#harry tpwk

[mustachrryluvr]

omg imagine being in subspace and you’re just so incoherent and harry is just holding you and telling you how good you are for him and he notices how you’re trying to suck on his thumb and he just sticks it in your mouth and is like “is that what you wanted princess? you’re so good for me” like holy shit 🥺🥵#Concept

I saw some other accounts get this request, but, since I got it too, here’s my take on it!! 

Word count: 2.6k

Warnings: smut, female subspace 

Harry comes home unexpectedly and is insatiable.

— — — — 

It usually took a lot for you to get into subspace, but Harry got you there so fast tonight that you’re not exactly sure how or when it happened. 

Harry has been on tour lately, but you had some responsibilities to tend to back home that kept you from traveling with him for the beginning of the last leg of Love on Tour. You had just flown into London today as Harry had a show coming up in a couple of days in Coventry that you would be traveling to. You had hoped to be able to spend a travel day with him as he had planned to stop by London before the show, but he had gotten stuck in Germany for an extra day and would have to go straight to Coventry the day of the show. 

It was only about a two hour drive from London to Coventry, but you hated travelling alone. It would just be you and the driver Harry had hired for you, which technically meant you wouldn’t be alone, but you preferred it be Harry with you. But you decided you would worry about that when the time came and just spend your evening catching up on some shows you were behind on.

You had stayed in Harry’s London home many times, but this was the first time you stayed there alone. The two of you had been dating for 2 years, so it wasn’t weird that he let you be in his space alone, but it still just felt weird to be there without him. So, you made sure you had things around you that made you think of him. 

The first thing you did when you got to his house was ravage his closet for a sweatshirt that smelled like him. Then, you took a blanket and pillow from his bed and brought them down to the couch to cuddle up with while you ordered Chinese takeout from the takeaway shop the two of you always order from. 

As long as you felt his presence around you in some form, you were okay. 

While cleaning up the kitchen and putting your leftovers in the fridge, you swore you heard a door close. You paused for a minute, but didn’t hear anything else so you assumed the noise just came from the tv playing in the living room. 

However, when you back to the living room, there he was. 

“Harry?!” you said, jumping back a little, not expecting to see anyone standing in the room. 

“Wh-what are you doing here?” you continued as you walked up to him. 

Before you even made it halfway to him, he raced forward, grabbing you, and pressed his lips to yours. 

As he’s pushing you backwards towards the couch, you try to mumble against his lips to ask him what he’s doing here but it's no use. “Harr-mmmmmm”, is all you get out as he pushed his mouth deeper into you. You feel the backs of your legs hit the edge of the couch and have no choice but to sit as he lowers you down. He continues to push into you until you are laying with him on top of you with him still devouring you. 

Harry gets comfortable laying on top of you between your legs as you accept his deep kisses and wrap your legs around his waist. You feel him push his hips roughly into yours as he slightly lifts his lips off of yours. One hand is placed on your waist while he moves the other up to hold your jaw. You look at him in awe as he finally says his first words of the night.

“I missed you so much, pretty girl,” he rubs his nose against yours as he continues with his hips still rutting into you. “You’re gonna do whatever I tell you to tonight, okay? Be a prefect, good girl for me. Can’t go another minute without you.” 

You’re completely immersed in the moment at this rate, and you subconsciously decide to ask him why he’s here later. Because right now all that matters is him. 

You give him a small smile and nod at his words. “Mmmmm, already wet and excited for me, aren’t you lovie?” he asks, pleased with your reaction to his words. 

“Always for you,” you get out before he’s crashing his lips back onto yours. 

You’re not sure what has made him so insatiable in this moment. Yes, it’s been a while since the two of you have been intimate since it's been a while since you’ve seen each other, but this feverish desire to have you right now isn’t something you’ve seen from him before. Not that you’re complaining. 

Harry and you were no strangers to playing around with dom/sub dynamics, and it is obvious that Harry wants to delve deep into that world tonight as he is rutting his hips into you so aggressively at this rate that you are already being stimulated enough that you could come if he kept it up. It was only when he was in his dominant headspace that he acted rough with you. You both enjoyed it a lot, but you also were very aware of your intimate moments and didn’t want them all to be rough and dominated by one person, so you often played with different types of dynamics all the time. 

But, to be honest, “Dom Harry” was your favorite version. So, if he wanted you to be his “perfect, good girl” tonight, you best bet that’s exactly what he is going to get. 

Being what Harry needed in that moment was all that mattered to you. 

He had come on so strong and dominant right away that it pushed you into your subby headspace quickly. You weren’t near subspace yet, but you wouldn’t be surprised if you ended the night there as your need to please Harry and Harry only was already so strong. 

Without another word, Harry quickly stripped you of your sweats and underwear before doing the same to himself. 

His cock sprung up to his lower stomach, the tip an angry, fiery red as he growled at the relief he must’ve felt. You mewled and brought your eyebrows together in concern at the sight as all you wanted to do was help him rid himself of the pain he was probably feeling. 

He could read your thoughts all over your face. “Aw, don’t worry about me baby. This sweet, little cunt is gonna make me feel so much better, isn’t it?” he says while stroking himself with his attention on your soaked core. 

You moaned at his words. His filthy language always making your chest feel full in the best, most erotic way possible. “Please Harry, use me. I just want you to feel good…please, H,” you whine out to him in the most delicious way that almost has him losing all his composure right then and there. 

Without another word, Harry leans forward over you, wraps your legs around his waist, lines himself up with you, and slams himself as deep as he possibly can into you. You both let out near pornographic moans. You at the painfully, pleasurable intrusion, and him at the sudden warmth and tightness that surrounded him. 

He could’ve come right then and there, but he fought the urge by immediately pulling out and slamming right back into you.

You could barely even get any moans out as he kept his quick pace. You could only emit tiny whimpers before he was already pushing another one out of you. You had no control over your body in this moment and just decided to give it all up to him. 

“Pretty girl just gonna let me use her like a rag doll, huh? Taking me so good that you can’t even control yourself,” he pauses to groan as you involuntarily clench around him in response to his words. “God-Fuck, baby. Cunt made just for me, I swear. I don’t know if I can ever go without.” 

It was right then when he decided to switch his pace from fast and rough to slow and deep that you could feel it. You could feel yourself falling under, falling into your subspace. All you could feel was him. All you could hear was him. All you could see was him. You were absolutely consumed by him. 

It usually took a lot for you to fall into subspace, but this time you fell quick, and hard. 

You gasped airly and looked at him with big eyes and furrowed brows when he thrusted into you especially deep, hitting all your spots. 

“Yeah, baby? Right there, huh? Gah..so good for me…” he sighed out that last part as he leaned further into you, enclosing his whole body around yours. Isolating you from being able to look at anything but his face. 

“Harr…” you gasped out as you reached your arms around his back and clawed at his back, roughly grabbing at his shirt he was still wearing. 

He felt you tighten around him as he watched your jaw drop and eyes clench shut all while he felt your fingers cling to him as if he would disappear. He knew then that you were about to come (which was for the best because he really couldn’t hold out much longer). 

“Such a good girl for me, come on baby, let go. Be my good girl and let go.. y-yes that's it, pretty,” he moaned out as you let go, your mouth open in a silent moan as your whole body seized and convulsed under him in immense pleasure. 

Harry followed and released into you soon after as your release completely sent him over the edge. 

As each of you came down from your equally strong highs, you relaxed into the couch as Harry placed all his weight on you with his face resting in the crook of your neck. It made you feel safe when he did that. 

After a minute of catching your breaths, Harry was the first to speak out. “Did so well for me, pretty girl.” 

He paused for a moment, expecting to get a response from you, at least a blissed out hum. However, when he got nothing in response, he immediately was worried. 

“Lovie?” Harry lifted his head and brought one hand up to gently smooth over your jaw. He finds you looking at him in completely awe and adoration. Eyes slightly glossy as you look deep into his eyes. 

“Oh, princess. You’re deep, aren’t you?” He shifts his body weight onto his free hand placed next to his head so he can pull his weight off of you, but you immediately freak out that he’s gonna leave you. With a sad and worried look on your face, you flatten your hands on his back and hurriedly speak out, “No, no, stay. Please.” 

“Sweetheart, shhhhh,” he quietly responds as he lowers himself back down on to you. It’s now that he realizes just how deep you are. Absolutely beyond floaty. He wraps himself back around you, but still keeps one and on your jaw as his thumb slightly caresses your cheek. 

“I’m not going anywhere, baby, okay? Harry’s staying right here with you.” You sigh out at his words, closing your eyes again as you revel in the feeling of his body on yours and nuzzle your head into his hand that rests on your face. 

Harry hadn’t even noticed you getting floaty and hadn’t expected it since it usually takes a lot to get you there. He wasn’t complaining though, because he felt so much happiness knowing that you trusted him so much to allow yourself to get into this headspace with him. He knew that being in subspace was a vulnerable thing and doesn’t just happen with any partner, so he was elated to know that he felt safe with him. 

He just laid there for a moment, looking at you with adoration. Letting himself feel the pride coursing through him. Proud of you and your willingness to be vulnerable with him. “You did so good for me today, princess. Thank you for trusting me.” 

After he spoke, he took a moment and realized he was slightly worried about you, though, as you were quieter than you usually were when you were in subspace, but just tossed it up to the fact that you got very deep very quickly and your system wasn’t used to that. 

As he admired you for a moment, he noticed you nuzzle deeper into the hand he had been caressing your cheek with. For a moment you seemed to get frustrated and let out a small whine as he moved his hand along with your movements. 

“What is it baby? Hmm, what do you need from me? I’ll give you anything,” he says as he moves his thumb that had been on your cheek to your bottom lip. 

When he placed his thumb on your lip, you immediately opened your mouth with a gasp, your eyes going wide almost begging him with your eyes. 

“Oh, lovie,” Harry chuckled, catching on to what you wanted, and allowed his thumb to slip behind your lips as you hummed and gently began to suck on his finger.  “Is that what you wanted princess? You’re so good to me.” 

Harry laid with you for a while as you continued to suck on his thumb. If that was what was going to bring you comfort in this moment, then he would let you do it forever. You had never needed this type of comfort before, but he was willing to give you whatever you needed. Aftercare was very important to the both of you, and this is just what it looked like for you today. 

You must’ve dozed off a bit, because the next thing you knew, Harry was gently taking you into the bathroom where he already had a bath ready for you. 

“Hi, lovie,” he softly said to you when he saw your eyes open up. They were brighter and less glossy now, telling him that you had come back to him. 

“Hi,” you softly replied with a small, content smile on your face. 

Neither of you spoke again as he undressed you and himself before placing you in the warm bath. He got in right behind you and pulled you into his chest where you immediately relaxed. 

“You’re back with me now, right, baby?” he asked has his hands rubbed up and down your arms trying to keep you grounded with his touch after coming down from your floaty state. 

“Yeah, Harr. Felt so safe with you, had to let go,” you responded quietly as you closed your eyes and enjoyed his touch. 

“That’s okay. I always want you to feel that safe with me.” 

You sat in silence for a few minutes before Harry picked up your loofa and some soap to begin cleaning you up. As he started, you spoke up, “Why are you home anyway? I thought I was meeting you in Coventry?” You turned a little to look at him, confusion written on your features. 

He chuckled as he continued to clean you off, “Was supposed to stay in Munich an extra day for a meeting, but it was cancelled. Thought I’d just come home and surprise you.” 

“Surprise me and fucking devour me is what you did goddamn. Bout gave me whiplash with how quickly you came at me” 

Harry loudly chuckled at that, “Oh, shut it. I know you absolutely bloody loved it.” 

You giggled before you responded, “Mmmm, yeah, I definitely did. Love you, bub.” 

“Love you, baby.” 

You two sat in silence throughout the rest of your bath before you retired to bed. It wasn’t long before you were tangled together, sleeping the night away. 

— — — — 

That was something… lol haven’t written smut in a HOT minute so I'm so sorry if it’s eh…also didn’t proofread so there are probs grammatical errors but whateverrrrr 

Thank you for this request!! Feel free to send others! Please check my masterlist to see who I write for and my other works!

[narrycherries]

you sunshine, you temptress

you are normally an anxious wreck, and something about Harry’s hands calms you down (and his teeth..) * slight smut

masterlist // join the tag list

[ part 2 ]

word count: 3.7K

warnings: Harry x reader, soft!dom harry, biting, spitting, smut, some fluff

**[due to two messages I’ve received since posting this, I want to clarify that this relationship is completely consensual! there is no forcing or pressuring! xo]

Harry was sitting at his desk, eyes fixated on the computer monitor, when you gently tapped your fingers on the door. He looked past the screen and gave you a nod, silently assuring you that you weren’t interrupting anything. It was nice that he worked from home the majority of the time. That meant that you could spend lots of time with him and that when you were having bad times, he was just a few rooms away.

He didn’t fully turn his attention away from the contract he was reading over, though. You felt a sting in your heart as you realized he wasn’t looking your way. But you stayed calm and softly walked across the room, your socks muffling your footsteps.

Once you were at his side, hands fumbled with each other as you waited, he finished the paragraph he was on and adjusted the cursor over the next section so he wouldn’t lose his place.

“Hi, my sweet girl.” He said as he turned in the chair, his hands extending for you to take or to step closer, whichever you wanted.

You opted to take his hands and squeeze them tight before placing them on your waist. When you didn’t say anything, he became more concerned. He pulled you closer, wanting to give you some comfort. He could easily tell when your anxiety was hyped up. Your breaths were shaky and your eyes avoided his - simple but key things he noticed every time - on top of other signs.

“What’s the matter, angel baby?” He hummed, dragging you between his knees. Your eyes were placed on his shoulder instead of his face. “Hey, sweet pea. I’ve missed you.”

You nodded softly, indicating the same thing back to him. He knew you were long gone as your hand moved to his shoulder, sliding to the collar of his shirt and you started to gently scratch and pinch his skin.

“Wanna sit in my lap, baby?” He asked in a soft voice, remembering how easily you could get triggered by loud or overwhelming noises.

You nod again, allowing him to maneuver your body. He took notice of your attire - leggings and an oversized sweatshirt. It was August and you usually never got cold, so he was confused as to why you had a long sleeve item on.

“Are you cold, baby?” He asked, toying with the hem of the sweatshirt as you leaned your side against his body.

“Yeah.. Cus m’not by you.” You muttered out, eyes closing as you savored the feeling of sitting on his lap, his arms secured around your body. His attention was fully yours now. “Miss you.”

He kissed your cheek a few times. “I miss you, baby. You can stay with me for a bit.”

You nodded softly as you picked at your thumbnail. Harry carefully pulled one hand away from the other, knowing you’ll destroy your skin if he didn’t. You huffed and snatched your arms up, crossing them over your chest. He sighed, but kept his cool. He wasn’t intending to set you off, just wanted to look after you.

“M’not tryna be mean, baby, okay?”

“I know.. just don’t.. like it when you do that.” You stared down at his hand that was resting on your thigh.

Your mind drifted off for a moment. You couldn’t resist thinking about how much you adored his hands - how he rubbed your back, caressed your belly, squeezed your breasts. He did so many wondrous things with his hands. He loved to play with your hair and tickle your waist and hold you while you slept. But your favorite things were when he let you suck on his fingers and thumb, whether during sex or while trying to sleep. Most of all, when he rubbed your clit or explored your womanhood - pulling, pinching, and flicking through your folds and over your nub.. that was your favorite.

“Someone’s distracted, hmm.” He said, squeezing your waist as he pressed a line of kisses down your jaw to your chin. “Do you need something special, baby?”

You thought for a moment about your options. Did you want pleasure? Or did you want to give him pleasure and receive praise? You loved either idea, but you weren’t sure. Harry’s thumb and index finger bumped your chin, forcing your head towards him.

“Baby doll, don’t be shy with me.”

“M’not.. just thinking ‘bout what I want.” You pout your lips out, eyes locked with his.

“I can take a twenty minute break, okay?” He looked at his computer for a moment, then shifted his focus back to you. “Whatever you need, baby, just tell me.”

“Twenty?” You softly whispered, your head leaning against his now.

He chuckled back. “I guess it depends on what you want, doll. Y’know I’ll make exceptions.”

That made you feel a little better. You took a deep breath and pushed it through your nose. Your body was experiencing a lot of anxiety, thankfully it was slightly better now that you were with him. But you weren’t sure what you wanted.

“I dunno yet.”

He licked his lips as you looked down at your legs again. “You don’t have to pick anything specific. Just wanna sit with me for a bit?”

You shrugged. “I wan’ to do something special.”

For the first time in what felt like forever, you sat your hand over his on your thigh and started tracing his skin. He gave your hip a knead, wishing he could probably feel your butt.

“You’re anxious, yeah?”

“Mhm.. a bit.”

He pressed his lips to your cheek, making you blush. “When you’re anxious.. you like f’me to make you feel good, don’t you, baby?”

You nod. He slid his hand up your leg, pushing the sweatshirt out of the way. It was way too long for you. You watched as he got closer to your crotch,

“Let me make you feel good then, angel.”

You curled your fingers around his wrist and stopped him from moving any further. He frowned, confused as to why you weren’t letting him do this.

“Wan’ your other hand..”

He smirked. “Want my better hand, hm?”

“This one gets tired too quick.”

The chuckle that left his throat made your heart skip a beat. He was just so attractive to you in every way. You turned slightly, your hands grabbing his face to yank him towards you. He hummed as his mouth fell on yours, tongues slipping around and lips smacking against one another.

Harry gripped your waist with one hand, the other clutching your hip. He wasn’t letting up on you. He sucked on your tongue, making you moan into his mouth. You pulled away, fingers gripping his jaw to keep him back. Immediately, your eyes fell to his lips - they were red liek yours now, slightly swollen and covered in a thin layer of spit. You licked your own lips, wanting to swipe your tongue over his skin to clean him up.

He knew that look in your eyes all too well. His lips pulled into a smirk as he let saliva gather in his mouth. You gulped, hoping that he was going to let you do your favorite thing.

“Please.” You whispered, eyes trained on his mouth as he parted his lips. “Wan’ it, please.”

Without saying a word, he swished all of his spit onto his tongue and knocked your hands down from his face so he could move. You whimpered as you touched his chest, waiting patiently. Harry tapped your chin, a silent command for you to open your mouth. You stuck your tongue out past your lip, eyes watching him closely. He held your jaw and angled your head the way he needed it to be.

A rumble exploded in your stomach as he spit onto your tongue, his taste filling your mouth. Your panties were getting damper by the second. He did it again as you pulled at his shirt, begging for more.

“Hold it, baby.” He mumbled as he let his hand fall from your face. “Look so pretty with my spit in your mouth, don’t you?”

You frowned your brows gently, nodding your head as he slipped his hand under your shirt. Harry knew what you wanted next - his command. You were not in any sort of dominating relationship, but you loved it when he was that way with you.

“Go ‘head, baby doll. Show me what you love doing.”

You released a gentle moan as you spread his spit onto your lips, smearing it over your skin. He watched with a hard smirk, eyes focused on your mouth. You scooped it all back up and move it from cheek to cheek, tasting him was your favorite thing.

“Swallow it f’me, baby.” He said with a lift of his brows.

You pushed it all down your throat and stuck out your tongue, showing him it was all gone. He gave you a proud grin and grabbed your chin, bringing your face back to his. He kissed you for a long moment - it was sloppy and messy, tongues rubbing all over, spit mixing together and being passed around from mouth to mouth. It was dirty, like you liked. He had never experienced this kind of intimacy before you, and neither had you. It was just something that unfolded with time - something you both found within yourselves, only for each other.

“M’baby might be a bit more than anxious, yeah?” He said breathlessly, finally pulling back to take a break. “Are you horny, baby doll?”

A grunt slipped past your swollen lips. “Needy.”

He smirked at your correction. Despite being so filthy with him, you didn’t like hearing certain words. He pressed his lips to the corner of your mouth.

“Wan’ me to take care of you, baby?” His hand pressed into the small of your back. “Make it all go ‘way?”

You nodded, hands gripping either side of his neck. “Please.”

“Turn ‘round.” He patted your thigh, wanting you to adjust yourself in his lap.

You moved around, throwing a leg on either side of him, sitting down on his thighs like you belonged tbere. That’s because you did. Once you were situated, his hands grasped your body and you felt more of that anxiety in your gut fade away. You were comfortable.

“Tell me what you need.”

You groaned, tilting your head back in frustration. “More than twenty minutes.”

Harry chuckled. “Baby girl, y’already know I’ll give you all the time in the world.”

Once you received that assurance from him, your throughts went wild. You scratched at his neck, but not too harshly - the reminder than he has an important meeting tomorrow was stuck in your head, only because he’d have to leave you home by yourself.

“Mark me, please.” You said softly, one hand slipping onto his jaw to move his head where you wanted it, and he of course let you without putting up a fight. “Wanna be yours.”

He smirked against your throat as your head fell backwards. “Already mine, baby girl. But I’ll remind everyone.”

You sighed in relief as he started sucking on a spot of skin, pulling it into his mouth, drawing your blood to the area. For a second, you thought about stopping him but you didn’t want to - not all the way, at least. Your fingers locked in his hair, slightly pulling at his roots. He thought you were just reacting to him, letting him know you were enjoying it. So he frowned when you used some force to yank his head back, tearing his mouth from your skin.

“Baby, I thought-“

Your thumb covered his lips, making him silence himself. Sometimes you got a bit bossy, but without taking control or gaining any dominance. You get what you want whenever you want, never have to do any work unless you want to.

“Bite me.” You muttered back, eyes boring into his.

His brows dropped. “Baby, y’know I don’t like using m’teeth on your neck.. s’too pretty for brutal marks.”

You groaned, sliding your thumb over his teeth before letting him envelope it into his warm mouth. “Don’t have to do many.. just a few, please.”

“No, darling. I’ll give you marks but no bites.”

You whined, frustrated with him at this point. “Baby, please!”

“We have dinner plans Saturday, baby. It’s easy to cover the bruises.. not teeth marks.”

You gave his chest a shove, making him huff back at you. “Harry, please. Don’t wanna beg you.”

“M’not gone let you, baby. I said no.”

Your nails sank into his shoulders, even though the fabric of his shirt he could feel them piercing his skin. His big hands grasped your hips, trying to calm you down but it wasn’t working. You were getting irritated with him.

“But I get what I want. You always promise me that, bubby.”

You attempted to sway him by using a soft, sad tone of voice and one of his favorite pet names. But it didn’t seem to work. He shook his head and pressed the pads of his fingers deep into your thick hips.

“I said no.” He sighed, closing his eyes for just a moment.

“Harry, pretty please.” You pout, rolling your bottom lip out and giving him wide eyes, doing whatever it possibly took.

He shook his head again. “No, honey. No.”

You didn’t like it when he denied you of soemthing you wanted. It happened so rarely that you never were able to handle it right when it did occur. You pushed out a breath, your lips turning to a frown.

“Then stop!” You suddenly blurted out, grabbing his wrists to push his arms away from your body.

“Baby, don’t.” Harry quickly tightened his grip on you, knowing you’d be unable to pull him off. “You’re acting like a child.”

“You’re being mean to me!” You felt your lip start to quiver, and of course he immediately noticed it.

“Nuh-uh, none of that, darling.” He was trying to be as sweet as he could.

He never liked it when you got upset, especially if he was the cause of it. The last thing he wanted for was your to cry over this - because he’s denying you of what you want.

“Baby, I don’t wanna hurt you. Everytime i bite you the way you want.. You bleed.”

“S’cus I wanna! I wanna hurt.. wan’ the pain.” You struggled to take in a proper breath. “You know I like it.”

Your arms slinked around his neck, pulling your self against him. His head was forced into the crook of your neck, but he didn’t fight you. If he was being honest, he was confused as to why you suddenly wanted his touch, weren’t you mad at him?

“Please, Harry, please.” You whined quietly. “I wan’ your teeth on me, please. Love you so much.. wanna be marked.”

“Baby.”

“I’ll do anything, bubba! Please!”

Harry took in a breath and carefully released it, his warmth spreading over your skin. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling and twisting to keep a hold on him. You felt hopeless, despite not wanting to give up. Harry could easily tell you were being genuine - whenever you were needy, you were just needy. There was no pretending or trying to deny it, he knew that.

He gave in. “You’re wearing your hair down Saturday.”

The second his teeth sunk into the side of your neck, you let out a loud moan of absolute pleasure. You adored the pain that shuddered through your body - straight to your core. Soft whines fell past your lips, getting lost in his hair as you shifted your head.

Harry’s fingers roughly grabbed your jaw and forced your head back where it had been, allowing him easier access to your neck. A thousand things flooded your mind all at once - each of them revolving around him. You wondered if he was really enjoying this. It was nothing new to you - the fact he didn’t like inflicting too much pain on you. Rougher sex was one thing, at least he knew then you were getting pleasure and an orgasm - but biting you so hard.. that was a whole other situation. He didn’t like doing it, the pain was a different type, the physical effects it caused to your body made him hate himself. But yet, he always did it whenever you asked because you were his princess - and princesses always get what they want.

The other main thought your mind kept circling back to was whether or not he was getting off on this. Was he just doing this to make you happy? You started to grind your hips down, trying to feel for any hardness. He groaned as you rubbed against his erection, a smile covered your lips. Of course he was horny, when was he not?

“Harry.” You muttered as he started working on a third mark, this time at the base of your throat where your skin was much thinner - which he was very aware of. He wasn’t trying to make you bleed out, but you weren’t satisfied anymore. “Harder.”

He opened his eyes as his lips fell from your neck. You huffed, trying to yank him back against you. He stopped you, his big hand coming up to gently touch the side of your neck - the side he hadn’t marked up. You were slightly irritated as his pretty eyes stared at the mark on your throat. He had bitten down too hard - even though it was lighter than the others. Your skin was so fragile there, so sensitive. Now, it was broken and a red circle was forming around the area.

“Don’t stop.” You whispered softly, combing through his hair. It was slightly oilier than usual, tonight was his shower night. “Please, baby.”

“M’done.” He muttered back, eyes still locked on your neck. There was a drop of blood pooling to the surface. He gulped as he watched it emerge and begin to roll down your skin. “I hurt you.”

His grip on your head loosened and you were finally able to move, opting to look down at him. You relaxed your body, sitting all the way on his thighs now. Your fingers curled around his nape, eyes trying to find his but he wouldn’t stop his staring.

“M’not hurt.” You whisper back, trying your best to remain calm and not become a brat about not getting your way. Sometimes Harry just didn’t realize he was doing everything you wanted him to do. “Please, look at me.”

The shake of his head was faint, barely noticeable. If you hadn’t been looking, you would have missed it. Harry’s hands were hardly touching your body now. He had returned his hand back to your waist - but he wasn’t even gripping you like he always, always did. It worried you, mostly because you thought it was your fault. Was he not turned on anymore? Did he not want to do this? You could still feel him under you, hard as a rock - but that didn’t mean he wanted to do this anymore.

“You’re bleeding.. in all three spots.” He mumbled, his lips stuck in the shape of a frown.

Once again, you try your best to move his head up, but he doesn’t allow it. A whine slips past your lips as you put both hands on his neck, attempting to get his attention.

“I can make you feel better, yeah?” You suggested, one hand traveling down his chest. He grabbed your wrist just as you reached his navel. “Harry.”

“No.” He quickly shot your efforts down.

“You don’t.. want me?” The words came out in a soft whisper, almost inaudible.

Harry let out an unamused laugh. “You shouldn’t want me, baby. I.. you’re bleeding.”

You were annoyed by his constant complaining, so you decided to determine the outcome yourself. When you reached up to touch your throat, Harry shook his head. You felt a wetness coat two of your fingertips. When you pulled your hand back to look, you felt a lump begin to form in your throat.

“M’not touching you anymore.. not right now.” He said suddenly, making your heart drop to your gut.

“What? No! Harry.” You whined, quickly wiping your fingers on your shirt so you could touch his face. “Bubby, i need you, please.”

“Baby, no.”

Tears began forming in your eyes. “This isn’t fair! I want this. You didn’t do it on purpose!”

He shook his head and gripped your sides. “Go. M’not doing anything.”

That broke your heart - literally crushed your lungs. A breath came from your mouth and you slumped against him, his face in your chest as you lazily put your arms around his neck.

“Pretty please.” You mumbled out, trying your best to be as sweet as possible. “Love you so much.”

Harry huffed back. “I love you, darling, but M’not doing this right now.”

“Harry-“

“Give it up, baby. M’serious.”

“Fine!” You threw your arms down and pressed your hands on his shoulders to stand up. He tried to keep a hold of your waist but you furiously shoved his hands down. “You’re being mean for no reason!”

He didn’t like the tears rolling down your clearly angry face. “Baby-“

“No!” You yelled, fists clutched at your sides. “I didn’t interrupt you! You let me in! I didn’t do anything mean to you!”

“I never said you did!” He raised his voice right back at you, but you didn’t care.

Within seconds, you were fleeing his office and rushing up the stairs to the bedroom. Harry was supposed to give you his undivided attention - but today he chose to neglect that promise. He wasn’t working on anything that needed his full focus, so why was he acting that way? It wasn’t like he had never bit you before..

((I wrote this originally using a name for the female character, but I changed it! Excuse any errors if I left in the name anywhere!))

[tpwkwriter]

hiii so i have a request! Could you do one like still in harry's 1d days. So like y/n is louis sister and she has been friends with the band since the beginning and harry has been in love with her since he first laid eyes on her and all that. But he never told her because she always had a bf but those bfs would never treat her right like always ignoring her and flirting with other girls so harry kept this like journal where he wrote how in love he is with y/n and how he would treat her right, how he know everything about her all the little things and how no one could love her as much as he does. So then one day like during prince hair harry her and harry are sharing a hotel room with seperate beds (ofc haha, but because they have always been best friends) and y/n finds this journal and like reads all the things he has written and then she goes to him and is like "well, if i didnt know any better i would say mr styles has a crush on me" and he gets all nervous and says that it isnt just a crush and he is in love and that and then he asks "will you be my girlfriend. I cant' go another day of not kissing you, hugging you, touching you I cant stand you not being mine" and y/n finds it very sweet but she is very insecure and kind of rejects him in a nice way because she feel they will critisise her because they expect harry to be w a model and gorgeous girl and harry is tells her how beautiful she is and how he feel in love the moment they met and how it didnt matter what the world thought because no one can love her like he can and he know eveything about her so he asks again "will you let me be your boyfriend" and she finally agrees and then he holds her close and protectively and then y/n starts tearing up and says sorry because she was being silly and he says "dont be. Its not silly, baby. I'll be her to wipe every tear and to comfort you. Your heart is safe here, you are safe with me, my love" and then how they spend the first night together because well they share a hotel room and then the morning after harry saying how happy he is and how he has always dreamed about it and then they meet with the boys and tell em the news and they are all very happy and are like "about time" and yeah hope you understand it thank you again so much it would be great i feel its so cute! <3

Does he know?

OMGOMG THANK YOU FOR THISS!! the detail you put in and the image it painted in my head AHHH❤️

I’m so sorry this has taken so long!! I really wanted this to be perfect!! 🌷 but thank you for your patience It means the world x

Warnings: jealousy, mentions of toxic relationships, cussing, smutty themes if you squint, pent up emotions.

— — — — — — —

— early 2013 —

Harry’s fingers held a ballpoint pen between his fingers, the lined paper sat empty on the table adjacent to him.

There new album ‘midnight memories’ was due mid November of this year, he loved his job but these deadlines took the piss.

‘Fuck’ he whispered to himself, he didn’t realise the clock had gone over midnight.

The shared tourbus was at a halt for the night the rest of the four boys remained in there bunk and no one heard a peep from them through the rest of the night.

“Y’alright H?” Y/n said Peeling the curtain that separated the bunks to the lounging area of the bus, and pulling it back behind her.

“Sorry y/n, did i wake you?” He quietly asked, dropping his pen instantly.

He would be lying if he said he didn’t have a crush on y/n, she was also the youngest of the Tomlinson family so her and Harry grew up together at the same time and age, hitting each milestone and big birthdays together.

“No, no not at all” she waved, sitting on the sofa next to his.

“What y’doing awake still?” She asked, taking a sip of her water.

“Tryna get song ideas, getting absolutely nowhere” he said, crossing his arms back and leaning back on the cushions.

“What are you doing awake? He smirked.

“Can’t sleep, excited for tomorrow” she smiles.

“Haven’t seen you all on stage for a while” she added.

They sat and spoke for awhile, what y/n was oblivious of is how many ideas he was racking up watching her.

She reached her arm out to grab her water bottle, her wrist was exposed from her hoodie sleeve for a second, what Harry didn’t expect was to see an inky drawing.

“Is that a tattoo?” He asked.

“Oh this?” She askers pulling her hoodie up her arm.

“Yeah, me and Louis got matching a few days ago, a random spontaneous idea that popped into our heads” she laughed repressing the day her and her older brother got matching ‘28’ tats.

“It’s funny because ben, hasn’t even noticed it, and it’s like our 4th month together” y/n mentioned, a slight frown forming on her face.

Harry’s heart teared a tiny bit, she was still with this ‘Ben’ it was clear none of the boys got on with him, he wasn’t the bestest of boyfriend.

“Really?” He asked, eyes widening.

“Mmhmm, don’t know what to do about this whole Situation-ship thing”

“Well, do you love him?” He asked, fiddling with the hem of his band tee.

“I can’t say I do Harry” she sighed, “but there’s a part of me that feels bad” she added.

“Don’t feel bad, if it’s not meant to be, s’not meant to be”

All y/n wanted to do was scream out her attraction to him, something clicked in, the soft and gentle words he spoke, the way he still looked good at 1am after a busy day, the way he made a band tee look like piece of designer. Y/n wasn’t sure what happened.

Y/n soon enough found herself back in her bunk, trying to push down her sudden butterflies, hoping it’s just a 1am sleepy thought, the last thing she wants is to thirst over her brothers best friend.

When y/n and Harry exchanged there goodnights, he instantly got back to his paper.

‘Does he know’ he whispered.

‘Does he know’ he repeated.

‘Your secret tattoos?” He asked himself.

He instantly jotted these phrases to himself.

Harry tried to think to himself of the little things you do.

Maybe you could be his muse this time around?

—

It was 8:45am the next day the bus was off again at 5pm so for now they could relax.

Y/n believed she was alone on the bus, she thought the boys were out doing the coffee run, she thought wrong.

“But she doesn’t know who I am, and she doesn’t give a damn about me” she sang whole continuing to organise her suitcase on her bunk.

As the beats of ‘teenage dirtbag’ continue, she moves her body to beat and sing.

“Cause I’m just a teenage dirtbag baaby” she sung.

“Y/n you may be a Tomlinson doesn’t mean you can sing like one though” he interrupted, almost kicking the tourbus door open and walking over to her bunk with her Starbucks in hand.

“Heeeey, I’m a lovely singer, it should be me selling out O2” she said with pride.

“She got you there tommo” Niall piped in walking in.

“See” she giggled.

“Thank you for this lou” she dragged taking a sip of her iced coffee.

“No problemo, me and and the lads are heading to the studio in a bit y’ can come if you want?” Louis offered sitting on his bunk opposite to y/n’s.

“Yeah will do” she answered.

At this point all boys were back on the bus enjoying some quality time together, but all Harry could think of was the remaining lyrics.

‘The songs that you sing when your all alone?’ He thought to himself, that’s a keeper.

——beginning of where we are 2014——

In past year y/n and Harry had become closer than ever, it’s was a night at the MSG, the boys opted on a hotel instead of the bus, to Louis’ dismay y/n and Harry were up for sharing a hotel.

“Neither of you better be doing anything” Louis called the opposite of the hotel door.

“Fuck sake lou, you can come in” she laughed, laying her head back on the hotel bed frame.

The door clicks open to see a wet head louis, who was still clad in his joggers and ‘the who’ tee.

“You nearly ready Harry!” He called, pulling his phone out and glancing the time.

“Yeah man” he said emerging from the bathroom.

“Have fun tonight guys” she called out as they both met each other at the door. “I’ll be sure to watch some shitty livestream of you all prancing about on stage” she laughed.

“Thanks love” Louis said rolling his eyes.

“See you y/n don’t get too lonely without us” Harry smirked flashing her a wink while adjusting his head scarf which kept his unruly curls at bay.

“Bye boys” she called as they slowly walked off and headed to the arena.

They had been gone about an hour and y/n knew they wouldn’t be back till maybe after midnight.

She decided to set down and get ready to stay in her bed and have a relaxed night.

When unpacking her bags and digging to find her favourite pyjamas she was sure she packed. A large ‘thump’ was heard the other side of the room.

“Shit” she jumped.

A relieved smile, when it was something falling out of Harry’s suitcase.

She turned her head and spotted a brown, leather notebook that was lying on the carpet by his bags.

Once y/n had picked out her pjs for the evening, she walked over to the bed she picked out in the hotel room.

She placed them down by her pillows and was about to reach out for her phone by the charging port until something about this note book, caught her eye, ‘one and only’ was scribed into the leather with black ink.

She knows she shouldn’t, she knows that not hers, that’s Harry’s, that’s his property not y/n’s but there was something pulling her in a feeling she couldn’t push down.

A shaky breath left her mouth as her fingers reached out towards the book in front of her.

She peeled back the smooth cover:

23rd of February 2013

Ben doesn’t know how lucky he is, such a smart, beautiful, caring woman, how could he take her for granted??.

Y/n’a heart was running a Marathon.

“No” she said louder than she anticipated.

She flicked to the next page:

28th February 2013

‘All of us were at the studio this evening I couldn’t stop staring at y/n, I feel terrible knowing it’s my best friends sister, but she is wonderful’

Her mind was now matching her palpitating heart, a million thoughts were being processed at that moment.

He really thought the same the whole time?

She quickly flicked another.

3rd of March 2013

Write a couple of songs for midnight memories is it bad to say there all inspired by one person.

If she was mine she wouldn’t be ignored or treated terribly, I hope Louis talks to her about this Ben.

Y/n did agree with this statement getting rid of Ben was the best thing she’s done.

But she didn’t know Harry was the one with a crush.

She couldn’t believe her eyes, he really felt the same? He really did like her? She was almost hyperventilating.

10th of March 2013

I’ve noticed when y/n gets anxious she plays with the ends of her hair, I wish I could just scoop her into my arms and tell her it’s going to be okay.

Ben is finally out the picture, hopefully she can be with someone who knows her self worth.

Her heart is beaming, butterflies fill each side of her tummy, her mind still feeling a little delusional and still very much in disbelief.

Maybe this was her sign to take there friendship another level up.

She slammed the cover over the paper and decided if she’d read anymore she’d become a crimson red mess.

She gently tucked it into the suitcase of where it fell and tried to go on as normal.

She decided to wait up for Harry and see what she could do about this, she couldn’t hide this any longer she wish she knew sooner about his little crush.

It was just past midnight and she heard the hotel room key click in approval.

A tired looking Harry appears.

“Y’alright” she quietly asked.

“Mmm” he hummed shutting the door behind him.

Y/n move to one side of her bed, and patted the empty space beside her, inviting him to join.

Wether it was just his sleepy mind, but he took no time and accepted her invitation.

Y/n let him adjust to the light, and get comfortable not wanting to overload him already.

“Y’okay” he asked, noticing her thinking face.

“Yeah” she smiled.

“Well if I didn’t know any better, than I think that you mr styles have a teeny crush” she said, a breathy laugh leaving her mouth.

His eyes widened, now it it was his time to go red.

“Wha-“ he nervously laughed.

“I guess y’right” he said looking straight ahead at the blank wall.

“Y/n, m’gonna be honest”

“I’m in love with you”

Y/n’s heart pounded inside her chest, this is real? This was real life, he admitted.

“Harry” she blushed.

“And I know, it’s probably weird, we’ve been friends for 4 years now and on a random night , I’m now saying this but, seeing you keep hurting yourself on these boys that don’t understand you, it hurts”

“Harry-“ her cheeks becoming a strawberry colour.

“Be my girlfriend?” Harry blurted.

Y/n’s ears almost burned at the question, Someone she actually had interest in liked her back? And wanted to be with her? She felt like. Lovesick teenager again.

She wanted this, more than ever.

But Louis.

Realistically there was nothing wrong with it, they were the same age, and both wanted it.

“I can’t stand another day, not touching you, not hugging you, not wiping your tears away” he added, which caused y/n’s thought process to halt.

“Harry, y’too good for me” she started, a glossy layer had formed over her eyes.

“Y’need someone better, your options are so big” she said head almost dropping to her lap.

“Hey” he said taking using his index finger and thumb to guide her chin up.

“What I’ve learnt is your the one I want, haven’t been able to settle because of you y/n”

“Be mine?” He asked once again leaning his forehead on hers using his free hand to wipe the tears away.

“Please” he whispered, this is all he’s wanted.

Worried that her words would fail her at that moment all she could do was frantically nod.

“Yeah?” He smiles, there noses basically touching at this point.

“Words baby, need y’words” he reminded.

“Yeah, yes harry yes” she smiled, tears still manage to cascade her cheeks.

“Thank fuck” he breathed, now hesitating to wrap his arm around the girl, oh how he’s longed to do that.

The girl crashes into his touch, not taking her time either.

“Your okay, y’safe in my arms love” he whispered into her hair, pressing his long awaited kisses.

— the following morning —

Both Harry and y/n were getting ready to meet the rest of the lads on the bus, which was round the back of the hotel.

“How are we gonna tell them?” Harry asked getting the rest of his stuff.

“They’ll understand, Louis will be unsure but he’s my brother he can’t hate me forever” she laughed.

She pressed a kiss to his cheek, and they made there way to the boys.

“Guys we have something to tell you all” y/n began.

— — — — —

[danni-fangirldoodles]

Music for a sushi restaurant

[fallingsolonely]

The Underground • Part 1

Warning

This is a smutty one-shot that contains themes of infidelity and light BDSM.

Hope you enjoy! ♡

Word count - Part 1 - 6.3k

~~~

"Jess, I'm starting to second guess this" I whisper to my friend as she attempts to pick a lock that might set off every alarm in the building.

We were lucky enough that there isnt security over here.

"Mars, we are doing this for you. You said you were looking for an adventure and it just so happens that this is one of the hottest parties of the year"

The lock in the door clicks and she turns to look at me.

"Score!" She exclaims with delight, pulling the heavy door open.

"I've heard rumors about the families who throw these parties, Jess. Do you really want to be found dead in the river?" She laughed and pulled me into a hallway.

Suddenly the muffled thumping of the music is much louder.

"Well, at least it's an adventure" She smiled and takes one of the masks I am holding.

"Besides, we both look like we own half of England. No one will know" She puts the mask over her face.

It covered most of her face, it was gorgeous. It was black with navy blue jewels.

I thought the feather was a bit much, but Jess has always had a flair for the dramatic.

"Come on, Mars, put on your mask and have fun. You need this" She took the mask from my hands and put it on my face.

"Just pretend that this is your life. Walk around like you have 20 million in your bank account" She took my hands and smiled.

"Come on, let's go find the fun" She laughed and pulled me down the hallway.

We found the stairwell and Jess pulled me all the way until we found the doors leading to where the party is.

It is hard to ignore the eyes as we made our way there.

People scattered around the halls in fancy dresses, wearing masks that only showed their piercing eyes or perfectly painted lips.

It's intimidating as hell.

I need a drink.

When we get into the main hall of the party, it is stunning.

I have no idea how we managed to get in.

We were in the heart of the city in one of the largest hotels in England. They shut this place down for a week just to get ready for this party.

"I'm going to find the bar" I say to Jess. She nods at me, but her eyes are checking out something else.

Someone else.

"Time to get me a rich man" She smiles at me.

"Text me if you need me, alright Mars?" She squeezed my hand and then picked herself up and walked towards a man in a very expensive looking suit.

I want to have fun, I do. But worry and doubt floods my brain.

Am I really going to do this?

I sigh and attempt to pick myself up the way Jess had done.

Just, find the bar, have a drink. You will be fine.

I can feel the eyes on me as I walk past people, all of them dressed in some of the most luxurious dresses and suits I have ever seen.

And here I am wearing my bridesmaid dress from my sister's wedding.

I'm like a naked eye sore.

I think this is what my therapist meant by negative talk.

I make my way to the bar that has been set up.

It's huge, set up in a perfect square with bar stools around all of it.

Lucky for me, there's a spot open. I quickly make my way to it and sit down.

"Vodka, straight" I say to the man behind the bar. Even the bar tenders are dressed to extravagance.

Without a question, 3 shots are placed in front of me.

God knows I'm going to need it. I take one of them, drowning it.

I quickly do the same with the second, I go to grab the third but before I can, someone takes it.

"Hey" I turn to the one who took it, he smiles and takes the stool next to me.

"Don't 'Hey' me, darling. You aren't paying for it" He said, a grin on his face.

Men.

He waves at the one of the bar tenders and more shots are put in front of me.

"See, no need for the fuss" He takes one of them and easily takes it.

I look over him a bit more after he's settled next to me.

Half his face is covered by a stunning gold and black mask.

But his eyes are perfectly visible.

They are bright green and I can see the glittery eyeshadow around his eyes, his lips are also painted in a clear sparkly gloss.

I complain about men a lot, but Jesus, some of them are gorgeous.

"Do I have something on my face, Darling?" He smiles at the stupid joke he makes.

I can feel the warmth of the vodka in my blood and I laugh.

He orders a cocktail for each of us.

"How are you enjoying the party, Love?" He stirs the drink and looks over me.

"It's quite stunning really, I just got here so, drinks and then some fun"

He smiles and continues to stir his drink.

"Funny, the doors closed a little over an hour ago"

I choke a little on the drink and set it down. Trying to keep my cool.

Am I that obvious that I don't belong here?

"What's your name, sweetheart?" He asks, he takes a sip from his drink and sets it down. His eyes not leaving me for a second.

I freeze for a moment, I definitely shouldn't use my real name.

"E-Emma" I stumble on it a little bit.

He looks down at his drink, his fingers playing with the toothpick in the glass.

I glance over the fancy rings he's wearing and then quickly look at him.

His little smile turns into a smirk.

"Alright, Emma" The emphasis on Emma makes my skin crawl.

How he knows, I have no idea.

God, I hope Jess is okay.

"It may seem like a lot of people, but it really isn't. You should see the parties in Rome" He takes one of the shots and dumps it into his cocktail.

I take another shot, needing more alcohol in my system.

I'm trying, very hard not to freak out.

Every alarm and red light is going off in my brain.

Oh my God, I'm going to get murdered.

"Not many get invited to parties like this, how did you manage. Not to say you aren't a very sexy woman" His smile is intoxicating.

Maybe it's the alcohol hitting me.

Suddenly, a light bulb goes off in my head.

"My uncle, Jack Carlton-"

God, what a bullshit lie.

I read an article about him a week ago, something about another museum being opened up in North London.

"He got me in" I pick up the drink he got me and take another sip.

I try to sound confident in my answer, but my teeth are knawing on my lip.

"You're apart of the Carlton family?" I nod my head and smile at him.

"What about you, Mr. Fancy Suit? You seem so interested in my life, but what about you"

As the liquor takes over, I reach out and poke his chest.

He grabs my hand, I go to pull it away but he holds my hand up.

"Are you married, darling?"

Fuck.

I was going to take it off, but it was the fanciest peice of jewelry I owned.

I stay quiet, letting him hold my hand and eye the ring on my finger.

"Are they here with you?" He smiles at me and more gently places his hand in my lap.

His fingers just barely brush over my thigh, and they tense.

I shake my head.

Trying to wish away the pulsing I feel from just his fingertips.

He laughed and brought his hand to my cheek. His fingers trace along my jaw.

"I can't say I blame you, honey. Considering the family you're from, I'd be pretty fuckin' disappointed with that ring as well"

His thumb went over my bottom lip.

"Makes me think that this pretty lady, isn't satisfied" His fingers come down, tracing the vein in my neck and then pulling his hand away.

His smile never falters. Not even once.

He waves to the tender for more drinks and then looks back at me.

"What is it sweetheart, boredom? Spouse not fun enough to join you?" He wonders, he takes the cherry from his drink and I watch as he pops it between his glittery lips.

He reads me easily and it drives me fucking insane.

I quickly chug the rest of my drink and pull the new one towards me.

"Let me guess, love" He leans closer to me and I want to pull back but he smells divine.

"They don't know you're here" His unwavering smiles twists into a wicked smirk.

I shiver when his breath hits my skin.

"No, he doesn't" I answer him, my voice almost cracking.

Fear, anxiety and a hint of excitement floods me.

"Why is that, Emma?"

Again, he emphasizes the name.

"I-I-" I freeze for a moment, mixed emotions raging through my stomach.

"I don't know"

"Sure you do" He places his hand on my knee, but his eyes don't leave mine.

"Tell me, Emma, what are you looking for?"

I glance down at the hand on my leg, his hands are large, warm. I want to tighten my legs together but I know he'll notice.

"Don't be shy, sweetheart" He chuckles.

A deep part of my subconscious pictures taking his hand and raising it higher. It already felt like more attention than I've been getting for the last six months.

This time he leans right into me, his lips at my ear.

"Trust me, I'm really good at keeping secrets"

The mystery man pulls back, but his hand still rests on my knee.

Am I really about to tell this stranger about my martial problems?

Fuck it, why not? I'm practically drunk. I hope this is something I don't remember in the morning.

"He's boring. He wants kids, the picket fence life" I shake my head, reaching for another drink.

"I don't, I want to be adventurous, have fun. We had plans to travel the world together, but after we got married. It just got, plain"

Suddenly, I can't stop talking.

All of this weight I carry, without telling almost anyone about it, I dump onto this stranger in the middle of a million dollar party I shouldn't even be at.

But God, does it feel good.

As nerve racking as it is, I haven't done something like this in a long time.

"God, don't even get me started on the sex" I shake my head and laugh.

"It's the same thing every time. Don't get me wrong, we still have sex. But would it kill him to try something new? I'm sick of it. I tried talking to him about it and even bought some stuff for us to try and spice things up. Nothing, he gives me nothing. Offended that I feel the need to add a toy into the mix. God, I don't think I've had an orgasm in over a year-"

I realize what I'm talking about and quickly stop myself by chugging yet another cocktail.

"No wonder you're so tense, darling"

This time, my legs do tighten when he squeezes my knee.

"A man that cannot please or satisfy you, is not a man at all" He raises his hand up my leg and then brings it up under my chin.

"My poor little darling, no woman should be deprived of pleasure" He pulls me closer to his face.

"I live for pleasure" He outlines my lips and I try very hard not to let my heart jump out of my chest.

He's so forward, insanely flirtatious and I don't know what to make of it.

I don't want him to stop. I haven't felt this good in so long. Just his fingertips felt like little shocks against my skin.

I came here with unfaithful intentions. As terrible as it sounds. I hated the way I felt about my husband, but I was tired of living this facade. I'm not happy anymore.

I needed something else. I needed satisfaction. I craved it.

"Come, darling. Dance with me"

I'm taken from my trance by the mystery man.

He smiles, this time wide enough that I can see his perfectly white teeth and the dimples on his cheeks.

He stands up from the stool and takes my hand. He pulls me from my seat and towards the front of the lobby where a stage had been set up.

The music is live and in front of the stage is a dance floor.

It felt like an after party for the Met Gala. It's insane.

Like he's prince, people moved as we came by.

He placed his hands on my hips and pulled me close to him.

His hands felt so fucking good on my body.

I wanted more.

He brought his lips up to my ear again and my body melted.

The alcohol, him, the way he moved my hips to the beat of the drums.

I'm burning up.

"This could be the start of a very interesting friendship, my darling"

I held onto his shoulders tightly, trying to stay in time with the way he swayed me around.

"But, I am not a man who appreciates being lied to" He squeezes my hips hard.

"So how about you, be a good girl, and tell me your name?"

I bite my lip until it's almost bleeding.

"I-I'm-" He shushed me.

"Let's start over, princess. Tell me your name" He demands quietly into my ear.

But it's so hard to focus on him with the way his hands firmly held onto my hips.

"Mars" I say softly, my hands moving up into his hair.

"Hm, what a stunning name you have" His lips grace my jaw only for a moment before he pulls back and presses his forehead against my own.

"Is this alright with you, my love? I have no intentions of trying to make you uncomfortable" He looks at me, his flirtatious demeanor turns more serious.

I nod, my ability to speak is gone.

I'm not uncomfortable in anyway, the moment he came up to me I felt like I was in a trance. His eyes were supernatural.

How could I say no to this?

Even with the mask it's easy to tell how handsome this guy is.

"What's your name?" I ask, looking into his gorgeous eyes.

He smiles but doesn't answer my question.

"Mars, my love, you don't have to worry about me" He raises one of his hands until its on the back of my neck.

I can feel the eyes watching us, but my fear is gone.

I'm lost in this, in this mysterious man.

I don't want this moment to end.

We weren't slow dancing, the music is to upbeat for that but the way he made me move with him is methodical and so fucking sexy.

He held on tight. One hand on my hip and the other on the back of my neck. Our foreheads were pushed together and his eyes were staring into my own.

It felt like we were the only people in the room.

"Hm, I'd fuck you right here if it were that kind of party" His lips were dangerously

close to my own.

My eyes went wide and he just smiled innocently.

"Those are the fun kind of parties" He smiled even wider.

"These are just the boring ones, keep up appearances"

This is definitely not boring. I feel like I'm going to faint.

"Exclusive parties" He whispered, his fingertips dug into my hips and my knees buckled.

"Definitely not one you can sneak your way into" He bit his lip and then smirked.

"Hm, I like you, Mars" He moved even closer, his cheek against my own.

"If you're looking for something, I have a few things I can show you" He moved his hand from the back of my neck and slid it along my arm until he had my hand in his.

He pulled it back and laced our fingers together. He played with the ring on my finger.

"Not sure your husband would appreciate it" He moved his lips along my jaw until our faces were lined up again.

"Please" I say softly, not knowing how to speak but desperately wanting whatever this man wanted to show me.

"Please what, my love?" He asked softly.

He held my hand tightly and then suddenly spun me around and pulled my back against his chest.

He let go of my hand and placed his back on my hip. He held me tight to him. I laid my head on his shoulder and took a deep breath.

"Show me" I whisper, spinning back around to face him.

I run my fingers up into his hair. I pulled his face as close as I could without kissing him.

But fuck, did I ever want too.

His lips were so tasty looking. Sparkling with the gloss he was wearing.

The makeup just making him even more sexy.

"Find me, before you leave, princess. I'll have something for you" He kissed me for a fucking second and bit my lip.

Suddenly he pulled back from me and turned around.

Leaving me there, breathless.

I was frozen in place. My head is spinning and I feel like I'm going to pass out.

Holy shit.

"Mars?" Jess finds me, still reeling in the middle of the dance floor.

She comes up to me and places her hands on my shoulders.

I shake myself from the trance and look at Jess and smile.

"Holy shit" I finally say it out loud.

"Holy shit is right, babe" She laughs and starts to dance with me.

All I can think about is that man.

"This is the best fucking thing we've ever done" I say to her and she smiles at me.

"I told you, miss 'I think this is a bad idea'" I smile and hug her, spinning her around with me.

"I have never felt so free!"

Both of us are laughing now.

"I definitely noticed that" She giggles and pulls back from me.

"You basically had the whole party watching you two" She whispers in my ear.

My cheeks go hot and Jess smirks.

"Jess, fuck. He's the sexiest man I've ever met in my entire life" I grab her shoulders and shake her a little bit.

"Seems like a lot of women here think the same. Could see them starring daggers at you with the way you were dancing with him" She smiled even more.

"What's his name?" She wondered.

I stop suddenly, realizing he never told me.

Fuck I wish I knew it.

Because I want to dream of him, I want to scream it.

"He never told me, he just told me to find him before I leave"

I look around, trying to see if I can spot him, but nothing.

"Well, we are going to have to find this man, aren't we?" She poked me playfully.

"First, let's enjoy this party some more" She laughed and began to dance again.

I can't describe the way I'm feeling. I haven't felt this amazing in so long.

My life up until this point just felt like time was passing me by and I was going nowhere.

The flame of my marriage has burnt out, on my end. I felt empty, lonely and bored.

I was so desperate to find something, anything to make me feel this way.

I wanted to be excited again. I wanted to have fun. I didn't want to settle down, I didn't want to have kids.

I want to explore, I want to be dangerous.

"Okay, so tall, black suit, and a gold plated mask?" I nod, walking around.

I am desperate to find this man.

"Let's split up" Jess says to me, I agree and she speeds off.

It feels like I look everywhere, I go back to the bar and search all around it. I even ask the bartenders if they have seen him. But nothing.

I feel like a lost puppy looking for it's owner. I walk around the entire lobby twice. But I don't want to give up. I didn't even get a

name.

If I stop searching, I'll never find him again.

Two more times I walk around, but he's a ghost.

Smoke, disappeared.

Did he leave?

I retrace every step I took with him and I find nothing. Not a trace of the man who took my breath away.

I sigh, making my way to the door where Jess and I are supposed to meet.

I see her standing there and I pray she had better luck than me.

But as I come up to her, she shakes her head.

"Nothing?" I ask, she shakes her head and places her hand on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, babe" I turn around and lean against the door.

"It's alright" I say, tilting my head back.

"It's probably a stupid idea anyways"

But my heart shatters just a bit.

He's unforgettable. Those eyes are burned into my brain.

"We could try one more time?" She suggests, but I shake my head.

"I walked around this place a million times. He's gone"

I close my eyes and bring myself to the moment we shared on the dance floor.

He's amazing. Unreal.

"I'm sorry, hun" She's says sadly.

"How about, we go get an uber and go to that little diner we love?" I open my eyes and smile at her.

"I could really use a milkshake right now" I say, nodding my head.

"Okay, I'm gonna go out and get us an Uber" She opens the door.

"I'm just gonna wait for a few minutes, I'll meet you out there" I reassure. She kisses my cheek and smiles at me before she leaves.

I look out into the crowd of people throughout the lobby, but I see nothing.

I close my eyes again and breathe. I take in the night and smile to myself.

No matter how I feel at the moment, tonight was still the best night of my life. I snuck into the party of the year and met the most intoxicating man I'll ever meet.

I pictured his lips in my head, the way they were perfectly painted. I thought about the brief taste of them and the way his teeth sunk into my lip.

I'm whipped by a man who's name I didn't even know.

I imagine all the possibilities of what he could have possibly showed me.

I think about the words he said to me that made my thighs slick.

He gave me a taste of the drug and I am hooked.

A high I may never be able to reach again.

I sigh again and open my eyes. Forcing myself back into the harshness of reality.

"Not going to leave without finding me, are you, princess?" I jump almost right out of my heels and look next to me.

And there he is.

Just standing next to me like he's been there all night.

He smiles at me.

"I-Ive been looking everywhere for you" I whisper, making him smile.

"Hm, I know" He licks his lips and then pulls something out of his jacket. He picks up my hand and presses his lips to it.

"I hope to see you soon. And, how about this stays between us, sweetheart" He hands an envelope to me and just as fast as he's there, he's gone again.

I looked down at the envelope he gave to me. It's completely blank on the outside.

I stare at it, wondering what could possibly be in it.

I'm tempted to open it, but I don't. I hold it tightly in my hand and look over the party once more.

This time, I do see him. Hes looking right at me with that smile on his face.

He holds up his glass to me and then takes a sip before turning around.

This man is going to be the death of me.

________

It's been 2 weeks since me and Jess snuck into that party. A party that has completely changed my life.

I didn't tell Jess about the envelope he gave to me.

I opened it as soon as I got home. All that was on it was an address and a date.

Today's date.

The address was for a club, in one of the richest places in London.

In an amazing stroke of luck, Daniel is working late tonight. So it will be easier to get ready.

I had really no idea what this club was going to be.

But God, I was dying of excitement.

I felt like a teenager going to their prom.

This time, I bought something online to wear tonight.

Perhaps, having emergency money for when I want to run away, should have been a red flag for this marriage.

It's not like Daniel was an awful man. Which made things so much worse. I know he loved me deeply, but he's so bland and unaware of the way he speaks.

Everyday is the same, the sex is always the same. It feels like we are in two different worlds.

I look in the mirror, carefully painting my lips red.

I want to feel bad about what I'm doing, but I don't. Not anymore.

All I could think about was this man.

To think that Daniel almost actually got me to come when we had sex the other night and it wasn't even him.

I just imagined him, those bright green eyes and sparkling pink lips.

I look myself over in the mirror, I look fucking good.

I bought a dress online and it looked even better on than it did online.

A black skin tight dress with a see through corset top. It revealed quite a bit, but I loved it.

I don't feel self conscious, I feel like a bad bitch. I run my fingers through my hair and smile at myself.

Tonight, is going to be so much fun.

I couldn't get there fast enough. I sat in the back of the taxi, anxiously watching out the window. I felt confident and sexy, but I'm nervous.

What if this man doesn't even remember me?

What did I agree to?

I play with the end of the dress and watch as the cab pulls up to a stunning club, a crowd of people outside waiting to get in.

I stare for a moment, in awe of it.

In awe of everything. I can feel the adrenaline kick in.

I hastily make my way out the taxi and brush myself off.

I pull out the envelope and walk to the front of the line, ignoring the glares from people waiting in line.

Part of me just wants to make sure I'm in the right place.

"This is the right address?" I ask, handing over the peice of paper to the bouncer.

He looked it over and then at me. He looked me up and down and then opened the bar for me, just allowing me to walk right inside.

Well, alright then. A free ticket away from that God awful line, definitely not complaining.

I make my way into the club. The music is pounding and even though this is still one of the most high-class neighborhoods in all of London, this wasnt nearly as fancy as the masquerade I snuck into.

It was much darker, lights flashing everywhere, people dancing like no one is around.

I smiled, thinking about the dance I shared with the man.

Thinking about the words he said to me as we did. Telling me he would have fucked me right there if he could.

First stop, the bar.

I don't know how I'm going to find him in here.

Though, he somehow manages to find me.

At the masquerade, I had looked around a stupid amount of times and couldn't spot him.

Like he was playing a game with me.

Like he watched every step I took and did the opposite.

I wanted to play the same game with him, but I had a feeling I wasn't the one with the power here.

I took a seat at the bar and got myself a round of shots.

I down two of them before spinning in my stool to look around at the club and the people dancing.

I take it all in, enjoying it. I'm sure Jess would have loved this.

But I wanted it to myself. I wanted this secret to myself.

I wanted to feel powerful.

It was invigorating.

I turn back around and take the third shot.

Already, the alcohol clings to me and I feel warm. Lightheaded, but in a good way.

"Hm, I was hoping to see you here, darling"

His voice is directly behind me and I jump.

God, he needs to stop that.

I spin around and look up at him.

This time, he isn't wearing a mask.

Holy fuck.

He's stunning.

"Todd, give us another round" He said, waving to the bar tender behind the counter.

He looks down at me and he smiles.

"I like this view darling" He leans and whispers in my ear.

"Would be even better on your knees" I shiver and bite my lip.

He sits next to me and easily takes a shot.

Fuck its hot.

He is so hot, I feel like I'm sweating.

His lips are painted a muted pink and his eyes are done a sparkly gold.

His cheeks are highlighted and it just defines his gorgeous face even more.

I don't know what it is about guys and makeup, but mother of God.

"My lovely Mars, how does it feel not having to sneak in?" He asks, looking at me with a smirk.

My face goes red and I drown the question with another shot.

He remembered my name.

"Not as dangerous" I say, looking at him and smiling playfully.

"The night is young, my love. Plenty of time for that"

I refrain from biting my lip. I don't want to look so desperate but it's so hard.

It's so hard not to just stare at him.

He's a walking piece of art.

"Besides, honey. This isn't the party I invited you to" He says, sipping from a glass.

I look at him, confused.

"What do you mean?" I wonder.

God, that smirk is mesmerizing.

"This, this is just a club, beautiful"

I'm brought back to the night of the masquerade when he places his hand on my leg.

This time, his skin is directly on mine and I can't hide the heat of my skin.

"Remember how I told you about those, exclusive parties?"

His hand slides higher until he reaches the hem of my dress. His fingers running along it.

I do bite my lip this time and I nod.

I can't think with his hand where it is.

"Want to take a walk with me, baby?" I take a deep breathe when his hand grips the inside of my thigh.

I nod again.

He squeezes harder and smiles at me. He stands up and takes my hand, pulling me through the crowd of people.

He takes me to the back of the club and through a locked door.

It's very dimly lit and just in front of us is a flight of stairs leading to another door.

Before he leads me down them, he grabs my hips and pushes me against the wall.

He leans his forehead against mine and brings one of his hands to my chin.

"Now, my love. Since this your first time, this is more of an introduction" He smiles again.

"Just a little peak into what I could bring into your life" He wraps his hand around my throat and lightly kisses me.

"But, when I say this is exclusive. I mean it. The only way people get into this, is an invitation by me. Or, my friend Ruby. Who you will meet, in time" He kisses me again.

I can feel my heart beating like it's about to come out of my chest.

"You are never allowed to bring anyone here, or tell anyone about this. Do you understand me, sweetheart?"

His lips are practically against my own, I can feel his breath. I can taste it.

I can't find words. So I nod again.

He tightens his grip on my neck and bites my lip.

"Words, Mars" His tone is calm, but demanding.

"I-I understand"

I try not to melt into a puddle when he kisses me for a third time.

He pulls back just as it's about to heat up.

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"Taking a lot in me to not fuck you right here"

He opens his eyes and smiles wide.

He pulls back from me and takes my hand again, leading me down the steps and to the door.

He pulls a key out and unlocks it, opening it up and leading me through it.

I didn't know what to expect, but Jesus Christ.

Jesus, is definitely not coming through those doors.

When the door closes behind us, it's like the club above us doesn't exist. I can't here the pounding music at all.

Instead, the music is a lot more mellow. It's sexy.

The first thing that catches my eye is the small stage. On it, is a stripper pole.

And a stripper, a gorgeous one at that.

She has almost white hair and is just gliding around the pole with an elegance.

I'm so entranced by her that it takes me a second to notice the two cages on each side of the stage. Both of them have people in it.

In one, is a man. He's on his knees with a gag in his mouth and his hands behind his back. He seems to be just as entranced by the woman on stage as I am.

In the other, is a girl in the exact position as the man.

None of them even react to us coming in.

In front of the stage are two love seats.

One of them is occupied by a couple.

I bite my lip as my eyes glance between what is going on.

I can see the back of a man's head and on his lap is another stunning looking girl.

It's not rough, it's almost sensual the way she is riding him.

This girl, does look up when we walk in. She looks directly at me and smiles. Her hand gripping the man's hair.

Holy shit.

"Come on, sweetheart"

The man, who's name is still unknown to me, tugs my hand and pulls me away from the main room into a long hallway.

Every few feet there is a door. Some are closed, some are open.

I glance into the open ones.

The first one we pass is just a simple room, with a large bed and at the end of it is a chair, for someone to watch.

Most of the open rooms are empty, but one of them has three people in it. Two men and a woman.

I only get a peak but the only thing in the room is a table, which on of the men seems to be strapped onto.

I get pulled past before I can see really what they are doing.

I'm lead all the way to the end of the hall, to another door. He opens it and pulls me in, shutting the door behind us.

This room, is pretty huge.

Against one wall, is a gorgeous king sized bed. On the roof above it, is a giant mirror. Giving the perfect view of the bed.

Hung on the walls is an assortment of things I have never seen, as well as toys, handcuffs and vibrators. There's strapons, a shelf solely just for plugs.

There's so much, I feel dizzy just looking at it. I can't imagine what's going in the other rooms.

"Welcome to The Underground, Sunshine" He turns to me and smiles.

He places a hand on my hip and the other around my neck.

He pulls me close to him.

"A place to explore anything your heart desires" He runs his fingers through my hair.

"It's a little overwhelming" I admit, taking a deep breath.

"You really have no experience with stuff like this, hun?"

I shake my head a little.

He pulls me even closer.

"I will gladly be your guide" He brushes my lips, his arm wrapped around my waist and holding me close to him.

"That is, if you want me to. This definitely isn't a place for everyone" He moves his lips along my jaw and I feel like I'm going to fall over.

I wanted to do this, so badly.

But I didn't even know this guy's name.

I have no idea what I'm getting myself into.

As wild as I may have been as a teenager, never anything to the extent of this.

"If you think this isn't something you want to get yourself into, you don't have to, darling" He chuckled a little and pulled back to look at me.

"I'm not holding you here. Don't feel pressured to stay if you aren't interested" He says seriously, tightening his hold around me.

"Just wanted to show you that there are other worlds out there for you, my love. Yours to explore and discover"

The sweetness in his voice is fucking heart melting.

"This is just a little slice of mine" He smiled at me and bit his lip.

"If you'd like a peice of it, just say the word"

I looked around and then at the man in front of me.

I've been looking for almost a year to find something, anything. I tried finding feelings for my husband again and living the life he wanted.

But there was nothing. No matter how hard I tried, nothing seemed good enough.

Not until I met this mysterious man in front of me.

End of Part 1.

[avalentina]

Harry Styles Masterlist!

Code Reminder:

❤️‍🔥 SMUT ❤️‍🔥

🧸 FLUFF 🧸

🎬 ANGST 🎬

🧨 HEADCANNON 🧨

☔ TEAR-JERKER ☔

The Wrong Stick 🧸 - you attempt to give Harry a present, but it gets a little confusing when you give him the wrong one. (Allusions to sex, alcohol use, drug use, and lots of swearing) 850 words!

The Shower Incident ❤️‍🔥🧸 - a lazy day with Harry turns steamy when he catches you dancing to his songs in the shower. (SMUT, bit of a breeding kink) 450 words!

A Family That Just Can't Be ☔ - in which Harry and Y/N are in a relationship, trying for a family when they get some sad and unexpected news. 596 words

The Gift 🧸 - kind of part 2 to A Family That Just Can't Be, in which Harry convinces you it's worth it to try IVF. 451 words

Valentine 🧸 - in which singer!reader announces she's joining LOT via Instagram Live, and boyfriend!harry fails at Instagram (AGAIN)! 895 Words

Satellite: A Harry Styles Song Fic 🧸❤️‍🔥🎬 - In which Harry and Y/N fall in love again after a chance encounter brings them back together. -check out the sneaky! 27,854 Words

Inspiration Post?

S.S.I.B.H.S.S {Short Stories Inspired By Harry Styles (and One Direction) Songs} In which I tell little mini Harry Styles and You stories. Range from 200 - 2,000 words

SEND IN YOUR FAVORITE SONG AND THE NAME OF YOUR CHARACTER!

Sign of the Times 🎬☔ - Harry Styles x Ava 😍 (Teehee) @avalentina 483 Words

Something I've Been Waiting For ☔ - Eddie (HS) x You 303 Words

WHO'S NEXT?

Still Not Over It 🧸❤️‍🔥☔ - in which love on tour has ended and you're still not over it (also includes a few rambles from yours truly) 307 Words

The Kindest Team Guy (TKTG) 🧸❤️‍🔥🎬☔ - in which NavySeal!Harry falls for MilitaryBratHacker!Y/N who just needs him for his military id, until she starts catching feelings too

Part 1

Teaser!

The Princess's Lover (TPL) 🧸❤️‍🔥☔ - in which Noble!Harry is courting with Virgin!Princess!Y/N, a sweet and cute coming of age tale.

Zero: Enchanted (The Prequel)

[lets-talk-spirituality]

Will you do tpwk analysis it's the most controversial one lol

Cleaning out some of my drafts because that’s the mood I’m in esta mañana! Is it controversial? Doesn’t feel that way to me!

Maybe we can, Find a place to feel good

And we can treat people with kindness, Find a place to feel good

This line always reminds me “there’s a place for us, somewhere a place for us” (someday from west side story). Maybe we can means he’s not sure if we can but he’s hopeful, wanting to find a place to feel good is important to him, implying he hasn’t found a place where he feels good and where people are treated with kindness

I got a good feeling, I'm just takin' it all in, Floating up and dreamin', Droppin' into the deep end

Got a good feeling implies some level of intuition or instinct, and that he’s just riding the waves as they come, dreaming (a big theme always) “she lives in day dreams with me” floating as in moving up towards the sky where sunflower is “hung up high in the gallery”

And if we're here long enough, They'll sing a song for us (ah-ah-ah-ah)

To me this is him saying to his person to stay here long enough, to hold on, to wait. There have been continual references to Harry and someone he’s connected to feeling immense pain and he’s saying if we hold on, things will improve, always encouraging them to hold on and things will get better “you can see the world, following the seasons everywhere you go”

And we'll belong

What he wants for himself and for his person, we’ll belong “we belong to light, we belong to each other” (we belong, pat benatar). Harry doesn’t feel like he and someone else belong, he doesn’t feel like he and a lot of people belong, but the use of the word will implies he thinks in the future that can change

Giving second chances, I don't need all the answers

He’s admitting that there are things he doesn’t know “there’s things we’ll never know” (fine line) but that he doesn’t need to know everything to feel good, he’s no longer “worried about where you are, or who you will go home to”

Feeling good in my skin, I just keep on dancin'

He’s saying he’s gonna just keep having as good a time as he can, “kids in the kitchen listen to dance hall” I think dancing represents freedom of play to him, I think he gets in touch with his inner child when he dances

And if we're here long enough, We'll see it's all for us

To me he’s saying to his person, look at it all, this world, this music, this story, the world is our oyster, this is all for us, all for you, if you hold out you’ll see things differently, maturing is a beautiful thing in the way your understanding grows and changes

And it's just another day (and it's just another day)

Even magical people have ordinary days

And if our friends all pass away (ah-ah, ah-ah)

This is morbid randomly out of the blue, but Harry has lost people to suicide in his life. Some maybe to drugs. He lost his stepdad. I think he’s dealt with a lot of loss and he’s had to just keep going.

It's okay (it's okay, it's okay, it's okay)

But it’s okay because we can just make it through this rough time

All we ever want is automatic all the time. All we ever want is auto all of the time

Harry has this theme of feeling robotic (satellite music video) but also “tea with cyborgs” a real disconnect from our own humanity, but he’s saying he recognizes how things take time sometimes. We aren’t robots, we’re humans and part of being human is not having all the answers and being patient, and hoping things get better, he’s letting go of a lot of his need for control

Ultimately I feel like this is a song trying to encourage people that it gets better and we can create the spaces, the homes we longed to have. I think this is a sentiment he has expressed in a few different songs.

[macherielaila]

[hamburgernotsohelpful]

Anyway, The thing is what I really mean…

Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen

And you can tell everybody This is your song

I know it’s quite simple but now that it’s done

I Hope You don’t mind

I Hope you don’t mind

That I put down in words

How wonderful life is

While your in the world

[harrys-h0es]

[mustachrryluvr]

your instagram stories if Harry was your boyfriend 🫶🏻

[narrycherries]

the only hair era that matters 😭😭😭🤌🏻💓

[rome-theeempire]

Dating is ight but have you ever had a best friend???

I think about them all the time <3

[fallingsolonely]

Affliction • Part 1

Warning

This one-shot contains sexual content as well as mentions of death.

This story is about young lovers reconnecting years later, only to be faced with a heartbreaking truth.

[This one-shot is LONG! The whole thing has a word count of 19k so I will be posting it in parts]

I hope you enjoy! This is my first time posting a story on Tumblr.

Word count - Part 1 - 6.1k

~~~~

[Charlotte's POV]

"You played so beautifully tonight, Charlotte" He whispers, kissing my hand.

The entire night he's been making me melt into a puddle. He's been so sweet and paitent.

I haven't felt like this in a long time, happy.

Genuinely happy.

It scares me so much.

The alcohol in my system fucks with my emotions and I try not to show it.

I hate how much of an empath he is because hiding anything from him is near impossible. Hes always been like that.

"Thank you" I say quietly, watching as he plays with my fingers.

I can hear my mother's voice ringing in my head, almost begging me. Pleading with me to tell him.

"My darling, I know, I know you don't want to hurt anyone" She's holding my face in her hands, making me look at her.

I'm bawling. I can't help it. I don't want this, I don't want him here. I can't do this.

I can't hurt him. Not Harry. Not one of the sweetest souls I have ever known.

"But this, hiding the truth from everyone is hurting you. Charlotte, you're my daughter. I love you more than you will ever understand. You deserve happiness and I very much believe that Harry being here tonight is not a coincidence" She hugs me tightly, letting me cry my eyes out into her chest.

"I don't want you having any regrets" She whispers, rubbing my back.

"I don't know how" I pull back and look at her. She places her hand on my cheek.

"You will, darling" She reassures.

"Charlotte?" I feel his thumb on my cheek, taking me out of my head.

"Sorry" I look away from him, suddenly sober as anxiety begins to fill me again.

I decided the moment I agreed to hang out with him that I was going to tell him.

I'm so scared. I haven't told anyone.

Selfishly, I broke up with my ex just to avoid this.

Hurting my family is enough.

"Why are you sorry?" He grabs my chin and turns my head.

I tear up, realizing we are reaching a point where I have to tell him.

"Honey, if something is bothering you, you know you can tell me, right?" He leans closer to me, his fingers brushing away the tears running down my cheeks.

I've been an emotional wreck all night. Even before Harry showed up.

How could I not be?

I was living a dream, I'm in New York and tonight I performed the show of my life. I've never had this kind of opportunity.

"What made you come?" I ask, needing to know why. Why, of all times to reconnect, did he decide now.

He runs his fingers through my hair and then along my jaw. He's so close to me.

"I almost didn't" He admits to me. He pulls back from me and reaches into his pocket, pulling out a little keychain.

"My mum called me earlier, telling me about your performance tonight. I'm only in New York for a bit and showing up to public events unannounced, usually isn't something I do" He looks at the little token in his hand.

"I went to this store and when I was leaving I saw this" He shows it to me. It's a violin.

I can't help it, anything involving music, especially violin, makes me light up.

I smile and take it from him. Its so cute. I love it.

"It made me think about the days when we'd get my house to ourselves and get drunk. You'd dance around, playing your violin like you were auditioning for Juliard" He smiles at me, looking at the keychain in my hands.

"I'm going to be front row, you know" He says, a playful smile on his face.

We were sitting on his bed, right next to eachother. Both leaning against his head board. I'm sitting more on my side, facing him. My legs curled up and my knees pushing against his thigh.

"What do you mean?" I wonder.

"When you score your first show at Carnegie" He says, the sweetest fucking smile on his face.

"Seeing you up on stage tonight. Fuck, Charlotte. You belong up there and I know I'm not the only one who would die to see you play something of your own"

Hes going to make me fucking bawl my eyes out. Something I desperately don't want to do in front of him.

"You are so talented and so beautiful, darling" He leans in closer to me and gently kisses my forehead.

He stays close, resting his forehead on mine.

I can feel the butterflies in my stomach, the fear.

I'm so scared, I don't know how to tell him.

I just want to be in this moment with him, no where else.

He brushes my cheek with the back of his knuckles. He's so soft.

"I mean it, Charlotte" He's serious.

"I got so lucky to be where I am. But you-" He pokes my chest and he's smiling again.

"You deserve the world and I know your going to change it. Just you and your little violin" He taps my nose with his finger and then smiles so wide.

I can't think of a person who deserves everything more than Harry. He didn't just get lucky, I may not have kept in touch with him but I know he worked his ass off to be in the position he's in now.

I shake my head, finding the courage to place my hand on his cheek.

I run my fingers through his hair and he smiles at me. His hair is longer than mine. It suits him.

"The day I met you I knew the world was going to fall in love with you. How could they not? Your smile alone is enough to brighten a room. You make everyone around you happy. Even when you're not, you always make sure everyone around you is smiling. Harry, there is no one who deserves the world more than you" I whisper to him, closing my eyes for a moment.

Our faces are so close, foreheads pressed together.

When I open my eyes again, I catch it.

I watch as his eyes quickly flutter up to meet my gaze.

Before I know it, it's the only thing I can think about. I fight it, so hard.

But I can't help myself, I glance down for just a second.

I quickly realize what Im doing but it's way too late. The moment I did it, he knew.

In just that little glance I get a picture of his heart shaped lips. Pink, soft looking lips.

I haven't had feelings like this in a long time.

The only thing in my head right now is him. Nothing else.

Not the consequences of these actions. Not the heartbreaking truth of my reality.

Just him.

I close my eyes, moving my hands down to the collar of his shirt and gripping it slightly to steady myself.

My stomach is doing flips, sensing Harry's slow movement closer to me. His hand slides into my hair and rests on the back of my neck.

With just a slight push, our lips connect.

I get nervous, instinctively pushing him back but just barely and not for long.

I wanted it.

I pull him back and we are kissing again.

It's so soft, both of us moving delicately.

It feels so fucking good.

It gets heavier and my heart is pounding. I'm so lightheaded but I don't want to stop.

I want to pull him as close to me as I can and I know he's thinking the same because he places his hands on my hips and brings me into his lap.

I straddle his thighs, my hands tangling in his hair. He's got one hand pulling my face closer to his and the other is on my hip.

He moves his lips, kissing along my jaw. His mouth is warm. It tickles my skin and I want more of it.

He pulls back to look at me for a second and cups my cheek.

"You are so beautiful" He whispers.

"So. Fucking. Beautiful" Between each word he lightly kisses me.

He doesn't pull back after the last one.

But this is when it hits me.

Oh no.

Fuck.

I can feel the anxiety dragging itself through my body, curling around every nerve.

In a panic, I push myself away from him.

I get off of his lap.

I can't believe I let it get that far. Especially before telling him. He deserves to know before anything else happens between us.

"Charlotte, darling, are you okay?" He follows me, but I get off the bed. Still turned away from him.

My mum told me I'd know how to do this.

But I don't. Anxiety is tearing me apart. I don't want to hurt him. I don't want pull him into this but it's too late.

This entire day is a dream. I can't even believe it's real. I never in a million years would have thought I'd reconnect with Harry. In New York City.

"I'm sorry if I'm pushing this too quickly" He says and then I do turn around. This isn't his fault.

God, I'd give anything in the world to lay in this bed with him all night.

"It's not you, Harry" I whisper, letting him reach out to grab my hand. He pulls me towards him.

"All night, something has been bothering you" He takes my other hand in his as well.

"Whatever it is, Charlotte-" He squeezes my hands tightly, pulling me even closer to him.

"Darling, you can tell me"

I know he's serious. He cares about me and it makes it so much harder.

I look at him and see the worry in his eyes.

I tear up and he hugs me. He wraps his arms around my waist and hugs me tightly.

It makes me cry. I hug him tighter, crying into his chest.

I haven't told anyone. I haven't said it out loud. I've cut off almost all of my relationships.

I don't want to hurt anyone.

God, I don't want to hurt Harry. He's the last person I want to hurt.

He pulls back from me, he brings a hand to my cheek and brushes his thumb back and forth.

"Anything, love" He pulls my face closer to his, our noses almost touching.

"You can tell me absolutely anything, Charlotte"

He kisses the edge of my lips and tightens the hold he has around my waist.

My arms are still around his neck.

I bring my hands from his hair to his face. I hold his face in my hands, fighting to keep myself from tearing up again but I can't help it.

This man deserves nothing less than happiness. He isn't going to get that with me.

I hate it, so much.

I can hear my mother's voice in my head, telling me that I don't get to make the decision for him. She's right. I know she is.

It doesn't make anything easier.

"I-I don't want to hurt you" I whisper. I look at him for a moment, his face is warm in my hands.

I stroke his cheek for a moment and then pull away.

I back away from him, but take his hand as I do. I gently guide him back over to the bed and sit on the edge of it.

He joins me, sitting next to me and holding my hand tightly.

I take a few deep breaths, trying to find a way to say it.

But there isn't any way to say it. There's no way to sugar coat the inevitable truth.

I don't look at him, I just pull his hand into my lap and play with his fingers.

"H-Harry-" I squeeze his hand in my both of mine and look at him.

"I-Im sick-"

I can feel it, every fucking stage of grief running through me in an instant.

I'm supposed to be in therapy. Perhaps I should go. Maybe this would have been easier.

*Earlier That Evening*

[Harry's POV]

This isn't what I expected I'd be doing tonight. But curiosity always gets the best of me.

Not just that, but the flood of memories when I heard her name.

About 6 hours ago, I was in a meeting. I can still feel the nerves from it, the adrenaline at the thought of a new adventure.

A movie, I never imagined acting would be something I would pursue.

A lot of it is still quite secretive but I sent in an audition a little while ago.

I got to meet the director today, over a zoom call.

Christopher Nolan.

I smile thinking about it. How fucking excited I am. I fly out to London in a few days to meet him officially.

Before I could call her, my mum called me.

She never fails to call me, it's rare that I miss it.

God, I am so grateful to that woman.

Tonight, she hit me with a blast from the past.

Charlotte Cohen.

I haven't thought about that name in a long time. Her scent is the first thing that came to my head.

Strawberries.

When that memory came, all of it did.

All of the memories of that girl and the hold she had on me back then. I was convinced we'd get married.

So much has happened since then.

Sometimes it's difficult, thinking about the past. How different my life was then compared to now.

It's insane to think about it too much. I try not too.

I don't like to dwell on how things could have been if I hadn't decided to take on the world. Put my name out there.

I am happy. Unbelievably happy with where I am in my life now. I am free to explore any opportunity that comes my way and I have been lucky enough to have many.

After the phone call with my mother, I sat in my car and I let myself do it.

I let myself think about all of those memories I have with Charlotte.

A part of me will always love that girl, she could have tried to stop me from auditioning but she never did.

She supported every dream I had. She was there, the day of my audition.

So much has changed. I haven't seen her in a couple years at least.

My mum informed me that Charlotte had been invited to play at a Classical Music Charity event at The Town Hall right in New York City.

Where I happen to be at the moment. I wasn't meant to be here long. Just visiting a friend for a few days.

After I had gotten myself away from thinking so much about the past, and her I decided against going.

And then, we reach now.

I'm sitting in my car, twirling the little keychain between my fingers.

After talking to my mum on the phone, I met up with some friends. We ended up in this quaint little vintage trinket shop.

Something I probably have too much of, but I always see things that remind me of friends and family.

A way to keep those closest to me, with me all the time.

As we checked out, I noticed this little rack of keychains. Among them was one very in particular.

A violin.

I see her, twirling around my bedroom and playing her heart out.

She was astonishingly talented.

I remember her dream, Juliard.

I smile, thinking about the way I teased her about it. How her dream after school, is more school.

Shes always been smart as whip.

It's something I had adored about her back then.

I wonder if that's why she's in New York, I hope it is. I knew that girl for years, Juliard and then a sold out concert at Carnegie Hall.

That was everything to her and I can remember it so clearly.

She was stubborn, so stubborn. There's not a doubt in my mind that girl would get accepted into Juliard on her first try.

I bought my ticket an hour ago and decided not to tell anyone, I didn't even think about it.

Taking a risk, I don't usually. Especially events, showing up places unannounced doesn't always go well for me.

Depending on the place and the event, most people are respectful. Most people will leave me alone, some will say hi or ask for a picture.

I never imagined I'd be at a point in my life where I have to think carefully about going into public.

From what I gathered online, the event is a musical charity fundraiser.

Charlotte is closing it with a violin solo.

I made sure to buy a ticket closest to the exit. Luckily, I've been to a few shows at The Town Hall and know how to find my way around the place.

_________

I'm lucky enough to make it to my seat, virtually unnoticed. I noticed some second glances but I kept myself composed and went straight to my seat.

With another stroke of luck, I'm seated next to a sweet elderly couple. They both smile at me, I'm unsure if either of them recognize me.

After a few moments of people settling into their seats, the lights dimmed and the stage lit up.

A well put together woman walked onto the stage.

"Thank you to everyone who came out today, it has truly been an honor to be your host. All of our participating charities have come together and organized an amazing show for you tonight. Everyone up here has been impacted by these charities and therefore you, this is just a small way to say thank you. So, sit back and enjoy the show"

______

It truly is quite the show. Every performance is its own, every person bearing their soul in their own way. From slam poetry to choirs.

It was very fun to watch, very emotional.

With every performance that passes I wonder when she will be coming on. I find it hard to focus as I think about her.

The last time we spoke was over 2 years ago when her father passed. I couldn't make it to the funeral but we talked on the phone for over an hour.

I remember it, sitting in my hotel room and dialing her number. I was nervous about it, talking to her.

I shouldn't have been, besides a few awkward minutes at the start, we talked like we had never stopped talking.

As soon as I brought up her violin, she couldn't stop talking. It's been her life for as long as I've known her.

We kept talking for a bit afterwards, but life happened and I haven't heard really anything about her since.

My trance is broken by an eruption of clapping, I quickly join in. I feel bad that my mind is so preoccupied.

I selfishly came to a charity event at the chance to reconnect with someone. I donated to the charity that chose Charlotte to represent them, when I bought the ticket.

But, as much as I have enjoyed the night, she's the only thing I'm thinking about.

The curtains close and the familiar voice of the host, speaks out.

"We'd like to thank you again for joining us tonight, please give a warm welcome to our last performer of the night, Charlotte Cohen"

Suddenly, I'm alert.

It goes quiet and the curtains open, I can see her outline in the darkness. I watch as she prepares herself, shaking away the nerves.

Then, the spotlight appears and she's glowing.

She looks incredible.

She's wearing a beautiful white dress, her lips are painted red and her hair falls in loose curls.

I smile when my eyes reach her shoes, they are pink and from what I can tell, they are decorated with strawberry designs.

A weird little quirk, her obsession with strawberries. It's something not many people guess about her.

We met at a wedding when I was 14. She was the only one at the dessert table and I watched as she carefully picked out almost all of the strawberries and took them back to her table.

It's such a fond memory, meeting her.

Teasing her about taking all of the berries and then from that moment, we were almost inseparable.

I witnessed her perform for the first time and I can still remember exactly what I felt watching her.

I can feel it as I see her up on stage in this moment.

She has my full attention. I can sense her nerves in the way she takes a deep breath and closes her eyes.

And then, she starts to play.

I watch as her demeanor changes into one of focus and confidence.

'I don't play the violin, the violin plays me'

She said it all the time.

The talent she has, you'd almost believe it.

It's incredible to watch, to know she has been passionate about this since she could walk.

She's beautiful and elegant and the music is heavenly.

I'm in awe of her, watching as she plays with both vigor and melancholy.

The composition she's is playing is Tchaikovsky.

I know a scarce amount about him compared to Charlotte. I do know he's not easy to play and his music, being performed by her is something out of this world.

She's so skillful and meticulous in how she plays. She's very focused on what she's doing but everyone can see what it does to her.

The way she gets pulled into the music and pours out every part of herself.

It's emotional. I can see the tears shine on her cheeks and I want to know what she's thinking.

I hope she knows just how captivating she is as a performer. It blows my mind how this

girl doesn't have her name everywhere.

I can't put into words how attractive it is watching someone perform the way she does.

I haven't seen it in a long time, she's fucking stunning.

She has the whole room collectively in her world. Everyone is completely focused on her.

I don't think there's a dry eye in the room when she finishes the peice.

It's a moment of silence when she's complete and then an eruption of cheers.

People are quick to get on their feet and it makes me so happy to see it.

All for her, I've never met anyone who's

deserved recognition more than that girl.

I stand there for a moment and clap along.

She finally opens her eyes, her cheeks are tear stained but she smiles.

She looks around the audience.

For a moment, I feel like our gaze meets.

But I realize, I need to leave.

Quickly, I make my way to the exit before people start to make their way out.

I don't plan on leaving, my goal is to find her.

I know the building somewhat, but it's been a while since I've been here.

I also have no idea where her dressing room, would be.

I make my way towards where I think I have the best shot. I push open a door and bump into someone.

"Oh, I'm sorry" I say, brushing myself off and looking at the man I bumped into.

Instantly, I see the recognition on his face.

"You're Harry Styles" He's both confused and shocked.

I smile at him, I'm always tempted to laugh when someone says it to me. Like I don't know. It's sweet.

"Am I?" I ask, looking around. I laugh to ease the man and after a moment the shock wears off.

"I wasn't aware of any special guests? Especially, you. No offense of course, I'm just shocked" He looks me up and down.

"No, it's alright. I'm not a guest actually, I came to enjoy the show" I wonder if this man can help me find Charlotte.

"Well, I guess that's not the whole truth. I'm looking for one of the performers. Perhaps you can help me, Charlotte Cohen the violinist?" He looks at me, he's confused again.

"You know Charlie?" Now that's a name I haven't heard in a long time.

I never used her nickname, not even since the day we met.

"She's an old friend, do you know where I could find her?" I ask.

"Yeah, she's probably in her dressing room now. Come, I'll take you" He says, turning around and walking down the hallway we were in.

"She's never mentioned knowing Harry Styles" He says, looking at me like he's trying to figure me out.

"It was a long time ago. I heard she was performing tonight and wanted to reconnect"

"Well, she's just down here. Bless the soul on that girl, I've never met someone in my life as extraordinary as her. My daughter adored her before she passed away, she visited her in the hospital every week before that. I shouldn't be surprised that she knows someone like, well, you" He stopped outside of a door.

"I'm sorry to hear about your daughter" I say. He smiles at me.

"Oh I couldn't even imagine her face right now, standing in front of you. She was a big fan. Probably the biggest smile ever, she was the happiest little girl you'd ever meet" He looks at his feet and then back at me.

"Sorry, Charlie is right in here" He motions to the door and then opens it.

"Hey Charlie, you were incredible tonight. As always. I have a friend here to see you"

He steps in before me, but I'm quick to follow him into the room.

Charlotte looks up from the couch she's sitting on, quickly gathering herself and wiping her cheeks. But I can see light streaks of her mascara. She was crying.

"I'm sorry, Charlie, If Im interrupting" I hadn't gotten the name of the man.

"Oh no, it's alright Thomas. It's been an emotional night for everyone"

I look at her, Charlotte's mother. Edith. She sees me and her eyes light up.

"Is that, Harry Styles?" She walks up to me and the first thing she does is grab my cheeks.

"Oh my gosh, you have grown" She has the sweetest smile on her face and I laugh at the way she squishes my cheeks.

"Edith, you look amazing" She hugs me so tight.

"I know you're here for my baby, be easy with her, please. A lot has changed" She whispers in my ear as we hug.

She pulls back from me, her hands on my cheeks again. She smiles at me.

"You've done so well for yourself, Harry. You're a man now" I smile back at her, but her words bring my gaze to Charlotte.

She's already looking at me, now standing on her feet.

"How about, we let the kids talk" Thomas, takes Ediths hand and pulls her out of the room.

I look her over, finally up close. She's matured so much. Both of us have.

"Hi, Charlotte" I say, taking a step towards her.

She doesn't move, she stands where she is.

She's nervous, I can tell as she subtly picks at the paint on her nails.

"Hi, Harry" She whispers, she looks down at her hands. She smooths out her dress and I can see she's shaking a bit.

I think she realizes it because she looks up at me and puts her hands behind her back.

"I'm sorry, If Im intru-" She shakes her head and shuffles towards me.

"No, don't do that. I'm being weird" She takes a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment before looking at me again.

This time, her smile is warm. But I know the nerves are still there. She's very bad at hiding it, she always has been.

"It's just been a very emotionally overwhelming day. And then, you" She takes another little shuffle towards me.

"I think you were the last person I was expecting to see tonight" Her voice is soft, almost fragile.

"It's really good to see you, Harry" She takes one more tiny step towards me and then looks up at me.

"It's really good to see you too" I smile at her.

"I liked your mom's reaction, she hugged me right away" I say playfully, making her smile brighten just slightly.

"Shut up" She whispers sheepishly.

Hesitantly, she reaches up and wraps her arms around my neck. I quickly wrap my arms around her waist and pull her closer to me. Hugging her tightly.

After a moment, she hugs me tighter and buries her face into my shoulder.

It feels amazing, hugging her. She's so warm.

She's so fragile and I wish I knew why.

Her mother's request backs it up. I hope she tells me.

I don't want her to be hurting in any way.

I don't realize how long we hug until we get interrupted, the door opens and she quickly breaks it.

Her cheeks turn pink and she looks away from me. Edith, however has the cutest smile on her face.

"I just wanted to say goodbye, I have to head out" Thomas says.

He walks up to Charlotte and hugs her. He faintly whispers to her but I don't make it out.

"Charlotte, you are the most beautiful soul I know. There is no one I would have rathered choosen to close the show tonight. Thank you" He cups her cheek for a moment and kisses her forehead.

Shes trying so hard to hold back tears and it breaks my heart.

"You changed my life, Thomas. I will forever be grateful to you" She hugs him hard.

Tears falling down her cheeks when she closes her eyes.

"I'll see you when I get to England" He says to her, his voice serious and firm.

"I promise" She says smiling at him.

He turns to me before he leaves.

"It was a pleasure to meet you. Thank you for coming tonight and supporting us" He reaches out his hand and I shake it.

"With a father like you, I'm sure you're daughter is very proud" He smiles and reaches out his other hand, squeezing mine in both of his.

"Thank you"

He leaves the room. Leaving just me, Charlotte and her mum.

I want to take her to dinner. Catch up, hang out. I wonder if she's up for it.

"Edith, would you be alright if I steal her for a little bit?" I look at Charlotte and smile at her.

"Would you like to get dinner with me, darling?" I ask.

"Can I talk to my mum for a second?" She looks up at me, her expression impossible to read.

"Of course, I'll step out" I look between them and smile before leaving the room.

I lean against the wall and wait patiently.

God, she's stunning. She's grown so beautifully both physically and with her talent.

But I can tell that something is up. Well, I don't need to tell about if, I know something is.

I hope whatever is she opens up to me. I want to make her feel better.

After some time, the door opens and they emerge.

"Nothing too crazy" Edith says to me, her tone playful.

"I was just thinking we'd hop on my private jet and go to Italy for the night" I say shrugging.

I glance at Charlotte and smile at her. She starts giggling and it's the cutest sound.

"Nothing too fancy, don't want to over do it" I smile at her more and her giggling turns into laughing and it's so genuine.

It's the first time tonight I see a true smile on her face.

"Would you like me to drive you back to your hotel?" I ask, looking at Edith.

"I don't get an invite to Italy?" Now all of us are laughing.

I watch Charlotte. She glows when she's happy. Always has.

"It's alright sweetie, I'll get myself a taxi. Text me, let me know if you are staying with him for the night" I watch her cheeks turn pink again at the idea of spending the night with me. I definitely don't mind if she does.

"Okay" She whispers, hugging her mother.

Edith turns to me and pats my cheek.

"You know, every time your mother calls me to check in, she always gushes about you. Her sweet baby boy, taking over the world. Everyone at home is so proud of you" I smile and lean in to kiss her cheek.

"Thank you" I say, hugging her as well.

She turns around and walks away.

"Come on, I'm parked around the back" I say, reaching for her hand and pulling her with me.

"Would you like to go out for dinner or get some take out and go back to my place?" I look at her as we walk, her gaze is on our connected hands.

Until she senses me looking at her. She looks at me, her grip on my hand tightening just a bit.

"I-I'm actually not very hungry" She says shyly. I smile and squeeze her hand.

"That's alright, my love. Want to head to my place? We could watch a movie, catch up" She smiles back at me and nods.

"That sounds nice" She agrees.

We walk in silence the rest of the way to my car. Our hands still laced together.

Thank god for private parking.

The last thing I want to happen is for her face to end up all over the place just because she's seen with me.

It's an unfortunate warning I give to anyone I'm seeing.

We reach the car and I open the door for her.

"Do you bring your violin everywhere you go?" I ask, taking the case from her as she climbs in.

"I'm in New York, inspiration can strike at any moment" She says and I smile widely.

I close the door for her and excitedly get into the drivers seat. Music makes me so happy.

"What are you suddenly so excited about? Oh no, are you kidnapping me?" She asks, both of us laughing at the same time.

"No" I shake my head, like a kid.

"Are you composing now?" I ask and I think she realizes what I'm excited about.

She gets shy and looks away from me. I watch as her curls hide her face from me and all I can think about is how fucking cute she is.

"Why are you shy about it?" I ask, I turn in my seat and reach out. I place my hand on her cheek and make her look at me.

Her face is warm and I can feel it getting warmer when her eyes meet mine.

"Asks, Harry Styles" She says her tone is soft as she trys to be playful.

"What do you mean?" I ask, I lightly brush my thumb back and forth.

"Harry, you're the most talented composer I know" I can't help but smile even more at her compliment. My stomach is warm and full of butterflies.

"So?" I pull her just a little bit closer, I run my fingers through a fallen curl and lightly push it back behind her ear. I cup her cheek again.

"Do you think I'm going to judge you, darling?" I ask, brushing her cheek again.

"Because, I can tell you it's quite the opposite, Charlotte" I can see her getting emotional, her eyes becoming glossy.

"You have no idea how much I'd love to pick that beautiful mind of yours. I'd love to hear you play one of your peices" I say, I brush my thumb under her eye. Wiping away the tear that falls from it.

"Are you okay, love?"

She pulls back from me, sitting back against her seat. She quickly wipes her cheeks and stares down into her lap.

She picks at the paint on her nails.

"I'm okay" She whispers. She doesn't look at me. I watch her for a moment, wishing she'd open up to me.

I just want her to be okay. But not this, I know she's not okay. I know she's lying to me.

I look ahead of me, starting the car and shifting the gear into drive. After, I reach next to me until I reach her hand. I lace our hands together.

Shes shaking a bit but she holds onto me tightly.

End of Part 1.

[xxrosebunny]

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[iloveicelandicdoggystyle]

I HATE math thx very much😤😪🤚🏼