#hannalanna

[flock-of-cassowaries]

[ screenshot reads: ‘Fuller said he didn’t want to tell “a queer story” but rather “wanted to tell a story of how straight men fall in love with each other”.’ Link to article .]

…who’s the second straight man?

Is it Jack?

I guess you could argue that you would have to love a man to go ice-fishing….

Or… was it Zeller?

I mean, that would be weird, because I can’t even remember him and Will even having a conversation, outside that one scene (in s2e7, “Is Your Social Worker In That Horse?”) where Z. apologizes for having believed Will was the Ripper…

…who was the other straight man, Brian??? WHO????

I know it isn’t Jimmy Price, because you simply do not cast the most famous Canadian homosexual of his generation to play an implicitly straight character; or, I mean, maybe you do, but not if they’re Scott Thompson, because as much as I love him, that is just not a power he has as an actor.

And, as much as the Hannalanna chemistry actually was kind of hot to me, if Hannibal Lecter were ever to self-identify as a straight man, I’m pretty damn sure Chappell Roan would just materialize in a puff of smoke, like “WHO HATH SUMMONED ME TO SING MY EXCELLENT SONG?”*

Fortunately for Ms. Roan, though, I can’t ever picture him actually saying that (outside of a scenario where he’s trying to con Alana into giving him an alibi and a way to make Will absolutely crazy).

* And like, Chappell Roan’s indignation in the event of her summoning would be totally warranted. She has a right to private time. We shouldn’t me be yanking her through the ether to sing “Good Luck Babe” when she’s just trying to like, do a crossword puzzle or whatever. That is absolutely not fair to her.

But if NBC-Hannibal Lecter were to assert straightness, it would just happen. That’s just metaphysics. I don’t make the rules.