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fanficsforheartandsoul · 4 years ago

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Enemies | Darth Maul x Fem!Reader | Part I

Note: Maul is a little OOC in this story but I hope this is fine. Since this is the first part there’s a big part who’s basically just explaining and the rest is some action. I hope I brought out the feelings well :)

Also, I implemented one of my headcanons, that the horns of Zabrak grow a little when they’re happy/excited.

And whoops Reader is a Jedi Shadow again. People might have realized by now but I love them. No one can stop me ok.

Fandoms: Star Wars, The Clone Wars

Warnings: Non-Canon Story, Angst, Fighting, Death, Slight OOC, Original Characters

Summary of this series: Y/N mourns for something she can never have but Maul won’t let her.

Word Count: 7′034

Taglist: @princessayveke @pinkiemme

If you want to be tagged in my stories send me a pm with the fandom/character name! Or comment on the fic :)

Masterlist

Part II

_______

They were children when they first met. He was so young. Only four years old. She was young too. Although 2 years older. He was a born nightbrother, but she didn't belong to the nightsisters.

In fact, her presence on Dathomir had been an accident. The ship that should have brought her to Coruscant crashed after they had been hunted by pirates. When she woke up, she was alone. There was no sign of the Jedi who took her from her parents or anyone else of the ship's crew. Only two curious yellow eyes that watched her from a safe distance.

"Who are you?!"

The first thing she wielded in her life wasn't a lightsaber, no, that would come later. It was a pathetic dry stick from a dead tree. Dathomir didn't have much to offer at the crashsite of her ship, unfortunately.

She held the stick with both hands and proceeded to lie her head off:

"I am the princess from Coruscant, and my knights will kill you if you do anything to me! So come out!"

There was a short silence until a timid voice spoke:

"You're really a princess?"

That's when he first stepped before her, and they met eye to eye. He was a midget. A red midget with the roundest eyes she had ever seen and horns, which made him look like the bounty hunter in her hometown. But unlike that old man, he had strange black marks in his face.

"Of course, I am! Do I not look like one?!"

She never forgot his reply. "No, you look like one. You're beautiful!" Even then, he was already able to sweet talk.

His answer satisfied her and the arrogant child she was, she lowered her weapon and let him approach her. He did eventually, but he froze when she suddenly touched his head and small horns.

"Does your brain not hurt?"

It shouldn't have been possible, but the red skin colored boy turned red some more. Having her hands touching his head everywhere caused his cheeks to heat up.

"E-Everyone has these here!"

He grabbed her hands, and both of them paused. E/C met yellow. His innocent eyes showed her reflection and her dirty state.

Suddenly she had to cry. Sir Jedi was probably dead after all. She left her parents behind, and she really missed her home. And her plushie. Mr. Grog might also be gone after the explosion of their spaceship.

Her tears surprised him and made him panic, something that happened even when they met years later. He tugged at her hands, and she got pulled into his arms. But unfortunately, he really was a squirt, and both of them tumbled to the ground.

His breath got taken away by her, laying on top of him, but he didn't mind. She was so different than the nightsisters he had met. Not disgusted of touching him. He fell in love right there and then. Though he would strongly deny it in the future.

"Why are you crying?"

He put his hand on her hair, and the softness stunned him. She really must be a princess. He petted her slowly, something he saw the older nightsisters do to the younger ones. He could feel her tears wetting his clothes, and her loneliness made his heart clench.

"I'm all alone now!"

But she wasn't, He was there. His hands were like magic. Her tears stopped soon after he began to draw things on her back.

"Y-You have me."

"But I don't know you!"

"My name is ... What's yours?"

"Y-Y/N."

And that's how they got to know each other. He had another name back then but he got rid of it. Maul was his new name. The boy took her to the village, told his mother that he found her all alone. He didn't give away that he had seen another person from the shipwreck.

The nightsisters were suspicious first, but when they found out that she was force sensitive like them, they decided to take her in. For two years, she lived on Dathomir and learned the ways of the nightsisters with Maul as her best friend.

"In the future, I will be your soulmate!"

When she had told her that he almost began to cry. Not a reaction you would expect from someone who really, really liked Y/N.

"NEVER! If you give birth to a child, I'll get killed!"

"Then we just never kiss! We can still be soulmates if we don't kiss, right?"

The fact that they didn't really know anything about love made them say weird things.

Maul wasn't too sure, but they made a promise that they would be soulmates in the future and marry. Although Y/N had to explain to Maul what marrying actually meant - obviously through a child’s eyes - since the customs on Dathomir were different to the ones on her home planet.

He never told her that but when she had explained that marrying basically meant always eating together, sleeping in the same bed and holding hands, he had really liked the idea of such a future. Of course, the young girl only knew the things she had seen from the marriage of her parents.

The whole not kissing aspect was eventually broken, though. Obviously not by him, because he was shy and seriously believed that she would get pregnant if he gave her even just a peck on the lips.

But he really liked her. And she really liked him. So much that she understood that her way of liking him was the same as the way some fallen nightsisters had liked their mates. It was love.

And then one day, when Maul came beaten and bruised from his training as a nightbrother and he laid next to her, Y/N leaned over him and gave him a kiss.

It was short, nothing more than a light peck, but when their lips touched, butterflies burst in her chest and it was as if the whole world lit up.

Maul’s yellow eyes widened and the Zabrak pushed her away out of reflex. She looked at him with a shocked expression.

“NO! What are you doing?!”

Panic was laced in his voice and he grabbed her arms with a little too much strength. Y/N winced and her eyes began to water. The giddy feeling disappeared immediately.

“Wha-What?”, she stammered and he shook her.

“I- I’m not ready! My traini- the baby- we have to leave!”

She just sat there, not understanding why he was so startled. She was more intrigued by the fact that his horns seemed to have grown a little. He suddenly grabbed her hand and dragged her on her feet.

“Hu-hurry, Y/N! Before they find out! Let’s talk with my mother, she’ll help us!”

“Find out what?”

“About the baby!”

And then it blanked on her.

“Oh no.”

And then they hurried back to his home, where Y/N, Maul, his two brothers and his mother resided. A long talk followed and the two children eventually went to bed with different thoughts.

The young girl was somewhat disappointed that she couldn’t have another playmate besides Maul and his brothers but she was also relieved because she now knew that kissing Maul would not make her pregnant. That meant she could do it again. The thought made her grin.

Maul on the other hand was embarrassed, mainly because he had almost cried when they ran into his mother and he had yelled at her to “save Y/N and their baby” but also because he really liked the kiss. But he was also slightly annoyed. I wanted to kiss her first.

“Maul?”

He turned his head to see the other side of the room, where Y/N laid in her small bed. He could see her glistening eyes.

“Ye-Yes?”

“I think I love you.”

A blush crept across his cheeks.

“Okay.”

He couldn’t say it out loud but he said it in his head.

Unknown to both of them, Y/N’s words had been heard by his mother.

When they woke up again the next morning some things had changed. There was the giddy atmosphere between the two, while Maul’s mother looked at them with a rather dark expression. The two would soon find out why.

Their closeness was something the nightsisters didn't like because it spoke against their ideas of mates and they decided to separate them. Both cried and cried for days.

Their bond was strong, after all, and they not only had they lived together for two years but they also played together every day. Since Y/N was taken from her family, Maul had become a replacement and they were close. Really close.

But it was no use. They didn't see each other for a month. And when they finally met again, it was the last time in their childhood.

A republic ship had landed on Dathomir. And they were looking for the girl that was supposed to become a Jedi youngling. The person Maul had seen leaving the space ship was the Jedi Master, who took Y/N from her family. The man had survived for two years alone in the swamps and somehow contacted the Jedi Order to save him and the girl.

According to him, the nightsisters captured her and brainwashed her to join the dark side. Which was bullshit. She realized that later. The things she had learned on Dathomir had saved her life on more than one occasion.

But they arrived and forcefully took her back. 5 Jedi came to her apparent rescue, but the peacekeepers of the galaxy ignored her wails and cries when they dragged her to the ship. She screamed Maul's name and found his face in the crowd who was held back by some soldiers. Don't leave me! pleaded his eyes.

But she did. She had no choice. They didn't even ask if she wanted to go with them. When the ramp of the ship closed, she freed herself from the Jedi's grip and bit him. Hard. The man reacted poorly, unlike a Jedi was supposed to.

He pushed her away, and she fell on the floor. Hateful tears streamed down her cheeks, and she channeled her powers to slam the 5 men against the wall. The force was strong in her, and her emotions boosted it, that's why she succeeded. Three of them got pressed to the wall, the other two who where Jedi masters only slid back a bit. Using the force was tiring, and she slumped. The padawans got released.

"Let me go! I want to go back! I want to go home! Maul! Maul!!"

Her voice was shrill and full of desperation, but they didn't react. Ignored her tantrum and whispered something between themselves.

"Her emotions are way too strong! What is Master Yoda thinking? The dark side has already engulfed her!"

Only one of them didn't say anything. The Jedi watched her with a neutral expression, and she returned the eye contact with a piercing gaze.

I hate you!

As if he had read her thoughts, he snorted and turned to face the others.

"I believe Master Yoda knows what to do with her."

And the Jedi grandmaster did.

He turned her into a Jedi. Made her a youngling, later a padawan - although not his - and then when the High Council thought she was ready, they knighted her.

Over the course of many years, the small girl learned about her special abilities, about the force, about the Jedi, the Dark Side of the force, the responsibility they had to shoulder, and why attachments were forbidden.

Although she had questioned the principles secretly, she never voiced any hesitation or critical questions. When she got separated from Maul she had racked her brains to find out why, although she only realized why when the nightsisters ordered her to read the stories about the Fallen sisters again. After that lesson, she knew well enough when something wasn’t supposed to be said. So she left her doubts unsaid.

When she had arrived at the temple she was unbelievably sad and her heart was hurting. When the Jedi took her from her family, she didn’t really realize what that meant. But being taken from Dathomir after she was a little older and formed such a close bond with Maul, she understood that they had parted and would probably never meet again.

This left her devastated and it took half a year for her to adapt.

Her sadness and arrogant side vanished with time, but her determined character trait stayed and it made her into an extraordinary Jedi.

Y/N was powerful, the secret pride of the grandmaster. Her patience and knowledge were as vast and deep as the seas of Kamino. Her lightsaber skills were unmatched by many of her fellow padawans, and she could even stand her ground against some of the Jedi knights.

Her Master, the guy who had ignored her tantrum, was impressed by her natural affinity for the force. And so he had asked Master Yoda if he could take her as his padawan.

The grandmaster was hesitant at first. Because the man wasn't a Jedi Knight. He was a sentinel, a shadow, to be exact. A path that would undoubtedly be difficult for Y/N, especially since she was found on Dathomir. But he accepted, and she became the padawan of a renowned Jedi Shadow. Yoda was proud, but deep down, also worried. Although he didn't tell her that.

Every youngling had heard about Y/N. Before the rumors of a Chosen One started, there were many about a Prodigy. Her name was whispered during classes, and there were bets and dares in the circles of the younger generations.

"I dare you to confess your love to Y/N L/N!"

"But I don't even like her! Attachment is forbidden, Mia!"

"It's just a game, and we all wanna see if her face will blush! Come on."

But there was one flaw about the prodigy.

One thing that she could not erase. The padawan Y/N L/N ached for something. Someone. And her yearning - she wasn't the only one who knew it - would be her downfall. But she tried to hide it, built walls around that part of her heart and succeeded- until that one day.

[16:00, 32 BBY, Coruscant, Jedi Temple]

"...my only conclusion can be that it was a Sith Lord."

The air in the chamber changed immediately. Qui Gon Jinn, the Jedi reporting the things that happened on Tatooine, held his head up high, his expression was neutral, but the weight of his words was visible in his eyes.

Master Ki turned his head to face Master Yoda and said with a disbelieving undertone:

"Impossible! The Sith have been extinct for a millennium."

"I do not believe they could have returned without us knowing," added Master Windu, and Jinn's padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi furrowed his brows.

Yoda hummed in response, he sighed and then stated:

"Hard to see, the dark side is. Discover who this assassin is, we must."

The other council members nodded, their faces were grim.

"I sense he will reveal himself again," meant Master Ki.

Master Yaddle, who had listened to Jinn's report, silently began to speak up, and when she did, everyone turned. The Jedi all tensed when they heard her words:

"For that, a shadow we should send. Someone in mind, I have. Of help, Leon Ra'eli and his padawan Y/N L/N could be."

The people in the room all had different reactions to the names that were mentioned. Plo Koon and Qui Gon Jinn raised a brow, the padawan of the latter blinked surprised, and Ki-Adi-Mundi, Mace Windu, and Yoda showed a worried expression.

"We must discuss this with the Council of First Knowledge, Master Yaddle," remarked Saesee Tiin and shared a look with the Jedi grandmaster. Yoda nodded slightly.

"I believe Leon would certainly be of help."

Obi-Wan turned to his Master. His eyes clearly asking why the Jedi would speak this freely in front of the council just for another Jedi. He was aware that he was acquainted with the Jedi shadow but the padawan was confused anyway.

Qui Gon hid his hands in his sleeves and bowed slightly when Master Windu frowned at him. Although he was looked at with intimidating stares, he didn't back down and continued:

"I heard he has been training an extraordinary padawan. Both of them would be a great aid if another attack like the one on Tatooine would happen."

Obi-Wan smiled a little, when his Master talked about Y/N. He knew her from his youngling days. And according to the rumors going around, she had truly turned into an exceptional padawan, a proud feeling spread in his chest.

The dark-skinned Jedi Master huffed and then leaned back in his seat.

"This attack on Tatooine was with purpose, that is clear, and I agree the Queen is the target. If a Jedi Shadow and Qui Gon Jinn would remain at her side..."

Yoda nodded slowly.

"With this Naboo queen, you must stay, Qui-Gon. Protect her."

The Jedi bowed.

"Yes, Master."

And that was the beginning of Y/N's doom. That goddamn mission. Something entirely different for the Jedi Shadow in training.

Until now, she had to research old Sith artifacts, go on missions to find lost holocrons, and look for secret Dark Side places with her Master. But that was it. Of course, there was always a certain degree of danger coming with those missions but it was nothing truly worrying, the Dark Side she encountered left her uninterested and funnily she wasn’t scared.

She spent two years on Dathomir, a planet which - according to the Jedi archives - was a space for evil powers. The feeling from those places was familiar and to a certain degree even calming but she didn’t tell her master.

In other words, she never actually came in contact with a Dark Side user much less a Sith. But now she and Leon were assigned to investigate an assassin who could possibly be a Sith, a Sith lord, to be exact.

The tightness in her chest was definitely from her nervousness, but there was also something else to it. She wasn’t scared, the feeling was more like curiosity but Y/N also had a bad premonition about the upcoming task. But she kept her concerns to herself. Like always.

It was night when they left the Jedi temple. Both wore long black robes, and their faces were hidden under their hoods. Master Ra'eli had told her that although they were escorting Queen Amidala, they would not focus on keeping her safe. Both the High Council and the Council of First Knowledge agreed on the priority to catch the potential Sith. Protecting the queen laid in the hands of the two other Jedi.

When Y/N first heard that they would accompany to Jedi knights, Master Qui Gon Jinn and his padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, she was relieved.

She and Obi-Wan were friends when she was a youngling. He was only one year older than her, and although they chose entirely different paths, they parted with good and happy memories.

Obi-Wan had been a pillar in Y/N's life when she had to learn how to accept that she would probably never meet Maul and her parents again. He dried her tears, let her meditate with him and calmed her down when she had a nightmare.

Although they hadn't seen each other in a few years, the padawan believed that they would click again, and everything would be like in their youngling years.

But when she and her Master arrived at the Senate landing platform and everyone was already there, and Leon greeted his fellow Jedi, something happened.

As soon as Y/N laid eyes on Obi-Wan's Master, a sudden pain bolted through her head, and she staggered.

Her hand shot to her forehead, and the padawan grabbed her Master's robe for support. He turned alarmed and watched her with concerned brown eyes when she winced in pain.

A vision flashed before her eyes: black robes, a red and green lightsaber clashing, yellow eyes, and a screaming Obi-Wan.

What...?

"Y/N?"

Her Master's voice took her back to her senses. She looked up to see his and Master Jinn's worried faces. Obi-Wan looked just as disturbed as them.

"I-I think I just had a vision," she whispered weakly and let go of Leon's sleeves.

However, she hadn't regained her balance yet, her legs faltered, and if her Master hadn't grabbed her arm in time, she would have tumbled to the ground.

"A vision?", asked Obi-Wan and the young man shared a look with Qui Gon.

"What did you see, padawan?" he asked, and all three of the Jedi watched her expectantly. She gulped. The feeling in her chest from before became stronger. The eyes in her vision seemed faintly familiar.

"I..." she began hesitantly, "There will be a fight. I think the assassin will show up again. And..." She turned to her Master, her expression grim, "I'm certain he's a Sith. I could feel the wrath and hatred Master. Stronger than in any artifact we ever found."

This revelation was shocking, but only the queen's followers all visibly paled. The three Jedi showed dark expressions. Her Master helped Y/N back on her feet, and she bit her lip.

He looked at her, and she could read in his eyes that the situation was dire.

Trust in your abilities and the force.

Words from her training lessons with Leon resounded in her mind, and she straightened her back. Although she was intimidated now, she would not falter. A Jedi Shadow’s mission was to extinguish the evil that Sith brought into this world. She could not hesitate.

"We will make sure that that Sith will not harm anyone," declared her Master, and the queen nodded. His words seemed to calm her entourage, but Y/N smiled bitterly. If her vision would come true...

No, let’s not worry.

They finally began to board the ship, she gave her Master a tap on the shoulder, and he slightly turned his head. She only formed one word with her lips, but he understood. She had more to tell, but only to him.

While the two other Jedi discussed some political matter with the queen, Leon and Y/N stayed in a separate room to talk about her vision.

“I sense you have something else to say.”

"Master... I worry that one of us will be hurt."

Her confession was difficult to admit for her, after all it was against the emotional walls she had built, but she had to tell him anyway. It concerned the well being of a Jedi.

She expected her Master to be shocked or at least concerned, but his expression remained neutral, as usual. This fact calmed her a little. In all those years she had known her Master, there was never a moment, where the other didn’t control his emotions.

"Did you see that in your vision?"

She nodded and wrung with her hands. Only in her Master's presence could she let her walls down to a certain degree. The force in the room swirled from her uneasiness.

"I think Master Jinn will get injured..."

Leon breathed in slowly and sat down on one of the cots. His face stayed emotionless, but his eyes betrayed him. For a second deep worry glistened in them, and the way he bit his lip also showed how her words got to him. But it was gone when she blinked. She frowned.

Did I imagine that?

"We must trust in the force."

Y/N expected him to add more, but he stayed silent, looking like he was deep in thought. The force in the room rippled, and she knew that he would meditate for the next few hours.

"You can rest if you want to, Y/N," murmured her Master and slipped to the floor, where he sat cross-legged. She shook her head and sat down too. "Let me join you, Master." He looked at her and smiled slightly.

"Okay."

They both began to meditate, and soon the force around them changed again. The change spread through the whole ship, and the two other Jedi got distracted from their discussions.

Obi-Wan and Qui Gon exchanged a glance, and both thought the same. The Jedi Master voiced their thoughts: "Don't worry, your Majesty. You are in good hands, and with Master Ra'eli and his padawan here, the Sith will not have a chance."

But he was wrong. Horribly wrong.

And then they met.

It was as if the earth stopped spinning.

The corner of her lips lifted, her face displayed many emotions. Worry turned into shock, shock turned into surprise, and surprise turned into joy. Her heart began to beat faster and it was so loud and strong that she believed that it could shake the whole planet.

He had grown up. Some more tattoos got added in his face and he now resembled the look of other nightbrothers who lived on Dathomir, it gave him a domineering appearance and her heart skipped a beat. It was familiar but at the same time, it wasn’t.

His eyes had also changed, the color was slightly different. The beautiful yellow that had reminded Y/N of the sun now held traces of red, and they were burning with a fire that she couldn’t quite place.

But the force seemed to cry out in pain and the luring darkness in his force presence alarmed her. Something was wrong.

Although she recognized him immediately, this was not the boy she had met on Dathomir, this wasn't the friend she had longed for, not the kid she had dreamt about, not the boy who promised to marry her and whom she kissed. This person before her was a Sith, her enemy.

And it broke her heart.

While the queen's guards scattered and left, her grip around her lightsaber faded, and a second later, she dropped it. The impact resounded loudly in her head as if a bomb had detonated. She couldn’t hear anything else. Not the leaving footsteps of the security forces, not her Master calling out her name, nor how the queen asked Qui Gon Jinn how to proceed.

His name rushed over her lips, and he frowned and looked at her.

Then his eyes widened, and the tattoos in his face twisted in realization. He opened his mouth, but no words came out.

His focus moved, and she noticed how her Master had activated his lightsaber beside her.

"You know him, padawan?" asked Master Ra'eli calmly, and she could only nod.

Maul stiffened from their interaction and grabbed his lightsaber. Her Master stepped forward, and suddenly her lightsaber was once again in her hand. She gripped it so hard, her knuckles turned white.

"So, this is him? From 16 years ago? Oh, Y/N."

Leon's words hit her right in the gut. She had confessed how dearly she missed Maul when she became his padawan - although leaving out the part about their promise and kiss - and her Master had reacted as any other Jedi would have.

Attachments are forbidden, padawan. You will forget these feelings soon.

When she first had heard those words, she felt crushed.

Was her connection to Maul really something bad? Somehow she couldn't believe that emotions were able to come without attachments. Weren't Jedi supposed to keep the people of the galaxy safe? Wouldn't her bond with Maul motivate her to make sure he's alright?

And it wasn't like she obsessively loved him, like all those fallen Jedi she had to read about in the archives after she told her Master about her feelings. The Zabrak was her best friend. Nothing more. Or nothing more came out of their friendship. Or that's at least what she had told herself, completely disregarding that they had kissed and she was the one who initiated it. She was in denial.

But now that they finally met again, it turned out that he was the Sith Lord, and her heart was literally being torn apart. In the end, there was no mistake, Y/N did love Maul. But not this version of him in front of her.

The padawan felt torn. The Zabrak before her eyes was her old best friend and they had sworn to be there for each other until the day they died. They had promised to marry. They kissed. She told him she loved him. But on the other hand, he appeared to be the enemy of the principles she had been taught for years. Two years against sixteen. The winner was obvious.

"You... I remember you."

The Zabrak clenched his fists tighter around his lightsaber and activated it. The red blades flared, and they seemed to represent the force around them, which was churning from the Sith's anger.

The padawan didn't know if he was addressing her because he didn't waste another second to look at her. But that was fine because she was sure that another eye contact with him would break down the walls she had built for the last decade. Also, she wasn’t sure if she would do something against the Jedi code if he addressed her directly.

Qui Gon and Obi-Wan seemed to have realized that something was going on between Y/N and the Sith because they sent the queen with the security forces and stayed, ready to assist Leon and his padawan.

It was against their plan but the man before them apparently was dangerous enough for them to change it.

Obi-Wan stepped up to her, his lightsaber activated and he held it up defensively. His hand touched her back, and he whispered:

"Y/N? Get a hold of yourself."

Her head snapped in his direction, and he gave her a reassuring smile, although he appeared nervous.

"Jedi!", snarled Maul and his eyes burned with rage when he dropped his robe and then suddenly leaped forward to attack.

Y/N's heart skipped a beat and she flinched. She couldn't tell if it was because he seemed to run towards her or because his overbearing aura intimidated her, but it didn't matter because the Zabrak couldn’t reach her.

Her Master stepped before her, and his yellow dual lightsaber skillfully parried Maul's attack.

"You are outnumbered, Sith."

Qui Gon didn't waste a second and also jumped into the fight, their lightsabers clashed, and sparks flew. Obi-Wan gave her a glance and then joined in. The strange look he gave her took Y/N back to her senses, and she activated her own lightsaber.

It was also dual-bladed and yellow, although her hilt was from Orichalc material and wrapped with leather for a better grip. The yellow glow calmed her down to a certain degree, and the familiarity of the blade in her hand cleared her head temporarily.

I need to talk with him! There must be a misunderstanding!

Her eyes focused on the Sith and the three other Jedi who had already gained a certain distance from her. She ran after them and noticed that they passed into the Theed power generator facility.

"Master, wait!"

The fighting Jedi ignored her shout and performed a series of fierce attacks, which all got fended off by Maul. Qui Gon aimed for the Sith's legs, but the Zabrak avoided his lightsaber and somersaulted backward on the bridge.

Y/N's heart pounded loudly in her ears, worry filled her chest, worry for her fellow Jedi and also Maul. In the end, she couldn't ignore her heart.

She used the force to jump forward a considerable distance and now stood next to Obi-Wan. She felt light-headed, partly because of the adrenaline rush from the whole situation but also because she was slightly scared of heights.

"I know him, Master Jinn, stop attacking!" she turned her head to the Sith, calling out his name: "let's talk, please! Do you not remember m-"

Before she could finish, the Zabrak pushed his hands forward, and she was sent flying by the force. Everything she had been taught, all the techniques and rules for a fight. It was as if she had forgotten them when her eyes laid on Maul. The prodigy acted like a youngling and she had to pay the price for it.

Her back hit the wall of the room, and something broke. Black dots flooded her vision, and pain burst through her whole body.

She couldn't hear clearly because her head was ringing, but she believed that someone had shouted her name. Although she couldn't be sure because before she could open her eyes again, she temporarily fell unconscious.

It felt like a long time but was indeed only a minute later, that she woke up. Her thought process was slow when she stirred.

It hurts.

It hurts!!

A groan escaped her lips, and something warm dampened the back of her head.

Is this how you feel in the Trial of the Flesh? If so, then I don't want to become a full Jedi... I can't believe he attacked me, Maker...

Her thoughts were all over the place, dizziness caused her vision to blur, and her mind wandered from the pain to the Jedi Trials, the archives, her time on Dathomir, and to Maul. Her injuries hurt like hell but she was almost crying from the pain in her heart.

What happened to him? How could he... Has he really fallen to the Dark Side?

She tried to move upright and used the force to calm her fluttering nerves.

Focus.

Focus!

The blurriness of her vision vanished, and she finally saw clearly again, right on time for her to catch a glimpse of Obi-Wan running past some laser doors at the other end of the gigantic room.

I must stop them!

Her legs felt like jelly when she tried to stand up, and although her balance was undoubtedly off, she was still able to stand. Not without feeling immense pain, though. Y/N was sure that she had at least three broken ribs.

Let go of the pain.

She remembered her training and breathed in and out slowly. She closed her eyes for a second to concentrate on the force, and she was able to feel the fierce battle that took place at the other end of the bridge. Anxiety welled up again but she ignored it with gritted teeth.

The padawan began to move forward, slowly at first, then she picked up the pace and limped over the bridge towards the laser doors, ignoring the fact that she had lost her lightsaber somewhere.

When she crossed the bridge her legs almost gave out. She had tried not to look down, her fear of heights couldn’t stop her in this crucial moment, but now she felt the adrenaline rush and it almost made her fall over.

It was then when she reached the first laser door when she felt the cry in the force.

A life got critically injured. And guessing from Obi-Wan's scream, it was his Master's.

Y/N stumbled. The pain in the force was breathtaking. Emotions that didn't belong to her filled her chest and grief caused her eyes to prick.

What shocked her, even more, was that her Master seemed to hurt as much as Qui Gon's padawan. The Jedi Shadow had shouted the other man's name when he got impaled, and now through the flaring red doors, she could see Leon swinging his sword wildly to attack Maul and the Zabrak defending himself.

Why...?

The force presence of her Master seemed off, and his erratic movements void from any specific form proved that he lost himself to his emotions.

The fact that the usually composed Leon Ra'eli now fought like that caused her fists to clench.

Why is he acting like that?! This contradicts everything he ever taught me!

This scared her more than the potential death of Qui Gon Jinn.

Obi-Wan seemed to burn with rage too. His shoulders lifted with every breath he took, and she could sense his anger mixed with grief and anguish.

Y/N heaved with all the sudden emotions she had to experience. Her guts twisted when she sensed pleasure, and it took her a second to realize that Maul was the one who was very pleased about the injury of the Jedi Master.

This was the ultimate proof that the Zabrak who fought against Leon wasn't the midget from Dathomir. But before she could spill even one tear over that fact, the laser doors got deactivated, and Obi-Wan jumped forward to attack the Sith.

She began to run, but she wasn't fast enough, her wounds slowed her down. The pain was almost unbearable and the whole situation seemed to test her entire being. The doors activated before her nose, and she staggered.

Right, when she caught her balance again, Obi-Wan slashed Maul's lightsaber in two, and her Master pushed the Sith towards the edge with the force.

The Zabrak was able to catch himself in time and jumped forward, his lightsaber only one blade now. He snarled and swung his weapon at the two Jedi, but they seemed to finally have the high ground and attacked him mercilessly.

Y/N watched with sweaty hands how the Zabrak got pushed into defense, and although she should root for her fellow Jedi, although it was obvious that he wanted to kill them all, although he clearly engulfed the Dark Side, she couldn't stop herself from worrying for Maul.

Please stop fighting! Just stop!

She feared for all of them, which didn't make sense for her head, but her heart ignored all her rational thoughts. It almost leaped out of her chest when Obi-Wan got force pushed into the melting pit, but from the way the other two men acted, he was still alive. Immense relief washed over her and her knees buckled.

Y/N felt dizzy from all the feelings she had to deal with, and the fact that she hit her head and even bled to some extent gave her body one more reason why to falter. She had to hold her head because it felt like a bullet was shot through it.

The pain distracted her from the fight, and when she looked up again, her and Maul's eyes suddenly met.

He looked at her, over Obi-Wan's shoulder, who had suddenly appeared, his face full of shock and... regret?

It took her a second to notice the lack of fighting between the two men. They just stood there, Obi-Wan held the lightsaber of his Master in his hand and his pose looked like he had just taken a large swing.

Was it over? Did they finally calm down and listen?

Y/N opened her mouth to say something when time seemed to slow down, Maul’s lightsaber deactivated, and he slowly fell backward.

His and her eyes found themselves again, and while hers widened in panic, his slightly closed as if the Zabrak was smiling at her. His lips formed something but she was too panicked to focus on it.

Before a scream could erupt from her throat, he was gone.

He was gone.

The laser doors opened again. Obi-Wan didn't waste a second glance and rushed to his Master's side, where her own Master already knelt. He laid Qui Gon's head in his lap.

"Master! Master!"

The pain in Obi-Wan's voice reflected the one the female padawan was feeling. Some words were whispered between the dying Jedi and his student, but Y/N didn't hear any of it.

No, no. No, NO!

She slowly stood up, her legs shaking, and she made her way into the room. Her eyes solely focused on the cooling pit. A wail escaped her lips, and she tried to form his name, although she failed. She couldn’t form a single word. She couldn’t bring herself to look over the edge. Her breath quickened and she panted as if she just ran for her life.

Hey.

Y/N.

You changed. Not so small anymore, huh?

Things happened after you left. And you have no right to say anything, you would barely reach my chin with your height.

A small smile formed on her lips. Her eyes were strangely empty.

Why did you become...?

A Sith? I'm not. This is all a misunderstanding.

Right? I knew it. You would never turn to the Dark Side. You would never.

The padawan sank to her knees at the edge, eyes still trained on the hole before her. Her hands were violently shaking and she gripped her robes with such a force that her knuckles turned white.

...?

Hmmm?

Where did you go?

What do you mean? I'm right here with you.

Of course. There's no way you're...

Y/N turned her head slightly, and a grey object on the ground near the wall caught her eye. With a flick of her wrist, she absently minded caught the severed lightsaber half and traced it with trembling fingers.

There's no way you're dead.

There were a thousand thoughts in her mind right now, but the one that stood out the most was the fact that Obi-Wan had cut Maul in half.

Obi-Wan Kenobi, her friend from the Jedi had killed her best friend from Dathomir.

"Let me carry him, Obi-Wan."

The weak voice of her Master invaded her thoughts, and she slowly turned to the two other Jedi and the corpse.

We Jedi do not kill, Y/N. Only if it’s absolutely necessary. Preserving a life is more important, even if they are tainted by the Dark Side. Sith can be saved too. Darth Revan is proof of that. Never forget this.

Liar.

In the end, 2 years appeared to be stronger than 16.

The killer held his Master's dead body, and the shaking of his shoulders gave his sadness away. She felt nothing for him, neither pity, nor worry. She was completely numb.

There is no death, there is the force, do you not know your own code?

"We must report back to the temple," was all she said. Her voice was unnaturally cold.

Her Master looked at her, his expression was heartbroken, and she had to turn her gaze away. Or else he would have seen her hateful stare.

For the first time in her life, Y/N truly despised the Jedi and their hypocrisy.

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meltlilies · 7 years ago

Text

i’d probably still love you with your hands around my neck.

chapter i: the calm before the storm

percy and vax don’t have a perfect relationship, but they’re working on it.

they swear.

(they’re just very bad about the whole, being in a relationship thing.)

on ao3

perc’ildan, friends with benefits that quickly becomes almost lovers then vax wanting percy’s fucking head to lovers for real after some character death (tm), multichapter. warnings for it being nsfw and it’s gonna get a little dodgy later on, tags will be added accordingly.

also, most importantly, written because it’s all @sneakattxck‘s fucking fault. i hate u bec, but i also love u

Percy and Vax have always had the strangest of relationships in Vox Machina, which is saying something when Grog and Scanlan’s favorite pastime is to go get laid together. Friends one moment, then ready to start a fight the next (well mostly Vax) and back to laughing once more.

But things start getting stranger between them after they arrive back from Vasselheim, before everything goes to hell.

Quietly, Vax had broken off what might have been with Gilmore, finally getting the courage--ironic, for the first person to jump into a fight--to be honest and speak with Keyleth about his feelings for her.

Needless to say, it doesn't go well. She tries to let him down gently, but her gentleness towards nature still has yet to to translate to talking with actual people; he's not mad, really, just a little sad. Mostly for hurting Shaun, but he won't run back and take back what he did. God knows he could do better than a man who does nothing but almost get himself killed whenever there's a serious battle.

More than anything else, he's upset with himself. He rarely opens up like this and he managed to fuck up his relationship with two of his favorite people in the period of a few days. Next, he’ll make his own twin want to shoot an arrow between his eyes.

(But, he knows Vex would never hate him. That much is a comfort.)

Percival Frederickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III rarely gets truly drunk--the best word for what happens is probably, pardon his language, shitfaced--on Vox Machina’s excursions in the various taverns and pubs around Emon or anywhere else they're currently staying.

But tonight is a special occasion. For they’ve just come back from Vasselheim and his heart is in more pieces than before they left; it's petty and stupid to be so childishly heartbroken over seeing Vex with someone that isn't him, but all the same he's upset. He can't blame her for being smitten over their new, dragon slaying friend and comrade as a result of the Slayer’s Take, for Zahra is a lot of woman to handle--she's got a tail for fuck’s sake--and Vex loves nothing more than to have her hands full of everything she can enjoy.

Percy is thankful he has the right mind about him not to say a word about his own crush, and instead remains her closest friend. It's enough.

Yet, all the same, he's delightfully and very drunk as he saunters--even barely able to walk properly, a de Rolo still must have a modicum of grace about him--over to Vax, brooding in the corner.

“Vax’ildan!” Percy practically falls over and knocks the table forward. “Come, join me! Have some fun!”

“I think you need to walk it off, Freddie--” Percy makes a rather displeased face, obviously not enjoying the nickname. “--We still need to walk all the way back to Greyskull and or another bar.” And knowing how much Pike and Grog could take, they’ll be out until nearly first light.

“Then, I believe you should personally escort me back home.” The point is emphasized when Percy narrowly avoids falling over while sitting down. “Keep me out of trouble.” That makes Vax roll his eyes, and give a deep sigh.

“You are far more trouble sober, Percy.”

“I try very hard to be.” The white haired man smiles softly. “Be that as it may, I'd much like to get back before I do something I regret--” They both hear cheers from Keyleth and Grog about firewater, and that's motivation enough to leave. “--like that.”

“You make a fair point, let's head home, Whitey.” Percy makes another, more disappointed face, as they say their good nights and head out into the still bustling streets of Emon.

The keep is a good distance away from the middle of the city where their pub crawl landed them, but it's time enough for them both to sober up enough not to end up asleep on the side of the road; Percy sticks to Vax’s side like glue, almost hyper-aware of the fact that he's very there and looking out for him. The closeness isn't terrible--Percy barely makes it to his shoulders in height and leans on him as they walk--but the other man is eerily silent, almost lost in thought as they make their way back.

It isn't until he's at Percy’s door, that he finally speaks up.

“…You should stay a while.” It doesn't come out nearly as confident as he'd intended--mostly due to the fact that he was relying on liquid courage and only ended up rather drunk and incoherent until they'd made their way back--but it is genuine; Vax gives him a look, halfway between confusion and curiosity.

“Well I do live here, so I plan to.”

“No, with me. In my room. ” He really doesn't want to so clearly state his intentions, but…

“I get it.” What I don't get is why you dragged me back here. “I thought you didn't want to do anything you'd regret.” This isn't like you, Percy.

“I assure you that you aren't something I'd regret doing, Vax.”

“ Someone's been spending too much time around Scanlan. If I didn't know better, I'd say you're trying to seduce me.” And doing a miserable job of it, but he’ll give the man the benefit of the doubt.

“No, what I'm trying to do is a little more…simple.” Percy rubs the back of his neck, and leans against the door of his bedroom, trying to find the right words; he probably should've had a little less if he was going to try and make a more convincing proposal. “The others might not be back for quite a while and, well, we’re alone here sans the hired help…”

(God, don't make him say it out loud, he’ll seem desperate. Well, he is but he's a man of pride.)

“You…cannot be serious.” The half elf tangles his fingers in his own bangs, half mystified and half ready to smack the other in the mouth. “You're asking, me of all people, to f--”

“In many more words that are trying desperately to be a little more subtle.” There's a genuine blush that comes to his cheeks. “It's the first time in weeks we’ve really had a free moment to ourselves, after all.”

“Why not ask Grog or Scanlan,” Or literally anyone else who doesn't want to occasionally want to smack you upside the head for being dumb for someone so smart.“Who probably are more partial to the idea of a fling?”

“Do you want me to break ?” That gets a good laugh out of the both of them, at the very least. “I don’t know what’s worse, him actually breaking me in two or finding out whatever he hide under that glorified loincloth of his.” More laughter. “God knows where, what and who Scanlan’s been in.”

“I’m sure, either way, it’d be a good tavern story.” Another chuckle. “Now, please tell me you’ve been joking.”

“I-I’m afraid not. I’m always quite serious on this.” Vax looks Percy in the eyes, studying his expression carefully; having a bit of fun during a night of drinking is one thing, but he knows one thing about the man: he never deigns to suggest something like this unless he’s thought it over and over again. “Just not necessarily coming out quite right at the moment. I still would enjoy spending the night with you--if you’d let me.”

There’s a nagging feeling in the back of the raven haired man’s mind, that he can’t quite place, but he ignores it. Oh why not. He can’t help but indulge this, honestly, it’s a win-win. And fucking with Mr. Calm, Cool and Collected is a once in a lifetime opportunity, after all.

“Alright.” He puts up a finger before the shorter man can speak. “I’m going to take off my armor and put away the rest of the arsenal for the night. You do the same, and I will be back in fifteen minutes; if you’re still conscious by then, we’ll have a good time.” Percy simply nods, and they go off to their respective rooms.

Needless to say, Percy undresses himself a little more frantically than he probably needs to, but he still takes his time to fix up the place a bit--it’s bare, unsurprisingly, seeing as what he owned were tools for the most part and they were all downstairs where they belonged--even though it’s pitch black and he has no plans to put on any lights, he still feels slightly awkward. No one comes in his room for the most part, unless it’s for a favor or they're heading out for another adventure, so inviting someone inside felt so foreign and--

Ugh, he’s overthinking this.

Sure, he’s never done this before but it’s just an urge. Just roll with it if Vax actually takes him up on the offer and hope he isn’t particularly embarrassing throughout.

The quietest of footsteps interrupt his thoughts--it’s a miracle that he hears anything at all, but the rogue lets himself be heard when he wants to be, after all--and he almost jumps out of his skin because oh god this is really really happening . He nearly turns on his heels, but Vax is already behind him.

“You don’t need to try and sneak up on me, you know. I invited you here.”

“And miss you getting spooked? Never.” Vax lazily rests his head on Percy’s shoulder--he has to scooch down a bit, it strikes him funny--before his hands, ahem, wander a bit. “Now, just to double check, you’re sure about this?”

“Very.” A shudder goes down his spine, as Vax undoes the buttons on his vest, before tugging at and untucking his undershirt. “You needn’t worry so much, I’m not a fragile flower. I don’t break easy.”

“We’ll see about that, soon enough.” The half-elf simply grins, mentally noting that he should definitely go on and test that claim right away; his fingers gently graze across the bare bit of skin now exposed, and Percy practically falls into the man behind him, a soft gasp escaping his lips. “Just remember, you asked for this.”

“Stop being a tease, and fuck me already.” There’s a mix of irritation and impatience in his voice, and the slightest hint of begging. Vax quite likes that last part.

“What happened to subtlety, dear Percival?”

“I believe it went out the door when you so kindly started undressing me.”

“That, is me merely being helpful. However, this--” There's a small gasp as Vax’s hand moves over the crotch of the others pants, gingerly groping him through the fabric. “--is more like it.” There's but a quiet, but approving, moan of agreement. It continues for a few, arduous moments, before the white haired man is turned around, and slowly moved back towards his own bed. Vax, brings a finger to his lips before pushing him down onto the bed; despite the darkness in the room, Percy watches in what can only be described as awe, as he feels the weight of the other man on top of him, straddling his hips. There’s the ghost of a sentence on his tongue as he feels his glasses being taken off, and gently hears them being placed on his nightstand. How considerate.

Now there’s hands at his throat, deftly undoing the knot of his ascot, and Percy finally feels his body relax a little bit--until he feels the soft silk being tied around hiseyes. There’s a distinct moment of panic before his common sense kicks in as he realizes that he already can’t see due to how dark it is and his now missing glassesand that he’s mildly into wherever this is starting to go. His hands start to wander, gently resting on the other’s hips, not daring to push any boundaries without permission.

(The white haired man really doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do in this position, really, so he’s just going to follow Vax’s lead and hope he doesn’t make a fool of himself.)

“Relax, Percival. You're not going to enjoy it when you look like you're being put to the sword.” It's amusing that the person who specifically asked for this encounter was the one all tense about it; there's a moment where Vax wonders if Percy’s in the dark--more than literally--on the whole intimacy thing, but he doesn't linger on the idea. “Just, for once in your life, don't think about it.”

“Easy for you to say.” He grimaced, before smirking. “You're the very best at not thinking sometim--” He's cut off by fingers tangling into and pulling on his hair. Oops.

“You know, I was going to go easy on you but you've so kindly changed my mind.” Vax doesn't let another word get out as his lips crash into Percy’s, and pushes the man under him forcefully on his back; the kiss is more teeth than lips, more(feigned) anger than passion, but it does the trick as the quiet is only broken by the soft sounds of lips on lips, and quieter moans occasionally escaping the gunslinger’s mouth.

One of the rogue’s hands releases from the other’s hair, and attempts to undo the buttons on Percy’s shirt, before just ripping at it until the distinct sound of buttons hitting the floor are heard and a soft, annoyed, groan comes soon after. His lips further down now that the pale skin is exposed, and Percy finally gets a breath of air after what felt like hours of being kissed. It takes a few moment, but he manages to get enough bearing to start taking off both his own shirt that is so lovingly ruinednow, and attempts to get Vax’s shirt off; it’s a miserable and futile effort before he keeps getting pushed down again and a again, so he gives up and settles for sliding his hands further downward, lingering at the waistband of the man’s pants.

There's a not even a moment of hesitation this time, as Percy’s calloused fingers trace the outline of the other’s hips--the skin is soft, and he has restrain the urge to take his fingernails across it--and he realizes there's, ahem, something missing from this picture.

Oh, Vax’ildan , you’re terrible.

He's about to do something, but the thought is all too quickly thrown from his mind as he is painfully reminded of how inexplicably, and uncomfortably turned on he currently is; the transient friction he's able to get with the man on top of his isn't enough to satisfy him, so his hands squeeze between his and Vax’s hot bodies, trying to feel for the belt of his pants. His hand is grabbed (well more like, smacked) before he can make any real headway, however. The weight on his body shifts, ever so purposefully, before he feels hands undoing his belt, and then the buttons on his pants.

There’s a sigh of relief, the unpleasant pressure on his aching, burning--he’s suddenly very glad that his eyes are bound, because he doesn’t think he can properly handle whatever look there is in the rogue’s eyes as he fully undresses him; all that he hopes is that he everything but disappointed, but the feeling of hands on his body reassures him that he shouldn’t worry too much.

As he feels Vax get off of him entirely, he sits up, and undoes the knot of the fabric around his eyes, and is reminded of oh so very naked he is.

Completely exposed.

And he can see the faintest silhouette of the other man’s slowly undressing body, and he’s suddenly really mad he can’t see in the dark. The atmosphere is perfect, and he really doesn’t want to ruin that with a light or two but this isn’t nearly as fun when he can’t see shit.

“Vax?”

“Yes?”

“Mind if I, uh, light a candle? I’d very much like to, ahem, see you.” He coughs. “Or anything, for that matter.” There’s a small amused noise that gets closer as he feels the weight on his mattress shift, and then there is the smallest bit of light from his nightstand; the dim light illuminates the both of their faces, and it’s a bit overwhelming to see that Vax is closer than he originally thought to him, and his hair is down, framing his face and, and--

“You are painfully beautiful.” He manages to get out, putting his glasses on again to get a better picture. He really didn’t account for the near chill down his spine that seeing Vax would give him, but he’s genuinely--and pleasantly--surprised.

“Flattery, Percival, will get you everywhere--if you hadn’t already gotten to where you want to be already.” He raises a finger, and gives Percy a small tap on the nose. “If you’re a mess now, you’re going to break in a bit.” That makes all the blood in the white haired man’s head rush to his cheeks (and elsewhere, obviously).

“O-oh.” Percival de Rolo you are in over your fucking head. “...I have no idea what to do here, honestly.” Smooth, asshole.

“Just follow my lead, and for the love of god, stop thinking .” It’s not fun if Percy is so self-conscious it stops him from enjoying this little fling. He pulls the both of them into a kiss--this time he feels hands tangle in his own hair and he smiles--less hesitant and a little more frantic due to the contact of skin against skin; they push down onto the bed again, a little louder than before, all worries about being caught lost in each other’s embrace for the moment.

Percy is gentle, fingers tracing the outline of Vax’s body and careful not to do anything out of line just yet; the closeness alone is enough to satiate his hunger for now, even though he desperately wants to go further (Vax is being a bit of tease and as fun as it is, he just wants to get off at some point tonight).

However, Vax is an asshole.

His nails rake across the soft--but occasionally scarred--skin of Percy’s back, leaving red marks that smart and bleed just ever so faintly that it makes the white haired man flinch and proceed to dig his (finely manicured and rather sharp) nails into the half elf’s ass. It continues for a few more breaths, before Vax is satisfied with his own handiwork and one of his hands moves between both of their bodies and his fingers hover over his prize, hesitantly.

“You okay? We could stop here, if you’d like.” Percy’s breathing a bit heavily, and he’s not sure if it’s in a good way or not quite yet.

“ Please .” It’s genuine begging now, whatever little bit of pride that was stopped him before is gone with his clothing. “I appreciate the consideration, but you’re killing me here. I haven’t the stamina to do this forever, you know.”

Vax just nods, his fingers gingerly wrapping around Percy’s length and he strokes, gently, slowly and carefully to gauge the other’s expression--and it’s pure bliss. It’s second only to the twins sneaking into his workshop while he’s tinkering away at a new idea and there’s a certain satisfaction (almost like he’s won a prize) in knowing that he’s the cause. It’s barely a few seconds before he has to slow his pace even further lest he finish things a little too quickly for either of their liking.

Vax reaches over the side of the bed, quickly looking for his long forgotten clothing and searching his pants for what he’d originally gone to his room to get in the first place; there’s a moment of confusion when he puts it beside the two of them, but it clicks into place soon enough for Percy, and he awkwardly waits for some sort of instruction on what he should do other than be very confused (and turned on, but that’s a given by now). He adjusts their positions a bit, before speaking once more.

“Now, I really need you to relax, or this will be...difficult.”

“Just be gentle, for I am a fragile blossom in the wind, dear.” He feels a playful and gentle smack across his face, and he smiles. “Leaving me beyond repair is going to be far more of a challenge to explain in the morning.”

“Please go back to begging and moaning so I don’t regret not using your scarf to cover something else , de Rolo.” He sighs, and pulls them back into another kiss, more of a distraction as he works on loosening up the other man just a bit; there’s a few surprised noises that come out of him in the process, but he’s cooperative enough that it only takes a few moments of coaxing before he can pull away satisfied. Vax takes a moment to stare at Percy a bit, and smiles a bit. “You’re quite the catch yourself, I hope you know.” He doesn’t even get a word out of the other man, because Percy immediately turns his head to hide the flush that’s come in full force to his face once again.

Vax takes the initiative, pulling Percy closer to him, getting ready to--well he was getting ready for something, but the pounding of footsteps down the hall stops the both of them in their tracks. They look to each other for a moment, trying to wordlessly figure out what the hell they should do in this situation. Percy just presses his index finger to his lips as there’s the lightest rapping on the bedroom door, before it opens, ever so slightly.

(The candle next to them is blown out, Vax slides down onto the other side of the bed and Percy throws )

“Ah, Percy? You still awake?” It’s Pike, bless her heart.

“Just about to go to bed, actually. Is everyone finally back for the night?”

“Yeah! Most of them already passed out, and Vex was worried about the two of you after you left earlier…and Vax isn’t anywhere I looked.”

“He went for a walk a little while ago, I believe. He should be back soon.” He smiles when he sees her face peek through the door. “Make sure to drink some water before you go rest, you all were going pretty hard earlier.” It’s a genuine concern, and there’s a reminder that he should take his own advice after he’s done with his, ahem, work here. She laughs a little bit, nodding.

“Well, tell him on his walk back up from under your bed, that this’ll be a secret between the three of us until you want me to say otherwise.” She smiles, an all too knowing look in her eyes as she walks away and closes the door. Percy all too often forgets, how genuinely terrifying how the little cleric can and will be...well, so long as she doesn’t say a word (and she won’t, secrets are best kept with Pike, after all) it should be fine.

“You going to hide under my bed all night, or am I going to have to drag you out?” There’s the sound of someone very loudly banging their head, and Vax emerges once more.

“Why are there multiple guns under your bed?”

“In case of emergency. I’m not going to put it under my pillow like a madman.” Percy shrugs in the direction of where he hears the other’s voice coming from. Vax laughs, and makes his way onto the bed once more, and under the covers with Percy; if they’re going to get caught again, might as well spare everyone the full picture.

They get back in the rhythm they were trying to keep before--there’s a couple of very loud, panicked noises that come out of Percival as they try at first, and Vax has to cover his mouth a couple times--slow, but steady enough that they’re both enjoying it.

(It’s been a long time since Vax was with anyone, so he has to pace himself with someone who’s never been with anyone, it seems. That, and he doesn’t want to try and explain too much as to why the other man is limping tomorrow morning.)

“Vax, please , slow down a bit--I’m not going to last--” Percy’s breaths and words are ragged, and with each movement it’s taking every bit of his already fragile stamina not to ruin his bedsheets this very moment; only Percival de Rolo , would fucking worry about having to explain to the servants why his sheets were suddenly in dire need of cleaning after a secret tryst with his comrade, get a grip man.

“Are you really sure you want me to slow down?” There’s not even a hint of teasing in his voice this time, as he stops entirely in his tracks and Percy shudders noticeably beneath him, taking in a few shallow breaths.

“...Maybe not. This is--” He looks up at the shadow that he guesses is Vax, he can’t see anything now that they blew their only light out, trying to focus through the haze that his thoughts have become over the course of the night. “--A lot more, stimulation than I’m used to.” Mental is what he lives for, yes, but all this touching and contact is a bit much all at once, but all the same it’s nice to feel so wanted, even if it’s only for a night. “It's still good, don't doubt that much.”

“The fact I've managed to silence the man of a thousand carefully thought out words for a night is all the reassurance I'll ever need.” There's a shift, and he feels the other kissing him once more, this time all the more tender and genuinely affectionate; it’s distracting enough that they start moving together once more, even as there’s the smallest of protests coming from Percy, quiet and half hearted enough that he quickly gives up.

They stay like that for a few minutes, pace slower and gentler for the sake of the fragile flower that is Percival de Rolo all of a sudden, but impatience takes hold of Vax’ildan as he pulls away from a still frazzled and now mildly confused Percy; he gets up on his elbows to look vaguely in the direction of Vax’s face, but the feeling of a hand starting to stroke him quickly freezes him in place, unable to say whatever was on the tip of his tongue.

In a fraction of a section he lets out the quietest moan of pleasure, before moving his head forward at the precisely most terrible moment, before getting an eyeful of, well, himself.

The room is eerily silent for a few ticks, both a little unsure what exactly to say.

(Moreso Percy, because Vax is just contemplating what smartass comment he’s about to make to someone who just did that .)

“Always hitting your mark, eh?”

“Please don’t say anything else.”

“Had your eye on the prize there, did you?”

“Ugh, get me something to get--” He angrily waves one of his hands a bit. “-- this off of my face.” He would be fine with the whole situation sans the last couple of seconds, but it fades from his mind when Vax gently cleans his face well enough that he can calm down and fall back into the bed once more, relishing in the afterglow, if only for a moment.

It takes a moment for it to hit Percy that Vax is, most likely, not done with him for the night and it sends a chill down his spine; it’s a very attractive offer indeed, but he somehow doubt he’ll be able to really keep up.

“Ready for round two, De Rolo, or do you keep to sleep it off already?” The moonlight manages to hit Vax’s face enough to highlight his smirk, and Percy just gives him a defiant look--he’s not losing this (is it even a competition? Why is he so angry about it?) in the least.

(Needless to say, though, he’s the one having to bite his pillow an hour later, so all of Vox Machina isn’t woken by the screams of an overwhelmingly pleased man.)

Morning comes far too quickly for Percy, the bright rays of the sun hitting him right in the pupils as he comes to a very tired and groggy semblance of consciousness, his body strewn in an awkward sleeping pose now that they other person he’d shared it with was long gone. There’s a feeling of frustration in that Vax hadn’t even stood long enough to give him a good morning--he reminds himself that people don’t usually stay the night if they’re just doing to do that--but he shrugs it off as he feels a bit of paper crunch beneath his head.

“How kind, he left a note at least…” He grabs behind him, pulling on his glasses--wait, he doesn’t remember taking them off, or...much of the second half of the night, for that matter--and reading it.

It’s in Elven.

Asshole.

Had a wonderful night, Freddie. Don’t try getting up too fast in the morning or I’ll have to call the good doctor for you. - V

He almost wants to roll his eyes, but even moving a little too fast to put the note in his bedside table sends his hungover and exhausted head for a loop and he has to take a moment to steady himself enough to get dressed and go downstairs for breakfast and...multiple cups of very strong coffee.

The stairs aren’t too precarious once he’s woken up a bit--well, his ass hurts a bit, but that’s a given and should be fine if he doesn’t sit too long--and he makes his way to a room of equally hungover people, along with Grog who’s right as rain.

(Vax isn’t there at the moment, and he’s a bit thankful. He’s not sure

He gets a cup of coffee and sits down with a wince, before anyone says a word.

“You left rather early last night, you missed out on all the fun!” Keyleth throws an arm around Percy’s shoulders, still her bubbly self in spite of everything. “Grog and I got in a fight with a mercenary with a big lizard and…” Percy only half pays attention, sipping on his coffee and actively avoiding eye contact with Pike across the table, with a piercing look of approval that genuinely concerns him.

She simply nods at him, and he knows she’s not going to say anything but it’s still a bit, embarrassing to have someone else know about this.

At least it’s not, like, Grog who would scream it at the top of his lungs for years to come and Percy would have to change his name, move to Marquet and find a new life only to be tracked down again never to live it down all over again.

The morning continues on, with a reenactment of last night with wild shapes and all, and still no sign of Vax for breakfast--Percy isn’t sure if that’s a good or a bad sign as of yet, but he’ll simply talk to the man later on if necessary.

If he could find him, of course, that’s the fun part.

It’s evening now, and Percy is fine tuning the recoil of Bad News--when they had the carpet, he was nearly flung off of it and a weapon is worthless if it’s gonna kill him on his perch--in his workshop, when he hears quiet footsteps again, and he didn’t even move to look at Vax, until he’s sitting beside him on the bench.

“Hello, Percival. Feeling alright?” Percy has to stop his work, what it Vax laying his head on his good shoulder.

“I should ask you the same thing, I haven’t seen you all day.” There’s no malice in his voice. “Was I so bad I scared you off?”

“Nah, I was just sleeping until later than you. I didn’t leave for an hour or two after you fell asleep, anyway.” Percy has to look away, the slightest blush coming to his face at the idea of Vax checking up on him. It’s endearing at the very least. “Nevertheless, I came down here to make a proposition to you, involving our bit of fun from last night.”

“Oh?”

“How about we make that a...regular thing. No dating or anything, but if you or I are in the mood at night, we could just stroll on over to each other’s rooms when no one’s looking and be quiet about everything…” Vax is so surprisingly nonchalant about it all, he catches Percy off guard for a moment. “And Pickle ain’t gonna say a word, she pinky promised me.”

“P-pinky promised?” He loves Pike dearly, but whatever friendship she and Vax had could be straight up strange sometimes. “What, between you, her and Sarenrae that she wouldn’t give us up?”

“Yes, actually. She even said she’d heal up the mess that your back is at the moment.” A gentle pat makes Percy wince a little, reminding him of all the scratches that are currently smarting, only occasionally. “Win-win, yeah?”

Percy has to study Vax’s expression for a solid minute or two, wondering if he’s being serious or not; he’s been on the end of many a prank of the half elf’s in the past year and change of knowing him, but he seems serious enough.

“So long as this is our little secret, Vax.”

“As long as you keep it, Freddie.”

“Alright, on the condition you stop fucking calling me that , it’s very not sexy.” Percy grimaces, it’s his father’s name for god’s sake. “I’ll even let you properly tie me up next time.”

“Oooh, you drive a hard bargain, Percival.” There’s a hungry look in Vax’s eyes as he says that, and Percy is slightly concerned (read: the tiniest kind of turned on and almost a little terrified) but all for it.

“Shake on it?”

“Absolutely.” They shake, and Vax awkwardly looks around for a moment, before speaking again. “So, what if we….right here…”

“We are not fucking in my workshop.”

#critical role #percival fredrickstein von musel klossowski de rolo iii #percival de rolo #vax'ildan #perc'ildan #sometimes vi writes things #edit: how did i fuck up so bad and not put the ao3 link

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