#guys i’ve had tumble for YEARS but this is my first post | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

martinsluvr · 1 year ago

Text

coffee and basketball

pairing: kate martin x fem reader! 2022-2023 season!

warnings: fluff! friends to lovers trope!? small mention of drinking! mentions of anxiety/fear of love!

authors note: pls be gentle this is my first fic

—

dec 5th 2022 ~ post iowa win against iowa state (dec 4th). score 70-57. kate martin with 13 points.

reader’s pov

the energy in iowa city was booming after last night’s win. i’ve been working at this coffee shop in iowa city since my freshman year of college and i’ve become accustomed to talking “game talk” my entire shift the day after a game, and if any of the players decide to stop in to do homework or for a quick drink, i sympathize as i watch them get trapped into nonstop conversations about basketball. iowa city is extremely proud of and cherishes our women’s basketball team, and quite frankly you never hear the end of it when you’re living here.

our coffee shop gets quite busy everyday, and my shift passes by with ease. as i’m finishing making the last order i took before clocking out, i see two familiar blondes walk in.

“hiiii!!! great game you guys!! your usuals today?”

“hey y/n thank you, yes please! how are you? when are you actually going to come to a game in person!” monika exclaimed. after working here for so long, we’ve developed a genuine friendship, sometimes catching up for a drink or just enjoying each other’s company in our apartments.

“i know, i know.. i promise i will before the season ends!” i laughed as i made their drinks. “kate, you did really good last night, i really wish i could’ve been there”.

i could see kate blushing out of the corner of my eye as I finished making their drinks, and monika nudging her. “y/n i am going to drag you to the next home game myself, kate always looks around and hopes you’re the-“ monika was interrupted by kate obnoxiously faking a cough attack. i laughed, blushing and handed them their drinks. as i handed kate her drink, our fingertips slightly touched and we made eye contact.

“in the meantime maybe we can go to open gym tonight? i can rebound for you and give you time to reenact some of your moves from the game for me” i said as i smiled up at kate with my eyebrows raised. although i was NOT short, yet kate disagrees, she was still 8 inches taller than me as I stood at 5’4. “we can meet at my apartment at 6 if you’re up for it”.

kate knew what i was doing. i knew what i was doing.

kate’s pov

my palms were immediately sweating. i looked down at her and honestly just forgot every single thing she’s said since i walked in because i cannot stop looking at her eyes and how well they compliment her dark hair, she just dyed it - i can tell. My eyes scan over her exposed tattoos on her arm and i quickly look back into her eyes so i don’t look like more of a creep than i already do.

“6pm is good. i’ll be there. at 6”, i tried playing it cool. she laughed, shaking her head and saying her quick goodbyes as she had to rush to her 2 o’clock class.

“you know you said 6 twice. i think she knew what time considering SHE asked YOU” monika explained while almost tumbling over laughing. “i mean kate, you should’ve seen your face. you two have been doing this for a year now. why have you not made a move on her? she’s clearly interested in you”

i sighed, “monika I don’t know. i really do like her but it’s just scary. i don’t know if i can commit to something, especially right now. basketball is our life and how will someone ever be able to fall in love with me if i can only see them for a few hours a week?” monika rubbed my shoulder and brought me in for a hug.

“just because you are a D1 athlete does not mean this is your entire life. you still deserve to have a life outside of basketball, and if anyone, she would be the most understanding” monika said, “you’ve got to make a move before she gives up. i know she’s into you kate. you deserve to feel and be loved”.

she really always was right.

we spent the rest of the day doing homework together and making lunch. as it got closer to 6, i could feel the knots in my stomach getting worse. luckily, we lived in the same apartment complex so it was a quick walk to her apartment.

5:55pm and i’m already at her door. is that too early? too desperate?

i knock a few times to let her know i’m here. i could just say i came early so i could see her cats

i looked down twiddling my thumbs, patiently waiting.

“coming!” i heard faintly from her apartment. she opened the door and quickly embraced me.

“kate hi! i just have to feed my cats before we leave so just come in for a minute” she said while frantically trying to feed her cats before they tried jumping into the food. i stepped into her apartment and patiently waited, laughing as her cats were jumping up her legs and meowing.

“you know, i’ve always been a dog person but i love your cats. they are just so adorable and have such a personality” i remarked.

“hah yeah, you can take them whenever. they are the best for cuddling but feeding them is still terrifying” she laughed.

she collected her bag, which i offered to hold, her water bottle and keys. we locked up her apartment and walked down to her car.

“midnights?” we asked in unison, both laughing after realizing we jinxed each other. i adore that she loves taylor swift almost as much as i do. i plugged in my phone to her aux and shuffled the album. as we started driving to our practice gym, i couldn’t help but steal glances at her, imagining what it would be like if we were more than friends, if i wasn’t so scared, i thought. i wouldn’t be afraid to hold her hand or her thigh while one of us drives. i wouldn’t be afraid to kiss her at every red light. i wouldn’t be afraid of love with her.

we pulled into the parking lot and i quickly grabbed both of our bags, and we made our way inside. no one had the practice gym booked for tonight, so it was just us. i put in my code to enter the gym, and we settled our stuff down.

“so.. what are we doing today coach kate” she smiled widely at me. i grinned and grabbed the rack of basketballs, pulling it next to the free throw line.

“well, let’s work on some free throw shots first”.

reader’s pov

after an hour of rebounding for kate and even taking some shots for myself, i decided to line myself up at the free throw line. i was never one to play sports, but i’ve always loved watching them. i’ve always been so jealous of people’s hand-eye coordination, as it never seemed to work for me which led to me burying myself in studies and clubs for years.

i try to fix my form like kate taught me, then launched it.

miss.

again, i grabbed another ball and launched it.

miss.

and again, and again. miss. miss. miss.

kate stifled a laugh watching me, and as i turned to glare at her she put her arms up in surrender.

“here, let me help you. we’ve already gone over this y/n, are you missing on purpose?” she questioned. i shook my head, my breath getting faster the closer she got to me. i faced the basket with the ball in my hands hoping to hide my blush.

“here, move over a little” kate said as she put her hands on my waist, moving me to the right a little. “now put your right hand here, and your left hand here” she said as she guided my hands from behind. all i could focus on was her breath on my neck and how close our bodies were without touching. “now shoot”

straight net.

“see! you can do it! but, can you guard me?” she questioned as she quickly knocked the new ball out of my hands, dribbling away from me.

“kate, of course i can guard you” i laughed chasing after her. we played 1 on 1 for a few minutes, her scoring on me multiple times and me not even able to keep the ball in my hands for more than a minute. as i jumped up to block her shot, i tumbled over her as we both fell to the ground. her arms were quick to grab my waist to ensure i fell on her instead of the hard wood court.

“kate!” i exclaimed laughing, “you could’ve hurt yourself and lisa would have actually hunted me down and killed me!”

we were both laughing as i rolled off of her and laid next to her on the ground. she turned over to look at me with a wide smile. we grabbed each other’s hands as we helped each other up, yet i stumbled into her again.

“a little clumsy tonight aren’t we?” she teased. her hands hesitant to continue holding my waist as we stood centimeters apart.

“i guess you just make me a little nervous” i confidently stated. our eyes stayed locked in for a minute, and for a split second i swore i saw her look at my lips, until she quickly pulled away almost breaking out in a sprint to our bags.

“we should get going, the janitors will be here soon to start locking up” she hurriedly said.

with a heavy sigh, i walked towards the exit grabbing my keys and water bottle as we made our way to the exit.

the car ride to the apartment complex was silent. i felt uneasy. is it me? is she just not into me? i thought. as i pulled in to my spot, kate offered to walk me back up to my apartment. the walk was long,

and silent. as i got to my door, i pulled out my key as fast as i could to unlock the door. “thank you for walking me kate, goodnight” i said as i tried rushing into my apartment. before i could shut my door, she put her hand out to hold it open”

“wait y/n,” she hesitated, “there’s been something i’ve been meaning to do for a while now”. kate strides towards me, reaching out to put one hand on my hip and one hand on my check, quickly pulling me up towards her and before i knew it, she kissed me.

she really kissed me.

her lips were soft. i could feel our smiles through the kiss and my heart nearly beating out of my chest, i wonder if she felt it too. kate pulled away first, looking down at me smiling, moving both hands to my cheeks.

“goodnight y/n” she said as she kissed my forehead. she backed away towards the door, and left before i could say a word.

i sheepishly slid my back down the cold wooden front door and made my way down to the floor. between the heat on my cheeks, tingling sensation on my lips, and the sound of my heartbeat thumping through my chest, nothing else in the world mattered in that moment. i delicately brought my finger to my lips, trying to relive the feeling through the sensations. my cheeks were hot and hurting. 'have I ever smiled this big in my life?', I thought. my legs slightly shaking as i slowly got up, making my way through my apartment to my bedroom. everything was bright even with all of my lights off. i sat down at my vanity, staring at myself in the mirror. through the slight shine of the exposed moonlight, i could see the red and pink flush all over my face. my phone buzzed in my sweater pocket.

i had a great time, the text read, see you tmrw for my usual? :)

i held the phone to my chest tightly, feeling the coldness of the screen through my clothes, but nothing else was cold. everything was warm because she kissed me.

#kate martin #kate martin imagines #iowa wbb #iowa hawkeyes #wcbb

132 notes · View notes

atmilliways · 2 years ago

Text

Wrong On The Money (1-3)

parts 1, 2, & 3 of ?? | 888 words | Teen+

Blackmail fic on Ao3 | on tumblr

Summary:

Wayne is sick and they don't have the money for the treatment he needs. Eddie, desperate and spread thin between school, a part time job, and dealing, spots Steve outside of a gay club and opts for blackmail. Steve, who has heard about Wayne through Dustin... just sort of lets him.

I started writing this while Ao3 is down. Haven't quite finished it yet, but I've got 6.7k written so far, so I should be able to do daily posts for at least a while!

Now also posted on Ao3.

Quick note, if it helps anyone who might be hit too close to home by Wayne's serious but relatively brief health scare. First, he's going to be fine. I love Wayne, I wouldn't do that to him. Second, Dustin's mind goes straight to cancer when he hears that it's serious serious, but Wayne's illness is never specified. The only symptoms described are basically a cough and general weakness/fatigue.

Dustin is really upset one day after school, the day he tells Steve about his dad.

Steve had never asked, alright? It was family shit, and that kind of thing was. . . . Well, not sacred, he can’t even think that and keep a straight face, but definitely private. There could’ve been any number of reasons why Mr. Henderson wasn’t around.

Turns out it was cancer.

And . . . it’s not insensitive to wonder, right? Steve doesn't know if it’s an anniversary or if someone’s been giving him shit at school about not having a dad or something. So, after a few bumbling questions about why this is upsetting him now, an explanation comes tumbling out.

The leader or president or whatever of the nerd club Dustin joined at the start of the year had to cancel their game this week. “Eddie never cancels, Steve,” Dustin insists, eyes red from crying and voice gone all squeaky. “And we were giving him shit about it, we all were, even the upperclassmen guys, and he. . . he j-just broke, Steve. Said his uncle is r-really sick, bad sick, and I know what that means. They don’t have the money for treatment. He’s Eddie’s only family, and he’s probably going t-to. . . .”

Steve regrets dropping Robin off at her house first today. She might not know what to say either, but at least they’d be in this together. “Dust, that’s. . . . That’s awful.”

Turns out he doesn’t have to say anything else, because Dustin thumps against him and bawls his eyes out.

“It was awful, Robs,” Steve says, rubbing a hand over his eyes as he talks into the phone. “I haven’t seen him like that since after Starcourt, when we had to tell him about Hop.”

Robin’s wince is audible in her reply. “Yeah, that's. . . . That’s pretty bad.”

“Yeah.” He heaves a sigh, hoping it’ll get some of the constricted feeling out of his chest. It doesn’t.

“Steve? Are you okay?”

“I don’t know.” It’s just, he hates it. Hated it then and hates it now, because both times there’s no way for him to jump between Dustin and this thing. “Everything was starting to sort of feel okay again, and then suddenly there's Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson and his uncle, who I’ve never even seen in my life—”

“It’s not about the Munsons, Steve,” Robin says gently. “You and Dustin have that ‘you die I die’ thing. He’s like your kid brother who annoys the shit out of you, but you love him to death anyway. And right now he’s sad but you can’t do anything to help.”

Lifting his face from his hand, Steve looks around the room. He’s on the big comfortable couch in his big fucking house with too many rooms, all empty except for this one. His parents are never home, always away on business trips that got way more frequent after Barbara Holland disappeared from a party he’d hosted. They send money—not an allowance, not since he didn’t get into any of the colleges he’d applied to. But the utility bills are always paid up, and a gardener still comes around to do lawn maintenance every other week.

He wonders how the cost of maintaining a house they don’t live in compares to the cost of whatever kind of treatment Munson’s uncle needs.

Doesn’t let himself wonder if it would make a difference, but he knows that treatments don’t always work. It hadn’t, apparently, for Dustin’s dad.

“Yeah,” Steve agrees heavily. “I know.”

The nice thing about being done with high school and working weekends at a shitty retail job is, Steve can do whatever he wants on some weekdays. As long as he doesn’t have a shift that starts before noon the next day, anyway. Which he doesn’t.

So, a few days after Dustin’s revelations, Steve drives up to the nearest outskirts of Indy. Eventually he ends up in one of those clubs that he and Robin have been researching how to find.

He tells himself that he’s scoping it out before he brings her, but he wants to get lost for a while. Empty his head out of things he can’t do a damn thing about—the Upside Down, the monsters, the Russians, the Munsons, the memories of Dustin crying and, just for funsies, of Nancy calling him bullshit. Because that’s always somewhere in the mix, these days.

Fill it back up with music and movement. Not with drinks, because he still has to get himself back to Hawkins in one piece.

He goes and he dances and he sweats. Sometimes guys dance with him, and Steve goes with it. Who cares? No one knows him here, it doesn’t mean anything.

Turns out, it does mean something after all.

When Steve finally stumbles his way out of the club, he finds none other than Eddie Munson sitting on the hood of the Beemer he’s been buying off of his parents in installments. (Their idea. It’s a ‘pay for it or lose it’ kind of deal.)

The buzzing under his sweat-tacky skin—satisfaction at successfully getting out of his head—fizzles out. He keeps walking and stops when he draws even with the car.

Eddie Munson, looking tired and prickling with restless energy, and exhales a cloud of smoke and vapor into the chilly air. “Hey, man. What’s a nice boy like you doing in a place like this?”

#steddie blackmail fic #steddie #steddie fic #stranger things fic #slow burn #steve harrington #dustin henderson #robin buckley #eddie munson #protective older brother steve harrington #steve harrington has bad parents #my fanfic

129 notes · View notes

flagbridge · 9 months ago

Text

Raoul de Chagny uniform inspiration, and general Raoul Navy musings

élève-officier ("elof") at the Borda in Brest, 1880s.

British Sub-Lieutenant (equivalent of an Ensign in the US or French Navies), approximately 1860 (by Ann Mary Newton)

Graduating students and faculty of L'Ecole Navale on board the Boarda, 1891

As some of you know, I love writing Raoul. My next projects after All Vows ends are mostly Raoul-centered, and I'm pretty deep in my research. I’ve tumbled absolutely headlong into researching La Baille (nickname for the French naval academy), and it’s amusing how across time and distance, so much of initial military training is unchanged. Even though I cosplay Christine, Raoul actually ends up being the character who I give most of my own life experience because I am, in fact, a Sailor. When I'm writing Raoul POV about being at sea, I sometimes use my own journal entries from past deployments when I was underway on the USS NEVERSAIL somewhere in the middle of the Indian Ocean.

I get a lot of questions about Raoul's uniform, so I'm sharing some of the above (hello talented artists, could we PLEASE get more Raoul Navy Phanart, I am BEGGING YOU)

élève-officier ("elof") at the Borda in Brest, 1880s.

This is exactly what Raoul's midshipman uniform would have looked like. As you can see from the photo from 1891, the uniform from that time and even a decade later is the same. Naval uniforms, especially dress uniforms change very infrequently. My dress uniform that I wear in 2024 is the same one that was designed by Mainbocher in 1941!

The term "élève-officier" translates literally to "student-officer", although most translate it as "officer candidate", which isn't inaccurate. They were then classified by year, so a first year student would be an élève-officier fourth class. However, the British and American term for a naval cadet is a "midshipman" which is often abbreviated to "mid". So "elof" is basically directly translated to "mid". However, there was an additional naval trainee rank, called "Aspirant". This was assigned to the naval cadets when they embarked for their tour du monde on actual warships. It's a unique rank that's basically a desgination that the individual is a senior at the academy--like a "Midshipman First Class", the term to describe seniors at the US Naval Academy.

2. British Sub-Lieutenant (equivalent of an Ensign in the US or French Navies), approximately 1860 (by Ann Mary Newton)

I couldn't find a good picture of a young/junior officer from this era in the French Navy but FUN FACT! The French Navy underwent a uniform shift in 1883. The officer uniform was largely unchanged, however, that short coat and triangular hat that we often associate with the end of the age of sail was phased out as a dress uniform. So it's possible that Raoul had a dress uniform very much like this around the time of Phantom of the Opera, but it was on its way out. The rank is accurate though! So if Raoul went to the opera in uniform in about 1881? This is what he would have looked like.

3. Graduating students and faculty of L'Ecole Navale on board the Borda, 1891

The uniforms were the same when Raoul would have graduated, and that is the Borda that is mentioned in the book. In my head this is Raoul's senior class photo (even though it's 10 years later), complete with a few guys who have no idea what's going on and aren't looking at the camera.

PotOmer Day 15: HEADCANON/Raoul Navy Uniform Musings

Between April 23 and June 11, I am posting 49 days of POTO content to mark the Omer, except on Shabbat. Previous days below the cut line.

Day 14: GIFSET-Ethan Freeman bows to the monkey.

DAY 13: LEROUX: HAPPY BIRTHDAY GASTON LEROUX (Ethan Freeman Reads Leroux)

Day 12: FANFIC: All Vows Chapter 38: my longfic that will be concluding at the end of May.

Day 11: (no post, Shabbat)

Day 10: FANFIC: All Vows Chapter 10 (Catch Up)

Day 9: ADAPTATION: Ghost of Zariya Hollow

Day 8: HEADCANON: Christine's Swedish Accent

Day 7: COSPLAY Hannibal Slave Girl Bodice Construction

Day 6: GIFSET: Raouls who make choices appreciation post

Day 5: PHIC UPDATE: All Vows Chapter 37! (And a bonus gif of Lily and Jon)

Day 4: (No post, Shabbat)

Day 3: GIFSET: Cape Twirl Comparison, Current West End Phantoms ('23-'24)

Day 2: BRAINWORM: "Ne Me Touchez Pas"

Day 1: GIFSET Robyns/Kerhoas: The Kiss

#potomer #phantom of the opera #poto #raoul navy #naval history #raoul de chagny #raoulcore #maritime history #the raoul navy #am wrting #research #queued

28 notes · View notes

vivianbernadetteaurora · 1 year ago

Text

Heroin addiction hello,

this is me my name is heroin, I am more expensive than gold, but you will pay more for me. I’m like a diamond you want me you you wanna wear me you wanna wear me all over your body you wanna be me you wanna be inside my body, you want me to take the pain away like a hug like a hug used to do like a kiss like being in love used to, my name is Cherry and I’m a heroin addict I’m not some 12 stepper I kind of wish I was so I kind of wish I didn’t get the vibe that it was a cult , but maybe it is but who said all Colts are bad well this person right here was see. I’m also autistic I have a strong time of the past, I’ll tell you what this addiction has taken everything away from me. Let’s go back and let’s go back to 10 years ago. Roughly let’s go to the 3rd of December 2012 when I met this man who to this day, I can’t get out of my head see this man��️ introduced me to this awful awful thing, but at the same time he kept me away distance control. Yes I get it on the first night I met this man me off my feet. I was telling him about my situation ship and he was very compassionate. He was very understanding and it sort of Started there and went on the next five years, I was hooked line and sinker .

So the first night I met this man he was with my friend I met with, and I can still tell you everything about it that night it had to be one of the best nights of my life as I sit here now with tears in my eyes, five years later, I remembering things when I write, I wanted to be writer when I write I want to I remember And I started my life story again I’ve been with him for awhile see you inspired me be a bad person being with me and made me wanna be better and we had this little secret but let’s go back to the question because I’m very good at track no drugs happened it was just drinking Maybe smoking weed because I did back then but I was just talking it was like talking to someone I’d know my whole life and when you’re autistic this doesn’t happen often I hadn’t been diagnosed then but he had both bonded over the fact that we both had personality disorders and that we didn’t fit into society boxes, but now as I see it, I see it. I do but This man had a complete control over me. He had literally just had a baby with somebody who he’d been with for 10 years. He told me it was over, but yet they just had a baby a month prior premature, I didn’t want to take this woman’s man I didn’t want to take away this father, so I said don’t chase me, so on the days that he saw his child up at the hospital still, he would come back really quickly like he hadn’t even been there at all. I know that he had a premature baby. Yes I do I don’t know the whole truth of it I never will Until years though, when I spoke to his ex and I still don’t know the whole truth and why the fuck should she have to tell me anyway but all night he painted her is a villain same as I did with my ex yes as a personality disorder, everyone else is a bad guy You never the bad guy until it all comes tumbling down and you hate yourself and you wanna cut yourself or burn yourself so I trigger on this post but I have to say this I have to be honest with myself I must’ve liked it the fact that my family my family was born into because I don’t have kids that’s another sad part of this story is, I can’t Maybe it’s sick but there you go. They treat this man as an outcast just as much as I treated me as an outcast. I feel he wasn’t allowed to my sisters birthday party even though my sister was married to a literal word rapist still in prison for it now, and all the other sick things he did And my ex or right through this, of course I’ve noticed can also see crazy people who are crazy can always see crazy and others. Neurotypical are very selfish people. The first time I met him. He didn’t use her when he told me about it. apparently he told me about it and anyway I told him not to choose me over his child. Anyway he did we were texting all the time I was texting him. He was writing me love i never had this in my entire life. He literally swept me off my feet and the good thing that happened at the beginning of our relationship was that I went away for a week two days after we met Which made me want him more and vice versa now he probably did stuff I’ve heard he might of he’s married now to this girl. He slagged off for years and shagged. The sister who is 17 when we were together together what we broke up we didn’t properly broke up, but we broke up This is where the comes in we’re living in accommodated living for people who are not very well addicts mentally ill and so on. Anyway, many of the nights I would sneak into his room through the window or he sneak into mine and would lie bad faith, even if there was cameras. Oh he hasn’t asked your random stuff like this and I’ll be like it has. I’ve gone to bed, and obviously it was the most exciting time of my life. I was 23 years 22 years old and absolutely in love. Yes I know they got married at the age of 17 but it wasn’t part. Of course it was in my res autistic and everything was always more dramatic. The next time I’m bigger and better also I thought crazy so we end up getting kicked out of this facility I live there for a year I hadn’t really stayed there. I’d stayed in my mum, still even though she di

So things got out of hand that I’ve got made homeless I’m looking back now I thought it was so unfair and at the time I thought it was unfair. People who got made homeless shouldn’t have got made home as really people who this is all they had and the man I’m with now With living in the shed house with my ex there is four of the houses two of them staffed two of them not! so my partner was in a house without staff and then got put into the room next to me in the staff house which I was in me and my partner and I said maybe it was a distraction from my ex and his past, I will never know the full extent of.

So heroin heroin you ask how did it come into it well slowly that’s what I’ll say slowly he came back one day in a really really bad mood. This is before we got kicked out and started smoking on the bed. I’ve never been a situation I’ve been around hard before and it made me very uncomfortable, especially because I hadn’t touched them so I felt embarrassed and obliged this time I didn’t. I felt safe I felt safe with him. I just did so here it goes we move out and by this point before I go with him I will say I was addicted to sleeping pills on and off and opiates pill, but only pills so I sort of being there, but I wasn’t in the world of dealers drug addicts, horrible people debt, losing friends, and emotionally and because of the addiction. No nothing was that bad yet was destined for this maybe probably who knows I don’t I don’t even know so I will never forget the day I did it because it made life, so like it made sense for the first time in my life. It just made sense everything fit into place. Everything was like this is what it’s meant to be and this is how I should feel it wasn’t overwhelming how I thought it was meant to be, and this is how it traps you guys so don’t do it, it just felt like I had found the key to a door that had been locked 22 years and I had found that key. Obviously not a drug use. very narcissistic you really don’t think it’s gonna be you you just don’t you don’t think it’s going to be you in 1 million years even when you told me all these things via my ex when he told me this is what it’s like. I’m depressed now I can’t feel without it sex drive it fuck it fuck the way you connect with people you lose that connection and when you’re autistic anyway that is hard to have by the beginning it makes that all possible it makes you have emotion it makes you connect it makes you feel like you are invincible, and I always thought the word heroine became from the hero within, it kind of makes sense, wouldn’t it.

So the first time I used it, I smoked it we were living in one of his friends house in the spare bedroom that was freezing cold and the guy was addicted to it. The wife wasn’t they had two children. They had three children but the two children were in the room next to the dad, who is addicted really bad day and ill And this was the first place I used it they thought I was just normal. They didn’t think I touched so when I asked to try it one time when I got kicked off Valium which as you know it’s not very good I’ve got put on after a bad experience. Grape grape by my ex, and it was a short term thing, but I felt awful and I was hallucinating and I was in a really weird way and I also still appealed from my other exes house which led me to be really drooling and off my head and not remembering things in this house anyway, so that’s where I first tried it and for that year when we were living from house to house of people and Sophie spare rooms whatever, was the most exciting time of my life. It was an adventure that I’ve never been in. It was some kind of life experience that I needed for that time, but it led to this really scary time that I live in now so would I take it back? I’m not too sure i’ll lose all these memories, but then I won’t be attached to it so much either. Yeah I’d probably take it because the people I know now I really don’t wanna know I’m telling you something, there’s a lot of really dodgy men in this world who will try and proposition you for sex for money or they will try and do things to you the amount of times I’ve had men do things to me that dodgy sexually, I can’t even fathom it’s very sad, no one should have to go through that. made me feel so protected from the heroin all of it the relationship with that felt amazing, We lived from moment to moment we bonded so deeply our moon 🌙 signs very compatible. we shared everything let’s say so in the five years 2 1/2 of them are good 2 1/2 of them really bad but let’s say this was really severe case of grooming two that felt good though it felt really good because it came with the drugs and it came with the reward system that your brain creates of Doberman, but after a while your break your brain needs a pleasure and reward centre to survive. It’s like breathing it felt amazing. I felt so good every time I felt so good he he controlled my habits so I didn’t get too bad so I would get high probably off. Let’s say £10 worthb or £20 worth a day, maybe less let’s say less.

Eventually, my family obviously found out because I’m a very honest person and I like why did you say that I’ve noticed addicts are very dishonest people, scum of the Earth and I can’t stand them and they can’t stand me either. They do not like me and I think my ex knew this about them that they wouldn’t like me because he did all the messaging and calls to these people I didn’t know these people were so uptight about a text message, but they are absolutely ridiculous, I wasn’t used to this level of paranoia unless it was in your mind none of these people give a shit about you. I’m talking as 33-year-old me now and not 22-year-old man. It’s been over 10 years can you believe it because I can I mean it could be another lifetime ago and it could be yesterday 22-year-old didn’t know about this. Didn’t know this rule it’s uptight don’t do that and I honestly I hate these people honestly I’m miserable it’s not good for me I’m constantly sad,😔 yeah I mean the end of last year I going to join this astrology course and I have a teacher now at this woman I listen to for years on YouTube who I love I love her way of teaching listening to her on YouTube she was so good at going into it all. I looked up with Darkside zodiac and I found her but anyway I’m gonna tell her I lost friends in my opinion, so basically when I was younger, I was a bit of a goody-goody so that transition into hard-core addict who thought she was Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain with her boyfriend was obviously a massive shock to my friends and family I’m guessing constantly asking for money this day,

They didn’t realise this world opened up, a whole box of things that made me feel better, but a whole shit load of a basement full of crap that came with it. They won’t so yeah, I was a goody goody I didn’t really drink. I didn’t do this I didn’t do that, but I was fun. I was a happy shy girl And I would join in and have a laugh with my friends we would get the stone high part when I used to bring school in into school my sister’s part into my friend and he smoked I didn’t even smoke. Then I didn’t even feel the pressure to smoke. So yeah this was a massive personality change I guess so I always went from group group I was always a bit of a drifter.! point of sticking a needle in my arm, I wasn’t bad in fact I was the opposite of a bad arse you could say but as he has went on things happened and you meet people, my best friend who I be my best friend from the age of 10 made her be my best friend until she agreed. She was my best friend from me from me, her being sick of me, trying to ask it probably so I made my first love through her years later 18 years old and he was just schizophrenic and I even got warned off him which was probably the right idea cause this is where my first mental break happened a few years after that so this is why is slowly threatened to do law, and my personality was really changing, and I guess it was very scary for the people around me, so I’d have relationships with people friends whatever, but it always felt forced with this man. It never felt forced. It felt natural, and he would convince me that these people wanted to hurt me, or they weren’t good enough for me or they for I wasn’t good enough for them. He was very clever very very very clever he had me believing all of this shit and so it still this day is in and I can’t get rid of and I think anyone who’s been in a abusive relationship will feel this.

I have put a lot of pressure on my family. I feel like I am loving girl but I don’t have a family like the rest of them all my sisters have children. My brother is happy in a relationship. He is with someone for 11 years and he was very very happy even though he’s my older brother he sometimes feels like my younger brother because he’s so more innocent and I was innocent like he was too Very similar. In fact he was more of a rebel than I was saying I think I wanted to rebel so badly because I never had the opportunity. I mean the first guy I slept with gave me herpes if you want to talk about bad luck, but I thought it was a bad ass then because I was going out of a guy from Bangladesh who was a Muslim who had a restaurant well he didn’t have the restaurant who I was fucking in his restaurant And I thought I was cool. I was getting free curries and then I went to the next shop up the road and it was a Turkish guy who had a gorgeous green eyes. I was obsessed with being in love and not with English man. I thought English men were trash they never fancied me in school. I never had boyfriends, and I lost my virginity at 16.

so my friends now anyway, who I lost I’ve tried to bring back into my life but they’re not perfect either. I’m not saying they’re perfect but they weren’t drug Alex and we weren’t into people like that. They don’t know anything about people like that when I tell them about the things that have been degraded too, I’m in the last three years I didn’t leave my house because of a sexual assault kind of thing again And it’s very very scary so they couldn’t understand it or comprehend. They didn’t know why I was agitated. They didn’t know why I couldn’t meet up with them till sad times. They didn’t know why I didn’t pick up my phone they didn’t know why I called them at weird hours they didn’t understand it they didn’t understand why I wanted money they didn’t understand why I didn’t have this. They didn’t understand the people that knew I get it. I wish I didn’t even guys They see it though they see what happened, but then I did have one very abusive friend who is a Gemini and she would send me essays with you sometimes and this was before I got with Matt! she could still be very nasty I mean when I got her, she was like really rude about that and telling people I mean what kind of friend does that anyway so she comes and stay with me after a few years of me being with him and we have a nice time. Kind of have a good time, I’m still happy because I’m with him well I think I am anyway she comes down with fake note she was like can you use it cause she knew the olive. It was a bit backwards compared London I was like yeah probably be fine anyway one day we walked into town and I call her from upstairs from my exes flat and she looks horrified on that. Oh God here we go and she looked up annoyed anyway she’s there and a few days later, she’s all happy happy all on her phone and a good mood God. I wish I felt like her with making weed and I was being very paranoid and that’s when I stopped because I’d started smoking crack at this point because my ex couldn’t do heroin any more fuck from injecting and I hated cocaine. I just did it because he did it and he wanted me to owe him money. A lot of these drug addicts Connell is too so you owe the money I offend this. Well I’m too good for it and I know I’m so good for it and I wanna meet the other people who are not like this who are not con artists ! so she is high and she’s like don’t you feel so amazing I didn’t but I pretended yeah for great anyway she doodled all over this night and then she goes he go you can have it as she left to go home. I was like cheers can’t use it for shit now but thanks 🧑‍🎨.

Chapter 1

35 notes · View notes

jmbringitonworld · 3 months ago

Text

A Good Father 2

AO3 link for people who prefer to read fics there

This is the follow-up to my fic A Good Father.

I know it's been forever since I posted the first chapter, but life has been... difficult since then. I've already talked about it before on my blog, but to sum it up, my father's cancer got worse. And worse. And worse. He finally passed away a year ago, right in front of my mother and I. So, as you might understand, I've not been feeling up to writing for a long time. I've especially been unable to write daddy-daughter fluff.

But this story has remained in my mind! I never forgot it or lost my desire to continue it. After a couple of nice comments, and some encouragement from a friend, I finally managed to claw together enough motivation to write the next chapter. So thank you!

I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, and I'm very sorry that it's taken me this long to get it out.

_________________________________________

The shrill cry of a baby pierced through the air and tore Asgore from his slumber. Blearily, the King of Monsters forced his eyes open. Impenetrable darkness greeted him. He groaned and closed his eyes once more.

With a deep yawn, he slipped out from beneath his soft, warm blankets. And promptly failed to catch his footing. He tumbled to the floor in a messy heap, accidentally snagging his covers as he went and dragging them down with him.

Frisk continued to cry.

It was with some difficulty, and no amount of grace, that Asgore disentangled himself from his sheets and stumbled to his feet. He gave his head a shake in an attempt to dispel his lingering drowsiness, and rubbed at his tired eyes.

With plodding steps, he made his way to the baby’s cot.

“There, there, my child,” he mumbled, suppressing another yawn and reaching into the cot. “Come here. I’ve got you, Frisk. Daddy’s here, don’t cry.”

With gentle hands, he picked up his daughter and cradled her to his chest, right by his Soul. Immediately, his Soul started pulsing with soothing magic, in an instinctive attempt to pacify his child. Frisk, being human and thus not naturally attuned to magic, did not respond as favourably as a monster child would have.

Nevertheless, she’d been surrounded by Asgore’s magic since birth and had therefore come to draw comfort from the familiar feeling of being enveloped by it. That, combined with her father’s safe and loving hold, calmed her down enough to reduce her loud wailing to upset sniffles and muted whining.

“Good girl.” Asgore leaned down to gently nuzzle Frisk’s head. The baby’s hair tickled his nose. He resisted the urge to sneeze. “Daddy will have your food ready in no time.”

With practised ease, Asgore managed to prepare a bottle of human baby formula with one hand, while the other continued to cradle Frisk to his Soul. He then carefully warmed the bottle up in his hand with controlled use of fire magic. When he was confident the milk was at the right temperature, he brought the bottle towards his hungry baby.

He paused. Doubt crept in.

Just to be absolutely sure, he let a few drops of milk fall onto the tip of his nose, the part of his body least covered by fur.

He sneezed.

Definitely the perfect temperature.

Satisfied, he once more brought the bottle to Frisk’s mouth. The baby eagerly latched onto the teat and started guzzling down milk, happy to finally be able to sate her hunger.

Asgore hummed, eyes soft and Soul fuzzy as he gazed at his child. It was a feeling he hadn’t felt in so long. He still hadn’t gotten used to it yet. He doubted he ever would.

After Frisk had filled her belly, Asgore carefully burped her (“golly, human babies are very strange”), then changed her nappy (“so very strange… and smelly”).

Sated, clean and warm, Frisk let out a contented yawn and drifted off to sleep.

Asgore held his baby for a moment longer, savouring her presence - the precious weight in his arms, the comforting warmth seeping into his fur, into his Soul - before gently, reluctantly, placing her on a bundle of plush blankets and pillows on the floor of his living room.

He lingered beside Frisk a bit longer, his eyes glued to the rise and fall of her tiny chest. A quick Check showed that her vibrant red Soul was as strong as ever.

With great effort, the King of Monsters tore his eyes away from his sleeping child, and made his way to his bedroom, to get ready for the day.

Once done, he peeked his head into the living room to check on Frisk - still alive, still happy and healthy and sleeping peacefully - and then trotted towards his front door. He opened the door and was greeted by the sight of an empty courtyard. Confused, he stepped outside and looked around.

Still no one.

Frowning, he retreated back into his house and closed the door.

“Hmmm.” He scratched his head, eyes going to the clock on the wall. “Did I get the time wrong?”

Just then, he heard a knock on the door.

Opening it, he was greeted by three very familiar skeleton monsters.

“FOOFFY!!” The smallest skeleton let out an excited squeal and wriggled in his father’s arms, reaching towards the large, furry goat monster with grabby hands.

W.D. Gaster gave an exasperated huff and tightened his grip on his squirming son. “CALM DOWN, PAPYRUS. KING ASGORE IS THE RULER OF MONSTERS, NOT A STUFFED TOY. BEHAVE YOURSELF.”

Asgore chuckled, reaching a hand to pat the toddler on his skull. “Now, now. I don’t mind. If it will make him happy, I will gladly act the part of a teddy goat! Hahaha!”

Papyrus grabbed the large hand petting him and wrapped his arms tightly around it in a big hug. “FOOFFY!! TEDDY!!” He looked down to the third skeleton monster in their group, who was quietly observing the events from the safety of their father’s tall legs and long coat. “SNAS! ‘OOK! FOOFFY TEDDY GOAT!!”

Sans grinned at his younger brother. “yup, sure is, baby bro. very fluffy.”

The Royal Scientist sighed. He shook his skull, before a smile crept onto his face. “GREETINGS, ASGORE. I APOLOGISE FOR OUR DELAY. LITTLE PAPYRUS MADE QUITE THE MESS WITH HIS OATMEAL THIS MORNING.”

Asgore chuckled and waved off his friend’s apologies. “Oh gee, it’s no bother, WingDings. I know how much of a handful kids can be! And your youngest is quite the spirited little fellow, as usual. Howdy!”

He wriggled the hand still trapped in the monster toddler’s hold, tickling Papyrus and causing him to let out a peal of laughter. The child flailed his arms with the force of his mirth, releasing his prisoner. Asgore wasted no time in retrieving his hand, using his newly-freed limb to gesture his guests into his home.

“Come in, come in, folks,” he stepped aside to let the skeleton family inside, “Frisk is in the living room. Would you like a cup of tea, WingDings?”

“OH!” The doctor blinked at the question. “YES, PLEASE, ASGORE.”

The monster king smiled at his friend and ushered them all into the living room, before departing to prepare a pot of Golden Flower tea.

Frisk was still fast asleep, as the skeleton trio approached her.

Papyrus stilled for a moment as he eyed the new and mysterious figure on the ground. It wasn’t long before his curiosity got the better of him, and he squirmed in his father’s hold, demanding to be put down.

Dr. Gaster cautiously did so, with a stern, “BE VERY, VERY CAREFUL PAPYRUS. DO NOT DISTURB THE BABY.”

Under his father’s watchful eye socket, Papyrus toddled towards the dozing baby and squatted down beside her.

He tilted his skull to one side, then the other, frowning down at the human as if trying to figure her out.

With surprising gentleness, he reached out a finger and lightly poked Frisk’s cheek. His eye sockets widened at the plush give of the baby’s cheek.

“SKISHY!” he squealed, awe filling his expression. He grinned widely and looked towards his father and older brother. “IT SKISHY!”

WingDings smiled at his youngest son, fondness lighting up his eye sockets. He approached the pair with quiet steps, and knelt down beside them. His hand hovered in the air, prepared to intervene in case Papyrus got too rough in his excitement.

“I KNOW. HUMANS ARE INDEED SQUISHY. ESPECIALLY COMPARED TO SKELETONS.”

He reached down towards the baby. He hesitated for a second, then stroked a finger down the human’s other cheek. Frisk shifted a bit at the sensation, then settled down again. Her mouth stretched into a gummy smile, before smoothing back out as she went back to snoring softly.

The eldest Gaster’s face softened, the edges of his mouth curving into a smile. He looked at his youngest son, then his oldest. “THIS IS KING ASGORE’S NEW DAUGHTER. I TOLD YOU TWO ABOUT HER. HER NAME IS FRISK.”

Papyrus blinked at his father, taking in this new information. He looked back down at this ‘Frisk’ creature, brows furrowing in consideration. After a moment, he seemed to have come to a conclusion about her.

“HE-’O FISH,” he addressed the human and gave her a wave with his gloved hand. “WANNA BE FENDS?!”

Frisk yawned, limbs twitching in her sleep.

Papyrus took this as a sign of agreement.

“NYEH HEH HEH!!” He laughed excitedly, eye sockets lighting up with delight. He then called to his brother. “‘OOK SNAS!” He gestured to the human, “I MADE A FEND!”

Sans gave him an uncertain grin in return.

Unlike his father and brother, the elder of the Gaster children hung back, casting a wary eye socket on the snoozing human.

He’d heard a lot about humans, and knew that they could be dangerous. Very dangerous, as the last fallen human had proven. This one might have been even smaller than his little brother, but who knew what she might be capable of if given the chance. Who knew what kind of monster she might grow up to be.

For his family, for his precious baby bro, he would remain vigilant.

Just then, he felt a large, furry hand press against his back.

He looked up and was met by Asgore’s kind, inviting smile.

“Go ahead, young one.” The large goat monster gestured towards the human. “Why don’t you go say hello to my child.”

Unable or unwilling to refuse the king’s request, Sans gave him a shaky nod of his skull. “uh, okay. sure, mister dreemurr.”

His eyelights flitted to his father, who gave him a reassuring look and an approving nod. Drawing courage from his father’s confidence, Sans hesitantly joined his brother’s side and crouched down next to the human.

WingDings backed away to give his sons space, and retreated to stand beside Asgore. The two fathers look on with bated breath.

Papyrus giggled and waved excitedly to his older brother. “SNAS, ‘OOK AT MY NEW FEND!”

Sans did. He traced his eyelights along the soft contours of the human’s round face, mapping all of her many unusual human features. With a sharp focus belying his young years, he carefully examined and catalogued each and every detail he noticed.

Papyrus grabbed his hand and yanked it towards the human. “SNAS! SEE HOW SKISHY FISH IS!” He poked the human’s cheek in demonstration and laughed as his phalanges sank into the flesh. “SKISHY FISH!”

Sans gave the human a dubious look, but relented in the face of his brother’s insistence.

The young skeleton monster brought a single bony finger down to the human’s face, and under the two adults’ watchful gazes, very, very carefully gave the human’s cheek a poke.

His brother was right. The human was indeed very squishy.

Sans blinked.

He poked the cheek again. The human was also soft.

Another poke. And warm.

Frisk was evidently not as enthused by all the prodding as the skeleton monsters were. Her tiny mouth turned down at the corners and her brows creased. After some fidgeting to dislodge the offending fingers, her eyelids fluttered open. Her eyes roved around for a bit, before settling on the larger of the two nearby figures.

Sans froze.

The human’s eyes were bright and clear and full of innocence. Just like his Just like his brother’s. Just like any monster child’s.

Sans couldn’t move a bone - his whole being held captive by the force of the baby’s gaze.

The human’s hand flailed in the air before catching on the finger Sans still held close to her face. Those tiny, fleshy digits curled around Sans’s own larger, bony one.

The human gave the finger she held a firm tug. Sans felt a faint, answering tug in his Soul.

“heh. human. don’t you know how to greet a new pal?” Sans gave the human a toothy grin. “here, lemme show ya.”

Slowly, delicately, Sans closed the rest of his fingers around the human’s small hand.

“i’m sans. sans the skeleton. nice to meet ya, frisk.”

Frisk smiled at him and let out a giggle.

Sans smiled back. He could feel his eyelights fuzzing around the edges.

Papyrus cheered, eye sockets sparkling, and clapped his hands. “YAY!! NEW FEND!! NEW FEND!!”

The eldest Gaster sighed in relief, glad at the lack of any incidents, and delighted that his and Asgore’s children were getting along. This was more than he’d dared to hope for.

Next to him, Asgore looked to be on the verge of cheering and clapping himself. He grasped his friend’s arm excitedly, wide, shining eyes fixed on the three children.

��Look Wingsy! Look at that! Our kids are getting along! Golly, ain’t that just swell?” He turned those twinkling eyes towards WingDings. “They’re going to be the best of friends, I just know it!”

The Royal Scientist gave a start. “WINGSY…?” he muttered under his breath, colour spreading across his cheekbones, before speaking louder, “AHEM, CERTAINLY! GREAT FRIENDS, I AM SURE!”

Asgore gave WingDings’s arm a squeeze. “Yes. Just like us.”

The skeleton monster’s eyelights grew bigger and brighter in the face of Asgore’s happy smile, directed right at him. “YES. FRIENDS LIKE US.”

After a moment, Asgore let go of the monster doctor’s arm and walked towards the children. Gaster senior followed him a few beats later.

Kneeling beside Sans, Asgore clasped the young monster’s shoulder in his big, furry paw.

“Sans. Thank you for wanting to be friends with my daughter. It means a lot to me. And I’m sure it’ll mean even more to Frisk.”

Sans ducked his head shyly, a light blush staining his cheekbones.

“‘s nothin’,” he mumbled, unable to meet the king’s grateful eyes. His eyelights drifted towards Frisk, one hand still held in his own, and towards his little brother, who was gleefully telling his new friend about all of his interests and hobbies, and effusing about all the fun they were going to have together.

Asgore shook his head.

“It most certainly is not ‘nothing’, young one,” he insisted. His gaze went to his child. “Frisk is human. And as I’m sure you know, humans… Well, monsters are not all that fond of them.”

He sighed, worry filling his expression. Sans looked uncomfortable at the turn the conversation was taking.

“I’m not sure how many monsters will be willing to make friends with her, no matter how kind she is. I’m not sure how many will even give her a chance.”

A shadow passed over the old king’s face.

“There are many reasons a human is not safe in the Underground. There are many hardships any child, let alone a human one, will have to face growing up. And I cannot be there to protect her all the time. I… I cannot help but worry for my daughter.”

Sans stilled as the Monster King’s solemn gaze fell on him.

“Which is why I hope you will try to be a good friend to Frisk. To be someone she can trust, and rely on.”

There was a weight to the old monster’s words that Sans didn’t like.

“Would you please look out for my child? Watch over her, and protect her?”

Sans definitely didn’t like where this was going.

“Could you please, please promise me, Sans?”

Sans wanted to run away and hide from the old man’s pleading look and begging words. He didn’t want that kind of responsibility - he was only a kid, after all, just five years old. He already had his baby brother to look after and protect; he didn’t want to be responsible for another life. He didn’t want to care that much for another person.

But… Sans recognised the emotion in Asgore’s voice. He knew that kind of grief. He understood that worry, that fear. He’d lost his mother not long after his brother was born - he knew, intimately, that fierce desire to protect those who remained.

And so, with a strength Sans didn’t feel like he possessed, the skeleton monster looked at Asgore, and gave him a firm, resolute nod of his skull.

“okay. i will.” He gripped the hand in his just a little bit harder. “i promise.”

Sans imagined that the sun dawning over the horizon that he’d read about in books, could not hope to match the brilliance of the joy breaking out across Asgore’s face at that moment.

“Thank you, Sans. Thank you so much. I cannot tell you how much this means to me.” Asgore’s voice held so much sincerity and gratitude, that it caused Sans to duck his head once more, overcome by shyness.

Papyrus pouted, his cheekbones puffing out in indignation.

“ME TOO! I POMISE TOO!” He yelled, stamping his foot on the ground for emphasis. “I TOO POMISE TO BE FISH FEND! AND POTEC HER!”

If possible, Asgore’s smile widened. He laughed, loud and unrestrained, from deep in his belly.

“Oh ho! Is that so, young one? Golly, ain’t my Frisk a lucky girl!” The old goat monster gave the toddler a pat on the skull. “Well then, Papyrus, you also have my thanks. I could not be happier that my daughter has a monster as great as you as her friend.”

Papyrus preened under the king’s praise. “NYEH HEH HEH! I AM GEAT! I AM THE GEAT PA-PY-WUS!”

Dr. Gaster knelt down beside the group, placing one hand each on his sons’ shoulders. “DO NOT FORGET ME. I HAVE ALSO PROMISED TO DO ALL IN MY POWER TO LOOK OUT FOR AND PROTECT YOUNG FRISK.” He looked directly into Asgore’s eyes, conveying the sincerity of his words with his gaze. “AND I DO NOT INTEND ON EVER BREAKING MY PROMISE.”

Asgore’s smile softened, his eyes crinkling at the edges. “I could never forget you, my friend. Ever since we met, you have always been with me. Even in the darkest of times.”

WingDings had no words to offer in response, so he settled for giving Asgore his own warm smile. His eyelights glinted in their sockets - two little lights shining in the dark.

Sans eyed the two grown-ups, before turning his skull away, resisting the urge to make a face. Instead, he grinned at his baby bro, who stood proudly with his hands on his hips. He chuckled at the adorable display, love for his brother filling his Soul, before turning towards Frisk.

“welp, there ya have it, buddy.” He winked at the baby, who blinked up at him in reply. “we’ve only just met, and already you have me an’ pap as your friends. even dad’s lookin’ out for ya. and your dad thinks the world of you, of course. we’re all rootin’ for ya, frisky.”

He booped Frisk on the nose, then laughed at the way her face scrunched up, her nose wrinkling and her eyes going slightly cross-eyed, as she tried to make sense of what had just happened to her.

“heh. so young and you’re already so loved.” His expression softened, his eyelights going big and fuzzy. “you better grow up strong and kind, ‘kay? and make sure you take care of yourself, frisk. ‘cause we all really care about you.”

Frisk looked at him quietly.

And then she opened her mouth wide and stretched out all of her limbs in a full body yawn. Without missing a beat, she promptly fell fast asleep, her breath coming out in soft snores.

Sans snickered. He gave her hand one last gentle squeeze, before letting it go.

Asgore gazed down at his infant daughter. His Soul shone at seeing how peacefully she slept, without a care in the world. Trouble might come for her one day, but for now, she was safe, surrounded by friendship and love.

__________________________________________

Again, I apologise for my long hiatus. I'm not sure when I'll have the next chapter ready, since life's unpredictable and I have other obligations, but it definitely won't be as long as the wait for this one was. I at least have the next few chapters planned out in my mind, so it's a matter of being able to sit down and write them out properly.

Anyway, thank you for reading and I hope you liked it! Take care and see you next time o(*^▽^*)┛

Next Chapter >>

#JMB writes #undertale fanfiction #pre-canon au #asgore #asgore dreemurr #frisk #baby frisk #w.d. gaster #sans #papyrus #asgore adopts frisk #goat dad fan club!!#frisk and the skelebros are childhood friends #sans ain't getting out of making promises #future frans #future kingdings #romance is not going to be the focus though #i'm here for that family fluff!

2 notes · View notes

3s0t3ric · 2 years ago

Text

Excuse All The Asides. We’re in an Adderall Shortage.

Recently I have been diving into the habits I have. One of them being the fact that I indeed, am a post-it note girly. When it’s time for me to organize my ideas the first thing I do is sift through the compilation of time colorful papers that seem to remind me how to live my life. A note from me, to me. If only I always took my own advice.

I’ve been doing this as long as I can remember. I’ll get a thought to add something to my grocery list, and I am certain if I don’t attempt to jot it down, it’ll be gone sooner than it came. I’ve learned my lesson a time or two, so I’ve gotten into the habit of writing things down.

As a person with ADHD/ former student/ person who occupies planet earth I have been influenced by the bullet journal trend. The idea of having a guide to EVERYTHING about my life, my last dentist appointment, when I changed my sheets, my loved ones birthdays and my to do lists all in one place is INVIGORATING!!!!

Once.

Well once it’s complete. It’s just, getting it done that I struggle with. Truthfully, the last thing I wanna do after I’ve wrestled on a fitted sheet (how does it ALWAYS seem to pop off the corner farthest from me???) is document in my 3rd grader handwriting the date of today in a page it probably took me forever to find. I’ll take the pillow breaking me out, thank you.

I was surprised to find these devices for jogging the memory of it’s writers had a name. We really reinvented the wheel during the pandemic with bullet journals (I’ve been forgetful for years but I’ll give it to the bullet journal guys) the original conceptual bubble we are discussing is called a commonplace book. The idea being that all of your thoughts are in a Common. Place. (Really complex I know.)

I instantly jogged over to the wiki page. The article I found this in was discussing Thomas Jefferson’s commonplace book, however the idea of common place books dates back to John Locke, and later Charles Darwin. What this tells me is people have been drawing graphic organizers and forgetting birthdays for centuries. Congrats, it’s generational.

I next thought about all the quotes we’ve received from these important people from history. Were they the initial person having these ideas, or were they just wise enough to write them down?

You see I don’t know about you, but I don’t know annnyyyone that can personally vouch for Locke’s “life, liberty and property” thing or Darwin’s “natural selection” thing with their own two eyes. For all we know it could have been notes taken from a conversation ages ago that’s gone untitled in Charles Darwin’s big ole book of ideas.

Applying this to my current habits, how much have I let breeze out of my consciousness to inspire others without writing it down myself. How often have I proposed an idea, just for someone else to get the credit just because they conveniently decided to have their posit notes handy.

Ever since I’ve had this idea (5 days ago) I’ve kept my pen clicked and my post-its clear. The tumble weeds of post-it notes, pictures, and post cards from the people I love surrounds my intellect with the company it needs to produce greatness. My affirmations around me give context to my abilities and my to do list gives context to how I am going to do it. I am nothing if not capable and I SWEAR I will never miss another doctors appointment because those late fees are beyyyonddddd me.

You know who go with the flow? Dead fish. Write it down.

1 note · View note

justmegeorgie · 2 years ago

Text

I know for a fact I am going to regret posting this later, but hey, no one’s going to read this anyways.

Ever since I moved to where I am now, when I was only 7, turning 8, a lot has happened. Then again, it’s life, a lot happens in a tiny span, and sometimes you can’t do anything about it because it just happens.

It’s been really tough, to be honest.

I’ve lost my childhood best friend, who I love with every piece of soul and heart, I have lost my grandad to cancer, my other grandmother to dementia and Alzheimer’s, and I have just lost every single friend I ever had. It’s so tough.

Tonight, I cried so hard, for the first time in months, and I never knew I had it in me to do it that violently, in a way. It all just tumbled out, all my feelings, my thoughts, the pieces of my heart, the useless threading of my soul, and it was all lost through tears.

A tonne of measly little tears, and violent sobs.

Everyone has blown up on me, calling me every name under the sun, and for what?

A girl who wanted to sit back and see someone break because she wanted to see them suffer.

A singular lie had all my friends turn on me, hate me, verbally abuse me. She isolated me.

Well, I isolated me.

I’ve had to move schools because it became so bad for my mental health that I couldn’t cope, and the teachers would do nothing about it. Absolutely nothing. They watched me break down, tears, sobs, mumbled words and a jumbled mind trying to spew out everything it was feeling. And they did nothing. When I confessed to them about a guy two years above me in school who sexually assaulted me, they did nothing. They did nothing.

On the other hand, I met this guy.

My goodness, I think I fell in love at first message.

He messaged me on Wizz, saying he might as well shoot his shot, and I told him to. He’s so pretty. A few pick up lines later, he added me on snapchat, and the past night or so, we’ve been going back and forth with snaps. His voice is beautiful, so is his laugh. I love the way he speaks. He calls me his love.

I want to his love.

But I don’t know if he wants me to be.

I guess that’s a pro in spite of all the cons, right?

I damn hope so.

Because I’ve never had to cover my mouth and let out a squeal so powerful it could put the Leaning Tower of Pisa back into its original stance, to stand tall and proud. I’ve never had to gossip to my cousin about him so much that just the thought of him has be folding into myself. I’ve never had to take a few seconds before I could send a snapchat back because just seeing him not care if I spammed the chat, or when he calls me “my love”.

He makes me happy, but I don’t want to get hurt.

I’ve been through so much.

I don’t want to get hurt, but I’m in that much emotional and physical pain that I want to give it a chance because I think this may be the last chance for anyone.

Turns out, he lives two hours away from me. I’m not happy about the distance, but at least he doesn’t live in another country, or on the other side of England, right? I’m happy, as long as he is happy.

And I hope to whatever God is out there and listening to my jumbled thoughts, that he is happy.

Even if I don’t make him happy.

0 notes

dashboarddiaries · 2 years ago

Text

Dashboard Diaries is a production of Atypical Artists, hosted by Lauren Shippen and Cherokee McAnelly. Our theme was composed by Lauren Shippen and mixed by Brandon Grugle. Art by Shae McMullin. Transcription by Laudable.

For bonus clips, ad-free episodes, and more, become a patron at patreon.com/dashboarddiaries

Transcript under the cut!

[intro music]

Cherokee: Hello, bunker mates! I’m Cherokee McAnelly, Head of Entertainment at Tumblr, who still hasn’t made it through The Last of Us game prologue. It’s been about a 100 deaths and counting. (laughs)

Lauren: Oof. That’s rough! And I’m Lauren Shippen, Professional Writer, who HAS made it all the way through The Last of Us game several times, but who would die instantly in a real life apocalypse situation.

Cherokee: Same. And this is Dashboard Diaries, a podcast for you – the folks who are in this internet bunker with us. We talk about what’s going on in our favorite hell site, get into what we like to call “tumbl-lore,” do fandom deep dives, and share the times when we’ve gone feral over a new ship.

So, Lauren, what has your last week on Tumblr been like?

Lauren: I feel like it’s been peak Tumblr the past couple of weeks, because we’ve had the new Shadow & Bone season, we’ve had The Last of Us finale, we have the Mandalorian – so just wall to wall Pedro Pascal.

Cherokee: Tumblr Daddy.

Lauren: Tumblr Daddy. And of course the Ides of March, one of Tumblr’s central holidays.

Cherokee: Of course.

Lauren: Tumblr did a lot of special stuff for Ides of March this year. Do you want to walk us through what Tumblr Official actually did? Because I don’t even know that I know of all of it.

Cherokee: Yes. So, first off, we did our Ides of March promotion and takeover on the 19th. Why? I don’t know, because we did. (laughs)

Lauren: Holidays have no rules.

Cherokee: Exactly. Especially on Tumblr. It’s what day we say it is. You know? We made a water bottle in our swag store that says we should totally just stab Caesar. So, that was kind of our main thing that we did. And then I think we did some stuff on staff. I will be honest, I am totally in the weeds on Shadow & Bone for the past week and literally have not looked at a single email other than ... we did a Shadow & Bone answer time. So, there’s got to be more and I feel so embarrassed to say this – that I don’t know that staff did. That’s my bad. Sorry, guys. (laughs)

Lauren: No, I mean, I just love that Tumblr participated in the holiday this year. And yeah, I’ve been seeing so ... more so than any other year I feel like my dash has been filled with Ides of March posts for the past two weeks. Like there was a lead up to it.

Cherokee: 100%. What was your favorite Ides of March post? Because I have a bunch favorited.

Lauren: I re-blogged a couple of great Ides of March memes on DashboardDiaries.Tumblr.com and we will certainly re-blog more because Cherokee I want to know what those favorites are. But one of the ones I re-blogged, which I loved – just because also it’s in the spirit of Tumblr’s wonderful tradition of making movie posters for movies that don’t exist – is a movie poster for Knives In with the font of Knives Out. And it’s just this great mystery movie poster, but starring Gaius Julius Caesar and Quintus Ligarius Brutus.

And then the other post that I re-blogged that I was like, “Oh my goodness, is this really the beginning of the Ides of March obsession on Tumblr?” ... is a post from I believe nine or ten years ago of a knife stabbed into a classic Caesar dressing Kraft bottle. And someone commenting, being like, “Why is this such a popular post? Someone tell me what this is about.” And then someone replying with, “No one tell him.” And then a recent re-blog says, “This is it, lads. The post that started us on this path nine years ago. I sure hope no one told him.” Someone clearly not getting the joke of stabbing Caesar.

And I never really thought about where the origin of the Ides of March obsession on Tumblr began. And so it’s interesting that this might be the sort of Rosetta Stone of this particular meme.

Cherokee: Oh my god, the Rosetta Ranch.

Lauren: (laughs)

Cherokee: Well, I guess it’s Caesar dressing, so ... that doesn’t even.

Lauren: It still works, though.

Cherokee: We’ll allow it.

Lauren: What about you? What are some of your favorite Ides of March posts that you favorited?

Cherokee: So, there was one from this year that I will re-blog to the Dashboard Diaries Tumblr that says, Tumblr recommendations: “Call in. It’s time to celebrate the Ides of March.” Me: “Wasn’t the Ides of March four days ago?” Tumblr Recommendations: “Well, now it’s time to celebrate it.”

(laughter)

I love that. And then-

Lauren: Some good natured ribbing.

Cherokee: Exactly. You know what? We’re in on the joke, right? We didn’t forget. We obviously didn’t. (laughs) It’s actually my bad. I had a takeover reserved on that day for a Q&A that was supposed to be promoted and then it got shifted at the last minute. So, um, sorry!?

(laughter)

Lauren: Cherokee!

Cherokee: Sorry, guys! I’ll make it up to you. Please don’t stab me. So, my other favorite post was from Julius-Caesar and it says, “Hanging with my boys in the senate on Wednesday the 15th. Can’t wait to see what they’ve got planned. I hope it’s a surprise party.”

(laughter)

Yeah, another classic. I love a good Tumblr holiday. You know what?

Lauren: Me too.

Cherokee: No other website does just completely random holidays than Tumblr.

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: We love the 5th of November for multiple reasons, not just the obvious.

Lauren: For multiple reasons. Yeah. Speaking of November 5th, one of Tumblr’s biggest holidays, Cherokee, do you have a Supernatural update for us this week?

Cherokee: Do I ever, Lauren!?

[guitar riff]

It was a big episode on Supernatural this week. As it always is, but this one especially. We’ve had some revelation, some key moments.

Lauren: Ooh!

Cherokee: Not only just in the episode, but also in the watching of the episode. My notes are a roller coaster.

Lauren: Oh boy! I’m so excited.

Cherokee: So, this is S1:E14: Nightmare. Essentially it opens on Sam having a dream about someone killing his parents and he actually ... they actually go to where he thinks he saw the dream and it’s just happened. So, he’s having these premonitions. And so I immediately wrote, “Is this the Exorcist‼‼‼‼‼” Because the kid who killed his parents or killed his father, excuse me, not his parents, has ... I wrote, “He has powers like an evil Matilda.” (laughs) So, he’s been over here-

Lauren: That’s so accurate!

Cherokee: ... carrying knives around in the air, as one does. Matilda does chocolates. And this guy does knives. And you know what, to each their own. Speaking of the Ides of March, you know? (laughs)

Lauren: Yeah. Very true.

Cherokee: So, anyway, this kid has powers and it turns how that, I also wrote here, “Both Sam and this kid had mother ceiling deaths,” as I so eloquently wrote it.

(laughter)

Lauren: The classic mother on the ceiling death.

Cherokee: Hate to see it. Aw, man, not again.

Lauren: Hate to see it.

Cherokee: So, they obviously have these really parallel lives and then Sam says that apparently he started feeling like he’s been developing powers over the past six months and so he thinks he and this boy are linked. And sadly this kid doesn’t make it through the end of the episode.

Lauren: Oof.

Cherokee: But I hope Sam really goes on to figure out his own powers and I hope no one else dies on the ceiling. Don’t tell me if they do, Lauren.

(laughter)

Lauren: I honestly can’t remember. (laughs)

Cherokee: I’ll start a tally.

Lauren: Yeah. Dean deaths, Sam deaths, Ceiling deaths.

Cherokee: I think we’re on three, so far.

Lauren: Excellent.

Cherokee: We have mom #1 ceiling death, girlfriend ceiling death, mom #2 ceiling death.

Lauren: TRUE.

Cherokee: I think-

Lauren: Yep.

Cherokee: ... we may have one other in there so far, but I could be wrong.

Lauren: Listeners, please tell us.

Cherokee: Please, give us the final tally for season one and also, if you’re watching through, the full on – all 15 ceiling deaths.

Lauren: Yeah, we’d love to know those stats.

Cherokee: 15 seasons of ceiling deaths. You know? Okay. So, another great episode. Can’t wait on ... I kind of wish that this episode had been episode 15 to really go just in theme with all of the topics we’re talking about. But ...

Lauren: That’s true, yeah.

Cherokee: With that, as we go through the archives of Supernatural, why don’t we head on over to the archives of our Tumblr?

[guitar]

What do you have for us this week, Lauren?

Lauren: Please. Yes. Okay. So, this is a post from three years ago from somewhere around March 21st, the day that we’re recording. And it is just titled “Fleagle” and it’s got a picture ... the original post is from DirtShrines of a little frog plushie that seems to just have two hind legs and no front legs and enormous eyes. It’s got a tag coming off of it that says “Fleagle.” And then DirtShrines re-blogged it with “Fruff,” which is another frog plushie. This time it does have hands and two little feet and a tag from it saying, “Fruff.”

If course someone made fan art of Fleagle and Fruff and said they are in love. So, Fleagle and Fruff, they’re in love. This is just one of my favorite genres of Tumblr posts, which is that someone posts what is essentially nonsense, right? Like, these two nonsense words with pictures of plush frogs and then someone else on Tumblr is like, “You know what? I’m going to make beautiful original art about this.” I just ... it’s so wonderful.

Cherokee: I love it so much. This is hilarious. Also, I would watch a full length feature film about Fleagle and Fruff. So ... if anyone is listening ...

Lauren: Absolutely, Fleagle and Fruff, new Tumblr mascots, our blorbo of the week.

Cherokee: Oh, yes! You are so right!

[cheering]

Maybe that will be our next app store icon.

Lauren: Yes!

(laughter)

What about you, Cherokee? What do you have from the archives?

Cherokee: So, I have something relevant to a couple of things. I would say, first, kind of vaguely Ides of March-y, but also because Scream 6 just came out and I think it kind of-

Lauren: Oh, that’s right!

Cherokee: ... ties into that, too. So, I re-blogged this from Gracey Books in March 2016 ish, like around this week. And it says, “Murderer via text: I’m going to kill you. Me a week later: Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I saw this when I was in the middle of doing something else and then just completely forget about it.”

Lauren: Real!

Cherokee: I love this. It is so relatable. I have a three to five business day text response rate. At best.

Lauren: Oh yeah.

Cherokee: So, just yeah. Overall, really connect with that one.

Lauren: Very relatable, and yeah, truly topical. I love it.

Cherokee: It is the moment. Speaking of murder, we are going to get into the topic of this episode: The Last of Us after a quick ad break.

[synth]

Lauren: This week’s Tumblr vibe is making jokes with your friends about something that happened over 2,000 years ago. Because that’s what friendship is.

[synth]

Cherokee: All right. So, The Last of Us ... as most of you, many of you know, the season finale happened. It will be two weeks ago? The season finale of The Last of Us happened. We all have emotions about it. We all have a lot to talk about. We will never be the same. I don’t know if I’m talking for everyone, but I hope I am.

Lauren: I think you are. Yeah.

Cherokee: So, to start off, I believe you have a little Last of Us themed game, Lauren?

Lauren: I do. Well, because you have been watching The Last of US TV adaptation on HBO and correct me if I’m wrong, but you loved it so much that you purchased a PS4 and are now playing the game?

Cherokee: I did. Yes. About two episodes in-

Lauren: Incredible.

Cherokee: ... I thought, “I’m impatient. I’m going to overnight a PS4 to myself so that I can immediately play through and finish this game before the season ends to know what happens.” The hubris. The hubris!

(laughter)

Lauren: But the confidence. I respect the confidence.

So, I have a little quiz for you, which is pretty much the only weapons we’ve seen in the show are guns, basically, and Ellie’s knife. Right? But there is a whole myriad of weapons that are not in the show that appear in the game. So, of these following weapons, which is NOT a weapon that appears in the game?

Hatchet, Molotov cocktail, baseball bat with nails through it, pipe with a knife taped to it, flamethrower.

Only one of these doesn’t actually appear in the game and I want you to guess which one.

Cherokee: Okay. So, it doesn’t appear in the game but it may have appeared in the show, or am I just over thinking about the show?

Lauren: No, none of these have appeared in the show.

Cherokee: Got it. I was like, I swear I saw a baseball bat with nails through it in the scene at the campus with the monkeys and everything, when they got attacked by the cannibals. Just spoiling everything here for anyone listening – apologies.

Lauren: Oh yeah, I mean, this is going to be a spoiler heavy episode, for sure. But no, we really only see Joel handle guns in the show, but he has a much wider arsenal of weapons in the game that you have yet to get to. And so one of these is not an option in the game, and I want you to guess which one it is.

Cherokee: Okay. I am going to hatchet.

Lauren: No.

[buzzer]

So, the one that actually does not appear in the game is a baseball bat with nails through it.

Cherokee: Really? So, the one that I immediately guessed that definitely appears in everything. Got it – yes. (laughs)

Lauren: So, there is a baseball bat and you can modify it, but there is ... I stole that from Stranger Things, right? That’s Steve Harrington’s weapon in Stranger Things, basically.

Cherokee: Oh yes, it is.

Lauren: But the reason that I wanted to bring this up is because A) I love that you can fight zombies with a pipe that you tape a knife to, in the game. That’s literally a modification you can make to a pipe. And also I kept waiting for Joel to get a flamethrower in the show. And he never got a flamethrower. It is one of my favorite weapons in the game. And we never got it. So, I am keeping my fingers crossed for season two. But you have a lot of fun game play ahead of you, Cherokee.

And now that you know where the story is going, how are you feeling? How are you feeling about the show? How are you feeling about the game? Where are you at?

Cherokee: First of all, I ruined season two, and game, too, for myself weeks ago because I have no patience.

Lauren: No!

Cherokee: Yeah. And I didn’t even mean to. But I am not giving up in my pursuit to finish this game, but it is ... I’m on easy mode, obviously. Obviously.

Lauren: Yeah, of course.

Cherokee: It is so challenging. I just really ...

Lauren: It’s hard.

Cherokee: And also, I’m excited to play through this and I feel like to play through it and re-watch The Last of Us, I already kind of want to re-watch The Last of Us now that I know what happens – to see what I missed. But I’m like, no, I feel like I should play through the game and then in five to seven years when I’ve completed the game (laughs), go back and re-watch. But yeah, look, I’m an impulse buyer but I intend to make it through to the end. And maybe we can do a follow-up episode once I’ve played all the way through the game.

Lauren: Yeah!

Cherokee: Hopefully that will light a fire. (laughs) And I’ve been watching game play of that scene, it’s not hard to get through what I’m trying to get by, I just have to run. I just have to run.

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: So, you know, I believe I can do it. I can do it.

Lauren: You can do it. I believe in you. You’ve got this.

Cherokee: Multiple people who I have told have been like, “I will come over to your house. I will play you through the prologue,” and I’m like, I’m not a cheater.

Lauren: No, yeah. You gotta do it.

Cherokee: I’ve got to do this. Yeah, exactly.

Lauren: It will only get harder.

Cherokee: If I can’t make it through this, like what am I going to do with the pipe with a knife on it? You know? (laughs)

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: So, what did you think of the final episode compared to how the game ends? And also what did you think overall of the final episode?

Lauren: I mean, I loved the whole series overall and I thought, it’s funny, when we got to the end of episode eight, the penultimate episode, I was like – okay, so, we’re doing the whole last act in the last episode. Because it would be so weird to split those up. And then when that Sunday came around and I went to The Last of Us HBO Max page and saw that the episode was 43 minutes I was like, wait, are we not finishing game one? How are they going to pack this in?

And I have to say, I was really pleasantly surprised and really impressed by how much story they fit into one of the shortest episodes of the season. And that’s in part because they did take out a particularly long action sequence that happens in the game that I won’t say too much about because I think it is going to be fun for you to play. But I thought it was great. And I thought that it delivered the thing that the game delivers to you really effectively, which is sort of making you emotionally complicit in Joel’s violence.

And also because of some very slight but important differences in the way that Pedro Pascal approached Joel versus the way that Troy Baker approaches Joel in the game, that particular sequence in the hospital and then the conversations he has with Ellie after the fact felt different in an interesting way. And I’m really curious to see what season two is because I don’t think this is a spoiler, really, for game two. But game two picks up four years after game one. And I would be surprised if they just leapt to that directly. So, I’m really curious to sort of see how they fill that time and what they do structurally.

And I’m also kind of intrigued to see how Pedro Pascal’s particular coldness in that hospital sequence affects the story moving forward. But as somebody who didn’t know that was coming ... what was your reaction to Joel slaughtering everybody!?

Cherokee: Um ... I mean, when he was leaving the hospital with those two people following him out at gun point I was like, “There’s no way that he’s just going to frolic on out of here.”

Lauren: Leave ... (laughs)

Cherokee: Absolutely not. And so the moment he started attacking them I was like, I actually think I said “yes” out loud. And then I think I was like ... and I expected it to kind of like maybe him to fight them off and then kind of go get her and ... I didn’t expect him to kill every single living being in the building. And I don’t know if there’s a conflicting opinion about his actions here based on kind of the possibility of Ellie being the cure, but it seemed to me that I was like, you guys are just going to immediately go in and kill her and you don’t have a lot of technology here? I don’t feel like you’re set up to make a vaccine. So ... I feel like ... I was kind of like all for it. I don’t know if people thought/felt differently about that, because that was their whole journey. But I was like, you know what, I respect his decision there. Obviously, in game play world, not in real life world. But ...

Lauren: Yeah, I mean, of course. We are in a [crosstalk 00:20:31].

Cherokee: In the post apocalyptic scenario in question ... (laughs)

Lauren: I mean, I think that’s been one of the really interesting things about watching Tumblr react to this finale, has been seeing the varying opinions and sort of the discourse around Joel’s actions. Especially since I first played The Last of Us in 2020 of all times.

Cherokee: Great timing. Great timing. (laughs)

Lauren: Yeah, great timing. So, I played it seven years after the game had come out and so I sort of missed all the original discourse around the game. By the time I approached the game it was already considered one of the greatest games ever made. Which it is. And what’s interesting is I played it like a month before The Last of Us II came out and then I played The Last of Us II and I was kind of around for all of The Last of Us II discourse, which obviously I’m not going to get into.

But the thing that I love about the game and the thing that I love that the TV show did not shy away from is that it wants you to have that reaction of like I stand by what Joel did. It wants you to be like, “I think I would have done the same thing.” And also this is horrific. Yeah, I think that they did that really well and I think especially the way that Bella Ramsey played Ellie’s reaction in that last scene that they have where she is like, “Don’t lie to me.” And you can tell that she knows something is off, right? She doesn’t know what necessarily but she knows something is off. And I’ve been seeing on Tumblr a lot of conversation around the complexity and the nuances of this particular decision and what the narrative wants you to think about it. And it’s been really interesting to watch people have to grapple with the fact that there’s not an easy answer. Right?

Like, you’re not supposed to be cheering at the end. I was talking to a friend who hasn’t played the game but has really been enjoying the TV show. And she hadn’t watched the finale yet. And she was like, “Were you satisfied by the way that they adapted the first season? Did you like the ending?” And I was like, “Yes, I loved the last episode. I think they did a great job. But am I satisfied is an impossible question.” Because in both playing the game and watching the show it’s like, no, you’re not satisfied. You’re kind of left with this pit in your stomach feeling that I love. I love art that makes me feel that way. Because it’s so different from a more clear-cut kind of ... I love John Wick, right? And I think that those movies are very much like, yeah, let’s watch this guy murder a bunch of people because someone killed his dog. Woo hoo! I think there’s a place for that kind of stuff and there’s a place for The Last of Us of, oh, I feel bad about this.

Cherokee: Yeah, it’s very ... even, I feel like my gut emotional reaction was, oh my gosh thank god he’s going to save Ellie – because this is the person that we’ve been rooting for this entire time. But if you flipped the narrative and showed us the fireflies perspective of all of this – I don’t know, I still think that they were making a very ethically questionable decision by not telling anyone that she was going to die.

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: Obviously, that has all of its own ... obviously I’m sure this is where a lot of the discourse is. But it was hard for me to not be like, yeah, I feel good that he did this. But obviously it’s not a good thing that he did. Same with John Wick. I actually just started watching the John Wick movies and I have ... I don’t like when animals get hurt in anything. I can’t handle it.

Lauren: No, yeah, it’s awful.

Cherokee: And everyone was, no, it’s just a small part of it. And so my friends are like, “You are going to watch this, because we’re going to go see John Wick four.” And oh god, hated that first 20 minutes. Oh my god.

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: But I was absolutely vindicated after. It was one dog’s life for 200 people. You know what? That’s why you don’t mess with someone’s dog, man. (laughs)

Lauren: Absolutely. And in heightened reality of John Wick it feels totally justified and it feels completely correct. And I think that yeah because The Last of Us is more grounded ... I don’t know, man, everything you just said I’m just like, once you’re done, I mean, well yeah, I’m curious to see ... again, we’ll have to see what sort of episodes The Last of Us do because they are working on a season two. Yeah, The Last of Us II adds along to this conversation in a very interesting way, in a way that was incredibly divisive for fans and critics.

And also if you don’t like animals getting hurt in anything, maybe don’t play The Last of Us II.

Cherokee: Okay. Got it. Oh no.

Lauren: That was one of the worst mechanics of it for me. And that’s just a general warning to anybody who is thinking about playing that game. If you can’t handle playing a character who hurts animals, don’t play The Last of Us II.

Cherokee: Yeah, I actually think that would be hard for me. But I will play all the way through The Last of Us I.

Lauren: The Last of Us I, you’re fine.

Cherokee: Ready to rock. Yeah, because I was even so sad about what happens to their horse. I was like, oh no.

Lauren: No!

Cherokee: Oh gosh. I just, obviously people dying in shows it’s sad, too, but I don’t know, animal deaths hit differently. I will-

Lauren: They do, because they’re not consenting to the same kind of ... like that horse was just a horse being ridden. That horse didn’t want to get into fights with people. You know?

Cherokee: Probably wants to be running through a field somewhere. You know?

Lauren: Exactly.

Cherokee: Did not ask to be a part of this narrative. (laughs)

Lauren: Exactly. (laughs)

Cherokee: I always have to, when I’m watching a show like this, I always have to remind myself – that horse is okay. That horse is in its little horsey home. It’s fine.

Lauren: Yep, it’s fine. It was treated well.

Cherokee: Yes. It got to hang out with Pedro Pascal and Belle Ramsey. I’m jealous of that horse. So, let’s-

Lauren: Exactly.

Cherokee: ... look at it that way. (laughs)

Lauren: Normally, my inclination would be to replay the games, right? But I’ve done that. And I will jump back in every now and then and play a couple sequences and stuff, or jump into a particular chapter. But the thing that I’m really excited about with the show being so successful and having such an incredible fandom, and we’ll definitely re-blog some of it, but oh my god some of the fan art on Tumblr for this show is like unreal. It’s so beautiful. People are pulling out all the stops.

But one of the things I’m really excited about is after I played The Last of Us II ... I played The Last of Us and The Last of Us II in very quick succession. And after sort of a month of being just buried deep in this game world, the summer of 2020, which was an incredibly weird time, I was like oh my god, I need more of these characters. Where do I turn? I turned to AO3. And the AO3 tag is for video games in general tend not to be enormous. And there’s not a ton of The Last of Us fan fic. And specifically what I am looking for when I’m looking for The Last of Us fan fic is like I just want Joel and Ellie doing dad/daughter stuff. Right?

I just want them being a family and hanging out and being happy and safe. That’s what I’m looking for.

Cherokee: Safe and supportive.

Lauren: Exactly. And so I’m really excited that now the TV show has brought these characters to a much, much wider audience, including probably a lot of very talented fan fic writers who will want to write some stuff post season one. And I cannot wait to read all of those fics. So, that’s what I will be doing. Cherokee, are you just going to be focused on getting through the prologue?

Cherokee: Yeah. I think really I’m just going to dedicate myself to ... any free time I have making it though that final just one more zombie I’ve got to get by, over and over again, but the problem is it’s the one zombie that keeps killing me, but there’s like a whole bunch of game play that just resets quite far back. So, every time I die-

Lauren: Oh no!

Cherokee: ... I have to get ... it’s like the Sisyphus situation that I’m in at the moment. But we’re going to fight through it. And I hope to play through the game. I’ll keep you posted once I make it through the prologue.

Lauren: Please do.

Cherokee: I just loved the show so much. I have watched a lot of titles in the past that have video games or are based on video games and this is ... I’ve always been tangentially kind of interested, but this is the first thing that I’ve watched that immediately made me be like I must play this game. And so I’m really excited about that, to be entering this whole new world, and I hope and feel like I’m sure a lot of people are also entering the world of this game as well. I believe yesterday (as we recorded this March 21st) they released it for PC. So, I think that will open it to a bunch more players as well.

Lauren: Oh wow. Cool.

Cherokee: So, yeah. Just really stoked to play with the pipe knife at some point.

(laughter)

Lauren: Hell yes.

Cherokee: Do you have any tips Lauren?

Lauren: I definitely think taking your time ... in a lot of the combat moving forward once you get past that sort of initial infected are running at you and you’re just trying to escape Austin, a lot of the time that you’re encountering infected it’s like that sequence in the second episode where they’re in that museum in Boston, there’s a lot of that kind of stuff. And that sequence exactly happens in the game. And so take your time. Take your time to really listen , to figure out the best way to get at an infected person, watch their patterns of movement, and that will help you get through those sequences faster because you won’t just be dying over and over again by rushing into things. That’s my advice.

Cherokee: All right. I will keep that in mind. And are there any other Easter eggs or things that you really liked that you noticed as a player throughout the season that new viewers to it wouldn’t have?

Lauren: I mean, definitely yeah. As I mentioned, there were a couple of weapons things that came up. Like the fact that Joel ditches one of the machine guns because he’s like, “Finding ammo for this is so hard.” That’s a real thing in the game. Certain guns just aren’t worth keeping once you’ve run out of ammo for them. Also, when they were in Jackson there were I believe two strong nods to the second game. The first has not been confirmed, although I think Neil Druckmann liked a tweet about it. Which is that the girl that Ellie snaps at when they’re in the dining hall ... I was like, “That is [this] character from The Last of Us II.” I would bet anything. I’m pretty sure that’s her. And also the little baby horse that Ellie pets (Shimmer) is in game two.

Cherokee: Oh my gosh.

Lauren: So, those were two little Easter eggs that I really enjoyed.

Cherokee: Love that. I saw a lot of people talking about how much the scene with the giraffe in the final episode, people loved that.

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: That they took the time to add that in from the game. And it was a real giraffe, which is also really cool that they used.

Lauren: I know! That’s so cool.

Cherokee: I love that. (laughs)

Lauren: So cute and just aw, Bella Ramsey is just so ...

Cherokee: Great things. All the feels.

Lauren: Yeah, all the feels. Do you have a favorite episode or like a favorite moment from the show that has just really stuck with you?

Cherokee: I mean, I feel cliché but episode three just ...

Lauren: Yeah.

Cherokee: I immediately re-watched it. I loved it so much. I really just loved the story and it was just so sweet. And I know that was something that was expanded upon from a smaller story line in the game.

Lauren: Immensely.

Cherokee: I’m really excited to see some more of that in season two as well. And then I just really liked the pun book and the punning tie in throughout.

Lauren: Of course!

Cherokee: Oh my gosh. Love! Ellie, gal after my own heart. (laughs)

Lauren: Absolutely.

Cherokee: Wait, but what was your favorite episode or favorite moment?

Lauren: Hmm. I mean, yeah, episode three was a really astonishing work of art. I think like I mentioned the week it aired I was just like gently crying for 20 minutes straight, which I just don’t often do. I either shed one tear or I sob at TV shows. And this was just like a steady stream of tears for 20 minutes.

But I think my favorite moment was actually in the last episode. It was maybe based on a couple of different moments in the game, but that was for all intents and purposes a new conversation, which is Ellie and Joel talking about how he got the scar on his head. And then her being like, “Oh yeah, I mean, time heals all wounds, right?” And he’s like, “It wasn’t time that did it.” I was like – oh god!

There are so many times in both games where I just want to scream, “Say I love you to each other, you freaks!”

Cherokee: Right!?

Lauren: I feel like this is the closest (laughs) I’ve gotten and it’s so delicious.

Cherokee: Oh my gosh. Yeah. That and the, “I’ve got you baby girl, when she runs out of the burning building.” Ugh, just punch through my heart! Found family! We love to see it.

Lauren: We love to see it. We love to see it.

[gentle music]

Cherokee: Speaking of things that punch us through our heart ... our Feels Corner.

Lauren: Yep.

Cherokee: What has you in your feels this week, beyond just everything about The Last of Us?

Lauren: Always and forever. Well, speaking of found family stuff ... I have been on a Star Wars kick recently, which I think I talked about last time because I went to Galaxy’s Edge at Disney World. And now the Mandalorian is back and the Bad Batch is ending its season soon. And I’m just drowning in wonderful Star Wars content.

But the thing I’m really excited for is that the sequel to Jedi Fallen Order, a video game, is coming out in late April. And I really loved Jedi Fallen Order. I thought it was great. And the game picks up five years after Fallen Order, Jedi Survivor, the one that comes out in April. And to sort of bridge the two, a book called Battle Scars by Sam Maggs came out a couple of weeks ago. And so I’ve been reading that. And it picked up where the ... it picks up a couple of years after the video game ends. And without sort of spoiling too much about the book or about the game, basically it’s about this Jedi and now he’s on this ship with sort of his compatriots and it’s really great found family stuff. And Sam Maggs is just a phenomenal writer. And a wonderful person. And so it’s just been a real delight to read that book.

I’m not done with it yet because I paused. Because I was like, wait a second, I don’t remember some important stuff that happens in Jedi Fallen Order. So, I’m going to go back and replay that game, which is what I’m doing right now. And then I’m going to pick up and continue to read this book because I want to be able to appreciate it fully.

Cherokee: Love it.

Lauren: It’s also exploring one of my favorite things to explore in Star Wars storytelling and something that my other favorite Star Wars book explores, Dark Disciple, which is this ... it’s actually like a very Joel and Ellie coded thing, in my opinion. It’s a similar theme. Which is that the Jedi are not supposed to form emotional attachments, right? That’s their whole thing, is they’re sort of supposed to be separate from the world.

And I love narratives that explore, no, what if Jedi actually do have romances – like in Dark Disciple? Or what if they have a found family that they really love and want to take care of, like in Battle Scars? And how does that complicate their relationship to essentially their religion and their way of life? And that’s something that the Mandalorian is exploring really beautifully as well with Din Jarin’s religion and now raising his son in that. And if you’re looking for Pedro Pascal raising a child again, may I recommend the Mandalorian as a chaser to the shot that was The Last of Us?

Cherokee: My favorite genre.

Lauren: This is what’s got me in my feels. It’s the best genre. Cherokee, what about you? What has you in your feels other than daddy, Pedro Pascal?

Cherokee: Other than daddy Pedro Pascal, I have some other daddy’s in my feels this week. (laughs) Specially Shadow Daddy, if you are a fan of Shadow & Bone, season two came out as we were chatting about earlier and we did an answer time with the full cast and there were, first off, just the interactions between these cast members just warms my fricken heart. And it’s just so much fun to see compared to the characters that they play.

So, the first group we had was Ben Barnes, Jessie Mei Li, and Daisy Head ... Ben is of course the Darkling, Jessie is Alina, and then Daisy is Genya. So, one of the questions that was submitted was, “Who started the nickname shadow daddy?” And (laughs) it turns out it was the actress Danielle who plays Nina in the show – fun fact!

Lauren: Amazing.

Cherokee: It was just a really fun Q&A. I also just have a new blorbo from Shadow & Bone and that is Wylan, played by Jack Wolfe. Jack Wolfe is a perfect little forest nymph of a human being. And is so perfect for the character of Wylan. I really loved season two. Very excited for the next Shadow & Bone and also we did a segment called “Cast Your Votes” where the cast made polls and we actually posted the polls on the Netflix Tumblr. So, you can participate in them.

Lauren: Amazing.

Cherokee: So, we have some great questions in there like “Shadow or Bone?” And that was a really contentious one. Or, “Which crow would be the least helpful in a crisis?” So, you know, a lot of debate, a lot of great stuff. And so yeah, that just really has me in my feels, because that was so much fun. I really loved the books, loved season one, have already been to watch season two.

And also, this is a little kind of pre in my feels thing because it hasn’t premiered yet. I believe it comes out on March 31st, but we’re doing an answer time with the cast of Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves. We’re going to be recording it, it goes live on the 30th. So, I really loved that movie and it was great – can’t wait for it to come out. And that also gave me a lot of feels. And I think there’s going to be multiple of these movies. So, just a lot of great-

Lauren: Ooh!

Cherokee: Yeah. Great stuff coming out. I’m going to go play some more The Last of Us and hopefully make it through the prologue.

Lauren: Good luck and godspeed.

Cherokee: Thank you very much. I will be texting you updates. And in the mean time-

Lauren: Please.

Cherokee: And I’m Cherokee McAnelly and you can find me at Chero.Tumblr.com.

Lauren: And I’m Lauren Shippen, and you can find me at TheLaurenShippen.Tumblr.com.

Cherokee: This has been Dashboard Diaries. And ...

[outtro music]

Lauren: May your anons always be loving.

Cherokee: Your dash always refreshed.

Lauren: Your gifs always be loading.

Cherokee: And your ships always canon.

Lauren: May the fics you’re reading always be finished.

Cherokee: And the answers you seek always in the re-blogs.

Lauren: Thanks for scrolling with us!

We're finally dedicating an entire episode to losing our minds over the TV adaptation of The Last of Us. Also: we all totally stab Caesar and ponder which is better, Shadow or Bone.

Credits and transcript in our reblog. You can find transcripts for this, and every other episode, here.

Find the posts discussed in this episode in this tag!

#DD 17 #transcript

20 notes · View notes

x3rrorx · 1 year ago

Note

“reposting what’s posted online” as if you don’t spend hours digging this shit up like you’re doing something useful.

you’re the biggest bad omens dickrider out there and they probably hate you for bringing up irrelevant shit months and YEARS later.

if they had a problem with anyone they’d handle it privately, your account already got taken down for harassment once… how do you not see that YOU are the problem.

YOU are the one causing problems over situations that have been handled privately. YOU are ruining the fandom, and the band’s crew’s life with your fake, useless, dug-up, irrelevant drama.

Reading messages like this has me laughing my ass off cause of all the incorrect bullshit said. 😂

1) No actually, I had 4 different anonymous users send me information about MG. They sent me the tumble threads. They sent me all the extra information that wasn’t on Twitter/X. They are the ones who continue to send me screenshots of the tweets she posts, as she’s had me blocked since the first day I interacted with her. So very incorrect when you say that I’ve spend all this time looking into her. I scrolled her Twitter. That’s about it.

2) I made 1 single post about MG here on this blog. You guys continue to complain over and over about me constantly talking about her. I made 1 post covering everything I needed to and said I wasn’t gonna continue to talk about it. So at this point you guys bring her up more than I actually mention it.

3) the biggest Bad Omens dickrider… there’s definitely bigger but I mean, sure. That isn’t an insult 😂 I love Bad Omens and they’re one of my favorites. Sorry but that doesn’t hurt my feelings honey.

“And they probably hate you for bringing up irrelevant shit months and years later.” Babe I think you’re messaging the wrong person. You definitely meant to send that one to Noah’s ex “mirror girl”. I didn’t bring anything up. MG posted all about him after they ended things. Whatever. I wasn’t there for that, I don’t know what was posted. Then MG comes back 3 years later to do it again. I’m just reposting what she posted. So no… I didn’t bring up anything. I informed people about what’s going on though.

4) No one said they couldn’t handle their own? Doesn’t mean people don’t have their own opinion on it and can’t talk about it. I’m also not taking initiative on handling anything. Like I said before, I’m just posting about what’s going on.

5) Talking about something that’s been publicly posted online isn’t harassment. Why do you think there are so many tea channels on YouTube. If it was harassment to inform people of things that are already public information then all those channels would be shut down and literally everyone would be in trouble at some point as we all have talked about public situations online. But yeah okay, sure. Whatever you say.

6) I don’t see anywhere on their page that they have talked about any of MG’s drama she caused. So I’m not really sure how I’m “ruining the bands/crews life” you’re being extremely fucking dramatic 😂 I’m also confused on what part was fake? Cause everything I posted was literally screenshots of what MG said herself.

Anyways…

Like I have said over and over… I made 1 post on this blog about MG and had no plans to co to ur talking about her, but when you guys are the only one bringing her up… makes it kind of hard to steer away, don’t ya think. Maybe if you stopped messaging ME about her then I wouldn’t have anything to say on the subject. Right? Right.

Lastly, MG continuously tweets about me. Even after the few days I didn’t have tumblr, she was still making tweets about me. Nothing was even being said on my end. So please explain to me that one 🤔 oh right.

Stay riding MG’s dick though 👋🏻

4 notes · View notes

yessirsargeantbarnes · 3 years ago

Text

Darling

Eddie Munson x Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers? Dom-ish Eddie! Mean Eddie. Choking. Allusion to sexual themes. That’s about it :)

A/N: it’s been ages since I’ve posted my own story! I hope you enjoy! I tried to point to the reader being alternative. Kept it pretty GN, but the nicknames might sound fem. Reblogs & comments are appreciated! Let me know if you’d like more!

Eddie Munson was the bane of your existence. You loathed him with every fiber of your being. You hate him- from the tips of his curly brown hair all the way down to the heels of his doc Martins. You hated Eddie Munson.

Eddie Munson absolutely despised you. He cringed every time he heard your laughter ring throughout the halls of the school. Your smile that stretched all the way to your cheeks made him roll his eyes with a scoff. Eddie hated every part of your perfect self, disgust written clear across his face.

Despite the mutual hatred for each other, you found yourself dragging along to the weekly Hellfire meetings, almost with a slight pep to your step. The Hellfire Club was your only set of friends and relief from the chaotic world around you. Albeit, the leader evidently hated your guts, but you put up with it for the sake of your friends and your love of the game.

It was in Hellfire that you found your home away from home- your escape, sense of self, peace. Eddie always knew how to push your buttons just right, just enough to piss you off. But you kept coming back for more. For the campaign, you swore. In reality, you came not only for the adventure you had worked so hard on, but for the man with the curly hair and loud voice, silver rings adorning his long fingers and strong arms. It was Eddie you really came for.

For what felt like years, you’d watched from the sidelines. The freak of Hawkins High School. The metal head that flunked his classes so many times, he’d had to repeat his senior year- multiple times. The 5 foot 10 god of a man that would have you on your knees in seconds if he’d only so much as smile your way. You’d kept your feelings buried deep down when you realized just how much Eddie disliked you. Swallowed your pride and hurt, mustered up the courage to step into the classroom to see Eddie upon his throne waiting for the gang to arrive for their first meeting of the school year.

And you’d done so every week since. You took it like a champ. With every roll of a low number on the die and tsk-ing of Eddie’s mean shuns, you kept going back. But today seemed worse than the others. Eddie was riled up. And when Eddie was riled up, he was even more mean to you than ever. The guys’ excited chatter died down to a quiet whisper when your boots sounded at the entrance of the room, lingering in the doorway. A flushing of your cheeks burning red, duck of your head and small “hey, guys.” And you took your seat on the opposite side of the table, facing directly at Eddie’s throne.

“Well look who decided to show up!” He scoffed with an absentminded wave of his hand. “How nice of you to join us, darling.” He gritted out. You forced a smile on your face and muttered a bullshit apology and excuse for your tardiness. Eddie stared at you while you pulled your things from your backpack, quickly setting up your station and preparing yourself for what felt like the biggest battle you’d see yet. A sigh and push of your glasses back up your nose and you were ready to start. “Sorry, guys. I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

And so he began.

30 minutes later and half of your teammates had been brutally murdered. Eddie’s maniacal laughter still ringing in your ears as you shook the dice in your hands, wishing a silent prayer to whatever god could hear you, to just let you roll at least a 15. “You got this!” Dustin screamed in encouragement, hands clutched into tight fists. The boys were all either barely sitting on the edge of their seats or standing with sweat dripping down their foreheads. You released the die, watching it tumble down through the middle of the table before it stopped directly in front of the DM.

Wide eyes looked down and then slowly back up. In giddy and tense silence, he picked the plastic piece up and allowed for a grin to spread across his features as he showed the table your number. A 20. Thank fucking Christ. “YES! Fuck!” You let out an exasperated cry of joy. “In your fucking face, Munson! Eat shit!”

Your friends were too busy yelling and jumping around excitedly to register your words, but they were not lost on Eddie. He stood from the table quickly and in a matter of seconds was at the opposite end, grabbing you by the back of the neck and pulling you out of the room, leaving your friends to continue in their giddiness. The door slammed shut, leaving you in silence, save for the excruciatingly tense breaths coming from both you and the man who still had a grip on your neck, only now on the front, pinning you against the wall.

“I-I’m sorry, Eddie. Really! I wasn’t thinking-“ you spilled out quickly, terrified you’d really screwed things up and made him angry- pushed him too far. He only moved his face closer to yours, hot breath fanning over your paling skin, with squinted eyes.

“Shut the fuck up.” Your lips shammed shut, breathing becoming frantic as his scent invaded your lungs. You were afraid you’d suffocate on the smell of faint cigarettes, weed, and heavy pine if he didn’t release you and move away from your trembling figure soon. He towered over you, the tips of his long hair lightly swaying against your blushing cheeks. “Repeat every goddamn word you just said, ~darling~. I wanna hear you say ‘em to my fuckin face.”

Instantly, your mouth ran dry, tongue sticky behind your lips. His hand tightened ever so slightly around your throat. Suddenly, you were parched. “I-I said, ‘In your fucking face, Munson. Eat shit.” You choked out, eyes averting away in an attempt to not meet his hard stare.

“Ah- look me in my eyes when you insult me, precious. Be a big girl.” Your knees felt weak, arms limp at your sides as you slowly lifted your eyes to meet his. You’d never hear the end of this. This was it- he was going to kick you out and you’d lose the only friends you had. You mustered up as much courage as you could, absolutely fed up with the treatment you’d been receiving from Eddie Munson for the past months. You huffed.

“I said, ‘In your fucking face, ~Munson~. Eat. Shit. You fucking prick.” Your chin titled up in an act of bravery and defiance. He released you from his grasp and you heaved in a fresh breath, only blinking for just a second before staring him right back down. He took a step back before lunging right for you, hand grabbing and twisting into your hair making you yelp out at the stinging spreading across your scalp and down your neck.

He didn’t hesitate to crush his plush lips to yours, slipping his tongue inside your mouth. Your knees buckled for a split second before you pushed back with all of your might and you returned the kiss with as much force as he had kissed you. You fought for dominance over him, your hands gripping into the sleeves of his denim jacket, teeth nipping at his bottom lip until a moan lost its way out of his now sore lips. You pulled back, gasping for air.

“You’re an outrageous asshole, Munson. Treating me like shit stuck to the bottom of your shoes like I’m nothing for MONTHS.” You seethed once you’d both caught your breath. “Go ahead, kick me out for shit-talking you after kicking your ass.”

“Kick you out? No- no, I’m not kicking you out!” He chuckled dryly. His eyes shifted down to your feet before dragging up your body, drinking in the sight of you angry with bruised lips and the print of his hand still lingering against the soft skin of your neck. “You won, darling. Can’t deny that. But if you think for one second you’re getting away with that stunt you just pulled- you’re dead wrong.” His legs advanced towards you again, stopping right before you as he leaned down to place a chaste kiss against your lips before moving to murmur against your ear.

“I’m going to fuck the brat straight out of you. We’ll see how you like mouthing off then.” And then he tugged you down the hall, out the doors of the school, leaving your friends behind that had somehow just noticed your absence.

#eddie x reader #eddie munson #Eddie x GNreader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #eddie x y/n

207 notes · View notes

thatredheadwriter · 3 years ago

Text

Addicted

gabriel x hunter!reader

Okay, so what the hell, I’m posting another fic. It seems the old cogs have started moving again, and the writing is really just coming (just not for the things I need to get done like my current series or the asks in my inbox, but hell, productivity is productivity, am I right?). Please let me know if you like this, or any constructive criticism you have.

This is an NSFW one shot featuring a female reader and Gabriel (SPN). Do not read if you are under 18 years of age or are uncomfortable with the following topics:

conversations of a sexual nature

mentions of oral sex (male receiving)

mentions of canon level violence

oral sex (female receiving)

slight dom!Gabriel (if you squint)

pet names

(Y/N) is a hunter friend of the Winchesters, living at the bunker. During a post-hunt “guys’ night” she’s forced to confess that she’s never actually received oral sex. Little does she know an interested eavesdropper is waiting to change that for her, if she wants.

(Author’s Note: I mention the reader being almost thirty years old at one point. I tried to keep it more vague, but I kinda put myself in a place where I had to.)

——————————————————————————

“No, no, no. I’m not selfish, but who in their right mind actually likes giving oral?” Dean was talking with his hands, which meant he was on at least his fifth drink, but not quite to his eighth. Of course, you didn’t need to know him that well to know that bit of information. You’d watched him down the first four quickly, but he was starting to slow down now.

“Ah, come on. That’s such an excuse,” Sam shook his head.

You’d been relatively quiet, nursing your beer and chiming in occasionally, but your mind was still all tangled up in knots from the last hunt and your own personal baggage you’d been dealing with.

The three of you had just finished off a trio of pagan gods and were celebrating back at the bunker with a ‘guys’ night’. Usually you didn’t mind, I mean everything with the boys was strictly platonic, and typically you liked being considered one of the guys. But as rough and tumble as you were, deep down you were still a woman, and it could be hard being surrounded by three manly-man dudes all the damn time.

Usually an occasional run-in with Jody or Donna or another one of the female hunters was enough to fulfill that need, but ever since your last attempt at a bar hookup turned out to be a demon in disguise, you were on edge even more.

“Okay…(Y/N), what about you?”

You’d been lost deep in your own thoughts, so when Dean turned the conversation to you, you were completely caught off-guard.

“What? Sorry, I was…I zoned out there,” you shook your head and finished off the beer you were working on.

“Look, Sam says I’m an ass just because I don’t love giving oral sex as much as I do receiving it. And I think it’s completely normal. So what about you? Do you ~love~ giving as much as you do receiving?”

You laughed and tossed the empty bottle into the nearby trash can.

“I mean, that’s kind of a personal question, don’t you think?”

“Come on, we don’t have secrets,” Dean pried, “Sammy and I have both shared, now it’s your turn.”

“Fine,” you huffed, “When it comes to giving, I guess it’s not something I find particularly thrilling, but I have found that when you’re enthusiastic about the task at hand and really focus on giving your partner pleasure, it can be a good thing for both parties.”

Sam and Dean both nodded in thoughtful consideration, but soon Dean’s expression changed.

“But wait, what about receiving?”

You’d been hoping to avoid that bit of the question.

“I guess in theory it’s nice, but most guys aren’t exactly chomping at the bit to go down on a woman, especially when they don’t feel like they have to, like with a one-night stand.”

“So wait, are you saying-”

“No, Dean. I’ve never received oral before. I’m nearly thirty and no guy, or girl for that matter, has ever offered,” you sighed, bitterness lacing your voice.

“Maybe I should be more generous,” he mused to himself.

“Look, as scintillating as this conversation is, I think I’m going to retire for the night fellas. Keep talking about sex and drinking alone, though. That’s the way to get laid,” you patted Dean’s shoulder and winked at Sam before trudging off to your room.

“Hey, come on!” Dean called after you, “Don’t leave me alone here with Sammy.”

“Um, you didn’t get thrown into the wall by a Chinese river god today, so I think you’re on your own.”

You didn’t stick around to hear Sam’s mock protest, and instead lumbered down the hallway, trying to remember whether or not you’d charged your vibrator recently.

When the door finally shut behind you, you sighed and leaned against it for a moment before kicking off your boots and socks in the general direction of your closet and set to work unbuttoning your flannel.

You’d just stripped off the button-down and your undershirt when a warm hand clapped down on your shoulder. Out of instinct you grabbed your unknown attacker's wrist and twisted hard. You used the leverage to pull him out in front of you. Driving hard, you slammed him face-first into the wall.

Breathing hard, you realized he was giggling. The man turned his face to look at you and you were shocked to see Gabriel’s signature smirk.

“Damn, sugar. I always had a feeling you liked it rough,” you scoffed at his pet name for you, but he just winked. You wordlessly released the hold on his arm and you both stood up straight. It was then that you realized two things. One, all the earlier aches, pains, and blossoming bruises from earlier in the day were gone without a trace. Two, the only thing covering your top half was a lacey, blush colored bra. You usually stuck to more practical underwear, but after getting nasty during the boss fight, you had no choice but to don the frilly lingerie that you’d bought 5 years ago and worn maybe twice since then.

“What the hell are you doing here?” you asked with a disapproving frown, reaching into your closet for your favorite sleepshirt.

“Eh, you know me, I’m always around. And, uh, you're welcome for healing you.”

You rolled your eyes, “Thanks, but that’s not what I meant. Why are you here? In my room?”

Gabriel was wandering around your room, fiddling with the photos, knick knacks, and talismans you had displayed there. You followed after him, putting things back in their place.

“I heard your little conversation downstairs,” he picked up a bronze pendant hanging from your bedpost.

“And?” you snapped, taking it from him and placing it back, becoming annoyed with the trickster’s antics. He usually had better timing than this, knowing when to back off and when you were in more of a mood to deal with his dumbass shenanigans.

“I think it’s absolutely tragic.”

“Wha-...That’s none of your damn business, Gabriel!”

“You’re right,” he mused, “But I thought I could at least offer to make it my business.”

Gabriel was giving you a seductive look now, and you couldn’t say you’d never thought about him in a sexual context. He slowly stalked towards you, and you walked backwards at the same pace, both frightened and excited by the raw hunger in his eyes.

“Gabriel, w-what are you doing?” you couldn’t help the shake in your voice. Your back soon hit the cold wall behind you and you gulped as he closed the distance.

“I’m making you an offer, sugar,” he smirked down at you, raising one hand to cup your chin and tracing your bottom lip with his thumb. His knee slotted in between your denim clad thighs, eliciting a whimper. “I want to give you all the pleasure in the world. I want to feel you come undone under my fingers and my tongue, over and over again. I just need you to do one thing.”

“What?” you breathed.

“I need to know that you want this. I need you to ask for it.”

You whimpered, but Gabriel only shook his head, “I need words, (Y/N).”

“Please, Gabriel,” you whined, “I want you.”

That’s all the archangel needed to attach his lips to yours.

When his tongue entered your mouth, you didn’t even try to fight for dominance, and instead just let him take the lead. His arms snaked around you, holding you close, and you used the proximity to grind down on his thigh.

He pulled away to whisper in your ear, “Needy girl, aren’t you?”

Before you could respond he pulled you off of the wall and tossed you gently onto the bed. You watched, enamored, as he removed his button-down shirt, revealing the tanned skin underneath. While he didn’t have a six pack, you were pleasantly surprised by a fair amount of definition.

He fixed you with a predatory gaze and began approaching you and the bed. As he stalked towards you, you shuffled backwards on the bed, until there was no one else to go. The predatory nature of your exchange only added to the growing wetness in your panties.

When he finally caught up to you, his mouth found yours again, but didn’t stay there long. Soon he was making his way down your exposed neck and chest, leaving small bite marks and hickies in his wake. He reached your bra and looked up to give you another mischievous smirk. With a snap of his fingers, your bra had disappeared, and he instantly set to work on your breasts.

Sure you’d been with guys before who liked your boobs, but they were only really interested in them while they were fucking you. It was an extra, not their main focus. But with Gabriel, it was like the only thing he cared about was admiring your tits. It was near blasphemy the way he worshiped them

He kissed and sucked hickies over each of them before taking a nipple in his mouth and teasing it with his tongue. You arched your back up into him when he took it between his teeth. Gabriel went on to repeat the same on the other breast before tracking lower.

Gabriel hadn’t even got to your waistband and he already had you more aroused than most men did in the entire time you spent with them. He soon found the button of your jeans.

For the second time since you’d started, he looked up again, but this time there was more than his usual smirk.

“You still want to do this sweetheart?” he asked, his low voice rumbling straight into your core.

“Yes, dammit,” you swore out of impatience. You expected him to snap his fingers again to remove them, but instead he took his time, first undoing the button and zipper before slowly pulling them down. You lifted your ass off the bed as the fabric was pulled lower.

Once he’d pulled them free of your legs and tossed them somewhere south of the bed, he began kissing back up your right leg. Just as he was nearing the place where you needed him the most, still covered by your gray cotton panties, which by now had a noticeable and growing wet spot, he skipped over it and kissed down your other leg.

You let out a frustrated sigh, but Gabriel just chuckled in response. After one last kiss to the inside of your ankle, he made his way back up to your core, and let out a breath over your still-clothed slit.

“Please, Gabriel, stop teasing!” you whined. He just smiled and cupped your sex through the fabric. Even the lightest touch over the fabric made you jump, already worked up from his relentless teasing.. In one swift motion, he grabbed hold of the fabric and ripped it away from your body.

Before you had time to complain about his destruction of property, his mouth was on you and you finally understood what was so great about oral. Out of instinct, your hips writhed beneath him, but you weren’t sure if they were trying to escape or get closer.

But Gabriel wasn’t letting you off so easy. One arm came up to rest over your pelvic bone, successfully locking your lower half down to the mattress beneath you. His other hand made its way between your legs and soon one of his long, slender digits slipped into your sex.

Moans and curses fell from your lips like prayers, but you couldn’t bother to hold anything back. Gabriel was taking you into complete and utter pleasure like you had never felt before, and you didn’t give a damn who heard. He ate at you like a starving man.

Soon another finger joined the first, and then a third. There was a slight burn, but it was all forgotten the moment he found the delicate spot on the front of your walls and didn’t let go. Between his tongue and teeth nipping and sucking at your clit and the surrounding flesh and the fingers relentlessly caressing your g-spot, you were close.

“God, Gabriel,” you all but screamed. Your train of thought was interrupted by another wave of pleasure. You threw your head back as you felt your orgasm building in your belly, barrelling at you like a bullet train.

“I-I’m gonna,” you stuttered out through gasping breaths, but couldn’t finish. Just then, Gabriel’s fingers sped up inside you.

“I know,” he raised his head slightly, “You can cum. Just do one thing for me.”

“Anything,” you gasped.

“Look at me when you cum,” he ordered. And that was the last thing you heard before his mouth dipped back down to finish what he had started.

Your orgasm hit you harder than you knew was possible. Despite all your muscles tensing at once and the immense pleasure surging through every nerve ending, you managed to do what Gabriel asked. Even as your thighs attempted to close around his skull, he kept going, tilting his head up so he could make eye contact with you. Something about looking into his gorgeous eyes made it that much more intense.

Finally the pleasure ebbed and the things that brought you so much pleasure just moments before were uncomfortable, bordering on painful. You pulled back, and to your relief Gabriel released his iron grip on you, but he chased you as you moved, still lapping at your pussy.

“Gabe, Gabe, enough,” you sighed, feeling overstimulated and like your limbs had turned to jelly.

He gave you an innocent look, ironic since the archangel had just given you one of the most sinful nights of your life.

“I’m sorry, sugar. I just can’t help myself. You’re too damn sweet,” he sat up as he spoke, and as if to prove a point he sucked each of his fingers clean. His face, from the bridge of his nose down, shone with slick, and he smelled like pure sex.

You were just going to comment on his appearance when you noticed he was still wearing his pants, and they were sporting a large tent. With a deep breath to try and get some energy back, shake off the sleep that was already threatening to overtake you, you finally spoke.

“I think it’s your turn,” you tried your best for a seductive grin but you had a feeling it didn’t exactly land that way, based on Gabriel’s obvious amusement.

“Sweetheart, if you really want to suck my dick or go another round, I’m all for it, but you don’t have to do anything. In fact you look positively fucked out already.”

“Really, I don’t mind-” you started, moving towards him on shaky limbs.

“I don’t want you to ‘not mind’,” he looked at you seriously now, “Anything between us has got to happen because you and I both want it to.”

Gabriel took your hand in his and pressed a tender kiss to your knuckles. He kissed you again on the wrist and on and on until he reached your neck and used his position to pull you against his bare chest.

“I’ve wanted to do that…this, for so long,” he breathed into your hair as he pulled you into a more comfortable position. A warm sensation washed over you and the sticky feeling between your thighs and the mild post-orgasm headache were gone.

“So you’d want to do that again?” you mumbled, settling into his chest. Usually you weren’t a cuddler or a big pillow-talker after sex, but nothing about this encounter had been normal.

“Of course. I think I’m addicted to you.”

thatredheadwriter’s Masterlist

#gabriel spn #gabriel x reader #gabriel smut #gabriel fluff #gabriel spn fluff #gabriel spn smut #gabriel x reader smut #gabriel x reader fluff #dom!gabriel #dom!gabriel x reader #dom!gabriel x sub!reader #gabriel x hunter!reader #gabriel is my guilty pleasure

507 notes · View notes

iwadori · 4 years ago

Note

Hiiii!!!! can you do like when you guys are supposed to meet up and they waited for about an hour or so and kept texting you you but you haven't replied so they thought you ditched them and got mad at you and stuff then they decided to go home and while on their way home not too far from their school they found you unconscious body with a large wound on you back and your head bleeding?.

can you pleaseease do tsukishima, yamaguchi, ushijima, bokuto (I'm sorry if that's a lot)

Haikyu Boys when you get hurt Pt 2 (Ushijima,Bokuto

Part One Part Two Part Three

Word count: 2.6K

Genre: angst, fluff

masterlist

Ushijima

You were having the worst week this week, from battling a cold and your boss making you do all sorts of extra jobs (that were definitely not under your job description.) As easter was swiftly approaching you and Ushijima had your annual plans of going to the local kids community center and helping them with an easter egg hunt. But you don’t think you can manage it this year.

Ushijima gets home from practice with 4 bags just filled with easter eggs ranging from all different sizes, “woah there Toshi, you’ve got enough there too feed all of england” you laugh

“I don’t think these eggs will be able to sustain England Y/N” he says seriously making you laugh even harder. As you were laughing, you felt another migraine come along making your cringe in pain. “Toshi, I don’t think I can do the easter egg hunt this year?”

He sits down next to you alarmed that something is wrong, “why what happened Y/N” he asks

“I’ve been feeling terrible all week, and I even have a migraine right now” you say to him thinking he would understand.

“That’s it?” he questions thinking what you said was a joke “I think you can handle a migraine, remember we’re doing this for the kids”

His words were making you feel slightly guilty since maybe you were being over dramatic. “Y/N if it’s really ‘that bad’, i’ll make you some tea so you can feel better,” he says going into the kitchen to start on your tea. You murmur a quiet “thank you” and you end up falling asleep, hoping that by the time you wake up your head stops pounding.

As you wake up, you realise you slept all the way through the night and over to the next day as when you look at your clock it says 12:32 pm. You look at your nightstand and saw that Ushijima wrote you a note saying:

Y/N I've left out early to set out the easter egg hunt, I’ve made you breakfast so eat up and get prepared for the event which starts at 4pm. Please don’t forget.

Sincerely – Ushijima Wakatoshi.

You chuckle at the fondness of the note, before realising your pain. Your brain felt like it was having a live concert inside that definitely was not going to end soon but you still got up prepared for the day. You didn’t want to let Ushijima or the kids down.

When you go to the kitchen , you see the cute breakfast that Ushijima made you consisting of all of your favourite foods and with another simple note of him saying ‘ I love you. ‘ Ushijima has always been a lovely boyfriend, treating you like the queen you are always making sure that you were okay. Of course, his bluntness and his lack of social cues was something to get used to but when you did get accustomed to it, it only made you fall in love with him more.

You got ready, feeling even more sick as the piping hot shower that you usual have, did not help as when you were showering you felt heavily faint. However, you persevered since you did not want to let Ushijima down.

You finally were prepared to leave the house, with the community center being on 15 minutes walk away you were leaving out at 3:50pm since you were planning to take your car anyways. When you leave your home, you realise that you forgot your car keys so you dash up the stairs (a bit too quickly) to go and find them. Scrambling through your draws, your head is pounding harder and harder and the more it pounds the quicker your moving making you even more faint. You eventually find your keys and you’re ready to zoom to the community center but your body gave out and you pass out tumbling down the stairs landing at your front door.

Ushijima was waiting outside of the community center waiting for you to arrive it was 4:05pm and he was wondering where you were (knowing that your place was only a 10 minute drive away) he sent you a few texts asking where you were but when you don’t respond Ushijima becomes slightly annoyed, plastering a fake smile on his face and entering the community center, starting the easter egg hunt.

The easter egg hunt came to a close at 8pm and Ushijima assumed that you would’ve showed up some time in the middle of the event, but you obviously didn’t show. After making sure that all the kids left safely Ushijima decided to call and text you more and when you continuously don’t respond and your calls go to voicemail he says ‘Y/N, im really disappointed with you right now. How could you do this to me? You said you would show up, the kids were really upset, how could you be so selfish?’

He walks to your house knocking on the door, but when you don’t immediately answer he knew something must be up now, since you haven’t responded to any of his texts and calls and didn’t show up he figured there was something deeper then you just ditching the event.

He used his key to open the door, surprised when the door hit something. He tried again hitting the ‘object’ that was laying at the door again. He carefully pushes the door to make enough room for him to fit through the gap. When he entered, he was startled at the sight of you, there you lay completely knocked out with a blood stain next to your head. He knelt down next to you and touched your cheek you were extremely cold, he had to get you to a hospital stat. He called an ambulance, panicked. Worrying about how long you’ve been out for since it would have to be atleast more than 4 hours he assumed.

You woke up in a foreign room, with your head slightly stinging. You place your hand on the back of your head and wince, then you remember you need to be at the easter egg hunt so you bolt up ready to move.

“I don’t think that’s wise for you to do that Y/N” Ushijima says to you

“Toshi, what happened?” you ask still in pain

“It seems you fell down the stairs and hit your head” after he said that all your memories come flooding back, and you remember rushing to the community centre, looking for your keys, and then falling down the stairs and everything going black.

“I’m sorry Ushi for missing the easter egg hunt, I really tried to get there,” you say with an apologetic look on your face

“It’s fine Y/N of course you wouldn’t of been able to get there after falling down the stairs” he says “Also, this is proof of why you shouldn’t run down the stairs”

You eventually get discharged with the doctor telling you all you need to do is rest and stay off your feet. Ushijima took the doctor's orders very seriously, becoming your loyal servant and waiting on you hand and foot, tending to your every need. He did also make you were eating healthy and taking all your medicine so you could have the best recovery possible.

Also, after realising that this could’ve all been avoided if Ushijima didn’t guilt trip you in the first place for having a migraine, he made sure to never ignore or dismiss when you say you are ill or have anything wrong with you even if it’s a migraine, a lost limb or a simple paper cut.

Bokuto

The Olympics were coming up and Bokuto couldn’t be any more excited than he already was. Everything he’s talked about for the past month he manages to find a way to relate to the Olympics, and as annoying as it got sometimes you were just as excited for it as much as Bokuto was.

Bokuto was heavily busy with extra practices so you were bored and lonely, since your boyfriend was at practice all the time so you chose to take up a new hobby. You decided to paint, although you weren’t an award-winning painter you still found joy in it. Being Bokuto’s girlfriend you had some slight unwanted attention on you: the usual fans of Bokuto that just followed you to have an extra aspect of him in their life's, or his fangirls that adored him.

You didn’t mind the fangirls for the most part since majority of them were pretty tamed and did fawn over your relationship. However, there was the minority of fans that did make it known to you that they DID NOT like you at all. When you started posting your paintings, it seems their hate for you amplified since they always found the need to leave an astray of mean comments on your post. But that didn’t mainly bother you since you thought that they only had that energy behind the screen.

The days went by getting closer to the Olympics, with Bokuto always asking you every day “Y/N you are coming to my games, right?” to which you always replied “Of course Kou, I’m coming” which always made him smile.

When the Olympics came, you’ve went to all the games cheering Bokuto and the team on as they were winning round after round. Whilst this was going on, the group of girls that were sending you horrible messages and making mean posts about you weren’t stopping. At first, you didn’t care for them but it seems their posts only gotten worse making comments about your artwork, your face, your body type ect.

You didn’t want to tell Bokuto as you felt that it would ruin his Olympic momentum and you thought you could handle it all on your own.

It was nearing to the final game of the Olympics, and Bokuto was ecstatic he made sure that you promised you’d be there claiming that you was his ‘good luck’ charm.’ You were excited to go too, the feeling of watching Bokuto play was exhilarating seeing him fully in his element was great for you to see.

On the last game day, Boktuo was already at the stadium since him and the team had to be there earlier to practice and you planned to meet him there just before the game started at 4:30. You went to a florist before the match getting Bokuto the biggest boquet that you could buy.

On your way to the stadium you here somebody whistle from behind you, you turn around and see a group of girls waiting behind you smirking. “Hi?” you say more like a question then a statement “do you want something from me?”

Some of them laugh, but the one standing at the front who you mentally lable the ‘main one’ steps closer to you and says “We want you to stay away from Bokuto” you realise that these were the girls sending you hate online for these past weeks.

Before you can even blink, the girls jump you, hitting, kicking and clawing at you. You are in pain, screaming and crying for them to stop and leave you alone. You lay there, letting them beat you up thinking that you’ll probably end up dead out of this. All you can think about is Bokuto, you didn’t get to wish him good luck, or give him your flowers (that you spent a fortune on) or even tell him that you loved him one last time.

You think the girls eventually stopped but you couldn’t tell because your body was throbbing and you hurt all over. You tried to get up still wanting to go to the match but you collapse going out cold.

Bokuto was scanning the crowd over and over for you, hoping to spot you there. But he couldn’t, he was wondering where you were getting sadder and sadder by the second since he really believed you were his good luck charm and he probably wouldn’t be able to win without at least seeing your face once.

They didn’t win. Bokuto knew he wasn’t playing at his best, since all his mind was on was thinking about where you were. You’ve never missed one of his games, so he was incredibly worried. After he accepted his second-place medal, he rushed out the stadium to go to your house but he was stopped by some fangirls ‘I guess signing autographs is the least I can do’ he thinks, the fans were being a bit odd today but he didn’t have time to focus on that as his mind was racing thinking about you and your whereabouts.

One of his fans did give him an alarmingly big boquet of roses which he appreciated ‘these must of cost a fortune’ he thinks. Although it was a probably a long shot, he decided to ask the fan if he saw someone who looked like *whatever you look like* to maybe see if someone else saw you. Which the fan replied “yeah I saw them with some guy at this restaurant whilst we were going to see you!” they exclaimed.

‘A guy’ he thought ‘that most likely wasn’t you.’ Seeing Bokuto’s confusion, the fan followed up with “I'm pretty sure it was her I mean we all know who Bokuto Koutaro’s girlfriend was.” Bokuto didn’t reply just walking away making sure to thank them for the flowers.

He was rushing towards your house on foot (since all the taxi’s and ubers were fully booked because of the Olympics) whilst running he stumbles across your passed out body all black and bruised with scratch marks and bleeding all over you. “what happened” he whispered, knowing you obviously weren’t going to respond.

He picked up your near-dead body, and cradled you in his arms taking you back to the stadium (since he knew that getting an ambulance to come here or running to the hospital would basically be impossible.) When he got back to the stadium, he did get odd looks from strangers but he didn’t care, his only agenda was making sure you were okay.

You woke up, and saw Bokuto pacing the room repeatedly you tried to get his attention by saying his name but your throat was damaged. He eventually notices you and runs to your side, stroking your face softly and giving you a gentle hug making sure not to hurt you.

“Who did this Y/N?” he asks with worry in his eyes

You ignore his question and look at the silver medal wrapped around his neck making you sad “I’m sorry I didn’t make it to the match, I tried I really did try” you said with your voice sounding even worse after you said every word.

“Don’t be silly, I’m just glad that you’re okay babe, I was really worried about you.” he said

The Medic came in and said that you had multiple broken ribs, but beside that you were fine you just needed to rest your throat and let your bruises heal. You eventually told Bokuto that it was some of his fans, he was upset that you hid this from him for so long but he was just glad that he got to you as soon as he did. He managed to play at the next Olympics and you were there fully present, with your even bigger boquet of flowers watching win gold.

Authors Note: I tried to make it as close to your request as possible, but I hope you enjoy as I really do think this is my favourite work so far.... :3 Comments and feedback appreciated.

#haikyuu x reader comfort #haikyu scenarios #haikyu #haikyu angst #haikyu fluff #haikyu headcanons #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu-fluff #haikyu x reader #ushijima imagine #ushijima oneshot #ushijima angst #ushijima x reader #bokuto x reader #bokuto angst #koutarou x reader #bokuto scenarios #signedwithane😌

1K notes · View notes

jadequeen88 · 4 years ago

Text

Smart Girls Make Fast Learners

NSFW 18+ ONLY. MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!

My contribution to the BNHarem’s monthly collab. The theme was SEx work. ⛓This piece is a first real deep dive into darker themes and was actually really, really exciting to write. 🖤 A massive thanks to my dear friend @libiraki for beta reading this.

TW: yandere behavior, toxic relationship, degradation, non-con, dub-con, degradation/praise kinks, mind break, oral (M and F receiving), over stim, loss of virginity, mentions of physical violence.

DISCLAIMER: I do not condone this type of relationship. This is a work of fiction and if this happens IRL please get out of the relationship!

There is a very specific type of dread that occurs when you discover that the person you built your world around has been lying to you. Tamaki Amajiki was experiencing this brand of betrayal for the first time in his twenty-one years on a rainy Tuesday in October in the dim lighting of your dorm room. His grip tightened around the open laptop as he stared at glimpses of flesh in the thumbnails of the many, many videos posted to the site. Previous live streams with thousands of views. He gulped down the bile in his throat as he scrolled through the videos. His shock and disgust morphed into a pure rage as he counted up the live streams that you’d had since first kissing him. 12. There had been twelve. Three times a week for the past four weeks.

Those big doe eyes that looked into his eyes as you tentatively licked the tip of his cock for the first time… mere hours later they were rolling in the back of your head as you got off for strangers on the internet. He couldn’t take it. You were his first… everything… he knew that you hadn’t been innocent in your past. The way your tongue expertly wound around his when you first kissed him amongst your plush pillows and goose-down comforter reminded him of the fact. The low violet LED lighting of your bedroom made him feel like the two of you were in your own ethereal world. He could forgive you for not waiting for him as he’d waited for you.

For the past four years, he kept to the shadows. He was there when the football player from freshman year cheated on you with one of your terrible friends (and when it happened the second, third, fourth time). He was there to binge your favorite shows with you (“*insert current guy you were fucking* just doesn’t get it, he’s not into it. I’m so glad I’ve got you to watch it with!”) He bit back the heartache that would wash over him when you’d pet him and coo over him… you didn’t see him as a man. He wanted to bend you over and prove he could fuck your brains out. He KNOWS he’d be perfect for you. But he never rejected the attention. He smiled and accepted whatever crumbs fell from your table. Whether it be helping you study or letting you complain about your shitty friends or your shitty jock boyfriends or your shitty parents… He gave and gave and gave… until that one day, 35 days ago to be exact, a shift in the tide occurred.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

“So why don’t you have a girlfriend, Tama-kun?”

“Wh-wha?”

Tamaki dropped the pencil he’d been using and before he could bend to get it himself, your hand was on his thigh and he was putty in your grasp. You giggled and cooed over him like you always did, but this time you did it while assaulting his mouth and neck with your skilled tongue. This time, for the first time, you made Tamaki feel like a man. Like YOUR man.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Over the next few weeks, Tamaki had become quite skilled in pleasing a woman. It only took a little guidance to have him sucking at your clit with just the right amount of pressure. He learned on his own how to couple that with his long, delicate fingers twisting and pumping in and out of your slick hole. You’d cling to his silky hair, pulling him closer as a constant stream of praise tumbled from your lips:

“No one has ever made me feel this good.”

“Your fingers are perfect Tama-kun”.

“I love your mouth on me so much, baby.”

The first time you came on his face, Tamaki knew there was a god because he’d found heaven between your thighs.

But that was gone now… ripped away with one mouse click on the night he was going to finally give you his virginity. He had held on to it like it was a treasure. A treasure he’d present to you one day wrapped up in life-long devotion and worship... But Tamaki wasn’t in heaven anymore. He wasn’t going to worship you tonight. For the first time since laying eyes on you, Tamaki wanted to hurt you.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

You turned the shower off and dried yourself. Wiping the condensation from the mirror, you couldn’t help but smile at your reflection. You felt like this was going to be the first time giving your body to someone. Tonight was a redo. You were wiping the slate clean. Your first time would no longer be underneath the football captain in the passenger seat of his truck, left feeling sore and unsatisfied. It was going to be with the guy you should have noticed long ago. It would be soft and slow… passionate and filled with sweet words and caresses… limbs tangled in soft sheets that smell like lavender and vanilla.

You applied your lotion and moisturized your face. The red lace adorning your body was arranged perfectly, accentuating the soft swell of your hips and chest. With one last glance in the mirror and adjustment of your bra, you opened the door to the cool air of your dorm room…

...And saw Tamaki looking murderous.

His eyes slowly left the screen to meet your gaze. His tear-stained face had never looked this harsh. His normally sweet eyes were narrowed and red from crying. The sweet lips you’d licked and sucked with such tenderness were hard and cold as they pulled upward in a grimace.

The only thing he said before rising from the bed and setting aside your laptop was your camgirl username. Then he was on you before you could draw a breath to explain.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Tamaki always thought he liked you best on top of him showering him with kisses and threading your fingers through his hair, but he had to admit… having your arms tied to a bed frame with the silky sash of your bathrobe cutting into your skin was doing things to him. When you sniffled, face stained with tears and snot, his dick twitched in his boxers. The whines you were choking back behind the silky red panties stuffed down your throat sent chills up his spine. You had to learn the hard way not to spit them out after a harsh slap echoed against your skin when you fought back the first time.

Tamaki stood back to survey the mess of skin, spit, and tears for a moment. You were a blank canvas for him to mark up with his rage and lust. You tried to hide away your bare pussy by clenching your thighs together. It only spurred him on.

“Do you have any clue what you’ve done?” he hovered over you, sleek muscles rippling over your own soft body, “I waited, and waited, and WAITED,” he bit down on the side of your exposed neck and you screamed behind the silky gag, trying your best not to expel it from your mouth and receive more punishment.

“I want to give you everything, Y/N,” he licks over the bite, almost apologetically, “I don’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want it to happen like this… FUCK, why?! Why did you ruin this?” his long fingers dug into your cheeks as he forced you to meet his fiery gaze. You couldn’t help whimpering and sniffling back more clear runny snot. You were so humiliated at how disheveled and disgusting you must look. His head ducked into the soft spot between your neck and shoulder and you felt him sob.

Despite the abuse he’d inflicted upon you in the last ten minutes, you nuzzled your cheek into the top of his head in an attempt to comfort him. And he let you… he hated himself for it and he hated you for making this all so hard for him.

“No… no, no, no,” he rose from the bed to set up your ring-light and laptop, ice running through your veins at the sight. Your mind couldn’t accept what was about to happen.

“I’m... I’m not letting you get away with this,” he shook his head and pulled at his hair as he finished setting everything up, “If you’re insisting on being a slut, you’ll be MY slut. And everyone will know…” he jerked your ankle to force you flat on your back.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Maybe if he’d let the gag out of your mouth, you’d be able to tell him this was just a job to you. That it was clinical… that he was the only one who had ever been able to get you off, that his face was the only one you’d come on… that you needed the money since your parents had disowned you…

But you only laid there, accepting whatever he was going to dish out. You knew he was hurt. You weren’t stupid. You overlooked him while knowing how he felt about you. It took years of horrible one-night stands and countless frat parties pretending that whatever guy you’d picked that night was interesting for you to come to your senses. You hated yourself for being so blind for so long… You adored Tamaki, truly. And you hated yourself for all the times you’d hurt him… so you swallowed your fear and tried to prepare yourself for whatever came next.

⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸⫸

Any soft parts of Tamaki that you’d grown to love were gone, hardened by heartache and desperation. After angling the laptop to get the perfect shot, he started the live stream countdown. Subscribers started trickling in, commenting on how this was a pleasant surprise since it wasn’t one of your regularly scheduled streams. You shut your eyes to pretend this wasn’t real.

Without fanfare or warning, Tamaki ripped apart your thighs, exposing your bare slit. A raw shrill was pulled from your lungs, your back arching from the sting of an abrupt slap. Neurons fired off in your brain… were you in pain? Was it pleasure?

“Since my girlfriend likes to keep secrets from me, I can’t trust what comes out of her whore mouth,” he emphasized his point by stuffing his fingers past your lips, pushing the soaked silk further into your throat, “So she’s going to keep this gag right here until I can fuck the truth out of her,” he trailed his fingers along your reddened folds. Were you getting wet? Horror and shame blossomed in your chest. The fact that you were growing aroused wasn’t lost on Tamaki. His foreign, sadistic grin was back… aimed directly into your soul.

“So that’s what you like, huh?” His nails bit into your thighs leaving tiny crescents behind, “I’ve been too nice? Too soft?” He pushed your thighs impossibly wide, the stretch causing you to moan. He hovered over your core, onyx orbs blown wide with a mix of hate and lust. Tamaki looked like the devil himself and you wondered just how fucked up you were for wanting his punishment.

He opened his mouth and lolled out his tongue, never severing the desperate gaze you both shared, his intertwined with hunger, yours with fear. You’d never noticed how long and thick his tongue was and couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel caressing every ridge and crevice of your inner walls. He flattened the warm, wet muscle and pressed it along your slit. As he slowly slid it closer and closer to your burning clit, you whimpered and bucked your hips chasing the pleasure you knew he was capable of giving… but this was not your sweet boy and he wasn’t doing any of this for your pleasure.

He slung his arm over your lower stomach and growled into your drenched lips. You were pinned down, helpless against his torturous tongue. Fresh tears pricked at your eyes as you remembered how he’d let you pet him and buck into his face, how sweetly he’d ease you into a gentle release. Not this time… it was all teeth and sharp sucks, his tongue forcing you open violently. You were being shoved over a cliff and despite the horror and violence of what was happening to you. You were approaching an orgasmic state at record speed. Tamaki caught on and doubled down. The arm that wasn’t pinning you into the mattress pulled your leg down straight, your knee in a death grip. The new angle made the sensations even more intense. His face pressed harder into your core and you noticed that at some point, he’d started weeping, small sobs vibrating against your skin. The overwhelming mix of emotions and the vigor in which he was eating you shoved you over the edge.

He kept going along at the same speed with the same determination through your orgasm until it became painful. You pushed past it as best you could, allowing him to sob into your over-sensitive skin until he had his fill. As the pain started intermingling with pleasure, your legs shook and the gag couldn’t hold your screams back any longer. You released against his tongue once more, both of you sobbing. He laid against your thigh for what felt like an eternity before he lifted himself to lay on top of you, his hip bones digging into your soft thighs. You could feel the bulge through the thin material of his boxer briefs. Your hips rose to meet it, a pleading gesture filled with the desire to comfort and please him. Your eagerness encourages his mercy, there’s a meek cry that leaves your lips when the damp silk slips from between your teeth.

“Please baby… I’m so, so sorry I didn’t tell you…” your voice was as weak as a kitten’s cry and Tamaki couldn’t deny it made his heart (his dick) clench.

“Say it…” his lips were close enough to kiss, but you resisted… fearful of what he’d do if you did.

“Say what, Tama?” your eyes were wide with concern and confusion. You were desperate to please him.

He turned your face to the camera that you’d forgotten was there and the gravity of the situation crashed around you again. New tears leaked from your stinging eyes as Tamaki whispered into your ear.

“Say that you’re a lying whore…”

“I..I’m a lying whore…”

The last syllable broke as your abused throat grew accustomed to speaking again. He rewarded you with a soft kiss to your cheek and your eyes closed at the tender gesture. The familiar pain in your chest welled to the surface causing even more tears to escape.

“And tell everyone that you’re my own personal slut”

You repeated the phrase to the audience behind the screen and he hummed with approval, trailing one finger along your wet cheek.

“Good girl…” the praise sent shivers through your wrecked body.

“And tell them from now on, your boyfriend will be the only one making you come… that they only get to see you be HIS slut.”

You noticed the chat going absolutely haywire at your announcement. Before Tamaki shut your laptop, you realized you’d made three times as much as you’d ever made before and a twisted sense of accomplishment filled your cloudy mind.

“Please,” your voice came out in a croak, “Please untie me. I wanna make it up to you,” his clothed bulge was burning into your core and you could tell he was close to breaking.

“Please let me make you feel good. I’m so, so sorry,” the clench of your thighs around his waist made him whimper.

He reluctantly pulled away to sit on the foot of the bed. The way he curled in on himself hugging his knees made him appear so small, so fragile… a complete change from the man who’d just manhandled you into restraints.

“You’re a liar…” you almost didn’t hear the whisper, his face buried into his knees.

“Please!” you were losing feeling in your hands and all you wanted was to be free to comfort him.

His eyes met yours and it was your Tamaki again... Your sweet boy… the snarling, green beast that threatened to devour you was sleeping now after it reached its fill of violence. He crawled over your body and released your restraint. Before you even regained feeling in your hands, you wrapped your arms around him. You littered his collarbone with sweet kisses and apologetic sobs. He began to melt into your affectionate gestures and you wrapped your legs around his waist pulling him impossibly close. Wet lips met and your tongues fought against each other for dominance. Hips began to roll against each other, increasing pressure until you both gasped.

The violence was gone, but this was still not a gentle coupling like you’d been planning. Tamaki pulled away and freed his straining cock from his boxers. The skin-to-skin contact made your eyes roll back into your skull. You felt his long fingers grasp your throat, squeezing to remind you just how powerful they were. You shuddered in response, arching upward into his touch, chasing that high his dominance was giving you.

With one swift motion, Tamaki speared you onto his cock. With the minimal prep he’d given you, the stretch was agonizing. This was by far the largest cock you’d ever taken and it stole your breath from your aching lungs. You moaned earning a visceral reaction from the boy on top of you.

Tamaki stayed as still as he could. He refused to come so soon… not when he’d waited so long for this. He tightened his grip on your throat and tentatively rocked his hips into yours. It didn’t take long for it to progress into the most frantic love-making you’d ever experienced.

There was no other way to describe it, he was hate fucking you… biting and sucking your chest until blood bloomed under your skin… hammering into your sore, sticky cunt with total abandon… he was using you like a toy, taking out all his frustrations on your body.

It was ecstasy.

When his hips stuttered as he met his release, the spasms of his tip against your gummy walls sent you into a painful orgasm. You were spent and it seemed like he was too. Your fingers twitched over the crown of his head, wanting to run your fingers through his hair but too scared to initiate any contact with him. As if he could read your mind, he grabbed your hand and placed it on his head. You sighed and began carding through the tangles, gently undoing them. You felt a stream of tears running down your chest as you worked your fingers through his strands. Lifting his face gently, you met his teary gaze with your own.

“Don’t…” he drew in a shuddering breath, “ever lie to me like that again…” the monster behind his eyes stirred quietly, a malicious glint in his eye, before shifting back into your gentle boyfriend.

“Never, I swear to you, baby…” he lets you lift his chin gently to meet your lips. His eyes close and he sighs into your kiss. His muscles relax and when his eyes open again, his warm, adoring expression falls over your face. The hand that wanted to choke the life out of your eyes minutes ago now caresses your jaw tenderly,

“I trust you…” his lips turn up into a grin that’s just a little too wide, “Because you’re a smart girl, aren’t you?” his top lip brushed against your still trembling bottom lip…

“Y-yes…”

You were fucked. This whole situation was fucked up and you weren’t blind to the fact. But as Tamaki nuzzled into your neck placing soft kisses and whispering praises into your skin, you let yourself bask in the gentleness of the moment…

Because you were a smart girl and smart girls learn their lessons quickly...

#bnha #bnha smut #yandere tamaki #tamaki amajiki x reader #tamaki x y/n #tamaki amajiki #tw:dubcon #tw: noncon #tw: injury #tw: toxic relationship #tw: dark themes

1K notes · View notes

sour--disposition · 4 years ago

Text

Take Me By The Hand

harry lewis x fem!reader

requested: Heyy, could you do the ‘take my hand’ concept that you did with JJ, but with Harry?? Love your writing sm! Xxx

please see my pinned post for masterlist and request info!

One taking the others hand to help them up

You were 4 when you first met Harry properly. You’d been running around the playground, chasing after one of your friends when you’d taken a tumble and ended up in a small heap on the floor. Harry had come trotting over, sticking out a hand to help you up.

“Is your knee okay?”, he asked you.

“I don’t think so. It’s bleeding”, you told him sadly.

Harry kept hold of your hand, dragging you over to where the teachers on duty were standing. “She hurt her knee”, Harry said bluntly, poking one of the adults and then pointing to your knee.

Harry followed you and the teacher inside, sitting next to you as you had your knee cleaned and a plaster stuck on. The teacher left to fill in the accident book and write a note for you to take home. “I’m Harry”, the boy said as soon as she’d left.

“I’m Y/N”, you told him with a bright grin.

“Shall we be best friends?”, Harry asked with a toothy smile.

“Yes!”.

Holding hands whilst one walks on a small wall

You and Harry had stayed best friends from that day forward. There wasn’t anything that you didn’t do together. Harry would always be the first person you’d turn to whenever anything was wrong. He held your hand through every trip you took to the first aid room in your primary school and he shouldered his way through to sit next to you whenever you were in a classroom together.

Harry asked you out on your first date when you were both 15. You’d gone to his house after school, pestering him until he did his homework before you let him outside. He’d been pacing around the lawn in front of you, completely distracted from his kickaround with Josh, as you sat on the deck with Rosie.

“What’s wrong with him?”, she asked from beside you.

“I have no idea”, you told her. “You know what he’s like though”, you dismissed, all the while worrying about your best friend.

Rosie and Josh ran inside 20 minutes later to help set the table for dinner, leaving you and Harry alone in the back garden. “Are you gonna tell me what’s up with you?”, you asked him.

“Do you wanna go on a date?”, Harry blurted, leaving you stunned. The two of you were wide-eyed in surprise, both with words caught in your throat that you were desperately trying to say.

“Yeah”, you smiled.

A week later you met Harry by the beach. You’d seen each other through the week during school and spending the evenings after school together, but this evening felt different. This evening would be the one that potentially changed yours and Harry’s relationship forever.

You walked side by side down to the sea front, stopping and sitting on a small wall there. The two of you talked for hours, like you always did. Harry telling you about his family, about what happened in the few classes that you didn’t share together, telling you about his day and you returning the favour. You laughed well into the sunset, a soft silence falling over you as you watched the sun dip beneath the Guernsey horizon.

“It’s getting dark, and it’s cold. Let’s head back”, Harry suggested. As soon as you’d stood up, you stepped up onto the wall you’d just been sitting on, making you ever so slightly taller than Harry. With your arms held out for balance, you took a few tentative steps.

Harry reached out, grabbing your hand to keep you steady. You looked over to him, a shy smile on his face that you soon mirrored, paired with a rosy blush. Harry kept your hands entwined as you walked along the wall, matching his pace with yours so he didn’t rush you and cause you to stumble.

When you reached the end of the wall and jumped down, your hand didn’t leave Harry’s.

Holding hands whilst driving

Harry had never let whatever Youtube success he was gaining get in the way of the two of you. He always made time for you, always made you feel important. As soon as he’d learnt to drive and got a car, you and Harry would spend hours traversing the coastline, wind pouring into the window and billowing through your hair as you watched the cliffs and waves pass you by.

If you were in his car, Harry would insist on you being in the passenger seat, no matter who else was joining you. His hand would always rest on your thigh as he drove, only ever moving to change gear before quickly returning to its place.

Your fingers were wrapped loosely in his, making sure he was able to let go and reach for the gear stick whenever he needed to. The roads along the coastline were fairly straight, only ever bending slightly and no sharp turns in sight.

With the road empty bar from the two of you, Harry snuck a glance over to you. Your face was illuminated by the soft glow of the sun, hair windswept against the headrest and over your shoulders.

“I love you”, Harry said simply. It was no massive declaration, it didn’t have to be. You and Harry had been friends for 13 years, together for nearly 2. He’d loved you for as long as he could remember.

“I love you, too”.

Possessive hand holding

The first time you visited Harry in London was quite the nerve wracking experience. Aside from helping him move his stuff into his flat with Lux and Freezy, you’d barely seen him since he’d left the small island you both called home.

You waited by baggage claim, leg shaking with restless, nervous energy. It was just your luck that your suitcase was one of the last to make its way through and round the conveyor belt, the hall almost empty by the time you’d got your belongings.

Harry was waiting for you just outside arrivals, just as restless and nervous as you were. His eyes had been glued to the door from the minute you’d text him to let you know you’d reached baggage claim. Every person that walked out of the sliding doors that wasn’t you irritated him even further. It had only been a few weeks since he’d last seen you, and he was going mad.

At last, you trudged through the doors, looking a little worse for wear and incredibly pissed off. But you were there.

Harry wrapped his arms around you, holding you tight against his chest. “I’ve missed you so much”, he whispered into your hair. “The guys are already at my place, I hope that’s alright”, he told you. “They’re really excited to meet you”.

At Harry’s apartment building, he kept a tight hold on your hand as he led you upstairs. “Harry, it’s okay”, you assured him, squeezing his hand.

“Just nervous”, he told you.

Harry led you into the apartment, pausing for a second so you could drop your case by the door and kick your shoes off. His deathly tight grip on your hand never waned, like he was scared you were going to escape.

“Lads, Y/N”, Harry said awkwardly as he led you through the doorway. “Y/N, both of the Cals, Ethan, JJ, Simon, Josh, Tobi and Vik”, he introduced, pointing to each man in turn as he said their names.

“Nice to meet you”, you smiled happily.

You sat next to Harry on the sofa, squeezed up against his side. His hand was still gripping onto yours, squeezing tighter whenever any of the guys started to talk to you. “Harry”, you whispered, wiggling your fingers in his grip. “What’s wrong?”.

“Someone looks a little jealous if you ask me”, Freezy poked, wicked grin shooting across the living room.

“Oh, give over”, you scoffed, flicking Harry in the chest. “You buffoon. There’s nothing to worry about. Now ease up, you’re cutting off blood flow to my fingers”, you teased.

Rubbing their thumb over the other’s hand

“I don’t wanna leave”, you sighed, leaning further into Harry’s chest. “I miss you too much”, you whispered.

“I miss you, too”, he told you, wrapping both arms around your body and pulling you closer.

Harry watched over your shoulder as you opened your phone and pulled up flight times for a few weeks time, scrolling through them to find the cheapest option. Seeing Harry as often as possible was taking its toll on your finances and Harry knew you’d only accept so much help from him.

“What if this was the last time you flew home?”, Harry asked into your hair.

“What do you mean?”, you asked, thumb pausing over the screen.

“I spoke to Cal about it the other day, before you came”, Harry started. “How would you feel about moving to London?”, he asked.

You turned in his arms, facing Harry. “Are you being serious?”, you asked, a blossoming grin eager to bloom over your face.

“As I’ve ever been”, he whispered.

3 weeks later, you waited at the gate in Guernsey airport, surrounded by your family. “I’m so happy for you”, your mum whispered as she pulled you in for a tight hug. When she pulled back, you were both laughing through the tears that had begun to shed. “You and Harry deserve to be happy”, she told you.

They watched and waved as you walked towards the flight bridge, knowing that this would be the last time they’d see you for a while. You sat in your seat, watching as Guernsey got smaller and smaller below you. Although leaving home was never going to be an easy thing, you knew that you could build a home wherever Harry was.

You’d already shipped a lot of your stuff over to Harry, leaving you only to bring a large suitcase with you on your flight. You had no idea what to expect when you arrived, whether your stuff would be in Harry’s room or boxes strewn into whatever corner of the apartment they could fit into.

“Here”, Harry said as you sat in the car in the car park outside of the apartment building. He handed you a key on a keyring. “House keys”, he told you.

“Thank you”, you smiled

Harry pulled your case behind you as you walked up to the apartment. You stilled in front of the door, Harry pulling to a stop next to you. “Are you okay?”, Harry asked, voice filled with concern.

“Yeah”, you assured him quietly. “It’s just a lot, y’know”, you murmured.

“I know”. Harry’s thumb skimmed across the back of your hand in a soft, repetitive, soothing pattern. “I love you”, he reminded you, thumb never halting its soft reassurance against your skin.

“I know”, you smiled up at him. “But I love you more”.

Unconsciously searching for the other’s hand whilst asleep

If you were to ask Harry when he knew you’d be in his life forever, he’d have told you when the two of you were 5. Teasing from the other kids about you being best friends with each other was almost never-ending, but you and Harry always found a way to make light of it.

It wasn’t uncommon to see you and Harry playing with the dolls amongst the other little girls or racing around through the mud with the other boys. Everyone quickly learnt that where Harry went, you went and where you went, Harry went.

Harry knew you were going to be his bestest friend forever when he’d sat down on the grass to play and realised that there were no toys left. You’d come and sat down next to him and you’d played in the mud together, making daisy chains and mud pies and potions that you stirred with sticks, never caring about the dirt coating your pretty pinafore dress.

If you were to ask Harry when he knew that your relationship was meant to last, he would fumble and stumble over his words, not really knowing what to say. It was something that brought his friends great joy, asking what he saw in the future for the two of you. After all, you had been together since you were 15.

The night Harry realised you were his one great love was rather anti-climatic. There was no fireworks or mind-blowing kiss or Earth shattering sex. In fact, you were curled up asleep next to Harry, hair piled on top of your head and the hem of one of his Sidemen Clothing shirts riding up on your thigh.

He’d shut his computer down and gotten ready for bed, sliding in next to you as quietly as possible. Whilst he was lounging in bed next to you, attention focused on the screen of his phone, you’d started shifting beside him. Harry laid stock still, not wanting to wake you up with any movements.

Instead, you reached a hand across the bed, seemingly searching for something. When you couldn’t find whatever it was you were looking for, a frown settled itself onto your face. Harry was sure you were dreaming, but couldn’t resist closing the gap between your fingers and his.

The minute Harry hooked his fingers around yours, the frown on your face disappeared, replaced by a soft, blissful smile. Harry had known you long enough and knew you well enough to know that you were still fast asleep, the gentle sighs falling from your mouth being a dead giveaway.

So, if you asked Harry when he knew that your love was meant to last, he’d tell anyone that listened that it was the moment he realised you loved him even in your dreams.

951 notes · View notes