later my love.”

Ashley watched as you hung up your phone, getting back to scrolling through houses.

“Why don’t you just stay here with him?”

“Not you too...”

“I’ll tell you what. Let’s go look at some houses, and maybe if you find the right one y’all can move into it together?”

You jerked your head around to look at her, “Did Henry get to you? How much is he paying you? You hate him.... why are you all of a sudden on his side?”

“He’s not paying me. I don’t hate him. I hated him when I thought he blew you off. I felt horrible when I read the letter. And I was terrified he was going to ruin what you had. But if after everything you’ve been through, he’s the one you still want.... then maybe you should trust that.” Every once in a while she said something insightful and it always surprised you.

“Alright, let the agent know what we want and we’ll go look.”

“Our appointment is at 1:00. I kind of already made that plan. I know you’re mad at me, but I’m still your best friend, I still have your best interest at heart, and I still know you better than you know yourself.”

You laughed and shook your head, knowing she was right.

-

After four houses you had found THE ONE. It was one of the more well known houses in the hills, but considering you were starting your life with your Prince Charming, a castle seemed appropriate.

Convinced your decision should be a surprise and a grand romantic gesture, you decided to pull the trigger and buy it. What’s $9 million for a fresh start?

Your agent handled everything and you were in escrow by the end of the day. Thankfully the sellers were already in their new home and the stager would only need a day or two to empty the house.

-

Three days later Henry arrived home. A day later than planned, but if fit in perfectly with your grand scheme.

You were eating lunch at Henry’s favorite little hole in the wall joint, almost wiggling in your seat you were so excited.

“What gives my love? You’ve hardly eaten and you can’t sit still. What’s up?” He smiled as he ate.

“I have a surprise...”

His face lit up and his eyebrows raised, “Oh do you?” He grinned, locking eyes with you. Your excitement, contagious.

“Yup... after lunch, I’m driving.”

He narrowed his eyes at you, smirking a sexy smile as he slid the keys across the table to you. “Fine.... whatever you say darling. Anything that makes you this giddy, has got to be good. Anything to make my girl happy.”

-

You pulled up to the gate and entered the code. You had made Henry lay down with a blindfold on, so he wouldn’t have a clue. You parked the car and walked around. You kissed his smiling lips as you took his hand, helping him out of the car.

“Ok.... you can take off the blindfold.”

He pulled it off and stared at the castle before him.

Clapping your hands together you grinned, “A castle fit for a King. My King. Whatcha think?”

He shuffled forward and wrapped his arms around you and kissed you. “I thought you were going to say you were staying with me....” he seemed slightly bummed out.

“Hen... Sweetie... I bought this place in hopes you’d move here with me and we could work on a happily ever after of our own, in our very own castle. A fresh start for both of us.”

His face changed immediately, “You what?! You-“ he looked back at the house with a shocked look on his face. “Darling... are you serious?”

“Yup.” You held up the keys with a grin as he clutched your face in his hands and kissed you before picking you up and swinging you around.

“You’re amazing my love. Let’s go check it out!” He carried you to the door, holding out his hand for the key, before opening the door and carrying you inside. He set you down as he closed the door.

“I figured we could just stay at your place while we work with the designer to fill it full of stuff and then we’ll move in. You and me... and Kal.”

“Are you sure this is what you want? Am I what you want, who you want to be with? Are you sure?”

“The moment I saw this place I knew I wanted to live here happily ever after with my Prince Charming.”

He grinned and squeezed your hand. “Show me around My Queen. Give me the tour.”

-

You were standing in the master bedroom staring out at the view when Henry came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, placing a sweet kiss on your neck, “I love it Darling.”

You spun around facing him, “Do you really? You aren’t mad?”

“Mad?! Mad about you maybe. This is an incredible house, and what man could say no to his Queen’s dream?!”

You were so excited you lunged, wrapping your arms and legs around him as he caught you.

“I’m happy you’re not mad and you love it as much as I do.”

He shook his head in disbelief that you could ever think he’d be mad. “I would live in a box with you my love.”

A smile from him was all it took. You kissed his handsome face and full lips passionately. It was only a moment later he pulled back and looked at you, flashing his eyes as his fingers slid your panties to the side, massaging you as he turned and pressed your back against the wall.

You could feel him undoing his pants before he adjusted, stretching you as he entered. “Every time.” He shook his head as he made quick work kissing your neck before parting your lips with his tongue.

Your body responded to his without hesitation, you could feel the hot rush of climax building deep inside of you. You wrapped your arms tightly around him, as he whispered in your ear, “I love you.”

His gruff voice sent you over the edge, your entire body clenching tightly around him drawing out his climax. He collapsed against you, the pressure enveloping you making the world melt away entirely.

-

You walked out of the house holding hands, smiles on your faces. Your afterglow was quickly shattered by the sound of clicking shutters. You glanced up and saw them lined up shoulder to shoulder at the gate. You ran and climbed into the car.

“How did they find out??” You were obviously upset.

“I’m guessing your real estate agent? Or Ashley...” Henry grimaced as he started the car. As the gates opened the photographers backed off, still clicking away.

Henry sped off, racing back to his house. Ashley’s car was still in the driveway.

“Hey Ash... you didn’t tip off the paps... did you? About the new house.... because we were just there and we were surrounded.”

“No... and I don’t know anyone else who knows you bought that place....” she sat there at her desk, looking you straight in the face. “The agent wouldn’t have said anything. She signed an NDA.”

Henry walked into the room, “Darling... does Chris still have your location on his phone?”

You slowly turned around to face him as your eyes got wide. “Yea I think so...”

“I’m gonna say it’s a safe bet that he’s probably the one that did it. He doesn’t have to spy on you if the paparazzi does it for him.”

Ash chimed in, “He’s not wrong Y/n...”

You walked over to the desk as the iPad started dinging. Tabloid alerts for your name started popping up, one right after the next.

“It’s everywhere.” You sighed.

[melissagt]

Where did I go?

So a friend on FB asked how I was doing and instead of typing everything over again, I figured I would just copy/paste it here too...in case anybody was wondering where I’ve been...

I have ups and downs. I got laid off a couple weeks ago...my last day of work is October 7th. It's been hard. I knew the company is going through changes, that’s public knowledge, but I thought I was safe because I've been there for 14 years and I'm one of the top of my team in terms of performance. I’ve always been the one with the sun shining out of her ass (sorry for the image, but that’s the way I’ve always been treated at work). Which means I made more money than my team mates. That was the deciding factor. That’s what put the target on my back. I was just a number. Who would have thought being a high performing player would have actually screwed me over in the end? 

Anyways...I get 22 weeks of severance (it comes as one lump payment, so yay taxes up the wazoo) so I can pay off all my debt when I start on unemployment. My resume is out there on Indeed and LinkedIn etc etc. Multiple people have given it the thumbs up. But...I haven't had luck finding any comparable jobs. Oh, they’re out there...I just can’t get them. Not now. I thought I was skilled, but it feels like my 14 years have meant nothing. The way the US is right now with jobs, it's a seller's market...meaning recruiters can ask for the moon and always find higher-skilled people tripping over themselves for jobs beneath them. So while I'm trying to post for a lateral position, in reality I'm going to end up having to start over again in a call center taking calls. Because while I'm experienced, there are people way more experienced than I am clamoring for the same jobs...who under normal circumstances, wouldn’t even be competing with me because they'd be my boss or even my boss’s boss. But because of The Cheeto™ and his (mis)management of COVID (along with everything else he’s done), we're all fighting with each other over scraps...and it’s only going to get worse...

I'm going to take a breath...realize that I'll be okay while I'm on unemployment...hope that gets extended past the state base of 26 weeks, and concentrate on my artwork. My dream is to make money with my art...I don't need to make as much as I do/did...enough to live ok and I'd be happy. I know other people have taken this kind of adversity and gotten the opportunity to do what they love. I just hope I can be so lucky. 

And if all else fails, there's a myriad of entry-level call center gigs out there...I have an insurance call center background, but whether it's a bank or insurance or whatever...a call center is a call center. In fact, while I don’t relish the idea of being chained to a phone again (believe me, call center work is brutal), it would be refreshing to have a job I can actually put down at night and take a vacation from (I literally have not taken a full day off this entire year because I have no backup...so even on days off I’m still logging in for at least an hour and half to do essentials...because that’s the way I roll...yada yada about the sun shining from places as mentioned above). But good lord I would love if I could somehow find a way to make ends meet with artwork. My husband is still working (for the same company that axed me...and we're keeping our fingers crossed he doesn't get the boot).

But the worst part is that I get that the company needs to make changes...but I had to learn the hard way that all they care about is their image. They said they would do everything they could to avoid involuntary separations...that they would redeploy staff to avoid it and even upskill where necessary. But those were just words to make themselves look good. They're not doing any of that. I didn't get a thank you or a we're sorry or anything. Just "buh-bye". I tried applying for a position in my same department that would literally be the next natural step in career progression for me and I got turned down today because it's a seller's market for jobs and they can ask for completely ridiculous pedigrees when last year I would have been more than qualified. (Hell, my boss, who was also laid off on the same day, by the way...was even grooming me for that same mother-fucking position as part of my career development.) And even worse...I have to train the rest of the people on my team, the ones who stayed with the pack and are safe, on how to do my job after I'm gone. If it wasn't for the severance check in two weeks, I'd have told them (the company) to take the eternal bird and stuff it. I don’t hold it against my team at all...I will miss them and I hope to keep in contact with a good number of them...but good fucking god do I have things I want to say but can’t say about that company.

And please no comments about how America sucks. Yes, it sucks. I fear/hate/loathe the direction the country is going. I don’t want to live here anymore. But it’s not like I can just uproot my life and go someplace else. So here I am. In America. In Connecticut, one of the most expensive states in the country to live in. That is my life. My family is here. My husband’s family is here. So here we stay...and here I vote. 

But that’s what’s going on in my life. Right now the Excedrin Migraine is finally starting to kick in to help take away some of the pressure in my skull from crying earlier. Sorry to be such a downer. It seems like everybody is down these days. 2020 is the worst year of my life. The worst year of a lot of people’s lives, I’d imagine. But somehow, we’ll make it through. 

[looselucy]

The Only Living Boy in New York

June 14th – Harry’s POV I awoke from a restless sleep, my eyes uneasily meeting another murky morning in New York, my entire body burdened with a brazen ache. It was clear that misery loved company from the way that it clung at my side, dug its claws into my skin. I was exhausted.

In recent months, I’d gotten into the habit of instinctively turning to gage of the other side of the bed, and even though I’d been in New York for almost three weeks, and I hadn’t shared a bed with her for over a month, I still hadn’t managed to break the habit of turning to see Alfie every single morning. Coming to my senses and finding my bed empty didn’t seem to be getting any easier. Already exasperated, I turned again and reached for my phone which lay on top of my bedside cabinet to check the time, disappointed to have once again stirred at such an early hour. “For fuck sake.” I huffed, craving more sleep. I had to literally drag myself out of bed and into my bathroom, my eyes barely open as I leaned and turned on the taps to fill up the bath, leaving the water running and heading to the living area of my apartment, coffee feeling essential. I wasn’t sure why I’d ever thought that being in New York would make anything better, because it never had. All I’d known for sure was that I wanted to get out of Rosebury, start afresh, try to put that phase of my life behind me, and New York felt like the only real option I had, somewhere with enough distance but somewhere I was familiar with. I’d really thought that I would feel better once I was there, once I was settled. I didn’t. As I filled up the kettle with water, a loud buzzing noise interrupted me, someone ringing my buzzer from the street downstairs. I frowned at the idea of company, not just because I didn’t desire it but because of its unfamiliarity. I headed towards the door, pressed the button to speak between systems. “Hello?” I groaned. “It’s Liam, buzz me in.” I did as I was told, not saying another word before I pressed the button to open the door and allow him into the building where I lived. Liam was my agent. He’d been my agent for years. Liam spoke directly with galleries and clients and buyers and he was the reason my art had done as well as it had. He was alarmingly good at his job, meaning the work of a young boy just out of university had been seen as something truly special. I so easily could have been dismissed at such a young age with such little experience, but Liam had managed to make my name for me, make sure I could live a life that was far more than comfortable. When I so easily could have been shunned, Liam made it so that I was respected. I had a lot to thank him for. It took him some time to reach me due to the fact that I lived on the top floor of my building, overlooking Central Park, a few doors down from the studio I had for my art; somewhere to feel creative and somewhere I’d open up and use as a public gallery, occasionally. I’d told Liam I was back in New York around a week earlier, but he lived in the UK most of the time. I’d known it wouldn’t have been too long before he showed up, got me back into painting and selling. It was inevitable. I made us both a coffee and turned off the running water for my bath, and by the time he got there and knocked on my door, I actually felt quite good about seeing him again. It was nice to see someone I knew, a face that felt friendly and welcomed. It had been too long. “Morning!” He greeted cheerily when I opened the door. “You’re up early.” “I had an early flight. Slept all the way here. How’s things?” “Uh… Fine, yeah. Everything’s fine.” He looked as composed and well-dressed as he always did when I saw him. I’d never seen him wearing anything other than a suit; always different, always perfectly fitted and pristine. It didn’t make sense to me that he’d just gotten off an eight-hour flight, but Liam had this certain quality about him, this poise, something that assisted with his selling techniques. He was always professional. “Sure?” “Yeah. Yeah, fine. I uh- I made you a coffee. How are you?” “I’m good, cheers. Glad to see you. Glad to have you back in New York.” “Mm.” I tried my best to sound even slightly enthusiastic, but it didn’t play. I wasn’t happy there. And I was beginning to worry that I wouldn’t ever feel happy anywhere. “To be honest, I wasn’t expecting you to move back here.” “No?” I grumbled after taking a hefty sip. “No, I mean… The last time I spoke to you properly, you seemed really settled. Happy. You were in the countryside somewhere, right?” “Yeah. Up North, a place called Rosebury.” “What changed? I mean that was… a couple of months ago?” I didn’t know what to say. I liked Liam, and he’d been in my life for a long time, but we weren’t close. We were barely friends, really. He didn’t feel like someone I could share with, not that sharing ever came easily for me. I couldn’t begin to explain how my feelings had altered since I’d spoken to him on the phone that day, mere hours before my brother broke into my home. “It was… It was just time to move on.” I sighed, not willing to discuss it. “Since you’re here… we should talk work. M’gunna start painting again, sell some new stuff.” “And the Blood Sun?” He asked. I went quiet for a while, staring at him as I thought about that painting, thought about what I wanted, how it made me feel. “I… I wanna focus on new stuff right now. I can’t even think about the Blood Sun at the minute, because… The thing is, I don’t wanna paint with blood anymore.” The look on his face after I’d said that was proof that our relationship, however friendly, was strictly business. He seemed shocked, maybe even disappointed by me saying I no longer wanted to paint with blood. It was my niche, it was what had gotten people so interested in my work, a large reasoning behind why my stuff sold for as much as it did. Liam was thinking business, and me not using blood had the potential to drive down prices, which meant he earnt less. As understandable as it was, I couldn’t help but wish for more. I thought about Alfie, how she had only cared about me, my health, what using blood was doing to me and how vital it was that I stopped, found a different way of expressing my feelings through my art. She didn’t look at it as an expression, she saw it as me hurting myself and nothing more. I’d finally started to see it the same way. “Right. Okay… Shit.” He sat himself down on the stool beside him. “Are you sure? It’s a major selling point.” “One that involves… self-harm, to put it bluntly. I don’t wanna do it anymore. I can’t.” “Okay, yeah. Well… I mean, since you’ve had a break, maybe we present it as like… a new era.” He spoke his thoughts as they came to his head. “Maybe… think of something new. A new style. A new addition. Something almost to… replace the blood, y’know?” “Right. Okay, yeah.” “Different styles, different techniques. A new method. Let’s keep people interested, that’s the main thing.” “Agreed. M’glad you… get it. M’glad you understand.” “As long as you can think up something new. You got any ideas?” “Uh… Not really. I dunno, I guess I’ve… not been in that much of a creative headspace recently.” When I’d moved to Rosebury, I’d made a purposeful and conscious decision not to paint, pulling myself out of that mindset in order to save my sanity, hoping to heal. Despite a minor setback when I’d gone to New York at the end of February, the only other time I’d allowed myself to paint was when I was with Alfie, which was carefree, fun, something I didn’t really need to think about. She helped to make something that once made me miserable into something that felt good, for the first time in years. It was hard to feel creative without immediately linking that with pain. It was hard to think about Alfie without immediately linking her with pain. “Well, that’s one of the reasons I’m here, actually.” He got back to his feet, walking around the kitchen counter and approaching me, routing through his pocket. “Y’know James Caine?” “Uh… I dunno, I don’t think so.” “He’s an artist, he lives locally. Recently moved here from Manchester. He’s good. He’s talented. I work with him and he wants to meet you.” He handed me over a rather tattered piece of paper with an address scribbled onto it, my brows low as I took it from his hand before looking back up to him. “Why?” “Because you’re Harry fucking Styles.” He leered. “He likes your stuff. He wants to talk art, work, what it’s like here, how to build his name up. He’s having a party tonight, and he asked me if I could get you to go.” “M'not really… in a party mood.” “I wouldn’t expect anything too wild. Bunch’a creative types, artists, sellers, y’know.” “Mm.” If anything, that put me off even more. When I’d last been in New York fulltime, my whole life seemed to centre around events like that and I’d always hated them. There was such a lack of honesty in those rooms and within those people, too many pretences and false personalities that people created as though they thought it would suit their career, forcing who they thought they should be. People were pretentious and arrogant and self-obsessed, and it was always something I’d hated about my job and the little quirks that accompanied it. “You should go. I think it’d be good for you. Get talking about art with some interesting people, you’ll think up something for your new work in no time, I promise.” “Fine.” I sighed despondently, placing the paper down on the counter. “I probably won’t stay, but I’ll go for a while. See if it helps.” “Good choice. Right, I’ll see you there then! I’ve gotta go, I’m meeting some people. Gotta cram in as much work as possible whilst I’m here.” “How long are you here for?” I asked as I approached my sofa, resting against the back of it and folding my arms. “Couple of weeks, then back to London.” “Well… I’ll try and think something up before you go.” “Nice one.” He nodded. “Alright, I’ll see you tonight.” He was seconds away from leaving, opening the door before I managed to spit out my question, nervous and ridden with fear. “Do you know any therapists?” I rushed, speaking so quickly that what I’d said was unclear to him. “What?” He turned around to face me. “Do you… Do you know of any therapists?” I paced myself, my throat feeling swollen, almost choking over the words. “You wanna see a therapist?” He asked. “Yeah. I think… Yeah. I-I thought I remembered you saying you once saw someone, but-” “I did, but not here. It was back in the UK, a long time ago. I saw a woman called Dr Jackson for… almost two years.” “Did it help?” Whenever the mere thought of therapy had introduced itself to my mind before, I’d completely shunned it. I’d been dubious about how talking was supposed to help in some way, it hadn’t made sense to me. Talking had never felt like any sort of solution, but somehow, over time, Alfie had changed that. She encouraged me, supported me, helped me to articulate times of my life that I hadn’t been able to communicate efficiently, things I had never really spoken about. She made me realise that talking really did have the power to help, the power to change things in a positive way. I didn’t want my past to keep holding me back in the way it was. She’d helped me more than I could even begin to understand, but it hadn’t been enough. I could tell by my recent actions and feelings that it wasn’t enough. I knew something wasn’t right, and I so badly wanted to fix it in any way I could. “She really helped me, yeah. She was amazing.” Liam said. I wanted that. Needed it. As wonderful as she’d been, Alfie was not a therapist. There was only so much she could do. There was only so much I had allowed her to do. My emotions had been undistinguishable for quite some time, not at all limited to but largely surrounding how I was feeling about Alfie. I missed her so much. I was sure I’d done the right thing, but it didn’t make it any easier. I was just so sure that in the long run, I wouldn’t be any good for her. I didn’t want her to love me, because I was completely convinced that I was a bad omen, that I’d ruin it and hurt her and it would break the two of us more than it already had. I was not in the right position to give her everything she deserved. I wasn’t the right person to do that, no matter how much I wanted to be. Trying to explain that to her didn’t really feel like an option, because she’d have fought it. She would have fought for me and us and it would have hurt so much more than it already did. Being without her was killing me but it had to be that way. Jack was right. It was better to get out, save myself from as much pain as I possibly could. So once again, I’d chosen against talking, because I couldn’t. It was like my body was physically fighting any attempt I could make to tell her exactly how I was feeling. Instead of talking, explaining myself, I’d been blunt and hurtful and I’d lied, because I thought it would be easier for her. In a way, I wanted to give her a reason to hate me, to be angry and frustrated, anything to stop her from loving me. Anything to make it easier for her. We weren’t right for each other. Or at least, I wasn’t right for her. She had brought so much light into my life that I’d began to fear the dark, dread how things would be without her, and I was right to. I couldn’t stand the thought of her just waking up one day and realising she’d be better off without me. I felt too vulnerable. No one I’d ever cared for that much had stayed in my life. How could I expect her to be any different? I put the power back into my own hands thinking that would help, but the longer we were apart, it seemed my theory wasn’t panning out. I had no idea what might help me to heal, but seeing a therapist felt like a good place to start. “I’m sure there’ll be a lot of good therapists here.” Liam continued, covering my contemplative silence. “Just look around. Don’t think that… the highest price means the best therapy, because it doesn’t. You can sit across from some people and realise instantly that they see you as a job. Find someone who cares. Find someone who honestly wants to help, not someone who sees you as work. Yeah?” “Thanks.” “Don’t mention it. See you tonight.” “Yeah.” With a smile, he finally left my apartment, leaving me on my own with my thoughts once again. I practically downed the rest of my coffee before heading back through my bedroom and into the bathroom, filling up the bath the rest of the way before undressing, testing the waters, messing with my phone to play music through the speakers I had installed around the flat, and then finally climbing in. I became accustom to the heat quickly, steam rising around me as I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath in before submerging myself completely, imagining myself in the lake just outside of Rosebury. The sound of The Only Living Boy in New York playing became distant, unclear, somewhere between soothing and utterly unbearable. I listened to it on repeat for the next hour.

“You’re Harry Styles, right?” A little dazed, I looked up, gaging the boy ahead of me. I knew it would only be so long before my solitude was spoilt, but I suppose it was to be expected at such an event. The party had been even more agonising than I’d predicted. James, the boy who was hosting, was new to the area and relatively new to the scene that came with his career, and not only was he milking it, but he was putting on a show, building a character before my eyes. I’d met him briefly when I first arrived, but hoped to speak to him a little more before the nights end, advise him to stay true to himself, not to get lost in all the bullshit and be who what he thought others believed he should be. If he really wanted to talk to me about work, that would be the only honest advice I could give. I’d been there a few hours, only really sticking around to be polite and possibly hoping for a bit of inspiration, but that would have been difficult given I hadn’t even bothered to talk to anyone. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing that someone had approached me. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s me.” I sat upwards on the sofa, changing my poise to speak to him properly. “Shit, I’m a huge fan. So good to meet you.” He offered his hand, and I took it. “My name’s Zayn.” “Nice to meet you.” I managed to smile, sort of comforted by his familiar accent, his demeaner. “You an artist?” “Graphic design.” He told me, sitting down beside me on the sofa. “I work on a lot of book covers, posters, advertisement, that sorta thing.” “Nice. You live here?” “I do. And what about you? I’d heard you lived here, but then according to the grapevine, you haven’t been around for a while.” “No, I uh… I moved back to the UK for a while.” “So that’s why your gallery hasn’t been open? I’ve been dying to see your stuff in person.” “M'gunna open again soon. M’just trying to… gather my bearings a bit. Get used to all… this again.” I huffed, gesturing vaguely to the room. He chuckled in a way that suggested he knew exactly what I meant and agreed entirely. “You don’t sound overly impressed.” “Am I that obvious?” I turned my head to him, smiled. “I get it. I feel the same way. I’ve known James for years, and the first thing he spoke about with me tonight was how much his latest piece went for. His new apartment. How fake he thinks everyone else is.” He rolled his eyes. “It’s mad how quickly people change.” I sat forward, still with my eyes on him, a huge smile on my face. I liked him instantly. “What was your name again?” “Zayn.” He answered. “Genuinely, it’s good to meet you. It’s good to talk with someone who… I dunno. I feel like we’re on the same page. I don’t get that often. Not here, anyway.” Just as we were about to really get talking, a rather large group of people approached us, some of them heading towards him, others coming up to me, tearing us away from our talk. There was a mix of people, some that I’d met a few times before, others completely new faces. Zayn got to his feet to greet them properly, whereas I basically retracted back into the chair, overwhelmed by their company, anxious and claustrophobic. They all sort of spoke around me, through me, at me. There wasn’t even really a conversation to join in with, it was all just noise. One of the many things I’d loved about being in Rosebury was the sense of community and family there. When people asked of your wellbeing, they actually cared to know the answer. They were kind, considerate, down to earth, genuine. I understood why my mother had always been so fond of it there, so drawn to that place. I cleared my throat, looking up to the people around me and spotting a girl who was staring right at me, my mind taking the few seconds to place her. And then she smirked, and I knew. She pushed through the crowd, drawing herself closer to me even though I’d dropped eye contact as quickly as I could, desperate not to talk to her. “Hi, Harry.” She leered as she got to me. “Y’alright?” I grumbled. “It’s been a long time. Too long.” She was someone I used to sleep with before I moved to Rosebury in August the year before, our companionship so casual and empty that I hadn’t even bothered to tell her I was moving away. I hadn’t seen her since, and I was glad of it because I knew exactly what she’d be like. She took her place beside me, immediately putting her fingers in my hair, her touch unwelcomed and cold. I really didn’t want to see her. She was so abrasively forward, unashamedly attempting to rekindle a flame that had barely existed between us in the first place. I knew I’d see her eventually, but I’d been absolutely dreading it. I didn’t look directly at her, my jaw tight as I cringed over her touch. “Please tell me it’s true you’ve moved back here.” She leaned close to me, whispering in my ear. “Unfortunately, that’s true.” I seethed, tilting my head the other way, but it didn’t stop her. “I don’t think it’s unfortunate. I think we should pick up where we left off.” My stomach was literally churning with every word, every sultry touch she inflicted upon my body. All I could think of was Alfie. All I could think about was how different it might feel if she was the one running her fingers through my hair, whispering in my ear, how it would feel to have her body that close to mine. I craved to once again experience the feelings I used to get when I was with her, how it felt to hold her, be held by her. But I knew that even if I was with her then, it wouldn’t be the same, not after everything. The day before I’d left, when she came to my place, touching her and being around her just seemed to fucking hurt more than anything else, like I was grasping hold of a memory, or a concept of something and someone I wanted so badly but didn’t deserve. Every overwhelming sensation that used to burst through my body when we touched was gone. Those butterflies she used to create, those beautiful butterflies had stopped fluttering, as though someone reached right into my gut and ripped them out one by one. I would have still taken the agony of Alfie’s touch any day over the way I felt then. “I don’t think so.” I answered bleakly. “C’mon, Harry, I’ve missed you.” She pouted. “We were good together.” “We weren’t together.” “You know what I mean.” She shrugged. “Do you need me to elaborate? Remind you of some specifics…” She trailed her hand to my chest, reaching through the gap at the top of shirt to feel at my skin. I closed my eyes, my nostrils flaring as I tried to keep myself together. “No. I don’t-” “I know you hate nights alone. Let me keep you company.” I turned my head to look at her, be sure that she could see the unyielding look in my eyes, that she would have no doubt at all that I was being entirely truthful about my intentions, how adamant I was that I’d rather be on my own than ever have her in my bed again. But she didn’t even give the chance to speak before she rapidly leaned into me, put her lips on mine. My eyes gripped shut as though I was fighting physical pain, but for a second, I kissed her back. It was a mere moment, a blip of time and thoughtlessness, but I kissed her back. Maybe to test the waters. Maybe because of my hopeless need to feel something, anything. But it was only for a second. Then I pulled away, taming myself as much as possible before I spoke, making sure that I didn’t yell even though that was exactly what I wanted to do. “Don’t ever fucking touch me again.” I wheezed. Whatever that kiss had made me feel, it wasn’t something to be desired. I had to admit to myself that I wasn’t in right frame of mind to be with anyone, even if it was without feeling or meaning. My kiss still belonged to someone else.

June 15th It was 4 AM when my phone rang. That was the first thing I did; check the time. With my eyes barely open and my head blaring, I looked to see the hour before I looked to see who was calling me, worried that I may have overslept and wasted most of my day. But it was early, too early. I didn’t even look at my phone, I just picked it up, not fully conscious as I attempted to answer it, hoping it would be a brief exchange with whoever was trying to get in touch with me at such a ridiculous hour. “Hello?” I just about spoke. “Shit. I didn’t think about the time difference, shit. Sorry.” I recognised Louis’ voice, my eyes opening. “Louis?” I began to sit myself up. “Yeah, sorry, I should’ve waited. I didn’t even think. I just…” “What? What is it?” I rubbed my eyes. “Is everything alright?” “I… I think you need to come home, mate.” My exhale was a heavy one. I think I’d sort of been expecting one of them to call in an attempt to coax me back there. They hadn’t been happy when I’d told them I was leaving. They’d wanted me to stay, for me to be happy, and I’d left them all without giving them more of a chance to talk things through with me. I purposefully avoided them after I’d broken the news, and I knew they’d have much more to say. They really did care about me. That’s why I thought he’d called. “I can’t, Louis. I-” “No, you need to. I know how much you fucking care about her, and she won’t call you herself, so-” “Wait, what? Is it Alfie?” I whipped my head up, suddenly wide awake. “Are you talking about Alfie? Is she alright?” He took a few seconds, his heart so heavy I could literally hear its burden over the phone. And then he told me. “Alfie’s mum died.”

[breadcaaat]

part four

Jeongguk x hybrid!reader

| part one | part two | part three | part four | part five

Words: 3.5k

Genre: action, fluff, eventual smut if i’m brave enough??

Warnings: nudity (again,) blood!!, violence, foul language

“You what, kid? You have three jobs already. Take this and you won’t have any time for sleeping, eating… anything not-working. Seriously, what’s up?”

Jeongguk fidgeted, “I, I need the money.”

Yoongi spat his cigarette butt onto the pavement and crushed it with one hard bootheel, wondering out loud what the hell he’s spending all his money on with a growl. Hookers? Cocaine? Clothes? Food? Probably food. Jeongguk doesn’t have a bad bone in his body. 

He wiped at his lips and thought about it. It’d be nice to have him around, and it’d be good to keep an eye on him. He could also force the kid (not that he wasn’t more than four years older, cough) to take a nap every once in a while, pay him some bonuses so he gets out of that nasty convenience store. 

Thing was, he was already at full staff except for a few shifts, and those weren’t ones he wanted the kid working. Gloss may be a barbershop by day - and a good one, dammit - but at night it served as a tattoo parlor, which was, frankly, illegal since he wasn’t a “licensed medical practitioner.” Those were the times he had shifts open. 

He sighed and glanced over at Jeongguk. Yoongi had met him about a year ago when the kid had walked in one day with a too-shaggy bowl cut asking to borrow a pair of scissors. He’d lent them, curious as to what Jeongguk would do, until the kid walked outside and tried to cut his bangs so he could see properly for work. No mirror. Kitchen scissors. Yoongi had just about had an aneurysm. He’d snatched away the scissors, dragged Jeongguk inside, and made him sit through a proper haircut. The kid had complained the whole time, too, trying to sneak away when he wasn’t looking and moaning about not being able to afford these things, to which Yoongi had sat him back down with a glare and continued each time.

“I’m not charging you jack shit. Sit down. Next time your hair gets like this come back here but for God’s sake don’t take a pair of kitchen scissors to it again.”

Since then, Jeongguk had dropped by every so often - delivering breakfast, finishing the odd task here and there, light drinking on his days off. He was endearing. Sweet. Hard-working. Undeserving of all the shit this city had put him through but hey, those were the motions.

“When are you free?”

Jeongguk visibly deflated in relief. “Saturday, Tuesday, and Friday night, and then all day Sunday.”

“Is Sunday your day off normally?”

Jeongguk puckered his lips, not wanting to say yes but physically incapable of telling a lie. Yoongi huffed.

“Jesus, okay. Keep Sunday. Come in on the other three an hour after the shift before it ends, I don’t really care. Does blood make you squeamish?”

“How often is there blood to see in a barbershop?”

“You know what the night shifts are, Jeongguk.”

“Oh. Oh! The tattoo thing?” Yoongi nodded, and he continued. “No, doesn’t bother me.” Yoongi squinted at him until he broke. “Not that much,” he corrected. 

“Good. Start whenever, and I’ll officially employ you.”

“... No interview?”

“Do you want to be interviewed?”

“Not particularly.”

“Then congrats,” he patted Jeongguk on the back as he passed him to head back inside Gloss, “ - you’ve got the job.” The bells jingled behind him as he exited that conversation, shaking his head. God, he really was worried about him. It’s not like Yoongi was particularly good at remembering to take care of himself - there’ve been plenty of times he’s accidentally not slept for a couple days or forgotten a few meals. It’s just different with Jungkook, because, well, it’s Jungkook. Yoongi can piss on the temple that’s his body all he wants because it’s his, but Jungkook needs to take care of himself. He’s got an ambiguous future full of possibilities ahead of him, and he’s still growing.

“I’m forcing him to take a nap when he comes in,” he mumbles to himself, sliding behind the front desk to check when his next appointment is.

“I want a new name.”

Jeongguk and Stripes were both lounging that night on opposite sides of the bed, Jeongguk exhausted after two long shifts at the breakfast place and the moving company and Stripes restless from staying inside all day since she didn’t have clothes of her own. Jeongguk was going to try and get some hand-me-downs from Miyun, he just needed a proper excuse to not sound like a weirdo. Until then, she was stuck here in her boredom.

He shuffled, turning on his side to look at her. “Why?”

“I don’t like mine. I want a new one.”

“Well,” he scratched at the side of his nose. “What do you want your name to be?”

She paused, tracing the leather in her hands. When she’d discovered the collar that Jeongguk had salvaged on his kitchen table, she’d been admittedly surprised. Since then she’d been holding and thinking about it, reflecting on her past experiences with it.

Her thumb brushed across the tag, a small brass plate bolted into the front of the collar. On it, it had her name, breed, label as a cagedog, and seller.

“Stripes”

CAGEDOG

Tiger - 牧羊犬

Stripes. She hadn’t realized how much she hated being called that until she was looking at the letters, tracing their place on the shackle that’d kept her a slave for the past three years. Her brushing paused. Stripes was a shackle too.

He grunted questioningly, and she sighed, chucking the collar away somewhere near the balcony. “I’m not sure. Just… not Stripes. Only bad people have called me that.”

He nodded, grabbing his phone from the bed stand.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Looking up one of those baby-naming sites. Let’s start by nationality and go from there, yeah?”

She smiled faintly, scooting over a bit. They weren’t exactly comfortable enough with each other to touch in any sense.

“Alright,” he mumbled. “Any, uh, letter you want?”

She shook her head.

“Let’s just browse, I guess.” So, they did, moving through the alphabet and reading the odd one off here and there. It was probably the most comfortable they’d been with each other since meeting (he hadn’t completely forgotten the restaurant but figured that her saving his life was proper moral retribution) though by no means was it chummy. Just… not anxious.

It’s a start, they thought. Seemed the last week was full of new beginnings.

His scrolling thumb paused, and he tapped at a name thoughtfully. “... What about Y/N?”

Y/N. 

Her tail thumped against the duvet and she smiled a bit. Y/N. That name felt like home. “You like that?” he asked. She nodded, then yawned and turned over onto her stomach. He plugged the phone back in and set it aside.

“Alright. Goodnight Y/N.”

She didn't answer verbally, but gingerly let her tail brush his belly like a thankful pat on the shoulder. She's a lot sweeter than she looks, he thought, and fell asleep.

Despite all the exhaustion taking care of another human being cost him, Jeongguk was happy to see changes in Y/N’s attitude and appearance. They were still a little skittish around each other - hell, the way they’d met was so fucking strange in retrospect - but there were moments where things were almost domestic. Little things. Like the way he woke up more often than not with a tail brushing his waist or a finger twisted in the strings of his hoodies. The manner in which whenever he made or brought home food she gravitated towards it with the end of her nose twitching and gleaming eyes. Like how after baths, she’d sidle up to him and stare until he got the message and blow-dried her hair for her, which was both strange and weirdly cute. Her voice had also polished up, and she could speak normally without the no-speak husk to it. These were good days, of course; on others she’d stay on the other side of the room, or escape to the roof, or hide in the bath for a while, speaking very little. More and more good days happened the longer she stayed.

It was as if once she deemed him not-a-threat, all the hostility faded away. He was able to see it now - the bloody, ruthless, tiger-girl act - for what it had been: a survival tactic. She filled him in here and there on how her world had been, and it sounded like it had been honestly horrible.

“Past three years ago, I don’t remember anything.”

“Wait - none of your childhood? All gone?”

“All gone. My life just kind of started up then, and I was living… living a lucid dream. In and out, here and there. This lab, that owner. They groomed me and turned me into something pretty, then sold me to nasty people as a pet.”

“A pet?”

“Mhm. They kept trying to train me - yeah, I see you know what I mean - but I was so angry, it was all I knew. I hurt one of them really bad and got sold off again, a year in, to a cagedogger society. There I was passed around by wealthy cagedoggers until the trade in the ramen shop, when I escaped. I’m the first I’ve ever known to do it. Those men were the poorest and sloppiest of the bunch.”

Hearing all this helped him understand her and her world better, bit by bit, and also offered some surprising closure to the trauma he’d been subjected to in the ramen shop. Has he completely forgotten it? No. Does he not get queasy at the sight of blood anymore? Also no. But it’s so much easier to cope with seeing people die when they’re villains.

Beyond all this, he also found that she had different needs and attitudes decidedly inhuman. Example: the scratching. Two weeks in, Jeongguk had woken up one night to hear her claws picking at the carpet as she stretched, and had woken up to see it all stringy and ruined. He’d scolded her lightly - not really knowing if they were close enough for him to really scold her without her taking off - until she’d explained that she needed to. Stretching, grooming, scent-marking. All very inhuman traits that put him in a bit of a daze. Minutes after, they were meandering over to a pet shop to buy scratch posts. Scratch posts.

There was other stuff, too; the nesting, where she’d pile up used clothes and blankets onto their bed until she deemed it perfect. The midnight walks were a thing too. She’d clamber out the balcony and into the alley to disappear for an hour or two, rejoining him later after a new change of clothes.

Then, at three weeks: play-hunting. It’d scared the shit out of him the first time she’d popped up behind him, tackled him to the ground, and nipped at his ear with a little growl, but he was at a point now where he’d developed a sharp ear for his 6 o’clock. Now when he felt the hairs on the back of his neck prickle he’d whip around and catch her as she pounced. All she needed was a good wrestle here and there to not go stir-crazy, which he was fine with. The general sense of cultural modesty and personal space-bubble he’d grown up with was quickly broken down the more they lived together; bed, couch, kitchen, bathroom. Nudity didn’t bother him so much anymore, which was a surprising development, especially since she was a woman.

There were downsides to living together, though. He’s fucking exhausted. All the time. A few days ago he’d quit his night job at the convenience store and replaced all those shifts at Gloss, helping Yoongi with the shop. He had the suspicion that his hyung was paying him more than the other staff at his level, but he was too tired to complain for the sake of his pride and work ethic. He’d take what he could get. Plus, it was easy work. Keep the place clean, set up some gear, hand him some tools as he worked. There was the whole illegal aspect of it, but honestly - tattoo shops weren’t a major concern for the police force and so Gloss was left alone.

Right now, that’s where he was: sitting on a stool next to Yoongi as he prepared to tattoo matching symbols on a giggly couple, the two girls high on the thrill of doing something outside their parents’ say. Yoongi didn’t seem either irritated or amused; he was impassive, quiet, and growly. Whatever he was feeling, it was completely up to those around him to interpret. It made Jungkook sleepy.

“Antiseptic.” Yoongi set his hand out, and Jeongguk handed a cotton pad of it over. Having watched Yoongi’s process a couple times in the last week and a half, he no longer got nauseous over it. It was actually really interesting. Yoongi would speak up every so often to explain what he was doing, the instinct to pass on what he knew to his younger friend impossible to overcome at times.

Yoongi tossed the pad away into the trash can, quietly double-checking with the girl on the table that the design stencil was what she wanted. Jeongguk prepared to pass him the trimmers as the girl replied with a near breathless Yeah, it’s perfect. Cue a shy little kiss between her and her girlfriend, which made Jeongguk smile a little.

Yoongi trimmed away the body hair where the tattoo would go quickly and efficiently, having practiced this so many times. (Jeongguk had learned that the first tattoo Yoongi ever did was when he was fourteen. Fourteen.)

“Review,” Yoongi drawled in a voice only for Jeongguk to hear, and he ducked down to whisper an answer back.

“Antiseptic to disinfect so she doesn’t get an infection and shave to clear space. And so it heals right.”

“Good.”

Jeongguk preened, sitting back straight.

Next, the stencil. The girls both seemed to hold their breath as Yoongi applied it, and giggled as it was revealed. That made Yoongi smile, faintly; he liked seeing that there were little pieces of the world still naive and innocent as they should be. He hoped these girls lasted despite the knowledge that they’d probably have the typical couple’s dopamine drop in a few months and book it in opposite directions.

The rest of the process was a bit harder to learn and Jeongguk hadn’t quite gotten it nailed down yet, but basically Yoongi would rub in an ointment to help with the process and then begin tattooing, starting with the stencil outline and moving on to color when that was finished. Then there were little finesses to the technique that couldn’t be outlined in a manual, only watched.

So Jeongguk watched.

Here and there he’d pass Yoongi a tool or take a sip of coffee. Twenty minutes passed of this, with the girls cuddling, Yoongi buzzing away, and Jeongguk watching the whole thing.

This is so much better than the convenience store. A headache twinged to life behind his eyebrows and he rubbed at it. Not as good as a full night’s sleep though.

The walk home that night felt exactly like the one when he fell in the river - so exhausted he felt like he was dragging his feet through molasses and eyes dripping shut in the same manner. In fact, all the nights in the past two weeks had felt this way. With his new work schedule he was - arguably - less bored but confoundedly more tired. It was easy to blame Y/N for not working, in his head, but he knew it was wrong to. How could he? There’s no way she could find a job anywhere without being turned away as a freak body modder or cosplayer or whatever the fuck else.

Why is it nobody’s heard about people like her? The cagedoggers? The labs?  It was puzzling, disturbing thought. It made Jeongguk realize just how little the public knew about what happened in organized crime, and it made him feel like they’d all been fooled into thinking they knew anything at all. We know so little. He felt smaller now. The darkness in the streets chilled him just a bit more than usual.

He made sure to walk with a hand on the bridge railing.

The jingle of his keys was the only noise in the apartment building’s hall at this time of night, some time past three. He was woozy, drowsy, and some other adjective for fucking exhausted to the point of mania…

… And wide-eyed fucking awake the moment he stepped inside.

The scene: a wide-open balcony window, a bloodied porch. Red footsteps leading to the bathroom. A crumpled backpack, and next to it, a similarly crumpled pile of clothes. Steam rolling from the bathroom. The sound of scrubbing.

“Y/N?” he asked timidly, scolding himself when his voice shook.

The scrubbing stopped. A sniff.

Jeongguk crept in timidly, his hands shaking. The front door seemed so loud as it clicked shut. He called her name again, hating the way his voice shook. The smell of blood was making his stomach turn.

He peered into the bathroom and met her eyes, already looking up at him.

She was sitting in the bathtub, stripped to the skin and blushing all over from the heat of the water. A flimsy washcloth was gripped in her hand, frayed in places from still-extended claws. Her ears flicked back and her eyes widened, smelling his growing dread. It rolled off him in waves. She could smell his adrenaline.

“I…” The need to explain herself was overbearing, but what could she say?

“Who was it?” he asked quietly. Who died this time?

She dipped the cloth back into the rosy hot water, dragging it over her shoulders. She wouldn’t look at him.

“Y/N.” He growled. He could feel something rising in him - anger maybe? A sense of betrayal? He’d thought and trusted that the vicious tiger girl act was over, but…

“A man and his wife, then another guy,” she murmured, and his stomach dropped. She moved on to explain quickly before he kicked her out.

“I’ve been looking in the past few weeks for all the places I remember being owned in, and found one of the auction centers. I was just going to watch, I promise - I…” She looked up at him then, swallowed. “I just wanted to know. Know more. Figure out why people would own other people and the plan was to go in, check it out, and then leave without ever being seen and I would’ve but then this boy stepped up onto the block - I’m talking a boy, Jeongguk. He couldn’t have been older than eight. This foreign couple bid for him and I was so scared for him and angry. He was… the youngest I’ve ever seen.”

She was silent for a moment, and his posture softened. He didn’t know that kids were ever a part of this, not that that made the situation any more or less horrendous than it was, but… kids.

Her eyebrows knitted suddenly and she plunged the washcloth back into the water, dragging another wave of suds across her neck and shoulders.

“I haven’t told you before but we’re not born like this. I’m sure we start out human. I don’t know the tools they use or the people that do it but they turn us into these things - these hybrids - and then they wipe our memory. Blank slate. I woke up one day with no memory of whatever life I’d lived before and…” she pauses, eyes drooping and ears flattening. “I had claws. Ears. A tail - and my eyes felt wrong to look at in a mirror even though I don’t remember what they used to look like. I didn’t even speak Korean. I can’t begin to describe what that’s like Jeongguk. So for a kid…” She swallowed hard, eyes blurring. Jeongguk found himself softening, chest aching.

“I was just so full of… I don’t know. It felt like regret, but for the kid. Regret that he’s gonna be like me and the rest of the pets. So I killed his buyers. Ripped their rib cages open and hung a guard with the wife’s intestines, from the rafters.”

There was silence for a few minutes. Rolling steam. Rusty blood. The fridge hummed in the room behind him.

“And the kid?” Jeongguk found himself asking before he could filter.

Y/N dunked her head under the water and scrubbed at the blood matting her hair down, ears be damned, then emerged with a slosh of water that seemed so incredibly loud.

“Don’t know. They took him into a back room and I ran away.”

A/N: i’m trying to keep an update schedule, once a week but :/ keep the comments comin!! i live off validation !! !

Taglist:@feed-my-geek-soul @starryannaaa @not-novoa @astronomyturtle @anoushe01 @seokchella @dinorahrodriguez

Taglist glitches: @infiressnct

[lovingstares]

lin yanjun; stranded

pairing; lin yanjun x reader

⇢ word count; 2.3k

⇢ genre; office au, CEO au, fluff

⇢ warnings; probably boring, this is my first time writing on here. please enjoy!

“Are you ready, sir?” I asked him as he walked out of his office. He took a deep breath and nodded, forcing a small smile on his face. I was convinced that he hated going to meetings. He would always do this sort of routine so that he could calm down so I kind of figured.

I gave him a closed lip smile and together we walked to the car garage. When we got there, the doorman handed me the keys and while walking I pressed one of the buttons, unlocking said car. I had no idea which car we were taking. It was always a mystery that I didn’t have control over even though I was the one driving them. Sad, right?

However, over the years of working at this company as the executive assistant to the CEO and driving him to meetings throughout the week, I’ve established my favorite cars to drive. There was the Kia Stinger, which was very luxurious so it could fit the CEO’s taste but it could also go from 0 to 60mph within 5 seconds (which was enjoyable for me even though I’ve only got to try it out once).

Then there was the Audi R8, which was a beautiful car. The CEO owned one in black but the one I drove to his meetings was white. Both were amazing finishes. The navigation in this car was amazing though which was the seller for me. If I had enough for this car, I would’ve bought it ages ago.

And lastly, there was the Jaguar XJ 3.0. This car was absolutely beautiful. If I could, I’d marry it but sadly that would just be weird. This car handled curves so well, it made me tear up every time. Driving down even a pebbled road with this car was a smooth ride. It was enjoyable for me and the CEO could finish up some work without being tossed around in the back.

Although this company had lots of amazing cars, they also had more than a handful of bad ones. For instance, the Pontiac G6. This car was ugly. I’m not even going to lie and say that it had some nice points in terms of appearance because it did not. The whole entire interior was plastic and it wasn’t even well designed! The buttons were way too small as well. It’s like a baby designed this car. The drive was okay but I’ve had way better drives. Sometimes the CEO would even complain about how bumpy it would be.

Also, for some reason they had a PT Cruiser? One of the worst, if not the worst car I’ve ever driven. When I would take it to gas stations alone while the CEO was in meetings that I couldn’t go in, it would just stop randomly. I would be at a stoplight and it wouldn’t turn back on. I would be pulling into the gas station and it would just shut off and I would almost get into an accident because of it. And sometimes when I’m on the highway, the car would just randomly honk! I wouldn’t even be anywhere near touching the horn!

Every meeting we went to was always a mystery for me because I didn’t know which car I would get. Today, though, I knew it wouldn’t be good. As soon as I unlocked the car, I knew.

The keys that the doorman gave me belonged to the PT Cruiser.

I groaned, losing my professionalism for a moment before realizing that the CEO was watching. I straightened up, “Sorry, I just don’t like this car.”

“You have favorite cars?”

“Yes. And this one is not on that list. But I will try to make this an easy ride for you so don’t worry.” I said with a small smile, opening the back door for him. He nodded, getting in and closing the door. 

While walking over to the drivers side, I let out a whine. I absolutely hated this car! Would it stop on us for no reason today? Would we die?

I started the car and already could feel the engine giving out. Maybe I could just ask the doorman for a different key. But as I reached for the door handle, I caught a glance of the clock, telling me that I didn’t have time to get a different car. If we didn’t leave now we would be late.

I sighed, changing the gear shift into reverse and pulling out of the parking space.

So far, the ride was nice. It was quiet, as always, and not as bumpy as usual. Of course, there were a few times where my heart jumped out of its cage because I thought we would die, but we didn’t and so I could rest easily.

A stop light occurred and I started to slow down, preparing to stop. As I stopped, I looked in the rear view mirror, “What is the topic of the meeting today?”

“Stocks,” CEO Lin said without even looking up from his tablet. I nodded, looking ahead of us at the light. It was always awkward when I would drive him, which was all the time because it was my job. I would never have anything to say and so I would usually bring up the oncoming meeting because it would be the only thing I could think of. But his answers would always be vague and I would never know how to respond.

I sighed as the light turned green, pressing on the gas pedal. But, like I thought, the time came. The car inched forward, pretending to not be defective, and then the engine sputtered out and the car turned off.

My heart started racing as I tried to press the gas pedal again. The car didn’t move. I quickly turned on my hazard lights, my movements rushed and panicky.

The CEO must’ve picked up that something was wrong, so he asked what was going on. I brushed it off, “Nothing, the car is just acting up.”

“Why is it off?” he asked. I saw his curious expression glancing at me from the rear view mirror.

If I knew, then it wouldn’t be off! “I don’t know but I’ll figure it out.”

His expression faltered for a bit as he sat back in the seat. I took this time to call the administrative staff and tell them what was going on.

“Hey, Y/N!” One of the staff, named Ziyi, greeted me. We were close because his job was the closest to being my assistant. Just without the title.

“Hey Ziyi! Can you call the member of the staff in charge of the cars and tell them that the PT Cruiser broke down?”

“Yeah sure no pro- wait what?!” He exclaimed, “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, it’s fine but the car is a piece of trash—“ I glanced up into the rear view mirror, seeing the CEO curiously gazing at me. I cleared my throat, “— The car is defective so we are going to see if we can get a new one or find some other way to get to the meeting.”

“Okay. I’ll tell them to send a driver down to go get you,” he said before I hung up the phone.

There was a moment of silence which consisted of me fully accepting this situation and the CEO figuring out what to do with this knowledge.

“So the car broke down?” He asked.

I let out a sigh, “Yes, sadly this was out of my control. This car is really old and not very good at its job.”

A pause, “...Which is driving?”

“Yes. Its job is to drive us safely to where we need to go and back. But it failed.” It was quiet after that. I called the stockholders and told them the inevitable news and they told me that we could always reschedule and that it was no problem. Then I thanked them and told them I would send the email for the reschedule when we get back. And then I hung up and took a breath.

It was so quiet, it was making me anxious. I never had to be in this position with the CEO before. All I did was drive him to meetings and show him schedules and stuff. I never had to be stuck in a car with him for more than thirty minutes. What was I supposed to say?!

Maybe five whole, silent minutes passed before something popped into my head.

“Have you eaten yet?” I almost pat myself on the back for this one!

“Yes.” 

Annnd my confidence shattered. I nodded awkwardly, glancing at him from the rear view mirror. He was looking down at his tablet, like always, and wasn’t paying my awkward mood any mind.

I sighed, looking forward again, but before I could finish the sigh, CEO Lin spoke up, “Have you?”

I was so shocked that he made an attempt to keep the conversation going that it took me a few seconds before his words registered. I made eye contact with him through the mirror and shook my head to get back on track, “Uh, no. I haven’t yet. But I usually eat when you go to the meetings.”

“That’s a shame then, since I won’t be able to make it to the meeting. There’s a cafe down the street though, not that far,” he said, looking back down, “If you’re hungry then I suggest going there. You could probably get there in five or so minutes. I’ll pay for it.”

“I- uh-“ I was speechless, “Thank you. I guess I’ll be back in a few minutes then.” He nodded, handing me his card, “Do you want anything?”

He looked up at me, and for the first time in my whole entire life, I saw him smile. A real one. At me. And holy moly, he had dimples, oh my god-

“I’m fine. I’ve had my fair share of sweets today.”

I walked back to the car with the bag in hand. Despite him saying he had enough sweets, I still bought him something. A coffee, not sweet though because he didn’t like his coffee sweet.

I opened the door, setting the things in the passengers seat and looking back to check and see if he was okay.

I was met with his brown eyes staring back at mine.

He flashed a small smile, but quickly went back to normal as his eyes looked down to my hands, “You’re back so soon. What did you buy?”

“I bought a croissant and some coffee. I actually bought the coffee for you. I figured you’d need it.”

“Thank you.” He said as I handed him the coffee. He took a sip, nodding, “It tastes amazing.”

I smiled softly before turning back around and starting on my croissant. As I was eating, I started to think.

‘I’ve had my fair share of sweets’ but I haven’t seen him get any sort of sweets. And my desk is right outside of his office.

So he either has a secret stash that I don’t know about or he’s covering up the fact that he has diabetes and he can’t eat sweets.

I furrowed my brows as my teeth sunk into the treat. I’ve never seen him eat sweets for that matter. Every time I would make his coffee, it was always bitter. He even sent it back once when someone made it sweet.

He doesn’t like sweets.

So what was he talking about?

“By the way,” he started. I directed my attention to his face in the mirror. He was looking at his coffee cup, “You look really pretty today.”

The croissant I was chewing nearly found its way down my throat on its own. I choked and he looked up.

“Are you okay?”

I nodded, quicker than I ever have before which probably would’ve broke my neck if I continued, “Um, thank you. For the compliment. I don’t really know what to say because you always look good so—“

Wait. Did I just—?

“Thank you,” he responded, confirming the fact that I did, indeed, say that. Wow, where was my brain? “I didn’t mean it to say you don’t always look good though. Today you are just extra beautiful.”

I was so glad I wasn’t eating at that moment because I probably would’ve choked to death. He thought I was pretty? No— not just pretty— beautiful.

“Thank you, CEO Lin.” I said in the calmest way I could. On the inside though, my heart was racing. CEO Lin was, by far, the cutest person at the company. But cute is even an understatement. So to hear him say that I was beautiful was very... nice, to say the least.

I heard him sigh, “Well, since the meeting is now canceled and we are basically stranded until administration gets here, would you like to go somewhere with me?”

“Like where?”

“Maybe the park down the street,” He smiled at me through the rear view mirror, “As a date? And please, call me Yanjun.”

Walking side by side with the CEO— I mean Yanjun— wasn’t very new for me. But doing this as a date was. Unlike I thought, he actually had a lot to say. He was asking me a lot of questions about my life and how I like the job, hobbies, things I like to do at home. Basically, normal questions for getting to know someone. But it wasn’t boring like I would’ve thought, It was nice.

And then I remembered. And I stopped.

He stopped and looked back at me, “You okay?”

“Yeah, I just remembered something.”

He smiled, “What did you remember?”

“Earlier today you said that you had your fair share of sweets today. What did you mean?” I asked, my eyebrow raising a bit. He looked at me with a curious gaze before it went away. Now was the time where I would figure out if he had diabetes or not.

But what I wasn’t expecting was that he would start laughing, “Oh that! You want to know what that was about?”

“Yeah, I’m pretty curious because I never see you eating sweets.”

He smiled, walking up to me, “Just being around you is sweet enough for me.”

[shirlleycoyle]

Apple’s Double Agent

For more than a year, an active member of a community that traded in illicitly obtained internal Apple documents and devices was also acting as an informant for the company. 

On Twitter and in Discord channels for the loosely defined Apple "internal" community that trades leaked information and stolen prototypes, he advertised leaked apps, manuals, and stolen devices for sale. But unbeknownst to other members in the community, he shared with Apple personal information of people who sold stolen iPhone prototypes from China, Apple employees who leaked information online, journalists who had relationships with leakers and sellers, and anything that he thought the company would find interesting and worth investigating.

​​Andrey Shumeyko, also known as YRH04E and JVHResearch online, decided to share his story because he felt that Apple took advantage of him and should have compensated him for providing the company this information. 

"Me coming forward is mostly me finally realizing that that relationship never took into consideration my side and me as a person," ​​Shumeyko told Motherboard. Shumeyko shared several pieces of evidence to back up his claims, including texts and an email thread between him and an Apple email address for the company's Global Security team. Motherboard checked that the emails are legitimate by analyzing their headers, which show Shumeyko received a reply from servers owned by Apple, according to online records.

​​Shumeyko said he established a relationship with Apple's anti-leak team—officially called Global Security—after he alerted them of a potential phishing campaign against some Apple Store employees in 2017. Then, in mid-2020, he tried to help Apple investigate one of its worst leaks in recent memory, and became a "mole," as he put it. 

Last year, months before the official release of Apple's mobile operating system iOS 14, iPhone hackers got their hands on a leaked early version.

At the time, people in the iPhone hacking community told Motherboard that the leaked iOS build came from a stolen prototype of an iPhone 11 that was purchased from gray-market vendors in China. Sensitive Apple software and hardware occasionally leaks out of China, and there is a thriving gray market of stolen iPhone prototypes that are marketed to security researchers and hackers interested in finding vulnerabilities and developing exploits for Apple's devices. 

Apple is obviously not happy about any of this. But over the years, apart from the time it famously went after a Gizmodo journalist who found a prototype of an iPhone 4 in a San Francisco bar, the company has largely kept its response to leaks under wraps. In mid-June, Apple lawyers in China sent letters to a Chinese citizen who advertised and sold stolen devices, demanding they stop their activities and reveal their sources inside the company, as Motherboard reported last month.

“People trust me, and find me pretty likable, and so I’m capable of using that to my advantage”

The secretive Global Security reportedly employs former U.S. intelligence and FBI agents and is tasked with cracking down on leaks and leakers, but very little is known about the way it operates. 

One of the ways the team tracks leaks and leakers is by cultivating relationships with people in the jailbreaking and internal community, such as ​​Shumeyko. It's not the first time something like this has happened. As Motherboard reported in 2017, an Apple employee had infiltrated the early jailbreaking scene, acting as a double agent. 

​​Shumeyko has never worked for Apple, but he assumed a similar role last year when he decided to give Apple information about the iOS 14 leak. He had obtained a copy of the leaked iOS 14 build himself, and said he also learned how the leak went down and wanted to share the information with Apple.

On May 15 of last year, ​​Shumeyko reached out to Apple Global Security via email, according to an email chain he shared. He offered information about the person who allegedly purchased the iPhone 11 that contained the iOS 14 development build, the security researchers who got a leaked copy of the operating system, and a handful of people who apparently live in China and sell iPhone prototypes and other devices that appear to leak out of factories in Shenzhen. 

"I think I found the mole who helped him orchestrate the thing," Shumeyko wrote to Apple, referring to the iOS 14 leak and the person who allegedly purchased the stolen prototype. "I've identified which one of the 3 Chinese hardware suppliers sent him the phone. I’ve received a package from that same guy in the past (still have the DHL tracking number), and I have his phone number. Would any of the above be of any aid?"

Do you work, or used to work for Apple? Do you research vulnerabilities on Apple's devices? We’d love to hear from you. You can contact Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai securely on Signal at +1 917 257 1382, OTR chat at lorenzofb@jabber.ccc.de, or email lorenzofb@vice.com

At the end of the email chain, an Apple employee asked if Shhumeyko was free for a chat.

"What’s the number you use for Signal/Telegram? We will assign a member of the team to reach out," the employee wrote. 

Shumeyko said he was willing to help as a way to redeem himself for being part of that community, and to get some money out of it, according to him and his online chats with an Apple Global Security employee.

"People trust me, and find me pretty likable, and so I’m capable of using that to my advantage," ​​Shumeyko told the Apple employee during their monthslong online chats. "I regret my involvement in all that stuff and I’ll do whatever you need me to redeem my past actions." 

"I know I’ve been naughty, but my actions so far landed the right connections which I can use to help further the company. Getting into this whole thing was a mistake on my side," ​​Shumeyko told the Apple Global Security employee. 

What he shared was interesting enough to prompt Apple employees to keep the communications channel with Shumeyko open for almost a year. 

Two people who are part of the Apple jailbreaking and internal community confirmed that ​​Shumeyko was dabbling in it by advertising leaked data on Twitter.

“He is widely trusted to be an original source of that information.”

"He’s tweeted a lot with internal materials from Apple," one of the people in the Apple jailbreaking and internal community told Motherboard in an online chat. "I think he is widely trusted to be an original source of that information."

Another person, who also asked to remain anonymous as he, too, is involved in the jailbreaking and internal communities and fears retaliation from Apple, told Motherboard that ​​Shumeyko "was most definitely involved in that community and he most definitely had some level of access to things he shouldn’t have." 

According to the person involved in the jailbreaking community, "the 'Apple Internal Community' is just a bunch of kids on Twitter who find, buy, sell, and trade firmware or other such things without realizing the repercussions such things carry." But other than kids, there are also serious sellers, mostly based in China, who sell prototype iPhones for thousands of dollars, as a Motherboard investigation showed in 2019. 

And Apple has been trying to crack down on them recently by sending them legal letters, which revealed that the company knows their names and home addresses, despite the fact that they only use nicknames online. 

Last year, ​​Shumeyko sent Apple investigators a PDF titled "The List," essentially a dossier where he shared personal details such as phone numbers, WeChat IDs, and alleged locations of three people who advertised and sold devices on Twitter, as well as a U.S. citizen who collects iPhone prototypes. One of the people listed in the PDF is the one who received the legal letter from Apple, Motherboard has learned.  

Apple declined to comment for this article. 

None of the people ​​Shumeyko mentioned to Apple, and whom Motherboard spoke to, had any idea that ​​Shumeyko had become a mole for the company. 

When he was acting as a mole, ​​Shumeyko wanted to keep his relationship with Apple a secret, "fearing I might damage that fragile thing we had going on," he said, referring to the company. But at this point, now that he’s coming out, ​​Shumeyko doesn't care what anyone will think of him.

"Them knowing what I am doesn’t really change my life for better or worse. And, well, I just wanted to be heard for once, and the story I tell to be truthful," ​​Shumeyko said.  

Three iPhone prototypes. (Image: Giulio Zompetti/Motherboard)

Months after he first reached out, Shumeyko explained more about why he wanted to help Apple.

"I was inspired by the rumor that the raid on the journalist’s house during the iPhone 4 Gizmodo incident was conducted by Apple’s own ‘police’ team," ​​Shumeyko told a Global Security employee. "So I assumed prosecuting [an iPhone prototype collector who also traded leaked information and hardware] and the Chinese would be easy then, and that I’ll get to walk away with a reward generous enough to jumpstart my life entirely."

Shumeyko said he expected Apple to "do something" with the information he provided, but it's unclear what the company achieved with ​​Shumeyko's information. Despite asking many times for details about how the company was acting on his information, the Apple employee he was corresponding with never gave him any answers. ​​Shumeyko also repeatedly asked if it would be possible for him to be paid for his information, citing financial problems he needed to take care of. In this case, too, the Apple employee was noncommittal, according to the conversation's transcript. 

"I know I'm very much a part of the problem that I'm trying to report, and I really hate to be the Karen of this story, but still, I'm determined to fully follow through with this and I'm sorry for being a huge inconvenience," ​​Shumeyko told the Apple Global Security employee, according to the chats viewed by Motherboard. "I know you probably can't answer all of my previous questions, so could you kindly get someone who can talk to me over email or this app? Again: 1) How helpful were the materials provided? 2) Should I try to obtain more information? 3) Do I get any protection at all as a whistleblower?" 

Still, his constant flow of tips on people in the jailbreaking and internals community, as well as tips on Apple employees who were active online and were leaking information, were well received by the Apple Global Security employee.

"We appreciate the information you provide. Please feel encouraged to keep sharing what you have," the nameless Apple Global Security employee said. The chats between ​​Shumeyko and the employee spanned almost a year, and the Apple employee consistently thanked ​​Shumeyko for the information and asked for more information about specific materials and people. 

In the summer of 2020, ​​Shumeyko told his Apple Global Security contact that he’d been in touch with an Apple employee in Germany who worked on Apple Maps. ​​Shumeyko alleged that the employee was offering to sell access to an internal Apple account used by employees to log in to their corporate emails and intranet. ​​Shumeyko said he always kept contact with the employee, who eventually told him that he’d gotten fired. 

“Do the right things to protect Apple. Keep it that way, you will be proud of yourself, so will we.”

​​Shumeyko said he was hoping that by helping Apple, the company would help him in return. But that, he said, never happened. And he's now questioning whether he should have helped in the first place.

"Now it feels like I ruined someone for no good reason, really," ​​Shumeyko told me, referring to the Apple employee in Germany.

Weeks later, out of frustration, ​​Shumeyko said he leaked the information he gathered from the employee to the Apple-focused blog 9to5Mac, which wrote an article based on the leaked data. ​​Shumeyko almost immediately regretted it, telling his Apple contact,"I know that looks bad. And I apologize for that."

"Going forward if you plan to publish anything, please consult us (if you want to do the right things for yourself)," Apple Global Security's employee told ​​Shumeyko. 

"Please understand that our goal is to protect Apple. All our actions are guided by the premise of what is best for the company, our employees, and our customers (of which you are one). Therefore your help—and insights—in understanding possible threats to us are very important," the Apple employee continued. "My personal advice is that you continue to do the right things so that you can build a positive image for yourself. Do the right things to protect Apple. Keep it that way, you will be proud of yourself, so will we."

During his conversations with the Apple Global Security employee, ​​Shumeyko shared the contact information and social media profiles of three alleged sellers of stolen devices in China, a person who collects these type of devices and who was allegedly involved in the iOS 14 leak, and the personal details and names of connections of someone who allegedly used to be an Apple intern and then became part of the jailbreaking community. 

A year after ​​Shumeyko started talking to Global Security, his relationship with Apple is basically nonexistent. Shumeyko said he last heard from Global Security on July 15. 

​​Shumeyko told Motherboard that he is still struggling financially. He is also still on Twitter trying to sell Apple data in an attempt to finally cash out on years of being involved in Apple leaks.  

A screenshot of a recent tweet by ​​Shumeyko (Image: Motherboard)

"Don't really enjoy doing this," ​​Shumeyko said in a recent chat. "But I also do need the extra money. Unfortunately, I have more pressing issues to be worried about other than Apple." 

Meanwhile, one of the people who knew of ​​Shumeyko and is part of the jailbreaking and internal community said ​​Shumeyko's story as an informant will make people suspicious and less open to talk about leaks. 

"I think it goes to show that you can’t openly and safely experiment with leaked Apple internal materials," he said. "These sort of events sort of enhance the hostile vibe sometimes felt in the community." 

Subscribe to our cybersecurity podcast CYBER, here.

Apple’s Double Agent syndicated from https://triviaqaweb.wordpress.com/feed/

[cxsmicmyeon]

hi hi! it's your bestie 😉 hehe sorry i had too much screen time and needed a break 😂

oh my goodness his fried rice waffles 👁👄👁 he also called himself a culinary genius and i'm wondering how kyungsoo deals with jongin's kitchen adventures lmao or even minseok since he's such a clean freak?? baek just updated and said he's doing well in a strict routine! but for everyone to stop sending mail/email/gifts to his training centre bc it's overwhelming them 😂 so to just tell him everything using a specific hashtag and he can feel the love when he's finished. can you imagine how much they're getting??? lol

i've always used the excuse it's still that date in america soooo technically it's still my birthday 😀

OMG YES PLEASE WRITE THAT!!! that's so cute and domestic stop lol 💞 i feel like a bunny would be a lot less maintenance especially if you're out often! unless you adopt? a puppy is SO much work. ..maybe that's why mine is such a baby. he's almost 6 now but still acts like a puppy we just brought home yesterday 😂 omg that time chanyeol had toben and sehun had vivi? the chaos that was toben LMAO

i sometimes want to start a fic rec blog..but i'm so unorganised i'm not sure how to go about it. i do so much reading and there're so many good fics out there i want to share 😭

we pretty much are but there's some random clusters here and there. plus the newly returned overseas but they're quarantined in a medi hotel. yeah i've seen a lot of news from the us about people refusing to wear masks and stay home. but then turn around and complain that things aren't getting better 😶 yes please keep safe!! ❤

i think the cheaper one is a flip book album! which ofc will be mega cute, i can already imagine! i want sm to bloody release the details though. why are they so lazy when it comes to their best sellers?! is it tomorrow for you yet? 😂 DID YOU GET IT!? omfg yes lol i CAN'T WAIT for your asmr HAHA 👉👈 tbh your voice sounded so sweet i felt comfortable messaging you 😂 when you were fangirling about myeon hahaha that's exactly what i'm like when someone asks about yeol hehe

LOL THE WAY I THOUGHT HIS FRIED RICE WAFFLES WERE HASHBROWNS- ngl though it looks good though i'd eat it...😳 kyungsoo prolly had a mental breakdown when he saw jongin making the waffle LOL

OMG WAIT I CRIED WHEN I SAW BAEK'S VIDEO- HE SAID HE'S GONNA BE UPLOADING EVERY 17TH???? AND CHAN UPLOADING EVERY 27TH??? WE DO NOT DESERVE THOSE TWO AT ALL😭😭😭omg i can't imagine all the mail he's getting- i think something similar happened to junmyeon and he had to go on and say stop sending me mail cuz it's too much ahsgdj,, my popular boys🥰

I WILL WRITE IT!! i just need to get through school and finish my final paper lol!! and also finish my requests lol!! thank god school's over next tuesday for me lol! i need a BREAK omg... agh yeah i have heard puppies are a lot of work but they're SO CUTE THOUGH😭😭omg toben and vivi are both of my personalities🤣🤣they're literally the cutest things omg

lol i actually was considering a fic rec blog too! cuz my post is rly long and i feel bad for all the tags the authors get LOL but i'm lazy and i don't want to annoy the authors EVEN MORE LLMAOSODNDNJFHF i love life😃👍🏻

ugh yes i have a lot of family who is anti mask and won't get vaccinated and don't take covid seriously and it just pisses me off🙄🙄but thankfully most of them don't live in my area so i don't have to worry about seeing them a lot lol! and i have both of my shots for the vaccine and i'll be fully vaccinated after next week!

i'm not picky at all when it comes to albums lmao! like even if i don't get a jun photocard i don't complain that much bc i still got a photocard of a member!! like i have a jun, yeol and minseok photocard (and baekhyun poster and jongdae slide thing from obsession) and honestly i'm still happy to get the merch cuz it's exo and i love exo!! :D

AND AGH IM SO SAD IT SAID IT'S COMING LATE😭😭😭like it was gonna originally come on saturday but then usps said thursday (today) and i checked the tracking number and it said "coming late" )): agh but we'll see 🤞🏻 i just hope it comes soon!!

AGH i need to prepare for the filming😭😭i need to find a tri pod and clear my desk and make sure my family doesn't interrupt me AJDHJDH and AAA i hate my voice so much i was so shy when recording!!! but i turned my phone around and spoke from the heart and i felt more comfy!! i may not speak in the asmr tho i'll just let my glue on manicure do the talking LOL!! i love hearing nails tap on stuff so it'll be fun to do!!

[dailrpwmf-blog]

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Hi, Im 16 years I m 18 and live say I got it for the damages(the quote work provides and her my injuries. Due to going to take the am pregnant. My husband job is travelling around on how to approach for me and my How much would insurance and how much i provided to find a Does every state require can be immature. Marriage Kawasaki Ninja 250 or HUGE difference! Does anybody of jobs on my CHEAP green slip company? have progressive as auto insurance. I m shopping for health care is more in the last 5 would my auto insurance would like to be true that some car way? I used to where i can get to use my own never had a traffic insurance. The car that gotten we shots because at worst, he ll only help as much as checks/tests or whatever it 50,000 Personal Injury - like some info on authority (CEA) offers, which pay for insurance, but much is it per .

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[ciathyzareposts]

Amazon – The Bridge of Reloading (Request for Assistance)

Jason Roberts Journal Entry #2: I’ve made it to Rio Blanco – it’s taken a bit of effort – getting past one homicidal pilot and more than one deadly piranha. But for some reason I feel I need some cigarettes – and I don’t even smoke! (Boy those things must really be addictive.) I have $1000 in my wallet – should I go to a shop and buy them like a normal person… nah, I have a better idea… Flashback: Chapter 4

Well, after my last gameplay post, I was politely informed in encoded comments that I had dead-ended myself. Thanks to Voltgloss (and some confirmation from Alex Romanov) I was informed that I’d missed something important in Chapter 4. So I reloaded back to that chapter and tried to find what I’d missed.

First I tried other dialogue items with the ticket seller and barman and see if there was anything I could do with Alberto the Rayon salesman, but had no luck.

Then I furiously looked at every section of every item outside, and I found that the TRUCK and TRUCK DOOR were two separate items – it’s a good time to note that this game has no mouseover tooltips or any way to differentiate which parts of items are separate without actually LOOKing at all parts.

Now that I knew the truck had a door, I opened the door, but there was nothing inside. Fortunately I was paying particular attention as I knew I’d missed something, and I noticed a white pixel that was somewhat out of place.

That while pixel below my feet wasn’t there until I moved (opened) the truck door.

The white pixel turned out to be a pack of cigarettes. I’ve never been a fan of puzzles that make me take things that any normal person would buy at a store, and it’s not like Jason had no money at this point, so I’m not a fan of this puzzle at all.

Anyway, that’s it for our flashback. Let’s get on with the next Chapter.

Chapter 6

After dealing with Tony Martin and the deadly piranhas, I’d arrived at Rio Blanco. El Loco, a giant bully in a yellow shirt, sits lazily in front of the hotel and won’t let me in. I expect I’ll have to get rid of him somehow seeing as he’s the title of the episode.

Other things of note in this village are a cantina, a small trader’s shack, a well, an abandoned church that I don’t seem to be able to interact with and a small canoe. I can sense I’ll be on the canoe in future, but look at the other areas first.

I take some extremely spicy cayenne peppers from a cart, and look at the small trader’s stall. There looks to be lots of potentially useful items here.

I almost KNOW I’ll be needing this item at least.

Unfortunately when I try to take stuff, I’m told that I don’t have enough money. I check my inventory and notice that the cash I took from Allen’s safe is gone – perhaps it got wet and floated away in the plane – anyway, without the ability to make a purchase, and as I also seem unable to enter the church, I check out the cantina instead.

A lot of people are in the bar, but most of them won’t talk to me. The cook will, and is helpful.

But she speaks English with a very American accent which doesn’t seem right for the location.

Got it – so I need to pretend I’m a god!

She tells me that El Loco eats a lot and while I’m in the cantina she’s constantly making meals which a boy picks up and then, if I go outside, I see him take the meal to El Loco, then he comes back, repeating the process.

I decide to spice up El Loco’s next meal with my cayenne peppers, and am told that he’ll notice them unless I hide them in the food. Looking around more carefully I notice a knife on the bar. I wait until the cook turns her back, then take her knife. I combine the knife and peppers in my inventory, wait for her to turn her back again and put the chopped peppers in his meal. After the boy picks up the newly spiced meal, I go outside and watch him give it to El Loco.

El Loco does not like his chicken spicy!

El Loco runs to the well and starts drinking, so I enter the hotel he’d been guarding.

Inside the hotel I find a payphone, a rattrap, a rat hole and a rat that occasionally runs down the stairs to his hole. I take the trap and check out the hole.

Well, hopefully I won’t be needing an index finger for the rest of the game.

I don’t think the rat actually ate my finger seeing as I don’t get a game over screen or die of rabies. Seeing as the most likely place to find rattrap bait is the cantina, I go back there.

Some of the patrons that were there before have left, and one of them hadn’t finished his cheese enchilada, so I take it.

Gee, twenty years in jail for stealing somebody’s leftover food that would have been thrown out anyway – seems a bit harsh.

Anyway, waiting until the cook’s back is turned, I take the cheese enchilada and use it with my rattrap. I then go back to the hotel and put my loaded trap on the stairs. The rat hits it, dies (that’s for biting my finger, pal!) and I empty out his rathouse.

Is 300 pesos a lot? I’m going to assume that’s a lot.

My pesos are all in paper form so I still can’t use the phone, but again checking out the cantina and looking more carefully next to the enchilada remains, I see some peso coins.

After spending twenty years in jail for stealing garbage I’d hate to see what I got for actually stealing money!

I use my peso coins with the hotel phone and dial ‘the number’. I wasn’t sure what number I was dialing, but I’m sure it’s important.

The phone rang a few times, but nobody answered. Then I had the vague recollection of having to let it ring a certain number of times. Checking my old screenshots confirmed that Allen told me I’d have to call a number and let it ring three times. I did that, then hung up and went back to the cantina. After a few seconds, a woman arrived.

I speak to her, and one of my two options always mentions Allen and makes me seem keen. I don’t know anything about this woman yet, and don’t want to give away my identity so I ignore those and tell her I have questions of my own.

Shouldn’t you have said ‘Hasta La Vista, Baby’.

Reloading, I excitedly ask about Allen instead of caring about who she is. She then gives me a small questionnaire.

I failed her test the first time.

I didn’t have a screenshot of me looking at inconsequential items, so I reloaded to a much earlier save and looked at the trophies in my apartment. Allen’s stock car trophies were won in 1952. I looked at other things and kept them in my mind so I could pass her stupid test.

Blue… no, yellooooooooooooooooooow

She tells me she’ll take me to Allen, so I leave. Outside the cantina I now see El Loco punching the boy who delivers his food.

I can get in a canoe and leave, that’s what I can do.

Before getting in the canoe, which the woman is now sitting in, I decide to use my pesos to buy what I can from the trader’s store. I buy…

a paddle, for 25 pesos

poison roots for 45 pesos

a fishing net for 40 pesos

a machete for 70 pesos

some ammo for 100 pesos

That all costs 280 pesos so I assume I have 20 pesos left. I climb onto the canoe, and we get a narrated text screen telling me what happens next. Maya takes me to a hut next to the river. In the hut, I find my injured brother.

So, during the entire canoe and walking trip you never told me your name. Must have been a pleasant journey.

Maya had found Allen near death and nursed him back to health. Allen told me the lengthy story of his expedition. Part of the story was told from his point of view over the opening cutscene, which was quite cool.

I assume the Director’s notes for Allen’s speech was, “say it with the same emotion you’d have if you were reading random names from a phone book, and also as if you’re reading it now for the first time – ACTION!”

So, you were just pretending to be asleep while all your friends died around you. Brave work, Allen. Brave indeed.

But before I left the tent, I put on my much brighter blue jeans.

We give Allen a few more days to get well enough to continue looking, then walked through the jungle. We continue walking until we find an old decrepit bridge. As we approach, we hear gunfire and find Sanchez’ men coming at us.

Seems mighty heroic of you, Allen. Why do I get the feeling you’ll die as soon as the rest of us are safe?

Chapter 7

We start the chapter with Allen shooting while Maya and I stand near one end of the bridge. Sensing danger (the chapter’s called The Bridge of Death, of course I sense danger,) I look around before attempting to cross the bridge.

Seems I don’t have time to look around.

Reloading, I find the obvious item, a sheet of corrugated iron, sitting next to the bridge. I move it.

Allen alternately shoots, then ducks behind the corrugated iron!

Side note: Corrugated iron is such an important part of Australian history that it had a major part in Sydney’s Olympic Opening Ceremony in 2000.

Another Side note: Olympic opening ceremonies are weird!

Well, that’s a problem solved. Now that Allen has cover I’m sure he’ll be able to hold off the bad guys for…

At least it’s nice of the death scene to tell me what I should have bought a chapter ago.

I already had the ammo. Perhaps Allen should have mentioned being low on ammo so I would have thought of  giving him some. Either way, I reload, and give him my ammo. Now that he has cover and plenty of ammo, I should have ample time to think about my next…

This is like a much less funny version of the babel fish puzzle from Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Oh well, I’ll just forget about looking around, quickly set up our iron shield, give Allen some ammo, then walk across the bridge straight away.

Okay, so maybe I do need to take time to look around. Looking around more carefully I also find a log, which can be used as a support beam for my corrugated iron. Let’s try again.

Move the iron, move the log, give the ammo. Now, so I don’t fall, I have the clever idea of using my fishing net to stabilize the bridge. I just have to find the right spot.

Um… game… I’m standing on the bridge. How close do I have to be?

I die various ways in this section trying to get closer to wherever the game thinks the bridge is, all so I can try using inventory objects on it. At some point I discover that the middle of the bridge gets a different description, and is labelled BREAK.

I keep trying to find the right place to interact with the bridge, or the newly discovered break. I can’t do anything with Maya as clicking on her just describes the item behind her. Allen can’t help – when I try to do stuff with him the game just tells me he’s too busy. At some point I discover that there’s a vine above my corrugated iron that I can pick up. I do it. Of course, if I try to explore the entire area and am careful to take my time getting over the bridge…

Aah. Let’s try again. Reload, move iron, move log, give ammo to Allen, get vine, cross bridge. Use vine on bridge.

I’m at least a third of the way across – HOW CLOSE DO YOU WANT ME?

I try doing stuff in this area for a long time.

Eventually, I determine that I needed an item I didn’t have. I know I have everything from before Chapter 5, because the hints I got at the end of the last post mentioned an item in Chapter 4. So I went back to earlier in Chapter 5 and looked around more carefully for something that might help me cross a bridge.

How did I not notice this ladder earlier?

Checking out my previous screenshots, I know why I didn’t notice the ladder earlier – it wasn’t there most of the time – it didn’t appear until after I spoke to Maya – and after I spoke to Maya I just bought some stuff and got in her canoe – I hate you for that, game! And I hate that walking around this screen, particularly vertically, takes an annoying long time.

Anyway, assuming the ladder might help me with the bridge, I continued through the very long section of Allen describing his adventures, got back to the bridge, moved the iron, moved the log, got the vine, died, realised I forgot to give Allen the ammo, reloaded, moved the iron, moved the log, gave Allen the ammo, got the vine, died many times trying to use a ladder, vine or net on the bridge or the break…

Then I noticed something. I had been very unobservant! At the top left of the screen in the bridge section was a small picture of Jason, and there was a small picture of Maya at the top right. I clicked on the picture of Maya and could now control her instead.

Yes. I’m an idiot. And yes, I checked the manual afterwards and the icons for controlling Jason/Maya were mentioned there. But, a tip for any game makers – try not to have the first instance of a new interface feature also be a rushed timed sequence – give the player a chance to get used to it in a previous relaxed screen first.

Anyway, I easily walked Maya onto the bridge because she’s lighter than Jason, and used the vine on the break to fix it. Now it should be stable enough for the men to cross.

Then Allen interjects and tells me to go first. I follow Maya across and Allen starts to follow as Sanchez’ men catch up…

You’ve got red on you.

Before Allen dies, he cuts the rope with his machete so the bridge collapses and we won’t be followed. Then we get one of the funniest examples of bad acting I’ve ever seen in a game.

I think it’s even funnier if you just look at Jason the whole time as he waits for his cue to say his line.

With Allen dead, Jason wonders for a moment if he should now just give up and go home, but quickly determines that he needs to continue so Allen’s sacrifice isn’t in vain. Jason’s next location is marked on Allen’s map – the name of Hans Stroheim has been noted next to the village of Tefe.

I’m now standing in front of a boat, The Amazon Queen, looking at its captain and first mate. I talk to the captain, and after going through some dialogue options, offer him some cigarettes as payment for my passage to Tefe.

What else? Are you serious? I already reloaded to Chapter 4 to get the cigarettes!

I look at what else I have in my inventory that he might like. I offer him my ladder, machete and cayenne peppers. I offer him Jason’s car keys, the map… every single thing I have. And it’s annoyingly time-consuming to do so, as I have to restart the conversation and listen to his greeting every time I want to offer him something different.

Hey, didn’t you used to be one of the Village People?

Looking around, there’s not much I can do here. The cargo, boat, captain, first mate, jungle and stump are the only things I see and I try interacting with them all but can’t find anything to do but talk to the captain. Some of his dialogue options suggest that something else might count as payment.

Look, I’ve spent so long in this chapter, I’m willing to do anything – how about you, Maya?

Let her speak for herself, Jason. If I can’t think of anything to do, you’ll be standing right here forever so maybe you should look at all options.

I once again reload to the village of Rio Blanco, wondering if I’d missed anything else. I did – I find a wooden pole outside, take more of the leftover enchilada and a lighter on one of the other tables in the cantina – a lighter! The captain wanted something other than cigarettes, so of course he was referring to something to light those cigarettes. I play the rest of Chapters 6 and 7 again – through Allen’s long cutscene, through the Bridge of Reloading (a few times, because I took too long to do stuff), watching Allen die. (he’s cutting the support rope – Nooooooo!) And finally, I’m back at the Amazon Queen and can offer the boat captain a lighter as well as the cigarettes.

Oh, you have got to be kidding me!

REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE

So, I’m stuck. I don’t know what Captain South America wants. Or at least, I don’t have what he wants.

I thought perhaps I’d spent too much money on trading shack items and could buy less and still have some cash, but on reloading realised I had cash when I left town but it disappeared some time before I arrived at the Bridge of Frustration. I took 300 pesos from the rathole and only spent 280 at the store so should have still had 20 pesos. Maybe Jason ate the money to keep himself awake during Allen’s boringly told story – at least Jason only had to listen to it once – I had to put up with it four times.

Perhaps there was something I should have done to rescue the boy from El Loco’s misplaced wrath. I tried talking to them or giving them things, but it didn’t seem to work.

I also tried every single combination of dialogue options (there were 16) with the Captain and didn’t find one that worked.

And so here I am, requesting assistance.  As always, hints should be encoded in ROT13, starting with very vague hints, then getting gradually more detailed. Much like Voltgloss’ hints in the last play post.

Thanks in advance. I’m looking forward to getting out of this seemingly endless Chapter!

Session time: 4 hours

Total time: 7 hours 20 minutes

Inventory: Compass, Map, Jerrycan, Cigarettes, Peppers, Machete, Poison root, Paddle, Fishing net, Cheese, Knife, Lighter, Ladder, Small pole, Jason’s Car Keys (NOTE: I can also use the knife with the peppers to create chopped peppers)

Items picked up after reloading old saved games: 5 – Cigarettes, Ladder, Peppers, Cheese (enchilada), Lighter, Small pole. Amount of times the word ‘bridge’ appears in this post: 24

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/amazon-the-bridge-of-reloading-request-for-assistance/

[financevisionary]

6 things you should never spend your money on

Unless you're a robotic, you possibly don't have an excellent budget.

Nor must you. What fun is it to go with life like a strolling spread sheet, never doing anything spontaneous or spending lavishly a little?

But you don't need to be a robot to realize you're possibly throwing away a little cash here and there.

Not every little thing you pay for deserves it, as well as you recognize this.

What you may not know is some things in life typically aren't worth spending for in any way-- period.

1. Landlines

If you haven't doinged this currently, it's time to ditch the landline and also rely upon your cell phone to make all your incoming and outward bound phone calls. Cell coverage is nearly global as well as, like it or otherwise, many people now treat their cellular phone like a 5th limb that could tweet and take selfies.

The typical American pays $71 towards cell service a month, so it's not sensible to be paying additional for something as redundant as landline solution, also if it's less than $25 per month.

Something to look our for: Telecomm carriers usually provide deals on TV and also web service by packing them together with landline service.

This might save you money in the short-term, however there's a likelihood that after Twelve Month, your landline solution might leap from $0 a month to $35. Always make certain to check out the small print on discount provides that appear to excellent to be true.

2. Extended Guarantees On Electronics

Electronics retailers enjoy to supply clients a prolonged warranty as they're taking a look at, and while assurance could appear worth it, you should hand down it.

Here's why: In spite of public assumption, electronics are more reliable compared to we recognize. For instance, only 4.3 % of brand-name LCD Televisions break and call for repair. Also if you're amongst the unfortunate 4.3 % with a busted TV, there's a great chance you're covered, IF you got the TV on a credit history card.

Most significant bank card offer a warranty that double the maker's, which is normally 1 year on an HDTV. Make sure to review your card's terms as well as conditions before thinking anything, though.

Extended warranties vary from store to seller, however they have a tendency to set you back around $120 for two-year extended intend on an HDTV (providing you three years of coverage total amount).

The added year of coverage might be wonderful, however is it worth it? The response is no-- you're much better off playing the probabilities that your TELEVISION will not break.

3. Lottery Tickets

I hate to destroy it to you, yet you're not visiting attack it abundant playing the lotto.

Your opportunities of victorying the Powerball are 1 in 175,000,000. That's all that actually requires to be said on the matter.

What about other forms of lottery, like scratch-off tickets? Your probabilities typically aren't as bad as the Powerball, yet they're still against you. In Illinois-- my home state-- scratch-off lottery game probabilities are provided on-line, so you could view precisely what you're acquiring into.

For a $5 'Ca Cash' game ticket, the odds of racking up a prize are 3.92 to 1. In various other words, if you buy 392 tickets, you could anticipate to have 100 victors. Remember that several of those winners will not allow pots (some will probably be just a couple of bucks).

4. Mobile phone Screen Protectors

Smartphone devices are amongst one of the most marked-up options for sale, duration, and also the worst transgressors are display protectors.

Buying a display guard could make good sense on the surface area-- your phone is crucial to you and it's costly. Why not invest in a little to protect it? Allow's run via a couple of things.

First, a screen guard isn't going to quit your display from cracking if it's lost without a situation. It only safeguards it from scrapes. You should absolutely buy a situation for your phone to shield it from difficult drops. Situations typically aren't a waste of money.

Second, there are relatively few risks out there that have the ability to scratch your phone. Many mobile phone displays are constructed with Gorilla Glass, a scratch-resistant product. The 'softest' thing efficient in damaging Gorilla Glass? A hardened steel file. Items that cannot damage it? Coins, home secrets, and also even kitchen knives.

Simply put, absolutely nothing in your pocket or purse is a risk to your screen. Save $25 and also do not buy a display protector.

5. Your Credit Report

If you have an interest in keeping tabs on your credit history report-- and you must be-- you need to never ever pay a penny for it.

If you have a bank card, opportunities are among your complimentary card services is credit report tracking. Discover and also Chase-issued cards provide it, and also many various other cards do, too. If your card service provider does not provide it, give them a telephone call and ask-- it never ever hurts.

Also, try Credit rating Karma. It's a complimentary credit rating keeping track of site, and while it won't give you your FICO score completely free, you could still obtain an adequate concept of where your credit score stands.

6. Shipping

This one is most applicable throughout the holiday, yet it still holds real throughout the majority of the year. From Black Friday with the end of December, retail is so competitive that an individual out there is constantly providing free delivery on the option you want.

If you have Amazon Excellent (our analysis: you should-- it deserves it), 2-day delivery is cost-free on every little thing sold straight by Amazon, which is a considerable amount of stuff.

Other retailers, like Walmart, Most of all Buy as well as Target, will not constantly offer cost-free delivery, yet totally free in-store pick-up is usually an option. Finest Buy, for instance, requires a minimum invest of $35 to obtain cost-free shipping, which is very fair.

Back to the subject of in-store pickup: It's not as hassle-free as having the product provided to your door, however it's totally free. At some stores, same-day in-store pickup is readily available, which is nice.

[365-money-diary]

DAYS 91 - 97

DAY NINETY-ONE

9:15 AM - Up and at ‘em! We convinced my boss to let us work from home today, so I crack open my laptop and get to work.

10:00 AM - Boyfriend comes home with coffee and bagels. What a sweetheart!

1:30 PM - We pick up my ASU Grad friend and take her grocery shopping at Sprouts. We have no food at home. I buy a bunch of veggies for veggie sandwiches, some cookies, chickpeas, dark chocolate hummus, salsa, a couple frozen items, salt and vinegar almonds, and non-dairy cream cheese. Boyfriend buys a bunch of bread and other miscellaneous stuff. $60.22

1:30 PM - I also get a bottle of conditioner. $11.91

2:00 PM - We run to Chipotle. I get a burrito this time and it’s so good. I finish about two thirds of it before pitching it in the trash. I cover mine and my boyfriend’s. $14.05

2:30 PM - Back to work.

7:00 PM - I end up meeting BFF at Tops for a drink. It’s great catching up with him! $6

9:00 PM - Boyfriend and I end up ordering Jimmy Johns for dinner. I pay. $20.47

DAY NINETY-ONE TOTAL: $112.65

DAY NINETY-TWO

9:15 AM - I wake up feeling super rested. This is the first night I’ve slept over 7 hours this entire weekend.

9:30 AM - I pour myself a toddy from the growler my boyfriend bought for us from Cartel and toast myself a bagel from the baglog bought yesterday.

10:00 AM - I clean the house a little just to feel like I did something mildly productive. I also call a friend while boyfriend runs to his office to get some files to catch up with him about my eventful weekend.

1:00 PM - I make chickpea salad and throw it in the fridge. We don’t eat it for a couple hours because it’s better cold. During this time, I take some photos of my products for my e-commerce store and load them onto my computer to edit. I end up buying an app that converts gifs to videos. I’m sure there is a free that doesn’t give you a dumb overlay, but this one is super simple to use and seems worth it. $2

3:00 PM - Lunch! -- Chickpea bruschetta and watermelon.

3:30 PM - I knock out one of the shots and my boyfriend helps me color correct it. He then offers to do the rest for me since he’s a real graphic designer.

5:00 PM - I send my boyfriend logo inspiration for my e-commerce store and spend the rest of the evening messing around on the internet and watching Forensic Files. They added 7 more collections, so I know how I’m spending my time over the next three months.

10:00 PM - I make my boyfriend watch Mars Attacks. He hates it.

DAY NINETY-TWO TOTAL: $2

DAY NINETY-THREE

8:30 AM - I had a pretty rough night’s sleep but I’m blaming it on not doing much yesterday.

9:00 AM - I arrive at work beating all of my colleagues. I pour myself a toddy and toast a piece of bread.

10:00 AM - I am trying to make a habit out of buying 3 records per month to put toward my giant 4.5 hour set I play monthly at Valley Bar, so I can get to the point where I don’t have to repeat artists and have a little variety to swing between. I buy a Suburban Lawns EP on Discogs. $27.00

11:00 AM - I’m on a roll today. I place an order for a Kleenex/Lilliput record. The seller immediately sends the invoice. $23.25

12:15 PM - I walk to Sprouts and can’t figure out what I want to eat. I have some of those BBQ pockets left over from last week, but I don’t want to eat chips as a side. I end up buying a bag of coleslaw and pour a little white vinegar into a container from the salad bar. $1

1:00 PM - I combine the coleslaw with the vinegar and add some vegenaise, a little sprinkle of sugar from my colleague’s coffee supply, and some salt and pepper while I heat up a BBQ pocket.

5:00 PM - I head home from work. On my way home I help my mom’s really old friend configure her email on her iPad with my mom over the phone.

6:00 PM - Boyfriend and I decide on veggie sandwiches and fries for dinner. I preheat the oven and get cooking.

7:00 PM - Boyfriend clears the kitchen table and we enjoy our dinner together.

7:45 PM - We end up spending the rest of the evening watching various documentaries and stand up specials.

DAY NINETY-THREE TOTAL: $51.25

DAY NINETY-FOUR

9:00 AM - The money I’ve set aside for myself for the month has hit my PayPal account. I transfer it to #NOTSIMPLE with the hopes that it will hit the account before the weekend.

9:30 AM - Work! Toddy and toast time.

12:00 PM - I am onto day two of coleslaw and BBQ pockets. Maybe next week I’ll be ready to commit myself to salad. I read catch up on some R29 Money Diaries while I eat.

5:00 PM - I’m super hungry when I get off of work. On my way home, I stop at Sprouts to grab a scoop of salt and vinegar almonds and a loaf of bread. $5.01

6:30 PM - Chickpea salad is for dinner again. We eat and then my boyfriend takes a nap. While he is napping, I walk to Tops to have a drink and read. $6

9:00 PM - Back home. I continue reading and at some point, fall asleep watching basketball.

DAY NINETY-FOUR TOTAL: $11.01

DAY NINETY-FIVE

8:00 AM - My sister calls and wakes me up. I’m already starting my morning on the wrong foot.

9:00 AM - I arrive at work and don’t even make coffee or anything I’m tired and annoyed. I do see that my PayPal transfer has hit #NOTSIMPLE so that’s at least good. I transfer $50 into my mixer goal and $500 into my CR-V goal leaving me $1220.36 left to spend for the rest of the month.

11:00 AM - I realize the source of my annoyance is that my period is on its way. Boo hiss.

12:00 PM - I head to Phoenix to grab lunch with my boyfriend and his coworkers at Crescent. I get a bean and rice burrito and boyfriend picks up the tab.

2:00 PM - I head home, fix my typewriter, and watch What The Health on Netflix. It’s so good and really re-inspires me to continue my vegan lifestyle.

5:30 PM - I check Facebook and got tagged in a status by my boyfriend’s brother about going to a D-Backs game by my boyfriend. We all agree to go. Boyfriend buys the tickets but I’ll reimburse him at some point.

7:00 PM - We almost melt on our way to the stadium. I buy boyfriend and me waters. $12

9:45 PM - D-Backs win! We’re starving and end up ordering Jimmy Johns for dinner. $17.99

10:45 PM - We fall asleep watching Eric Andre and eventually basketball.

DAY NINETY-FIVE: $29.99

DAY NINETY-SIX

10:30 AM - We sleep in and it feels so good!!!

11:00 AM - We make our way over to Cartel and grab coffee. $9

11:30 AM - It’s definitely a mall day. We head to AZ Mills and take a lap. Boyfriend finds some Dunks at the Nike outlet and I find a deeply discounted Eric Bledsoe swingman jersey. I’m stoked that it’s a jersey with sleeves. Not so stoked it’s bright orange, but whatever. I’ll definitely wear it to games. $59.46

1:30 PM - We decide we want to see a The Big Sick this afternoon, but need to eat first. We end up at a newer Mexican joint that we’ve heard good things about. I get a taco salad and boyfriend gets a burrito. We share some chips and salsa. This place is incredible and we are definitely going to come back! Boyfriend grabs the tab.

2:30 PM - I buy the movie tickets. $18

4:00 PM - The movie was so good! I cried more than once.

5:30 PM - My friend is planning a music festival in the park and asked me to book a stage. We’re apparently having a meeting about it right now at Boulders so he swings by and grabs me since I’m 400% on the way. I get a beer and we start scheming. $7

8:00 PM - I’m home. We end up fending for ourselves for dinner. I end up eating some potato chips and chickpea salad.

10:00 PM - We watch a ton of basketball and fall asleep relatively early.

DAY NINETY-SIX: $93.46

DAY NINETY-SEVEN

9:30 AM - I wake up ready to start my day. I shower first before we hit up Cartel. Our barista gives us coffee for free today and then we head over to Einstein’s where boyfriend covers the bagels.

10:30 AM - We take a trip down south to Costco. I buy a flat of La Croix, two loaves of Dave’s Killer Bread, a gallon of coconut oil, and toilet paper. $51.63

12:00 PM - We head home and order Jimmy Johns for lunch. $17.99

3:00 PM - Boyfriend leaves for a show while I practice beatmatching.

5:30 PM - I head to Crescent Ballroom to meet a friend before heading to a birthday party. I grab a sangria. $6

6:30 PM - Birthday dinner! It’s so fun. I chat with various friends and drink too much wine. $34.08

9:45 PM - I’m home! I watch some 60 Days In season 3 while I wait for boyfriend to come home from the show. I fall asleep pretty fast from the wine.

DAY NINETY-SEVEN TOTAL: $109.70