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angelofthequeers · 5 years ago

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Hold Me By Both Hands: Chapter 27

Disclaimer: I don’t own ML.

Chapter 26 | Chapter 28 | AO3 link

Instead of continuing home, Ladybug swings over to the hotel and yo-yos herself up the side of the building until she’s on the railing of Chloé’s balcony. It’s kind of funny how reminiscent this is of Chat Noir’s visit to her before Glaciator struck, to be honest; maybe Chloé needs this open ear just as much as Marinette had needed Chat Noir’s that time.

“Ladybug! You came to visit me!” Chloé leaps off her seat and is next to Ladybug faster than a heartbeat, throwing her arms around Ladybug’s neck. Ladybug yelps and would have fallen off the balcony if not for Chloé yanking her over to the white seats. “Well, I mean, of course you came to visit me. Why wouldn’t you?”

“I was on my way home and I saw you.” Ladybug’s already heavily regretting this decision as Chloé shoves her down into a seat and then sits down and drags her own seat so close that their legs are touching. “I…thought you might want to talk about today.”

For a split second, Chloé’s smile vanishes. But then it’s back, though with a rather plastic quality to it.

“Why?” Chloé says. “You kicked that akuma’s butt just like you always do. With help from moi and my heart-wrenching sacrifice, of course.”

“Chloé, you can drop the bravado,” Ladybug says. “I know you’ve been trying to be nicer. Why did you ruin Marinette’s gift?”

Chloé snorts loudly. “Perfect princess Dupain-Cheng? She thinks she’s just oh so good. And how dare Sabrina just tell the class about my mother like that! Dupain-Cheng had it coming.”

Ladybug bites down on her tongue so hard that she’s left with a faint metallic taste. “I hardly think that Marinette’s intention was to make you look bad,” she says dryly. “Especially since she’s been helping you become nicer.”

“Forget it.” Chloé slouches back in her seat and crosses her arms, blinking rapidly. Is she…about to cry? Chloé Bourgeois, crying? “I’ll never be nice. Why even bother trying?”

“Because you can’t keep lashing out, Chloé,” Ladybug says. “I know there’s probably history with your mum, and I’m not going to insist that you talk to me about it, but…other people have hard lives as well and they don’t turn it on everyone else.”

“Yeah? Well, none of them are me,” Chloé snaps. “I’ve got everything I want. Daddy gives me everything. I’ve got a devoted best friend. And it’s never enough. It’s never enough.” She hunches over and covers her face with her hands. “I don’t even know what more I want. How the fuck am I supposed to give others what they want? Why should I even care?”

“I think you just want someone to understand you,” Ladybug says softly. None of this excuses Chloé’s bullying and entitlement, sure, but…it’s hard not to feel something for her. “I just don’t understand how you and Adrien could have turned out so different when you’ve got such similar upbringings.”

“Well, Adrikins has always been the perfect prince,” Chloé snorts while dabbing at her eyes with her jacket sleeve, smearing mascara all over the yellow material. “And our upbringings weren’t that similar, apart from the rich and famous and shitty parent thing.”

“Are you sure?” Ladybug says. “Adrien once told me that his mother only disappeared recently. But he must have been sheltered for years, right? His mother –”

“– was an amazing woman,” Chloé says. “Auntie Emilie…okay, so she was way overprotective, but she loved her kid. There. That’s your answer. Adrien’s mother gave half a fuck about him.”

“I’m sorry.” Ladybug reaches over and rests a hand on Chloé’s. Chloé gasps but she doesn’t pull away or give any other indication of discomfort. “I can’t imagine what it must be like to have a parent like that. But that’s not an excuse, Chloé.”

“I just want her to love me!” Chloé stomps her foot. “I tell myself I don’t care and then I see her and it’s like there’s a switch that just flips. She’s my mother, but she treats me like – like I’m a nobody! Like I mean nothing to her even though she’s the one who gave birth to me, so you’d think there’d be some affection!”

“I get that.” How long has Chloé been bottling this up? “But how do you think everyone else feels when you take those feelings and push them on the people around you?”

“You think I don’t know that?” Chloé says. “It makes me feel…good. Like they can have half a goddamn clue how I feel.”

“Chloé, you’ve contributed to more akumas than anyone I know,” Ladybug says gently. “It makes our job harder. I was so proud when I saw you give that birthday present to Marinette and then stood up to Befana for her.”

“You were at Dupain-Cheng’s party?” Chloé’s eyes bulge. “And you didn’t say hi to me?”

“I didn’t really have time to talk to anyone,” Ladybug says, choosing not to point out that she tries not to talk to Chloé more than necessary. “Look, I’m not going to coddle you, because you have to be the one to put the hard work in. But I do see your effort, Chloé. I do see how you try. Consider this your official encouragement.”

“Encouragement for what?” Chloé says. “To paste on a smile and turn all princess nice and sugary sweet…to turn into someone I’m not? I can’t be nice. I’m not nice. Props to Dupain-Cheng for trying, but she failed.”

“Hmm.” Ladybug chews her lip, struggling to find the words that Chloé needs to hear. “You don’t have to be sugary sweet. There’s nothing wrong with being blunt and snarky. But you don’t have to be hurtful as well. You could just as easily turn that bluntness into helpful honesty and that snark into banter. And people will see that you’re trying. I’m sure of it.”

“Wait, so I can be a raging bitch and still be a good person?” Chloé says. “Because that’s probably at least achievable within my lifetime.”

“Well, probably not a raging bitch,” Ladybug says. “But you don’t have to be sugary sweet. Just…work on being less nasty. It’s as simple as not being mean. Don’t say the mean thing you were going to say. Instead, turn it into a snarky half-compliment if you can. Baby steps. But you have to consistently try.”

“Okay, cool, so where do I start?” Chloé says. She groans when Ladybug raises an eyebrow. “Seriously? I have to apologise to Dupain-Cheng? You know I’m not gonna mean it, right?”

“It’s still good practice,” Ladybug says. “The more you do it, the more natural it’ll become. And I’m sure Marinette will recognise that you’re trying.”

“I hate apologising,” Chloé mutters. “But ugh, fine, I guess. Just don’t expect me to be nice about it.”

“I don’t think anyone expects you to be nice about it,” Ladybug says. “You just have to be good and genuine.”

“Okay, fine,” Chloé says. “I’ll turn myself into the jerk with a heart of gold trope.”

“I didn’t think you knew what a trope was.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Chloé says, though there’s a light in her eyes that hadn’t been there a minute ago. “I’m not a dumb blonde. I’m just a lesbian disaster.”

“Huh,” Ladybug says. “I didn’t know you were gay, Chloé.”

“Yeah, no one does. But you’re Ladybug. If there’s one person who won’t judge, it’s you.”

“Of course I wouldn’t.”

“Wait!” Chloé cries when Ladybug slides off her seat and unslings her yo-yo. “Where are you going?”

“I really need to get home,” Ladybug says. “School tomorrow, remember?”

“Ugh, fine,” Chloé says. “But come back whenever you want! You know I’d never turn you away, Ladybug!”

Maybe not Ladybug, but definitely Ladybug’s true identity. “I’ll keep that in mind,” Ladybug says. With a wave, she leaps off Chloé’s balcony and swings over the rooftops to the next street.

“Everything okay, Alya?” Marinette says when she tumbles into her seat the next morning and finds Alya staring off into the distance in a daze.

“Hm? Yeah! Fine!” Alya says quickly with a strange grin on her face. “Just a dream I had!”

Uh huh. Sure. A dream. God, how Marinette wishes she could smirk without letting on that she knows exactly what’s got Alya on cloud nine.

“Did someone, like, slip something in her cereal?” Nino says, twisting around to stare. Adrien follows suit, and his cheeks pinken for some reason when he smiles at Marinette.

“I have no idea,” Marinette says. “But she was fine yesterday, so I haven’t ruled it out.”

“Maybe she got to make out with Ladybug,” Adrien grins.

“God, I wish,” Alya sighs.

“You really think she’d be here if she did, dude?” Nino says. “She’d be at home screaming at me over the phone.”

“Nino, we’re adopting cats when we get married,” Alya says. Stars rush to fill Nino’s eyes at the m-word.

“At this point, I’m wondering why they don’t just sit together permanently,” Adrien says.

“Because they’d spend more time making out than doing schoolwork and we’re the only reason that doesn’t happen?” Marinette says. Adrien snorts.

“Where’s Ms B?” Alix complains from the other side of the classroom. “Is she, like, shaken up about yesterday?”

“You could possibly be a little more sensitive about it,” Nathaniel calls over. Alix flips him off with a cheerful smile.

“Um – about yesterday.” Everyone whips around to stare at the front, where Chloé’s standing in front of Ms Bustier’s desk with a grimace. “Thank…you all for sacrificing yourselves to save me. I know it was for Ladybug and not for me, but I’m still…grateful.” She looks at Sabrina and adds, “And I’d like to…apologise for using you as a shield from Zombizou’s kiss. You’re my best friend and I shouldn’t have done that.”

Nobody says anything. They’re probably all thinking the same thing: has Chloé been akumatised? Her next words don’t help that conspiracy theory.

“And I’m also…s-sorry for ruining your gift, Dupain-Cheng,” Chloé forces out. “I’m sorry for lashing out like that because of my own issues. I should have apologised to you yesterday, not to Ms Bustier. It was just easier to say sorry to her instead of you.”

Huh. Chloé really had taken Ladybug’s words to heart. It’s the reminder that she’s Ladybug and she’s the one who’d nudged Chloé to do this that makes Marinette smile at her.

“Apology accepted, Chloé,” Marinette says. “I’m glad you’re still trying to be a better person. I know there’s good in everyone deep down.”

“Yeah, you don’t have to be smug about it,” Chloé snaps. Then she visibly takes a deep breath and clenches her fists. “I mean…thank you.” She rushes to sit down, not saying a thing when Sabrina starts pelting her with questions.

“Wow, Alya really is out of it.” Nino waves his hand in front of Alya’s face, but nothing shatters her goofy grin. “Chloé was just semi-human and nothing from Al.”

“Her love for Ladybug is just that strong,” Marinette grins.

“Ladybug? Where?” Alya blurts out. Nino reaches over to pat her hand.

“Nowhere, babe,” he says. “Just go back to your fantasies.”

“You’re a better man than me, bro,” Kim says.

“Oh, please,” Juleka scoffs. “Everyone has Ladybug on their freebie list.”

“No one has Chat Noir?” Adrien says as Marinette’s cheeks start to heat up at the knowledge that her entire class would apparently let her do them.

“You know I do, bro,” Nino says. Adrien’s eyes turn just as starry as Alya’s.

“Bro.”

“Same here,” Marinette says. “Ladybug’s cool and all, but she wouldn’t be half the hero she is without Chat Noir.” Plus, having herself on her freebie list would just be…weird.

“I’m going to pretend that you didn’t just imply that Chat Noir can compare to Ladybug, for the sake of my redemption arc,” Chloé says loudly.

“Oh, I’d much prefer Chat Noir,” Lila says. Marinette resists the urge to roll her eyes at the sound of Lila’s voice. “Marinette was so right when she said that Ladybug would be nothing without him.”

“I didn’t say she’d be nothing.” No way is she letting Lila twist her words. “Just that she wouldn’t have a chance of saving Paris like she does without Chat Noir there to have her back. It’s a two-person job and even if she’s the only one who can fix Paris, she couldn’t cope without Chat Noir’s support. They’re a team.”

“Angels do exist,” Adrien murmurs, still starry-eyed.

“Aww, someone has a crush on Chat Noir,” Alix teases.

“What? No! Ridiculous that’s – don’t be silly!” Marinette babbles. The classroom goes so quiet that a mouse could fart and be heard clear as day.

“Oh my god, you do,” Alya says. Great, why can’t she be in a disaster pan daze when Marinette actually needs her to be in one? “And you didn’t even tell me?”

“I’ve had a lot on my mind!” Marinette says.

“This is so romantic!” Rose squeals. “He’s your knight in shining leather!”

“Rose!” Marinette wails. Evil, the lot of them, and she’s so not talking to her classmates ever again.

“What happened to your massive crush on Adrien?” Ivan says. Adrien throws his hands in the air.

“Could everyone else see it?” he cries.

“Yes,” choruses the entire class minus Lila and Chloé.

“Sorry, dude, you’re just dense as hell,” Nino says.

“Don’t make me revoke our bro-marriage,” Adrien threatens, and Nino’s eyes widen.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.”

“It’s still there,” Marinette says in answer to Ivan’s question while Adrien and Nino hash out their little bro-fight. “Adrien was my first real crush and I think there’ll always be something there, but…it’s manageable now, you know?”

“This is the most disgusting sap I’ve ever heard,” Chloé says but without any malice in her voice, which is about as close to supportive as Chloé Bourgeois will probably ever get.

“Honestly, same,” Adrien says. When had he sorted out his bro issues with Nino? “I’ll always love Ladybug, and she’ll probably always be on this “freebie list” that everyone keeps talking about, but now…well, I think I realised it’d never happen.”

“Raise your hand if you’re in any way surprised to hear that Adrien was crushing on Ladybug,” Nathaniel says. If Adrien hadn’t told her so that one morning, Marinette would have been the only person in the class to raise her hand.

“I mean, you’re Adrien Agreste, so she probably would’ve tapped that,” Alix says.

“Alix!” Marinette and Adrien splutter. Alix shrugs.

“What? I’m just telling the truth. Literally everyone here’s been into Ladybug at some point. Nathaniel still draws gooey comics about Super Nathan and Ladybug.”

“Alix, I swear to god, I will stab you in the neck with this pencil,” Nathaniel says.

“Bring it on, tomato head,” Alix grins.

“Aren’t you aroace, though?” Mylène says.

“So?” Alix says. “She’s Ladybug. And I’m not totally aro when it comes to girls.”

“Yeah, which means all you bitches have to get in line behind me,” Chloé says.

“How about you go fuck yourself, Bourgeois?” Alix calls back down at her.

“Eat my entire arse, Kubdel.”

“Yeah, I’m sure this is exactly what we meant by being a good person,” Marinette jokes, seizing the change in subject with both hands like a lifeline so that she doesn’t have to keep hearing about how her classmates would do her alter ego.

“I’m becoming a better person, not turning into a saint, Dupain-Cheng.”

The classroom banter is interrupted by Ms Bustier finally entering the classroom, twenty minutes late. Everyone immediately shuts up and directs their attention to the front, no doubt remembering the events of yesterday after her akumatisation into Zombizou.

“Apologies for my tardiness, class,” Ms Bustier says with her usual smile, although there’s something a little strained about it if one looks too closely.

“Are you okay, Ms Bustier?” Max says. Marinette honestly resents him a little for having been able to largely avoid the classroom drama that had gone on just moments before with whatever device he was tinkering with.

“I’m fantastic, Max!” Ms Bustier beams. “What would make you think otherwise?”

Everyone looks around at each other, seeming to come to an unspoken agreement.

“That’s it,” Mylène says.

“Self-care time!” Rose says.

“Yay, meditation!” Kim adds as they all swarm around Ms Bustier. Even Chloé and Sabrina join them.

“You just want to fall asleep and not get in trouble for it,” Max scoffs. He visibly gulps when Kim sticks his tongue out and elbows him.

“Oh – class – I don’t –”

“You’ve done so much for us, Ms Bustier,” Lila says. “Even me, and I’ve only been here for a few months. Let us take care of you for a bit!”

Ms Bustier’s eyes fill with tears when she takes in her swarmed students. “You’re the best class I could have ever asked for,” she says shakily.

“You’re the best teacher we could’ve asked for,” Marinette says. Ms Bustier’s smile dims a little.

“That’s not quite true,” she says. “I was unfair to you yesterday, Marinette. I put the responsibility of being the better person on the one harmed instead of the one doing the harm, and I wouldn’t have forgiven myself if you had been akumatised because of me.”

“Wait, that akuma was for Marinette?” Juleka gasps. “But Marinette never gets akumatised!”

“And you took it for her?” Nino says. “Dude, you really are the best!”

“Thanks for your apology, Ms Bustier,” Marinette says. Honestly, having someone actually stop and take a minute to see just why she had been so frustrated shouldn’t be such a surprise, but that’s probably what happens after years of her bully bribing and pushing everyone around while the adults look the other way. “And Nino’s right: you really are the best teacher! If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have apologised just now.”

Ms Bustier’s smile this time as she wipes her eyes is one hundred percent genuine. “Thank you, Marinette. That means a lot.”

“I mean, I suppose I can arrange a spa session for you this weekend as a late birthday gift,” Chloé says, tapping away on her phone. “Even teachers need breaks too, I guess.”

“That’s…very nice of you, Chloé,” Ms Bustier says with a proud little smile. Chloé shrugs.

“What can I say? I’m the new Mother Teresa.”

“You do know that Mother Teresa provided subpar care to her patients, managed her charity funds rather suspiciously, and forced her colonialism on her patients to make them convert to Catholicism, right?” Max says.

“Hey, I guess Chloé’s just got really good self-awareness,” Alix grins. Chloé rolls her eyes.

“I repeat: eat my arse, Kubdel.”

“Make me, Bourgeois.”

“If this turns out to be the new Adrienette of the class, I swear to god,” Alya mutters.

“Wait, the new what?” Marinette and Adrien exclaim.

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