#grand prix at home isu please

[austerlitzborodinoleipzig]

On my knees praying the skating gods so that L/B can qualify with a bronze and a silver

[indefinableship]

“Their steps are intricate and seem effortless. They were 11th at the ISU World Junior Figure Skating Championships in 2004 and in 2005 placed second at the ISU Junior Grand Prix Final. At this championship, they competed on home ice. Please welcome, the silver medalists of the ISU World Junior Figure Skating Championships 2005, Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir.” (x)

[thebookewyrme]

(Part 1)(Part 2)(Part 3) (Read on AO3)

YOI Pride Week Day 4: Grace

Yuuri came back to himself suddenly, flinging himself out of Victor’s arms, heart pounding wildly in his ears. He threw himself into his room, slamming the door against Victor’s startled cries. He braced against it, heaving for breath, thoughts whirling like an out-of-kilter gyroscope. Terror and joy fought for dominance in his throat, forcing tears and shaky sobs out of his mouth.

Who did he think he was, getting so close to Victor so suddenly? But. Victor had kissed him! He was nothing, beneath Victor’s notice, as demonstrated by the Sochi Grand Prix debacle. But Victor asked if Yuuri wanted him! Like he thought the answer might be no! Victor was the five time World Champion, Grand Prix Gold Medalist, Olympic Gold Medalist, and the hottest bachelor in sports! Everyone wanted Victor! Who was Yuuri to think he should be the one to get to keep him? Coaching was one thing, but kissing? Becoming...lovers?

Yuuri blushed. Was it even allowed for a coach and student to date? Wouldn’t the ISU object? Certainly it would be a scandal. People were coached by their relatives all the time, but a lover was different.

Yuuri’s breathing quieted, but his mind continued to whirl in circles around the question of Victor and his own feelings. He felt jittery, needing to move. He paced around his room, met at every turn by the icy gaze of his idol. There was nowhere to hide from Victor’s blue gaze here. In a sudden fit, Yuuri dashed around the room, pulling all the old posters down and hastily stashing them under his bed where the static smile could no longer confront him at every turn. His thoughts shifted instead to the bright, heart-shaped grin he had discovered in a darkened ballroom and again this afternoon over katsudon. He liked it better than that smooth media-ready smile.

He still needed to move. Quietly, he snuck out of his room, heaving a sigh of relief when Victor wasn’t waiting for him in the hall, and crept down the back hallway. A murmur of voices from the kitchen told him his mother had commandeered Victor. Hopefully she would keep him busy enough for Yuuri to straighten his head out with a good run and some quiet time.

~~~

Victor stared dumbfounded after his retreating love. It was a blow to his ego, but also a bit to his heart. Not responding for months was one thing, but now Yuuri was running from his kisses! What did I do wrong??

Hiroko stepped inside the room carrying a pile of bedding. “Vicchan, I brought this for you to sleep on tonight. Tomorrow we can get you a proper western bed if you’d rather have that than a futon, but for tonight...Vicchan?”

Victor started and blinked. “Oh, yes, thank you Hiroko-san.”

“Are you ok Vicchan?”

“Hrm?” Victor turned his eyes up to her and only then realized that a few tears had slid down his cheeks. He dashed them away hurriedly and pasted a smile on his lips. “Of course! Sorry, I just…”

Hiroko shook her head knowingly as he trailed off, at a loss for an excuse.

“Did my silly Yuu-chan push you away? That boy!”

“No, It was...I mean yes, but I’m sure...I...I” Victor gulped a huge breath. “I think I may have misunderstood. What he wanted from me.”

“Oh Vicchan. Don’t despair. My poor boy is always pushing people away. He gets overwhelmed. But he doesn’t mean it. He just needs time, to come to himself.” Hiroko patted him gently on the head, a motherly gesture that made Victor feel unaccountably better. “Don’t worry, Yuu-chan always comes back to you. He’s been chasing you his whole life. Give him time.”

Victor murmured, “My friend Chris said the same thing. But just because he’s chasing something doesn’t mean he really wants to catch it.”

Hiroko clucked her tongue. “Come down and have some tea before bed, dear. It’ll make you feel better. Things will look brighter in the morning.”

Victor smiled a little. Yuuri’s mother was so sweet. “Thank you, Hiroko-san. That sounds nice.”

“Please, call me Okaasan.”

A lump formed in Victor’s throat, nearly choking off his words. “Of course. Okaasan.”

The word felt like grace on his tongue, warming him the same way Yuuri’s kisses had.

~~~

Yuuri ran his usual route, letting the steady thud of his legs, the rush of blood in his ears, the prickle of sweat down his back all serve to steady and center him. His whirling thoughts slowed, and eventually he felt almost calm. He was no longer standing on the edge of a precipice, staring a panic attack in the face.

He was unfortunately heaving for breath. Victor’s earlier comment about his weight had stung, but the man was right, curse him. Yuuri had lost much, and while he had begun to regain some of it, he still had a ways to go until he was in competition shape again. He flung himself down on the beach, arms draped over his raised knees and head hanging between his shoulders, waiting for the pounding of his heart to return to normal.

Yuuri realized he had made a decision. He wanted to keep competing, and more importantly, he wanted to do it with Victor at his side. The shock of Victor actually showing up was beginning to wear off, and he was beginning to realize he was happy. Happy that Victor was here, happy Victor seemed to want him both as a student, a friend, a lover even. Yuuri traced his fingers over his lips, remembering the insistent press of Victor’s lips on his own. Remembering his taste and the intoxicating smell of him.

Here, in the quiet of the night, on the deserted beach of his hometown, the idea of Victor Nikiforov as his lover didn’t seem like quite such a shocking over-reach on his part. After all. Victor had come to him, messaged him, chased him back to Japan, kissed him...It was hard to believe all that effort and evidence of interest were only in Yuuri’s imagination, once his demons quieted. He hoped Victor wasn’t too upset with him for running away.

The sweat had long dried, and he knew the hour was growing late. He heaved himself to his feet with a groan, and turned back towards home at a gentle jog. He needed to apologize to Victor.

The Onsen was dark and quiet when he returned. Evidently everyone had retreated to their beds, though a dim light still shone under Mari’s door. Yuuri paused outside the banquet room converted to Victor’s bedroom. He bit his lip, debating internally. The room looked dark, but perhaps…

Yuuri silently slid the door aside and peeked into the room. Someone had made Victor a futon on the floor, surrounded by his many boxes. Makkachin snuggled against her owner’s side, but she raised her head and thumped her tail in soft greeting. A soft light from the hall shone on Victor’s face, illuminating the tears still dampening it. Yuuri’s heart constricted painfully. That was almost certainly his fault.

Kneeling beside Victor’s bed, he patted Makka’s head and leaned over Victor to softly kiss his forehead and whisper a remorseful Sumimasen. The sleeping man stirred, turning his face up towards Yuuri’s, and impulsively he fit his lips over Victor’s for a moment, savoring once more the softness and sweet taste of him. When he pulled back, he saw half-closed blue-eyes trained on his face.

“Yuuri?” Victor whispered.

Yuuri blushed at being caught, but smoothed the silver hair away from his forehead. “Shh. I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m sorry.”

Victor’s slow, gentle smile warmed Yuuri to his toes, and made his heart thump wildly. “Please, wake me with kisses any time. Are...are you ok?”

“Yes. I. Uh, you...you should sleep. We’ll talk in the morning?”

Victor’s fingers gripped his. “Stay here? Please?”

Yuuri bit his lip, embarrassment and want warring within him. Victor tugged gently at his hand, and the last of Yuuri’s resistance crumbled. Kicking off his running shoes, he slid under the blankets, allowing Victor to wrap him in his long arms. Victor slid into sleep again almost immediately, but Yuuri lay awake some time longer, cheek pillowed on the firm breast of the other man, and contemplated the abrupt turns his life had taken in a single day.

However much the changes terrified him, he realized he would face any future terrors a thousand times over to savor this moment of peace, wrapped in the arms of this man. Yuuri’s heart thumped happily as he finally slid into sleep.

[figureskatingask]

Hi again! Regarding my "best moments" question, make it personal! :) Can't wait to read your thoughts! ♥

Thanks for asking!

All right, here we go. This is the mod’s TOP 10 best moments of the season.

PLEASE NOTE HEAVILY BIASED.

10. Magic in Canada (Jason Brown, 2017 Skate Canada)

Watching Jason Brown skate is always a semi-magical experience. Even when he’s not skating well, he’s still lovely to watch. Skate Canada was probably the first clue that this season wasn’t going to end well for him, but he covered it so beautifully and magnificently that it was hard to even remember that he’d made mistakes. Though it was obvious that he still wasn’t as comfortable with the Inner Love free skate as he had been with the previous year’s The Piano, it was still a magical, incredible skate that saw him take home the silver medal.

9. Olympic Redemption (Brendan Kerry, 2018 Winter Olympics)

The enduring image out of Team Australia’s 2014 Olympic campaign was of Brendan Kerry in tears in the kiss and cry, as he waited for the score that would place him dead last and see him miss the free skate. Brendan would later admit that he wasn’t ready for it, and was too immature to handle it. Four years later in Korea he was searching for redemption, and he got it. Under pressure and under those five rings, he put together a brilliant short program that didn’t just see him qualify, but saw him qualify comfortably. The pure joy that lit up his whole body when he finished told the story. He didn’t blow it this time.

8. Qualify In Style (Kailani Craine, Katia Alexandrovskaya/Harley Windsor, 2017 Nebelhorn Trophy)

Nebelhorn Trophy. In an Olympic season, possibly the most stressful competition outside of the games themselves. Coming into 2017 Nebelhorn, Australia was looking for three disciplines, though I think everyone knew it was unlikely we could get a dance berth. With only four spots up for grabs in pairs, and Katia and Harley switching between Junior and Senior, that was the one that everyone was most freaked out about. But not only did Katia and Harley and Kailani all qualify, they did in style, the top qualifiers in their divisions, with medals to boot!

7. You Didn’t See That Coming (Max Aaron, 2017 Cup of China)

In the leadup to Cup of China, checking everyone’s predictions revealed two things: almost nobody thought Max Aaron would be in medal contention, and nearly everyone thought he would lose to his younger teammate, Vincent Zhou. The short program, at least, saw one of those things debunked: Max was three points ahead of Vincent after that section. His free skate was undoubtedly the best he ever skated: three landed, clean quads for a 175 FS, and as the night wore on, it became apparent that that score was going to hold up over all. He ended up winning the free skate and the overall bronze, and reminded everyone he had every intention of going to Korea.

6. Two Disciplines Are Better Than One (Andrew Dodds, 2018 Four Continents)

Double-dipping is not unheard of, especially for the Dodds family, who had had Jordan, Ryan and Matthew double-dipping in Pairs and Men’s for some years. But double-dipping at the ISU Championship level? It’s something that is practically unheard of. When Andrew started ice dance with Chantelle Kerry, none of us predicted how rapidly they would rise. And then Andrew came in second in the men’s event at Nationals, just seven points behind Brendan and winning the PCS, so he was named to both teams.

The day I was especially worried about was the day of the men’s SP/free dance at 4CC. The two performances for Andrew were approximately four hours apart. After setting a new PB for their FD, I was worried Andrew wouldn’t have enough energy to make the cut. I needn’t have worried - not only was he clean, he set a new PB for the SP as well!

5. How To Bounce Back From Disappointment (Jason Brown/Max Aaron, 2018 Four Continents)

When you miss out on the Olympic team and are given a consolation prize instead, there are two ways you can handle it. One is to handle it the way Ross Miner did: refuse everything and quit. The other is to handle it the way Jason Brown and Max Aaron did: light up the consolation competition with your best performances of the season. Both Jason and Max were outstanding at Four Continents, but Jason was particularly exquisite, showing a breathtaking, enchanting skate that won him the bronze, while Max had his highest PCS score ever for the SP and second-highest for the FS. Given both men’s sore disappointment at their Nationals results, and the fact that Four Continents was only two weeks later, they were remarkable performances.

4. The Announcement/The Return of Give Me Love (Joshua Farris, Skate it Forward, May 2017)

If this had come off, it would have been my number one moment for the season (as it is I’m being a bit cheeky including it on this season’s list). Like other Joshua fans I had mourned ceaselessly for the career that could have been since the first announcement in July 2016; so the second announcement in February 2017 had me incandescent with joy. However, it wasn’t until May 2017 that we finally got to see what we had all longed to see: Joshua performing on the ice once more. It came thanks to a fancam from the Skate it Forward show, and it was Give Me Love made a thousand times more special by the thought that we might never have seen it again - and perhaps we never will.

3. Australia Day at the Junior Grand Prix Final (Katia Alexandrovskaya/Harley Windsor, 2017 Junior Grand Prix Final)

As the reigning Junior World Champions, Katia and Harley were expected to qualify for the JGPF easily, which they did in due fashion. But by the time they got to JGPF in December, they had already competed a long season, including two JGPs and two Senior B events (including the Nebelhorn qualifier, after which they had only a week’s break before their second JGP) and they were starting to look a little tired. The Russian pairs, with less workload on them during the fall season, looked far fresher. But Katia and Harley held on, winning the JGPF and becoming the first Australian skaters in any discipline to do so.

Unfortunately for Australia (and Katia and Harley), out of GP, GPF, JGP, and JGPF, JGPF was the only one that didn’t count for the Team Event.

(Even more unfortunately, the actual Australia Day, during 4CC, did not go well at all.)

2. The Backup Support Dog (Max Aaron, 2018 World Championships)

Anyone who knows me knows that this would be near the top of my list. After being the third alternate, nobody (including Max) expected that he would go to Worlds. He had gone home to Arizona and even got himself a job. And then suddenly Jason Brown declined, Ross Miner declined, and Max was pressed into action. On just two weeks’ training, he managed 15th after the SP, and remarked that he was just there to support Nathan and Vincent and as “backup” for the three spots in case something went wrong. Well, it did, and Max’s 11th combined with Nathan’s 1st allowed the US to keep the three spots. If this is how it ends, it was an ending that perfectly encapsulated why I love him so much.

1. That Perfect Olympic Moment (Yuzuru Hanyu, 2018 Winter Olympics)

I went into the Olympics fairly neutral. I had no real strong desire to see any one of the men win, though I was pulling for Olympic Medallist Boyang Jin just for the fandom freakout. All I wanted was for the Olympic Champion to have two good, Olympic Champion-worthy skates.

By the end of the SP, I was firmly Camp Hanyu. As far as I was concerned, no other result would do (unless Hanyu repeated his CoC14 FS, which I thoroughly hoped he wouldn’t). And when he came out for that free skate, I was throroughly enchanted. He threw down a brilliant skate under the greatest pressure of all and while injured. It was the moment of the season for me.

[missmudpie]

It’s Ice Dancing Night!!

In honor of tonight’s Olympic Ice Dancing Short Programs, I’m bringing back this old chestnut that I still intend to write one day.

It’s 2006, and Oliver Queen, at 21 years of age, is posed to have his big breakout year.  He’s got the jumps, sure, but where he really excels is his footwork and spins.  Those who tangentially watch skating know he’s something of a ‘bad boy,’ preferring to skate to contemporary rock rather than classical.  Skating insiders know that that persona extends far off the ice, as well (”Okay, in truth - Queen is kinda a douche.  But that’s waaaay off-record.”)  He’s podiumed at all his Grand Prix events, and but for a two-footed landing in his Short Program at Nationals , he would have won.  But he scores the silver, and that’s enough - Oliver Queen is going to the Olympics.

Until he’s not.

He takes a bad fall at practice a week later.  Or he crashes while skiing with some groupies.  Not sure yet how douche-tastic I want this Oliver to be, but suffice it to say - He blows out his knee.  2006 is out.  He tries a comeback later that year, but he can’t get his jumps back.  His knee just can’t support it.  And so Oliver retires.

Which, in truth, is probably for the best.  He goes to school, straightens out his life.  His little sister, Thea, has followed in his skates and become quite the skater herself.  

And now it’s late 2016.  Oliver comes home for the holidays and, as he does every so often, puts on his skates and takes a spin around the family’s private rink.  He’s still got the footwork, effortlessly moving from inside to outside edge.  He’s still got the spins.

He still can’t jump.

Little does he know, this private skate has an audience.  Anatoli Knyazev - Oliver’s former coach, Thea’s current coach - tells him that Oliver is still a master skater.  He’s in great shape physically, and mentally even stronger now, at 31 than he was at 21.  “I have friend,” Anatoli tells him.  “He’s looking to do something different with a pair.  You should call him.”

Oliver looks at the card for a John Diggle.  “But I can’t jump.”

“This is no problem.”  When Oliver gives him a skeptical look, Anatoli just grins.  “Call him.  Keep your mind open.”

“You mean keep an open mind?”

So Oliver does, because why not?  He meets John Diggle, who’s looking to earn his way back into the skating community.  He’s got the goods, and he’s got the elusive choreographer Lyla Michaels in his back pocket.  (”Michaels, really?  How’d you score her?”  Digg smiles.  “I married her.”)  Diggle just needs a team.

“Look, man,” Oliver says.  “I really wish I could help.”

“Anatoli says you still skate as well as you used to.”

“Anatoli is being kind.  And besides, I still can’t jump.”

Diggle looks confused.  “I don’t see how that’s a problem.  Jumps aren’t allowed.”

Now Oliver is confused.  “I’m pretty sure jumps are a large part of pairs skating.”

And now Diggle laughs.  “Anatoli, you son of a bitch.  He didn’t tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“I’m not looking of a pairs team,” Diggle says.  “I’m looking for ice dancers.”

And at first, Oliver is like, Hard no.  Pass.  But then he makes the mistake of telling Thea about this strange meeting, and she’s all for it.  “You loved the ice.”

“I did.  I still do.  But I don’t love who I was on the ice.”

“Then do it right this time.”

And oh, look, we’re at the end of chapter one.

So Oliver calls Diggle and says, “I’m in,” and, BTW, who’s my partner?

“Felicity Smoak.  Great skater.”

Oliver’s never heard of her.  Thea, who should know her, has never heard of her.

“Fly out to Boston.  You can see her in action.”

Digg’s right - Felicity Smoak is a great skater.

It’s just - she’s a speed skater.  Short track, to be precise.

“Promise is a promise, Smoak,” Digg says.  “You said you’d give it a try if I found the right partner.  Well, here he is.”

So, to recap: We have a man who hasn’t skated professionally in a decade, with a bum knee who can’t jump; and woman who hasn’t figure skated since she was a little girl.  And yes, Felicity is fast and has great edgework and kind of remembers how to spin - but seriously.  This is the Island of Misfit Skaters, here.

But what the hell, right?

So they start practicing.

And I haven’t figured out all the details, but here’s what I got so far, in bullet points because this is already way too long:

- Turns out Felicity was a crackerjack figure skater when she was little, but the cost of the sport was just too much for her single mother, so she turned to speed skating.  “And roller derby.  You can make some good under-the-table cash at roller derby.”

- Neither one can dance.  Like, really.  They can’t dance.  Digg has to teach these idiots how to dance off the ice, so they can dance on the ice.  “Oliver, can you please hold her a little closer.  My God, you two are adults and you’re acting like this is a middle school dance.”

- So you know how the ISU picks the theme/type of dance for the short program?  Yeah, in this fic, it’s the tango.  So, basically, sex on skates.

- They’re first performance?  UTTER DISASTER.  Horrible short program.  But they pull it together for the long and somehow it goes viral and now everyone is talking about Smoak/Queen because they got like, a million youtube hits.

- So we go through some competitions and off-ice shenanigans because the best way to get those twizzles in sync is clearly to spend lots and lots of time together off-ice.

- And now it’s Nationals, 2018.

- They’re main competition?  West and West.  As in Iris West and Wally West, a sibling team.

- Smoak and Queen come in second.  Do I want the extra drama of the US Olympic Committee not wanting to pick them for the team?  TBD  

- Other familiar faces?  The Canadian team of Danvers and Allen.  Oliver thinks their suspiciously nice.  (They aren’t.  They are genuinely puppy dogs).  (They’ve been skating together since they were four.  Their mothers have been planning their wedding since they were 13.  Little do they know, Kara is sleeping with James, their choreographer, and Barry has a mad crush on Iris West.)

- Tommy Merlyn and Laurel Lance were contemporaries of Oliver back in the day (they skated pairs), are now engaged, and serve as commentators for whatever fake channel is broadcasting the Olympics.

- Now, here’s where it gets muddy.

- Because in the movie, the woman has a fiancee, and the man sleeps with a rival skater.  And I don’t want to do that.

- So I think we need another source of conflict.

- You remember that episode of Friends where either Ross or Chandler is worried that his actress girlfriend is cheating on him with her co-star?  And Joey says if two people haven’t slept together, their sexual chemistry is through the roof, but once they have, it disappears?

- Oliver and Felicity are at peak sexual chemistry at Nationals.

- And - don’t shoot me - but I kinda want them to sleep with each other before the Olympics.  Or maybe at the Olympics.  In the Village.  The night before they’re scheduled to skate their short program for the Team competition.

- And it’s bad.

- Like - Oliver and Felicity should not have bad sex.  But they’re tired and on a college dorm twin bed and I don’t even know how they got themselves in this situation but the bottom line is they have sex and it’s bad.

- And the next morning is sooooo awkward.

- And they have to skate the tango.

- And like, with the tango, hate could have helped.  But they aren’t angry at each other, they’re just tentative.  And awkward.

- And their program is technically fine but has no fire, no passion.

- And they come off the ice and Digg just looks at them like, Fuck, you idiots screwed each other and now have screwed yourselves.

- Yeah I don’t know what happens next to fix it.

- But they do a great short program a few days later.

- Oh I forgot the part about doing a semi-legal lift or something I don’t know I’m making this up as I type it.

- So they’re in solid position for the long program and they get to skate last and Hey, this would be a great time to have an Airing of the Feelings NO KARA NO ONE NEEDS A COUGH DROP.

- And then they skate the Performance of Their Lives.

- But is it enough?  Do they Win the Gold?

- (They win the gold.)

- Why am I like this?

- Any one got music suggestions for the long program?  Because the short is clearly Assassin’s Tango.

EDITS:

- Commentary will now be done by Martin Stein (as the network guy) and Sara Lance and Leonard Snart, former pairs skaters.

- I’m now thinking Oliver and Felicity need to skate the short program in the Team competition, helping Team USA secure the bronze, and at the celebration afterwards things get a little out of hand, one thing leads to another, and yeah - either awkward sex or awkward near sex.

- Want to see their short dance?  It’s right here (Virtue and Moir, 2010 Olympics) (Although it’s a bit of a cheat because this was before they reformatted Ice Dancing from three skates to two, but whatever.  Check out the lift!)

- I have their Long Program/Free Dances picked out, too, but I ain’t telling.

[omgkatsudonplease]

[fic, viktor/yuuri, canon divergence] Constructive Criticism

Written for @elle-chat, who donated to @katsukiyuuristrophyhusband‘s nancy fund. The prompt was “canon divergence, vicchan lives”. Thanks for donating; hope you like this!

He gets the call from Mari around noon. “I thought — I thought it was best to let you know,” she says, her voice wavering over the connection, each breath like static. “Vicchan’s at the vet. He — there was an accident. We’re not sure if he’ll make it.”

Yuuri sets down the phone with shaking hands, ending the call like an aforethought. He clenches his fists, feeling the hallway shift and his breath come short in his chest.

Of all the days, it had to be today, right? The day of the Grand Prix Final in Sochi? He feels a lump rise in his throat, choking out the rest of his air. There’s a hand on his shoulder, Celestino’s voice resounding from the end of a tunnel as he guides him to his feet and onto the rink for warm-up. His feet don’t feel like his own; the rest of him seems cut off from his brain, from his vision now fogging up on the —

“Mr Katsuki!”

Yuuri feels the cold hardness of the ice, the pain flaring into painful clarity. He blinks rapidly, the fog in his head clearing as other hands help him off the ice into the bleachers.

The whispers echo around him. Is he all right? Will he be able to skate tonight? Hopefully he hasn’t hurt himself. He’s being poked and prodded, checked for injuries. He’s sore, but fit to skate, if he could get himself out of his head (or his head out of himself) in time to do it properly.

“Do you need some time alone?” asks Celestino. Yuuri feels the guards on his skates. He loosens the boots, nodding as the solid firmness of the ground returns as he puts his shoes back on.

“Five minutes,” says Celestino. “But you know you need a little warm-up. Don’t do any jumps. You psych out too hard if you fall.”

Yuuri takes a couple deep breaths and smiles.

Yuuri’s not allowed on social media before competitions. It’s a rule he worked out when he was younger and just starting to get noticed by the JSF as their new rising star. It doesn’t even matter if the feedback’s negative or positive; either he’ll get discouraged from the critics or he’ll feel too much pressure from well-wishers hoping he won’t fail.

So because Celestino has taken his phone at his past self’s own insistence, Yuuri can’t check in with Mari about Vicchan and has to fiddle uselessly with the zipper of his jacket as he tries to calm himself down. The others are still skating; he can hear the scratches of skates against the ice every time the rink door opens and closes.

“Are you alright?” A shadow falls over him; Yuuri looks up, and is briefly blinded by the halo of light obscuring the figure from view. He blinks, and then his childhood idol’s concerned expression swims into view.

“Um,” he says intelligently, berating himself almost as soon as he does so because yes, that’s definitely the first thing he wants to say to Viktor Nikiforov on the day he’s supposed to meet the man on the same ice.

(He’s almost glad he doesn’t live in a society where the first words of a soulmate are tattooed on his body somewhere, because if on the off chance Viktor Nikiforov had been his soulmate, well.)

“You took a fall earlier, and I was a little caught up but I just wanted to see if you’re okay,” Viktor clarifies.

“I’m fine,” Yuuri says, as if on autopilot. “Just nervous.”

Viktor chuckles. “We’re all nervous,” he says, and then to Yuuri’s increasing consternation the handsome silver-haired Russian takes a seat next to him. “Viktor,” he says, extending a hand.

“Yuuri,” says Yuuri, shaking his hand. “I — I know your name.”

Viktor laughs. “A lot of people do,” he points out.

“Yeah.” Yuuri looks off into the distance. “You don’t have to — you don’t have to sit here, you know. With me. I’m fine.”

“How do you know I’m just sitting here with you?” Viktor’s grin is roguish. “I could just be tired and you’ve got the only empty seat next to you.”

Yuuri points to the empty chair across the hallway. Viktor laughs again.

“Okay, point,” he concedes. “But really, I just came to wish you well. I watched your short programme — it was phenomenal.”

Yuuri gapes at him. “You watched —” he begins, but Viktor holds up a finger, and Yuuri’s mouth stops short.

“Thing is,” he says cheerily, “you really need a new choreographer. They’re not making use of your stamina at all. I’ve seen your other stuff too, and it’s obvious you’ve got so much more than what your coach is giving you.”

Yuuri would like nothing more than to transform into ooze and slide between the cracks of the earth. Vanish forever, away from the bright eyes of Viktor Nikiforov’s strange insulting compliments that still make his heart skip a beat. “I — it’s — well, what would you do?”

“You seem to have some kind of block that’s keeping you from feeling your piece entirely. As if you’re scared of unleashing your real emotions onto the ice,” Viktor remarks, and Yuuri can’t help but laugh at that.

“Takes one to know one.” It slips out before he can really stop himself, but to his surprise Viktor’s expression is more amused than insulted.

“You think I’m not feeling my piece entirely?” he asks.

“Um, no, sorry, I mean —”

“It’s all right.” Viktor grins widely. “I love hearing constructive criticism. No one offers it to me anymore; I almost miss it. What do you think I should do?”

Yuuri takes a deep breath. Critique Viktor’s skating? That’s like someone telling him to call the moon ugly, even if the surface of the moon is actually scarred with craters…

“I don’t buy your free skate,” he says. “You’ve got this great love song and you put a lot of skill into it, but your emotions feel manufactured, you know? Like you get some of the loneliness down, but when you’re going into the ‘stammi vicino’ portions where the singer meets his lover, you tend to lose some of your emotion.” He pauses. “Like you’re pretending you understand what love is.” He pauses again. “Not that you’ve — I wouldn’t know — sorry.”

Viktor seems to have gone completely still at the outpouring. He taps his lips thoughtfully with a finger, and then his eyes twinkle as his lips curl up into a smile.

“I really appreciate that, Yuuri,” he says. “I think we should both do our best today, yeah? Give me a good show; I’ll be watching.”

“Me, too,” says Yuuri, hearing Celestino call for him. “Thanks, Viktor.”

Viktor waves at him as he stands up. “Davai, Yuuri.”

He gets a text from Mari after his performance. Vicchan pulled through, it reads. He’s ok. He’ll be home soon and recovered by the end of the week. It’s as if someone has pulled a string and released the tensions coiled in his chest, because it’s suddenly so much easier to breathe.

He sits in the kiss-and-cry, waiting for his scores. Celestino has a hand on his shoulder, smiling proudly. Yuuri hadn’t skated his best, he knows, but he’d skated well enough, knowing Viktor’s eyes are on him. Trying to prove to Viktor that he can at least make the most of what’s given to him. He fell on one of his jumps and popped another, but hopefully combined with his high short programme score, he’ll —

And the score for Yuuri Katsuki is 178.52, putting him at 262.07.

In the end, that only nets him fourth place below Viktor, Christophe Giacometti, and Jean-Jacques Leroy. But Yuuri takes it anyway, because Vicchan is alive and well and he’d like nothing more than to see his dog again.

He fires off a text to Mari: Can I see Vicchan when I get back to the hotel?

Her response is immediate. Yes.

The next time he talks to Viktor, it’s at the banquet after the exhibition skate. He hadn’t skated in it, but he had watched Viktor’s appreciatively from the sidelines. For one heart-stopping moment, Viktor had winked at him as he passed him along the boards, and it had taken all of Yuuri’s strength to remain upright and conscious after that.

Viktor’s eyes had lit up at seeing him enter the room, though the way he surveys Yuuri’s suit clearly suggests he has some opinions about its cut. Of course, the Russian looks perfect in his own charcoal suit and black tie; Yuuri probably looks like an overgrown bug in comparison.

“No, I’m just thinking that it’s a waste to hide your gorgeous figure in some blazer jacket twice your size,” replies Viktor cheekily, and Yuuri tries not to blush.

“Thanks for the advice,” he says.

Viktor grins. “You did well,” he replies. “I’d have given you more points, but alas I’m not the ISU.”

“I popped a jump and fell,” Yuuri points out.

“But you really had emotion this time,” Viktor says. He takes Yuuri by the arm. “What do you think about my routine this time? Sold you on my love story yet?”

Yuuri purses his lips. “I guess?” he says, and Viktor laughs.

“You guess?” he asks. “Wow, you’re a tough crowd to please.”

“I was — it was a good performance. You were good.”

“But not as emotional as you would like.” Viktor winks at him. “I’m guessing the next time we meet it’ll be Worlds, so we have until then to make our separate routines perfect for each other, right?”

“Why are you doing this?” Yuuri blurts suddenly. Viktor drops his arm, blinking at him. Yuuri feels embarrassment well deep in his throat but he forces it back down, pressing on. “Why are you suddenly so friendly to me? I’m just… this is my first year at the Final. We’ve never… you’ve never talked to me, or shown me any sign that you knew I existed.”

Viktor bites his lip, suddenly looking sheepish. “I — I, er, didn’t know how to best approach you,” he replies. “We never skated in the same group at Worlds, and we didn’t get seeded into the same competitions for the Grand Prix, and, well. World Team Trophy’s usually spent half-drunk so I don’t even remember half of what happens during that. But I’ve… well.” He looks downright embarrassed now, his cheeks flushed bright red. “I saw you having a bit of a rough start yesterday, and I just wanted to offer you something to cheer you up.”

“Oh.” Yuuri nods. “Thank you. I’m sorry I was presumptuous.”

“You’re not —” Viktor shakes his head. “You’re the best skater Japan has to offer, so I was told as soon as you started showing up in Grand Prix events to study you.” He laughs a little. “You’re not like most of the competition. You really make the music your own. I admire that.”

Yuuri wonders why the sprinklers haven’t turned on yet, because his face is practically on fire. “Dance with me,” he suggests, for lack of a better way to deflect attention from his skating.

Viktor looks as though Christmas had come early. “Of course,” he says, and takes Yuuri’s hand.

In the morning, Yuuri wakes in an unfamiliar hotel room to the sound of his phone alarm and the warmth of another body in the bed beside him. His head is groggy, but not from alcohol; as he rubs the sleep from his eyes, he turns and sees Viktor lying in bed next to him.

And then Yuuri realises they’re both naked, and the events of last night come creeping back into his memory.

Viktor stirs, cracking open one bright blue eye. “Morning,” he mumbles, and Yuuri’s breath flees him; in the golden morning light he’s almost angelic as he looks up at Yuuri. He wants to freeze the moment and live in this feeling forever. But the alarm continues to ring, so Yuuri snoozes it and reaches out to brush some hair from Viktor’s eyes.

“I have a flight soon,” he says. Viktor makes a disappointed noise, which causes Yuuri’s heart to skip a beat.

“We traded numbers, right?” he asks. “If you… I dunno, just in case.”

“Yeah,” says Viktor. “We should do that.” He sits up, too, yawning and stretching before leaning out of the bed to fumble for his trousers on the ground. Yuuri tries not to stare too hard at the curve of his ass. He fails.

They quickly exchange numbers, and Yuuri feels awkwardness curl strangely in his chest as he clambers out of bed to get dressed under Viktor’s watchful glance. His own room is on a lower floor; he’ll have to run down and get his things. It’ll be obvious to Celestino that he didn’t come back last night, but he’s beyond caring at this point.

“So,” he says once he finishes buttoning his shirt, tucking his tie into his trouser pockets and adjusting his ill-fitting blazer. “Bye, then?”

That seems to galvanise Viktor out of bed, stumbling towards him with a maddening gleam in his eyes. He pins Yuuri against the edge of the hotel’s desk, kissing him deeply and sweetly like he had done last night, his tongue plundering Yuuri’s mouth of all the breath left in him. Yuuri’s hands tighten in the hairs at Viktor’s nape, wanting more of him to have and hold.

“Text me when you get to Detroit,” Viktor breathes, and Yuuri smiles against his lips at that.

“I will,” he promises. “And I’ll show you the pictures of my dog that I promised.”

“I’m glad he’s alright,” replies Viktor. Sometime during last night Yuuri had told him why he had been so worried before the free skate, and Viktor had sighed and said he’d have felt the same if Makkachin had been at the vet with no news about his recovery. They had drifted off to sleep after that, and Yuuri had slept soundly in Viktor’s arms.

He smiles now, his body light and his heart joyful at the prospect of staying in touch with Viktor. “I’ll see you around?” he asks, as Viktor walks him to the door.

“Until Worlds,” says Viktor, and it’s a promise and a challenge all in one.

Yuuri grins, leaning forward to kiss the playful smirk off his face. “Until Worlds,” he agrees, and smiles all the way home.

[askyuurikatsuki]

Phichit Chulanont Leads at Four Continents with Strong Short

Thursday, December 25, 2017 

TAIPEI, CHINESE TAIPEI – The competition may be a bit watered down, but no one would know with the level of competition that appeared tonight. Phichit Chulanont of Thailand is on his way to becoming the first skater from Southeast Asia to win an ISU Championship.  He skated his first clean program of the season, scoring a total of 102.89 – a personal best. “I am so happy with how I skated,” said the 22-year-old. “I wish everyone else would have been here, too, but that doesn’t change what I came here to do – I came here to put down two clean programs, and I’ve done one. One down one to go!”

 Chulanont, who is the first skater from Southeast Asia to win a Grand Prix event and qualify for the Grand Prix Final, has had what he calls “a lackluster season.” He failed to win either of his GP events, though he did qualify for the Final – but placed last for the second year in a row. He has, however, had a busy year. He has been dating recently-minted four-time Canadian Champion Jean-Jacques Leroy of Canada for the better part of a year now. Leroy had three kids from previous relationships. “It has been a busy year, but it has made all of it worth it,” he said. 

In second place is three-time South Korean National Champion, Seung-Gil Lee. The 20-year old skated a clean program to score 98.73, seeking to claim his first major international medal. “I have medaled on the Grand Prix, but I want to put my mark on the bigger stage,” he said to reporters. “I plan on putting down two clean programs here to put myself in a good position for the Olympics next month. That is my goal, and has been my goal all season long.” Lee once again failed to qualify for the Grand Prix Final, so putting down two good programs here is even more important. 

The Olympics, being held in his home country of South Korea, are everyone’s focus right now, but more pressure is placed on the South Korean athletes at their home Olympics. “I am not worried about it,” Lee said frankly. “I am prepared.  I am training hard, and I plan on going to the Olympics and doing what I do every day. The pressure and expectations do not bother me.” Nerves have plagued him all season long and did last year as well, so hopefully, that is true and he can rebound from the disappointing competitions that he has had. 

Three-time and Reigning Chinese National Champion, Cao Bin, also skated a personal best and sits in third. The 21-year-old skated a clean program to score 94.28 points. “I am pleased with how I skated today,” he said. “I wish I would have had a better Grand Prix season, but I have done much better since then.” Bin qualified for the Grand Prix Final back in 2015 but has failed to do so since then. “I have won back my National title, and a medal would go a long way to set me up for the Olympics next month.” 

The Chinese have not officially announced their Olympic Team publically yet; it is a formality at this point, as the two spots for the Chinese men are sure to go Bin and his teammate, 19-year-old and three-time Chinese National Champion, Guang-hong Ji. Like Lee, though – putting down two programs here would do a lot to boost Bin’s confidence with the games only two weeks away. 

Most of the top skaters have skipped the competition because of that proximity. Reigning World and Grand Prix Final Champion, Yuuri Katsuki of Japan, withdrew, along with Reigning Grand Prix Final Silver Medalist Otabek Altin of Kazakhstan, as well as Ji. Leroy was not named to the Canadian Team – a common thing during the Olympic year, and Reigning Grand Prix Final Bronze Medalist, Leo de la Iglesia of the US, was also not named to the US team for the same reason. 

Reigning US Bronze Medalist, Xander Carpenter, skated a personal best of 90.12 to sit in fourth place after the short program, followed closely behind by 2015 Japanese National Champion Kenjirou Minami who scored an 87.14, and 2013 US National Champion, Jack Morgan. The Men’s free takes place on Saturday, where the final group is sure to be a showdown.

[japaniakwrites]

The Thunderstorm

The night before Hael Cohen slapped Macy Zimmerman across her face and drew blood, a spring storm rolled in from the prairie far beyond the lakeshore suburbs. Thunder clapped a half-mile from the house and rattled the windows in all the bedrooms. Hael crawled into her sister’s bed. Nothing else could harm her there, and she and Salem protected each other the way they always had.

Hael knew the sound she made against Macy’s face must have been similar. Blood surfaced on her cheek where there had been four fingernails, the skin screaming red under her hand. Macy may have yelled, since her mouth opened wide as she covered her cheek in shock.

Hael had no remorse about it. Not even as Coach Franklin yanked Salem off of Kate Gutierrez or pulled Hael away with a more delicate hand and led all four of them to the principal’s office. Macy glared at her from the other side of Coach Franklin’s wide, dark blue pullover. Hael stared blankly back at her.

It was a slow-burning kind of torment that led Hael to leave her handprint on Macy’s face. Back in August, they were assigned to the same homeroom, science class and American history class, plus the same lunch period. Being paired with the same groups of students for that many periods was common, but Macy and Kate took an immediate, morbid fascination with Hael.

At first, Hael had wondered if it was her hair. The way her wiry blonde curls stuck out in all directions was something she embraced, but it didn’t match the way most of the girls at school straightened their hair. Macy even regularly asked if she straightened it when she thought Hael wouldn’t notice she meant it mockingly. Other possible causes crossed her mind as well: Her last name couldn’t be more Jewish, she knew she talked strangely compared to everyone else, and she had erroneously spent the first few weeks of school in the special education class even though she didn’t need it.

The real reason struck her when Kate told something to Macy at lunch one day, covering her hand so Hael couldn’t read their lips. The biggest reason was because they thought she couldn’t understand them at all.

Hael navigated the world through a combination of lip-reading and speech therapy, plus the occasional help of a sign language interpreter. It didn’t take long for Hael to realize then that Kate and Macy had probably been talking about her behind her back since the beginning of the year, asking her questions and then stepping away to laugh about how she answered them.

Hael was frustrated enough a few times to cry in the arms of her mother, father or Salem, but she mostly had put up with the torment until the day she struck Macy.

That day, she was already staying at school late, helping paint a mural in the hall outside the gym while Salem was at figure skating practice across the street. She had noticed Macy and Kate watching her from further down the hall, staring at her as they spoke, mouths covered again.

At the time, Hael had just sighed, shook her head and reached for the bucket of orange paint from her spot on the hole-mottled tarp. There were three other students and the art club supervisor working on the mural, and the girls wouldn’t bother her while they were all there painting a scene of a firebird rising from out of the concrete blocks.

She could lose herself in the design she made and watch it come to life for a while. She did it every time. The phoenix always rose in front of her, spitting embers as it fluttered its wings in flight from the caldera of a stirring, dormant volcano. From the ashes in its wake would come the first verdant blossoms of the new spring, gasping as they finally found the sun and bloomed pink and gold and blue.

Still, even after the firebird was freed from its volcanic prison and most other members of the art club had gone home for the day, she could see both girls standing there with their gladiator sandals and Louis Vuitton handbags, watching her. She thought she had seen the word ‘retarded’ pass Kate’s lips at one point--a word Kate drizzled into her vocabulary as liberally as she did ranch dressing on pizza. The rest of the conversation was lost. Hael was paying more mind to picking up the tarp and leftover brushes, plus the prospect of catching Salem in her last few minutes of practice.

The tarp dragged across the floor like the beige train of a wedding dress when Hael carried it and the brushes toward the bathroom next to the gym. Ignore them, her father had said to her a few months ago. A lion would only regret getting involved in the affairs of the sheep that jumped on it while it slept. Her orange- and red-stained paint brushes required more attention. She rounded the corner toward the girls’ bathroom.

The tarp flew over her head and she felt someone shove their hands hard between her shoulder blades. Hael stumbled forward, shouting in surprise. There was cold, hard tile beneath her and the tarp, plus a firecracker of pain whistling through her elbows after she landed on them. The lights beyond the holes of the tarp went black. ----- It will be a sunny Thursday in October when Hael Cohen, in her freshman year at the Savannah College of Art and Design, sees a group of students signing to each other on a bench outside Haymans Hall. What friends she’ll have made already won’t know how to sign, but they all like old anime and Mexican restaurants, so she’ll decide to stick around. Still, she will think it would be nice to have friends who could sign, who wouldn’t eventually ask why she talks that way, who will understand what it means to feel like you’re looking at the crowded world from the outside.

She will stroll over to them with her tote bag of notebooks as they talk about a professor named Pulaski and introduce herself, asking if they live near campus and smiling with excitement and hope rising in her chest. One of the girls will start to introduce herself as Gina and tell Hael where she lives, but she’ll be stopped short.

One of the boys, one with dark hair and glasses, will ask with a serious look on his face, “Are you Deaf or hard of hearing?”

Hael looks at him nervously, wondering if he’s boring a hole into her soul through the dark blue of her eyes. “Hard of hearing,” she finally answers.

The boy will glare at her like she’s stolen money from him. “Sorry. Deaf only.”

Gina’s eyebrows will furrow. “Xavi, she could join us...”

“No.” Xavi will glare at Hael even more. “We’re Deaf only.”

Speechless, Hael will walk away alone, trying to swallow the rapidly forming lump in her throat. She suddenly will find part of herself wishing that she couldn’t hear the thunder clapping outside her window as a child, or even the still-muted distilled sound of her sister screaming after she won the right to compete in the ISU Junior Grand Prix at fourteen years old. She will have only read horror stories about this before, of the death threats sent to deaf musicians or debate about whether the hard-of-hearing should marry hearing people or deaf people, but none of them will ever like more than a thunderstorm beyond a distant hill until that moment.

That will be before Gina gets on her bike and tracks Hael down to see her again. ----- There was an invisible badge of honor Hael wore at school on the breast of her pastel-colored cardigans--one that she had earned for being surprisingly sharp-tongued. Yet, as she sat on the floor in the inky black of the bathroom, frantically texting Salem with her phone gasping on 2% of its battery, she wept. Macy and Kate had made fun of her before, and she had always just insulted them right back and called them things like “horse face and rat face,” but it had never gotten physical.

‘Please come to the bathroom by the gym. Macy and Kate shoved me in here and I can’t find the light.’

Sent.

‘I’ll be there in 2 minutes.’

The rough fabric of the tarp pooled around Hael’s legs as she stood, knees trembling. She sobbed again, wiping her tears on the sleeve of her pink cardigan.

A small, red-hot spark of rage smoldered in her chest. Hael had never fought anyone before, but she figured now was as good of a first time as any. She knew she’d get in trouble. She didn’t care.

Reaching through the pitch, Hael found the concrete wall. Running her hand slowly along, she felt a blast of warm air on her forearm--the hand dryer. A few inches to the right were the sinks, the top of the trough above the faucets flecked with pools of cold water and spilled foam soap. Then there was more concrete wall as she crept along, knowing the tarp was nearby and not wanting to worsen things by tripping over it.

Hael felt the plastic of the light switch beneath her fingertips. She fumbled with it for a second before flipping it upward, illuminating the room. Then, the door swung inward.

There Salem was, still breathing hard and with a lone pinball of sweat trekking from her dark brown bob down her temple from two hours of practicing her free skate. Hael hugged her anyway.

“Are you hurt?” Salem signed, pursing her lips.

“Not physically,” Hael answered, looking away. “I landed on my elbows, but it doesn’t really hurt. I wouldn’t mind getting back at those two though.”

“I’ll take care of them--”

Hael shook her head and grabbed Salem’s arm. “Let me have a swing at one of them.”

Salem looked at her for one second, then another. “Hael, you’ll get in trouble if you do that.”

“I know,” Hael replied. “I’m okay with that. They’ve been bothering me all year because they think I’m weaker than them. I need to prove to them I’m not, even if it means I get in trouble.”

Concern colored Salem’s brown eyes. Finally, she said, “Okay. But you shouldn’t have to prove anything.”

Even though Salem still smelled a little like sweat and felt sticky, Hael welcomed the next long hug from her sister. Salem was growing taller and faster than Hael and was the strongest girl she knew. She pulled the door open with one hand and looked back at Hael as they set out to deliver justice. The tarp and brushes could wait.

[beckettsthoughts]

🌠✖ please?

Thank you so much for asking, anon! These are both things I don’t often discuss, so it was really cool to have that opportunity.

🌠 What’s a past special interest?

One of my favourite past special interests is also the one I speak about the least often, and that’s Skulduggery Pleasant. This special interest lasted me several years, it bridged the gap between primary school and secondary school and it was something I shared with many of my friends. I waited on tenterhooks for each new book release, pre-ordered the hardback copies from my local bookshop, and I devoured every new release in a matter of days. I bought all of the short stories that released between books and read them on my kindle. Skulduggery Pleasant also marked my first experience with fandom, and it was the kind of fandom you don’t really see much of these days. The Skulduggery Pleasant fandom lived entirely on forums, and it was a small enough community that there were some big name fans who were a frequent fixture in different threads. I specifically remember Kribu, who was well-known enough to both fans and the author to have her name included in the penultimate eighth instalment of the series. The special interest faded as school and stress exacerbated my ADHD symptoms, and I remember struggling to read the last few books without losing my focus; not to mention some drama surrounding both fans and the author which was enough to make up my mind about distancing myself from the group. However, this series was still a long-running special interest of mine and one of the series that inspired my passion in storytelling. I owe a lot to Skulduggery Pleasant, both the series itself and the fandom, and I don’t really talk about it as much as I should.

✖️️ Is there something you don’t like about your special interest?

Honestly, I really can’t think of anything I really dislike about my current special interest. I guess I don’t really interact with the fandom much outside of the fanfiction community and for that I have many reasons, but there’s nothing I truly dislike.

However, I can definitely tell a story about one of my old special interests. It was shaping up to become one of my long-running special interests, the ones that exist constantly in the background of my mind, but only a year and a half in something got in the way that made it incredibly emotionally difficult for me to engage with that interest anymore. The interest I’m talking about here is men’s figure skating, in particular the annual ISU Grand Prix skating season.

This special interest got off to a spectacular start for me, because it burned hot in the trail of the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi. When the 2015-2016 Grand Prix season rolled around I was on the edge of my seat for every contest, sitting in my living room either alone or with my mother. I endured the inevitable mockery of my stepfather over it, though it came across as a little hypocritical considering his obsessive following of motorsports, and I didn’t let it bother me. I enjoyed that season so much, and I was so ready for the 2016-2017 season that I basically buzzed with energy whenever I thought about it. It was my absolute favourite thing, the only sport I’d ever invested in, and I was laying my heart and soul on the line for it in a way that only special interests can inspire. At the time I was in recovery from depression and suffering severe anxiety, and I lived to engage in the figure skating commentary and live discussions. The anticipation is what got me through the school day, it was a huge factor in my recovery. I hadn’t been excited about anything in two years and it was new and fantastic and I was revelling in it.

That’s when things went downhill.

My family and I have had a long feud over television watching. I rarely have anything specific to watch on the TV and therefore spend my time at home passively absorbing the tastes of my mother and stepfather, but every now and then there’s something I’d really need to see. Figure skating was that need, for me. We have several televisions in my house but only one of them has access to the sports channels, and that is the big lounge television. Being the evening, my mother and stepfather were watching the “ordinary” channels, those that every television in the damn country has access to. When I asked to watch the skating, knowing that they were watching a channel they could watch in at least two other rooms, they both refused. I was fucking devastated, I had dedicated so much time and emotion into watching these matches and it was the only thing I’d ever insisted on seeing live, and because they couldn’t be arsed to move from one room to another it damn well wrecked me. I’d had a long day, been in a meeting for over five hours, and when I got home and was denied the one thing I had been looking forward to for weeks, I broke down. I had a full on meltdown, hitting myself and scratching myself, and I went completely nonverbal for several hours afterwards. I honestly still hold resentment over this, because it would have been so easy to avoid. It wouldn’t even have been an inconvenience to them, and I still ended up getting trampled.

I still can’t watch figure skating without feeling dirty, somehow. The emotional imprint is just too strong and I can’t bring myself to break my heart over this again. And it’s not a question of if it happens again but when, because that’s the way things work in my house. Maybe in future I’ll be able to watch figure skating without tears creeping their way down my face, but it’s not going to happen in the near future. For now, figure skating will remain a fixture on my blacklist.

[fataziraphale]

role model;

a yuri on ice ficlet. a christophe giacometti character study. enjoy.

Christophe Giacometti was nine years old when he realized he was gay. The catalyst for this life-changing revelation was a silver-haired child, twirling across his TV screen so gracefully that it seemed he was about to push off the ice entirely and fly away.

When Chris began skating in international competitions, a wobbly-legged thirteen-year-old with an untamed nest of blonde curls, Viktor Nikiforov was the standard he held himself up against. Viktor had the score Chris wanted to beat, and the triple axels he wanted to perform, and the seemingly effortless beauty he could only dream of replicating. Viktor was his teacher and his inspiration and his god. Viktor was what propelled him forward, pushed him to keep going, to ignore his bad family life and all his self-doubts and skate, skate, skate.

When Chris was fifteen, he made his senior debut amid a whirlwind of cheers and failures and tears and congratulations. At the European championships, after his skate, he pushed and shoved his way through the stands, hell-bent on getting the perfect seat if it killed him.

“Chris, slow down!” his coach Josef called after him, to which Chris turned around and moaned, “I need to get the perfect seat for Viktor’s skate!” Then he just kept pushing.

Of course, watching Viktor in person was everything he’d thought it would be. He was shimmering and full of magic, surprising and effervescent and perfect in every way. When Viktor’s score was announced, Chris leapt to his feet. He had never screamed so hard in his life.

A single rose, tossed into the crowd. Viktor smiled gently at a bewildered, dumbstruck Chris, who was so overwhelmed he could barely take it in, a life dream realized, an ambition achieved. His muscles were frozen. His heart had stopped. Viktor noticed him. Viktor noticed him. Viktor noticed him.

Josef chuckled as Viktor floated away, sparkling ponytail bouncing under an inky flower crown. “He’s your favorite, right? You’ll have to work hard to make sure you don’t let him down.”

Numb with shock and blushing fiercely, Chris nodded.

When Chris turned eighteen and the snow melted and February rolled into May, he competed in the World Championships yet again. To an outside observer, this Chris might seem an entire world apart from the boy he had once been—far taller, cheeks dotted with stubble, and skating to themes so racy that bosoms were clutched in horror. He had a whole new fanbase now, a legion of young ladies who wanted to date him, or fuck him, or something of that kind. He didn’t care about them. Every erotic program he begged Josef to let him use was dedicated to just one man.

At World’s, when Chris was eighteen, he achieved bronze for the very first time. A bronze medal was good, but his other prize was better. He stood on the podium next to Viktor, watching the light glint off the gold medallion that the Russian wore over his heart. Chris got that funny feeling in his chest again, a pleasant tingling in his groins, the idea that maybe he was doing something right after all.

Viktor turned to him, and Chris melted. “Congratulations, Christophe. You skated well today.”

“Thank you,” Chris babbled. “Thank you! And you were wonderful! Of course! As always!”

Viktor smiled, but there was a hint of sadness in it, an element of upturned mouth that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

After that, after sharing the podium with his Viktor, it was like some kind of switch inside Chris had been flipped on. He raked in medals hand over fist, skate after skate—bronze at the Grand Prix Final. Gold at Swiss Nationals. Bronze at the European Championships. Fourth place at World’s, work harder, harder—bronze at the Grand Prix Final. Gold at Swiss Nationals. Silver at Euros! Silver at Euros! Silver at Euros!

The thing driving Chris, the frenzied desire that kept him going, was the knowledge that his endgame was a podium with Viktor. A chance to talk to Viktor. A smile, passed from Viktor’s lips to Chris’s. Somewhere along the way, Chris had gotten the idea in his head that without a medal, he wouldn’t be worthy of Viktor’s attention. Otherwise, without a hint of silver glinting proudly off his puffed-out chest, who was he to the greatest figure skater of all time?

Chris’s skating, Chris’s fantasies about Viktor—both became tangled and confused, rolled into one entity in his fanatical mind. The rink turned into Sodom and the act of putting blades to ice transformed into the essence of eroticism itself, as he imagined grinding his hips into Viktor, running his hands down Viktor’s sides, nibbling Viktor’s lips and whispering dirty somethings into his ear.

Of course, this was only in his fantasies. When Chris saw Viktor off-rink, it was just to grab a fleeting lunch or take a few selfies before hurrying back to the ice to keep on winning. Chris’s sprits drooped as the ever-serious Viktor spewed hundreds of excuses:

“I need to spend a lot of time warming up today, so we have to keep this short. I flubbed my quad loop during practice yesterday and Yakov won’t let me hear the end of it if I mess it up in my short program.”

“Oh, don’t post that one online, Chris. I’m not wearing any makeup. My fans sure don’t need to see that!”

“I know I promised I would come visit you in Switzerland, Chris, and I’m so sorry, but I just don’t have the time. My free skate this season has some really tricky choreography, and if I take a break now I might not be prepared in time for Skate Canada.”

It wasn’t like Chris didn’t have the moves. He’d fucked hundreds of boys, charmed them and seduced them, twirled them around his little finger and brought them home with him. But for some reason, Viktor didn’t seem interested in any moves that weren’t performed on a skating rink.

The only thing that Chris could think of was that he wasn’t good enough.

So he improved himself the only way he knew how: throwing himself wholeheartedly into grinding two blades against ice, over and over and over and over again.

Winning silver became a habit. Commentators ceased to be surprised by it. When one watched an ISU event, one learned to expect Chris and Viktor, Viktor and Chris, perpetually together on the podium. But Viktor didn’t want him yet. Chris had to do even better.

In Chris’s head, beating Viktor meant winning Viktor as his own, meant that all his years of pining and wanting and waiting would finally be allowed to climax in Viktor’s arms. It was strange. He wanted to please Viktor, but he also wanted to take his place. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted to fuck Viktor or be Viktor, but one thing was certain—Chris wasn’t good enough as he was. He wished more than anything that he were someone else.

Chris was 24 now. He was running out of time.

And Viktor was crying.

Chris blinked. He’d returned to the locker room to grab his thong (he’d forgotten it after he changed, which would be sexy if it wasn’t kind of embarrassing), and found Viktor instead. The Russian was sitting alone, knees curled up to his chest, eyes bloodshot, with snot oozing into his mouth and tears staining his cheeks. Chris wasn’t sure what to do. He felt like he was intruding on something intensely private, but he was also just… surprised. Viktor’s short program had been perfect, without a single technical error. There was no way anyone could catch up to him now. Not even Chris.

Viktor jumped when Chris walked in, then shook his head and buried his face deeper in his knees. “I’m so sorry, god… you shouldn’t have to see me like this…”

Chris frowned. “What do you mean, shouldn’t have to? Viktor, are you all right?”

“No no no, I’m fine, nothing happened, I’m fine, just go, please…”

Chris sat down next to him. He took his hand. “I want to be here for you, Viktor. I’m your friend. Please tell me.”

With a visceral, ungraceful sniffle, Viktor raised his head. “Nothing even happened, that’s what’s so stupid… god, I must seem like an idiot to you, crying when I’m doing so well…” He wiped his nose on his arm. “I’m sorry, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just like this, and I don’t know how to stop it…”

Chris didn’t know how to stop it, either. But he nodded, and he squeezed Viktor’s hand.

“I admire you so much,” Viktor babbled, staring straight ahead instead of at Chris. “Did I ever tell you that? You’re so good at being yourself, even in front of the press… and then there’s me. I’m terrible at being myself. I don’t even really know who I am?”

“I know who you are!” said Chris, without a moment’s hesitation. “You’re Viktor Nikiforov! The greatest figure skater who ever lived!”

Viktor’s face sunk back into his knees, disappearing from sight.

Chris held his hand and rubbed his back and said things he hoped were soothing. After while, Viktor stood up and left. Chris went back to his hotel.

The next day, Viktor’s free skate was perfect, as it always was. He won gold and smiled for the press. He didn’t speak with Chris except to say “Good job!” to the silver medal hanging around his neck.

Maybe Viktor wasn’t the person Chris really wanted to be. Maybe Viktor was broken and scarred the same way that Chris was broken and scarred, and winning gold wouldn’t make him feel whole or make him happy or help him fall in love.

But Chris didn’t know what other goal he could possibly have, or what else he could aspire to be. He didn’t know a world outside skating, outside Viktor. He’d been doing this for so, so long.

He texted Viktor that night, just to make sure he wasn’t mad at Chris. Just to make sure he was okay.

Viktor didn’t respond.

And so Christophe Giacometti took to the ice once again.

[eunsoo-lim]

Goldenskate article on Eunsoo’s preparations for the new season.

-----

South Korea’s Eun-soo Lim turned a few heads in her international debut season 2016-17 when she took a bronze medal at the Junior Grand Prix in Dresden, Germany, and finished fourth in her first appearance at the 2017 ISU World Junior Figure Skating Championships.

The 2017-18 season has just begun, and the petite skater is ready to go. She won silver at the Asian Open Trophy in Hong Kong in early August, and in two days, will compete in her first Junior Grand Prix event this season in Salzburg, Austria.

Scott Brown choreographed Lim’s short program to “Rich Man’s Frug,” while Cindy Stuart created the long to “Grand Guignol” and “Oblivion.”

“I chose powerful music for both programs this season, especially in the free program,” the Korean champion explained. “I mixed various Tango pieces to show a strong and a soft performance at the same time.”

At the 2017 Asian Open Trophy, Lim finished second to Japan’s Rika Kihira, who landed a triple Axel. Lim was not entirely pleased with herself. In the short program, Lim’s triple flip-triple toe combination was called underrotated, but she landed a good triple Lutz in the second half of the program. In the long, the Korean champion skated clean, only her triple Lutz-triple toe combination drew a few minus 1 Grades of Execution (GOE).

“I would like to have had a perfect performance at Asian Trophy, but I will make it up by training harder,” she said.

Lim eyes the podium again in Salzburg this week in her second event of the season.

“My second Junior Grand Prix will be the sixth event in Poland,” the teenager from the Seoul area confirmed. “My goal is to compete in the Junior Grand Prix Final after having done clean programs in both events.”

Like many other young Korean skaters, Lim once was inspired by 2010 Olympic Champion and 2014 Olympic silver medalist Yuna Kim to take up the sport of figure skating.

“I saw Yuna Kim in a competition on TV when I was six or seven years old and her costume was so sparkly! I was so young, I just wanted to wear that costume so I started skating,” Lim recalled.

Lim’s coach Hyun Jung Chi, just happens to be one of Kim’s former coaches, and been coaching Lim for three and a half years now. “She has a really nice mentality. She has improved so much. Her jumps are better and her performance has improved as well,” said the coach.

Although she is only 14 years old, Lim knows what she wants and is very goal-oriented. She likes to choose her music herself. Coach Chi describes the young skater’s personality as “strong.”

“I think I am a happy person,” Lim shared. “I like to communicate with people.” To be able to talk with people from different countries, she has been studying English with a teacher.

Lim, who looks up to USA’s Ashley Wagner and Canadian Kaetlyn Osmond, enjoys competing and being watched by many people when she is performing. Her coach sees a lot potential in her. “I think she can be champion at Junior Worlds and be in the top three at World Championships (in the future),” Chi said.

Off the ice, Lim is in school, but does not go to class on a regular basis. “She is not home-schooled,” the coach explained. “She attends middle school, but usually she is at the rink training with the permission of the school and for the examinations she goes to school.”

“It is very hard in Korea to balance studies and training,” Chi continued. “She needs to study more, but the system does not work for her right now. The education department limited the number of the competitions during the semester, so it is really hard for the skaters.”

Lim makes it clear that she has her priorities: “I focus more on my skating, but I chose skating and I think that was good.”

In her spare time, the skater enjoys baking cookies or bread and preparing snacks. “She is a very good cook, I heard,” Chi offered. “She likes doing cookies and cakes, but now she has been focusing on preparing food. She could be a chef one day.”

However, Lim might have different plans for her future after her competitive career. “I like singing, but I am not really good, I am just trying. I think I would like to try to become a singer,” she said with a smile.

[toraonice]

Yuri on Ice BD booklet translation (with Jun Shishido & Yuusuke Tannawa interview) - Volume 4

The full translation of the booklet of vol.4 is finally done... Actually, one of the reasons it took me so long is that I spent most of the time I was home from Thursday to Sunday watching Fuji TV’s live coverage of the World Championships, lol. And I’m glad I did because it was really exciting. It does make a difference to watch it live without knowing the results... I will work on the audio commentary and choreography part in the next few days, and hopefully on other stuff too.

The booklet has 3 parts: 1) Character introduction for Phichit, Chris and Guang-Hong. 2) “Topics”, in other words random curiosities.  3) Interview with chief director Jun Shishido and screen designer Yuusuke Tannawa. Most of you will probably have no idea who they are (and their titles are by no means a good explanation of what their actual role was), but I really recommend reading this interview because it gives more insight on the creation process of YOI and maybe it helps understand how hard it is to animate figure skating. The parts in round brackets are exactly like they are in the original text, it’s not something I added.

***If you wish to share this translation please do it by reblogging or posting a link to it*** 
***Re-translating into other languages is ok but please mention that this post is the source***

He’s going to leave a mark in Thai’s skating history with his blades!

Phichit Chulanont voiced by Kenshou Ono

Profile Date of birth: April 30th, 20 years old Height: 165 cm Blood type: B Thai

Introduction A new hope for Thailand, that didn’t have any skaters who got remarkable results. His popularity is quickly growing also thanks to his spontaneous and pleasant skating style that mirrors his friendly personality. This season he is skating both his short program and free to songs from the movie “The King and the Skater”, which is something he had always dreamed of doing. He is the first Thai skater to have succeeded in a quadruple jump and he also obtained his first Grand Prix victory. He is continuing to rewrite Thai’s figure skating history. He used to train under Celestino in Detroit, but from this season he has moved his base back to Thailand. He loves hamsters and has a lot of them. Posts about them can be seen on his SNS. The lethal weapon made of sex appeal that shines on the ice.

Christophe Giacometti voiced by Hiroki Yasumoto

Profile Date of birth: February 14th, 25 years old Height: 183 cm Blood type: undisclosed Swiss

Introduction 10 years since he moved to the senior class, he is one of the world’s best skaters fighting for the top. Beside his quadruple Lutz and his characteristic sexy moves, he is also praised for his unique and precise spins. As a veteran, he never breaks down too much, but he is a slow starter and tends to not perform at his best in the Grand Prix series, which is held in the first half of the season. Last year he came in 2nd in both the Grand Prix Final and the World Championships. With his long-time rival Nikiforov missing this season, he is one of the candidates to snatch the king’s throne. He is a popular skater who captures the hearts of women all over the world with his passionate and alluring performances that ooze the sex appeal of a grown-up man. He has a cat. To become, one day, China’s hero.

Guang-Hong Ji voiced by Yuutarou Honjou

Profile Date of birth: January 7th, 17 years old Height: 160 cm Blood type: O Chinese

Introduction A growing 17-years-old who moved to the senior class this season. In the Grand Prix’s America tournament he placed 3rd, achieving the amazing feat of standing on the podium on his debut performance. The success rate of his quadruple jumps, which he started training for this season, is also high, and as China’s new ace he is expected to grow further in the second half of the season. He has a shy personality, but at the same time he also uploads many selfies on the SNS. It seems that he also bought a lot of clothes during his training camp in Canada. Together with his friend Chulanont from Thailand and Japan’s Minami, he is called by fans “one of Asia’s 3 cutest skaters”. YURI!!!’s TOPIC

TOPIC 1: Grand Prix Series It consists in a total of 7 tournaments: 6 tournaments held in different countries every year from the end of October to the end of November, and the final that sees the 6 skaters who got the highest scores in the other tournaments as its participants. The 6 tournaments are always held in the same countries (the order may vary), but the location of the final changes every year, and this season it’s Barcelona in Spain. The participants are chosen based on their results in tournaments regulated by ISU (International Skating Union), their world ranking, recommendations by the host country etc.; however, each skater can only participate in a maximum of 2 tournaments. In addition, only up to 3 skaters from the same country can participate in the same category of the same tournament. The period when the skaters’ allocation is announced is somewhat of a festival among skating fans.

*It’s night in Japan when the skaters’ allocation is announced *The first 6 tournaments are held in 6 countries over the span of 6 weeks *In every tournament skaters receive points depending on their placement (15 points for the 1st place, 13 points for the 2nd place and so on), and the final ranking decides who will participate in the final

TOPIC 2: Quadruple Jump (*at the moment of the Russia tournament) One of the techniques that decide the game in male figure skating is quadruple jumps. Since the number and type of jumps greatly influences the score, recently it’s common for skaters to include multiple quadruple jumps in their programs. However, according to the rules the same jump can only be repeated a limited number of times, therefore skaters try new types of jumps and train hard to be able to have more quadruple jumps to put in their programs. Currently, 5 types of jumps except for the Axel have been successfully landed in official competitions. The one with the highest score is the Lutz, which top skaters such as Victor, Giacometti and JJ are using in their programs. The quadruple toeloop, which has the lowest score, is successfully used by young skaters such as Kenjirou Minami, Guang-Hong and Phichit too. Yuuri can jump the toeloop and Salchow and is currently training to master Victor’s trademark flip. After the Lutz, the flip is the jump with the highest score.

*Yurio in his junior years getting scolded for jumping a quadruple that was not planned *Seung-gil is the first who successfully landed a quadruple loop *Emil is a jumper that has 4 quadruples in his free *JJ jumps an amazing quadruple Lutz in the second half of his program *Victor uses as his weapons 4 types of quadruples, except for the Axel and loop (in the EX he landed a loop too)

TOPIC 3: Support Item (cheering goods) It often happens to spot flags and banners used as cheering goods in figure skating venues. After a performance flower bouquets and plushes are also thrown into the rink. Banners do not only feature the skater’s name and flag; sometimes they have a message or a portrait of the skater with which people try to show their support, and in some cases they are even made using photographs. Yuuri is often thrown plushes of food. The bouquets and plushes are picked up by children who are learning skating, usually called “flower girls” and “flower boys”.

*JJ’s cheering group, called JJ girls. *Yurio’s hardcore fans are called Yuri angels. *Flags are basic items. Some fans bring different types. *Present snacks from fans for Yuuri who is on a diet? *After popular athletes skate the flower girls and boys have a hard time picking up everything *Sometimes skaters will actually put on the items that are thrown into the rink

TOPIC 4: Kiss & Cry The kiss & cry is where skaters wait for their score after a performance. The name comes from the fact that it’s a place where athletes can experience both happy and sad feelings. Normally the skater and their coach will sit there, but in some cases there might be people from a country’s federation or the choreographer too. In many venues there will be a microphone, therefore skaters can also send messages to their family and fans. If you listen to the broadcast closely you might be able to hear the athlete and coach reviewing the performance or other conversations.

*Sometimes the coach might strike a pose too *It’s also a place where athletes vow to make up for a defeat *”Please support me!” addressed to the viewers *The JJ style gesture in the kiss & cry is a recurrence *Michele’s sister Sara can be seen in the kiss & cry too Chief director / Screen designer Jun Shishido & Yuusuke Tannawa interview

I want to make the gag scenes dynamic. (Shishido) The opening of episode 11 was possible thanks to the viewers’ response. (Tannawa)

Shishido: I’m the chief director, but in fact I did a lot of things. Director Yamamoto was too busy, so she mainly did sound and editing, and then since it’s an original story she focused on the story composition… Tannawa: Shishido-san was like the site supervisor. We would ask things related to the story itself to director Yamamoto, but the one who actually took action and gave directions was Shishido-san. Though in the credits I appear as “screen designer”, the anime’s screen design was created by the director of photography, and my job in this series mainly consisted in creating the footage for PVs, OP etc. and checking the final product before delivery. I started working on the PV at the beginning of 2016. I asked director Yamamoto what kind of layout she had in mind, and decided how to set the visuals of the series. Regarding the contents of the episodes I also discussed with Shishido-san about various topics – for example, “this processing can be done with camerawork, this expression can be recreated with CG” – and shared this information with the involved work groups.

-Trial and error to create the huge amount of skating scenes.-

T: In figure skating athletes perform while continuously moving around, therefore it was extremely difficult to understand where an athlete was and in what direction he was skating in each frame. In the 1st episode we created a CG model of the skater based on the real choreography footage and had it skate in a rink created with 3DCG, then we followed it with tridimensional camerawork and used that footage as a base for the animation. It was a very elaborate process. However, we realized that it was impossible to continue using this method with the production schedule of a TV series, therefore we switched to a different method where we would create camerawork on a general background map. Also, after episode 5, for certain characters we preceded the creation of the key animation with 3DCG. The final animation is all done by hand, but by having a base to use as a reference it was possible to calculate the available time frame and create the animations accordingly, thus shortening the working time. S: Even if you suddently ask the 3D staff to create figure skating animation, of course they have almost no knowledge of the jumps and techniques. They create the animation based on the reference footage, but they cannot express complex details such as how athletes balance their feet the moment they jump, so for that I and (figure skating animators) Abiko-san and Tatenaka-san adjusted the animation. Among the people working on the series, the only ones who had technical knowledge about figure skating were the 3 of us and director Yamamoto. And it’s not something that you can just explain verbally, so we took on all those jobs ourselves. We checked… everything, probably. Actually, until episode 4 the skating scenes were all created by Abiko-san and Tatenaka-san, so I didn’t need to check them, but from episode 5 the amount of skating scenes became so huge that we asked Tannawa-san and the others whether we could get help from the CG team… I completely trusted Tannawa-san, because I knew that if we explained what to do he would understand what was needed. T: I basically asked what they couldn’t do, and we did all we could to make up for that and reduce their workload. We would never have finished the series otherwise. That’s why for this anime no one ever said “isn’t that your job?”. For every episode, everyone just fought toward completion. S: Everyone took responsibility for their job and worked with extreme care, like no one was going to double-check what they did afterwards. We thought, “if we don’t do our best, this series will not make it to the broadcast, therefore we must all be responsible and work hard”…

-A scene you especially paid attention to.-

S: All the storyboards for the skating scenes were drawn by the director, but I drew them for quite a lot of daily life scenes. I especially like the scene where Yurio gives a pirozhki to Yuuri (in episode 9). I was particularly careful to make Yurio look cute. I wanted to show that, even though normally he is rude (to Yuuri), he actually rather trusts him and they do get along. I also like gag scenes, so I had fun with scenes such as the hug competition at the end of episode 9. Gag scenes do not need to be drawn as neatly as serious scenes, therefore I decided to animate them in a very comical and dynamic way. T: I paid a lot of attention to the opening. The way we changed it in episode 11 to reflect the current story development is something I myself suggested to the director. Actually, only the opening of episode 1 was still incomplete when it was broadcasted. From episode 2 onwards it was always the same footage, but the viewers wrote a lot of comments about it (and were wondering whether it was changing every time). Since everyone was watching it every time without skipping it, we decided to really change it in the end. S: My favorite character is Georgi Popovich! He’s a man who can talk about love seriously. He actually makes a few appearances since the 1st episode. When we were working on episode 1 we only had Kubo-sensei’s character plans and the storyboard saying “a character named Popovich is standing here”. We made him stand out a little because we understood that he would show up in the story later on. And what a character he was, when he was introduced in episode 6! T: He was so striking that I was actually shocked! I like Popovich too. Also, among the programs, I like Yuuri’s FS “Yuri on ICE”. It’s the first song I listened to working for this series, and at that time I used it for the PV without knowing that it was going to be Yuuri’s FS. In the PV Yuuri is skating in Hasetsu with his slender appearance from episode 3 onwards, and (the character designer) Hiramatsu-san commented “it’s a wonderful video, but now we have to make him fat”. I remember thinking “what is he saying??” (LOL).

-The power of the support that reached the studio.-

S: When we were creating the anime we were so busy with the work at hand that we didn’t really realize how much of a response the series was having. However, we received lots of presents, food, goods and letters of support from fans. T: Even items based on the contents of the series, like (retort-packed) borscht. That made us feel that fans were really supporting us because they liked the series, and it boosted our morale. Knowing that there were so many people watching and cheering on us motivated us to our best even it meant working overnight without sleeping. S: The charm of this series is the love of the original creators, director Yamamoto and Kubo-sensei, that you can feel from it. It’s just so strong. T: It also feels like you are touring various countries to follow Yuuri and the others and watch their matches. You can watch it with the eyes of a spectator and think “I didn’t know a lot about this athlete, but now I see how he skates”. I think that another element that allows viewers to really get into the world of the series is how not only the matches but also the skaters’ practice scenes and the back yard are drawn with lots of details. Everything is detailed, even the different shape of each skater’s blades. The director herself is full of very sincere love for figure skating, and that was transmitted to both the staff and the viewers. S: The animation studio had a very nice atmosphere. It’s the first time that I’m working with Tannawa-san, but when I saw his work I realized right away that he was someone I could trust. Trust and unity are something you find in the staff of many series, but for this one it was especially strong.

On a side note, Kubo & Yamamoto went to see the Worlds in Helsinki and are now in St.Petersburg. I am confident it’s tourism but with a spoonful of location hunting... (What a timing, though. I hope none of you or your acquaintances were personally affected by what happened the other day in the subway)

[lookatthesetreasures]

a quiet life, a lonely life, a loving life

This fic is for kazliin​, who is an incomparable goddess and responsible for the amazing Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches, one of the best yuri on ice fanfics. It’s been a wild ride these past few months, and everything you gave us, we want to give back, in as many ways as we can. I hope you like this, and everything else we’ve made you <3 <3 <3 

i wrote this in between Chapter 13 and 14, so a lot of it got spectacularly jossed. but by the time chapter 14 came out i had already written 4k of it OTL. it seems a shame not to put it out, if only to show kaz that her fic has been pushing us to create and produce even before UMFB officially ended. 

EDIT: it’s kazliin’s birthday today, and i only found out! happy birthday kaz and thanks for everything in the rivals verse you are a gift. 

a quiet life, a lonely life, a loving life 

Summary: Morooka has been following Yuuri’s career. He doesn’t plan to stop.

A Quiet Place to Rest: Katsuki Yuuri in the Aftermath of Scandal

Figure skating is a sport that doesn’t attract general attention, but in March 2017, figure skating dominated the major headlines of the Japanese news. Japan’s ace skater, Katsuki Yuuri,  was accused of doping during a World Championship hosted in Tokyo – the news traveled, and traveled fast. Only hours after the story broke, Japan and the whole world watched as Katsuki’s free skate fell apart in the midst of the greatest scandal in ISU history.

They are the most celebrated rivalry in figure skating history, surpassing even Yagudin and Pluschenko in intensity and sheer achievement: Katsuki Yuuri and Viktor Nikiforov, the two figure skating legends of the age. So when scandal broke out, it was vicious. Social media condemned Nikiforov and Katsuki in turns, while the news media scrambled to fact check the leaks.

Nikiforov’s coach Yakov Feltsman registered a complaint against Katsuki, claiming that Feltsman caught Katsuki red-handed, performance-enhancing pills halfway to his mouth. A mole within the ISU saw to it that the investigation leaked, and within hours the whole of Katsuki’s medical records was exposed.

Katsuki made no public comment. He ignored the press even as questions were screamed at him from the rink side. He skated his free program, graceless and lifeless, and after getting his scores he turned his back on the ice. He disappeared from the public eye, and after the World Championships, no one heard from Katsuki for months.

~

I went into Sports Journalism in 2007, and the very first international competition I was assigned to cover was the 2007 Grand Prix Final. In the Seniors’ division, the outlook was abysmal for Japan; Oda Nobunari had been withdrawn from competitions by the JSF following his arrest that year, Arakawa Shizuka had just retired after her medal in the 2006 Winter Olympics. Of the greats of the time, only Takahashi Daisuke had qualified. However, despite Japan’s limited chances at a podium finish, the GPF was promising to be exciting.  Chinese skater Cao Bin was dominating Asia, Stephane Lambiel had finally  recovered from his injuries of the previous season, and Viktor Nikiforov was beginning the quads arms race with his new quad flip. I wanted to cover that event, but as the newest reporter in the station, I was told to cover the juniors division instead. Yamaguchi Hiroshi (now part of ITV 4) was brought in for seniors.

That year, there were only two Japanese skaters in the junior division: in ladies’ singles, there was Nagano Sayo, who placed second that year but ultimately dropped from competitive skating. The other was Katsuki Yuuri.

It was only his junior debut, and so most of the media had yet to take notice of this junior athlete in a sport that was rapidly losing popularity. As far as I know, I was the only Japanese reporter to cover the Juniors events, and after the short program I thought I understood why. Nagano, despite her first place finish in both her qualifiers, seemed to be performing on a much lower standard than previous, and Katsuki gave an underwhelming performance in his short program, falling on several of the jumps. Going into the free program the following day, I was complaining to Yamaguchi about how disappointing their performances were.

I was expecting very little. But when Katsuki took center ice, it was obvious that something had changed. Gone was the childish fumbling of the day before, gone was the palpable fear before every jump. He didn’t skate a clean program, but everyone who watched was shaken by the beauty and grace of his dancing. At fourteen years old, Katsuki already had the effortless elegance on the ice that would later become his trademark as a world champion figure skater.

[IMAGE: Yuuri in the final pose of his debut FS]

I caught up to him for an interview. He blushed, said that he could do better, and apologized for disappointing Japan with a fifth place finish.

~

Katsuki Yuuri was a shy child, uncomfortable around journalists and uneasy with attention. That’s remained a constant throughout the years; Katsuki is infamous in sports media circles for being difficult to interview – if only because he disappears so quickly after every competition if he isn’t strong-armed into a press conference. In his junior years all interview requests went through his coach Tanaka and met a dead end. Tanaka was kind and gave us regular press releases about Katsuki’s training, but couldn’t get his student to agree to any kind of interview.

Things only got worse when Katsuki won the World Junior Championships. Everyone wanted news of the World Junior Champion, but all the press received was the reports that Katsuki had long since disappeared to Detroit to train under Celestino Cialdini from the Detroit Skate Club.

The next two seasons were agonizing for reporters assigned to cover his career. Katsuki’s senior debut was the most distinguished since Nikiforov’s. A bronze at the World Championships at his senior debut, coupled with the beginnings of his rivalry with Nikiforov? Everyone wanted an exclusive, but Katsuki remained elusive. I remember being at the press conference of the 2010 World Championships, and when I asked him about the now infamous glare, I remember being shut down immediately.

Interviewing Katsuki Yuuri about topics he does not want to discuss is impossible; his ordinarily polite (if not warm) demeanour shuts down and he has no compunctions about stonewalling the interview until his time is up. Viktor Nikiforov would be the one of the many subjects Katsuki will always refuse to address.

[IMAGE: Yuuri glaring at Viktor at the podium]

~

The years went by in a hail of medals for Katsuki, as he and Viktor Nikiforov began their rivalry in earnest. The internet had decreed that the hostility from the 2010 World Championships was a rivalry; Nikiforov and Katsuki both delivered on that expectation and more. Nikiforov unleashed his quad lutz; Katsuki added a Bielmann spin and forced the ISU to clarify their scoring on step sequences. They forced each other along as they left their fellow skaters behind.

[IMAGE: Chris, Yuuri, and Viktor on a podium. Chris looks resigned but happy, Viktor is smiling wide for the camera with gold, and Yuuri looking standoffish but polite with silver around his neck]

Christophe Giacometti – in his own right an outstanding skater, and Switzerland’s best since Lambiel – was heard to half-heartedly complain: “If you’re in an event with Viktor or Yuuri, forget about gold. In the GPF or Worlds, the rest of us shrug and ask each other ‘Well, which one of us is getting bronze this year?’” At any other time in figure skating history Giacometti would have seeded as #1. In the era of the Katsuki-Nikiforov rivalry, he only ranked higher than third when Nikiforov had to sit out a season because of an ankle injury.

Despite his overwhelming success in international skating, Katsuki keeps the same distance with the press. He still refuses to do full length interviews. Neither has he accepted any invitations to feature in other media – no guest appearances in dramas or variety shows. He has no visible social media presence. Aside from his competitions, his only public appearances are his ice shows for the JSF and the occasional ad for his sponsors, the most notable of which are Mizuno and Kose.

“My favorite,” Katsuki confided in me last July, “are the KitKat ads.”

[INSERT IMAGE: A KitKat ad for an ‘Icy Mint Chocolate’ flavour. The add is captioned ‘kittokatsuki’. Yuuri is posing with his Olympic Gold]

~

It’s has now been a month since the 2015 World Championships – and from there you know the story. Pills, doping accusations, the reveal of extremely private medical information. Humiliated and his privacy grossly violated, Katsuki skated in front of his home crowd in second place from the short program, and he dropped to twenty third. Nikiforov, having finished first the previous day, skated last and dropped to twenty fourth.

The backlash had been immediate, intense, and very nearly bloody; Nikiforov and his teammates needed police escort through the Tokyo Haneda Airport. Katsuki disappeared immediately after his free skate, turning his back on Nikiforov in what could be considered this year’s most iconic photograph in sports journalism. He wasn’t at the press conference, or in the ISU banquet after Worlds; he posted a two-sentence statement via his official Twitter

[Embedded Tweet]

@YuuriKatsuki

I will be taking an indefinite break from competitive figure skating. Please excuse my performance at Worlds 2015.

Aside from his first press conference, Nikiforov makes no other public statements; his social media accounts, normally active, appear to have been abandoned. Rumors of a huge fight between coach and skater surface, and only a week after Worlds the news from Russia was that Viktor had parted ways with his coach. Soon after that, Nikiforov was seen everywhere – first in Switzerland to make a visit to his good friend Giacometti, and then in an ill-advised trip that would later be fodder for gossip tabloids, Nikiforov makes a trip to the Detroit Skate Club.

The visit, far from being a quiet pilgrimage of apology, quickly turned viral. Katsuki wasn’t there, and Phichit Chulanont was waiting.

[Insert twitter video. Phichit is screaming and being restrained by a bulky hockey player: “You broke his heart twice [Thai insult]. I told him you were dangerous and you broke his heart twice!”]

The flames of the scandal blew hotter and hotter, until news from Japan was that Katsuki was getting increasing amounts of stalker fans desperate for news about their idol.

I suppose, then, it wasn’t out of the blue that I received an email from Katsuki himself. I packed my bags and left for Hasetsu immediately.

~

Yu-topia is the last onsen in Hasetsu. It’s a small town not often visited by tourists outside of figure skating fans who want to see the hometown of Japan’s ace. It’s very provincial, despite the upgraded train station; Hasetsu Castle dominates the landscape, overlooking the town from craggy mountains, and the cries of seagulls fill the air even in the downtown districts.

Katsuki meets me at the train station, looking pensive and bundled up in a cable-knit sweater despite the warming April weather. He’s brought his dog with him – a toy poodle he calls Vicchan – and immediately comes up to help me with my luggage.

“I’m sorry about the dog,” he apologizes. “He didn’t want me to leave, so I just brought him along.”

It was the hardest part about leaving for Detroit, Katsuki confesses. His friends and family were all incredibly excited on his behalf for the opportunity to grow as a skater, but dogs have no such perspective.

“Everyday he’d wait for me in front of the Ice Castle like he used to. It got so bad that for a few months after I had left, Vicchan was more of Yuuko-chan’s dog than my parents’.”

Celestino Cialdini discovered Katsuki in the JGPF 2007, as most of the figure skating world did. He offered Katsuki a place in his rink on the spot. Katsuki, whose coach Tanaka was returning to retirement, thought the opportunity was not one to waste.

“I love Hasetsu,” he remarks while driving. “But the DSC had a solid reputation, and could get me a scholarship to the University of Michigan. An Olympic skating rink, and a free university education? I wasn’t going to get that here, so I moved. Celestino has been an absolutely amazing coach since.”

Katsuki initially enrolled in the university’s business program – he had planned to come back to the onsen if he had no options after retirement. It wasn’t enough to be an Olympian and a student, however, and two years into his degree, Katsuki suddenly switched to another program: neurobiology. The added subject matter added time to his education; despite it being five years after he moved to Detroit, Katsuki has yet to complete his university degree.

“I’m actually on leave right now,” he admits shyly, and silence descends on the car as he refuses to elaborate.

This is fairly typical behaviour from a Katsuki being interviewed by the press; by now I was fairly used to the rhythms of prying answers out of him. “Why neurobiology?” I prompted.

Katsuki considers the question, and takes a deep breath before answering. “People online have been speculating about my anxiety disorder since the news came out at Worlds. Some of them are saying that it’s new, or recent, but really I’ve had trouble with it since the beginning of my career.”

He tries to smile, but instead it comes out grim. “My mom thought getting me a dog would help me from tgetting so nervous all the time in middle school, and it worked back then. But then I started going into more and more competitions, with bigger and bigger stakes, and it all just compounded until my senior debut. I got this horrible panic attack the day before the free skate, and when we got back to Detroit, Celestino basically forced to get me help.

“I didn’t go, of course, not at first. But then it kept happening, and it wouldn’t stop no matter how hard I tried. So I went.”

This is the most personal information I’ve ever heard from Katsuki. I say nothing, hoping not to break the spell, and am rewarded. He continues, contemplative.

“That was also the time I changed my major. I couldn’t understand what was wrong, why I couldn’t turn off the anxiety in my head like other people do. Dr. Gracechurch, my therapist in Detroit, she suggested taking a class in brain chemistry so I could better understand it. And I guess I wanted to know more, because soon enough I enrolled in enough units to get a minor. I guess I just kept going after that, and here we are.”

~

Katsuki pulls back from the conversation after that. He points out important landmarks as we pass through the streets of Hasetsu with ease, and when I remark upon it he smiles. “When your parents run an onsen, you pick up the tools of the tourism industry quickly.” It had helped him in America upon his arrival there; Katsuki had enough English to get by on the schoolwork, while rinkmate Phichit Chulanont from Thailand struggled with the most basic of coursework.

“Of course it eventually got harder for me. I was in university and learning neurobiology with limited English. That wasn’t fun.”

Learning neurobiology while skating wouldn’t have been either, I point out. Considering the practice hours Katsuki keeps (a whopping thirty hours a week on the ice during the off-season, even more when including off-ice sessions), it seems amazing he made any headway at all into a degree, not when so many skaters choose to forgo university altogether- Viktor Nikiforov included.

“My sister Mari never really showed an interest in getting a higher education, even when my parents really encouraged her to go to university. The DSC may have been the main reason why I went to the University of Michigan, but my parents are definitely what keeps me going through my degree.”

Katsuki Hiroko and Toshiya are Hasetsu natives, running the family hot springs since Toshiya inherited the business from his own parents in the late eighties. They are an old couple now, warm and welcoming when they greeted me as we arrived at Yu-topia.

“Is this Morooka-san?” Hiroko-san asks Katsuki, eyes wide. She shakes my hand enthusiastically after Katsuki’s stuttered confirmation, and pointed to a series of framed newspaper clippings on the wall. A closer look tells me that they’re all articles about Katsuki’s career, and I was surprised to see that the oldest clipping on the wall was that story I wrote long ago, about the promising junior skaters Nagano Sayo and Katsuki Yuuri.

Toshiya-san surprises me again when we were introduced. “My favorite sports writer!” He exclaims. “You cover my favourites! Our Yuu-chan, of course –” he winks at his blushing son, “—and my favorite football team!”

Friday nights in Yu-topia have always been Sagen Tosu nights. Toshiya-san has a fair number of friends who come to the inn and eat katsudon for victory or drink large amounts of sake in defeat. They’ve been doing so for decades now. When Katsuki started competing, it was easy enough to adapt the tradition, and the whole neighbourhood turns out to watch his events on the enormous television they set up in the inn for that very purpose.

“Was sports a big focus for your family?” I ask Toshiya-san over sake that night. He guffaws.

“Hiroko and I met in high school football,” he confides. “She was very competitive then, captain of the varsity team! Yuu-chan reminds me of her back in those days, very focused and driven. Hiroko hated to lose too.”

Team sports, however, were never in the interests of their more introverted children. Mari went into ballet at seven, with her little brother trailing after her the next year.

“Mari gave it up only a few weeks after Yuuri started with Minako-sensei. She did judo in middle school and high school instead, said that it was much more satisfying. She never took it as seriously as Yuuri-kun took figure skating, however.”

Katsuki stayed in ballet for four years before stepping into an ice rink and falling in love, if you trust Hiroko-san to tell the story. Soon enough, as Katsuki shot through school, he was spending more time in the ballet studio or the ice rink than he did in school or at home.

“The day he came home bragging about a double axel was when I knew,” Hiroko-san reminisced with a warm smile. “He was so excited about doing this move or jump and he never was that excited about anything. That’s when I knew my son would devote all his life to this sport.”

She produces photographs of a young Katsuki Yuuri with little prompting, much to Katsuki’s embarrassment. There is one photo particularly striking, of an eight year-old Katsuki at the barre with the most eerie expression of concentration on his face. It was only when I began to compile the photographs for this feature that I realized what it was.

Nearly a decade and a half later, Katsuki practices at barre with the exact same expression on his face.

[IMAGE: Comparison of two photos. Yuuri at 8 and 23]

~

I was to stay in Hasetsu for three days, and that first night I spent in the company of the Katsuki family. Hiroko and Toshiya were wonderful dining companions; a lifetime in the hospitality industry had settled them into ease with strangers, and I was just another guest who wanted to know more about their famous son.

Katsuki Mari was another story.

Despite his low profile in the media, Katsuki’s private live has always been a source of speculation. His parents are a staple for phone interviews – they cannot resist talking about their son, as proud parents do, and the internet at large has dubbed them the most adorable of celebrity parents. Okukawa Minako, Katsuki’s ballet instructor, has her studio filled with students dreaming to become the next Katsuki. Even his school friend and former rinkmate Nishigori Yuuko is borderline famous on YouTube, being the only source of videos of Katsuki’s early figure skating career.

Katsuki Mari is never approached for these sorts of things. I asked her about her brother’s distinguished skating career once, when I encountered her outside the stadium of the Saitama World Championships. I remember her, smoking lazy rings of smoke across the parking lot. “Of course I’m proud. Was there any other response you wanted?”

It was easy to see the family resemblance. Mari and Yuuri look nothing alike, and yet they both dam up a conversation with the same ease.

The day after I arrive in Hasetsu, however, it is Mari-san who knocks on my door at six in the morning. Framed against the early morning sunlight and already smoking, Mari-san asks me: “Do you want to follow my brother through his training routine?”

I was up and at breakfast before Katsuki was even out of bed.

~

Shadowing an athlete through training is pretty common in sports, especially in the off-season. It’s a good way to intimidate opponents and increase interest in a team or athlete during the times when their fans have no competitions to look forward to, often for months at a time.

Several skaters have taken advantage of this before; Stephane Lambiel did a documentary after recovering from the hip injury that took him out in 2008, and Team Russia does an annual feature on their most promising juniors about to debut. Last year’s feature? Yuri Plisetsky, who said on international television: “Why would my favorite skater be Viktor Nikiforov, he’s an idiot. No, Katsuki has better steps and even Viktor knows it.”

Katsuki has never done anything like this. The only glimpses we have of his training are official press releases and the social media accounts of his rinkmates. He’s something of an Easter egg in Phichit Chulanont’s Instagram – or as Chulanont calls it, #spottheyuurikatsuki. Although Katsuki shares the ice of the DSC with a handful of other skaters and a hockey team, Chulanont is widely known to be the only other figure skater Katsuki would share ice time with.

He blushes when I bring it up. “I just don’t like it when people watch me skate,” he stutters.

It seems a strange answer for someone who competes in international televised competitions.

“That’s different,” he insists. “In practice you really need to focus on training, and when people are around I get nervous, especially when I’m doing things I’m not very confident at yet.”

Take his training in quads. “It was the year after my last juniors, and I just started at the DSC.” Katsuki fails to mention that it was also the season where he swept the junior golds and broke through all the junior records set by Viktor Nikiforov. “That was all the judges and commentators could talk about, that I had no quads in my programs. So when I went to Detroit, everyone was watching. Everyone at the rink would stop what they were doing when I started the set-up for a quad, and when I fell…” He reddens and clams up. I give up on finding out more, and make a note to contact Phichit Chulanont for more information.

~

It isn’t surprising to hear about how much Katsuki was thrown by company. Hasetsu is a tiny town with a tiny population; on his morning run Katsuki meets three of his mother’s friends, an old classmate, and the fisherman on the bridge calls him Yuu-chan. The gym is generally deserted at the hours Yuuri-kun comes in, and at the ballet studio, Okukawa-sensei had already given him a key.

He had much the same situation in the rink. Before moving to Detroit his home rink had been Ice Castle Hasetsu, and in such a small town, there were no other winter athletes who needed the rink as much as he did. Often times he skated only with the Nishigoris, Takeshi and his wife Yuuko. Takeshi, whose parents managed the place when Katsuki was still training in Japan, often let Yuuri sneak into the rink at off hours.

In return for Nishigori’s generosity, Katsuki attributes much of his growth as a skater to the married pair. “Yuuko-chan introduced me to skating,” he tells me. “And they let me in here when they didn’t have to. I’ll forever be in their debt.”

~

It’s a five mile run from the onsen to the Ice Castle, and once Katsuki arrives there’s stretching and more cardio before he steps on the ice.

“But I thought you were taking a break?” I ask him. “In any case, do you have a coach while you’re here?”

“This is basic conditioning to keep me limber,” he explains. “As far as next season is concerned, there haven’t been any solid plans yet. Phichit-kun wants to move back to Thailand and has already asked Celestino to come with him if I don’t return to Detroit.”

It’s an ominous declaration to hear from one of your favorite athletes, and I don’t press the issue. Katsuki continues on with his cardio, and after Takesh-sani pushes him into the deeper stretches, he straps on his skates and heads for the ice.

There’s nothing fancy on the program for this morning, and Katsuki seems content to carve out compulsory figures on the ice. If Katsuki were competing in the ‘60’s he would be the undisputed champion; his compulsory figures are a work of art and he does them with such obvious ease.

“Why compulsory figures?” I ask him as he skates to the boards for a water break.

“I always get that question,” he remarks. “But it’s usually other figure skaters who ask me. The press isn’t that interested.”

It’s not quite true. Every time I have been granted a pass to the training days of ISU events, I have always wanted to ask about the compulsory figures that Katsuki does without fail at the beginning of every practice session. I went through my old notes and files from Katsuki’s competitions, and the question appears fairly regularly. I’ve definitely asked him the question once before, in the press conference after the 2013 Four Continents.

In my notes he answers much the same way: “I don’t see how my compulsory figures are that remarkable.” Around the globe, figure skaters are rolling in their graves.

In the present day Katsuki laughs it off once more, shrugging and saying that it’s just something he likes to do. When the source refuses to speak, however, I am obliged to seek out new ones, and so I consult with Nishigori Yuuko.

“We learned figures from our first coach, who had to do compulsory figures back in the day and told us it would be good for our edges. Takeshi and I never had much patience for it, but Yuuri-kun always found them calming, I suppose. Most of his late-night ice time is just for compulsory figures.”

~

Yuuko-san is a wealth of information, although she refuses to say anything on topics Katsuki has declared off-limits. She says much on the subject of Katsuki’s early training, and even takes me to the small glass case in Ice Castle Hasetsu containing Katsuki’s first pair of skates, impossibly tiny and well-worn. She points out the running trails Katsuki-san has used since early childhood, and takes me to see their old middle school when Katsuki-san gently evicts me from the rest of his training session.

“Don’t feel too bad,” she consoles me. “The only reason he doesn’t practice alone is the risk of injury, but if he had his way he’d never skate in front of a crowd at all.”

It’s the second time this comes up, Katsuki’s aversion to bystanders. I ask Yuuko-san about it too, and she shrugs. “Not all of us can see clearly into the way that Yuuri-kun thinks and feels; he’s always been incredibly private. That said, Yuuri-kun has always been driven and keen to prove himself, and I think that’s what drives him into competition.”

I see an opening, and casually mention “So he’s always been competitive?”

Yuuko-san catches my eye and I see that there’s no fooling the Ice Castle’s Madonna. She throws me a bone anyway. “Not in the way that you think. He hates to lose, that’s true, but usually the frustration is directed inward. He wants to be the best; we all have, at one point or another. Yuuri-kun just never gave up on that.”

I itch to ask her about Viktor Nikiforov, but I hold my tongue. She says nothing.

But she gives me tapes of Katsuki’s early skating recitals.

Later that night, after borrowing an old VHS player from the Katsuki’s, I settle down in my room to watch the recordings. The first tape begins adorably, as videos of young children do, but I am not surprised by the poise Katsuki has on the ice. This is the beginnings of Katsuki Yuuri, figure skating legend, I tell myself.

The last one is unlabelled, only dated, which strikes me as strange. The previous tapes had been carefully labelled by Yuuko-san’s mother in spidery handwriting, but this one was blank and had different casing.  

On screen, a twelve-year old Katsuki Yuuri skates to center ice, still with stubborn baby fat clinging to his middle. The music plays, and  jolt of electricity runs through my spine. Katsuki moves beautifully and with a skill well beyond his years, but I hardly notice.

Katsuki Yuuri, at twelve years old, was skating Viktor Nikiforov’s O Mio Babbino Caro.

~

As I shadow Katsuki around Hasetsu, it’s quickly becoming clear that Viktor Nikiforov is the ghost haunting the town. You can see the outlines of Nikiforov in the boundaries that people don’t cross, invisible landmines they avoid.

“Ah, Yuuri-chan!” Fujino-san at the market smiles warmly at Katsuki, who runs small errands for his mother in the hours between his morning training on the ice and evening sessions with Okukawa-sensei. “It’s lovely to see you up and about again after that horrible business in March.”

Katsuki blushes, mumbles some reply about keeping busy, and makes a hasty retreat with his mother’s package.

Nakashima-san, the old fisherman on the bridge, obliquely mentions the ‘Russian hooligan who made Yuu-chan leave his training’. The Nishigori’s children, triplets who inherited the interest in figure skating from their parents, debate on the possibilities of the next season in hushed tones, and yet they manage to avoid speculation on Viktor Nikiforov’s rumored retirement.

Now that I know what i’m looking for, however, it’s easier to see the traces of Nikiforov that stubbornly cling to Katsuki’s skating. On the second day of practice, Katsuki seems unnerved and frustrated; unlike the careful footwork of the day before, he focuses instead on his jumps.

With O Mio Babbino Caro fresh on my mind, it’s easier to see the spot it: the setup for the flip is familiar, as is the landing of the Salchow. An idea starts to sprout in my mind, and the next time that Katsuki skates to the boards, I ask him: “Where did you start learning how to do your jumps?”

Katsuki’s eyes widen, but he answers easily. “Coach Tanaka began training me on jumps when I was about thirteen. The videos are on Yuuko’s YouTube channel, I think.”

At the time of Nikiforov’s last junior season, the season he had used O Mio Babbino Caro as his free skate, Katsuki would have been twelve. And when Katsuki skated that program, there had definitely been jumps; downgraded to doubles and singles, definitely, but the jumps were there all the same.

~

Over the years, Katsuki had developed a reputation for being unsociable among his fellow skaters.

His presence on social media is an aberration at a time when Phichit Chulanont exists. Although Chulanont is Exhibit A of the hyperactive social media user, most other figure skaters are often found on these networks as well. Chulanont and Giacometti have hundreds of thousands of followers on Instagam, Yuri Plisetsky is the king of Tumblr, and Minami Kenjirou has a YouTube vlog dedicated entirely to figure skating and Katsuki Yuuri.

The only other major figure skater as absent on social media is Otabek Altin from Kazakhstan.

“I like Otabek,” Katsuki remarks. “He’s very considerate.” I want to ask him about Altin’s silver medal at the ill-fated Worlds, but I bite my tongue.

This reserve extends also to his offline life; Katsuki has a large number of devoted fans, but they stay at polite distances from him at all time. Later, I see Maeda-san, one of the onsen’s few employees, berating a small group of girls she found sneaking behind the onsen’s walls.

Katsuki hardly notices them.

I begin to see he hardly notices anything. Perhaps it’s the shocks from last March still taking time to process, but Katsuki is one of the most introverted people I have ever met, deeply engrossed in his own thoughts and hardly ever venturing out. On the ice, it’s easy to miss: he has an almost bombastic presence in competition. It’s impossible to look away from his skating, and one gets the feeling that Katsuki is revelling in his power to enthrall the audience.

[Insert image from Rostelecom Eros]

Off the ice, however, it seems as if Katsuki shrinks into himself, actively trying to make himself less noticeable. Off the ice Katsuki will allow his shoulders to slouch, will adopt a less commanding posture. Off the ice, Katsuki lets his hair fall into his eyes, and he wears large prescription lenses in cheap, plastic frames. It’s easy to mistake him for someone else -- I’ve seen it happen to some of the newer reporters. They crowd at the entrances to stadiums or at the airport, waiting for a quote, all the while Katsuki strides past without comment, hair down and bundled up in a nondescript sweater.

I mention this to him, and make a joke about his being the Clark Kent of figure skating.

He laughs. Katsuki is tying on his skates, about to head out into the ice for an afternoon of jump practice. I laugh too; it’s funny watching him laugh it off even as I watch the transformation with my own eyes.

~

Later that night I show him Minami’s YouTube account. The Katsuki’s and various other friends, gathered together in a banquet hall at Yu-topia, scream with laughter at Katsuki’s red-faced embarrassment.

“I’m so happy I could die,” Minami wails at the camera, brandishing his silver medal. “I got second place, and Katsuki-senpai touched my arm. I’m never washing the jacket again!”

“Why is he so happy?” Katsuki demands frantically. It’s frankly amazing that Katsuki had been unaware of Minami’s vlog; Minami is one of his biggest fans and online, Katsuki’s fans tend to congregate around pages that Minami moderates.

Okukawa-sensei apparently thinks the same, because she only laughs at him harder. “I can’t believe Phichit hasn’t showed you this yet! I can’t believe you haven’t Googled yourself yet, this channel is one of the first things that pop out in the search results.”

Katsuki flushes deeply. He mumbles some excuse, that Cialdini monitors his internet usage tightly and that he’s been forbidden from Googling himself in Detroit.

For a skater so deeply affected by the energy of others, it’s a wise move. But the same maneuver also left Katsuki unaware of the massive fanbase behind him. Whether it’s a direct product of Katsuki’s permanent ban from Googling himself, or merely because Katsuki doesn’t pay attention is unclear.

But it’s not just that Katsuki doesn’t pay attention. It becomes clear to me that there’s something else preventing Katsuki from getting a solid hold on his own fame. Going through my old interviews with Katsuki confirms it.

“I don’t see how my compulsory figures are remarkable,” Katsuki had told me in the 2013 Four Continents Championship, blinking at me owlishly.

“I did not perform my best today. I apologize to Japan for disappointing their hopes. I will do better next year.” He punctuates this speech with a deep bow, body still pudgy and soft at fourteen.

“Please excuse my performance at the 2015 Worlds,” he wrote, after sustaining the most intrusive offense against his person in the form of leaked medical information.

“I don’t understand why Minami-kun is so excited about sitting next to me,” Katsuki says weakly after watching Minami’s ecstatic video about sitting next to Katsuki at the Japanese Nationals. “It’s not that big a deal.”

~

A new picture of Katsuki is emerging: quiet, painfully shy. He is a quiet and considerate young man, always glad to be helpful to his parents and others. His fame embarasses him; he doesn’t understand how people can come to admire him.

He is incredibly dedicated to his sport, and incredibly dedicated to his friends. But it takes a lot for him to open up, and words are definitely not his strong suit. He says one thing and means another; he has secrets he likes to hold close and facts about himself that he considers irrelevant.

This is a much deeper understanding of Katsuki than I have ever gotten. But all this has yet to explain where Viktor Nikiforov comes into the picture.

~

On the last day of my stay in Hasetsu, I follow Katsuki to the rink wordlessly and sit at the bleachers, watching. He does his jumps, his steps; once you realize the influence, it’s impossible to deny Nikiforov’s ghost, skating on the rink alongside Katsuki.

He goes through a succession of old programs -- the Lohegrin program a smiling callback to Minami Kenjiro, filmed by the Nishigori triplets to be uploaded in response to Minami’s latest video. After sometime, Katsuki queues up some music, and halfway through his session, a familiar melody plays.

“Isn’t this the melody for On Love: Eros?” I ask, confused. Instead of the sensual guitars and violins of Katsuki’s last short program, the instrumentation of this arrangement skews toward the a different aural profile: a soprano chanting a Latin prayer, organs, and other woodwinds create an ethereal effect.

Katsuki skates towards me to reply. “Eros is only part of a series of arrangements. The overall theme is On Love, and it’s about the different kinds of love. This one is Agape.”

He queues the song again, and heads back to center ice before it plays.

If Eros was a homage to sexual love, Agape is focused on a different concept: unconditional love. There is something profoundly emotional in Katsuki’s skating, in the graceful lines he carves on ice and illustrates with his body. It’s a depth of feeling that overwhelms, and by the end of his performance I have tears in my eyes.

My camera hangs limp in my hands; for once, I am happy that I did not record it.

“Morooka-san!” Katsuki calls from the rink. “What did you think of the new program?”

It takes me a while to respond.

“It was honest,” I finally say. It was a performance that could have only come from a genuine part of his heart.

Katsuki pauses, seems to consider my answer. “Do you think I’m honest?”

One of the things I have learned of Katsuki is that he says one thing and means another; he has secrets he keeps close to his heart. “Not in your words,” I concede. But his performances? They have only ever been as honest as he could make them.

“Is there anything else you want to ask me?”

There are many questions I could ask, but I know that at this point, there is only one that matters. My throat feels as dry as a desert, but I force the words out.

“Where did you learn your jumps?”

~

Katsuki is ten, Yuuko-san is twelve. Katsuki is going to be a danseur and win a Benois de la Danse, like Okukawa-sensei. But since Yuuko-san is his friend, Katsuki comes to Ice Castle Hasetsu to skate with her anyway.

There is an old television in the skaters’ lounge, and one day Yuuko-san is watching the Junior Grand Prix Final. The last performer is a young skater from Russia making his junior debut, his hair fanning out in a silver halo as he finishes his last combination spin.

“And that’s when I knew,” Katsuki admits fourteen years later, sounding like the admission was being pulled from between his teeth.

“That’s when I knew that he would change my life.”

~

By the end of Nikiforov’s junior days something had changed; something had soured in Katsuki’s admiration of Nikiforov. “It doesn’t matter what it was,” Katsuki said tiredly. “It was stupid, but we were children. And after, I was too young and too blind to see clearly.”

~

“I wish I could say that I didn’t hate him before,” Katsuki confesses.

~

He doesn’t tell me the whole story -- again, typical. Instead he shares with me some fragments of his fraught relationship with Viktor Nikiforov. The only parts of this story that has never had extensive media coverage was the story from before Katsuki’s junior debut; a brief encounter with a childhood idol that had somehow soured that affection.

“He and I have talked about this before already,” Katsuki tells me. “If I’m to be truly honest, we haven’t hated each other in a long time. Things have changed between us, and it was still changing when --”

“The scandal.”

“That wasn’t Viktor’s fault,” Katsuki says immediately. “Or Coach Feltsman’s. It was a misunderstanding, and it was being clarified when all the leaks went live. If anyone’s to blame it’s the person who leaked the information, and believe me, he will be held accountable.”

“So you don’t blame Nikiforov at all?”

“No,” he says firmly. “It was an understandable misunderstanding, even if in the end it was very damaging to both Viktor and me.”

“Have you spoken to him at all since Worlds?”

Katsuki flushes. “Not yet,” he says quietly. “Agape was for him, because -- because --” Frustrated, Katsuki rubs at his eyes.

“I’m not good with words. I’m not really good at saying stuff, but maybe, with this program…”

~

That afternoon, I pack my bags again, and this time it’s Mari-san who drives me to the train station. She smokes inside of her car, cranking the window down and blowing smoke out to the road.

There is silence in the car, and suddenly she asks me. “Did you get what you need?”

The past few days have been ripe with revelation. I nod furiously.

“Good.” She takes a deep drag from her cigarette. “I’m glad I convinced him to have you.”

Morooka Hisashi is a sports journalist who has written and presented for publications and networks like … He lives in Tokyo and has been covering Katsuki Yuuri through the entirety of Katsuki’s career.

[victuuriporkbowl]

Victuuri Recs #7

One Step Sideways by airgeer (PG-13, 28k) Summary: "Waking up in a world where the best possible turn of events was a literal doppelgänger was not exactly what Victor considered a great morning. The other Victor apparently begged to differ. “Amazing!” he said, poking Victor in the shoulder." Just as Victor and Yuuri are about to start the final dash of preparing for the Grand Prix Final, Victor finds himself in a different reality- one where he, rather than coaching Yuuri, is in the middle of skating his retirement season. They don't know how it happened, or how to fix it, but neither Victor has ever let details like that stop him. [Parallel Universe, *FAVORITE] You Can't Plan for Everything by RivDeV (NC-17, 113k, WIP) Summary: Yuuri forgets that he has a scheduled heat coming up until it's just a couple weeks away. He scrambles to get everything ready in time, including deciding whether he'll spend it alone or with someone. Victor only wants to help. [Omegaverse, *FAVORITE] turn it, leave it, stop, format it by ebenroot (NC-17, 19.6k) Summary: “If you want, I can recommend you some security programs that you can download for free and protect your computer. That way, you won’t be at risk of losing these cute photos of your dog even when you browse websites like ‘Luscious Lonely Wives’.” Victor gives one long ‘haa’. “I don’t browse those websites,” he says through his straining smile. -- the 'i will break any and all electronic devices that get into my hands if it means I get to talk to the cute tech support guy' fic [Tech Support!Yuuri, Dog Groomer!Victor] so this guy walks into a bar... by silvercistern (NC-17, 16k) Okay, okay, okay so you know that trope where a couple pretends to be strangers so that they can seduce each other? Yeah I’m sure you do. It’s been done before. But hear me out: What if they were embarrassingly bad at it? Instead of talking over their future, two grown-ass, married adults pretend to be strangers in a club. Those Three Words by azriona (R, 31k) Summary: Their one night of passion in Sochi left Victor Nikiforov with a bit more of a souvenir than either he or Yuuri Katsuki bargained for. Oops? [Omegaverse] i feel like i win when i lose by renaissance (NC-17, 7.9k) Summary: Yuuri’s life is a mess. He came a spectacular last in the Grand Prix Finals, drank too much at the banquet, initiated no fewer than three dance-offs, took his shirt off, wore his tie like a headband, pole-danced in his underpants, made a fool of himself in front of ISU officials—and now, somehow, he’s Viktor Nikiforov’s booty call. [Canon Divergence] My Name On Your Lips by feelslikefire (NC-17, 31k, WIP) Summary: Yuuri Katsuki has been betrothed to the High King's son, Victor, since he was just a child; furthermore, as an omega, he's forbidden from practicing magic in combat. For years, he's been able to put off the former because the Prince was traveling abroad, and gotten around the latter by practicing with his mentor in secret. Now Victor Nikiforov has finally returned home, and Yuuri is being summoned to the capital for their wedding. He needs a plan to put off marriage long enough to find a way to break the betrothal, while keeping his practicing from being discovered. If only the Prince didn't have other ideas. (Or, the swords-and-sorcery arranged marriage AU. Updates weekly.)[Omegaverse, WIP] Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches by Reiya (NC-17, 147.5k, WIP) Summary: ‘…Of all the rivalries in the world of sports over the years, perhaps none has become so legendary as that of Russian figure skater Viktor Nikiforov and his rival, Japanese Yuuri Katsuki…’ A single event changes the course of Yuuri’s life, throwing him into a bitter rivalry with Viktor Nikiforov that spans across his entire skating career. But as the years go on, rivalry and hatred begin to develop into something very different and Yuuri doesn’t seem to be able to stay away, no matter how hard he tries. Hatred and love are two sides of the same coin and even though everything changes, some things are still meant to be. [Rivals!AU, WIP] He's Going the Distance by Phayte (NC-17, 2.6k) Summary: So... Day Two Prompt for Victuuriweek - LONG DISTANCE was the Prompt with Yuuri... so um... Yuuri, Victor, Phichit and Chris have a 'long distance' contest to see who wins... at your service by anirondack (NC-17, 5.2k) Summary: “That felt really good,” Yuuri says as he shuts the television off on the second try. “Can you do the rest of me?” A Victor standing up, a Victor sitting on the couch next to Yuuri with a glass of wine in his hand or a dog in his lap, would have made a suggestive joke about that. But the Victor on his knees just nods, happy to have direction on how to best please Yuuri, and says, “Of course.” Five thousand words of service sub Victor, plus some sex. [D/s] lie to make me like you by cityboys (R, 80k) Summary: It’s become a game, of sorts, to anyone privy to the fact that the pattern exists in the first place: ask Victor out at the beginning of the month, date for however many days, and wait for the end to come and for Victor to say, always: I couldn’t fall in love with you. Let’s break up. Or, Victor is a retired actor looking for love, and Yuuri happens to be the (un)fortunate soul to unwittingly ask him out at the beginning of the month. Except relationships don't come with a script, and it's much harder understanding love than roles. [Actor!Victor, Ballet!Yuuri Entertainment Industry AU]

[calciseptinefic]

solo and pair

Yuuri!!! On Ice || Victor Nikiforov/Yuuri Katsuki || Hasetsu, Part IX notes: also available on ao3. warnings: character injury

.

part viii

.

The first half of Yuuri's last spring break passes in a blur. He spends his days following the same routine he would during school; the only significant difference is that he sets the alarm on his phone for nine instead of six. The exhausted, purple-blue bags beneath his eyes fade incrementally as he catches up on much needed sleep.

Yuuri tries not to think about his future. He can feel the stress creeping in on the edge of his awareness—an unrelenting pressure—but he ignores it. Instead, he extends his morning runs by another few miles; tries an unfamiliar dance style in Minako's studio; skates until the redness on his feet deepen to bruises.

It is during such a practice that Yuuko calls out to him from the concrete side of the rink wall.

"Here," Yuuko says bluntly when Yuuri skates over. She holds her phone out; her hand shakes. "I just—I'm so sorry, Yuuri, but I thought you'd want to know."

Yuuri feels a flare of panic in his chest at Yuuko's expression. He takes the phone but doesn't immediately look down; instead, he asks, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she assures even as she pushes at Yuuri's hand. "Yuuri—"

Yuuri glances down. Yuuko's phone is open to an article off one of the many ice skating websites she follows and, even without his glasses, Yuuri can clearly see the title:

The Death of Victor Nikiforov?

Dread floods Yuuri's chest like a deluge and makes it hard for him to breathe. "What?" Yuuri croaks. "Yuu-chan—is Victor—?"

"No," Yuuko interjects before Yuuri's reactionary hysteria can build. "He's not—he fell, Yuuri, and it was—it was bad."

Yuuri skips over the first paragraph as quickly as he can. His spoken English is strong but it still takes him time to decipher the latin alphabet. He struggles to pick up the name of Victor's home rink in St. Petersburg and the list of his accomplishments—his eight gold medals and his Olympic aspirations—before the chilling phrase 'was carried off the ice' crops up.

The paragraph goes past the bottom of the screen. Yuuri tries to scroll down to read more but the phone won't read his touch through the thin cotton of his gloves. He makes an inarticulate sound of frustration before using his teeth to pull the cuff over and off his hand; it drops to the ground, forgotten.

Yesterday afternoon during routine practice, Victor Nikiforov was reported to have landed incorrectly when he attempted a quadruple lutz.

"It was horrible," rink mate and fellow mens single figure skater, Georgi Popovich, reported. "Victor's always been good at the technical aspects of the sport. To see him fall—maybe he didn't have enough speed or enough height or—I don't know. I don't know."

Another witness, Oksana Kuznetsov, said, "I didn't see his take-off, so I can't say what was wrong. I saw him land, though. Jumps are quick—a second or less—and you never get the specifics. You only know if it was good or if it was bad. And this was very bad."

Popovich and Kuznestov's disconcertion with Nikiforov's accident echoes throughout the training facility. Nikiforov, who has already experienced an illustrious career despite having recently turned twenty-one, was hoping to win his second consecutive gold medal at Worlds in Los Angeles, California on March 23-29. It would also be his third of the 2008-09 season, following his wins at the Grand Prix Final in Goyang, South Korea, and Europeans in Tallinn, Estonia.

Nikiforov could not be reached for comment. His coach, Yakov Feltsman, released a press statement this morning.

"Victor's injury is currently being assessed," said Feltsman. "We regret that such an incident occurred so soon before competition, but our focus now is making sure that Victor makes a full comeback. Russia will make sure that he has the advice and support of the best doctors and physical therapists available."

Though the severity of Nikiforov's injury is still unknown, Feltsman promised to keep the public informed about Nikiforov's health. We here at Golden Skate, along with the rest of the figure skating community, wish Nikiforov a speedy recovery.

Yuuri is not aware that he is shaking until Yuuko closes her hand around his wrist and gently takes her phone back. Her fingers are surprisingly warm against his exposed skin.

"Do—Do you think he's alright?" Yuuri whispers, his gaze glued to the spot where the ice meets the rink wall. He knows that professional athletes experience injury frequently; most of them are minor, some are bad, and the unfortunate few are career-ending. It is a consequence of pushing one's body to the brink; one day, the body will push back. That it happened to Victor Nikiforov—to the legendary, to the untouchable—is incredibly jarring. "Do you think it's that bad?"

Yuuko is quiet for a minute. When she answers, her voice is as small as his was.

"I don't know," she says.

It is a hard truth to swallow.

.

Over the course of the few weeks, Yuuri spends as much time hunched over his phone as he does on the ice. He obsessively refreshes various figure skating news outlets even though there is no new information after Yakov's statement. There are only articles after rehashed articles and forums filled with wild speculation. Every link Yuuri opens makes the sick knot in his stomach wind tighter. He knows that he cannot correlate Victor's health to a lack of news, but logic doesn't prevent his imagination—and his nervousness—from running rampant.

The first mention of Victor after the accident occurs two days before Worlds, in an article Yuuri sees on icenetwork.com. Yuuri doesn't even read the title of the piece; he merely sees Victor's name and pushes down the laptop's touchpad viciously.

Pavel Egorikhin to replace Victor Nikiforov at Worlds

Early this morning, thousands were disappointed when the International Skating Union quietly announced that Victor Nikiforov's spot at Worlds will be given to Pavel Egorikhin.

Egorikhin, 25, announced his retirement earlier in the season after failing to top Nikiforov's qualification score for Europeans. He represented Russia in the 2002 Winter Olympics and earned several medals in the ISU Championships over the course of his eleven year career. Currently, Egorikhin and his family reside in Moscow.

"I am grateful for the opportunity," Egorikhin said. "Skating at such a high level of competition is not something that I thought I would ever do again. I am saddened that it had to come at a price."

The news of the replacement is not a surprise. Six days ago, Nikiforov was escorted off the ice of his home rink in St. Petersburg. His injury was initially treated by the rink's on-site nurse before he was transferred to Medem International. Though the extent of his injury is still unknown, there have been unconfirmed rumors that Nikiforov required surgery.

Yakov Feltsman—Nikiforov's senior coach—could not be reached for comment.

"We will inform the public of Victor's health as soon as we are able," the skating club Nikiforov belongs to stated yesterday. "We are grateful for all the support and well-wishes that we have received."

Since his senior debut in the 2004-05 season, Nikiforov has secured a spot on the podium. The only competition he did not receive a medal at was during the 2006 Winter Olympics, a stellar performance is still widely contested. Despite being in the senior division for only four and a half seasons, Nikiforov is one of figure skating's most decorated athletes.

So what, exactly, does this injury mean for Nikiforov's career?

"Victor is young," said Egorikhin. "This is his first major injury. I do not know the details, but I have seen other skaters return to the ice after terrible accidents. And none of those skaters were as talented or as tenacious as Victor."

Egorikhin's reassurances do little to ease the worry caused by Nikiforov's silence. While it is unlikely that Nikiforov's career would end, there is concern that he would not be able to return to his former glory…

Yuuri stops reading and exits the web browser. It is not a surprise that Victor was replaced—if Victor wasn't well enough to make a public statement, then he wouldn't be well enough to skate—yet Yuuri is still unprepared for the reality of the situation. He feels… unsteady.

I wonder if he's doing okay, Yuuri thinks as he stares at the poster hanging above his desk. It's several years old, a limited edition print of Victor in a plain white jacket and long gray scarf. His arm are wrapped around his poodle—Makkachin—and there is a small but happy smile on his face. Yuuri rubs his aching sternum. He's probably really frustrated.

The thought of Victor lying curled up in a hospital bed makes Yuuri's eyes burn with sudden, unshed tears. When Yuuri sprained his ankle attempting a triple lutz, he hadn't been able to skate for almost two weeks. He cannot imagine what it must be like for a professional skater like Victor.

"Get well soon," Yuuri tells Victor's poster. "Please."

And in the forgiving darkness of his room, Yuuri can pretends that Victor hears him.

.

Worlds comes and goes. Neither Egorikhin nor the other Russian skater make it to the men's podium, and none of the programs have the same magic as Victor's did. There are good compositions, good choreographies, and good techniques, yet it seems to Yuuri that only Victor has the talent to bring all three together flawlessly.

"I liked Cao Bin's performance," Yuuko comments when as they watch the grainy live stream on Yuuko's laptop. Cao Bin is the last skater in the men's division. "He fumbled that last jump, but not everyone can put a quad that late in their program."

The Chinese skater takes gold despite his less than captivating performance. His total score is a full twenty points below what Victor's was the previous year, a fact that makes Yuuri's heart flutter with strange pride. Yet instead of stating this fact aloud, Yuuri says, "He had a good step sequence."

Yuuko bumps her shoulder against Yuuri's. "Not as good as yours," she says.

Yuuri rolls his eyes at her teasing. He knows that his footwork is strong, having originally trained as a dancer underneath Minako, but his skill certainly doesn't outshine a top-tier competitor in the ISU's World Championships. Yuuri does not point this out. Instead, he mumbles, "At least Cao Bin landed a quad."

Yuuko bumps her shoulder into Yuuri's again, this time a little more forcefully. Yuuri nearly falls off the bench they're sitting on.

"Hey!" Yuuri exclaims as he catches himself. "What are you—?"

"Seeing if I can knock some sense into you, Mr. Twentieth in All of Japan," she interrupts. "Or have you forgotten that?"

Yuuri doesn't argue with Yuuko. There's no point. She tends to focus on how far Yuuri has come rather than how far he has left to go; Yuuri may only be seventeen, but in figure skating, nearly half of the best skaters have already been introduced to the international stage.

"No," Yuuri replies. "I haven't."

.

The day after Worlds ends, when Yuuri steps on the ice, he does not practice his developing short program or the beginning pieces of his free skate. Instead, he thinks of Victor's wins at Goyang and Tallinn, and moves.

Yuuri cannot skate Victor's long program perfectly. He has to downgrade all three of Victor's quads to triples and he cannot start the lone triple axel from the spread eagle, yet it is these concessions that allow Yuuri to perform the entire program without hesitation. No mistakes are made as he glides across the ice. He is disappointed that Victor was unable to perform at Worlds, and this sad bitterness beneath his breastbone translates well into Victor's theme of regret.

Yuuri is gasping for breath by the time he finishes. Victor may make his programs look effortless, but in truth, they are usually the most demanding.

"Wow," Nishigori comments faintly when Yuuri skates over to the rink wall to grab his water bottle. "That was… really good."

Yuuri shrugs, too painfully aware that he needs to work on the technical aspects of figure skating to take the compliment. "It was okay," he murmurs. "Could've been better."

Nishigori's thick eyebrows furrow and his mouth turns into a sharp frown. Yuuri recognizes the expression easily; it's the face Nishigori makes when he thinks he's right about something and is prepared to argue. Mentally, Yuuri sighs. He doesn't want to fight with Nishigori, especially not when he feels so weirdly drained by Victor's absence.

Thankfully, Nishigori's oncoming diatribe is interrupted by petite bundle of pink crashing into his side. Nishigori grunts and Yuuko—who ran directly into her fiancé's side—all but screeches, "Yuuri! You have to see this!"

Both Nishigori and Yuuri blink at Yuuko's proffered phone. There's a video loaded onto it, the screen dark and ready to play.

"Seriously, Yuuri," Yuuko says. Her tone brooks no argument. "Take it!"

Yuuri takes the phone warily. He remembers what happened last time Yuuko all but shoved her phone into his hands, and he is reluctant to be blind-sided again. So he asks, "This isn't more bad news, is it?"

In lieu of reply, Yuuko releases a wordless shrill and jabs the play button with an impatient finger. An unfamiliar jingle crashes out of Yuuko's phone, accompanied by a logo that Yuuri has not seen before. It is written in Cyrillic and dominates the tiny screen. It lasts for about five second before the image switches to a well-dressed reporter.

"No subtitles?" Nishigori asks as the reporter begins speaking in indecipherable Russian.

"It just came out thirty minutes ago," Yuuko says. "Now hush."

A minute after the reporter's monologue began, the room they are in explodes into motion and sound. The camera shakes as it tries to focus on a pair of figures entering through a door on the left. Blurry and unfocused, Yuuri does not realize what he is looking at until—

"Victor," Yuuri breathes.

Victor is dressed in plain, comfortable clothing—a pair of gray sweatpants, a soft lavender sweater, and unadorned sneakers—and his long hair is piled into a messy bun atop his head. He should look sloppy and unkempt; instead he looks artfully rumpled. Indeed, the only thing that detracts from his image are the crutches keeping him upright.

"That's not good," Nishigori comments.

Unused to the crutches, Victor sitting down at the table that has been set up. Yakov—who has been a step behind Victor the entire time—has to help him sit down. There's a strange tension in the air that is palpable even to Yuuri; then Victor leans forward into the mic, smiles charmingly, and says something that makes everyone laugh.

The knot of worry Yuuri has carried since Victor's accident loosens. If Victor is able to make a joke, then his injury might not be so terrible.

"He looks so tired," Yuuko says quietly as the video progresses. Victor had spoken briefly at the beginning, then opened the interview to questions. Though Victor answers each one he receives with his trademark optimism and light-heartedness, Yuuri quietly agrees with Yuuko.

"Well, he probably had surgery since they transferred him to the hospital," interjects Nishigori. "And he missed a major competition that he was predicted to win. I know I wouldn't be able to sleep if that happened to me."

Yuuri watches closely Victor as he responds. The skin around his eyes and mouth are tight and his movements are unusually subdued. Halfway through the questions, he even begins to gently rub the highest point of his soul mark, a pale tendril that creeps over the collar of his sweater and up the left tendon of his throat. It is such an obvious sign of anxiety that Yuuri wonders how Victor can maintain his calm facade.

Thankfully, Yakov eventually intervenes on Victor's behalf. The noise in the room rises in a sudden cacophony, the reporters shouting over one another; Victor begins to talk into the mic, an action that is cut off by Yakov, who puts a staying hand on Victor's shoulder and murmurs something into his ear. Victor nods and—with more assistance from Yakov—stands up. Then he tucks the crutches under his armpits, flashes one last hollow smile at the crowd, and hobbles away.

.

Victor Nikiforov announces ACL tear

Less than forty-eight hours after Russia failed to medal in the 2008-09 Worlds competition, Victor Nikiforov held a small press conference at his home rink in St. Petersburg. Nikiforov, who suffered an injury on March 15, has been silent about his condition since his admission to Medem International.

"You can stop worrying," Nikiforov said to his audience as he sat down. "As you can see, I am still alive."

Nikiforov's charm was present from the start. He apologized for the quickly called press conference and then proceeded to calmly inform the reporters in attendance of his anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) reconstruction.

"We couldn't perform the surgery immediately," said Nikiforov with a smile. "That was the worst part, I think. The waiting. I was okay with the tests and the scans because it meant we were doing something, but once the decision was made to actually have surgery, I had to wait awhile for the swelling to go down. I ended up watching a lot of public television."

One of the most common injuries among athletes, ACL tears vary in severity. Some merely require physical therapy and a knee brace while others—like Nikiforov's—require invasive surgery. Nikiforov received an autograft from his hamstring tendon; this procedure is preferred by many since the borrowed tissue is unlikely to be rejected.

"The bruise makes it look a lot worse than it feels," joked Nikiforov.

The minimal recovery time for ACL reconstruction is six months, which would put Nikiforov's return at the beginning of October. Since the 2009-10 season begins on July 1, many were curious about Nikiforov's plans. Nikiforov said that he has no plans to retire; he stated that he will focus on his recovery and return to the ice as quickly as possible.

"Do you think this injury will impact your future performances?" asked Alexei Mikheyev, a sports journalist for Kommersant magazine.

"No," Nikiforov replied without hesitation. "I am confident that I will make a full recovery."

This may be true since reconstructed ACLs have high success rates. The key here is patience; if proper rehabilitation procedures are not followed, the ligament will become less mobile and cause the bones to rub together. Another problem Nikiforov may face is fear. Traumatic impacts can cause the ACL to re-tear and—as we all have seen—one bad fall is all it takes. Take previous 1998 Olympic bronze medalist, Mathis Durand, for example…

.

part x

.

[ohmypreciousgirl]

Yuri On Ice Recs - Victor/Yuuri Edition

Because @hakkaiduo just finished YOI and I promised her a few recs ♥ This is the ~first post aka Victuuri fics. Next one will be Otayuri o/ Also, I think @playingfetchwithdinosaurs should check this o/

a glide in your step by Yuu_chi [10,087 - T]

Ah, Yuuri thinks as his skates touch down on the ice, and even as Yuuko watches him it’s the weight of Viktor’s eyes he feels on his shoulder blades, I’m not ready to let this go.

around you the world is greener by kevystel {Part 1 of have you heard there's a rumour in st. petersburg} [2,867 - G]

Viktor has given him everything. Yuuri searches for a way to give back.

Comment: Please read everything by kevystel, especially with someone so true series.

From The Moon by ButterBeerBitch [4,883 - M]

Victor Nikiforov, the living legend, winner of five consecutive World Championships and five straight Grand Prix Finals - was in Yuuri's bed. Yuuri's bumpy, squeaky bed, with the Pokémon stickers peeling off the frame and the unwashed sheets. "Smells like you," Victor mumbled, careful and coy.

Yuuri was on the verge of passing out.

some things require leaving by idrilka {Part 1 of studies on intimacy} [3,051 - T]

It still amazes Victor, how much one person can feel like home.

(Or: On leaving and returning.)

Fascination by smudgesofink {Part 1 of Of Love and Other Emotions} [1,198 - T]

Victor didn’t understand it at first but Yuuri has such a deep fascination with every part of his body.

Comment: Read everything by smudgesofink.

Victor Effing Nikiforov by shysweetthing [13,259 - E]

AU in which Yuuri still doesn’t remember the banquet, somehow doesn’t blow Japanese Nationals, runs into Victor at the World Championships, and has absolutely no idea why his idol is suddenly friendly and incredibly handsy.

Heartbeat by emilyenrose [3,148 - G]

Victor starts sleeping in Yuri's bed well before the Cup of China.

Comment: Read everything by emilyenrose, especially Unimaginable.

Just for You, a Symphony from My Soul by Caeseria [12,968 - E]

Sometimes, it’s the smaller moments – those out of the public eye – that are the most important.

o, death, where is your sting? by infiniteandsmall [8,680 - T]

The last day that Viktor will spend coaching Yuuri in the dim quiet of Hatsetsu Ice Castle, Viktor kneels in front of his future husband to lace his skates. His knees ache, but they have since he was twenty-five, and with Yuuri’s smile sweet as Belgian chocolate he barely notices the pain in his joints.

never stop until the grave by Naraht [12,714 - M]

Back in St Petersburg, Victor attempts to combine coaching Yuuri with preparing for his own return to competition. The spirit is willing but the flesh may be weak.

Shut up and let me hold you by shysweetthing [2,460 - M]

“How can you tell me to return to the ice while saying you’re retiring?” As Victor spoke, his anger flared into something just a little darker. Something just a little possessive, and Yuuri was usually the possessive one between them. Victor found himself closing the distance between them, grabbing hold of Yuuri’s leg. Yuuri shrank back—a centimeter—but Victor followed. Their noses brushed. Their lips were so close that when Victor spoke, it was almost a kiss.

“Yuuri, how am I supposed to skate my heart out when you are my heart?”

slow it down by SportsAnimeRuinedMyLife (KnightOfRage) [2,894 - T]

"At first, he looked at Yuuri and he just wanted.

But then he started looking at Yuuri and wanting to protect him, to make him happy.

Now he looks at Yuuri and he wants everything with him.

It’s terrifying."

Or...people have always been easy for Victor. Yuuri is the exception to the rule.

falling through the ice by lagaudiere [2,235 - G]

Home. Home is Viktor's sparse St. Petersburg apartment, which is now where Yuri keeps his clothes and his toothbrush and his silver medal, which Viktor hung above the fireplace, and his extensive collection of Viktor Nikiforov posters, because Minako had mailed every one of them from Hatsetsu. (Yuri had shoved them into a drawer, but Viktor put some of his favorites on the fridge, next to the photos he'd had printed of Yuri in his juniors costumes.)

in the spaces between by sixpences [7,237 - T]

Yuuri's life in St Petersburg is spread between four languages.

mended with gold by lagaudiere [10,393 - M]

Yuri's first kiss was when he was sixteen, and in any accounting of kisses except chronological order, it wouldn't even rank. It hardly counted.

Viktor’s first kiss was when he was sixteen, and it changed his life.

i feel like i win when i lose by renaissance [7,966 - E]

Yuuri’s life is a mess. He came a spectacular last in the Grand Prix Finals, drank too much at the banquet, initiated no fewer than three dance-offs, took his shirt off, wore his tie like a headband, pole-danced in his underpants, made a fool of himself in front of ISU officials—and now, somehow, he’s Viktor Nikiforov’s booty call.

born to make history by norgbelulah {Part 1 of Born To Royal AU} [11,122 - T]

Victor Nikiforov, Heir Tsesarevich and Grand Duke of Russia, needs a husband and only a Japanese Prince will do.

body music by fan_nerd {Part 1 of body music (reverse au)} [3,616 - T]

Across the ocean, Yuuri Katsuki is about to make his senior debut at the Grand Prix, and there is not a soul alive who believes the young man is coming for less than gold and a new world record. He’d already broken the record at the Juniors last year, so now he has a reputation to maintain.

Victor is just enamored by his body, which is fluid and masterful. He wishes he had even an ounce of Katsuki’s bountiful grace. “I want to dance,” Victor murmurs, playing with the ends of his long, long hair. “I want to make music with my body, Yakov.”