#haha I still like listening to it and thinking of Aur

[arcxnumvitae]

Someone holds me safe and warm. Horses prance through a silver storm. Figures dancing gracefully across my memory.

[bvidzsoo]

Seeker

 Author: bvidzsoo

 Warnings: none

 Pairing: Byun Baekhyun x female reader

 Word count:  10, 127

 Summary:  You and Byun Baekhyun had known each other since the moment you were born. But a new year at Hogwarts brings new surprises. So what happens when Baekhyun becomes the new Seeker for the Gryffindor Quidditch team and starts forgetting about you and your friendship?

 A/N: Hey! My Baekhyun one shot is here and omg it’s 3 am and I’m supposed to wake up at 5 am haha, don’t let this flop just because once again it’s long, enjoy now!

     Byun Baekhyun and I had known each other since the day we were born. Our parents grew up together and even live next to each other. It was destined for us to be friends and therefore, Byun Baekhyun is my best friend I never imagined I’d have. He’s amazing...he knows when to make me laugh, when to pull me away from a fight, when to save me from my boredom and the most important, he knows all my secrets...because best friends aren’t supposed to keep secrets from each other. And because no one is perfect, there’s one major flaw Baekhyun seems to have...his huge pride. He might be nice and amazing but sometimes his mouth asks for a beating. He can gloat about himself for days and turn a blind eye to those around him, sometimes that person being me. He’s not uncaring, just too full of himself that he won’t see people need him too to listen. But knowing him for my whole life, I know when to tell him to stop and control him. 

Like right now, keeping a grip on his sleeve as we push our carts towards the big red train. It’s another year at Hogwarts, our fifth, and to my utter happiness, I was chosen to be a Prefect. I wasn’t expecting it, but at the same time I was. I’m one of the best students in our year so it shouldn’t have been a big surprise. Baekhyun knows already as I raced to their house to share the news with him the day I got the letter, but I decided to keep it as a surprise from our other friends.

“Yo, Baekhyun, hurry!” The deep voice of Park Chanyeol startled both of us as his head was stuck out the opened window, grinning widely towards us.

“Yes, you better hurry!” Baekhyun’s mother yelped, eyes cast at her Muggle wristwatch “The train leaves in five minutes!”

“That’s plenty of time for us to get on, mom” Baekhyun huffed as our luggage was transported onto the train, flying in the air before disappearing inside the train.

“Y/N” My father’s soft voice gained my attention as I turned to look at him, “You’ll have to spend another Christmas at Hogwarts, but do send us as many owls as you can. And your present will be in the Common Room before you can blink”

“That’s alright, dad” I smiled at my parents, a little sad that I had to part from them for so long, but then again...Hogwarts is just like my home.

“Have a good year, and don’t do anything unaccepted” Mom winked at me as I quickly hugged them both and rushed up onto the train as steam filled the air, the train ready to leave.

“They act like they won’t see us for years” Baekhyun huffed, gripping my hand as we made our way down the crowded corridors. 

“You know it’s because they love us, stop being like that” I squeezed his hand, getting an eye roll in response.

“I bet you’ll be a sappy parent too” An annoying grin graced Baekhyun’s pretty lips but before I could curse him, the compartment door to our right opened and there stood Chanyeol with Joy in toe.

“There are the lovers” Chanyeol gripped Baekhyun before pulling him inside, a huff leaving my lips.

“Seriously, will you stop calling us that?” I glared at Chanyeol while closing the door, “It’s been five years, seriously…”

“If he hasn’t stopped, do you think he will stop now?” Joy asked, her hands on her hips as a big smile appeared on my lips.

“Joy!” I exclaimed, pulling her into a tight hug.

“Y/N!” She shared my excitement as she patted my back, slightly towering over me with her height.

“So loud” Chanyeol muttered with a glare, taking a seat beside the window.

“You know…I haven’t missed you at all” I stuck my tongue out as I took my seat beside Chanyeol.

“Liar” He grinned back, pulling me into a side hug.

“I did not miss your loudmouth” I shrugged at him as he only chuckled and pulled out a little bag.

“And here I was waiting for you with a little surprise” Chanyeol faked a sigh as my eyes widened, eyeing the familiar bag.

“Are those--”

“German candies?” Joy shrieked, snatching the bag from Chanyeol’s hand, falling back onto the seat beside Baekhyun.

“And they are not for you” Chanyeol said with a glare, leaning forward to snatch the bag back, “I brought them for Y/N, if she wants to share them, she will”

I smiled brightly at Chanyeol before accepting the little present, giving him a grateful kiss on the cheek, “You are the best!”

“Hey!” Baekhyun exclaimed, pushing his round glasses up the bridge of his nose, as he threw Chanyeol a small glare.

“And that’s how you get someone else’s girl” He winked teasingly at Baekhyun before I nudged him with my elbow in the stomach. He whined as I shared my candy with Joy who wouldn’t stop giggling.

“How was summer?” Baekhyun asked after a big yawn, me sending a disgusted look at him as he didn’t bother to cover his mouth, “Mine was boring, the old same. Staying home, practicing Quidditch and sometimes going in town to those Muggles”

“Am I boring?” I scoffed, making Chanyeol chuckle.

“You kinda are” He whispered, earning a loud laugh from Baekhyun, to which I could only glare at.

“Anyways, my summer was nice, unlike Baekhyun’s” I threw him a sweet smile before looking at Chanyeol, “We went to France, it was really magical”

“I keep telling mom to take me there and she won’t” Joy grimaced as she popped a gummy bear in her mouth, “So I had to spend summer in Scotland with my grandparents, which was surprisingly fun. There’s a new boy in town, quite handsome as well”

“You find a boy every week, Joy” Chanyeol and Baekhyun chuckled, bumping their fists.

“This one is different” She hissed at the two annoying boys.

“You said that about Minseok last year too?” Chanyeol scratched his chin, grinning when Joy’s cheeks changed to a reddish color.

“Merlin curse both of you!” She snapped at the two amused boys before looking away, eyes on me only. I chuckled quietly, looking at Chanyeol as he cleared his throat.

“I traveled across Germany with my father once again and thought of your liking of these sweets, so yeah...I really didn’t do anything new” He shrugged and I smiled, offering him some candy.

“You know the Seeker of the team graduated last year?” Joy spoke up, turning to Baekhyun, “Are you going to tryout?”

“I was just about to tell you” Baekhyun smiled that charming smile, his glasses falling a little lower on his nose, “I’m pretty confident I will make it onto the team, I’ve been practicing for years now”

“He’s really good” I said nodding with a smile, Chanyeol humming beside me as he popped a chocolate frog in his mouth.

“Anyways, I have some news too” I stood up, pulling out my robe from my little purse, “Look!”

I pointed at my Prefect badge, Chanyeol’s eyes budging while Joy smiled brightly.

“I told you you’d make it!” She chuckled, happy for me “Congratulations”

“Oh no, I can’t tell you anymore when I want to prank someone” Chanyeol’s eyebrows furrowed as I chuckled, leaning closer to his ear.

“What others don’t know, can’t hurt them” I winked as I pulled away, a big grin forming on his lips. I pulled on the robe, smiling back at an already smiling Baekhyun.

“I’ll go to the Pefect’s compartment now, see you at Hogwarts!” I waved as I left my friends behind, feet padding quietly down the corridor in search for the Prefect’s compartment.

--

     After arriving at Hogwarts yesterday, we had the feast and I took care of my Prefect duties before joining Joy, Lisa, Yuna, Su in our dorm, sharing stories of our summers. In the morning, we got our schedule for the year before making our ways to class. We had Charms first, happy to know that I didn’t share only two classes with Baekhyun. Since we got to class a little earlier than usual, I dragged Baekhyun to the front and took our seast, Professor Flitwick sending us a smile.

“Hello, Professor” I greeted respectfully while Baekhyun lay his head on the desk, round glasses almost falling off.

“Hello, Miss Kang” The Professor greeted back, already blind to Baekhyun’s antics, “How was your summer?”

“Quite pleasant and yours?” Students started to fill the class and Flitwick rose to his feet.

“Very good, very good” He nodded, eyeing all the students. We were sharing class with the Ravenclaws, the Gryffindors happy to be out of attention range of Flitwick, if only it was that easy. The Professor rose to his stool, that made him taller, before welcoming everyone to another year at Hogwarts, telling us his expectations of us and our grades. More simply put, the same thing we’ve been hearing for five years now.

Cushions appeared on each desk as Flitwick grinned excitedly, “Today we’ll be revising the Banishing Charm, please, what is the incantations name again?”

Lot’s of hands shoot up in the aur, a victorious smile appearing on Flitwick’s lips. Baekhyun groaned beside me as I tried to raise my hand higher than the other straight backed sitting Ravenclaw’s. I nudged Baekhyun as he pulled the cushion and placed it underneath his head.

“Miss Kang?” Flitwick pointed his hand at me and I sat up straighter.

“It’s called Depulso, Professor” I answered steadily, Baekhyun nudging my leg underneath the table.

“Very well, ten points to Gryffindor” I smiled as the professor turned to the groans of Ravenclaw’s, as they weren’t chosen.

“No need to be sad, you’ll get the chance to earn some points too!” Flitwick was quick to exclaim as he brushed his hands together, “We’ll be practicing the spell for a little time to make sure everyone still remembers it before continuing with our lessons”

“Baekhyun, get up” I muttered as I picked up my wand, nudging his head softly.

“I know the spell, Y/N, let me sleep” He muttered back, voice muffled by his arm.

“You were supposed to sleep last night, I just earned us ten points, I suggest you do something productive so we don’t lose those points, Byun” I muttered sternly, making Baekhyun groan.

“You are giving me a headache, I swear on Merlin’s beard” 

“Merlin had no beard, get--” I gripped the edge of the cushion before yanking on it “Up!”

“Auch, Y/N, that hurt!” Baekhyun exclaimed, rubbing his temple and pushing his glasses up as the other students glanced at us.

“Ah, Mr. Byun, I see you decided to join us” Professor Flitwick said with a sarcastic smile.

“Yeah...I did” Baekhyun muttered with a grimace, pointing his wand at me.

“What are you doing?” I asked, slightly alarmed at his actions.

“I should just banish you instead, what do you think?” Baekhyun started grinning, leaning closer to me as my eyebrows furrowed.

“I do not agree with that at all” I answered warningly, pointing my wand at him as well. You never know when Baekhyun does something, he’s too sudden.

“I think I’d get us more house points” He kept on taunting, making me huff. I sharply pointed my wand at Baekhyun’s cushion, which was close to his elbow.

“Depulso!” The cushion flew off the table, joining the other cushions already on the floor. Baekhyun gaped at me as he looked at his elbow, thinking I’d direct the spell at him.

“Next time it really will be you” I warned, turning around as Flitwick made his way down from his tall stool, smiling at the students. Baekhyun huffed before sending my own cushion down on the floor, no words leaving his lips.

--

  I pulled my green coat tighter around me as the September breeze was colder and harsher than before.

“If I catch a cold because of you, Byun Baekhyun, you are spending your time with me in the infirmary” I warned as we made our way towards the Quidditch grounds.

“Not really, Madam Pomfrey will just give you one of her magic potions and you’ll be better than before” Baekhyun laughed, dressed in his Quidditch uniform, as I sent him a glare.

“I should be studying in the warm library for our O.W.L’s but here I am…” I muttered more to myself, but Baekhyun heard me nonetheless.

“Bloody hell, Y/N, it’s the first day of the semester and you want to study for the O.W.L’s already?” His eyes were wide as I just shrugged, gripping his arm before he could go falling to the ground, seeing he stumbled into a rock.

“And you will study with me, Baekhyun. You dragged me to your tryouts, I drag you to my study sessions” I let go of Baekhyun as he steadied himself, not missing his small smile. I was always more aware of our surroundings out of the two of us.

“Of course, love, anything for you” Baekhyun grinned before speeding up, leaving me with my mouth open and air stuck in my throat. Love? That’s a new one. I huffed before hurrying after him, going to the stands and taking a seat as the team and those who were here to try out gathered on the field.

Oliver Wood gave out instructions, letting out the Golden Snitch before all those who were trying out for the Seeker position rose into the air, Baekhyun’s eyes landing on me to wink before they were back on the cloudy sky. I smiled before hiding it behind my red scarf, taking my book from my purse, about Muggles, and starting to read as brooms whizzed past me.

--

     Baekhyun was ecstatic about the tryouts last night, telling everyone how he made it into the team for sure. I could only shake my head at him in the Common Room as he bragged to some boys from a year bellow, all paying attention to Baekhyun like their lives depended on it. And it only got worse in the morning when Wood pinned a parchment on the board, in the Common Room, with all the new members on the team, Byun Baekhyun having become the new Seeker for the Gryffindor Quidditch Team. I was, of course, happy for him but I had to hear him brag to every single person, for my happiness to last for a long time.

The four tables in the Great Hall were filled with food for breakfast, the hall slowly filling with more and more students as it got closer for our first classes. Baekhyun was half sitting half standing beside me, the bench between his legs, as his hands gestured faster than his mouth was working.

“And then--you know how cloudy it was yesterday? The clouds were almost black! And the wind was really strong, once it almost knocked me off of my broom, but despite that I stayed up in the air, watching closely for the snitch!” I quietly munched on my toast as the audience around us clung onto Baekhyun’s words, eyes wide and heads nodding whenever Baekhyun asked them something rhetorical.

“And there were like four other people trying out for this position, not like they stood a chance against me, I’ve been training for this before I could even speak--anyways, there was a bolt of lightning far in the distance, lighting up the dark clouds and--” I choked on my pumpkin juice as Baekhyun’s wild hand smacked against my back, startling me. I started coughing loudly as all eyes fell on me, Baekhyun fell onto his butt finally sitting down properly, worried eyes on me as he leaned closer.

“Y/N, bloody hell, Y/N don’t die on me!” He started panicking as I tried to breathe as much air in as I could, my nostrils burning a little, “Are you dying?!”

“Shut up” I croaked out as I finally stopped coughing, picking up the glass of pumpkin juice and taking a small and careful sip.

“She didn’t die” Baekhyun chuckled, patting my head before turning back to his impatient audience, students of all years gathered around us by now. I made eye contact with Joy from across the table, who’s eyebrows were furrowed as a blond haired girl kept on leaning over her, hair dangling onto Joy’s plate. Chanyeol was listening closely to Baekhyun’s words, even if he heard it already many times.

“So the bolt of lightning hit, right? And then I saw a flash of gold beside a guy who was trying out for the Seeker position, he didn’t even hear the Snitch beside him and he wanted the position?” Baekhyun laughed amused, shaking his head as his audience followed him with laughter, “And I flew, knocked the guy off his broom of course, and caught the Snitch. And it only took an hour, Merlin, just one hour!”

The audience ‘awed’ as Baekhyun stood again with a proud grin, his eyes falling on me as I raised my eyebrows at him, “Ask Y/N if my story is true? She’s been there for the whole tryouts, she’s seen it all”

Once again the eyes of his slowly becoming fans were on me and I put on a sweet but fake smile, “He’s not lying. I did see everything, the team is for sure going to win this year”

Baekhyun’s audience cheered, disturbing the other students around us, but the blond haired girl’s eyes seemed to stay on me for longer before Joy glared up at her and pushed her back, the girl huffing at her. Baekhyun suddenly stood up, gathering his books as I eyed him suspiciously, gripping his wrist before he could bolt.

“Baekhyun--”

“Be quick, love, the boys are waiting for me” Joy’s eyes widened as Chanyeol snorted into his pumpkin juice, my eyes narrowing at him.

“You promised to study with me, it’s today. Meet me after your last class in the library, okay?” Baekhyun smiled at me sweetly as I reluctantly let go of his arm, not before calling out for him again, “Baekhyun!”

“Fine, I promise!” He widened his eyes at me before running off to the other end of the table, bumping his fist with a few boys from the Quidditch team.

“He barely made it into the team and he already has fans?” Joy scoffed as she eyed her plate with disgust, “I think I’m finished, wouldn’t want to eat some blonde hair too”

Chanyeol and I chuckled as I turned my head to gaze at Baekhyun before I departed for my first class for today, one I don’t share with Baekhyun, Herbology.

--

  My classes were over for today and I walked to the library alone, having lost Baekhyun in the mass of students eager to go back to their dorms and relax a bit. I pushed open the doors of the library, making sure I was quiet, and nodded at Madam Pince who usually wore a glare but always offered me a small smile. I walked over to my usual seat, by the window, and slowly unpacked my Potions and Arithmancy books, opening the parchment with my homework. Knowing that Baekhyun is usually late, I started first with the Potions homework, knowing he’d definitely need help in Arithmancy, as it is not his forte. After a few minutes of me writing my homework, there was some movement from the other end of the table and I looked up, thinking it was Baekhyun, but I was surprised to see a Ravenclaw boy. Kim Junmyeon. He offered me a smile and walked closer, leaning down to whisper, “Do you mind if I sit by?”

“Of course not” I smiled back and Junmyeon thanked me before going back to his bag and taking a seat, at the end of the table. I looked down at my parchment, a little embarrassed, always having found Junmyeon quite handsome. And his intelligence only made him more attractive. 

And getting lost in solving my homework, I once again lost track of time, but I did not miss Baekhyun’s absence. He never missed out on something he promised to do. I felt a pang in my heart, something I never experienced before. He promised, Baekhyun never breaks his promises to me. Deciding he wouldn’t show up, since he didn’t even bother to until now, with the moon shining, I made my way back to the Gryffindor Common Room, soon having to attend my Prefect duties.

--

     The days seemed to pass faster than I could blink, and soon, we found ourselves at the first Quidditch match of the year, Gryffindor against Ravenclaw. Baekhyun had been speaking about it for the whole week, always being either too busy with practice or too tired for him to spend time with me like we used to earlier. But I tried to understand him, it’s not like we were tied to each other, we both had our sepparate lives and it was okay to have a little space from time to time. Except, this time, it felt like a bad kind of space.

“I’m excited, Baekhyun had been bragging so much about himself…” Joy shouted over the loud voice, “I want to see him playing”

“Oh, he’s good, I’ve been to a few practices” Chanyeol grinned, raising the banner for Baekhyun high up in the air. It was Baekhyun’s name, colored in Gryffindor colors, and a broom that was charmed to move.

“Really?” I asked confused as my eyes found Chanyeol’s, “He told me no one from the outside is allowed to practices”

“Oh that’s weird...last week the Hufflepuff team was there too...and Baekhyun’s little fan club too” My eyebrows furrowed at Chanyeol’s words as Joy turned to look at him as well.

“Fan club? Baekhyun has a fan club already?” She asked confused, eyebrows furrowing.

“Yeah, he is pretty famous” Chanyeol shrugged as Madam Hooch made her way onto the field, whistle raised to her mouth as the two teams, Ravenclaw and Gryffindor made their way onto the field. The captains shook hands before the whistle was blown, both teams pushing off, flying up in the air. The audience started cheering loudly, each for their supported house as Kim Jongin, a Hufflepuff and the announcer, spoke into the microphone. 

For the first few minutes, it was like a cat and mouse game, both teams trying to score while the Gryffindors were sending their bludgers mercilessly at the Ravenclaw’s, who’s defence was better than last year. The Golden Snitch was nowhere to be seen as Angelina scored for the Gryffindors, the supporters going wild. Joy’s shrill voice didn’t do good to my ears as I preferred to cheer more calmly while keeping an eye on Chanyeol, who was jumping up and down with the banner in his hands. The game went on like that, Do Kyungsoo, a Ravenclaw, was almost smashed into a scoring goal while trying to avoid a bludger.

“And there she is! Kang Seulgi--Ten points to Gryffindor!” Kim Jongin’s voice disappeared by the loud roar of the Gryffindor’s as Seulgi scored once again for Gryffindor.

“We are so beating everyone this year!” Chanyeol exclaimed excitedly, those who heard him cheering even louder.

“Wait until they find the Snitch” I chuckled, eyes landing on Baekhyun who was focused, eyes searching as he was waiting for the Snitch to appear. I smiled as I joined the others cheering loudly for the new Seeker, excited for my friend. It was always his dream to join the Quidditch team, I couldn’t help it but feel proud of him.

“There goes Kim--oh. Oh! Byun Baekhyun! He’s suddenly started moving and--Alec Gregorovics is going too! The Snitch, they had seen the Golden Snitch! Now it’s only a matter of time until one of them catches it and--” Everyone held their breaths as Baekhyun and Alec raced broom to broom after the Snitch, Alec trying to push Baekhyun off a few times, trying to gain an advantage. But Baekhyun started suddenly diving towards the ground and I stood up, hands clenched together.

“What is he doing?” I asked, voice coming out panicked as I watched Baekhyun speeding closer and closer to the ground.

“Catching the Snitch!” Chanyeol’s voice came out squeaky as he was barely able to contain himself.

“Byun Baekhyun has caught the Golden Snitch!” Kim Jongin hollered into his microphone as Baekhyun took a sharp turn, hand raised as he raised back steadily, “Gryffindor wins the first match of the year!”

The audience cheered loudly as I smiled widely, clapping for Baekhyun as a big smile adorned his lips, flying around on his broom, showing off his victory. I chuckled when he winked at a group of girls and loud squeals erupted in the stands. 

“Well, I gotta run!” Chanyeol exclaimed, pushing his banner in Joy’s hands, “I have to set up the Common Room”

“For?” I asked as Joy and I stood up, watching Chanyeol as he clumsily almost fell.

“We are celebrating tonight!”

--

  And that we indeed were doing. The Common Room was filled with Gryffindor’s of all ages, those of legal age drinking some punch while the others limited themselves at the pumpkin juice. I sat quietly in front of the fire, watching the others as they danced around, currently waiting for Joy to come back with some snacks. Baekhyun was nowhere to be seen yet, having probably not returned from the Quidditch grounds. Half of the team was here although already, celebrating their victory.

“Here” Joy smiled as she joined me, handing me some sandwich.

“I thought you were bringing snacks?” I asked with a chuckle as I eyed the sandwich.

“I got hungry upon seeing the food so...we aren’t eating snacks anymore” She shrugged as she took a big bite of her sandwich, making me laugh. The door opened and in came Baekhyun, being carried on Chanyeol and Yuto’s shoulders as everyone started cheering and clapping loudly. I grinned standing up, pushing the sandwich into Joy’s hands making her smile at me, before taking off towards Baekhyun. He was laughing, his round glasses close to falling off his nose, Chanyeol still clinging to his shoulder, even after putting him down, as he spoke to some sixth years.

“Baekhyun!” I called with a smile, Baekhyun’s head turning sharply in my direction. A big smile graced his lips as I walked closer to him.

“I told you, didn’t I?” He asked me smugly, opening his arms. I chuckled before running up to him and hugging him, his warmth enveloping my whole being. If someone asked me where my favorite place was on Earth, I’d have to say it’s in Baekhyun’s arms.

“I knew you’d win for us, Baekhyun” I chuckled, whining a little when he squeezed me too hard.

“That’s expected from you, considering you are my best friend” His eyebrows were playfully furrowed as I pulled away from the warm embrace, narrowing my eyes at him.

“That show off dive was unnecessary, you could have collided with the ground!” I exclaimed, taking the effort and pushing up his glasses for him, which were about to fall any minute.

“I had it calculated, don’t worry” He chuckled, winking at me.

“Well, I guess you can bask in your glory tonight” I shrugged, looking around as Baekhyun smirked, leaning a little closer.

“If you don’t mind love, there’s someone looking for me right now, see you around” He winked at me before taking off, leaving me alone staring after him. I tried not to feel hurt or like someone stepped on my heart when I saw Baekhyun heading towards the blond haired girl that we saw in the Great Hall. Convincing myself that it was just some childish feeling, afraid that I’d lose my friend, of course, I forced a smile on my lips before joining Chanyeol and his tall friends.

--

     I was never expecting Baekhyun to stop his bragging after winning the match, but what I truly wasn’t expecting was the masses of girls that seemed to come up to me and ask me what Baekhyun’s favorite color was or what his favorite meal was or where he liked to spend his time and the list goes on. However, what really did it was on a Wednesday morning when I was walking to the Great Hall alone, Joy already left with Su, and half asleep, when black and green robe flashed in front of me and I accidentally collided with a smaller body than mine.

“Watch it, Kang” The feminine voice hissed at me and I narrowed my eyes in the dim light of the hall as I gazed at the girl. Dark brown hair, honey eyes, fair skin and a funny accent...this must be a Zhang.

“You blocked my way, Zhang” I told the girl in front of me lazily as she crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“Anyways...Where’s your friend?”

“Which one?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Byun, of course” Zhang huffed and my jaw clenched.

“Listen, I don’t mean to come off rude or anything...but I’m not answering if you want to ask about Baekhyun, go and ask him yourself, okay?” My voice came out harsher than I was intending to.

“Oh, look at that…” Zhang snarled, eyes glaring at me, “The little best friend is jealous now? Took you long enough to realize you’ll never have Byun for yourself”

“Excuse you?” I asked offended, hoping she wasn’t implying what she was implying.

“You’ll always be” She stepped closer, trying to intimidate me, “the best friend”

I chuckled as she glared at me for another second before turning around and storming off. Nope, I’m definitely not doing this anymore. Whoever wants to find out something about Baekhyun can either ask him or Chanyeol or even Joy.

My mood was worse than usually as I entered the Great Hall, I even succeeded in knocking someone off their feet.

“Merlin, I’m so sorry!” I panicked as my eyes fell on the Ravenclaw boy on the floor, those having seen us now laughing, “I wasn’t looking--”

“It’s my fault, don’t worry” Junmyeon chuckled as he looked up at me with a handsome grin, “I should have made sure no one would enter while I stop in front of the door”

I chuckled, extending a hand for Junmyeon to help him up. He took it with a grateful smile, his hand smooth and warm, making me blush as he gripped mine firmly and rose to his feet.

“I hope next time I won’t be the one knocking you over” Junmyeon winked at me as he let go of my hand, a laugh leaving my lips.

“Yes, let’s hope our next meeting will be more peaceful” Junmyeon showed me his charming smile once again before walking off, leaving me with a small blush. I quickly hurried to the Gryffindor table, taking my usual seat.

“What was that?” Joy nudged me teasingly, lips in a mischievious grin.

“Don’t” I snapped, back to my bad mood. I’m still pissed at Baekhyun. His fangirls won’t let me live. 

“While coming here the Zhang girl stopped me and--”

“Lea Zhang?” Joy asked with her eyebrows raised, “Yixing’s twin sister?”

“Yixing?” My eyebrows furrowed as Joy chuckled, shaking her head.

“Yeah, Lay’s real name...you didn’t think his name was actually Lay?” Joy laughed as I narrowed my eyes at my toast, genuinely thinking Lay was his real name.

“That’s...not important right now!” I exclaimed, looking back at Joy pissed, “Lea stopped me just to ask me about Baekhyun, I swear on Merlin’s name if one more girl comes up to me and--”

“She asked you what?” Joy cut me off bluntly, a sleepy and messy haired Chanyeol making his way towards us.

“I don’t know, Joy” I rolled my eyes, looking around the table. Where is Baekhyun? He was supposed to come with Chanyeol. But once my eyes fell on the other end of the table, they fell on the boy I was looking for. Right, why am I even surprised? Baekhyun won’t even sit with us now that’s he’s always hanging out with his Quidditch teammates.

“How can you not know?” Joy scoffed, returning me to our conversation.

“Morning girls” Chanyeol muttered with his raspy morning voice, sitting a little bit too hard down, knees smacking against the table.

“Morning” Joy quickly said before turning back to me expectantly.

“I stopped her before she could ask me” I shrugged at Joy as she rolled her eyes.

“Where’s Baekhyun?” Chanyeol’s narrowed eyes turned towards us as he stopped mid-bite. Joy sighed, pointing to where I looked a few seconds before, making Chanyeol sigh.

“Why?” Joy snapped, referring to our previous conversation about Lea.

“I swear on Merlin’s beard…” Chanyeol mumbled with a big sigh, “Ever since Baekhyun made it onto the team...he won’t even have breakfast with us anymore. I’m lucky if I get to say goodnight or good morning to him…”

“Suck it up, Chanyeol” Joy snapped, becoming irritated with our giant’s constant interruption of our conversation. Chanyeol pouted as I smiled at him sadly, understanding his pain.

“Before you throw a fit, Joy, I didn’t let Lea ask me anything about Baekhyun because I’m fed up with all the girls constantly asking me about him. What am I? His diary?!” I snapped, throwing my toast angrily back on my plate.

“Well, you could make connections nonetheless--”

“Morning guys” Baekhyun’s melodic voice interrupted our thoughts. Chanyeol’s head whipped up at the speed of lightning as he grinned at Baekhyun with his mouth full of food. I continued staring at my food, still angry at him even though it’s not exactly his fault.

“Morning” Joy greeted him back with a small smile before going back to her opened Charm’s book. I felt movement beside me before a warm breath was blown on my exposed neck.

“You won’t even greet me anymore, love?” Baekhyun’s low voice sent shivers down my neck before I turned towards him.

“Morning, Baekhyun” I greeted back seriously, his lips forming a small pout. I almost scooted away at the close proximity, always feeling a little uncomfortable if he came too close.

“Are you mad at me?” He asked, eyebrows furrowing as he searched my eyes.

“No, of course not” I huffed, shaking my head. A small smile appeared on his lips as he nodded.

“See you in class” I was taken aback when he kissed my temple, leaving me with a strangely quickly beating heart. I swear on Merlin’s name, my body has been acting weird ever since we returned to Hogwarts. But I will forgive him for sitting with me in class.

--

  My good mood came crashing down when I walked into Defense Against the Dark Arts class and saw Baekhyun sitting at the front, at our seats, with a blonde haired girl. The same girl from the party and the same girl who was so interested when Baekhyun was telling his story. Anne Kim. I don’t like her.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm my sudden anger, looking for another seat. How amazing, we had to have this class with Slytherin’s as well...I swear, Merlin wants me dead today. Spotting an empty seat on the left side of the room, the Slytherin’s side, just beside the seat I used to share with Baekhyun, I tried not to stomp down the little path between the desks as I made my way towards the empty seat. I failed in not stomping, however, as heads turned towards me curiously even Baekhyun’s when I slammed my books on the desk a little too harshly. The Slytherin boy looked at me amused while Baekhyun confused, as I took my seat.

“If that isn’t Kang Y/N” The Slytherin boy chuckled beside me, turning his body towards me in his seat.

“Yeah, it’s me” I muttered, jaw clenched as I could still feel Baekhyun’s eyes on me but I refused to look at him.

“Well, I’m sure I haven’t introduced myself properly before but I think you know who I am--”

“Yes, Zhang, I know who you are” I snapped, turning towards the boy who was smirking at me. Lay Zhang or Yixing Zhang, whatever.

“Oh no, calling me Zhang is quite--dangerous” He chuckled as I rolled my eyes, turning back to the front, praying for the professor to enter the classroom already.

“Problems in paradise, darling?” Yixing asked in a sing-song voice making my eyebrows furrow.

“What do you mean?” I asked while glancing at him.

“I hear things had been a little rough with lover boy over there” I followed the direction of Yixing’s head nod, my eyes falling on Baekhyun. I clenched my jaw once again as I saw the blond girl leaning closer to Baekhyun as he laughed at something she probably said...or he said since he’s a narcissistic bitch. 

“Things are just fine, thank you” I said while sniffing aggressively. A cute laugh left Yixing’s lips, attracting unnecessary attention, as he leaned closer to me.

“Is that jealousy I see, Kang?” I bit my lower lip while glaring ahead, stopping myself from answering back.

“Oh it’s something else, perhaps...a little crush on lover boy--”

“I swear on Merlin’s name, Zhang, if you don’t shut it...I will hex you!” I snapped lowly, turning towards Yixing with a hard glare. He laughed again and raised his hands in a surrendering way before turning to the front as if nothing happened. Little crush on Baekhyun? Yeah, right…

--

     Weeks passed, the weather changed into a colder one and soon we were nearing the middle of October. Days at Hogwarts seemed to pass slowly yet they passed quicker than when I was at home in summer vacation. My days were harsher and lonelier. After sitting with Yixing in DADA class Baekhyun seemed to forget about me. At first, I was confused, I tried spending time with him but he always seemed to be busy with Quidditch or some mysterious reason he didn’t want to share with me. Then after a while he stopped talking to me and started avoiding me like I was the plague, I saw him spending more time with the blond girl, Anna Kim. And the final stage that broke me was when he stopped greeting me altogether, acting like I didn’t exist when I was around. It was as if all those years vanished, like we were never friends, to begin with. It hurt me, a lot, because he was the only person I could really rely on. Joy and Chanyeol were amazing friends, but they weren’t Baekhyun. And in my sorrow, trying to get over the loss of an amazing friend, I found myself spending more and more time at the library with a certain Ravenclaw. Junmyeon was friendly, he paid close attention to details, never broke off my sentences, he was calm and waited patiently for me when I was explaining something, he was organized and neat…and the total opposite of Baekhyun. And as Friday was approaching, so was the Hogsmeade trip. I was surprised when Junmyeon asked me out on a date but I didn’t see why I shouldn’t say no, so therefore I agreed.

We were in DADA class, our last for today, and everyone was excited as we were duelling today. We had class with the Hufflepuff’s but our professor teamed up those who he thought were on the same duelling level. I was excitedly waiting in line, the desks and chairs having been pushed to the back of the class for more space, as the professor called out our names.

“Park Chanyeol and Park Chaeyoung” Chanyeol grinned as he walked over to the fellow Hufflepuff girl who sent him a small glare.

“Park Sooyoung--”

“It’s Joy, Professor” Joy cut the professor off rudely, earning a warning glare before he continued.

“Park Sooyoung and Kim Jisoo” Joy and Jisoo grinned at each other, Jisoo being a Gryffindor as well, as they walked over to a spot they chose.

“Byun Baekhyun and Kang Y/N” For a second I thought Baekhyun would be paired with Seulgi, sharing the same surname, but I was surprised to hear my own name. I gulped as Joy and Chanyeol watched me warily walk to the middle of the classroom, Baekhyun’s eyebrows slightly furrowed as he stood across from me. I refused to look at him as I twirled my wand around in my hands, his eyes on me tempting me to send a glare at Baekhyun for his insistence. He really expects me to act all friendly after a whole month of not even speaking to each other? Oh no, I will show him today what he deserves for the way he acted towards me.

“Okay class, I chose two students for today do to a demonstration for us before everyone starts. It was a random choice, I found most interesting I must be honest, so...Miss Kang and Mr. Byun, you may start with a small demonstration” The professor offered us an excited smile and I looked at him with one of mine, just more evil.

“How much time do we have?”

“As long as you take, but not more than ten minutes, please” He smiled delighted at us and I nodded, looking back at Baekhyun with an evil grin. He gulped uneassily, getting his wand out. We bowed at each other, making eye contact as I quickly racked my brain for all the spells that could be used in dueling. 

Before Baekhyun could even open his mouth to throw a spell at me, I was already shouting, “Everte Statum”, Baekhyun being sent flying back as it took him by surprise. The class gasped as I gripped my wand tighter, Baekhyun’s eyes narrowing at me as he raised to his feet, pushing his glasses back.

“Stupefy” But I was expecting it, knowing Baekhyun too well, and I blocked the spell already shouting my own one.

“Aqua Eructo” Water shot out from the tip of my wand, bending to how I controlled it, heading towards Baekhyun quickly but he was quick to dodge the water.

“Incarcerous!” Baekhyun shouted, voice coming out stronger but his form faltered for a second, when my own spell met his halfway.

“Relashio!” I grinned at Baekhyun as he seemed lost, probably forgetting what other spells could be used in duelling. That’s what he gets for avoiding me and not studying with me. I took my chance for a revenge, standing confidently, wand pointed at him.

“Oppugno! Avis!” Green birds were heading towards Baekhyun, attacking him as he tried shielding his head from the sharp beak of my birds.

“Incarcerous!” The birds disappeared as ropes shoot out from my wand, wrapping themselves around Baekhyun’s legs and with a yank, binding his body together. His eyes snapped at me but I wasn’t done yet.

“Stupefy!” He was sent flying back and I watched as he hit the ground with a big thud. The class gasped as Baekhyun groaned loudly, the professor’s mouth opening, but I wasn’t done just yet.

“Expelliarmus!” It was my final and killer spell, Baekhyun’s wand flying from his hand to the ground in front of my feet. I grinned and turned towards the professor who was watching us stunned.

“I believe that was bellow five minutes, professor” I showed a fake smile before walking to the end of the line, the professor clearing his throat.

“Yes, very good, spectacular in fact. I haven’t seen such duel in quite a while...Thirty points to Gryffindor” I smiled as Joy nudged my side, mouthing a ‘I thought you’ll kill him’, making me chuckle. Yes, I did kill something...and that was his pride as we watched Baekhyun get up and snatch his wand with a glare towards me. 

--

  The class took an end and I felt butterflies erupting in my stomach as I thought about my date with Junmyeon approaching quickly. He didn’t tell me where we’d go but I do have an idea, not too fond of it. But as long as we have a good time, the place won’t matter. Making my way out of class, Joy and I laughed as we discussed what I should wear.

“Y/N!” A male voice called out, not as deep as Chanyeol’s. I almost stopped but furrowed my eyebrows and kept on walking.

“Y/N!” Baekhyun called out again, pushing his way through the mass of students as I sped up, Joy walking behind me.

“You won’t speak to him?” Joy asked quietly, making me shake my head.

“I have nothing to speak with him” I snapped, feeling hurt that I had to hurt his pride in order for Baekhyun to speak to me.

“Y/N--”

“Don’t touch me!” I snapped, yanking my arm out of Baekhyun’s grip. His mouth fell open as he gapped at my aggressive response to him, never done something like this before.

“I--”

“I don’t have time right now” I interrupted him with a glare, Baekhyun gulping as he pushed his glasses further up his nose.

“Listen, I just wanted to speak with--”

“I have a date in a few hours, Baekhyun, I have to get ready” I flashed him a fake smile as Joy watched us with furrowed eyebrows, glancing at me uneasily.

“A date?!” Baekhyun gaped, mouth once again falling open.

“What? You thought only you could go on dates?” I chuckled before turning around and walking away with Joy who was furiously whispering about Baekhyun’s weird behavior. That’s no weird behavior, he probably just wanted to tell me how much I hurt his pride and how it’s unacceptable.

--

After getting ready for the trip to Hogsmeade and leaving with the rest of the students, Junmyeon was quick to find me and my hand in his, swinging it back and forth. I giggled at his antics but found it weird. I wasn’t sure about my feelings for him. Sure, he’s handsome and smart and I have a small crush on him...but it doesn’t go beyond that and it concerns me that if I tell him this I will break his heart.

My fears became true when Junmyeon stopped in front of Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop, grinning down at me.

“Are you ready?” He asked with an excited voice and I could muster up a small smile and a hum. Junmyeon pushed open the door for me like a real gentleman, unlike Baekhyun who would have walked in first and wouldn’t have bothered to keep the door for me as well. Once inside, the sight of couples at every table made me a little sick...plus the all pink room. Everything was pink, making me quite uncomfortable, as the tables were round and twinkling bell that signaled a new customer didn’t help either.

“What would you like to drink?” Junmyeon asked with his eyebrows furrowed as he surveyed the place.

“Coffee will be alright” I offered him a smile as he pointed at a pink table more towards to the middle of the room.

“That’s our table, go and sit while I buy our drinks” I nodded quietly and quickly walked to our table, mentally preparing myself for what was to come. First of all, I had to give time for my eyes to adjust to all the pink in this room and pray that I won’t have nightmares of pink. Since there was no long line, Junmyeon was quickly back with our drinks, him having chosen tea.

“Lovely place, isn’t it?” He asked with a grin while sitting down.

“Thank you” I muttered as he handed me my coffee, I took a small sip.

“A little bit too...pink for my liking” I answered as kindly as I could.

“Ah yes, that’s a bit off throwing but the good side is that everyone in here is either a couple or close to become a couple so...you don’t have to be shy about anything” Junmyeon enthusiased about this place more and I could only chuckle, praying we’d leave as soon as we finish our drinks.

“Snogging so openly makes me quite uncomfortable” I muttered, eyes going to the table on our left...then to the table from the window, the one beside it and then the other beside it...I think you get the idea, “Especially when so many are doing it”

Junmyeon laughed at my words as he sipped on his tea, sitting up straighter, “Well, ignorance is bliss...So just try ignoring them”

“It’s not me who ignores people usually” I muttered with a grimace, my thoughts taking me to Baekhyun.

“I know I never asked, mostly because I didn’t want to seem like I was prying, but I haven’t seen you around Byun Baekhyun lately...Anything happened?” Junmyeon asked in a curious, inoffensive manner. I sighed as I placed a hand on the table and started playing with the little spoon placed in a china plate.

“He apparently doesn’t have any time for me anymore, with Quidditch and all...fifteen years of friendship gone to waste, I--” I bit my lower lip, stopping the sudden tears. I never really said it out loud before, refusing to believe such thing...but it is real. Fifteen years of friendship gone to waste because Baekhyun couldn’t put his big pride aside.

“That’s a lot of years” Junmyeon muttered stunned, eyes a little wide, “Well, to be honest, it’s Baekhyun’s loss. Leaving such a beautiful and nice girl like you...I’d never”

I chuckled as I looked away, feeling my cheeks heating up. However, I thankfully controlled my reaction before giving it away, but I wanted to stand up and run away the second I saw Byun Baekhyun and Anna Kim sitting three tables away from us. Anna was sitting closer to Baekhyun, almost on him actually, and Baekhyun was telling a story that seemed to be unfinished as his eyes found mine. I gulped, quickly looking away from them, wishing I never saw them.

“Something wrong?” Junmyeon asked concerned, probably seeing it from my reaction, as he was about to turn around. I quickly leaned over and gripped his hands that were resting on the table and smiled.

“No, nothing, don’t worry” I chuckled, removing my hands from his embarrassed.

“Well then…” He cleared his throat, looking suspicious, “What are your plans for this Christmas?”

“Oh, the same old” I shrugged, playing around with my coffee, “I’m staying here at Hogwarts”

“Really?” Junmyeon exclaimed, face lighting up, “Me too!”

“Oh, I haven’t seen you around in previous years” I said with a smile, eyebrows slightly furrowed.

“Yes, I go home each year but my parents won’t be home this time and I don’t want to spend it with my grandparents, they are horrible” Junmyeon shuddered and I chuckled, “You spend it here always?”

“Yes, my parents work at St. Mungos and their shift won’t end until the third day of Christmas” I explained sadly “So therefore it’s better to stay here with friends rather than leave and be home alone”

“I see” Junmyeon nodded, a thoughtful look crossing his face, “We can spend it together this year!”

“Definitely” I nodded with a grin, sipping on my coffee when there was movement from the table where Baekhyun sat at. Junmyeon just gulped down his tea when Baekhyun and Anna stopped at our table, Anna smiling sickly at me.

“Hey” Baekhyun greeted, eyes falling on me after he sent a glare at Junmyeon.

“Oh hello, I didn’t see you” Junmyeon offered a polite smile at the two students, Anna returning one while Baekhyun ignored him.

“Come on, Baekie, we have to go now” Anna pouted, latching onto Baekhyun’s biceps. I looked at Junmyeon with a raised eyebrow as he contained his laughter.

“Yeah, let’s go” He muttered lowly, sending a glare my way before basically dragging Anna out of the Tea Shop.

“Baekie” Junmyeon repeated, laughter erupting from both of us. Well Baekie, seems like you got yourself some stupid witch.

--

     Time passed and here we were, nearing Christmas quicker than ever. In fact, Christmas was just today. Joy and Chanyeol left three days ago, leaving me alone. Well, not completely alone as Junmyeon would stay and from our dorm Lisa stayed behind too. I spent my time with Lisa usually, going on strolls around the castle if it wasn’t too cold or with Junmyeon in the library reading or outside playing in the snow. Junmyeon and I agreed that even if there was a small attraction between us, we wouldn’t work out, so therefore we became good friends. He was there when I felt alone and I was there when he needed a study buddy. All was going well as we had breakfast in the Great Hall, me deciding to sit at the Ravenclaw table seeing there were few students, the meal being more delicious than ever.

“I could eat this food all day, if only we had this always…” Junmyeon muttered as he eyed his chicken, making me giggle.

“Yeah, they are pretty good but they still don’t top the homemade food” I muttered while sipping from the pumpkin juice.

“My grandma makes the best pancakes!” Junmyeon said quietly, staring at his food as if he was remembering the taste of pancakes. Junmyeon comes from a Muggle family, the reason why he stayed back, he told me later, is because his grandparents aren’t fond of magic and always take his wand away when he spends time with them...and thanks to that, Junmyeon already learned wandless magic, of course not as powerful like with a wand, but just so he could annoy his grandparents.

“I would love to taste those pancakes one day” I muttered dreamily, wondering what they taste like.

“Yes!” Junmyeon nodded eagerly, looking at me with wide eyed “You must come over this summer! Bloody hell, you are a Pureblood, probably not knowing what half of the Muggle things are...imagine my grandparent's frustration with you! Fantastic!” 

I laughed as Junmyeon went on ranting about his grandparents and everything we could do to frustrate them. So it was set, I would visit Junmyeon and his grandparents in the summer vacation, staying over for a week.

--

After breakfast both Junmyeon and I retreated back to our Common Room, Junmyeon wanting to share the news with his grandparents while I wished to read. Of course, we did not forget to gift each other and Junmyeon brought a cute scarf with the Gryffindor colors but with a small Raven in the left corner. I bought him a book he said he didn’t have but wanted to read, called Hamlet from a Shakespeare called man. I should read it too once he finishes it.

The Common Room was quiet and vacant, a rare sight for the Gryffindor Common Room, the one that always held so much chaos. Curled up in front of the fire on the sofa, with the book on my knees, I read quietly, feeling a little lonely. I wish Joy would have stayed with me this year or...I wish Baekhyun and I would be still friends. Then I wouldn’t be sitting here, reading, and bored. 

There were loud thuds of footsteps as someone made their way down the stairs from the boy dormitory. I didn’t bother looking who it was, as I’m not really interested in what’s happening around me. I couldn’t help but look though when the sofa dipped beside me and someone sat, a little too close for my liking. Baekhyun’s anything but innocent eyes were watching me, eyes falling on the book. He stayed quiet as I closed my book and rose to my feet, wanting to leave.

“Merry Christmas!” He said, almost shyly, as I froze. I couldn’t believe my ears. So after months of ignoring my whole existence, he finally speaks to me.

“Seriously, Baekhyun?” I scoffed as I gripped my book tighter, wanting to keep the words back but not succeeding, “After months of ignoring me and avoiding me like I’m the plague...you come and just casually tell me, Merry Christmas?”

Turning to him angrily, I watched as he rose to his feet, hands behind his back, “I know I--”

“You know nothing, Baekhyun!” I exclaimed, all the pent up feelings surfacing, “You started ignoring me out of nowhere, without an explanation! We’ve been friends for fifteen years Baekhyun and then you just break off all contact you have with me? Do you know how that felt?! It felt like someone ripped my heart out and broke it in two and then threw it on the ground and stepped on it thousands of times to make sure it hurt more each time! But you have time to spend time with-with Anna Kim?! That stupid witch who runs after every boy's wand as if they are toys! Is that how much I mattered to you Baekhyun? I can’t believe I wasted my time and feelings on a narcissistic, prideful bitch like you!”

Baekhyun’s eyebrows were furrowed as he stared at the ground, glasses dangerously close to falling off once again. My hand itched to push it back for him but I mentally scolded myself. Get over it, Y/N, you are no longer friends.

“You...called me a bitch?” Baekhyun looked up at me, pushing his glasses back and running a hand through his messy hair.

I scoffed, my glare deepening, “Is that all you heard?”

“No, of course not!” He exclaimed, stepping closer to me, “Listen, I’m very sorry for everything. I know you probably won’t forgive me for another half a year but I need to tell you for once. I was caught up with Quidditch, I really was. I barely had time to study because I was pushing myself to become better, you know my dream is to become a Seeker. I have to do everything I can to become noticed by big teams. I barely had time for myself let alone for you! And Chanyeol, didn’t he tell you the messages I kept sending through him?”

My eyebrows furrowed as I took a moment to think, “No, he never told me anything”

“That stupid giant” Baekhyun rolled his eyes, looking pleadingly back at me, “I swear on Merlin’s beard! I asked him daily to update you about what was happening with me! I thought you started ignoring me because--because I wasn’t a good friend to you anymore! It had me worried and then Anna started showing up everywhere and she wouldn’t leave me alone for a second. She followed me even to the men’s bathroom! And I promised to go on a date with her if she left me alone after...but that date turned into more and now she thinks we are dating…”

“But you are not?” I asked curiously, hopeful.

“What? No! Of course not!” Baekhyun shook his head with a shudder. I sighed, biting my lip as I continued looking at him. I missed this idiot so much.

“I forgive you just--please don’t ignore me from now on. Even if you are busy, make time to tell me ‘Oh hey, Y/N, I’m probably dying but don’t worry, see you tomorrow at breakfast’, okay?” A grin broke on Baekhyun’s lips as he nodded quickly.

“I will sit with you from now on at meals...the boys from the team are quite lame and idiots” Baekhyun said with a shrug and I rolled my eyes.

“Of course, no one can be like Byun Baekhyun” Baekhyun started grinning before I killed his joy, “Not even himself”

“Here” He handed me a small gift box, revealing his hands from behind his back. My mouth fell open as I took the present, having bought nothing for him.

“Oh, but I--I bought nothing for you” I muttered embarrassed, not expecting to restore our friendship. Baekhyun grinned before leaning close enough to make me uncomfortable.

“Don’t worry” He muttered before closing his eyes and pressing his lips against mine. My eyes widened at the motion, never expecting it from Baekhyun. But my heart started beating faster and the butterflies in my stomach were stronger than with Junmyeon. The kiss was fast and more like a peck as Baekhyun pulled back with a prideful grin.

“It’s enough gift if you don’t slap me” He said cheekily, making me chuckle.

“Don’t tempt me, Byun Baekhyun” I warned him as I started slowly opening the gift box. 

Yes, Byun Baekhyun, don’t tempt me to kiss you again.

--

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 10.07.17 lb

from now on, expect the lb to be published around this time. coz i fully have to take a 2 hour nap to prepare myself for these one hour episodes. lord, they better be worth it! GIVE ME MY BROTP MOMENTS (obros, bhaujai/bulbul, aniRuKara, ShivRi) AND I’LL TOLERATE ANYTHING!!!!!! 

ok let’s doooooooo this! *cracking knuckles*

plain text version here. 

it would have been nice if you’d informed RAGINI of this decision of yours... 😗😗😗

interesting how he just keeps saying ENGAGEMENT, and nothing about what usually follows an engagement... 😐😐😐

lmao oh man i just can’t stop laughing at ragini’s reaction. she’s seriously likeeee BISH WHUT IS EVEN HAPPENING? IS THIS A PRANK SHOW? IS CYRUS BROACHA GONNA COME OUT AND YELL BAKRAAAAAA AT ME? 😟😟😟

lololololololol everyyyyyyyy woman shivaay decides to marry has the same reaction: “.... shit. 😬😬😬” 

saved by the belllllllllll.... yas girl, you go out on your date! 😙😙😙

lmao his face. fucking idiot. what did he think, she’d instantly collapse and run into his arms at this stunt of his? 🙄🙄🙄

shivaay is having some seeeeeeeerious buyer’s remorse right now. ragini is one item that the return policy is going to prove to be veryyyyyyy tough for. 🙃🙃🙃

pinky does not know how to read the room. at all. 😑😑😑

shakti/jhanvi and (surprisingly) bhavya’s silent rage tho. 😯😯😯

shakti is trying to dad, but beta is too out of it. 😔😔😔

i think ragini is already regretting this whole thing. lmao, we all have those crushes which are way better in our head, coz the reality could never live up to it. this is one of them. she just liked looking at his kanji eyes!!!!!!!!! and now she has to deal with the whole crazy khaandaan that comes with him. 😆😆😆

anikaaaa, baby. no cryyyyyyyyyyyyy. 😪😪😪

LMAO “PYAAAR”, anika’s brain is like 0 - 200 in 3 seconds. 🙄🙄🙄

haan bas ring ko dekhta reh. fucking idiot. 😒😒😒

ok yeah, i like ragini too now. poor, hilarious, slightly off her rocker but in a kooky way, ragini. 😊😊😊

i’m glad they made ragini more likable. i hate hating on female characters. hating pinky itself is exhausting. 😖😖😖

ooooooooooh, GHARWAALI V/S BAAHARWAALI. 😧😧😧

don’t underestimate our girl here. she’s not your “typical housewife”. 😏😏😏

oh anika... why the “tum jaisi ladki” nonsense???? you don’t even know her. she might end up to be a good one, in the end. like tia did. 😌😌😌

ooooooh snap! point ragini! 😯😯😯

lol ragini is going all tia-ish on shivaay with “destiny” and shiz. 😕😕😕

ooooop. sapnaaaaaaaa meraaaaaaa toooooot gayaaaaaa. 😥😥😥

thank god this hot mess of a man did the right thing FOR ONCE and cleared it up though. not that it’s going to be of any use. coz ragini is gonna make sure this gets out into the press and becomes a big thing and shivaay’s going to be dragged into this kicking and screaming. 😬😬😬

quickkkkkkkk recovery. impressive, girl! veryyyyy impressive! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

she’s never going to wash that shoulder again. 😆😆😆

anika, why are you still in the damn house? go for your date, idiot. like at least go out and pretend to be on it. so that he burnsssss in his agony for a few hours. 😈😈😈

ouff again kamra and ghar waale issues. why don’t you just pee around the room to mark your territory, you idiots? pfffffffft. 🙄🙄🙄

daaaaaaaamn, anika not in the mood to take ANY shit. basically told him to go fuck himself. i can feel my skin instantly clearing up at her sass. 😇😇😇

OMG ANIKA. YOU ON FIRE. KILL HIM, SIS. FUCKING SLIT HIS THROAT AND DRINK HIS BLOOD! 😈😈😈

“bataane ki zaroorat nahi hai, mujhe pehle se hi sab kuch pata hai.”

because he’s been stalking you, idiot girl. get the hint. 😚😚😚

TOO MUCH FARAQ-ING, NOT ENOUGH FUCKING. THAT’S YOUR PROBLEM KIDS. JUST HAVE SEX ALREADY. 😒😒😒

“achcha? aap move on ho chuke hai? ab MOVE OUT bhi ho jaaiye.” 

*actually, physically throws him out of his own fucking room* 

OMFG YOUGAIZ, I THOUGHT I WAS IN LOVE WITH ANIKA BEFORE, BUT NOW I KNOW THAT WHAT I USED TO FEEL FOR HER ARE LITTLE BABY FEELINGS OF LIKE. WHAT I’M FEELING RIGHT NOW, THIS IS WHAT LOVE IS. JESUS CHRIST, WHAT A GIRL. WHAT A FUCKING GIRL. AN ICON. A GODDESS. I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M WITNESSING THIS WITH MY OWN TWO EYES IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD TWO THOUSAND AND SEVENTEEN. #BLESSED 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

aw man, his hurt face. but also his disbelief that she actually fucking threw him out of his own fucking room. i’m just sitting here making weird, inhuman, half-laughing, half-crying snuffly noises. 😭😭😭😭😭

gauri kumari sharma, trying to escape this actual hellhole once again... but... 😕😕😕

what horrible dubbing. horrible horrible dubbing. it sounds like kunal is talking from fucking underwater. 😑😑😑

“aur agar main kahoon mat jao? RUK JAO?”

“KYUN?” 

yaaaaaaaaas, askkkk him, queen. QUESTION HIM. 😌😌😌

yehhhhhhhhh pakdaaaaaaa. 😍😍😍

why does she have a large... tinsel, rakhi type thing hanging from her kangans? 🤔🤔🤔

“MUJHE MERI GALTIYON KA EHSAAS HO GAYA HAI. I’M SORRY.”

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS. 😭😭😭😭😭

gauri, my queen. my perfect, beautiful, flawless queen. 👸🏽👸🏽👸🏽

RETURN OF OLD, CALM, SORTED, RATIONAL OMKARA. 😯😯😯😭😭😭🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

haha awwwwwww gauri. 😘😘😘

“yeh MERA ghar hai???” lmaooooooooo oh omki. you adorable fucking pupppyyyyy. 💗💗💗

oh ho, i’m so not interested in rudra’s plot with bhavya. like, i love rudra, and i can tolerate bhavya in the bg reacting to things, but as a couple, ughhhhhhhhh. 😫😫😫

lmao typicalllll rudra move. remember when sumo kept trying to tell him about romi, and he just wouldn’t listen, and then he blamed her for not telling him???? stupid boy. 🙄🙄🙄

“sarvGUN sampoorn bahuuuuu”, lollllll. 😂😂😂

the weird dramatic music so doesn’t go with the comic nature of the scene? 🤔🤔🤔

why does he keep saying “COP” like it’s a dirty word?? 😕😕😕

i mean, cops are fucking dirty... but still... 😐😐😐

ouffffffffffffff, emoshunnnnnnnnnnn. 😫😫😫

whatever, i still feel NOTHING for these two. 🙄🙄🙄

haaaaaaaye, my three fucking idiots, all together. 👶🏽👶🏽👶🏽 aankhein taras gayii thiiiiii. 

snorttttttttt “SHUT UP RUDRA!!!!!!!!” before he even saiddd anything. 😂😂😂

oh yeah, and you being an asshole had ABSOOOOOOLUTELY nothing to do with getting thrown out, eh? 😆😆😆

YAAAAAAAAAAS BHAUJAAAI VENTING TO BULBUL!!!! 😚😚😚 (and bhavya, but lbr who cares about her?) 

lmaoooo, anika’s thesis on FARAQ (and steamrolling all over poor gauri.) 😂😂😂

oh yeh lo, idhar yeh bhi lecture de raha hai on the topic du jour. 🙄🙄🙄

dimaag ho, toh nikaal sakte the. you seem to be sharing one dimaag between the three of you. imbeciles. 😒😒😒

bhauuuujaiiiii and bulbulllllllll are sharinggggg vocabularyyyyyyy!!!!!! I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍

so, established that rudra’s birthday is 10th july. he’s a cancerian. 

funny, i’d have pegged om to be the cancerian. oh well. 😗😗😗

EW WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS “LAUNDE HAI KAMAAL KE” THING NOW???? I’D JUST GOTTEN USED TO DIL BOLE OBEROI AFTER ONE WHOLE FUCKING YEAR AND YOU FUCKERS GO AND SPRING THIS NEW MICHMICHI WAALA SLOGAN ON ME? THE FUCKKKK. 😫😫😫😫😫😫😫

naaaaaariiiii sssssakti jindaaabaaaaaad! 👯🏽👯🏽👯🏽

god i love gauri so much. she’s too fucking cute to be real. 😚😚😚

lmaooooooo everyone got messages, but NEITHER GROUP INVITED PINKY. FUCKING BESTTTTTTTT. 😆😆😆

damnnnn, jhanvi looks so fucking amazing. 😯😯😯

my godddddddddd, pinky, way to make even THIS about you. victim complex mein post-doctoral kar rakha hai pinky ne. 😣😣😣

“party kam, PARTITION zyaada lag raha hai mujhe.”

snort. tej made a funnnnyyyy. 😆😆😆

ok not laughing at your jokes, you fucking wife burner. 😒😒😒 

(headcanon: advay singh raizada took arson lessons from tej.) 

ouff do i have to watch this stupid cheesy cake nonsense? really? i’m already tireddddddd. 😖😖😖

23. we finally have an age for rudra. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

and how old is bhavya supposed to be again? 🤔🤔🤔

WHY IS THE BIRTHDAY BOY WEARING CLOTHES THAT HAVE BEEN EATEN BY RATS????????? 😐😐😐

also, ouff, such old fashioned birthday song. we have newer options (+more rudra-appropriate), you know? 😊😊😊

*hissing* “rudra, yahaaan aa. 2 v/s 3 ho raha hai, and it’s not fair!”

businessman of the year, and grownass adult, shivaay singh oberoi, everyone!!!! (fuckinggggggg petty idiot.) 😂😂😂😂

awww the girls got rudyyyy a “peeeroteen jyaada aur meetha kam” cake! 💖💖💖

oh boy, om had a hand in making the cake too? *looks at it warily* 😬😬😬

“haan gaana koi bhi gaa sakta hai.... lekin sun sab nahi sakte na... aur khaas kar aap gaaye toh...” hahahahaha 😂😂😂

gauri patting anika’s arm to console her. ughhhhhhh. i love these two together sooooooooo much. 😍😍😍

pft, om ab tum KHOON AUR KHAANDAAN ke baare mein shuru mat ho jaana. 😒😒😒

“WHAT’S GOING ONNNNNNN?” tej is me. i am tej. 

... what’s wrong with that cake? just the icing is a little messed up. why would you still not eat it???? ugh, rich ppl. 😑😑😑

lollllllll rudraaaaa, dhokebaaaaaaaz, dil bole oberoi, kamaal launde whatever my assss. cake khaane ke liye bhool gaya bhaichaara. 😆😆😆

OK SHIVAAY, I’VE TOLERATED A LOT OF YOUR BS, BUT CAKE MUTILATION???????? A WHOLE NEW LOW FOR YOU, FUCKER. A WHOLEEEEEEEEE NEW LOW. 😡😡😡

lol omRu’s faces at this totally extra alpha male garbage. 😂😂😂

the devranis are vaguely uncomfortable with shivaay’s suggestive frosting licking, looking straight at anika. 😆😆😆

anika: “BHAVYA!!!!!!!!!! INHE ARREST KARO! ABHI KE ABHI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” bhavya: *equally mad* “HUM TOH KAR LETE! LEKIN INDIAN PENAL CODE MEIN CAKE KA KHOON KARNE KI KOI SAZAA HI NAHI HAI, KAMBAKHT!!!!!!!”

lmaoooooooooooooooooo 😂😂😂😂

neither of the cakes was this colour or consistency? yeh teesra cake kahaan se? HOW MANY CAKES DID YOU ASSHOLES DESTROY TO SHOOT THIS FUCKING SCENE????? THERE ARE PEOPLE SUFFERING IN THIS WORLD (ME), CAKE-LESS! 😫😫😫

“jeeee baaaaaaaaaaat bhaujaaaaaaaai! bahut bol rahe the bade bhaiyya!” 

lmao oh bulbul. tumse yeh umeed nahi thi! yours was the brOTP i placed about allllll others in this houseeee. 😌😌😌

billu, if you had the slightest bit of sense in your head, you’d pull a holi reprise and smear her back all sexy and shit. but you dumb as fuckkkkkkkkk, so..... 😒😒😒

ok he’s still maarofying chance and feeling her face up all sexily. good. not aaaaaaaas dumb as he looks. 😎😎😎

OMG SMUG KISSY FACE. 😧😧😧

lol anika’s ‘fuckkkk off and die’ face at it, though. 😂😂😂

bulbul decided why should bhaujaiiii have all the fun? 😊😊

haha, cake wali holi. omg whyyyyyyyyyyyyy is she so fucking cuteeeeee? 😍😍😍

pinky and tej be like *maya sarabhai voice* GOD, THIS IS SO MIDDLE CLASS! 😆😆😆

i like that bhavya’s (seems to be???) stronger/better than rudra. 😊😊😊

lmao omg she was fully going to kick his ass if om hadn’t intervened. 😂😂😂

jungleeeee bachche toh hamesha se the. bas, this is the healthiest way this has manifested in this show ever. 😐😐😐

ok fwding this buddhon ka nonsense. don’t care. 🙄🙄🙄

pinky feeling ostracized. i don’t feel sorry for her at all though. 😑😑😑

ouff, ok, we get it. happyyyy happppy happppppppy. fwding. ⏩⏩⏩

i am happiest for om-gauriiiiiiii, who look so genuinely happy and like they’re having funnnnnnnn. aw. my babies. 💖💖💖💖 *smooshes them* 

ooooooooooh. OOOOOOOOOOOOH. BILLU IS QUITE POSSESSIVELY AND HAQ SE MAKING A MOVE ON ANIKA. 😯😯😯

LICK THE CAKE OFF EACH OTHER, YOU IDIOTS. YOU KNOW YOU FUCKING WANT TO. 😏😏😏

i quite like this dimming lights effect in o jaana moments, to signify that the world outside the two of them ceases to exist for each other. 😌😌😌

lo aaa gayi, cake mein haddi. 😶😶😶

no wonder shivaay and gauri love each other so much. both are EXTRA AF. 🙃🙃🙃

“apni apni waali ko uthaao, aur kamre mein leke jaao!” 

dadi be progressive (and kinky) as fuckkkkkkkk. 😯😯😯

haaaaaaaaaye. my boyssssss. and their girlsssssss. 😍😍😍 

ugh, and bhavya. 🙄🙄🙄

WHAT EVEN IS THIS FAMILY?????????? 😟😟😟

pfffffffft, bewakoof toh tum teeno ho. awwal number ke. premium grade. best in the country. 🙄🙄🙄

“tum log humaara WOH bana rahe ho.” “papppu?” “haan, same thing.” *muttering* “banaaye hue ko aur kitna banana?” 

anika’s snark is what powers me through life. 🙃🙃🙃

ooooop. things got super serious super suddenly. 😶😶😶

pfffffffft, coordinated and choreographed moving. totalllllly natural and human like. 🙄🙄🙄

eeeeeeeeeee, faraqqqqqqqq games continueeeee tomorrrrrow. wet billu’s getting alll up and sexyyyyyyyyy on my girl. 😏😏😏 

[rowdyprofessor]

Saat Soch: IPKKND3 Episode 11

Previous

Here there be spoilers!!

1. Is a five-year-old editing this?

And they just discovered screen splitting?

[later]

2. Advay touched his sassur-ji’s feet :)

I expected that Advay would flashback to this room belonging to him or his parents. I loved this shot:

Rude™️.

3. Junoo0o0oon, tere ishq ka 🎵

Advay: “Galti Chandni ki hai. Maine usse kai baar kaha, ki main khazane ke darwaze nahi khulne doonga, par voh nahi maani. Bachpan se ziddi hai. Agar uske paas zid hai, toh mere paas junoon hai. Aur zid ko junoon se haarna hi padta hai.”    [The fault is Chandni’s. I told her so many times that I wouldn’t let the door to the treasure open but she didn’t listen. She has been persistent since childhood. But if she has persistence, then I have obsession. And persistence must lose to obsession.]

4. Better late than never

Chandni got there in the end. I mean, she’s barking up the wrong tree but at least she’s trying to figure him out.

Did Murli walk right past Chandni in the corridor (or whatever lies beyond those doors) without seeing/recognising her?

Haha, she’s not too impressed by Messy Singh Raizada’s living standards. Who leaves teabags on the floor, honestly. Yuck. (Why doesn’t Murli clean up? Too busy chasing girls at gol-gappe stands?)

Oh yes wow, Mr Editor. I wouldn’t have remembered that her photo is behind that red curtain unless you blinked the shots like that. Thank you.

Khushi hiding in the wardrobe was so much cuter.

5. Chemistry

HE PAUSED AND SMILED OMFG. AND THE SMILE as she blew the hair out of her face. He’s enjoying this! Eeee they’re angry-flirting. PSSSHHH. 

*tries not to find it adorable* *fails miserably*

Oh don’t play Rabba Ve here you heathens, look at what’s he’s DOING!! Such romance, many wow :(

What!? Don’t break away from them NOW, it was getting interesting. There was something in his eyes.

6. I wanna kill Veer.

The Veer-Shikha thing was so pointless. It wasn’t even funny! 

7. They’re hurrying along the romantic track, aren’t they?

He still likes her!! He’s a totally different person today to the guy we met in the first three episodes. They couldn't sustain Advay’s darkness for ten episodes. I guess the Dussehra promo still hasn’t come to fruition so he still has at least one trick up his sleeve, but I wasn’t expecting such a quick transformation. It’s harder for Dev to forget Chandni than Advay anticipated.

Me @ Advay: You really are filthy, bitwa. Ew.

I high-key love this Rabba Ve instrumental. This Rabba Ve moment looks genuine, unlike the forced ones from earlier.

*insert a Chandni/Advay is thirsty joke here*

“Baazi jeetne ke liye saamne wale ko nahi, uski soch ko harana padta hai. Chandni ko laga ki dood mein zeher tha, iss liye usne yeh dekha hi nahin ki maine uske Baba se aashivaad lene ke bahaane kya kiya. Jung ladi maidan mein jaati hai, par haar jeet yahan hoti hai. Aur yeh jung sirf Advay SIngh Raizada jeete ga.”    [You don’t defeat the player, you defeat their way of thinking. Chandni thought that the milk was poisoned, so she couldn’t see what I did under the pretext of taking blessings from her father. Contests might be held in arenas, but winning and losing occurs in the mind. And only Advay Singh Raizada will win this contest.]

Precap: Ouch. Ouch ouch ouch. Oh, he’s BUYING the house. Nice. *continues printing Advay-weds-Chandni cards* I still think they’re getting married soon!

Theories:

1) Marriage is still on the cards.

2) Chandni sleeps in Dev’s room.

3) By the end of episode 20 Advay will have fully transitioned from villain to romantic hero. All of the angst and abuse but none of the murderous intentions!

4) I think they’ll have a lot of romantic chemistry, when the time comes. I just don’t want that time to be now. I want it to be like ... 100 episodes from now. 

Will I continue?

Ummm yes?

Next

[literaryclubiiti]

Growling Shriek(s)

DISCLAIMER: This is an admittedly light-hearted conversation about the trends of our most beloved IIT Indore between two not entirely happy-go-lucky stalwarts about to graduate. Following the tradition, this can be considered as a whole-hearted, but nonetheless well-intentioned rant. Reader discretion is highly advised.

By Amey Ambade and Ashish Bharatwal

(SCENE 1: SILVER MESS)

(It’s about noon on a Saturday in March. Amey is sitting on the wildly recognizable red chair, steel plate on the beige table, as ‘Tip Tip Barsa Pani’ plays loudly on the TV, almost in sync with the water dripping off the water filter behind him. He dons a grin as Ashish joins him, visibly frustrated.)

Amey: Dude, what’s up with your mess refund?

Ashish: Motherfuckers. They should be drowned in their own broth.

(Murderous glances from judgemental postgrads across the table)

Amey (unconcerned) : Hard luck, eh? What did you expect, though? Four years on, they’d understand why you dislike them? Didn’t you get to fill a pointless form to get something out of it?

Ashish: It’s not the first time I am getting the short end of the stick in IITI.

Amey: Not the first time you’ve said that.

Ashish (smiling) : Not the first time you’ve said that. You tend to be able to predict each other’s moves after this long a swim in the shitpool as comrades.

(Random Mess Guy comes up: ‘Bhiyaa, mess fees pay kar di na?’ They look at him disapprovingly, and taking the hint, he promptly disappears.)

Amey (doubtfully breaking a piece off a roti with bare hands) : Amen to that, brother. Chal, aaj khane mein kaunsi insect species ki discovery hogi dekhte hain. Talking of insect species, what’s up with E-Blockers suddenly hitting the gym?

Ashish: Well, whaddya know? Trying their best to feel good about themselves before leaving; what were they even doing the last four years, haha!

Amey: Ah well. You know and I know. Now that everyone else is in Simrol, I don’t know what eyeballs you speak of. I give the fad a month to drop off. We clearly couldn’t give two shits.

Ashish (chuckling with disgust) : Especially now.BTW, speaking of shits, look at this - Lauki Ke Kofte. BC’s trademarked turd-sized dumplings® are turning out to be a favorite of those who haunt the Jain food counter. Tatti khaaye par pyaaz na khaaye.  

Amey (proud to not have made the unfortunate sabzi choice) : Chuck that, chal Fresco chalte hain, Snickers pe fir se PayTM cashback aaya hai.

Ashish: Yeah, I have to get a couple of photocopies too. These B-schools! Why do they even have CAT if that is just meant to be a ‘Fuck you!’ to mediocrity?

(They leave the mess, their untouched food-laden plates still on the table. The freshness outside is liberating, it’s like getting out of a green fart convention.)

Amey (finally inhaling air) : Perceived mediocrity… Thodi toh political correctness chahiye, bhai. But yes, I agree. I’ve been swamped with my MS applications lately, and they are equally exhausting. Thinking about our lives after graduation is perhaps more frustrating than trying to maintain a straight face when Batra talks. Add to that the lifelong terror that we will take away from boarding harmfully yellow buses, and lo, you have the recipe for a migraine.

(They reach Fresco, and scan through the hastily placed products. Amey discreetly picks up a Zandu Balm)

Ashish: Remember when as freshmen we were singing at the top of our lungs the lewd version of ‘Chahun Main Ya Na’ and didn’t give two shits when we noticed a furious Batra peering over us ominously from the half-open door? Ah, I miss those careless times.

Amey: And the countless number of times we partied with complete disregard for the neighbors or Digant? It helped that we had no immediate neighbors, aur guards to apne jigri thhey. But with no authorities to piss off now that everyone except us is thankfully in Simrol, it’s like, hum kiske dimag ko shot de ab?

(They’ve collectively picked up stuff worth 150 bucks but will pay only a hundred because subsidy.)

Ashish (showing his phone screen) : Hey, look at this article in ToI: Fluxus event winners haven’t received their prize money. This one guy says IITI owes him fucking 10k. Much ado about Fluxus every year. The only ones happy are the OCs, until last year, right? From what goes around in the campus, they reported earnings of 3000 from Sunidhi’s concert, and an attendance of 3000 in the media. What an absolute load of crap?! 70 lakh mein toh teen decent Fluxus ho jaayenge BC.

(They’re walking, surrounded by the white buildings with eerily jail-like black railings that have defined their time in Silver Springs. Now that Silver isn’t infested with overexcited juniors, final years are loitering in the quaint streets.)

Amey: I still stand by my idea to only have an e-Fluxus to save the money and the Kejru-level shaming.

Ashish: Haha, if only you knew e-Fluxus actually happened this year. We had a middling singer Shirley Setia adorning the terrains of Simrol. I also heard Aditi Agrawal was their second choice, now that she has her own YouTube channel. Way to go!

(They get to the lift, sharing it with the classically unconcerned 4th floor wali aunty as they hear the dulcet voice on loop, touting “Please. Close. The Door. Krupaya. Darwaza. Band. Karein.” Somewhere, Hodor’s soul is shedding a single heavenly tear.)

Amey: The terrains of Simrol! There’s some places in our new campus that look like scenes from True Grit, Blazing Saddles and Mad Max were filmed there. I could swear the dust twisters could effectively upend an unsuspecting Simmi and Avnish holding three Cormens each. Avnish will probably be ecstatic about that, too.

Ashish: It’s miraculous how so few cases of asthma have popped up given the dust bowl Simrol is and the number of students cooped up in there. We are a resilient lot, I must say.  

(They get out of the lift on the famous 3rd floor and enter D-314.)

(SCENE 2: ROOM)

Amey: We’re wasting an entire sunny afternoon for my bloody transcripts. ( He pauses to check a news notification on the antics of a certain orange unhinged toddler-psychopath.) You have to agree, though, with all the negatives aside, isn’t it actually pretty convenient to navigate around the half-built pods in pyjamas?

(They change in a minute, time is important here, and Amey reaches for his shoes. There’s no way he’s going into the arid Wild West in flip-flops. Ashish checks the bus schedule on his phone. They have bus schedules, for fuck’s sake, doesn’t that say a lot by itself?)

Ashish: Yes, but that doesn’t outweigh having no good food, good booze and good company in a ten-kilometer radius, does it? Taste Butts? Screw you, Rohan Rathore.

Amey (disapprovingly) : No cash, only college Smart Cards accepted. And you have to try the infamous Chicken Fried Rice. Nothing screams appetizing as half-cooked rice with boiled chicken bits and spring onions sprinkled on top to emphasize the near non-existent efforts that went into serving it. Maybe if our batch was shifted to the forsaken place too, we wouldn’t have had such a pessimistic opinion. Maybe angoor khatte hain.

(Both take a minute to check if they haven’t forgotten their ID cards and proceed to exit the building. ID cards hold more importance in the Simrol campus than platinum credit cards.)

Ashish: But then I wouldn’t have been able to go to TIME for classes twice a day at ungainly hours. (Phone pings) Iss Utkarsh Kumar Singh ko chayn nahin hai. And then there’s the IIT Indore Discussions and Complaints and Grievances and Suggestions and Repercussions and Discombobulations and Fornications page. People have no chill, this Gymkhana has no chill. Which is a good thing, actually. This one tried its best to make things right. The Constitution was a pretty good move.

Amey: Yeah, they tried to right some wrongs. Avadhesh is hands-down the most proactive Gymkhana President I have seen, especially in regard to being responsive. Can’t say the same about the vigilants-in-their-own-right juniors who were more concerned about lengthening the mail threads with their bull than making their contribution count. The juniors really get on my nerves sometimes.

Ashish: Sometimes? Hah. What have the Quiz and Literary Clubs been up to? I count one… two… three… Three events in the last year, both our clubs combined - no aggressive, only passive, these runts. I’m pretty sure we left the clubs on high notes, but the future for these exclusive groups of students seemingly aspiring just for PoRs is obscure at best. The clubs are almost decrepit now, but the enthusiasm to forward mails from other institutes’ fests has not dwindled a bit.

Amey: Our work defined these clubs, but I agree, lately, confusion seems to have taken them to a standstill.

(They board the dangerously yellow bus after a 10-mile walk)

(SCENE 3: FREAKISHLY YELLOW BUS)

(Amey proceeds to sit on the right side of the bus. Arey naive child.)

Ashish: Bhai, uss taraf dhoop aayegi.  

(They sit on the double-seat and share a headphone. Ashish bangs ‘Another Day of Sun’)

Ashish: I can listen to the ‘La La Land’ soundtrack on end. This and Abusive Aunty Mix and Chodu Singham...  Did you know they caught a third guy for downloading umpteen gigs of porn @36MBps in Simrol?

Amey: Kya?! Yeh kaise hua bhai? That poor pervert.

Ashish: The IT guys can obviously track you in the new hostels. The surprising thing here is, they cared enough. They ALWAYS care when it comes to the quotidian aspects of student life gone slightly haywire. Khaane mein keede se koi problem nahin hai, par Frooti ka payment overdue hai toh expulsion.

Amey: Well, if one guy hogs the whole network, others have to come jumping like it’s The Dawn of The Rise of The Dusk of The War for the Planet of The Apes. I remember how we used to go bat-shit crazy when someone was downloading the latest episode of Game of Thrones from our gareeb 80GB limited Airtel networks when we already had it. Some people were so goddamn serious about the bandwidth they’d become whinier than a Goth kid trying to find his eyeliner.

(The bus hasn’t started yet. CultSec boards. Bus revvs.)

Ashish: Here comes our poor sacrificial lamb. He should wear a tee that says, ‘I am Kalash and I am not a terrorist’.

Amey: Sir, I have known him since my first day at IIT Indore even though that is technically impossible, but impossible is just a word at IIT Indore and apparently everyone had such a good rapport with him so they decided to keep him 22 km away. <insert GRE words image here>

(Both chuckle and greet Kalash, who proceeds to sit behind them.)

Amey (checking phone) : Naya email. Best BTP submissions ke liye. Alag hi! BTP awards are farcical. No interdisciplinary uniformity in grading or evaluation. Two submissions from Mech and both got some prize or the other at the Symposium because of their presentation.

Ashish: Or just plain luck. Still, man. Our BTPs saw some real effort. Our many advisors deservedly became Associate Professors. It was high time, wasn’t it?

Amey: My faith in the IITI academic system is still maintained thanks to these hardworking guys. You remember how hard they had to fight to get us great courses for a Minor degree?

Ashish: The Minor program was unarguably the best decision that defined the academic policies for our batch. And the future batches too.

Amey: Personally, I’d love to see a core subject Minor for the new batches. And Abhishek Sir is the best DoSA we have had since Granny’s left Silver Springs. He’s doing a commendable job, especially given all the student shenanigans.  

Ashish: I think you discount the students’ role tad too much. Our batch has some of the best coders in the country. Utkarsh and the Shah bros are going to the ACM-ICPC World Finals, hopefully turning it into an institute tradition. Then we have prodigies like Tripathi. These guys have done a lot to promote the coding culture at IITI, if only by setting examples. Look at the placements and internship trends you and I noticed this year at the PO: we are near the top of the ladder in India as far as CS is concerned. But more focus on other branches would not do harm, would it *rant intensifies*? 

...Look at the abysmal performance by Electrical and Mechanical; for a decent salary we non-CS guys either have to learn programming and leave our core studies for the night before the exams, or go into research, or take GATE or CAT or IES or IAS or KLPDS and what-not! While we as students need to grow balls and learn how to not get swayed away by first CTCs, some push from the institute would be great.  

(Amey isn’t listening. Notwithstanding the growls and *shaking* of the bus, Amey is cozily napping.)

(The bus stops at the campus main gate after what seems like the whole length of ‘Jodha Akbar’ and ‘What’s Your Rashee?’ combined.)

Entry Gate Security Guard: Sir, ID card. (Ashish has been pretending to sleep too because guard overlook karne ki probability 80% hai and as accent-torn Deepika Padukone in xXx quotably says: he likes his odds.)

(These adamant seniors are not giving up)

Entry Gate Security Guard: ( unable to cut the bullshit, nudges Ashish) Ser! (shudder) ID.

(reluctantly pulling out his ID, Ashish mumbles under his breath.)

(The insidious dust has broken Amey’s sweet nap. He coughs as the scarily yellow bus proceeds into the vastness of the campus.)

Amey: Look, kids with donation boxes for used clothes. AVANA has consistently been on a roll. Although the sight of someone silently looming over you as you sleep, whispering ‘Thatty Rupes’ is almost as scary as the time we watched The Descent and shit ourselves simultaneously crying and laughing.

Ashish: ( in an impressive Marathi accent) Nepali Vachli bhau. Nepali Vachli. (Both share an inside joke as the bus comes to a halt. Destination reached.)

(SCENE 4: SIMROL)

Amey: ( getting down) In the end, that’s what matters. Although persisting regionalism is a good talking point for students, with all its pros and cons.

Ashish: Closely-knit antelope herds are not easy to penetrate.

Amey: Is that the first time you’ve said that? (another chuckle shared, this is getting cheesy) I don’t even remember why we came here. Oh yes. Transcripts.

(A friendly junior smiles and greets them. In contrast to the shade thrown in Simrol, cordiality is still burgeoning here.)

Amey: There are perhaps no stronger polar opposites than AVANA and SESC. I might be horribly wrong, but from what we’ve noticed, it seems like SESC has become redundant and unproductive. The startups they have been promoting either sold stationery or just took the MHRD grant for pizzas, getting bundled up in a matter of months.

(They approach the Physics Pod complete with cinderblocks to cranes and the evergreen sounds of metal hammering. )

Ashish: Yeh bik gayi hai SESC. Ab is SESC mein kuch nahin hai. Yeh saare milke humko pagal bana rahe hain m--

(Ashish stops abruptly as Professor Vishvakarma passes by, greeting them briefly.)

Amey: This guy is THE man. Our Placement Office and the IAC would never be as well-established without him. What’s up with IAC this year?

Ashish: Santosh Sir worked selflessly for both Placements and the Conclaves. Never will the student members be as happy and well-fed as we were under his rule. Haan, this year’s IAC is going to be a mish-mash effort by Rajveer - all hot air and no real content. Ah, who cares? It is anyway under a different professor now.

Amey: But you must admit, PKU sir has been a worthy successor to SKV. The Placement Office is working as a well-oiled machine thanks to him. Won’t you miss our Placement Office perks?

Ashish: Do you mean the divine morning coffees, occasional mayo sandwiches and sour-ass lemon teas or the long hours of highly productive meetings and equally unproductive bakchodi? We’ll definitely miss both.

(They get to the new Academic Office. Ashish listens to the incoherent dialogue between Amey and Rinki Ma’am, and watches her give Amey his precious transcripts.)

Amey (whispering) : Tapesh sir and Rinki ma’am have really grown on us fourth-years, haven’t they?

Ashish (whispering back) : Yeah. I used to get a cold shoulder earlier. Last time I was offered tea. I guess they understand how being seniors is difficult and that our problems begin to get more genuine as we grow through the college. Familiarity here bred sympathy, instead of contempt.

(Cut to: One hour later they leave from SS in an Uber to the city as the dangerously catchy

Swachh Bharat jingle is being heard everywhere. Pity the driver of those poor garbage trucks, people. You can only listen to so much of Kailash Kher and the Chorus Kids. Hey, Kailash Kher and the Chorus Kids sounds like a decent band name.)

(SCENE 5: INDORE CITY)

Ashish: Yahaan Johnny ke paas rok dena, bhaiya.

(They get out of the Nano and pay using PayTM because demonetization. The driver is conveniently named Ramesh. He frowns over not having received cash. Bitches.)

Amey: Where our fuckbois at?

Ashish: Dugar and Bapat are at Sam’s (free) Momos, they tell me. Diggi, Govil, Dhaivat and Avnish are having Fire Paan. Prajwal is at Nafees for biryani. Damn! His attraction to biryani is borderline sexual!  

Amey: Can you blame him? It is magnificent. Though not as magnificent as the one we had at the notorious Love Palace party. Our juniors will never experience the thrill of gatecrashing a wealthy Punjabi’s lavish food fiestas.

Ashish: That was quite a fiasco! The Curious Case of Love Palace! The slaps, the drunken brawls, the humiliation, and, in the midst of it all, the most delicious meal we have ever had, owing in large part to its absolutely undeserving our shorts, slippers and hoodies.

(For our unwitting readers, on 24th February 2014, allstudent received a mail inviting us to the housewarming celebrations of an ostentatiously built residence, the Love Palace that falls on our way to the Axis Bank ATM in Silver Springs. We turned up in full strength, especially the first years who were early to arrive and plunder and leave. Our super-seniors flocked to the open bar, exhausting it of its offerings within an hour. As it turns out, the mail was a hoax perpetrated by *insert_mysterious_name_here* and we were actually not invited. The hosts were gonna have none of that shit. What followed was some lit slapping and thrashing game from our truly Punjabi hosts, which effectively ceased all the faggotry in mere minutes. Amey and Ashish obviously escaped unscathed because they were dressed decently, which was a camouflage. The Bhatias, in the week that followed, saw the wrath of the slap-ees in the form of broken car windows and some dope graffiti. Some of the first-years got their long-overdue slaps well in advance, though.

This event was perhaps one of the most happening ones at IITI, even more than a few Fluxuses. Or is it Fluxii?)

(As they gobble up a hotdog each, they see their homies approaching and a shitstorm of banter follows)

If you’ve manage to read all of the rant above, you can flatten as you go up. The writers want you to know that despite all its flaws, IIT Indore is actually a pretty good place to be, and they cherish their years here. Ashish (rather suspiciously) knows the roll numbers and names of all the people here, and Amey knows how to ignore them. The best hostels in any IIT system, the united outcry that we so often witness (*cough* mess *cough*), a filial feeling that comes with the perk of having a small student population, and the shared respect for friends, professors, and everyone else around, definitely make our IIT Indore journey memorable.

(BONUS)

director@iiti.ac.in  : Wish you all a great life ahead, Batch of 2013–17!

lenka@iiti.ac.in : And I

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz lbs: 4th + 5th may

suchhhh bad acting by the qaidis. lord, why can’t this show get better extras? 😐😐😐

pft. shivaay singh oberoi just DANCED around drunk on magic berries with a bigger gun than that. try harder, qaidis. 🙄🙄🙄

lmao, shuru ho gayi apni madam. 😋😋😋

HAHAHAHA AMAR PREM 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

“naam sunte hai pata chala tha tum filmy aur awaara kism ke ladke ho, but no! tum toh nikkame aur nithalle bhi ho.” 😂😂😂

lol shivaay’s reaction to her ENERGY. 😂😂😂

OMG JUST WHEN I THINK I CAN’T LOVE ANIKA MORE, SHE QUOTES ANDAZ APNA APNA. FUCK ME SIDEWAYS, I WOULD DIE FOR THIS GIRL. I WOULD. MOVE OVER SHIVAAY. NO ONE CAN LOVE HER MORE THAN ME. 😭😭😭

this is exaaaaaaaaactly how i react when ppl tell me they haven’t seen andaz apna apna. 😧😧😧

jesus i feel like gul & co. are stalking me. *looks around suspiciously*

these qaidis need to get a grip with the bad acting. 😕😕😕

shivaay is so undeserving of my queen. can she leave his unappreciative ass and marry me? ours shall be a happy, andaz apna apna quote filled union. 👭🏽👭🏽👭🏽

why are the qaidis holding hands? are they lovers, ‘i love you philip morris’ style? 🤔🤔🤔

also i swear i’ve seen the moochi waala qaidi somewhere before. 😐😐😐

lmaooooooooo shivaay’s faceeee when she keeps talking. 😂😂😂

lol, the moochi waala qaidi is thissss close to losing it. i guess you need to be exposed to anika for a really long time to build up resistence the way shivaay has. 😋😋😋

whattttt kinda stupidass police doesn’t know what the faraar qaidi look like? 😒😒😒

i really think the qaidi are lovers. look how affectionately that one is sehlaofying the other one’s knee. 😙😙😙

who died and made anika the leading expert on tyres? 🙄🙄🙄

lol, sach mein aaj bohut bakbak kar rahi hai. i think she MIGHT still be high on berry juice. 😂😂😂

lo. aur police. 😐😐😐

finally. someone knows what INDIA’S LEADING BUSINESSMAN looks like. 😒😒😒

BIWI BIWI BIWI BIWI. man is unstoppable. i think he’s just glad someone’s married to his annoying ass.  😂😂😂

aaaaaaaaand moochi waala qaidi’s lost his temper finally. 😝😝😝

OUFF, SHIVAAY. YOU’RE THE BIGGEST IDIOT. I THINK THIS IS PROOF HE’S A BONAFIDE OBEROI, COZ SUCH DUMBASSERY IS 100% OBEROI GENES. 😑😑😑 

lol anika talking about her hair routine featuring mehendi reminds me of the scene where she offers omkaara shikakai and reetha waala shampoo as thanks for clearing her name of the chip waala accusation. 😂😂😂

why the fuck hasn’t shivaay noticed that the policeman is out cold???? 😒😒😒

CODEWORD BHI NAHI SMAJHTA, BEWAKOOF!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😤😤😤

“lagta hai bhabiji ko antakshari khelni hai.” lmao 😂😂😂

haha shivaay’s fake laugh. 😂😂😂

oh god, please don’t make HIM sing. 🙉🙉🙉

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG SHIVAAY’S GETTING MAD THAT ANIKA’S SINGING DURING HIS TURN. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

shivaay singh oberoi, antakshari enthusiast. who knew. 😇😇😇

… i’m so surprised shivaay even knows how to play antakshari. it’s such a LS game as far as he’s concerned. 🤔🤔🤔

LMAO LOOK AT HIM ENJOYING ‘GOLI MAAR BHEJEEEE MEIN’ AS IF IT’S SOME CLASSICAL RAAG 😂😂😂😂

oh godddddddddddddd now he’s even singing along to oye oye. this fucking idiot. 😂😂😂

FUCKINGGGGGG FINALLLLLLLLLYYYYYYY! 

LOL WHY IS HE STILLL SINGINGGGG ALONNNNNGGG???? 😂😂😂

could youuuuu people run a little FURTHER, and not just stop at the first thing you found???????? idiots. 😒😒

“tum theek ho?” awwww 😭😭😭😭

lmaooo “haan par US WAQT ka code word tha na!” pffffffft. typical husband wala excuse. 🙄🙄🙄

“TOH ACHCHI QUALITY KA BRAIN KHAREEDNA CHAHIYE THA NA!!!!!” HAHAHAHAHAHAHA 😂😂😂😂😂

he doesn’t know what oootpataang means??? it’s a normal word though?? 😐😐😐

I TOLD YOU FUCKERS TO RUN FURTHERRRRRRRRRRR 😩😩😩

qaidis are taking full opportunity to fucking ACT the fuck out of the 3 minutes given to them. 😒😒😒

shivaay, you know she’s not gonna leave your stupid ass, as much as you deserve it. it’s her one fatal flaw. 😑😑😑

pffffffft, so only you can talk crap about how much she talks eh? 🙄🙄🙄

lmaooooooo anika and her thermocol ka stone. 😂😂😂

qaidi 2 ki actingggggggg. amazing. 

headcanon: patidev was finding anika all types of sexy and advancing to kiss the crap outta her when that stupid qaidi interrupted. 😠😠😠

is this the time to pick a fight, shivaay? kissss her! 😚😚😚

i feel like my liveblogs these days should just be a bullet point after bullet point screaming “kiss her!!!!!!!!!!!” and nothing more. 😐😐😐

please, is that why you stood in front of a gun, ready to take a bullet with her name on it FOR THE SECOND FUCKING TIME???? 🙄🙄🙄

this is an equal opportunity bullet-taking relationship, asshole. you better accept that and get used to it, mister. 😑😑😑

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO THEM SCREAMING SHUT UP AT THE QAIDI. AND HIM ACTUALLY PUTTING HIS FINGER ON HIS LIPS. 😂😂😂😂

she’s right. it is yourrrrr fault, shivaay. your nosy NKK enquiring ass is to fault! 😒😒😒

“haddi-tod bhi” LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO 😂😂😂

I SWEAR TO GOD IF THIS KANJI EYED MOTHERFUCKER GETS HIMSELF SHOT AGAIN, IMMA RESURRECT HIS DEAD ASS AND KILL HIM ALL OVER AGAIN MYSELF. AND IT’LL BE PAINFUL AND FUCKING SLOW. FUCKING HELL. 😡😡😡

5th may

lmaoooooo wait, they’re really named AMAR PREM? hahahahahaha 😂😂😂

shivaay’s sideeye at the qaidis while watching them argue. 😂😂😂

“mere koooo kyunnn maaara????” - said in the same voice and tone as “tere ko kisneee maaara????????” from gunda 😂😂😂

anika’s turn to stand in front now. #feminism 💁🏽💁🏽💁🏽

oh mooch wale qaidi. that was a mistake. you made SSO angry. you won’t like him when he’s angry. 😬😬😬

“BIIIIIIIIIIWIIIIII HAI MERIIIIIIIIIII! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY GIRLS RAN OUT ON MY ASS ON MY WEDDING DAY???? YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT WAS TO GET HER TO MARRY ME? AND TO KEEP HER MARRIED TO ME ON A DAILY BASIS? IT’S FUCKING HARD. DON’T YOU FUCKING BE SHOOTING AT THE ONLY WOMAN ON GOD’S GREEN EARTH WHO CAN TOLERATE ME!!!!!!!!”

lol nakuul having to stand on his tippy toes to match the qaidi’s height. 😂😂😂

why’s he pointing the gun towards himself tho? such a fucking idiot. 😒😒😒

pfffffffffft, i already know the qaidi’s the one who’s getting shot. awaaiiiii ka drama. 🙄🙄🙄

looks like policeman finallly fucking woke up from his mini coma. 😐😐😐

also, god, so overdramatic, mooch waale qaidi. bas haath pe hi toh laga hai. that’s like a rudra level graaaaaaze. ask these two how a gunshot to the fucking chest feels. 😒😒😒

yaaaaaaaaaaas, you hug the crap outta your husband girl. 😊😊😊

and since he’s not taking the initiative, maybe YOU kiss him. it’s 2017, girls can do that now. 🙆🏽🙆🏽🙆🏽

coz she loves your dumb ass, you dumbass. 😒😒😒

ouff. you two. less fighting. more makeout-ing. 🙄🙄🙄

oh ho, ghoom phir ke back to NKK. 😑😑😑

btw, is this all happening in front of the chor-police? like… you two should maybe take this behind that wall. 😕😕😕

aw. he’s trying. 😭😭😭

i know he is, but… come on man, you’re a grownass adult. you gotta learn how to control your impulses. you can’t just do whatever the fuck you “want”. i WANT to quit my job and just stay in bed, braless all day. i WANT to never eat another healthy meal again and just subsist on potato chips and popcorn for the rest of my life. can i do that? NO. COZ THAT’S WHAT BEING A GODDAMN ADULT IS ABOUT. YOU CONTROL YOUR IMPULSES AND DO THE RIGHT THING. 😒😒😒

aaaah, finally she said it. 😭😭😭

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

also, crying. my boy’s grown up. he’s SO grown up. waaaaaah. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

amazing what some rottenass alcoholic berries and having a gun pointed in your face can do! they’ve given this man the self awareness he’s been lacking for 33 fucking years. 😐😐😐

ok, did he stay up all night reading some relationship therapy book or what? he’s talking classic counselling language. 🤔🤔🤔

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh, they love each other sooooo muchhhhhhhhhh. and iiiiiiiii love them soooooooo muchhhhhhhhhhh. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

COULD YOU FUCKERS AT LEAST FUCKING KISS NOW?!!? 😩😩😩

GODDAMNIT POLICE OFFICER!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY WERE GONNA KISS! THEY ALREADY HAVE A BROTHER WHO DOES GHATIYA INOPPORTUNATELY TIMED SHAYARI BACK HOME. NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO YOUR STUPIDASS FUCKING SHER. 😡😡😡

also, where did the second policeman come from?? 

GO HOME AND SEXXXXXXXX NOW!!!!!!!!!!! 👉🏽👌🏽👉🏽👌🏽👉🏽👌🏽

walk, you spoilt braaaatttt! 🙄🙄🙄

CHAMPA!!!!!!!!! 😇😇😇

lmaooooo anika’s wonderstruck look at her ownnnn hands. such fucking cute. i love her so much. 💖💖💖💖💖💖

lmaoooooo “zindagi bharrrr yeh sunna hoga” suchhhhh a typical husband. 😂😂😂

lol tumhare paas jet THAAA. it crashed, remember? 😋😋😋

LMAO SHE’S SOOOOO ME. SUCHHHH A PATRONIZING SMUGASS BITCHHHHHH. 😂😂😂

awwww look how nervous he is. 😊😊😊

HELLO CHAMPU! 😂😂😂 

she just SHOVED him offffff lmaooooo 😂😂😂😂

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HE’S COVERING HIS FACE!!!!!!!!! 😂😂😂

“dono” haha awwwwwwwwww 😙😙😙

“is baare mein kisi ko bataana mat.” 

omgggggggg this adorable fuckerrrrr. 💘💘💘💘

“pair theek se aa rahe hai?“ 

kyun nahi aayenge? utniiiii height toh hai nahi iski. 😋😋😋

lollllllllllllllllllll he doesn’t know what to do with his handsssssssss. 😂😂😂

why the random flashbacks to the #shitia party? 🤔🤔🤔

ouffffff, back to this hellhole. can’t my babies just stayyyyy in the foresttttttttt? 😫😫😫

lmaoooooooo look at him saunter in coooooolllly in the bg. 😆😆😆

UGH. CALM DOWN MUMMEH. HE’S BACK NOW. 🙄🙄🙄

and fuck your passive aggressiveness. 😑😑😑

shivaay’s silent but slightly annoyed “I’M A GROWNASS ADULT” face is my permanant face at my mom. 😐😐😐

mummeh doesn’t appreciate being dismissed like that. 😬😬😬

nor does she appreciate him being a GOOD FUCKING HUSBAND. THERE IS NOTHING I FUCKING HATE MORE THAN THIS DESI CONCEPT OF “JORU KA GHULAM”. IT’S CALLED BEING A CONSIDERATE, LOVING HUSBAND. MAJAAAAAL HAI KI THE PATRIARCHY LET A MAN BE DEMONSTRABLY AFFECTIONATE AND CARING TOWARDS HIS GODDAMN WIFE. 👿👿👿👿

i’ve said it once, i’ll say it again: fuck you very much pinky. please die, thanks. 👹👹👹☠☠☠

god what nonsense. looks like gauri’s bullshit #pativrataness is spreading via air to anika. ugh. LET HIM TOUCH YOUR GODDAMN FEET IF THAT’S WHAT HE WANTS. 😒😒

goddddddd pinkyyyyyyyyyy, LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!!!!!! BHOOT KE TARAH MANDARAAA RAHI HAI HAMESHA. 😑😑😑

and he said he doesn’t wanna do the damn pooja. DROP IT, MUMMEH! 😠😠😠

yeah, whatever. good luck trying. now leave. 🙄🙄🙄

“khud ko change karne ki koshish kar raha hoon. mere liye tumhara naam khoon khaandaan TUMSE IMPORTANT NAHI HAI.“ 

excuse me. it’s raining on my face. 😭😭😭

… ”HUMAAAAAAARE LIYE”. SAY IT! SAY IT! 🙃🙃🙃

HAAAAAAAA, HE SAID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😂😂😂

“ek dusre ke liye goli khaa sakte hai… toh mom ki gaali khaa hi sakte hai.“ 

lol idk about you shivaay, but i’d rather khaaofy goli rather than mom ki gaali, coz desi moms and their daant is waaaay more emotionally traumatic. 😫😫😫

also, waaaaaaaaaaaaah, i loveeeee himmmmmmmmmm. 😭😭😭

OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT MAHI VE CONFIRMED TO BE SHIVAAY KA BHAI 😱😱😱

today’s lb will be put up like… waaaaaay later. :) 

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 02.05.17 lb

god, this girl is stillllllll on this like a dog behind its tail. GIRL. COME ON. GIVE IT UP. FOCUS ON BONING YOUR HUSBAND. 😑😑😑

… doesn’t he have ENOUGH brothers??? like, three so far (yes, i’m including sahil) ek aur bhai ka kya achaar daalega? 😒😒😒

meanwhile this asshole here is also on his own mission, AFTER breaking all of rudra’s possessions and saying he had no haq to find out about anika’s background when she herself doesn’t care. 😤😤😤

poor rudra. bhaiyya better cut him a blank cheque to replace all that shit. 😑😑😑

sahil’s still here! 😊😊😊

oh ho, yeh toh jr. rudra nikla. iske pet mein bhi kuch nahi rehta. 🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️ 

shivaay ne iske pet mein already jo itna kuch bhar rakha hai. 😂😂😂

lol, shivaay obliviously walking into the lion’s den. 😋😋😋

“mere jaane ke baad aapka happy birthday hone waala hai” *throat slashing gestures* hahahaha 😂😂😂

LMAO SHIVAAY COMPLETING THE SONG WITH “YOU WERE BORN IN THE ZOO”  😂😂😂😂😂😂

33. may i remind you all, the man is turning 33. 😛😛😛

… she’s looking for a glass of water, isn’t she? 😬😬😬

LMAO KNEW IT. 😂😂😂

aaaaaaaand she’s off. 🙉🙉🙉

an artist’s representation of what’s happening: 

yeah, this doesn’t look good for you shivaay. you should have just asked her. 😶😶😶

“aap koi jasoos chakran hai? ya dusron ke ghar mein jhaankne waali aunty hai? ya daily soap ki buaji hai?” 😂😂😂

lol where’s chantumaiiii coming from? she didn’t even say the word rn? 🤔🤔🤔

LMAO THAT’S SOOOOOOOOO NOT WHAT YOU DO SHIVAAY. YOU GO ON FIRST IMPRESSIONS AND WITH ZERO THINKING AND A NEGATIVE AMOUNT OF ANALYSIS. 🙄🙄🙄

“garam aaloo” lolololol literal translation for “hot potato” 😆😆😆

oooooh yeah, ask him girl! 😐😐😐

like, i’m really NOT on #teamAnika for this matter because she’s being the worst kind of hypocrite right now, but i just want (her) to get answers to these questions!!!!!! 😗😗😗

god, i’m her. i hate when people leave mid-conversation and i will fucking hunt your ass down if you do it to me. 😡😡😡

champa ko kya dahej mein laayi thi??? how did she magically arrange the scooter fast enough to catch up to him? 🤔🤔🤔

god the shitty graphics, are you fucking kidding me???? 😖😖😖

DIDN’T HE LEARN HIS FUCKING LESSON ABOUT LOOKING AT HIS FUCKING PHONE THE FIRST TIME HE ALMOST RAN HER OVER????????? JESUS SHIVAAY. 🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

maybe this is why prinku so readily believed that clip of shivaay running over someone that ranveer sent her. coz she knows shivaay’s always on his fucking phone while driving. 😒😒😒

how the fuck even did she…??? 😧😧😧

you know what, forget it. 🤐🤐🤐

ohhhh boy. tadibaaz v/s tadibaaz. 😣😣😣

lol, this is SUCHHHHHHHH a #married fight. 😂😂😂

omg she’s soooo me. god, she’s (i’m) a nightttttmare!!!!!! 🙈🙈🙈

lmaooooooo her approving of his gaadi waala jhagda idea. 😂😂😂

‘i certainly don’t like you right now, but i don’t want you to be thrown through the windshield in case of an accident.’

#trueLau 😊😊😊

lol who do you think you’re kidding, anika? he has eyes. 🙄🙄🙄

AUR KITNA KHEENCHOGE US BECHAARE BELT KO??? 😑😑😑

oh but don’t let me stop you from putting your face within kissing distance! 💏💏💏

… what about the fucking scooter??? 😐😐😐

OMGGGGGGGG I JUST REALIZED HOW MUCH I MISSED THEIR CAR SCENES AND WISHED THEY’D COME BACK! EEEEEEEE! THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO ME, ISHQBAAZ GODS! 😇😇😇

lol this “song on radio magically reflects situation” trope is soooo fucking cheesy. 😌😌😌

haha, she got in a shot at his horrible singing! 😂😂😂

lmaoooooo shivaay reassuring HIMSELF that he’s a “pretty good singer” 😂😂😂

oh baby boo, you’re pretty good at a lot of things, but singing isn’t one of them. just… let it be. 😌😌😌

“tel kitna khayegi? average kitna degi?” lololol 😂😂😂

girl, let him “ride” you first. #dirtyJokeOfTheDay 😏😏😏

girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl, isse itna kuch suna rahi ho. it’s gonna look realllllllllly bad when he finds out what you’ve been up to. just shush. 🤐🤐🤐

oh boy. they’re gonna have wished they didn’t miss that faraar qaidi wala news bulletin. 😗😗😗

lmao, she got in a shot at his hypochondria as well. 😂😂😂

i think she’s a scorpio. she’s fighting veryyyy dirty, just like we scorpios tend to do. 🦂🦂🦂

“i wish yeh chopper hota! main neeche kood jaata!”

haha awwwww. 😅😅😅

oh no. 😬😬😬

“kisne kaha tha gaadi mein jhagda kar lete hai???” “toh kya sadak ke beecho beech jhagda karta main?????” “ABHI KYA KAR RAHE HAI??? SADAK KE BEECHO BEECH HI TOH JHAGDA HO RAHA HAI!”

lolllllllllll you guyssssssssssss. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

oh man. you two really need to have sex and just fuck all this frustration away. #tellywoodTrashKiTharkiAdvice 😌😌😌

of course. anika. at least CHECK what the liquid isssssssss! honestly!  🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

ouff the jankyassssss graphics. so stupiddddd. 😒😒😒

lol she’s bringing back the fightttttttttttttt. 😂😂😂😂

“nuksaan ki wajah information nahi, tum ho, tum.” 

awwwwwww, come on. don’t be mean to herrrrrrrrr. 😌😌😌

BIWI BIWI BIWI BIWI BIWI BIWI. yes we get it she’s your wife and you’re madly in love with her and you can’t stop saying the word biwi now. 😚😚😚

lolllllllllll shivaay ke andar tia ghus gayi kya? universe waali baatein kar raha hai. will anika pick uppp on it? 🙃🙃🙃

LMAOOOOOOOO OMGGGGG SHE DID HAHAHAHA 😂😂😂😂😂

i fucking loveeeeeee anika’s glassy eyed, monotone tia impression. 😂😂😂 

50 km door? abbe oh. mumbai se panvel is only 40 something km. 😕😕😕

“hawwwwwww, anika tum kitni laparvaah ho!”

hee hee heeeeee, snarky singh oberoiiiiiii. i love!!! 😍😍😍😍😍

oufffffff, whyyyyyyy this shitty last scene with pinky’s nonsense, i was enjoying this episode sooooo much so far. 😒😒😒

who dis scary ghungroo ghost? 👻👻👻

awww, looks like the fight is over! 😚😚😚

goddamnit, if they weren’t high on whatever berries those were, THEY’D HAVE TOTALLY BANGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😩😩😩

i normally don’t like musical sequences like these, but they’re being goofy and cute af in this one. honestly #marriageGoals 😍😍😍

hope the scene ends with them cutely falling asleep while snuggling! 😚😚😚

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 13.03.17 lb

happy holi, all! 💜💙💚💛💗❤ may your day and lives be as colourful as anika’s vocabulary! 

he chose her over “family”... or rather, she’s his family now. i can’t, i just can’t. 😭😭😭

i’m not used to shivaay being so nice. like... SO NICE? surpassing omkara levels of niceness????? it’s making me feel all weepy and shit. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

“BIWI ke aankh mein aansoon bardaasht nahi kar sakta...” 

pft, this boy and his starting trouble with certain words. ab sorry aur thank you ke saath “BIWI” ka bhi jharna phoont gaya hai. 😏😏😏

i love how everyone else is just forced to stand around and watch, while these two are reaffirming their marital status to each other and just... talking about how to deal with daksh... and how he doesn’t like to watch her cry... aage she’ll ask “raat ko khaane mein kya chahiye? tinde ki sabzi chalegi?” and he’ll be like “what’s a tinda?” and she’ll be like “tinda pata nahi aapko? arre, TIN - DA! tinda! 😏😏😏” and the press will be forced to write about this tomorrow. 😐😐😐

breaking news: shivaay singh oberoi confirms anika is wife. also, he doesn’t know what tinda is. 

LMAOOOOOOOO DAKSH IS ALL OF US BITTER SINGLE PPL. LIKE “UGH. GTFO HERE WITH YOUR PDA. GROSS. I HOPE YOU ALL DIE. 😒😒😒” 

there IS a best husband award, daksh . it’s called “best pati” at the star parivaar awards. keep up, idiot. 🙄🙄🙄

loooooooooooooooooool shivaay’s bitch plz face. 😂😂😂

lolllll, i love how daksh thinks something he just photoshopped up in his spare time is enough for the press to print as NEWS. what a fucking idiot. 😂😂😂

*most bored look ever* “jo karna hai kar. [...] mera waqt zaaya mat kar. come on. do it.”

holy shit. shivaay’s never been more badass in his life. 😍😍😍

lol, shivaay really took my advice about the network jammers from last week’s lb. good for you, kid. listen to me more. i can make your life 300% easier. 😎😎😎

oh daksh. give up already. honestly. kyun awaiii maar khaani hai? 😗😗😗

LMAOOOOOO WAIT, DID SHIVAAY KICK HIM? LOLOLOL. 😂😂😂

ok shivaay, maybe don’t scream the words “i will kill you” out in front of the press????? 😬😬😬

ouff kameeni, stop wrecking our fun. i wanna see shivaay beat the tar outta douchey dakshhhhhhh. 😑😑😑

YEH PADAAAAAA. 👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽

lmao tej’s reaction. like “sure. after all that’s happened in the last 10 minutes, why not this too? 😕😕😕”

“bohut drama ho gaya.” 

words i never thought i’d hear in THIS show. please have ranveer present at EVERY family event to break it up after 10 minutes. 😯😯😯

OMG SOMEONE PLEASE SEND RANVEER OVER TO DBO, WHERE THE DRAMA IS REACHING UNBEARABLE HEIGHTS. PLEASE. I CAN’T HANDLE IT ANYMORE. 😩😩😩

“sudharne ka chance diya tha.” 

lmao matlab daksh ka routine chutiyapa hai yeh. 😂😂😂

oh so ranveer just happened to have his police staff on standby? and what crime is daksh even being arrested for? for just being an asshole? arre, tab toh all the men in this show should be in jail with daksh. ALL of them. 🙄🙄🙄

97% sure this is all ranveer ka drama to look good in front of the oberois/shivaay. hmph. 😑😑😑

“anika...” *subtlest head nod ever, indicating her to GIVE IT HER ALL*

need me a freak like this. who pakdofies misogynist assholes and brings them to me for the ass whupping they deserve. 😚😚😚

LMAOOOOOOOOO YEHHHHHH PADAAAAAAAAAAAA. 👋🏽👋🏽👋🏽👋🏽👋🏽

tej: sure. why not. 😕😕😕

“biwi” count of the day: 3. 

oufff ohhhhhhhhhh, bohut ho gaya, leke jao yaar. who the fuck wants his maafi. it’s not like he means it anyway. 🙄🙄🙄

lmao, so basically the press had to stand here and witness all this fuckery, and now they can’t even report on it. best. what a good use of their time. they could have used it to shoot the bachchans’ holi celebrations next door instead. 🙃🙃🙃

“biwi” count: 4. 

yeah ok kids, stop eye fucking in public. the press has already gotten more than an eyeful into your highly dysfunctional marriage. 😶😶😶

“chalengi, MRS. ANIKA SHIVAAY SINGH OBEROI?” 

look at who’s determined to prove daksh wrong and win the “best pati” award. 😋😋😋

OMG LMAO ANIKA BE LIKE “FUCK THE PATRIARCHY!!!! THERE AIN’T EVER BEEN A MAN’S NAME AFTER MY NAME, AND THERE NEVER WILL, BIIIIIIIIITCH! 😑😑😑” 

biwi count: 5. no wait, 6. no wait, 7.  

the man is truly unstoppable now. 😐😐😐

ugh get a fucking room, you two. you’re so gross. 😒😒😒

yes. very single. very bitter. bite me. 😤😤😤

MY FAVVVVVV BLACK SHIRTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!! haaaaaaaaaye. happy mondayyyy to me. 😍😍😍

that sari looks.... weird. why is the pallu so oddly pleated? 😬😬😬

anika’s brain: "oh pati, you’re so fine, you’re so fine, you blow my mind, hey pati! hey hey! 😍😍😍”

lmao yeah reaaaaaaaal smoooth, girl. 😂😂😂

her damn dil ki ghanti is just unstoppable now, isn’t it? 🔔🔔🔔

ha!!!!!!!!! i knew they’d bring it back! 😆😆😆

“aisa lagta hai jaise shivaay meri galli ke shararti bachche, baar baar ghanti bajaake bhaag rahe hai!” 

haha awwwww. 😊😊😊

girl you really need to learn how to check out ppl more subtly. 😐😐😐

patidev, could you just fucking put that fucking newspaper down and do mauke pe chauka? 😒😒😒

LMAOOOOOO his weird smile. like an android trying to be human.  

lol howwww is he even doing that with his face? 😧😧😧

lo, pehle HE couldn’t say biwi, now SHE can’t say BIWI. someone send these two to fucking speech therapy. 🙄🙄🙄

OMFG THIS COCKY BASTARD. 😯😯😯

he’s right though. he’s right. BUT OMFG. SUCH COCKY. 😑😑😑

aw man, she suddenly got all senti. oh my heart. 😥😥😥

btw, at this point i’ve been watching this episode for over an hour and a half now. i keep pausing because i can’t handle all the damn feels. I STILL HAVE FIVE MORE MINUTES TO GO. AM I EVER GOING TO FINISH AT THIS RATE???????? 😫😫😫

girl, just tell him you love him. 😐😐😐

OMFG SHE DID. i mean... basically. I DIDN’T EXPECT HER TO, THOUGH. JESUS CHRIST I NEED TO LIE DOWN. 😱😱😱

I’M NEVER GOING TO FINISH THIS DAMN LIVEBLOG. 😣😣😣

“aw.” 

OMFG. THIS FUCKER!!!!!!!!!! 😟😟😟 

KILL HIM. KILLLLLLLLLLLL HIM. 😡😡😡🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪

“yeh jo english bolne waali hifi ladkiyaan hoti hai, woh pyaare doggies ko dekh kar aise hi awaaz nikaalti hai!” 

LMAO. 😂😂😂

ALSO, YES, GO AWFFFFF GIRL. FUCKING KILL HIM. 😤😤😤

lol poor omRu also got dragged into this. 😂😂😂

well, ru and kunal’s body double did. 😐😐😐

lmao meanwhile shivaay’s STILL aww-ing in the background there! 😂😂😂 what a fucking idiot! 

lollllll rudra got in a chulbul waala taana @ om. 😂😂😂

abbe oh, “aw” ka tuition class chal raha hai kya? 😒😒😒

god, this man is fucking impossible. if i was anika, i’d try smothering him to death with my pillow that night. 😠😠😠

“anika ko bilkul pata nahi chalna chahiye!”

snort, biwi kya bol diya, typical husband waale nakhre shuru. 🙄🙄🙄

pft, yeah good luck with getting a sorry out of her. i’d like to see you try. 😗😗😗

OMFG 🚨RED ALERT 🚨 RED ALERT🚨 SHE HAS A GLASS OF WATER IN HER HAND!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙃🙃🙃

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS!!!!!!!! 😂😂😂

say “aw” again, shivaay. 😂😂😂 LOL SAY “AW”, BITCH! 😈😈😈

i am rudra, rudra is me. looking at anika with allllllll the admiration in the world. 😍😍😍

anika: i think rudra and saumya’s story is incomplete.  shivaay’s brain: “OMFG SHIT, SAUMYA. THE GIRL I SAID I’D BRING BACK. SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT. I’D FORGOTTEN SHE EVER EXISTED. 😧😧😧”