#grandmas here to sass with you ay

[the-ce-horniest-book-club]

Last Chance Prompt Fest

Today is the day that our Last Chance Prompt Fest starts.

To take part, you don’t need to claim a prompt through us at all, you just find a prompt you like, create what you want to create and then tag us @the-ce-horniest-book-club​ and use the hashtag “CE HBC Last Chance Prompt Fest”. You can also DM your link to us to ensure we see it.

The event starts today, Friday, August 27th and ends next Friday, September 3, 2021.

Once the event has ended, we will answer the ask for the prompts that received creations. We will also have a masterlist for everything created as well.

Who can we create for?

You can create stuff for Steve Rogers, Chris Evans or any of Chris’s 18+ characters.

What can we create?

While the CE HBC is primarily a writing community, these events are to encourage creators of all types. So for this event, you can write, make moodboards, create a playlist, make a video or whatever you are inspired to create based on the prompts under the keep reading.

All of the prompts are listed below the cut and it does not matter how many things are created for each prompt.

Chris Evans Prompts

Could you do one with chris where the reader is eating something delicious and Chris hears them and tries to distract them with smutty things but the reader picks the treat over Chris. (Just had yams that tasted like my grandma used to make years ago, and I’ll pick that over Chris right now lol)

It’s hot AF where I live and we all know Chris doesn’t like the hot temps… so maybe something about trying to beat the heat

How many rounds was that? Four? God, we’re about to break our own record. With Chris? 😍

That’s a lot of sass for someone who ruined my sheets and still hasn’t apologized. With Chris?

Prompt: being friends with Chris and helping and supporting him with ASP too. When the news hit that Biden won your together and after squealing, he just grabs and kisses you.

Chris Evans brushing his heavily pregnant wife’s hair

Chris introducing you to his family for the first time

Readers reaction when Chris has to shave off his beard for a role and doesn’t tell her?

Hey i had an idea. she faked her orgasm because she has trouble cum.  Chris finds out and is angry because she hasn’t said anything and doubts his abilities?  then he brings her to orgasm

Chris playing Christmas songs on the piano while you wrap presents or something where he keeps you company while you’re doing something else

Ari Levinson Prompts

Cowboy Ari Levinson helping you out after he finds you on his ranch

Curtis Everett Prompts

Trying to have quiet sex with Curtis behind a curtain.

Frank Adler Prompts

Frank Adler gets a new neighbor - reader who is just as intelligent as his family and they like each other right away.

Nick Vaughn Prompts

Nick Vaughan keeping you company on the streets of New York

Steve Rogers Prompts

“I’m your Captain and you follow my orders!” “Aye, aye Cap’n!” “I said Captain, not pirate.”

“Hey Steve, what does a deaf gynecologist do?” “I don’t know.” “He reads lips.”

How about a drunk drabble based off of Right Girl Wrong Time by Jon Langston with Steve and Peggy

someone should write a steve and bucky threesome with a reader

“Yeah sex is great but have you just ever wanted to rub yourself over that fucking beard of Steve’s?”

I have a prompt for you. Steve has fallen in love with the Motown sound since Sam has played most of the genre for him. He has gone shopping, or gone for coffee and he hears you sing a song from the Supremes and is instantly intrigued. Have fun seducing him with music. https://youtu.be/HXGz8i0I2L0

It’s the first Christmas Steve has spent with y/n

Reader making Steve a heart cake for Valentine’s Day ❤️

Multiple Options Prompts

Can I get the following prompt with Steve, Colin, or Jensen? “In ancient Greece, throwing an apple was done to declare one’s love.” “How do I love thee, let me count the ways? Thump, thump, thump.” “So the mild concussion means you love me?”

Could I get “I see that you have your legal name listed as Y/n’s Daddy. That’s incorrect. You’re legal name is what’s on your Drivers Licence.” With any of Chris’ characters please?

SFW Prompts

For Chris or one of his characters, there is only one bed and they got to sleep far apart but wake up cuddling. Bonus points if they don’t hate it.

��Just tell why you did it!” “Because I’m in love with you, okay?!”

How about they’re roommates and “just friends” who develop feelings for each other

“You always say that, but I’d only see you for a day or two until you have to fly out again.”

“You don’t have to say anything, if you don’t want. I just thought you should know.”

i have been in love with you, dumbass

“If you don’t hug me right now I think I might fall apart.”

I have these… powers raging around inside me, and I have no clue how to control them.

“Hey, it’s cold. Light a fire or something. I swear, you’re a cold blooded reptile.”

that guy in the gorilla costume has been following us for the past ten blocks.

going to a masquerade ball

“So, you’re the unfortunate soul stuck with me.”

“I look at you and I think, ‘sunshine. Literal sunshine.’ It’s annoying.”

“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

“What’s with the box?”

“I’m not jealous.”

“It’s not like I love you or anything.”

Merlin quote prompt: Nobility is defined by what you do, not by who you are

“Why do you keep pushing me away? I know you love me.”

“I want to go home.” “And I want to go to the moon. It ain’t happening sweetheart. Time to accept that.”

“I just want you to know I love you and I hope these roses prove that to you.”

Prompt: “if you steal all the blankets I’m going to put my cold feet on you.”

“What have we here? Bed: unslept in. Hair in… missionary disarray. And yesterday’s dress with today’s shame all over it.” Gossip Girl

Every time I’m in the same room with her, I can’t decide if I want to pick a fight with her or push her up against a wall and kiss the fuck out of her. - Falling for My Enemy by Claire Kingsley

“The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.”

NSFW Prompts

“Wet pussy is the best. I can’t get enough of the juices dripping from my mouth.”

“She beauty, she grace, I want her pussy on my face.”

“Sheathing my cock inside you feels like a jam donut being torn in half. Delicious and mind blowing.”

Twist on quarantine haircuts: couple helping each other with pubic hair maintenance

“I don’t know if you’re looking for Aztek gold down there, but if you don’t hurry up and fuck my brains out I’ll do it my damn self!”

“Have you ever noticed how eating a hot dog is similar to giving deepthroat?” “No but thanks, I don’t want to eat this now.”

Babe I can’t sleep. I know you just woke me up. Wanna fuck? I’m awake!!!

“I don’t know who you think you’re talking to but I’m about to punish that sassy mouth!”

“I love your longish hair baby. Finally got something to pull while you’re between my legs devouring me.”

Holiday Prompts

“Great, now I have to re-hide your Christmas gifts.”

“I’m not going to kiss you under the mistletoe.”

“The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”

“What are you doing?” “Hiding from carolers.”

“Santa’s handwriting looks suspiciously like yours.”

“Why does the house smell like a cinnamon roll threw up?”

“Are you Santa? Because I’d sit on your lap.”

“YES I BOOBY TRAPPED THE PRESENTS BECAUSE YOU DO THIS EVERY FUCKING YEAR”

“What the hell kind of Charlie Brown Christmas tree did you buy?”

“It looks like the North Pole threw up.”

i may or may not have gotten tangled up in the tinsel.

“If we don’t have this damn tree up before the end of the night, I’m going to kill you.”

“I’m going to tell Santa to give you coal.”

“It’s an advent calendar. You’re supposed to open one square a day, not eat half the chocolate in a sitting.”

“Why is there mistletoe in every room of the apartment?”

I got a little too drunk off of egg nog and vodka and you look so pretty in this light, and I most definitely want to kiss you right now, best friends or not.

we were going to a Christmas party but fuck if you don’t just look sinful in red, and you know what? Fuck that Christmas party.

Dad!chris (or one of his characters) and his kids at Christmas

“You’ve never had a New Year’s kiss?”

Spending your first Valentine’s Day together with any character

[devouringhope-blog]

begrimedchains replied to your post: grandma’s back to sass 

Aw shit.

‘Don’cha seem happy t’ see me.’

[fightevilandthengetblownup]

FIC: The Club

---

"Okay, okay, order guys," The calm, but perky, voice called out over the muffled din of so many voices bouncing off one another and talking over each other as if carried on an unrelenting river down the rapids. The blonde, shorter than most assembled around the large circular table but older or at the least wiser-seeming, stood from her seat as if to call order to them all. "Hey, thanks if we can settle down and get on with our purpose of being here… I'm sure we've all got things we'd much rather be doing-"

"My husband, for me," The willowy, inhumanly perfect looking brunette sassed out, one brow raised over her bright yellow eyes. "I don't know if you ladies get the same enjoyment, but I would quite like to get back home."

"Oh lah-dee-dah," The youngest blonde around the table snapped out, crystal blue eyes surrounded by dark circles snapped as she glared across at the other woman. "Just cause your world means a husband and no end-of-the-world apocalypses like some of us-"

"Sweetheart, please, no one's going to your world isn't bad if it's really like that." The blonde sitting next to Julie Grigio sighed softly, her fae-like features in her puckish lips shining through as she smiled gently at the younger girl. Her tooth-gaped smile hiding the exasperation at being surrounded by so many unable to keep their internal-voices as quiet as they were on the outside. Sookie Stackhouse placed a gentle hand on the girl next to her's hand before flinching back feeling the gap where a finger should have been. "Oh!"

"Yeah, fucking oh." Julie mocked, teeth gritted and an angry snarl to her lips as she jerked her hand back and slumped into her chair, the flash of anger dying out as quickly as it came to the depressive thoughts she really did have the worst life. "Let's just… get on with the point of this."

"Yes, exactly!" The first blonde spoke up again, clapping her hands together. Buffy Summers wasn't one to let the mood drop for long if she could help it. And being the eldest, she figured that keeping things on track was likely her task. "We're here cause, um-" She trailed off at that point, the actual purpose of this round table foggy for her.

It was the same for all those gathered there. They'd all been in their respective worlds one moment, and then things got cloudy and they were suddenly at this table. Some of them could recognise others - the various works that others came from familiar and fictional in their realities - while others had complete confusion.

Sookie Stackhouse had been cooking breakfast for her husband and children in her Grandma's house - calling out to her husband to fix the dang chicken coop - when she felt the fuzzy feeling she used to only get when moving to the fairy realm.

Bela Swann-Cullen had been about to go visit her friend Jacob, running through the woods without a care in the world as Edward took their daughter to see her dad, and then she took another powerful step and found herself seated at the table.

Buffy Summers was, of course, far too familiar with the effect of magic. She'd taken it in stride opening one door and finding herself at a strange table with an array of strange women.

Beside her was a dark haired, mousy looking lady who looked well loved and well and truly confused as she looked about at them all - eyes wide and frightened as she jerked her hands about to sign something. Not that anyone really had noticed her yet.

The youngest one was Julie Grigio, sat between Sookie and the dark-haired mute, and the extremely volatile emotions and reactions thus far were half out of annoyance at all the upbeat personalities and half out of fear of being in an unknown room she didn't know how to escape from. R had just said he'd finished making their breakfast and had been calling her down to get started on another hard day of travelling to reach out to those people that were not too far gone when she'd left the bedroom and found herself here.

Another dark haired girl at the table, sat beside her fellow vampire, was Elena Gilbert. Crazy had been her life for years, so she was taking the whole situation in stride and focused more upon the other vampire beside her who seemed less prepared for the unexpected than she was.

"Because - we're here as a joke," the lone blonde yet to speak said, her worn cowboy boots kicked up on the table at odds with the buttercup yellow sundress she wore but in keeping with the equally worn denim jacket she had on over the top. Jo Harvelle rolled her eyes as she looked around the assembled table with a sigh. "Y'all really haven't been made aware of your relevancy to that other world have you?"

"Huh?" Elena asked, tilting her head. "What other-"

"Oh god, this isn't one of those crossovers is it?" Buffy cut over the vampiric girl with a groan, slumping back down into her seat and rubbing at her temples. "Okay, if that's the case, we better work out what our crossover is for and complete the task so we can all get on home before this turns into a-" She shuddered, "- musical."

"Hey, I liked the musical episode," Bela chimed in, recognising the 90's heroine from her own world.

"Me too," Elena added with a smile, before exchanging a grin with the vampire beside her. "Bela, right?"

"Yeah, and you're...Elena?"

"Yup!"

"Okay cool, we at least recognise each other and Buffy over there."

"I recognise her too," Sookie chimed in, followed quickly by Julie nodding her head and pointing at the Slayer.

"Me too."

"Okay, what, am I famous in all your world's for something?" Buffy frowned, sitting up a little straighter and looking about the table at the nods from all but the silent, dark-haired woman. "Who are you?"

The mute paused for a second, doe-eyed and obviously frightened for a moment before she started signing away. The communal looks of confusion started until Sookie chimed up, "Oh! Her name is… Eliza? And she's from… Baltimore? In 1962?!"

"Yippee, time travel," Elena said, rolling her eyes to herself before starting at the confused looks she was getting. "Sorry. Dopplegangers and a lot of confusing time stuff."

"I had the same with the fairy realm so that's understandable," Sookie replied sympathetically, before going back to translating Eliza's thoughts and signing through that for them all. "She does not recognise any of us, and just… wants to go back to the water?"

There was a pause before the blonde hunter leaped to her feet, clapping her hands. "Oh fuckin' hell! It's the amphibian-girl!"

"What?"

"Who?"

"Do you recognise her?"

Jo clapped her hands again before looking around the table for a moment and then letting out a loud laugh. "Oh my fuckin' God - it's the monster fuckin' club!"

There was another, longer and clearly more drawn out pause of silence, before the rest clamoured all at once to question what on earth she was on about.

"No, no, I know what this is. This is totally Monster Fucking Club," Jo said with a definitive nod before pointing a hand straight across the table at Buffy. "I'm pretty sure I know how everyone here is, and I can prove that's what this is about. You're Buffy Summers-"

"Yes…?"

"And you've fucked at least two vampires, and definitely loved two of them, let alone any other non-humans - I'm sorry, it got so convoluted after Angel left for his own show."

Buffy turned bright red as she faced down the words before blinking in surprise at the other blonde's claim. "Umm…"

"That's true-"

"Yeah. You totally did."

"I mean it is definitely fair."

All three of the other vampire-partnered women spoke up, nodding their heads supportively before blinking in surprise at one another.

"Ah yes, I'm guessin' only the Southern Belle doesn't recognise you other two, hmm?" Jo chimed in as the two brunette vampires and the blonde half-fae looked curiously at one another. "So the pale one with the yellow eyes is Bela Swann, though given you've got the whole...unearthly glow going on I'm guessin' you're married?"

"Yes," Bela replied nodding. "And yes, I confirm that I do indeed sleep with my vampire husband."

"I'm Elena Gilbert," the other dark haired vampire said, smiling gently around the table but only unable to meet the eye of the very sour blonde across from her. Elena shrugged a shoulder. "I've...also slept with a few vampires."

"I've only one-" Bela cut in, frowning. "So your theory of it being-"

"Bela, it doesn't matter the numbers. You fuck someone inhuman - you're a monster-fucker." Jo shook her head towards the younger woman's attempt to exclude herself from the group before turning to look at the other blonde closest to her age. "Sookie Stackhouse - half-fairy, vampire-magnet and lover, right?"

"I mean, I prefer the idea of bein' seen as an empath instead of fae-"

"Fair. Fairies are bitches."

"Hey!"

There was a momentary squabble before Buffy banged her hand on the table shutting up her fellow blondes, eyes fixed on the one that had been holding court for a few moments there. "Alright then, you've been able to say a few of us - but what did you mean by amphibian-girl about Eliza here? And who are you and our other friend-"

"My name is Julie," the youngest blonde growled out, glaring towards the other women as she crossed her arms.

"Yes, what about Julie and yourself?"

"Okay, okay, first things first," Jo said with a sigh, holding up a hand with one finger up, "Eliza over there is in love with an amphibious man kinda like the creature from the Black Lagoon...except that he fucks. And well, I suspect, aye Lizzie?" She waggled an eyebrow looking over at the dark haired woman with a smirk.

Eliza blushed deeply for a moment, her hands flapping about as if trying to decide what to say before holding her hands tightly in her lap and nodding her head rapidly.

Jo smirked, giving a supportive nod, before holding up another finger. "Secondly, I'm Jo Harvelle. Hunter extraordinaire and I'm definitely a member of this club given. And thirdly-"

"How are you a member though?" Bela chimed in, eyes sharply focused on her as Jo glanced back across. "So far you've said vampires for all of use except for Eliza. So...you sleep with vampires too?"

"Fuckin' god no, ugh!" Jo shook her head with a disgusted look before shrugging her shoulder. "My darlin' hunny is a shadow monster. Kinda like a vampire but energy and no blood, and also fuckin' sexier than bein' a fang-banger."

"Hey!" Sookie scowled, arms crossed under her white Merlotte's shirt she was wearing having been meaning to go straight to work after feeding her family. "That's a filthy name to be callin' us-"

"Oh is that mean in your world?" Elena asked, head tilted curiously until Sookie nodded back at her.

"Anyways," Jo said, rolling her eyes and pointing at herself with her two fingers. "Point is, certified monster fucker here too. And then," she holds up a third finger before pointing her hand towards the remaining blonde. "She's Julie Grigio, right?"

"Yeah…" Julie grumbled the word out, looking warily at the other before noticing the amount of scars littering the older blonde's body how none of the other women had that pointed her out for a kindred spirit. "So? You gonna share my backstory now, huh?"

"Well, if you're not." Jo shrugged before sighing gently noticing the missing finger. "She's from an apocalyptic zombie-infested world. Her lover is a sentient zombie who's definitely working towards saving the world, or may have by now."

"Thanks-"

"You two are so cute and deserve better than that."

"Yeah, well, we don't all get to live happy lives with husbands and happiness and whatever else where bad things don't happen."

“True, but myself and Buffy over there have had our fair share of Shit Happens, so you’ve got some company here, Jules,” The hunter said with a comforting smile, ignoring the squawked objections from the two vampires and the half-fae that their worlds were equally so bad. It was fair to object, but crazed virus infected vampires that weren’t exactly dangerous any more wasn’t the same as world-wide zombie plague nor the actual biblical apocalypse like the hunter or Slayer had experienced. Let alone the potential, far less world-threatening issues the other two had experienced. “Anyways, I know you say that - but you and your super cute ex-zombie boyfriend aren’t living that bad a life now that you’re curin’ the world as it is.”

Julie had the decency to blush, even though she moved her hands both to the table and rubbed over the missing space on the one hand as message enough that her point still stood.

“Okay, well, I guess we’ve established that the connection between us all is,” Buffy quickly cut in, clapping her hands and standing up again as she looked around at the group of women. “But that doesn’t help us work out exactly what the purpose of us being together is for. What problem it is we’ve been brought to tackle.”

“Eliza was wondering if it was about humanity and.. Monsters?” Sookie chimed up after a beat of silence, eyes fixed on the dark-haired woman who was moving her hands rapidly before touching her neck. “Oh! Because so many of us are not… no longer humans? I mean, I was born what I was, and I’d always thought I was human, and- oh, same for Eliza over there.”

There was a pause as the dark-haired woman seemed to think carefully before she began miming something else, and all eyes were on her even as the blonde empath spoke for her instead. “She was never sure what was wrong with her, or if she’d always been meant to be in the water like her man is, but she never felt that humanity and being human was what her life should or would have been.” There was another pause as she gestured to the marks to the side of her neck and then around the air. “She could live outside the water, of course, but it’s a silent world up here for her.”

“I am what I am because of an ancient mystical curse or blessing, depending how you look at it.” Buffy added, shrugging a shoulder as she seemed to consider that as an option. “I mean, you could say because of my metahuman skills from being a Slayer that I may not be so considered a human any more-”

“I’m a flat out vampire now, not that I really… That is to say, I didn’t really want to be.” Elena spoke up quietly, looking at the table top rather than meeting anyone’s eye. “It was a mistake really. And especially for Damon to have been the one to sire me-”

“Ugh, why did you go for the dickhead brother? Worst. Decision. Ever.” “What the hell do you know about that, hunter-girl?” “Easy - always go for the nice one, far less dangerous a life choice.”

“Anyway,” Elena glared across at the older hunter at that point, looking up from the table and more confident as she spoke in that moment then. “If I had had the choice, I’m not sure I would have decided to become a vampire so… Does that not wanting to change from human factor in for anyone else?”

“Why would you not want to be a vampire?!” Bela’s eyes were wide and disbelieving as she looked at the girl next to her in confusion. “I mean, I had to get married to make my husband agree to turn me. And even then, he tried to talk me out of it for years. Why wouldn’t you want to have forever with your love?”

Sookie coughed softly and seemed to wipe at her eyes for a moment before speaking up softly. “Because, sometimes there are costs for being what you are that you can never make up for. I… I considered becoming a fairy-vampire with Warlow before I realised how evil and crazed he was. And then Bill was all messed up by Lilith, and Eric was dying from the virus and-” The blonde sucked in a quick, harsh series of breaths before shaking her head and the perpetually sunshine-like smile came back across her face. “Sometimes not becoming something you think you should works out. I’d have never had my loving human husband and kids if I had turned myself.”

“And I’d have died giving birth to my daughter if I hadn’t been turned,” Bela shot back, raising a brow with an arch look to her face. “We all have different experiences, you know.”

“Well, unlike the fucking rest of you-” Julie cut in with a sneer, crossing her arms under her chest as she looked around the table.”-Aint nobody want to be inhuman in my world. Though that doesn’t stop a whole damn lot of people from trying to be. The apathy for other beings is disgusting, and the treatment of not just the bonies and the fleshies, but other humans. Everything is corrupted, the world is dead and I mean the soul of the world is dead. Human or not - everything is missing that piece these days.”

There was another silence around the table at that declaration, each other woman catching one another’s eye before dropping it again at the feelings such a declaration brought up. A world, devoid of goodness that was still fighting for love, felt like such a far step away from the dramas of vampires and werewolves squabbling for land or acceptance in mainstream society.

Only Jo seemed to nod in agreement and understanding, speaking quietly, “Some of y’all ain’t seen how a real apocalypse works. The spread of pestilence and war ravaging the lands, death everywhere. Experiencing death first hand for real, the gritty horrible pain of bleedin’ out and knowin’ you aint got a damn thing to give for the world but what little you have left of yourself-” She looked straight across at the nodding younger blonde, and stared down each of the two vampires as they looked set to disagree about not having experienced a real death, before she found herself staring down the Slayer looking back at her. “I mean, I know Buffy over there has given the big sacrifices before, but even then your world wasn’t quite so...decimated as some others. Julie’s got zombies running wild, Sook had quite a 28 Days Later type situation goin’ on, and I fought one of the legit horsemen of the Apocalypse. So, it’s a bit grander than the family dramas and scheming military folks these other three had on their hands.”

“And nobody wants to be a zombie.” Julie added snappily to the end of the other’s speech, raising a brow. “Not even R wants to be one.”

“Sounds like my hunny, he wishes he could be a human too.”

Elena was the next one to speak up, her voice soft and uncertain but also clear and more like she was sharing a thought she was still formulating. “Maybe… maybe that is the point? That we’re all, um, well, what Jo called us-”

“Monster fuckers.”

“Yes, that,” Elena continued, a faint blush on her cheeks as she looked about the table. “We might all be that, but I know that, well, at least Stefan-”

“The best of your lover boys.” “Fair call, truth.” “Thanks, Bela.”

“Jo and Bela, can we let Elena finish talking for once?” Buffy cut in sharply with a reprimanding look at the two women that were sat beside one another, before looking around the rest of the table as if to confirm they all agreed to let the young vampire finish her thought process. “Okay, back to you Elena.”

“Um, thank you. But what I was saying,” Her voice got louder then and more bold, clearly not sure she would get to actually finish what she was saying without interruption if she didn’t speak up more. “-is that it seems like while we might all be monster-fuckers, none of the monsters that we love want to be one. I know Stefan regrets losing his human life, and sometimes Damon does too.”

“Edward literally tried to kill himself so I wouldn’t be tempted to become like him,” Bela added herself, looking thoughtful. “He believes he has no soul and he regrets being turned and not left to die as a human with his human mother. He regrets what I have become, given he’s such a silly religious type.”

“Bill was like that too,” Sookie spoke up next, nodding her head in agreement to Bela’s words. “He hated what he was made into, and if he could’ve been human he would be. I… I sometimes think even Eric would too,” At that she seemed to start fiddling with her wedding ring and unable to meet any watching eyes around the table. “So, so many of the vampires, and even the other half-faes I met wish we weren’t how we are - missing the humanity and the...carefree way being a human is.”

“Like I said - ain’t nobody want to be a fucking zombie.” Julie growled the words out, lifting a hand to rub at her neck with a sigh. “R has fought every piece of him to become a human again and return to the living. He’s fighting for everyone to have that back, in a way that nobody else could have if they didn’t have his conviction.”

Beside the feisty youngest blonde, Eliza bobbed her head one way then another - seemingly tossing up the idea to herself of her wondrous partner wanting to be any other way than the way he was and the way she was; but ended up shrugging a shoulder uncertainly. Perhaps he would if the idea of humanity and how humans lived could be expressed for him, but also being a river god to the humans of his past might be hard to view. But his love for her - the way she intrigued him and fascinated her as much as he did her spoke volumes as well. Maybe he would choose a human life if he’d ever had the option of one.

Buffy herself frowned for a moment before letting out a sharp, bark of a laugh. “Oh this really could be it. Cause if someone like Spike can miss the idea of humanity sometimes, it really must be true for all supernatural beings.” She let out another laugh, rubbing at her elbows for a moment. “Besides, I know Angel wishes he was-” She scowled at the communal sigh that five of the six other women gave at her mentioning the vampire-with-a-soul, eyes flashing dangerously with something she knew she’d have to always keep buried back in her world. “-so this could be it.”

“So we all sleep with monsters, and most of them wish to be human?” Bela said cautiously, looking about the table to see a group of correspondingly agreeing nods. “So...is that why we’re here? To discuss the ethicacy of it?”

"Maybe we're here to talk about how they fuck?" Julie snarked back at the suggestion, a lip curled up, before letting out a laugh as she managed to get a honking, squeak of a laugh from the mute woman beside her. "See? Eliza agrees with me."

"I mean, it'd be a fun topic!" Bela agreed with a laugh, her own mouth twisting into a pretty smile - pretty because that was the point of vampires in her world. "I know I've broken a few beds-"

"That's cute. Destroy a house." Buffy chimed in, sitting back in her own chair before turning slightly pink as all eyes focused on her. "I was just..saying."

"You're saying the Spike fucks, we know, your life is a TV show in our worlds." Elena replied, smiling sweetly at the blushing Slayer, before adding for herself. "I mean, it could be that, but given most of us are only vampires-"

"And a fairy-vampire. And a werewolf. And a shape shifter." Sookie added, before going bright red herself at the gaping looks she received from them all. "What?"

"Oh my god - Sookie is the queen of the monster-fuckers!" Julie cried out, pointing at her fellow blonde with a wicked grin. "We must be here to work out who the biggest one is - and it is totally Sookie! Unless any of you beat, what, four different monster types?"

"I'm only at two," Jo supplied, before the rest shrugged and confirmed they were all single-type girls themselves. "I guess Sookie is the biggest monster-fucker here!"

"Oh no!"

There was a shake to the room, though only one of them seemed to notice as the group began bickering back and forth as to if that was the purpose of their being gathered. Dark brown eyes darted around watching the way the edges of the room they were in, which had once been white began to tint a darker and darker color. Like the light in the room was dimming without anyone having done anything. No one else seemed to be reacting, as the women from all the various media she consumed and connected to in their passions continued to argue. Their voices were blurring together as much as the edges of the room were blurring into dark shadows, and looking about, Jo gave a laugh to herself as she finally worked out what they were there for.

“Oh, this is such a stupid dream.” She growled the words out, eyes fixated on the encroaching shadows as the rest of the women continued to talk without any input from her.

Of course it was a dream. It was her damn subconscious mind thinking on her love’s guilt and her own desires - drawing on them to form some stupid summoning of those she’s read or watched in similar yet equally doomed eventually cases. Sookie with her blurry husband that didn’t matter, Julie with her love trying so hard to better himself, Eliza with her running off to live in the monster’s world and abandoning her human life in the pattern, Bela getting the picket fence with every possible good outcome coming her Mary-Sue way, Elena who would end up in a coffin for decades for love, and of course Buffy who was never meant to live past a year defying the odds but giving up love along the way. Of course this is what her brain would come up with.

And letting out a final laugh, Jo finally closed her eyes and waited out the quiet, friendly voices of the women her mind had planted before her to turn into the vicious hisses she knew before gaining full control of herself each morning - happy to forget the sharp points of the dream to the fog of sleep and the mind-bleaching confusion of her paralysis rather than think on it much further.

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