The Origins (Chapter 4)
Summary: Before the Renegades put an end to the Age of Anarchy, they were six kids trying to survive day by day in a city ruled by chaos and desolation. Is there a space for hope and kindness somewhere in Gatlon City? Maybe.
AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25123756/chapters/62248708
Translating it’s so exhausting. Especially when you have that bitch (Grammarly) constantly telling you “oh ur wrong” and you ask “where?” and the bitch responds “oh im not gonna tell you u r not premium”. So fuck it. Here it is. This was supposed to be Evander’s chapter, but I decided give this one to Tamaya instead, just for the fun. He can wait, he’s fine.
As you can see, I started to title my chapters. I already did it on AO3, but not on tumblr. The other three posts have their titles too. If you guess what song are the titles from, you get a cookie (?
I want to start doing a tag list but I don’t know who to tag. So if you want in, just tell me. I’m too shy to tag you if you don’t tell me to do it because I feel like I’m bothering you.
Also, trigger warning for domestic violence. I tried to keep it as low as possible and it’s a small scene, but I understand if there are people who still can’t handle it, and I’m no one to judge. I will take TW more seriously from now on. If you think I should tag any other of my work, feel free to DM me or send me an ask, even if it’s anonymus. Seriously, feel free to correct me. I’m a big girl, I can handle it;)
Running away from the world that we designed
Age of Anarchy
Year 8
Tamaya had gone three weeks without human contact. Her parents did not talk to her and she did not talk to her parents. Her mother sent the only remaining servant to bring her food twice a day. Every time he entered the room, Tamaya turned around to avoid making eye contact, because if she did, she would start crying. No one else was going to see her cry ever again.
It all started when Tamaya was flying in her room when her father came in without knocking first. The man was paralyzed and gaped, at the same time that Tamaya lost her concentration and plummeted onto her bed.
Then, her father started yelling at her. Marcus Rae had never been known to be particularly friendly in the way he spoke to other people. She had never heard that man say "thank you" or "please." However, Tamaya had not seen him scream either. At least, not at her. And that was enough to make her cry.
Not only because she was scared, but also because she felt dumb. She had managed to hide her abilities for five years and she had been caught in such a stupid way. Tamaya believed she was smarter, but she was not.
Her father took her by the arm and lifted her from the bed with such abruptness that Tamaya accidentally knocked over a porcelain figure that was resting on her nightstand. His shouting was already so unbearable that she could only make out a few words.
Freak. Bounder. Idiot.
Her mother ran into the room and asked what was going on.
“Your daughter can fly!" yelled Marcus. "How the fuck did she learn to do it!?”
And so it went on. Her father kept shaking her like she was a rag doll, while the woman begged her husband to calm down, with a trembling voice full of terror.
But he wouldn't stop. Nothing made him stop.
Freak. Bounder. Idiot.
“Please control yourself!” her mother cried.
In response, her father slapped her on the floor.
"ANSWER MY QUESTION, MELISSA!”
Freak. Bounder. Idiot.
Melissa lay there, sobbing and holding her cheek. Seeing that his wife was not going to answer him in any way, his father refocused his attention on her. He turned her around and held her tightly by the arms. Then he forced her to walk to the wall and stamped her face against it. With one hand she crushed the back of Tamaya's neck and with the other, he scratched his chin.
Freak. Bounder. Idiot.
Before she could react, her father tugged on one of her wings, as if he was going to pluck it apart. Tamaya screamed and broke down in tears again.
Freak. Bounder. Idiot.
Did he hate her that much? Was Tamaya that disgusting to him?
Freak. Bounder. Idiot.
How could someone do that to their daughter? How ruthless do you have to be?
Was she a monster? Was his father a monster?
Were the two of them monsters?
An electric current ran through her body. Adrenaline seized her veins, giving her the strength to push her father away from her and scream:
“Enough!”
With a wave of her hand, Tamaya fired a bolt of lightning at one of her bookshelves, setting it fire. Her mother reacted and ran to the kitchen for a bucket of water to put the fire out. Her father was not even able to move, nor did Tamaya. She was not concerned about the accident she had caused. Her gaze was fixed on Marcus, and her contempt for him was stronger than any pain and fear she had left.
She wiped one last tear that ran down her cheek.
She may be a freak and she may be a bounder. But she made a promise to herself that she would never be an idiot again.
Melissa quickly put out the fire. They were very lucky that it did not spread to the rest of the room. After the initial impact, her parents stared at her as if they didn't know her. Their eyes seemed to say: “How is it that such a dangerous and violent creature our daughter?”
It is because you are creatures as dangerous and violent as me.
Now it was Saturday night. Tamaya was sitting on the carpet, surrounded by her dolls. When Georgia asked why she didn't get rid of them, she always blamed her mother, saying she would be very upset if Tamaya threw away such expensive toys.
However, Tamaya did not throw them away because, unlike Georgia, she did keep playing with her dolls. She had conversations with them, brushed their hair, and if her mother managed to get yarn, she would embroider their skirts with details of flowers or birds. In winter, she had even gone as far as to make sweaters for them.
It was a childish hobby for a seventeen-year-old girl, but it was also the only thing that kept her sane.
Knock. Knock.
Tamaya looked up at the light catcher. She flew to see who it was.
Georgia.
“What are you doing here?” she asked through clenched teeth.
“Surprise!”
“Lower your voice,” she scolded her. “My parents could hear you.”
Georgia put a fake padlock over her mouth and made a pleading gesture as she pointed to the latch on the catch. Tamaya rolled her eyes and let her in.
“My mom doesn't know I'm here, but she told me everything,” Georgia explained sitting on the bed. “Which wing was it?”
“This one,” she replied pointing to her right wing, “but it's nothing. It practically healed itself.”
Georgia looked at the circle of dolls on the carpet, stifling a giggle.
“What party are you having?” she asked teasingly.
Tamaya was silent. Georgia realized that her friend was in no mood for jokes and looked down, with a serious expression on her face.
“My mom also told me about your other power,” Georgia whispered.
The blood went to her feet.
“What power?”
“The lighting thing.”
Then, silence. That reunion was nothing like Tamaya expected. She believed Georgia was going to have hundreds of questions and was not going to stop talking. Georgia always had a lot of things to say to her. Most of the time, she did not talk about important issues. It was always about discussions with her mother, gossips going around her school, or about a new book that she had found and that she recommended.
Tamaya was glad Georgia knew how to start conversations. She had no idea.
How her mother had been able to talk about Tamaya's powers with Mrs. Rawle was a mystery to her. Melissa Rae was very concerned with what other people would think of her, something that had never made sense to Tamaya. Was there someone left in that damn city who kept worrying about something as stupid as status?
“Is it true that you almost hit your dad with one? With lighting?”
Tamaya did not want to lie to Georgia. Lying was not her thing. However, she wasn't quite sure about what to tell her exactly. Should it be something like “Yes, I did it, so what?” or something less violent? Something between the lines of: “Yes ... and I regret it.”
The thing was, Tamaya had no regrets. She had a lot of time to think about it those past few days and she could never force herself to feel a single shred of regret for her actions. Not even when her mom begged her to apologize to her dad. She just couldn't.
However, it was not until that moment that she realized she wasn't proud of it either. If it had been for her, Georgia would never have known about that little detail of the fight and her powers.
Tamaya already knew that she could control lightning and storms. She had discovered it relatively recently when she was flying and accidentally shot lightning at the ground. It was small and just left a black stain on the fine wood flooring, nothing a rug couldn't hide.
But lighting should not be near people, and Tamaya knew it.
“Why didn't you tell me?”
Tamaya turned to see her. “Pardon me?”
Georgia was frowning and arms crossed. There was reproach in each of the words that came out of her mouth.
“Why didn't you tell me you had more powers?” she asked. “Why didn't you trust me? I thought we were friends.”
“Woah, wait, Georgia,” she interrupted her. “How exactly is this about you?”
“Friends are supposed to talk to each other,” Georgia said. “I always tell you everything that happens to me and you know every last detail about my life. Why don't you tell me what's wrong with you? How many other things do you hide from me? Is our friendship based on lies? Is your name even Tamaya?”
Tamaya was so shocked by Georgia's reaction, she thought she was hallucinating. She noticed each gesture her friend's face made and each movement of her eyes. And she wasn't kidding. Tamaya was not hallucinating. Georgia was seriously mad at her.
“Really?” she asked her. “After everything that's happened to me, somehow I'm the bad guy to you?”
“Yes.”
The audacity of this bitch.
“How the hell can you be so self-centered, Georgia?” she asked with flushed cheeks. “Do you think this is because I didn't trust you? Did you ever stop to think about how I felt? Doesn't it occur to you that the reason I hid it from you is that I wanted to protect you?”
“Protect me?” Georgia laughed. “Don't be ridiculous, what would you be protecting me from?”
“From myself!”
And Georgia laughed again.
“I was protecting you from myself!” Tamaya insisted. “Stop laughing!”
But she ignored her. Georgia kept on laughing as if it was the funniest joke she had ever heard. It was clear as day that Georgia didn’t care anymore if the whole neighborhood heard her. She didn’t care if they got into trouble.
And she does not care about you, Tamaya.
Tears welled up in her eyes.
No, no one else was going to see her cry ever again. Not even Georgia.
Without thinking, Tamaya lunged for her friend. She grabbed the collar of her blouse, lifted her ten feet above the ground, and stamped her against the wall. She could feel the electricity on her fingertips, and she was sure Georgia felt it too.
She was no longer laughing.
“Look me in the eyes, Georgia,” she whispered. “Look me in the eyes!”
“I'm doing it,” she replied quietly.
“What do you see?”
“That you have beautiful eyes.”
Tamaya held her tighter. “Aren't you afraid of me? Aren't you afraid of monsters?”
Tears began to flow from Georgia's dark eyes. She put a hand to her mouth and a faint smile of pity appeared on her lips.
“Oh, Tamaya. You are not a monster.”
She had no qualms with people seeing her cry. How pathetic.
She released her.
“Yes I am,” she hissed.
Georgia fell to her feet.
“No, people have convinced you that you are,” she exclaimed, approaching her. “That's what they always say about all of us.”
She reached out to take her hand. Tamaya rose a few inches to not be within her reach. Georgia did not insist.
“And the worst thing is that,” she continued saying, “there are some people who believe them and become monsters. You know, like a certain person who starts with Ace and ends with Anarchy.”
Oh. Him.
“You know, I think he hates himself. A person who loves themselves would never do the things he does.”
“I don't blame him.”
Georgia pursed her lips. “Why not?”
“If you spend your entire life calling someone a monster, what do you expect them to become?”
Silence appeared again. For a second, Tamaya was pleased with herself for making Georgia run out of arguments.
But Georgia was never run out of arguments.
“That still doesn't excuse it,” Georgia replied. “You are constantly calling yourself a monster inside your head, and you had not become one.”
Tamaya looked at the mirror. Her reflection looked back at her.
“Would you still be my friend if I were a monster?”
“Uh, I don't know,” Georgia shrugged. “But I don't have to worry about it. You will never become a monster.”
“How are you so sure?” she asked defiantly.
“Because you are too strong to become one.”
She wished she could believe her.
No, Tamaya wasn't strong. That room was driving her crazy. She heard no other voice than her own, telling her the most horrible things she could hear every day. The world had never called her a monster because Tamaya's world were those four walls. Those four walls too similar to—
Oh, God.
Too similar to a monster's cage.
“I have to go,” Tamaya blurted out.
“Go?” Georgia asked in dismay. “But where?"
“I don’t know, but I have to go. Right now.”
Georgia asked no questions when she was helping Tamaya find a backpack, or when she packed Molly away before she began to look for clothes. She didn't even ask questions when Tamaya didn't dare go through the skylight, because she thought she heard her parents asking her not to leave.
However, when she turned around, she realized that no one was there.
She came out.
The air in the outside world smelled like gasoline and rain. The higher she flew, the smaller her house looked. Her neighborhood was the only point of light in that dull city. The buildings looked abandoned and lonely even from that distance.
It was horrible. But it was the world. A new world.
Tamaya allowed herself to laugh. She was so happy that she even dared to flip in the air.
Then, she realized that Georgia was not flying next to her. She was standing on the ceiling of her room, looking at her with teary eyes.
A crazy idea came to her mind.
“You come?” she asked her.
Georgia shook her head. She reached into her pants pockets and pulled out a torn locket. Tamaya reached out to look at it better. It had a missing part, was slightly rusty, and was not made of real gold, but the chain and clasp were intact.
“I found it in the market,” she told her, “with a lady who sold fish.”
“Why would a fisherwoman be selling lockets?” Tamaya asked raising an eyebrow.
“I do not know. It was from her husband, according to her,” Georgia explained. “But now it’s yours."
Tamaya had not worn any jewelry for a long time.
“It looks tragic,” she said.
“It combines with the city,” Georgia replied. Tamaya put on the locket. “Would you forgive me?” she asked. “I was selfish and I shouldn't have blamed you for not telling me. You had your reasons for keeping the secret. I understand if you don't want to talk to me—”
“Stop,” Tamaya ordered. “I'll come looking for you in a couple of days,” she assured her. “If you haven't heard from me by then, I'm dead.”
Her friend shuddered. She didn't know if from the cold or the fear.
“Any advice for the outside world?”
Georgia approached her with a smile and held her hand. “When in doubt, fly.”
Tamaya looked towards the horizon. The doubts did not take long to arise.
“Fine.”
Then, Tamaya flew. And she didn't look back.
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