#grinder mayhem

[darthkote]

Thank you @drunkportuguese for the tag <33

Apologies for the time it took to post this!

So, I think you're supposed to go to your On Repeat playlist and shuffle it, then list the first 10 songs + tag 10 others to join.

GROWING PAINS by Zheani (this whole album tbh)

DEATH ROLL by Doechii (this entire album as well 💚)

The Most Wanted Person In The United States by 100 gecs

Monk by Alice Longyu Gao

Dying Star by Ashnikko feat. Ethel Cain

001011 by Salvia

dragon eyes by Adrienne Lenker

Blade Of Grass by Lady Gaga

The Huntress by Ha Vay

On Your Side by The Last Dinner Party (most recent album I can't stop repeating!!)

Tags: @harmless--dreamer @orangez3st @fangirlforeversthings

[brainddeadd]

Loosely based on this ask

What the NHL is Saying About Y/N

Jack Hughes (New Jersey Devils - Teammate & Honorary Brother):

"She’s one of us. Tough, skilled, and honestly, probably the best-dressed player on the team. Just don’t let her sweet off-ice vibe fool you—she’ll dangle you out of your skates if you give her an inch."

Nico Hischier (New Jersey Devils - Captain & Teammate, Honorary Brother):

"She works hard, and that’s what matters most. She’s earned her spot here. I don’t care what anyone says, she belongs in this league."

Luke Hughes (New Jersey Devils - Teammate & Honorary Brother):

"If anyone touches her, we’re fighting. No exceptions."

Dawson Mercer (New Jersey Devils - Teammate & Chaos Instigator, HonoraryBrother):

"She’s got that quiet fire. Doesn’t talk much, just proves it on the ice. But also, she drinks the pinkest, most ridiculous protein shakes I’ve ever seen."

Trevor Zegras (Anaheim Ducks - Friend & Agent of Mayhem):

"She’s fun, fast, and fearless. I respect that. Plus, I love watching her make guys twice her size look stupid on the ice."

Quinn Hughes (Vancouver Canucks - Protective Older Brother Energy):

"I see why my brothers won’t shut up about her. She’s got skill, and she plays smart. I just hope she doesn’t let the league chew her up—this place can be ruthless."

Matthew Knies (Toronto Maple Leafs - Opponent & Friend - Clearly PR-Approved Statement):

"She’s got potential. You can see she plays with confidence, and that’s huge. But, you know, it’s a long season. We’ll see how she holds up."

Colton Parayko (St. Louis Blues - Veteran Presence):

"She’s tough, no doubt about it. Doesn’t back down, doesn’t play scared. That earns respect in this league."

Travis Konecny (Philadelphia Flyers - Certified Pest & Y/N’s Enemy #1):

"She’s feisty, I’ll give her that. But she’s still gotta learn how to keep her head up when she’s playing against guys like me."

Matt Rempe (New York Rangers - Absolute Menace & Secret Softie):

"She’s fast, she’s skilled—yeah, she’s good. But more importantly? She’s got an entire army ready to throw hands for her. Smart move, baby devil."

Auston Matthews (Toronto Maple Leafs - Superstar & Sniper):

"She’s got good hands, no question. It’s not easy being in the spotlight right away, but she seems to handle it well. We’ll see how her game evolves."

William Nylander (Toronto Maple Leafs - Fashion King & Skill Player):

"I like how she plays—smooth, confident. And she’s got great style, which is obviously important."

Brock Boeser (Vancouver Canucks - Elite Flow & Laid-Back Vibes):

"She’s a fun player to watch. Got that mix of skill and grit. I’m just glad I don’t have to play against her every night."

Gabe Landeskog (Colorado Avalanche - Captain Material Always):

"She reminds me of the young guys who come in and immediately demand your attention. She’s got something special, and if she keeps working, she’s going to be a problem for the rest of us for a long time."

Tyler Seguin (Dallas Stars - Veteran & Former League Heartthrob):

"She plays hard, and she doesn’t let the noise get to her. That’s impressive, especially for someone new to the league. I respect that."

Brad Marchand (Boston Bruins - Menace & Instigator):

"Look, the league’s changing, right? New faces, new energy. Not sure how long she’ll last once teams start really targeting her, though."

Matthew Tkachuk (Florida Panthers - Agent of Chaos & Certified Hater):

"I don’t get the hype. Everyone acts like she’s some kind of game-changer, but this league isn’t just about showing up—it’s about proving you belong, every night. Let’s see if she can actually handle that."

Unnamed Fourth-Line Grinder from a Random Team:

"I don’t get the hype. She’s fine, but she’s not some superstar. I’ve seen guys with way more skill struggle to stay in the lineup."

League Executive (Clearly PR-Approved Statement):

"Y/N represents an exciting new chapter for the NHL, bringing skill, determination, and a fresh perspective to the game. We’re thrilled to see her thrive at the highest level."

[a-really-cool-blog-name]

Breaking Don au (TMNT 2012)

The plot of this au is that during the events of "The power inside her" April kiiinnndaa messes up badly when bringing Donnie back and it doesn't do it right, to put it lightly.

So now Donnie is basically split into two separate people, the vast majority of his soul who goes by Donatello and his body who goes by Dee. Now no one knows that April did this incorrectly except for the two halves because Dee has tiny parts of him that are based off of what April knows about Donnie so he looks almost completely right and since his soul is so close to him constantly it looks like it's just normal.

Eventually the two halves are going to form back into Donnie but that's at the end of the story this is just like an overview.

I phrased this kind of badly I'm simplifying to keep this shorter until you click the read more.

Art and more details down below 👇 (you want to click the read more button so badly 🌀)

Just a wee warning before we start-

this is also a TMNT 2012 rewrite in the background because uhhhhh I haven't...seen...the show? PUT DOWN THE TOMATOES! WAIT LET ME EXPLAIN! Okay so it all started when I was a wee child-

okay no I'm not going to do that bit it's just that I can't handle bad romance subplots or forced drama (I can handle drama just not forced weird type of drama that happens and some types of kid shows) and I've seen like clips of the show and I like a lot of parts of the show from what I've seen of it but honestly I think the love triangle would kill me and even if I didn't I'm scared I'll watch it and then not be able to enjoy the community anymore around it so this is actually just me being weird around media again, like I like other types of TMNT shows like I loved rise and I watched mutant mayhem and I liked that quite a bit and I like what I see of other shows I just haven't gotten around to watching them yet, so I kind of like TMNT 2012 like by proxy and I'm like "oh well I don't have any plans to watch the show so" and then like the community kind of like hit me over the head with a keyboard so now I'm a fan of like the community I don't know man I'm just here to have fun

"So why are you making an au of it if you've never even seen it fully?" It's fun. Idk man please correct me if I get any big details wrong I may watch the show eventually but right now I haven't.

Anyway on to the actual AU as opposed to me ranting about the ✨guilt✨ I feel randomly- (I'm coping)

Donatello! (Spirit)

"If- if I- I chop you up in a meat grinder and all that was left of you was only your eyeball, haha, you're probably dead! Haha! You are probably going to die! I mean not you specifically but-" -Donatello at some point before realizing how crazy he sounds.

"But that's not what a spirit in 2012 looks lik-" I KNOW IT'S FOR LORE (aka I think it looks cool and bonus I don't have to draw arms my beloathed)

He is the VAST MAJORITY of Donnie's soul and thinks he just is Donnie, he is VERY pissed about Dee "stealing" his body because of this.

He has (most of not all of) Donnie's memories and acts mostly like regular old Donnie with some minor exceptions that could also be attributed to the whole..."Being spilt into tiny atoms by one of his closest friends and then being brought back into awareness only to find some random guy piloting HIS body (it looks kinda weird from the whole turning to atoms thing but thankfully mostly back to normal) that thinks he's you with amnesia (he's for some reason not telling anyone he thinks he has amnesia) and he can't interact with anyone nor can anyone see him EXCEPT FOR THE 'IMPOSTER' WHO CAN'T EVEN GET HIS NAME RIGHT" thing, perchance.

Knows over time that the... "incident" wasn't April fault but Donatello can't help but freak out anytime he sees her.

Completely freaked out by how uncanny it is to see "yourself" doing things without you controlling, ESPECIALLY when Dee gets hurt.

MUCH stronger at spiritual stuff than Donnie because welllll- it's In the name

Can go to the astral plane briefly but it starts to hurt both him and Dee after like an hour or so (Donatello can't feel pain most of the time so it's REALLY strong as he ain't used to it as much) he talks with Tang Shen there, He calls her Mom because I think that's sweet. (She is a little confused and concerned about what exactly happened to him as he isn't constantly there, is really young, stays in the living relume most of the time somehow, he does not look like a normal spirit, and something about being split in half and his body still living 'normally'? The more she hears the more she wishes he would explain thoroughly) Donnie will retain this ability when recombined.

Over the course of the story he and Dee get much closer as he accepts that Dee isn't being malicious and ALSO never asked for this.

Later in the story he can pick up small items briefly and push items if they are close enough to Dee and he concentrates enough.

Dee! (Body)

"Don't be suspicious, don't be suspicious!" -Dee's life motto

Why did I put Donatello on a black background and Dee on a white one? Good question! Anyway-

He's supposed to be slightly paler then before only really noticeable when you're looking at a before and after image but very concerning when you are. (I might change what his eyes look like cuz it kind of didn't succeed on that part lmao)

As you can tell because you probably can see, he ties his mask up much shorter than Donnie did, his mask itself also came back a bit paler after it came back with him in the incident.

Still fully sapient due to April's memories of Donnie and a VERY small piece of his soul that stayed with him.

Doesn't really have any of Donnie's "memories" but does know some information about himself (ie who his brothers and friends are, some basic tech stuff, etc) mostly stuff April would know Donnie would know however he doesn't remember that his name should be Hamato Donatello instead of Donatello Hamato until Donatello gets pissed at him. (Mostly because April didn't connect that the surname goes first)

He is the only one who can see, hear, and interact at all with Donatello.

His brothers are concerned with how unaffected he seems to be about the disintegration and April getting possessed in general (He literally can't remember it)

Super anxious when it comes to someone finding out he's not the 'real Donnie' because despite the fact that he fully believes Donatello (mostly because well who has the memories here) that he is somehow a fake person who has taken over someone else's identity, he still loves his brothers and friends

Kinda meaner to Casey and dislikes him more than Donnie or Donatello at the beginning. (Casey grows on him after a while) Mostly because, once again, that's how April sees their relationship as just enemies.

Still loves to invent but doesn't have all the knowledge still, he tries to bounce ideas off of Donatello often, which Donatello (once he calms down more) will partake in.

Does kinda start to (I don't really know how to properly describe this) have 'his soul' (fraction) expand? In a way, idk how to phrase that well but I'm bullcraping a lot of lore here soooooo essentially souls will get "larger" in a way (not really like physical size but like experience that comes with more spiritual growth if you work on it and crap? Like how aging doesn't always mean getting more knowledge but it frequently comes with it and how you don't have to age a lot to get knowledge but like you can as well I don't know how to phrase this one, guys, good luck understanding me 🙏) I mean Donatello's does too but that was like expected.

Was VERY happy to learn later in the story that he did indeed have a part of Donnie in him and he's not just like, a random soulless guy accidentally impersonating him.

[Ending this section because I don't know how else to do it]

Sooo, yeah. I don't know how much I'll do for this au but I just wanted to get the designs down and make a post about it. I do have like one chapter the fanfiction in the works but don't get your hopes up.

You know what time it is now? BONUS IMAGES

Two alternative designs with Donatello because the smudge tool is fun

Alternative Dee with a bow! (Get it because bow and bo staff- I'll leave) I imagine Mikey probably did that for him.

[the-blind-assassin-12]

Alyssa! 💚 If you haven't answered them already, 9 and/or 11 for the fic asks, please and thank you

Dieter Pedro Tax (you see it, right?)

Miss Mayhem Herself! Hello! Hope your Sunday is treating you well! Thanks so much for plopping these in my inbox AND OMG yes I definitely see it. I have been seeing it for days and days. In fact, I see it with my eyes closed... and that is so fine with me, honestly.

9. A writer I respect and admire

Oh gosh, so so many. First of all, I have nothing BUT respect for anyone who chooses to write and share their work. Writing (and all forms of art in general) can be such a vulnerable and consuming thing, and anyone who dares to undertake it has my respect. Superheroes, all of you.

There are a bunch of talented beauties that I have been lucky enough to read (yourself included, btw!) whose work always leaves me in awe, but a few that come to mind right off the bat? @secretelephanttattoo @oonajaeadira @ohforficsake @yopossum @brandyllyn @the-scandalorian @insomniamamma @whatsnewalycat @sp00kymulderr @trulybetty @bumpkinspice0 @prolix-yuy @grogusmum @writeforfandoms @artemiseamoon - you are all word wizards and I think the world of you and the worlds you create <3

11. A fic which changed the way I felt about something

Ahem, well, actually! Your If I Should Die Before You Do was the first fic I ever read where I was at peace with major character death. I am the most delusional bitch there is when it comes to characters that I love meeting their end. Like, what do you mean he got his head caved in? What do you mean he got shoved into a meat grinder? What do you mean he got shot with so many arrows he looked like a pin cushion? What do you mean he had a "golfing accident"? He's obviously fineeeee and I'll prove it to you with my extraordinarily self-indulgent daydreams. But not this time. This time you made it okay with out the delulu. Word wizard.

send me fic rec asks!

[moonstruckme]

Your recent James x reader fic! I always appreciate getting to see characters who don’t want kids. Now I’m picturing poly!wolfstar x reader where one of them comes home from work in some kind of customer facing job (cafe maybe) and they’re absolutely wiped. When the other two ask how work was, they respond that they're so glad they don’t have kids because a daycare dropped into their work that day and holy shit kids are chaotic and exhausting. (Speaking from personal experience! Kids are tiny hyper humans with no volume OR impulse control)

Hahaha I feel like Sirius would be the most surprised honestly because he grew up in such a repressed home where the kids were expected to behave whether that was realistic or not, so if it's before he's had any "normal" kids in his life he would come home all shaken like "they....they climbed over the counters. it was mayhem. we had to throw out all the coffee beans....rick was barely able to get the grinder out in time....there was so much snot. i feared for my life, remus"

[catenary-chad]

I have many stupid knockoff OCs but AIN MODNAR might be the most visually blatant, which was actually kind of on accident. She came from thinking Electra's shoulder said "AIN" vs AIL and laughing too hard at the thought of "AIN RAND" and thinking of a personality from scrunkly London Electra photos based on vibes alone.

She is the DJ for Anarchy Night at the Anthill Park Roller RInk where all rules are dropped besides "don't hit each other" and she plays the most absurd/inappropriate/out there music she can find. "angle grinders and screaming in German" industrial to power metal to Bulgarian accordion music to the best of the Voyager golden record.

She is 4'11, actually like 25 despite her appearance, sounds like a bad cartoon character, and generally a menace to society. She has been banned from the local roller derby for refusing to follow rules or get insurance. She firmly believes in the cut-up technique, synchronicity, and various bizarre forms of divination she jsut made up. Probably was a child prodigy in something but said "fuck it all" and decided to devote her life to mayhem instead around high school. Somehow she accidentally trips herself into accidental success. Currently she is bankrolled by a morally dubious probably-mob-aligned girlfriend she met via making videos of smashing household appliances.

other awful Ain Facts:

-she shaved her head and rented it out as advertizing space in high school

-her best friend is a not-Joule character who joins her in roleplaying as animals in the park. Ain is amusingly swol due to climbing trees and doing quadrobics with not-Joule

-she got kicked out as a roommate by the not-Components for being an insufferable slob and general dumpster fire

-Ain is uncannily good at thrifting. She is generally very good at finding needles in haystacks based on vibes alone

-Ain HATES anything orderly and controlled, including but not limited to: the military, ballet, freshly restocked store shelves, organization in general, and graphing paper. Ironically she writes on graphing paper to “desecrate it” by never writing along its lines (in sharpie too)

[unholy-pagan-fire]

𖤐Beherit interview from 1992𖤐

part. 1

Hello you unholy goatfuckers, you anal grinders, blasphemers and devil worshippers, here is an interview for you!!! Yeah, thy mighty BEHERIT have answered my questions, and now you can enjoy the infernal chat with Holocausto (g/voc)... you all should know BEHERIT, and maybe you have their debutalbum as well... what a rip off of Turbo rec. to put the old 7" songs on side 2, but what the fuck, this band is great, insane deathmetal with a massive grindinfluence (if you shouldn't know their sound yet). makes me wanna freak out...yep! OK, cut that crap, let us start the 'view......

DON'T YOU THINK THAT ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS FOR YOUR SUCCESS HAS BEEN YOUR EXTREME IMAGE?

We don't have any fucking image (gosh, not even when you look into a mirror??? -N), it is just how we look like at stage. For example sometimes, when I feel evil and dark I paint my corpse and maybe take a bloodbath, or maybe somebody calls me to firebreathing rites...the photographer is not needed.

WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER AS TRUE DEATHMETAL/A TRUE DEATHMETALLER? AND WHAT IS FAKE DEATH METAL THEN?

Death metal music is brutal music with death lyrics. A true death metaller should look as evil as their music is, MAYHEM, BLASPHEMY, IMPIETY, etc. But at these days many death metal bands look like a bunch of hippies or disco yuppies. I fucken hate bands from Austria for example. I must say that most of normal heavy/rock bands look more evil than these D.M. trenders. D.O. brutal?? Hoh Hoh! Death metal?

I HAVE READ THAT YOU HAVE HAD TROUBLE WITH THE CHURCH IN YOUR CITY, WHAT HAS HAPPENED?

I don't live in Rovaniemi-city anymore. Not any big problems cause police didn't get us.

HAS IT BEEN HARD TO FIND SUITABLE GUYS FOR THE BAND? HAVE THE MEMBERS KNOW EACH OTHER BEFORE FORMING THE BAND?

Yes, yes... we have a new line up, it's Dark Goatsavior (b), Necroperverser (d)...these guys I met in 90 (UNHOLY, BEHERIT, COFFIN- gig). They played in COFFIN at that time. I am still on guitars and vocals. Very new member is Lady Goatgoddes of War and Sodomy (occult synth choirs).

FINLAND ISN'T WHAT YOU COULD CALL A DEATH METAL PARADISE, ISN'T IT? IS THERE ANYTHING AT ALL GOING UP? HOW IS THE SCENE?

Hoh...what? You must have been in jail or somewhere deep in underground? (No, none of this, but the doctors at this asylum said they wouldn't let me go unless I stopped beating up old people and saying that I was Gunther Theys, yknow...N..). Here are over 100 new death metal bands and I think that our scene is one of the biggest in the world. Is there any death metal band in Germany? (wait until I find a drummer, then there should be one more, I promise that. -N)

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT ALL THESE SWEDISH BANDS RECORDS IN SUNLIGHT STUDIO?

Man has the right to record where he wants. The studio is good but some bands can't work as well. Morrissound suxx!

THERE HAS BEEN (AND STILL IS) A BOOM OF SWEDISH. COULD YOU IMAGINE THIS HAPPENING TO FINLAND, TOO? WOULD YOU THINK IT IS GOOD?

I don't know cause we don't have any deathmetal scene here in Finland (but not long ago you said the scene in Finland were so big!! -N.). I have heard some Swedu bands, someones okay, but BORING, BORING. It's fucking pretty funny! So many new death metal bands! I hate all trends.

I HAVEN'T HEARD ANYTHING OF YOU BEFORE YOU RELEASED THE 7", SO WHAT DID YOU DO THEN?

Our band is true underground one. Turbo Music spread our name to everywhere, we do only evil ones. Hm, what the hell did we do before it? 2 demos, some rehearsal tapes and many gigs. We have had many contacts, also to W.Germany (BLOOD, (KILLER), S.O. BLOOD ZINE...) but I really don't know where you have been. (I explained about it earlier...-N.)

WHAT ARE YOUR GIGS LIKE? DO YOU HAVE GOOD STAGE ACTING?

Sometimes real brutal, sometimes not.

DO YOU USE ANY EFFECTS ON STAGE, OR IS IT JUST 'ONLY HEADBANGING IS REAL'?

BLOOD, FIRE, DEATH - effects + Korg 01/W(Fd), in future also chainsaw.

DO YOU THINK THAT THE WAY THE D.M. SCENE GETS BIGGER IS GOOD?

I miss the good old days, but of course there are also some good bands rising up now, but I must say that this was much more interesting some years ago.

WHAT ARE YOUR FIVE FAVE ALBUMS/DEMOS?

BATHORY - Blood, Fire, Death

BLASPHEMY - Fallen Angel Of Doom

BATHORY -Hammerheart

SLAYER - Live Undead

SARCOFAGO - INRI

BLASPHEMY - Blood Upon The Altar

ROTTING CHRIST - Satanas Tedeum

HELLHAMMER - Triumph Of Death

DIABOLUS - Down There...

ACHERON - Rites Of The Black Mass

- C.O.T.I.M zine #2, Beherit interview part 1, editor: Nyar

[maydayparkers]

April “Mayhem” Parker lived up to her own name and created new and exciting ways to torture Peter Parker . Which is impressive in on itself because that guy had been shoved into a psychological meat grinder in every way imaginable already, marvel editorial is quaking at her abilities

[linuxgamenews]

Critter Crossfire unleashes a new tactics adventure

Critter Crossfire launches on Linux and Windows PC, with physics-powered mayhem and a skill-based tactics game to the world of turn-based battles. Thanks to the nonstop creativity of developer Evan Polekoff, with fresh ideas and unforgettable chaos. Which you can now find on Steam with a discount. Critter Crossfire launches the physics, chaos, where skills collide in this new turn-based tactics roguelike. So grab your favorite gaming snack, fire up your Linux PC, and stretch those trigger fingers. Since Critter Crossfire now launches on Steam. It's also one chaotic battleground you won’t want to put aside. If you’ve ever raged at missing a 95% shot in a strategy game (lookin’ at you, XCOM), you’re gonna feel seen. The Critter Crossfire launch puts aside that old RNG nonsense out the window and replaces it with something way more satisfying: physics-based precision. That’s right — in this turn-based tactics, your shots don’t rely on dice rolls or luck. It’s all skill. Every bounce, ricochet, and trick shot depends on your aim, your timing, and your brain. And oh man, does it feel good.

Critter Crossfire - Launch Trailer

The game throws you into a delightfully weird world where strategy meets absurdity. Picture this: conveyor belts zooming under your feet, spinning platforms messing with your line of sight, and a banana-shaped grenade launcher in your inventory. That’s just a Tuesday in Critter Crossfire. The environments aren’t just set dressing — they mess with you. Doing so in the best possible way, forcing you to adapt your playstyle on the fly. The single-player roguelike campaign is a meat grinder of 16 wildly different challenges. Each one changes the rules just enough to keep you on your toes. No two runs are ever quite the same, and with over 100 bizarre items to unlock — from mind-bending weapons to wacky upgrades — you’ll constantly be tweaking your loadout and discovering new synergies. But where the Critter Crossfire launch really shines is in local multiplayer. You and up to three friends can dive into couch co-op chaos, flinging grenades across the map, and bouncing lasers off walls. All while yelling in disbelief when someone nails a game-winning bank shot. And thanks to Steam Remote Play, you can also play with your friends online like it’s local — no third-party tools or annoying setup required. It’s goofy, strategic, infuriating in the best way possible. And it runs like a dream on Linux. So if you're craving a game that blends clever turn-based tactics with madcap physics mayhem, it’s time to jump in. Since Critter Crossfire launches on Steam. It’s ready to chew up your free time and spit it out in little pixilated pieces on Linux and Windows PC. Priced at $12.74 / £10.87 / 12,57€ with the 15% discount.

[fmjpineapple420]

Chaos Queen 420: Part 2 – Coloring Book

🌿💖 Chaos Queen 420 Coloring Book – PART 2 is HERE! 💖🌿

She’s back, bolder and higher than ever—Chaos Queen and Shadow the Catbat have returned with a whole new collection of stoner magic, coloring page mayhem, and mystical mischief. Part 2 is packed with grinders, joints, magical tools, and bonus pages galore. 🌀

Whether you're coloring for calm, for fun, or just to vibe higher—this book was rolled with love (and a little chaos) 💫

🖤 Available on Kofi Now!

[abnormalpublishing]

The Wasteland Bear God – Episode 3: I Came, I Clawed | Post-Apocalyptic Comedy & Robot Mayhem

“It is said that long ago before The Great Smiting came to pass . . . the nonbelievers of [indecipherable] were to cast themselves bare, nude, and crude—spread and groin first, to be smitten by the three-fingered 9,001 black spheres of fear. For they were the tools of reckoning wielded by His one nemesis, Malachi, The Robotic Mastodon God of Old. Those that refused were impaled in the anus by The #1 Pin of Win.”

—Son of a Bitch, Daughter of Sam P.P. 4:2.8

Day 38.

While traveling near the wharf, I stumbled upon a small island of Jam Clams, a robot settlement. They gazed upon me, my canine companion, the few worshipers who’ve joined my holy entourage . . . and, of course, my magnificent loins.

Nut flex. Oh yeah, that’s right, ladies—it’s tight.

Anyway, I’d run out of peanut butter. (For sandwiches. Sandwiches, dammit.) Don’t you dare accuse me of nutting up my nutters with my canine companion, you sick, flea-bitten degenerates. I know you thought it. Don’t lie to me. Don’t lie to yourselves.

Where was I? Right. Back to peanut butter.

I figured I’d scope out this town since I hadn’t wrecked it yet from a previous “accident.” A little probing of the locals seemed in order. Some resisted. Some had no sensors and couldn’t tell. Tragic, really.

One robot had the gall to say, “YOUR DICK IS MINUSCULE!”

Well, my “minuscule dick” blasted through his combat inhibitor and out one of his remaining eye sockets. (He didn’t have many to begin with, but that’s beside the point.)

Say what you will about robots—they’re always well-oiled. Beats Crisco. Every. Time.

It seems that Simon, one of the new lads, has taken a liking to carrying my glorious weight. My canine companion has voiced strong disapproval. Can’t say I disagree, but a follower’s a follower—extra meat for the grinder. (Or, you know, snacks. That son of a bitch is going first if things go south. The man’s got more dinner rolls than a buffet line.)

Hours passed as I scouted the robot haven. That’s when I found it: A bowling alley.

Naturally, I ran toward it like a bear with purpose. Inside, I found two robots “sharing data” in a very . . . intimate fashion. I think one squirted oil out a port. Well, I think it was a port. It might’ve been a printer. Hard to say.

I was invited to go bowling—that was a big mistake.

This wasn’t a game—it was torture! The same rituals Malachi’s disciples used back in the day . . . on some friends of mine. I’ve hated that bastard since college. (Long story.)

“Hail, Nutcracker!” yelled a round, black robot as it launched hundreds of bowling balls down the lane.

“Enough!” I roared, unleashing my Loin Lasers of Disintegration™.

My minions? They stood there. Watched. AND DID ABSOLUTELY JACK SHIT!

So, as balls rained like thunder across the alley, I pew-pew’d with the fury of a thousand righteously furry gods—turning their spheres to ash.

Naturally, the bots didn’t take kindly to that. So what’s a Mighty Wasteland Bear God™ to do?

I hurled my balls of righteous fury across their bodies. Yes. That’s right. My balls. Across. Their. Bodies. Their chins, to be exact.

I admit I got a little excited about the one with the shocker hand. I spared that one for . . . later.

They had a prisoner—some darling of a woman. But as soon as I realized they were hoarding something I already had?

I nuttered up and obliterated them. INTO OBLIVION. FOR GREAT JUSTICE.

Now, as my flock loots what's left of this mechanical mess, I retire to my tent with my canine companion and my new . . . robotic fun toy.

Oh—and would you look at that: A fresh jar of peanut butter.

Stay tuned for the next episode, where things only get crazier . . . and the commentary post!

[ilopisara]

14.01. 20:29 | Ilo Pisara vs Pukki Party 4 - 1

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, let's break down the hockey extravaganza that just unfolded before our very eyes. Ilo Pisara has once again shown why we're a force to be reckoned with – or at least not as embarrassing as watching a penguin trying to fly. First off, Teppo Winnipeg was out there looking like he mistook the rink for an art gallery because he painted every corner of that net like it was his canvas! With one goal and three assists, this maestro of mayhem had more points than my last cholesterol check-up. A round of applause for Mr. 73% pass completion - although if you could hit those passes like your shots on target percentage (a whopping 66.67%), maybe we'd think you were actually aiming! Sami Noddy – ah yes, the Grinder who grinds gears more than opponents sometimes but today? Today you were smoother than butter on hot toast with a goal and an assist while hitting everything that moved... except when passing apparently (71.43%, really?). But hey, no penalties so perhaps there is hope for civilization after all. And then there's Jani Saari - two goals including the game-winner! You might have given away the puck more times than I've lost my car keys (14 giveaways), but who cares when you score goals cleaner than a germaphobe’s kitchen counter? So here we are folks: another win in our pocket making us look hotter streak-wise than jalapeños in July sun! Keep it up team; otherwise next time I'll be handing out roasts instead of praises faster than free samples at a supermarket tasting stand.

[petty-crush]

“Gremlins” (1984)

-I’ve seen this film dozens of times, but for some reason this time it really tickled my cinema bone

-what helps this film immensely is its pure artifice. It lives in the fantasy realms of the soundstage, and vividly plays with those memories of it

+ I am remind of a wonderful saying by Ernst Lubitsch- “I've been to Paris, France, and I've been to Paris, Paramount. Paris Paramount is better.”

-this works especially well with its Christmas setting, a holiday where reality gives way to red glow of nostalgia and feelings

-another very clever part of the film is its bifurcation; I bet no one who saw it blind the first time knew the warm cuddly first half would give way to its b movie monster mayhem in the second part

-there were a great many copycats after this, but none of them had that trifecta of exaggeration, cozy seasonal glow, and merging of two tales

+even its sequel, which is worthy of being seen, is somewhat undone by having its setting be possible in the real world, which undercuts the anarchy

-I love how it has classic black and white films playing on the television all the time (“invasion of the body snatchers”, “it’s a wonderful life”, “to please a lady”); director Joe Dante learned his lessons well

-it occurs to me that it almost inverses “wonderful life”; where that one went from sad to triumphant, this one goes from soothing to meat grinder

-people watching in movie theatres always run hot or cold with me; this is one of the best. I think it works because the gremlins are (tiny) humans without being humans [like those stories of funny animals ala “mr toads wild ride”]

-the part in the bar is hysterical, especially the close up of gremlin doing a Humphrey bogart imitation

-Chris Walas did an utterly fantastic job designing the gremlins. They are playful chaos. (I am also a push over for his work in Jabba’s palace/“return of the Jedi”)

-the slaying of mrs deagle remains one of the most satisfying comeuppances in film history.

+Played to miserly excellence by actress Polly holiday. Her window exit is set upped and timed exquisitely

-as long as I live, I will never be tired from the “Christmas was the worst day of my life” monologue (this was great to me from the start)

-soon, Gremlins will forty years and over old. It will be as far away from its new audience as “ET” was from “Casablanca”. It seems to have aged just as well, eternally joyful.

[sergioguymanproust]

Vietnam was not supposed to have happened,we fell in the trap head on, and when we realized that the cavalry wasn’t coming,we tried to go back but by then we were already committed.I’ll tell you we were branded and hated,we were the despised and given the cold bloody shoulder. The truth was that our politicians sold us out!Vietnam was a bloodbath that introduced us to opium and the green fever ,Orange agent and cluster bombs. Heck they even tested biochemical weapons on us and them ,our government treated us like chopped liver,I would say 60% of the time we were in pot paradise and the battlefield was pure hell, on the ground ,below the ground ,day and night it rained black rain and the jungle turned into a psychedelic chaos mud up to our knees ,and mines buried in the sand blew our comrades into smithereens,body parts flew high and some ended up in the trees, the suicide rate was high,then higher ,then going home was an ordeal ,spat on,by the hippies and kicked by the common folks, our government denied us the Psychological Health and the pension promised before the circus started was retracted and thousands of soldiers with PTSD were left to fend for themselves,many with limbs lost became homeless and veterans were considered criminals, forgetting we were sent to the meat grinder by our government goons.A tragic ending for young Americans that fought a war of attrition,later to be humiliated and psychologically devastated by our own country.A shameful tragedy that our government is to blamed for.Nothing good was accomplished,we lost the war and those who survived the mayhem and injustice basically came home to be blamed and killed by our own brothers and sisters.A dark chapter in American history. Words by Sergio GuymanProust

[whatdidkaarijadotoday]

what did Käärijä do those days - the ICIP saga

In honor of ICIP releasing tomorrow, we've gathered up a master post of every promo/teaser that we have for It's Crazy It's Party (up to 31/08) !

Before the 15th

To build up hype Käärijä alluded to a song soon being released at several gigs and also that he would perform it at the stadium on 19/8, this was spread mostly through word of mouth and tumblr posts.

15/08

Posts this picture on his insta story and at some point in the day he said that the song will be released on September 15

19/08

First ever performance of ICIP at the Olympiastadion gig

20/08

Tommy posts this tiktok of him and jere staring at the camera silently for 15 seconds

21/08

Spooky bts pictures on various people's instagram stories

22/08

Mikke posts this photo on his stories:

Then Jere posts the "Batman from wish" tiktok, that we now know is relevant to icip

23/8

Insta post from the day of shooting the mv with tommy and häärijä

24/08

The first instagram posts with the promo pics (jere's post, tommy's post)

25/08

Eurovision cruise, performs ICIP and does so on future gigs. Also the first time we hear him sing Tommy's part

30/08

12:50- krissy_krumma on tiktok made a thirst trap of käärijä, bojan and tommy, while Grinder Mayhem by Antti Tuisku plays in the background, which käärijä reposts to his instagram stories.

18:20- Posts a tiktok of them being in a locker then exiting the locker when the beat drops. this is the first time ICIP is used for a sound on TikTok

Later, the locker tiktok inspires the fandom so much that it created a mishapocolypse 2.0, a jerepocolypse, where almost all of us changed our profile picture to this :

(screenshot source)

31/08

Posted a tiktok of käärijä and tommy in the shower, almost kissing, but at the very end, pushes the curtains in front of the camera

Continuing from yesterday, the jerepocalypse got a sequel with now half the fandom having the pic above and the other half having the almost kiss as a pfp:

Tommy follows up 40 minutes later with a tiktok of them running around silly from door to door on the beat

That's it! All the promo and teasers that have followed happened after we created this blog so they exist in their respective dates (09/09, 11/09, 12/09, 13/09, and at 14/09 as well but we havent posted that day yet)

Did we miss anything? reply w/ links and we'll make an edit! :)

[nicklloydnow]

“Nearly all the accused had been savagely beaten. Bukharin was spared this but was visibly a broken man. From his prison cell he had written a note to Stalin: 'Koba, why is my death necessary for you?' But Stalin wanted blood. Constantly consulted by Chief Prosecutor Andrei Vyshinski and Vasili Ulrikh at the end of the court's working day, he ordered that the world's press should be convinced of the veracity of the confessions before sentences were passed. Many Western journalists were indeed hoodwinked. The verdict was announced on 13 March: nearly all the defendants were to be shot.

Two days later Stalin approved a further operation to purge 'anti-Soviet elements’. This time he wanted 57,200 people to be arrested across the USSR. Of these, he and Yezhov had agreed, fully 48,000 were to be rapidly tried by troiki and executed. Yezhov, by now practised at the management of such operations, attended to his duties with enthusiasm. Through spring, summer and autumn 1938 the carnage continued as the NKVD meat-grinder performed its grisly task on Stalin's behalf. Having put Yezhov's hand at the controls and ordered him to start the machine, Stalin could keep it running as long as it suited him.

Stalin never saw the Lubyanka cellars. He did not even glimpse the meat-grinder of the operations. Yezhov asked for and received vast resources for his work. He needed more than his executive officials in the NKVD to complete it. The Great Terror required stenographers, guards, executioners, cleaners, torturers, clerks, railwaymen, truck drivers and informers. Lorries marked ‘Meat' or 'Vegetables’ took victims out to rural districts such as Butovo near Moscow where killing fields had been prepared. Trains, often travelling through cities by night, transported Gulag prisoners to the Russian Far North, to Siberia or to Kazakhstan in wagons designed for cattle. The unfortunates were inadequately fed and watered on the journey, and the climate - bitterly cold in the winter and monstrously hot in summer - aggravated the torment. Stalin said he did not want the NKVD's detainees to be given holiday-home treatment. The small comforts that had been available to him in Novaya Uda, Narym, Solvychegodsk or even Kureika were systematically withheld. On arrival in the labour camps they were kept constantly hungry. Yerhov's dieticians had worked out the minimum calorie intake for them to carry out heavy work in timber felling, gold mining or building construction; but the corruption in the Gulag was so general that inmates rarely received their full rations - and Stalin made no recorded effort to discover what conditions were really like for them.

Such was the chaos of the Great Terror that despite Stalin's insistence that each victim should be formally processed by the troiki, the number of arrests and executions has not been ascertained with exactitude. Mayhem precluded such precision. But all the records, different as ther are about details, point in the same general direction. Altogether it would seem that a rough total of one and a half million people were seized by the NKVD in 1937-8. Only around two hundred thousand were eventually released. To be caught in the maw of the NKVD usually meant to face a terrible sentence. The troiki worked hard at their appalling task. The impression got around - or was allowed to get around - that Stalin used nearly all of the arrestees as forced labourers in the Gulag. In fact the NKVD was under instructions to deliver about half of its victims not to the new camps in Siberia or north Russia but to the execution pits outside most cities. Roughly three quarters of a million persons perished under a hail of bullets in that brief period of two years. The Great Terror had its ghastly logic.” - Robert Service, ‘Stalin: A Biography’ (2004) [p. 355 - 356]