#guys i fear my next post will also not be about beomgyu arghh
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blueberrybeomgyu · 2 months ago
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୨⎯ "holding out" ⎯୧ (mjh)
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+*:🍰:*﹤descrip. : jh just wants to do better for you :( or response to this ask!!!!
+*:❤️:*﹤content : sub!jaehyun bc who would i be if this wasn't sub!jaehyun x fem!reader
+*:🍓:*﹤warnings : reader is kinda dominant but i never know if it's enough for me to tag, smut, 18+ mdni, edging AGAIN, masturbation, kinda exhibitionism/voyeurism again 🤭, nipple touching, petnames sweetheart/sweetie/good boy/baby boy, female anatomy for reader, mentions of piv sex, endurance training methinks...mehopes
+*:🩷:*﹤word count : 3.2K
+*:🍰:*﹤masterlist
✧・゚: *
Jaehyun’s been acting weird, and that’s saying something, because he’s always been a bit strange. 
But it’s obvious he hasn’t been his usual self for the past week. When you ask him about it, he brushes it off quickly and changes the subject. 
Then, whatever’s bothering him begins affecting your sex life. He's tense, visibly nervous before you guys do anything intimate. You can tell he's close when his high-pitched moans turn into quiet, choked off gasps. You know the signs, and you’re more than ready to feel his hot seed fill you up the way you like, but it never does. You see his face scrunch up in torment right before he hides in your neck. He continues to let out a string of pitiful whimpers, hips still thrusting sloppily until you're showing signs of orgasming yourself. This goes on for days before you notice a pattern. 
You guys get intimate, and for a little while afterward, he gets quieter, more reserved, almost…ashamed? He can’t even seem to look at you, and is quick to scoot away when you sit too close to him. It kind of hurts, but you give him time and space, figuring he’ll come to you if  he’s ever ready to talk. He never brings it up, but after a couple of hours, he’s back to the Jaehyun you know–a bit strange, proposing unusual schemes and so hyper he’s basically bouncing off the walls.
The two of you often fall into intimate moments after bantering, sometimes even play fighting, and tonight’s no different. Jaehyun’s his usual mischievous self, teasing you enough that it’s harmless, but gets under your skin. When tension arises and things get heated, you guys make eye contact, and he kind of just…deflates, moving from where he’s hovering over you to slump back against the couch.
You hesitate, because you don’t want to put him on the spot, but his behavior is beginning to make you concerned, and a little insecure. After a few moments, it’s obvious Jaehyun’s not going to say anything, so you speak up.
"Sweetie, we should talk." 
Immediately, he tenses. He sits up, and his shoulders are so stiff it looks uncomfortable. His only noticeable movement is the fiddling with his fingers, wringing them as if he wants to crack his knuckles, but they’re not popping. You keep a safe distance between the two of you, but sit close enough that you can rest a comforting hand on his thigh.
His eyes are glossy, and his lip is caught in between his teeth when he finally looks at you. He looks like a kicked puppy, and you immediately want to scoop him in your arms and make him feel better. But, time and space.
"Oh, baby. Will you tell me what's bothering you?" 
His lips move, but almost no sound comes out. His cheeks visibly redden when you ask him to repeat himself.
"Do you think I...finish too fast?" He asks, mumbling 'finish' shyly like it's dirty. You stare at him in confusion, rolling his words around in your head, trying to get them to make sense. Since when is him cumming quickly an issue?
"Sorry, was that too abrupt? Just forget I-"
"No, you're fine, Jae. I was just a little surprised." You look away from him for a moment to think about your next words carefully. "There's nothing wrong with being sensitive."
Again, Jaehyun deflates back into the couch, hands coming to hide his face.
“That’s probably the worst thing you could've said. Seriously, ‘yes’ would’ve been less embarrassing.” He says, his words muffled by his palms.
“I’m sorry, I just mean–” You pause. “Even if you finish quickly, what’s wrong with that?”
“Well, doesn’t it leave you…unsatisfied?” This time, he whispers ‘unsatisfied’ cautiously, and pre-winces like he’s waiting for the scariest answer possible.
Almost immediately, you laugh, which sounds more like an amused scoff. Just the thought of Jaehyun leaving you high and dry is a bit silly–he’s a wonderful partner. Even if he finishes quickly, he’s damn near always hard, and rarely fails to make you cum.
But, unfortunately, you don’t say that, so your laughter is your only response. Jaehyun looks at you with his jaw hanging down and his eyes wide like he’s mortified.
“Fuck, I shouldn’t have said anything.” He half-whines, running his hands through his hair in distress. Instinctively, your hands come up to fix the mess, taming wild strands back into place so he looks less like a wet cat. 
“No– Sorry, I’m sorry. I’m not laughing at you, it’s just.” You stammer your words out, trying to clean up the way you’re royally fucking this up. “Jaehyun, you’ve never left me unsatisfied. You don’t even have to worry about that, okay?” You grab one of his hands and squeeze it lightly, trying to punctuate your statement. He doesn’t look entirely convinced, but he doesn’t push back, and instead reciprocates the hand-holding.
“But still, it kinda makes me feel bad. Humiliated, I guess? We barely get started and I feel like I’m already creaming my pants.”
The statement almost makes you giggle again, but you hold it back because that’s not at all helpful. Personally, you love Jaehyun's sensitivity, the way he gets tender and desperate from a hand tracing his thigh, the way he's on the precipice after a little petting. It's cute, he's cute, but you don't know how to tell him this in a way that will stick, so you change courses.
“Okay, this is a serious issue. What do you want to do about it?”
He looks at you bashfully, lips parted like he has something to say but isn’t sure how. Interesting, he’s thought about this before.
“Come on, Myungjae. It’s just me. There’s no need to feel shy.” You shimmy your shoulders a little, drawing his attention to where your boobs are sitting braless in your shirt, and they jiggle the tiniest amount. It’s not a shallow movement–Jaehyun’s easy to rile up, and you can tell he’s already tenting in his shorts. If he’s aroused, he’ll be much more comfortable talking about this, you hope.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:
“Okay, what’s this called, again?” You ask just to be sure, getting comfortable laying near Jaehyun’s chest. You two decided to do this in the bedroom, where Jaehyun might be most comfortable, since this is new territory. He’s slumped against the pillows and headboard, looking down at you with a look of uncertainty and a bead of sweat already forming on his temple. 
“Endurance training.” He says shakily, voice trembling around the words. “I’m gonna do something similar to edging myself, and hopefully with time, I’ll be able to last longer– or maybe I’ll have better stamina, or something.” His uncertainty makes you a bit nervous. It’s not like you two haven’t explored edging before, but you typically do it to each other, not watch one another do it to themselves. 
“And you’re positive you wanna do this?” You cup his cheeks, forcing him to maintain eye contact with you. He hesitates for a second, then there's a sense of determination in his eyes. They’re dark and determined when they meet your own. 
“I want to do this.” He says resolutely, nodding his head as much as he can in your grip. You release his face to let him get comfortable, and he has you set a five minute timer on your phone. Your job is fairly simple–tell him to stop when five minutes are up until (hopefully) he’s done it for twenty minutes. 
“Okay, but why can’t I do it for you?” You ask, trying to push away the urge to pout. You love feeling him tremble under your own hands, watching him fall apart from your touch.
“It’s better if I do it myself today. I t-think I might nut immediately if you touch me.” You’re a little disappointed, but you’re also intrigued about watching him touch himself, and this is important to him, so you want to be supportive. Besides, he didn’t say you can’t spur him on.
Jaehyun shimmies his shorts off and throws them somewhere on the floor, and you’re immediately distracted by the sight of his dick. It’s so cute and plump, and you stave off the need to put your mouth on it. You exchange “readies,” and Jaehyun wraps a hand around his member. You watch as he jerks at the feeling. He takes a deep breath, and when he nods, you start the timer. 
He’s just building up a steady rhythm when the timer reads 10 seconds, after successfully overcoming his shyness and giving into the pleasure when he sees that you’re not judging him.
And boy, are you not judging him. 
Looking at Jaehyun from across a crowded room is usually enough to get you hot at your core, but this need was something new entirely. You watch the way his head mushrooms on upward strokes, and almost feel dizzy at the sight of him running his thumb across the tip expertly. Of course Jaehyun knows how to work his own body, but damn. It’s so effortless you almost feel like you're interrupting. 
He doesn’t notice the way you rub your thighs together to keep the feeling of insanity at bay. He’s too lost in his own pleasure, eyes squeezed shut as he spreads his precum down his penis, and you might actually be drooling.
He’s shaking like a leaf by the time ten minutes pass, huffing a frustrated breath and laying his head back against the pillows. He moans softly when you place a quick kiss on his neck. 
“What’s the matter, Hyunie?” You say with a mischievous smile. He’s taking a small break from touching himself, so you rub little circles into his hip bones.
“God, I–” He stops to swallow, mouth dry from gasping and moaning. “Dunno how m-much longer I c-can do this.”
“But you’re halfway there, baby boy. You can do it.” You encourage, running a hand through his ruffled hair. He doesn’t share that belief, it’s obvious in his eyes, but he wraps his hand around his member again. 
“There you go.” You commend. He doesn’t say anything about you touching him, so you keep doing it, bringing a hand up to lightly squeeze his pec. “Is this okay?” 
He nods a little, whimpers a little in what you assume is permission, because he whines petulantly when you pull your hand away. 
After a few minutes, he’s breathing hard, and bucking his hips to meet his hand halfway. The timer reads 1 minute and 03 seconds left.
“Fuck, I-I can–, can’t-” He babbles incoherently, thighs shaking where they lift in the air and fall back on the mattress rhythmically. He throws his head back again, neck on full display for you to make use of. You take the bait, latching onto his skin and sucking red, angry marks into it. You pull away to read the timer again, 21 seconds left. When you suck another mark into his neck, Jaehyun gasps out.
“Y/N, Y/N, please, -m s’close– ah-h–” While you’re admiring his fucked-out state, your phone beeps next to you. You turn it off and look back at Jaehyun. You’re surprised to see that he’s already looking at you, eyes big and glossy as he humps his hand. 
“Time’s up, Jae.” You say. He whines.
“Jaehyun, stop.” He makes a little sound that you’re not sure what to call, something high-pitched and desperate as his hips stutter.
“Hyunie, do I have permission to touch you?” He nods quickly, desperately, likely under the impression that you’re gonna help him cum. The distressed whine he lets out when you pull his hand away from his cock is visceral, like he doesn’t have control over making it. 
He gasps for air greedily as he teeters from the edge. One of his hands clenches the duvet underneath him, and the other clasps your thigh instead, grip unforgiving. You’re so turned on you don’t even notice the pain, occupied by taking in his flushed face and messy hair. You connect your lips with his in what was meant to be a quick kiss, but he deepens it, the hand on the comforter coming to cup your cheek instead.
“Almost lost yourself for a second there, huh?” You tease after pulling away, whispering in the small space between you guys’ parted lips.
“Thi s-is s-so hard.” He mumbles, words trailing off into a whine, sloppy and slurring together. 
“But it’s been fifteen minutes, sweetheart. Just five more and you can cum.” 
Jaehyun squeezes his eyes shut in displeasure as he comprehends your words, and part of you wants to give in and let him have it. You know how badly he wants to succeed, and he’s already worked so hard. This was his idea, anyway.
But the other, seemingly sadistic part of you wants to watch as he pushes himself to agonizing pleasure. Desperate Jaehyun is one of your favorite sights–the way cute little tears roll down his cheeks and his body basically vibrates with a need only you can fulfill. It’s beautiful, to say the least, and the power goes straight to your cunt, getting you all hot and needy yourself. You clench around nothing at the mere thought of it, so you press “Start” on the timer again and help wrap Jaehyun’s hand back around his dick.
For a minute, Jaehyun doesn’t say anything. His eyes roll back at the stimulation, and he fucks up into his hand dumbly. Then, you lick a fat stripe up his nipple. 
"S-shit, fuck, n-needa cum- hahh, please, it hurts-" He whines in your hold, unoccupied hand trembling where it’s still laying on your thigh.
"Aw, don't you wanna last, sweet thing? You’re so close." 
"I-I- hn- don't w-wanna d-do this anym-more.” He stutters out, struggling to string the sentence together through the fog in his head and the pleasure coursing through his lower body. You halt the stimulation on his nipple at his words.
"What's your color, Hyunie?"
"G-green, green, fuck, I just wanna cum." He says immediately, tears building up in his lash line and finally rolling down his cheeks. His hand wavers, then picks up speed again. 
You pretend to contemplate while trailing a finger along his shaft and pulling away when he chases the feeling. "You want me to give you permission? Tell you to reach that overwhelming pleasure, make a mess all over yourself?" 
Jaehyun nods, of course, but you’re not even sure he’s comprehending what you’re saying right now. His eyes are almost fully black with the way they’re dilated, and you’d be worried if you hadn’t just confirmed his color.
"But I don't think you deserve it, sweetheart.” You lie. Of course he deserves it, but he’s so fun to play with. “It hasn't even been twenty minutes and you're already falling apart. Maybe I should get a ring for your little cock, watch as you desperately work yourself through dry orgasms." His hips stutter at your degrading words, hand aggressive as it strokes his poor, throbbing dick. The need to have it in your cunt has never been as strong as it is now.
"N-noplea- f-fuck, I’ms'rry-" 
Over Jaehyun's slurred babbles, you almost don’t hear the timer go off. At the realization that it's been twenty minutes, you smile proudly and turn the alarm off. 
You shh Jaehyun's whimpers and hiccups and bite another mark on his pec. You replace his hand with yours and thumb at his tip, then watch as he falls apart for you.
"Hng- gonna cum- cumming, pleas-"
"You're so good, Hyunie. You did it. Cum for me." Jaehyun looks at you almost in disbelief before his head falls back against the pillows and he's cumming so hard some of it lands on your shirt.
"You did it, Myungjae. Did such a good job for me." You congratulate again while peppering kisses on his face.
"Did it." He mumbles breathlessly with a lopsided smile and droopy eyes.
"Mhm, you deserve a reward, don't you think?"
"Uh-h." He mutters, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He looks so tired, but you’ve been with him long enough to know he could give you two more orgasms at least. You lift up to straddle his legs and rub up and down his thighs gently. 
"I don't mind your sensitivity, Hyunie. Can I show you why?" He nods silently again, eyes glossy and dazed. He’s breathing harshly through his nose, but looks like he’s in overall good shape, so you take his dick in your hand again and begin slowly pumping it.
"U-unh- too m-much-" He whimpers out, brows furrowed in euphoric torture. His hips twitch like he doesn't know if he should buck into the feeling or pull away from it. Despite his moans in protest, he’s already filling up in your hand, ready to be played with again.
"See how you're already hard again, Jae? All for me?" His mouth hangs open, but no words come out. Instead, he grunts loudly when your pace increases. 
"I just wanna make you feel good." You squeeze his member lightly then tease at the slit. His head falls back again, and his back arches slightly, but he's still staring at you, eyes full of wonder and hanging onto every word you say.
"It doesn't matter if you cum quickly, ‘cause you can just do it again for me, isn't that right?" You twist your wrist just right, and he's shuddering through another orgasm, a pained, high-pitched whine coming from the back of his throat.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:
"T-thank you." he mutters, eyes struggling to stay open, boneless on top of the mattress. His words are still dragging, but they’re much more comprehensible. "-m sorry for making a big deal out of this. It all seems so silly now."
"If it matters to you, it matters to me, sweetheart." You reply, rubbing knots out of his shoulder from where you’re still straddling his legs. You’re still unbearably horny, and you’re pretty sure you’ve soaked through your underwear and your shorts by now.
"Still..." He trails off, eyes following you as you stand up from the bed and strip off your clothing. You see the way he gulps, the way his eyes helplessly flit between your boobs and your cunt, but you don’t say anything–you figure he’s had enough teasing for one day.
You straddle him again with a mischievous smile on your face.
"Let me ride you and I'll let you off the hook?"
✧・゚: *
a/n : i'm actually kind of in love w this story and maybe it’s because i pulled an allnighter to write it and my brain cells aren’t all the way here, if you read this and something doesn’t make sense PLEASE tell me 😭 guys do nawt have me out here looking like a fool </3 i tried to make it different from the taesan one, it was supposed to be a drabble but please don’t ask me how it became literally 3k i DO NOT KNOW….that sleep deprivation boost ig, lastly, i tried to research if there were any discernible differences between edging and endurance training but i couldn’t find anything super helpful so im so sorry if this isn’t a good representation of endurance training </33 berry just a blogger tryin their best
special thanks to @zynz0 and this fic which made me literally insane. while writing this, i couldn't find the phrase for what jaehyun is (maybe) doing here other than self-edging, but that post helped me a lot!!!
now i will FINALLY SLEEEEEP RAHHHH i literally finished this at 9am
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