#had to replace it. it's great though i love that thang

[softgrungeprophet]

i just wanted to draw a dumb boy with his ass out 😔 stupid faulty wiring...

[mintys-playarea]

RUGGIE B. W A DUNCE! PLAYING! LOVER!

You had no idea how you were able to get a man such as him to fall in love with you. He was clever, sweet, a great cook, and an absolute cutie... Ruggie was yours and you were his!

You had many flaws. You weren't very smart, you had tendencies to mess with people... The list could go on. Yet he still loved you.

It was a cool, autumn day. Warm colored leaves fell from trees, leaving the courtyard a blend of reds, browns and oranges. There were plenty students walking and talking happily along with one another, the smell of pumpkin spice wafting in the air. Though you were relatively uninterested before... A particular student has caught your eyes. It was none other than the Azul Ashengrotto walking around, promoting his most recent sale for the Mostro Lounge... This was the perfect opportunity.

The leaves crunched beneath your shoes as you tapped his leg, your icy cold hands sneaking up his pant leg and touching his warm calf. He shivered with a loud yelp, immediately turning around to find no one there. You were hiding behind a nearby tree. You weren't hidden well of course, but Azul couldn't see you. He shook his head, sighing and brushing it off as the wind. As he continued to promote the sale, you snuck up on him again. You tapped his leg the same way as before, except... You weren't fast enough this time. He kicked you and hoisted you up with stern eyes.

"Do you understand how disrespectful you are?!" Azul screeched. He clearly disliked getting his legs touched like that.

You sputtered trying to come up with an excuse, panicking as you see the Leech twins starting to come into view. You squirmed as Azul held still and started walking.

"Excuse me boys, but may you help hand out flyers for me as i return this rascal to their owner? They were very disrupting to me, we wouldn't want that happening with to another," Azul had a slight pout as he continued walking. He muttered something to himself quietly before going into the Savannaclaw mirror.

Leona sighed as he saw Azul waltz up to him. "And how am i responsible for the herbivore??" He said with a tired look.

"Well, aren't they always over here? I'd assume it's because they have something with you?" Azul responded, almost annoyed with the fact he had to speak with Leona.

"No... You'd have to find Ruggie. He's— Right here," Leona groaned before returning to his room.

"Oh, hey there Az! Whatcha doin' here? And why do ya got lovebug there?" Ruggie commented on you being carried by Azul like a critter he finds dirty.

"I found.. er.. Lovebug messing with me during my promotion for the new Mostro Lounge sale... So you're the one taking care of.. this thing?"

"Aye, they're person, you know! Not just a 'thing.' But yes, i am in charge of taking care of Lovebug."

"I'll just hand them over already... You should really keep a watch on them. They're probably going to cause a big problem if you dont." Azul shook his head before leaving Savannaclaw finally.

"So... Lovebug, what was that about?"

You pulled out a to-go box of fresh food. Food you stole from Azul. A goofy smile spread across your face.

"Ahh... I see! I've trained you well... You deserve a treat for that!" Ruggie smiled along with you, bringing you into the kitchen.

"I know ya may not be tha brightest sometimes, but you're a sneaky lil' thang fo'sho! Here, ya wanna help bake some cookies to go with that meal?"

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

TAGS!!: @cheezy-moon

A little note on how the tagging system works:

If I know you like a character and I end up writing for it, I'll tag you in it (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠)

Also, I have no clue what to put for name replacements so... I'll just do pet names! :D also I wanted to keep this in second person, but I kept it gn when I had to use the pronouns (*⁠´⁠∀⁠｀*⁠)

I also forgot how the mirrors work (⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠) and I gave ruggie a special way of talking! I like writing him speak like that :3

[agentjazzy]

okay it took over a year but me and my mom just finished watching the ENTIRETY of Beverly Hills 90210 so here's a giant text dump of my Thoughts

Matt might have been a late addition, but he was my favorite cast member, all his wrong doings are NOTHING in comparison to the rest of the cast, he deserved a better ending smh 😔

also they COULD'VE snuck in Andrea/Brendon in the end, just a little hint, but they DIDN'T and for that they're COWARDS

Kelly was a mean girl that slowly evolved into such a karen, she got so annoying towards the later seasons 😭 girl is SO entitled and spoiled and ALWAYS found faults in others but when SHE did the same no one??? ever called her out????? terrible

David continually annoyed me with his storylines, but he got less annoying thank GOD tho he still had his moments

rip to Noah tho, they did NOT know what to do with him and stuck him with a Carly rip-off a few eps before the finale to keep him busy but I was NOT invested (and also reminded me of how much I miss Carly 😔 she was played by Hilary Swank and was easily the best actor in the cast until they very suddenly kicked her out 😔😔😔) they could've and should've cut his character wayyy earlier but oh well

Valerie was the baddest bitch (positive) and LOVED manipulating people, then got surprised when those same people did not. like her. she was only a victim of bad writing and deserved better smh 😔 (the way she lost her money was SO STUPID the writing was SO DUMB like WHYY DID SHE DO THAT. UGH)

Gina was no replacement for the type of shit that Val got up to, but at least she was interesting - surprised she wasn't at the finale especially bc it would make narrative sense but Apparently she wasn't written out and instead wanted to leave so that's understandable

Donna was a literal nepo baby and you could tell 😭 her acting was NOT on the level near the others, and she had so much screen time............

(also her mom was classist AND racist, and 2 episodes after she told Donna she couldn't date a black character - who was a fun, interesting character! - they uh. never showed him again 😶 wtf)

rip to Nat's wife and kid, we saw them once and then they Never Mentioned Them Again, not even to babysit, not even a throwaway line, and that's on the gang for being bad friends tbh

also rip to the entire Walsh family, the main house became the Sander's house, which good for them, but I missed Cindy and Jim 😔 they were good parents and funny and they KILLED THEM (sent them to Tokyo)

okay but like. Brenda was SUCH a BITCH (negative) I was happy when she left the cast, she got SO annoying. she let everyone know that she thought she was better than them, then wanted All the attention to be on her, I hope she never leaves London, California doesn't need her

I loved Brandon until they committed character assassination and had him cheat on Kelly for absolutely no reason with a weird character that was more annoying than interesting 😔 as previously mentioned, him and Andrea should've been endgame - they both were single at the end of the series, their chemistry was great

Andrea was fun, her self-righteousness butting heads with reality and her morals were always fun to watch, but I'm sad that they didn't know what to do with her after they made her 1)get pregnant 2)immediately marry the father. she should've and WOULD'VE aborted that thang but the writers were cowards. and also bad at their jobs as evidenced by season 10 showing is that they ARE capable of keeping characters relevant/in the others' stories even when they're parents

Dylan was the most consistent character, even if he's a brat (positive). he kept cheating on people, though EVERYONE in the show did which like. writers. are your relationships okay. the soulmate thing with Kelly was dumb, but his commitment to creating problems just by being there was fun. also loved how he kept throwing money at problems, he was always a brat about it too - my favorite was when he did it to Noah, that's what he gets for trying to kick out Nat tbh

also Dylan was the only person in the cast to do CPR correctly, which isn't relevant to anything, except that Donna probably should've started chest compression with her dad........... dunno why she got mad at Gina when she, as the daughter of a cardiologist, can't even do chest compressions.......................

Steve was the 2nd most consistent character - after they started writing him as a jerk with a heart of gold moreso than just a plain jerk, he was pretty entertaining. even if he is THEE definition of white, rich, male privilege 😭 bro shouldn't have even graduated high school, and DEFINITELY not college. his job was literally handed to him by his dad 😭😭 he was silly and goofy though, which counts when David and Noah were being The Worst. was a highlight tbh, which is saying something, bc there wasn't one but TWO transphobic episodes, of which he was part of 😭 Didn't Like That!

uhmm, let's see, who am I missing......

oh! Janet was fine. at least her characterization was consistent. her and Steve were cute even if I missed Carly and her son - notably she was the ONLY character of color in the main cast which uh. 😐 this show was so white...........

lots of incidental characters of color, but when they dropped the "The Walsh kids help a random person" format, they stopped happening, which sucked. like, again, what happened with the Black guy who was interested in Donna? what happened to Donna's Black friend who she met during the Rose Parade thing?? why can I count the amount of Mexicans in this show on one hand??????!!?!!?? Beverly Hills and LA are white, but not as white as this show made it seem :/

but, anyway, the show was Fine. not very good, sometimes Bad, but mostly Fine. I can't believe I watched 290-something episodes, ten entire seasons

Brandon was my favorite, Steve was good comedic relief, and now I'll be a Matt defender forever, I guess - if I ever see any of their actors on the street, I'll probably say hi

oh! and angels are canonically real btw. also Santa Claus. and Mrs. Claus. so that's fun

also the theme song will forever be in my head now 😔

[nataliedanovelist]

GF - Timestuck AU: The Power of Mabel ch.2

While fighting over a time machine so one twin can win a pig or the other can win the heart of a girl, Mabel is left stranded in a snowy forest with no time machine and no brother. Oops.

The BEAUTIFUL art pieces were done by @clownwry and @elishevart ! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! 😭❤️💋

ch.1 - ch.3

~~~~~~~~~~

Ford was way more nervous than he was letting on.

She had long, pretty brown hair, braces over her teeth, sneakers, a skirt, and a sweater that allowed the cold air to pass through it. Her cheeks were slightly chubby with youth and nosy, as well as her nose, due to the freezing weather. Her eyes matched her hair perfectly, and though they were clouded with fear and confusion, Ford swore he could see sparkling behind the clouds, sparkling that made itself well-known when she asked if she could make him a sweater or when she saw his hands.

She had long, pretty brown hair, braces over her teeth, sneakers, a skirt, and a sweater that allowed the cold air to pass through it. Her cheeks were slightly chubby with youth and nosy, as well as her nose, due to the freezing weather. Her eyes matched her hair perfectly, and though they were clouded with fear and confusion, Ford swore he could see sparkling behind the clouds, sparkling that made itself well-known when she asked if she could make him a sweater or when she saw his hands.

Ford would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy Mabel’s company, but she was practically a stranger, and keeping a random girl in his house that was located in the middle of the woods was fishy and Ford couldn’t help but feel like it was illegal. But he couldn’t leave her out in the snow and send her on her way to find her home and family, so he decided to keep her warm or healthy, simply because it was the right thing to do.

But then she said she had no parents to call. Only a brother, who was lost, too. Ford can remember the old rule: If you’re lost, stay where you are until you are found. So he then decided that she could stay here until her brother found her, which should be by morning at the latest.

Still, he felt uneasy, so once Mabel was settled in front of the TV, Ford excused himself and went into the kitchen to make a phone call. There was only one man who would have better judgement in this situation than him.

The phone rang a few times. Ford checked his watch to make sure it was a reasonable time to call. It wasn’t Sunday, was it? But then the ringing stopped. “Howdy! This here Fiddleford McGucket.”

“Hey there, buddy.” Ford smiled to himself at hearing that cheerful voice. “How have you been?”

“Stanford Pines! Good t’hear from ya!” Fiddleford cheered. “M’just fine, just fine! How are ya?! Ya haven’t gotten eaten by monsters yet, have ya?” He laughed, making his old friend chuckle along.

“No no, I’m alright.” Ford almost brought up the reason he called, but then he remembered something very important to Fiddleford. “How are Emma-May and Tater?”

“OH! They’re doin’ great! We’re all very happy n’ doin’ well! Ya won’t believe how big Tate’s gotten since ya last saw him! He’s already crawlin’!”

“Wow, that's great to hear.” Ford sat in a chair at the kitchen table. “Has he said his first words yet?”

“No, not quite. Actually, he’s extremely quiet. Not a lot of baby-babble.” Fiddleford chuckled. “The doctor says that’s perfectly normal. Tate’s so smart, he’s reachin’ for specific colors n’ such, n’ ya can tell he’s thinkin’ a lot n’ knows what’s goin’ on, he just got nothin’ t’say.”

“I was very shy when I was young.” Ford commented casually. He didn't feel like mentioning why. “If Tate is anything like either of his parents he’s very intelligent.”

“Oh, he’s so much like both of us it’s scary. Ya know Emma-May, so clever n’ quiet n’ such. Tate’s got all that. But he already looks so much like me! But he’s got his mama’s hair! N’ Santy Claus brought ‘im this fun little fishin’ game where ya fish for plastic fish with a pole with a magnet on it, n’ he loves it! I can’t wait to take ‘im fishin’ when he’s big enough! Ya really outta give yourself a break n’ come down for a visit, he’d move to see his Uncle Ford again.”

Ford’s face felt hot. “Perhaps. Spring is when a lot of anomalies are active and breeding, so i would prefer not to miss that, but maybe I could visit for a weekend before that…”

“Well, no pressure, I won’t assume anythang until ya tell me to, just know there’s always a bed for ya here.”

“Thank you, Fiddleford. The same for you and your family. The clean air will do everyone some good.”

“Oh, I’m sure.” Fiddleford sighed happily and perked up. “So! Whatcha callin’ for? Not that I’m not happy just t’chat, but ya never call.”

Ford laughed and shrugged to himself. “I suppose I don’t. I’m sorry.”

“No need t’be sorry, Stanford, just wanna know what’s up.”

“Well, I was hoping to get your advice on something.”

“Shoot.”

“Um… well…” Ford rubbed the back of his neck, unsure how to tell him this. “I heard some unusual sounds outside today…”

“What kind of unusual sounds?”

“Cracks, like lightning. And some faint yelling.” Ford answered. “I thought it might be a tree branch or a new anomaly to catalogue, but when I opened the door a young girl was standing there in the snow with no coat.”

“Heavens! Is she alright?!”

“She’s okay, no frostbite. She was cold, but after sitting by the fire, drinking some hot chocolate, and changing into some dry clothes, she’s okay now.”

“Well, good.”

“So of course I brought her in. I tried to call her parents, she probably got lost playing…”

“Sure.”

“... but she says she doesn’t have any parents.”

“Oh.” Fiddleford sighed. “Oh. Now, wait, are ya sure she didn’t just say that so ya wouldn’t call?”

Ford chuckled and said, “I first thought that too, but she looked too sad to be lying.”

“Okay, I see. Does she got somebody ya can call?”

“She says she has a brother, but he was out there, too. So he is probably out there looking for her and therefore nowhere near a phone.”

“Fair enough, okay. So, I reckon y’all are waitin’ for him t’come ‘round.”

“Yup.”

“Well sounds to me like you’ve handled this all pretty well.” Fiddleford said confidently.

“You think so?” Ford asked. “I can’t help but feel like I’m doing something wrong. Like I’m missing something. Am I doing something wrong?”

“Nonsense, buddy, you’re doin’ great.” Fiddleford assured. “Look here, ya can’t just leave a young gurl out in the snow t’try t’find her way home...”

“I agree.”

“... so ya really got one option n’ that’s t’keep an eye on her n’ let her in as a guest. N’ ya tried t’call, but nothin’. The best thang ya can do right now is be there for this lil’lady n’ just be kind t’her. N’ if nobody comes for her by mornin’, why don’t ya go into town n’ see if anybody knows her, then they can help y’all out.”

Ford nodded, then remembered that his best friend couldn’t see it, so he said, “Yeah, that sounds like a good plan. Thank you, Fiddleford.”

“You’re welcome. N’ hey, are ya okay?” He asked seriously.

“Yes, yes I’m okay. I just want to make sure I do this right.”

“O’course. I understand. Ya want me t’come down there n’ give a hand?”

“No, that’s not necessary. I’m sure Mabel will find her brother in the morning.”

“Mabel, huh? Well, if y’all don’t, please call me. N’ even if ya do find her brother, call me. Keep me updated.”

“I will. Thank you, Fiddleford.”

“Anytime, Stanford.”

~~~~~~~~~~

When Mr. Ford gave Mabel the remote for the old TV and went into the kitchen, she decided to use her awesome detective skills to figure out what year it was. If it was before Grunkle Stan lived here and opened the Mystery Shack, she must be pretty far back in time. But she had no way of knowing if it was 1999 or 2005 or the 50s.

The TV was old, but so was Grunkle Stan’s in her time. So Mr. Ford could have had this TV for a long time and didn’t want to replace it. 

Okay, so when was the TV made? Mabel didn’t know. Dipper would have known.

Okay, Grunkle Stan mentioned watching TV when he was a kid once or twice. So at least Mabel was when Stan was a kid, okay. 

Mabel turned the TV on and it was in color. Okay, so she wasn’t too far back in time. But the TV was playing a commercial for clear skin. The picture was gritty and all the people in it had puffy hair and long socks and oh my god was that woman wearing legwarmers?! Mabel grinned at seeing her favorite fashion on TV, but then her face dropped. When was she?

She tapped her chin and tried to think of how to know the date without being suspicious. She could ask Mr. Ford, but that might be suspicious. Mabel decided to start flicking through channels to try to guess what year she was in based on what was airing. A lot of shows were about cowboys, space, or game shows. Huh. Okay.

All the TV shows were definitely older. Nothing her dad would watch from when he was a kid, so if Mabel had to guess by everyone’s crazy air, the cheesy TV shows, and the music occasionally playing, she was in the 70s.

Huh. Okay. But she needed an exact year. So Mabel turned off the TV, saw an old radio on a desk, and turned it on to listen.

“... cuz it’s cold doesn’t mean you can't boogie, folks! So grab someone you wanna get warm with, turn up the music, and get your bodies warm in the coolest way possible! Here’s Night Fever, by the Bee Gees!”

Mabel grinned at the disco music. Her personal favorite song from these guys was More Than a Woman, but Night Fever would do. For a moment Mabel forgot her mission, jumped off the couch and left the blanket behind, and in the over-sized gray t-shirt Mr. Ford gave her while her clothes were drying, she danced along to the music, singing the chorus since those were the only words she knew.

“When you reach out for me. Yeah, and the feelin' is right,

Then I get night fever, night fever. We know how to do it! Gimme that night fever, night fever. We know how to show it!”

Mabel laughed at herself as she spun around in her socks and tried to do the point-and-hype dance she didn’t know the name to, but everyone did it when a disco song played.

Little did she know that Ford had returned to check on her, and was smiling at her as she shook her hips and waved her hair around and had fun. He leaned against the doorway and planned to let her dance in peace, but when she did a spin and saw him, she grinned and took his hand. “C’mon, Mr. Ford, come dance with me!”

Ford chuckled and shook his head. “No, no! I can’t dance!”

“You got two legs that aren’t broken?”

“Yes.”

“Then you can dance! C’mon!” Mabel encouraged, let him go when they were both in the middle of the room, and she started to dance again. “Don’t make me dance alone!” She even pulled an evil move and gave him puppy eyes. Rude.

Ford smiled slyly at her and hesitantly copied her boogie moves. It was true that Ford never liked to dance, but there was no one around but Mabel, and though he had only known her for an hour or more, he was sure she would never make fun of him.

And he was right.

“Wow! Look at you, Mr. I-Can’t-Dance! Yeah!” Mabel hopped on the couch, standing, and took Ford’s hand. “Here, I’ll spin you!”

Ford laughed and allowed it, doing a single spin, but then scooping her in his arms to dip her and then let her down, making her laugh as they continued to dance. 

“Alright alright, you crazy cats, that was Night Fever by the Bee Gees! It's a snowy day here in the heart of Oregon, with snow flurries coming in harder all night, but it should clear up by morning and be a fun day to go out and play! The date is January 26th, 1978 in case you gotta write a check or mail a thank you note to a friend or family member. I’m still writing letters for Christmas! We’ll be right back with some of your favorites after a word or two from our sponsors, so don’t go anywhere!”

Mabel stared at the radio. “Wow, 1978.” She breathed. Her parents were only kids right now, maybe only six or seven-years-old. Wow.

Ford chuckled. “I know, I’m still in the bad habit of writing ‘77.”

Mabel realized her mistake, but was grateful her host misunderstood her. “Me too.”

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for dinner. How about some ramen noodles?”

“Yes, please! Can we play a game after we eat?”

“Sure. I don’t have many board games, but I do have a deck of cards.”

“Do you know any card tricks?!”

“A few.” Ford admitted, wiggling his fingers. “There are some advantages to having more fingers than average.”

Mabel grinned up at him and followed him to the kitchen for dinner.

[journeywithmo]

Let’s talk! What is the topic you say? LOVE! This simple four-letter word can be so bittersweet. The definition says, “an intense feeling of deep affection” or “a great interest and pleasure in something.” Now that’s Webster version but depending on who you ask and when you ask the question, you will get a different response. If you’re talking to a couple who is new and have fallen freshly in love, then they’ll tell you love is hearing your spouse voice and getting butterflies. They will say it’s the look in the eyes of the person who you want to spend the rest of your life with and even after life has done you wrong you still seeing hope in their eyes. They’ll tell you love is caring for the person even when you’re mad. Forgiving repeatedly and keeping a record of no wrong. They’ll tell you that it is knowing that you are flawed but having someone lend you their glasses just so you can see the same beauty that they see in you. It’s loving someone in spite of the problems that come along. On the other hand, if you were to ask someone who has just got their heartbroken, they’ll tell you that the worse thing in life to do is love. . They’ll tell you that it makes you lose your breath at the mere thought of something going wrong. Love is tear stained pillowcases! Love is your heart literally hurting and feeling like its breaking into a million pieces. Its never wanting to love again. It is months of healing, dealing and getting over. Since this is my writing and it is my topic, I’ll tell you how I feel about love.

Love right now to me has me SCARED out of my mind! In this moment in life love is the one thing that I crave more than anything but also the one thing that I am terrified of! The thought of handing my thoughts, my heart and feelings into the hands of another human being gives me the chills but also excites me at the same time. Love and I haven’t had the best of luck and or history. Starting back from when I could remember I felt like the first man I loved didn’t love me in the same capacity as I loved him therefore I searched high and low to fill that void and replace that longing that was in my heart with something tangible. In the mist of my trying to fill that void I attached myself to people who felt good to me even when I knew they were not good. Yet and still I stayed because what I felt was better than what I had been feeling. That feeling sometimes made me feel good and you know the saying “something is better than nothing” therefore I was going to work with what I had and make the most of it because going back to longing for this feeling again was dead in my book. “Like all things this too shall get better in time” was my thought process. Therefore, I SETTLED! Now while I am sitting there settling anger has begun to replace what I thought was love for the simple reason of I’m not being loved like I want to. Loneliness soon took its place because loneliness is not about a physical thing but more so a mental and emotional one and even though I was with someone I was ALONE I went through all life tribulations by myself with no help from my seat filler. Almost immediately after desperation settled in making itself quite comfortable I became content. See the thing about being desperate is even though you know it’s not right for you, you can’t stop even with the anger and loneliness because just having something or someone is better than having nothing at all therefore you settle and become complacent with all that is going on. Once I evicted those things I was left with that void again finding things instead of people this time to replace what I never felt. You trick your mind into believing that what you have is everything you want and need and no matter how bad it looks or sound getting rid of it would be the death of you. Therefore, you sit, and you wait and you wait and you become angrier and angrier, eventually you get so fed up until finally you evict desperation. What’s left behind after the eviction is not only lost years but wounds. Deep wounds! Ones that you can’t even clean out on your own and the only way they’ll heal is naturally. No medicine, cream, doctor, or kiss can make this boo boo go away. Now you sit back and endure that pain as it comes literally taking everything day by day until eventually you no longer feel the pain. Now, you’re able to move around more and little by little day by day you’re making progress in the best way you know how until the wound closes up. It’s not completely healed because every now and then it hurts and there is an ugly scar that reminds you of the pain, but you feel better. No more late nights crying that the pain goes away. No more not being able to do things with that wounded part of you. You’re better but you know that the scar is still there, and you know what caused it therefore, you are careful with what you do to ensure you never feel that pain again. THAT IS WHERE I’M AT WITH THIS LOVE THANG! I can not and will not reopen this wound is my mindset now. I must protect it because reopening it could mean death for me. Then I sit and think reopening could also mean full and complete healing! Of course, I’ll still have the scar but this time it’s a beauty mark. It reminds me of the bad but shows me how it can all turn into something good. I battle with myself all the time when it comes to love, and it is simply because I don’t trust me with my emotions therefore how am I suppose to trust somebody else? I want to let love and be loved, that’s who I am and literally what I’ve been made to do but I just don’t know how. Therefore, love I have something to say to you

I want you sometimes more than I think you want me! You scare me so bad but I’m willing to see all that you have for me. I wanna trust you again, therefore, take my hand and be gentle with me. Reteach me all the things you intended for me to see. Show me your beauty and the hidden treasures you have buried. I don’t know all that it takes to become one with you but for you I’m willing. My heart is in desperation mode but this time it’s something I never felt before. I feel like you had to show me your ugly side so that I could appreciate you. Help me understand you. Give me all the wisdom and knowledge you have to share this time I promise to be prepared. I don’t know where to start so I figure it’s no better place than here. Vulnerable as can be! Please give yourself to me….

Love always, Mo

[thestarsaroundyourscars]

Whisper

For the weekly reddie prompt by @fyeahreddie

Rating: Teen and Up

Word count: 2,954

Located in AO3

“I told you, Ma, I don’t want to go!” Eddie tells his mother as determined as possible.

“Eddie bear, you’re going and that’s final.”

“But Ma, it’s almost half the summer! I won’t be able to see my friends!”

Sonia grimaces, “It will do you good to spend some time away from them.”

Eddie rolls his eyes, taking a deep breath, somehow all of their arguments always end up being about his choice of friends.

“They’re my friends. You can’t make me stop seeing them.”

“Unfortunately, no. But I can take you with me to visit your aunt and keep you away from them for the summer.  And that’s exactly what I’m going to do,” his mom says, done with the argument.

But Eddie isn’t done. He stands up straight and glares at his mother. Then, with as much resolve as he can muster, he says, “No, I won’t.”

Mrs. Kaspbrak turns to face him, scandalized.

“What did you just say?”

“I said I won’t go with you. I’m sixteen, I can take care of myself for a couple of weeks while you’re away. You can go visit your sister, but I’m not going.”

Eddie watches as his mother’s face turns a deep shade of red and her eyes grow so wide they look like they might pop out. She is holding on to the kitchen table so tight that her knuckles turn white.

Eddie prepares for the inevitable yelling coming his way. Instead, his mother answers in a calm collected voice, which is honestly far more frightening.

“You either come with me this summer or next year, we’re moving to Haven with your aunt Sylvia. See how you and your friends like that.”

The color drains from Eddie’s face, “Y-y-you wouldn’t.” God, he sounds just like Bill. “You hate her, you wouldn’t want to live with her, you’re always complaining about her when we visit, you―”

“It doesn’t matter,” she says, waving him off, “She is growing old and sick and she needs help. We must help those in need, Eddie bear. Besides, if it means finally dragging you away from those vandals you call friends, who have turn you into such a rebellious teenager, you better believe I would.”

Eddie gawks at her in disbelief, he can feel his eyes sting with tears but he refuses to cry in front of his mother. He hasn’t in a long time and he isn’t going to start now.

“That’s not fair,” Eddie says and he hates how his voice cracks, showing his mother just how affected he is.

“Life is as fair as it is safe, Edward,” Sonia says. Then, knowing she won the argument, she turns her back on his son and leaves the kitchen.

Eddie thinks of following her and fighting with her some more, but he knows it’s pointless. He is going with her and there is nothing he can do about it.

The thought of not seeing his friends for five weeks brings back the urge to cry, his throat tightens and his vision turns blurry. He flees to his room and forcefully slams the door shut, knowing his mother will hear it and it will make her angry. Good, he thinks, if I am angry, she should be too.

As soon as he is in his room, he can’t hold back the tears anymore. He throws himself into his bed and starts crying, gripping the pillow tight and occasionally hitting the mattress in anger.

He falls asleep at some point because he wakes up hours later, when there’s no longer sunlight shining through the window. He feels tired and his eyes are swollen from crying.

He hears his mother knocking on his door, which must be what woke him up in the first place.

The thought of his mother brings Eddie’s anger back to the surface and he glares at the door.

“Eddie bear? Dinner’s ready, come eat with me,” she tells him, sweetly as if she hadn’t crushed his summer plans less than a few hours ago.

Eddie doesn’t answer, not only does he not want to talk to her at all, he also knows his voice will come out hoarse and cracked if he does and she will know he had been crying.

“I know you’re not asleep, Eddie,” she says, growing angry, but Eddie doesn’t answer, “Fine, if you want to stay in there and skip dinner, do it but at least start packing, we leave on Monday.”

Eddie groans into the pillow, not caring if his mom hears him or not.

He feels his eyes prickle with tears again but he is done crying, it only makes him feel worse. He needs something to cheer him up, take his mind off of his mother and the summer that awaits him.

As quietly as possible he pads over to his desk where a landline phone is. He dials a phone number that he knows by heart and waits.

Three rings later, he hears someone pick up.

“Casa de Tozier, Richie speaking.”

Eddie lets out a sigh of relief when Richie is the one who answers.

“Richie?” Eddie whispers. He wouldn’t be surprised if his mother was listening from the other side of the door and even if she wasn’t, his room is so close to the kitchen that she might hear him if he raises his voice over a whisper.

“Eddie Spaghetti, hey!” Richie says, excited. Then he lowers his voice, “why are we whispering?”

“My mom doesn’t know I’m calling you and I don’t want her to hear me,” Eddie says and he cringes at how hoarse his voice sounds. He hopes Richie doesn’t notice.

But he is not that lucky.

Richie frowns, “Is everything okay, Eds?” he asks, his usual mocking tone gone, replaced by sincere concern.

“Of course, everything is great,” Eddie says, without a trace of excitement in his voice.

Richie scoffs, “Right. I can tell that you’ve been crying and you didn’t even give me shit for calling you Eddie Spaghetti. Forgive me if I don’t buy it.”

“I’m fine, Rich, really.” Eddie tries to make his voice as normal as possible, but he knows it’s pointless. Richie knows him like the back of his hand.

“Bullshit, Eds.”

Eddie sighs, “I don’t want to talk about it.” If he did, he would start crying again and that’s the opposite of why he called Richie in the first place.

Richie sighs in frustration, “Then what? What do you want me to do, Eds?”

That, Eddie does know how to answer. “Cheer me up, tell me the best joke you’ve got.”

Is clear Richie wants to argue, but instead he says, “All my jokes are amazing, Eds. How am I supposed to choose? Do you want a dirty joke? A silly joke? A your-mom joke?”

“Not a your-mom joke, please. I don’t want to think about her.”

“Ah, so that’s who’s got you so upset. Can’t say I’m surprised.”

“Rich.”

“Okay, sorry. So dirty joke or not?”

“No dirty jokes, please.”

“Prude. Alright, I got it,” Richie clears his throat, “What goes in hard and dry but comes out soft and wet?”

Eddie rolls his eyes, “Richie, I said―”

“Chewing gum! Ha-ha!” Richie exclaims and Eddie can perfectly picture him and his silly grin on the other end of the line.  

He surprises himself by letting out a chuckle, his hand flies to his mouth in an attempt to keep quiet, worried that his mother will hear him. He grabs the phone and moves to the bed, away from the door.

“That’s your best joke?”

“Hey, it made you laugh!” Richie says, offended.

Eddie snorts, “Because of how bad it was.”

“Uh huh, keep telling yourself that. I’m fucking hilarious, Eds.”

“Prove it.”

“Oh, is that a challenge, Eddie my love?”

Eddie chokes on his spit and blushes, just like he always does when Richie calls him that. Not trusting his voice, he hums in response.

Richie clears his throat once again, “The other day the police arrested two kids, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks,” he pauses for dramatic effect, “They charged one – and let the other one off.”

This time Eddie can’t help laughing, he grabs a pillow and burrows his face in it to smother the sound of his laughter. He is still holding the phone to his ear and he is sure Richie can hear him laughing into the pillow, he knows there's probably a self-satisfied smile on his face.

Without giving Eddie a chance to recover, Richie asks, “What is a cannibal’s first choice in a restaurant?” Again, he pauses before delivering the punch line, “The waiter.”

Stupid jokes or not, they have Eddie lying on his side, face pressed against his pillow, crying for the second time that day, this time of laughter.

Richie is really enjoying hearing Eddie laugh like this, especially after hearing the sadness in his friend’s voice when he first called.

“Where do you get virgin wool from?” Richie says, “Ugly sheep!”

By now, Eddie is convulsing with laughter and having trouble breathing.  

“Richie―oh God, please stop,” Eddie says, gasping for air, “My stomach hurts.”

But Richie is having too much of a good time to stop, “Sorry what was that, Eds, one more joke? Sure thang, mah man. What’s black, red, black, red, black, red?”

“Richie no―” Eddie warns him.

But Richie ignores him, “A zebra with a sunburn!”

Eddie continues laughing until his laughter is reduced to giggles. Richie finds that the sound of Eds giggling is just as adorable through the phone as it is in person.

“Beep beep, Richie,” Eddie says, wiping the tears from his eyes.

“But Eds, hearing you laugh is like hearing angels sing. How can you deprive me of that?”

“You’re going to give me an asthma attack, you idiot.”

Richie seems to consider it, he sighs, “Fine.”

“Thank you, Rich.”

“I’m only stopping because I’m not there to shove a fucking inhaler into your mouth.”

Eddie chuckles, “Okay. But that’s not what I was thanking you for.”

“For what then, Eds?”

“Taking my mind off of things, making me laugh, even though I know it pissed you off that I didn’t tell you what was wrong,” Eddie says, staring at the ceiling and playing with the phone’s cord.

“It didn’t piss me off, I just― I was worried, I still am.”

Eddie doesn’t answer for a long time, his breathing the only sign that he’s still on the line. Richie doesn’t say anything either, but Eddie can hear movement through the phone, he is probably walking around his living room, incapable of sitting still.

Eddie hadn’t meant to worry him, he had called Richie because he was the best at making Eddie laugh and he had needed someone to cheer him up, but now that he had made him worry, he felt bad, it wasn’t fair for him.

“My mom is forcing me to go with her to my aunt’s house in Haven this summer.”

The shuffling stops and he hears Richie groan, “For how long?”

“Five weeks.”

Richie gasps, “Five weeks? Shit Eds, that’s like―”

“Half the summer? Yeah.”

“And there’s absolutely no way she’ll let you stay here? Or come back early?” Richie asks, hopeful.

“None, I tried. I told her I wasn’t going, that I was old enough to stay home alone and that she couldn’t make me go.”

Richie chuckles, “That’s my boy.”

Eddie feels his stomach flutter at that. He clears his throat and continues, “She said that if I didn’t go with her, she would move us in permanently with her next year.”

“What the fuck? She can’t do that!” Richie exclaims, outraged.  Eddie hears the sound of a chair falling, Richie must have stood up abruptly, making the chair fall.

“She can. She’s my mother.”

“Well, I’d like to see her try. I’ll fight her if she does. You fucking bet I will.”

Eddie snorts, “You’ll fight my mom?”

“Uh huh.”

“I thought you loved her,” Eddie says with a chuckle.

“Yeah well, I love you more,” Richie says. He hears Eddie gasp and he realizes what he just said, “I mean, uh, you’re― I wouldn’t let her drag you away from me. Us. Your friends I mean,” he stammers, nervous.

Eddie smiles at his ceiling, “Richie?”

“Uh, yeah?”

“I love you too,” Eddie says, grateful that Richie can’t see the way he’s blushing or the dopey smile on his face, “but please don’t fight my mom. She would crush you and still move us away.”

“Wow, you think that little of me, Eds?”

Eddie chuckles, “I’ve seen you fight, Rich. It’s pathetic.”

Richie huffs, “So what? I’m just supposed to sit and watch while she moves you away?”

“Hopefully, it won’t come to that. After all, she’s getting what she wants, which is to ruin my summer by not letting me spend it with you.”

Richie sighs, “This fucking sucks.”

Eddie lets out a humorless laugh, “Fucking tell me about it. I’m going to miss you so much, all of you.”

“But mostly me, eh?” Richie jokes.

“I mean, I’ll kill you if you tell the others but, yeah, mostly you and your ugly face and big mouth.”

He can hear the shit-eating grin on Richie’s voice, “You love this face, Eds. As for this big mouth, you should know it has its advantages.”

“Beep beep, asshole.” Eddie says, shaking his head. Richie lets out a chuckle. “Promise me you won’t have too much fun while I’m gone.”

Richie snorts, “As if. I will― I mean, we will probably be miserable.”

“Not as miserable as me, I bet―” He hears movement in the kitchen and he snaps his mouth shut, worried that his mother heard him and it’s coming to his room to take the phone away from him.

“Eds?”

Eddie shushes him and waits but his mother never comes barging into his room.

He sighs in relief, “Sorry, I thought my mom heard us,” he whispers.

“So, when are you leaving?”

“Monday.”

Alarmed, Richie exclaims, “Monday? But that’s one day away!”

“I know.”

Richie groans, “That’s it. You’re coming over tomorrow.”

Eddie frowns, “If your plan is to hide me and hope my mom just leaves me behind, you should know she would burn your house down before doing that.”

“Well shit, there goes my plan!” Richie replies, making Eddie chuckle. “No, but seriously, you’re coming over.”

“Why?” Eddie asks, confused.

“Because, my dearest Eddie, if I’m not going to see you for five weeks I should at least get to say goodbye properly.”

“I can’t come over tomorrow, Rich.”

“What? Why?”

“Because we’re all going to the quarry, remember? Bill told us yesterday.”

“Shit, yeah, I forgot.” Richie says, upset.

“You can say goodbye to me there. You all can.”

“Uh huh.”

Eddie frowns at Richie’s tone, “What’s wrong?”

“It’s just that the moment everyone knows you’re leaving they will be all over you and, I uh, I kind of wanted it to be just us, you know. It’s silly, I know and fucking selfish.”

“It’s not,” Eddie says, quietly, “You can come over later tonight. If you want.”

Richie lit up at that, “Really?”

“Yeah, you might need to climb through the window though, and we need to be quiet, if my mom finds out, she’ll kill you.”

“No problemo, Spaghetti-o. I was in the mood for climbing a tree anyways.”

Eddie chuckles, “Try to be quiet though, she almost caught you last time.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Eds, I’m stealthy like a ninja.”

Eddie snorts, “So stealthy that you tripped on your way in and brought my desk chair down with you.”

“That desk chair shouldn’t have gotten in my way.”

Eddie shakes his head, “It wasn’t the chair’s fault. You’re just clumsy.”

“I am not!” When he hears Eddie huff, he adds, “Okay, maybe a little.”

Eddie chuckles, “I’ll see you soon, you idiot.”

“Don’t forget to leave your window open.”

“Don’t worry,” Eddie says, preparing to hang up. But before he does, he adds, “Hey Rich?”

“Yeah, Eds?”

“Thanks again, you always know how to make me feel better.”

“You don’t have to thank me. There’s nothing I enjoy doing more, Eddie Spaghetti.”

Eddie smiles, “Don’t call me that.”

Richie laughs, “Now there’s the Eds I know and love.”

Eddie giggles and he feels like a high school girl with a crush, lying in bed, twirling the phone’s cord around his finger and giggling at Richie’s flirting. He needs to pull himself together by the time Richie shows up because then he won’t be able to hide his blush behind a phone. That doesn't keep him from wanting Richie to get there though.

“Bye, Richie,” Eddie whispers, a smile on his face before hanging up the phone.

He hears his mother leave the kitchen then, probably going to her room to sleep. Eddie can’t help being glad, he might have been able to keep quiet while on the phone with his friend, but Richie himself is incapable of being quiet.  

Eddie opens the window and goes to lie on his bed to wait for Richie to get there. He thinks it’s crazy how less than an hour ago he had been feeling terrible and now he’s in a great mood, all thanks to him.

Sure he’s still angry at his mother and hates the idea of spending his summer away from his friends, away from Richie but he thinks that maybe this is the way he will make it through, without being completely miserable, exchanging whispered phone conversations with the only person who can make it all better for him, one Richie Tozier.

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[iamtheunicornprincess]

Aight, folks. I think we can all agree on one thing: Audio gear is expensive. Unless you find it at a yard sale, sold by someone confusing a heavy duty multi-voiced monster for a kid’s toy (but hey, even a snot-covered Fisher Price xylophone from a Savers can be sampled into something beautiful), the chances of you finding a deal is going to be rare. If you are a sound person, then stories of such rarity buys will be over-told for decades to come; your audio friends will loudly resent you with a smile and ask you retell said legend again, and again. Usually, though, you’ll save up and look forward to the weekend you can finally spend together with your new, shiny, synth companion. 

Lately, I find myself longing so badly for my own space. I want a home. I grew up in a family of eight with five siblings, and while my childhood reeked of copious amounts of people related to me going in my room while I was out and touching my shit, and blurting pieces of my diary over the dinner table, and picking up the other end of a landline to eavesdrop, living with roommates is different. I’ve had some INCREDIBLE roommates, and would continue to live with them if I didn’t have to leave Boston/they hadn’t moved. But, I dunno. Although I foresee a future of travels and while I’m a more “go with the wind” type of person, there is something really, really calming about not having all my shit stuffed into a 10′x10′ bedroom in the most boring section of Brooklyn (though I did have a package stolen from me yesterday [and I not-so-secretly hope said salt lamp that s/he stole falls on their foot]). My dream is to someday own a house, once the terrors of student loans have surpassed, and I want a backyard. But, most of all, I want a STUDIO. And today, I am going to leave a list of my dream gear that I currently do not own that I would love to have in my said future studio (NOTE: Many of you have probably seen pictures of me using some of these items. I am lucky enough to have worked in two recording facilities that housed them and, like a good studio person should do, I utilized them to the point where parting ways from some of them still makes me sad. However, they were not mine). 

DREAM GEAR 

Arturia Minibrute

Some people might kind of wonder why the Minibrute is here: It’s not super expensive for an analog synth (you could probably find it under $300 at this point). But you know what? I don't own it right now, because I had access to it for quite a while before I moved. You’ll hear a great deal of it on my upcoming record, so over the past year or so, I’ve been nonstop mixing tracks I created with it. Even though I *could* buy it right now, I am so frugal with my finances when it comes to buying anything for myself. But, anyway - the Minibrute is great. I love the Microbrute, as well, but the Minibrute has a special place in my heart because of the dirty, gritty noise channel you can add to the mix, along with a sub and three other oscillators. Pretty sweet, especially since it has MIDI, CV, and a straight 1/4″ output. Can’t go wrong. I just love the sound... Anything gritty will have my heart.

OTO Biscuit

I kind of need to just get one of these because of how rare they are. This is the best distortion/bitcrusher I’ve ever used. I love running vocals with it, I love how easily out of control-sensitive it is, and I will love lo-fi for life. 

Roland Juno 106

Because, duh. This baybee is a classic. It has six voices. Despite it being fairly easy to track down, I’m well aware that the most common issue with this synth is voices dying (but you gotta remember that you’ll most likely purchase one that’s never had a voice replaced since, like, ever, and it’s from 1984). However, it’s EXPENSIVE to replace voices, and Roland does not create them anymore (it would be wishful thinking for them to, but as they don’t produce the 106s anymore...). BUT, there is someone who created a more functional voice IC replacement (check out Analogue Renaissance for more info on voice replacements. Just be wary that he will charge you for asking questions that have already be answered on his site, so read carefully). I’ve promised myself that I wouldn’t get a dog ‘till I have the time for one (duh?) AND money for any unexpected vet visits, so I’ll do the same for the Juno 106 (unless purchased with replacement voices).

ARP Odyssey 1978 MK III 

VINTAGE. NOT THE REMAKE. NOT THE APP. NOT THE MINI OR FULL SIZE FROM KORG. NOT THE EBAY SELLER PRETENDING IT’S A VINTAGE WHEN IT’S A KORG. I SEE YOU.  IT NEEDS TO BE THE VINTAGE MK III FROM 1978. Okay, let me explain: This synth holds a huge place in my heart. During the hardest parts of my life in late 2015 to mid 2016, I couldn’t sleep normal hours, or create. My anxiety was out of control and I had literally three full on attacks a day and I didn’t want anybody to know. So, even though I couldn’t do much to fix any of those issues at the time, I needed to do something. So,  I would force myself to pour over the manual for this synth every time I felt a panic attack creeping up, and would press random keys and hit record. The old sound of it would distract me. I don’t know. I just associate this synth with comfort. Every time I was sad, I would have this synth in front of me. I’d leave my apartment at odd hours of the night to go sit with it and hope something good would be recorded out of it. So, yeah - when I buy this synth, it needs to be vintage. It’s just sentimental and if I could buy the same synth I used, I would. And, yes, I love how it gets out of tune. A whole track on Living Proof is totally in tune with the Odyssey, but out of tune with... everything else. You’ll see. 

ARP 2600

Again - the original, not the TTSH clone. The first time I ever saw this synth, it did not fascinate me -- I was 19, and I was terrified. It was 2009, and I was enrolled in Michael Brigida’s class at Berklee College of Music (he was my modular synthesis & signal flow professor and he’s worked on every ARP machine ever and was one of the best teachers I have ever had). Back then, the synth was held in A59 in 150 Massachusetts Ave. The room had no windows and reeked of mildew, and on the first day of class, myself and my classmates trekked down the hall from our classroom and watched Michael calmly create different patches. I was the shortest in the class, and I was the only girl, and I was painfully shy.  I wore a black fitted hoodie with spikes almost every day and I was fucking weird. Everyone in the class just seemed to understand what was going on and I just stood there, hardly able to see anything (because, well, I’m just shy of 5′3′’). Listening in awe, I felt like a total idiot. I had no idea what this modularapolis kajargen was and I was too afraid to ask for help. I clearly remember Brigida telling us to ‘not fear the synth!’ and to ‘make it fear you!', but everyone in the class just seemed at ease and I was, well, not!  Fast forward four years -- I got a lot more experience in the game audio and synth hardware world, and I was hired by the department, and the more I worked there, the more I saw that, sure, some people DID just have a knack for that kind of stuff right off the bat, but a lot of times, people wore a concrete-made poker face. I had already been employed by AKAI at that point and had gotten over my insecurities a little bit. And it was ME that everyone was now asking for help, since, you know, that was my job (those days, I worked 80+ hours a week between there and AKAI). I felt a little less alienated  that I was not the only person in fear of getting my ego hurt around the 2600, and I used this time to really learn it so I could help others understand it. Anyway, I’d go into work on days the facility was closed, and own it so I was more prepared to teach students it when class started back up. This synth taught me a lot about getting past insecurities, and guess what - I’m not so afraid of that synth anymore! Ha!

Yamaha CS15

This synth is so underrated and so cool. Made in 1979 for a few years onwards, it just sounds like how you think it would. Good luck finding one online that isn’t from Japan and doesn’t require a power converter. And if you find one and are feeling generous, my birthday is June 1st. 

THE KLEE 

Okay. I used modular eurorack systems quite a bit when I still lived in Boston. I do not own a system right now. However, The Klee. Is. A. Monster. I was immediately drawn to it because 1. it’s a sequencer and, um, I love sequencers and 2. it has green LEDs and buttons. I unapologetically love the color scheme of that thing, and it sounds fucking awesome. However, it will take up almost your entire rack case. Google it (sorry not sorry). You can build it from scratch for a little over $500 or buy it complete for a little less than $1,000.

 Avalon 737sp

Coolest preamp & compressor ever. I always “got” EQs, but compressors used to confuse the crap out of me. Ratios? Math!? I wanna do MUSIC (...till you realize a music technologist is more mathematically inclined than you’d be willing to admit, ha!). However, the Avalon really helped me understand what was happening to sound while changing up parameters manually, as opposed to staring at a stock plugin in Pro Tools and visually trying to hear results, if that makes sense. I just understand tech better when hands on. Anyway, one of my favorite producers of all time, Mark Ronson, has used them in recordings and the second I learned that, bam. Look at me! I can make myself burp AND I can use compressors with my eyes closed! 

Empirical Labs Distressor

Mostly because every studio I’ve worked in has them next to each other and I like the comparison. And it sounds good. I still prefer the 737 but I love this thang, too. 

Moog Sub 37

SOUNDS GOOD. MY MAIN HOBBY INCLUDES GOING INTO SAM ASH AND WAITING FOR GOSPEL GROUPS TO FINISH THEIR SYNTH JAM SESH SO I CAN GO INTO THE ISOLATION ROOM AND ROCK OUT ON THIS MOOG. 

Electro-Voice RE20

Just like the ‘wand chooses the wizard’ (and yes, I heard Ollivander’s voice when I wrote that), everyone will usually resonate to at least one mic that makes their non-traditional voice sound... okay. Heck, maybe it’ll even sound good! I really adore this microphone. I haven’t bought it because I have spent time in facilities over the past 4 years that have owned it everywhere I’ve went, but someday, it shall be mine. It’s mainly used in broadcasting, but, I dunno. I use it when recording my own voice singing because I just like how it makes it sound. I also like that Thom Yorke used it in a show once. Very coolio. Google ‘Radiohead RE20′ and I’m sure that basement show will pop up.

DSI Tempest

Um, coolest drum machine I’ve ever used. That thing is a beast. I love the weird sounds you can make, the sequences you can create, and I’m happy that DSI finally created a couple updates for it. Hell yizzzzzeah.

Crumar Bit-01

This synth came to my attention the other day and ohhhhhh my god, it sounds good. It’s so awesome. I played three seconds of a demo video and I said ‘gimme’. 

Otari MTR12

Very cool tape machine I started to mess with at one of the studios I support. It looks like an oven. Everything just sounds better with tape. 

-

And that is all I can think of, for now. May you all have a synth filled week.

Cheers!

x The Unicorn Princess

[mysteriouslyzealouspandalov-blog]

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

New Post has been published on https://relationshipguideto.com/must-see/relationship-myths-debunked-by-a-professional-to-calm-your-woes/

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

Unless you met your significant other in high school, dating is really hard and anxiety-inducing for, like, every moment until you are officially in a relationship (and then that’s where the real work starts). Even God’s gift to humanity, Serena van der Woodsen, struggled on the dating scene, which is truly troubling for normal people. Yes, I am aware that SVDW is a fictional character, but even Blake Lively had to swim through a sea of Kelly Blatz’s and Penn Badgley’s before finding Ryan Reynolds. I guess the only upside to having no idea what is happening in my love life is that I have at least one thing in common with Blake Lively—kind of. Don’t ruin this for me.

So, I met someone a little over a month ago who checks all of my boxes, and even though my therapist and Hannah Montana both say nobody’s perfect, this guy is pretty damn close. Except for one thing: We don’t hang out more than like, once a week, which I didn’t realize was an issue until one of my happily married friends forced her unsolicited opinion on me shared her concerns with me. Since then, I have not been able to stop thinking about where this relationship (can I even call it that?) is heading, if anywhere. Have I been so burned by former boyfriends that my bar is set unreasonably low, or am I so smitten that I can’t see an obvious red flag? So like any neurotic New Yorker, I took to the experts and consulted Dr. Jenny Taitz, a clinical psychologist and author of How To Be Single and Happy, to make me feel better and debunk a few common misconceptions about dating.  

If You Aren’t Hanging Out Multiple Times A Week Within The First Month, You’re Doomed

So this is obviously what initiated my downward spiral line of questioning, and I was very eager to hear a professional’s opinion on the matter. Here’s what Dr. Taitz had to say: “It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. If you’re seeing each other once a week and spending four or five hours on a Saturday actually talking about real things, rather than meeting up at like, midnight, it’s not a bad sign.” And, as much as I hate to admit that anyone aside from myself is right, she has a point. For instance, I used hang out with my FWB like three nights a week, which was both great and horrible. It was nice because we got to see a lot of each other, which is more than I can say about the current guy I’m seeing, but all FWB and I did together was the old school definition of Netflix and Chill and then the ~relationship~ just kind of shriveled up and died. Welp.

So this horrendous experience is shedding some light on my current situation: I have to (slightly) rely on positive and negative indicators for answers about his feelings for me or where he sees us going. As cliche as it is to admit, trusting your gut is usually the right thing to do, and I def knew that FWB wasn’t going to pan out. If he’s showing you zero signs of wanting to be your boyfriend at some point in the future, chances are, he won’t be.

If You Can’t Sleep At His Apartment, You’re Not Comfortable With Him

If there is something more intimate than sleeping next to someone, LMK. Honestly, I have been told I’m low-maintenance to sleep next to because I don’t really move or make sound other than quiet breathing, which is prob better than absolute silence (creepy). Anyway, even though I’m a pretty easy bedmate, I still get so insecure sleeping next to someone until I feel absolutely comfortable with him. For instance, Mr. Almost Perfect loves to snuggle, which is adorable and sweet, but after a few hours, half my body is numb and I need to switch positions, but I can’t because I don’t want to wake him up so I just lay there in agony waiting for him to roll over on his own. Look, I’ve had plenty of sleepovers with my girlfriends and if they unconsciously make their way onto my side, I have zero issue waking their asses up and delivering them back to their side. So why can’t I do that with a guy I’m seeing? Am I becoming a nice person who’s concerned about the wellbeing and restfulness of others? Doubtful, but Dr. Taitz says, “There are a lot of reasons why people can’t sleep. Sometimes people can’t sleep because they’re excited. It doesn’t necessarily have to do with physical or mental comfort.” As someone who can fall asleep literally anywhere, I was getting a little worried about what my restless nights in Bushwick (I know) might signal for my not-yet-relationship, but I feel a bit better now!

If You’re Affectionate Towards Each Other, The Relationship Is Just Physical

To clarify, I hate PDA more than I hate most things in this world. However, little things like holding my excessively clammy hand, putting your arm around me, or letting me have the first bite of whatever dessert we’re “sharing” make me happy. And in any given relationship, I am the affectionate one, which is totally fine with me, but Mr. Almost Perfect is also super warm and mushy, which is confusing to me! Is he being so touchy and sweet in response to me acting that way or is he just like that? Dr. Taitz says, “Touching is a good example of showing closeness, and being affectionate through touch is never a bad thing.” Generally, trust your gut. If it feels sweet and genuine, it probably is. Plus, there’s generally no sh*tty and disappointing meaning to an innocent hand hold.

However, if his hand always manages to find its way to your butt, well, hopefully you know what that means. Lastly, Dr. Taitz admits, “It’s really fascinating how our mind tries to undermine our joy and replace closeness with worry.” That’s literally what I am doing right now. Lastly, “You should ask yourself what you have in common besides the physical touch, because I’m sure if you want to touch someone, there’s something that’s attracting you well beyond the physical.” There is, there def is.

If You Don’t Like His Friends, You Eventually Won’t Like Him

Dr. Taitz says, “It’s safe to say he’s probably not a clone of his friends. We need to be okay with the element of uncertainty and not knowing everything we would want to know right away.” Hopefully, I’ll find out soon what the deal with his friends is, but people’s friends are not always a mirror reflection of who they are. I have a friend who knows more about what’s happening in Washington than Trump does, which honestly isn’t saying much, but he likes to bring politics into every conversation he has and it’s as annoying as it seems, if not more so. I have another friend who is like, an actual drama magnet, and seeing her is more exhausting than a SoulCycle class on a Sunday morning. But I love them and, needless to say, they aren’t shedding any negative light on my personality or self because they are the way they are, but more importantly, I am not them. Yes, sometimes “you are the company you keep” can ring true, but other times it just doesn’t—you can’t tell without getting to know the person.

If You Aren’t Texting All Day Every Day, The Communication Needs Work

Nothing bugs me more than when someone texts me “Hey, what’s up?” Like, are we supposed to have a full-fledged convo via text right now? The only reasons I text someone are when something very specific to that person just happened or if we making plans. Mr. Almost Perfect is the same way, so when we aren’t together, we aren’t really texting, like, ever. Every now and then we will say something stupid to check in and make sure the other is still alive, but we are definitely not those people who are constantly, like, tagging each other in vague memes and saying goodnight with kissy face emojis on the daily. No judgment if that’s your vibe, but gross. I kind of like it this way because I will never read into a text or lack thereof. Do you know how stressed out I used to get trying to decipher the convoluted and hidden messages buried in texts of past boyfriends? For instance, I texted a guy I had been seeing for a few weeks, “Let’s do something tonight” and he responded with “Do you want to?” Like, yes?? What kind of answer is that?! So the lack of constant texting actually takes a massive headache off the table. The only reason I am even discussing this is because after a dinner with a friend, she was shook that my boo thang didn’t call or text during the entire 75 minutes of dinner. I was not shook at all because I’ve had English Lit classes longer than that, but she thought it was so weird that she warned me to “watch out for this one.” Okay, mom, I shall. But Dr. Taitz says, “I highly recommend against texting all day because it can definitely create false feelings and a false sense of intimacy. If you are confident that when you see each other you will talk and catch up, you don’t need to have that insecure attachment to texting.” Brilliant.

The bottom line is that only you and the other person in the relationship are the ones who can take the temperature of the situation. So even if your friends have been in really similar situations, your friends and their SOs aren’t you and yours, so you can’t really listen to them. Of course, some things can seem like a red flag and others a green light, which makes the situation slightly easier to navigate, but until the “what are we?” conversation is had, the only thing we can do is know what we know, which is usually not enough to make any accurate predictions about where it’s going and what it all means.

Images: Unsplash; Giphy (3)

Read more: https://www.betches.com

[relationshipadviser-blog]

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

New Post has been published on https://relationshipqia.com/must-see/relationship-myths-debunked-by-a-professional-to-calm-your-woes/

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

Unless you met your significant other in high school, dating is really hard and anxiety-inducing for, like, every moment until you are officially in a relationship (and then that’s where the real work starts). Even God’s gift to humanity, Serena van der Woodsen, struggled on the dating scene, which is truly troubling for normal people. Yes, I am aware that SVDW is a fictional character, but even Blake Lively had to swim through a sea of Kelly Blatz’s and Penn Badgley’s before finding Ryan Reynolds. I guess the only upside to having no idea what is happening in my love life is that I have at least one thing in common with Blake Lively—kind of. Don’t ruin this for me.

So, I met someone a little over a month ago who checks all of my boxes, and even though my therapist and Hannah Montana both say nobody’s perfect, this guy is pretty damn close. Except for one thing: We don’t hang out more than like, once a week, which I didn’t realize was an issue until one of my happily married friends forced her unsolicited opinion on me shared her concerns with me. Since then, I have not been able to stop thinking about where this relationship (can I even call it that?) is heading, if anywhere. Have I been so burned by former boyfriends that my bar is set unreasonably low, or am I so smitten that I can’t see an obvious red flag? So like any neurotic New Yorker, I took to the experts and consulted Dr. Jenny Taitz, a clinical psychologist and author of How To Be Single and Happy, to make me feel better and debunk a few common misconceptions about dating.  

If You Aren’t Hanging Out Multiple Times A Week Within The First Month, You’re Doomed

So this is obviously what initiated my downward spiral line of questioning, and I was very eager to hear a professional’s opinion on the matter. Here’s what Dr. Taitz had to say: “It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. If you’re seeing each other once a week and spending four or five hours on a Saturday actually talking about real things, rather than meeting up at like, midnight, it’s not a bad sign.” And, as much as I hate to admit that anyone aside from myself is right, she has a point. For instance, I used hang out with my FWB like three nights a week, which was both great and horrible. It was nice because we got to see a lot of each other, which is more than I can say about the current guy I’m seeing, but all FWB and I did together was the old school definition of Netflix and Chill and then the ~relationship~ just kind of shriveled up and died. Welp.

So this horrendous experience is shedding some light on my current situation: I have to (slightly) rely on positive and negative indicators for answers about his feelings for me or where he sees us going. As cliche as it is to admit, trusting your gut is usually the right thing to do, and I def knew that FWB wasn’t going to pan out. If he’s showing you zero signs of wanting to be your boyfriend at some point in the future, chances are, he won’t be.

If You Can’t Sleep At His Apartment, You’re Not Comfortable With Him

If there is something more intimate than sleeping next to someone, LMK. Honestly, I have been told I’m low-maintenance to sleep next to because I don’t really move or make sound other than quiet breathing, which is prob better than absolute silence (creepy). Anyway, even though I’m a pretty easy bedmate, I still get so insecure sleeping next to someone until I feel absolutely comfortable with him. For instance, Mr. Almost Perfect loves to snuggle, which is adorable and sweet, but after a few hours, half my body is numb and I need to switch positions, but I can’t because I don’t want to wake him up so I just lay there in agony waiting for him to roll over on his own. Look, I’ve had plenty of sleepovers with my girlfriends and if they unconsciously make their way onto my side, I have zero issue waking their asses up and delivering them back to their side. So why can’t I do that with a guy I’m seeing? Am I becoming a nice person who’s concerned about the wellbeing and restfulness of others? Doubtful, but Dr. Taitz says, “There are a lot of reasons why people can’t sleep. Sometimes people can’t sleep because they’re excited. It doesn’t necessarily have to do with physical or mental comfort.” As someone who can fall asleep literally anywhere, I was getting a little worried about what my restless nights in Bushwick (I know) might signal for my not-yet-relationship, but I feel a bit better now!

If You’re Affectionate Towards Each Other, The Relationship Is Just Physical

To clarify, I hate PDA more than I hate most things in this world. However, little things like holding my excessively clammy hand, putting your arm around me, or letting me have the first bite of whatever dessert we’re “sharing” make me happy. And in any given relationship, I am the affectionate one, which is totally fine with me, but Mr. Almost Perfect is also super warm and mushy, which is confusing to me! Is he being so touchy and sweet in response to me acting that way or is he just like that? Dr. Taitz says, “Touching is a good example of showing closeness, and being affectionate through touch is never a bad thing.” Generally, trust your gut. If it feels sweet and genuine, it probably is. Plus, there’s generally no sh*tty and disappointing meaning to an innocent hand hold.

However, if his hand always manages to find its way to your butt, well, hopefully you know what that means. Lastly, Dr. Taitz admits, “It’s really fascinating how our mind tries to undermine our joy and replace closeness with worry.” That’s literally what I am doing right now. Lastly, “You should ask yourself what you have in common besides the physical touch, because I’m sure if you want to touch someone, there’s something that’s attracting you well beyond the physical.” There is, there def is.

If You Don’t Like His Friends, You Eventually Won’t Like Him

Dr. Taitz says, “It’s safe to say he’s probably not a clone of his friends. We need to be okay with the element of uncertainty and not knowing everything we would want to know right away.” Hopefully, I’ll find out soon what the deal with his friends is, but people’s friends are not always a mirror reflection of who they are. I have a friend who knows more about what’s happening in Washington than Trump does, which honestly isn’t saying much, but he likes to bring politics into every conversation he has and it’s as annoying as it seems, if not more so. I have another friend who is like, an actual drama magnet, and seeing her is more exhausting than a SoulCycle class on a Sunday morning. But I love them and, needless to say, they aren’t shedding any negative light on my personality or self because they are the way they are, but more importantly, I am not them. Yes, sometimes “you are the company you keep” can ring true, but other times it just doesn’t—you can’t tell without getting to know the person.

If You Aren’t Texting All Day Every Day, The Communication Needs Work

Nothing bugs me more than when someone texts me “Hey, what’s up?” Like, are we supposed to have a full-fledged convo via text right now? The only reasons I text someone are when something very specific to that person just happened or if we making plans. Mr. Almost Perfect is the same way, so when we aren’t together, we aren’t really texting, like, ever. Every now and then we will say something stupid to check in and make sure the other is still alive, but we are definitely not those people who are constantly, like, tagging each other in vague memes and saying goodnight with kissy face emojis on the daily. No judgment if that’s your vibe, but gross. I kind of like it this way because I will never read into a text or lack thereof. Do you know how stressed out I used to get trying to decipher the convoluted and hidden messages buried in texts of past boyfriends? For instance, I texted a guy I had been seeing for a few weeks, “Let’s do something tonight” and he responded with “Do you want to?” Like, yes?? What kind of answer is that?! So the lack of constant texting actually takes a massive headache off the table. The only reason I am even discussing this is because after a dinner with a friend, she was shook that my boo thang didn’t call or text during the entire 75 minutes of dinner. I was not shook at all because I’ve had English Lit classes longer than that, but she thought it was so weird that she warned me to “watch out for this one.” Okay, mom, I shall. But Dr. Taitz says, “I highly recommend against texting all day because it can definitely create false feelings and a false sense of intimacy. If you are confident that when you see each other you will talk and catch up, you don’t need to have that insecure attachment to texting.” Brilliant.

The bottom line is that only you and the other person in the relationship are the ones who can take the temperature of the situation. So even if your friends have been in really similar situations, your friends and their SOs aren’t you and yours, so you can’t really listen to them. Of course, some things can seem like a red flag and others a green light, which makes the situation slightly easier to navigate, but until the “what are we?” conversation is had, the only thing we can do is know what we know, which is usually not enough to make any accurate predictions about where it’s going and what it all means.

Images: Unsplash; Giphy (3)

Read more: https://www.betches.com

[yllem]

Softball 2017- June 4th

Royals: My mighty Royals are back in action this year! Of the 13 players I coached last season, 11 returned and I drafted ALL of them. Softball was not for Abby and Zoe moved to baseball. I want to say nice things about them all and my season! Or bad things! Whatever!

To begin, these kids aren’t as good as Morgan at first, so we won’t clobber everyone this year, but I have finally mastered lineups and keeping them all together. This year feels very organized and having 9 returning players on this team with their families is a blessing.

Calleigh: I am so impressed with her improvements as a softball player! Not only is she hitting very well (with Laura’s old bat I might add), but her glove is really improving and she is looking great at first base! What helps Calleigh is her size and athletic ability through multiple sports. I see her becoming a very good softball player.

Haley: My little bundle of joy, Haley keeps everything so jolly on the field and connects with any team she is near. She has made great strides as a player, assuming because her dad probably works with her. I am hoping she gets the opportunity to play up this year in midget. With her passion for the sport, she will also have a very successful softball career.

Bella: My fourth season coaching, and my fourth year with Bella! I love the company of she and Vince. What hurts Bella is that she is so small. If we can give her confidence, she won’t shut down because she is discouraged. She’s come a long way with fielding ground balls. Just need to break her bad habits while throwing and she will lead the team.

Sophia: Wow, Sophia improves every year. Erica told me that one day she also wants to coach softball which warms my heart. I feel like I’ve been a good role model to them! She is hitting so well, even though I am throwing the balls to her fast. Her glove has also gotten better, but we need to break her noodle arms and she will be ready to move up. Very impressed with her! Love this family and having her on my team for a third season.

Ava: Little Ava is still so little which has hurt her playing ability, but she always improves throughout the season and brings a her sweetness and energy to the team. Don’t know where I would be without her over these last three years!

Giana: I have seen improved focus from her in our third season together. She’s still my silly, funny, catcher, and her bat is always improving. If we can keep her focused 100% of the time she could be a good little player. She just turned 7, so she will have at least one more season in pee wee, if not, two for insurance. Having Ray on the field is an invaluable asset. Such a fun guy!

Allison: I am always impressed by her knowledge of the game and her playing ability. She joined our team for the second year a little late, and I cannot be happier about having her with us. She’s adorable for starters, but an incredible little player. Will be an incredible softball player. No question.

Keira: The Keeney family is so helpful and kind. Glad that we can be together, again! Keira, Keira, so clever and quick... she’s one of Joe’s favorite girls for that reason. Always makes us laugh. She has come such a long way this year and I love hearing her talk about how excited she is to play in midget. Power to ya, little thang!

Lucy: Ahh, Lucy... so energetic and fun, but really lacking focus this year. I adore she and her parents, so I am hoping she warms up throughout the season. She’s only played one game so far, but became successful throughout last season. Spirit award winner last year..

Charlotte: One of my new girls! I can’t believe that Charlotte is only 6 sometimes. She’s so big! She’s really great about making contact with the bat, despite it being her first season. As long as she is paying attention, she is also pretty solid with keeping ground balls in front of her and has an impressive arm for someone so young. Her mom is so excited to be out there, and her dad will probably be a coach one day, haha.

Aubrie: Anotha newbie. I see a lot of improvement to come from Aubrie, especially when games are not so spaced out. She works hard and is warming up the the sport. It helps to have Giana on the team to bring her out of that shell. 

Claire: Little stud, how is your form so perfect your first year? Claire is very excited to play midget next year, which is something I love to hear! I am hoping she does not get bored playing down and will have to give her more responsibility. Her dad Jim has been helpful as well. What a sweetheart. Fits right in with the girls as if she’s played with us for years!

London: She is only 5 years old which makes things really hard. She cries a lot on the field and consistently comes late or not at all without mention. If she can stay engaged, I hope to see improvement. Otherwise, I’m just trying not to lose my shit babysitting. Sweet kid, but five might be too young for softball unless a parent is on staff to help coach.

Angels: This year started off pretty tough.. I picked a studddd out of the evaluation as my pool pitcher and she quit without even coming to one practice, saying the team wouldn’t be competitive enough for her. Whatever, dude. This dad has coached before and said he felt bad but I think that’s a load of garbage. Luckily, in the draft, I took a lot of beginning pitchers and both are coming along great! I learned today that the girl I got to replace the studdd taught herself to pitch and is slow, but can throw strikes. That means I have five girls that can pitch in games, and three more young ones to develop. Nice! 

So far on the season, we have played three games. The first got called for darkness. Had we played the last inning, we would have won. The second game was a slaughter, and the last one we won! Excited for our three games this week.

Morgan: My second year with this all in, all out player. I love her passion for the sport and she never fails to impress me with her willingness to play anywhere and learn any position. She is working on pitching currently, catching really well, and is always solid as a short stop. One of my favorite kids ever and I am so lucky to have snagged her early in the draft for a second year.

Angie: Our second season together, Angie is either on or off with her effort. If we can straighten some things out, she could be a solid player. I feel the need to protect her since I know her situation. She is a sweet girl and I am hoping to see a lot from her this season. She has improved SO much.

Tatiana: Little miss Seattle commutes from downtown to be on this team. She can step on the mound and throw strikes with a big smile on her face. I like that she is able to make friends in the city this way. She’s a strong player, but gets a little rusty. As long as she lays off the high pitches, this girl is going to be a killer.

Arabella: I am so happy that everyone passed on this kid!!! She is somehow always on base. Like through three games I’m pretty sure her OBP is 1.000. Great! Also a huge asset with her pitching and her glove. Eager to learn but keeps it cool on the field without getting frustrated. I love it.

Lindsey: This kid is all over the place but is so energetic and I love that! Need to work on that attitude sometimes, but I can tell she’s enjoying herself and she feels pride in her position. Not having a bad first season. Looking forward to her growth as a player and I’m glad to have her goofy self and the help of her dad.

Abbey: This kid is always so happy and she’s so small and cute! I didn’t know who the heck she was in the draft, they basically just tossed her to me, but she is a great addition to our team as a catcher. She’s starting to make good contact now that we are playing more games and she never gives me any issues. Also she goes to Thorp which is cool.

Lauren: This is my replacement for the stud. She has not played since she was seven years old and on a baseball team, but is continually making strides as a player. Her pitching today looked good and I love that she is always looking to learn things about the game by asking questions. I needed a first baseman and she was the perfect addition to our team for this reason. She is a leader on the field as well. So excited to see her improve more and more each game!! I’d honestly rather have her on the team than the studdd since she is open with everyone and truly wants to be there.

Chloe: First year and very timid. I drafted her because I liked her family a lot and that is still a good reason to have her. I am going to work with her more so that she gets better and has more confidence. She made me a little heart that says “Thanks for all the help” which is one of the most meaningful things a player has ever given me. 

Briana: Little stud is in her first summer season after fall ball and ran down a ball in center and caught it! I see her being very good as she continues to learn. Great drive, great kid. Hoping to give her some time at second this season.

Katelyn: First year playing, and smaller than her sister which is what slows her down. I love her drive to learn and continue to get better. I am going to work with this kid, like Chloe, to make sure she is able to improve.

Gabrielle: I love having this spark of joy because she has a good arm and a good glove, despite her tiny size. She always has me smiling and having Andy along there with her has been a great relief. He’s awesome and I enjoy his company. Gabs loves softball and as she gets bigger, I look forward to seeing her growth as a player.

Emily: MY SUPERSTAR CAN DO IT ALL! Incredible glove and an even better attitude. How many 12 year olds can switch hit?! She pitches hard, and as long as we keep her from hitting batters, she will be an ace. I want her to learn to work through situations while it is still early in the season, but I would be lost without her. Awesome girl. Unlike the pool pitcher, she is not intimidated by playing with younger girls and serves as a great leader to them and friend.

I love my teams!