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o-sachi · 3 months ago

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Dance With Me? - Oneshot (Request)

ᯓ ume tasks sugishita to accompany his little sister to her dance except... they kinda hate each other.... ᯓ character; sugishita kyotaro (wind breaker) ᯓ tags; reader is ume's biological little sis, tsundere sugi, enemies to lovers-ish fluff, sfw, afab reader, no y/n

@pixelcafe-network

It's not news to anyone that Sugishita would do absolutely anything that Ume would ask of him—tending the garden, patrolling the town, hanging out at the cafe. Done, done, and done.

But there was one thing that he—with utmost reluctance—would not do gladly even if the revered Umemiya Hajime told him to.

And that was to interact with Ume's little sister.

You'd think that siblings would at least be similar to each other, but you were nothing like your brother. While the two of you were both outgoing and friendly, Ume was a bit more gentle and easygoing while you were... a bit of a firecracker to say the least.

Ume stood in front of Sugishita. He clasped his hands tightly as he pleaded with the younger man. They were in the middle of gardening so peacefully when he decided to ruin it for them.

"Pretty please? If you can't do it for her then do it for me."

Damn it. Sugishita huffed out. When he put it like that—there was no way he could disappoint his favorite upperclassman. But maybe... if he started suggesting other people, then that should be sort of like helping too... right?

Ume sighed, exhausted from begging. Not to mention, you were already on his ass about this whole situation. The thing is—there was a school dance that everyone at your school was looking forward to. But you had to bring a plus one. Otherwise, people would judge you for not having one. High school works in ridiculous ways.

Initially, Ume already offered to go. But who the hell goes to a high school dance with their brother?

"I can't ask Sakura because he'd explode before he even gets to the dance. She thinks of Nirei as a brother too and Suo intimidates her too much."

"Kaji-san?" Sugishita adds.

"No dice," Ume sighs again, placing his hands on his hips. "She wants to go with someone in the same year as her.

And asking her enemy would be any better? Sugishita felt his heart being gripped and not in a good way. Ume's puppy eyes really had no effect, though Sugishita was starting to feel bad. Maybe one night with you wouldn't be so abysmal.

"...Fine."

"Hooray!" Ume almost jumped up for joy as he finally had some good news to bring home to you...

Or not—because you may have thwacked him over the head with a book after he told you that the one and only Sugishita Kyotaro would be accompanying to the most important event of your high school life.

But there was nothing else to do as both of you stood outside of your school. Ume had just dropped you off after what was the most awkward car ride ever. Your brother talked the whole time—hyping up the both of you while neither of you even talked.

"So..."

"So what?"

Sugishita clicked his tongue. You haven't even exchanged more than 5 words tonight and you were already showing attitude. "Aren't we gonna go inside?"

"I dunno, do YOU even wanna go inside? 'Cuz I don't."

"But Umemiya-san told me this was important to you."

Your crossed your arms and looked off to the side, embarrassed to be put into this situation. "Well, it is... but now I don't care anymore."

What a brat, he thought. But as annoying as you were right now—Sugishita had promised Ume that he'd make sure you would have fun. The longer the arrangement simmered in his mind, the stronger his resolve became to stay true to that promise.

Never mind that you two were oil and water. If he had something to prove to Ume, then maybe the same could be said for you. Sugishita wanted to shut you up after all.

"C'mon," he insists, grabbing your hand and dragging you into the building.

"Hey—what the f—wait!" Though your tried to resist, his grip was too strong. He was hellbent on getting you inside and showing you that your brattiness was making you miss out.

Your resistance was futile as you found yourself in the event hall where the reception was asking for your ticket. You begrudgingly held it in your fist before Sugishita swiped it.

"Here. Two tickets."

The attendant examined the small pieces of paper. Then, the two of you were finally at the dance. The lights were dimmed and upbeat music played while people danced. A sigh of relief escapes you, thankful that it wasn't a slow dance yet.

As the newcomers, eyes were on you. Of course, people were curious who this tall and scary guy was and how he knew you. The guys were sizing him up while the other girls were whispering among themselves.

You noticed this all, but your "date" was seemingly oblivious to it all.

"Aren't you gonna go and dance with your friends?"

"What about you?"

"What about me? When did YOU care about ME?" he asked, emphasizing the two words that never got along well.

Crossing your arms, you looked around the place. You looked forward to this event for weeks—maybe even months. But here you were, sulking. But why? You came in a nice dress with a date who doesn't look too shabby. Did you really hate him in the first place or...

"My friends are just gonna ask me about you and I don't want to explain all of that."

Sugishita scoffs. "Just tell them we're friends. No need to go on a whole rant about how you hate me."

That catches your attention and you crane your head to look up at him. "Okay, first of all, you're the one who hates me. Not the other way around."

"And when did I say that?"

"Well, you—" pause. "I just—" another pause. "You just seem to dislike my presence. I can tell. I'm not stupid."

He grumbles, letting his arms fall to the side. It completely slipped your mind how much he was talking today.

"You're annoying and you bother me a lot but I don't hate you," he admits. And somehow that sincere concession has your heart beating a little faster than normal.

"Well whatever. I don't ca—"

"Do you hate me?"

The question catches you off-guard. That's the million dollar question. "No... I guess not. You're just not the most receptive to my actions so I think you're weird. Like something's wrong with you."

"Maybe if you respected my boundaries and didn't annoy me all the time. Maybe I'd like you."

The air stills. Momentum kept building up and that's what he blamed for the last few words he spoke. Then again, "liking" someone doesn't have to be taken in a romantic context. It would be your fault if you misunderstood.

With all your bickering, you were late to notice that the song had slowed. People had calmed down and gone in pairs. Hands were attached to waists and eyes were peering into each other. It was starting.

Sugishita took a few steps forward before turning to look back at you. He held his hand out. "Dance with me?"

You stared at him, dumbfounded. Was this guy so devoted to your brother that he'd throw all his dignity away as soon as he asks him to dance with his little sister? It was both impressive and ridiculous at the same time.

"What about your boundaries?"

He shook his head, shoving his hand in his pocket instead. "Fine, be the loser that stays in the sidelines."

This was nothing like the Sugishita that you know. He wasn't acting right that it was almost concerning. But... maybe you were both crazy because as soon as he turned his back to you—you were chasing after him.

Linking your arm with his, you tugged at him a bit. "You're the loser. Not me."

A sly smirk crosses his face. "Let's see if you manage not to step on my foot then, Loser."

#wind breaker #wind breaker x reader #sugishita x reader #sugishita kyotaro #kyotaro sugishita #pixelcafenetwork #—☕️sachi #—☕️wind breaker #—☕️sugishita kyotaro #—☕️milktea

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eternal-evergreens · 5 months ago

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may I request a yandere hajime kashimo x fem reader or yandere gato x fem reader if you haven't read the manga yet

｡⁠*ﾟ⁠+*⁠.⁠✧ "Arc Flash" ｡⁠*ﾟ⁠+*⁠.⁠✧

Post format: drabble

Paring: Yandere! Hajime Kashimo x Fem! Reader

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: major injury, slight gore, period-typical misogyny (nothing from Hajime), cross-dressing, forced marriage

You were once one of the strongest sorcerers of your time, though your days of glory have long since passed you by.

You were twenty-five when you fought what you thought to be your last battle. Twenty-five when you sustained a life-altering injury. Twenty-five when you lost it all.

Hajime Kashimo. Your childhood friend turned sour. Endearing when you were children, his fixation on you began to verge on unnerving as you entered adolescence. By the time you had entered adulthood, it had bloomed into an obsession from which you could not escape.

“Let’s get married,” he told you on your eighteenth birthday. He wasn’t asking for your opinion. If you wanted to get out of this, you’d need a better excuse than ‘I don’t want to’.

“I can’t,” you said flatly, luggage in hand. You needed to get going before noon, and he was blocking your only exit. “It’s a tradition in my family for sorcerers to go on a pilgrimage of strength once they enter adulthood. You know this.”

“I’m not like them,” you say. “I need to get stronger.”

“The girls usually choose to get married instead, though.”

“You don't even have a technique!” You pause.

That's not quite true, though he has no way to know it. You never told him about it, after all.

“...Even more reason to get stronger.”

You do have a technique, but you've only just recently discovered it.

“You won’t need to get stronger once you’re under my protection.”

Most sorcerers become aware of their technique around five or six…

“And what if someone attacks me while you’re away? I’m going. End of story.”

…but it's a different story if their technique requires the use of a medium that is hard to come by.

“When you come back, then,” he says. You give a vague indication of agreement, and he lets you pass.

Corpses aren't exactly common playthings for a child, after all.

Most pilgrimages of this type end after a maximum of three years. However, returning was never something you planned on doing. Your family scorned you for not being a meek and obedient daughter, and Hajime had chased off the only friends you had. There was nothing left for you back in the village. The pilgrimage was largely nothing more than an excuse for your escape.

Of course, that doesn’t mean it was all for show. You were’nt lying when you said you wanted to get stronger, after all.

Within just a year of your departure, rumours of “The Masked Sorcerer” began to circulate around Japan. Despite the growing fame, you weren’t worried about being caught. After all, [First] [Last] was a female sorcerer of humble origins with no innate technique, completely different from the Masked Sorcerer, an anonymous male who possessed a mastery over corpse manipulation.

After seven years of independence, you thought you'd never see anyone from your past ever again. But perhaps the years of separation had worn on your memory; you seemed to have forgotten that Hajime was a junkie for battle.

It was a relatively simple attack from behind. So easy to dodge that you suspect it was meant more as a declaration than a genuine attempt on your life. You reach for your katana, prepared to take your assailant down in one blow, however, a familiar voice freezes you in place.

“You’re the masked sorcerer, right?” He asked. “I've been looking for you.” Hajime lunges for you, his cursed energy crackling around him. You jump to create distance, narrowly avoiding a collision. Snapping out of your momemtary stupor, this time you don’t hesitate to unsheathe your katana and swing it down in one fluid motion. At the same time, you summon a horde of skeletons to join you in battle. Skeletons don’t make for the strongest fighters, but bones are the most resistant to electric conduction. That makes them perfect for fighting against Hajime’s cursed energy.

“So this is corpse manipulation!” Hajime exclaims, leaping out of your sword’s path. “I’ve never seen anything like it!” Your skeletons swarm him, each armed with weapons made of bone. Hajime releases a surge of electricity, but the skeletons hardly react. “Not bad.” He grins. “You even accounted for the special property of my cursed energy. However,” Hajime drops his staff and raises his arms to his chest, making a hand sign you recognise instantly. How could you forget? You were the first person he showed it off to.

“Hey, look at this! I just learned how to make explosions!” Hajime, age twelve, told you, guiding you by the hand as he ran with you across an open field. “[First], [First], look!”

“I’m looking, I’m looking,” you say. Hajime smiles, letting go of your hand to free up his own, he places his left palm over the back of his right hand, making a sign that resembles a butterfly’s wings. “How does it work?”

“So you take a bunch of electricity like this to create a sort of field, yeah? Then you pulse more electricity through that field, and then…” In a second, the tree standing to your left explodes as if struck by lightning, its stump catches on fire, and its branches fly out in all directions, many of them also on fire.

“Woah! That’s amazing, Hajime!” Hajime puffs out his chest with pride.

“I’ve even thought of a name for it!” He tells you. “I’m calling it—”

“Arc flash.”

In no time at all, the force of the explosion rips your skeletons apart, leaving nothing left between you and him. You lunge forward, katana in hand. He readies his staff to block your attack, and the two of you exchange blows with lightning speed.

“What’s your name?” He asks. You don’t answer. Your voice would give you away. A current passes through your body, shocking the nerves. You lock up, and Hajime reaches to remove your mask. In a flash, you sever his arm. But the damage is done. In an effort to protect your identity, you gave it away instead.

It’s Hajime’s turn to be frozen now. He looks down at the stump of his arm as blood gushes from the cleany cut arteries, then he looks back to you. “That was…”

New Shadow Style: Simple Domain.

By creating a small domain around your body, you’re able to automate your movements, attacking and reacting to attacks faster than you ever could on your own.

It’s not something you came up with, but, having no innate technique to rely on, it was basically your signature back home.

Shit. You messed up.

“Let’s change the rules,” he says, healing his injured hand and picking his staff back up. “If I win, you’ll promise to marry me, just like you did back then.” No point in hiding it now, you figure. You rip off your mask and throw it to the ground.

“And if I win, you’ll die where you stand.”

“Deal.” The two of you launch towards each other in a blaze of fiery passion. You fight well, but it isn’t long before you burn through all of your skeleton reserves. Regular corpses, though stronger, are more suceptible to electric pulse, and don’t last much longer. With nothing but melee combat left at your disposal, it was only a matter of time before a well-placed electrical current sent you out of commission.

That bastard. He targeted your spinal cord on purpose, didn’t he?

“Partial paraplegia,” the doctor said. “It means that while you still retain some form of movement in your legs, it will be quite difficult for you to ever walk again. And even then, only for short distances.”

You wanted to kill him. That good-for-nothing husband of yours was just about as bad as it can get. But a sorcerer’s word is their pride. So you agreed to go back to his residence as his newly disabled wife, though the humiliation and shame just might send you into an early grave.

“Well,” he says, grinning as he wheels you out of the office. “Guess you can’t run away anymore, huh?”

#yandere jjk #yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere x reader #yandere hajime kashimo #hajime kashimo #hajime kashimo x reader #yandere jjk x reader #jjk #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader

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omiomi-kyun · 11 months ago

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03:14 — all these little things...

IWAIZUMI HAJIME was someone you look up to. He was considerate and knows how to take care of the people around him. Someone that even the teachers can rely on.

He’s an admirable person that you didn't even wonder why he’s always surrounded by people—especially your fellow students.

When you heard that there was an available spot in the volleyball team as a manager, you immediately took off and tried your luck.

But who would've thought that this would take you several hours before actually managing to stand in front of table where the coach and the members were at.

Once you met the gaze of the team's coach, you stood frozen on the spot. You could feel the forming of cold sweat on your forehead, but you tried to remain calm.

“See you tomorrow,” Coach Irihata said before calling the attention of one of the reserve players.

Your body shook before you even managed to respond to what the coach had said.

EVER SINCE THAT DAY, you were able to spend most of your free time with the team. You were there to assist them with menial task, and you were also there to cheer them up after their match with Shiratorizawa.

“We're almost at the end of the line,” Oikawa suddenly said while your friend group was walking you home. “What are your plans?”

“Oi, Oikawa, are you nervous?” Maki joked.

“You're not scared of Ushijima, are you?” Mattsun added while grinning.

“Leave me alone!” Oikawa began before ranting about how much he loathed ‘those geniuses.’

You watched the three of them from behind as they create ruckus in a quiet street. Although it was already nighttime, you weren't that worried to stay behind them.

All thanks to him. Hajime.

“Now that I think about it, have you finally decided the course you'll be taking in college?”

You glanced at him.

“Well, I'm not sure yet,” you responded. “How about you? Will you still be playing in college?”

He looked at you with a smile.

“I think I'm going overseas. I'm not sure though if I'll be playing in a competitive level, but I am sure that I won’t abandon this game.”

“I wonder what would happen to us in the future.” You both look at the three dorks walking ahead of you two. “Especially since that guy who's deadset on following his idol overseas.”

“Hm... I wonder too.”

SEVERAL YEARS LATER, you found yourself in a bar, sitting in a stool while watching the match between Hajime and Oikawa.

As the announcers were introducing the players who might turn the tides during the game, they started to mention some information that touched the sore spots in your team’s heart.

You chuckled while listening to Maki and Yahaba's response.

Who would've thought that Iwaizumi would become the trainer of Japan's National Volleyball Team?

“Ah... you still have that sparkling eyes,” Maki pointed out, making everyone in your group turn to you. “He's been here for awhile now, but you still haven't told him yet?”

“Oh, what's this? Is manager looking at a certain trainer that barely got his own screentime?” Mattsun added with a grin.

“Leave me alone you two.”

You lifted the mug of beer, a poor attempt in hiding your embarrassment.

When did they caught on? You were sure that you were able to hide your feelings towards Hajime for so long. You were keeping yourself in check for years.

So, how...?

“I won't spoil anything, but... I don't think anything could go wrong if you tell him about your feelings.”

You look at Maki who kept his gaze on the screen.

“He's not that dense, you know.”

For some reason, their words started to make sense.

“I-Is that why he's avoiding me?” you asked, looking at Maki, then at Mattsun. “I messed up, didn't I? Oh no...”

Before you know it, you were already on your way back to the hotel where you're staying at with the rest of your friend group.

Maki and Mattsun, feeling guilty and responsible for your drunkenness, decided to stay with you. Making sure that you won't do anything stupid.

“What will I do if Iwaizumi push me away? Should I change everything? My face, my name? But I like my name!”

Unfortunately for them, you were that kind of drunk.

“This is why I told you to stop them from drinking too much.”

You weren't sure if you're tripping, but you could hear his stern voice in your room. You tried to stsy still as you hide underneath the blanket, but Iwaizumi already know where you are.

He also watched you hide underneath the blanket.

“They're a mess when they're this drunk.” Then, you heard him sigh. “Let me get some things. I'll take care of them.”

However, before he could even take a step further, you began to wail.

“Waaaaah! He really hates me now... What should I do? He's leaving me behind...”

You were more than just a mess.

“Hajime don't leave! I don't like you anymore. I... hic... promise...” you shouted while sobbing.

Hajime sighed while shaking his head.

“I'll take care of her,” he told the two before walking towards you.

The mattress near where you were sitting on dipped. With swollen eyes, you looked at him.

“Ha... jime...”

“Silly,” he whispered as he wiped your tear-stained cheeks with his rough fingertips. “I told you to stay sober until after the game, but you didn't listen.”

You look down on your fingers, but Hajime was quick to cup your cheeks and made you meet his gaze.

“You probably don't know how much I like you.”

Your heart flutter.

“From that moment you sheltered those kittens on that rainy afternoon, to the day you started to stay with us through all those ups and downs as our manager...”

Tears began to form in your eyes once again.

“My feelings only grew over the years. Even during those years when I was studying in the US. You were the only one in my heart all these years.”

You started to wipe your own tears, but it seems like your tearducts have no intention of stopping those tears from running down your cheeks.

“I thought I was the only one who felt that way...” you sobbed.

Once again, you heard him chuckled before feeling his warm embrace around you.

“Silly,” he said. “But I love all these little things about you.”

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seekers-who-are-lovers · 5 days ago

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Something tells me that if ever they decide to animate “The Crow of Paradise/The Paradise of a Crow”, this could be made into a film.

Or a live action?

I am on the first pages and I am seeing à la Wong Kar Wai scenes on my head with a young-ish Takuya Kimura as Hajime Yasuhara. (Okay, probably i am still holding on to his Howl voice, but he’s not only that.)

When it comes to manga adaptation, however, Natsumi Matsuzaki admitted that adapting it to manga is a challenge.

Matsuzaki : "The Crow of Paradise" came out right after we started the comic version of "Master"... I didn't know anything about the content of (Paradise), so after reading it, I thought, "I've gotten myself into something serious."

[Note: "The Crow of Paradise" is the first book in the second part of the Yatagarasu series, released in September 2020.]

… I was reading it at a café in Ikebukuro, and as soon as I finished reading it, I called (Abe-san) over... Abe was like, "Oh no, I've been called out!" (laughs). So, when I went to meet her, she looked at me with sparkling eyes as if to complain, and I thought, "Oh, good. It seems like 'The Crow of Paradise' will be okay..." (laughs).

Matsuzaki: But after that came out, and then the next one, 'The Crows of Remembrance,' I started to think, "This is getting difficult to adapt into a comic..." Is that so...?

…

Abe: From the perspective of the original author, this work is part of a series, so there is an overarching theme for the entire series. However, if you focus solely on that, each individual work might end up being incomplete.

Matsuzaki : That's right. It becomes blurred... The theme is too large.

Abe: That's why I create "major themes," "medium themes," and "minor themes." For a standalone piece, I focus only within that piece. For a main work, I focus only within that main work, and I resolve the "minor themes." But when you connect them all, a larger theme emerges... It's like creating a "mosaic picture."

Matsuzaki: But I haven't been told what the picture will look like. I try not to ask about the theme of a standalone piece, the theme of a main work, or the themes going forward. Instead, I interpret the words and events written in the current original work myself and try to create a coherent narrative.

(This q&a talk is included on the fourth volume of the manga.)

#yatagarasu #Chisato Abe #Natsumi Matsuzaki #the crow of paradise #natsumi is the No. 1 fan of the Yatagarasu series tbh #her thoughts on it are detailed and interesting and revealing if you look back at her Twitter from the 2019 and onward #before the announcement of the anime though #I don’t begrudge the anime tbh I love it to bits and it is the reason I am what I am right now #their interpretation of yukiya and his relationship with wakamiya #the character designs #the story #it is on another level #one Japanese fan I asked told me she’d love to see the succeeding books from the first part in the cinemas

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nikki-152006 · 4 months ago

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kokonoi hajime X reader

(from Ameliorate EXTRAS!)

"How much longer do you want to wait?" your friends are worried about you. They glance over towards Inui seated to the side, hoping he'd try to console you but the boy hardly lifts his head.

"He'll be here any second now." you're smiling at them, sure that he'll make it but deep inside even you know Kokonoi isn't coming.

"Ring him up again, Inui." Sano Emma, a friend of yours has her hands folded at her chest. There's nothing but a frown on her face, "He's two hours late already. If he doesn't reach in ten minutes, we're gonna celebrate on our own."

"We'll wait." you look at her with a firm gaze though your irises are twitching, begging you to allow them to let out their pains.

"We won't." she's more definite than you, "If you're really as important of a friend to him, he wouldn't have missed your birthday at least. I don't want to break your heart today of all days, but please, (Name)-chan. You need to face it."

"What nonsense." you laugh awkwardly, looking over at Inui for support but he still doesn't react, "Koko-kun's gonna come. He always does."

"He always doesn't have a girlfriend." Tachibana silently points out, "Men's priorities change once they're dating. You're the one who told me that last year, remember?"

Your lips twitch. You don't want to accept it. You don't want to cry over him on your birthday. You don't want to cry at all- it's the others who'd be put in a more uncomfortable situation than you.

"(Name)-chan.. " Emma sighs as you look over at Inui again, hoping him to intervene and support you, "do you really think Inui's gonna back you up when Kokonoi-san's probably on a date with his sister at the moment?"

Inui's eyes twitch, he looks away.

Your mouth opens, then closes. There's a deep silence in the room.

"Is he?" there's too much of pain in your voice for even you to handle, your eyes get glassier by the second.

Inui doesn't have it in him to reply to you. He's always known of your feelings for Kokonoi but he's always thought Kokonoi and Akane had a deeper bond having known each other from their childhood days.

But at the moment, when he hears nothing but the chords of a broken instrument in your voice, Inui wishes there was something he could do to bring Kokonoi here. No matter what it took.

Tears flow down your cheeks, slowly and slowly staining your cheeks with the dampness of ache. There isn't anything you feel at the moment other than every strand of your heart's muscles being torn apart one by one.

" ... I'm sorry.. " Inui had only wished to cover the date part with some lie and make you believe Kokonoi couldn't come because of some hurdles, but he doesn't wish to keep you living in a lie.

Kokonoi Hajime, a close friend of yours, chose to be on a date with Inui Akane, another close friend of yours on your birthday night. This is the reality.

Inui knows keeping secrets would only make the load of ache in you heavier by passing days, so he doesn't say anything but "I'm sorry", he's not someone who deserves to say anything after all.

"Fuck it all." Yuzuha slams her glass of juice down, "Oi, Inui, " he looks up at her with a defeated look, "piss off."

Inui nods and gets up. He knows it's for the best of you.

Kokonoi can't shut up about how familiar him and Akane look. Of course the sight of him is painful for you. Inui sighs and quietly walks out through the door.

He feels guilty, so very guilty. But then again, there's nothing he can do.

"That's it!" she comes and cups your cheeks, "No one's crying today! It's gonna be a girls' night out. There will be no boys."

"Yeah!" Emma agrees, "Those assholes can go fuck themselves! We're gonna go out and have fun today!"

But you're not in the condition to listen to them trying to cheer you up. You feel torn. Shredded.

You don't understand why you're never good enough for him, you can't figure out what you haven't done for him. Why things turned out like this- him dating Akane is okay, he's always loved her. But he doesn't even bother to even look at you anymore.

You've become non-existent for him, as if the approximate decade you've spent with him doesn't mean anything at all.

It hurts.

"Get up." Tachibana grabs your arm, "Stop crying, (Name)-chan, get up."

You don't want the few friends who do care for you to be left with nothing but uneasiness today, so you try. Though it's hard, though it hurts even more, you try to hold your tears.

"We're going out." Yuzuha says, grabbing her bag and keys from the kitchen counter, "We'll have fun together. We're friends too."

You nod, smile forming on your face but nothing but ache inside. Your heart feels as if it has been scratched a hundred times, as if each of these scratches throbs in it's own blood.

All this time, you tried to keep this inside you, and now it had erupted. You'd been trying to console yourself all this time, but nothing could pull you away from the truth now.

Kokonoi doesn't care about you. At all.

Not even as a friend.

Not even as someone he knows.

Not as anything.

You don't even realize walking with the girls into Yuzuha's car- your brain and heart in a dead frenzy.

"Let's drink." your lips are dry, you feel them while speaking, "I don't want to remember this night."

"If that's what you wish, sweetheart." Yuzuha drives towards her favorite club. She's determined to get you wasted too- not even she wants you to remember your twenty-first birthday as such.

If only Koko-kun cared to at least show up....

You're mad at Akane too, but there's not much you can say to her. Something turned off all your affection for her the moment she and Kokonoi had started dating.

It is natural, you've been told. It's because you're envious, because you wish it was you instead of her.

I always have...

Emma suddenly says she's gonna ask her brother to pick you all up and make sure everyone's home safe later. It disrupts your line of thought.

You've lost too many tears to be stable in your self now. You feel thoroughly dehydrated.

If only this pain would go away...

You unknowingly clutch your heart.

It's not like you to react this way to things. You've always been calm and logical, always think first and act later. It was Kokonoi who'd make you stutter in words and actions.

It was always him who'd make you act out of character- blush, get embarrassed, get self conscious, and what not.

And look at this.

It's him now because of whom you're sitting and crying when you should be celebrating.

No, it's not his fault I chose to be blind.

Kokonoi had been showing this behavior since over a year now- that's even before he started dating Akane. You were the one to choose to let it all past you, it's your fault you tried to run from reality.

"We're here."

You're more than relieved when Yuzuha says it, and are the first one to open the car door and step out.

Yuzuha looks worried about you but she's definite a glass of alcohol would dissolve all your pain into nothingness. She knows you'll wake up the next day and the pain will still be there, but at least you save your birthday night.

Everyone is quick to enter, heels clacking against the floor.

The inside of the club carries a crazy mood matching the frenzy in your mind. The beats of the music nullify your heart by their vibrations.

You inhale deeply, then exhale.

This is what I need.

Tachibana chooses not to drink, but you, Emma and Yuzuha down yourself with a couple of drinks before heading towards the dance floor.

There, you unleash everything boiling inside you as dance moves. They're sad, anyone sober would've been able to tell, but that's the thing you love the most about clubs.

No one is sober. Everyone in clubs is downed with some or the other sort of drinks trying to suppress or ignite some or the other sort of pain or joy. Everyone's the same.

Yuzuha runs a hand through her hair and looks around. She can't spot you anymore and it scares here.

Emma a little distance away from her is looking for you too.

The dance floor is wide, there's a massive crowd gathered there, they don't know how to find you through it all.

Towards the other side of the dance floor, you've just fallen on some dude. He barely flinches as your weight rests on his- you're too drunk to process your own actions now.

With hazy, irritated dry eyes, you look up at the guy- he has a pretty face as far as you can tell.

A nice jaw, eyebrows raised and arched, black hair flowing down his face over to your own. He's pretty, but he's not him.

"Do you need me to take you to the side?"

It's not even his voice.

"Are you okay?"

Those hands aren't like his.

"Excuse me, madam, can you hear me?"

But who gives a shit if it isn't Kokonoi.

He wouldn't be here for me anyways, right?

You kiss him.

Although surprised by the sudden contact, the guy kisses back. It brings you back to how everyone's the same in clubs- looking for some or the other sort of escape or joy.

You wish to run away from your heart, and the guy wishes to run towards his own.

Using him as support, your manage to straighten up, but then lose balance and fall on him again. "Take me away." the words are slurred but they manage to leave your lips.

He does.

He takes your hand, gives you the balance you need and takes you outside the club.

The night air is chilly but fails to calm the heat risen up your body. You giggle, the guy grins.

"What's your name?" his hand his around your waist to help you walk, yours are gripping one shoulder of his from behind and the other his forearm of the free arm.

"Me?" your vision is just as hazy, brain just as fuzzy, but you don't feel pain anymore.

Or rather, you feel too much to know what is pain anymore.

"Yeah?" the guy turns towards you.

You let go of his hold and skip ahead, then turn around with a giggle and your arms wide open.

You're drunk- you can let yourself do anything today.

"(Name)." you say, "I'm (Name)."

"That's a pretty name," the guy catches up to you with smile on his face, "it suits you, (Name)-chan."

You giggle again, "Koko-kun never calls me by my first name, you know. I'm not important to him anyways."

The guy halts, realization hitting him. He doesn't want to take a shot at wooing a heartbroken girl- he feels guilty all of a sudden.

"Do you not like me too?" you look so innocent with your eyes wide and lips trembling in a slur "Did I make you sad?"

Baji Keisuke sighs and runs a hand through his hair, "You didn't." he says, "Would you like to join me for a walk?"

You look at him again, trying to figure whether there's any dislike on his expressions but when your brain doesn't work enough to tell, you just shrug and decide to go with him.

"Should I get you some water?" Baji wants you to get sober enough to realize what you're doing, "You're eyes won't hurt after that."

You let out a small hum. "Okay."

Kokonoi doesn't like it when he's making out with Akane and she suddenly finds something to talk about. He doesn't hate it- it's cute, but sometimes he wishes it was something more related to them than other people.

"Isn't that (Name)-chan?"Akane is peeking outside the car window onto the street where a girl is walking alongside a guy while clasping his arm, "Why is she- oh shit, it's her birthday today!"

"Yeah, yeah it is." Kokonoi sighs, his eyes lazily following hers to see your figure walk with difficulty as a guy takes you along.

"Wait, you remembered?" Akane's eyes furrow, "Why didn't you remind me then? We should've wished her at least."

"She's not a baby, " Kokonoi says, "and besides, " he places his finger under her chin and brings her face towards him, "how dare you think of looking here and there when I'm in front of you."

Kokonoi is much taller than Akane now- he's much stronger and much more dominant.

"What can I say, " she bites her lip, "I have this bad habit."

"Shall I fix it for you?" Kokonoi grins, his hand trailing down Akane's waist.

"Please do."

Before he indulges himself completely with Akane, his eyes go up in instinct. You and the guy have just walked under a streetlight- he can see the guy clearly now.

Kokonoi's mouth hangs. "Isn't that Baji Keisuke?"

Akane frowns but gets up to look. "He's a safe guy, right? He wouldn't hurt her or something?"

"I doubt." Kokonoi frowns, "But I hate that asshole."

"Should we stop them then?" Akane asks, "You wouldn't want him to get a shot on our friend, right?"

Kokonoi's eyes furrow, "Nah, it doesn't matter as much. He wouldn't do anything wrong, don't worry about it, Akane-chan."

She hums in doubt but chooses to go with whatever Kokonoi tells her- she trusts him blindly after all.

Inui sits silently in his office. Kokonoi's office is right opposite to his and he can see Akane sit on the table in front of him through the glass door.

They're chatting.

Inui sighs and closes his file. Right in the middle of the lines of cubicles between his and Kokonoi's office is your cubicle.

He can see the back of your chair- you're buried inside, not wanting to have even a glimpse of what's going on in the office across.

Inui feels guilty, but he doesn't understand whether or not he should. His best friend and sister are dating, there's no greater joy he can have. There's no better guy Akane can have after all.

But he doesn't feel the joy he should. Inui feels like he made a mistake.

He walks outside the office and strolls over to your cubicle.

"(Name)-chan."

He doesn't want you to turn around- if you do, you'll be reminded of Akane and it would hurt, "I'm sorry for yesterday.... Are you okay?"

There's only a hum in response.

"Is everything okay?"

Another hum.

" .... I'll be in my office if you need something."

There's no response.

Inui sighs and turns around to walk towards his office but something repels him.

Without even thinking about it, he takes a turn towards Kokonoi's office and hurries inside.

"Akane-nii chan." he says, "Get off the table please, we're at work and there's a decorum we must follow."

"I'll draw the curtains." Kokonoi waves him off but Inui doesn't listen.

"We're in an office, there's rules around here. I'm not letting you both get away with stuff other employees can't. Please keep your affections for your own time, I don't want any disturbance during work."

"Jeez, Seishu." Akane sighs, "You take work too seriously sometimes," but she does get off, "fine, I'll see you later, Hajime-kun."

Kokonoi stares at Inui after Akane is gone. "What's up with you today?"

"Nothing." Inui isn't in the mood to talk to him at all. It's not like he blames Kokonoi, but there's not an ounce of patience left in him to handle the guilt, your heartbreak and Kokonoi being an ass all at once.

"I'm asking you something, Inupi." Kokonoi frowns, "What's up, why this attitude?"

"Get back to work." Inui leaves the cabin before Kokonoi can reply, but Kokonoi senses something's wrong and he's not letting it go all that easily.

"Everyone!" he enters the hall and announces, "In appreciation of your hard work, you all are allowed to take the rest of the day off!"

Inui knows exactly what's coming up after Kokonoi's announcement. He wishes you leave just in time to not fall between the argument coming up.

There's cheers from the employees as they pack their stuff and leave in groups. It takes a little time for them to leave, Inui's gaze is focused on the one cubicle Kokonoi is unintentionally standing in front of.

You don't step out in attempt to avoid seeing him.

"Are you not going to leave, (L/N)?" Kokonoi notices you a moment later, "I said everyone's dismissed."

Inui sees your shoulders slump as you pack your stuff and get up to leave despite it meaning you'll have to see him. Inui wonders if Kokonoi knows of the emotions you have now.

He wonders if Kokonoi would notice you trying to avoid seeing him but something tells him he won't. Kokonoi isn't the slightest bothered about you to notice.

"Oh, and say hi to that bastard Baji for me, will you?" the hall is already empty, you three are the only ones there, "Tell him he's not winning the next time we- "

The sound of a loud slap cuts off Kokonoi's words.

You bag hits the floor, and Inui's heart falls along with it.

This is the worst case scenario.

He rushes towards them to diffuse the situation but Kokonoi signals him to halt. Inui doesn't know what to do- he doesn't want you to be hurt any further. He doesn't want to live in guilt anymore.

"How do you know I know him?" your voice is hoarse from the events of the previous day, "How do you know I know Baji?"

Kokonoi looks like he's holding onto the last thread of his patience, "You were out with him last night."

"You know I didn't know him." your voice gives away the way your heart wails, "You saw me being drunk and going somewhere with a guy I didn't even know...."

"I did, so?" Kokonoi's fist is balled up, he's trying hard not to unleash his anger.

"What?" Inui turns to him, "You- what if something happened to her? What if that guy did something? Koko, what's wrong with you! Why didn't you- "

"It was Baji, Inupi." Kokonoi spits out, his anger getting the best of him, "That guy wouldn't do shit... and you." he turns to you, "Stop fucking expecting someone to be there to take care of you. If you don't want a situation like that, how about not drink and get wasted like a club hoe."

Inui punches him.

And that, not once.

Kokonoi is too pissed to not respond.

Akane has just entered the hall- she's a receptionist and she'd noticed all the employees leaving- she runs over to Inui, gasping and asking them to stop fighting.

You can hear Akane beg you to help her separate the two- you're the stronger one of the two of you, but you don't even bother looking at her.

You just pick up your bag and turn around and leave, not glancing back even once.

There's a knock on your door that evening.

You walk over to it with a piece of toast in your mouth and open the door to reveal Akane standing behind with an awkward expression.

"Hey, (Name)-chan... I... uhm, so... Seishu told us everything... I'm so sorry- " you close the door at her face, lock it and then walk back to the couches.

Not a single part of you wants to see her anymore, and poor Seishu gets the damage- he looks too much like her and you don't want him to remind you of her.

You're done with green eyes and blond hair and sweet voices but you still cannot come to hate anything about Kokonoi.

It's unfair to Akane, you know it, but there's nothing you can do to control it. She's the one who has always been nice and kind to you and Kokonoi is the one who abandoned you in a hollow friendship, yet still, you cannot come to reduce your hate for her or increase that for him.

It's all just a pain, nothing more.

Love, friendship, everything.

You sigh and ring up Baji.

"I swear you're not getting over him if you keep on calling me." is the first thing he says over the phone. You'd slipped your whole heartache to him in your drunk state, and he chose to stay as a friend.

"I know." you say, though you know you're just trying to replace Kokonoi's hair with the black in Baji's and his grin with that of Baji's.

It doesn't fit at all. You don't like Baji at all, but you love Kokonoi, and you wish to distract yourself before the pain drives you crazy.

"Go get a life, (Name)-san." you hear him say, and are suddenly reminded he doesn't even know your surname- you only told him your first name, "Get a life, and when you need friends, you know the bunch you can come too."

This bunch includes Yuzuha, Emma, Tachibana, him and Emma's brother Mikey who somehow turned out to be Baji's childhood friend too.

They're friends to you, undeniably, but still, a decade of close frienship and love has a different charm to it.

A decade of friendship with Akane gets wasted because your envy and dread gets the best of you. A decade of friendship with Kokonoi is wasted because he suddenly stopped giving a fuck about you.

You don't want your friendship with Inui Seishu to be wasted- whether to not he could help you, he's always stood by you no matter what.

The call has ended and you put your phone down with a deep exhale.

He's right. I can't limit my life to just Kokonoi and his love.

You snort.

His "non-existent" love.

You can hear his voice amidst the knocking on the door. He doesn't sound too willing to call out to you.

"They're wasting their time." you know, because Kokonoi would always love only Akane.

There's no place in his heart for anyone else. Not even you.

And if they wish to come apologize for hardly caring about you, you don't need it. You don't wish for someone who needs to be reminded to care for you to be around you either.

But then again, the ache is there.

"Long long ago, there was a fire in Inui's house... " you're talking to yourself without realizing where you're headed, "Seishu got a scar on his face because of it, Akane was mistakenly diagnosed to require a lot of money to be treated."

You're in the kitchen, and you're turning the burner on.

"Another doctor checked the reports and found the flaw. Akane wasn't needing a big surgery at all. She was all safe and sound."

You turn the stove's burner on, the fire looks beautiful.

"I wonder what would've happened if she had died back then.. "

The doorbell's loud noise snaps you back into reality. It takes you a moment to breath in heavily and come back to your senses.

Once you realize what you'd been tying to do, you turn off the burner and hurry towards the drawing room, body trembling from cell to cell in panic and fear.

You'd lost it. You were about to do something utterly stupid.

It freaks you out.

You don't care who's knocking to door, you just open it. You need someone. Anyone.

You need a human interaction. Even just a single one- just to stabilize your mind and not let it override your body this way. You can't afford to let your life go just because a guy you liked didn't like you back or because he became oblivious to your friendship and what not.

Baji is right, you need to live.

It's Inui outside the door.

Kokonoi and Akane are standing a little further behind- Kokonoi is leaning against Inui's car and Akane stands a few steps away from him.

They look up from the ground on hearing the door open. Meanwhile, Seishu assesses the mess of a condition you're in and immediately steps ahead to help you balance.

Your whole body is still trembling, throat parched in fear. "Help me, Seishu. Help me."

Seishu's eyes are glassy- he doesn't know what to do. He never does, and he blames himself for how everything turns out.

If only I did things right...

But he doubts there's a right or wrong in a scenario like this. None of you all can be blamed for anything.

Inui Seishu hugs you and gently rub his back telling you to calm down. He hears you mumble as you grip onto him, about how you're scared because you feel your body isn't under your control anymore.

You'd always criticized people who leave the world in the name of love but you realize today maybe their bodies aren't in their control anymore. And maybe, they don't or can't put in the effort to gain the control back.

You can't let that happen.

Loving someone is okay, being heartbroken is okay. But letting go of all beauty of the world, all that accepts you for the one person who rejects you is stupid.

You may love him for all your life, may even say his name in the last few breaths of your living, but you would never leave everything and everyone for Kokonoi.

The others don't deserve that.

You don't deserve that.

Seishu helps you inside, Akane tries to help but he tells her to wait outside.

Kokonoi doesn't bother to even step forward.

This time, you don't expect him to either.

"But there's no point feeling guilty about it," Akane and Kokonoi are sitting in the office's cafeteria during lunch, "the whole reason she never told you herself is because she knew you'd feel this way."

Kokonoi just hums in response. He doesn't even know if it's only guilt he's feeling.

Akane stares at him, her lips twitching to word the one question revolving around her mind since the previous day.

"Hajime, " her voice is soft, "in this past decade of knowing her, have you ever even once had any feelings for her?"

Kokonoi's expressions are unchanged, "There's no space for anyone in my heart other than you, Akane-chan. Don't worry yourself with baseless thoughts." he picks up his tray and leaves to put it in the rack of dirty ones.

Akane stares behind him, her lips curled in a frown, "That's not what I'm asking."

Kokonoi watches Inui and you sitting at a table a little away, both busy in gossip. Your expression and pallor give away what you actually feel but you're trying to move on.

He notices you look towards the desert section and walk off towards it. Kokonoi takes the moment to go and sit with Inui Seishu.

"Koko." he greets.

"Inupi." Kokonoi greets back.

There's silence at the table. It is Inui who breaks it with a question- "Are you happy, Koko?"

Kokonoi has never encountered a question harder to answer before.

He's happy with Akane. She is all he has ever wanted since his childhood, but the fact that you sit alone crying because of him doesn't leave a very good taste in his mouth.

Kokonoi knows he chose Akane. He knows he will always stick by her side, yet still, for some reason, it doesn't feel right.

Him and Akane are perfect, but you being sad disturbs his ease.

Kokonoi has never once seen you cry before the previous day- you'd always been the one to smile through everything, the one who'd care for both the boys when they were hurt during the Black Dragon days, scold them, punish them, but always have that smile on your face.

He had started to cut all ties from you a couple of years ago- Kokonoi did not like his one-way hollow tunnel towards Akane being disrupted by a small, beautiful lane running elsewhere.

_________________ "In this past decade of knowing her, have you ever even once had any feelings for her?" _________________

If they'd been feelings, he wouldn't have thrown her aside so recklessly, right?

He doesn't even know why he mentioned Baji to you back then. It was all on instinct, but there was no need to- he has no business with the guys you spend your nights with.

Kokonoi looks up. Inui is still waiting for an answer, but he has none.

He can't even decide what his own actions or feelings mean.

"You should go then." Inui understands, "(Name)-chan wouldn't return back here if you stay."

But you do.

You place a bowl of ice cream in front of each of the two boys two more to the side, then beckon Akane seated a few tables away. Akane comes, though hesitant but you smile at her and try to talk.

You hold back all emotions and smile, just so that no one else has to bear any guilt because of you. Kokonoi sighs, you're trying to move on and fix things alone.

Like always...

This is just the way you are.

Nothing but an idiot.

But seeing you try makes his face droop. It latches an unexplained weight onto his heart.

________ "Are you happy, Koko?" ________

___________ "Help me, Seishu. Help me." ___________

He sighs.

He's not happy.

He doubt he ever will be.

32 notes · View notes

suitov · 2 months ago

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(A reckoning was not postponed. Not as sad, but warning for bitchy Nagito my beloved and Hajime coping very badly with stuff.)

Hajime had a headache, but it was one of those "slept too long" headaches, so could've been worse. Admittedly he'd been going at it hard lately; everyone seemed to think he'd gone to his cottage and crashed for a day and a half and the general consensus was "about time".

It was worrying because he didn't remember going home, which could've conceivably been down to plain old tiredness, but... waking up missing a chunk of time had another, far worse, possible explanation.

His headache wasn't going away. In fact, it had called in reinforcements in the form of Komaeda, who was hovering in a way that meant he wanted to say something. Hajime, the only one left at the breakfast table thanks to his late rising, stubbornly shovelled eggs onto his toast and the resulting tasty mess into his mouth. Maybe Komaeda'd go away.

Komaeda sat down opposite him.

"There's something we need to discuss, Hinata-kun." Started no conversation Hajime wanted to have, ever.

Hajime grunted and downed a slug of juice.

"It can't wait long, so is now a good time?"

He put down the glass. "Actually, I've got something I need to do after I eat."

"Ah." Komaeda leaned back. "That'd be what I want to talk about, actually. I take it you mean your daily hate monologue in the mirror?"

"How the hell--" He stared. "Have you been stalking me?"

"No, I haven't." Komaeda had his hands folded. No idea what that meant.

"But then how... oh gods, you haven't." The only way Komaeda could've been told his personal business was if... something had been out.

"If you're asking have I spoken to a certain person, then the answer is yes."

"Komaeda!" Hajime slammed the table. His plate, glass and cutlery flew everywhere; Komaeda winced. "That's dangerous! I don't let that thing out near the rest of you for a good reason! It could attack any moment!"

Komaeda drew breath and sighed obnoxiously.

"Did it chase you down? Did it hurt you?" He frantically scanned the sickly twig for injury. "What the hell did it say? Did it tell you to do things? Try to turn you against me?"

"Hinata-kun, stop." That firmness in his tone was unusual. Gods, now he'd be panicking over every little difference in their behaviours until he found out what that demon had been doing. A day and a half without supervision! He clutched his head. Really not helping the headache situation.

"I said stop," Komaeda ordered. Damn guy actually ordered. It was so weird, Hajime calmed down for a moment.

"Just... tell me if that creature hurt you, yeah?" he managed.

"He did nothing of the sort."

"But it spoke to you, right? After everything... it's not supposed to talk to people! I thought we'd reached some kind of understanding, I --"

"Hinata-kun, listen to me. What you're doing with Izuru, it's not working. It has to change."

He gawped. "Tell... tell me you're not on a first-name basis with the poison inside my brain!"

Komaeda was taking this far too calmly. Who paused to examine their fingernails at a time like this? "Hinata-kun, just listen to how you talk about him. Izuru is not a thing. He's not a creature and he's not poison. He's a living being and he's in pain."

"He's in pain?" Hajime really wanted to throw something, but that was his dark side and he wasn't going to let that thing win a single further step forward. "He... it is pain. It's sheer evil, Komaeda. You can't treat it like it's a person. Don't you know the things it did? The attacks, the deaths?"

"I hardly think any of us has grounds to talk about that," sniffed Komaeda.

"No, see, you guys were brainwashed into it. That woman found your weaknesses and used them to destroy you, mould you into whatever she wanted." He waved his hands about, trying to portray spooky brainwashing vibes. "That thing joined her happily. It was a willing participant! It knowingly--"

"But did he, though? Is that really true?" Interrupting-Komaeda was an unfamiliar and... kind of an unwelcome Komaeda. "Izuru was a child, Hinata-kun. A brand new, vulnerable life. The rest of us were forced into despair. Izuru never knew anything else. He was created by brutal experimentation, kept in a darkened cell and trained like a dog. Who could make an informed choice under those conditions?"

"He had the whole of human knowledge to call on," Hajime scoffed.

"And absolutely no life experience."

"Fine. Fine." He really didn't want to continue this conversation. His eggs felt like they were curdling with his orange juice. "You think he's a poor little baby and you want to excuse his war crimes..."

"I just find it strange that you're capable of excusing everyone else's war crimes," said Komaeda with infuriating reasonableness. "You know what Hanamura and Owari got up to. You know the damage Soda's contraptions did to the atmosphere. I'm pretty sure you heard what I did in Towa."

"Yeah but--" He flailed for a cutting rejoinder. "None of that stuff was me, Komaeda."

Komaeda tilted his head.

"That gross pile of evil impulses you call Izuru -- that's not even its name, you know, it's just a historical figure -- is me. It's the worst side of me. That's all it is! It's what I'm really like, underneath, if I was given ultimate power and no conscience to hold me back. There's no 'him' there, Komaeda. Whatever it said to you, whatever master scheme it tried to recruit you to -- Izuru Kamukura isn't a person. It's my Jekyll and nothing more."

"Hy-- never mind. Do you want to know the evil scheme he wanted to enact, Hinata-kun?" Nagito's eyes were sharp green ice. It reminded him of that one trial. "He begged me to kill him. He wanted to find a way to end himself without harming you, or, failing that, to lock himself away forever. That was after he cried in my arms for hours and told me how much he hates himself. Why, compared to how he speaks of himself, the way you talk about him is positively kind!"

Hajime sat back. That was... no, that shouldn't be true. Manipulation. It had to be. Twist Komaeda's head all around and send him to tell off Hajime so he'd... let his guard down, he supposed? Get angry and make a mistake? How dare that beast touch him? It sounded like they'd got positively cosy. He wasn't sure how he felt about his own body being held in Komaeda's arms. Despite trying to treat everyone kindly, he hadn't totally forgiven the guy for... well, all that stuff in there. Plus, he got weird feelings when he saw him smile.

"Anyway. As I said, things need to change." Damn Komaeda anyway, falling for... well, tears and begging did sound effective. That thing had all the same talents Hajime did. Acting, analysis. It was no wonder someone like Komaeda... what was he saying? "...propose is something like this. Izuru needs an advocate. If you're not able to talk to him directly, which I still think would be the best option, then I'll volunteer for the role. What's that look about? You don't think I can handle him?"

"No," said Hajime simply.

"Well then, we'll have to agree to disagree on that point, Hinata-kun, because nobody else on this island is capable or, I expect, willing."

"You can't just decide--"

Komaeda rolled his eyes. "Oh, forgive me for my presumption. When your current management strategy is working out so well." Well, damn. He was starting to miss the obsequious Komaeda from the sim, the one who would constantly praise and support him, instead of...

Wait, no! That was wrong! That was Evil Hajime again! He wasn't that person any more. He refused to be. Dammit, keeping that beast contained was what this was all about! He must never hurt anyone again, couldn't Komaeda understand--

"So." Komaeda nodded to himself and tapped his fingertips together as if everything was nice and decided. "I'll keep a look out and the next time I see him, hopefully when he's not so distressed, I'll talk to him. So you can leave me any questions you have, or constructive suggestions you want me to pass on. And perhaps there is some way to let the two of you talk. Who knows? It'd be quite the stroke of luck, huh?" Komaeda smiled and Hajime forgot all the excellent arguments he'd been about to make.

"I still think this is a terrible idea," he grumbled.

"All yours are worse," Komaeda said simply, and got up from the table. "Don't worry so much, Hinata-kun. You've built this up in your head into something horrific, but you should have more hope. My poor Izuru is nothing like what you're afraid of."

My?!? Izuru?!?!!

"I'll leave you to finish your breakfast in peace. You should clean that up before it stains." Komaeda, that infuriating bastard, tucked his chair neatly back into place and left, having ruined Hajime's day very effectively.

He collected up the scattered remains of his meal and went to make a big hot chocolate. He felt like needed it, after all that.

#hajime hinata #nagito komaeda #izuru kamukura #kamukoma #komahina #hajizuru hell

20 notes · View notes

lou-struck · 11 months ago

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Midnight In the Sky

Hajime Iwaizumi x reader

WC: 1.8k

~You missed the Countdown

You missed the party

But most importantly, you miss him

a/n: Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas to @sir-kuroo. I was think for a bit on what I wanted to do for this little gift and I thought A New Years Fic would be appropriate.

"You're kidding me."

"I know," you sign in exasperation as you watch the large board of flights flicker as the airlines struggle to make adjustments for the winter storm. "The attendant told me that my flight won't be taking off for another 4 hours." your voice is shaky as you hold your cell phone up to your ear, trying your best not to break down in the middle of this airport.

Hajime Iwaizumi's voice softens through the speaker. "What about New Years? The party?"

"Haji, you should still go. These are your friends, and I want you to have a good time tonight. Even if I can't be there with you." although you were trying your best to sound supportive. You really wanted to go to that New Year's party. It's always fun to spend the evening with your boyfriend and his friends. They're a wild bunch and make any time a great one.

"None of those people at the party are you." he pushes back. Fighting for the happiness that he knows you deserve. "What time do you land?" he asks, the cogs turning in his head on how he can make this shitty situation better. "It's early enough we could still make it to the party."

Although he can't see it, you shake your head at his words. Your lips formed into a deep frown. "It'll be way too late then. You go to the party, I'll be too tired too anyway. I'll just get a cab from the airport, and then we can see each other tomorrow."

"This is not how it was supposed to go. I'm sorry, y/n," he says. Although his voice is in your ear, it feels like he might as well be on another planet. "I wanted to spend midnight with you."

You don't know if it's the fact that you don't get to kiss your boyfriend at midnight on New Year's Eve or it's that you have been stuck in airports for the past 16 hours after your holiday plans ran late, but nevertheless, your eyes become watery.

"Don't go kissing anyone else at midnight," You laugh, knowing that he would never do such a thing. You trust him wholeheartedly. But let's face it: your boyfriend, Hajime Iawizumi, is a snack that most people wouldn't hesitate to try to sink their teeth into.

"I'd never," he says with a bit of lighthearted humor in his voice. The shift in his tone makes you feel a little bit better, but you haven't seen him in weeks, and you miss him so badly. Even hearing his voice seems like a mockery now, especially since you were supposed to see him face-to-face hours ago. "Do you want me to stay on the line with you while you wait?"

"no, that's all right. I'm going to go charge my phone; I love you so much. Have a great time tonight."

You hang up before he has a chance to say goodbye and wonder about the airport, anxiously waiting to get back home to him.

"ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We are beginning our descent into Tokyo International Airport. Our estimated arrival time at the gate will be, uh… 12:37 am. On behalf of the Flight Crew, we would like to thank you for choosing to fly with us this New Year's Eve.

The Pilot's announcement is loud enough to stir you from your light, uncomfortable slumber.

Blinking softly, you take in the darkened cabin; the soft snores of the other passengers reach your ears. You don't blame them. Traveling is exhausting, even if the plane is doing all the work. Winter weather has delayed your flight home from visiting your relatives for the holidays drastically. You've had three unexpected layovers, and the somber tingle in the back of your mind whispers to your subconscious that the odds of you getting your checked luggage back are stupidly low.

Another feeling that's hard to ignore is the cramped sensation in your neck from the way your head has been resting against the cabin walls.

But gut feelings and neck cramps pale in comparison to the ache in your chest. It's New Year's Eve, and you should've been home hours ago.

You should be at some glittery party wearing some Cheesy 2024 plastic glasses, drinking something sparkling, and cozied up with the person you love most.

You miss Hajime.

You miss his strong arms.

You miss the way he always seems to smell like Tiger Balm.

With a longing sigh, you lean closer to the small oval window next to you. The chill of the high altitude permeates the clear plastic buffer between your hand and the outer glass. Peering down through the thin cloud cover, you can see the lights of some city.

You should be down on the ground with him. But for reasons beyond your control, you are not.

All of a sudden, you see the first streak of light fly up towards you. It doesn't make it anywhere close to your plane before exploding into hundreds of little flares of light.

People down below are lighting off fireworks. How is it possible that it's midnight already?

You grab your phone. Although it's on airplane mode, the clock still works just fine. The four large numbers of your home screen clock stare back at you.

12:00 am

January 1st

You've missed the countdown.

Your stomach drops as the plane starts on it's gradual descent. It's crazy how when you're up in the sky, everything looks close together. The display of New Year lights is breathtaking, but your heart aches.

Can he see the fireworks too?

You can see it now: he's at the New Year's party with a big, handsome smile on his face, laughing with his friends. he must be so happy. And he must be having the best time. Listening to live music and drinking overpriced spirits at the venue.

there are a few strands of sparkly confetti in his spiked hair. He must look so handsome in the outfit you picked out for him.

Your matching one sits unused in your closet. Maybe you can use it next year…

You are pulled from your vivid imagination when the plane touches down on the asphalt roughly, the cabin shakes, And luggage compartments fly open, but thankfully, nothing flies out.

It skirts down the runway, leaving your stomach somewhere a few hundred meters back. Looking out the window at the dark and the sky, the fireworks have stopped, but at least you're home.

People are anxious to get off a plane, standing and rushing to the door with eagerness. They must have someone to meet, too.

From the entrance of the plane, you see one of the stages from earlier grab the intercom.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we have reached our destination. The current time is 12:33 am. We apologize for the delay, but all luggage from connecting flights will be arriving at 3 pm the next day due to travel. If you have any questions in regard to lost luggage or of damaged items, please contact our customer support hotline available on our website. Thank you for flying with us."

A few other passengers groan, but you were expecting this. You unplug your phone charger from your seat outlet and shove the white-coated wire into the front pocket of your backpack.

After one final sweep of the plane, you stand ready to get off of this thing, ready to be home, ready to see him later today.

It's funny how the people who had been so eager to get off the plane just seconds ago now decide to be unbearably slow as they walk through the gate and into the terminal. Your little carryon trails behind as you walk through the airport. Riding shuttles, climbing escalators, and dodging those little golf cart things that drive down the center of the walkway.

Exhaustion weighs on your travel-torn mind, And you walk as if you are in your own little world.

You don't even notice that someone is calling your name…

A gentle hand reaches out and grabs your sweatshirt-clad shoulder. You are brought out of La La Land and back to reality as your lidded eyes meet olive green, and for a moment, you are speechless.

"Hajime?" you breathe, too shocked to say the usual 'I missed you stuff' as you lunge forward and cling to him in a heartfelt embrace. "What are you doing here?"

He holds you tightly, pushing you into his broad chest. Oh, how you've missed those muscles.

The soft fabric of his hoodie cushions your face far better than any pillow you used these past few weeks away. "Do you really think I would want to spend the New Year with anyone else?"

"How long did you-?" you ask, your jaw dropping in surprise when you take the time to take in his attire. His dryer-faded Aoba Johsai sweatshirt and blue-gray checkered pajama pants were certainly not NYE party attire.

Where is the sharp-looking black dress shirt and champagne tie?

"I was already on my way to the airport when you called earlier." he chuckles stubbornly. His calloused fingers rub little circles into your back. "Did you really think I would just go and leave you here to fend for yourself?"

"But the party-"

"Wouldn't have been the same without you." he lovingly interrupts you and tilts his chin downwards to meet your eyes. "Once I told the others that your flight got delayed, they knew there was no chance I was going to be at that party."

"And???" you ask, knowing that there is always more to the story with him.

He smiles brilliantly, and you feel yourself falling in love all over again. "So instead, we are gonna go home, get some decent rest, and meet them for brunch tomorrow."

"Sounds perfect." Your heartbeat slows and although you are still standing in the arrivals gate of the airport- you feel like you're home at last.

"Hey," he looks down at you through his thick brows tenderly. "There's something I gotta say before anyone else does."

"What is it?" In confusion, you cock your head to the side?

"Happy New Year," he murmurs, the love he has for you coating his words like powdered sugar on the roof of your mouth.

"Happy New Year Hajime."

His fingers tiptoe around your waist and pull you close. "It may not be midnight, but I still want that New Year's Kiss?"

It may be 12:53 am on January 1st, but who are you to care when his Carmex-dusted lips meet yours.

This is your midnight moment on the ground.

Gone is the Baggage claim and grouchy travelers as fireworks ignite all around you as you fall under his spell. Greedy for more of these moments that are sure to come with this New Year

Tagging: @enchantedforest-network

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hajime x reader #haikyuu iwaizumi #iwaizumi hajime #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #Hajime iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi x reader #x reader

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theamityelf · 2 months ago

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I've had this au in my mind for a couple of months so I figured I'd share it with someone.

so basically Hajime and Shuichi are half-brothers (maternal side) they grew up together but Hajime saw his dad a lot more often than Shuichi got to.

In this au Shuichi grows up to be the Pre-game Shuichi that's showed in the 6th trial all obsessed over a written version of Danganronpa (written by junko Enoshima herself) and Hajime (attending hopes peak) being concerned over his younger brother obsessing over real people he knows but he doesn't say anything about it.

BOOM tragedy happens, killing games happen BOOM BOOM !!!

In this au V3 actually happened irl, Pre-Game Shuichi turns into the Shuichi we know afterwards and when they escape the dome bubble Makoto and his gang (accompanied by Hajime) find Shuichi, Maki and Himiko and they're like "are you guys ok!?"

Hajime is especially concerned about Shuichi, basically tackling him in a bear hug, nearly crying and Shuichi is all confused being like "who are you?" And Hajime is like "I'm your brother-you don't remember"

And basically after all that Hajime has to handle his younger brother not remembering him and trying to jog his memory about his past life, with Shuichi feeling bad he can't remember that life with his supposed older brother.

Its a really messy au that i haven't really done anything for but it's fun to think about! Thank you for reading my ramblings ^_^

my friend made this image when I told her about it lol >_<

That's definitely a great one!

Thinking about Pregame Shuichi, who wishes/imagines he were an Ultimate Detective, when his brother goes missing. (Presuming the Kamukura Project still happens to him.)

And then, the next time they see each other, neither of them is quite himself.

But they're still brothers. 😭

#danganronpa #hajime hinata #shuichi saihara

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a-student-out-of-time · 4 months ago

Note

Honestly you just answered your own question. Letting Hajime and Hibiki know that even if you don’t agree with their choices, you still love and support them, that you want them to be happy, that will make all the difference in the world

*In the closet*

So, what did you wanna talk about?

...

Listen...Gunny, if you're mad at me or feel like I've neglected you-

You haven't. That's not what this is about, nor is it about any suspicions. I have other matters I want to address.

...Is this about my sister?

Yes. But it's not about your decision with her, it's about your inability to let go.

My anger is not at you. It's how, even now, you refuse to release yourself from her. The one who caused you so much grief and heartbreak, who plunged you into a living nightmare and it took everything in our power to wake you up.

You bear no responsibility for her actions. You had nothing to apologize. Had you chosen to strike her down, I would not have judged you. Nor would I have judged Hajime.

I know, okay? I know, I made a mistake, and now-

You...still do not understand...

...Hibiki, my dearest siren, shall I tell you a tale? It's the tale of my lineage.

What do you mean?

...I am the offspring of an angel, I told you that much. But my mother was seduced by a devil, and I am the product of their union. A union neither side's family approved of, and I was rejected by both sides.

And in the end, even the devil abandoned us. He brought me into this world, resented my very existence, and left my mother and I behind to pursue his own desires. His fortunes were denied to us as well.

Wow, what an asshole!

Indeed. But never once did I resent my mother for falling for his seductions; even when all others abandoned us, she stood by me and sought to raise me. She may not have been perfect...but she was still an angel.

And so, while I may bear the curse of evil, even as I was rejected by humans, I will never allow myself to become like that devil.

And then...I met Sonia, Hajime...and you. I met those who stood by me, even through the darkest times. You don't try to change me, you try to understand me...

How could I ever resent you? And how could I stand by and allow yourself to remain tainted?

Tainted...?

The tainted of the demon that harmed you. Who continues to harm you, and from whom you refuse to unshackle yourself. Now is the time to move on, to absolve yourself and understand that your mistakes- whatever they may be- are not the cause of all this.

And by all the power vested into me, allow me to say this! Otonokoji Hibiki...

*He places both hands on her shoulders*

I forgive you. Of everything you fear and everything you feel guilt for. You are forgiven.

Now...I hope you'll learn to forgive yourself as well.

Gundham...

#danganronpa #sdra2 #super danganronpa another 2 #sdr2 #super danganronpa 2 #hibiki otonokoji #gundham tanaka #a student out of time #DR #Dianthus Memory arc

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chishigure · 5 months ago

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#19! (diary meme)

DEAR DIARY

19. entry made featuring pain.

@kowaindar0u

It's been so many decades since the Boshin war and the water of life came to an end. After so many losses and victories from those endless battles, I've become married man with two wonderful sons, and I also became a police officer with Hajime-kun. It's a shame that Kondou-san couldn't be there for my wedding, physically. His life... He didn't deserve to die. If anybody were to die, it should have been me. After all, I was practically already a walking corpse when I had fallen ill from that famous disease that was going around and I had been cursed with it. Eversince my boys have grown, the disease that nearly turned me into a walking corpse me has come back to curse me again. I thought I was cured from it because I haven't shown or had any symptoms of it. I haven't felt sick in so long and neither have I been coughing up blood, feeling weak and all that. But now I'm weak again. I'm getting sick and coughing up blood again. I've become more fatigued than usual. Chizuru-chan would ask me how I've been when I come back from my duties, and I've only told her that my duties as a police officer have been tiring and all I want is to be with her and our children. That's not wrong, but the real answer is that I'm only growing weaker each day because I've become ill with tuberculosis again. That's why I've been awfully fatigued lately. How long ago did I get my diagnosis? How long have I been sick for and went on without treatment? I hate to say it, but about a month ago I visited Doctor Matsumoto without telling anybody what was going on with me. I told him how I've been feeling and what symptoms I've been having, and according to him I've got tuberculosis again. I'm not sure how and he's not even sure how either. Maybe I'm just cursed. I can't show how weak I've become. Not to my family. No one. I have to stay strong for them all. If I die so soon, that would hurt my family gravely. There has to be a cure for this disease. If I had been cured before then I can be cured again, right? I can't live on like this anymore. Chizuru-chan, Yasusada-chan, and Kashuu-chan need me. No one needs me more than they do. I have to stay strong. I can't let them see me getting weaker and weaker.

Though he had much more to write, this is where Souji's entry ends. Whatever else he was trying to write had become illegible and now covered in a bit of the blood he coughed up.

From afar he could hear Yasusada's cheerful voice. Souji tried so hard to keep his own act up that nothing was wrong with him. However his vision was slowly becoming blurred. Despite his vision becoming blurred, Souji quickly but also struggled to close his diary and hide it under his futon.

As soon as he had gotten lucky enough to even be able to hide his diary, his vision had darkened and he fell at the top of his futon.

#kowaindar0u #messages #//pain you say? pain you get! :eyes everywhere:#death mention cw #illness mention cw #sickness mention cw #idk if these tags are necessary but tags anyway just in case LOL

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sukisukisu · 2 years ago

Text

Stuck in the jet wash

Bad trip I couldn't get off

And maybe I bit off more than I could chew

And overhead of the aqua blue

(The kids aren't alright- Fall Out Boys)

---

If I want to touch him, Iwaizumi thought, so be it, just touch him.

"You still haven't gotten over the habit of buying a bunch of ready-to-eat food for the whole week, have you? Cooking one proper meal will kill you or something ?" he asked, his voice monotonous through the speaker, a very Iwaizumi Hajime kind of tone. He always tried to be polite to everyone, but at the same time, Iwaizumi knew he didn't want to.

(It's a relief to think about the fact that, Oikawa was the only one who knew all this about him)

"Yes, sorry for always being a clumsy person, sorry for always being wrong, Mr.Iwaizumi" Oikawa sighed. Iwaizumi was in his dorm in Irvine, and it was dark now, the sounds of the city rushing in to fill up the empty room. Oikawa, on the other end of the line, was far away in Buenos Aires. Suddenly Iwaizumi realized how much he missed hearing this teasing tone so close to his ear.

"But you know, Iwa-chan. Time is treasure, and money. I want to focus all my time on volleyball. If not, why could I still standing here?" Oikawa exhaled. Iwaizumi didn't say anything approving, but he let out a small, complacent hum.

"Well, I guess you're not wrong" Iwaizumi sighed, more helpless than in surrender. He wondered where Oikawa was. He didn't hear any other sounds around him, maybe Oikawa was at home. "But I mean, you need to balance your life too, Oikawa. I don't want to go to your funeral yet"

"It's okay, it's okay. Everything's fine, Iwa-chan" Oikawa boasted "Recently, I've improved my reaction speed to the ball from one second two to one second. Sooner or later I'll get to play oversea"

"You talk like a clock or something . It's awful" Iwaizumi said bluntly, and Oikawa let out a disgruntled cry. Iwaizumi could never understand it, but Oikawa once said that he liked the calculation, because he wanted everything to be perfect, and loved the feeling of the ball reaching the palm of his teammate in the right amount of time. He liked it, when everything was in order, his lips parted, counting the passing moments. One, two. A pass is two seconds. The jumping block is three seconds. Fast pass is one second five. "I remember when I was in high school I was influenced by you too. I kept counting one, two before I jumped. Not so much now, though"

"You can use that habit for many things Iwa-chan, in normal life, for example" Oikawa hummed. "Like the three-second, and five-second rule. Do you measure anything else like that?"

(If I want to touch him, Iwaizumi thought, so be it, just reach out)

(It's only three seconds)

"No, nothing," he lied. Oikawa fell silent, an invisible nod that both of them understood. Oikawa then tried to convince him of his habit of shopping for ready-to-eat food, the health benefits of a box of dried sardines, and told him to buy presents for their parents, the next time they would return to Miyagi.

(Not just three seconds anymore, Iwaizumi thought. It's thirteen hours now, do you have to be so far away from me?)

---

Fall to your knees bring on the rapture

Blessed be the boys time can't capture

On film or between the sheets

I always fall from your window

To the pitch black streets

---

They were sitting together in class, their desks by the windows, and when the glass is pulled aside they'll be able to have their own cherry blossom branch. The branch seemed to have grown in a different trajectory than the others, hanging down from the window of their third-floor classroom instead of floating in the pale blue sky like others. This was Oikawa's favorite lunch spot, Iwaizumi remembered. Though to him it was nothing more than a nuisance, as cherry blossoms always covered his lunch box.

"Not again!" Iwaizumi let out a disgruntled groan, clutching his head as a peach petal fell straight into his bowl of soup. It was springtime, and his mother had prepared a squash soup for him, which she said was perfect for this weather. Anyway, he couldn't eat it anymore now. "I'm so sick of this place"

"Sometimes we should just enjoy those small moments in life, Iwa-chan" said Oikawa intelligently—something Iwaizumi detested. "You'll miss this all later, when we're not here anymore"

Oikawa's statement made them both fall silent for a second, even though Iwaizumi knew it was just a frivolous but factual remark. They both knew what was coming, though both avoided it like a giant elephant in the room. They were in their final year, the college entrance exam is approaching, and then they would have to find their own way. Though it sounded shallow, Iwaizumi hated thinking about those things, about what school he's going to, where he's moving to, the things he often called "adult worries". He wanted his life to be just like it was then- only him and Oikawa, the volleyball team, school, dinner, and the desire to become stronger. Thinking that all of this would eventually end made him feel both frustrated and heartbroken, like a child who lost his favorite toy he was holding in his hand.

"Have you thought about where to go?" It was Oikawa who asked, ending the silence that hung between them. He knew Iwaizumi didn't want to stay in Japan- he said that Tokyo was too complicated to live in, and he didn't really want to continue his career as a volleyball player. As usual, Oikawa always knew what Iwaizumi was thinking. He wasn't sure why either.

"For the time being, I'm considering between California and Brazil, or Korea. They have a very good university program, and the scholarship amounts are also very high" Iwaizumi said. Oikawa replied with the sound of bread crumbling in his mouth. What is he, six years old? "But anyway, I want to choose the closest place to Japan. I also have to calculate how long it is from the airport to where I will live and which country is the easiest to issue a Visa"

"I mean, you can just go where you want. There's no need to think so much. If you want to go---- then just go" Oikawa explained calmly. A hand tapped on his chin, and Iwaizumi's eyes widened, as if surprised, before that expression slipped from his face. Looking calm, Iwaizumi shrugged.

"And what can guarantee that, there will be no risks if I just go where I want to go, without any consideration?"

Oikawa smiled. Iwaizumi narrowed his eyes, he didn't understand, couldn't understand. The midday sun shone on Oikawa's face, a glimmer of light, winding through the air.

"Because no matter where Iwa-chan is, I'll be there to find you whenever you need me"

---

Surviving in California wasn't easy for Iwaizumi, even though he never wanted to admit it. After being encouraged by Oikawa that year, Iwaizumi decided to go to Irvine, and signed up for a small volleyball team while waiting for the results of his college entrance exams. At that time, everything was still easy. He lived in a small apartment, the window overlooking the street, watching the flow of people. His apartment was a five-minute bus ride and a ten-minute walk from the gym. Everyone was friendly to him, every Friday they would go to party at the restaurant just down the street. California was so similar but also so different from Japan, especially when you place Irvine next to the Miyagi. The night in Irvine was always alive, in a sense that wasn't very pleasant to him. How can one sleep in a city like this?

"You can never actually separate the night and day here" another Japanese guy on the team told Iwaizumi. Apparently his name is Takehito. "It's not easy to live here, Iwaizumi" Takehito said while packing things from his closet into his personal bag. He applied for leave to return home. "I'll just go back to Japan. My parents said it's okay, and everything will be fine. I'll give it a try there" then he gave Iwaizumi a rare smile "But one day, I hope I will see you on TV"

Iwaizumi found himself different from that moment, from the day Takehito returned home, until he received an invitation from Birtwistle University, for a scholarship to the athletic training department. But studying was no way easy, and Iwaizumi had to move from his tiny apartment with beautiful windows into the school dormitory in the city center. His classmates were not very friendly. They were taller, and harder to approach. They didn't try to talk to him. It took him twenty minutes to walk from the dormitory to the nearest restaurant. Weekends were no longer a concept to Iwaizumi, as he spent almost all of his time at the library, and the chatty calls between him and Oikawa dwindle before disappearing altogether. Currently, they only call when there was a need.

Suddenly, Iwaizumi realized how great the distance between them had became. He could no longer reach out and touch him, one, two, three, and his hand reached Oikawa, and Oikawa turned to smile at him, like a strip of spring sunshine. No, that had gone too far, and Oikawa was on the other side of the continent. There was no way Iwaizumi could reach out to touch him anymore. Not just three seconds. No more feeling the warmth of his flesh, like one reaching out to touch the sun. Just a palm filled with air.

"Iwaizumi-san" someone called out, causing him to flinch. Iwaizumi looked up, it was Ushijima. He looked even taller than when he was in high school, even though he was already something different from them then. He almost forgot they were at the park chatting after meeting Ushijima's father, not having time to regain his composure until the other handed him a can of Pocari sweat.

"You got heatstroke? Your face looks a bit tense" said Ushijima, very casually. Iwaizumi never thought he was that kind of caring person. "If you want, we can go home"

"I'm fine, thank you" Iwaizumi nodded politely and popped the lid of the can. Its sticky taste was so familiar, it made him smile a little. "In high school we used to drink this like it was water, so nostalgic"

"You're not wrong" replied Ushijima. It seemed that what Iwaizumi said also made him think a bit. "Miyagi sure is amazing"

Iwaizumi was silent, because the other was right. There was something about Miyagi that always held him back, even though he was an ocean, and twenty-two hours away. Relaxed days, without thinking about the worries of adults, a volleyball on his shoulder. Peach blossoms outside the window of their classroom in Aoba Johsai. His training shoes were lying next to Oikawa's, and they were sprawled on the floor, drenched in sweat. Oikawa reached out his hand to touch the sunlight as if it were something, and his face was disappointed as if he wanted to hold it tightly in his hand. Iwaizumi didn't know why he remembered that scene now. Oikawa's hand clenched, sunspots dancing across his face.

Iwaizumi realized he could never forget that face.

"Do you want to go back to Miyagi, Iwaizumi-san?"

---

I'm not passive but aggressive

Take note, it's not impressive

Empty your sadness

Like you're dumping your purse on my bedroom floor

We put your curse in reverse

---

They were sitting side by side in the shade of Kitagawa Daiichi High School's gym, and Iwaizumi remembered that at the time, Oikawa was crying. His face was flushed red, buried in the collar of his blue-white jacket with their middle school logo on it, his eyes puffy, tears streaking down his cheeks. Iwaizumi sighed, pulling out a handkerchief. He was already too used to this.

"Listen, everything's fine. We'll do better next year" Iwaizumi said, trying to sound as sympathetic as possible, thrusting the towel into Oikawa's hand. With the stubborn expression still on, Oikawa blew his nose. "Shiratorizawa is strong, but they're just a team like us. Just practice and we can beat them. So stop crying, okay?"

"I can't accept it...." Oikawa sobbed, his face buried in the handkerchief "Unacceptable....we practice until it's dark....every day.... only to lose..." He pouted "It's not fair"

"I know, I know" Iwaizumi rolled his eyes. He, honestly, didn't feel as miserable as Oikawa was feeling right now. I mean, last year they lost to Shiratorizawa too. The year before... and the year before that, as well. It was humiliating to think about, however, Iwaizumi didn't think he had the need to show it out like Oikawa, so he kept quiet. But Oikawa seemed to have something else in mind, so Iwaizumi saw him look up, his eyes shining like stars.

"Listen, Iwa-chan. Do you know what the summer solstice is?" Oikawa said. Seeing him shake his head, Oikawa let out a sigh.

"The summer solstice is the beginning of summer in the northern hemisphere. Which means it's the only day of the year where the day is longer than the night. It's the longest day of the summer" he explained, scrutinizing Iwaizumi's face. Eyes shining, it was hard to believe that Oikawa was in the ninth grade, the province's best second passer, and the captain of the Kitagawa Daiichi volleyball team. He looked just like a kid.

"That means, on this day we have more time to play volleyball, the longest day we can practice together in a year. So from now on, we will play volleyball a lot on that day, and then we'll get better. And then, we'll defeat Shiratorizawa, okay?"

(At that time, his way of thinking was only enough to deceive children. However, Iwaizumi still wanted to listen to him. He still wanted to believe)

"That's a good idea, Oikawa" Iwaizumi exhaled, grinning. Oikawa nodded.

"Then promise me, that we'll spend the summer solstice every year together. And we'll get stronger. We'll be the strongest pair in Japan!"

Oikawa held out his hand, and Iwaizumi waved it at him, a habit of theirs.

"I promise"

---

And it's our time now if you want it to be

Maul the world like a carnival bear set free

And your love is anemic and I can't believe

That you couldn't see it coming from me

---

"I can't make it this year" one day when Oikawa called him, Iwaizumi lied.

He didn't have to turn on the video mode to picture Oikawa's face right now. He must have been frozen in front of the phone, arms crossed over his chest, eyebrows furrowed stubbornly—the kind of Oikawa Tooru expression he used to make when he didn't get what he wanted. Then Iwaizumi would have to coax him with some reason that would be able convince Oikawa, hopefully, so that he would just let it go and forget about it. He was so used to this scenario.

"I have a particularly important test. You know, I'm in my fourth year, my final year. I can't miss any chance to graduate" he lied again, the words overlapping, he knew it was all a pathetic counter-measure. "That's why I'm not going back to Miyagi. But Ushiwaka will go, I guess"

"I don't care about Ushiwaka at all, are you crazy out of your mind??!" Oikawa hissed from the other end of the line in displeasure. His voice was shrill, filled with anger, and Iwaizumi understood why. "We already didn't come back last year, Iwa-chan. And the year before as well"

"What's the point of coming back there?" Iwaizumi sighed "We've been gone for four years anyway"

"Well, we should go back to watch this year's Seijou match against Shiratorizawa. Go back and have a beer with Mattsun and Makki. Go back, and have a surprise party to congratulate Yahaba on his promotion. Let's go home, back to our old practice room in Aoba Johsai, Iwa-chan" Oikawa explained. Iwaizumi admitted that all of the reasons Oikawa listed were valid, but he couldn't let himself give in.

"I'm so sorry, but I can't miss the exam this time He sighed. Somehow, Iwaizumi had a feeling that Oikawa didn't believe him. He always knew when he was lying, but despite that, Iwaizumi was still here. He really didn't want to see Oikawa. At least, not right now.

"I see" Oikawa hummed, then sank into a thoughtful, silent silence "It's just...."

"It's just that I feel like you're so far away from me, Iwa-chan"

Consciousness slammed into Iwaizumi like a bullet train, and he felt his hand freeze for a moment. No matter how much they both avoided it, despite the fact that they already knew it was true, Iwaizumi- like Oikawa- never wanted to admit, that their relationship wasn't what it used to be. They were different. They were adults, with adult worries, and Iwaizumi had forgotten how close Oikawa felt to him, as well as the love he had never expressed. He didn't want to say it, nor did he intend to say it. He just wanted to keep Oikawa there, close enough for Iwaizumi to see him, but far enough for Iwaizumi not to touch, to not need to touch him.

It was him who pushed Oikawa away, but as a natural reaction, he wished Oikawa would come closer to him, once again placing his hand on his forehead, laughing into his throat. As a natural reaction, he avoided Oikawa, but he was the one who craved him, more than anyone.

How ironic.

"Stop saying things like that"

"What?"

Iwaizumi was silent. His lips pursed.

"I don't want to hear you talk about such things anymore" Iwaizumi repeated. "Our relationship--- it's fine. We're grown-ups, Oikawa. We're not two eighteen years old anymore. We don't have to stick together all the time. So-- you don't have to, think about me so much. Just let--- let things be. I'm just one of them people in your life"

Deep down inside, Iwaizumi knew Oikawa wasn't wrong. He knew it all- about the short, awkward conversations, about the calls that dwindled and stopped altogether. Suddenly, Iwaizumi wondered how his old self would feel. If he went back in time, and told eighteen-year-old Iwaizumi that he didn't want to be Oikawa's best friend anymore, he would probably punch him in the mouth and call him an idiot. That's what Iwaizumi was, he was an idiot. He knew his eighteenth self would reach out to touch Oikawa and hold him tightly in his arms with all his might, but now, he wouldn't allow himself to do that anymore, wouldn't give himself the right to that anymore.

Oikawa didn't say anything. He hung up, and Iwaizumi couldn't reach him until a week later.

---

And sometimes I just wanna sit around and

Gaze at my shoes

And let your dirty sadness fill me up

Just like a balloon

---

They were sitting next to each other on Aoba Johsai's gym floor, it was the summer solstice of their senior year in high school. The two had been practicing all day, just like the promise they had made to each other, so Iwaizumi thought his poor back was falling to pieces as he collapsed onto the wooden floor. Oikawa was sitting up straight, thinking about something. He was always thinking about something, it was weird. Iwaizumi reached out, his fingertips touching Oikawa's shirt, the white and blue plaid uniform shirt worn over the years. At that time, Oikawa was still very close.

"What's wrong, Iwa-chan?" Oikawa asked with wide eyes. Outside the door, dusk was slowly falling, signaling the end of the longest day of summer, and also the beginning of summer.

Iwaizumi felt his mind relax at that thought.

"Nothing" he grinned, exhaling. He didn't even know why he was so happy. "Suddenly I feel happy because summer is coming"

"You've always liked summer, haven't you, like a child" Oikawa made an innocuous remark. Iwaizumi glanced at him, and Oikawa seemed to falter. "Okay, me too, fine, I'm sorry" the brunette exhaled, surrendering.

"But this summer is the last summer I'll be able to practice with Iwa-chan. It's sad to think about, to be honest"

Ever since they were two kids, Iwaizumi and Oikawa have always loved summer. Iwaizumi was born in June, a month before Oikawa, so his mother made a joke that they were the children of summer. Iwaizumi remembered that they were both very proud of that, a childish pride. But for him and Oikawa, summer is the season of freedom, no school, no homework, the sun is always overhead and a big field with a ball for them to play freely. Summer is the season to rest and do what they want, the blue on the back of Oikawa's shirt when he jumps for a serve, the sticky taste of Pocari sweat dripping down their throat, Oikawa's hand holding his, sweaty, but never letting go. It is often said that high school is the spring of life, although Iwaizumi still stubbornly believed that it should be summer.

"That's not wrong" Iwaizumi exhaled. "We trained really hard today, anyway. Even though I don't think we'll ever face Ushiwaka again" he pretended to stick his tongue out, shaking his head. At the thought of that name, Iwaizumi was bored to the core. They had haunted each other for years now, it was finally time to let go.

"Actually... that's why we don't need to practice today. But for some reason I still wanted to call you over"

"You're too cheesy" Iwaizumi laughed. The setting sun poured into the gym, licking his shins.

Oikawa did not answer. Iwaizumi jerked his head up when he didn't hear him reply, with a laugh, or perhaps an exclamation, as his talkative nature often did. But nothing came. Oikawa said nothing, and when Iwaizumi tilted his head to look at him, he saw that Oikawa's face was red.

(Don't say anything, he thought. Please don't)

"Perhaps because...." Oikawa hesitated. But then he squeezed his hand, his eyes wavering.

(With each summer, you'll get further and further away from me, thought Iwaizumi. So don't say anything. You know that's better for both of us)

"Perhaps because today is the longest day of the year, that I can be with Iwa-chan" continued Oikawa. His eyes filled with tears, like that day when he cried after the loss, and Iwaizumi comforted him, the day they made that promise. A promise for the summer solstice, a handshake at dusk, a handkerchief, a smile. Iwaizumi remembered those things as clearly as if it were yesterday.

"One day in a year may sound like a big deal, but compared to our whole life, it's merely a second" Oikawa laughed. "So if it's just for a second, can you stay with me?"

---

On the summer solstice of 2023, Iwaizumi did not go to class.

The previous call between him and Oikawa kept Iwaizumi miserable for a week, as he deserved. He tried calling him many times but couldn't, all his messages went straight to voicemail. No calls from Matsukawa and Hanamaki- maybe Oikawa didn't tell them. He spent his days buried in blankets and survived on fast food and water. The hum of the air conditioner was the only sound he could hear these days. Looked like his utility bill will increase. Iwaizumi couldn't care less. He deserved it.

The clock showed nine o'clock in the morning. Iwaizumi turned on his phone, realizing that today was the summer solstice, he had almost forgotten about it. June twenty-two, the text on his screen appeared. He sighed heavily, and was actually about to go back to his sleep, until someone knocked on his door.

"The utility bill isn't due today" Iwaizumi called out, his voice slurred, tired. Damn, he hated this dorm.

There was silence on the other side of the door. And then, Iwaizumi's eyes widened.

"If you don't open this door, Iwa-chan" the voice said, "I swear, quite seriously, that I'll kill you"

And in the end

I'd do it all again

I think you're my best friend

Don't you know that the kids aren't al, kids aren't alright?

It was like a shock, and suddenly, all the sounds in the world seemed to have returned to him, crashing into Iwaizumi's room like a giant storm. The sound of the city, the music outside the window, his TV crackling, his heart pounding. Iwa-chan. Its tone was painfully familiar, nostalgia exploding and rattling in his chest like a chemical reaction. Iwaizumi mumbled, getting out of the blankets and crawling up, heading for the door. His hand was cold when he placed it on the doorknob, and for a minute he wondered what it would be like if he hadn't opened it. But he knew this time, he had to do the right thing after all the mistakes, so---

(Three seconds, only three seconds)

Oikawa's arms wrapping around him, and the scent of shampoo in his hair smelled like cherry blossoms, his body warm, his shoulders lightly shook as they collided. Oikawa was like a hurricane hitting right in his little room, and it really scared the hell out of Iwaizumi with what all this could do, but at the same time he thought he'd never been so happy. Turned out that's all it took. It only took three seconds to reach him, three seconds for his mouth to open and call "Oikawa!", three seconds to dial the phone, thirteen hours to get to Buenos Aires. That's all, but he didn't do it, never had the courage to do it. Perhaps he was never as brave as he thought.

(If I want to touch him, then I would just reach out my hand like I'm touching the sun, reach out for three seconds)

"Iwa-chan" Oikawa, just like his memories of that year, bursted into tears on his shoulder. His hair was shorter, and he was taller too, sturdier, tanned and certainly more handsome than the last time they'd seen each other three years ago. But in his eyes Oikawa would always be just Oikawa, he was Kitagawa Daiichi's Oikawa with the blue uniform, Aoba Johsai's Oikawa with the jade teal flag on his back and the crown on his head, the Oikawa who had always reached out to him.

I'll be yours

When it rains it pours

Stay thirsty like before

Don't you know that the kids aren't al, kids aren't alright?

"Iwa-chan, I've been thinking a lot about what you said. About us becoming adults, about how we don't need to stick together all the time. I asked my mom about it and she said you'r enot wrong" Oikawa said. Iwaizumi brushed the wet hair from his cheeks. "But, I still don't want to accept it. I thought about it, and I realized that one day a year isn't enough. So, can't you stay with me for the rest of our life?" He sobbed "You said that you're just another person in my life, but I don't think so, I don't allow, will never allow you to say that. Iwa-chan to me, is the most important person, the bearer of the warmth that is warmer than anyone, the one who holds me tighter than anyone, so you can't say that, you can't ever say that, understood?"

With just those questions, Iwaizumi allowed himself to pull Oikawa closer. This time, he allowed himself to hold him in his arms, the gap he had tried to fill but never dared to. This time, he allowed himself to smile. Suddenly he remembered that last summer solstice of high school when he and Oikawa were sitting next to each other in the gym, and neither of them wanted to go home. They ended up sleeping there too, only to be scolded by their parents the next day. So childish.

"I promise," he said, his voice echoing from the past. "But, I also want you to know that I love you. And that's why I've been avoiding this since forever. So if anything happens, it's your fault" Iwaizumi said nonchalantly, though his face was red, deliberately ignoring the fact that he had just confessed his love so blatantly.

"Fine, Iwa-chan" Oikawa laughed. And then Iwaizumi suddenly felt so relieved, to be able to hold the summer of his life.

---

(Iwaizumi realized that "I love you" only takes three seconds to say.)

#hq!!#haikyuu!!#haikyuu #iwaizumi hajime #iwaoi #iwaoi fanfic #iwaoi fanart

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tobiasdrake · 1 year ago

Text

Like. In the spirit of Nagito being on the ball, he brings up the victim's death in a really creative way in order to close out an obvious assumption.

"Ibuki committed suicide" is a tangent that Nagito goes down in his typical Nagito fashion. The others point out that he's being stupid because. Like.

Akane: Are you seriously suggesting that Ibuki killed herself, then killed Hiyoko, and then messed with the crime scene!? Nagito: Oh, not at all! I'm suggesting that Ibuki killed Hiyoko, then killed herself, and then messed with the crime scene!

Like. The point he's making goes over their heads. He's being wrong on purpose again. Nobody quite manages to catch up to what he's trying to bring them to with this one.

But I gotcha, Nagito. The problem he's honing in on is the interaction between the Blackened rules and the means of murder. He clarifies this right at the start with Monokuma, when he asks if Ibuki killing herself would make her the Blackened.

It's the same issue as Peko's "My master Fuyuhiko is the true Blackened" nonsense. Except instead of the killer being fucking stupid and failing to clarify the rules with Monokuma, the killer did everything right, and the rest of the group is struggling to catch up. (Except Nagito, who's clearly picked up on it.)

The person who delivers the killing blow is the Blackened. Always. No exceptions.

We're made to believe that Ibuki, through her Despair Disease making her compliant, was simply instructed to climb a stepladder and hang herself. But that can't be true. That is the one way she cannot have died. Because then she would be the Blackened, and not the aspiring hopeful looking to escape this island.

They haven't been very well established in 2 yet which is why Nagito has to clarify with Monokuma. But that's how the accomplice rules work. Even if someone told her to do it, if Ibuki killed Ibuki then Ibuki is the Blackened. Period.

And since Ibuki isn't the Blackened, then something else must necessarily be going on here.

That is the point Nagito was trying to make with his whole "Ahh, Ibuki committed suicide!" tangent. He was trying to provoke a realization of, "Oh shit, Ibuki can't have hung herself at all! The video Hajime saw was fake!" He manages to get them there later by playing dumb about the blood on her soles, but this first attempt sails right over their heads.

It's okay, buddy. I see where you were trying to go with this.

#danganronpa #danganronpa 2 goodbye despair #nagito komaeda #komaeda nagito #revisiting dr2

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lu3ky777 · 9 months ago

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I gotta another NTR asks but with Either a Futa Hiyoko or genderbent Hiyoko. Either way she's tired of hajime stealing all of Mahiru's time away from her, who cares if they're dating she was Hiyoko's first looks like she just needs to assert dominance in front of hajime by stealing Mahiru away from him

(Warning, NTR obviously so be advised.)

Genderbent Hiyoko wasn't going to just take this massive insult to the face lying down. Mahiru had clear duties to Hiyoko, help him dress every morning and shower him with praises for his dances (Among other things). But Hajime? She left her duties for God damn Hajime??? He was 50X the man Hajime was and in Hiyokos mind they both needed to be punished. So Hiyoko invited Mahiru to his room and she had better not refuse…

She did come fortunately~ Hiyoko was waiting for her naked, which caught Mahiru off guard… Especially as she stared at his enormous cock, making her drool~ No- she shouldn't think about that, about how Hiyoko could force her onto her knees and shove that cock down her throat~ Wait- why isn't he dressing himself? I-is this not a mistake-

Hiyoko had reached Mahiru, closing the door behind her. Hiyoko spoke clearly as he grabbed her ass and groped it with one hand “Onto your knees~” Mahiru had to~ She had to get onto her knees and suck on his balls~ obediently sucking and kissing them as she was obsessed by the pure MASS of it. Hiyoko let her suck for a few minutes before forcing her off “I haven't told you what to do yet!” He groped her breasts with one hand as she shoved the tip against her mouth “Beg for me~” Mahiru stuttered wildly as she tried to speak “Pl-please H-Hiyoko~ Shove that cock in me!!!”

Hiyoko fucked Mahiru's throat like a fucktoy, thrusting in and out at fast speeds. Choking sounds coming from Mahiru as Hiyoko indulged himself in his revenge, speaking of he needs to invite Hajime over~ “Hey Mahiru, invite that cuck of a bf you have over here~ he needs to know that I'm the boss around here, especially if you~” Mahiru brought out her phone, but due to her mind being melted from the pleasure it took her awhile to finish the text. There were a couple of typos but she didn't care, after all Hiyoko just came a huge load down her throat.

Hajime walked to Hiyoko's door confused, Mahiru wanted to meet him here but he couldn't imagine why. But that became clear to him as he opened the door, he saw what he couldn't unsee. Hiyoko was fucking a naked Mahiru in a mating press, they both were facing him and Mahiru was moaning loudly in a lewd voice that Hajime hadn't heard from her before. Hiyoko was thrusting at extreme speeds with his- fucking enormous cock, Hiyoko smiled evily at Hajime “I'm teaching you a lesson Hajime~ Mahiru is mine~” Hajime was hard at this point as he tried to back away. “Don't you dare try to fucking leave!!! I thought I explained this to you, are you fucking deaf?” Hajime stopped moving, he felt too intimidated by Hiyoko even though realistically he was no threat.

Hiyoko had fucked Mahiru in front of Hajime for an hour straight before cumming deep into her pussy, then he got up still hard and walked over to Hajime “Strip Hajime” Hajime did so obediently, showing off his tiny cock which Hiyoko laughed at “Tiny Hajime~ can't believe she picked that over this~” He shoved Hajime onto his knees, forcing him to stare down his cock. Then he stepped on him until he bowed down to him, he cackled at him. Mahiru had limped over to him, Hiyoko kissed her deeply while groping her freckled plump ass.

He spanked it hard, still with one foot on Hajime. Hiyoko then brought Mahiru in front of him, both her feet on Hajimes back as he began to fuck her ass hard. “AHHHH~ HIYOKO~~~” Hiyoko spanked her “What did I tell you to call me?” She kept moaning “MASTER~~~” Hiyoko fucked her ass like it was a replaceable pillow, he moaned out as he loved her ass. Hajime had came already, despite the situation he was quite aroused.

Hiyoko fucked her extremely hard, he thrusted at speeds unimaginable. He continued this ruthlessly fucking for hours as Hajime eventually fell unconscious. Hiyoko came in her ass, then he backed away smiling wide “Mahiru, you'll make a great harem girl~” Mahiru giggled as she walked over to him “Thanks~ I'll always be here for you~” Hiyoko made out with her as they weren't yet done with fucking that night, both had forgotten about Hajime.

#danganronpa smut #dr-saionji-R18 #dr-hinata-R18 #dr-koikzumi-R18

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nebulous-library · 2 years ago

Text

my thoughts will echo your name until i see you again

Series: Tokyo Revengers Pairing: Kokonoi Hajime x Reader Word count: 5.1k Genre/Content/Tags: Not Safe For Worms - violent themes bc part of this takes place in the Bonten timeline, so if you're not comfortable witnessing Bonten!Koko put a gun in someone's mouth, now it the time to close tab, heavy manga spoilers, do not read if you haven't finished the manga, this fic will not make sense to you, not quite a soulmate au, more of an interwoven destiny kinda love, finding each other in different timelines basically, you’ll see, trust me, i promise the only thing spicy in this fic is the one big Bonten flashback, which just has like standard high level organized crime and violence type shit, u get to see koko get hella businessy and rough with someone who deserved it, yw, anyway just read the summary

[Read on AO3]

**MINORS DNI || 18+ ONLY**

Summary: You were Koko’s girl in the Bonten timeline. However, when the timeline resets, neither of you have ever met. Are you still destined to be? On a chance encounter in the Good Timeline, you stumble upon each other. You feel a magnetic pull and can’t help feeling like you know each other somehow already. “Do you think love can transcend lifetimes?”

A/N: ...I couldn't hold it back any longer, I wanted to release one of my Koko fics out into the world. This hasn't been beta-read either, I don't wanna burden my beta reader too much with all she has going on.

Once again though, if you're not cool reading about Bonten Timeline Koko blowing someone's brains out, like, literally not sexually, now is your chance to tap out.

If not, then Bone Apple Teeth, my friends.

You didn’t want to do this. You didn’t even know these people. You were only going because Chiyo’s date bailed on her at the last minute. Flaky jackass, you thought to yourself, cursing him for inadvertently sticking you with the task of attending the wedding of a pair of strangers with your friend in his stead.

Chiyo had told you all about her childhood friend and now-coworker Hina – how kind and friendly she was, how easily she lit up a room and drew people to her, how you’d absolutely love her and wouldn’t at all feel out of place at this wedding. Chiyo was right about all but one of those things.

The ceremony itself was sweet. You almost felt like you, too, had grown up with this couple and watched their love blossom into what it was now. They cared for each other dearly and it showed. Chiyo introduced you to the bride as the couple made their rounds at the reception, and she had indeed been correct in her assessment – Hina truly was a delight. The only thing Chiyo had been wrong about, though, was your ability to feel at home in this sea of countless strangers. Each of them had something deep and personal to say about the ceremony, or a story to swap about Hina and her husband and the adventures of their youth. You felt like the token fish out of water.

Your only friend in this foreign place was long gone, busy catching up with the other teachers from the elementary school, leaving you to your own devices. Rather than stand around and stick out like a sore thumb, you made your way to the open bar to busy yourself with a nice peach bellini to ease the anxiety. You sighed as you sat down on the barstool, pinching your temples as the bartender worked on your drink.

It would have been one thing if you were just alone in an unfamiliar place, but it didn’t help that you were fucking exhausted. At this point, you couldn’t recall the last time you’d had a solid night’s rest. Every time you shut your eyes, no matter how tired you were, your slumber was interrupted by strange dreams that consistently jolted you awake. Most were in the form of blurry vignettes of scenes you didn’t recognize, but that felt like memories nonetheless – low-lit tables with briefcases of bills, long drives through the city at night, taking in the view from inside the confines of some foreign luxury car, what seemed like drug deals that had potential to turn violent at any moment, crime scenes you got the sense you probably shouldn’t be at… All these little snippets would flash through your mind.

At first these visions didn’t faze you, and you’d wake up like you always did in the mornings. You chalked it up to an overly active imagination or eating too close to bedtime. You thought it was weird that you were seemingly having recurring dreams, and it frustrated you that you couldn’t pinpoint the source of them. You tried to let it go, thinking you were reading too much into it, but the dreams only got more vivid from there.

You soon became familiar with a cast of characters that would show up in these visions. You never saw exactly what they looked like, but you could tell their presences apart from one another by their mannerisms and voices – a strange sword-wielding eccentric who was all too eager for the chance to draw his blade, a duo that seemed to always at each other’s throats (probably brothers, you figured), their quiet and serious leader whose words sent a chill through your bones. These were undoubtedly dangerous men, but the strangest part was that in each of these dreams, you felt no fear. Like you belonged there. Like their presence didn’t faze you in the slightest.

There was another, perhaps the most prominent, figure present in almost every one of your dreams as of late – a man with silver hair that fell straight at his shoulder, frequently dressed in red and gold silks. He was always there, and he always brought you a sense of calmness. His voice was buttery smooth and even playful at times, sending shivers down your spine.

Your visions of him were considerably more detailed than the rest, and frankly it alarmed you. As you “saw” him more and more regularly, the less convinced you were that these were just dreams. While the others came in flashes and vignettes, of him you could see whole scenarios play out.

_____

In the most recent instance you’d seen him, you were seated beside him in the passenger seat of his Rolls-Royce, pulling up to a shady-looking building that you were almost certain was condemned. He clicked off the engine.

“Just a quick stop. You stay here,” he’d said with a kiss to the side of your head as he gathered his things – a black folio and a revolver – and headed into the towering building that loomed over you. You got the sense that he tried his best to keep you as far out of harm’s way as he could. But that didn’t mean your curiosity didn’t get the better of you.

In all fairness, you did try to be patient, but you hadn’t expected this “quick stop” to take quite so long. And to be perfectly honest, you were more unnerved by sitting alone in the alley than you were by whatever job he had gone off to take care of. You quietly unlocked the door, looking vigilantly at your surroundings, peeled yourself off the leather seat, and exited, lightly shutting the door behind you.

You removed your heels before proceeding into the building. It was dark inside, not a single soul in sight as you entered the dusty foyer. If this building was used at all, surely it wasn’t for anything that was able to operate in daylight hours. Your feet padded on the cool black and white tile as you approached the grand staircase at the center of the room. Your fingertips grazed the knob of the post at the base of the railing, and you paused, taking in your surroundings. You imagined this was once a place where important people gathered, judging by the ornate architecture and elegant mural-clad walls. The moonlight streaming in from the windows above caught each dust particle floating like feathers in the stale air, assuring you no one had congregated in this place in a good long while.

Just to be sure, you double checked that you had your knife in its holster at your thigh, before tiptoeing your way up the rich mahogany stairway. You passed the second floor, just as dead as the last, and continued on to the third, from which you swore you could hear some sort of commotion. You headed in the direction of the noise, eventually finding what appeared to be the sole lit room in the building.

You peered in the doorway.

Before you was a room with walls covered in clear plastic that was completely empty, save for an old couch pressed against the wall, and a singular chair in the center of the tarp-covered floor. Facing away from the door was a man strapped to the chair, thrashing against his restraints and trying desperately to cry out despite the gag in his mouth.

The man in red slowly walked circles around him, like a shark with its prey. The heels of his shoes clacked authoritatively with each steady stride as he read off a list of amounts of money, each considerably more than the last.

“….and finally, an ¥80,000,000 charge. Do you have any idea the kind of debt you’ve racked up, Mr. Yamada?” he interrogated, his folio snapping shut in his left hand before he tucked it gracefully under his arm.

Muffled cries were the only response.

You heard the trill of the metal chamber of his freshly-loaded revolver spinning, stopping with a click.

“Or with whom you’ve accrued it?”

The barrel was pressed firmly to the side of the restrained man’s head, and he sobbed louder.

“Bonten intends to collect. One payment method or another.” He pulled the gag out of his victim’s mouth. “Now then…any last words?”

Whatever Mr. Yamada said was barely coherent, some mixture of blubbering and pleading for his life and just a little more time.

The man in red acted quickly, kicking square against Mr. Yamada’s chest, knocking him onto his back on the floor, floundering as he begged. Cries of “no” and “please” spilled from his lips as the man you’d arrived with crouched over him, one ornate stiletto on either side of his victim’s torso, and pressed the gun between his eyes. He raked his fingers through the man’s hair, yanking back to meet his own gaze as he trailed the barrel down Mr. Yamada’s cheek, slipping it between his lips as he screamed.

“Time to pay the piper,” the gunman said teasingly, before his expression darkened in an instant. “Pick a god and pray.”

Bang.

He sighed as he rose to his full stature, looking at the darkened red splotches on his clothing, resigned to the mess and wiping down his gun with a dry portion of his sleeve.

“I hate getting my hands dirty,” he complained.

The pink-haired man quietly seated on the sofa stood up. “You say that, but you sure looked like you were having fun with it. ‘Pick a god and pray’?” he asked mockingly.

“Oh, stuff it. I may get caught up in the moment but that doesn’t mean I enjoy the mess.”

The other man simply shrugged in response. “I’m just saying you’re not as big of a buzzkill as you let them think you are. You should take it as a compliment.” He strode closer, kicking at the soiled plastic tarp as he approached the deceased. “Even if you did have to go and be all uptight about putting all this crap down.”

The silver-haired man sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s because last time, somebody didn’t take precautions and it made cleanup a nightmare for everyone else,” he said pointedly.

“I take back what I said before – you are a buzzkill.”

A hush fell over the room for a brief moment, and you leaned in further to try and get a better view. The men inside, however, reacted in an instant at the patter of your feet against the floor breaking the silence. Thinking they’d been followed at the sight of your shadow, the silver-haired man quickly pointed his firearm toward the doorway as his companion drew his katana from its sheath.

“Who’s there?” he shouted, his voice more demanding than questioning, the echo hanging over you in the hall where you stood.

“It’s me!” you cried out quickly, before he had a chance to fire a warning shot in your direction.

“Princess?” his voice softened, sounding almost troubled. “What are you doing – Nevermind. Just…stay right there, okay? I don’t want you seeing this,” his voice called back to you. You thought it was sweet that he tried to preserve your innocence. It was like he didn’t know the way being near him while he worked thrilled you.

After some brief arguing with the other man over cleanup details, he emerged from the room, placing his palm on the small of your back and briskly escorting you out.

“I thought I told you to stay out here,” he said, more concern in his voice than anger as you approached the car.

“I tried, really! It was just…spooky all quiet,” you pouted, following him as he opened the trunk, going for the stash of sanitary wipes and a fresh suit from the cleaners. He looked down the alley toward the main road to be sure no one was coming before stripping and wiping himself down and changing into the clean clothing, shoving the sullied items into a black trash bag he tied off and stuck in the trunk to be disposed of later.

As he pulled the lid down, you snaked your fingers up the pressed lapel, tracing the pinstripes up to his neck. “Besides,” you said, thumbing over the single speck of blood he’d missed, wiping it clean. “You’re sexy when you work.”

He caught your hand in his, holding it firmly against his chest. He looked calm, but you could feel his heart racing. Was it the adrenaline? Or was it just what you did to him?

The two of you stood there for a moment in silence before you piped up,”...Are you mad at me?”

The very thought was extinguished in an instant, his lips pressed firmly and tenderly against yours. They were soft and warm and full of love, leaving you breathless when he pulled away.

“How could I ever be mad?”

And with that, he opened your door, ushering you into the vehicle, and climbing in the other side. If you hurried, you might still make your dinner reservations.

As he put his hand on the gear shift, you playfully trailed your fingers up his wrist and the back of your hand. He smirked, slipping his hand atop yours, roughly gripping down, and pulling the gear shift into drive – and you were off.

_____

Even now, it was like you could still feel his lingering touch. his fingers interlocked with yours. You watched your own fingers as you drummed on the counter, envisioning his warm palm laid over the back of your hand and his finger – long and elegant but still strong and firm – interlocked with yours. You groaned, burrowing your face into the crook of your elbow. You were really losing sleep, losing your mind over someone whose face you’d never even seen before. Someone who didn’t even exist.

You couldn’t help it, though. Once your head hit the pillow and consciousness left you, all it took was for one scene to play out, and your body’s reaction to it would yank you back to this plane of existence. It was forceful, like part of you was clinging with all its might, desperate for just a moment longer in this other land. Like that part of your soul was ripped away from where it knew it belonged.

Your mind drifted to him once again, to the moment you’d known that you must have loved him. It was late. There you were, with him in his bed, in a room several stories above the tops of other apartment buildings in the area, the only light in the room being that which filtered in through the floor-length windows from the vivacious night life of the city below. It was a lively area, but nowhere that anyone would come looking for him. The sirens that wailed in the distance were on the trail of another. This was your own personal oasis, hidden in plain sight.

It was all a blur, though. There could have been nothing surrounding you, honestly. There was him, and only him.

The taste of his kiss was fresh on your lips as he gathered you in his arms. You laid on your sides, facing each other, chests flush against one another. He clutched you tightly, like part of him thought you would vanish if he let go, and you buried your face against his collarbone, one hand pressed against his heart.

You recalled the feeling of hot tears dripping onto your neck as he kissed up your jaw to your cheek, lingering upon reaching their destination. But what echoed in your mind even now were the words he muttered – “I wouldn’t know what to do if I ever lost you too.”

Even thinking about it now made your heart leap in your chest. Something deep within you so vehemently rebuked the thought that he could merely be a figment of your overactive imagination that you were almost constantly plagued with these memories. You really were just losing your mind, you thought to yourself.

You sighed, sitting up as the bartender slid you your beverage. You thanked him, sure that the relieved look in your eyes more than conveyed your gratitude. He offered a shallow bow in response as if to say, “Just doing my job.”

Oh, that sweet, sweet first sip. It wasn’t very strong, but nonetheless provided the brief reprieve from the swirling storm of your own thoughts that you needed. You took a deep breath, stretching your neck to either side and taking a moment to let the alcohol do its thing and bring you the relaxation you craved.

You swiveled around in your seat and crossed your legs, surveying the crowded reception hall as you nursed your drink.

The groom was being swarmed by a herd of gentlemen who looked as if they had almost nothing in common – like he was their uniting factor. You could tell from the way they fussed over and clung to him that he was without a doubt an important figure in all their lives. It was sweet. You couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at the corner of your mouth.

Amidst the men was one in particular who looked to be having the time of his life. He couldn’t be much taller than 5’4”, and was currently dodging the grasp of a considerably taller man with his dark hair in a braided ponytail who was chasing him down. A handful of the others simply stood back and watched as the short one evaded capture. A tan man with glasses and slicked blonde hair pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, walking off somewhere to talk to one of the photographers. You kept your eyes on the chase, wondering just how long these two could keep at it.

That was when you heard it – that laugh.

It came from somewhere across the room and made your ears burn. Your head jerked in the direction it came from, and there you saw him.

He stood by the hors d’oeuvres fable, chatting with a hulking behemoth of a man wearing a paisley scarf and a wild grin. You could barely see him around the other man’s broad shoulders, but there he was. His dark hair was swept to the side, white streaks peppered in, adding to the shape and volume. His eyes twinkled with mirth and mischief as he spoke to who you assumed was his long-time friend.

You studied him as he raised his beverage to his lips, fixating on the delicate way he wrapped his fingers around the glass. Those fingers. You knew those fingers.

You shook your head to yourself. What the hell are you thinking, projecting your imaginary boyfriend onto a stranger? Get a grip, you chided yourself. But you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. The way he carried himself, the whimsical glint in his eyes…this wasn’t anybody you’d ever seen before, but still, your soul was screaming. The tension within you felt like pulling magnets apart.

That was when he glanced your way, and your heart just about leapt out of your chest. It was only for a split second, but it felt like an eternity. His eyes absolutely and without a doubt landed on yours.

“That’s him. That’s absolutely him,” said the burning sensation in your chest.

You were relieved the instant his glance passed over you, but it didn’t last long. You were about to get up and walk out before you made a complete idiot of yourself – Chiyo would understand if you explained to her later. You needed to not be here. But before you could make a single move, he did a double take, looking puzzled for a moment, as if he thought he’d spotted someone he knew.

His eyes widened when you made eye contact that second time.

Quickly, he knocked back the rest of his drink, handing the empty glass to his friend and briskly walking in your direction.

No, this is insane, you told yourself. I have to get out of here. You fumble in your purse, rummaging for your keys as you stand up.

But the instant you tried to take a step, his hand was on your bicep.

“Excuse me,” he called, almost panicked.

You turned to him, and time stilled. As his face came into full view, you knew.

It was him.

“I swear this isn’t a pickup line, but do we know each other?”

The part of you that wanted to run and hide was at war with the part that wanted to throw yourself at him and say you’ve been searching for him, and the result was you simply standing there, floundering for words as your wide eyes met his.

This couldn’t really be happening.

“Hajime?”

The name spilled from your lips before you realized it, like it had been on the tip of your tongue all this time. The name you’d never heard, but somehow you knew. It was him.

His breath hitched, the shock continuing to spread on his face. “You do know me, don’t we? And I know you…but I’ve never seen you before? This is insane, right? But you’ve been seeing it too, haven’t you? The visions?”

It was happening.

“How did you –” you stammered.

“I don’t know, but it’s you, right? You’re the one who’s been in all those weird dreams with Mikey and the Haitanis and everyone in that organization? I mean, not that I knew what you looked like before or anything, but when I looked over here something just pulled me,” he rambled, sounding as insane as you felt.

He takes both your hands in his and you respond with a small nod.

“I-I thought I was crazy,” you managed to stutter, squeezing his hands as if you still don’t believe he was right there in front of you. You wanted to cry, to throw yourself into his arms, but refrained, not wanting to cause a scene.

“I thought I was crazy,” he repeated back.. “And they always feel so real, too. Shit…” He brought his hand to his forehead in disbelief.

The two of you paused, letting everything sink in. You’d both been having these strange visions set in some other lifetime, each featuring one another. But what did it even mean?

The look on your face must have said it all.

“...Let’s go talk somewhere a little more private,” he suggested.

You nodded, and he laced his fingers in yours, leading you out to the gardens on the church’s second floor courtyard.

Hajime led you to the bench, dusting it off with his handkerchief and offering you his hand as you sat down. You took it, not wanting to pass up another opportunity to check whether or not he was real. So far, all signs still pointed to yes.

He sat down beside you, still holding your hand, but leaning back, looking up at the sky, covered in sherbet-colored clouds and obscured by the foliage above. He gave your hand a squeeze.

You sat there in silence, examining him. It was evident on his face that he was processing everything. He would look at you, then back up, then glance back at you again, and look up again. His chest was heaving, and you couldn’t explain what possessed you to do this, but you let your free hand wander, trailing up his torso before landing above his heart. The same flutter, the same rhythm from your dreams. It really was him.

As soon as you flinched to withdraw your hand, he caught it in his, holding you there, now looking directly into your eyes.

“Do you think love can transcend lifetimes?” he asks, catching you by surprise.

“I…suppose I hadn’t really thought about it until recently…” you muttered, trailing off.

“...Yeah, me neither.”

A beat.

“...And we’re sure that we’ve been seeing the same things?” you piped up.

He sat upright and turned to face you properly.

“Did you see the tattoos?” he asked, motioning to where his had been on the side of his head.

You nodded.

“And the others had them too, right?”

“Yeah, there were a couple with them like, on their throats? I think?” you replied.

He nodded. “Yeah! I think they had their hair the same as they do now, actually. And Mikey had his on the back of his neck?”

You nodded again. “You keep saying those names like I know them,” you said.

He tilted his head. “But you know mine –”

“I didn’t until a minute ago,” you said, cutting him off. “I don’t…I don’t even know how I knew. As soon as I saw you, it kind of just…came out of my mouth?” You shook your head, looking at him to see if any of this sounded less sane to him.

“Seriously?” he smiled, leaning back again. Dropping your hands, he brought both of his to his face, rubbing at his eyes and letting out a sigh. He leaned back again, letting his head drop as he laughed.

He looked at you again, left forearm pressed against his head as he reached to take both your hands in his right.

“Well, I’m convinced. Confused as hell, but convinced.”

“I think I’m in the same boat,” you said. “But wait, how come you know who the others are? I never saw anybody very clearly.”

“Really? …Well, it could also have to do with the fact that I’ve known those guys most of my life. You probably just met them tonight, too.”

“‘Met them tonight’?” you asked. “What do you mean I met them tonight?”

He sat up again, his salt and pepper hair bouncing as he looked toward you. “They’re all in there,” he said, jabbing his thumb in the direction of the reception hall.

“What? Really?” You sprang to your feet, trying to look into the window meters away.

He stood up, resting a hand on your shoulder. “Wanna meet them?” he suggested, ushering you back that direction.

“What? N-no, I couldn’t, I-I-,” you protested, digging in your heels.

“Fine, fine, you don’t have to go meet anybody,” he chuckled. Your shyness was endearing. “At least let me point them out to you, yeah?”

Cautiously, you followed along as he walked you to the window.

He was right. The pair that you’d assumed were twins were Ran and Rindou Haitana, who owned a club in Roppongi, the man with the katana was Haruchiyo Akashi, who was at the wedding with his sister with whom he shared a Youtube channel, and that silent, mysterious leader was the short guy who was being chased around earlier. Hajime pointed out the others, and briefly told you about their collective history with the Tokyo Manji Gang in high school, and about the groom, Takemichi, who, alongside Mikey, had brought together so many people from different walks of life and made everyone feel like they had a true home and family to call their own.

The way he smiled looking in at them made your heart melt. He wasn’t the same person he had been in your dreams, but he was still someone whose soul was etched into yours, and someone you could see yourself loving in this lifetime as well.

He turned to you, raising your hand to his lips. “And you already know me, but allow me to introduce myself formally. Hajime Kokonoi, co-president of TK&KO. Pleasure to make your acquaintance.” His lips barely brushed against your knuckles, and you felt your face flush.

The two of you stayed out there as the sun went down, spending heaven knows how long just talking and getting to know about each other – what types of things you’d seen in your dreams, what you liked and disliked, what your hopes for the future were. It was dark before either of you realized, and things were beginning to wind down inside.

“...Guess we should probably go back in, huh?” you asked, shivering as the evening chill set in.

Upon noticing, Hajime shucked his jacket, draping it over your shoulders.

“Aw, but we’re having so much fun out here,” he pouted, that mischivous look in his eyes once again. From where you were, you could still hear the DJ spinning tracks – this one was particularly slow. He bowed, extending his hand to you. The instant you took it, he pulled you in close, his left hand pressed flat against the middle of your back.

You were interrupted, however, by a golden-haired man in a yellow suit.

“Koko, are you –? Oh,” he said, surprised to be catching the two of you in this position.

Hajime sighed, releasing you from his hold.

“One more person for you to meet,” he said, gesturing toward the intruder. “This is Inupi, we’ve known each other since we were children.”

Inupi gave you a small wave and a nod before turning his attention back to Koko. “Mikey wants us to take a group photo with Takemicchi and sent me to find you.”

“I’ll be there in a minute.”

The look on Inupi’s face said, “You’d better be.” But when Hajime waved him off, he went back inside regardless.

“Well, so much for our evening,” he said.

“It is getting pretty late. What time is it?”

He shrugged. “Dunno. You have my phone,” he nodded, gesturing at the jacket on your shoulders.

“Oh, here, let me –” you started to shrug it off your shoulders, and he stopped you.

“Ah, ah, I got it,” he said, reaching into the pocket on the side, taking a moment to feel around for his phone. “Got it. Oh, it’s only 10 o’clock,” he said, as if that wasn’t already most of the night.

He walked you back inside, and you saw Chiyo and one of her other friends having their last round at the bar. She noticed you and waved you over. You waved back and held up a finger, telling her you’d be just a minute.

You and Hajime bade each other adieu, and as he walked over to his group, you realized you still had his coat.

“Oh! Hajime, wait, your jacket!” you called after him.

He turned around and continued walking backwards. “Keep it safe for me until next time! Check the pocket,” he said, playfully sticking his tongue out at you.

As you walked toward the bar, you stuck your hand into the pocket he’d fished his phone out of, finding nothing but a business card. His business card. You pulled it out and looked at it.

“There you are! I was looking for you all night!” Chiyo said, bubbly and drunkenly. “Who’s that guy?”

“Oh, y’know, a guy…” you said, only half paying attention as you examined the card. You flipped it over to reveal what you could only assume was Hajime’s cell number, and a message –

“Not losing you again. See you in my dreams.”

You decided to text him when you got home.

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