#happy valentine's day 2020 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

spidybaby · 9 months ago

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Valentine's Day through the years

A little late valentine's day gift from me to you 😋❤️

February 2020

"Can you open the door? Is Aurora." You sister asks, brush in one hand and hairspray on the other.

She was throwing a valentine's day party and you were helping her with opening the door since she said "only friends" are allowed.

"Isn't it a little early for her to be here?" You ask, confused. Getting up from your bed. "Like two hours early."

"just open the door." she yells from her bathroom.

You walked downstairs, mad that you weren't allowed to be at the party but you were opening everybody's knock.

"Hola guapa." Aurora says, hugging you. "Pablo had the cupcakes, help him please."

Behind her it was Pablo, he was carrying two cupcake plates, they look amazing you had to admit.

You grab one of the plates, walking to the garden and leaving it on the very pink and red table.

"Y/n, Pablo's staying, maybe you guys can watch a movie or something." Aurora says, she was putting some decorations on the garden. "and don't worry I'll take care of the door."

You turn to Pablo, he has this mad face. You and him are civil but he never cross words with you.

"we can see something in my room." You offer, he nods. You both walk to your room. He sits on the chair you have there. "You can sit on the bed."

He does that, sitting next to you. You open netflix and pass him the remote, you let him pick whatever he likes.

"I like comedies and I like action movies. But you can pick any movie you want." You smile at him.

You can't deny your little crush on him. Aurora and your sister are like glue, always together, meaning whenever they have the chance they force you to go out with them.

The thing here is, Pablo was shy, he was very introverted and he didn't even answer you with more than a yes or no.

"Do you want some pop corn and soda?" You get up from bed and walk to your door. "I know you're a footballer but a cheat day won't hurt"

The little smile he gives you is making your stomach go crazy. He nods excited. "do you have that red soda?"

"si, do you want a cupcake? I can steal two."

"por favor." he smiles big, you love the way he was smiling.

You hurry downstairs, grabbing a package of popcorn and throwing them in the microwave.

"Aurora, I think the bathroom is not working, is that going to be a problem?"

"What? No, that can't be I just went." she leaves what she's doing. "let me check, maybe it's not."

When she left the table you grab two of the pink cupcakes. Hurrying to the kitchen to hide them.

"False alarm, is working." she says happy. "sorry I left you with my brother, mom asked me to bring him and well you guys are the same age. Just ask him about football or something."

"Yeah, no problem."

When the popcorn is ready you grab everything in a little tray and carefully take it to your room.

"I have that red soda and the cupcake."

His eyes light up, it was like seeing a child excited for candy even when mom said no.

"I picked a comedy, since you say you like them."

Your smile grow, you leave the tray on your bed, taking a sit next to him you both watch the comedy.

After three movies, two comedies and one action. The night was coming to an end, sadly, you think to yourself.

The music from the party recently gone as your sister's friends say goodbye to her.

You turn the TV off, moving the empty popcorn bowl. The two cupcakes seating on top of the tray.

You remembered what Aurora told you. "cómo van los partidos?" (how are the matches?)

He scuff, he knows you don't know anything about football. "good, I scored a goal in my last one." he smiles proud.

You nod, not sure what else to ask. "that's good, so you're a forward?"

"No, I'm a midfielder."

"Oh, okay." You say low. "and do you like being a midfielder?"

He laughs, you smile a little at that, at least one of you is having fun with the talk. "I do, I love playing. When I play I feel so good."

"You play really good, the other day Aurora showed us a video."

He blush at the confession. He loves when people ask about football but with you he feels more shy than usual.

"I have a game in a few days, maybe you can come." he asks, very low voice. Grabbing the cupcake and biting it to make the things less awkward.

"Pablo." You laugh, the frosting from the cupcake on his nose. "come here."

You grab a napkin, cleaning carefully his nose. His eyes are on you the whole time, he love the way your eyes shine, maybe too much to ever say it.

"Done." You smile, getting up from bed and throwing the napkin on the little trashcan in your room.

Aurora knocks on the door, announcing that their mom was waiting for them and to pick his things.

"Thank you for the movie and for the food, I really enjoy it."

Your smile grow, he loved that. "Thank you for not leaving me alone, it would have been so much worse without you here."

Aurora screaming at Pablo to go interrupt your chat. He waves goodbye and walk out of your room.

"Pablo." You call, hand on the door and only half body out of the door. "Hope you score a goal for this match, so I can say I have a good memory of my first match."

The last thing you see is his smile, closing the door and trying to remain calm. You feel like in one of those romantic movies.

February 2021

"That was amazing. You did it amazing, Pablo. " You jump in his arms, excited about the victory.

"Did you see that assist?" He asks happily, arms hugging you tightly. "Thank you for coming."

Pablo and you became closer after the last 14th of February. You two became what your sisters are.

Aurora and your sister keep telling you that Pablo likes you as more than a friend. You prefer to let him tell you that and don't make yourself the fool.

"Of course I was coming. My boy is in the first team. I can't lose this."

My boy

Pablo loves it when you call him that. You're very special. The way you take care of him, motivate him to be better. In less than a year, you became his number one supporter.

"I think I'm allowed to eat something I shouldn't just tonight. Want to do that with me?" He grabs your hand and walks with you back to Pedri.

"Hola, long time no see," Pedri jokes with you. He knows about Pablo's crush on you and takes every opportunity to make it notice. "Did you enjoy the game?"

"I did, I'm happy you guys got assists today." You high-five Pedri. Pablo can't help the big smile he has.

To all the people around you it was obvious the connection you two have. They just need to look at Pablo's eyed when he's talking about you or talking to you.

"The eyes never lie." That's what his mother says.

Pedri drop the two of you to a restaurant. Asking Pablo to be careful and to enjoy the night.

You walk in front of him, that's when he notices that you're wearing the shirt he gave you. The one he used to play for the first time with the first team.

That number 30 and his name sitting on your back are doing things to him.

"Hello, how many in your party?" The host asks you.

"Two, please."

"You're so lucky. We have a table ready for you."

She guides you to the table. You love the decorations of the place, it was all so cute yet not exorbitant and tacky.

"We have a special Valentine's Day menu for all our couples. I'll leave it here and I'll leave two normal menus in case you want something else."

You can't help but blush at her words. You two aren't a couple, not because you don't want to, but you like the way that sounds.

"So, since you're my valentine's today," Pablo jokes, the smile he has is a teasing one. "Two valentine's day meals?"

"You didn't ask me to be your valentine" you pout, making him laugh.

"Y/n, pretty girl, will you be my valentine?"

He grabs a rose from the little bouquet that's making decoration in the wall next to him. He offers the rose to you with a big smile.

"I'll have to think about it, Mister Gavi." You take the rose, smelling it.

"What about now?" He steals another two roses, giving them to your now small bouquet. "Will you be now?"

"Yes." You grab his hand and intertwine your fingers with him. "That means you're buying me dessert."

He laughs, not letting your hand go. He nods at you, noticing how you're looking at your hands. He brings your hand closer to his mouth, giving it a kiss.

"I'll get you anything you want."

The little interaction was interrupted by the waitress. You both order the valentine's day meal.

Dinner was good. You both laughed with stories from the dressing room. He was spilling all the things that happened today.

"There's a park like a block away. Would you like to walk for a little while before I drop you home?"

"That would be nice. Maybe my pants will fit me again." You both laugh at that.

Once you're out of the restaurant and near the park, your hands find his again. You smile at the thought of him wanting more than just friendship.

After all, Aurora and your sister were sure of it. But what if it wasn't like that? What if he's just a very affectionate friend?

Friends held hands? Yes, they do.

Friends support each other? Yes.

Friends take each other out to eat on valentine's day? ... maybe?

The park has these rose tunnels. They were beautiful and very romantic. The way the little light was enough and gave this romantic vibe to the people walking in.

"What's on your mind? Pretty girl." He stops, noticing how you're lost in your thoughts.

Do you want to ruin the night with the question that's burning your brain? Do you want to ruin the friendship by letting your mind run crazy?

You look at him, worried frown on his face. "Tell me, maybe I can help you?" The way his hands are now on your waist, bringing you closer to him.

You're not sure if you should tell him. You're not ready for his answer. You don't want to end the day crying in your room.

"I'm just thinking." You whisper.

"About?"

"Us." You confess.

His grip is stronger, not hurting you, but enough for you to notice the sudden change.

"What about us?" He whispers. He's scared, scared of you telling him that you only like him as a friend. Scared of losing you.

"Pablo, I like you." You say. Lips quivering.

He's internally screaming, making the best work of his life by keeping that famous frown.

You wait for him to say something, eyes glued to each other. As the seconds pass, you feel your heart breaking. He doesn't like you that way.

But how wrong you're, his mind is working a thousand miles per hour. Not sure how to tell you that he likes you too without sounding too crazy.

Your hands move from his shoulders to his hands, moving them away from you. You want to go home and cry yourself to sleep.

That action makes him go back to reality. He notices your tearful eyes. "Wait, no."

"No, it's okay. I can take a cab home. Don't worry."

You decided to leave, not wanting for him to see you cry. But the grip on your arm stops you. "Wait, Y/n."

"No, Pablo. It's okay, I just want to go home." You remove his hand from your arm, walking away from him.

"Can you let me say what I have to say?" He grabs your arm again. He needs to say it.

"You don't have to say anything, I know."

"No, you don't, shit you don't." His hands go back to your waist. "You don't know because I've been a stupid kid who doesn't know any better, I like you too, maybe too much for me to feel comfortable saying it."

You want to say something, but he keeps rambling.

"And you have no idea, joder. The way you look at me with those beautiful shiny eyes and the way you smile or laugh even at my bad jokes." He laughs, making you laugh. "The way my name looks on your back is making me think things I shouldn't but things I only think about you. And the way you know my sister and she loves you and my mom. Gosh, my mom. "

"What about your mom?" You ask confused.

"She told me to confess because a girl like you won't come twice in a lifetime." He hugs you, bringing you closer to him. You lock your arms behind his neck. "I like you more than you think. I was just too scare to say it before."

"I'm head over heels with everything you just said, but can you please shut up and kiss me?" You smile, making him chuckle.

His hand goes to the back of your neck, bringing you closer. The kiss is everything you ever dreamed of. All those nights dreaming about it now coming true.

He smiles into the kiss. Happy that the girl he always had a crush on, the sister of his sister's best friend, the one Aurora always tried to bring closer because they were the same age.

"Se mi novia." (Be my girlfriend) He let's out, not thinking much about it. "I can't let another day pass without making you my girlfriend." You nod, kissing him again.

"Te prometo que voy a hacer algo mejor que esto, pero hoy quiero volver a casa y que todos sepan que eres mía." (I promise that I'm doing something better than this, but tonight I just want to go back home and let all my family know you're mine.)

You press your forehead to his, enjoying the moment. He was yours, and you were his. That's all you need to know.

February 2022

"Pablo, stop it." You say, morning voice making Pablo chuckle. He continue with the kisses on your neck and back. "Amor, five minutes more."

"You asked me for five minutes like twenty minutes ago."

You open your eyes, room kinda dark thanks to the curtains. The big mirror he has reflecting you with his arms around you.

"Feliz aniversario, preciosa mía." (happy anniversary) he kiss your earlobe. "if you weren't such a sleepy head I would have given you a good morning gift but now I'm thinking of breakfasts." he tease you. Making you blush at the thought of your last night actions.

You turn to face him, smirk on his face. "Feliz aniversario, ojitos lindos." You kiss his lips, your hands caressing his chest. "I'm hungry too."

He laughs, kissing you again. He push you lightly, getting on top of you while he deepens the kiss.

He loves the way you whimper every time he touch you. Every sound, every little jump your body gives. You are his.

"Pablo, I have class in an hour." You remind him. His head buried between you neck. "and I am hungry, amor."

You both get up from bed, quickly running to the bathroom to do your routine and to force Pablo to do the one you taught him to keep his skin clean.

"Oye, I forgot my bag in the truck of my car, can you please help me and bring it? I'll make us some pancakes."

"Yes sir." You laugh, walking to the garage to open the truck. "Oh my god." You find five designer bags. All of them with red bows. "Pablo!"

He smiles when he heards you calling his name. He knows you've been stressing about classes, having barely any sleep.

He also knows you don't like when he spoils you, you're shy about it, telling him that you're more than spoiled with him letting you live with him and not allowing you to pay any bill or anything.

"Amor, what is all this?" You walk inside with the five bags. He smirk, serving the first pancake on the plate.

"A little something for my reina."

"Pablo, I can't. Amor this is too much." You check the first bag. It's a beautiful Hermes blanket you save on Pinterest. "Amor, this cost more than my tuition."

"Not at all." he laughs, the way you look at the blanket with such eyes. The shiny eyes he loves. "Keep looking."

"Dios mio, how?"

He smirks, he had to get your friends help to pick some things like colors or sizes. Like the bag you have in your hands, he knew you wanted it, but you never decided in a color of your preference.

Your eyes land on the red and gold bag. Cartier. You told him once a few months back that you wanted to match with him on something.

You gifted him a bracelet, he wears it everywhere he goes, is his favorite piece of jewelry.

But you wanted something else to match him. You remember that you wanted a P inicial.

His hands on your waist make you go back to reality, it was two necklaces, one with your initial and one with his and a little six.

"We can match now." he whispers in your ear, kissing your neck. "want me to put it in you?"

You nod, happy that he remembered something so small. You feel the tears in your eyes and he lock the necklace in place.

"Pablo." You turn to him, hugging his torso and crying in his chest. "te amo, you're so special."

He caress your back, kissing your head. "You're my baby, my reina, and I'm always going to give you everything you want."

"But I can't give you the same. And that make me feel bad for you, you're so special and I want to spoil you too."

"shhhh. You're special too, you spoil me a lot. You take care of me, you cook for me, you help me when I'm sick, when I'm tired, you're my biggest fan."

You nod, knowing that even when what you give him is not much. For him it was more than enough.

"Now give me a kiss and let's eat, you have to go to class." he dry your tears and kiss your cheeks and then your lips.

"I don't want to go." You whine. Hugging him again.

"Preciosa, see it this way, our kids will need help with the homework, and the one who will help them is you." he jokes. "that's your motivations".

You laugh, he always knew the right thing to say to make you feel better.

February 2023

"Can you serve me some more juice?" he smiles, kissing your shoulder. "pretty please."

"Pablo, venga hombre que tu te puedes levantar. Deja a la niña comer." (c'mon son. You can get up, let her eat in peace) his dad say. Smacking him in the back of the head.

You laugh at that, but you grab his cup and get up to serve him more juice. You know how crazy he gets for orange juice.

"Listo, now eat." You pass him the juice after taking a sip of it.

"Hey. That's mine." he frowns. Joking with you. "Thank you, preciosa."

You were eating with his parents, they were visiting from Sevilla and wanted to spend time with you two.

Aurora and her boyfriend are with you two. You love spending time with them. Going on double dates with them.

"You want to know what's funny?" Aurora giggles. "your sister and I always talked about going on double dates and now that's she's in Paris. You're the one I'm going on double dates with."

You giggle with her. Your sister moved to Paris to study design. She and Aurora always video chat and text but now that you're with Pablo, Aurora and you were closer. Thing that makes your sister extra happy. Knowing that you're taking care of each other.

"We're going on a hiking adventure today, if you guys want to join we will leave after lunch."

You thank him, explaining that Gavi and you were going on a little museum visit.

Gavi's plan was to take you to a museum, you love art. So to him it was a good idea to have a more calm anniversary and to do something you love and enjoy.

"Y/n, cariño. Can you help me later with the cooking, you're the only one that can get the sauce to its point." Belén asks you, you nod excited. "Thank you, mija."

You love cooking with Belen, she always gave you advice and you improved your cooking with her recepies.

After lunch you all chat for a little, you love his family and the love you as their own. If you ask Belen or Pablo's father, they would tell you that they can see you two going for the long ride.

Belén often asks Pablo about the future. If he ever sees you two in his plans. Pablo would say yes without hesitation. You're the most important person in his life. He knows that.

If someone asks you, you would say the same, you can picture yourself with a family. You can picture yourself walking down the aisle to him.

But you two are young. Too young to think about marriage and a family. You want to live a lot of things with him. Not rush into adulthood.

"Let's go, preciosa." he extends his hand out to you, you take it, thumb caressing his skin.

The drive was calm, he was singing this new song he has on replay. You love when he drives, it suits him so much the driver look.

He like the idea of going to a museum date, he's interested in things people don't know about, this being one of them.

"Look, this one is call El Beso" he says. Teasing tone as he elbow your arm.

"Wow, you know how to read names, babe. Good job." You joke. Making him pout.

Your hands intertwine as you walk around. There was this specific painting that Pablo liked. He was reading about it.

"I want a copy of this at home."

"Yes, it's very pretty."

"Pretty like you." he kiss your cheek. Hugging you while he finish reading about the painting.

You love how easy it is to enjoy things with him, how easy is to love him, to talk with him.

"Te amo, Pablito." You kiss his cheek. Hugging him tight.

"I know. I love you so much too." he kiss your lips. Smiling into the kiss.

February 2024

"Careful big boy." You say, helping him walk upstairs of your home. "Let's slow down, you're running."

He was tired. Tired of always needing help, tired of always looking like a kid who needs to be taken care of, tired of not being able to be the old him.

"Joder, I can't do this anymore." he fall in the bed. He feel like crying. "just leave without me."

You sit next to him. Caressing his hair and letting him cry, you help him with his shoes, taking off his Jordan's.

You grab the glass of water you always have next to you in bed. Bringing it to him, "Amor, drink this."

He does as you told him. Drinking the whole glass, you sit behind him, careful with his legs.

"Come here, amor." You push him down to you. His back stick to your chest. Your hands on his hair, nails caressing his scalp. "I'm not going anywhere, not without you." He sobs again, he's not in his best days and you know it. "shhh, I'm here. You're okay."

You treat him like a baby, you're aware of that, but you don't mind it. He was your baby, your Pablito, he was yours and you love taking care of him.

"Today my friend Jessica made cookies." You began telling him about your day to distract him. "and they're so good, I saved you one."

His sobs are more calm now. His breathing still very accelerated and that worries you.

"Also, today on this class, remember the one you convince me to take?" You kiss his hair. Hands caressing his arms up and down. He nods at your question. "Well they asked us today to describe something about our partner or someone we love, like when we knew we loved them."

He's calming down, paying attention to your words. You know how to calm him down, how to take his mind out of his worried state.

"And I talked about that nigh in the park. When you asked me to be your girlfriend." You giggle, remembering how happy you were that night. "I can't forget the words you told me. How your mom told you to confess your feeling for me, because a girl like me happens once in a lifetime."

"That's true." he whispers.

"I knew I loved you because you were so honest with me, you were so straight with your words. How you told me you will give me anything I want. And you do."

"Even when you told me that I spoil you too much." he chuckle.

"And I want you to know how in love I am with you, Pablo. You're my love." You kiss his earlobe, then his head. "do you know that?"

"I know, and I love you so much too. I'm in love with you too."

"So don't ever think just because of your ACL or any other injury I'll leave you behind. Pablo I'm with you for the long ride." You hug him, his hands find yours and intertwine them. "Now, what if we both stay home and I prepare some nice dinner or better, we can order McDonald's."

You see his reflection, he's smiling like crazy, even with red eyes and tearful cheeks he looks like an angel.

"Te amo. You're the love of my life."

"And you're the love of my life." You kiss his head again. "and I know that in every life time we will be together."

"Even as worms?" he tease you.

"Even as worms, mi amor."

You enjoy a night at home with him, telling stories and watching movies that you both later comment.

That's what you enjoy the most, how every moment is a special moment, even the smallest ones.

"Oye, kiddo." You call.

He lift his eyes from his ice-cream. Attention all on you.

"Te amo." You get closer to kiss him. "and I always will."

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saerins · 2 years ago

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─── 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

+ sae x f!reader | wc 3.2k | content: angst, insecurities, death

notes: i’m sorry idk how this came about but i was in a mood :’) i promise i love him okay <3 feedback & reblogs appreciated !!

summary: he’s back home, and you recall the times you’d spoken to him. all the calls you made, then all the calls he made, and then all the times it went to voicemail.

you remember every conversation you’ve had with your boyfriend. the good and the bad, the beautiful and the ugly. it’s hard to quantify into numbers since you’d been together for the last five years.

but there’s a few of them that are prominent, that are burned into your mind, engraved onto your brain. the sound of his laugh, for one, that’s always been precious to you, if only for the fact that he doesn’t laugh often.

sae always said you were the only one who could get that out of him, and you’ve kept it close to your heart since.

to the world, he may have seemed rude and off-putting at times, and despite the countless false reports of sae being an asshole to all his girlfriends in private (because the media can never decide who he’s actually with), he’s always been the same itoshi sae to you—the kind of guy who only ever bothers what you think about him because the other people not involved in your relationship don’t matter.

you remember everything he’s ever done for you.

“you know that one day you’ll be mrs. itoshi, right?”

yeah, you definitely remember.

MARCH 2020; [ sae’s fifth day in spain ]

“you miss me, itoshi sae?”

you can feel him rolling his eyes from the other end. “i should just hang up right now.”

“you could, but then you’d miss me even more.”

sae suppresses a grin, even if there’s no one around to see it. you’re right, but he doesn’t say anything.

it was rare for sae to call you at all. but then again, it is the first time you two had been apart since you got together. maybe it isn’t so weird after all.

“how’d practice go today?”

“it’s fine, nothing i couldn’t handle.” of course he’s fine, he’s the youngest on the team and yet it was as though he’d played the longest.

“of course it was fine, mr genius,” you tease, and he smiles because he knows you’re smiling too.

you can’t really remember how the rest of the conversation went. but you only remember this moment because it was the first time you realised that amidst all the times you’d pester him to go on a date with you, amidst all the times you asked him for a kiss, sae could miss you too.

SEPTEMBER 2020; [ sae comes back to japan soon ]

“hey so i was thinking, i’ll meet you at the airport?”

sae hums, “wanna see me that bad, huh?”

“shut up,” you snap at him, hating his quick tongue that so easily gets you flustered. “so i miss my handsome, successful boyfriend, big deal.”

he missed you too.

“am i just arm candy for you, y/n?”

“what? no—”

“too late. i’m offended. bye.”

then he actually hangs up on you.

it takes you half a second to pull up your message thread with him.

itoshi sae, you wanna die or something?

it takes him the same amount of time to respond to you.

y/n l/n, okay, then maybe i’d get some relief from you.

before you can even be actually offended, your phone vibrates again.

miss you too, stupid. see you tomorrow.

you can’t seem to rub the smile off your face.

FEBRUARY 2021; [ first valentines’ apart ]

it takes him three rings to pick up.

“happy valentines’, lover,” you giggle over the phone.

it’s been a few months since your about-to-go-pro soccer player boyfriend had gone back to spain, doing pro soccer player things. you miss him, especially since it’s the first time you guys are spending the romantic occasion apart.

it sucks that you couldn’t even spend new years with him. it’s okay though, you managed to video call him while you spent time with his family.

“think you got the wrong number.”

“itoshi—”

“open the door, smarty pants.”

“w-wait, what? did you send me something?”

you hurry over to your front door, not knowing what to expect. but you definitely didn’t expect sae to be there, in the flesh, sighing when you finally open your door, a pretty bouquet of flowers in his hand.

“what are you doing here?” you’re still shocked from his mere presence.

sae smirks, and you realise just how much you miss him. “think i got the wrong apartment, i was supposed to deliver these to my other girl—”

but you kiss him to shut him up. he’s full of nonsense, and so, so witty, and he’s here.

sae’s always claimed that it was not soccer stealing him from you, it was more the other way around. and he had been joking at the time he said that, but right now he thinks maybe there’s some truth to it.

if there’s anyone capable of having and getting him to willingly relinquish his attention from soccer, it’s you.

JUNE 2021; [ night of sae’s first PR event ]

“someone looks handsome,” you comment as you watch your boyfriend getting ready over the phone.

he has an entire entourage of people over at his hotel—they must be the makeup crew and stylists. his entire team is getting vip treatment for being champions of the league thanks to last week’s game. now, even more brands are trying to sponsor them and you really shouldn’t be surprised over the amount of girls going crazy over your boyfriend.

“and someone should really sleep,” sae pauses for a moment when the man beside him (presumably his stylist, because he’s double checking sae’s suit) asks a quick that your girlfriend?, to which sae says “yes.”

the man winks at you through the video. “lucky girl,” he comments, eyes back on the fabric he’s touching, “the only time i caught him smiling was while he was texting ya.”

you snicker through the phone as you watch sae’s face go beet red before frowning at you.

“he did not.”

his stylist is laughing at his reaction too. “totally did. i thought he was possessed.”

sae grabs the phone and relegates himself to the bathroom, glaring at you through the screen. he’s not mad at you, he’s just embarrassed and you know that. you’ve known him long enough now to tell his cues.

“i hope you know i hate you.”

he’s always all bark and no bite and you’re still laughing at him.

“aw, i hate you too, mr itoshi.”

“stop with the smart mouth before i find another contender for a mrs itoshi.”

you and sae had been staring at each other through the screen up until that point, when sae realised what he just said and has to look away.

“you… think i could be?”

neither you nor sae have ever broached another about the future, and sae has always been generally avoidant about it, which is why it makes you even more surprised that he’s the one who slipped up about it.

after a moment of silence, he sighs, trying to suppress a smile. it tugs at the edges of his lips, not really there but you can feel it.

“you know that one day you’ll be mrs itoshi, right?”

you don’t know that, he doesn’t know that, not until the day has come. but yeah, you really, really want to be.

OCTOBER 2022; [ sae’s birthday ]

“happy birthday, mr. itoshi,” you greet when he picks up the phone.

things had been rocky lately, admittedly. only because you and sae lived worlds apart.

sae is famous now, in both japan and europe, and it’s no surprise because he’s one of the best midfielders anyone has ever seen. his life is now full of the glitz and glam that you’re not even close to familiar with.

and you; you’re just a simple girl living in tokyo, with a normal life and normal friends and normal everything. except for the fact that sometimes people stalk you online because based on theories, you’re his girlfriend.

he was advised against confirming your identity with the press. for a myriad of reasons, apparently. and you’re fine with it, because yeah, you’re aware there are games to be played when you have his status. and it was fine with you, except for times when it’s not.

like how at his previous PR event he had to appear like he was dating some other celebrity. which was fine, but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t suck having to see your boyfriend appear intimate with someone else. even worse when you hear said someone else mention in multiple interviews that she’s always had a huge crush on him.

“thanks, though it kinda sucks today.”

but it’s fine; you’ve been with him long enough to know that sae isn’t the type to hurt you like that. so even if it’s rocky, it doesn’t stop you from loving him.

“why? i thought the guys were bringing you out drinking tonight.”

sae sighs. “that’s exactly why.”

you smile, thinking how sae is still the same sae you’ve always known. “you’ve been playing with them for more than a year now, i think one night out wouldn’t kill you, babe.”

“but they’re freaks.” and sae says that because they’re rowdy, noisy guys and he doesn’t even want to imagine them drunk.

“we both know they’re going to bother you to no end if you don’t go,” you point out, and sae relents. “and if you need an escape when you’re too tired, you could just use my name.”

you break into a grin because you know for a fact that sae uses you as an excuse to his publicist sometimes to not attend events.

“yeah, maybe i’ll tell ‘em the missus is angry,” he jokes, and you find yourself wishing you could hug him right now.

“have fun tonight, okay?” a little hesitance comes to you before you ultimately open your mouth, “i love you.”

sae chuckles, and he can’t even describe the relief that comes to him each time he hears you say those words.

“i love you too.”

DECEMBER 2022; [ the day you break ]

you don’t pick up his call.

when you saw the picture earlier, it’s like you’ve gone numb. and now everyone in the world will see the picture too. but you don’t really care. the images the paparazzi capture will die down after a while. the rumours will take longer.

right now you’re not even sure if your relationship is dead.

but you love him. you still do. and he’s still calling for what seems like the ninetieth time tonight.

this time you pick up.

“what?”

sae flinches on the other line because he’s not used to this coldness. “can i at least explain?”

you sniffle, gritting your teeth to stop your crying. “sure, why don’t you explain why i had to find out from the fucking news that you kissed someone else on your birthday?”

it’s that girl. the same celebrity you’ve seen ogling him and gushing over him and the one who has PR relations with him.

“i promise, she means nothing,” and you can hear the panic in sae’s voice. he sounds apologetic and manic and scared. “look, i-i was drunk, and she kissed me, and i pushed her off right after—”

“then why didn’t you tell me?” you yell back. because you’re sure that’s what happened. you believe him. but it wasn’t the fact that some other girl was so desperate for him that she’d do that, it was the fact that sae kept it from you.

sae can’t answer. he knows it, but he’s struggling to find the words. “i-i didn’t want you to misunderstand,” is all he can manage.

you pause for a while because you’re crying again, and sae can sense it even if you’re silent. he loves you and he’s killing himself for his stupid decisions.

“sae,” you call him, softly. “is that how much you know me?” because after all this time, you’d think he’d know better. you trusted him. a hundred percent. now? you’re not sure.

“please, y/n, i’m sorry, please just- forgive me?” and sae’s not sure how to do this. sae’s never had anyone he cared about this much other than you. you’re the only one and you forever will be. and he’s stupid and clueless outside of soccer but he’s always had you to hold his hand through this, yet now you feel further away from him than ever.

you’re quiet and he’s not sure what to expect. you’re just sniffling on the other side, not saying anything, and for the first time in his life, sae is afraid.

“babe, i—”

“don’t say it, sae,” you sigh, because you don’t want to think that he’s saying it just to appease you.

sae obeys, because he’s scared that just a little nudge would push you right off the edge. “i’m gonna fix this, okay? i’ll tell everyone that—”

“it’s fine,” you interject, your mind in shambles. you’re tired, and you really don’t know what to do about this when it’s so fresh in your heart. “i need to think things through anyway.”

“no- y/n, please, i—”

and for the first time ever, you’re the one who hangs up abruptly. then you turn off your phone because you know sae’s not going to stop but you really just don’t want to to feel bad about not picking up.

you still love him, but you’re just heartbroken right now.

sae stares at his phone after you hang up. he can hear his heart beating out of his chest and his breathing gets shallow. he tries to call you again but it’s not even ringing.

there’s only one thing he knows: he fucked up.

a stupid, stupid mistake which was grave enough to make you doubt everything and you’re right. this was on him for not opening his stupid mouth and just trusting that you’d understand.

for the first time ever, he heard what you sounded like when you’re hurt and he can’t forgive himself. not if he doesn’t do anything about it.

he gives up on trying to call you and pulls up his club’s coach’s contact instead. “sub someone else in for me tomorrow, i won’t be there.”

“what? what are you talking about? we can’t play without our star midfielder! it’s a big match against our home rivals—”

but everything he’s lecturing sae about falls on deaf ears because sae’s already packing his duffel bag and searching for his passport. he doesn’t even bother acknowledging anything before he hangs up, dialing his assistant’s number instead.

“i need to fly back to tokyo. immediately.”

his assistant’s distraught voice is apparent. “wha- um, you have a game tomorrow—”

“i don’t care. i need to fly now. get me a flight or you’re fired.”

“uh, but- um, the private jet’s not available—”

“then get me tickets on a commercial flight. i don’t fucking care about what kind of plane it is.”

yeah, because he only cares about fixing things with you. no one and nothing else, just you.

his assistant sighs because he knows he’s going to get in trouble for aiding sae. “fine, i’ll send you the details soon.”

JANUARY 2023; [ the present ]

it goes straight to voicemail. you still talk.

“you know, i hate you so much for not having a voicemail recording.”

you pause, the tears streaming down your face. you’re staring at your phone, at his instagram, at his last post. something he posted before his flight.

a picture of the both of you in private, in your room. he’s sitting behind you on the bed, his arms around your neck as he kisses your head and you take the picture.

it’s funny because he was forbidden from sharing any sort of those pictures yet he still did it anyway. you stare at the caption.

i love only you

“itoshi sae, how am i going to hear your voice now, huh?”

you’re already full-on crying now, as you have been for the last month.

“itoshi sae! talk to me, answer me!” you’re screaming but no one will ever hear you.

how can sae hear you? you’re unreasonable for expecting that.

“tell me how to reach you,” you wail into the receiver.

you’re painfully aware of what you’re getting now.

“i love you, mr. itoshi.”

there’s no one on the other line who’ll chuckle now. you can’t hear the same fondness in his voice when he says he loves you too. you can’t ever hear him joking with you again.

no more sighs, no more video calls, no more love. no more you know one day you’ll be mrs. itoshi, right?

you hang up and look at the note in your hand; something sae’s assistant passed to you on the day of his funeral.

a few weeks ago, sae asked me to get this for him. i know he wanted you to have this. before he left for tokyo, he told me to get this done for you at all costs. it was only ready a day after he left. i thought you might still like to have this. i’m sorry you have to go through this.

the gold velvet box sits heavy in your hand. it’s all of sae’s commitment to you, feelings for you—it’s all of his resolution in one tiny package and it’s heavy.

you open it, same as the countless times before.

it’s still beautiful. it’s shiny and four carats and princess cut because you were always his princess. inside the band, he has mrs itoshi engraved.

you know one day you’ll be mrs. itoshi, right?

you bring up his messages and play the last audio he sent to you.

“look, i know i fucked up and it was stupid of me to keep it from you. i’m sorry, okay? and i know you don’t want to speak to me right now but i can’t just sit around and do nothing. i love you, so i’m coming back home, and we’ll talk, and then… i promise you, nothing like this will happen again.”

you remember your last words to him and can’t help but to hate yourself. you should’ve told him one last time before you lost your chance.

if you’d just stayed on the line, he wouldn’t have come back. if he didn’t come back, he wouldn’t have gotten into that cab. if he didn’t get into that cab, he wouldn’t have been in that fatal accident in shibuya.

staring at the ring, calling his number, getting no response, visiting his plot and running into rin. and repeat. that’s all life is now.

sometimes you wear the ring to pretend he’s still here. to pretend he’s already proposed and you’re waiting for him to come back from spain.

you’re probably at voicemail #314 now.

mrs itoshi stares at you until you’re crying all over again.

you’ll never hear his voice again. never hear his laugh. never get to hug him, or pick fights with him. you’ll never get to feel his broad shoulders or his strong arms around your body. you won’t get to go home ever again.

you’ll never be mrs itoshi now.

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