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greatpositive · 9 years ago

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It’s Time to Drop the Act (Tweet Chat Recap)

We’ve all put up an act in at least one point in our life because sometimes it’s just easier to fit in and avoid conflict; in many cases it’s what you just grow accustomed to doing as you grow up. It’s easy to fall into the pressures of family, community, relationships, school and work. However, putting up a façade can be both physically and mentally harmful.

GreatPositive was honored to have Beth Thomas Cohen guest host our Tweet Chat #GreatPositiveChat to discuss the implications of not being yourself and how to #DropTheAct.

Beth Thomas Cohen draws her experience from being in the fashion industry for sixteen years and as a biracial woman, mother and wife working full-time. As cofounder of the public relations agency B' squared Public Relations, Beth launched new fashion brands and breathed life into older ones. She previously worked as senior director at Lividini & Co., in-house public relations director at the luxury/accessories company Lambertson Truex, and worked in the fashion department at O, The Oprah Magazine. She lives in New Jersey with her husband and children.

Below is a recap of the Q&A tweet chat we held with Beth that reached over 190,000 people on Twitter.

Do you ever put up an act or know someone who does? How does it make you feel?

”I don't think anyone should play a role unless you are getting PAID!!!” - Beth Thomas Cohen

The common consensus among participants was that people put up an act because of societal pressures, often finding comfort in numbers and familiarity and forgetting who they really are or want to be. There are stereotypes that we are fighting everyday and images we mistakenly try to live up to. Without admitting it, it bothers most of us that we have to play a certain role everyday. Unfortunately, the façade becomes reality all too often and at some point hiding behind "things" gets exhausting!

One of our participants even shared with us that she used to put up an act when she was younger, but as she got older and wiser she realized that her true friends and family accept her for who she really is. She learned the hard way and realized that one can only put on a façade for so long. It never works nor is it beneficial. With this knowledge, she now mentors teenage girls to help them embrace their true selves.

Why do you think people, women especially, feel the need to put up an act?

“We’re afraid of the truth, afraid of going against the grain and afraid of being the oddity when in fact it's quite liberating!” – Beth Thomas Cohen

There are a numerous amount of reasons why women especially put up an act, but society and media definitely play a big role. Women feel the pressures to conform based on how they think they should be viewed as. For instance, you don't want to be labeled as too sensitive, so you put up an act to appear stronger. And when you do hide your feelings to get ahead, you can get labeled as “hard.” It’s a never-ending cycle that just needs to stop.

But at the end of the day human race is the same. Gender doesn’t matter – it’s mostly about wants, desires and greed. People put up an act to get ahead in business, relationships and friendships.

And most of the time, the need and want to put up an act or not put up an act starts in the home – this is where you first learn about values, how to form bonds, and how to manage relationships.

Communities also play a big role in shaping this mentality, especially in smaller communities where “clicks” and the pressure to fit in are more prevalent.

It can be exhausting to put up an act with friends, your spouse, family and coworkers. How do we #DropTheAct?

“If I die tomorrow, I have 0 regrets. I have said all I needed to say to the people who matter to me and eliminated the rest” – Beth Thomas Cohen

Can you confidently say the same for yourself? Below are some advice by participants on how to #DropTheAct:

We need more encouraging campaigns to embrace individuality.

Learning to and loving your TRUE self is the best gift to yourself! You begin to want and only expect the best for you.

Self-esteem has a lot to do with everything in how you lead your life!

Appreciate your own differences and the differences in others.

Be sensitive to everyone's situations. You never know what they may be going through. DO NOT JUDGE! That HAS to stop!

"You can't judge a book by its cover!" Old adage that still works!

Like everything else in life it takes time, but know that it feels great to stop the bullshit!

Take it one step at a time. First try it with your best friend and then try a co-worker and so on. It'll get easier to #DropTheAct over time.

Be honest with each other. This can be hard, but it works.

Pick up Beth’s book, “Drop the Act, It’s Exhausting.”

Improving the world takes collaboration. How can we all help to further the cause?

@BethThomasCohen

Begin by loving and accepting EVERYONE for who they are not what they are!

Stop hiding behind your labels, $ and materialistic things and start focusing on the more important things in life!

We think we have come so far, but in actuality we really haven't..I talk about that quite a lot in the book.

A lot of the change starts in the home.

Women lifting other women, putting down the mask, loving people for who they are not what they are or have!

I thank EVERYONE who reads the book, it was so important to me for so many years to get this message out...

@CLuong708

Perhaps, turning to your friend, loved one or coworker and letting them know it's okay to be 100% real to you?

@WunderDanielle

Start simply. Be a better person to the people around you and the positivity will spread

@whoisjenp

We can't save them all, the boat just isn't big enough! I believe in the old saying of "if I can just change one," and then that one commits to changing someone else ... so on and so forth ... working together to change one and spread!

@BGUnscripted

By putting differences aside and helping others. STOP looking at what others have.

@WunderJuliette

If we support others in dropping the act, we can make our community more comfortable with being themselves.

Thank you for reading through the recap of our “Drop the Act, Ladies. Be Empowered. Be You” tweet chat. Please email us at [email protected] if you have any suggestions on a topic or a guest host.

Missed our last two tweet chats? Read the recaps here:

Breast Cancer Tweet Chat with Guest Host Donna Deegan

Positive Thinking Day Tweet Chat with Guest Host Michael Chatman

#greatpositivechat #twitter #droptheact #girlpower #beyou #confidence #selfesteem #womenempowerment #femaleempowerment #empowerment

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greatpositive · 9 years ago

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7 Highlights: GreatPositive’s Inaugural Tweet Chat on Positive Thinking Day

GreatPositive successfully hosted its inaugural tweet chat on Positive Thinking Day, September 13, 2015, and we are so inspired with the conversations that took place. In case you missed it, here are the key highlights and learnings:

Highlight #1: We couldn’t have done it without the help of like-minded people!

Michael Chatman (@michaelchatman), America’s leading connector, navigator and broker in the field of philanthropy, kindly took time out on a Sunday evening to be a guest host on our chat.

Michael’s participation was truly appreciated and didn’t go unrecognized:

We also had an amazing diverse group of positive thinkers who attended the chat, ranging from nonprofit fundraisers to ministry leaders, volunteers and donor advisors.

Overall participation

Thanks to 300 contributors that collectively shared 868 tweets, we were able to reach 902,606 people!

Of those tweets, 12.1% were original tweets, 71.3% were retweets, and 16.6% consisted of conversations that took place between people. We hope to see an increase in the amount of original tweets and @ mentions next time. Your thoughts matter a lot and can make a real impact!

Highlight #2: Positivity is most associated with smiling, energy and the act of donating.

Based on the 4 questions we asked throughout the chat, we were able to see a trend in the words that were most used within the answers. We couldn’t help but SMILE. :)

Highlight #3: Smile showed up a lot in the answers because we skewed the conversation.

The findings to Highlight #2 were a bit skewed because of the first question we asked to jumpstart the tweet chat. We wanted to begin the conversation in a positive light by encouraging people to think about what makes them smile -- a universal language.

Highlight #4: People and acts of kindness are the main motivators for making people smile. And for some, simply life and nature make them smile.

It was so invigorating to hear about the different things that make others smile. A great reminder to not take certain aspects of life and the world for granted.

Highlight #5: As expected, we received a myriad of answers about how people give back, but surprisingly only one person mentioned donating.

Understandably, many want to stay humble when it comes to donating money, but it’s okay to talk about it if it helps bring further support for the cause that you care about. We know you donate because statistics show that over 50% of the U.S. population donate and an estimated $358.38 billion total was donated to charity in 2014 (according to the Giving USA report). Globally, 1.4 billion people donate, which makes up over 25% of the world’s population (according to the World Giving Index report).

Highlight #6: We asked what advice others had to give to amplify giving and the answers were split down the middle between tangible and intangible advice.

Tangible

Intangible

Highlight #7: It can be very uncomfortable and difficult to ask for help, but our participants graciously shared some ways we can all help. Majority of the asks were general asks, but a few asked for specific help. Please lend a hand if you can.

General Asks

Specific Asks

An offer to help

September 13, 2015 marked GreatPositive’s inaugural “Positive Thinking Day” tweet chat, but we also look forward to hosting tweet chats around specific causes on a monthly basis. Email us if you have any topic suggestions and if you want to be a guest host.

See you on October 28, 2015 for our next tweet chat on “Breast Cancer Awareness & Empowerment,” featuring guest host Donna Deegan (@donnageegan), three-time breast cancer survivor and the founder of 26.2 with Donna and The Donna Foundation. #GreatPositiveChat

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