#grimmons romance is always weird in a way

[weatheredlaw]

what i liked about rvb: restoration (spoilers ahead)

okay i've spent a lot of time complaining to some friends today about what i didn't like about restoration, so i'm going to tell all of YOU what i did like, because i don't like to inundate myself with negativity!

Caboose

as a caboose fan, as a caboose girlie, as someone who has written a bunch of caboose fic - i fucking stayed winning last night. burnie keeping caboose knowing how to speak spanish was excellent. caboose was treated so well, he really wasn't the butt of a joke (the bit about epsilon programming in the "shut up caboose" lines was very funny to me, it's peak church and caboose and the fact that they came out and weird times was so so funny)

follow-up caboose point: i LOVE that he's too unpredictable for epsilon, it's truly caboose in a nutshell. and he was treated as capable and able to do things. he was also so GOOD. i'm absolutely not over this and i probably never will be:

caboose deciding to bring back tex because he wanted them to win? flawless. no notes. excellent.

Grimmons

i knew as soon as it was announced that burnie was writing this season that we were not going to get the grimmons ending of our dreams (yes i saw that google drive, yes it haunts me forever) but this isn't about what we didn't get

it's been 21 years since "why are we here" and i loved the shots of the two of them standing together. it always feels right when they're a pair, no matter what's happening.

i'm going to take what i got and write the fix it fic later. simmons gave grif what he always wanted - a way out. he gave him those papers, he said "here, you can leave, no strings attached" and the almost first words out of grif's mouth were: "come with me." it's romance, to me. i'll take it.

willing to go out in a blaze of glory together. say no more.

Sarge

i really wasn't sure if this was going to be a joke or not when it started happening. meta!tucker pulled out his sword and sarge was too close to the door and i said outloud GET AWAY FROM THE DOOR and damn

i know it was SUPER cheesy, but i was a fan of the sarge-grif interaction there at the end. sarge's animosity for grif has always been played up for laughs, but the last few seasons (retconned simulations or not) really strengthened red team. and the chorus trilogy did, too.

man i loved these lines:

(this shot makes me miss donut so bad but this is about what i liked, not what bothered me so please take this shot of sarge and the boys)

also sarge going back for caboose was so so so so good to me. "one of us" - yeah man, caboose is one of your boys. you gotta go BACK for your BOY. and he fucking did. i really wasn't sure if this death was going to stick, it got me pretty hard. (he didn't HERK-BLEH so idk if it counts but)

Tucker/Sigma

META!TUCKER RULES

conceptually, i fucking love this. i think it would have been nicer to get a bit more pre!meta tucker and see what was going on. his absence is handwaved a bit but if i'm able to remove seasons 15-18 from my brain, i'm able to focus more and say yes, ok.

i do have questions, like what was he acting like? did he do anything strange? did he disappear RIGHT away or did he linger and then go? it seems like wash doesn't know, and i think if wash knew tucker was the meta, he'd have been a lot more concerned (the bit at the end with wash and doc and tucker being taken care of was nice)

but i'm OBSESSED with this idea that tucker's stuck in there and he doesn't want to be there. really genuinely i love sigma and how nasty that little shit is. it's interesting that epsilon has the memories, but sigma still knows EXACTLY what the director did to the alpha and, even while it hates him for that, it's completely willing to use that on another person:

and THIS PART:

ugh MY BOY. it was nice to have tucker back, i was sad we had to see him like this and i wish we had more time with this concept, it's very delicious and it's one thing i do LIKE about the later seasons being retconned.

Wash and Doc

okay so i had to go back and watch some of the last episode of season 13 to understand this better, because i hadn't watched season 13 in a REALLY long time. once my memory was jogged i understood what was happening better. to recap, if you're like me and forgot:

wash and carolina were on the evac ship headed towards the reds and blues. after they win their fight post-epsilon death, it seems that the evac goes wrong and wash is injured. in that scuffle, doc dies getting wash to safety. this seems to be a breaking point for wash and doc manifests as a hallucination that Dr. Grey seems to be aware of. she never address that it IS doc, but she (and ADMIRAL FUCKING DONUT OK) are aware wash isn't doing well.

this was something i saw on reddit - doc being dead was foreshadowed pretty well! here's the image from the reddit page:

one shadow! i'm sure a lot of y'all saw this but i was busy thinking wash didn't sound like shannon mccormick (it was him! he just isn't talking about the show online really it seems - i haven't checked his tumblr for a while, but he's p much silent on twitter, i assume he came back after some negotiation because he and RT no longer work together, even before RT was dissolved)

EDIT: upon rewatching this it appears to move WITH doc but i do LIKE the one shadow thing so i'm gonna stick with this

also doc disappears from frame whenever other people are talking. no one ever addresses him, and i assume because he says doc's name while talking about the meta, Dr. Grey is like ah yep he's hallucinating again.

upon first viewing i thought this was a little rushed, and i still believe it was kinda shoved in there at the end, but after sitting with it and doing a little season 13 refresher, i actually really like this and i think it's very bittersweet. wash doing his best to cope with his guilt and thinking about the person who saved him and having them live on like this is incredibly hard, but it also feels incredibly REAL for his specific history and trauma

Other things

carolina coming when wash calls for her

wash BREAKING HIS LEG to call his best friend like dude wtf

simmons still wanting to save tucker, knowing he isn't the one who killed sarge

the work from home security guards. it's funny. it's really funny.

"i hate the future"

sitting around the fire and remembering! i cried! THIS SHOW AND I GREW UP TOGETHER

the trocadero song. it fucking got me.

tex and carolina fighting the meta. just. bad ass.

the framed photo of wash's cat

the AI's bickering in tucker's head. theta saying "he's tired and scared." delta comforting theta.

geoff really delivered grif's lines. they were SO unhinged i loved them.

speaking of VA's - michael malconian! honestly i was so worried when joel was fired that we were going to lose caboose forever. it made me SO sad to think about, but when they started making some PSA's and kind of made some jokes about the voice change (and in restoration!) i was much more hopeful. i really think he did a SUPER good job capturing caboose. my favorite scene in red vs blue is caboose saying goodbye to church in season 15 - and i think my second is now michael's delivery of caboose telling tucker he's already forgiven him if he decides to kill him. he just totally knocked it out of the park.

and just speaking of...him.

there's a lot i wasn't happy with, and i guess i could make a list about that, too. i feel like it's a lot of things y'all probably weren't happy with either, but this is what i DID love. and i think there's some more i'm just not remembering and i think i will come to really love this. someone already said it best imo: it was good enough and that's ok. i grew up with this show, seeing it end was incredibly emotional for me, but it feels right to say goodbye.

bow chicka bye now.

[demi-dufresne]

Halloween God

Because I’m sentimental and miss Halloween, here, have some red team loving to support my blue team pals. Grimmonns for romance in the @rvbficwars bingo!!!

Have you ever seen Mean Girls? Right. Yeah, come on, who hasn’t seen Mean Girls. Now I want you to picture that scene where Caty goes into a halloween party. Picturing it? She was all dressed up as Frankenstein's Bride, covered in gross, gory zombie makeup while everyone else was in skimpy little bunny outfits. Remember that? Now imagine Caty is an angry drunk who lashes out at everything, tackling potential boyfriends to the floor and eating all of her friends’ Oreos.

Because that’s pretty much Grif’s life right now.

“Hey, glad to see- uh. Grif?” About an hour prior to this shit going down, Tucker had opened the door, staring at the man in front of him. He was covered head to toe in bright orange armor, something that looked straight out of Halo 4. “Is that you in there, buddy?”

“Yeah, what was the giveaway?” Grif gave a grin, not that Tucker could see it.

“You’re the only one I know would show up in fucking- ugh. Whatever, just… come on in, hurry,” Tucker said, shutting the door. He himself had on a football jersey and jeans. Maybe the joke was that he’d never be caught dead in that outfit otherwise, who knows? Grif walked right into Tucker’s living room, a grin on his face.

Twenty steps in and the grin was falling.

Like, okay, he figured his costume would be a little out there. But his mom had ordered it online somewhere, he didn’t want to disappoint, and there was no way in hell he’d make himself a homemade costume. That required, like, effort.

He figured it’d be a little out there, but compared to what these other people were wearing, he was�� well, he was…

A goddamn Halloween god.

Okay, so maybe Grif lacked the humility most would have. Who needs to worry if you’re standing out if you’re standing out and looking this awesome? Not even awesome, effortlessly awesome. The only thing better.

Most teens around him were wearing sports uniforms or like, fishnets and short dresses in the cases of girls. Grif was pretty sure Tucker would be having an aneurysm right now. What a loser. Grif, in his Halo Spartan Mark VI Armor was definitely the coolest dude around.

He did spot one guy dressed like Link. The dude was talking animatedly to some other guy dressed like a doctor. Grif waltzed right over to say something. If this night goes bad, at least he could get a new friend to hang with, specifically one who loves Legend of Zelda as much as he does. Becuase hey. He would definitely need to replace Tucker, that asshole. “Hey, uh, Hey!” He struggled to shout over the echoing music. “So I’m guessing you like video games?”

Link turned around, looking him up and down. The guy had bright blonde hair, and patchy scarring across the left side of his face. “I mean, duh. I am Zelda,” he said. Grif took a second.

“You mean Link.”

“Uh, no, I’m pretty sure I mean Zelda. Or Donut. Pleasure to meet you!” The dude stuck his hand out for a handshake, which Grif ignored. He took a deep breath. Why did he continue to go to Tucker’s parties? They were always a fucking disaster anyways, he didn’t know why he thought this one would be any different.

“Right, uh… I’m gonna like… use the bathroom,” Grif said. He trailed away from the guy, not really having to go. He just didn’t want to continue that conversation, thanks. He had a little dignity. And boy, did he need a drink.

Little did he know, at the other end of the house, his situation was basically being met.

“Church! Hi! Uh, why aren’t you wearing a costume?” Simmons was standing at the front door to Tucker’s house, looking Church up and down. The guy was wearing a flannel and a beanie, with a half-emptied Solo cup in his one hand, his cell phone in the other. He was swaying a little. Simmons knew better than to comment on that.

“I’m a lumberjack, dumbass. Or maybe a hipster. Or a cowboy? I still haven’t decided yet. What the fuck are you?”

“Don’t you remember? You, Caboose and Tucker came over to my house last week, right after you and Tex-”

“Don’t say her name. Don’t even,” Church said, taking another long swig from the cup. He might have downed the rest in one sip. Simmons was pretty sure some of it got stuck in his goatee, but again. Didn’t say anything.

“Right. Okay, uh, we played Halo. The video game with the aliens. Remember that?”

“Sure, whatever, man. Come in, I guess,” he said. He opened the door a little wider, the pounding of the bass and the staunch smell of alcohol reaching his nose.

“Wait. What kind of party is this? I thought we were just gonna like, hang and play board games, maybe talk about TV shows…” Simmons trailed.

“You’ve obviously never been to one of Tucker’s parties before. Come on in.” Church opened the door wider, an invitation that he wouldn’t let Simmons decline. Simmons sighed, defeated. This armor weighed a ton. He didn’t know how long he’d be able to take this place.

He stuck out like a sore thumb. God, he was so stupid. Why couldn’t he have just dressed like Church, normally, finding something to say he was later? Then again, Simmons’ wardrobe and Church’s wardrobe were a little different. He didn’t know how he’d feel showing up to this place in a polo and nice slacks, either. Ugh, this whole thing made him want to leave immediately.

The song that was playing wasn’t something he was generally opposed to, thank god. Maybe that was his saving grace- the DJ had a thing for techno renditions of video game OSTs. He lost himself among the dancefloor, bobbing his head along to the beat. Soon enough, bobbing his head devolved into shaking his body, which lead to something that, whatever it was, couldn’t be described as dancing.

“Grif, cut it out!” Tucker said, pulling Simmons by the elbow. “You look like you’re having a fucking heart attack.”

“Who’s Grif?” Simmons said.

“Haha, very funny. Look. I found someone really hot. Some friend of Church’s sister, I don’t know. I don’t want you to make a scene, got it? You’re already a mess in that fuckin’ cosplay, dude. Now like, stand by the wall or, I don’t know, just… stop doing whatever that is. Like, you’ve been to enough parties you’d think you’d know that I’m just here to get laid.”

“What?” Simmons asked. But Tucker had disappeared into the crowd. “He’s probably stoned,” Simmons reasoned to himself. Yeah. That’s probably it. He wouldn’t put it past Tucker, especially at a nutty party like this.

“Hey, Grif, have you seen Wash?” Grif, meanwhile, was standing in the kitchen, looking in Tucker’s pantries for a box of Oreos when Carolina approached him.

“Who?”

“Oh, you know, tall guy, blonde hair on top, super grumpy?” She pulled a face, mocking her friend. Grif took another sip of the drink through a straw into his helmet. It was somewhere near his fourth one. He knew he should probably stop, but that wouldn’t stop him.

“The only super grumpy guy I know here is your bro Church, and I’m pretty sure he’s drinking away his sorrows in the dining room. Sorry,” Grif said.

“Eh, no problem. I’ll just ask your girlfriend,” she said, walking off towards the living room.

“My- my girlfriend? Carolina, what?” Grif said. He followed her, curious. He left the cabinet open, search for the Oreos forgotten.

He staggered after her. Arriving in the living room, he saw her across the dancefloor, talking to someone- wait. Someone in Halo Spartan Mark VI armor… No.

His vision was dancing, and only one thought crossed his mind.

There could only be one.

“Uh, no, I don’t know a Wash. Also, who’s that Grif guy you guys keep talking about? I’m pretty sure I’m not him, and I’m definitely sure I’m not dating him,” Simmons said.

Carolina ignored his last two sentences. “Oh. Huh. You’re a boy. Well, you send Grif my love, tell him congratulations on coming out or whatever. Now I gotta find Wash before Tucker does. See ya,” Carolina sounded off. Simmons shook his head, watching as she faded into the crowd. Maybe this is why he didn’t go to parties.

“You copycat motherfucker!” Simmons could barely register what was going on when he was tackled to the ground. Nevermind. This was why he didn’t go to parties.

“Wh- Wait! Wait, help me!” He called. Some dude was on top of him, punching him in the damn gut. He was wearing- wait. He was wearing Halo Spartan Mark VI Armor.

“Simmons!” Church called. “Simmons, stop punching- yourself? What?” He paused, looking down at the situation.

“Ah-ow-owww,” Simmons whined, curling up with each punch.

“I’m the Halloween god!” Grif cried.

“Grif, stop beating up your boyfriend, that’s domestic abuse!” Carolina called in, wrenching Grif off.

“Copycat motherfucker, I’m the halloween god!” He shouted again.

“What the fuck,” Simmons said. He was suddenly glad he decided to wear this stupid armor. It got him beat up, sure, but it didn’t hurt nearly so bad as when he was only wearing a Polyester-Cotton blend polo and khakis. Trust him. He would know.

“Alright, both of you, out,” Carolina said. “I’m serious. Leave. I still need to find Wash, before- aah, who am I kidding. He’s probably sleeping with Tucker as we speak. I don’t think there’s anyone here who hasn’t slept with Tucker, that asshole.”

Church nodded solemnly.

“Anyway. No more fist fights between you lovebirds, or I’m calling the police. We clear?”

Simmons, having not even drank a single drop, nodded. “Crystal.” He grabbed the other guy- Grif- by the forearm, dragging him after him out the front door.

“Stay here. You probably just need some water, or… something. I’ll be back,” Simmons said. He walked back into the house, closing the door behind him.

Grif was fuming. He was supposed to be the coolest one there, and they kicked him out? It was all the stupid maroon guy’s fault. What was his name again? Stimpson? It’s his damn fault. All Grif’d wanted was some stupid Oreos and now he’s stuck on Tucker’s stupid doorstep while Tucker probably fucks Carolina’s stupid friend. It was all so stupid.

He checked where his pockets would be for some cigarettes, then realized that they’d have to be under his armor. That stuff took ages to take off! Grif groaned, putting his face in his hands. He was too fucking drunk for this.

“Here. Maybe this will sober you up,” Simmons said from behind him. Grif didn’t move his head from his hands. Simmons sat down next to him, offering him the cup of water.

“I’m not thirsty,” Grif muttered.

“I found some cookies to make it better,” Simmons said offhandedly.

“You- you what?” Grif said. He looked over to Simmons, who held up the blue pack of Oreos he’d been looking all over for. “Where did you find those?”

“They were on top of the fridge. It almost seemed like they were trying to hide them from you specifically. Can you even reach the top of the fridge?”

But Grif was ignoring Simmons at that point, too driven to really care. “You know what? I think you’re actually the Halloween god. I take it back, that crown goes to you.”

“Oh really? Thanks,” Simmons said. He was being genuine, too. “You like the costume? It took me hours to make it.”

“Eh, I got mine online for like, twenty bucks,” Grif said.

“What?” Simmons said. He paused, taking off his helmet to get a closer look at Grif’s.

Wow. Grif was pretty impressed. This guy was kinda hot. Not in a conventional way, really, but… something about the (almost latin?) darkness of his skin with the bright red of his hair… It was nice.

“You can see the cracks in yours. Mine’s much better, obviously. I even have the little decals on the shoulder blades, see?” Simmons said. “Red team.”

He was a dick, kinda, but he was still hot.

“Yeah, well. Fuck that. I spent no time at all on this thing. Now who’s the real winner?” Grif plucked his helmet off, reaching for the Oreos.

Simmons wasn’t blind. Nor did he have particularly good taste in dates (that thing with Jenkins… that ended poorly.) But still. The guy who just beat him up? He was undeniably pretty.

“Dude. Would you stop staring at me? I’m trying to eat my Oreos in peace, thank you.” That didn’t mean he wasn’t an asshole.

“Hey, just out of curiosity. Cookie or the cream?” Simmons said. Grif paused eating, chewing thoughtfully.

“If I had to pick, I’d say cream. But then again. What’s the cream without a cookie? They’re a cookie sandwich, Simmons. What’s one without the other?”

“That’s… a pretty good answer,” Simmons said. “I think if I had to pick, I’d go with cookie, though.”

“Of course you would, Simmons,” Grif said, picking another cookie from the box. “Of course you would.”