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zodiyack · 4 years ago

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Rude! (3,000+ Follower Fic Special 1/3)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Female!Hopper!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, Billy stuff, lyrics, fluff

Song: Rude by Magic!

Words: 1,798

Summary: Billy's love for Hopper's daughter is too strong to be stopped by the tough Chief Jim Hopper. Despite being told "not in a thousand years", he plans to love her regardless.

Note: Thank you so so much! I love you all, and writing your ideas, as well as sharing mine with you, has been so fucking fun and amazing! I'm sorry for my lack of words, I wish being an author came in handy with writing this, however, all I can say is that I love you all from the bottom of my heart. I've seen people do shout-outs, and ask-related stuff with their follower things, and I may do that, I'm not sure. For now, I hope you enjoy this... Thank you all, again!

Also 1/3 means that there will be two other fics released for the 3,000+ follower present!

Taglist: @urie-bowie-mercury, @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @darling-i-read-it, @simonsbluee, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @dpaccione

Masterlist | Stranger Things Masterlist

"Saturday morning, jumped out of bed and put on my best suit. Got in my car and raced like a jet all the way to you. Knocked on your door with my heart in my hands, to ask you a question, 'cause I know that you're an old-fashioned man. Yeah."

Billy was freshly graduated, working as a lifeguard whilst his girlfriend worked her own job, both saving up for their chance to ditch Hawkins and move to California. Sweet Cali. Billy was excited to show the love of his life around the place he called home. Though, physically, he left the salty ocean and windy beach behind, the place never truly left him.

You could see it in his eyes. The waves crashing in his blue orbs. He swore the scent had just barely clung to his belongings; the smell of the tangy air that followed a majority of the state. Working at a pool was the closest he got to the memory of California. Chlorine was most certainly not the salted ocean waters, but with the circumstances, he decided it'd do.

The way his face lit up whenever he talked about his home...it made Y/n more and more excited to see it. His girlfriend had grown up in Hawkins, stayed there her whole life. Never once did the Hoppers leave Hawkins.

But the second that was introduced to Billy, he knew it had to change.

Although they were saving for a big move, Billy had...other things in mind with what to do with his first large pay-check (or series, rather. Working as a lifeguard didn't pay well with just one check). He began to work more shifts to make up for the money he'd spent, and one day after calling in for a day off, he decided to put his plan into action.

"Billy, stop messing with the tie."

"It's annoying." Hands slapped away his attempts of adjusting the black silk tie.

"Well it won't stop being annoying if you keep fucking it up."

For the first time in a long time, Neil Hargrove was calm. Not happy, not amused, not pissed off for some unjust reason- just calm. He wasn't wreaking havoc and he wasn't being an asshole to his son. Billy hadn't seen this side of his dad in quite some time, in fact, he thought something important was going on and he was about to fuck it all up. And then, Susan retreated to the living room with a camera and a freshly ironed suit.

"You're not putting me in that."

"And who asked for your opinion?" Neil deflected with a raised brow. One heavy sigh later and Billy was leaving the bathroom, dawning the whole black and white getup.

Susan clasped her hands over her mouth, a tear leaving her eye, "You look so handsome! Just like your dad!"

Billy rolled his eyes, "Great."

However, his careless attitude was swept under the rug when the blue Camaro pulled up to the police station, interrupting a clearly distressed Chief Hopper bickering with his daughter. Billy had to get himself together before stepping out of the car, jaw slack after seeing the beauty he got to call his date.

"Hello Mr-"

"Don't even try play nice with me, Hargrove. She's not going anywhere with you. End of story." Hopper kept his eyes trained on the blond, body tense like a snake preparing to strike it's prey.

Y/n grabbed Billy's arm, slowly directing him to the car, "And in the sequel, we find out I am going with Billy. End of that story."

"There is no 'sequel.' The writer got drunk and lazy." She paused, turning to face her father who stood tall, arms crossed and face unamused.

"So his daughter picked up where her father left off, and then the sequel was published and the two lived happily ever after, the end."

While her dad attempted to search for a line that would better hers and force her to stay, she pushed Billy toward the driver's side and slid into the car as fast as she could, rolling down the window as Billy started it up. "Bye! I'll be back before midnight!"

The two drove off toward the school, leaving behind a trail of dust and very, very, pissed off Hopper.

Prom was better than Billy thought it would be. He didn't want to go at first, but after Max found out and spoke to her mom about it (the little redhead a cupid-in-the-making), Neil pushed him to go (as he was "doing something else besides being a lazy-no-good rebel"). It was then that he called Y/n and asked if she'd be going.

The suit came in handy. Clashing with his rocker aesthetic, he put it back on once more. The once-annoying tie proved to be somewhat okay in the end.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, but the answer is no!"

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude?

With a deep breath, he ran-over the conversation in his head once more. Like a script for an actor, he had thought of every possible outcome and every possible line for him to face it with. He almost chickened out as his fist rose to the door, but it was too late, for his knuckles rapped against it before he realized he was even knocking.

El opened the door, eyes wide when she saw the familiar mullet and button-down. "Papa..." She muttered as she backed away and out of view.

Hopper traded places with her, his lazy expression sobering up instantaneously, replaced with a grumpy scowl. "Hargrove."

"Mr. Hopper, sir."

"What are you doing on my front porch?"

He swallowed roughly, palms sweaty against his sides. "I was wondering if I could talk to you."

"You seem to be doing just that right now, Hargrove." Hop crossed his arms and clenched his jaw.

Well, this was certainly not something Billy had thought of. He was on panic mode internally, attempting to find any response that could save his hide and accomplish what he set out to do. Unfortunately, the word-vomit button seemed to be misplaced under the button labeled "help".

"I'd like to marry your daughter, sir."

Hop's eyes grew just as big in size as El's had when she opened the door. He choked on his own surprise, coughing it off, then glaring at the boy in front of him. "Over my dead body, Hargrove. If that's all, I'd strongly advise you to get off of my fucking porch while you're still alive."

I hate to do this, you leave no choice; can't live without her. Love me or hate me, we will be boys- standing at that alter. And we will fly away, to another galaxy, you know. You know she's in love with me, she will go anywhere I go-

"Billy, he's just stubborn."

"No, no, I don't think he likes me."

Y/n sighed, rubbing her boyfriend's back. He hadn't told her of his proposal plans, only that Hop seemed to have it out for him. "It'll take time, but he'll warm up to you!"

"It's been how many years since he's met me?"

"To be fair, your reputation wasn't doing you any good until now..."

"It's not like that was fucking obvious." He slouched further down in the front seat of his Camaro. To Billy, all hope was lost. If he couldn't get Hopper to give him his blessing, he was sure he'd lose his goddamned mind.

Y/n frowned. Her frown flipped around as an idea popped into her head, her lips finding Billy's knuckles and quirking his attention. "Even if he never likes you, I'm not going anywhere."

Billy laughed softly, "he'll fucking kill me if you go against him."

"Eh, that's only if he can catch us."

"You're out of your fucking mind, Y/n Hopper."

"I know."

The rest of the night was spent in the Camaro, of course, doing one of Billy's favorite pastimes. By the time the sun rose, Billy was sneaking a kiss to a giggling Y/n before dropping from her window in the cabin and running to his car, parked far enough that Hop or El wouldn't notice. He blew her one more kiss, which she pretended to catch, then he broke into a sprint.

Maybe, he thought, just maybe; there was still a chance.

His knuckles hit the door again, shifting on his feet nervously. It swung open to reveal Hopper, an unimpressed look bringing no surprise Billy's way. It was quite expected, honestly.

"What." His tone made it clear he wasn't up for fucking around.

"Mr. Hopper, if you just give me one chance to prove to you that-"

"No, no, no, no, no. Let me make it very clear to you that I want you to have nothing to do with my daughter whatsoever. No marriage, no friendship, I don't even approve of you guys fucking or whatever-"

"We're in a serious relationship, sir. It's nothing like you think it is."

This made Hop laugh. He continued to do so, holding his stomach, until he realized Billy was unamused. "Oh, you're serious?... My answer is still no, Hargrove. My answer will always be no. Go find someone else's daughter's heart to break. You're not hurting mine."

"It's not like-"

Before he could even get the words out, he was met with a door in his face. Turned down, again.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, 'cause the answer's still no!"

Again, again, and again, Billy incessantly pleaded with Hopper. Different tactics were all met with the same answer; rejection.

He held up a sign outside the cabin, only for Hopper to close the curtain and chuckle as he sipped his coffee.

He asked at the door again, only for Hop to threaten to give him a black eye (which was met with "aren't you the sheriff? Isn't that illegal?").

He raced past the police station, Max leaning out the window with another sign, only for Hop to threaten them with holding cells.

He even went as far as to ask Max and El to help, but Hopper had none of that, and sent Max home with a rant full of nos.

However, if Jim Hopper thought any of it would get it into Billy's head that getting his blessing was just not happening- he was as wrong as Nancy when she claimed not to have feelings for Jonathan.

Billy had another plan in mind, and this one was impossible to say no to.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend- but no still means no!"

"Hopper." Billy stood before his desk, interrupting his nice date with a delicious doughnut, and earning a very annoyed glare. "I got Miss Byer's blessing. Aren't you two a thing?"

"You son of a-"

"I got Eleven's too."

"Hargrove, I'm gonna-"

"Before you cuss me out, I think you should know that I've got a stable job, an interview with a mechanic so I have a job when the pool closes for the winter, and I've got a house on the market I'm looking at. I'm devoted to your daughter and she's devoted to me. You may not like me, but I think you're a great dad, better than the one I was unfortunately stuck with. You raised a strong and amazing woman. She's incredible and I admit, she deserves better than me-"

"You don't have to say that twice." Hopper huffed, crossing his arms.

"I know she deserves so much better than me, I'm surprised she's even with me too. But she loves me, and I think you can see that. I love her too. I would never, in a million years, break her heart."

Jim stayed silent for a few minutes. The silence brought uneasiness to Billy, but that was intentional on Hopper's behalf. He finally piped up with a cough, clearing his throat, before his piercing eyes met Billy's blue orbs.

"I'll hold you to that, Hargrove."

Bonus:

(after the wedding)

"What was that about a no?" Billy quipped with his infamous smirk.

"You're lucky I'm sheriff, Hargrove."

Why you gotta be so rude?

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katnissmellarkkk · 3 years ago

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Hmmm I should probably wait another day to post part two of Finnick being there for Everlark / being their friend but I don’t wanna sooo. Here it is 🤗

I see my mother lead in a group of mobile patients, still wearing their hospital nightgowns and robes. Finnick stands among them, looking dazed but gorgeous. In his hands he holds a piece of thin rope, less than a foot in length, too short for even him to fashion into a usable noose. His fingers move rapidly, automatically tying and unraveling various knots as he gazes about. Probably part of his therapy. I cross to him and say, “Hey, Finnick.” He doesn’t seem to notice, so I nudge him to get his attention. “Finnick! How are you doing?”

“Katniss,” he says, gripping my hand. Relieved to see a familiar face, I think.

Finnick, who’s been wandering around the set for a few hours, comes up behind me and says with a hint of his old humor, “They’ll either want to kill you, kiss you, or be you.”

Just as the elevator arrives, Finnick appears in a state of agitation. “Katniss, they won’t let me go! I told them I’m fine, but they won’t even let me ride in the hovercraft!”

I take in Finnick — his bare legs showing between his hospital gown and slippers, his tangle of hair, the half-knotted rope twisted around his fingers, the wild look in his eyes — and know any plea on my part will be useless. Even I don’t think it’s a good idea to bring him. So I smack my hand on my forehead and say, “Oh, I forgot. It’s this stupid concussion. I was supposed to tell you to report to Beetee in Special Weaponry. He’s designed a new trident for you.”

At the word trident, it’s as if the old Finnick surfaces. “Really? What’s it do?”

“I don’t know. But if it’s anything like my bow and arrows, you’re going to love it,” I say. “You’ll need to train with it, though.”

“Right. Of course. I guess I better get down there,” he says.

“Finnick?” I say. “Maybe some pants?”

He looks down at his legs as if noticing his outfit for the first time. Then he whips off his hospital gown, leaving him in just his underwear. “Why? Do you find this”— he strikes a ridiculously provocative pose —“distracting?”

I can’t help laughing because it’s funny, and it’s extra funny because it makes Boggs look so uncomfortable, and I’m happy because Finnick actually sounds like the guy I met at the Quarter Quell.

“I’m only human, Odair.” I get in before the elevator doors close.

At dinner, Finnick brings his tray to my bed so we can watch the newest propo together on television. He was assigned quarters on my old floor, but he has so many mental relapses, he still basically lives in the hospital.

Finnick presses the button on the remote that kills the power. In a minute, people will be here to do damage control on Peeta’s condition and the words that came out of his mouth. I will need to repudiate them. But the truth is, I don’t trust the rebels or Plutarch or Coin. I’m not confident that they tell me the truth. I won’t be able to conceal this. Footsteps are approaching.

Finnick grips me hard by the arms. “We didn’t see it.”

“What?” I ask.

“We didn’t see Peeta. Only the propo on Eight. Then we turned the set off because the images upset you. Got it?” he asks. I nod. “Finish your dinner.”

“This is what they’re doing to you with Annie, isn’t it?” I ask.

“Well, they didn’t arrest her because they thought she’d be a wealth of rebel information,” he says. “They know I’d never have risked telling her anything like that. For her own protection.”

“Oh, Finnick. I’m so sorry,” I say.

“No, I’m sorry. That I didn’t warn you somehow,” he tells me.

Suddenly, a memory surfaces. I’m strapped to my bed, mad with rage and grief after the rescue. Finnick is trying to console me about Peeta. “They’ll figure out he doesn’t know anything pretty fast. And they won’t kill him if they think they can use him against you.”

“You did warn me, though. On the hovercraft. Only when you said they’d use Peeta against me, I thought you meant like bait. To lure me into the Capitol somehow,” I say.

“I shouldn’t have said even that. It was too late for it to be of any help to you. Since I hadn’t warned you before the Quarter Quell, I should’ve shut up about how Snow operates.”

Finnick and I sit for a long time in silence, watching the knots bloom and vanish, before I can ask, “How do you bear it?”

Finnick looks at me in disbelief. “I don’t, Katniss! Obviously, I don’t. I drag myself out of nightmares each morning and find there’s no relief in waking.” Something in my expression stops him. “Better not to give in to it. It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart.”

Well, he must know. I take a deep breath, forcing myself back into one piece.

“The more you can distract yourself, the better,” he says. “First thing tomorrow, we’ll get you your own rope. Until then, take mine.”

The camera pulls back to include Peeta, off to one side in front of a projected map of Panem. He's sitting in an elevated chair, his shoes supported by a metal rung. The foot of his prosthetic leg taps out a strange irregular beat. Beads of sweat have broken through the layer of powder on his upper lip and forehead. But it's the look in his eyes--angry yet unfocused--that frightens me the most.

"He's worse," I whisper. Finnick grasps my hand, to give me an anchor, and I try to hang on.

“You have two hours to get footage showing the damage from the bombing, establish that Thirteen’s military unit remains not only functional but dominant, and, most important, that the Mockingjay is still alive. Any questions?”

“Can we have a coffee?” asks Finnick.

Steaming cups are handed out. I stare distastefully at the shiny black liquid, never having been much of a fan of the stuff, but thinking it might help me stay on my feet.

Finnick sloshes some cream in my cup and reaches into the sugar bowl. “Want a sugar cube?” he asks in his old seductive voice. That’s how we met, with Finnick offering me sugar. Surrounded by horses and chariots, costumed and painted for the crowds, before we were allies. Before I had any idea what made him tick. The memory actually coaxes a smile out of me. “Here, it improves the taste,” he says in his real voice, plunking three cubes in my cup.

Haymitch’s footsteps are still echoing in the outer hall when I fumble my way through the slit in the dividing curtain to find Finnick sprawled out on his stomach, his hands twisted in his pillowcase. Although it’s cowardly — cruel even — to rouse him from the shadowy, muted drug land to stark reality, I go ahead and do it because I can’t stand to face this by myself.

As I explain our situation, his initial agitation mysteriously ebbs. “Don’t you see, Katniss, this will decide things. One way or the other. By the end of the day, they’ll either be dead or with us. It’s . . . it’s more than we could hope for!”

Well, that’s a sunny view of our situation. And yet there’s something calming about the idea that this torment could come to an end.

I want to run, but Finnick’s acting so strange, as if he’s lost the ability to move, so I take his hand and lead him like a small child.

"Oh, Peeta," says Finnick lightly. "Don't make me sorry I restarted your heart." He leads Annie away after giving me a concerned glance.

I'm unaware that my feet are moving to the table until I'm inches from the holograph. My hand reaches in and cups a rapidly blinking green light.

Someone joins me, his body tense. Finnick, of course. Because only a victor would see what I see so immediately. The arena. Laced with pods controlled by Gamemakers. Finnick's fingers caress a steady red glow over a doorway. "Ladies and gentlemen..."

His voice is quiet, but mine rings through the room. "Let the Seventy-sixth Hunger Games begin!"

I laugh. Quickly. Before anyone has time to register what lies beneath the words I have just uttered. Before eyebrows are raised, objections are uttered, two and two are put together, and the solution is that I should be kept as far away from the Capitol as possible. Because an angry, independently thinking victor with a layer of psychological scar tissue too thick to penetrate is maybe the last person you want on your squad.

"I don't even know why you bothered to put Finnick and me through training, Plutarch," I say.

"Yeah, we're already the two best-equipped soldiers you have," Finnick adds cockily.

"Do not think that fact escapes me," he says with an impatient wave. "Now back in line, Soldiers Odair and Everdeen. I have a presentation to finish."

Boggs told Peeta to sleep out in full view where the rest of us could keep an eye on him. He isn't sleeping, though. Instead, he sits with his bag pulled up to his chest, clumsily trying to make knots in a short length of rope. I know it well. It's the one Finnick lent me that night in the bunker. Seeing it in his hands, it's like Finnick's echoing what Haymitch just said, that I've cast off Peeta.

He weaves the rope in and out of his fingers. "The problem is, I can't tell what's real anymore, and what's made up."

The cessation of rhythmic breathing suggests that either people have woken or have never really been asleep at all. I suspect the latter.

Finnick's voice rises from a bundle in the shadows. "Then you should ask, Peeta. That's what Annie does.”

Masks go on. Finnick adjusts Peeta's mask over his lifeless face.

"I just murdered a member of our squad!" shouts Peeta.

"You pushed him off you. You couldn't have known he would trigger the net at that exact spot," says Finnick, trying to calm him.

"Who cares? He's dead, isn't he?" Tears begin to run down Peeta's face. "I didn't know. I've never seen myself like that before. Katniss is right. I'm the monster. I'm the mutt. I'm the one Snow has turned into a weapon!"

“It's not your fault, Peeta," says Finnick.

I shout a warning to the others to stay with me. I plan for us to skirt around the corner and then detonate the Meat Grinder, but another unmarked pod lies in wait.

It happens silently. I would miss it entirely if Finnick didn't pull me to a stop. "Katniss!"

#thg #hunger games #the hunger games #katniss everdeen #Finnick Odair #mockingjay #bookcomb ♥️🔎

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wrestlezon · 3 years ago

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liveblog containment zone for aew dynamite 8/3/22

i wasnt going to do this, i was just gonna casually sit back and watch but then the undisputed elite promo started and i decided to get invested today

best friends trenchcoat bit good. just as janky as it went in pwg lmao. i love them when chuck came out to save orange-- he has a sleeveless tiedye shirt?? GUNS OUT??? love lookin at your arms king keep up the good work HELL yea (insert further wolf barking and catcalls here)

ricky starks video bit-- i wonder how powerhouse hobbs is going to justify his turn

oh its adam cole? we doing this now? ok. i thought i'd see hobbs are these dang dudes finally going to arrive at the firework factory lots of talking. ive been waiting for this whole thing to blow up in adam cole's face forever (in true heel fashion) hmm... they wouldnt have kenny omega come back yet right... wowww youre just going to force them not to fight? lmao?? who made you the boss WHOAAAAA he finally did it!!! he played his hand!!! who is going to save them <:( THE POP FOR HANGMAN!!!!!!! ohhhhhhhhh the pickup...

oh its christian cage... lmao you can hear the crowd laughing "HE BROUGHT UP MY PERSONAL LIFE I WOULD NEVER DO THAT" ok LMFAO christian cage is so fucking funny HOLY SHIT THAT CAR WAS MOVING FAST

hello??? britt baker team vs thunderstorm!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW wasnt expecting this ooooohhhhh new outfit jamie hayter?? fancy rebel reminds me of xena warrior princess... maybe its the hair holy shit that thunder rosa kick from outta nowhere looked like it hurt whoa!!! hayter and baker won with the pin on toni storm

sammy tay marriage? ok i guess. cringe EDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! eddie is the realest. ultimate face. i agree with everything he is saying SO TRUE BOO THIS WEDDING eddie may have lost the cagematch (i didnt like that result) but he does get on all the ppvs

TEAM TAZ IS OVER.... GOLLY... lmao makes sense tho. poor taz. he is just like literally if idk whats going on in my own team then i just WONT HAVE ONE. TEAM OVER. DISBAND powerhouse hobbs match its starks! he practically teleported past the camera going so fast LMAO omg he was also obscured by smoke and fog and im blind

oh!!!!!!! miro video promo MIRO ARE YOU GOING TO GET AN EVIL BAD GUY EYE TOO...

commercial

oh its darby allin doing a video promo against brody king hes giving himself a tat and the buzzing is quite annoying and distracting

jim ross alert

oh! its the christian cage match. who is he fighting again oh!!!!!!!!! matt hardy!!!!! matt hardy and his penance mullet im distracted thinking about all the laundry i have to do. but i am appreciating this match between two ogs table! table! table! table! ohhhh!! dodged and a win by christian cage strangely normal win for evil badguy cage wait i spoke too soon hes breaking out the steel chairs huh! LUCHASAURUS....... BY HIMSELF???? I FEAR... oh!!!!!!!!!! distraction fakeout for jungleboy! LMAO HIS SHIRT? IN LIKE DEFAULT ARIAL? LOWERCASE IMPACT FONT???

Christian is a pussy.

hey its daniel garcia doing a backstage promo

kip sabian return?? shall he come back and fight pac???

ethan page is wearing an excellent shirt today. he is so fashionable ethan page bitching and moaning in the ring promo stokely!!!! stokely TAKE ETHAN PAGE AWAY FROM DAN LAMBERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!! YESSSS ETHAN PAGE LEAVE THE AMERICAN TOP TEAM PLEASE YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh boy! and now its 2point0 backstage promo time!!! hell yes DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT GETS DADDY MAGIC'S NIPPLES HARD ok i love anna jay's insatiable need to choke someone out. she needs her fix stu grayson isnt around anymore so now she is just choking out whoever whenever

oh its the acclaimed vs gunn club dumpster match now!! LMAO NICE off to a great start with the trash cans oh and we get a rap too? max caster is spicy today wow in the dumpster already that was fast is austin gunn wearing a croptop and overalls is someone gonna pop out of the dumpster on the ramp... maybe not. but itd be a good hiding spot oh on top of the tunnel? buddy.... caster!! OFF THE TUNNEL ONTO A TABLE... GOLLY omg ziptied. theyre locked in now lol wait are they gonna just roll the dumpster out now. kidnapping? OH... WHOA JEEZ

matches were announced! waow

its wheeler yuta vs jericho time! who will win!? i honestly dont know. i'd want yuta to win but i think jericho would end up winning regardless... through bluster or shenanigans EJECTED lmao the crowd pulling off the whole goodbye song??? nice there is wrestling occuring. and also slap fights i love that yuta's thing is his insane german suplexes. its always cool and charming to have a Signature Favorite Move oh no! walls of jericho!!!! THE YUTA CHANTS FROM THE CROWD!!!!!!!!! yuta DOUBLE TOPE???? TRIPLE??? YUTA CONTAIN YOURSELF oh no!!!!!!!!! yuta codebreakered! KICK OUT... wait i looked at the clock and spoilered myself. i can rest easy for a few more minutes the bat! THE DISTRACTION!! NOT HIS DICK AND BALLS SEATBELT AGAIN????? nooooo!!! submission held!!!! yuta tapped....

killing him!!! moxley to da rescue

#livezon

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canary3d-obsessed · 4 years ago

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Restless Rewatch: Nirvana in Fire, Episode 02

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Stuff)

Warning: Spoilers for All 54 Episodes!

A Cunning Plan

Let's start by checking in with the in-progress schemes. Nirvana in Fire features many, many overlapping schemes that stretch across multiple episodes.

Princess Nihuang's Marriage: Princess Nihuang is betrothed to a dead guy, and that's fine with her. If she needs tender emotional care she's got Xia Dong. Xia Dong is married to a dead guy so this works well for both of them.

The Emperor wants to marry Nihuang off, because she's got a loyal heap of troops at the southern border, and he's a paranoid old fuck, who doesn't like anyone to have the power to overthrow him. Marrying her will sort of force her to hand her troops off to her impulsive younger brother, or something.

The Emperor has a soft spot for Nihuang, however, so he's allowed her to set a bunch of impossible conditions on the marriage, including a martial arts contest. NIF is a hybrid palace drama and Wuxia drama, so there are courtesans and backstabbing and sneaky maids and sneaky eunuchs but also, people can fly.

The two main power seekers, Prince Yu and the Crown Prince, have flunkies that they want Nihuang to marry, but their flunkies suck at martial arts, so if they want her to marry one of their dudes, there will have to be cheating.

Note that Nihuang's good friends Jingrui and Yujin are taking part in the contest to marry her, which might be weird, except they both know she can beat their asses so they seem to just be joining in for fun & prestige.

The fact that she doesn't want to marry either of these loveable cuties means that she's pretty serious about staying betrothed to her first love, despite his apparent deadness.

(more after the cut!)

Recruiting Mei Changsu / Killing Mei Changsu: Team Prince Yu wants to recruit Mei Changsu. Team Crown Prince wants to recruit him or kill him, if recruiting him doesn't work.

Mei Changsu acts like this is so tedious; all he wants to do is rest. But they only want to recruit him because he and his pal Lin Chen made them believe he is the answer to their problems. Whenever Mei Changsu acts annoyed at something, it's probably something he actually orchestrated. "Pork chops again?" (secretly buys more pork chops).

The Duke Qing/ Landgrab Case: In Episode 1, the Jiangzuo Alliance protected some witnesses against Duke Qing in an enslavement/land grabbing case. It's difficult for me to find anything about historical land grabbing in China because Google is full of 21st century land grabbing information. Anyway Duke Qing works for Prince Yu, so the witnesses are (whether they mean to be or not) on The Crown Prince's side. The Emperor has an interest in this case, because land grabbing is bad, apparently, even by corrupt-emperor standards. Xia Dong is in charge of investigating.

The Chiyan Army Case: This is the big conspiracy that the entire show is about. 11 years ago, the Emperor received evidence that Prince Qi, Lin Xie (Mei Changsu's father), and the entire Chiyan army were going to rebel. This was supposedly reported by Xia Dong's husband, Nie Feng, before Lin Xie supposedly killed him. The emperor ordered executions for everybody.

Prince Jing thought this was a bunch of bullshit and didn't hesitate to say so, which got him sent off to distant regions to do army things for years at a time, and landed him a place high up on the emperor’s shit list.

The Hazelnut Pastry Scheme: This is a small scale, benevolent scheme, in which Concubine Jing will eventually stop making cookies with hazelnuts in them, because Mei Changsu is allergic to them.

Ok, that’s the scheme roundup for this episode. On with the show!

Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting

After a quick expository chat between the Emperor and Gong Gao, laying out the reasons for the Nihuang Marriage Scheme, we go to Prince Yu’s place to watch superhot Meng Zhi, commander of the emperor's guards, whip some ass. Not, alas, literally. Despite his leather shoulder thingies and his handsome beard, and his commanding ways on a battlefield, when it comes to interpersonal relations he is pretty much a labrador retriever puppy in human form.

Meng Zhi is kicking the asses of Prince Yu’s fighters to determine if they're qualified to compete in the Marriage contest. They are not. He points out to the Prince that they can't put such terrible wimps into the competition because it will make the country’s defenses look weak.

This beatdown is observed by Prince Yu and by Xie Yu, who Prince Yu thinks is on his side. Xie is 100% on the Crown Prince's side, but is carefully hiding that fact; he has his son working for Prince Yu as part of his cover.

In determining how severe an ass kicking is, everyone talks about how many moves it takes to defeat someone, like it's chess. Meng Zhi can beat literally anyone else in the show. He's number two on the Langya List of fighters & we never meet #1.

Fe Liu Was Fast as Lightning

Mei Changsu is hanging out in the garden at Xie manor while Fe Liu jumps around. Fe Liu wants Mei Changsu to play Roblox with him, and pouts when MCS opts for staying in the garden and reading a book.

Fe Liu is utterly devoted to Mei Changsu; I really love their relationship. Fe Liu’s backstory isn't fully explained in the show, but apparently he was raised from an early age to focus on being extremely lethal, and didn't spend much time learning to talk or other skills, making him the epitome of the asynchronous/ gifted teen. Mei Changsu isn’t who raised him to be like this; MCS and Lin Chen rescued him, which is why he is now Mei Changsu’s personal murder pet.

Fe Liu is both a complete fantasy character and also a really believable teen, beautifully acted by Leo Wu, who DMBJ fans know from Tomb of the Sea, and who Xiao Zhan fans know from Battle Through the Heavens.

Fe Lui promptly gets into a fight with Meng Zhi, who's visiting Xie manor. All Fe Liu was doing was leaping about the rooftops like an assassin, but since Xie Yu is the sort of guy that a lot of people would like to kill, Meng Zhi doesn't think this is so good. They have a hilarious, entertaining fight with many, many wire-assisted moves.

They're pretty evenly matched, and Xie Yu watches them with extreme interest until Mei Changsu shows up and tells Fe Liu to stop. Xie Yu is watching because he needs to know how many dudes he should send to assassinate Mei Changsu. Answer: more. Always more.

Unfortunately, (or fortunately since it’s probably all part of MCS’s plan) Fe Liu's extreme skilz make it obvious that his boss is someone important. Mei Changsu discusses this with Jingrui and Yujin in an open-air setting where Jingrui's brother Xie Bi can totally hear them. In no time flat, father and son have reported his identity to their respective princes.

Over at Prince Yu's place, Qin Banruo and her awesome eye makeup join the party. She's Prince Yu’s advisor/manipulator, working for the (fallen) Hua kingdom, led by the (deceased) Princess Xuanji . She has a network of spies who work for her, that she deploys for Prince Yu's schemes. Her ultimate goal is not to help him, however, but just to fuck up the Da Liang Empire, which conquered the Hua.

(Nearly) Everybody Hates Jingyan

Xia Dong heads out on her assignment in the Land Grab Case, and Nihuang goes to see her off. They talk about gender expectations and how annoying it is to have to marry a dude, and briefly hang out being WLW goals with their mutual devotion, excellent fashion sense and deadly fighting abilities. Nihuang, in particular, wears the prettiest things and also stands at attention like she's commanding an army; I adore her.

They're interrupted by the arrival of Prince Jing, who is greeted cheerfully by Nihuang and eye-rollingly by Xia Dong.

He's wearing an awesome brass-and-blue armor that we never see again after this episode. It's too bad - it's a good color for him and it has a cool vampire cloak with a high collar.

Prince Jing takes the opportunity to snark at Xia Dong about her investigation and the Xuanjing Bureau’s penchant for inventing finding conspiracies, and then rides off before she can reply.

This leads Nihuang and Xia Dong to get into their chronic argument about the Chiyan Conspiracy and the Lin family, and then Xia Dong hits the road.

Prince Jing and his subordinates stand around outside the palace waiting to report to the emperor while the emperor ignores him. They get sweatier and sweatier while they wait. which makes me like the Emperor a little bit more.

Prince Yu and CP Xian are busy sucking up to the emperor as they look at a manuscript. They are a bunch of assholes and you can see that Gao Zhan isn't a fan of this bullshit.

Eventually Gao Zhan reminds/persuades the emperor to summon Prince Jing, whose brothers snark at him like a couple of 12 year old girls while he radiates manly vigor and handsomeness.

Consort Jin is bummed that she can't see Prince Jing for another 5 days, and her maid sidekick says random comforting things. This maid, Xiao Xin, is actually a little snake, who works for Qin Banruo's network. We don't learn that until sometime later.

All of the maids have this same hairstyle. If you are a westerner and you think this hairstyle is crazy, have a look at some Roman and Byzantine historic hairstyles. I'm not saying this hairstyle is NOT crazy, mind you; just that crazy hair was a feature of many, many historical empires.

Consort Jing has someone deliver her hazelnut cookies to Prince Jing; she doesn’t know about Mei Changsu yet so hazelnut is still on the menu. Nicest mom. Also smartest, helpful-est mom, as the story develops.

Suck-Up Contest

At Xie manor, Xie Bi tries to get Mei Changsu to go meet the Empress, who has stopped by with Nihuang specifically to meet him, as part of the Recruit Mei Changsu scheme. Jingrui says nope, fuck that, he's not going to be a pawn in your political games, fuck off. We get to see Jingrui being steely and righteous, which is both cool and hot. Nihuang should totally marry him.

The Empress is annoyed that Mei Changsu doesn't show up, and Nihuang is like, it's ok, I don’t actually give a fuck about meeting new men. But I did want to meet his murder puppy Fe Liu.

Grand Princess Liyang says they don’t need to bother meeting pugilists, despite her son being one and her supposed best friends/co-parents also being pugilists.

Grand Princess Liyang will probably be glad Mei Changsu didn’t come to her little party, once she realizes what tends to happen when Mei Changsu comes to a party.

Then we go to the suitor tournament, in which everyone more or less sucks.

The princes really want to go over to Mei Changsu’s balcony to meet him, and they have a hilarious silent interaction where they both try not to be the first one to move. They finally cave, and go together.

Then they compete to see who can be the most cringe and blow the most smoke up Mei Changsu's ass.

They ply him with gifts and flattery, which he mostly manages to resist.

Cookie Time with Granny

Then they get summoned to go meet the grand empress, who is (I think) the mother of the previous emperor, the grandmother of the current emperor, and the great grandmother of basically every highborn character of the current generation, including Nihuang and Yujin, although it’s not clear where they sit in the family tree. Historically, cousin marriage - particularly of maternal cousins - was no big whoop in China, so it's not surprising that a lot of nobles would share a great-grandmother.

The Grand Empress is a sweet lady with dementia. She can’t figure out who the hell anyone is. First-time viewers feel the same way.

Her dementia is pretty well depicted, unlike a lot of TV dementia, or at least it matches up to my experiences with my own elders. She remembers the distant past more vividly than recent times; when she understands who’s in front of her she connects with them emotionally, but she falls off track easily. And she projects the identities of people she misses onto people who are around her.

Like many other grannies, no matter who is visiting, she wants them to 1. get married 2. produce offspring 3. eat something, you’re so skinny

When Mei Changsu meets Granny she immediately calls him Lin Shu, either because she recognizes him or because she really misses Lin Shu, or both. She calls Nihuang over and joins their hands, and Mei Changsu grabs onto Nihuang's hand and holds it for a while.

Everyone thinks it's adorable that Granny has dementia and is confused about that guy who was horribly killed, except Nihuang, who was already checking Mei Changsu out and is somewhat verklempt. She might have to revise her anti-man feelings a little bit.

Everyone leaves, and Nihuang hits up Mei Changsu to take a walk with her, casually mentioning that she could have his hand cut off for touching her, but since she's not in the mood, he's ok.

She prods a bit to find out what he's doing in town and what he's up to. “Do you have a girlfriend? Like a serious girlfriend or just a stalker who works for you?” She asks him which of the two princes he's going to support, but they’re interrupted by a eunuch beating a slave child. That’s the price you pay for trying to have a date in the palace, I guess.

#nirvana in fire #langya bang #nirvana in fire gifs #restless rewatch nirvana in fire #canary3d-original #my gifs

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one-boring-person · 4 years ago

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Like Football.

John Rambo (Rambo III) x reader

Warnings: heavy violence, injury, gun use, death, blood, violence involving animals (horses), bad language, SPOILERS

Context: John and the reader take part in the horse game in the small village, before all hell breaks loose.

A/N: I love this character far too much to not write anything, and this scene in the movie is definitely one of my favourites (before all the bombing ofc) so enjoy😅 there will most definitely be more Rambo stuff in the future!

Masterlist

"I'll play." Mousa looks at John in surprise as the veteran reaches out to take the reins of a nearby horse, pulling the animal gently towards him. Beside him, I have to fight to hide my smirk, knowing John has never been one to decline a challenge like this.

"What're the rules?" He asks our guide, looking back at him as he eyes up the field of play, watching as the other men on horses race back and forth, getting ready for another round.

"You have to get the sheep and take it round. Then drop it in the circle, on the ground." Mousa explains, gesturing to the white ring chalked into the ground a little way away.

"Why?" I butt in, already looking out for a mount of my own.

"Because there is a circle on the ground." The guide replies, appearing a little confused.

"Hm. Just like football." John responds, before swiftly climbing into the saddle and wheeling around to join in with the men.

Lifting a brow at his eagerness, I quickly locate an available horse, going over to the person holding the reins.

"Can I borrow him?" I ask politely, gesturing to the horse.

"Her. And No, women cannot play." The man frowns, looking me up and down.

"Aw, come on. Won't it be fun to watch me fall?" I roll my eyes, playing right into his old-fashioned views.

He hesitates, but eventually hands me the reins, watching sceptically as the mare follows me. Smiling sweetly at him, I take the horse a little way away, before swinging myself up into the saddle, feeling a rising sense of excitement at the familiar feeling of riding. Taking up the reins, I gently nudge the horse's sides and trot quickly over to the other riders, pulling up in the bustling crowd of rebels, just catching sight of John a little way ahead of me. Grinning to myself, I let the mare shift on the spot, her hooves pawing at the ground in anticipation, my grip on the reins loose so as not to restrict her too much, my eyes fixed on the lone rider at the opposite end of the playing field. I sit forwards slightly, legs ready to urge the horse on as the sheep's body is brandished to us, before being dropped to the floor.

Instantly, the riders around me kick their horses into action, each and every one springing forwards with a whinny, my own mare lurching into a fast canter. Exhilaration floods me as the animal moves with the crowd, my body moving in time with her as she starts pushing up against other horses, my legs knocking against the flanks of others, elbows jabbing at me. Determined, I lean forwards in the saddle, leaning over her neck as we overtake a good few of the other men, the reins cutting into my palms as I pull her to the side to ride in time with the veering group, the sheep now held aloft by some other man. Underneath me, the mare snorts, hooves pounding the sandy ground harshly as she rides up alongside the men who are currently fighting over the prize.

A familiar grunt of exertion draws my attention momentarily to the side, where I notice John has pulled his horse up beside mine, the veteran's gaze fixed on the dangling body of the black sheep. Smirking, I dig my heels into the flanks of the mare, urging her on with a sharp sound, to which she instantly renews her speed, easily drawing up beside the current winners. The crowd is thicker here, horses crashing into me frequently, arms and legs hitting me almost painfully as the men fight over the sheep, shouting at each other in their own language, leaving me to call out to no one in particular.

By now, however, the sheep is in reaching distance for me. Taking my feet out of the stirrups, I lean out, batting a few others out of the way as I take hold of the limp body, yanking harshly on it, pulling it from its current owner. Grinning triumphantly, I swing it out of reach, goading the mare on as she tears away from the group, a few of the faster horses running just ahead of me, some of the riders behind falling as their own mounts trip, squealing as they drop to the dust. Instantly, however, I feel riders pressing up alongside me, their hands grabbing at me as they try to wrestle the sheep from my grip, the mare suddenly rearing as a particular man yanks on her bridle.

Yelping, I can only drop the sheep and cling onto the neck of the panicking horse as she kicks out, trying to throw me off. Jeers and shouts of triumph surround me as another guy picks up the sheep, horses steaming past us as they continue the chase. After a moment, the mare drops back down, bucking gently as she calms down, only for me to make use of her excitement by digging my heels into her flank. Swiftly, she leaps forwards, racing to catch up with the other riders, where I can see John and another guy fighting for the sheep, the latter yanking on it roughly.

We are quick to catch up again, the mare darting in alongside the leaders again, jerking aside when one of the riders suddenly falls to the floor, collapsing in the dust. Too late, I realise it's John, the dark-haired veteran rolling into a ball to avoid being hit, only to swiftly scramble back upright again grabbing the fallen sheep and holding it to his chest. Other riders swarm him, grabbing and pulling at him, managing to retrieve the sheep as John gives up and finds his horse again, throwing himself into the saddle once more. Grinning at his competitive streak, I urge the mare up beside him, pushing against his horse as he finally realises I'm playing, too, his dark eyes widening slightly at the sight of me, a rare smile gracing his features momentarily. It's at that point that he sees the sheep on the floor again, having been dropped by someone else.

Leaning out of the saddle, he scoops it up, holding it to his chest protectively, out of the reach of the other men. Chuckling, I reach over and take hold of the prize, pulling it between us as our shoulders press together from the proximity, neither of us willing to give up. Riding side-by-side, the two of us make our way further down the field, other riders catching up but unable to grab the sheep, leaving us mostly to fight it out amongst ourselves. Smirking, I lean across properly, having taken my feet from the stirrups again, hooking my shoulder under his arm and pushing upwards, throwing him off balance as he fights to remain in control of his horse. With our skin pressed flushed together, I can feel a light blush dusting my cheeks, but I choose to focus instead on the knowledge I've almost won the game.

An explosion somewhere to the north of the valley interrupts us, drawing our attention away from the game. Brilliant orange flames engulf a large area of the land a little way away, smoke roiling up from the fire, concealing the attacker from us momentarily.

As soon as it clears slightly, the silhouettes of two Russian gunships loom into view, headed straight for the tiny village. Around us, people start to scream, men and women running here and there as they start to escape, riders on horses wheeling around to get back to safety. The sheep is forgotten, John and I simply doing as everyone else is, urging our horses on away from the approaching danger.

Explosions erupt all around us, gunfire pelting the ground as the pilots let loose, gunning down anything that moves. Cries of pain and panic fill the air, almost lost to the sound of collapsing structures and exploding missiles, the stench of burning flesh, spilt blood and charred wood quickly creating a heady miasma in the dry air. Beneath me, the mare squeals in terror, movements uncoordinated now as she goes to bolt, racing away from the helicopters as they descend on us, John only just managing to keep up on his own horse.

A sudden explosion beside me catches the horse off-guard and she goes down, screaming in pain, throwing me off onto the solid ground. My shoulder collides harshly with the rock, drawing a grunt from me as I am forced to roll away from the blazing flames, watching in dismay as the horse staggers to its feet and limps off, clearly injured beyond repair, leaving me alone on the floor.

Gritting my teeth, I force myself to my feet, using the smoke as cover as I duck towards a nearby structure, hiding down inside it as I wait for some clarity. My arm smarts from where it's been hit, but I ignore it, keeping my eyes trained on the hovering gunships, hatred and anger flooding me as I watch them shoot down hordes and hordes of young children and women, men and other fighters crumpling with screams of pain as the bullets tear through them. I can no longer see John, my heart skipping a beat at the thought.

Steeling myself, I look around for a solution, catching sight of a turret nearby, where a rebel has already been shot to his death, the artillery left unharmed, surprisingly. Glancing around, I deem it safe enough to move, keeping low as I sprint over to the weapon, hoping that the pilots haven't seen me yet, knowing that I can try and take one down if I can get to the turret. The going is slow, the ground having been torn up by the many bombs and gunfire, meaning I trip and stumble over almost every unseen disfigurement in the ground, my legs pumping hard to keep going. Adrenaline races through my veins, each breath coming hard and fast as I finally reach my destination, swinging myself up into position.

As I do so, I feel someone else hop up behind me, my instincts telling me to be ready as I spin on my heels, hand going to grab my knife from my belt as I expect to meet an enemy. Instead, my eyes make contact with John's, the veteran grabbing my wrist gently as he reaches past me to take hold of the artillery gun, clearly having had the same idea as me. Stepping back slightly, I let him take the turret, noticing an automatic rifle on the floor from where the rebel dropped it. I take it up and check the magazine, glad to find it still mostly full. Cocking it, I take aim and fire at the rapidly approaching gunship, joining John as he supplies a steady volley of bullets at the looming aircraft.

Thankfully, it isn't long before the helicopter goes up in flames, the ruined skeleton falling in a ball of flames to the ground, leaving nothing but debris behind. Checking my gun, I throw it aside a I realise it has no ammo left, joining John in scoping out the next threat.

Relief floods me as I notice that it is retreating back into the mountains, leaving piles of ruin behind, bodies littering the landscape as flames slowly go out, allowing us to see the true extent of the attack.

"Jesus Christ." I mutter, looking out over the remains.

"Ain't much of him 'round here." John replies grimly, eyeing me up and down critically, "You hurt?"

"Me? No. You?"

"Nah."

We hold eye contact for a few moments longer, before he suddenly reaches out and pulls me into his side, initiating an awkward half-hug. Surprised but pleasantly so, I wrap my arm around his waist, feeling his muscles tense under the thin fabric of his shirt as he squeezes my body gently. I smile up at him, glad when he returns the gesture, enjoying this softer side of him, even though I reckon I'll never see it again.

"Come on, Trautman needs us." I finally mumble, not wanting to let go but understanding the need to do so.

"Yeah, guess so."

#rambo iii #rambo #John Rambo #John Rambo x reader #John Rambo imagine #rambo imagine #sylvester stallone

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karlnapity · 4 years ago

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God Bless This Perfect Shitstorm:

Chapter 1: It’s not a problem if I never get caught.

(tws: alcoholism/addiction, serious self-deprecation)

Schlatt hadn’t realized how fucking boring being sober was.

And hell, it’s not like he can even call it sober yet. It hasn’t even been twelve hours, and damn, he can still feel the alcohol in his veins, the last few drops making their way painstakingly out of his system.

It had been a bit of a snap decision, a promise to Quackity when he’d been the furthest thing from even trying to be sober, but damn, Quackity had decided to hold him to it.

He’d practically busted down the door, waking Schlatt from what might be the last good sleep he gets for a while, if the jittery feeling is anything to go by, and had told him, “This is the day.”

Fuck, man, he hadn’t even remembered making the promise.

But it’s boring. The only thing getting him up in the morning is a sip, or a shot if he’s feeling like making particularly bad decisions. Depending on the strength of the liquor, that can get him through the first hour or two, or at least until the end of the first meeting. Then lunch, plenty more booze, and if he’s lucky he’s completely wasted by afternoon. Fucking obviously he can’t pass out until at least the end of the day, but sure, no harm in being a bit out of it for the last few hours. The cabinet can handle whatever the fuck.

Not much time for being bored in the middle of that, but what the hell is he supposed to do now?

Quackity’s dragging him to Niki's bakery. he’d been horrified to hear Schlatt didn’t eat breakfast, though Schlatt doesn’t really get the big deal of it all.

His head’s pounding already, a hangover that would usually be remedied by now. He’d forgotten how stupidly fucking painful they were.

(It could be solved real easily.)

Quackity’s chattering about something or other, so thrilled about the coming day, but Schlatt’s not fooled, doesn’t miss the way Quackity’s so obviously trying to distract him from the way he’s already gritting his teeth.

Niki’s surprised to see them, but she’s courteous enough as Quackity oohs and aahs even as he comes here every fucking day.

Schlatt lets him pick. His stomach’s already roiling anyways, rebelling against the lack of liquor and at the smells of baking bread. He feels sick.

He doesn’t say anything. It’s a bit of a bitch move to feel so shit already, and as much as he thinks this is a stupid fucking idea, he’s not gonna ruin Quackity’s fun.

They leave, Quackity calling a goodbye over his shoulder and Schlatt trying to resist the urge to throw up in the flowers, and make their way to the White House.

(He wouldn’t feel this sick if he just had a little. Just a little.)

They’re early, hours earlier than Schlatt usually arrives, and they’re the first. Quackity grins and invites him to sit on one of the chairs. He wonders whether he can sneak away, and inwardly chides himself on it. No pussy shit today, no hiding away and taking a shot or two, even as his heart soars at the mere fucking thought.

He sits.

“How’re you feeling so far?” Quackity asks, taking a bite of his pastry, and Schlatt cringes at the genuine concern on his face. “Not looking too good.”

Schlatt waves his hand. “I’ll be fine. Just gotta soldier through.”

Quackity’s face pinches. “Tell me the truth, ok? I know you’re all about this cold turkey thing, but let me know how you’re feeling. We gotta make sure nothing serious happens.”

“Yeah. Whatever.” He resists the urge to snap at him, and instead grabs a pastry and takes a firm bite.

At this point he’s usually tipsy at the very least. He’s a lot worse at conversation than he thought, and Quackity doesn’t seem quite sure what to think either. He can’t quite sit still, bouncing his leg idly and pulling at the tie around his neck.

(This would be a lot fucking easier if he was drunk.)

The others start to pile in soon enough. Fundy’s first, obviously trying to hide his surprise that Schlatt’s in the common area and not already holed away in his office already.

(There’s a cabinet in his office calling his name.)

Tubbo’s next, taking a pastry with a grin and sitting beside them. He makes easy conversation with Quackity, and Schlatt tips his head back on the couch and lets himself relax for a minute.

It doesn’t last long, the pounding and the jitters and the fact he still can’t stay still wreaking havoc on his body. He feels like he can’t quite think straight, things not right, not the way they’re supposed to be.

“Schlatt?” that’s Quackity. He sits up and the whole room spins, and goddamn does he feel like throwing up. He steadies himself, and his eyes focus on the man in front of him.

Quackity raises his eyebrows. “you ok?”

Tubbo is staring at him with wide eyes. He wants to yell at him to take a fucking picture. He doesn’t. He really wants to.

He shakes his head. “Yeah, fine. What, am I not allowed to relax?”

He wants to tell Quackity he’ll get a wrinkle between his eyebrows if he doesn’t stop frowning. Is he still fucking drunk?

Tubbo leaves not soon after. He has no fucking clue what the two of them were talking about.

(If he was drunk he wouldn’t care.)

“Alright, big guy,” Quackity says, the nickname he usually only uses when Schlatt’s so out of it he can’t even move. “What’s for today?”

He has the sudden, distinct urge that he wants to cry, which is odd, because he can’t remember when that last was. He hates this.

He puts his head in his hands, and the couch dips as Quackity sits next to him, rests a hand on his shoulder. He wants to pull away, he doesn’t like to be touched, but he’s so fucking exhausted he doesn’t.

He’s not quite bored anymore.

“Want to go to your office?” Quackity asks quietly, and it’s probably because he wants him out of the public eye, because Schlatt prizes his privacy and Quackity knows that.

But he can see it. he can see it, because he has a real nice bourbon in there and wine he doesn’t drink because it doesn’t get him there fast enough and vodka he’s been meaning to finish and some whiskey he bought just because it was fucking expensive even if it tastes like shit, and he wants it so fucking badly, he doesn’t care what it is, he just wants to stop feeling this way and his entire body fucking craves it and he feels like he’s dying.

His hands are shaking so badly, and he’s pretty sure Quackity’s calling his name but he can’t focus on anything except how badly he just wants it all.

He doesn’t want to be sober anymore, he really, really doesn’t. This was a stupid idea, and Quackity’s a fucking asshole to even suggest it, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to make it, and he can’t, so what’s even the fucking point.

"Yeah,” he says. “Yeah, let’s do the office.”

Quackity, or someone, removed the stock he had on display, and even in the main cabinet, but they didn’t check everywhere.

Addicts are fucking smart, and they should’ve known to look elsewhere. It’s something he learned back when he was still doing the pill shit, but he’s kept it with him.

His hands are shaking so badly it’s hard to pick up much of anything, and he’s reached the fucking disgusting sweating part of it. He’s only reached this stage a few times before, when he was so fucking poor he couldn’t even afford cheap vodka, and it brings up a few memories he really, really doesn’t want to remember.

But he’s got a small bottle of whiskey hidden behind a few books, and it has never, ever looked so appealing, even if it’s the cheap shit.

It’s gone in only a few minutes.

Quackity’s gonna be fucking pissed, they all are, but he genuinely could not give a shit. They shouldn’t have left him alone if they didn’t want this.

It’s their fault.

Quackity’s more than pissed. Schlatt had just barely gotten to sleep again, head down on his desk like most nights these days, and he wakes up to the sound of glass shattering.

“Are you fucking serious?” Quackity’s yelling, and he’s pretty sure he can hear the sound of Tubbo trying to placate him, but he’s not sure.

The whiskey wasn’t enough. What time is it? He’s usually passing out at this point. His head hurts.

“Oh, good, he’s awake,” Quackity exclaims, storming into the room. “Finally awake, asshole? What the fuck? I thought you were on board.”

Schlatt resists the urge to put his head back on the desk. “Can you keep your voice down?”

Quackity’s face contorts in a grimace. “I don’t know why I even fucking try. You’re impossible.”

“There’s no point.” Schlatt waves a hand, spinning a bit in his chair. “There was no fucking way it was gonna work. You just gotta accept the facts.”

Tubbo frowns. “You hardly tried, though.”

“I fucking tried,” He sneers, putting a hand on the desk, hard. “You realize how much I fucking drink in a day? That bottle you just threw out? That’s fucking breakfast. Don’t tell me I wasn’t trying. You don’t know how it works, you don’t know how hard it is, how much it hurts.”

For the second time that day, he feels tears prick his eyes, and this time he can’t stop it.

He was always an angry crier.

Quackity crumples like a doll into one of the chairs, puts his head in his hands in a similar fashion to Schlatt, earlier.

“I’m sorry,” he says into his hands. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I get it. Maybe not with alcohol, but you know how I used to be. I know how it is for people not to be understanding, and I’m sorry I put you in that situation.

I’m genuinely trying to help, Schlatt. I care about you. I know how long you’ve been dealing with this, and I want to do what I can. But you have to talk to me. If you’d told me there was shit in here, I could've taken it out. If you need to reduce in increments, that’s fine, I can help you moderate as best I can. but you’ve got to help me help you.”

Tubbo nods. “Me too. Just tell us what you need, ok?”

Schlatt’s lip quivers. He’s never been good with this.

(And he’s too sober for this. He can’t laugh it off.)

“Tomorrow,” he says. “We try again then.”

They grin.

#personal #mcyt #jschlatt #quackity #tubbo #dream smp #dsmp #fundy #l'manberg #l'manburg #l'manhole #lmanburg #lmanberg #schlatt #manburg

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sasuhinasno1fan · 4 years ago

Text

You see the real me

Hey @komorebirei, I’m your @lukadrien-winter gifter! Before we got our assignments, I had been rereading a lot of Sarah Dessen and Meg Cabot books, so this is kinda based on Sarah Dessen’s book Just Listen. If you have read it, don’t worry, I made sure it didn’t have any of your triggers in it. I hope you like it. I based it off one of my favourite scenes from the book. Mentions of ‘the cult’ and Nathan are from Divergance by @depressed-teacup-inc and @sarcasticsparkles (TwiglightMaster15). Hope you enjoy!

Clara Nightingale played from the speakers of Adrien’s computer as he dialled the number for the radio station.

“MIRC Radio.”

“I wasn’t at the mall to see Clara Nightingale; I actually know her,” Adrien defended. He then realised Luka would just use it as an excuse to tease him more.

“That doesn’t exactly clear you of being there,” Luka said. God, he walked right into that one.

“I had a meeting for the fashion show? I’m surprised Rose didn’t tell you.”

“She was more focused on seeing you and getting all that stuff from the swimsuit store. Also, why is Paris’ biggest model doing a fashion show at a mall?”

“You mean, the biggest mall in Paris that holds a total of 30 different stores that sell my father’s clothes? Kinda don’t have a choice.”

“Woo of being a model. Any chance you get to choose what you eat?”

Adrien raised an eyebrow. “Lunch on Friday was a bag of chips. What do you think?”

“Fair enough. Come get breakfast with me. It’s a tradition after every radio show. Nathan’s paying.”

Adrien thought of the red-haired bundle of energy. “Sure.”

“We’ll be at your house in 20. See you then.”

Adrien hung up and closed the webpage that had the radio’s website on it. Usually, he would sleep in on weekends, unless he had any photoshoots. But like many things that changed after the summer, waking up to listen to the radio was a new thing. All Adrien wanted was to get through school without any issues. Not that a certain person would make that easy. And of course because he made stupid decisions that pushed away any friends he could have had, Adrien was alone. It was like when he started school again.

Then…Luka. After a confrontation he’d rather not relive, Luka came to check on him. Even after seeing him hide in the boy’s room and actually get sick, he was there with tissues and water, asking if he was ok. It had been so strange then. To everyone, Luka was the weirdly silent kid who hung out with a ‘cult’, but would apparently beat up anyone who looked at him wrong. Adrien still remembered when one of the seniors had tried lording over him. Luka dropped his guitar case, punched the guy in the face and then walked off. He should have been terrifying. But like people started to believe the rumors following Adrien about him, he realised he had been the same for Luka. Luka was just a guy so in love with music and had trouble expressing himself without it, so he’d done it with his fists. But Anger Management had helped and now he actually had words and Adrien just couldn’t help but feel stable around him.

Everything else in his life was going crazy. The rumors, the actual truth behind said rumors, Felix and issues with his mom and Adrien’s father, his loneliness because he couldn’t just talk to the people he’d been friends with for so long, the pressures of still doing modelling, everything. Luka made sense and even with his incredibly odd taste for music and odd sayings pulled from Anger Management classes, Adrien felt happy. Of course the crush that was growing might have also added things. He tried ignoring it, and maybe ignoring Luka, but the idea of losing him wasn’t something he wanted, so he accepted it. Whether or not he’d act on it was the question, but who knew.

The mansion was quiet. His parents were still out of town, Felix was no doubt still asleep and Nathalie never got up before coffee was made. He did find Gorilla in the kitchen doing just that though.

“Hey, I’m going out for breakfast. A friend is picking me up,” he told the towering silent man, who nodded after miming at him to have his phone.

He walked outside, already finding two motorcycles sitting outside the gate. Luka had his spare helmet waiting for him, his own visor pushed up.

“Question, how do you feel about bacon?”

“Bacon?”

“You know, pork product? Smells amazing? Best part of breakfast?”

“I mean, it’s not usually one of my list of things I can eat, but I guess I can deal.”

“Excellent, get on.”

Adrien had gotten very used to Luka’s very fast driving and before he knew it, they were pulling up to a large restaurant. Nathan was bouncing in place waiting for Adrien and Luka to get off the bike before he darted off to the front door. The restraint was modelled after an American diner and it was freezing inside.

“Oh, right. Sorry, I forgot to mention how cold they have it in here,” Luka said, pulling off his jacket, which Adrien tried to wave off. “Trust me. They keep it cold in here so you don’t stay all day.”

He took the jacket, taking in how warm it was. Luka’s scent wafted up, almost covering up the heavy smell of bacon inside the restaurant.

“Why does it smell like a meat store in here?” Adrien asked, sitting next to Luka.

“Well this place has always been the place we get breakfast from after the radio show. Ever since the first one. But they got a competitor not too long ago,” Nathan started to explain.

“With crap pancakes and service.” Luka interrupted.

“Yes. So to counteract it, they made every day double bacon day. Whatever you order, you get a double order of bacon.”

“Which he of course has to pay for.”

Nathan pouted. “You try asking for what I want.”

“I have.” Noticing Adrien’s confused face, he explained. “We’ve got a friend who makes D&D characters and she designs all of ours. Nathan here has a specific look he wants but he thinks it’s too embarrassing to ask for. I told him if he asked, I’d pay for breakfast forever. If he doesn’t, then he will. We’ve had two redesigns in the past year or so and he’s still chickened out.”

Nathan stuck his tongue out like a child. “Leave me alone.”

Adrien shook his head. This was his life now, with a music loving former rebel and an overactive redhead. This he would gladly deal with.

While the others ordered large platters, Adrien played it safe with a waffle and bacon, though Luka let him steal some of his eggs. Funnily enough, if Nathan tried, he’d get a slap on the back of the hand. He tried not to preen at the special attention.

Nathan had to head to work, so it was just the two of them as they drove back towards Agreste Mansion. It was still quiet in the streets and it seemed like there was no movement in the house.

“Thanks for breakfast.”

“No problem. If I had known playing pop songs would get your attention, I would have done it sooner.”

Adrien rolled his eyes. “No you wouldn’t.”

“Ok no cause I hate that music but still. You said you won’t be at school on Monday, right?”

“Yeah, it’s the only time an outfit fitting could be scheduled. So Tuesday then?”

“Tuesday. I’ll see you later.”

Adrien had already entered through the gates when he realised that he was still wearing Luka’s jacket. He turned to try and give it back, but Luka had already sped off. Adrien started to pull it off anyway as he made his way through the door when he felt something in the coat hit against his leg. Inside one of the pockets was Luka’s iPod. His pride and joy. Adrien couldn’t remember a time when Luka didn’t have it on him.

That first day of school, when Adrien avoided the lunch room or any of the lunch benches out on the quad, he sat next to Luka against a wall. He had his earphones in, eyes focused on a book. Adrien still didn’t know him then. If he’d been told at that time that Luka Couffaine would become his rock, his best friend, his, well, crush, he would have thought that person was insane. But here he was.

Felix was leaving the dining room when he went inside, looking surprised to see Adrien.

“When did you leave?”

“Early this morning. I got breakfast with a friend.”

Felix raised an eyebrow. “Same one who delivered that pizza before?”

One of Luka’s jobs was as a delivery person for a local pizza place. When Adrien had tried listening to one of Luka’s many made CDs for him – so he could be educated on the right type of music – and fallen asleep, it led to Felix meeting Luka for the first time. Adrien hadn’t been looking for it but it sounded like Felix approved and that gave him a feeling of happiness.

“Maybe.”

Felix let out a hum before heading to the stairs. He was happy he didn’t say anything more. Adrien wasn’t sure what he’d say anyway.

He collapsed onto his bed, ready to fall asleep again. He couldn’t though, because of a certain item. Luka’s iPod. He was never seen without it. Luka said the silence made him itch, like everything was too much to handle. So the thing that helped him was never far out of reach. It turned on, still a half full battery available. There were many playlists, the names making no sense, but one caught his attention.

ADRIEN

He knew sneaking around on it wasn’t the best idea but…he couldn’t help himself. He pressed the center button and the list of songs that appeared where a mash of a lot of things. Things that looked very familiar. Because they were all the songs he and Luka ever talked about. Luka had a playlist of all the songs they talked about and it was a lot.

He wanted to know if the way he felt was the same. If he was making things up or wishing too hard. He wanted answers. It took all of his energy to not go running after Luka and asking. He fell asleep after several minutes of slowly scrolling through the list of songs Luka had under his name.

_______________

Adrien climbed out of the car, watching as Gorilla pulled out his phone. He meant to leave the house earlier. He distracted himself with homework before he went to ask Gorilla to take him to Luka’s house, when he was interrupted by a mighty crash from the kitchen. Felix was attempting to cook. Adrien stayed back to help and eat with him before he left.

He crossed the gangplank onto the deck of the house boat. The deck was empty, though there seemed to be music playing in the area above. He didn’t remember the whole look of it from the last time he was here, but he was sure that was a sitting area. He knocked on the door below the deck, which swung open. Rose, Luka’s sister’s girlfriend, let out a shriek when she saw who was standing on the other side.

“Adrien! What are you doing here?”

“Is that Adrien Agreste?” A girl with dreadlocks, some strands of different colours, looked at him in awe. There was another girl with red hair and glasses and another with a baseball cap and Juleka. They were all staring at him.

“Adrien is my friend! Oh, come in!” He was yanked inside where music seemed to be echoing on the walls and the living room was a mess. “We’re having a fashion show sleepover. You have to stay and help us with our looks.”

“Oh, well, you see.”

“Rose, are you ready yet? I have…” Luka walked in with a DSLR camera around his neck. “A show to plan? Adrien, what are you doing here?”

“He’s here to help us with our looks.” Rose said, pulling Adrien further into the house. He sent a pleading look to Luka who shrugged. He had a feeling that telling Rose ‘no’ was a hard thing. He was dragged to Juleka’s room, though Luka’s was separated with a curtain that was currently pushed back. Juleka’s taste in decorating was darker than her brother’s, but a lot of things seemed to be similar, such as the guitar and bass sitting in their stands and the posters of Jagged Stone. Some pictures didn’t really fit Juleka’s theme. Pictures of models, both male and female.

“Look, these are you.” Pictures from his father’s brand, from cologne ads, from sporting wear, even from that department store ad, with the tux for the dance, the perfect outfit and hair after fencing, the perfect outfit to study in the library. “I loved that ad so much and its story. You were so cool. You were like…”

“The guy who had everything.”

“Exactly!”

“Rose, come on. I have a show to plan. Are we going to do this or not?” Luka said, finally pulling her attention away.

“Alright, alright. Who has the order lists?”

The girls started to leave the area, but not before the one in the baseball cap turned and quickly slapped the back of Luka’s butt, causing them all to burst into laughter as he let out a startled yelp. They quickly disappeared when he turned to glare at them. Adrien couldn’t help but stifle his laughter. It had been a high pitch squeak.

“Not a word out of you,” Luka ordered upon seeing him laugh.

“Course not. Here, I wanted to give this back to you,” he said, handing over the jacket.

“Oh, I could have waited until Tuesday to get this.”

“I know. I’m just sure you couldn’t wait for this.” He pulled out Luka’s iPod from one of the pockets, watching his face light up.

“Oh I would so miss this! Thank you.”

“I had a feeling you’d flip all of Paris to try and find it.”

“Very true. So what commercial was Rose talking about?”

Adrien pointed to the pictures from the different scenes of the ad. “It was from the department store for their back to school campaign. I’m the guy who has everything. Don’t feel like it though.”

“Doesn’t really look like you.”

Adrien looked over at him feeling a little insulted. “You don’t have to like it.”

“No, I mean, I’m looking at it and I see this picture-perfect person and think, ‘that’s not my Adrien’. It just doesn’t look like the real you.”

Before Adrien could ask him who the real Adrien was, Rose called from what sounded like above deck. Luka looked pained as he turned, heading towards the stairs.

“This is gonna end in tears. Just you watch.”

It took a while but it turned out Luka was right. Adrien had been in his corner of the sitting area on the deck above surrounded by mountains of makeup when one of the girls, Mylène, burst into tears.

“I don’t want to do this outfit anymore! I’m always in this one.” It was a beachy outfit; which Adrien guessed her dreads played a part in. Everyone else had changed a good number of times, but Mylène always seemed to be in different versions of the same outfit.

He quickly swooped in and took Mylène downstairs. She directed him to the clothes she brought over and it took a bit of prodding to find an outfit. He sent her off to the bathroom while he rooted through the pile of shoes to find a pair that would fit her. He looked up to see Luka leaning against the post that acted as the centre between his and Juleka’s rooms.

“You’re good at this,” he said, smiling down at Adrien.

“Modelling does lead to tears. Just find something to distract them and give them lots of chocolate after. Works every time.” Adrien finally found the shoes he wanted and stood up to see Luka pointing the camera at him. Covering his face with his hand, he said, “No. I don’t like having my picture taken.”

“But you’re one of Paris’ biggest models.”

“I know. Trust me, getting cameras shoved in your face is not as glamorous as it seems.”

“Oh, come on. Let me at least show you what I see.”

Remembering what Luka had said earlier about the ad pictures not looking like ‘his Adrien’, he brought his hand down and relaxed his body. He felt the smallest smile come to his face as Luka brought the camera back up and clicked the shutter. He walked over, leaning close to Luka as he brought the picture up. The lighting wasn’t the greatest and in the mess of helping Rose, his hair and clothes were a bit messy, but…he understood what Luka was saying.

“This is the real you,” Luka said, his words just brushing Adrien’s cheek, that’s how close they were. “This is my Adrien.”

My Adrien. It wasn’t weirdly possessive. It was comforting and with every insane thing that was happening in his life, to be picked by someone just for being himself, that made his heart happy.

Maybe that’s why when he looked up and saw Luka staring at him, eyes moving down to his lips, he kissed him. He felt Luka kiss back. Adrien wanted to grab hold of him because the kiss made him feel weak in the knees, it felt that good, but unfortunately, that didn’t happen.

“How do I look?”

The two sprang apart, Luka hitting his head on the post. Mylène looked worried and a bit confused, but thankfully it looked like she hadn’t seen.

“Are you ok?” she asked.

“Luka! We’re ready for group shots!” Rose called from above deck.

“He’s all good. Here, put them on quickly,” Adrien said, handing her the shoes and pushing her towards the stairs. He could tell she was confused, but thankfully she didn’t ask.

They didn’t get a chance to be alone until the photoshoot was done and Luka had gotten the call that his mom would be home soon and the house was a mess. Luka walked Adrien to the gangplank, still waving off his offers to help clean up.

“Don’t worry about it. The girls will take care of most of it. Thanks again for bringing my iPod.”

“Of course.” Adrien hesitated, wanting to ask if the kiss was a fluke or if it was real when he realised Luka was moving closer to him, gently pulling his fidgeting fingers apart and linking them with his own.

“This ok?”

“Yeah. Perfect.”

Luka was leaning down and Adrien started to go up on his toes when they heard Rose. She came bounding over with pictures in her hand. The one that Luka took of him was on top.

“Here, so you can decorate your wall.”

When she finally went back below deck, Adrien gave Luka the picture he took of him. “That way you always remember what I look like. I might be coming to school in a few makeup looks next week.”

“Bet you’ll still look amazing as usual. I’m very tempted to test my luck a third time, but I can wait. Would you be ok if I came and picked you up on Tuesday?”

Adrien nodded, taking everything in him not to pull Luka in for a kiss, no matter who was watching.

“Awesome. I’ll see you then.”

Adrien had to bite down his smile when he eventually pulled himself away and got into the car. Kissing his rock should make him afraid of messing things up, but how could he when everything felt so right? And if Luka came to get him for school on Tuesday morning and Adrien noticed that his lanyard that had his student ID on it also had the picture of Adrien, well. How was he supposed to argue with that?

#Lukadrienwinterexchange #lukadrien #just listen au

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tabloidtoc · 4 years ago

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Star, January 11

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover Story: Hollywood’s Best and Worst Bosses

Page 1: Shia LaBeouf currently accused of relentless abuse and sexual battery by his ex FKA Twigs was snapped making out with Margaret Qualley after she arrived at LAX for a solid 10 minutes and holding up traffic -- the PDA session was the first time Shia and Margaret who is the daughter of Andie MacDowell were spotted out in public together but the two got well-acquainted a few months ago rolling around naked for a NSFW music video for a song by the actress’ sister Rainey Qualley a.k.a. Rainsford -- Shia went out of his way to charm Margaret as soon as they met and he wooed her with compliments and gifts and flowers and texts and spur-of-the-moment dates where he’d just show up at her house but her friends are concerned because Twigs’ lawsuit against Shia alleges multiple incidents of abuse including choking her in her sleep and knowingly giving her a sexually transmitted disease -- Shia said many of those allegations are not true and he is in a 12-step program and therapy for PTSD and alcoholism

Page 2: Contents, Prince William and Duchess Kate with kids Prince George and Princess Charlotte and Prince Louis for a Christmas card

Page 3: Candice Swanepoel in a bathing suit in Miami, Jennifer Garner stepped out to run errands in a mask and an expressive sweater in L.A., Ryan Reynolds cuddled up with a puppy to encourage his Instagram followers to donate to the SickKids Foundation

Page 4: Friends of Johnny Depp are keeping their distance as he gears up for another ugly defamation trial against ex-wife Amber Heard -- after losing the case against a U.K. newspaper that called him a wife beater and a scathing feature in The Hollywood Reporter that dubbed the star radioactive and his career all but dead, former pals want nothing to do with him -- the likes of Jude Law, Leonardo DiCaprio and Channing Tatum have been backpeddling on Johnny and it’s making him furious but to be fair Johnny had already alienated Leo and Channing by calling them Pumpkin Head and Potato Head and accusing them of having affairs with Amber -- Jude’s indifference cuts the deepest because for a time he and Johnny were brothers-in-arms as they filmed the second Fantastic Beasts movie and from Johnny’s perspective Jude hasn’t lifted a finger to defend him

Page 5: Mossimo Giannulli’s son is speaking out claiming the fashion designer is being treated harshly at California’s Federal Correctional Institution in Lompoc and Gianni Giannulli took to social media to complain that because of the pandemic his dad has been locked in solitary confinement for one full month and is only let out every three days for a few moments to shower and Gianni, Mossimo’s son from an earlier relationship, is irate that his father is being mistreated and he feels sorry for his dad and doesn’t want to see him languishing in prison however his half sisters Bela and Olivia Jade don’t seem too bothered by it

* At age 74 Susan Sarandon has had it with men -- she said she hasn’t really had a large dating career and in fact hasn’t had a guy in five years and it’s not that she can’t get a man, it’s just that the men she attracts are losers or sub-par in some way -- she is happy hanging out in her NYC apartment but still friends can’t help trying to fix her up because she’s attractive and in phenomenal shape but the problem is she scares guys away; she’s a force they can’t handle

* Two years after sharing her shock diagnosis with multiple sclerosis Selma Blair is struggling with pain and fear -- she was recently spotted getting emotional outside a West Hollywood cannabis shop and she has turned to medical marijuana to soothe symptoms of the chronic immune-system disorder which can include fatigue, spasticity, walking issues, numbness, weakness, vision issues and pain -- on some days she can’t even get out of bed but she’s trying to stay strong for her son Arthur and smile more for him but it’s been hard

Page 6: Julianne Hough appears to be sweetness and light but she’s a heartbreaker according to her ex Chuck Wicks who split from Julianne in 2009 -- in a revealing podcast Chuck blasted Julianne saying they were both loving life then out of nowhere you find out that they are not the person you thought they were and you break up -- Chuck admitted that he and Julianne agreed to say their split was amicable but it wasn’t fine and it wasn’t his fault

* After holing up at his Oklahoma spread Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani are having a blast decorating their 13,000-square-foot $13.2 million new home in the Encino area of California’s San Fernando Valley -- the home sits on 1.6 ultra-private acres behind double gates and extensive walls and features a pool and fabulous views -- inside the engaged pair give each other space: Gwen wants a dance studio and Blake gets his own man-cave with a big screen and high-tech surround sound

* Star Spots the Stars -- Nicky Hilton, Katharine McPhee Foster, Katherine Schwarzenegger Pratt making dairy-free and plant-based holiday appetizers, Jenna Dewan, Natalia Dyer

Page 8: Big Losers -- these stars shed pounds and got healthy in 2020 -- Jessica Simpson, Rebel Wilson, Kelly Osbourne

Page 10: Star Shots -- Gwen Stefani on the way to the recording studio in Santa Monica, Jerry O’Connell started his morning off with a fresh mimosa and a kiss from one of his dogs, Jodie Turner-Smith is the first Black actress to play Henry VIII’s ill-fated queen Anne Boleyn in a major U.K. TV series in Emley, UK

Page 11: Nick Cannon pitched in to help distribute 2000 free meal boxes to the Hollywood Food Coalition

Page 12: Demi Moore in a yellow bow for a selfie thanking readers for checking out her memoir, Paris Hilton kicked back for a Coach campaign reintroducing the early-2000s ubiquitous Swinger bag

Page 13: Derek Hough and his dogs Romie and Luna, Irina Shayk striking a pose

Page 14: Sofia Vergara during a photoshoot, Real Housewives of New York City alum Kristen Taekman is taking advantage of the California winter weather in a bikini in Malibu, Wells Adams takes out the trash in L.A.

Page 16: Carrie Underwood showed off her comfy at-home style, Vanessa Hudgens and her favorite condiment, Katherine Schwarzenegger celebrates her dog’s birthday

Page 17: Vanderpump Rules star Tom Sandoval picked up a holiday-themed centerpiece ahead of Christmas in L.A., Katie Holmes slung a guitar over her shoulder in NYC, Dame Joan Collins dropped by The Jonathan Ross Show in London

Page 18: Normal or Not? Hailey Baldwin shares a glimpse into her beauty routine -- normal, Tiger Woods’ son Charlie showed off his skills ahead of the PNC Championship -- normal

Page 19: Pete Wentz playing tennis in L.A. -- normal, Pete Davidson hurt himself a few times while making a scarf -- not normal

Page 20: Fashion -- stars charm in romantic ruffles -- Keke Palmer, Gwyneth Paltrow, Lupita Nyong’o

Page 21: Kirsten Dunst, Halsey

Page 24: Ariana Grande announced her engagement to realtor Dalton Gomez with some celebratory shots and she’s telling everyone how she never thought it was possible to be this happy -- the couple began dating in early 2020 when Dalton helped Ariana find a home in L.A. and things hit the fast track amid the health pandemic which saw the two enjoying quality time together in lockdown and realizing they were a perfect fit because they never fight and are totally in sync about how they look at life -- Ariana went straight into wedding mode already deciding on an intimate outdoor setting in mid-2021

Page 25: Jon Hamm stepped out in L.A. recently with girlfriend Anna Osceola and she was showing off a noticeably rounder midsection and there’s a good chance the two are pregnant because they’ve been actively trying to get into the family way -- though Jon admitted in 2016 that having children isn’t necessarily an imperative Jon may have changed his tune after his year-long relationship with Anna and hitting the big 5-0 in March has him reassessing his life and now having a child has become important to him

* Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher will be camping in style now that they’ve purchased a $140K Mercedes Benz Sprinter and they’re preparing to embark on an adventure -- with sleeping accommodations for four and a kitchen the spacious luxury vehicle is perfect for the couple and their two kids -- other stars can spend their vacations in five-star resorts but Mila and Ashton prefer to keep things alfresco and it’s a tradition they’ve kept all these years; this is their idea of a perfectly fun vacation

Page 26: Cover Story -- Hollywood’s Best and Worst Bosses -- who’s great to work for and who makes employees’ lives a misery -- Jennifer Hudson -- best

Page 27: Jennifer Lopez -- worst, Rihanna -- best, Kenny Chesney -- best, Mariah Carey -- worst, Gwyneth Paltrow -- worst

Page 28: Keanu Reeves -- best, Sandra Bullock -- best, Emma Watson -- worst

Page 29: George Clooney -- best, Ellen DeGeneres -- worst, Guess the Bad Boss

Page 30: Tom Cruise and Hayley Atwell: Man on a Mission -- amid all the tension on the set of Mission: Impossible 7 Tom has been pursuing his costar Hayley to be his next girlfriend and it seems to be working -- Tom has become very active with the U.K. Scientology Branch and is very taken with English women like Hayley and he’d like to make the U.K. his home base -- handcuffed to each other for several scenes in M:I7 Hayley and Tom were also spotted holding hands when the cameras weren’t rolling

Page 32: Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s very L.A. Christmas -- the prince spends the holidays 5000 miles away from the royal family but Meghan’s mom Doria Ragland was on hand for the festivities -- the couple were intending to call Queen Elizabeth on Christmas morning otherwise they were happy to celebrate a low-key holiday

Page 38: Entertainment

Page 48: Parting Shot -- Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas suited up to hit the slopes stopping by a local store to pick up goodies before changing into warmer gear in Mammoth Lakes in California -- the couple are familiar faces in the ski town and looking forward they will be able to plan even more snowy getaways now that they’ve listed their NYC apartment for $5.9 million and moved full-time to Encino

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capricornus-rex · 4 years ago

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Someone Left to Save (15)

Cal Kestis x Reader

Requested by Anon

Summary: The Mantis crew arrives to the capital of Ulfin, in the planet of Pevera, under siege. They meet the local rebel cell spearheaded by the former Republic admiral, Jax Beneb, who seeks to destroy the Empire’s occupation that was aggressively imposed upon while exploiting the planet of its natural resources. A plan is devised to destroy the Imperial’s main base of operations—as well as their influence—in the planet; however, it was a do-or-die mission that you and Cal had gotten yourselves caught in.

A/N: I’m almost done!! :D This was really a trip both in the story itself and getting the chapters published. Thank you to everyone who kept staying tuned to the story even if my predicament forced me to slow down my upload frequency. If you guys enjoyed most of the story, then all the trouble I went through was worth it! :3

Tags: Force-Sensitive! Reader, Inquisitor! Reader, Jedi! Reader, Fake Death, Jedi turned Inquisitor, Seduction to the Dark Side, Turn to the Dark Side, The Dark Side of the Force, Aftermath of Torture, Torture, Psychological Torture, Redemption Arc! Reader, Possible Redemption, Premonitions

Also in AO3

Chapters: 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 | Previous: Part 14 | Next: Part 16 | Masterlist

15 of ?

The plan's going swimmingly. Cal hasn't been caught yet.

He had sensed that Cere prayed he needn't to use his saber prior to his inevitable stand-off with you. So far, he's keeping true to that prayer. He carves a path to the nearest entrance he can find, from there, he discovers the southern exit; taking the posted Stormtroopers by surprise, he incapacitated them quickly befire they even realize what's standing in front of them.

"Cere, I'm in the building—I went through the southern entrance," Cal softly spoke through his comm.

"Copy, I found my way in the eastern wing," Cere explains that she managed to get her hands on one of the computers, splice it and fish out a lot of info. "I'm patching in the map to you, BD should've picked up the file by now."

Instinctively, BD-1 flashes the holomap in the air as soon as he received the data; it shows the locations of Cere, Cal, and their two respective destinations—the medical bay where the child is kept and the hangar where the presumed transport ship should be parked. There's a large, empty gap between where Cal stood and the hangar itself.

"I'm looking at the map now. There's a bit of distance to the hangar, it's on the upper levels too," he softly trailed off at the last word.

Cere noted the fading out of his voice, afraid that she's lost contact, "Cal?"

The boy blinked several times to return to reality. He stutters in his apology for spacing out.

"What's wrong?"

Finally, he opens up about his theory about the transport ship, he adds the lone TIE Fighter he spotted earlier and the underlying possibility that the pilot is you—not knowing that you really are. Cere considers the theory but preferred to go with the original plan; if the transport is truly a decoy, then they'll have to move fast in catching up to you before you even hop into the TIE Fighter with the child—assuming that your TIE Fighter is in a completely different hangar.

The silence of their conversation's conclusion was followed by the gloomy, ominous humming of the corridor that laid in front of Cal's eyes. The stale air that entered his lungs put a tugging weight on him, this place carries a certain degree of corruption that it's simply foreboding to anybody—most especially the Jedi. The sole thought of rescuing you is what kept Cal going; he stalked through the corridor, feeling for any activity in the intersections before going around the next corner.

Eventually, he's halfway into his destination but it seems Cere still hasn't put her diversion in motion.

Cal peeks over the corner to find a cluster of Stormtroopers—a mix of regulars and scouts—in his path. Two scouts block the path midway while the rest of them stay by the door at the end. He hugs the wall, tugs the saber off of his belt, he stares at the weapons around his clammy fingers; after one deep breath, he bolted out of nowhere and rammed his way through, the dazed troopers barely made a proper aim—some cut close to Cal, others he banked right away.

"It's a Jedi!" One trooper yelped the obvious.

The redheaded Jedi spotted one of the troopers making a run for a button on the wall. Outstretching his arm with his open palm, he hauled that particular trooper away from the button and then towards him, within a saber's reach he was cut down.

"I can't do this by myself!" The surviving scout trooper whimpered out loud, the warble in his voice huffing through his helmet.

The poor scout braved in charging towards Cal, charging up the electric current on his baton, but was denied a shot by a single, successful parry and then the Jedi followed up with an attack—cutting the enemy down instantly. He now stands before a large, sealed door, he checks the map once more and sees the distance between him and the hangar has shrunken. In the next second, a blaring alarm howling across the complex startled him.

"That ought to be Cere, I hope she has the kid."

Upon opening the door, Cal discovers the elevator lobby—which also serves as a control room. Two troopers had their backs turned to him, manning the computers, while a single KX security droid paces back and forth but its scanners immediately detect Cal's presence—causing its head to jerk to the boy's direction, while its emotionless eyes lit up the moment it saw Cal, the troopers felt the abrupt rise of tension and were alerted by the sight of a Jedi in the room.

"Inferior Jedi!" The KX droid monotonously groaned as it raises a pair of fists, ready to swing it down and bash the Jedi's skull.

Fortunately, Cal evaded the clobber and singes the droid's leg joints, literally bringing it to its knees. Shielding itself with its arms proved useless as the Jedi slices the torso in half, leaving only himself and the troopers. The skirmish was done in five minutes, the boy scrambles to the elevator and slams the button of the hangar's floor number. As the turbolift ascends, Cal takes the time to check on Cere, he kept calling, but there was no answer and he gives up when the elevator gradually slowed down.

The rumble signaled that he's reached his destination, the narrow door retracted into the frame, revealing Cal the vast space of the hangar—each wall was lined with light to medium ships, sitting at the center of the hangar is a transport ship, his ears prick up at the faint wailing of a child.

"Oh no…" he thought. "Cere's too late!"

He ran to the ship, the wailing got louder, then his eyes widened at the discovery: a comlink lies on the floor of the entry ramp, a prerecorded soundbite of the cry plays on loop.

It's a trap!

Behind his head, the baritone humming of a spinning saber flings itself towards him, he spun and deflected it at the nick of time—returning it to the sender: you, perched atop the hangar platform, waiting for your prey to take the bait and then strike. You catch your saber in mid-air while descending from the upper platform with a feathery grace. Striding closer to him, he sees you completely without the helmet for the first time: hair fashioned into an elaborate braid, the tail rests on one shoulder, and loose, wispy fringes frame your face.

"I see you've set off my trap," you pointed out, holding the saber close to your face.

"I knew you'd pull a stunt like that!"

Your eyes lit up, impressed with Cal, "Well, you've become quite smarter than I expected!"

Both Inquisitor and Jedi circled slowly against one another, not knowing who's chasing whom, gentle threats exchange with pleas of coming home only to be received with a hard "no," the tension grows in this wide, open space. Cal decides it's now or never, he attempts to talk it out of you.

"[Y/N], let's come home,"

"This is my home."

He hints at the somber tone of your sentence, almost as if you don't mean it at all, and he believed the insincerity of those words. You mask the denial by making the first move in the fight. The swirl of blades caught Cal off-guard, resulting to a flimsy block on his end; he moved away from the ship, luring you into the wider space for a better fight, not that it changes much on each other's chances of winning this skirmish.

You barely paused from moving—a tireless lightning rod in human form—the swordfight pressed on in the hangar. For each time Cal struggled to put some distance between you so he can take a second to breathe, you always caught up to him—your frenzied eyes were always the first thing he notices the moment you start to dart towards him, with your arm prepped for an overhead strike and ready to attack. The strike lands, you withdrew and quickly follow up with another—thrusting your saber, he parried it with a subpar flourish and you staggered him with a strong Force push.

The boy flies to the farther side of the room, in your peripheral vision his lightsaber clatters away from him, his hand desperately pats the floor in search of the weapon while he had his eyes glued to you—closing the space at a fast rate. Still lying on his back, he affords a split second to catch a glimpse of his saber and pull it towards him; his own blade hovers mere inches above his neck when your strike landed as you crouch on top of him, bearing your weight on him while you've got him pinned down.

"I almost kind of like this position!" You crowed mischievously.

"[Y/N], please!" He pleaded again.

Without your helmet, Cal saw the life in your eyes better—if he saw wrath the first time, now he sees the misplaced anger and sorrow, the exact same feeling he found during his meditation. He even spots a hint of pink swelling beneath the rims of your eyes.

Has she been… crying? He pondered in that small window of time.

"You don't have to do this—your pain isn't strength!"

Your eyes flared again, but with denial you bellowed, "You don't understand the power that the Dark Side has given me!"

Generously, you withdrew, flipping away from him and landing in the same cat-like grace, giving him a chance to scramble back up on his feet. There was a time for a breather, enough for both. Again, the two of you slowly circle one another while a hostile air hangs over your heads, you point your saber at him.

"I didn't want to be as weak as I was before," you gesture your arms wide open. "And here I am."

"The [Y/N] I know was never weak to begin with,"

You paused in your tracks, slowly angled your head to face Cal, absorbing the empathetic gentleness in his voice. He could make his way through your heart faster than you could build a wall between the two of you. Unconsciously, the atmosphere seems to turn docile.

"I hate it when you patronize me!"

As quick as lightning, you attempt to execute a dashed strike but this time, Cal was prepared for it and he had been anticipating such an attack—he's been reading your every move up until you paused to banter with him. You strike again.

One.

Two.

Slash.

And another.

You jab, but he blocks. Another, and he prevails.

Eventually, he gathered enough strength and momentum, and became at par with the pace and dexterity of your technique. The clashing of sabers became more violent and heavier as the moves from both Jedi and Inquisitor became more pronounced—a contest of brute force. This sudden burst of strength wasn't much of a surprise, you keep up the assault and Cal surely isn't backing down—nor does he plan to.

A single beep of his comlink rings, "Cal, the child is secure! I'm coming for you!"

Cal saw your wide, aghast eyes glimmering with fear and panic, and perhaps a desperation that translates to "I need that child back!" which he felt all at once in that piercing glare when you shot him a look—with your bared teeth and furrowed eyebrows. Heeding to your lessons you, weaponized your emotions against the Jedi, you became a dagger in the wind—amplifying the heaviness of your strikes when it lands and the litheness of your body when eluding his saber.

Cere comes rushing into the hangar, saber and blaster in each hand, reassuring Cal in mere seconds that the child has been brought home.

"The Mantis should be on its way here by now," Cere whispered, her voice shuddered at the words.

She glanced to her side and then fixated her eyes to you—dressed in Inquisitor's garments from the neck down. In your periphery, you saw her blaster hand tremble with fearful disbelief; a secretive smirk played on the corner of your lip, as if to ridicule her shock, her first-time reaction amused you.

"Long time, no see, Cere." You crooned.

"[Y/N], good gods…"

"Oh come now, don't act so surprised. This is your second time anyway!"

A second Jedi wasn't any difficult, thought it's a fresh challenge instead of the typical one-on-one.

"Amazing, I get the privilege of seeing a cut-off Jedi fight firsthand!"

During Cere's attack that you held in a block, you examined Trilla's hilt up close—she had likened it with her old hilt by covering the sleeve with leather wrappings—you glanced at yours in its original form: blood red beams gleaming menacingly on either end, mingling with the purified, ice white blades.

You had to give Cere some credit, even after all these years of being voluntarily cut off from the Force, her muscle memory of combat is intact, incorporating her rugged style with a blaster.

"Impressive," you hummed after a parrying strike, and then another. She quickly switched to her blaster and shot twice, much to her dismay you've banked them seamlessly. "Most impressive."

Cere comes charging at you, ready for a jab, and you'd parry; just when Cal thought you have your attention to her, he attacks—more or less, attempt to—from behind but you duck and twirl, evading his lightsaber and planting a kick on his shin. This dynamic of alternating between the two Jedis lasted for more than a minute, a medley of attack patterns used against you—a handful of which have dealt damage on you, some missed you, but you enjoyed this death-defying thrill, it livened you up in this dull hangar.

Your mischievous, insidious grin stretched across your face melted when the entire hangar rumbled under your boots, explosions roared behind your ears; while holding your ground, you turned to find the source of the sound and found portions of the building are being reduced to shrapnel and inferno. Cere steals your smile and paints it with triumph on; you're not even that mad, you shoot her with a snarl of your lip, catching on with her little game, all the while impressed.

"Oh joy, you'll experience how I actually nearly died!"

You pulled away violently from the tangle of blades, pommeled Cere across the jaw with your own hilt, and pushed her at a certain distance.

"[Y/N]!!"

As the ceiling above your heads crumbled and rained dust, your lightning-fast flurry of the lightsaber did not waive; the boy didn't want to be outmatched—he cannot afford to, now that they're all standing inside a building on the verge of collapse—his dexterity and nimbleness spiked, adapting to your own caliber. Cal wanted to finish this as soon as possible, and he had to think fast; in his peripheral vision, he sees Cere bringing herself back up on her feet, dazed from your hit across her face, and then understood the gravity of her damage.

The garrison begins to collapse, any moment the entire roof will fall over your heads if neither Jedi nor Inquisitor shall stand victorious in this duel. In a final, colossal clash of lightsabers, both youngsters were encased in the sheen of their luminous weapons.

“[Y/N], come on, let’s go home,” Cal pleads once more.

“I can’t—” you choked, tears didn’t hide themselves from Cal, they streamed down your cheek as the stability of your grip fluctuated—influenced by the medley of emotions storming every fiber of your being. “I don’t belong there anymore!”

Despite the sheer intensity, Cal’s voice remained soft and gentle to you, as it always has. In a last-minute resort, he encourages, “You always have belonged with us, and we’re waiting for you to come home.”

Another tear streaks your face, your eyelids drooped, and then spoke in the most defeated, somber tone.

“It’s too late for me now, Cal.”

The crumbling ceiling groans, your eyes roll up and saw the reinforcement beam give way to two colossal chunks of debris plummet in a 50-foot drop from the ceiling straight down to a docked TIE Fighter.

“CAL, LOOK OUT!”

He didn’t fully see your reaction at the last minute; you pull him in and then push him away, but in turn,you got yourself closer to the blast radius. The hot wind picked you up into the air and flung your to the floor like a ragdoll, hitting your head upon landing, rendering you unconscious.

“[Y/N], NO!”

A sharp, piercing noise shrilled in Cal’s ears—all the other noises and voices are reduced to echoing gibberish, even Cere’s calling of your names—straight ahead, he saw you lying unconscious on the floor, covered in debris. He desperately crawled towards you, blatantly ignoring the hollow calls ringing behind his ears; he cradled you in his arms, ignoring the crackling heat flaring near his cheeks.

“[Y/N], come on…” he stuttered. “[Y/N], stay with me… I’m not leaving you a second time!”

He shakes you to coax you into waking up, he could’ve sworn he felt your body shuffle in reaction, he placed his forefinger and middle finger on your neck and found a pulse. He snaps his fingers and BD pops out a stim, he injects it straight into the flesh of your upper arm—you jolted and sucked in a lot of air at the same time, as if emerging into the surface from underwater.

Indeed, you were alive, but relatively weakened by the blast. Your voice saying Cal’s name was drowned out by the roaring flames and the thundering collapse of the garrison.

“Cal, we have to go now!”

Bursting with adrenaline, he scoops you up into his arms and followed Cere to the escape route; evading all the explosions as much as possible and keeping the enemy encounters to a minimum. Although, the evacuees are confused whether to engage the intruders—and presumably, in their heads, rescue the Inquisitor from the Jedi, but they’re felled by either the blasts or Cere’s blaster.

Speeding through the corridors, Cere led Cal to an open docking platform. The Mantis waits at the edge of the catwalk in a fly-by, lightly swerving to dodge blaster fire from the ground, and the entry ramp hangs open.

“Come on, you guys!” shrieked Greez.

Merrin waited by the frame of the entry ramp, the strong wind of the ship and the environment whip her fringes as she feels for balance while getting farther out. On the other hand, Cere and Cal—with you still in his arms—are almost to the edge of the catwalk.

“Come on, you have to jump!” cried out Merrin from the ramp.

Cal assessed the gap between the platform and the ship, it was a risky jump—one miscalculated step equaled to a hundred-foot doom.

“They’re gaining on us!” Cal screeched.

“You go on ahead, I’ll cover you and catch up!”

The boy paced back for momentum, buckled his knees when he slightly crouched, he fixed his grip tighter on you, and trusted his heels as he propelled the balls of his feet off the floor. The Mantis hovers at a considerable height by the edge of the catwalk that won’t send anyone hanging onto the edge of the ramp for dear life.

The soles of his boots planted flat on the metal floor and briskly trotted inside, settling you down gently on the couch, and then he joins Merrin by the ramp, watching Cere blast at the incoming Stormtroopers.

“Cere, let’s go!”

The woman produced a detonator out of her belt pouch and set it off. As a finisher, she gathered all the strength in her throwing arm, the bomb rolled towards the Stormtroopers’ feet and encased them in a cloud of fire and smoke. She quickly turned tail and made the jump, she scrambled on fours to get inside the ship and Cal slams the door button once she’s in.

“Punch it, Greez!”

Greez cranked the hyperdrive lever and sent the Mantis flying out of Jeddah, leaving the garrison crumbling to its destruction in their wake.

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bluebellhairpin · 5 years ago

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Fight or Flight, Rider [2]

Poe Dameron X Pilot!Reader

A/N: Come one, come all! Meet Her Droid! Find out why she’s called Rider! All in one Chapter! - Nemo

Summary: Poe and (y/n) are challenged to a fly-off - and thus the time comes to find out which one is really the better pilot. But are they better at flying, getting distracted, or telling bad jokes?

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

The time you and Poe spent talking went by fast. Very fast.

The fact you were multitasking by talking and tinkering with your X-Wing sure didn’t help time go slower. His droid, BB-8, even came to join you, beeping very cutely as you smiled down at him.

You wondered where your droid went, but didn’t have to for long since he came around not even a couple minutes later - beeping a little less friendly-like at Poe.

“That’s Z2-4.” you said. “Just ignore him, he’s always grumpy.” Poe laughed.

“Like a grandpa-droid?”

“Yes, exactly like a grandpa-droid, only with the body of a two-year-old.”

By the time the call came into the hanger that dinner was ready it felt like only a few minutes had passed, not a couple hours.

During that time you’d shared more than a handful of stories - he about missions, fighting against the First Order and the people who’d done so alongside them. You about tricks you’d learnt, and what you wanted to do to help the Resistance.

It was pretty obvious you and Poe meshed well together.

-----------

“So, we were talking,” Rey said, gesturing at the group of people at the table, most of them familiar faces to you, “And we had an idea to set up a course and get you both up in your ships, then -”

“- Then we can see who’s really the better pilot!” Finn finished, smiling brightly and hopefully at both you and Poe.

“Really?” Poe said, raising an eyebrow at the two. “I don’t see why that’s necessary.”

“Consider it some good old-fashioned entertainment then,” Snaps suggested, “Everyone here needs something nice to watch for once, you two could provide it.”

You and Poe shared a look, you couldn’t stop the smile that started creeping onto your face, while he couldn’t stop shaking his head.

“No. No, no, no.” He said, “The only reason I’m getting into an X-Wing is if it’s for a mission, or training - not for anything like this!”

-----------

“Don’t feel bad or anything Commander, but a number of others do have bet’s going on about which of us will win.”

“I hate this.”

“It’s just like training Poe!”

“I still hate it.” You snickered at his stubbornness, flipping some switches in your cockpit as Z2 beeped behind you. At this point you were thinking Poe would do better flying with your droid rather than his own - they were both harbouring roughly the same amount of grumpiness - and BB was so nice, you’d never say no to having that droid backing you up.

“I’m rather enjoying myself.”

“I can tell - you have a smug-grin on your face already, don’t you?” Poe said, and you laughed, shaking your head as the hum of your ship's engines started to reach your ears.

By the day after Rey and Finn proposed their challenge to you, some smart-ass had managed to get word all around the base - Major (l/n) and Commander Dameron were to face off in a flight-off. Poe reluctantly decided to agree, while you walked around with a skip in your step until you got to sit still in your ship.

There was a crowd around, filtering between where the ships were kept and the command centre, trying to figure out among themselves which spot would be better to watch. You loved how excited everyone was, after everything they’d been through they all needed something nice - you were very willing to provide.

So there you were, at dusk in your X-Wing with Poe in his at your side.

Rey and Chewie were already in the planet’s atmosphere, keeping track of everything by sight, while Finn would look after everything else on the ground in the control room.

“You two ready?” Finn asked, patching through to your comms.

“Sure.” Poe said, moving his ship up, off the ground and into the sky above. You followed, lifting to the sky.

“Let’s go already!”

“So eager (y/n), do you even know the course?” Poe asked, looking at you from the gap between your ships.

“Hey, the course isn’t stone-set,” you smiled, “And I rather enjoy playing dirty.” With a wink, you shot forwards, starting the race with one fast move. Through your ear, you heard Poe suck in a breath, then let out a string on incoherent curses, before kicking his X-Wing into gear behind you.

“You little minx, you think you can lose me that easy?” Poe called, his ship swinging around the underside of yours, before looping over to return to its original position beside yours. “‘m afraid I’m not that easily lost.”

You smiled to yourself, shaking your head at his cocky nature - mostly because it reminded you of yourself.

“I’ve heard that one before Dameron!” You said, then jolted your ship up, higher into the sky than before - and away from anything that could come in your way like cliffs and trees.

Were you sick of trees.

Up here, where the sky meets the stars - that’s where you live, where you thrive, and where you fly best. It’s higher, you can fly further, and you can fly faster.

It’s high, yes, and a definite no to anyone that’s lighthearted, but even in the stuffy cockpit with Z2’s less-than-happy beeps, and Finn and Poe sputtering at your moves through your headset, it’s still a place that feels more like home than anywhere else.

That’s a place and feeling you can never get tired of - it’s unbeatable.

“Woah, (y/n), kind of unconventional of you, but I think I’m liking it.” Poe said, popping you out of your daydream. He was back to flying beside you through the place between the world below and the stars above met, having caught up just like he did before.

“You think? Used to do this after we were grounded on Nephimm for the night - that was very unconventional!”

Poe caught your eye from beside you, his laugh ringing in your ears.

“Quite the rebel - you do fit in here, don’t you?”

“Enough flirting! Get back to the race!” Finn said, sounding both excited and annoyed that you were spending more time talking at that moment compared to flying.

With a shake of your head to rid yourself of your heated cheeks, you let out a sigh and swung your X-Wing around. Sending a salute to Poe, you took off again, back around towards the base. This time you weren’t going to fly so high if Poe was so insistent on following you.

“Let’s see how well Poe does trying to follow me through the trees.” you said, and Z2 beeped at you - it was just about the happiest you’d heard the droid all day.

You lowered into the trees, flying between them like it was nothing. All the practice does pay off.

The downside to flying in areas that had a lot of hazards is that you couldn’t pay as much attention to where Poe was - all you could do was make sure he wasn’t in front of you. Casting a glance out your side window you could see poe wasn’t too far away, and despite everything you were having fun. You’re sure Poe would be too, and even though you were as cocky and hot headed as he was, you figured it’d be good for morale to have him win - even if you did let him.

But no one had to know that.

----------

“(y/n), that was amazing!” Finn said, greeting you as you exited your X-Wing, “You were ahead of Poe for so long, but then you lost it!” he said, claping you on your shoulder.

“Hey Finn, the best skill you can have is humility and experience. Poe has a larger amount of the latter compared to me.” you said, looking over at him, a light smile on your face.

“You’re making me sound arrogant and old.” Poe said, coming up behind you to grab you around your shoulders in some sort of a hug. “I’m not that old!”

“I can’t believe it! Guys, you won’t believe it!” Rey came running at you, having landed the Falcon a fair few minutes after you - acting like a godsave in case you needed to actually talk to Poe while his arms were around you. “You three won’t believe what Chewie and I saw!”

“Oh wow,” you said, laughing as you looked at Finn and Poe - the latter of which now had an arm slung around your shoulders, “I wonder if we might not believe what she’s gonna tell us.”

“Don’t tease (y/n).” she whined, then went back to her ‘unbelievable’ story, “There were lights with you - they were unmissable!”

You were pretty sure all three of you looked very confused. Thankfully Rey elaborated.

“You really didn’t see them? You went so high up into the sky that lights started appearing near you! There were purple ones, and green ones, and pink ones. I’ve never seen them before. It looked - it was so - words just can’t describe it.” She said, her hands flopping to her side as she tilted her head at the three of you. “I cannot describe it, you’d have to have seen it.”

Chewie made a noise behind her, and then she nodded.

“Yes, that's exactly it.” She rested her hands on her hips. “You were riding the lights.”

“Ohhh, a light Rider,” Poe said, squeezing your shoulder before letting it go and leaning on the table next to him. You’d hate to admit you missed him - even if he only moved away from you a foot. “Good thing you’re on the side with the Jedi.” he hummed, smiling smugly at Rey before sending you a wink.

“Oh jeez Poe, find some better jokes, will you?”

“Finn they’re - Finn come back here! - They’re not that bad!” Poe said, chasing after Finn though the ships and crates and mechanics.

Those two where the personification of ‘Boys will be Boys’.

It was fantastic.

“I rode the lights?” you said, sliding up to Rey’s side. “Did it really look that cool?”

“Why yes it did.” she said, messing your hair in a way only she could get away with. “You slow-flying, validation-craving, light Rider.”

“Slow-flying?” you said, your mouth wide open, “How dare you say something so untrue!”

“Oh, trust me (y/n), you’re slower than Poe.” she said, leaning over to whisper to you with a knowing smile, “Even though, really, that is untrue. I could feel it, you know, you slowed down so Poe would win.”

“You tell anyone that and you’ll need more than the force and a lightsaber to save you.” She laughed, wrapping her arms around you as you both made you way off to find where the boys went.

“I don’t plan on telling anyone ever. I would never tattle on my best friend like that.”

“Rey,” you said, dramatically mocking a sob, the back of one of your hands resting on your forehead while the other covered your heart, “You think I’m your best friend?”

“Wow,” she said slowly, “At least now I know you’re a bad actress.”

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Series Taglist: @writefightandflightclub @demigod-dragonrider-schoolidol @robindoesntloveme @kiaralein @daniellajocelyn

Series Taglist is Open!

#fight or flight rider #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron imagine #poe dameron oneshot #star wars x reader #star wars imagine #star wars oneshot

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sarahxalice · 3 years ago

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Character Introduction - Meww Hatsune

--Edits/Updates-- --Edited 8/30/21-- Organized body type information into a list rather than a paragraph.

Hello first post here, maybe I’ll try and setup a format or whatever, but I’ll just go with the flow for now. This very first post will be of my Main and very first OC, Meww Hatsune.

--Origin and Inspirations-- Her origins are quite fuzzy a bit as she is by far my oldest character. She originated as either a character concept to either represent myself online and in games, or as a DND character. She was most definitely used as both and for an extremely long time. Of course character development happens over time and isn’t all at once, it’s just a question of when a solid basis was made for her.

Her name is a bit easier to talk about, while my memory is terrible I can at least probably pull a few references I came across that inspired it. One of the main sources of inspiration was Nyu from the anime Elfen Lied. Unfortunately am currently failing to recall other name inspirations, I can recall having around 3 and yet am missing the others. If I can I will edit this post to update this part, if not I will just make a new post later on adding on information.

As far as inspirations for appearance, characters like Lucy and Nyu from Elfen Lied, Zoey from Tokyo Mew Mew and Yuno Gasai from Mirai Nikki. Main inspiration from these characters is her pink hair and eyes. Skin tone and clothing preferences are based on myself and my own preferences.

Inspirations for her personality while partly coming from characters like Yuno Gasai, a majority of it is just something I was taught about when making characters for the first time for a DND campaign. Which was basically to take a personality trait from yourself and just exaggerate it. And essentially it would be close enough to yourself so it would be easy to roleplay while also not being a complete self-insert.

--Appearance-- As for her appearance, she is shown in my tumblr profile image on the left. Going into more detail I will break it up between her physical appearance and her fashion choices.

-Body Type: -Race: Human (Most Commonly), Half-Demon, Demon -Ethnicity: American (Most commonly) -Sex/Gender: Cis Female -Romantic/Sexual Interests: ♥ Girls ♥ Girls ♥ Girls ♥ (Self-claimed “Super Gay”) -Height: ~5ft 2in -Weight: ~100-110lbs -Physique: Lean musculature (Very fit and active) -Skin Tone: Pale White -Hair: Short, soft, messy/wild Pink hair (Varies between pale pink[255,170,255], neon pink[255,0,255], dark reddish pink[120,0,70] and dark pink[180,50,180]). Eyebrows are neat and moderately thin, usually matching the color of her hair. -Eyes: Tend to be sharp and intimidating. Color usually a bright, near glowing, neon pink. -Age: Typically a young teen to adult, roughly in the range of 16 to 21. -Other: Teeth vary between normal human teeth, adding a fang(s), or razor teeth similar to Soul Eater from the anime Soul Eater.

-Clothing Fashion: For fashion, she typically wears a zip up hoodie, cargo pants, combat boots, and a plain black t-shirt. For some extra details she likes chains, belts, buckles and zippers. Most prominently everything she wears is black, if there is any additional color to her outfit it would be pink as a trim highlight or supplementary color (typically a bright or pale pink). Jewelry isn’t very interesting to Meww, however she sometimes has earrings and is more recently depicted with a ring on her left ring finger and will almost always have it from here on.

--Personality-- She is a rash energetic girl. Hyperactive and proactive, likes to do everything herself. Willing to help anyone she gets along with, willing to take on projects or jobs from others as she likes to just do things herself especially when it comes to fighting. Of course things vary based on the kind of world she is in, in a more fantasy setting she’s typically a fighter/adventurer while in a more “realistic” or modern world, she’s really into athletic fields (commonly things like kendo and track), though combat isn’t out of the question, again depending on the world setting. She has the mindset of a rebel and likes to do things her own way rather than taking orders from another person, though not completely disobedient to anyone, and is not entirely against working with others. She just has a tendancy to lead or go alone on things. She is headstrong, confident, positive, a hard worker, supportive, loving, caring, fierce, aggressive and reckless. Of course she is not without her negative qualities too, some of which have been already named such as reckless and her confidence can be overbearing to outright unreasonable and annoying, and at times even worse. While she is a caring and loving person, she can also be really cruel, uncaring, cold and even sometimes sadistic and heinous. Of course interactions depend highly on the person or situation theyre involved with. As for some more negative qualities, she is very apprehensive and more likely to act negatively towards males than she is females. This as such also affects her romantic interest in people as well, making her solidly a lesbian and having no interest in guys in the least. She’s even hesitant to make friends with the opposite gender and acts very standoff-ish with them (this dislike of males can even be seen with other species such as animals as well). As for females she really loves girls, she loves how they’re all so pretty, beautiful, kind and finds them all amazing. Which kind of skews her views on right and wrong with it. She is way more forgiving to a female who does questionable things and is willing to forgive them or make excuses for their actions. Whereas males she almost is ready to condecend them and look down on them as if they are a bad person before even knowing anything of them. As far as children go she is conflicted on them. She tends to dislike children as well, but can also show kindness and caring towards them. As far as the world around her, she absolutely loves nature and flora. She enjoys fauna too, but not nearly as much, and as far as certain types of fauna, she actually dislikes for example, reptiles and insects. For time of day she loves the night and when its darker out, enjoying gloomy weather as well, such as rain and overcast. She has a neutral feeling towards storms, not particularly enjoying lightning or thunder, but is not disturbed by it. She loves nature to the point of even happy to sleep outside, usually in high places such as in a tree or on a roof. She absolutely loves the snow and snowy regions thus making her favorite season by a landslide, winter.

--Other Information-- Here is where I will put other information that I didn’t feel belonging to any of the previous groups of information, and nor do I believe I could write a whole section on it by itself.

-Relatives: Miku Hatsune (Mother; Yes, the Vocaloid), Teto Kasane (Mother; Yes, the Utauloid), Sylvia Hatsune (Wife), Miku Hatsune (Daughter; Named after her grandmother), Chloe Hatsune (Daughter)

-Allies: Sarah Alice (Close Friend; Soul Twin)

-Likes: Girls, Love, Fighting, Adventuring, Witchcraft, Tea, Cats, Sky, Puns, Sarcasm

-Dislikes: Guys, Not doing anything/Waiting

Fighting Style/Powers: She highly enjoyed close-ranged combat, primarily using her bare hands for hand-to-hand combat, a scythe, a spear, or a one-handed sword with an empty off-hand (rapiers are a particular favorite type of swords she prefers). As far as ranged combat goes, she enjoys and prefers bows, pistols and sniper rifles. As far as magic she uses it slightly more often than ranged weaponry. Prefering the elements of Dark and Ice, while next most commonly used would be fire. Other kinds of magic she has been depicted with is the ability to manipulate blood (while not inspired from, but was rienforced with/from Mirai Kuriyama from Beyond the Boundary) and telekinesis. She thrives on and is extremely fast, being usually one of the fastest people in her world. This also gives her a fairly strong reaction time as well.She sometimes is depicted as fairly strong physically as well, though not usually too far off from average in the world she is in. As far as style, she enjoys and tends to go along with more flair and aesthetic choices in her fighting, sometimes at the cost of efficiency. For strategy she tends to forsake it, while she is fairly intelligent and has the capability to be quite strategic, she tends to more commonly rely on raw emotion and instinct instead resulting in a more feral and sometimes beastial fighting style. As she can be reckless, she is highly aggressive and does not tend to protect herself, sometimes even getting hurt unnecissarily. As she really loves the sky she often dreams of flying, so she usually finds some way to do so.

Possible Quotes: -”I love you.” -”Fight me!” -”Oh no~ how awful.” -“But why?” -”Meow.”

#MewwHatsune

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talesofphantombandits · 4 years ago

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The Loyalty of a Bandit ~ Chapter Four.

Character Pairing: Poe Dameron/ OC charcater.

Warnings: probably mild language.

Let me know if you want to be tagged. Tag List: @jingyuhearteu

I woke up way too early the following morning, Lily didn’t even need me for final preparations until 10am and it was currently 7. I sighed stretching out, deciding that the best thing to do would be to get up because well there was no use staying in bed.

I got up, showered then got dressed. Today was going to be a long day so a healthy breakfast was probably the best idea so I didn’t get sick.

I walked out of my given room, the door whooshing open loudly I made my way down to the canteen. What I wasn’t expecting was it to be as busy as it was but then again this was a rebel base, I bet it was busy 24/7 unless everyone is out on the same mission.

I decided on some toast, it would give me the energy for the day but it wasn’t heavy enough to turn my stomach. I turned to find a empty table just behind me and starting heading to it but as I was half way there I heard a familiar annoying voice calling my name.

“This is the new girl?” Poe’s friend beamed at him from his side waving me over to sit with them.

“I think you mean hostage?” I gave Poe my best death glare and sat down opposite them. “Look if I have to spend the next two days with you, I’d rather you say what you have to say and fast so I can at least enjoy my breakfast in peace.”

He just stared at me in shook. “Oft I like her already! My names Finn by the way.” Finn leaned over the table reaching out his hand for me to shake.

I smiled at him then finally focused back on Poe who was giving Finn the sink eye. “So?”

His eyes locked back on mine. “I was just going to wish you luck for our mission, but now that you’ve been rude to me.” He sulked.

I just narrowed my eyes at him. “You haven’t really given me any reason TO be nice to you.”

“Look, I said I’m sorry. I saw a opportunity and I took it.” He shrugged leaning back with his arms crossed. I just rolled my eyes to distracted myself from looking at the muscles flexing in his toned arms.

“Yeah well I’m a person, not an object. You can’t just pluck me out of my life and dump me into a dangerous situation!” I stood up leaving my food on the table, suddenly I wasn’t hungry anymore. “I’ll see you on the ship.”

I stormed away deciding to just go wait with Lily, after an hour had passed it was already time to walk to the ship. I had told Lily about my outburst at breakfast to let off some steam. I just hoped Finn didn’t mind, I didn’t want him thinking that I was a hot head but then again he is friends with Poe, I have no doubts he probably pisses him off too. He seemed like a really nice guy though, shame he was friends with such an idiot.

When me and Lily reached the hanger we found the door to the ship already open, which meant Poe was already here. We walked up the ramp and into the base of the ship, it was a small ship but big enough to serve the purpose we needed it for.

“I’m going to go to the side room to get everything ready.” Lily pointed to a silver door still trying to juggle the mountain of clothes and the makeup trolley she dragged behind her. I did try to help but she refused.

“Okay, I’ll go see if Poe needs help.” I rolled my eyes and she just giggled at me.

She pointed at me the best she could. “No arguing, you need you focus for the missions sake, then when you’re back and base you can kill each other.”

“I’ll try my best, can’t promise anything.” I saluted her and walked off to the cockpit.

As soon as I walked in noticed him in the pilots seat, it looked like him and BB8 were setting up the controls. I thought I had gone unnoticed so I went quietly about setting up and getting myself familiar with the ship, but then his familiar voice pierced the silence.

“I want to apologise for this morning, the way I acted.”

I turned surprised. “ Is it just the fumes messing with my head, or did THE Poe Dameron just apologise to me?”

He just sighed and sunk into his seat further. “I just want to go into this mission with a good vibe between us okay.”

“Okay.” I walked closer to him and shook his hand, BB8 from the side of me started beeping happily. We both turned to him laughing. “But I still don’t forgive you for kidnapping me, It’s going to take more than an apology and a handshake to make up for that.”

I released his hand just as BB8 made a sad whirling noise and slid his little head down. I knelt down so I was face level with the droid. “Don’t worry pipsqueak, I could never be mad at you.” He made a high pitched whirl when I kissed him on top of his head.

Chuckling to myself at how adorable he was I stood up to get ready for take off. Poe just scoffed behind me. “Hey buddy! Remember who’s side your on!” I heard him whisper which made me chuckle even more.

About an hour into the journey I had made my way to the co-pilot’s seat, not one of us had spoken a single word but it wasn’t awkward at all. Even though I disliked the person sitting next to me I felt oddly comfortable in his presence, that didn’t mean that I’d ever forgive him though.

“Solar, It’s time to get ready.” I turned to see Lily standing in the doorway smiling at me.

I sighed. “I’ll see you on the other side Dameron.”

He turned in his chair smirking at me as I began to walk to the door. “When we land I’ll be going straight in as you won’t be ready so just come in the front entrance when you’re ready.”

“Ay Ay captain.” I shouted as I turned the corner.

About half an hour later just as Lily had done setting my hair we felt the ship touch down and the engines go quiet. I took a deep breath trying to keep myself calm.

She grabbed my shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “You’re going to be fine, he might be an ass but he is kind of a badass.” She shrugged her shoulders, I just laughed at her. “ He’ll keep you safe, no doubt about it.”

With that I got up and headed to the little room at the side to put my dress on, when I came out Lily was staring at me with wide eyes.

“What? Is it that bad?” I turned quickly to look at myself in the mirror. “It’s stunning.” Lily whispered.

“Wow, I’ve never seen myself like this.” I spun in the mirror, genuinely smiling for once.

“You’re going to knock Poe’s socks off!” Lily said excitedly.

I spun around so fast that I nearly tripped in my heels. “Shit! Poe, I’m late!” I started rushing out the door, but before I could forget I stuck my head back around the door and thanked Lily for the help. Blowing her a kiss as I scurried off again.

As carefully as I could in my heels I made my way down the hatch to the bay and straight to the main entrance, I could hear the music from inside and the cheery voices most likely from drunk patrons fooling around. Both doors opened wide, once I stepped foot over the thresh hold I knew this was it. I’d have to be calm and collected now, I had to put on my best game face.

Everyone I passed stared at me, I don’t know if it was my immaculate appearance or that I was just a new face in a circle where everyone knew everyone. When I rounded the corner I spotted Poe, He was leaning against the bar. He wore smart suit pants, a tight white button up with a bow tie, but in true Poe fashion instead of a suit jacket he wore a styled black leather jacket.

I started walking towards him when he looked up from the person he was in conversation with, as soon as are eyes locked I froze in place. It was like we were seeing each other for the first time, it was mesmerising.

He placed his glass on the bar behind him, never breaking eye contact with me and started to walk forward. Suddenly all I could see in front of my face was a black moustache that was curled up at both ends, I let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding and looked up. A oldish man was staring down at me.

“What is a pretty young thing like you doing standing here alone?” My stomach churned, I took a step back to make some space between us.

I stepped to the side a little, just to make sure I could still see Poe who had gone back to leaning against the bar. He was burning holes into the back of the man in front of me. “I’m not alone.”

He must have caught my stare over his shoulder, curiosity got the best of him and he turned to see Poe staring. “He’s handsome, I’ll give him that.” he turned back around and grabbed my hand. “But he looks poor, but I’m rich so I think I win sweetheart.”

I looked back over to Poe to ground myself, looking up I saw him making the signal to me that this was our guy. I groaned in my mind, this creep that was already touching me was our mark.

“Well lucky me you were the first person that I bumped into.” I gave him a sweetening smile that made even me feel sick.

“Shall we?” He said pointing to a dark booth in the corner.

#poe #poe dameron fanfic #poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron imagine #poe dameron fanfiction #star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars imagine #star wars x reader

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thebibliomancer · 5 years ago

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Essential Avengers: Avengers #211: ... By Force of MIND!

September, 1981

THE OLD ORDER CHANGETH!

Oh hey, Dazzler, Hercules, Black Widow, Moon Knight, Angel from X-Men, Yellowjacket, Black Panther, Tigra, and Hawkeye?

Are you joining Captain America, Wasp, Beast, Thor, and Iron Man as the new Avengers?

Is this going to be the next biggest roster since the Korvac Saga?

Possibly! Jim Shooter is back and he was the guy behind that story.

Jim Shooter is very back, something the creative credits make sure you don’t miss.

“Joyfully welcome back long-time star Avengers scribe, me, Jim Shooter -- ‘cause I’m writing these credits, and, also I’m the boss!”

Charming. Non-facetiously.

It has similar energy to the ol’ Stan Lee introductions. And is probably just as much a pretense. Eh.

So the story “... By Force of MIND!” starts in the Avengers conference room.

And penciler Gene Colan sure has interesting ideas what that should look like.

We’ve seen the Avengers’ conference room a couple times in various books. They tend to have a grand conference table with assigned chairs?

Look at this one from Avengers Annual #10.

Or the one just as recently as last issue #210.

Pretty big overall. Suitably grand.

But the conference room has apparently been redecorated because it looks different. The personalized chairs are still there.

But the table is puny. It looks like the Young Avengers table at Thanksgiving. Set up off to the side for all the kids. Its dinky. It doesn’t look like all the Avengers can fit around it.

Which possibly supports Captain America’s point when he decides that the Avengers roster needs to be trimmed down to only six.

All those people on the cover are going to be really disappointed to hear this.

Captain America: “The Avengers have a habit of playing for high stakes! I believe that a lean, close-knit group is better... stronger!”

Beast goofs that they’ll need explosives to dislodge him from the team.

Also, there’s a trapeze on the roof of the conference room. Why. I mean, I know why. Your acrobatic characters need to be casually acrobatic at random times or they’ll be bummed out. But also why.

Wonder Man isn’t as bothered. Even after all this time on the team, he doesn’t feel like he’s ever really belonged here doing this hero stuff.

Vision and Scarlet Witch are selling themselves as a package deal. You get both or you get neither.

Captain America gives the Avengers some time to rest and think but they’ll reconvene at 1600 for the new roster announcement.

So there’s 9 people in or adjacent to the Avengers. Thor, Captain America, Iron Man, Beast, Jocasta, Scarlet Witch, Vision, Wonder Man, and Wasp. Three are gonna have to go.

All of this possibly getting fired, gives a pretty dour attitude (except for Wasp who doesn’t seem very concerned and probably doesn’t have a reason to be. Would you want to tell Wasp that she’s fired? I wouldn’t). Beast decides to lighten things up.

By causing problems on purpose.

So Beast bounces through the crowd of Avengers, jostling them all, and stealing Wonder Man’s glasses. Who hates having his glowing eyes show.

Scarlet Witch: “What on-- !? Beast! You crazy -- !”

Beast: “Moi? Crazee? Begging your pardon, mademoiselle witch. I am merely, how you say... playful! So, like gimme some space to be a jerk in, you know? Okay?”

At least he knows he’s being a jerk??

And then he runs off with Wonder Man’s glasses, goofing all the way.

Wonder Man: “Come on, you lame-brained blue-furred buffoon!”

Beast: “Hmmf! I’ll have you know, sir, that I am a highly intelligent blue-furred buffoon. I hole a dozen PhDs! I speak fifty-three languages... but I tell you, I don’t get no respect! Wanna hear me say ‘eat my dust, jocko,’ in Latverian?”

In the face of all this buffoonery, Wasp still doesn’t really care.

She decides the done thing is to go get her hair done for the big meeting. And sure this is short notice but she’s Janet Van Dyne. She’s going to have a movie starlet’s appointment bumped for her.

Scarlet Witch reflects that maybe the reason Jan isn’t worried about the possibility of being cut is that the Avengers aren’t her whole life. She has other stuff going on. A husband. A fashion line. The fabulous existence of being Janet Van Dyne.

Jocasta comes and tries to ask Vision for advice. Even after her big focus story, she still feels like an outsider. And she doesn’t have a life outside the Avengers. So unlike her brain donor Wasp, she is very worried about getting kicked out.

Jocasta: “You’ve learned to fit in, even though you’re a robot, as I am. Please... help me to...”

Vision: “I beg your pardon, Jocasta. I am a synthezoid, not a robot! As such, I am a perfect meld of computer microcircuitry and living, synthetic flesh! In all ways I am a fully functional man! I have a wife -- who needs me now! I cannot help you with your dilemma.”

And then Vision peaces out of this conversation by flying through the ceiling. Even though he’s going to join Wanda who is in an adjacent room. Ya weird, Vision.

You’re also massively unhelpful whenever anyone asks you for advice.

This is fully the second time Jocasta has asked him for advice. At least he didn’t trash the room in an angst ‘I DON’T HAVE FEELINGS AHHHH I MISS WANDA’ tantrum this time.

Jocasta is left alone. Which basically sums up her time in this book. Poor, poor robot. She’s so lonely she goes off on an existential soliloquy right outside Vision and Wanda’s room. Which is a bit passive aggressive. But hey. Superheroes.

Jocasta: “Are you truly so much different, Vision? So much better than I? I know that my voice rings metallic... but yours is cold hollow and emotionless!”

“I have built-in sensors! I can see! I can hear! I can feel! I function well enough? Don’t I? Don’t I? What does it take to be alive?”

“Does it take warm flesh? Am I merely animated because I am made of metal? I did not choose to be what I am!”

“I am what Ultron made me! Ultron -- the evil robot nemesis of the Avengers! He made you too, Vision -- reconstructed you from a long-dead android body! Both of us rebelled against his evil! Both of us sided with the Avengers!”

“Why, then, am I less than you? Is it because you are loved... and I am alone? Ultron... loved me...”

;__;

Poor robot lady.

I do wonder why the Avengers have been so indifferent to her presence. She did come to them during a chaotic moment in the team history. Vision was based on Wonder Man who wasn’t on the team while Jocasta had to coexist with Wasp from day 1.

There’s also that while both she and Vision are angsty robots that turned against Ultron, Vision (despite his famous “even an android can cry” moment) tends to be more performative with his angsts. He sulks. He broods. He smashes furniture.

Jocasta sits quietly and sadly in the background. Makes tentative stabs at companionship but backs off without ever causing a fuss. Different socialization rules for the robot genders possibly?

The good news is that modern Jocasta has learned to assert herself a lot more. She’s been a delight in the Dan Slott Iron Man book.

Anyway. Hopefully that line about Ultron doesn’t foreshadow anything. Its going to be really dumb if Jocasta brings back Ultron because the Avengers treat her with all the attentiveness of the fridge (although she may still legally qualify as one depending on how much of the Henry Peter Gyrich’s nonsense has stuck around).

Time for a sudden, drastic tone shift!

Beast exits stage Avengers Mansion, pursued by Wonder Man.

He hides up a tree like a rocket belt isn’t something Simon has or the ability to jump hella high.

But Wonder Man takes neither of those options. Instead he karate chops the tree down in one stroke. Which is impressive but I imagine Tony Stark is going to be annoyed. That tree was part of the landscaping!

Not expecting this, Beast falls out of the tree complaining that cutting down trees is illegal in New York. Wonder Man catches him and takes his sunglasses back.

Beast: “You grabbed me! But nobody’s fast enough to do that!”

Wonder Man: “People think I’m just strong! Everybody forgets that I have instantaneous reflexes and blinding speed! To me, the world looks like its moving in slow motion!”

I feel like if Wonder Man was Actually Fast all along, he’s not been getting much use out of it, considering how often he takes dumb hits in fights.

And then Wonder Man hurls Beast into the sky.

Like. Really high into the sky.

Beast: “omigosh! omigosh! omigosh! He’s nuts! He’s crazy! He’s -- who cares about him?! I’m dead! He killed me over a crummy prank! For stealing his glasses I get to end up as a blue blotch on the street. My girlfriends won’t recognize me! I can’t look! Wait a minute! This is serious! This is for real! I’m falling at hundreds of miles per hour! Nothing can save me! I’m really going to die! Like this?! I’m going to die like this?! NO!”

Wonder Man: “Relax, Beast. You’re in good hands with Wonder Man!”

Beast: *Whuff*! You -- you caught me! But that’s like catching a bullet.”

Wonder Man: “Told you I moved quick!”

Beast: “thanks. You’re a decent guy for a common ruffian, Wondy!”

I mean, he also threw you straight up, Beast. Is it so impressive that he caught you?

But with the disproportionate response to a prank by making Beast think he’s going to horribly die, Wonder Man sort of apologizes and says he’s going to miss hanging out with Beast.

See, Wonder Man isn’t going to hang around hoping he gets to stay on the team. He’s actually decided to quit. As has been Wonder Man’s thing for a while, he just doesn’t enjoy the superhero life.

He’s always struggling with insecurity and dislike of throwing himself into deadly danger a dozen times a week.

In fact, he wasn’t too broken up when Henry Peter Gyrich kicked him off the team. Back when he got super into the idea of becoming an actor. He even said at time “If I can get used to playing roles on a stage - maybe I’ll feel more comfortable in my role as superhero!”

Except, as we saw in the Shadow Lord/Berserker two-parter, Wonder Man hasn’t gotten used to playing roles on a stage.

And we’ve seen that his Avengers responsibilities are getting in the way of his acting opportunities. So. Not a surprise he’s going to leave the team as long as the roster is being rearranged anyway.

Wonder Man asks if Beast likes that superhero life of facing death all the time.

Beast: “Frankly, I never really actually considered the possibility of dying... until a minute ago. But think of the fun, glamour and girls, Simon! This is the life!”

Wonder Man: “Is that stuff really enough for a guy as smart as you, Hank? The way I see it being a hero doesn’t make you a person any more than having power makes you a hero.”

Beast: “Yeah. But pigs make good pork chops so I’m staying!”

I’m not really sure what Simon is getting at here. I think its something about finding yourself?

As the time for the meeting draws minutes away, Completely Normal Doctor Donald Blake arrives at the mansion by cab. The cabdriver wondering what a guy like Blake is doing at Avengers Mansion. This Completely Normal Cab Driver is tempted to snoop but goes naw!

If he had snooped, he may have seen Completely Normal Doctor Donald Blake turn into the Mighty Thor and head into the mansion.

Here’s a funny thing, Thor claims that the reason why he talks to himself so much is out of protest that there’s just not enough heralds in Midgard to tell people how cool he is.

Thor: “Thus, the mortal facade is stripped away -- and thus, once again Thor treads the Earth! Thor, god of Thunder, Prince of Asgard! Thor, son of Odin! Bah! That the son of Odin must so proclaim himself -- ! Are there no heralds about? Nay... never when thou needest one! Unannounced, I enter this Earthly ‘mansion,’ poorer than the least dwelling in Asgard!”

Thor also wonders to himself that if he is chosen to take part in the new Avengers roster, will he choose to remain with them? One presumes he has a lot of Thor business going on. That’s why he left the team back when Moondragon was temping with them. She convinced him he was slumming by hanging with the Avengers.

OH. MEANWHILE. That Completely Normal Cab Driver?

He is seized by a strange compulsion. He parks his cab in an alley, takes off his clothes and -- MOON KNIGHT?

Inside, the Avengers are assembling for their meeting to find who is fired or not. Except they’ve decided to give the rinky conference room table a pass and are instead sitting around in a room with even fewer chairs and a table less conducive to holding a meeting.

Lateral move.

I’m wondering whether there was some miscommunication between writer and artist or what.

Cap tells the Avengers to find a place to sit (when there is only one visible chair) when Jarvis interrupts.

Moon Knight has shown up and demands to see the Avengers. And the automatic defenses that should have stopped him seem to have been switched off.

Moon Knight insists that the Avengers summoned him. That he was forced to come to the mansion. Which comes as news to the Avengers.

And then a whole bunch of other superheroes show up claiming that they were also forced to come here.

Hi Hercules, Hawkeye, Black Widow, Angel, Yellowjacket, Dazzler, Tigra, Black Panther, and Iceman!

So that explains the cover.

Wow, a cover that didn’t even lie!

There’s a hustle and bustle of the various superheroes complaining about being here because they had better things to be doing. Black Panther is late for a meeting to speak with the UN Security Council!

And Dazzler complains because its too cold to sit next to Iceman. And Iceman is just like ‘it be like that.’

Oh and Tigra seems to decide to get in some impromptu yoga. Don’t know what the deal with that is. But cats be like that sometimes.

Moon Knight sees all these heroes here and comes to the conclusion that this is some weird Avengers membership drive. But he is very not interested in this!

Yeah, I don’t know that a mysterious vigilante who mostly operates in the shadows would be a good match for a public superhero team.

Cough.

Iceman too is like sorry but I’m not into the hero stuff. I was on the Champions. I did my time!

So he and Moon Knight turn to leave. Iceman saying he’s going to need to find a cab and Moon Knight clearing knowing that he’s going to be picking up that fare.

But when they get near the door, the two freeze.

I realize that Iceman is involved so I mean that they suddenly stopped moving.

And they get super belligerent at each other and start fighting. With Iceman expositing about his skills. Which is normal for a comic. But seems a bit weird in the context of whats going on.

Iceman: “I feel compelled to explain how my X-Men training helped me to get the most out of my mutant ability to freeze the moisture in the air!”

And he freezes the ground under Moon Knight’s feet so he slips like a doofus.

But when he goes to finish the fight, Iceman’s head suddenly starts to hurt. Which he says is like someone else is in his head with him. He can’t think clearly enough.

While Iceman is distracted, Moon Knight throws some of his moonerangs at Iceman who blocks them. But neither can continue as the pain in their heads incapacitates them both.

Yellowjacket: “Wait a minute! I know who must be behind this! That arrogant self-styled g-- *uhh*”

And Yellowjacket freezes in place, as if in a trance.

The Avengers are concerned but Angel suddenly starts flying around the room, saying he can’t resist, he just has to flyyyyyy

Which apparently offends Tigra for some reason. Some mysterious reason. How mysterious.

Angel: “The Angel’s in the air! Watch me do my stuff!”

Tigra: “So, you think you’re pretty special, huh, Wings? Well, you’re just another bird to Tigra, the She-Cat -- and cats eat birds!”

Angel: “Sounds wild -- ! But you’ve got to catch me first!”

Tigra: “I will Bird-Man! I will -- with my nice, sharp claws! And, once I do, I’m plenty strong enough -- to tear your precious little wings right off!”

Eeeeeeeeesh. Well that’s retroactively a sore subject. Angel has his wings badly injured during the Mutant Massacre storyline and they end up amputated, sending him into a depression. And then stuff happens stuff happens, its his college roommate Cameron Hodges’ fault, Apocalypse gives Angel metal murder wings.

But in the here and now before that series of events, we must assume something similar to the sudden antagonism between Moon Knight and Iceman.

Something weird is going on and stating out loud that you’ve figured out what just gets you put in a trance.

Of course, I know what’s going on because I peeked ahead so I’ll just go ahead and tell you its M- *uhh*

Hahah, just kidding! Can you imagine, though? Anyway, its Moondragon.

She’s lurking behind the Avengers watching them watch this nonsense. They don’t notice her because she’s decided she doesn’t want them to. Until she does.

But before that, hey, time to call out Beast.

Beast: “Hey-- ! That’s not a costume! Tigra’s for real! She’s like a cat ... covered with fur -- like me! I should be thrilled, I guess... But instead, I find it vaguely unsettling!”

Look, furries can’t judge furries for being furry. Its the law.

Anyway, Moondragon lets the Avengers notice her and they turn around and go ‘oh ffs its Moondragon’ more or less.

Moondragon: “I sensed your need for order... for organization! So I returned!”

Iron Man: “What?! What right do you have to interfere?”

Moondragon: “Why, divine right, naturally!”

You may not like her but you have to admire her confidence.

She recaps her backstory a bit, including her belief that she’s Actually A Goddess of Mind. Because she was raised by the demigods of Titan and she’s super psychic.

I’m not sure how super psychic. I don’t think she and Jean Grey, for example, have ever locked horns. And Jean Grey is kind of the byword for super psychic.

She’s at least psychic enough that she gave Daredevil his vision back. I think that’s psychic?

I do wonder how Moondragon stacks up on the Grey scale. But not enough that I want that kind of dick waving contest between the Avengers and X-Men. There’s enough of that already.

So after explaining how great she is the Avengers basically react with ‘oh ffs, we did not miss this’ and ask what this has to do with this circus.

Moondragon: “Come now, Iron Man! Who better than I to bring order to the tangled affairs of this company? When last I left this august assemblage, my status was still Avenger-on-call -- meaning that I would aid you in times of dire need! I am needed now! -- And so I am here!”

Iron Man: “Swell.”

I think I’ve actually missed her advanced state of arrogance. Or maybe I’m just charitably inclined to her because she and Phyla-Vell got back together and alive in the current Guardians of the Galaxy run.

Anyway, Hawkeye has not missed her advanced state of arrogance and decides to peace out. He’s got an actual paying job to do and he’s late for work because Moondragon dragged him out here.

Moondragon tells him he can go. FOR HIS FATE LEADS HIM AWAY FROM THE AVENGERS FOR NOW!

Hawkeye: “Baldy, if you’re so hot why couldn’t you figure that out without dragging me across town?”

Good point, Hawkeye.

Honestly? I think she did it to troll you.

Black Widow and Black Panther also take off. Black Panther to his UN thing and Black Widow back to her job with SHIELD.

Moondragon doesn’t stop them. So I’m guessing their fates also lead them away from the Avengers for now. But. Why bring them? They didn’t do anything?

Moondragon, were you just padding out the numbers for a more exciting cover? Dammit, Moondragon!

Hawkeye is Hawkeye and thus extra extra so he shoots a suction cup arrow at a helicopter to hitch a ride instead of taking a taxi. And as he dangles from it, he muses melancholic about what Black Widow and he once had. And ironically, Black Widow is also thinking about him and sure that he doesn’t care for her anymore.

Womp womp.

Inside the mansion, Moondragon decides to continue, to the protests of Thor, Iron Man, and Captain America.

So she yells SILENCE! and paralyzes them, just like with Yellowjacket.

The assorted crowd of everyoen else fusses and wonders what to do but Moondragon takes charge and demands that Dazzler show her stuff.

Or rather:

Moondragon: “You use your gift frivolously... as part of a musical act! Please demonstrate!”

That’s... a way to request that, yes.

Dazzler doesn’t like her tone but decides to demonstrate anyway. Cranking her pocket radio and converting the sound waves into a dazzling light show.

Dazzler: “I.... uh. Also skate! Not much of a power, huh?”

Moondragon: “Hmm! Greater than you suspect... but i sense that your desire to be a minstrel is deep and sincere!”

Minstrel? Really? Psychics have no excuse for not knowing the right word.

I’m getting a real mixed vibe from Moondragon talking to Dazzler. Its like she’s being condescending and complimentary at the same time.

But since she senses that Dazzler just wants to do disco stuff, she tells her that she can go.

Dazzler isn’t sure whether to leave the Avengers to deal with this or as she thinks “Baldy’s rap sounds real cool but this scene is definitely tense!” but Scarlet Witch tells her it will be alright.

So Dazzler goes. “When the Scarlet Witch says go -- I go!”

Dazzler knows the score.

With Dazzler gone, Moondragon is like ‘welp lets get back on with it’ but Scarlet Witch has had it.

Scarlet Witch: “Enough! We demand that you cease this outrage! We can make our own decisions.”

Moondragon: “Can you? Some of you would choose to stay out of force of habit... or loneliness... or fear of failure in the world beyond these walls! You are children! It is far better that I choose!”

And now Iron Man has had enough. And has also had an idea.

While his body may have been paralyzed by Moondragon, a lot of his armor functions are thought activated because, hey, I don’t see a lot of buttons on him, do you?

So all he has to do is think WHOOOSHy thoughts and WHOOOSH he goes, flying through the ceiling of Avengers Mansion. For once, it is Tony Stark who destroys Tony Stark’s home.

And once he’s outside Avengers Mansion, he is apparently far enough outside her range that he can now move. And since “brainwaves are electromagnetic in nature” he turns on his built-in transceiver to emit a microwave psionic jamming signal.

Which is something that he just can do!

The effect of which is that it’ll make Moondragon “feel like she’s got static on every channel!”

Sure!

Kind of reminds me of the First Foundation’s anti-psychic defenses they made against the Second Foundation. Ah, classic sci-fi. Sometimes it teaches us things like how to fight specifically Moondragon.

Moondragon is sure that she can overcome the jamming if she can just regain her concentration but...

With psychic frequencies jammed, the paralyzed Avengers start to spring into action.

So she just puts up a force field. Projected from her spaceship in Earth orbit and activated with a remote control in her glove.

Aside from the other things I’ve given Moondragon, I’ll also give her this: she came prepared.

Moondragon: “Why must you resist me so? Why can you not simply acknowledge that you need my godly guidance? We are wasting valuable time! I have yet another group of candidates to summon... but I cannot dally here much longer!”

I really want to know who her B Squad would have been.

But with the Avengers trying to break down her force field and Iron Man swooping back in to help, Moondragon decides ‘hey fuck this actually’ and teleports away.

Moondragon: “By the braided ring! How naive... how foolish you are! Perhaps I am wasting my time on your petty affairs! All right then -- enough! Have it your way! I am needed elsewhere in the galaxy! Farewell!”

And she doesn’t die on the way back to her home planet.

I do like that she recontextualizes the scenario as being actually this is a waste of her time and she’s just throwing pearls before swine. She’s going to go somewhere that appreciates the work she’s doing out of the goodness of her heart.

She is horrible. And like with Emma Frost, I just kinda appreciate that in a character.

With Moondragon not here to force people to stay, Thor tells all the non-Avengers to fuck off. Not very gracious, Thor. They were forced to come.

Iceman leaves and reminds everyone and me that his life goal is actually to be an accountant. Something I’m surprised by every time I hear it.

He even offers to help the Avengers with their budgets or tax forms. Heck of a guy.

Angel also leaves but muses that he kind of hates to.

Angel: “I... sort of hate to leave! I haven’t really done much with my life since the Champions broke up! -- Besides hang around with the X-Men a little! I never thought about becoming an Avenger --! Maybe I ought to!”

This is the thought process that will probably lead him to form X-Factor and that road leads to Cameron Hodge and Angel becoming Archangel. Dammit, Moondragon!

Although, the X-Man I really want on an Avengers team is Cyclops. He’s so defined by being an X-Man and by being a leader of X-Men, I want to see what he does on a team that already has plenty of leaders. I want to see if he goes through a weird character transformation like Beast and becomes relentlessly chill.

Alas.

Anyway, Tigra speaks up and says “I gather that you guys weren’t really looking for new members, but now that I’m here... uh, any chance?”

Cap is dubious because he doesn’t know a thing about Tigra (except that he gave her clothes to Patsy Walker) but Hercules is like hey we all saw how she tried to beat up Moondragon, that shows she has mettle.

Plus, there are Avengers that Hercules knows nothing about, which is totally the same thing.

Hercules: “You, for instance! You are called Wonder Man, though in sooth, I know not why!”

Wonder Man: “Really? Well, I... I’m as strong as Thor... almost...”

Hercules: “Eh? What?! HAVE AT THEE, THEN!”

And then he punches Wonder Man through a wall.

God, I love Hercules.

And then he tries to wrassle him, just pleased as all get out that Wonder Man is still conscious after Hercules gave him a big punch. “What fun!”

Wonder Man is less pleased.

Wonder Man: “Why are you doing this? Why are you attacking me for no reason?”

Hercules: “Men must brawl to know one another! How better to learn the measure of a man -- ? And what greater gift can a man give another than the thrill, the glory, the joy of battle? I am a friendly fellow who would often give this gift -- but, alas, most mortals are too frail to receive it. You are not, though! You and I may batter freely!”

Hercules just wants to punch people to be friendly but poor guy is just too swole for most men. He needs a real sturdy friend to beat the shit out of.

Wonder Man squirms out of the wrassle and clocks Hercules through a different wall. As the Avengers just watch like ‘yup this is the kind of day this has been.’

Hercules is in good spirit about being clocked through a wall and decides that now he and Wonder Man are friends and that Wonder Man is truly worthy to be an Avenger.

Wonder Man sheepishly mentions that actually he was quitting to pursue a career in acting and WHY HERCULES LIKES THAT JUST AS WELL!

Hercules: “Acting? Why of late, Hercules has kept company with those mortals known as the ‘jet set.’ I know many producers and directors! Come, I’ll introduce you to them! And the women, friend Wonder Man!”

Captain America, bemused: “you meet some strange folks in this business.”

There’s an non-existent Wonder Man and Hercules Take Hollywood Buddy Comedy Book and its a crime that its non-existent.

Geez, Marvel. GEEZ.

Anyway, that’s Wonder Man gone. Out of one buddy comedy into another.

Tigra reminds the Avengers that she’s still here and still wants to be in the Avengers.

Tigra: “Yeah... uh, back to my little problem... I’ve been at loose ends for a while... and I really want to belong somewhere! I know I could cut it as an Avenger! Please?”

This time, the objection is that the Avengers just don’t have room for a new person. They were trying to pare back! Not recruit!

But Beast interjects and reveals he is also leaving.

Beast: “Wondy and I had a talk this morning that started me thinking -- and I hate to admit it, but a couple of things Moondragon said hit home! You know, I used to be a scientist! I used to have a future besides my next gag and tomorrow night’s date! I want to see if there’s anything left of Hank McCoy besides a ‘blue-furred buffoon!’“

Hank’s early character beats on the Avengers were him struggling to find what his place on the team would be. He couldn’t be the strongest with Iron Man or Thor on the team. He couldn’t be the smartest with Iron Man again, Black Panther, or Yellowjacket. Wonder Man joining the team. Wonder Man joining the team gave Beast someone to be there for and with. But mostly Beast’s tenure has been kind of... party time for him. He’s been the fun member of the team. Going out to parties and juggling multiple dates and telling jokes.

Its been a fun time for Beast but he’s not really been living up to his potential And there were times he could have become the scientist on the team again. Or helped as one. Yellowjacket hasn’t been on the team as a core member for a bit. But he stuck in his role as the team clown.

Like with Thor, Moondragon has convinced Beast that he’s been sort of slumming it with the Avengers and now he’s gotta go rethink his character.

Where does this lead him? Why, he’s going to join the Defenders! And going to try to get that non-team team more organized like a team team. Is this a good thing? I don’t know, I haven’t read a lot of Defenders! Hopefully the Defenders podcast I listen to gets to that point soon!

But Beast isn’t the only one Moondragon has swayed.

Vision and Scarlet Witch likewise announce that they’re quitting the Avengers.

Vision: “Perhaps we will not succeed in finding a place among ordinary people -- but we must try!”

So perhaps influenced as well by the conversation Wanda had with Jan where Wasp wasn’t worried about losing her spot on the team. Which Wanda attributed to Jan having a life outside the Avengers. And apparently Wanda and Vision have been afraid to try for that. Until Moondragon dunked on her for it.

Geez. If there’s anything Moondragon is good at, its getting Avengers to quit the team. She got Thor and Hellcat last time. This time she got Beast, Vision, and Scarlet Witch.

So there’s room for Tigra now but also too much room. They were aiming for six and even with Tigra, they’d only have FIVE THERES ONLY FIVE CLEARLY.

Jocasta, in the background: -saddest robot in the world-

Yellowjacket shrugs and decides to rejoin as a full-time member to get the number up to six. His research hasn’t been going great lately anyway so he has time in his schedule.

Feeling overlooked, just like last issue, which was a filler which was supposed to address the Avengers overlooking her, Jocasta decides to slink away. Just leaps out the window and runs away from home.

Jocasta: “They didn’t even notice me... didn’t count me! Was it an oversight? Or had everyone already made up their minds that I would be one of those eliminated? What difference does it make? I am nothing to them! They do not want me here! Maybe I’ll find someplace where I am wanted! Maybe I’ll find someone... who loves me!”

And where does Jocasta go from here?

She wanders the country looking for love, presumably in all the wrong places, and is seized by a per-programmed compulsion to rebuild Ultron. This leads to a big team up between the Thing, Machine Man, and her and Jocasta sacrifices herself to help stop Ultron. The Avengers hold a memorial and Machine Man attends, realizing that he had loved Jocasta.

So plus side: she does find someone to love her. Minus side: she dies and also its Machine Man.

Double plus side: she’s eventually rebuilt. Dies a couple more times. But she’s currently alive.

It’s going to turn out that this was a failure of communication.

(On the team less than a day after basically begging to join and she’s already made herself at home and is hogging the entire couch. How very cat of you, Tigra.)

Iron Man, Captain America, and Thor had decided privately to ask her to stay on as a Special Substitute Avenger, keep living in the mansion, and help out when its needed.

In the hubbub of Moondragon’s recruitment drive I guess they forgot to bring it up. I feel like its something you should have approached her with before the meeting, just to make sure she was okay with it.

Hindsight and all.

The snubbing from Vision definitely didn’t help.

Iron Man: “I hope she comes back! -- And I sure hope Moondragon doesn’t!”

Hah.

I do wonder what the initial plan going into the meeting would have been, before Moondragon took it over. What roster had Iron Man, Thor, and Captain America decided on before Moondragon talked three Avengers into quitting and introduced Tigra to the team?

I guess we’ll never knoooow.

Captain America muses that although it seems like they drove Moondragon away, she may have gotten what she actually wanted. “What if she used her mental powers subtly to influence the decisions that were made?”

And its possible because of how her speech influenced the three people who quit.

The thought just about makes Iron Man furious.

He doesn’t have time to dwell on it because the news shows up to get coverage of the last panel new roster AVENGERS ASSEMBLE! moment.

I do love a good last panel new roster Avengers Assemble moment.

And that was Jim Shooter’s first issue back. And a pretty great first issue too.

Not that the previous issues have been bad necessarily but he definitely brought a sense of fun to this issue. Even though there’s some forced fighting for those ACTION SCENES most of it is just character interactions. Even some of the pointless fights.

And like writers like to do when they take over a book, Jim Shooter draws a line in the history with a shake-up to the team roster. Reintroduces Moondragon into the book because he has unfinished business with her.

I’ve actually been reading the original Star Brand book by Shooter and the writing is night and day. Its all text text text words words words but its much punchier here. Though there are some strange spelling and punctuation choices.

Still, I’m excited to have a consistent writer back on and I’m even excited about it being Jim Shooter. I hated his first run on the book on first read and then appreciated it more the second time through. And I’ve heard interesting stuff about this upcoming run.

Psst, follow @essential-avengers. You are being mentally influenced by Moondragon to do so. Wait, this is a counterproductive self-promote. Er, like and reblog because you choose to?

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robotshibbins · 5 years ago

Text

June 13th, 3626

Never take solo assignments, that was always the advice senior officers told rookies.

Doesn’t matter if it’s the lower sectors, or the corporate capital, never take solo assignments.

Corporal Jameson T’kui, while not the most experienced security officer within DUNi’s private security force aboard the debt recovery station called Korju by its millions of inhabitants, knew this advice better than his own ass. Korju was not safe by any means: Junker gangs and mobs stole and slaughtered everywhere they went, an insidious parasite ruled the stations ever increasing amount of abandoned sectors, and the fires of revolution got warmer and warmer as the days passed. Going solo just made it more likely you’d return in a bodybag. Or not at all.

Though, when the order comes in from a DUNi executive, not a D-Sec commissioner, you had no choice. Read the briefing, sign the paperwork and liability contracts, gear up, say your goodbyes, go. That’s why T’kui found himself alone in a long dead sewer system, the bowels of an abandoned sector on the other side of the station, carrying nearly two kilograms of 5.56U and encased in a full combat hardsuit.

He waded through decade old, barely solid waste with audible disdain, the maintenance paths being blocked off by debris or immobile colonies of parasitic ooze, called Nirah. They fascinated the officer in their grotesque nature: massive walls of pulsating slime, colored like mucus with colors of gore flecked throughout its mass. Strange organs twitched within the walls, hair like growths reached out of the slime, slowly quivering at the cold, foul air. Occasionally, they’d move towards T’kui, and at that point he’d quickly move away from them.

His assignment was seen as rather important by his corporate overlords. During a diplomatic visit by another fintech company, Hans-Ti’koiji, an important official went missing. She was a CFO or something, the officer wasn’t entirely sure nor did he care, it wasn’t important to the job. But, she was missing for nearly two months, and Hans-Ti’Koiji was threatening a massive lawsuit against DUNi if she wasn’t found. At the very least, her remains would be all that’s necessary to prevent a huge loss to the company.

T’kui had no involvement with the case prior to this, so he had zero clue as to why he was even chosen for this. He had riot control experience, and performed a few raids on various possible rebel bases of operations, but none of that had any real bearing on the assignment: Searching for someone who’s very likely dead, in an abandoned sector, clearly infested by Nirah. This was something they should’ve hired a slime-scorcher for, maybe give the guy an escort if some Junkers tried to ambush them at most. The officer had no insight into the thoughts of a corporate exec, so he had no clue why they thought this was a good idea.

What DUNi says is law…

For the nearly two hours he had been down there, T’kui hadn’t heard anything too strange. It was little more than the hum of atmospherics and the groan of settling structures. So, when he heard a very organic sounding gurgle, he stopped dead in his tracks, and brought his rifle to a readied position. He moved his rifle and the flashlight attached to its handguard side to side, scanning the area and hoping to see the source of the growl. Nothing, at least in this area, it sounded like it was coming from a bit farther down, past a T-junction.

The officer began his trek again, trying to make as little noise as possible. He never encountered Nirah before this job, and he’d heard plenty of horror stories from officers of what those “Oozed” became: Shambling horrors, their faces melted and brains fuzed with the creature’s primitive one, shrugging off high caliber rounds and even lost limbs, unshaken in their assault. This mental image, along with a fear of not knowing exactly what the hell he would face, shook T’kui to his very core. His whole body quaked with fear, he struggled to keep his breath under control, he began to jump at every slightly out of place sound, and the already difficult terrain became even harder. He misjudged one of his steps through the foul sludge, and he tripped. A yelp, hidden from the outside world thanks to his helmet, followed by a crash into the concrete walls.

A loud crash.

He heard the thing gurgle again. No, it was less of a gurgle and more of a wet shriek. It sounded angry, agitated that its slumber was disturbed. As T’kui heard the thing wading towards him, he got back into a combat-ready position, aiming his rifle at the tunnel ahead, waiting for the beast to come towards him. Eventually, it walked out of the darkness, and into the beam of light provided by the officer’s flashlight. It was a gruesome sight.

It was another human, female from the looks of it, wearing pretty standard garb for a Korju resident: A cheap, branded T-Shirt, and some worn jeans. The thing looked… almost normal from the chest down. Disheveled, yes, covered in muck and grime from being in the sewer for gods know how long. Her skin looked extremely pale, however, once a dark shade, now drained of any circulation. Then there were the wounds in her abdomen, stab and gunshot wounds. Her fingers were in tatters, too, nails cracked and skin missing from the edges. She looked dead from that alone, she shouldn’t have been standing up like that. Then, the officer focused on her face… where one should’ve been.

A glob of Ooze was wrapped around the front of her head, trails of slime seeping down from its pulsating body and onto her dead skin, mixing with the dried blood drenching her. Nearly the entire front of her head, save for a chunk of the skull, was gone, reduced to nothing by the Ooze’s acidic properties. T’kui’s flashlight barely illuminated the remaining eye socket through the crimson mass, much less anything further within its gelatinous form. Sensory hair twitched on the surface of the slime, trying to find out where that sound came from. The only thing that really remained of her face was her jaw, which randomly twitched and quivered at unseen stimuli.

The Oozed jerked suddenly with a gibbering sound, looking off in a random direction. It didn’t seem to react to T’kui’s flashlight, which was nice, but the whole sight unsettled the man nonetheless. It jerked around again, and made a shaky step towards him, causing T’kui to readjust his rifle. The polymer stock impacted his steel armor, making another loud clack, which alerted the creature standing about 30 meters away.

The thing made another shriek, and bolted towards T’kui in an erratic fashion. A hidden curse, followed by four echoing discharges from his rifle. Three hit the Oozed in its chest, the other hit it right in the jaw. In spun around, another chunk of its host’s face gone, and smacked into the sludge they stood in, slowly seeping into it. T’Kui stood still for a moment, before slowly approaching it. The Oozed jerked up once again with a wet wheezing sound, and tried gunning for the officer again. Three more rounds were fired, all impacting its head. The Nirah Ooze exploded in a gory fashion, wet chunks flew in every direction as it literally popped from the rounds hitting it. Its host seized up, her arms reached for what little remained of her cranium, and she fell back into the sludge, finally dead.

T’Kui stared at the corpse, cursing more and more. He’d seen people survive-

No, no this wasn’t a person, it was already a corpse before he shot it, being puppeteered by a chunk of slime. Barely any of his prior experience applied here. Checking corners, situational awareness, reaction time, all the basic combat applied, but none of the minutiae did. The officer was horribly out of his element, and that landed on top of him like a bag of bricks. His heart kicked up again, another bout of anxiety hit him.

Why the fuck did they send me down here? Why alone? Do they even know she’s here? Those fucking suits barely briefed me!

His thoughts were cut off by more snarls from beyond the darkness. The officer stood still for a moment, before his composure was snapped in two by stress and utter fear. He swiveled around towards the direction he came, and booked it. He’d rather take a bullet to the head over whatever awful things these monsters had in store, at least it’d be quick. However, his foot snagged on something, and he fell to his knees. More expletives as he attempted to crawl out of the muck, which only drove him deeper down into the shallow mass. T’kui’s pace quickened with his already high heart rate, which only caused him to stumble more. He could hear the horde, its hungry gurgles and snarls grew closer and closer.

He then got a proper foothold, and stood. Promptly, he continued fleeing. His pace was slow, the goop seeming to grow thicker and thicker, though it might’ve been fatigue. He hastily dropped some of his magazines, letting them be consumed by the ever hungry sludge he waded through. T’kui soon came upon another junction, and his panicked mind struggled to remember which way he came from. It decided he came from his right, and he hurried into the tunnel as fast as he could. Slowly, he realized something wasn’t right, the scenery was off. Ooze covered damn-near everything. The ceiling, the walls, it even grew on top of the sludge. This… no there can’t have been this much, I t-

Then something from the darkness lept at him, and he couldn’t see out of his visor.

T’kui fell back with a thud and a scream. His hands grabbed at whatever covered his visor on reflex, and it felt… gelatinous. The smell of burning plastic began to fill his nose, and a terrified scream, desperate for salvation, filled his helmet.

He tried to claw the Ooze off the visor, but his hands barely budged, they were stuck to its body. The officer kept trying, his hands and fingers howling in intense pain as the suit’s melted material burnt his flesh, and the slime began to eat through it all. Soon he couldn’t feel them, he wasn’t even sure if they were still there. Then something fell onto his cheek, and it burned. Another scream, his agony induced flailing brought down by the sludge’s adhesive hold. Soon, he lost his sight, but he could still feel the Ooze slowly falling onto his face through the ruins of his helmet, he could feel everything flare up in pain before it faded into numbness. Then, the officer felt the same sensation roll down his screaming throat. A muffled gag, and one last jerk to try and get the parasite off.

And then, everything went quiet, and T’kui was still.

#Solo Assignment #journey verse #korju station #scifi writing #scifi horror #body horror #writing #horror writing

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