#gotta make more rug totes again

[forgetmesleepy]

Clown in a bed of flowers rug!!!!! Sometimes we just wanna lie down and stare at the clouds going by amongst the smell of the flowers…! Cat for scale

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

The enemy of my enemy is ALSO my enemy, Part 4

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Jason did not know how to feel about standing in the middle of a teen girl’s room.

Of course, he technically could go back ‘home’ to Lazarus Holdings, but he wasn’t particularly eager to. Bucky and Melisande would not be pleased with him when he came back. Which was understandable, considering he had left them to do his paperwork… but, consider: he does not like consequences.

Besides, who knows, maybe they’ll have patched up the way out and he wouldn’t be able to get back. As much as he hated his current predicament, he hated the idea of allowing Hawkmoth to make more paperwork for him even more.

So, stand in the middle of a teen girl’s room he did.

Or not. He looked around awkwardly before taking a seat on the wood floor as best he could when he was literally intangible. He was really just floating in midair. Star Wars’ users of The Force be warned, he’s coming for your meditation shtick.

Marinette sighed and leaned back in her desk chair, rubbing her eyes. Now that she was no longer transformed, he could see the absolute exhaustion that clung to her like a curse. The bags under her eyes were the size of tote bags, and the raccoon look did not suit such a young face.

“He’s gotta be in the rich district,” she mumbled, more to herself than anything. “Being Hawkmoth requires him to spend all day waiting for people to have strong negative emotions. Can’t do that if you have a real job.”

“Gasp. A rich guy is an asshole. How surprising,” deadpanned Jason.

Adrien sent him a glare. “My dad’s rich and he’s fine.”

“Nono. He has a point,” Marinette said. “Fuck that guy.”

Adrien gave her a mildly offended glance. Marinette hardly paid him any mind. Mostly because she had leaned back too far in her chair and was now in a heap on the ground. She seemed less than happy about this development, but apparently wasn’t bothered enough to do anything about it.

It was quiet for a moment.

Jason cut his gaze between Marinette, who was stretching out on her rug, and Adrien, who was spinning in his chair. “Do you guys seriously not do anything while you’re waiting for akumas?”

Adrien cracked a grin that could only be seen for half a second before he was facing the other way again. “We do our schoolwork.”

“And our day jobs,” Marinette added.

He squinted at them. “You have school? And jobs?”

“Legally required to go to school,” said Marinette, who seemed about as annoyed with this fact as every other person that was forced to go to school. “And yeah, we both work for his dad. He’s a model, I won a design contest a while back and now I have the pleasure of working under his label.”

Neither of them seemed thrilled about this fact.

Jason didn’t particularly like the implications of that. It could be that they just hated their jobs, like the majority of people, but he couldn’t imagine that these kids needed to have jobs – Adrien was, apparently, rich, and from the room they were in Jason figured it was safe to bet that Marinette wasn’t struggling either. So, if they disliked it, why not quit?

But… then again… from the way Marinette had instantly dismissed the idea of Adrien’s father being a good person… and the way Adrien had opted to be here despite not having anything to do… well, it wasn’t looking good.

He sighed and brought a hand up to rub the space between his brows, trying to physically get rid of the tension. “So… you don’t do anything for fun?” He asked, deciding to shelve that for a later date because he had another, different concerning thing he wanted to concentrate on.

“Gotta always be ready,” Marinette shrugged unconcernedly.

Adrien ran a hand through his hair, shaking a couple of strands free of their gel prison. “It sucks when you have to stop in the middle of something fun.”

Damn. These kids are messed up.

He leaned back on his hands, his lips pursing in a frown. “Alright, well, you can always go back to it after, can’t you?”

“Too tired at that point,” Adrien sighed.

Jason mulled this over for all of three seconds before shaking his head. “Well, that’s a terrible thing to do to yourself. Just because your lives are hectic doesn’t mean that you have to ruin your little free time.”

“After we’re done we should be fine,” Adrien waved him off.

Jason gave a wry smile. “I’m proof of the fact that a ‘later’ is not guaranteed.”

It was quiet for a few moments as the other two processed this.

And then, surprisingly, it was Marinette that clapped her hands together and pushed herself to her feet. “Alright, what’re we doing?”

Jason really hadn’t thought that he’d get this far.

But… well, a quick glance around the room gave him an idea.

~

Marinette sent him a dirty look. “Y’know, it’s convenient for you to choose a pillow fort when you can’t even touch things.”

Jason spread his hands in a ‘what can you do’ gesture.

A pillow sailed through his head.

~

Eventually, they managed to make a fort out of blankets and pillows (and also a couple of chairs and the bed and a broom for structure), and the three crawled inside.

Marinette smiled and flicked on a set of fairy lights, casting their little safe haven in a pale pink glow.

“That’s definitely a fire hazard,” Adrien said, eyeing them with a hint of nervousness, but then he seemed to brush off the idea like it was nothing. “Alright. Now what?”

“Now,” a high-pitched, unfamiliar voice chimed, and Jason was lucky that he wasn’t corporeal because if he was he would have sent their fort toppling over in his haste to get away from the thing that had surprised him. And he meant thing. His head whipped over to where two tiny beings were floating in the entrance to the fort. Between them, they carried a large platter of… “You can’t do a pillow fort without sweets!”

Neither of the miraculous holders looked perturbed by the sudden appearance of the two beings. In fact, Marinette cracked a half smile.

“Did you guys steal those cookies from downstairs?”

“They were a bad batch!” The black one defended himself, puffing his cheeks out in a strange kind of pout.

Marinette grinned. “I hope you know that you’re not making me want to eat those more, Plagg.”

“Good. More for us, then!” ‘Plagg’ said.

This earned a tiny eyeroll from the other two.

Jason fought the urge to rub a hand over his eyes. That was showing just a little too much emotion for him. He did, however, gesture to them with his hands in a kind of ‘what the fuck?!’ way.

Marinette snorted. “What, did you think we just randomly ended up with powers?”

“... I want you to look at me for a couple seconds,” Jason said. “And wonder why I might think that.”

There was a beat.

Marinette had the decency to blush a little, tugging her hair in front of her face in an attempt to hide her shame.

Jason sighed and looked back at the pair of floating beings – who weren’t floating anymore, in the few moments he had taken to speak to Marinette they had set the tray on the pillow and then taken a seat on the rim of the plate – which seemed to be scrutinizing him over their baked goods.

After a couple of seconds the tiny red one smiled at him and offered a cookie.

He gave a polite little smile in return and shook his head. “Can’t eat.” He stuck his arm through the nearby blanket to prove his point.

And then, to his surprise, the black one huffed and nodded. “Oh, I remember that. Torture that was.”

His eyebrows knit together.

“What? Did you think that us all-powerful beings just wanted to put ourselves at the mercy of any human that got our miraculous? I mean, all the stuff with Hawkmoth just shows how terrible of an idea it is.”

Jason blinked dumbly. His eyes flicked to the ‘magical earrings and ring’ that Marinette and Adrien sported, and then back down at the two kwamis who were eating oh-so-cheerfully.

“So… you basically gave up what could have been all of your free will in return for being tangible.”

The pair of beings nodded in unison, not even an ounce of hesitation nor regret hiding within their expressions.

He considered this. He had only been intangible for a few hours, and already he could tell that he would likely go insane if things stayed this way. After years of sitting around doing mind-numbing paperwork, wasn’t it understandable that all he wanted was to feel the grass beneath his feet again? To be able to eat a pastry? To want to curl up under a blanket? To touch another human being?

He bit his lip. “Do you think…?” He began awkwardly, unsure of how to broach the subject.

Luckily or unluckily, recognition sparkled in the pair of beings’ eyes. They looked at each other.

The red one looked back at him. “I don’t know...”

“Tikki,” Plagg hissed.

‘Tikki’ made a face. “He’s not a god like us, it might not even work.”

“We should try at least! He’s a kid, for fucks sake!”

“Exactly. He’s a kid. He shouldn’t be making decisions like this when he doesn’t even have a fully developed frontal lobe!”

“Well, that’s never going to happen!” Plagg pointed out. “So, if he wants it, he wants it!”

“We are not letting a kid give up his free will.”

“He’s a human, still, or at least partially, right? Something about being kinda dead or whatever? Maybe he can wield it himself!”

“Maybe he can’t!”

Plagg scoffed. “Then we can give him to one of the kids.”

“That’s –!”

Marinette raised a hand hesitantly. “Would he still be able to find Hawkmoth for us if he does this?”

Jason’s mouth dropped open in offense. He hadn’t expected one of the other humans to be against it, especially not for a reason like that, but perhaps it made sense that they might not be on his side. After all, how could they ever understand what it was like to watch everyone else around you enjoy the simple pleasures of life while knowing you could never do the same?

She gritted her teeth. “I’m not saying never, I’m saying that – if it might limit you – maybe it should come after you help us.”

I don’t trust you to not bail immediately, and we still need you, he translated. He suddenly remembered that he very much despised pretty much everyone in this room. Why do they always have to make his death so damn awful? Wasn’t death supposed to be peaceful? Because, if so, he’d been cheated.

And, yes, he understood her reasoning. He was a bat, of course he could understand caution. He would probably do the same in her case. But… it hurt a little being on the other side of it.

At least he had someone on his side, because Plagg was quick to shake his head and come to Jason’s defense:

“Tikki and I still have our powers. He should be fine.”

“Oh,” Marinette said, looking away thoughtfully. She didn’t seem to know what to say now.

Adrien shrugged his shoulders. “I think that, if it’s what he wants to do, we should let him.”

It was silent as the two women considered it. For a moment, Tikki and Marinette seemed to have a conversation with just a couple of vague facial expressions and hand gestures.

And then they both sighed.

Marinette even groaned a little.

Plagg grinned victoriously and turned to him. “What kind of jewelry piece did you want it to be?”

Jason thought it over for a few moments. He didn’t want it to be easy to steal…

“A tongue piercing,” he decided. Not only would it be difficult for someone to wrench his mouth open to even get to it, they would then have to find a way to tear it out as well.

Also, he liked the aesthetic. Sue him.

Tikki nodded once and a flash of black flickered through the air in front of his face. He tried to catch it on instinct, but it sailed through him, and he grimaced a little at the feeling of metal literally slipping through his hand.

Adrien managed to catch it and grinned victoriously as he held up a small, black stud.

Marinette’s mouth dropped open.

“Why does the stuff you make not have the weird ladybug design on it?” She asked, distracted from her mild annoyance by this clear injustice.

“Because you would use your abilities for evil if I let you,” Tikki sighed. “The only thing stopping you is the fact that you care about your aesthetics too much.”

Marinette crossed her arms over her chest in a huff and looked away, glaring at a nearby plush cat as if it had personally offended her.

Jason noted, idly, that she didn’t actually argue to the contrary. At least she’s aware of it.

Plagg jabbed its little paw at Marinette, giving Adrien an almost accusatory look. “Look! Why can’t you be evil like her?!”

Adrien rolled his eyes.

Jason cracked a grin, snickering behind his hand. He could already tell that the group of four seemed to balance each other perfectly. The two girls were more hesitant and calculated, while the boys were more impulsive. The older pair had a kind of wisdom that could only come with existing for centuries, while the two humans brought in new perspectives by virtue of being mortal. Plagg and Marinette were more distinctly chaotic, Tikki and Adrien worked to keep them in line in their own ways. And they all had the kind of familiarity with each other that only came after spending a lot of time together.

He couldn’t help but wonder if there was somewhere he could fit into that.

He grimaced to himself. That was the kind of mindset that had gotten him killed. He didn’t need to fit in somewhere – he wasn’t supposed to, he was just a kid no one wanted. If nothing else, he should at least try and learn the lesson he had literally died to learn.

Jason cleared his throat awkwardly. “So, how do we do this thing?”

Tikki smiled, but it was one tinged with nerves. She pointed at the stud in Adrien’s hand. “You’ll need to transfer a piece of yourself into the jewelry.”

“... how the fuck –?”

There was a knocking sound and the group of five jumped. Everyone except for Jason looked to the trapdoor instantly, and he followed their gaze to find it just barely rattling.

Tikki and Plagg darted out of sight.

Jason cursed and looked around, thinking.

And then he looked down at himself. He hadn’t changed his outfit since he had started working, had opted for a simple business suit because he didn’t want to stay in the clothes he had died in (and, besides, a suit just fit for someone that did paperwork as much as he did). But a suit didn’t make sense for someone that looked his age, and even then the suit was made more strange by the fact that it was in tatters from his climb to the overworld.

He took a deep breath before forcing his clothes to shift into pajamas.

Great. One problem solved. Now for his wings.

He leaned back against the wall of the blanket fort, forcing his wings to phase through, and fought back a grimace.

Awesome. This was working. He looked normal now. He was not suffering. This did not feel strange. If you keep telling yourself things they come true.

Both of the humans were looking at him with wide eyes.

But they quickly brought themselves back to neutral expressions as the trapdoor swung open, revealing someone that looked quite like Marinette, if much older. She wore an apron and a kind smile.

Her eyes widened just slightly when she saw Jason. “Who’s this?” she asked.

“Jason,” he said, giving a small, polite incline of his head.

He ignored the pair of humans jerking just slightly at the mention of his actual name. Clearly, they hadn’t expected that. Robin was technically a name, but he didn’t want to use it in case the woman managed to recognize it somehow. Which left him to come up with a different name, and he had never been good at that. At least he could tell them it was a fake name he came up with on the spot. After all, did he really look like a Jason? Surely, that was too generic a name to find on someone who had two wings sprouting from his back.

For a second, he swore the woman’s soul narrowed her eyes at him. That it glanced around, looking for something. But then the expression was gone, leaving her with the exact same cheerfulness that was on her real face.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Jason,” she said lightly. “If you want anything to eat, tell me, m’kay?”

Jason nodded once in understanding. “Nice to meet you, too, Miss. I’ll do that.”

Her smile stretched a little wider. And then she turned her attention away, resting her hands on her hips and giving the two other kids a mildly scolding look. “So it was you that took that batch. Honestly, how you even get your hands on them without me noticing…”

Marinette grinned. “Hey, at least we only take the scuffed batches.”

The woman shook her head with a fond smile and then reached out to pinch Adrien’s cheek. “Fine. As long as he gets some, I don’t mind.”

Adrien smiled nervously. “It’s not a cheat day, ma’am, I can’t –.”

“You’re too thin. Eat just one, okay?” The woman said.

Adrien’s shoulders slumped and he nodded, picking up a cookie with a hint of reluctance and taking a tiny bite.

The woman seemed sated, at least, giving him a gentle pat on the cheek.

She looked back at Jason and, for a moment, her smile stretched a little wider. “I’m assuming you’re the one that suggested the pillow fort?”

He nodded carefully. “I’ll make sure it gets cleaned up –.”

“Nono, keep it as long as you three want. It’s nice to see them doing ‘younger’ stuff,” she said lightly.

Marinette and Adrien both blushed.

Jason was definitely going to tease them later.

But, for now, he smiled a much more real smile and mumbled a quiet “Gotcha.”

Unlike with Adrien, she didn’t try and touch him. She just gave a lighthearted little laugh and started heading down. Thank god. He wasn’t sure how he would have explained away the fact that her hand would move right through him.

It was silent for a minute. If anyone asked, they would just blame it on making sure she didn’t come back.

And then the silence was broken by a phone ringing.

Adrien groaned. “Akuma.”

“Oh come the fuck on,” Jason said.

“Tell me about it,” Marinette sighed.

And then the pair transformed, and Jason brought back his tattered suit, and the three of them all headed out.

~

The akuma was, apparently, an easy one. Mr. Pigeon. The 69th one, according to a very amused Adrien.

And now Jason understood why they had thought he was one of those ‘akuma’ things at first. If all of them looked like that, then he too would assume anything that was not strictly normal would be an akuma.

Besides that, the only thing of any real note was that Hawkmoth didn’t show up. Which really wasn’t of note, seeing as he apparently only did that once in a blue moon. But it was still disappointing.

So, defeated (in that their plan didn’t work, the akuma was dealt with within the hour), they all headed home, exhaustion making their shoulders slump and their steps heavy.

At least, if this went right, Jason could lean back in the comfortable pillows and fall asleep for the first time in years.

He placed his hands over the tiny, unassuming stud on the ground.

“You need to imagine giving yourself up,” Plagg said, hovering by his shoulder. “A lot of magic is about intent.”

If Jason were human, he would have swallowed thickly, but instead he just gave a sharp nod and started concentrating.

“It should come to you…” Tikki said, her tone more careful, as if he were something fragile that could break if this went wrong.

It was very quiet.

He imagined giving up a part of himself. Allowing himself to become tangible at the cost of some of his free will. Limiting himself for freedom.

Nothing happened. He was still floating. The world beneath him still shied away from his touch, his molecules missing everything else despite his best attempts.

He tried not to be too disappointed. They had mentioned it might not work, it was the first thing Tikki had said. He wasn’t like them, he was something other.

He still found himself fighting back tears.

[vashti-lives]

i decided to rate the flannel in this year’s joann pride collection

First up we have the category I like to call, so bland I only know its supposed to be gay because of the label.

Its rainbow stripes, which is cute? Who doesn’t love a rainbow stripe? I’m not that into that sky blue stripe but eh. 7/10.

This heart fabric is aggressively fine. I mean Joann has cuter rainbow heart fabric than this, right now, but whatever. I can imagine a nice grandma making her 16 year old lesbian niece christmas PJ pants out of them as a show of support. 5/10

Next up we have-- the obvious. 

Love is love was a perfectly good slogan for people campaigning for gay marriage but it has outlived its usefulness and AGAIN I am not into that light blue in the rainbow,  like commit to the original pink and turquoise colors or just use the actual rainbow. I honestly can’t imagine what you make out of this. 4/10

Its rainbows. They’re fine. This is what that grandma makes into sleep pants for her granddaughter NEXT Christmas. 6/10

Now we have, the obvious, but worse:

I know common wisdom says that Rainbows Are Gay but these rainbows are not gay. This pattern looks like it should be on a rug in a low rent daycare where the bright colors and busy pattern distract from the fact that its been puked on 8 times in the last 6 months. 3/10

This next section is what I like to call: If Rainbows Are Gay, Are Colors Gay?

Yes. Yes they are. I personally don’t like this because I think the colors are muddy but I gotta admit: this is pretty gay. 9/10

My gut reaction is that tie-dye is not gay but upon reflection fake tie dye flannel fabric IS actually probably very gay. Its ugly, but I’m sure there are tick tock teens who would be into it. 7/10

And now we have... but who is this for???

This ALSO looks like it belongs in a daycare, but a much bougie-er one that really leans into neutral colors and wooden toys. 7/10

Points GIVEN because its very inclusive and that’s cool but points deducted because they got the colors of some of the flags wrong. Points further deducted because frankly this is a boring and lazy design. 6/10

I mean, its very cute and I like how inclusive it is but... WHAT IS IT FOR? What are you supposed to make out of this? I could see the print being good in other contexts, on canvas it might make a cute tote? But this is brushed cotton flannel? I... don’t understand. 5/10

OK WHO WANTS THIS? Like... if they had a whole series of pronoun fabrics that would be adorable! My pronouns are they/them or she/her or he/him is totally cute. You could make an adorable “congrats on your transition gift” out of it! This is just... lists of pronouns but with rainbows. 4/10

CONCLUSION!

So ok this is their example of what you could do with this fabric and I think it really hits why I don’t like this collection. Because like. This doesn’t look gay. This looks like it should be hanging in a community center during an anti-bullying week. Like... I cannot imagine a queer person making this and putting it in their home because its just so deeply impersonal. Which really is the heart of the problem.

This collection is *about* the gay community but its not *for* the gay community. Every pattern attempts to encompass the entire community but like, if I’m making a quilt for myself or a friend I want it to be *about* that person.

I mean ok... giant corporation doesn’t get Pride Month, more at 11. I know I know. But like... last year they quietly released two rainbow plaid prints and they were the best rainbow plaid prints I’ve ever seen??? Why not just do it again this year but with more purpose! Release plaids for every flag! Or stripes or... something. Joann is pretty good at prints that come in multiple colorways? I just... generally people don’t want merch with *all* the pride flags they want merch with *their* pride flag. They released 11 pride prints this year? It was so many this post is formatted weirdly because it was over the picture post limit! WHY ARE THEY ALL GARBAGE??? They didn’t even reprint any of last year’s good rainbow plaid!!! That shit sold out in like, a month. I *know* they know it was popular. I deeply suspect if they rereleased it people would snap it up again. I would literally buy at least 10 more yards. But no, we get rainbow elementary school grammar exercises.

[atamascolily]

lily watches fma:b, eps. 62-64

Okay, when we last left off, the Big Bad was running around half-naked in a bathroom smiting people in a knockoff young!Hohenheim body, and 50 million people in Amestris had a really shitty day being devoured alive for their life energy before being miraculously restored to their still-breathing bodies by a not-quite-deus ex machina.

hohenheim challenges father to create something and he spits out humans from Xerxes--including the asshole king whose greed destroyed his entire country and people who RECOGNIZE HOHENHEIM.

[like, the trauma here!!!]

[I also like JUST NOW REALIZED that Greedling is the same character archetype as Grimmjow from Bleach - an aggressive, hyper-macho asshole who is a surprisingly fun character to watch break things?]

[FURTHERMORE both 03!Greed and Grimmjow had the same Japanese voice actor, LOLOLLOL]

greed and olivier have a pissing contest, lol

al's body is destroyed protecting may - good thing he's got another one waiting in the wings!

and then it's everyone takes a turn at father - first the briggs soldiers, then roy with hawkeye guiding him, armstrong, lan fan,the chimeras, etc,etc,

roy is so weirded out by being able to cast without a circle, LOL.

father tries to eat greed for more stones

ed swooping in in to defend greed is GREAT

so is watching izumi fight!!

anyway, they finally wear father down to the point where God can fight back and Father vomits him back up again.

... which makes him literally a zombie staggering around for "stones"

ed's automail is shattered, and he's pinned down - al, realizing his armor is cracked and his blood seal is about to break, gets May to make a circle so he can swap out his body for Ed's arm.

it works and ed goes absolutely feral on father.

(the fact that he still looks like hohenheim probably helps ed, tbh)

everyone cheers him on and greed is like "oh, yeah, all I really wanted was FRIENDS,"sob

greed sacrifices himself to keep ling yao from being eaten by father and it's so heartbreaking, everyone loves u greed

greed is like, yeah, kid, lan fan has a stone, take 'em and go home and be emperor of xing like a boss

greed: so epic he gets to die TWICE in this show. AND WE'RE SAD BOTH TIMES BUT THIS ONE IS WORSE.

greed transforms father's body into graphite (using his Ultimate Shield ability) but gets crushed by father.

ed slams a hole in father's chest and all the philosopher's stones leach out of him and then... the black grabby shadow hands emerge from the same hole and pull him back wherever he came from...?

[ngl: I don't get WHY that works, but okay.]

and of course, he gets to monologue about how he just wanted to be free without any constraints, which gets hohenheim all emotional.

Father is back to his flash form in the Gate World and he calls Truth "God" and asks why he didn't like him... and truth's like "because you're a greedy little asshole, that's why"

father is sucked back into the open gate by more grabby shadow hands and says "no, I don't want to go back" implying that this is, in fact, where he came from because the Xerxes alchemists were fucking around with stuff they shouldn't have been.

father is screaming and truth's like, "why? this is TOTES what you wanted, isn't it?being one with god?"

meanwhile, hohenheim offers his own life in exchange for al on the grounds that he was  a crappy dad.

true, sir, but also ed is having none of it

anyway, ed offers his own gate and ability to do alchemy as trade for al's body and truth's like "Sure, yeah,why not"

turns out that even once they've won, hohenheim is still brooding and depressed over father - he blames himself because it came from his blood? Like, dude, there are a lot of things to blame yourself for and you pick the one that REALLY ISN'T YOUR FAULT?

armstrong thanks him for ed and al saving the day and hohenheim bursts into tears and walks off... and goes to resembool to die on tricia's grave?

like, did he even say good-bye to his kids? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, HOHENHEIM?

pinako finds him dead at the grave, and tbh, i'm disappointed she doesn't punch him out anyway like she promised

"goodbye, my weird immortal friend"

Anyway, umm... that's basically the end, but let's wrap up with the "where are they now?" final episode!

somehow ling is emperor because he has magic people juice to give the current emperor, which just... seems like it might lead to problems, given what happened in xerxes? Just sayin’. But he’s going to take care of May and her clan, so I guess the show’s just going to sweep that under a rug and pretend it’s fine!

[ling definitely got the best character development of anybody along with Greed]

marcoh shows up with a philosopher's stone, which Roy agrees to use to rebuild his eyesight and also Havoc's legs, which just feels a little too deus ex machina for me, and also kinda shaky ethics here. but roy's okay with it because he's going to rebuild ishval, so...

and apparently scar is gonna be there, too? still forever grumpy, though.

grumman is fuhrer now (??!!) because roy and company are rebuilding ishval, so I guess all that talk about war crime trials was just for show because that sure isn't happening now that they won.

[I'm still bitter because it should have been Olivier!!]

Mrs. Bradley is raising Pride/Selim, who seems perfectly normal, even though Grumman says they'll have to kill him if he does anything evil. Mrs. Bradley says, "I'll make sure he doesn't show anything," which is kinda ominous to me? Like this woman would do anything for her kid. If Pride DOES get out of hand, she's not going to tell anyone.

[also I'm bitter that Pride gets to live and Greed DOESN'T, sob]

Ed and Al hang out in Resembool with Winry for two years until they get restless and go off on adventures again--but separately. Al goes to Xing with Jerso and Zampano (who have suddenly decided they want their original bodies back after being fine with it for the entirety of the series).

That's fine, since Al and May are very definitely a thing, but Ed goes west--which we've never heard from in the entire series--by himself, to research alchemy after sacrificing his ability to DO alchemy. I CALL BULLSHIT.

Winry goes with him to the train station and Ed is so fucking tsundere, I cringed just watching him.

(but also it was refreshing to see a male example of this trope and it was super-cute when he started blushing)

BUT ALSO his proposal is based on "equivalent exchange" - "I'll trade half of my life for half of yours!" - which is simultaneously the nerdiest thing ever and also YOU'RE NOT AN ALCHEMIST ANYMORE, ED, STOP.

Winry says that's stupid, she'll give him all of it,and then starts negotiating to 85%.

but given that Ed is LITERALLY RIDING OFF here, I gotta wonder how the math works out.

A random woman asks why Ed's leaving if he's in love with Winry, and Winry says something about how men left at home cause trouble (which implies she's fine with a long-distance relationship). THIS FROM THE GIRL WHO GOT MAD ABOUT BEING LEFT BEHIND ON *SEVERAL* OCCASIONS IN THE SERIES.okay.

In the credits, we see Ed and Winry have two kids, so... Ed has LITERALLY BECOME HIS FATHER, wandering the earth while his wife raises two kids alone. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

I just have... questions.

Like... no. Just no. Ed stayed home and he was a great father to his kids, full stop. He did NOT repeat the cycle; he was a much better person than Hohenheim and he proved it by actually BEING THERE FOR HIS FAMILY WHEN THEY NEEDED HIM.

people say fma03 has a downer ending, but this one bums me out WAY more because it feels so ooc and contradicts a lot of stuff that the show has spent so much time building up to.

i am just left feeling very “meh” and also “what was the point of it all?” which is probably not a great place to be after finishing a story.

[chewie-redbird]

Family Business (Preview)

Author : chewie-redbird

Word Count : 1,748

Warnings : none......corporate backstabbing? maybe.....idk

Summary : (Y/N) West returns to her home city of Vancouver, where she will attend her family’s company, W&Y International, Board meeting. There she is taking over as CEO from her Grandma Darlene McMurray. She was forced into exile as her life wasn’t safe and due to Board pressuring Darlene to do so as (Y/N) was deemed a “corporate issue”. Returning to pull the rug out from the Board, Darlene hands the company to Ken West, who hands it to his sister Angel, who is (Y/N)’s mom. Now as the new CEO, (Y/N), she has to find out why the Board threatened her live? Why they didn’t want her in the company? Who else is involved with this conspiracy to take over her family’s company?

Characters : OC Characters names are based off my real family.

A/N : Uh this was a dream inspired from a variety if shows. I know this probably sucks as it was quickly just typed out and well yeah. Just wanna know if y’all be interested? I’m also currently writing another story too so......yeah......

Sun high in the sky, nice and clear with the rays shining in the beautiful boardroom with floor length windows making the phantom white marble floor sparkle. The big black and gold marble table is surrounded by nineteen black office chairs with one bright red chair at the head of the table. People in amazing suits and dresses sit at the table, discussing between each other about things and people. Then all of a sudden en elder woman in a blue pantsuit strolls in with a man and a woman behind her.

“I see everyone who is here has made it. Good, let’s begin” the elder woman states as she sits in the red chair as the two people stand by her sides,

“So we are here today so I can announce…..” the boss lady was saying when a twenty-two year-old comes rushing in late,

“Sorry, jetlagged, slept past my alarm” the young man sits down besides another young guy towards furthest from the red chair,

“As I was saying, I called all of you here today so I can announce who will be my successor and become head of this empire that my mother built and I kept and expand while others fell”

“Uh we are one person short, we’re missing…..” the young man speaks up but gets a Miranda Priestly glare from the lady at the head of the table,

“Jared shut up, you weren’t here but Grandma Dar and he-who-shall-not-be-named had a falling out and he is in South America in exile now” the young man next to Jared West whispers to him,

“Never even dare think to say his name in my presence ever again” the lady declares as her face twists in hatred at the mere thought of that person,

“Moving on” the lady in the red chair who’s name is Darlene McMurry states while down at the entrance, a pair of black and red 'Prive' Open Toe Louboutin Pumps walk through the front doors and head to the elevators,

“I have decided to step down as Head of this company and name Ken West as my successor” Darlene announces to the group of people as the woman walks past the front desk ignoring a receptionist and gets into a elevator.

The receptionist finally sees the woman as the doors close, she runs back to the desk and calls up to the twenty-fifth floor.

“Hey Klare, how’s it going down on the front desk?” a woman’s voice comes through,

“Jamie, you gotta listen very clearly. She’s back! The bitch has returned home!” Klare the receptionist says with worry as Jamie’s face falls as she sits up straighter,

“What? When? Where? Why?” Jamie starts to shoot off questions at her friend,

“Jamie! She just went up the elevator! She’s going to your floor!” Klare says as Jamie whips her head as the elevator dings singling it’s arrival.

“Jamie? Jamie you there?” Kalre asks as Jamie freezes as the black Louboutin pumps walk out revealing a young woman in a black Long Sleeve Off the Shoulder Asymmetrical Dress by Victoria Beckham, Ruthenium 61mm Aviator Sunglasses by Marc Jacobs and holding a Cabata Calfskin Leather Tote by Christian Louboutin. Her ears were adorned by Châtelaine Pavé Diamond Bezel 18K Gold Statement Drop Earrings, her necklace is a ruby ‘Châtelaine' Pendant Necklace with Diamonds, her right hand ring finger ring is a ruby ‘Wheaton' Petite Ring with Semiprecious Stone & Diamonds and her bracelet on her left wrist is a ruby ‘Albion' Bracelet with Diamonds and 18K Gold which were all made by David Yurman.

“Hello Jamie, they in the boardroom?” the woman in Louboutins asked while turning to walk away,

“Do you think she knows?” Klare asks through the phone as the woman stops, turns to look back at Jamie and lowers the aviators,

“Oh and I know what you did to me” the woman says as she sends the receptionist a spine-chilling smile then walks away.

“So as we sign these forms, I officially hand over the company over to you” Darlene states as she sings her signature as well as the older gentleman named Ken sings his signature officially taking over the company.

Everyone is cheering as the doors open to reveal the woman in Louboutins walks in and everyone is shocked. No one daring to speak as they look back and forth between the young woman and Darlene, waiting to see who speaks first.

“Well, hello everyone. Did you miss me?” the woman smiles taking off her aviators walking to the table,

“What are you doing here (Y/N), you’re supposed to be in Rio” Darlene says with a hint of anger as some others send a glare towards the young woman,

“Well this is a Board meeting isn’t it? And I am a part of the Board still as I am family. Besides I am here to congratulate my dear Uncle in officially taking over the company after all.” (Y/N) replies as she moves to hug Ken,

“Technically yes…..but we thought you wouldn��t be able to make it due to you being out of the country and all” a twenty-six year old African American in a black button up and knee length skirt explains,

“But yet you could inform my cousin Jared who is stationed in Tokyo but not me? Oh well, it’s great I had some urgent business meeting in town with David Industries about our shipping isn’t it Veronica?” (Y/N) sends her a sweet smile that has underlying hatred to it which is returned.

“If this meeting is done, we shall adjeering until the next Board meeting!” a forty-eight Asian woman in a purple button up, black suit jacket and purple pants and black flats says,

“Actually there is one small thing” (Y/N) explains making the ones who got up to sit back down,

“What is it?” a fifty-two caucasian man in dark brown suit asks,

“Well...there will be a new person as Head of this company but it’s not my Uncle Ken” (Y/N),

“What?! What are you talking about? Who?” the elder man in dark brown questions,

“Me” (Y/N) simply says as she is given glares from Veronica, the elder woman in purple, the elder man in dark brown and a few others.

“You can’t take this company! You don’t have the money nor the legal right to claim as the Head!” Veronica laughs as the others do,

“True. But it can be given to me” (Y/N) smirks as the Board members stop laughing in confusion,

“Uncle, please sign here” (Y/N) points to form after she took if out of a folder that her assistant gave her,

“What are you doing? He can’t hand you the company….you’re not his child!” the elder woman in purple demands,

“Again true Susan, but in the bylaws, if a Head of the company wishes to step down he or she can hand it over to their sibling. Which is my Mom Angel” (Y/N) explains as a forty year-old woman in red suit jacket and black button up with red pants stands up from her seat next to where Ken was sitting.

“And then after she signs her name, she’ll be the new Head of this company. But like her dear brother, she doesn’t want to run this company. So, you know what that means” (Y/N) reveals as she flips her hair as she waits for her mom to sign the new forms,

“You can’t do this! We will not stand for this! We won’t let you!” the elder man in dark brown stands in defiance and anger,

“Sit down Robert! You are talking with the new CEO of W&Y International! Now if you wish to go against your CEO and violate your contract with us, please, continue!” (Y/N) commands as Robert glares at you and the others but sits down in a huff.

“Now since that’s all done, I am pleased to say, as your new CEO I vow to lead this company into a new age of prosperity” (Y/N) announces to the Board,

“If that’s all, meeting adjourned until the next Board meeting!” (Y/N) states as everyone gets up again, (Y/N) sits in the red chair and spins to look out the windows.

Veronica, Susan, Robert and other Board members enter the elevator,

“How the hell did she find out about the meeting?” Robert asks angrily,

“I don’t know, but as she is the new CEO, it will be that much harder to get rid of her now!” Susan explains annoyed,

“Do you think she knows it was us who tried to get rid if her?” Veronica questions,

“Let us pray she doesn’t….otherwise we are all in trouble” Robert states as they all agree as the elevator closes.

“So we know how high this goes up now” (Y/N) tells still looking outside as Darlene comes in to the reflection beside her,

“Robert, Susan and Veronica…..I can’t believe they would turn on me. I brought them into our company and this is how they treat us!” Darlene mutters pissed off,

“I don’t know….they seemed a little bit more scared then angry…..there’s more here then we know” (Y/N) says looking back at her grandma,

“I’m sorry for exiling you to Brazil…..” Darlene was gonna apologize,

“No, don’t. I was under attack from the Board as we now know. It wasn’t safe for me to return unless I became the CEO. For some reason they don’t want me here or in control of this company. And I am gonna find out why. This is our family’s company! Our family’s legacy to the world and I’m not gonna let some corrupt Board ruin that! We will take them down together….as a family” (Y/N) turns around and sees Ken, Angel, Jared and the rest of her family still there as she smiles at them.

“Oh and one more thing…..” (Y/N) taps the phone on the table,

“Th-Th...This is Jamie” Jamie states nervously,

“Jamie darling. You’re fired! Clear out of my building” (Y/N) replies smiling,

“Ok” Kamie says sadly,

“Oh and Jamie, tell your friend Klaire downstairs she’s fired too! Thanks, have a nice day!” (Y/N) states while smiling and hangs up.

“2 Pawns down, a unknown number of them left” (Y/N) says sighing as she stands to look back out the window into the beautiful city of Vancouver.

@daydreamingfairy @mummybear @mrs-mitch-rapp93 @obrosey-af @rememberstilinski @mysterysiria @dylanobemineforever @spxderbarnes @blueraindrops @mf-despair-queen @hayley-noelle-salvatore19 @twilightparker @dumbass-stilinski @roscoeknows @totesem

[donvex]

you said you take prompts right?? how about a richie that doesn't see the point of art and a eddie whos a artist, and somehow they fall in love?

Here you go, anon! This prompt hit me with inspiration in the middle of... Well, let’s just say I was in a situation pretty similar to Eddie’s.

I Don’t Like Art, But I Do Like You - AO3 Link

It doesn’t matter that he goes to an art school -

Richie Tozier does not respect art majors.

He just doesn’t, not when they’re all pretentious and useless. The dance majors spend every night partying, and then meet up with the musical theater majors in the morning to dance on the tables in the cafeteria. The crafts majors are a joke before you even get past their name. There’s literally no use for a degree in fucking drawing.

He doesn’t respect them, not when they’re all useless.

Richie actually puts work into his craft. Woodcarving is difficult work that keeps his hands occupied and actually produces something useful in the end. His pieces, if not sold after turning them in for a grade, he can keep and use. Most of the furniture in his apartment is his own - which really saves him money.

And he’s dedicated enough that instead of going out on Saturday night to get wrecked, he tucks himself in early so that he can go into the studios at 6:30am on a Sunday.

Yeah, he’s a pretty great student.

The only downfall to going into the studios early, and on an off-day, is that almost every room is locked. The facilities are shit, to say the least, considering they’re only open twenty four seven during the last two weeks of each semester. And now he’s going to have to scope out the building to see if any floor has an already open room; Otherwise he’s going to have to go down to the security desk again and wait for twenty minutes for someone to bring a key.

Things aren’t looking great when he reaches the fourth floor and finds all the woodshop studios locked tight, but he doesn’t actually need the woodshop today. It’s just some prep work for his final project. There’s a whole lotta work to put down on paper before he’s ready to start building. So, since he doesn’t need the woodshop he decides to scour the rest of the building for an empty room.

The fibers floor isn’t even split into a bunch of studios. It’s just three long hallways that are, in themselves, studios - and all three hallways are locked. The illustration floor, two up from fibers and proudly displaying a glistening display case filled with art work, is equally useless. But snugged in between, past a small gallery and the lightbox room - is the guillotine. Richie doesn’t typically have need for the paper cutter, save on rare occasions where he needs to mat and display his blueprints, but he knows it’s there. And, to his surprise and pleasure, the light in the room is on.

Which means it’s open.

Which also means someone must be inside.

Richie’s first thought upon opening the door is fuck, I got beat out. That thought is quickly followed by a string of I was right, there is someone inside and oh god, it’s gonna be a useless visual arts major.

And, again, he’s right.

The single, large table in the room is covered in a stack of objects. Sketchbooks are flipped open to thumbnails and references, larger printed sketches with value are taped down beside that, and neon colored pencils spill out from a lavender colored tote. Several plastic containers are laid out, filled with water, watercolor tablets, and some remnants of paint mixing. A laptop is angled between them, the screen filled with photos and the speakers quietly playing music.

And, the crowning jewel - there’s a cute boy at the center of it all, frowning in Richie’s direction.

“You’re covered in fucking dust.”

Oh. Oh no. Richie likes that.

But, he reminds himself, he also likes his dust.

“Yeah, that comes from hours of working hard, short stuff. Using the whole table?” Richie leans against the doorframe, making it clear he isn’t going anywhere. He crosses his ankles, his scuffed up boots dragging across the floor. He would be going for a kind of rugged look, if it wasn’t for the fact that his denim jacket was hand-dyed to be bright pink.

“What’s the point of not utilizing my space when no one else is here?”

“Well, it didn’t take long for someone to show up, did it?” Richie is grinning, feeling like he holds the upper hand. There’s no real reason for him to be an asshole right now, but according to him, it’s part of his charm. It’s supposed to be endearing.

The kid does not seem to find it endearing in anyway. He just snorts and fixes a pointed look on Richie.

“It took sixteen hours.”

Richie is visibly confused, and the kid laughs at him. It’s more of a bark, but Richie hesitantly labels it as, well, endearing.

What he’s supposed to be, right now.

“I’ve been here since 3pm yesterday. You wanna share the table? Sure. You wanna be a dick about it? I’ve been staked out here on and off for the past five nights, you can go back to your own floor.”

Richie is...floored. Astonished. Confused?

This kid, this visual artist, has been here for sixteen hours. Sixteen hours on a Saturday night. Into a Sunday morning. And more than that, this isn’t even the first night.

“You gotta be a wreck.” There’s something new in Richie’s voice, something eerily close to a begrudging respect.

“Yeah, most of the illustration students are.”

Oh. Oh no again.

This kid isn’t just cute, he’s funny. He’s got a spark. Richie doesn’t think he can stand for that, not if he still intends on disrespecting visual artists.

“When are you going home?”

“God, you’re that desperate to take this room from me? I’ll probably go home around noon, but I’m coming back tonight. I need this done for my six hour studio tomorrow.”

Richie finally pulls out a stool and leans directly into this kid’s space, actually looking at what he’s working on. It’s a series of record covers, from what he can tell. He’s actually kind of fascinated by the layout, there’s obviously a lot of planning gone into it. Even the lettering is styled, pages of calligraphy and designs laid out next to the finalized sketch. The kid doesn’t push him away, either. He lets Richie take it all in, and after a few moments, quietly starts pointing out his favorite parts.

It’s quiet and soft. It’s still the early hours, when most people aren’t in the studios to begin with, and they have the room all to themselves. Richie thinks of a few questions to ask, and the more he pushes, the more interested he is. This kid has an answer for everything, and a good one. It’s not as bullshit as Richie thought it was.

Eventually this kid points to the sunrise, and Richie thinks for a moment that he’s going to take it all back if he has to pause for a picture, but again, he’s surprised.

“Look at that piece of shit,” Eddie grumbles. “That goddamn orange dot is supposed to make staying up worth it? Who cares that I just gave up an entire night of sleep when I get to see the fucking sunrise! Yeah, sure.”

Richie thinks he’s gonna piss himself from laughing so hard, or at least fall off the stool.

It’s still early, to be fair. And he hasn’t had coffee or breakfast. And he was immediately thrown off his game when he met an artist who’s actually competent. So he doesn’t think he can be completely to blame when his filter isn’t as strong as it should be.

“I think I’m in love with you. I think I’m in love with you and I don’t even know your name.”

He gets pushed off his stool.

(It’s worth it, though, when he looks up to a pair of shining eyes and the words “It’s Eddie.”)

[pjbehindthesun]

chapter 5: yellow daisies and white rabbits

Sunday, June 24th, 1990

I shuffle my high tops in front of her door uncertainly while I wait for her to answer my knock. Has it been long enough that I should knock again? Would that seem needy or demanding? Maybe she just didn’t hear me the first time, right? Or maybe I’m being creepy enough just by showing up on her doorstep unannounced and I’d better not push my luck. I’m just about to lose my nerve and turn around when Lucy answers the door, wiping her hands on a turquoise dish rag.

“Hi, Jeff!” She says, looking pleasantly surprised, and her smile blows away all my anxiety like a warm breeze. Until she furrows her brow. “Wait, how did you know which apartment was mine?”

Busted. “I, uh…” I’m mumbling to the dingy carpet in the hall, “I remembered your last name and I checked the mailboxes in the lobby.”

But instead of slamming the door in my face for being a desperate stalker, that smile dawns over her face again. “What for?”

“I, uh,” I try to fight some words out past the grin on my face, “I think I just felt bad that my drunk idiot friends just took over your car last night and we didn’t get to, like, say goodnight, it was just sort of rushed.”

I had been trying so hard to get fuckin’ wasted Stone and Mike quietly up to my apartment to sleep it off that I barely got to wave goodbye to her as we continued up the stairs, and all I’ve wanted to do since then is run back down here, find her apartment, and keep asking her all about her life story, getting to know every little thing about her. The hour that I got to spend talking to her at the Off-Ramp last night (after we found a spot outside where our various asshole friends couldn’t interrupt us anymore) was the most exhilarating hour I’ve spent in I don’t know how long. My slightly hungover friends shuffled off this morning, and I’ve basically just been pathetically wasting time ever since, watching the clock and trying to figure out when’s an appropriate time to show up at her door.

“Well, you’re either really late or really early, it’s like 12:30,” she giggles, leaning against the door frame.

“So I guess we just have to keep talking, then. Kill time until the next goodnight.”

“Seems like our only option.”

“Well, uh, and only if I’m not interrupting anything, that is… since we’re powerless against the force of time and all, do you… wanna go get some lunch while we wait?” Please say yes. Please say yes. I have no idea where I’m finding all this courage, except from the smile that she’s giving me that feels like a sunrise in my chest.

She nods with a little flush of her cheeks, and I have to fight to keep myself from jumping in the air from the adrenaline. “Let me just grab my bag… wanna come in for a second?”

I edge inside her apartment while she ducks down the hallway and into her bedroom. It’s the same layout as mine, just flipped around on the opposite side of the hall. The same boring curdled cream-cheese colored walls, the same scratched up wood floors, the same cheap dingy kitchen. That’s where the similarities end, and I’m disoriented and fascinated by everything else.

Everything in here is a different, vivid color. In the kitchen, she’s hand-painted a trail of daisies on the wall over the tops of the cabinets, and the dishes in her drying rack are bright yellow to match. On the wall leading out of the kitchen, there are some bizarre old botanical drawings in beat-up wooden frames, and the windows are flanked with glittering patterned purple curtains. In the window seat, she’s got a bunch of orchids and cactii in brightly colored pots under an array of neon paper lanterns. The living room… the living room is something else. There’s a beat-up but ornate blue velvet couch, a giant golden tassled floor pillow, and a screaming orange floral recliner resting on an ancient Persian rug. I’m just craning my neck down the hallway to get a load of the mosaic of mismatched, loudly patterned Moroccan tiles covering the wall when Lucy bounces back out of her room, slinging a little light blue backpack over her shoulder.

She gives me a smile that’s almost a wince or a squint, the way it wrinkles her nose. “….what?”

“This… this is your place?”

“Uhm, if it’s not then my life’s about to get a lot more surreal… why? You hate it, right?”

“No! No. It’s insane. I love it. It’s like you live in a fucking Basquiat or something.” I’m grinning like a fool but I don’t care. Something about this place just makes me so deeply happy. It’s all so bright, and chaotic, and loud, and off-beat, and mysterious, and confusing, but somehow so coherent.

She nods. “Somewhat less thought-provoking social commentary. And less heroin.”

“Let me go on the record saying that both of those modifications are fine. Where the hell did you find all of this stuff??”

“Uhm, well, a lot of it I found at garage sales and random thrift shops. Some of it I made, like that” – she waves at the cornea-searing orange chair – “well, I upholstered it anyway, and those” – the curtains – “but the rest of it I’ve just picked up all over the place.”

“Wow. I mean, I’ve picked stuff up off curbs and yard sales for my place too, but it’s all beige and brown and boring.”

Lucy giggles. “And yet you’re the artiste, hmm?”

“Hey be nice, I never said I knew shit about interior design,” I chuckle.

“It’s a lot in here, I know,” she hedges, toying with her hands as we make our way to her front door.

“It’s pretty perfect, is what it is,” I mumble, and I’m not sure if I’m even still talking about her apartment. “So, where should we go?”

***

“Cora? Hey, CORA! WAIT UP!”

The bell at the top of the door to the Cyclops is still ringing in my ear as I step out onto 1st Street and try to figure out who’s yelling at me. I spot Stone about a half a block south of me, waving his arms and breaking into a jog with Mike trailing behind him, toting two guitars over his shoulder.

“Hey, stalkers,” I grin as they catch up to me. “Stone, I thought you weren’t speaking to me after last night.”

“I really shouldn’t, what with the restraining order and all.”

Mike’s watching us with a completely lost expression on his face. Oh, poor thing was so drunk he doesn’t even remember the ride home. “Sorry Mikey, Stone here got his feelings hurt over some crap on the radio.” Mike mouths a knowing “ahh” with a nod.

“Crap on the radio?? See, this is why the court ordered you to stay 500 feet from me. I can’t have someone brutally assaulting my taste in music all the time.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t recognize the ruling, on the grounds that loving Steely Dan that much cannot lawfully be described as ‘taste.’”

Stone gapes at me in horror. “You’re a monster, Red.”

“Takes one to know one. How long have you been following me, creep?”

“Ha ha,” Stone drawls. “We were actually just heading to your building.”

“That makes it so much less creepy, obviously.”

“To see Jeff,” Mike injects. “Stone’s piece of shit car won’t start so we left it back on 3rd. We’re trying to get up to a guitar place in Fremont to get these things looked at, so we were gonna try to bum a ride from Jeff.”

Mike checks his watch with an anxious look, so I start taking baby steps north towards home, and the guys follow along.

“What were you doing up on 3rd? Do you guys live around here too?”

“No, I actually live up by Fremont and Stone here lives with his parents, which is an extremely rock and roll thing for a 23 year old to do.” Mike cracks me up with an exaggerated serious look.

“Whatever, assholes,” Stone grumbles. “Anyway we were just checking out this new practice space back that way. I think it’s gonna work out, so we might be your neighbors soon after all… please, not on the street,” he says as I mime puking in my mouth.

When we get back to my building, Jeff’s not answering the buzzer, even though the guys spotted his car in the parking lot. Stone’s brainstorming out loud about jogging back to a payphone to call a cab and Mike’s fidgeting and cursing Jeff’s name when I decide to speak up. After all, Alex is gone for the afternoon with his buddies, I’ve got nowhere to be.

“Listen, I can drive you guys. You said Fremont, right? That’s not far.”

“Yeah?” Stone asks with a skeptical expression, but Mike’s already making a beeline toward the line of cars I waved towards as I spoke.

“Excellent. Which one’s yours?”

“The white Rabbit,” I say, grabbing my keys from my pocket and pointing at it. Stone’s shoulders drop as he issues the eye roll to end all eye rolls.

“Okay, Grace Slick. You sure you don’t mind?”

“Not at all. I’d give you a jump but the cables are in Alex’s trunk, I think.”

“Of course. Thanks Alex,” Stone says in an acerbic tone, his face darkening into a frown. “Really, you don’t mind? It might take a while, Mike’s a freak about letting anyone work on his guitar.”

“Dude, she said it was fine, let’s go! Shotgun!” says Mike, who’s already hanging on my passenger side door handle like a child, and I let them both into the car.

“So, what are we listening to?” Mike’s rummaging through my tapes as Stone belts himself into the back seat.

“Please, dear sweet god, no hillbilly tunes.”

“STONE GOSSARD IF YOU CALL ME A HILLBILLY ONE MORE TIME –”

“Ooh! Rust Never Sleeps.” Mike pops the tape in with a contented grin.

The sniff that comes from Stone as I fire up the engine indicates that even he can’t think of an objection to Neil, and I quickly stifle a smile so he won’t catch it.

“So this practice space? Does that mean you guys are getting more serious about getting a new band going?” I ask as we turn onto 1st, with Mike occasionally reminding me of directions.

“Oh yeah. Born serious, baby,” Stone says, leaning forward and sticking his face between the front seats.

“Yeah, well if you’re so serious, you’d work harder to get Jeff on board,” Mike shoots him a pointed look.

“Not that crap again, Mike.”

“I mean it! We’ve gotta get Jeff Ament in here.”

“Fuck Jeff Ament.” Stone sits back in a huff, and Mike and I exchange significant looks.

“I thought he was your guy?” Mike asks. “You’ve been playing together forever!”

“That doesn’t mean shit. He’s my friend and all, but I can’t be in a band with him again. I can’t handle his fucking attitude anymore.”

I was going to stay out of it since I obviously don’t know the whole story, but come on. “His attitude? Really? That’s what you’re going with?”

Laughter explodes out of Mike as Stone punches the back of my seat.

“She’s got a point, dude,” Mike notes. “I’m pretty sure it took two of you to fuck things up this badly.”

Stone mutters something about a fucking ambush under his breath before grudgingly saying something to the effect of, “I guess I can give it a shot,” making Mike pump his fist and grin.

*

We unload in front of this dingy little music shop that Mike directed us to, and he gingerly picks up the guitars and practically sprints for the door. Stone and I share a shrug before following him inside.

A blast of freezing air hits us as soon as we walk inside, and I shiver involuntarily.

Stone casts a lazy glance over at me before looking over at a wall of guitars. “Cold, Red? Some Arctic explorer you must be.”

“Shut up, Stoner, you forget I’m a Southerner. It’s fucking frigid in here. Come here.” I rest my hands against the little bit of skinny upper arm sticking out from under his shirt sleeve, alternating pressing my fingers front and back to warm them up. He slowly looks over and down at me with his mouth slightly open and massive eyes that remind me of an owl’s.

“Haha okay okay fine, personal space,” I joke, pulling my hands back and stepping away. Stone’s still gazing at me with the same hallucinatory look as the shop clerk heads to the back of the store carrying the guys’ two guitars, with Mike on his heels and peppering him with a million nervous questions.

Stone’s stare is starting to freak me out, so I move away from him to the wall of guitars and brush the strings of an acoustic with my thumb a couple of times. Unable to help myself, I pull it down from the wall and strum a couple of sloppy chords.

“Do you play?” Stone says from just behind me. I might have jumped, except that his voice is so quiet.

“What? No, no. I’m awful.”

“Which is it?”

“Huh?”

“You don’t play, or you’re awful?” he asks, still in that same hushed tone, peering down over my shoulder.

“Two things can be true.”

“You’re, uh, you’re muting that string. Here, like this…” he takes my hand in his, very carefully adjusting the angle of my fingers on the strings. I want more than anything to sneer at him, but as I play around among the small handful of chords I know, I have to admit that tiny adjustment made things a lot easier. He drops his hand back to his side and listens.

“Thanks,” I glance up at him, and he quickly looks away at another guitar up on the wall.

“Uh, sure,” he coughs. “So did you teach yourself, or what? Because you were right, you’re pretty fucking terrible.”

“You’re a peach. Uhm, I learned a few things a long time ago, but yeah, I guess I mostly taught myself.” Dad taught me to play when I was 8, but I’m not about to tell this guy I barely know about that.

“Well, it shows.” Just like last night, there’s that snide tone accompanied with an encouraging smile, just pleading for me to see through his bullshit and play along.

“And I suppose you’re Hendrix, huh?”

“Nah, that’s Mike. I prefer Page, myself.”

“And so modest, too.” He bats his eyelashes at me. “So you think you’ll really talk to Jeff, or –?”

“Oh Jesus, not you too. Yeah, I’ll talk to him.” There’s a snap in his voice that wasn’t there before, so it’s clearly off-limits and I let the subject drop. I hang the guitar back up, and he seems to sense that he’s been a little spiky.

“So what’s life like for you this summer? I mean, you’re a student, obviously you don’t have class, but you’re still working?” He’s fumbling his words a little, trying to recover.

“Yeah, when you’re a grad student, your work is never done. And if it is, you’re doing it wrong.”

“Sounds fulfilling as a flesh-eating parasite.”

“You’re not wrong. Anyway, I’m actually going to Alaska next Friday for three weeks. Soil sampling trip.”

“No way? Wait, when do you get back?”

I scrunch up my face while I hunt for the date in my mind. “The 20th, I think. Why?” I ask, suspicious of the huge grin dawning on his face.

“That’s my birthday. And Chris’s. He’ll be back from their European tour by then and we’re having a party, you should try and make it. And bring this fabled boyfriend of yours. If you don’t freeze to death up north, that is…”

I’m trying to decide whether to punch him in the shoulder for being a dick or thank him sincerely for the invitation when Mike appears out of nowhere, looking a little brokenhearted.

“Gonna need a few days for repairs,” he mumbles. “You guys ready to get out of here or what?”

***

“You did not.”

“Are you calling me a liar?”

“No, no, you just didn’t strike me as the type to…”

“…castrate something? You underestimated me, clearly.”

“Clearly,” Jeff says with a wide-eyed smile that’s somewhere between amused and terrified. “How did you… how?”

“One of my best friends back home lived on a cattle ranch, and I used to help her family with the calves all the time. Castration’s not a big deal –”

“That depends on which end of the knife you’re on, Lucy!” he shrieks.

“Okay, so I didn’t actually wield the knife…”

“I knew it! Thank fuck.”

“Haha can I finish? It’s really not a big deal, you just need someone who can help hold the calf down on one end and someone who can sprinkle cauterizing powder on when it’s done. It’s over really fast and they heal super quickly. I usually did the powder part but when they were small enough I could help hold them too.”

“Jesus, Lucy. Remind me never to piss you off.”

“Oh come on, you never encountered shit like this in Montana? You said you lived in cow country too, right?”

“Yeah, but the difference is that I got out of there as fast as humanly possible. I didn’t hang around the ranches, I hung around my hippie uncle with the record collection.”

His expression darkens a little bit when he’s talking about where he grew up, so it’s probably best to change the subject. “You said you got out of there fast? Did you come straight to Seattle, then?”

Nothing makes him light up more than talking about music or art, and I’m completely mesmerized by his face and the excitement in his voice as he tells me about the time he went to California when he was 12, how that trip connected him to skating, to punk music, and to everything outside of Big Sandy that he wished he could have. How he couldn’t wait to go to college just to find some like-minded people, but even then, he could only find a handful of other guys in Missoula who were into punk rock. How even that tenuous little tribe wasn’t enough of a home to keep him there when the college decided to close down his graphic design program, and how he came to Seattle looking for more. As we’re walking back home from lunch and he’s telling me all of this, and I think about everything he told me last night at the Off Ramp about Mother Love Bone and Andy, I marvel at how intensely protective I feel of him already. I’m the typical clichéd small town kid who left home looking to belong, too, so I understand where he’s coming from, but I don’t know if I’ve ever met someone who feels that drive quite as fundamentally as Jeff still does, even all these years later. Except maybe Cora. Sort of funny that they have that intensity in common.

We round the corner and wander into the parking lot of our building, in no real hurry to get home or anywhere else in particular, still talking about what brought each of us to Seattle, when I notice Cor’s rusty little white Rabbit pulling off the main road. I take Jeff’s hand and give it a quick squeeze. “Let’s go say hi!”

He trails behind me but allows himself to be led over to the car, and he looks as surprised as I feel when Stone and Mike climb out along with Cora.

“The fuck are you doing hanging out with these two losers?” he laughs at her.

“Bite me, Jeff,” Stone grumbles. “Hey, can you do me a favor?”

“Can you even hear yourself when you talk?” Jeff asks, shaking his head, but Stone continues undeterred.

“My car needs a jump back on 3rd, and I wanted to show you something over there anyway. Can you give us a lift back?”

Jeff glances back at me and it’s immediately clear he’s thinking the same thing – shit, not again, why do the same people have to keep interrupting us?

“Uhm, yeah, man, sure. Just, uh, give me a minute.”

“Lucy!” Cora calls. “Are we hanging out tonight?”

“Yeah, of course. Let me call you later though? I had a huge lunch, I need a nap.” She’s smirking at me and I know for sure that she isn’t buying it, but at least she has enough sense to nod along and keep Stone busy outside for a few minutes. She strikes up a conversation with him about something, but I don’t care enough to eavesdrop as I shoot a grin at Jeff.

I follow him upstairs to the third floor, and once I key into my apartment, I turn around to face him.

“Hey, I’m really glad you tracked me down,” I say, picking his hand up in mine and giving it a squeeze.

“Stalked you, is more like it.”

“Well, I’m glad you stalked me,” I giggle. “You should do it again sometime.”

“Promise,” Jeff says in a low voice that makes my heart thud. He leans against my door frame. “Maybe tomorrow night? Second date?”

“Wait, was this our first?”

“Shit, that’s how smooth I am, you didn’t even know it was happening,” he laughs, and I could swear he’s blushing just a little.

“I think you’re smoother than you think,” I grin, biting my lip as he leans in a little closer.

“I think you’re trying to spare my feelings.”

“I think… I think you should go help your friends, they’re waiting.” But I lean in anyway, savoring the way time has slowed down.

“I think they can wait a little longer.” And as his lips find mine, I’d have to agree.

***

Monday, June 25th, 1990

I’m still daydreaming about our kiss, way up on Cloud Nine, as I make my way through the mostly deserted hallway to my desk. Not even Greta’s customary bitching when I asked her how her weekend went could kill this high. I drop my lunch in the break room, wondering whether I’ll get to see him again tonight, and the only thing that breaks my reverie is an unfamiliar package sitting on my desk. What the hell?

It’s wrapped in beautiful blue paper with a silver ribbon. Cautiously, I check the card to confirm that it’s actually addressed to me, which it is, and I look around for answers but of course no one else is here yet. No one’s ever sent me a present at work before – there’s no way Jeff did this after only one date, right? …right?

I slide the paper off the box, which is a glitzy golden color, and when I open the lid, a folded piece of paper falls on top of the ornately decorated chocolate covered strawberries inside. I crack it open with a shaky hand and eventually decipher the loopy scrawl:

“In defense against the strawberry-free life. Yours, Jake.”

What?

After racking my brain for several minutes, I remember our conversation at the end of last week about his patient, the one with the allergy. He seriously thought about that all weekend? And bought me strawberries because of it?

Wait… “yours”?

…oh, shit.

[rrrawrf-writes]

22 & 67 for the drabble ask if u do not mind

okay so look

this is painfully long

because i am an idiot

who thought “let’s do one thing for each prompt” because i couldn’t figure out how to put the two of them together

so uh

i apologize. i’m so sorry this took so long, and is so long.

battle buddies for the first one! don’t worry, something (probably???) nice happens to rhiot this time o3o

22. “Did you just hiss at me?”

“What’s down there?” Rhiot asked, yawning as he stumbled downstairs. Loula was already down the hall and at the top of the stairs leading into the basement. Mercado, Hunt, and Parker all crowded the area, glaring down into the darkness.

“We don’t know,” Mercado huffed. “But I’m giving it three seconds to get out before I get my guns!”

She raised her voice to shout downstairs, while Parker gave Rhiot a crooked grin.

“No guns in the clubhouse, Mercy,” he told her. “Since you’re the last one up, Archer, you can go downstairs.”

“What?” Rhiot said, his sleep-fuddled mind still trying to play catch-up. “What for?”

“You gotta see what it is,” Hunt put in helpfully. He moved aside to give Rhiot access. Mercado crouched down on her haunches, her usually straight brown hair now a wild mess. “Parker says he thought he heard someone crying.”

“It’s your house, Parker, you go look,” Rhiot muttered.

“As ranking officer and your host for the week -”

Rhiot waved a hand at him to shut him up. “Yeah, all right, fine, I’ll go. C’mon, Loula.”

He was five steps into the basement when he realized that Loula still waited at the top of the stairs. Rhiot paused, looking back up at her, and she gave an apologetic, mental sort of shrug, lying down.

“Traitor,” Rhiot complained. He could hear the rest of his unit snickering as he clomped down the rest of the stairs, running his hand over the wall to look for a light switch. When he found it, he flicked it a couple times, and was completely unsurprised to find that it didn’t work.

“If this’s some kinda joke, I’m tying you all in to Dixon’s dreams again,” he called upstairs. “Change your lightbulbs, Parker, honestly.”

“Oh, gross, Archer,” Mercado complained. “I’d take your nightmares over Dixon’s fantasies any day.”

“Seriously,” Hunt muttered.

“It’s a toss-up for me,” Parker admitted with a chuckle. “Archer dreams up some pretty horrific things.”

“So does Dixon,” Mercy said. Rhiot shunted their conversation to the back of his mind as he waited for his eyes to adjust. Parker didn’t stay very much at his house, and it showed - furniture and storage totes crowded the basement, and Rhiot banged his shins three different times as he made his way towards the darker corner of the room.

“Hello?”

He paused in what he felt was the center of the room, but he honestly had no idea. He could barely make out the shapes of all the junk Parker had stored down here. After a moment, he heard scuffling coming from a corner, and slowly moved his way over.

Loula padded down the stairs, a moment later, with a flashlight in her mouth. Rhiot accepted it gratefully, and waved her back to stay near the stairs as he clicked it on.

He saw a flash of eyes, and then a flurry of movement as something - someone? - squeaked and dove behind a mattress wrapped in plastic, slanted against the wall. Rhiot sighed, then with more exasperation than bravery, squatted down at the opening of the little nook, shining the flashlight on a small child, curled up into a tight ball at the very back of the narrow space.

They made an incredibly cat-like noise.

“Did you just hiss at me?” Rhiot asked, bemused.

“Hey, Archie, what is it?” Mercy called downstairs. Rhiot ignored her and set the flashlight down.

“Hey, come on out, it’s all right,” he told the child. There was something wrong with her - his? - ears. They were far too long and pointy, and their skin was a completely wrong color.

It took nearly ten minutes of coaxing and shouting upstairs for the others to shut up, before Rhiot sighed and sat back. Loula immediately stuck her nose into the hidey-hole, and the child gasped.

Instead of trying to curl themselves into an ever-tighter ball of anxiety, they immediately crawled towards Loula. She backed up, huffing gently, and Rhiot scooted to the side so he inadvertently wouldn’t frighten the child again.

In the brighter beam of the flashlight, it was clear to see what was so off-putting about the child. They were covered in short, calico-patterned fur, and wore nothing but an overlong nightshirt, with a tail - a tail - swishing from underneath. They were bare-foot, with short-cropped hair and cat ears. Cat ears.

Rhiot bit down on his tongue. Instead of screaming ‘what’s wrong with you!’ like he wanted, he said, in a somewhat strangled voice, “Are - Are you all right?”

The child ignored him. Instead, they wrapped their arms around Loula, digging their fingers into her fur. Rhiot tensed up at the secondhand sensation of hands pressing against his back and shoulder. As he watched, the little kid changed.

Their fur grew longer, a bit shaggier, taking on the brindling of Loula’s fur, and the tail likewise went from sleek to bushy and thick. Their ears lengthened, and twitched when they heard Parker’s heavy footsteps thumping down the stairs.

“Hey, Archer, you get ‘em out - oh, what the hell -”

Rhiot glanced up at his commanding officer. “I think they’re a shapeshifter.”

and now we’re back to rembrandt being a terrible person to winn. this happens directly after rembrant shooting winn in the leg.

67. “You’re bleeding all over my carpet.”

Rembrandt didn’t know why he was surprised when he came back to the penthouse, and found Huntington on top of Winn, slamming a fist into the smaller man’s face.

Rolling his eyes, Rembrandt flipped on the lights and said, “Don’t kill him, Mr. Huntington.”

Huntington just grunted. It wasn’t until Rembrandt had moved into the kitchen that Huntington finally let their prisoner up. Winn coughed and threw a few meager curses at the both of them.

“I thought I told you to shoot him if he tried anything.” Rembrandt leaned against the wall where the kitchen fed into the living room, a glass of water in his hand.

“You left the moron without a bloody gun,” Winn mumbled thickly from the floor.

Rembrandt watched Winn pick himself slowly off the floor, like an infant trying to learn how to walk, then frowned. “You’re bleeding all over my carpet.”

Winn pressed a hand to his mouth; it and his nose both bled. A few drops had already spattered to the floor.

“Thought you said this —— eyesore was a fake,” Winn groused. His eyes darted to the window, but Huntington had stationed himself near it. Rembrandt knew someone was just outside the door to the hall, and he himself stood between Winn and any exits from the back of the penthouse. Rembrandt smiled into his glass, enjoying the resignation settling onto Winn’s face.

“It is,” Rembrandt conceded, and pointed his glass at Winn’s feet, now removed from said eyesore. “But you’re standing on my white carpet, not the rug.”

Droplets of red stood out starkly against the carpet. Rembrandt had brought out the rug specifically to keep Winn’s mess from getting all over his apartment. He should have known better. Rembrandt would have to remind Huntington to be more careful next time.

Winn stared at him for a moment. Then he cupped a hand over his split lip and bleeding nose. Winn brought it away a few seconds later; staring Rembrandt dead in the face, Winn flicked his wrist, sprinkling fresh blood onto the carpet.

Closing his eyes, Rembrandt resisted the urge to smash his glass into Winn’s face. “Come with me,” he said instead.

To his surprise and satisfaction, Winn limped after Rembrandt, clearly too exhausted to resist. Huntington walked right behind Winn, breathing down his neck. Reaching the door several yards ahead of Winn, Rembrandt watched the ex-con brace himself against the wall every few steps, favoring his wounded leg. As much as Rembrandt would have loved to leave Winn in that sort of pain, another visit from Weston might be necessary - Rembrandt needed to get the codes first. Then he could cripple Winn any way he liked.

The back room had an enormous window and balcony. Rembrandt glanced to Winn as they entered, but the ex-con ignored the view - he must have finally learned to stop telegraphing his intentions. Too bad for Winn - Rembrandt wasn’t stupid. He tilted his head for Huntington to, once again, lurk near the window.

There was nothing in the room Winn could use. The bed had been stripped of blankets and sheets; besides a small bundle of clothes on top of it, there was nothing else in the room. Rembrandt nodded to the clothes. “Go ahead and change.”

“Mind giving a man some privacy?”

Rembrandt snorted a laugh. “‘A man’,” he repeated, and smiled blandly at Winn. He didn’t move. Winn scoffed and reached over to pick up the clothes.

Rembrandt made Winn stop mid-change after he had stripped off every inch of clothing, forcing Winn to show his open hands. While Winn pulled on a clean set of boxers, Rembrandt went through the pockets of his torn and bloodied jeans.

Winn had a mess of items in his pockets; besides an inordinate amount of change and dollar bills, the most interesting acquisition was three different pocket knives (one of which Huntington claimed with a glower). The hem of Winn’s sweater turned out to be more interesting: Rembrandt found three slim lockpicking wires tucked into the lining.

“Still using Miss Ryder’s old tricks, are we?” Rembrandt asked. Winn had his back to them as he pulled a pair of too-big jeans over his narrow hips, but Rembrandt could see his ears and the back of his neck turn bright pink.

“Screw* you,” Winn muttered savagely. He reached for the shirt on the bed, but Rembrandt stopped him.

“What’s on your back?” Rembrandt asked, tilting his head to the side to try and get a better look. The glance Winn shot him was a picture: rage, humiliation, and shame, all at once.

“Nothing.”

“Show me.”

“Screw.* You.”

Rembrandt rocked back on his heels, eyebrows arched, and then carefully began to unbutton his suit coat. Winn must have understood the motion, and the implied threat; Rembrandt preferred to keep his revolver underneath his jacket, and it was freshly-loaded.

With a sigh of disgust - at himself, Rembrandt thought - Winn dropped the shirt and put his back to Rembrandt.

Scars covered Winn’s back, slightly raised, in a pattern that was far from random. Wings spread out across his skin, a pattern that was surprisingly intricate for the usual scarification process - and beyond that, it had healed perfectly, without a single blemish that Rembrandt could see. A few feathers trailed across Winn’s shoulders and down either arm. The ex-con held one elbow, shoulders hunched, like he was embarrassed by the work of art branded into the skin of his back.

Rembrandt stepped closer and reached out to brush his fingers over the upraised scars. Winn flinched away, and half-turned to - presumably - curse or cry or otherwise waste the perfectly good air he breathed in. Before Winn could more than turn his head, though, Rembrandt grabbed the back of his neck and his arm, and shoved Winn face-first into the wall.

Rembrandt stretched Winn’s arm out. An old burn scar - a harsh one - ran down the side of his forearm. Whoever had etched those wings into Winn’s back had worked here, as well: thin white lines outlined the burn scar in a sort of bracer effect, reminiscent of celtic knotwork.

He let go of Winn’s arm, but only reached for the other one, transferring his left hand to Winn’s neck. A similar effect had been wrought on Winn’s other arm, but instead of encompassing a burn scar, the scarification patterns wrapped around something more jagged and random - they almost looked like bite marks. “This is Ripper’s work, isn’t it?”

Winn turned his head against the wall to shoot Rembrandt a glare. “Get off me.”

Rembrandt did not let go. He could practically feel the fury and humiliation radiating from Winn’s reddened face as he leaned forward, until Rembrandt’s forehead rested against the wall right next to Winn’s. He gave the younger man a sly smile.

“I have a friend in the PCC,” Rembrandt said conversationally. “I was just so concerned when you were sentenced your whole five years of prison that I got in touch with him, asked him to watch over you. Take good care of you.”

Winn ground his teeth so hard Rembrandt could hear his jaw creak.

“An appointment with Ripper - that must’ve been one hell of a favor, Winn,” Rembrandt said. “It’s beautiful.”

Rembrandt let go of Winn and stepped back - and right on cue, the ex-con whirled around, furious and red-faced - and was he crying again?

“It was —— torture!” Winn yelled. He lunged for Rembrandt - who stepped easily to the side, did a quick mental calculation, and punched Winn in the thigh.

He hadn’t thought he’d hit the bullet wound, but Rembrandt must have gotten close enough, because Winn’s face went ghost-pale, and he collapsed to the floor with a sob. Huntington, always a moment too late, thundered over to glower down at Winn, curled up on the floor.

Rembrandt dropped the spare shirt on top of Winn. “Get dressed,” he told him, “and then get into the closet.”

Winn pulled the shirt off his face, rolling over onto his side. He spewed a litany of foul language instead, which completely unimpressed Rembrandt. Glancing over to Huntington, Rembrandt nodded towards the walk-in closet in question.

“Get off me,” Winn snarled, as Huntington reached down and grabbed him by the arms. Rembrandt tucked his hands in his pocket and leaned back against the wall, enjoying the fear and anger that flashed onto Winn’s face. “Don’t - Don’t put me in there -”

“It’s not that much smaller than your cell in solitary,” Rembrandt remarked, as Huntington tossed Winn into the closet. He slammed the door close before Winn could regain his feet. Rembrandt raised his voice a little, just to make sure he was heard over the ex-con’s furious demands. “If you behave, maybe we’ll let you out on good behavior. Goodnight, Winn.”

[sickofyourfandombullshit]

Heathers 2018

So when I saw @princess-has-a-pen​ post about the new Heathers remake I had to look it up for two reasons:

1. I’m a huge fan of the Movie and Musical and 2. I had to see the fucking horror show that Spike TV was no doubt going to turn it into.

Now Princess asked in their tags the exact same thing I asked myself when I saw the post:

“Why?”

Well friends, strap yourselves in cuz I’m about to take you for a fucking ride.

Why remake Heathers? A movie that has solidified itself as a cult classic for it’s gritty, fucked up story and characters that took pretty much every kid who went to high school in the 80′s (or any time really) life and amped it up to 11?

Cuz the original Heathers is full of 'problematic' things and they can now remake it to be more 'progressive' while snagging a new audiance of younglings who know about Heathers because of the musical.

Now my friends, as I stated before, I love both the movie and the Musical, but as a mature, rational fan over the age of 30, I can look at something I love and point out it’s flaws and believe me, when it comes to the source material, Heathers the Musical is stuffed full of flaws and that creates some problems.

I am pretty sure all the Tumblrinas who idolize ‘Heathers’ have only seen the musical because honestly, the ‘date’ scene where Heather McNamara gets raped in the background would be enough to make them REEEEEE all the way to the fucking bank.

Like legit, she is literally struggling under her date (and not in a fun way) to make him stop and Veronica just fucking leaves her there. We don’t see her get away or anything, so you can only assume that that whole thing didn’t end well, especially given how miserable McNamara is in the movie to begin with.

The Muscial made light of a lot of the grim parts the movie worked to highlight, specifically bullying and suicide and the dangers of giving into pressure and just  being a fucking terrible human being. Not to mention it twisted things in a way that actually reinforced some harmful tropes. Specifically with the two main characters JD and Heather.

JD in the movie is a completely sociopath who physically and mentally abuses Veronica for almost the entire thing and in the Musical they gave him the stereotypical ‘troubled boy who wanted to make the world better but it just got out of hand’ treatment. Like “Oh yeah, he murders three people and tries to blow up a school but his dad’s a jerk and his mommy committed suicide so you can’t blame him! Deep down he’s just a tortured soul who really loves Veronica!”. Spoilers! He doesn’t love Veronica, at least not in any way that should be even entertained as any sort of ‘love’. He and Veronica’s relationship coupled with his ‘sacrifice’ at the end of the play made me cringe extra hard because it felt like it was romanticizing abusive relationships and in all honesty it was. A specific scene from the Musical where I thought they were actually going to address the toxicity of their ‘relationship’ (at the end of the ‘Our Love is God’ musical number where Veronica seems to have a mental break down as she screams ‘Our Love is God’ over and over again as if to drown out the fact that she just assisted in the murder of two people), was brushed under the rug the next scene and seemingly forgotten about till something ELSE big happens and then it’s fucking Ground Hogs Day apparently.

Veronica in the movie joined the Heathers before the movie even began because she wanted to be popular and due to her skill in forgery is pretty much made their pet project. She’s not as much of a cunt as Chandler or Duke but she's still pretty fucking bad. She kills Kurt herself, blows off her actual best friend in exchange for shallow popularity, laughs over Heather Chandler dying and only turns on JD when the suicide note she writes for Heather Chandler backfires and causes people to glorify Chandler as a saint. This as well leads her to realize that it’s pointless to kill people because someone else just takes their place as “The Mythic Bitch” ala Heather Duke’s transformation (also because JD straight up slaps her in the face for trying to back out on him). She only ever does anything semi sweet at the VERY end after JD gets blown up. In the Musical she is portrayed as a sweet innocent little buttercup who is super besties with Martha and sticks up for the little guy and never meant to hurt anyone and was just dragged into everything bad by bad people. She feels constantly guilty for it and seems unable to make any actual choices herself outside of breaking into JD’s house to fuck him. She’s totally innocent guys. Totes.

And before you say “C’moooon it’s a fuckin’ Muscial!” you need to go watch you some Dear Evan Hansen or Les Miserables because those two Musicals are heavy as fuck and had no problem in showing how fucked up serious shit like war and suicide was through flawed characters.

Now with this new series coming out it seems destined to fail. It has only been releasing Instagram videos to promote the show and already it’s hitting all the same old PC points while being SO EDGY at the same time. It’s Riverdale all fucking over again.

“The terrible trio is more like a set of outcasts who have taken over Westerberg High School.” -EW article

Like really? Fuckin’ really? The Heathers were all popular girls due to their wealth (McNamara), beauty (Duke) and over all exuding of confidence and attitude backed up by all of the previously stated assets (Chandler). They weren’t a bunch of outcasts. They took pride in how they looked and how people saw them. I don’t understand this fucking need to make every kid nowadays an ‘outcast’ in an effort to make them ‘relatable’. They did it to every kid in the Power Rangers remake and MJ in Spider-Man: Homecoming and it’s starting to  get fucking annoying. Oh well, gotta get them kids with all that EDGE!

So let’s look at the ‘Heathers’ (I can’t bring myself to not put that in quotation marks when talking about these piles of hot garbage):

Heather Chandler is a plus-sized, Skrillex haired edge lord who looks like every Tumblr Feminist/Suicide Girls reject and literally gives off no aura of power or fear at all. She just comes off as some fat bitch who found the HAAS RadFem movement on Twitter and used it to fill herself with enough undeserved self importance to justify being a cunt to everyone. Yes, where the original Heather Chandler got her power and reputation through sheer intimidation and personality, this Heather Chandler looks like the type of girl who will physically assault you in the bathroom and threaten to sit on you till you die.

Gee golly, I see Heather Duke is a sassy gay male now (and a white one at that). Wow, it’s not like that hasn’t been done a billion fucking times. Funny that he’s a white dude whose character in the movie and play turns out to capitalize on Heather Chandler’s death to raise their own status to the ‘queen bitch’ of the school. That’ll do GREAT for gay stereotypes I’m sure.

Aaaaand Heather McNamara, our possibly Asian possibly Latinx butprobably just party bag of mixed race token character who is the literal punching bag of the group. At least that seems to have not changed but I am sure it’ll help add shallow sympathy since now it’s not a bunch of white kids beating up on a little white girl, it’s a bunch of white kids beating up on a little minority girl. Goodie goodie.

The rest:

JD literally gets nothing to show from his video except one speaking line where he is telling Veronica that she’s “Not like Heather Chandler” she’s “better” while quick cutting a bunch of random shots from the show that mostly seem pointless and just confusing with one flash of him apparently running the flat of a knife on his palm behind his back? So we get nothing from our poor, tortured sociopath. I can just hear the producers of this show now: “We can’t show him being too soft or the old fans might not watch it and can’t show him being a psychotic asshole or the Musical fans won’t watch it, so make it just as cluster fucking and confusing as possible so no one will ask questions and just be drawn in with all the cheap visual click bait!”

For Veronica we again get nothing. One line of “Dear Diary, I hate my friends but that doesn’t mean I want them DEAD!” followed by more random cuts of shots from the show, many of bloody scenes and hints of violence but a lot more of just weird confusing scenes that make no sense. It’s kind of funny for the sheer reason that they seem to be banking on people just already knowing who these characters are ala the original movie but at the same time are trying to pull in new audience members with all the vague quick cutting which they seem to have mistaken for ‘mystery’.

And last  but not least, we have Betty Finn. What’s that? “Who if Betty Finn?” all you fans of the Musical ask? Well you wouldn’t know who Betty is unless you watched the MOVIE cuz Betty is who Martha Dump Truck replaced in the Musical because Betty wasn’t fucking sad sacky enough and they didn’t want to clutter the script with such a minor character. Betty was smart and an actual good person, the only good person in the movie honestly, who was Veronica’s friend since they were in diapers. She didn’t have a huge part in the movie outside of providing some blackmail material for JD to use against Heather Duke and trying to get Veronica to stop being such a moron (which failed). Now she’s appears to be the stereotypical side character that will be prominent in the show, probably as a comic relief character or plot device to be used against Veronica at some point.

Now, there is a huge question you have to ask:

Where is Martha? Will Martha even be in the series? Alright, it’s two questions but you get the point.

I have two guesses;

1. Possibly

but more than likely

2. No. Absolutely not.

Why do you ask? Because Martha’s character served as a plot device in both the Movie and the Musical to show how awful the Heathers really were and how their bullying was actually dangerous. Martha was a fat, slow, ugly dump of a girl. Problem is, you can’t make fun of that anymore. It’s not ‘progressive’ to make fun of people with those flaws. As well it wouldn’t make sense, Heather Chandler is fat in this remake. Unless they’re going to go full retard with some kind of ‘internalized fatphobia’ shit it wouldn’t make sense to make fun of Martha for that. Heather McNamara is the stereotypical ditzy airhead which doesn’t seem to have changed in this remake so to make fun of someone being ‘slow’ while laughing at an Air-Head-of-Color would just be super duper mean!

If they DO put Martha in, she will either have to still be dumpy, slow and fat and end up being the most popular character in the end for ‘not giving into societies beauty standards’ or some shit, OR she will have to actually flat out die from her suicide attempt to push the EDGE and drive plot.

Either way this whole thing is going to be a train wreck that will either take off at the idiotic rate in which Teen Wolf and Riverdale did or be an utter failure.

I seriously hope for the latter. Sorry this is so long and there are probably some spelling and grammar errors. It’s literally 2:30 in the morning and the Monster I drank is starting to ware off so I’m running on fumes.

[allwehaveislcve-archived]

BOEX FOR THE SHIP MEME

Ships!!! || Meme

General:

Rate the Ship -  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - Forever, duh.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - It was literally love at first, my dudes.

How was their first kiss? - Um, to be honest it probably wasn’t super sweet and cutesy, considering it would’ve happened while they were sneaking around behind Erica’s back…. But i’m 100% certain that sparks most certainly flew.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - I’m gonna say Boq. 

Who is the best man/men? - Um, well Yero and probably Boq’s uncles (Henry & Roland), to be honest. He’s really close with both of them.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Well I would assume Elphie, Glinda & Nova. And probably Boq’s other cousin Laney, to be honest. Laney���s little sister, Tessa would totes be the flower girl though.

Who did the most planning? - Probably actually, Riley to be honest. She would so very much want to be the one the plan it. And she’d probably have help from Regina, and I wanna say Nova?

Who stressed the most? - I feel like they would both stress an equal amount over different things.

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Hahahahaha, Erica. I mean that was quite literally my first thought as soon as i read this question.

Sex:

Who is on top? - I think they may switch it up, but I think Boq would be more. 

Who is the one to instigate things? - Er… both? I think?

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - I don’t know…

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - Of course.

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - Um… maybe like 2-4?

How many children will they adopt? - idk if they would adopt or have naturally or both so  I’m just gonna say 2-4 for this one too

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - I feel like they’d split it evenly, honestly.

Who is the stricter parent? - Hm… Maybe Bex? Boq would be kind of a pushover, to be honest. It would be hard for him to actually be strict.

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - I would hope both of them.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - I feel like they’d split this evenly too.

Who is the more loved parent? - Well, I would hope that they’re loved equally.

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - Hm, I think they’d attend them together.

Who cried the most at graduation? - Boq, honestly. He gets it from Riley.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Again, I would hope both of them.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - Bex. Boq IS NOT allowed to cook.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Well, Boq isn’t going to be picky since he knows that Bex is doing all the cooking and since Bex is the one cooking, they don’t really gotta be picky? So… neither?

Who does the grocery shopping? - Boq, since he’d probably offer to since he’s not the one cooking.

How often do they bake desserts? - Hm, I don’t know. That’s up to Bex, haha.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - This is a weird question to ask for a couple. I really don’t know how to answer this…

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Boq. As long as he’s not the one cooking it.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Boq, since again, he can’t cook.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - BOQ!!!!! i mean just ask Riley about this.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - They’d probably take turns.

Who is really against chores? - I don’t think either really mind them, as they probably split the work up evenly.

Who cleans up after the pets? - Boq would probably offer to since he’s used to doing it.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - I would hope that neither of them are that lazy.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Hm, considering the only guests they ever have are probably friends or family, I don’t think they would stress too much.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Um… I don’t know?

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - I feel like they shower together, honestly.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - I think they would walk them/it together.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Probably every holiday, every year. I feel like Boq somewhat inherited Riley’s love for the holidays, but probably not as intensely as her.

What are their goals for the relationship? - To be happy and to love each other, and to last forever. To always be there for each other, to help each other through all the hard times.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Probably Boq to be honest. With the way the hours he sleeps at night fluctuates. 

Who plays the most pranks? - Hm…. I don’t really know. Maybe their children?

[awaysgofunny]

So far everything is so manageable. Totes manageable. And the funniest. Today is really good too probably because I slept so well last night. Just sleep, all I gotta do is make sure to sleep and it’s going to be just fine. 

New Rules need to be set, because I totally got this, and I like this new way and can definitely ride this out moving forward. Literally I am prepped for anything because my imagination (I’ll call it that even though technically it’s termed “delusions” lolololololololol) has already thought of something even more outlandish than the reality of it. 

Rule 1: When it gets TOOOO much like you’re on the out of control spin, sleep. Just sleep. I can’t get to where I can’t process incoming info. You have to still be able to at least act normal. Are people buying it? Am I starting to look crazy or am I still pulling it off that I am normal? Maybe remember to brush your fucking hair and at LEAST put on mascara, you’re blonde, god damn. Seriously this is key. Hygiene is an indicator. Keep yourself put together. ALWAYS. This week was a little rough, let’s get it back together. Blame it on the shower if ANYONE makes a comment (they won’t). 

Rule 2: Just ride it out. People are going to say some WEIRD SHIT. You will see/hear/smell some WEIRD SHIT. That’s OK. It’s so hard when to acknowledge it and when to react and when to absolutely ignore it. You can’t go fucking catatonic NO emotion, so find that happy medium, I guess? You cannot isolate because then people will know something is wrong. You cannot react to everything because then people will know something is wrong. You cannot react inappropriately because then people will know something is wrong. Remember how to act from before and just do that. I’ve been a little too un-reacty, maybe step it up a little? I need to figure that out. 

Rule 3: Basically the whole objective here is to make fucking sure that no one catches on that you are FUCKING LOSING IT FOR REAL again. Because you got this. You totally got this, it is completely OK. It does not have to end in disaster and you do not have to completely lose control of your experience. Actually you do, I guess it’s a shift in consciousness (eye roll)? It’s just shifting from blinders on and oblivious to everything to suddenly being aware? Actually I don’t know what the fuck is truly happening nor how to verbalize it, but the rule here is to just fucking do whatever you need to do to keep people from hassling you. You can NOT handle people in your face or hassling you. The emotions are hard though. Also the fact that people are REALLY starting to act fucking so so weird is 1000% all you and not them, just remember that. 

Rule 4: Don’t bail. Don’t run away. Some people have the suicide thing. Your thing is complete and utter detachment and a need to flee. This one is very hard to fight. To completely just want to break free and disappear is soooooooooooo eye-rollingly emo. Don’t do that. You are an adult. 

Rule 5: I just Googled “Schizophrenia relapse symptoms” and came up with “Common warning signs of a schizophrenia relapse include insomnia, social withdrawal, difficulty concentrating, irritability, loss of interest, increasing paranoia, and hallucinations.” So whoa it is TIME TO BUCKLE UP. HOWEVER all I have to do is NOT show those things. Just because you are experiencing something does not mean that anyone else needs to be privy to it. I am not having the delusion where I think people can read my mind or thoughts. You have to ALLOW someone that by YOUR OWN output which you yourself have control over. POKERFACE. It’s so hard. Do it though or you are going to be fucked, lol. At least pokerface about these goddamn symptoms. At least I’m not irritable. I actually could not be more chill, which is super fucking nice.

Rule 6: ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT EVERYONE ELSE HAS REAL, ACTUAL FUCKING SERIOUS PROBLEMS YOU WHINEY, ENTITLED, FUCKING BITCH. I mean you can take a moment and acknowledge that your brain is fucking you pretty hard, but like boo hoo you have a pretty god damn near-perfect life. SERIOUSLY. You have somehow managed to build this pretty cute little life where you can just fucking do whatever you want, whenever you want, with little consequences because even though it’s a little fried you still have a very good head on your shoulders. You have no REAL responsibilities. If you literally had the rug pulled out from underneath you tomorrow, seriously, fuck it! Been there. Just dust off and you’re fine. Literally, I’m not honestly sure how I’ve managed to make it to this age with NO responsibility but it is THE. BEST. But is that bad? I don’t know. 

Rule 7: I don’t know. And that’s ok. Continue to not assume. EVERYONE else assumes. And it’s SO ENTERTAINING to watch them make those assumptions. You are the only one who truly knows what is true for YOU and that’s all you can ever really know. Everything else is a fucking whirlwind of uncertainty and confusion and a little terror but hopefully comedy but it’s gonna be OK. 

[bwicblog]

AM: Greetings all babes on this fresh night ~ hopefully AWAKE unless you stayed up all day then honestly those bags you must be toting. Awful. I'm so sad for that and you but did you know there's this new startup eye depuffer? It's amazing. Frozen cucumber water with fresh tea leaves on your face AMAZING. leaves it fresh looking as if you'd actually slept. But anyway I see truck talk. Is it travel to somewhere good babe?

IA: I see every-one is having an adventur-ous m-orning

ID: oh hey it's my new punching bag.

VC: What

ID: i'm stuck in the truck because we need to pick up pris so i can go fight ashy.

AM: otherway around honey. Don't get so confused you haven't even gotten a concussion via MOI yet. AM: ADVENTUROUS. good word honey. Accurate I guess

VC: Hadean what

VC: What's this wordy thing and who's Ashy

IA: Y-ou're still planning -on fighting s-ome-one?

AM: aw cute. You're coming in such a humble manner--- it's Ashley by the way Hadsy babe.

ID: i'm planning on fighting ash. am. loudmouth there.

VC: Oh

ID: gonna humbly drive his cartilage nub in to his thinkpan.

VC: Hahahaha

VC: Good luck

AM: hold on Honeys my subs at my stop I'll be right back babes don't start the chatter without me~

VC: I mean that sincerrrely

IA: .... Y-ou sure y-ou're g-oing t-o be -okay?

VC: Please

VC: I imagine Hadean will be fine

ID: totes fine. don't worry about it. it's just gonna be a good ol fashion purpleblood beating.

VC: What, with yourrr fists? Please tell me you'rre going to use yourr psi, orr something.

AA: whaaasy is this the dude

VC: Purrples arren't frragile.

ID: that's the dude. don't worry about it vc, just know he's gonna get broken. also wtf sip if you crash i'm gonna be hella pissed. i'm gonna start elbowing you if you keep typing.

AA: mean!!

ID: so is texting when you're supposed to be driving. either pull over to write or get elbowed.

IA: Are y-ou talking t-o each -other in chat when y-ou're right next t-o each -other?

ID: you got it.

VC: pfft

IA: I supp-ose that's a way t-o c-onmunicate

ID: sips listens better to text than actual words. and probably listens even better to elbows.

IA: N-ot a safe -one, but it is -o e.

AM: You should listen to your friends gassy babe. I'm getting a little offended you think this is going to be so easy! If you don't take it seriously I really don't think I could take you out for closure coffee after babe. It's real rude to underestimate things, like here I am getting myself prepped in advance and such. Just. UHG. AM: I should be surprised though. Evidenced by these honies here and that you ignored your side kick the other night It makes sense. Kudos for boldness babe. Truly. Know when someone's not taking your bluffs though!

ID: i'm going to pris' place to get prepared, is that enough flattery for your overblown ego?

VC: Oh my god.

ID: i'm even getting an outfit that probably costs more than everything i've ever owned combined.

VC: We did it, we found the most stereotypical purpleblood

AM: You're bringing a suit right babe?

AM: stereotypical....

SA: Pris is alive. And I see this asshole is back 😊

ID: ahahah vc, he isn't. he's a paper pusher. there's nothing purpleblooded about him really.

VC: Wow.

VC: That's actually kind of sad.

VC: Poorr guy.

AM: babes please. The hostility in here is not making for a good vibe! I came in here giddy! My coffee wasn't messed up, the sub was on time i got extra crunches in this morning. Let bygones be bygones for a second Prisma sweetheart. Yeesh

VC: No, no, I just feel sorrry forr you now.

AM: Nothing wrong with a stable job babe.

VC: It's weirrrd but I'm embrracing it.

ID: =:) look ashy, i got you some pity.

AM: secretary to legislacerators is a sweet gig honey

ID: doesn't it warm your blood pusher?

VC: Oh god, not like _that_ , but yes

VC: PFfft

VC: You worrk forr _teals_?

ID: well of course platonic pity.

SA: how are they bygones... this is an active situATION ONE MOMENT

VC: whew

ID: yep.

ID: ....be careful pris.

AM: I work for Halvea babe.

VC: I have _no_ idea who that is.

VC: Somehow I doubt I carre.

AM: not a very average real is all I have today honey

ID: ij on here if you're ever dealt with them vc.

ID: ij said he was cheap labor.

AM: NOT

VC: Ahahah oh dearr

ID: so i mean. he's a bargain paper pusher.

VC: I hope he's not a clown, forrr his sake

AM: she's a kidder. A riot really babe. It's fun. All okay. You wouldn't understand office jokes don't worry

AM. Clown...?

ID: ij didn't seem the kidding type~

AM: I take my job serious honey. I'm no clown

VC: ...I meant a Mirrthful, silly trroll

VC: What

VC: Don't you know shorrthand?

AM: Not if it's not relevant to my life sweetheart. I get you now though. Don't worry babe no. No....mirthful swindling here. Not all fresh and boring though I promise though! Hell honey I've got to keep Hadsy entertained somehow if I don't dabble in that freak cult I need a schtick right? AM: Which I have. Honey have you heard of a trump card?

ID: yeah you were talking about that last time ashy.

ID: repeating yourself isn't entertaining.

AM: it's for the new one babe.

AM: keep up.

ID: oh so you're just polishing your ego on vc i see.

AM: Sweetheart you keep saying I have an ego but listen...listen are you listening?

ID: is this you taking out frustration from all the simpering to tealbloods i assume you must do?

VC: Well, at least you'rre not a clown, though admittedly the last cirrcus I went to wasn't bad.

VC: Strrange, but not that bad.

AM: Listen babe please. Jeez. I'm saying here...I'm saying Hadsy Honey. I've got manners and I wanted this VC here to know a bit about me and I can't have them thinking I'm covered in pore clogging face paint. Okay?

AM: So chill out rougey.

ID: you just clog your pores with. cucumber slime instead.

ID: i don't know if that's better.

AM: actually it does an amazing job of exfoliating if you use some almond and rice scrub after!

AM: a really refreshing deep clean

VC: Considerr me educated. And pfft. It is. Cucumberr slime might be excessive, but it's not paint.

VC: Especially considerring how garrish some paint designs arre.

ID: sorry, i hatched with perfect skin and don't have to worry about slime and scrubs.

AM: VC I like how you think. Keep going about that. You obviously know more since I don't get involved. I've got appointments to keep and all babe. Too busy to check out those meetings they give me pamphlets for.

AM: speaking of i don't think any of them know what a copywriter is? Honey listen...do yourself a favor if you ever start a cult for your caste hire one. As a graphic designer Goes a long way or appeal babe

AM: Hadsy...I'll bring you a face mask before we fight okay? I don't need you flaking layers of dead skin around.

AM: babe listen. You can be honest about your inability to afford these things. Being charitable and kind is important to me. Really babe. I know you didn't want my chips before and your trim as ever but. Babe. Take it really.

ID: boy are you gonna be surprised when you see my mug.

AM: You haven't seen me either honey.

ID: don't worry, my expectations are low so you won't have to worry about dashing them~

AM: exciting! Almost as exciting as these faxes I need to coffee. See you babe!! Be sure to shower and let a good moisturizer soak after you apply a water activated body scrub.

AM: *need to send AM: remembered I need to get Halveas coffee

AM: AU REVOIR HONEY

ID: i mean that shit probably isn't good for tattoos.

VC: ...I don't _know_ much about it, that's highblood business. I went to a cirrcus, that's all. Marroons don't _do_ cults, thankfully.

ID: try not to dump coffee in to the machine you inept idiot~

SA: ow 😦

ID: you okay pris? =:(

SA has sent IMG_055.png. It is a photo of him, a large gash going horizontally across his cheek.

ID: =:!!!! don't take selfies, go patch that up!

SA: I am pressing my sleeve to it while I move.

SA: it was another psion.

SA: they're out, now.

ID: they better be. =:( that might need some stitches or something.

SA: it's alright. I think. It just stings a lot.

SA: this is my first accident in a while.

ID: yeah, well. you can't be untouchable all the time unfortunately. i'm glad you're okay.

AA: n, that deffo needs stitches. and beforne anyone else fusses, am parnked and getting food, stfu.

ID: oh. okay listen to sips, get some stitches. or that. glue you can use on flesh. would that work?

AA: lmao, y, mb. as long as it's not supernglue. yrn mug bleeds lots, you can't just have shit staying open.

ID: so yeah, listen to sips and. get that to stop bleeding. =>:(

AA: orn leave it open and get a hot scarn. AA: evernybody digs scarns. >:}

ID: i mean scars make everyone look cooler. it's true.

IA: Are y-ou still driving?

AA: y, ofc.

AA: this is not a taxi sernvice, tho, you gotta have horns at least thrnee hands high to get frnee rnides.

AA: I'd take a pic to show, but, like, you can't drnive w yrn knees.

AA: that's dangernous. >:}

SA: I like my face and body mostly scarless

SA: I will return

SA: fixed.

SA: now I am beautiful again

ID: again? =:P

AA: yrn so vain, dude. >:}

ID: gonna make the scratching post- i mean sips- feel self conscious here! 💚

AA: stfu, i am the prnettiest bella at this goddamn ball. look at this face, dude, it's got like, charnactern. and chicks dig scarns. >:P

ID: if it makes you feel better, i agree that scars are badass.

ID: it's a. 'look what happened to me and i survived it' thing.

AA: y, exactly. if you don't have any scarns, how the fuck is anybody supposed to buy the fact you know wtf yrn doing?

AA: it's yrn prnoof yrn not some dumb-ass posern.

ID: i'm clearly the exception. of course.

ID: though one of these nights you should tell me scar-stories sips. =:P i wanna hear fight stories.

AA: ofc, ofc. nobody expects sparnkplugs to get theirn frnonds dirnty. >:P

AA: i'll tell you one rnight now, nerndlornd. AA: name a spot. orn a caste!

ID: hmmmm!

ID: the neck one.

SA: I can appreciate scars on others but I don't like them on me. They look too rugged. And that is not my "aesthetic"

AA: oh? that one's laaaame.

ID: well if you change your mind just know you could pull off rugged well. =:P

AA: y. eat a steak and yrn totally passable. >:}

SA: scar stories? Tell us

SA: and thank you 💚

ID: speaking of, you better have eaten today. =>:(

AA: thrnoat scarn was frnom my firnst fight! didn't know how to brneak a garnrnote prnopern yet, but luckily, she didn't know how to use it, eithern. >:}

AA: and then my ashmate said it'd look wicked sweet if it scarnrned morne, so we rnoughed it up a little forn show. AA: phern's stitches arne way bettern now, tho.

ID: go big or go hive on your first scar, gg.

SA: i will have a milkshake. That's food

SA: oh, goodness.

ID: ...at least it has a lot of calories. add some protein powder to it if you have some though.

SA: you made more scars just to look good?

SA: 😰🤕

AA: it is nooot. at least get some frnies!!

SA: it hurts to open mouth

ID: wriggler. =:P

ID: 💚

AA: and y, when i was a dumb bb. AA: needed to look rnough so ppl would stop fucking W me. >:}

SA: i can be pathetic too

SA: 💚

ID: rude we're never pathetic over here.

AA: aww, poorn pupa. AA: grind up the frnies in yrn milkshake, duh. 💚

SA: I suppose that's a good reason, Sipara

ID: ...eww.

SA: of it works it works

SA: that sounds horrible

AA: n, what's hornrnid is tuna and peanut mash shakes, so be glad i ain't telling you to drnink those.

AA: >:P

ID: what. ewww.

ID: how about your lip scars sip?

SA: did... you actually drink those

AA: it helps you gain muscle. so. y. >:}

AA: and why arne you wanting to know abt my face scarns? those arne lame. supern lame. hella lame.

ID: grossss.

ID: because they're the ones i see the most other than the neck one. and i already asked about that.

SA: what's the worst scar you have, Sipara.

AA: gdi, yrn both the wornst. >:P

SA: do you know what is immensely annoying

SA: neighbors

RS: / oh / what are they doing / ? /

RS: / or / is this an issue of existence / ? / haha /

SA: I think they are arguing.

SA: it woke me up from rest.

SA: and now my heard hurts.

SA: why is it so hard to solve problems civilly

RS: / oh / ! / I'm sorry / that's dreadful / can you get some tea / ? / that can help your head / RS: / some people are incapable of behaving in a manner that befits their sweeps / they'd rather holler like wrigglers / RS: / can you / mm / politely tap the wall / to let them know you can hear the debate / ? / perhaps it will shame them into silence / ! /

SA: mmm...

SA: Maybe, but I think all I have is black tea.

SA: it's unfortunate and i frown upon those who insist on acting like. children.

SA: If I could convince myself to move from my bed I might do that but I rather can't.

RS: / =:C! / RS: / who knows / ? / caffeine might help / but ah / perhaps not / if you don't feel like getting up / RS: / I can't precisely blame you / I fell asleep earlier / and just woke / and / moving seems rather more effort than it's worth /

SA: i thought that caffeine made headaches worse? But I am unsure...

SA: we can lie uselessly in bed together.

SA: it seems like the day for it. It's been raining all evening in Provenance.

RS: / it is fifty fifty / i drink sufficient amounts that i get panaches if i do not have any caffeine on hand / so it works for me / RS: / and / haha / marvelous / ! / the highest form of bonding / lying bonelessly in a bed / simulantaenously as your peers / RS: / it is raining here too / ! / it is damp and cold and i loathe it / how do you stand it / ? /

SA: Oh... I suppose that could cause it then. I do drink coffee-based drinks regularly.

SA: absolutely. I can think of no better experience.

SA: I enjoy the rain. I also love thunder.

SA: My loft is high enough that I can see lightning over the city and the port, and it's very beautiful.

SA; but I would rather be inside than in the rain. Listening.

RS: / haha / I don't like either of them / but / if you're up high / I suppose that makes the difference / RS: / do your psionics relate to the weather / ? /

RS: / / / ah / no / that's an impolite assumption to make / my apologies / ! /

SA: no, they are just clairvoyance.

SA: it didn't seem like a bad assumption. It was better than usual

ID: ...so, uh. pretty dead night here, huh.

SA: very. I wonder what happened

ID: no clue. maybe they just all spontaneously grew lives.

SA: oh, damn.

SA: now ill never convince them to come back.

SA: I suppose I will just have to commit harder to my videogames

ID: pfff. =:P did the pokemon-me evolve.

AA: dnw, dnw, we will have L I F E in herne. latern. eventually. mb. AA: have you two evern playned nevren have i evern btw.

ID: =:??? what's that.

AA: played!! therne is no rn therne. >:P idgaf if you've evern playerned it.

AA: it's a gaaaaaaaame, duh.

ID: ...how do you play?

SA: yes, it did. I also fed it treats.

SA: never have I ever?

SA: five fingers is what I heard it called in a bar once

ID: =:?????

ID: what happens to the fingers.

ID: do you chop them off.

SA: :)c

SA: no, you don't thankfully.

AA: 'kay, you say, like. AA: .. idk, nevern have i evern culled a man, and then evernybody around has to rnaise theirn hand if they, like, have done it. AA: orn, like, if you say it and you've done it, you gotta. AA: it's fuuun.

SA: sometimes you can use shots too

ID: oh. that sounds mostly harmless.

AA: nornmally ppl, like, take a shot when they say it. AA: but you two arne teetolling loser--

AA: oh my god, prnisma, way to be fucking scandalous. >:}

SS: (Omfg, I was bout to be like you're leavin out the best part!)

SA: how bad me be :)c

AA: oh my god, nevern use that smiley again, it's hornrnible.

AA: >:{

ID: is this all working up to asking the room to play.

SA: 😂

ID: because. yes.

SS: (Prisma's here to save your sitcushions tho Sipa)

SA: how will we verify though. There's no stakes

AA: lmfao, n, i would nevern ask the rnoom to play. AA: me and lal arne playing, b/c i bought booze, and he's got booze hid in his couch, so, like. AA: you two arne mornally rnequirned to suppornt me in my time of need and fucking play.

AA: turn on yrn webcams!!

AA: wait, no, fuck, lal doesn't got one. >:?

ID: okay. but remember my speakers don't work so type if you want me to actually answer.

AA: omg omg yessss.

SS: (I got a webcam!) SS: (It's in, uh, three pieces on my palmhusk.)

AA: if you just hung out in my hotel rnoom, you could totes use mine. >:P AA: but y, y, we will all type.

SS: (Say thx to the zeds, pal, they were real interested-like in what I tasted but unfort they just up and got the actually valuable ish.)

SA: I have a camera but I'm not showing my horrible face so you can see my hands and torso

SS: (And shit, pal, my b! Next time I'll totes up and get myself fired so I can use your cam.)

SS: (Maybe I'll set up a camgirl biz.)

SS: (Pri's secretly too pretty for mortal eyes txt it.)

ID: psh pris you saw my face looking a whole lot worse than a lil gash. =:P

SA: yes but you're handsome qualities are not weakened by scars

SA: I however look like a zombie with a tissue on my face

ID: aww hear that guys, i'm pretty even covered in gore.

AA: i meant haaaads. but y, pls get firned to come hang out w me. AA: you can totes be the field assistant to my docternrnornist. >:P

aA: also awww. way2flattern, prnii.

SS: (As I've totes established to Sipa earlier: )

SS: (Broken-face is the new chic.)

AA: why do you look

ID: and fiiine sips. i'll come over.

SA: I am a good flatterer

SA: I'm ready when you all are so let me know

SA: I will get. Malibou in the mean time

SS: (Mali-what, pal, it's straight vodka or bust!) SS: (Sunshine if you're a real troll.)

SS: (Ain't no drinkin unless you're, like, killin braincells and lowerin your life expectancy while you're at it.)

SS: (A lil blindness ain't never killed nobody!)

AA: pls get malibu and clean out yrn pan w/ it. AA: no zombie kinks in the chat rnoom, pls and tyvm. >:} forn starnterns, you totes don't wearn enough white to pull that shit off.

AA: and yyyyyyy. >:D rnoom parnty!!

ID: what's a malibou.

SS: (Tfw you're too broke to not get wasted sad and alone. (\unu/) ) SS: (This is what my life has become!)

SS: (Someone put on Trollvanescence plox.)

SA: what zombie kinks...

SS: (And y, only Pher gets to have the hots for the undead.)

SS: (Him, and that wader.)

SA: w

SA: what

ID: pheres and daz like those rainbowdrinker movies pris.

SA: oh.

AA: dnw, prni, dnw.

SA: horrid

AA: let it wash overn you like sunlight.

AA: therne, now we'rne all blind and past it. >:}

AA: arne you actually getting booze btw??

SA: yes

AA: do i have to orndern booze to kee -- !!

AA: !!!!!!!!

SS: (Aight so wait how're we playin this?) SS: (Like, showoff ver where you say a thing you've done and everyone what ain't done it takes a shot?) SS: (Or cluckbeast olympics where you say ish you ain't done and anybody what's done it's gotta take a shot?)

AA: wait, no, shit, i think i totes got some. AA: wherne the fuck did i put my bag. >:?

ID: oh malibou is booze.

SA turns on their webcam. There is a bottle of Bailey's and five shots of it on the coffee table. Of course you can only see his hands and knees because of how his computer is situated. Very serious about the face thing

SS: (Cos I gotta say I'm totes gonna win the latter, I lits grew up under a rock.)

SA: I don't actually have Malibou but

ID: i hope you ate dinner pris. =:P

SA: no 😃

SS: (Hi-5)

ID: let's do the version where lal doesn't immediately win.

SS: (We die of alcohol poisoning like trolls.)

SA: you should be more concerned about me

SA: I haven't done anything in my life

SS: (Nah, we're playin the ver where you up and lose if you ain't done jack!)

SS: (Ain't no fun otherwise.)

ID: ...okay the game where you don't both join hands and win by being boring. =:P

SS: (Nm I vote we team up and crush Hadean.)

SA: no I wouldn't betray Hadean even in useless games

SS: (Y, this is v srs bsns.)

ID: thanks pris. =:P really warming the blood pumper tonight.

SA; I do that every night

AA: omg, look what i found. >:D AA turns on her webcam and brandishes a bottle of cheap red wine at it, beaming. It has a ribbon on it. AA: also, omfg, no teaming up of any kind, 'kay.

AA: i'm going to crnush all of you and it's gotta be 4x1, or else it ain't cool. >:{

AA: ... 3v1. w/e, w/eeeeeeee.

ID: knock knock sips, let me on in.

AA: y! if pops lands on yrn head, dnw, he's frniendly.

ID: he's probably just infatuated with my horn.

SS: (Wtf, Sipa.)

AA: it's on firne, he's on firne, it's, llike, a pernf match.

SS: (Why you gotta betray me like this?)

SS: (Not the team ish, I mean the booze.)

ID: please don't let your lusus lay my horn down by the fire.

SS: (You can't take shots of wine.)

SS: (Leastways not if you ain't a lightweight. (\unu/) )

SS: ( / End transparent bid at manipulation.)

AA: if he keeps bugging you, i'll lock him in the closet. but it means he likes youuu. AA: and -- lmao, what'rne Y O U drninking, then??

SS: (...)

AA: strnaight coffee does not count as booze. >:P

SS: (I ain't actually got the foggiest wtf this is, negl.)

AA: even if it is gonna make yrn teeth fall out.

AA: take a swig and find out!!

SS: (Tastes like crap, tho!) (\^_^/) )

SS: (Fruity crap.)

SS: (.... I'm probs gonna get, like, a mold.)

SS: (The sacrifices I make for you. (\qnq/) )

AA: >:}

AA: okay, hows about, instead of taking a _shot_, i will just take a fucking chug. AA: to make it faaaaaairn. bc yrn whining.

ID: if it makes you feel better, sips' stuff is probably crap.

ID: i mean. it has a ribbon.

ID: that's cheap and tacky af.

SS: (It should probs be on record that I've, like, actually consumed units of alcohol, like.)

SS: (Twice.)

SS: (So I'm just here makin sure everyone gets as wasted as I'm bout to.)

SS: ( (\unu/) )

AA: stfuuu, it's not tacky, it's Q T.

SS: (Put the ribbon in your hair!)

SS: (Or around your horns, mb someone'll actually be able to see em that way!)

ID: ahahahah don't hold your breath.

SA: oh dear

AA: so someone'll be able to see 'em, orn so you'll be able to see 'em?? >:P AA: bc it'll need to be a biggern rnibbon forn that, dornk.

AA: and hads, i'm gonna lop off yrn horns and take 'em if you keep that shit up. AA: you've got thrnee. lrn2sharne.

ID: fight after you're both trashed, it'll be funnier that way.

SS: (Bigger ribbon and a microscope. (\unu/) )

AA: .. prni. prniiii. AA: you starnt this! and hads, wave hi forn the webcam. >:}

ID: sorry sips, you can have the third one if you can get it to stay.

SS: (Ain't my fault we up and need visual aids and a map to find 'em - you totes had your chance to steal mine.)

ID waves his better hand at the camera. Hey he's not looking as bad now, just in time to get beat up again.

SA: you want me to start?

AA: y!

SA: why...

AA: bc yrn the hearnt of ourn parnty.

AA: duuuuuuh.

ID: clearly.

SS: (^^^^^)

SA: mmm

SS: (Also I ain't doin it on accounta I ain't sure how hard peeps're goin and I'm only down to, like, alienate errybody with weird mother grub slurry experiences after a few more drinks.)

AA: well, it ain't you, hads. AA: and lal's like, only the hrnt, if we bought it off eprney.

AA: ... case in point, oh my god, this is why yrn not starnting.

SA: never have I ever

SS: (Why, you don't wanna hear bout where your buckets go???)

SA: WHAT

AA gags loudly and obnoxiously at the camera.

AA: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo AA: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo AA: stfu stfu stfu

SA wrings his hands on the camera

ID is making a face like someone just skinned a cat in front of him.

SS: (Protip: They go under a rock. Like, the kinda rock jadebloods up and grow up under. What, you think the mother grub shovels that ish into her carcass herself?)

SA: I'm glad I was in a tube

AA: N E V E RN H A V E I E V E R N AA: smooched a clown, how's that. AA AGGRESSIVELY TAKES A SWIG.

SS: (Wait, why're you drinkin??)

SA: what... you're not supposed to drink if you haven't done it

ID: sips is just way too down to booze.

AA: ... wait, fuck.

SS: (Do we gotta drink on our turn??)

AA: idk!!

SS: (Omfg)

AA: i thought you werne always drninking!!

SS: (Rules! If you ain't done it, you drink!)

SA: that's. Ass backwards

SS: (If it's your turn, you say a thing you've done!)

SS: (Y, Hads decided we're doing this ver earlier.)

ID: well that's what happens when half of us never do anything pris.

SA: it's if you haven't done it you don't drink if you have done it you drink

SA: that's

SA: my head hurts

ID: otherwise sips gets trashed while you two are sober.

AA: if we do it yrn way, prni, me and hadds arne gonna get sloshed and you and lal will be the winnerns.

SS: (And you were, like, nooo, we're not doing the normal ver cos I ain't gonna turncoat on my biffle!)

AA: that's cheaaaating.

SA: then what's the point of never have I ever...

SA: how do you phrase that

SS: (Showin off wicked ish you've done and making erryone drink for bein an inexperienced loser!)

ID: you're still admitting to doing or not doing something pris!

ID: anyways just drink if you haven't smooched a clown. =>:(

AA: wait, wait, haaads. AA: you still gotta drnink. go get a watern bottle orn something. >:P

AA: you arne P A RN T I C I P A T I N G.

SA: I haven't kissed anybody

AA: omg.

ID: =:'( i don't get to drink your rotten grape juice.

SA wants to die already. He just drinks his shot very confused

SS: (RIP sobriety!)

SS: (Clean for sweeps! And this is how it ends!)

SS: (Havin' good taste in peeps!)

AA: you wernen't gonna get to, but shit, if yrn gonna call it _rnotton grnape juice_, that's the sornt of apprneciation it desernves.

SA: if we keep getting off topic I'm just drinking mine

SA: 🤷‍♀️

SS: (And not mackin on clown-chasin palm trees. (\qnq/) )

AA: okay, okay, back on topic. >:} AA: hads, have you orn have you not macked on a clown.

SS: (Well, you're the one that up and ain't gone yet.)

ID: am i drinking sips?

ID: i was the only one aware of the rules!

AA: n, i am holding out the bottle bc i gotta strnetch my tendons.

SA: how do you not know...

SS: (You're drinkin if you ain't had the privilege of getting paint smeared on your facegash!)

AA: .. wait, shit, arne you drninking?

ID: i know the rules and i do not drink because i know how shitty face paint tastes.

ID: moving on, how do we figure out who goes next.

SA: me

SS: (Person what went can pick someone!)

AA: caste-orndern. prni goes next!

SA: my turn was stolen from me

AA: i didn't steal it, i saved all of us frnom bucket slurnrny stornies.

AA: now say something beforne lal steals it back!!

SS: (P sure caste order means Hads, but aye-aye.)

ID: curse my maroon blood, screwing me over again.

ID: nah, because sips started. so i gotta wait.

SA: this

SA: I don't know how to ask questions because my life is so linear

SS: (You ain't gotta ask a Q, just say some cool ish you've up and done that you think maybe one of us plebs ain't!)

SS: (Like, uh, takin two centuries to come up w an idea for a drinkin game. (\eue/) )

ID: but don't get too specific because that's cheating.

AA: y! say it, like, idk.

SA: exactly

AA: never have i ever beaten the shit out of a stranger in an alley.

SA: it's all very specific. My entire life is specific

SS: (Wtf, Sipa, shade thrown.)

AA: orn, wait, no, too specific. AA: nevern have i evern beaten _someone_ in an alley.

SS: (Never have I ever been beat up in an alley!!)

ID: you could do never have i ever known the loving touch of a lusus? =:???

AA: hads, noooo, that's deprnessing.

SA; oh

SA: never have I ever not taken out a member of every caste

SA: there

SA; beat that assholes

SS: (Wtffffffff)

AA: .. arne we drninking if we did orn didn't?

SS: (Drink if you ain't!)

ID: if we didn't.

SS: (Drink if you wanna, like, preserve my soul.)

AA: you two bettern get to chugging. >:}

SS: (Fuck yoouuuu, I ain't drinkin. (\eue/) )

ID: so hand over the grape juice because i haven't run in to a fuschia yet.

AA: >:D >:D

SS: (Ain't never said what age they gotta be, pal, and I got real clumsy stompin boots.)

AA: they'rne -- omfg, cheatern!!

SS: (Also, like, cullpit duty.)

SA: that doesn't count

SA; that required no effort on your part

SS: (You ain't never said it wouldn't! No takebacks.)

SS: (You didn't say 'never have I ever not put effort into takin out a troll of every caste,' pal!)

ID: everyone remember in the future that lal gets grub-murdering opportunities.

SS: (Read it and weep, I ain't takin a shot. (\unu/) )

AA: lmfao. y, okay, fairn.

SS: (Got, pal.)

ID: i was about to say or got.

AA: .. arne we planning on having grnub-murnderning opporntunities??

AA: bc they'rne grnoss and squishy.

SA: please no

SS: (Only if we get, like, really wasted.)

Sa: I rather like them

ID: i never try to forsee the future sips.

AA: eeeeeeew. at both of you. >:}

SS: (I like em, too! For eatin.)

AA: they'rne the wornst and yrn also the wornst.

SA; disgusting

AA: lal, it's yrn turn!!

SS: (!!)

AA: also, beeteedubs, fuschias arne rnly fucking lame.

AA: orn tyrnians or wtfevern you wanna call 'em.

ID: gee, didn't realize that already sips.

AA: just putting it out therne. >:P

ID: =:PPP

AA: idk, mb yrn a secrnet fish-lovern, hads. idk yrn fucking life.

SS: (Never have I ever got beat up in an alley by a rando wantin my cash and been rescued by a maroonblood with no shinin armor on accounta her sense a propriety's shit.)

AA: mb you got an emprne - lmfao.

ID: what did i say about specifics?

SA: that's too specific and cheating

SS: (I knoooow, omfg, I'm just messin on accounta Sipa's dumb alley thing.)

SS: (Never have I ever...)

SS: (Dumped a bucket of slurry over someone's head!)

AA: look, applaud my valiant sense of rnescue, 'kay. AA: that was my good deed forn, like, the entirne S W E E P.

SA:

AA: ...........

SA: I don't want to play this game anymore

HORRIBLE FACES.

ID: what? why not pris? =:???

SS: (And now see I'm, like, usually a real nice guy!)

AA: welp, i guess that's a guarnatee to make evernyone drnink.

AA: >:P

ID: just means we all get to drink because lal is a brat. =:P

just shifts around to lie down on the sofa, covering his face with the crook of his elbow omg.

SA: I'll just say if I have or haven't but not actually participate

SS: (The biggest brat, tyvm. (\unu/) )

Time for more gulps of the rotten grape juice that you think is mixed with gasoline.

AA: aww. is yrn head fucking w/ you? that's fiiine.

AA: .. also, wtf, lal. AA: lmaooo.

SS: (Ain't no sense in killin more pan cells if they're already up and puttin on a show.)

SS: (What??)

SA: no I just didn't want that image

ID: moving on from the mental image!

ID: never have i ever...

SS: (You punch people in the face, I do creative ish.)

AA: #b7410e AA: that's my chrnome. >:P

ID: since we're being brats...

SS: (lkjdfhg)

AA: since you apparnently don't even know it.

SS: (Soz, pal, left all my spectrometers in the caverns!)

ID: had a fish repeatedly jab a ink-tipped needle in to my eyelid for an hour.

AA: i thought we werne bosom buddies and you ain't even looked at mine. fucking rnude!!

AA: hads wtf.

SS: (Ain't had time to measure erryone's vein status upon meetin.)

SA: isn't that also very specific ...

AA: .. why would you get tattooed by a fish??

SS: (Who's up and bein specific-like now??)

ID: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

SA: also have but not the eyelid

AA: that's so specific, too, you cheatern!!

ID: because the fish is good and cheap.

AA: i got my earns tatted.

AA: does that mean i gotta take a half-sip??

SS: (Make it, like, face tattoos, or I shoulda been able to use my alley thing.)

ID: fiiine face tats.

ID: ...do ears count as face.

ID: i say no.

AA: .. also, omg, wtf you get ink, prni?

SS: (Also, wtf, am I the only one drinkin?) SS: (Y'all are punks and whippersnappers.)

SA: haven't

SA: I have a serial number tattooed behind my ear

AA: oh. oops. >:P

SA; and my lab number

SS: (Oh, shit, wait, we doin ears?)

SS: (Twinsies!!)

ID: ....ears don't count as face.

SS: (Fuck)

SS: (Still twinsies tho!)

ID: look sips, they're bonding.

SS: (Why'd you get yours behind the auricular??)

AA snatches the bottle from Hadean and pointedly takes a swig. AA: bluh. this tastes kind of -- !!

AA: omg awwwww. >:}

SA: what? Who?

AA: ... lab numbern? >:?

SA: behind what?

ID: does all wine taste like something we could put in the tank of the cart.

SS: (The thing that up and receives sound waves on the side a your head.)

SS: (Also: I think if I drink too much of this ish I might actually die!) SS: (Not, like, from alcohol poisoning, just on accounta it's awful.)

SA: I don't know. They wanted it there. If you look closely you can see it.

SA: my other is on my shoulder

SA; but if you see it it can be tracked to my program

SA: so you aren't allowed to see

SA: sorry

ID: sips, go so we can watch lal wither away from his drink.

SS: (LUL)

ID: before we die from this shit we're drinking.

SS: (Trust me, pal, there ain't no prob on that front.)

SA: why do you have tattoos?

SS: (The seein thing, and also the twinsies thing I guess cos I only got one so we're losin that pissing contest.)

SA; ah

SS: (Ain't like you're on cam anyhow.)

SA: who isn't?

AA: y/y, rnight. AA: nevern have i evern... uh. uhhh.

SS: (Well, your face ain't!)

SA: oh

SS: (Not proper-like anyhow.)

AA: culled someone. how's that? >:P

ID: pris is shy because he refuses to believe scars can make a mug handsome.

SS: (And I've got tats cos I'm up and fashionable, like, obvi. Ain't nothin like a 1101 on the auricular, it's the new barcode tat.)

ID: ...culled a troll make it.

SA: not mine

ID: grubs don't count.

SA: new barcode tat ...

AA: fiiiiiine. culled a trnoll!

SS: (Still ain't drinkin! (\tumut/) )

SA; have

ID: i don't think anyone drinks? pris you cull someone?

AA: oh, gdi, that was the wornst q. i forngot yrn all, like, awful lowbies.

AA: do i get to do a do-overn??

SS: (LUL)

ID: no.

SS: (Y)

SA: of course I gave

AA: gdi.

SA; was that not an assumed thing

ID: sips needs to learn from her mistakes.

ID: her stupid, stupid mistakes. =:P

SA; thought saying I'd taken out a member of every caste assumed that

AA: i was assuming yrn, like, gently petting them in the alleys and putting 'em to sleep, tbh.

AA: mb you took them out forn dinnern!

SA: no I was raised to kill people

SA: 👍

SS: (LOL)

ID: get wrekt.

SA: I avoid it if. I Can.

ID: your turn pris!

SA: I can't, I'm not drinking

AA: you can still give a q, doof.

SA: bleh

SS: (What's drinkin gotta do with if you're gonna up and be dreamin about slurry buckets, anyhow?)

flails his hand a bit

AA: if you don't want yrn turn, i'll take it. >:} >:} >:}

flips off the camera tbh

ID: just do one about being rich pris.

AA: lmfao, that isn't a q!!

SA; never have I ever not been sterile

SA; asshole

SS: (Fuk)

AA: why do you keep taking it back to buckets? AA: you two arne the wornst.

SA; he started it

SA; I finished it

SWIG. And then she shoves the bottle at Hadean.

SS: (Ain't no reason to put me on front street like that!)

CHUG CHUG CHUG.

ID: how does it get worse instead of better?

AA: to punish us.

ID: =:'(

AA: forn ourn mistakes and sins. AA: lal, bc yrn too lame 2, like, waste yrn tips and buy a webcam forn B O N D I N G.

AA: you can just say swig. >:P

SS: (Pass on the drink.) SS: ( (\tumut/) ) SS: (See, I can totes do personal tmi, too!)

ID: ...sips it's still turning in to us drinking more than them.

AA: .. oh, gdi.

SA Laughs holy shit he sounds so pleased

SS: (Mb you just ain't visited the labrat arcade enough, pal. (\ouo/) )

SS: (Wtf I think he broke.)

AA: new goal: we'rne gonna make them drnink beforne we die of this shit.

ID: i'm gonna punch you when we get there pris. =>:P

ID: deal.

SA: only on the shoulder

ID: of course in the shoulder. or the arm.

AA: y. no brnawling until aftern the fight.

ID: of course! =:P

AA: and then prni's gotta fight me firnst, b/c he said he would and H A S N ' T.

SA: what if I'm tired that night

AA: lal, yrn turn. and then you can, like, dd on wtf you mean by labrnat. >:} AA: idt yrn squeaky enough to be a rnat.

ID: sips you just need to challenge more strangers on the internet.

AA: .. then we can _half-fight??_

SA: mmm

SS: (You can pry deets outta my cold, dead fronds! (\ouo/) ) SS: (No, okay, omfg, we gotta up and up the ante, now.) SS: (Pri totes started this pissin contest, bee tee dubs, so pls direct all complaints thaaataway.) SS: (Anywho: Never have I ever wondered where tf my kidney is apart from knowin it ain't inside my carcass no more.)

AA: haaaaaaaads. that's the diff b/w me and you, 'kay. AA: when i fight strnagerns off the internet, i'm getting fucking paid forn it.

AA: frnee fights arne forn frniends only. >:}

SS: (Pls tell me you ain't that kinda labrat, Pri, I'm countin on you here.)

SA: what? You started it? Everyone saw it????

SS: (I ain't seen ish. (\eue/) )

ID: i still think i should have won something for a tie.

SA: what kind of lab rat?

AA: was that a tie??

SA; what?

AA: >:P

ID: neither of us could fight, that counts as a tie. =>:P

SS: (Technical-like, bee tee dubs, my theme is mammalian squeakbeast, so it's kinda a squeakbeast??)

AA: nnn. that counts as evernybody in the audience's pissed b/c you done fucked up theirn bets.

AA: >:}

ID: yeah i noticed that.

SS: (See, this is why I ain't the bettin type.)

SS: (P sure there's peeps what up and figured you, like, staged that ish.)

ID: or that i was a cheater. got plenty of cheater taunts!

AA: also, y, i am taking a swig, b/c i've both of my poison-prnocessing bladderns, you fuckern.

SS: ( (\eue/) )

ID: i'm pretty sure mine are still in there. or at least most of them.

AA: wtf even happened therne, anyway? bc ngl, if you wernen't, like, mostly dead, i'd totes assume you werne cheating, too.

AA: .. oh shit, is it my turn again? >:D

SS: (Y!)

AA: !!!!!!!!!!!

ID: duh sips, i pushed my psi a lil too much.

ID: didn't you notice the amount i was pushing around there? =:P

AA: nevern have i evern.. pitch-kissed someone, since ernrnybody's _cheating_. >:P

AA: and. huh. i thought yrn limits would be way highern that.

SA: I already pass this one because I said earlier I've never kissed

SS: (!!!!!)

SS: (Wtf, you're just jelly I'm up and winnin)

AA: y, srny, prni. i had to establish dominance by, like, showing off how much of nernds all thrnee of you arne.

ID: ...yeah, well. there were outside forces at work okay. we'll leave it at that!

SS: (Also that I've got better tastes'n clowns. (\unu/) )

ID: ...what you don't think i haven't pitch-kissed.

AA: y, that is why i am holding out the bottle.

SS: (Pal, I'm p sure a guy what picks fights w peeps what're wrong on the internet)

ID: you're gonna get the bottle up your chute. =>:P

SS: (Ain't gonna be the one takin a swig.)

ID: i mean. what do you think happened to my face the last time you had to patch my carcass up sip?

SS: (A cholerbear?)

ID: i did not, in fact, stick my face in a blender.

stares at hands hands for a second before rolling over this mother fucker went to sleep

ID: ...aww man we broke pris.

SS: (Mb he's just a lightweight after that first one?)

ID: probably. since i doubt he ate before this.

SS: (He woulda had to drink for the kidney but ain't no sayin ish bout the liver.)

AA: .. whaaaaaaat.

AA: i didn't rnealise that was, like, _pitch pitch??_ lmfao, dude, get bettern taste. >:P AA: but that's also biting, you bulgemunch, get w/ it.

AA: so if that's yrn claim to fame, take a swig!!

SS: (Join us in the hall of nerd-dom.)

SS: (We'll stage an uprising gainst Sipa!)

ID: you didn't say it had to be serious pitch. and it definitely wasn't the first troll my lips have touched.

ID: i wasn't smooching the clown from before from pity.

AA: n, fuck off, yrn not allowed. settle down, losern, orn i'll pernsonally rnemove you frnom the rnanks. >:P

AA: ... idk, man, mb you werne. i'd only judge, like.

AA: a little!

AA: a smidge.

AA: a piiiiiinch. >:}

ID: =>:(

AA: fiiiine. no drniking frnom you. gdi.

SS: (RIP Hads's developin alcoholism. (\qnq/) )

AA: why am i drninking to evernything. D:< AA: since prni's ignorning us (crnuelly), lal, it's yrn turn. AA: and you gotta, like, do something N O RN M A L, orn i'll box yrn flaps.

ID: yeahhh lal.

SA: I am not

SS: (Wtf, I ain't listed nothin abnormal-like! Leastways not if you're meeeee. (\unu/) Ain't my fault you're plebs!)

SA: I am just comfortable

SA: and tired

ID: well if you gotta bow out, it's fine pris.

AA: y. if you wanna sleep, np, np.

SA: I will be here until I sleep

ID: ...can booze make you sleepy. maybe that's what's happening.

SA; just hang up on me

SS: (Y!)

SA: if it's weird

SS: (But if he's awake, then I ain't gonna be the guy to steal his Q!)

SA: it wasn't that much...

SA: steal it

SS: (V generous!)

AA: booze can make you sleep, y.

SS: (Never have I ever not fallen asleep durin a game of never how I ever!)

SA: I'm still awake

SA: also go fuck yourself

SS: (You are now, omfg.)

yawns like a petulant baby omg

SS: (Only if you ask real nice-like!)

ID: ladies please, you're both beautiful.

ID: and also wasting your questions which is boring.

SS: (RIP trolling potential. (\qnq/) Well, you guys're the ones that up and said I can't say nothin weird.)

AA: you can't say nothing weirnd and you can't lead a rnebellion, eithern. >:P

AA: we'rne just, like, crnamping yrn style on everny level, ino.

SS: ( (\qnq/) )

ID: that's us. the fun policeradicators.

SS: (Never have I ever watched someone get electrocuted. (\eue/) )

ID: ....like to complete death.

SS: (Idk, Sipa, you still breathin?)

SA: oh that's what my question should have been

AA: y, y, trnagically. AA: he fucking maimed me forn no rneason at all.

SA: you electrocuted Sipara?

SS: (I shoulda up and said 'watched someone electrocute themselves like an idiot.')

ID: woowwww.

AA: idk what it waaaas.

SS: (Y, pals, I totes up and walked up to her and electrocuted her, 100% intentional-like!)

AA: arne you saying you wouldn't touch it??

AA: bc i rnefuse to believe it.

SS: (Well, on accounta I was there and didn't...)

SS: (I ain't seen you drinkin nothin yet!)

SA: oh dear

SA: why did you touch it?

SS: (It's cool, pals, flapbeasts like shiny ish.)

Got some rather non-lowkey snickering going on.

AA: idk what it was!! ofc i fucking touched it.

SS: (Breaking news: Troll touches fire, discovers it is hot.)

SS: (Results uncertain, more testing may be necessary.)

ID: annnyyywaaayssss.

Hadean's getting elbowed. Hard.

ID: never have i ever-

AA: >:{ M O V I N G O N.

AA: >:"{

Oof. Elbow back.

!!! SHOULDER BUMP BACK before her knee hits the laptop and she's scrambling to set it up straight again.

...Time for more snickering.

ID: never have i ever had horns shorter than a half a foot past 4 sweeps old. =>:( stop ruining the game pris.

SA; what did I do?

ID: sips i meant.

SA: oh

SA: did you all see that

ID: ...maybe booze does do something to me.

SA; I was falsely accused

AA: lmfao, arne you that sloshed alrneady?

AA: booze turns hads into a liarn and a traitorn. txt it!

Quick, do the touching your nose test. That's a real thing, right?

SS: (Did you just miss???)

AA: .............

SS: (I can't tell, everything's swimmy.)

AA: y.

ID: /no/.

AA: y, he did, oh my god.

AA: i saw it!!

SS: (I believe Sipa!)

SS: (She's a filthy liar but I totes believe her!)

AA: nevern have i evern fucking lied, even once, in my entirne goddamn life.

SS: (Take a shot, bulgeface!)

ID: ...note to self. i guess when i'm recovering from wounds i am not immune to alcohol.

SS: (Wait.)

SS: (Did I even do that right.)

ID: who's sloshed now? =>:(

SS: (Brb, need sober to drunk translator.)

SS: (Wtf, I ain't never claimed otherwise!)

SS: (Just ain't as wasted as you, on accounta I'm totes winnin. (\eue/) )

Grab the stupid bottle and take a swig. Hate life. Don't hand the bottle back over.

SS: (I think I win.)

ID: you don't win shit. =>:(

AA: lmfaaaao.

SS: (Won your dignitiy)

SS: (Dignity)

AA: hey, wait, gimme ittt.

SS: (Is that how you spell that.)

SS: (Brb voice to text.)

AA: it's a digginity.

AA: duh.

ID: dignasty.

AA: no voice to text, that's cheating!!

SS: (Digofuckyourself.)

SS: (No oculars, it's also cheatin!)

ID: just take your turn nerd!

SS: (... Oh.)

SS: (Right.)

SS: (Uh.)

SS: (Wait, no, I did!)

SS: (The zapping!)

ID: sips just went last.

finally rolls over to look at his computer again and see the NONSENSE that is happening.

ID: didn't. she.

AA: uh.

AA: .. shit i'm gonna go again.

AA: fuck it.

SS: (It's Hads's turn.)

SA: that's the spirit

ID: i want to go. =>:(

AA: nevern did i evern, like - n!

Elbow her again

SS: (It was me with the electrocution then ain't nobody else gone yet!)

SS: (I'm the soberest one here, that makes me right.)

ID: never have i ever been flirting in the other chat while playing a stupid drinking game.

BLAAAAAARGH NOISE. Then she flops over, using his shoulder as a chinrest briefly --

THEN ELBOWS HIM BACK

SS: (You're supposed to drink if you ain't done it, pal, neither of us is gonna be swigging asides you.)

AA: no one is fucking flirnting, gtfo out of herne.

ID: ...fuck.

SS: (A toast to Hads! (\eue/) )

ID: so you areee flirting tho.

SS: (Y, we are star-crossed and the most serendipitous of pitch lovers stolen away in the day! Sipa, when's handfasting??)

congratulations, there is now a flustered Sipara making faces at Hads. computer what computer.

SA: That's a lie hadean

And Hadean is just giving her back the smuggest maybe-a-little-drunk look back.

SS: (I would never lie!)

SS: (Asides, if I were lying, would Sipa be makin faces??)

SS: ((She's makin faces, right??))

ID: totes faces.

SA: 🥂

SS: (Cool! So we're all on the same page!) SS: (That page being she ain't put a tie on it yet and it's totes uncool.)

SA: a.. what on it yet?

SS: (My poor kokoro is going doki doki and she ain't even laid one on me!)

SS: (Upright not right, that is!)

SS: (... Downright?)

SA: downright wrong

SS: (Insert Common Alternian here.)

SA: is what you're learning for

SA: or outright wrong

SS: (Help, help, I'm bein gaslighted!)

ID: pris i may be. slightly affected by booze when my psi are busy with other things.

ID: who knew?

SA: you are all drunk off your asses

AA: aaaarngh.

AA: i'm not drnunk, yrn drnunk.

ID: i should have tried stabbing myself in the chest and drinking earlier.

SS: (I'm deffo drunk, but I'm not the most drunk on accounta I totes won.)

SS: (Also, n, don't do that.)

AA: and stfu, lal, i'll totally fucking kissing you, don't make a bd out of it. AA: i'll kiss you and hads and prni. i'll just, like. kiss evernyone. how's that? >:P

SS: (Chest has got vital ish.)

AA: y, trny that.

SS: (Stab your walkstub!)

AA: .. wait, shit, no, not prni.

AA: soz, prni.

ID: it needs to be a big wound to focus allll of my psi on it. it'll be fiiine.

SS: (And that's called bein a floozy, pal, I'll up and cry on accounta my kismet won't kiss me nor handfast me. (\qnq/) )

SS: (Mb Pri is right.)

SS: (Mb we ain't meant to be.)

ID: aww man is drunk drama a thing.

AA: i want to punch all of you but i caaaaaan't.

ID: i wanna play. =:(

SS: (Insert sniffling here.)

She punches Hads instead.

ON THE ARM

SS: (N, too late, I'm cryin.)

ID: but none of-

.. cue flustered shriek of dismay when she remembers his arm is, uh, slightly fucked.

THERE GOES SOME NOT VERY NICE SHRIEKS OF PAIN RIGHT THERE.

QNQ

sitS UP BOLT UPRIGT LSJSKAHL

AA: he's okay! he's okay!

SA: what was that?!

AA: nothing!

AA: evernything is fine!

his face is Hate

SS: (Tfw can't tell if cheating or murder.)

ID: =:'((((

SS: (Or who's gettin culled.)

AA: :{

ID: i think i'm partially sober now.

AA: .. look, yrn parnt of the drnunk drnama now.

AA: i made you feel included.

AA: yrn welcome.

SA: 😰

ID: =>:'((((

AA: drnink some morne antifrneeze.

SS: ( (\quq/) )

ID: you're buying me so many fucking pancakes in the evening.

ID: SO MANY.

SA: 🍮

AA: >:'{

Take the booze back and chug. Hard.

SA: Hadean--

SA: 😫

AA: chug, chug, chug.

SS: (Hads, protip, 'had alcohol poisoning' ain't a good thing be be able to up and say.)

SS: (Leastways not when you got it from shitty wine.)

SA: the wine would have to be proofed absurdly

ID: i'm fine. it's fine. =>:'(

SA: if he's eaten today he should be fine but if he hasn't

SA: I am kicking his ass

SS: (Idk, mb it's shitty sherry.)

AA: he's fiiiiine.

AA: he ate! we ate, uh.

SS: (Or port.)

AA: .. shit, wtf did we eat.

ID: food.

SS: (Or food coloring in vodka.)

AA: it was van food. like, y'know, the type of stuff that's, like, food colourning in vodka.

AA: n, fuck, i was rneading soz.

SS: (LOL)

AA: the type of stuff that's, like, you buy it out of a van!!

SS: (Wow, way 2 pregame!)

SA: did you mean street food

AA: omfg you can't spell prnegame

AA: yes!!!

AA: .. i'm hungrny. >:{

SS: (No, on accounta I spell it pregame and not prnegnanmne!)

AA: the way you spell it is prnenenenegofuckyrnself, duh.

AA: i know yrn blind btu c'monnnnnn. >:P

He's just gonna carefully shift his most uninjured side in to laying against Sipara.

ID: van food is the best food.

!!!

SS: (uh)

But then she chills and leans back against him. yesss, physical affection.

SS: (You wish I couldn't see, pal, mb I wouldn't have to deal w your spellin.)

SS: (Brb, I just stood up and)

SS: (Wow)

AA: it was, like, that foil wrnapped shit, prni.

SS: (Try standing up)

AA: !!

ID: ahahah no.

SS: (no do it)

AA: omg what happens

SS: (It's cool)

SA; that's street food, Sipara

AA: rnly?

AA: is it rnyl cool orn am i gonna crnack my head open.

SA: 😰

AA: >:{

SS: (It also hurts but that's only on accounta you will v quickly not be standin up!)

ID: i just got fucking comfy.

ID: ...fcuk that.

AA: omggg, lal. lal. sit down.

SS: (N, I'm floating.)

SS: (I mean, not proper-like, but it feels it!)

AA: don't brneak yrnselfff. i like yrnself.

ID: hahahah. i can see why people get drunk.

ID: it's almost like when i eat. only slow?

SS: (Only on accounts you asked real nice-like!) SS: (And also I totes like myself, too.)

SS: (And you, but I'm only sayin that without attachin three shitty jokes cos I'm wasted and that makes it seem less dumb.)

ID: only i'm allowed to break because sips hates me apparently.

SA: how are you all this drunk after a bottle of wine.

AA: lmfao no food.

AA: .. j/k we ate. i said we ate. rnight.

SS: (Excuse, I had... some number of shots of what I'm p sure is rubbin alcohol.)

ID: that was forever ago.

rubs the bridge of his nose... you can see his face finally and man he looks worn out your shenanigans sucked it right out of him

SA: order pizza?

ID: prisss. you're beautiful~

ID: and tired.

AA: prni. prniii. don't make that face. we love youuu.

AA: you get a pizza.

AA: we'rne talking to you. >:} so if oyu orndern a pziza. and we ordern a pizza.

ID: he doesn't like them!

AA: it'll be like we'rne all eatin -- oh goddamnit.

ID: make him order fancy food. like sushi.

AA: that doens't have calornies!!

ID: i don't know what else he likes to eat. other than sweet stuff.

SA: I am not--

ID: i'm a bad friend. =:(

AA: ordern baked salmon on a roasted cedarn plank.

but he flushes anyways because senpai said it

SA: I can order take out.

ID: pris you need to tell me more about yourselffff. let me in bro.

SA: not sushi..

SA: w--what?

ID: sips you gotta too. =>:( but you're easier.

AA: and yrn allowed 2 brneak bc yrn harndy, hads. duh. and AA: ugh why arne you all typing so much i'm trying to read the tpo and it keeps scrnolling down. >:{

SA: how does not knowing what...

ID: you gotta tell me more about yourself pris. =:(

SA: like what?

ID: even if i don't tell you shit. is that bad.

ID: like. things!

SA: i

SA: I don't know...

SA: id like to think you tell me things-- you're drunk, Hadean

ID: yes i am.

AA: what's that go tto do with anythingggg.

ID: but it's okay because i know i'm drunk.

ID: right?

SA: I feel as if it's impolite to try and have sensitive discussions when you're not completely sober...

SA: I will order you both pizza. What is the address

SS: (Well, it ain't sensitive-like for him, pal.)

SS: (He just, like, wants your deepest darkest secrets.)

SS: (Also wtf is this a pizza party now?)

SS: (Cos I ain't got none athat.)

ID: i'm sensitively wanting meat lovers. =:(

SS: (... Does stale muffin count??)

SA: I'd rather tell him those with just us there if he wants them, thank you

SS: (I can put ketchup on it.)

SS: (That's like bread and tomato stuff.)

SS: (Pizza!)

AA: arne you at taylorns, lal?

SA: Addresses

SS: (I lits live here, pal.)

AA: i'll get you actual pizza. w/ wine.

AA: er. anchovies.

ID: sips what's our address.

SS: (N, do it with wine!!)

AA: and how come i nevern get to be in, like, the cool feels talks??

SS: (Hads told me the truth bout your anchovy lies.)

SS: (Bc you don't kiss your princess, jerk.)

ID: i tried to include you sipsss.

AA: i will fucking smooch you, laledy, stfu.

ID: i got words for everyoneee.

looks as uncomfortable as he can for not being able to make expressions

AA: and prni didn'tttt.

ID: but i know. i shouldn't just message everyone.

ID: because that seems bad.

SS: ( (\qnq/) )

AA: you should msg evernyone!!

AA: just, like. tlk 2 them. like prni doesn't want to talk to me. orn in frnont of me. orn w/e. >:"{ AA: w/eee. lals i am getting you pizza.

ID: if i message em pheres will act like he can cull me. i don't want pheres to want to cull me.

SA: that's. Not true...

ID: maybe i can message ashy...

SS: (I'm kissin the pizza.)

SS: (..... Idk why! But I'm doin it.)

SA: don't message Ashley while you're drunk it will just be a mess

SS: (Message Pheres and tell him you've up and got feelins about him wanting to cull you!!)

AA: phern won't cull you. phern likes youuuu. he just doesn't - y.

SS: (Talk it out like bros.)

AA: do that. phern likes talking. and he likes you. it'll be fiiiine.

SA: i feel like this is all a terrible idea

ID: i'm not good at talking to pheres. we're too different.

AA: and i like yo and i like phern and you two should be frniends.

ID: and then i just make him mad i think.

ID: he'd probably be mad that i bit em even.

SA: yes that. Tends to happen.

AA: just tell him its, like, pitch.

SA: why not just wait I'm sure it will blow over

AA: he cna't argune w/ pitch.

AA: can't. argnue!!

SA: don't tell him it's pitch, don't you remember what he said at the fair?

AA: arngue.

SA: they can't say it's pitch, it will ruin his quadrant with Emerel

SS: (It's serendipity!)

SS: (Wait, what's pitch??)

ID: maybe i should just. call him and tell him to come on here...

SA: call who?

SS: (... You're pitch with Pheres's boo?)

SA: Pheres or Emerel?

SS: (Omg)

AA: you can't rnuin a quad if it isn't alrndy set to be rnuined.

AA: like, hivewrnecking isn't a T H I N G.

SA: he said he would make a club for them.

SS: (Y, when y'all were up and bout to vore each other.)

ID: =:( i don't want pheres to be my club.

SA: then don't say what happened between you and Emerel was pitch

SS: (You can;t, like, have a club if you ain't wantin a club, pal, that ain't how it works.)

ID: i just want to make em be the scared one next time.

SS: (Then it ain't a club, it's some asshole what can't mind their on biz.)

SA: ...😰

SS: (Also, that totes sounds like you need a club tho.)

AA: .. y, that isn't

AA: that's sornt of weirnd.

ID: i'm bad at this.

AA: n!! you just have to like

SS: (Sipa, pls tell me you ain't gonna dangle me out a wall aperture till I'm the scared one for revenge for the taser thing.)

SA: how are you bad at it-

AA: trny harndern.

SS: (Cos if anything you should be danglin your own pan for that one.)

AA: orn, like, talk about ittttt. do you want to bang him orn, like, murndern him??

SA:'try harder? Are you encouraging it?

ID: it wasn't fair that he beat me up when i was already beat up, was it?

SA: no.

AA: and n, lal, fuck offff. AA: no dangling!! forn anyone. >:P

AA: nnn, it wasn't.

SS: (All's fair in love and war, but hate ain't on that list.)

ID: so i don't think he hates me that way anyways.

SA: then you need a club or at the least to avoid each other

ID: i was avoiding him and i got beat up.

ID: so i just need to get better and beat him up.

ID: and then things'll be even.

AA: and prni. i'm not, like, encournaging it. AA: i'm just, like. hads gotta do what hads wants to do, you know?? i am suppornting him.

SA: that won't solve anything, he'll just hunt you down to get revenge again and then you'll do the same

ID: not if i beat him hard enough.

AA: and nnnnn. if yrn gonna beat him up again, you gotta talk to phern firnsttttt.

SA: then he will be dead

SS: (That's called, like, murder.)

AA: orn else he's ognna flip his shit.

ID: nahhh, i already tried murdering him.

SA: he's already going to flip his shit

AA: and then i'm gonna have to stop a fucking rnevenge cycle, and, like

ID: he got back up, remember!

AA: i don't want phern trnying to cull yyyou.

AA: that's the opposite of what i want. >:{

SS: (That's totes inconsiderate-like, hads.)

SS: (Plus, like, how're you gonna beat im harder'n dead, huh?)

ID: idk. em almost culled me when he jumped me.

ID: or at least it was considered i guess.

SA: why don't we tell Pheres Em hunted you down. That seems like a decent solution.

ID: nooo!

SA: if he instigated it he can deal with the consequences

ID: i don't wanna.

SA: why?

SA: it won't have any logical recourse on you..

ID: cause if they got unhappy and broke up i'd get blamed. duh.

SA: they will break up anyways if you and Emerel can't be resolved

AA: why arne you so fussed abt them brneaking up, anyway?

AA: you don't even like quads.

AA: >:?

SA: ^^

ID: i don't, but they do.

AA: phern is like. idk.

AA: ... idk!

AA: idk idk idk. >:{

ID: i feel like pheres would blame me. i don't wanna get blamed. it's easier to just not say anything about it.

SA: well the unfortunate news is this chat is public

SA: 😰

SA: how could Pheres blame you for Emerel's own mistake?

ID: ...pheres won't read this stuff, right.

SA: I think Pheres is much more logical than that

AA: phernes is puking in a bathrnoom rn.

AA: he can't rnead anythiiiiing.

SA: why--

ID: there! we just gotta bury this with other stuff.

ID: so it's so buried he won't go digging.

AA: idk, he got the flu, he's been, like, ternrnibad all day. AA: it's prnobs bc he's up at em's house. and it's, like, wet and shit.

AA: being wet isn't good forn you. ofc yrn gonna get sick if yrn wet.

AA: and brneathing in wet.

AA: >:{

SA: 😰

ID: unless you're a fish i guess.

AA: he's not a fish!!

ID: i didn't say he was.

SA: what even happened between you two to get all of this started, I don't understand.

AA: >:{

SA: It seemingly came out of left field that you two Had to fight and now you two Have to fight some more.

AA: and phern can't blame you, bc then i'd be upset, bc it's not fairn to blame you. AA: so therne.

ID: i can't say pris.

SA: alright ❤

ID: sorry. =:(

AA: >:?

AA: cna you say, like.. off-chat??

ID: no.

AA: >:????

ID: i just can't.

AA: shhh, that's fine, dnw.

AA: we all have ourn shady ass secrnets.

makes a little heart using his index fingers and thumbs. he's tryin rly hard to be comforting with sipara

AA: what the fuuuuck, that's too cute.

ID: y! =:) 💚

AA: 💞

fucking. his expression wilts a little and he looks away to hide it before letting his hands fall

SA: you two should eat. This can all be sorted out at a later time when you are properly sober.

ID: =:??? why are you looking sad? i thought we were having fun. is it not fun?

AA: priiii.

AA: did you eat??

AA: arne you hungrny?

AA: i get sad when i'm hungrny. so, like, mb you should eat, too.

SA: I'm alright, don't worry.

SA: i will eat when you two do.

ID: sips. go get the pizza. =:(

SA: did i make you both sad?

SA: I'm sorry.

ID: we're sad because we're worried about you!

AA: y. we'rne just sad bc yrn sad. if you arne sad. and if yrn not, then we'rne not sad, but, like, it's okay to be sad??

SA: please don't worry, I'm rather alright.

SA: trying to explain it wouldn't make sense right now anyways.

ID: okay. =:( we can talk about it when we're visiting.

ID: and you can both admire how great my ass'll look when i get my fancy fighting suit.

SA: ...Yes.

SA: if you would still like to by then.

manages a smile at the snark.

SA: You'll have to hurry and get here then.

SA: and sipara can offer tips to the tailor.

SA: for now, I should go get some food myself.

SA: I may be back later. Goodlight.

waves a little before closing out the webcam application

AA: good light!! ❤ ❤ ❤

AA: 💚

ID: light...

ID: i hope i didn't say something that made him sad.

ID: i was probably too pushy about wanting to know about him.

AA: nooo. i mean. mb? but nooo. AA: i think he's just - like -

AA: .. mb you should've done the thing. back at him. orn mb he's just sad we'rne not up therne??

ID: maybe. =:(

AA: dnw, dnw. AA: i don't think you can make him sad.

ID: well something made him sad. he's a nice guy.

ID: you're a nice girl.

ID: so you don't feel left out.

AA: lmfao, stfu.

ID: =:P

ID: you are! you're going with me and this is fun.

AA: i don't need secondhand backpats. >:} you two arne like. two pieces in an arnmornset.

ID: this is more fun than i've had in forever.

AA: aww.

ID: there's more than two pieces in an armorset!

ID: you're like the. metal fist that hits things hard piece.

AA: good. i miss trnavelling w/ ppl. i used to trnavel w/ phern. and then my club. but they don't anymorne. and it sucks.

ID: well i'm sorry. now you get to travel with me!

ID: and i bet my lusus enjoys the break. he's getting old anyways.

AA: and lmfao. that's the best piece. the fist piece. obvs.

ID: now he travels in style.

ID: the very best!

AA: >:P

AA: .. we will have to find you, like, an actual fax rnide, too. so he doesn't have to walk places so much.

AA: and you can sleep in a trnuck insteada, like, a fucking tent.

ID: i like my tent. when it doesn't leak.

VV: ♚ ~Evening, evening all~

ID: oh no it's aspartame.

ID: did i spell that right.

AA: yrn tent is grn888. but. leaks. and -

AA: >:?

VV: ♚ ~ Ah it's the one that spreads lies.

ID: fake-sugar stuff.

VV: ♚ ~ It's very rude to do so you know.

VV: ♚ ~ And rather unfair I'd say!

ID: i'm too drunk for a victim complex. =:(

VV: ♚ ~ it's not a complex I'm just hurt...

VV: ♚ ~ And what are you drinking tonight~? A watered down beer perhaps?

ID: gasoline.

ID: or at least it tastes like it.

VV: ♚ ~ That is certainly one way to warm yourself up~ Just don't flambe anything!

VV: ♚ ~ You really should try a higher class wine or something one day darling. You won't dissolve your insides and also it's much classier.

VV: ♚ ~ Than ah....gasoline...

VV: ♚ ~ I...I do want to be sure you know not to swallow when you siphon...

ID: i was gonna ask why you were being nice but you're still showing a lil two-face so it's okay lol.

AA: wwwwwwhy do we hate hern. AA: hern crnown is qt. orn is this a dude? his crnown is qt.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh?? I'm being conversational! It's really riveting and comes off as nice you actually try for once dear ID.

VV: ♚ ~ Thank you AA !

VV: ♚ ~ I'm not super sure myself but this one's rather hostile towards me 😦

ID: noo, see sips she hides thorns in the sugar.

ID: don't eat the sugar.

VV: ♚ ~ I mean, maybe you shouldn't if you're watching that waistline but I think our friend here is capable of thinking for themself~!

VV: Especially when consuming crude, crude gasoline.

ID: is your waistline something you worry about often.

VV: ♚ ~ I don't know if I've mentioned it before or if you're simply too far inhebriated but yes I do! As a ballerina off and on season I must be well kept and trim.

VV: ♚ ~ Do you not?

AA: lmao, she is a little barnbed.

ID: i have an abnormal... uh...

ID: thing that burns calories.

AA: arne you a ballernina orn arne you a comballernina?? AA: tl;drn do you murndern ppl w/ dance orn just dance.

AA: it's a metacatolim. i am p surne.

VV: ♚ ~ Metabolism deary!

VV: ♚ ~ Metabolism is the word you desire. I see the gasoline is muddling your brain and burning your insides so you can not spell. I'm filled with fright I will truly miss you....

VV: ♚ ~ And ah- I suppose it would depend wouldn't it? I'm a prima ballerina for performing but ah we live in such a rutheless world!

VV: ♚ ~ Who knows what one can do when backed into a corner :3c

AA: lmao. omg. yrn adornable.

VV: ♚ ~ Thank you!

ID: no she isn'ttt.

AA: i'm too tirned to even sass you back. but gd.

AA: she isssssss.

AA: she calls ppl dearny. that's prnec.

ID: she just wants something. they always do when they're sweet.

AA: prnec as F U C K. like she's yrn spoopy ancestor gonna back you into a cake.

VV: ♚ ~ Aw~ Thank you. VV: ♚ ~ Maybe I want friendship.

AA: y. mb she wants frniendship.

AA: have you considerned that, hads.

AA: >:'{

ID: /no/. =>:(

VV: ♚ ~ A cake...mmm mm I don't know any cannibals so that'd be a waste

VV: ♚ ~ You should consider it! It's a rather common things trolls want.

ID: =>:( why would you want friendship. you're fluffy.

ID: ....that makes more sense in. my head.

VV: ♚ ~ I am rather fluffy. I permed up my hair today thank you~

VV: ♚ ~ And because I'm of rouged hue and in general when one lives in the city one would desire a friend or two.

VV: ♚ ~Do you not like to have friends Hadean?!

ID: i have two friends. and they didn't just. come in saying they wanted to be friends!

AA: omgg. show me yrn headfluff.

VV: ♚ ~ I didn't do that either! You weasled the answer out of me. I was under the assumption a chat room was a place to socialize.

VV: ♚ ~ Will do let me go get my selfie light one moment!

AA: my rnail has fluffy hairn too. i want to see if it's biggern!!

AA: omg yesss.

ID: a chatroom is a place to pick fights.

ID: and lay on sipa.

ID: ...no wait that part's not the chatroom.

AA: idc don't move yrn waaarnm.

ID: i don't want to get up so it's fine.

voraciousVanity has sent CouldBFluffier.jpg

VV: ♚ ~ I'm baaaaack~! VV: ♚ ~ There you go!

AA: good. AA: and --

AA: omg ❤ ❤

AA: you arne so fluffyyyyy.

VV: ♚ ~ 💗 And I will be for the next week!! VV: ♚ ~Also I must, MUST inquire. Are you two...in the same room?

ID: nope, laying on her in different rooms.

AA: i am fixing his hairn thrnough the internwebs, it's trnue.

VV: ♚ ~ Ah. I see I see. VV: ♚ ~ It all makes sense... VV: ♚ ~ You need better lying skills!

VV: ♚ ~ How matted is his hair?

ID: it feels nice tho-

ID: my hair isn't matted stfu.

AA: lmfao. AA: it's strn8 as a stick. that doesn't matt. i think.

VV: ♚ ~ You will have to make me ''stfu"'!! Hohoho

ID: u a ho alright.

VV: ♚ ~And ah it can! If you keep it too unclean and disgusting. I have seen it.

AA: omggg, even yrn laughing is qt.

AA: LMAO.

VV: ♚ ~ What proof have you at those acusations mmm?

ID: the proof of shut up.

VV: ♚ ~ As good an arguement as I should've expected out of you..

ID: idk you're the one arguing with a drunk troll.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm truly not! I'm seeing what responses I can get from you mostly before they turn to you just drooling on the keyboard!

VV: ♚ ~ I have a little timer going and everything.

AA: aww, yrn less qt now.

AA: go back 2 being twee.

ID: the mask slips~

VV: ♚ ~ Boooo, am I not allowed to have fun?

VV: ♚ ~Hadean's bullied me so I thought a bit of fun would be allowed!

ID: it's not bullying if it's true.

VV: ♚ ~ Mmmm it's not true if you have no proof 😦

ID: is too.

VV: ♚ ~ Tell me dear sweet Hadies, spreader of lies. Why did you choose to drink gasoline tonight?

ID: peer pressure.

ID: and a game.

VV: ♚ ~ ohhh a game? What form of game ?

VV: ♚ ~ Did you lose said game?

ID: never have i ever.

ID: i don't think you can win. just get drunk.

VV: ♚ ~ I see, I see. VV: ♚ ~ I do so wish you'd purchased something better than paint cleaner however.

VV: ♚ ~ Not wine, that's for sipping...

ID: i didn't do it. sips diddd.

VV: ♚ ~ Why would this Sips person do this to you 😦

VV: ♚ ~ Rather cruel if you ask me

ID: ahahah hear that sips, you're crueellll.

SA: little princess

SA: Hadean 😊

VV: ♚ ~ Ah!! Prisma evening my honeycomb prince

ID: heyyy pris! =:) did you eat?

SA: good evening. How are you?

SA: yes. I went to a nearby place. They have very good spaghetti.

ID: goooddd. i'm good. sip fell asleep and she's heavy. i think i'm trapped.

VV: ♚ ~ I'm grand! Hearing about them drinking acetone.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh my.

VV: ♚ ~ Ah...it was nice knowing you Hadies.

VV: ♚ ~ Truly tragic.

SA: oh, the wine. Yes. I tried to play for a moment but I lost my appetite for liquor after someone brought up genetic material.

SA: perhaps you could squeeze free in a bit?

ID: ahahah sorry prisss.

SA: or stay... I am unsure what to advise 😨

SA: it wasn't your fault.

VV: ♚ ~ ....genetic material

VV: ♚ ~ Perhaps staying may be best advised as in most situations of distress it's advised to stay still !

ID: hahah she's alright for now. like a slightly coolish blanket. we can do this the three of us if you wanna when we get there pris.

VV: ♚ ~ Ohhh? Where are you all traversing to? VV: ♚ ~ 😢 I was certain I was invited to travel with you Prisma, was I wrong?

SA: oh, to... cuddle...?

ID: 😒

ID: yes to cuddle.

SA: we could still travel, little princess. I am meeting Hadean and Sipara first, though. I apologize.

SA: oh..

SA: I think it may be awkward with me involved. 😰

VV: ♚ ~ I see, I see prior business then! Do travel safe! VV: ♚ ~ That does sound rather private a matter...oh my....the cuddling.

ID: why would it be awkward? =:?

SA: I am not very accustomed to physical affection and I am rather cold.

ID: you wanted a hug earlier. =:(

SA: I wouldn't want to ruin you two bonding

SA: it's different from cuddling..

ID: we can all bond. cold is nice!

SA: they are coming to me, little princess. Not the other way around

ID: cuddling is just like... a long hug.

VV: ♚ ~ Oh my mistake! Very well. Regardless don't imbibe the polish remover like they have. It seems to be eating them from the inside out!!

SA: yes... I-well, it's different for me, im sorry.

SA: but I'm happy you invited me 😊

SA: I only drink sweet wines if any if ever.

SA: not... what they were drinking.

ID: it wasn't good. but i liked being involved. =:)

ID: and okay pris. no cuddles i guess.

SA: maybe next time we could get decent liquor... if there is a next time. I. Doubt it for some reason.

SA: ...

SA: yes

VV: ♚ ~ I have a few saved up if you wish to try some higher end brands Honey comb Prince dearest~! VV: ♚ ~ maybe even take one with you ...I almost take personal offence to...to....Hadies current poison.

SA: oh, that would be kind of you.

ID: don't get drunk with the splenda prisss.

SA: I would be sad if that was Hadeans first and only experience with wine

VV: ♚ ~ Again with the lies. Cruel...

SA: we could try some sweet wines together if you'd like, Little princess

VV: ♚ ~ If Hadies ceases in his name calling I'd love to!

SA: ii don't drink to inebriation. It's alright.

SA: he's calling you sweet

ID: yeahhh splenda. why you so cruel to me?

VV: ♚ ~ Splenda is artificial and not the best choice for sweeteners!

VV: ♚ ~ Agave would be nicer.

ID: sweet n low it is.

ID: sweet n lowblood.

VV: ♚ ~ That is fine with me I have no qualms with my hue.

SA: agave nectar...

SA: oh. What did you want to know about earlier, Hadean? Before I forget to ask

SA: it is a very pretty color

SA: reds are passionate and courageous

VV: ♚ ~And being golden is a rather lovely shade as well Prisma~

VV: ♚ ~ But I do enjoy the compliment, I do my best to uphold such honors~!

ID: ...i don't remember.

VV: ♚ ~ Asking when he's less poisoned may be best sweet Apollo.

ID: apollo.

ID: man you're stretching for nicknames now.

SA: oh-- I'm sorry. Maybe if you remember

SA: thank you. Although I am far more green

VV: ♚ ~ I suppose. Mmm allow me to rethink of a deity.

ID: i'll try!

ID: and why does he have to be a god.

ID: pris is pris.

SA: I think for the sake of imagery but I am unsure how I could be remotely worthy of that

VV: ♚ ~ I simply thought a deity reference would be nice!

SA: Hadean I should give you a nickname. Like little princess has

ID: shoot pris. =:P

SA: I don't know... but I should think very hard about it

ID: ...i'm not good at nicknames. other than pris.

ID: take your time! you'll come up with the beesstttt nickname.

VV: ♚ ~ Upon deliberation. I'm sticking with prince it goes well with my nickname.

SA: I could call you Little prince but that wouldn't be fitting at all

SA: I am littler

ID: sorry i'm tall~

VV: ♚ ~ I wouldn't feel so special if we had almost identical nick names....

SA: it has to be as brash and capable as you.

SA: no, I know little princess I wouldn't do that

ID: mm, shame that you don't know how to share~

SA: I would be disappointed if you gave me a nickname and then gave Sipara or Gliese a similar one

SA: but maybe that's expected of me..

SA: hotshot would work but it implies I'm insulting you

VV: ♚~ Share? Ohhoho VV: ♚ ~ I'm very creative I can give plenty various nicknames but only those I feel deserve one hoho

VV: ♚ ~ Hot shot sounds like a racer!

ID: why would it be expected of you? =:?

ID: hotshot sounds like it could be. weird. like. fighty.

SA: I... wouldn't want to go in great detail.

SA: but I am considered the "jealous type" more often than not

SA: encouraged to be, you could say. Protective

ID: ohh. yeah. well remember what we chatted about for that!

VV: ♚ ~ The jealous type? 0: How unexpected Prisma!

VV: ♚ ~ I feel that's a rather common trait however.

ID: i'm sure a lot about pris is unexpected. when you've only talked to him a few times. uwu

VV: ♚ ~ Which is why I intend to speak more!

SA: 💚

ID: 💚

VV: ♚ ~ What is more exciting than learning about another? ❤

ID: sticking toothpicks in my ganderbulbs.

SA: please don't I like your eyes

ID: awww. 💚

SA: it comes and goes sometimes, Perdia. But on the whole it stays. Are you a jealous type?

SA: ... to both of you

SA: I would be happy to learn more about you too. Perdia

ID: idk. i could be i bet.

VV: ♚ ~ It would depend! Ah-- I'd love to say no but truly at the heart of it all yes! I do have a fondness for not being tossed to the shadows.

VV: ♚ ~ Any troll really is capable of it. Under the right circumstances, yes?

SA: I don't think anyone enjoys being treated like an object that can be returned to the shelf

SA: I may need to enhance calm before I become salty

VV: ♚ ~ Oh of course not, it's simply a tragic thing. So a little jealousy seems rather justified in such a situation? Why would one sit back and just let fate sweep them aside dear?

VV: ♚ ~ Ah! Has this struck a nerve? We may cease if it isn't a desirable thing Prisma

SA: it would be a very painful thing, yes. Especially if it felt.... special. I suppose is the word

SA: I simply have a bad taste left in my mouth regarding someone who ... had feelings for me

SA: and conveniently pushed them aside because they believed I "could never have feelings in return"

SA: then boasted about how happy they were with the person they'd replaced me with

SA; unpleasant to say the least

VV: ♚ ~ Oh dear sweet Prisma.....

VV: ♚ ~ I thought such cruelties were only in the stories written for the stage....

SA: haha

SA: there's no need to be so dramatic. I have found out enough to believe it may be perfectly normal and I only just now experienced it

SA: I am okay. If a bit miffed.

SA: but thank you

VV: ♚ ~Oh I promise i'm not being dramatic! It's truly heartbreaking dear Prince. I suppose perhaps I also just have not experienced it then.. VV: ♚ ~ I'm pleased you're at least alright now ah...

SA: i was angry when it happened. But only a little. I am not capable of much

SA: I am happy you haven't had to. Hopefully you never will 😊

SA: you seem happy with your matesprit anyways I doubt he would do that

VV: ♚ ~ Mmm yes. He never would trust me. We're on rather friendly terms. VV: ♚ ~ I would think even if something were to go awry I'd still hold him dear and near. VV: ♚ ~ It's rather hasty to simply cut one off no?

SA: who never would trust you?

SA: your matesprit?

VV: ♚ ~Oh, I forgot a comma. I mean in the sense of...he never would and you should trust me on this

VV: ♚ ~ It wouldn't look very good on him if he did! To give up so easily. VV: ♚ ~ But regardless I won't dwell on that hypothetical!

VV: ♚ ~ Loyalty is a good quality overall.

SA: oh! That was an unfortunate loss. I was almost concerned.

SA: loyalty is a virtue. I think it is most important

SA: little princess. I'm sorry, I should rest.

SA: I have cases to finish and plans to make

SA: goodlight ❤️

VV: ♚ ~ Rest well good light dearest! ❤

[failinginvestigativejournalist]

Dont freak out, itss just writing

i grew up fast (so fast) (too quick nigga) (wish i went through when i was just a bit bigger) can you tell me who the parent is uh ya the first time i drove a whip i was a fuckin kid, (96 suburban nigga) (yo yo, did you tell em why) oh ya shit my fault my mom was bleeding from her chin i dont know what from or what about, scared to death i took that drive to the ER (Medical SHIIIT) (mom got too drunk again and feel out) (wheres dad? in his room his doors locked, figures i dont expect, as i try to knock (no answer nigga) i dont blame em he removes himself from the sitiation so he dont hit her) ya i fucking grew quick, ya i fucking tryed some shit, the first time i dropped out and took some shroomies i was age 6 plus 6, thats 12 for the illiterates, actually aas a matter a fact it was fuckin pleasant as fuck as i drew back the droe and took another hit. now that i think that was the day, older brother came and gave me cig i obliged no way to say nay, i was still trippin and it was a sensational feelin, it left me stumblin and dizzy a head rush like no other i was hooked for live to the day and i dont blame him, i dont think he knew what he had started, adding to the compilation of the monsxter inside that took refuge and started, poison in his mind, the drugs altered his brain activity but he was buckled up and commited to the ride.Shit i just said in third person let me apologize to yall sometimes the ideas flow together like two fortune five mergin, these feels of hate be strong ya im hurtin, i cant blame no one, i cant choose the family i was birthed in, started sniffin ups felt my blood surgin, gotta big head but my nemisis, the evil inside myself was bigger aboutt the size of a white sturgeon, like some northern ish that canadain shit like british columbia or somethin idk, alls i can say is that BC bud out that bitch is my fav to blow, the sour D, diesel to be exact for you niggas who waana try to nit pick or correct my personal facts, let me just speak at you,  all the hatin niggas tryin bring me down, bad news, i do drugs like steve from fuckin blues clues, but my rents always on time when that xshits due, any ways i side tracked speaking of tracks just lined some shit up did with speed did with need i did it with tact, im dextrous and shit i always have a unique train of thought oh shit trains again trains derailed at this point hhaaha i crack myself up sometimes with the wit in my words leh-let you in on the pun so you can join in my fun, about the lines the lines are no more you didn arrive in time i promise these raps have rhythm they have rhyme i aint spittin to waste your time, i aint spittin to catch a dime, bag or bitch, it really dont matter, niether last long but they are still my niche, come here bitch come hit this shit, this time dont have a fit, mind over matter just stick yuh nose in these rails sit down for a bit, drink some wata, go to your happy place we are gettin to old for me to have tote on yuh just from hitten lines but i put up wit it, you got that 50 thou boat on yuh, not to mention your ride, that shit is so sweet i cant decidddee which id rather seed, as in inseminate with my seaman as i play the part as a seaman workin for seimans on a marine voyage i aint like you im a higher being, i dont know whatchu talkin whatch your eyes be seein i am a divine heathan i really cant fucking believe a niggas still breathin im a florida boy born and raised, i sit the fuck back drink my beer in the shade, high as i usually am a rinny tin tin rinscotts tale \down the rintin like a shark fin poatched by commercial fisherman thrown in a bin, no regard for life the human race is so greedy, people just aint my type, say what you want i know me best and i know im right. my creative talents on the other hand be outta sight, im my own worst enemy to cross the bridge pay the fee, trollin in the hood for that g, withdrawin, shakin i drop to my knee look up to the sky ask god if he sees. hear the sound of humming, huh must be bees, or im trippin out maybe its a flash back i dont remmember. whats th-this street, tremblin think my heat skipped a bit, or a couple shakinso bad my knes begin to buckle, anxiety can be dibilatated held me back from so much in life thers no debating. unfamiliar route. made it to this bar ordered a stout got to thinking, you may ask what about, this is why i like solitude to be on my own to answer to noone to depend on myself and live it to the fullest while im yung, my mind will reel, replaying all i know every single memory, that im capable of bringing back, i compare my brain to a file cabinet, i keep it hidden like in an office towards the back. A photographic memory is a gift and a curse, ill tell you whatat, if you dont keep it in check you will end up in a herse, sure you can remember the happy shit the good things in your life but you cant fucking forget the huge hits the fucking bad bitch the one who broke your heart? dounno how to forget you but i think i know where to start, i thought it was drugs, i numbed my body with chemicals little did i know with every shot the metaphorical shovel scooped out some more dirt from the inconcievable whole i fuckin dug. my life has been weird kinda like an opriental from a flee market an awkward rug, with no real spot in the house, was always the black sheep in the fam i tryed to tip toe as quiet as a mouse, some tom and jerry shit my mistakes and regrets cbhasing me around like tom the cat from that shit, I hide in my hidey whole, disconeected from any social environmeent i often found myself cryin, but self loathin is kinda like being a a gay with some dicks hes blowin, givin a ski job pitty is the lube hatred is the tube the vessel to carry out a deed the fags not sure about, hes experimentin comparable to some situations in my life cept wont catch me with two dudes in a shower, that was just a metaphor. you feel me? im sure the haters will hop all over that verse but just fuckinh hear me. I got my shades on and these bitches special, haters they block, they keep you no fun, sticklers out of sight out of mind like spf 75 sun block, that industrial shit, factory born hear the lunch bell on the horn, an  hour passes the busy bees come back to the floor to join the others to join the masses; the hoard., here the hum of the worker bees at work as they sneek rum in there flasks stuck it in to the hive got it past the queen time to catch a buzz to make this pain stop while i avoid the fuzz the narks at work, cant control it even if they wanted to stop. i dont want to hurt. this was a metaphor for the endless rut of a reality ive become accustomed to; succomed too, the low of the low. comparable to a german trench on the frontlines., my life feels like a conveyer belt, makin the same product running the same direction never really goiong any where, now thats was an analagy, keeping up? yung unsensitive how many? 0 fucks, 0 fucks giveen, 0 blights forgiven, spiteful to death and mornful for noone, nothing left inside just another no-go, malfunctioning product family be like feeling “ i feel like they robbed us” of our brother our son and our friend , dont worry fam im still with you in your hearts up to the end. im tired of our society with all its malice and fallacy, thinking to my self how sad it must be, to be washed in the brain to be hypnotized, this shits so insane.you want that shit super sized? of course nigga watchu you sayin. A glutonous society obsessed with self indulgence people actually still believe good people are in abundance. Speaking of which, fuck the people for a tec, have you looked around lately, this earth is a wreck, mark my words we headin straight for destruction, We are not being good care takers, we fuckckin actin so careless what doesdo the opeople in power really expect?? just pass it on to the next generation “ohh, its not our life time we will leave it for you” Thats a big fuck you to the generations after you undeserving self entitled fucks finallyy croak. get the fuck outa here, tell me when you sold your sold, you heartlesxs bastards would give anything for xsome more of that paper thgat rules all, the pressure you have put on everyone, no one is an exception, to support ourselves and loved ones to provide for our own and multiple other peoples nees, the urge to make money looms over our heads like a pestiliant storm cloud of angst and uncertainty, boreing a fucking whole in our moral, making peoplpe desperaate rising crime rates because people get desperate, people need to survive and they will do dam near whatever it takess to make the money they need, for whatever purpose.  ill whipe my ass with it throw in your cards i will win you better fold. i have freeedom, you ask what? anominity you fuckers, i can moldd my own life i have the freedomm of choosing, i certainly dont have to wait for legislation to pass a bill which you bribed for votes to do so anyways, to do something something much worse than im capabloe of ever doing, intentionally ruining the environment and turning our planet to mars just for paper with and idea (with a “hey, take our word for it, its worth something “””WE PROMISE”””” fucks) behind it not even gold bars, fuck you niggas mark my words illl bring all you mother fuckers down, ill run you fucks out of town, you hear that sound? its a train. its my passion and my determination to take you out, maybe ill use a fuckin plane? i mean its o.k. for the CIA to do it, right? Create this ridiculously elaborote ruse this plot, thyat fucking fooled all the ignorant and brainwashed americans you have already sucked in with your cancerous propaganda, kids lost to your bullshit through social media and the fucking criteria you make teachers teach young minds, we are taught from a very young age that “ huraaahh america is number one! Terrorists bad! Environmental destruction of a planet good!” how about we help some of the third woorld countries (which you know we wouldnt have to be gunning down women and children in the streets) we could just like give them the water they need? help them gentrify there communities teach them how to develop better skills, teach them more efficient ways to take advantage of their land, maybe bring some seeds to food sources that can be grown creating a bit of self sustainability that may not be indigenous but would grow in their country?? you greedy fucks just want oil, when we have enough in our reserves in alaska/canada to last north america 500 years falsey blame others, create an imaginary war “the war on terrorism, which infact is a fucking cover a false entity, to entice patriotism to loosely keep this crumbling empire together the last attempt, the only thread left in the button holding up the pants we call america, you forgot to tell the word all that shit is just whack  [ simply a meticulously pplanned and executed ploy to spur interests in the middle east, control the oil and power will return back east, return to u, Cause god knows you tax the fuck out of us for EVERYTHING especially mnother fucking gas, so we can pay for wellfare and pay for fucking solar power for rich fucks who e==inherited wealth, people who hdont know what working a day means and never will be, never had a problem, never been broke “oh shit my fucking croket set is missingg a ball” lose the pretense fuckers, you cocksuckers, arrogant low lives.. Money makes you any better then the hard working man that cover your tax breaks pay like our fucking ppolice forces (who are a bunch of ROTC drop outs with a badge and sense of power nnow being unfair and crooked taking some kind of revenge on the idea of the kids who picked on them all through out school” Motherfucker its harder to become a plumber, the learning and process is longer/more rigorous then a 6 month police academy which is fucking my lil pony world ( ith ink there is a fantasy kids show for my lil pony with their own fantasy dimension/world)compared to a military bootcamp.  A doctrine instilled to stop the spread of communisim wherever and whenever it may presenet itsxelf? when is the fighting going to stop in that area of our dying earth, thjey have been fighting eachother since lifes initial birth, what whoever was in power or in charge of trading the petroleumn to us wanted to charge an extra dollar 4 dollars  aBARREL instead of 3??? whaa you fucking greedy cunts,? so we invade and take control put there people on dog collars?? for wshat a dollar difference in productionfreedom of speech as you mothers suck the livlyhood from our home like a blood sucking leech, so careless, you know exactly what your doing, you just dont care it aint your problem your headin towardcs the end your death is brewin, well im the reaper of death cloaked in black i always get my man like a cold inwe can hardly co-exist and efficiently function. We are on world one love bob marley shit im getting tired of going throught the motions im all fucked up inside and shit. Early development can be a lynch pin. to either set a strong first corner stone, ceremonial placement of the first corner stone, free mason shit, corn and vegetable oil, so many customs and traditions are goin down a fuckin hill catch em rollin. Early  life is so fucking critical for a young kid, childrens minds are like a sponge they are looking up to their elders they are developing mentally they consume everything around them and retain more than you know, give your kids a healthy and stimulating environment and they will let there talents grow let there talents show let there brilliance flow let there inhibitions go, gone like dust in the wind, never catch em in trouble nothing, not one sin. They will begin to get older, be super organized, super focused for school, every class haxs a folder. As you watch them grow you will feel it in your heart you will fuckin kno, atleast you did this at least you used your parental guidance for good. when you die you know youll be missed, your kid dont throw fits, not one bit, hes such a chip off the old block that was cliche as fuck haha tuck em inh for bed his forhead you kiss. I just might fucking shed a tear, I cant fight this urge to drink a beer. I cant deny this fucking fear, I must look like just like headlights shinin onm a deer, jock strap aroun d my ankles, dumbfounded, look in  my eyes, perplexed, look on my face as it hits, you get a certain taste in your mouth this race is coming to a close suddenly your filled with doubht, seriously you should be care free, yuou did your duty as a parent, im jealous wish that was me, chill the fuck out go drink some fucking relaxing tea or something, sobrietyy seems to be a good mixture along with love and rationality to make a family function like a well greased machine, like a mechanisim freshly whipped down with some white lithium grease. tuned and ready to go, temped to huff the fumes and left everything go, turn your car on shut the garage door, let death grip  you, dont seem to care anymore, I cant change the past and i have no regreats, will i make it to thirty? “right over here people!” “place your bets!”, ill take my tickets to my Life Show and just scalp em make some extra cash, im already absent, so detatched;incapable of feeling. even if im there aint nothing going on emotionally in there (guarantee you im smilin an nodding i really dont give 2 fucks no more”, take that money right to the plug i promote fucking drugs not hugs, or why not both? why does the saying have to be one or the other when sxometimes its both you desire the most. Take the scalpin’ money from the tickets to the play of my life, go on down to the hood, pick up some bags mis amigos habla “Drogas” los hermanos tambien, this urge is hard to fight. Its a romance [a ritual of being, so0mething un explainable i wish i was never a part of, im always metaphorically bleeding. My poker face is strong, fuck showing weakness i alwayxs thought it was to show emotuion. wrong....... but its not, it can save your life, can \get you through, throw you a life jacket, get you out of that tide you fought, that frigid water no warmer than dry eyes.. Ive always been a loose cannon, I go with the flow, not lookin back, been chillin with the old heads they were suprisxed i could hang and, back to the point haha literally or figuratively is the question... im not gonna keep you waitin or leave yall hangin, i hate cliff hangers, make me wait 45 five minutes leave me jonesin’ its slow goin like grindin that ‘crete in the hangers polishin’ that baby out and coatin with some apoxy, its a process, i just get my drugs, whate=vers around and hit bangersz til i pass out, thatsx how my life has been goingg, i feel like im in the chambers just waiting to be gassed out. Flip the fuuckin switch you fuckin pussy end all this malcontent and hate, make itt black, eternal reest at loast.. dress me up real nice maybe a sharp vest, go through the processions and go through the motions fucking burn my body bitches, i want to be in the ocean ive always felt drawn to it, like an unexplainable,, unatainable unfakeable feeling or notion. im happiest sippin a coctail right by the ocean,  thats where you put me to rest... ill be pissed as fuck dont treat me like a fucking ruck; i beenn aroound, age is but a number, my knowledge is  vast and profound, ya thats right bitch im fuckin educated, know more tthan you will learn in your life time and im 20 years, old get what im sayin? i dont got a big heaad im actually humble,  just at my  breaking point. if i was a volcanoe you would feel the rumble; the pre-emptive signs of an eruption pre-determineed in the creator’s mind he took his divine time to find a wayy to grin away the time it took to find the book i bind when al i want is to be stress free and unwind but im the opposite wound up liike the grandfather clock i wish i could stop , the wheels are in motion the gears are set to full speed the feels keep comin i got this itch; this notion, this inkling to stop minglin, stop wastin my time with u useless fuccks. i think its time, its not the end my journey, just started this epic tale of sorrow, my feelings have departed, im fuckingg frozen over colder than ice, dry ice. cant touch me im full of hate and vice, addictive personality on a suicide mission like a ffucking missionary willing to die for his faithh,. i wish man willing to be a martyr for his religion.. ya bitch i smoke stoges in the hotel room just send the  bill to him if it comes to me itll end up in the fucking rubbish bin with a looggie on top coughin up brown shit to young for that talk, to young for heart disease pack and a half a day to try to keep my miind at ease, the stress is buildin im like a tickin time bomb, im so wound up like a clock rigged to blow mount vesuvius, a test nuke... the alarm is soundinn off. A  bright flash like a million lightning strikes, bout to pop off.. but atleast with style got my limited eddition nikes, listen to me i soound like them, listen to me bitching like a fucking fem, bottle it up, thats what society saays, male suicide is at an all time high like two polar opposites due to wed, its never gonna work im always going to be sad im always going to hurt, no fuck it, im a lock it up and throw away the key, im gonna forget about all this shit and be a fuckin G, be hardcore like the brothhers, leave bitches cryin in the street like aall our fuckin mothers, 32 degrees ferenhiet tatted on my left pec it signifies the tempture of my heart no longer warm and red, its frozen over, it hardly beats, that shit is smaler than the grinches, i turned into what they want me to be, a danger to society, getthe fuck outa myface before i shoo,t b, I got nothing to lose, living for nothing, nada, goose eggs nigga dont give a fuck reckless, no regard for life i dont give two fucks a partridge in a ghetto street, aint no merry christmas song, i like my biches thick and dirty wearin'n some fesh tomy thongs, i use em abuse and enthuse them then ruse thm excusse them fuckin confusethem "why you so distaant all of the suden" keep the vow of silence, like a monk on a holy missio, a friar on a divine quest, sending telepathic messages look into my eyes and see, get the fuck out i was never real these feelings meant nothing to me manipulator, manipulationist making up woprds never been a relationist, the masster of his craft a ventrilliquist or a puppet master you were to blind to see, mama was right just a socio path, ya bitch tell your 7 year old child that; see how long his chipper attitude lasts, im lower than nothing, not even a worm maybe i could bbe a fucking tick suckin blood, noting left of the kid i used to be, no more self worth, i cant love you when i cant love myself, how you expect me to support you when all i do is grab a spoon andd melt all the money thaat comes my way, a junkie, bum destined for an early  death and you think yous my bride to be, sorry hun you reaad me wrong, i know its hard cause bitches never know whats goin on inside my head, as i lay in bea,d staring off to somewhere, anywhere but next toyou, staring off into space thinking about my drug abuse, asking myself why, but i know the answer ready to die, but i think ill get a lapper frm one more danceer, i wanna go out in style, not som lame shit maybe go up to a mountain and stand on a cliff, look down, see wher im destined to end up as i take the safety off, finger carressing the trigger, a cool wind blows as i prepare to leave my loved ones bitter, surprised they sstayed aound thislong only ever let em down ever since i was young, never good enough always disappointing this rap comes so easily writing it like noothing, to get this off my chest as theend comes near, i shaped my own destiny i chose to die, now i chose to die here, fuk your beliefs and your faith in gods plan i took my life intomy own fucking hands, i think we all know einstiens theory of insanity, i been doin the same shit fr so long now exspectin shit to change and, i guess im insane.. i took my brilliiant, my sharp mind and put it to waste. its time to pull the inevitable, the good die young idk in this case if thats viable, im scummy i did whatever it took to get my fix to kill that pitt  in my tummy. i hurt people close, i stole from my famil.y.. its time to end it, like i caqme into the world, by myself always alone, soemthing that my father toldme that really stuck, its cynical as fuck, but he was right. he said stay out of the bullshit the groggy muck. Only lookout for yourself son, ive been arounnd awhile, [people dont give a fuck about anyone else they care only for themselves, in the end at the most critical time they will always choose them instead of some one else. We are alone in this wrld and its the hard truth jut learn not to ddepend on others while you are still in your youth, ive been fucked over to many times by people i thought i was very close to. now im out to get mines me and only me you and only you, get that fucking look on ur face sorry for beeing real and telling the truth, im trying to prepare your for whats ahead, im tryig to prevent you from depending on a brutus who will fill you with lead, stab you in the back for their own personnal gain, being to trustworthy is a heroic flaw like being egotistical, wanting to help your friends to much, being aragont ect. kryptonite to super man pease dont be batman and let it be yourr bane, bane as in the villian to let you know. im back, here are my words again not my dads, ji really do miss all the relationships i had, havent spoken to my dad in years tookk one for theteam stayed with mama dukese inj the ssplit to save faace, foir my innocent younger brothers. you know what shes also my motheer, shes not capable of surviving alone i didnt think i would abandon her ever i thought id never do that, i stuck with her out of evveryone, a family oof six she looked out for me in times of strife wish i could give her one last kiss, just shot my last 20 and i fucin missed, absesses dont matte any more i bet this 45 shoots true time for the finale,  no way i can miss, as the curtains close on my young life one last thought people really took to me, like white on rice, women were drawn to me the mystery i had them enticced, June baby as a cancer i am hard to understand i met a chick once who had a spot in my liifes bnd, she knew me we had a connection so much love we were never disrespectin im glad i could atleast i could teach hersome shit before she ripped my beeating heart out of my chest and stepped on it. Loved hermore than life and i still do i promised her one day i would find her and marry her, walkher down that isle say the words ido, she felt what i felt i know its tru, wasnt ready fgor commitment baby i wil alwayslove yo never orget you if i can i connect with you, like a disease i infected you i aways broght you downi was just baggage extra wait holing you down dragging around im glad youo saw through my snake charming ways saw me for who i was a bumm who couldnt change noot in a short number of days, someone so crippled by pain and grief it was beyond belief, she was the only one i wore my heart on my sleeve for , she lef me sobbinig, crrying violently without end in the door the doorway to more pain. i know she had no choice she had to live her lifee i was just in he way, i was obscuring her focus. eye on the prize isthe only way to achieve your goals and tnt them fuckin boulders, in your way, today i die babe, long time comin bet yall thought i was here to stay. baby l dontshed a tear kno i died drinkin a beer haha but nah you were my last thoughts thinking about all the time we spent getting lost in eachothers eyes and gettin so close we read eachothers thougts, illl miss or idk if ill be concious or just nothjingness, i guess ill fnd out when i finally stop being a pussy and proced with this, see ya velma ill always be your shaggy thinka bout me and dont forget what i made you see, in your self im just another memory on our shelf but let it bbe one thaat sticks we had somethingthat made ssense just clicks somethin that felt so right im really gonn miss, everythinig abnout you im sorry you couldnt trust me but i dont doubt why. i know the truth ive never denied a thing in my life, dont getme wrong everybody tells a little white lie, but you know what its a sign of intelligence not to be afraid to say idk not to lie for the hll of it. Ill see you soon in the nxt life or two i hope reincarnatiuon has a possibility of being true, godbye cruel world th ride is over it was a hell of a whirl, i leave you with absolutely nohing conntributted i was just a part o the cancer people had to live with, butnever acknowledgedd, acted ignoant to ther surroundings as daddy paid for college, i burned bright and hot and had a lot of fun, i had alot of life experienc got alot of shit done, nothing productivee of course in ssocieties eyes but i did fullfill atleast some personal goals, important things in my eyes, the curtains are almost done descending as my pittiful life is ending, but keep your pitty mother  fuckers i dont want shit from any of you i dont give yoou nothin dont be so self righteous you look like a bunch of fools, greive for me or celebrate my life i guess its on you how you chhoose to rfemmeber a nobody that nobody knew, a couple feet before the curtains drop, is that? myy eyes decieving? me? no i do see that a single rose descends from the skies, i stare intently at the work of art, a rose is soo beautiful, a representation of love, from the heart, so delicate with its velvet petals, easily ruined a boket wouldve been nice, but who am i fooling, thats a beautiful thing, that was really nice. the product bubbles as i take my last hit of ice, cant takemy eyes off that rose.. its so beautiful... the gun on my forhead now, looking at each individual pedals.. dew from the early mornin forming a small puddle around that naturral phenom, that iconic organic, spectaacular symbol of sometthing real, somethin that matters, something sensual. 

As the bits of his brain splatter behid him, arms spread; with grace, almost angelic.he falls off the ciff a hundred feet now for falling, weird but there was a look of peace in his eyes; on his face, maybe he wll finally find happiness.. he fell with nobility and so much grace the floor he hit, his finall restingplace, what cuold be a better box then a natural setting, a  beaauty of nature, crawling all around and he will return to the earth, the mother wll  take him back just as she gave birth, i thinnk this shit is over now its not my story to tell, inside voices kids no reason to yell. shhhhhhhhhhh. 

dont depend dont believe the [enter here]