#goose giggle gaggle

[ratatatastic]

carolina hurricanes @ florida panthers | 11.30.24 (x)(x)

[theostrophywife]

stop the world i wanna get off with you.

pairing: theodore nott x reader. song inspiration: stop the world i wanna get off with you by arctic monkeys. author’s note: the theo brain rot is so real for me besties. i kid you not i listened to the song on repeat while writing this because my mans is arctic monkeys coded. plus, it was only a matter of time before we saw some smutty action from my favorite slutherin 😏 part one: baby won't you be my girl?

You were not a morning person. 

Theo knew that. Hell, everyone in Slytherin knew that. Waking you up before noon on the weekend was a one way ticket to a world of pain. For some reason, your boyfriend was determined to make the top of your hit list this morning. 

You groaned as Theo shifted beneath you, rousing you from sleep. He stroked your hair gently and pressed a kiss on your temple. “I have to go to practice, amorina.” 

Sunlight streamed in through the skylight above Theo’s dorm, reflecting the rippling waves of the Black Lake across your boyfriend’s goose down comforter. You buried your head in the crook of his neck. 

“Five more minutes,” you mumbled against his throat, relishing in his warmth. “Please, Teddy.”

A low chuckle rumbled through his chest. “You said that five minutes ago, sweetheart. Do you want your sweet and sexy boyfriend to be maimed by his captain?”

“If Malfoy so much as touches a hair on your head, I’ll turn him into a ferret again and set him loose in the Forbidden Forest.” You snuggled closer and twined your legs together. “Let’s see how threatening he can be against Aragog.”

“Sometimes you genuinely scare me, Y/N.” He wrapped his arms around your waist. “But apparently, fear is a very effective aphrodisiac for me. I’m learning a lot of new things about myself.”

“I can threaten you some more if you want,” you murmured sleepily. “As long as you stay in bed with me, Teddy.”

Theo groaned as you kissed his neck. “You’re absolutely cruel, you know that?” He tilted your chin up, pressing his lips against yours. You sighed dreamily into the kiss, morning breath and all. 

Even though you’ve only been officially dating for three months, it felt like you and Theo had been together for a lifetime. You were already inseparable before, but after his confession at the quidditch game after party, you spent nearly every waking moment together. Hence waking up in his bed. 

Theo placed a final kiss on the tip of your nose. “Now I really have to go.” You sighed in defeat, pouting like a petulant child. Your boyfriend laughed. “I’ll see you in the stands, babe.”

“Fine,” you mumbled grumpily. 

You watched as Theo hastily threw on his quidditch uniform, admiring the view of his sunkissed skin and toned chest and abs. Thank Merlin for quidditch. 

The cheeky tosser winked before heading for the pitch. You turned over in bed, burying yourself in Theo’s scent as you drifted back to sleep. 

Several hours later, you finally managed to get dressed and dragged yourself to the Great Hall for a late lunch. When you got to your usual table, you found the boys and Pansy waiting for you. Draco and Mattheo were talking in hushed tones, no doubt discussing their strategy to destroy the Ravenclaws while Enzo scarfed down a plate of steak and eggs like his life depended on it. Pansy watched in disgust, wrinkling her nose at your friend. 

“For Salazar’s sake, Lorenzo. You’re going to choke to death and I refuse to resuscitate you.”

“Don’t worry, Enzo,” you said as you slid in next to him. “I’m sure we can find a volunteer to perform mouth to mouth on you.”

As if on cue, a gaggle of fourth years giggled at the end of the table. Enzo didn’t seem to notice. Beside him, Blaise met your eye and shook his head. The two of you often joked that Draco took all the arrogance in their family’s gene pool, leaving poor Enzo hopelessly oblivious. The fact that sweet Lorenzo was related to someone as arrogant as Malfoy never failed to completely baffle the mind. 

“Well don’t you look adorable, Y/N?” Draco drawled. “All decked out in your boyfriend’s jersey.”

You looked down at the emerald and silver jersey with the number 6 embroidered on the front, which was so big on you that the hem hit your knees. Matching streaks of your house colors adorned your cheeks and you had pulled your hair back with a pair of charmed serpent clips that writhed through your pigtails every so often.

“And up before mid afternoon, no less,” Mattheo commented. 

You frowned, flicking him off before reaching for a sandwich. “Speaking of my boyfriend. Where is the little rascal?”

“Last I checked he was still on the pitch,” Draco said as you stuffed a few chips into your mouth. “Practicing to show off in front of you, I imagine.”

“I’ve seen him play before.” 

Mattheo stole a chip from your plate. “Yes, but not as his girlfriend.”

You smacked his hand away and he gasped dramatically. Mattheo fetched something out of his robes and set it down in front of you. The small glass vial shimmered in the light. 

“Your boyfriend wanted me to give you this.” 

A motion sickness draught. Theo knew how queasy and nauseous you got during his quidditch games, so he’d concocted your own special cure for it. Hot and smart. Gods, you were lucky.

You flushed, pocketing the potion. “Thanks.”

“You idiots better win,” Pansy said. “Or else all my hard work for tonight’s after party will go to waste.”

Draco scoffed. “You mean our hard work?” He turned over to you, frowning. “Pans over here had us working harder than a house elf. I’ve got glitter in places glitter should never be.”

“Fitting for someone who thinks the sun shines out of his arse. Maybe it’ll finally teach you some humility, Malfoy.”

Mattheo draped an arm around your shoulder. “You know why our sweet little Pansy’s got her wand in a twist though, right?” He leaned in conspiratorially. “She finally plucked up the courage to invite a certain Ravenclaw to the after party.”

You squealed in delight. “Is that true, Pans? Did you finally ask Luna out?”

Pansy glared at you, practically hissing as she grabbed your elbow. “Say that a little louder, why don’t you? I don’t think they heard you across the room.” 

You snorted. Your best friend has always been a little tightly wound, but Pansy Parkinson with a crush was a whole different animagus. 

“Well, I, for one, am excited for this development in your love life,” you exclaimed, squeezing her shoulder. “It’s about time you did something about this little crush.”

“Says the witch who took twelve years to admit her feelings,” Pansy said with an affectionate eye roll. “Sorry love, but I’m not taking advice from you.”

“I’m choosing to attribute that to first date jitters and not a blatant insult against your best and most loyal friend.” You picked at your sandwich, waving a pickle in the air excitedly. “Don’t be nervous, Pans. She’s going to love you.” 

The encouragement was met with an elbow to your ribs. You paused mid-chew, ready to give Pansy a peace of your mind when a soft voice interrupted you. 

“Hi, guys,” greeted Luna Lovegood. She wore a striped blue and bronze sweater, representing the colors of her house. Strapped to her back was a set of feathered eagle wings that nearly dragged to the floor. “I love your snake clips, Y/N. It’s always great to see displays of house spirit. Beware of the nargles, though. They do love shiny things.”

“I’ll keep an eye out for them, Luna.” You said with a smile. “I’m looking forward to your commentary tonight. It’s going to be a heated match between our houses, but one thing’s for certain. The after party will be absolutely mental no matter who wins. Isn’t that right, Pans?” 

Pansy nodded, the action making her sleek bob graze her sharp cheekbones. You always thought that your friend possessed an austere sort of beauty, but everything about her seemed to soften as she turned her attention on Luna. 

“We can still count on you to make it tonight, right Lovegood?” There was a hint of playfulness in Pansy’s tone that you rarely heard her use. You couldn’t help but smirk. Pansy Parkinson fancied the absolute pants out of Luna Lovegood.

Luna smiled shyly, hiding beneath a strand of platinum blonde hair. “Thank you for the invitation, Pansy. I look forward to seeing everyone tonight.” 

“See you tonight, Luna.”

Luna gave your table a friendly wave before returning to her own fellow Ravenclaws. You waited until she was out of ear shot before bursting into a fit of giggles.

“See you tonight Luna,” you repeated, putting on your best impression of Pansy’s husky voice. “Pansy Parkinson’s totally going to snog Luna Lovegood tonight!” 

“Oh, shut up,” replied Pansy. She tried her best to look annoyed, but the small smile on her face made it rather unconvincing. 

After teasing your friend for at least another hour, the two of you finally headed down to the quidditch pitch. The boys left long ago, presumably to warm up before the big game. You followed Pansy into the stands, cringing slightly at how high up the seats were. 

Across the pitch, the feedback from Luna’s sonoroused voice rumbled through the crowd. “Welcome fellow students. Join me in kicking off this long awaited match between Slytherin and Ravenclaw, the house of yours truly. As always, the goal is to provide live updates and unbiased commentary throughout the game, but I make no promises. Even a Corkendoodle wouldn’t be able to resist showing a little partiality. Now without further ado, let the games begin!”

The crowd roared as players from each side soared through the air at breakneck speed. You gripped the railing, thankful for Theo’s concoction as you squinted at the blur of players. As always, Madam Hooch kicked off the game by releasing a set of bludgers and the elusive golden snitch. With bated breath, you watched as she threw the quaffle into the air which marked the official start of the match. 

A familiar figure zoomed past you, emerald robes streaming behind him as he caught the quaffle and cradled it under his arm. Theo circled through the air, easily outmaneuvering the chasers from the opposing team. He flew straight for a blonde Ravenclaw, making the poor fifth year think that they were going to collide before he swerved at the last second and looped around the frightened player. 

“And that’s Nott of Slytherin with an excellent fake out,” Luna announced in her dreamy voice. “Oddly enough, this chaser is heading in the opposite direction of the goalposts. Another clever tactic, I presume.”

Theo brought his broom to a stop directly in front of you, hovering in mid-air while he cradled the quaffle underneath one arm. He immediately broke out into a grin when he saw you wearing his jersey. 

“In a turn of events, Nott visits the Slytherin stands for a little chat with his friends,” commented Luna. “Actually, that’s his lovely girlfriend Y/N. I did warn her about attracting the Nargles, but nevertheless those serpent clips are a work of art. Oh look, there’s Pansy Parkinson! I know she looks a bit intimidating at first, but she’s really quite nice.” 

Beside you, Pansy turned as red as a tomato. You stifled a giggle just as Theo pulled close, his watercolor eyes crinkling with amusement. 

“My jersey looks good on you, Y/N.” Theo drawled, taking the time to flirt despite the fact that he was currently in the middle of a game. He leaned in and whispered low so only you could hear, “But I bet it would look even better on my floor.”

“Win this match and you might get your wish, babe.”

A smirk curved against his lips. “You evil little temptress. I hope you know that I’m holding you to that,” he inched closer, his gaze dropping to your mouth. “Do I at least get a kiss from my good luck charm?”

You shook your head in disbelief. “Aren’t you supposed to be doing something right now? Like, I don't know, playing the bloody quidditch game!”

He shrugged, winking at you in that cheeky way of his. “I’m perfectly capable of multitasking.” 

Just then, a bludger whizzed past the stands, but Theo was entirely unbothered as he flipped over on his broom to avoid the hit. Your boyfriend hung upside down, keeping his eyes on you the entire time. “Now about that kiss, dolcezza.”

“That’s quite a creative way to avoid a bludger,” Luna continued. “I once hung upside down in a tree in search of moon frogs and it wasn’t the most comfortable position, but not the most uncomfortable either. Oh! It looks like things are heating up for this lovely couple.”

“You’re an absolute menace, Theodore,” you said with an exasperated sigh before pulling him by the collar and kissing him. The logistics were complicated by the fact that he was currently airborne, but Theo smiled against your lips all the same. 

“A good luck kiss,” Luna said with delight. “Those two are absolutely adorable, aren’t they? Ah, young love.”

Satisfied, Theo flipped right side up and palmed the quaffle in his hand. “You hear that, babe? We’re absolutely adorable.”

You rolled your eyes affectionately. “Yeah, yeah. Now go out there and kick some Ravenclaw arse!”

Thanks to Teddy’s potion, you actually managed to keep your eyes open for the entirety of the game. It was a heated match with both teams playing with equal ferocity, but the boys had the upper hand. They moved as one, predicting each other’s moves from years and years of practice. Even the newest additions, Violet and Tracey, seemed to fit seamlessly into the group. 

By the time you reached the tail end of the game, your throat felt raw from cheering and screaming. Pansy was in a worse state, hurling insults when one of the Ravenclaw beaters attempted to grab the tail end of Blaise’s broom. 

“That was obviously a bloody fucking foul!” Pansy screamed. 

“Some colorful words from the Slytherin stands,” Luna said with a little smile, making Pansy blush. “Madam Hooch seems to agree. Robinson has been fouled for blagging Zabini.”

You gripped the end of the railing as Theo zoomed past. The score was tied, but if he made this goal it would put Slytherin up by ten points, effectively winning not only the game but also the Quidditch Cup.

“You got this, babe,” you yelled. “No mercy, Teddy!”

Theo met your gaze and smirked. Vicious woman, he mouthed before careening straight for the goalpost. 

The Ravenclaw keeper looked panicked as Theo dodged the other players and reeled the quaffle back. The shot was perfect, whizzing past the post so fast that the keeper didn’t even have time to react. 

“Nott with the winning shot!” Luna announced cheerily. “That’s game, everyone. Congratulations to this year’s Quidditch Cup winner: Slytherin House!”

The cheers that erupted from your housemates followed you all the way to the common room. In true Pansy fashion, the large space had been meticulously decorated with banners and streamers. The music blared and the liquor flowed, marking the start of a night of mischief and revelry. 

While waiting for the boys to finish showering, you helped Pansy play hostess. You greeted friends from other houses, filling their cups with your signature concoction. A fruity drink that masked the taste of liquor so well that the drinker didn’t realize they were pissed until it was too late. 

“Congratulations on the win,” said a familiar voice. You turned around and saw Murdock raising his green cup in a toast. 

You smiled, clinking your plastic cup against his. “Thanks Christoph. Good to see you here,” you lowered your voice, darting your head around the corner. “So things are going well with Daphne?”

Christoph smiled shyly. “Yeah, thanks for introducing us by the way. We’re going on our first date to the Three Broomsticks tomorrow.” 

After his last disastrous attendance at a Slytherin party, you figured it was the least you could do for your Hufflepuff friend. “Don’t mention it, Christoph. What are friends for? Besides, it’s obvious that you two would be absolutely perfect together.” 

“Who’s absolutely perfect together?” A familiar voice drawled. You felt an arm wrap protectively around you. “Besides us, of course.” 

Even before you were dating, Theo had a tendency to be overprotective towards you. Most of the time he was pretty good at controlling it, but sometimes his jealousy got the best of him. It would’ve annoyed you if it wasn’t so damn attractive. 

“Hey babe,” you said with a little smile, leaning up to kiss his cheek. “I was just telling Christoph here that he should offer Daphne a drink. They’d make a cute couple, don’t you think?”

Realization flooded Theo’s features, followed by a hint of embarrassment. “Definitely,” he said with a rueful smile. “Take it from me, mate. Don’t wait too long before chasing after the girl of your dreams.”

Christoph nodded, looking determined. “Thanks, mate.”

You handed your friend another cup and pointed him in Daphne’s direction. Beside you, Theo smiled sheepishly. His hair was slightly wet from the shower and he smelled like sea salt spray and smoke. The cozy knitted sweater he had thrown on brought out his watercolor eyes. 

“Nice save, babe.” 

“What can I say? I’m a hopeless romantic,” Theo said, placing his hands on your waist. “You bring it out of me, cara mia.”

You rolled your eyes fondly. “You know, I’d be mad if jealous Theo wasn’t so hot.” Theo grinned as you placed your arms around his neck. “But scoring that winning goal? That was downright sexy.”

Your boyfriend toyed with the hem of your shirt. “Oh yeah? Well, I had some motivation, thanks to our little bargain.” His hands slipped underneath your shirt, tracing teasing circles on your hips. “I delivered on my end. Now it’s time for you to pay up, love.” 

“Good things come to those who wait, Theo.” 

Theo pouted. “Fine, but only because I know you’re worth it.”

You pulled Theo in by the belt loop and kissed him, long and hard. He lifted you up and groaned as you tugged at his curls. Theo sighed into your mouth as you took control, showing him exactly how much you wanted him. You topped the kiss off by gently biting on his bottom lip. When you pulled away, Theo looked dazed. 

“Fuck,” he said in a low, dark voice. 

“A little preview,” you said with a smirk. “Just so you don’t think I’m completely heartless.”

“So my dorm or yours?”

You chuckled. “Theo, you haven’t even made your rounds. This party is to celebrate your win, you know.”

“Fuck the party,” he said dismissively. “You think I care about talking to all of these people after that? What do you want, love? Do you want me to beg? Get on my knees for you? I’ll do anything, princess.”

Salazar fucking save you. 

You would’ve taken Theo up on the offer, but this was his moment. He deserved to be celebrated. Besides, he’d be all yours by the end of the night. 

“As much as I love the visual,” you said, pecking him on the cheek. “I want you to celebrate with the team. You lot deserve it after working so hard all year.” You lowered your voice, whispering in his ear. “After that, we can go up to your dorm and I’ll give you your reward. Think you can do that, babe?”

“Yes ma’am,” Theo replied. “God you’re fucking sexy when you’re bossing me around.” 

You smirked. “Good boy.” 

Theo groaned before slipping his hand into yours. “Now come on, before I change my mind and claim my reward right here, right now.”

The two of you made rounds through the party, stopping here and there to talk to your respective friends. Most of the time, you were by Theo’s side watching in admiration as everyone congratulated him on the winning goal. 

Even in deep conversation, Theo never stopped touching you. Whether it was the soothing rub of his thumb across your knuckles or his arm draped protectively around your waist, it was obvious that physical touch was your boyfriend’s love language. 

You couldn’t help but smile at how easy it came to him, like touching you was as natural as breathing air.�� 

“What’s that smile for, love?”

“I just really fucking fancy you.”

Merlin’s bloody beard. The smile on Theo’s face completely took your breath away. His eyes, which you often joked gave him resting witch face, lit up brighter than the sun. 

“I really fucking fancy you too, darling.”

Finally, the two of you reached your friends on the other side of the common room. Blaise and Enzo were engaged in a competitive game of beer pong against Mattheo and Draco. 

“The man of the hour,” Malfoy announced, clapping Theo on the back. “You fucking killed it out there, mate.” He turned back to the other boys. “We all did.”

“This calls for a celebratory shot!” you announced. “Wait, where’s Pans?”

Mattheo smirked. “Chatting up our commentator. Looks like our little Pansy’s all grown up.”

Across the room, you shot Pansy a wink as she and Luna sat rather close together, huddled on the couch and giggling every so often. You rallied the boys, raising your cups in a cheer. Pansy affectionately flipped you the bird as all six of you hooted and hollered, but she downed the liquor nonetheless. 

The firewhisky must have been a fast acting agent of liquid courage because not even a second after she set her cup down, Pansy was kissing Luna. You squealed in delight while the rest of the group drunkenly cheered. 

This night just kept getting better and better. 

“Another one of our finest lost to young love,” Draco announced dramatically. 

You rolled your eyes. “You could be too if you stopped being a coward and finally asked Hermione out.” 

Malfoy nearly spat out his drink. “Granger? You think I fancy Granger? Little miss know it all, member of the Golden Trio, poster child Gryffindor Granger? Are you taking the piss, Y/N?”

“Oh please,” Mattheo said with a scoff. “We all see the way you look at her in the Great Hall. You don’t just fancy Granger. You’re absolutely smitten, mate.”

Enzo nodded empathetically. “Mattheo’s right, cousin. You should just ask Hermione out on a date.”

“Have you lot forgotten that the madwoman once punched me in the face?” 

“I think she’d be good for you,” you said. “Set you straight.” 

“Set me straight?” Draco repeated. “I don’t need anyone to set me straight. Especially not Granger. I mean, the witch is insufferable with her stupid curly hair and stupid big brown eyes and stupid flawless skin.” 

Blaise sighed. “No offense, mate, but you’re even thicker than Enzo when it comes to girls.”

Enzo protested in response, but Draco was too busy having a meltdown to notice. His pale complexion blossomed with red as his mouth gaped open. “Do I like Granger?” 

You rolled your eyes. “Obviously, you blubbering idiot.” 

Draco glared at you, then at Theo. “Nott, please get your girlfriend away from me before I have a full on fit.”

Theo only laughed, pulling you closer. “Gladly. We were heading out anyway.” 

You hugged your friends goodbye. Draco was still frowning at his drink when you and Theo finally headed out of the common room. 

“Think about it, ferret boy,” you hollered from the door. “Granger’s a catch! We could use more female presence in this absolute sausage party of a friend group.” 

With that, Theo hauled you over his shoulder. You squealed, pinching his bum as he carried you out of the common room. “Alright, love. That’s enough of that.” 

When you finally reached Theo’s dorm, the two of you fell over in absolute hysterics. You plopped down on his bed, spreading like an obnoxious starfish. Theo followed after, diving on top of you. 

“I think you gave Malfoy an identity crisis,” he said, laughing into your hair. 

You shrugged, rolling over so that you were on top of him. “He deserved it.” 

Theo toyed with the hem of your shirt, tracing circles on your hips. “And what about what I deserve?” 

“It’s coming, babe,” you said with a sly smile. “And pretty soon you will be too.”

“Don’t tease, cara mia.”

“I never tease,” you purred. “I only promise.”

With a satisfied smirk, you pressed your lips against his. Theo groaned into your mouth as you straddled his lap, deepening the kiss. Large hands roamed underneath your shirt, his palms rough and calloused from hours and hours of playing quidditch.

A sinfully delicious moan slipped past Theo’s lips as you trailed kisses along his jaw, throat, and neck. You sucked on his flesh, hard enough to leave marks. You liked knowing that every time he changed, little reminders of you littered his skin.

“Bloody fucking hell,” Theo muttered.

“You’ve got a filthy mouth, Theo,” you teased. “I bet I could shut you up though.”

Your boyfriend groaned like he was in pain. “Please do.”

You winked before disappearing underneath the covers. Theo’s eyes fluttered close as you continued kissing down his chest, taking the time to trace your name on his abs with your tongue, which seemed to be a real crowd pleaser. You stripped off his trousers, kissing his perfectly defined v line before licking a teasing stripe along the underside of his cock.

“Figlio di puttana,” Theo cursed, low and rough. Your knees nearly buckled. There was truly nothing hotter than your boyfriend swearing in Italian. “Don’t stop, Y/N.”

“What was that you said about delivering on my promise?” you asked innocently, looking up at him through your lashes. “Because it feels like I’m giving you the winner treatment right now, doesn’t it baby?”

A choked moan was your only response as you took him into your mouth. You gagged as he hit the back of your throat, bobbing your head up and down in a steady rhythm. Theo fisted your hair in his hands, watching through heavy lids as you sucked your cheeks in. 

“You’re going to be the death of me,” he groaned, stroking your cheek. “But I’m willing to die a happy man.”

You chuckled, sending vibrations to his sensitive head. Theo twitched against your cheek as you gripped his shaft, moving along with your mouth. He continued to curse colorfully while you wrapped your lips around him. You felt him tense underneath you, signaling that he was close. 

Theo tugged lightly at your scalp. “I don’t want to cum yet,” he said huskily. “Not until I’m inside of you.” 

Merlin bless your boyfriend and his filthy fucking mouth. Theo flipped you over, his body pinning you to the mattress as he kissed you roughly. You gasped against his mouth, giving him the perfect opportunity to slide his tongue in. Heat pooled in your core and flooded your body with desire. 

“Theo,” you mumbled, tugging at his shirt. “I need you. Now.” 

He ripped off his shirt, grinning. “Then have me, darling.” 

“I want to be on top.” 

You squealed as Theo rolled over, placing you on his lap. He gripped your hips and gently rolled against you. “I’m not about to argue with that.”

With a smirk, you toyed with the hem of your shirt. Theo grabbed your wrist and shook his head. “Keep it on. I want to watch you ride me while wearing my jersey.”

“Have I ever told you how much I love your filthy mouth?” 

Theo grinned before latching his lips on your breast. He looked up at you and swirled his tongue around your nipple through the fabric. “It’s not ringing a bell. Shall I try the other side?” 

“Gods, yes.” 

He gave your other nipple equal attention as you lined his cock up at your entrance. Precum coated his tip, mixing with your own slick as you slowly lowered onto his length. Theo’s teeth sank into your collarbone, muffling his moan. 

“Fuck me,” he exhaled in a shaky breath. 

“I am, baby.”

Theo chuckled darkly. “Smartass.”

You rolled your hips as he gripped your ass, helping you lift and lower at a faster pace. Theo’s mouth collided with yours, his hands roaming underneath your shirt and exploring every inch of you like he was trying to commit your body to memory. 

The intensity of his gaze pierced you with lust and desire. He lifted the hem of his jersey, watching as his cock disappeared between your folds. 

“I love watching you take all of me, pretty girl.” Theo was ravenous, littering your neck and shoulder with love bites. “You ride me so fucking well. Maybe it should be you out there on the broom.” 

“The only broom I’m interested in is yours,” you quipped back. “Besides, you don’t want everyone else knowing my tricks, do you?”

“Fuck no,” Theo whispered roughly as he switched positions. He pressed you against the mattress, hooking your legs on his shoulder before smirking. “This is for my eyes only. You’re mine, amorina.” 

“Yours,” you breathed as he thrust into you. The angle allowed him to slide in even deeper, hitting all the right spots as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. 

“That’s my good girl,” Theo declared proudly. “Now fucking take it.”

The pleasure hits you in waves. The sounds that you were both making were absolutely filthy, and you were glad that music was playing in the common room below otherwise the whole of Slytherin house would’ve heard you screaming Theo’s name. 

“You getting close, baby?” Theo grunted as you fluttered around him. You whimpered in response, raking your nails along his back. “I’ll take that as a yes. I want you to cum with me. Can you do that, pretty girl?”

You nodded as Theo’s slender fingers rubbed against your clit, pushing you over the edge. You wrapped your legs around his waist and pulled him closer, cursing as the orgasm hit you both. 

Theo kissed you, swallowing your moans of pleasure as euphoria washed over you. He rode it out, hips stuttering as he finished. The two of you laid in the dark, bodies twined together while your heartbeats synced. 

“Holy fuck,” you said in disbelief. 

Theo chuckled. “That did feel a bit sacrilegious.” 

He rolled over and grabbed his wand, casting a quick scouring charm over the both of you. Thank Merlin for magic.

You rolled over, propping your chin up with one hand. “You want to smoke a cigarette, don’t you?”

Your boyfriend shook his head. “Actually, I was thinking about quitting.” 

Now this was news to you. “Oh? Has all my nagging finally paid off?” 

“Maybe,” he said, shrugging. “I’m just thinking ahead. I don’t want our kids picking up the habit.”

Your eyes widened. “Kids? As in, plural?”

Theo nodded emphatically. “Oh yeah, little Theo Jr. and his brother Mattheo don’t need to be exposed to my smoking.” 

You cocked your head in confusion. “Theo Jr.? Mattheo?”

“Don’t ask. I lost a bet.”

“You better be taking the piss, Teddy.”

He chuckled. “Mostly. I am quitting smoking and I am looking forward to a future with you, our hypothetical children’s names to be further discussed.” 

“You absolute menace of a man,” you said, cuddling him with a wide grin. “I fucking adore you, do you know that?”

“I am stupidly in love with you.” 

You giggled as Theo peppered kisses on your face. “Malfoy’s right. We’re truly revolting.”

“Oh, absolutely vile.” 

Theo tucked you into the crook of his neck and kissed the top of your head. “I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you mumbled sleepily. “I love you, Teddy.”

He pulled you close and smiled. “I love you too, Y/N.”

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[maplecinnamonbun]

silly goose? sister, i’m the entire giggle gaggle

[samcaru]

@sadtransboidyell

Brain not empty , brain full of worms

But there is also a bird in there trying to eat the worms

And that's where the thoughts go when I forget

Sacrificed to the brain Fowl

Hjönk Hjönk

[fanaticsnail]

"(Hongo) for Kissing Booth please"

Hello Snail 😘

I really like this idea of Kissing Booth 😍😍

You’re great, have a nice day 💖💖

The Kissing Booth: Hongo for Akagami-no-Laney

Word Count: 800+

Notes: Hongo is such a delight to write for. This has given me a chance to explore what he'd be like in the request you've submitted for me, Laney! Now, come and get smooched by your doctor!

A loud rambunctious gaggle of barked laughter eclipsed the sweet song played by the musicians. The melody was half-sung, half-shouted by the misfits in front of you. You shook your head, rolling your eyes beneath your blinding shroud as you turned your head away from them with a soft pout. 

The group seemed to ignore you, their voices lifting all the higher and crying out in harmony the song currently played aloud. Interlacing your arms in disdain, you tapped at your bicep with your index finger and gently counted down the seconds until your shift at the booth were to come to a close. 

Just as the troop began to echo their voices away from you, you heard the soft crackle of Berry being placed into the glass jar beside you. You leaned your head towards the sound before upturning your chin to a potential guest. 

“I don't want anything' from you or nothin’,” the masculine voice whispered down at you, “Just thought I'd apologize for the singin’. Our first mate usually keeps ‘em in line, but he's off resupplying the ship before joinin’ us here.” You offer him a soft smile and a nod in response. 

“I see,” your humming voice taunts up at him, “And you're not the type to join in on the merriment?” 

“I join in just fine,” he scoffs at you, his foot gently colliding with the unoccupied barstool in response, “Just thought I'd offer you compensation for my captain’s horrible singin' voice.” You giggle at his confession, his own voice chuckling in response. You lull your head to the side towards the jar, gently gesturing with your chin down at it. 

“If you've given me Berry, you're entitled to a kiss should you like one,” you nod towards the stool, the shroud over your eyes halting your ability to get a read on the person granting you their Berry and apologies. 

“I-... uh-...” he began, stuttering over his words before taking a moment to consider your suggestion, “...I suppose one kiss wouldn't exactly hurt.” He chuckled, sitting down on the stool opposite to you and lacing one of his knees between yours opposite his. 

“So I just-...” he gently brushes his hand over your forearm and traces it up towards your chin, “I just kiss you? Just like that?” You shake your head with a soft giggle as you feel him shift all the closer. 

“Just like that,” you confirm with a soft nod, “Nothing more to it than your lips and mine.” You heard a subtle scoff in his hum in response. His body shifted closer, the shuffle of fabrics and the legs of the stool scuffing the floor had your ears pricking up in response.

His breath whispered over your jaw, your body involuntarily shifting up to reveal more of your skin to him. A soft press of his lips brushed over the bone before slowly tracing up towards your cheek. The trail left behind by soft and subtle kisses left the rise of goose flesh at the back of your neck, the anticipation of what his lips would feel like atop your own igniting a spark within you.

Turning your head towards him, you immediately collect his lips with your own. His smile was the first thing you felt on your lips, a soft trace of subtle joy in his apprehensive kiss. He parted his lips, coaxing you to open more of yourself up to him by angling his chin and turning his face. 

The brush of his tongue softly swirled at your lower lip as one hand rested securely on your shoulder, and the other moved to cup your face. His thumb teased at the outer corner of the blindfold, prompting you to retract a little from his lips and raise your hands up to tug it down. 

Chuckling into your lips, he pressed one more lengthy hum against you before retreating from you entirely. His lips left a lingering tingle against your own, feeling your breath had been all but taken from you by his skillful kiss. 

“If you feel like you want more from me at the end of your shift,” he chuckled, gently caressing your cheek before rising to his feet, “Follow the redhead with the horrible singin' voice. He’s likely to not let up anytime soon.”

You giggle in response, raising your hand gently up to squeeze his in response. 

“I’ll find you,” you smile in his direction, feeling his lips gently descend and find purchase against your forehead. He turned away from you, wandering off to find the horrid musings and drunken jig several members of the crew were partaking in while encouraging the band to play louder. 

Hongo should’ve been more miserable at his crew’s juvenile attitude, but all he could think about was you lips on his, and how much he wanted to taste you on him once more.

[voidselfshipp]

Star-Crossed (or not so much)

Cw: none that im aware.

Summary: A date between Jerico (a Half-Blood) and Amos (A magician of the house of life) leads to divine intervention.

A/n: pshhht @tex-treasures IIRC you were into PJO. I figured I'd share this with you!!

Above them the ceiling projected stars and consentellations. Its a beautiful show of lights and technology to replicate the night Sky the city few times saw glimmering in all its splendour.

But Amos isnt watching the show,no. His beautiful brown eyes,deep as an endless cup of coffee,melted its gazes to admire the godly Beauty of his partner.

Jerico,Child of Hephastus,leader of cabin 09. They who are the favored child of the god of forges.  He melted like metal in their presence,he poured himself in their embrace in hopes to have them engraved in his self when they leave for camp and their heat no longer graces his being.

He sighs in love with his lips curling in a smile. All the stars in the world, and he is still looking at them.

They lean back on the theatre-esque chair, arms on the backrest and their legs crossed. Irreverent,sweet and rebelious,he loves them so dearly for it. In that iconic way to go about the world, they wear a black overall, torn to shreds and mended witt colorful patches,embroidery floss stitches and absolutely stained in paint.

Heavy boots cover their feet. Multiple,intricate jewelry pieces adorn their neck and hair that is tied up in a bun. Gold and brown mix beautifully, and a few hairs brush against the shaved back of their neck.

It burns his heart that their love is forbidden. Like Geb and Nut, or Pyramus and Thisbe.

Jerico is unaware of his longing pondering, they look up at the show and ask-- hey,what constellations can be seen from Egypt?

--Orion,Leo...then,of course,there are egyptian constellations-- he fixed his posture so he can lean closer to them. His arm goes around their shoulders and brings them to his side over the armrest-- Sah,Sepedet..Meskhetyu..

They Hummed in surprise,pressing against him and taking in his scent of amber,well Dryed herbs and his cologne. -- I wish I could see them sometime.

With a heavy heart, he kisses the side of their head--One day,my dear. One day-- He promised.

Greeks and Egyptians, Mages and Half-bloods... They could never mix. So it was written, to Keep the pantheons separate.

Its such hypocrisy, Both mythos had stories of forbidden lovers. Why did they need to bring it into modernity? He only wanted to love his partner freely, and not be scared of getting either of them in trouble.

The show came to an end and the rest of the audience left. Jerico grabbed their things and took the hand to their lover-- honey?

Amos snapped from his trance and looked up. He smiled and got up-- Yes,sorry. I was thinking.

--Anything interesting?--They asked with a grin.

He chuckled-- nothing of the sort,sadly.

They blew a rasperry,all playful like-- ah Man,shame.

Both exit out of the planetarium Galileo Galilei and into the park. Jeri's eyes go bright and filled with stars at the sight of the gooses in the pond. --Amos look at them!--They tug on his arm and hand like an excited child.

--Lets go look at them,then-- He offered with a grin. Its so good to see them happy.

Down to the pond they go. Jeri kneels to reach their hand out to one of the gooses-- These are the days where I wish I was a child of artemis. I love animals...

He chuckled--I May have something to remedy that--he mutters something and from his pocket he takes out a handfull of seeds. He drops them on his lover's outstretched Palms and like moths to a flame, a gaggle of geese approach and lovingly eat from the morsels offered.

They let out this joyful giggle,and Amos simply strokes their Lower back with a smile. Right now,he could make-believe they were a normal couple.

Above them the sweet spring afternoon kept them warm, with a gentle breeze to ease the heat when it became too much. People come and go,but they pay the pair no mind.

Mages and Half-bloods alike had a way to go unheeded by passerbys.

--I had this idea that geeses werent exactly friendy--they comment as they dust off their Palms from the remainer of the crumbs. They sit on the gravelly shore and their boyfriend follows along.

--Animals tend to distinguish good and bad people-- he turns to them,taking the opportunity to be a flirt-- and with a heart like yours its no surprise either.

Their face blooms in reds and pinks. They chuckle and dismiss him with a hand gesture-- Smooth.

He leaned in to press a gentle kiss on their cheek-- Any day,my dear-- He fixes the brim of his fedora and shakes off his trenchcoat. Then,he feels his lover lean on him.

Gentle fingers brush against the brim of the sleeve of their t-shirt tanktop they wear under the overall. His warm hand finds rest on their bicep,and he feels their smoldering warmth.

Out of habit,he cuddles closer,and his eyes fall half-closed underneath his round glasses.

Brief silence falls,hes unaware of the gears turning within his lover's mind.

They sigh as a first indicator of troubled thoughts, before they add--Hey,A? --He hummed to let them know hes listening-- Do you ever wish we were just..both humans?

--...sometimes-- He drawled with his american accent--Sometimes,when my beds too cold and I long to hold you and wake up to you-- He admitted,pressing against them-- But then I remember the shows I put on for you with my magic,that divinity that is so weaved into your soul. And I then wish to never have you lose that part,or any part for that matter,of you. I wish you to be wholly you.

They smiled and feel their eyes push forward tears that never fall. They chuckle and say-- Your romaticism makes me even more In love with you.

He lets out a short,soft laugh-- love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds-- He quoted,his grip on his lover tightening--Or bends with the remover to remove.

O no, it is an ever-fixed mark

That looks on tempests and is never shaken

Always remebering everything, he knows their favorite poems by heart. But they know why he decided to quote that one.

Their love is never going to be broken,true love like this is never broken by rules or impediments. Even if hidden as their relationshipp is, breaking up is not an option and it Will never be.

Few minutes pass by before he gets up and offers his hand. He flashes a loving,dashing smile to his lover who melts under such display. They take his hand and get on their feet with the aid of their boyfriend.

Both go to Grab coffee at a store nearby. Its cozy,and comfortable. They sit on a lowlit booth and order.

Amos had long since perfected his spanish,he had no accent-Except for the bits of soft Argentine that began to appear the longer he dated Jerico. He ordered for himself and their lover,and the waiter left soon after.

Their chats were always fun,they bounced off of eachother with ease as lovers often do. His eyes cant stop staring at their green ones, he wishes to look at them forever.

He takes their hand,his thumb stroking their knuckles. His eyes fall on the New bead bracelet around the hand hes holding and says-- That one's New.

Jerico smiled-- Right,forgot to tell you-- their free hand pushed the bracelet closer to their palm-- We had a scavenger hunt, my cabin came in second. Of course,Athena's kids found all of the treasures first. But Chiron and Mr.D made these for us as compensation

--Its amethyst and gold-- He pointed out-- Huh...

--Yeah,they're meant to grow and shrink to the size of the wearer-- They quickly take it off and put it on the magician's wrist--Here, Keep it.

His eyes widened, his face darkens. He knew hephastus' kids were stubborn. He could only smile and take their left hand,still covered in bead bracelets. He cups their palm with both of his hands and kisses their knuckles with devotion-- thank you,My sun.

They grin-- Something to Keep me close.

Soon their food arrive,and their chat resumes. Their conversations range from the every day to the deeply sentimental. Its always good fun either way,and both just spend the afternoon together like this.

Eventually the sun begins to set, and Amos takes Jerico to Puerto Madero where he summons his boat. Both hop in and in a matter of seconds they travel through the Duat back to the US where both could go their separate ways.

Though Amos knew to stay away,he knew he couldnt exactly leave them away from camp. So,their boat emerges in the city of Montauk. Far away enough that they go unnoticed.

Sun began to set on the horizon as the clock struck 6 p.m. Jerico doesnt want to leave,they want- Need to stay with their beloved.

He sighs knowing that conflicted look in their eyes. He pulls them in by the waist for a passionate kiss,long and filled with Yearning. Kissing Amos was like that improv jazz he liked so much.

Wild enough to Keep you on your toes,balanced with smoothness to soothe your soul. One hand cups their cheek,the other rests on their backpocket of their overall. Both rock side to side,and he melts further against them.

Jerico's kisses were shy,seeing as they are the less experienced one. But their sweetnes was unparalleled. Kissing them was like standing by a roaring forge, with a heat that leaves you breathless,and puts in your hands melting gold of unparalleled price.

Parting from them is like dying from hypothermia.

And he died a little every time their dates ended.

He pulled them close,lingering in the kiss for a little longer. He doesnt want to let go. By the gods,dont let this end.

--Must you leave?--He whispered when his breath was scarce.

--Ill stay with you if you only asked.

He sighed against their lips--I love you,but I dont want you to get into trouble for my foolish heart.

--Amos your heart could never be foolish--They began with such love and fear that their beloved saw himself as less.

--My heart wants you to be safe,and stay away from problems. Things you cant think your way out of. Go home,baby.

Above them the night began to push forward the moon. The River they were in was glimmering silver,and both lovers stood in its light knowing that the moon was no stranger to forbidden lovers.

--it just feels like...if I leave you..--Jer began-- My heart might shatter the moment I step out of this boat.

He squeezes them--Theres nothing I want more than for you to come to my home here in New York,and have dinner with me. --He said just so they knew he felt the same and was just as conflicted as they were-- But if we want to be able to see eachother you cant stay with me.

Jerico deinflated in his arm,they want to cry but the tears dont come as much as they want them to--...Can I stay at your place another day?

Amos nodded--We can work something out,Talk to Eden and we'll figure it out.

Eden,their satyr companion,protector and best friend, was their co-hort in this forbidden affair. She always made sure their dates could happen. She wanted nothing more than for her charge,her best friend,to be happy with such a wonderful Man.

--...fffine--They huffed,pulling away. --Fine. Alright-- he gives them one last kiss before helping them out of the boat.

--Here...--He took off his glasses and folded them within one of the pockets of their overalls--Something to Keep me close.-- the smile they give him outshines the moon.

And he watches them leave with one last yearning,mournful look. He sees them turn to meet his beautiful brown eyes once more before fully taking off to camp.

He stays on the boat until he gets a text that they made it home. Then,he leaves before hes caught.

-♡-

Jerico entered the barrier of the camp,it wooshes with energy and there stands Eden on the other side. The punk satyr smiles and says-- How was it?

They grin--Wonderful,as always-- they feel for their phone and adds-- gimme a sec.

After sending a quick "I got home" text to their lover,they return to the cabin area with their friend. In hushed tones and giggles they re-tell the great day they had.

The child of hephastus is left to return to their cabin,greeting their siblings with hugs and kisses before going to their bed and drawing the curtains that helped cover their top bunk.

Putting on their headphones, they lay on their side and Keep their bag near. They find a song, and listen to it with the volume on full Blast.

《Do you think I'd give up

That this might've shook the love from me

Or that I was on the brink?

How could you think, darling, I'd scare so easily?

Now that it's done

There's not one thing that I would change

My life was a storm, since I was born

How could I fear any hurricane?》

Meanwhile,Amos gets home to his apartment in New York. He takes off his shoes and smiles as Amunet,his black cat, awaits patiently on the bar-like table between his livingroom and kitchen.

He scratches underneath the old feline's ear and then underneath her long,elegant snout--Hello,honey--He said softly-- how was your day?

The cat purred and went to sniff the bead bracelet. She doesnt seem bothered by the greek magic scent it carries and licks it.

--Yeah,thats from them-- he said with a sad smile-- They'd love you,im sure of it.-- he made a short pause, hoping hes lucky enough to see them again soon-- Ill make us dinner,yeah?

The cats ears twitch and she purrs louder. Well,theres his answer.

Before getting to bussiness, he gets into some comfortable clothes. A simple T-shirt with the logo of the Lakers,some comfortable,fuzzy sweatpants and loafers.

He puts on the radio as he cleans his hands and thinks of something to eat. Usually, he would have Khufu help him decide,but the baboon is house-sitting the 21st nome.

Amos has been coming here when he wanted to live a normal,mortal life. Usually,he does it on the weeks he sees his lover. He could sneak them in this house,but he has yet to figure out how to change the barriers of the 21st Nome,his family house, for greek divinity to come in.

There were no instructions on how to do it, nobody has thought of such a thing. And as far as he knows,no magician has Fallen in love with a half-blood before. He didnt know where to start.

But he Will figure something out. For his love,he Will.

-- That is a beautiful sentiment-- came the voice of a woman.

He turns behind him, suddenly his home gone and replaced with an endless field of reeds. He sees a curvy woman of black skin,dressed in silks And jewelry, her head looked like a cows.

--Hathor...-- He mused. Gods didnt frequent talking to magicians like these.

But certain gods didnt mind. Specially when it came to the goddess of love.

--You love them dearly-- the diety continued-- that I can respect. Im sorry you cannot Keep them close for Long..

--Not that I mind,but why the visit.

Hathor's gaze softened-- Aphrodite and I have kept close eyes on you two. Few things scape our gazes in the department of love. We're moved by the willingless you two have of making it work.

Amos tensed,and was about to Ask something when the goddes spoke again.

--neither Will tell on you both-- she promised-- we dont wish to see this end. Neither deserve such fate -- she put a hand to her heart-- if theres anything we can do for you two,just let us know.

The magician Spared a glance where his fridge would be if he was home-- would you be able to have them spend the night with me? Allow me to Cook them dinner and breakfast and wake up to them for at least one day?

His godly companion smiled-- Of course. Expect it for Next week.

And he knew he was forbidden for interacting with any gods.  The house of life prohibited Many things-- Thank you-- he says regardless-- Will they know of this?

--Rest assured that one of Aphrodite's children Will let them know the arrangement.

Before he can nodd, the field of reeds is gone from his view and hes back home. He blinks in a stupor thats broken as the radio begins to emanate music.

Right. He still needs to make dinner.

Amunet meowed,impatient for the food and unbothered by the divine intervention he just lived.

He sighed and allowed his focus to turn to the song playing as he went to Open his fridge and get dinner made.

《If someone asked me at the end

I'll tell them put me back in it

Darling, I would do it again, ah, ah

If I could hold you for a minute

Darling, I'd go through it again, ah, ah

I would still be surprised I could find you, darling

In any life

If I could hold you for a minute

Darling, I would do it again, ah, ah》

[aziraphales-library]

Hi!! I was wondering if you know of any fics of Aziraphale and Crowley just being completely domestic with eachother and giggling. Or some Crowley comforting Aziraphale about his body?

Hello! We have some Crowley comforting insecure Aziraphale recs here. So today, here are some domestic fluff fics...

A Better Place For Us To Be by Mackem (T)

A smile spreads across Aziraphale’s face. “You’re not speaking hypothetically, are you?” he asks softly, because he needs to be sure. Because they spent millennia not saying how they felt, and he would prefer never to face that uncertainty again. “Do you really mean it, Crowley? You’d like to move somewhere else? Together?”

“Of course together. There’s no me without you,” Crowley says immediately, his voice low and tender. Aziraphale reaches out to him instinctively with a soft noise, and Crowley lets himself be reeled closer when Aziraphale fastens a hand around his wrist. He chuckles affectionately when Aziraphale nuzzles briefly into his lean stomach, overcome for just a moment by the warmth in Crowley’s voice.

Sometimes he wonders how on Earth he managed to persuade himself that Crowley had ever felt anything other than love for him, when the sheer force of it is like a tidal wave crashing over him, washing away millennia of doubt.

Something We Were Withholding Made Us Weak by triedunture (M)

"Yes, exactly. Retire." Aziraphale reaches for the last remaining tartlet brimming with summer berries. "Somewhere along the south coast, perhaps."

Or: Crowley and Aziraphale learn to move in tandem.

Blame it on the Goose by almaasi (G)

Village shenanigans AU where neighbours Aziraphale and Crowley are given the runaround by a particularly rude goose.

Or:

When Anthony J. Crowley moves to a pleasant English village, he expects to begin a peaceful life, gardening and minding his own business. He pretends not to notice his new neighbour, some flamboyant toff named Azira-something, who seems to do nothing but eat, and illustrate birds. But there’s a horrible goose on the loose, and it and its friends are causing a disturbing amount of havoc. Stealing shoes, squashing flowers, unlocking gates, tangling hosepipes... and sending Crowley out of the house with no clothes on in the middle of the night to borrow some underpants from the aforementioned neighbour. The entire population of Lower Tadfield is in uproar over these innocent-looking monsters. Something must be done! If Aziraphale and Crowley have to team up to defeat a gaggle of psychotic geese, so be it. And if they happen to like each other more than expected, so be that, too. What good is a peaceful life without a dear friend, anyhow?

A Treatise on Food Waste, Original Sin, and Other Assorted Societal Problems by rfsmiley (G)

Post-canon South Downs fic. Aziraphale struggles with a new hobby, and Crowley struggles with the concept of retirement.

The One Where Crowley Knits by abblepie (T)

Crowley did not take up knitting simply because he was jealous of a gift somebody gave his angel. He certainly didn’t do it because he wanted to see that bright face of joy turned towards him, just about as often as he could. Nothing like that at all. No, it was purely selfish, which you could tell because… well, he’d think something up later.

----

South Downs fluff, come and get it. Focused on knitting, Crowley the Maker, and declarations of love. There's also possibly a witch.

Love Makes A House A Home by Kedreeva (T)

Aziraphale and Crowley move into a South Downs cottage and agree to create their new home and life with their own hands.

- Mod D

[choices-love-affair]

I wanna marry you part 2

This was an impromptu sequel as a result of request, hope it lives up to expectations, I really struggled with transferring concept onto paper so praying it doesn’t show, eek! 

Part 1

The bright Boston sun had already begun its ascent high into the blue, cloudless sky long before Lorelei had even started to stir awake. She could feel the harshness of the light seeping in through the sheer curtains that covered the floor to ceiling windows which formed the entire external wall of Ethan’s bedroom, the view looking out onto the busy Boston Streets, already bustling with full coffee houses and cafes. She could feel her head already begin to swim and pound, the room turning underneath her. She refused to open her eyes, knowing that once she did and therefore acknowledge the pain and raging hangover that would ravage her body, the floodgates to hell would crumble and hit her with the force of a thousand suns. She laid there, trying to remain as still as possible to avoid the contents of her stomach from exiting, as she felt the warm presence of Ethan next to her, reading what she assumed was a newspaper, judging by the amplified crinkling sounds of each turned paged, assaulting her ears and head in a cruel manner.

“Too loud. Too bright. Too everything” she whined as she felt the weight in the bed shift and Ethan’s breath against her cheek

“You’re alive” he whispered; voice filled with humour

“Mmmm… just” she replied, voice still groggy

“How are you feeling?”

“I imagine death would be kinder” she mumbled back, still refusing to open her eyes “what time is it?”

“It’s just gone 9am, I didn’t want to wake you… although I was tempted to as I watched you dribble on my pillow… simply irresistible” he chuckled as he nuzzled into the crook of her neck and peppered kisses at her ear and along her jawline

“Please… please don’t make any sudden movements unless you want vomit to join that list” she remarked, shoving him away from her, Ethan let out a low chuckle as he sat back on the other side of the bed

“you know” he remarked as he flicked the paper back open and pushed his glasses back up on his nose “drunk Lorelei suffers with quite the case of verbal diarrhoea – that’s a medical diagnosis by the way –“ he quipped cheekily, glancing over and down his nose at her “I learnt many a thing last night” he continued, clearly amused with himself, humour laced his voice

“Oh godddd” she groaned as her hands came up to cover her face in embarrassment “what did I do?!” she said, voice muffled by her hands covering her face

“What didn’t you do?! Let’s start with how my kitchen now looks like a tornado had it’s way in there after you pounded on my door at 3am. By the way, I thought you were Mr Jones on the floor below” he informed her matter-of-factly, half-heartedly reading the paper “so you were a welcomed surprise”.

“That it?” she enquired; however, she was concerned the worst was still coming

“I learnt you like mustard, swiss cheese and tuna together, in a sandwich” he retorted, utterly disgusted as he scrunched his face up to reflect those feelings “the abomination still exists on the bedstand, however I wouldn’t recommend eating it now… or ever again” he exclaimed as Lorelei turned her head slightly and peeked through her fingers. She could see the sandwich in question, next to a large glass of water and two tablets and she internally smiled at his kind gesture “you almost took out my wall with a classic Mike Tyson sidestep” he continued “Oh! you’re also Australian apparently” he remarked in surprise, closing the paper and turning to his side to look at her “simply fascinating news, tell me more about my girlfriend that I supposedly know as well as the next stranger!” he joked, rubbing her arm lovingly

“I was born in Australia, Ethan. I’ve lived in America since I was six, I’m as American as they come” she retorted, clearly unimpressed with his accusations

Ethan ignored her as he continued “There was something else as well… something about a Cecelia Robinson if I recall correctly” he pondered to himself “apparently, she is… was… will be, very jealous of you. Although you didn’t say why exactly, but I’m assuming it’s somehow related to the crush you, and potentially her, had on me in high school” he added, a huge infectious smile erupted over his face “had some competition, did we?” he mused

“Oh. My. GODDDD!” Lorelei groaned louder as she pulled the pillow out from behind her head and smothered her face with it, kicking her legs in the same way a child would when having a tantrum “please tell me it ends there?” she begged, voice muffled through the pillow

“No, no it gets better” he chuckled “apparently when I stopped you from leaving, I was supposedly trying to get you into bed, you even threatened to tell my girlfriend” he cocked his eyebrow humorously at her covered form in the bed, Lorelei could hear how much he was enjoying this by the tone of his voice and she wanted nothing more than for the ground to open and swallow her whole. Ethan was clearly entertained with her antics from the night before, enjoying seeing her squirm “you told me numerous times how I’m such a wonderful boyfriend, how much you love me and…” he trailed off.

“…AND…?!” Lorelei urged, pillow still over her face

“You told me you, and I quote, ‘reckon you wanna marry me one day’” he finished off, watching as her body stilled.

Lorelei quietly screamed in protest into the pillow at what she was hearing before rolling onto her stomach and burying her face into the mattress, bringing the duvet up and over her head where she remained for a long moment, still and quiet.

“Lorelei?”

“yeah” she answered with embarrassment before slowly extracting herself from her blanketed cocoon “I’m sorry” she offered timidly, looking up at him, her hair a frazzled mess that fell over her face and eyes, eliciting a chuckle from Ethan as he attempted to sweep the hair from her face once more

“Why are you apologising?” he asked, continuing to run his hands over her head, smoothening and taming the tangled mess

“For showing up at 3am and making an absolute goose of myself, I don’t even know why you like me so much, honestly! And then I go and drop ridiculous statements like that on you - UGH” she groaned again, burying her face once more under the duvet “I know marriage isn’t something we’ve even thought about let alone discussed, forget everything I said, all of it!” she offered

“Shame, Cecelia sounded fun” he chuckled as he lent down and kissed the back of her head, before resting his mouth against her hair. Lorelei slowly pulled the duvet away from her face

“you can remember that part, she would actually be so jealous” she giggled, their faces close as he returned her smile “she would just die!” her boisterous laugh cut through the room before she winced and held her head, eyes shut tightly “owww” she whimpered

“Take the tablets” Ethan gestured, as Lorelei rolled over and sat up against the headboard, taking his advice. Ethan joined her sitting up, where they both continued to sit in silence for a long while, Lorelei wanting nothing more than for the sweet release of death to relieve her from the all-consuming pity of her self-induced pain.

“Please don’t leave me” she glanced at him sideways, awkwardness laced her features, Ethan let out a hearty laugh. “Last night would be enough to send you running for the hills, not my greatest moment, I’ll admit. The talk of marriage would have been the icing on the cake. Everybody knows how you feel about marriage” she mentioned as she took another sip of water, mindful of her pounding head

“Do they now, interesting. And how does everybody assume I feel about marriage?” he asked, settling into the bed comfortably as he watched her intently, arms crossed over his chest

“That you enjoy the endless gaggle of admirers too much to ever want to settle down with just one of them” she started giggling as she watched his expression fall into one of genuine shock

“I despise that godforsaken hospital and it’s never ending production of baseless rumours” he shook his head in disbelief “I’ll have you know that I have never been, nor will I ever be, opposed to the idea of marriage. I had just never found the right person” he assured her

Lorelei was halfway placing her glass of water back on the nightstand when she stilled, and slowly turned her head back to Ethan, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion as she appraised him and processed what he was trying to say “and you say I surprise you!”

He glanced down at their hands brushing against one another on the mattress, tentatively taking her petite one into his large, strong one and brushing her knuckles absently with his thumb,  all too familiar with the softness of her skin, as it felt with everything else regarding the both of them, two parts of a whole.

“for the right woman I would give my forever to” he glanced up and met her eyes, the mood suddenly very serious and sincere, shifting his body so he was now facing her “Lorelei, I’ll admit, those rumours are quite justified, but only because I’ve never committed to anything other than medicine my entire life, it’s the only thing I’ve known to ever truly love. I have never surrendered myself to love with another person before, I’ve never allowed myself to ever get close enough or paid much attention mind if I’m being honest. But with you…” he sighs loudly, as if a weight is lifting from his chest “with you it’s just… different. Since you, it all makes sense why it never worked with anybody else. And the whole marriage, children, for as long as we both shall live sentiment, I see that for us. So, while drunken Lorelei is a goose!” a small smirk plays at his lip before disappearing into meaningful emotion “I pray she speaks a sober Lorelei’s mind”

Lorelei’s face pales as she processes the depth of his words and the meaning behind them “You…you’d want to marry… me?!” she asked, absolutely perplexed “why?!” her face contorts into one of genuine disdain

“Lorelei, you are my home. Never doubt how much I love you, ever. And should the time arise that we want to take that step together, I’ll be ready, in a heartbeat. It’s not like I’m proposing now, just saying that I have thought about it, and I potentially might follow through in the future. I just thought you should know that” he spoke so tenderly, squeezing her hand before lifting it and placing it over his heart against his bare chest, his confident demeanour now to shifting to one of uncertainty and apprehension as he waited with bated breath for her to say something, anything.

She instantly sobered, neither of them breaking eye contact, as though an unspoken conversation was currently occurring between them “Ethan …-“ she cut herself off, closing her mouth her lips pressed into a thin line before assessing him intently. Ethan lifted her hand to his mouth and placed a tender kiss across her knuckles “you know how I much I love you, right?” she desperately queried him “I mean fuck, I worship the ground you walk on!” staring back at him with newfound admiration

“I know” he offered her a sincere smile that reached his eyes, a glint now there that never existed before.

“…Breakfast? There’s a great café next block over that has a huge array of vegetarian options perfect for you” he winked, the tender moment suddenly shifting to one of lightness and potential “lord knows you need it” as he climbed off the bed and sauntered over to his ensuite, dropping his sweatpants down to the ground and off of his feet suggestively before walking through the door and turning the shower on. Lorelei sat for a moment more, the conversation swirling through her head before a content smile spread over her face. She followed the man who just confessed he had considered spending forever with her, into the shower, last night’s hangover long forgotten, her mind only filled now with thoughts of their tomorrow, forevermore.

Taglist: @ethandaddyramsey @trappedinfandoms @openheart12 @mvalentine @noboundariesplease @kaavyaethanramsey @newcolonies

[forever-more-never-again]

Mother Goose

Requested: @sassychrissy96

Word Count:1371

Pairing: Natasha X Reader

Warnings: None

Request: Hey, :) I really enjoyed your marvel stories, my fave is Nats Winnie, I was wondering if there is any chance of a follow up, where they arrive back to the avengers? I've thought a lot about all the different reactions the team and Fury would have, having all the animals at the tower and would love to see your interpretation. Personally I see it humorous and fluffy. If not, all good. Happy writing :)

Masterlist

a/n: This can be read as a stand alone, or as a sequel to ‘Winnie’

You giggled quietly as you watched Natasha herd your flock of ducklings into the elevator of the Avengers Tower.

You coaxed Winnie and Flicka into the elevator with some Honey and carrots. Once your ragtag family of animals were in the elevator, Natasha hit the button for the common room.

Flicka reared in surprise, and you hurried to calm her down. “Woah! Hey. It’s okay. Momma’s here. It’s okay.” She nickered softly and lipped some of your hair, her eyes calming down as you stared into them.

Turning, you saw a soft look on Natasha’s face. Watching the interaction. When she realized you were watching her, she schooled her expression and looked forward towards the doors.

You couldn’t stand the silence, used to the sounds of the forest and your family, “So. Did you tell your team about...all of them?” You gestured to the menagerie of animals around the two of you.

Natasha snorted, “No. I didn’t. I’m actually looking forward to their reactions.”

You felt a little nervous at that, “They won’t hurt them..will they?”

At your tone, Natasha turned and grabbed your hands in hers, Ignoring the soft growl of Winnie, “I promise that they will not hurt your family. I will protect them.”

Dropping your hands, she kneeled to look at Winnie, “And I promise I will protect your Mom.”

You giggled, urging Natasha to stand again, holding a hand out towards Winnie to stop him from attacking, “They don’t speak English. And they understand body language, not words. But..thanks.”

A smile curved along your lips as you looked at the red head.

“I’ve only known you for a a few days, [Y/n], and I can already see that you display a lot of emotions and you care deeply for those you claim as your family.”

Whatever you were going to say next, was interrupted as the elevator dinged and the double doors slid open.

Walking out, cautiously, with your family of animals following behind. The ducks making a ruckus, Flicka snorting, and Winnie huffing, you explored the wide open space. There were bean bags around a table and a giant TV up on a wall. There was a door leading to what you could see was a state of the art kitchen and several hallways going in different directions.

In a matter of minutes, you were ripping your hair out.

“Winnie! Put that down!” You chased after the giant grizzly bear who had a half chewed Bean Bag in his mouth.

“Flicka! No!” You gave up chasing Winnie as you saw Flicka had somehow opened the fridge and was eating a cake.

“Donald! Daisy! Get down from there!” Looking up at the ceiling, you saw your gaggle of ducks sitting on top of a ceiling fan, with a skunk alongside them.

Flopping down onto the floor, you laid on your back, putting an arm over your eyes, you groaned, “I swear! They’re worse than human children!”

A giggle caught your attention, lowering your arms, you looked up into vibrant green eyes, and the giggle burst into a full blown laugh.

Slowly, you began laughing along with her, marveling at how beautiful her laugh was.

And then a new voice cut into the hysteria, “Um...why is there a bear digging through the cupboards?”

Sitting up suddenly, you accidently banged heads with Natasha. “Oops. Sorry.” You grimaced, rubbing your forehead.

Natasha offered a hand, “I’ve had worse.”

Entering the Kitchen, you came face to face with a surprised blonde Super Soldier and Tony Stark.

The look of blank shock and disbelief on both of their faces had you once again dissolving into giggles. You walked past them and grabbed Winnie by the scruff on his neck and tugged him down from where he was rummaging.

Even though he weighed more and could take you down, Winnie easily followed your tug and sat down with a huff at your feet, glaring up at you balefully with his big brown eyes.

“Umm...Who are you?” Steve Rogers, THE Captain America, was talking to you.

You gulped and glanced towards where Natasha stood with her arms crossed, watching with a smirk on her lips.

“I’m [Y/n], and Natasha was tasked with bringing me in...I guess.”

Tony grunted, and scooted around where you and the Grizzly stood in the middle of the kitchen until he reached the coffee pot.

“So. What’s with the animals?” He asked bluntly.

And then screamed and dropped the coffee pot when Flicka nosed his arm. “What! Oh...it’s a pony…”

He breathed hard to calm down. Natasha began laughing so hard, she leaned over, about to fall.

“Does anyone want to explain why a Skunk just fell from the sky onto my head!?” A voice yelled from the common area.

Groaning and with a small amount of panic, you ran out, Winnie following.

“Don’t touch her tail!” You yelled, reaching up and grabbing Daisy off the head of one very confused blond archer.

With Daisy safely snuggled in your arms, you turned to Natasha in exasperation, “Maybe we should’ve had this meeting outside.”

“I’m guessing the huge flock of birds that are on the roof are from our newest guest.”

A cool, suave voice broke through the cacophony of shouted words and growls.

Everyone turned to see a tall, imposing man with an eyepatch standing in the doorway of the elevator.

“My helicopter could barely land.”

You felt blood rush to your face, “Sorry! My family is protective and they didn’t want to stay in the forest.”

“Family?” The archer who you recognized as Clint, spoke up.

You nodded, walking to stand next to Natasha, “My mutation is kinda weird and not very special. I release a sort of hormone that attracts babies that are lonely or were orphaned. I can’t control their minds, I can’t communicate with them. They just...claim me as their mother. And so, they become my family.” You looked down at Winnie and gently scratched his nose. His rumble of pleasure loud in the quiet that followed your words.

Natasha finally spoke up, “Fury. [Y/n] here is the asset you requested me to scout out. I promised them that we would not lock up their family or separate them. I plan to not break my promise.”

Your heart did a weird flip at the intensity behind Natasha’s words and eyes. No one had ever spoke up for you or fought for you before.

“I have no intention of doing that Miss Romanoff. You can stand down. Now, [Y/n]. I planned to propose a job offer to you.”

You squinted at the man. Natasha had called him Fury, he was the one man in the room that you did not recognize from the limited media that you had been exposed to.

“I just told you-”

He cut you off, causing Flicka to wicker in distress and Donald to quack in indignation, “That you can’t control or talk to them. And that is okay. The job I want to offer is more of a search and rescue, not combat, orientated. With your unique skill set, you can help find the animals that are left behind after a devastating attack. Too many times, the animals are left behind in favor of rescuing the human survivors.”

You felt tears build up as you thought of all those scared, injured animals.

“I’ll do it.”

Natasha turned to you, “Are you sure, [Y/n]? You’d have to move into the tower.”

You raised a hand and cupped her cheek, the action surprising you and the redhead, you gathered your courage though, “I know.”

“Excellent. I have workers working on a room that will connect to the main tower. It will have grass and water and habitats for your family so that you won’t be seperated.”

You gasped, “Really?”

Tony scoffed, “Of course. I’m a billionaire, I can afford it.”

Steve nudged him, “And modest too.”

Clint burst out laughing.

You looked around, and realized that your family had grown. And it wasn’t such a bad thing.

(PS): “[Y/n]! Why is there a cat in the plane?”

“His name is Goose! He was lonely!”

“Aw Hell naw. I’m out.”

“Fury!?”

FOREVER Taglist:

@sxph-t @mialeelavellan @rainydaysrnevergrey  @platonic-plots @sociallyawkwardcircus-freak-hi @ayyidkeither @queenbbarnes @mythixmagic @chas-z @thefridgeismybestie @strangersstranger @princess-evans-addict

Natasha Taglist:

@ludwigvonbaethoven @hanjiscience-slut @kitten-q-p @morbid-gaymer @honeybadgerwhodoesntcare @sunnyandtwisty @zoeyknight @kurlyafro @thewomanofwonder @5aftermidnight @myfemininelesboworld @rizamendoza808

Avengers Taglist:

@jadepc @marvel-is-a-mood

[nervouslywritingthings-blog]

Impossible

A Pitch Black x Fem!Reader. The reader is in her 20s. This is an appreciation gift, first time writing for Pitch in years. In his perspective. Male reader version to be out within the hour! Enjoy!

---

The nighttime in that place belonged to the owls and coyotes. With only the starlight and waxing moon for light, the blackness was almost complete. The woods were a tangle of roots on which to trip, a maze of paths to becoming lost within; even with torchlight it was a journey only made under greatest need. And yet, when I had traveled out in that dreary night I hadn't expected to see her there.

She stood there on the bank of the river, the wind tossing her hair haphazardly this way and that. She was nearly bare except for what I could assume was a bathing suit, as it was much too decorated to be anything else. A small radio sat a few feet away next to a bag. Soft jazzed floated on the air and I was shocked I hadn't heard it first. She slowly walked into the water, dropping and swimming out once it had gotten to her waist.

And then, if I wasn't shocked before I certainly was then as she began to sing. Her was was smooth and clear and bewitching to hear. It was like a promise of tomorrow, of better days to come. It was beautiful and I remember leaning against a tree, bark digging into my shoulder and wishing she’d never stop. I had shut my eyes, willing my body to allow the sense of ease that wished to wash over me. I hardly realized she had stopped singing. It was until I heard her holler.

“Hello?” Her voice was a soft as her singing, vaguely similar to a nymphs voice. There was even a hint of amused curiosity there.

My eyes opened, and I remember scolding myself for startling as much as I had. She was standing in the water, looking directly at me. I remember doubting she could see me, at the time I thought she was in her teens but now I know better. I turned half-heartedly, looking for the other person she was speaking too. But when I saw none and heard her giggle, I whipped my head around again.

“Don't you know it's rude to watch someone?” Her question had brought the beginnings of a smirk to my lips.

“Don't you know better than to swim at night?” I had countered, walking forward and to the bank.

She had just smiled in response, before falling gracefully into the water. Well, she hadn't fallen, she had laid down as if she was laying back on a bed.

“The waters nice and the stars are out. It's perfect for swimming.” She hadn't even blinked at me, and I don't exactly look human.

My eyes followed her curiously a moment, running over the possibilities of this being a siren in a very clever disguise. “What is your name?” The question had fallen from my lips faster than I could stop them, and I had inwardly groaned at the dullness of them.

“(Y/N). And yours?” She was barely above water, but her eyes found mine again.

She scanned my face but didn't ask what I was. I remember thinking it odd, yet intriguing. She clearly knew I wasn't human, the way her eyes lingered on my form before shyly looking away. Her cheeks had tinted then, ever so slightly as it was I saw it. That's when I smirked.

Movement next to me pulled me from my thoughts and my eyes moved from the ceiling to her. It had been exactly a year from that day. She was curled next to me, head resting on my bare chest.

“Pitch…” My name fell off her lips easily as she cuddled closer.

Her naked body pressed to mine, the heat from both trapped by the blanket. My body still buzzing softly with aftershocks of the anniversary present she gave me just a few minutes ago. Her head lifted, her eyes opening slowly as she looked at me.

“Are you alright?” The amount of concern in her voice was still shocking, the confused tiredness in her eyes and slight pout too much. I looked away.

Guilt pressed heavily on my chest, twisting my stomach and lurching my heart out. A few days prior I had yelled at her. I had spat out the words with the ferocity and rapidity of machine gun fire. My fuse had simmered and fizzed like a firework in a chill autumn breeze, then I had exploded with unrestrained fury.

Her watery eyes had enlarged and the hairs on the nape of her neck bristled. A gaggle of goose pimples laminated her frigid body. The fear that rolled off of her in waves was intense. But I hadn't stopped, not when the tears began to fall and not when she slowly curled in on herself, too afraid to step away yet wanting to.

Her hand on my face startles me, and my eyes snap back to her.

“Hey, you still with me?” She is fully awake now. She is leaning over me, sleep gone from her eyes.

“I..” I stop, clearing my throat of emotions that threaten to spill unwanted from my mouth.

“I was thinking of the argument.” I manage after a moment, voice hoarse from dam I had built.

She sighs through her nose, shoulders dropping and eyes softening. She means forward, pressing her forehead to mine and my arms instinctively come up to wrap around her waist.

“I don't blame you, I had overstepped the boundaries. Besides, it's not like I haven't yelled at you before. Couples fight, some are bigger than others.” Her words were only half soothing, but I accepted them.

She kissed me then, and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words would never be. My hand rests below her ear, my thumb caressing her cheek as our breaths mingle. She pulls away too soon and my lips chase after hers. Her giggle opens my eyes and I stare at her and it is my turn to be confused.

“The power of love, ” She begins and I feel my eyes wanting to roll. “doesn't give me the right to meddle in your life, but should you ever need a "wonder woman" I'll be right there.” She says softly, knowing there are more troubles within my mind that I have yet to share with her. I can feel my own heart stutter at her words and know it is my turn to speak the truth.

“The power of love bestows responsibilities, but not rights.” My start is nearly identical to hers. “I have no right to your heart but am blessed to love you with my own. I have no right to your time but am honored to share moments. It is for me to do what is best for you, and not seek fulfillment of my own desires at the expense to your wellbeing. It is for me to seek what would make you happy, what would be best for your soul” I want to end it there, but it feels incomplete and so I continue. “Just know that when you tell me of your hurt, I hurt too, how can I not? Anyone who abuses you is no friend of mine and I owe them nothing.” I pull her back down into a kiss, and one word passes through my mind.

Impossible. This was supposed to be impossible, these feelings. And yet, I can't seem to remember how I lived before meeting her.

[randombtsprincessa]

Absinthe || 3

Author: Randombtsprincessa

Characters: Jung Hoseok x Reader

Chapters:  01  02

Warning: Dubious Consent

A full week passed since my return to my hometown. There was zero change as to how my life used to be when I used to be at home. My time was split between studying and hanging out with Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook. I was closely watched by Jin and Namjoon and try as I may they never did talk a lot about them. After a while, both Jimin and I gave up, leaving my bodyguards to their mysterious auras.

The classes soon became something of a drag only undergoing a minor change since the arrival of Jung Hoseok and Min Yoongi, names I’d caught when a gaggle of giggling girls had been gossiping about them.

True to my suspicions, they were much older, somewhere in mid twenties compared to the scattering of late teen to early twenties of elite who attended the finishing school before they could inherit their respective companies from their fathers or were married off to other heirs. They were rich, they had to be, judging from their carriage and their bearing but I had never heard of any Min or Jung families in the city.

They were intriguing, I had to admit. Always standing apart - murmuring among them; while people stared at them, including me. Of course, the stranger thing was that the younger one, Hoseok seemed to always have an eye out for me. He would look up when I would be looking at them, a smirk playing around his lips which would widen the moment I dropped my gaze and scurried off.

Now I was no stranger to male attention. I wasn’t ugly per say and I wasn’t dumb but I had had enough experience with men who only wanted a share of my allowance or wanted to get me engaged to them so that my father’s business became theirs. I was always warned away from them and rightly so. I just couldn’t place those two in one of those categories but one thing was certain.

They were bad news and I was to stay away from those.

Yoongi griped about the stuffy uniform again and Hoseok leant a shoulder against the metal lockers, his eyes cast upwards.

“Shut up, will you?” he shot finally at the older man to only have his glare darken at his friend. “Who do you think you’re talking to? Have some respect for the man who keeps your ungrateful ass alive.” He spat back.

“I’m not so sure about that. You might just kill me one of these days just from how much you complain bro.”

It was Yoongi’s turn to roll his eyes. They both knew if Yoongi wanted Hoseok dead, he would already be six feet under. The older man had a cold stare that could unnerve a man twice his size but they all knew just how proficient Min Yoongi really was. Hoseok was lucky he had Yoongi for his handler.

“The girl’s staring…again.” Yoongi grunted and Hoseok looked up quickly, schooling his features to mirror those of the classic fuck boy. That was the most attractive trope going about, wasn’t it? He had to look alluring and yet edgy. He had to draw her in. Sadly, unlike the girls who were prattling and giggling over the two men in corners, Y/N Y/L/N simply turned her eyes down and hurried away, books pressed tightly to her chest.

Yoongi clicked his tongue in disappointment.

“I feel like you’re losing your touch.” He said.

“I am not.” Hoseok snapped, glaring after the shy girl who’d vanished through the double doors before straightening himself up. “Take the car and go. I’ll see you later.” He said and walked off; using his long legs to catch up with the girl he was supposed to win over in a month.

I rushed towards the school gates to wait to see if the car had arrived or not. Jin or Namjoon had taken to drop me off and pick me up, sometimes together; sometimes in shifts but today I’d hurried out earlier just to avoid the cocky stare of Hoseok.

It was too late to go back inside anyway.

I sighed, running my fingers through my hair.

“Need a ride?”

I stiffened, turning to look at the said cocky man as he loomed near me, his height easily towering over me. “No, thank you,” I said, curtly, albeit politely and turned to the front again.

“What are you waiting for then?” he slipped his hands into his pockets, a wolfish grin playing on his lips. I raised my eyebrows at him. “What’s it to you what I’m waiting for? I could be waiting for the Ancient Chinese Civilization to rise again and it wouldn’t be your business.” I said.

It was his turn to raise his eyebrows. “Is that really what you’re waiting for?” he asked. “If you are then I should warn you, those weren’t particularly pleasant times,” he said.

“I know,” I said shortly.

The boy next to me shuffled uncomfortably but didn’t move away. He murmured something under his breath. “What did you say?” I asked.

He was silent for a bit before smirking down at me. “You’re different than what I thought you would be. It’s a pleasant change. I will have to remember that.” He said. I gazed at him steadily until his eyes flickered to the gate where on proper time, the car slid in.

“I’ll see you later, Princess.” He said, lowly, his gaze not moving as Jin stepped out, his eyes looking around the school grounds with a practiced eye. He stiffened in his spot before chuckling, “I see…I will definitely see you around, Princess.” He backed away before turning around and hurriedly moving away.

I shivered as I walked quickly to Jin. Hoseok’s voice had been thick with implication, deep and dangerous. I could feel goose bumps rise along my skin at the promise in it.

The apartment that had been given to Yoongi and Hoseok under the strict and watchful eye of the Master was large for lack of a better word, big enough to accommodate both the men who needed meters away from each other even though they considered each other brothers. While it was lavish it was still cozy, something Yoongi preferred. He might be outwardly cold, yet there was no fault in liking warmth in the places he lived in.

He undoubtedly preferred it when he was alone, when his partner wasn’t around. He could take a breather and enjoy his warm beverages, maybe watch a little thrash TV…

He was about to switch on the TV when the door opened, revealing the very man Yoongi was taking a reprieve from. Something about the clench of his jaw, the furrow of his brow and frowning eyes made him stand up, ready to take on any enemies.

“What happened?” he asked sharply.

If something had happened to expose them, they needed to bolt quickly, leave no clues. The Master would need to be notified and a clearing crew would need to take care of any trails they had left behind. New prospects would need to be offered to the clients…there would be a lot of shit to handle.

“Settle down, we’re fine.” Hoseok said quickly, recognizing the fight or flight in his partner’s voice.

Yoongi remained standing, watching as he slowly removed his jacket, neatly hanging it up then patting his back pockets, lips pulled into his mouth as he looked around the apartment. “Is that caramel I smell?” he asked suddenly.

Yoongi’s eyes flickered but didn’t drop as he shrugged, sitting back down. “A man can have his poisons,” he replied.

“Yes, but caramel…? If you want, there’s a bottle of Bourbon in the fridge.” He said.

Yoongi remained silent, sipping the warm drink delicately, letting out a relieved sigh to taunt Hoseok as he rolled his eyes and went to get himself a glass of the brown liquid. “We need to talk.” He said from the kitchen as Yoongi sighed, already wishing he was asleep.

Jimin was sprawled on my bed as I flung out old clothes that I couldn’t wear here now that I was out of Paris. “Jeez, how much do you own woman?” he groaned when a blue top landed on his face.

“Exactly, I need more space, I need to de-clutter. Your mom said I could throw stuff out and she’d donate them for me,” I said. “As long as she doesn’t make me wear them,” Jimin sat up, picking the top off his face before stretching it out in front of his face. “You can’t wear this here?” he asked.

I shook my head.

“It’s Prada!” he gasped. “Yeah, but the color was definitely more French than…here,” I spun on my heel to emphasize my point and he groaned tossing the top to the pile of discards on the floor as he dropped back down.

“Hmm,” I didn’t reply to his protests until he spoke again.

“Did you talk to your dad?” he asked.

“Not yet, if he can take some time out of his oh so busy schedule maybe he’ll pay his daughter some attention since he brought me back here in the first place.” I said, unable to help feeling a bit bitter.

He had been adamant about bringing me back, almost bordering on coming over and dragging me back himself but now that I was here, he seemed like he could care less. I wasn’t hurt or anything. This wouldn’t be the first or the last time he had neglected his family for his expansive business but he could be a bit more receptive…maybe even say a hello when he gets back home, when he does that is.

“Why do you ask?” I asked.

“I heard Mom and Dad talking. Your dad has a reason to bring you back, Y/N.” he said.

“Which is…?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t stick around to hear. Maybe he’s going to marry you off.” He said.

I snorted. “I’m too young to be married off, Jimin, don’t be ridiculous.” I said.

“So, you don’t have to be married right off the bat. You could get engaged.” He muttered.

“Hey, relax; I’m sure it has nothing to do with my love life.” I laughed, wrapping my arms around his shoulder, placing my chin on his head as he wrapped his own around my waist. “Don’t baby me, Y/N; I’m not your boyfriend.” He murmured, but I just laughed, pushing off of him and moving back to sort my clothes.

When I entered the class the next day, Hoseok and Yoongi were already in their seats on the other side of my seat. Jungkook and Taehyung, of course, weren’t. I sighed at my luck before slowly moving to my chair and sitting down, feeling the boy’s eyes on me.

“Good morning, Princess.” Hoseok chirped and I distinctly heard Yoongi snort before Hoseok threw him a glare. I turned my head just a little to nod once before looking forward as finally my two moron best friends showed up.

“Hey, sorry we’re late, Mark caught us outside.” Tae said.

“I thought he graduated already.” I grumbled.

“Nope, held back a year,” Jungkook said with relish then leant over my desk. “He’s throwing one of his parties again and he invited us all.” He said.

“A party, this early in the year, that’s a little…” I trailed off.

“Cool and you’re coming. It’s been ages since we got to party with you ever since you left for France.” Taehyung said.

“I’ll need permission from my dad.” I muttered.

Jungkook laughed, “Oh please, your dad never says no to you.” He said. I hummed in reply as they began talking among themselves before I caught Hoseok’s eye. “Can I help you?” I asked irritated at his constant staring.

“Oh you can Princess, in more ways than one but I’ll be nice for now.” He smirked.

I gaped at him before letting out a disgusted sound, twisting my pen in my fingers. “Is that the line you’re going to go with, are you very sure?” I asked snidely.

He shrugged. “What’s wrong with that line? It’s the truth.”

“Yeah well, I wonder how many times it has worked with princesses…Not a lot, hmm.” I smirked when his eyebrows rose, challenging my statement. “Are you sure you want to doubt my pick up skills, princess?” he murmured, his voice dipping.

I glanced once behind to see Jungkook and Taehyung oblivious to our banter and Yoongi obviously uncaring.

“I don’t need to be sure of doubting your skills; I already know it doesn’t work. Why don’t you try them on the trashier, more desperate girls in our year? You know the ones who fawn over you. You could get to them easily.”

I finally turned my head, effectively ending our conversation and Hoseok made an unsatisfied noise, looking forward too.

He was frustrated; I could feel it rolling off of him in waves, making the whole place seem dangerous somehow.

I could feel his heavy presence against my skin for the whole class, as if somehow he had broken out of the student phase and entered something more mature, something darker, bolder.

I balled my fists at the thought. He was something different. No boy could ever have that kind of presence; no one was mature enough to see so intimidating even when they weren’t paying attention to you. But I could still feel his frustration hanging in the air, and it just made me uneasy.

It was literally a relief when I was finally able to get away from everyone at school. Jungkook and Taehyung had made me swear that I would at least talk to my father about the party and I had given in, knowing I wouldn’t be able to say no. They would just contact Jimin and he would personally make sure I got out of the house.

Not that I particularly wanted to go but I knew my father would say yes without even really hearing what I’d asked. If he decided to at least deign to pay attention to me.

So imagine my surprise when he decided to come home earlier and asked to have me join him for dinner in the dining room.

Mrs. Park dressed me up and escorted me to the Dining room before retiring with an assuring smile at me as I sat across my father who was still in his work clothes, only ditching his suit jacket and loosening his tie a little.

“Ah, my love how was your day?” he asked.

“It was fine, dad…how was yours?” I asked, picking up my cutlery.

“Good, good, it was the same as usual, filled with papers and numbers and people.” He threw me one of his awkward smiles and I pursed my lips, nodding appreciatively at his effort.

I was happy that he was trying. This may have been the first time when he was even attempting to create a rapport with me after Mom died. I wasn’t going to be selfish. I knew my father was a good man. He could’ve had taken girlfriends, mistresses after his wife died but he never had, married first and foremost to his empire. His family had taken a backseat always to him but I could try to humor his effort at trying to make it work with me.

However, he was still a businessman, a very astute one at that so any investment he made, be that of time or money, it had to give him back something.

“So, what brought this on?” I asked.

“Can’t a man have dinner with his daughter?” he asked.

“Yes he can, of course he can…so what did bring this on?” I persisted.

Dad chewed on his chicken slowly, watching me closely before he sighed, drinking some water and wiping at his mouth with a napkin. “I have a few things I need to talk to you about but I know that I can’t just order you about. You’re too old to do things just because your father tells you to do them.”

“What’s that you want me to do?” I asked.

“I was thinking we could get to know each other better before I pass everything on to you.” He said slowly.

“Okay,” I halted sighing. He never did open up when I wanted him to so I decided to just ask him about the party.

“There’s a party at the Tuan’s and I was invited for it,” I said. I expected him to just nod and hum but he surprised me by looking up sharply.

“A student party or a business one…? Because I have received no such invitation,”

“A fun one, Dad, no one would invite me for a business party.” I laughed, but he didn’t even smile, just watching me with a frown on his face.

“Well, I’m sorry my dear, but you can’t go.” He said.

I stopped laughing, staring at him in pure shock. “What did you say?” I gasped.

“You’re not going to a party, Y/N.” he said.

“Why not?” I asked curiously.

He huffed. “It’s time you pick up some more mature habits, Y/N. I know what happens at Tuan parties, I have seen the vines that hang about. Now, I haven’t said anything or even asked about Paris but now that you’re back home,”

“Wait, what do you mean about Paris? What do you think I was doing there?” I cut him off.

He fixed me with a steady gaze. “I have no idea but Paris isn’t the most prudent of places either.” He said.

I gaped at him in sheer shock. What had gotten inside him?

“I went there to get over Mom. What are you even trying to imply? I have always been responsible!” I spat.

“Then you would understand why I am not allowing you to go to Mark Tuan’s drug addled and booze ridden party,”

I pushed my chair back, standing up. “Excuse me,” I said harshly and rushed out of the room, my kitten heels clicking on the tiles as I rushed upstairs.

I kicked off my shoes and shot off a text to the boys that I wasn’t coming to the party before flopping down on my bed, my eyes burning but I refused to shed any tears.

He was right. Paris hadn’t been the safest or the most discrete places but I’d kept to myself, going out of my way to not be caught in any scandals and now here he was saying just how much he didn’t trust me.

I heard a tiny knock on my door and looked up from my pillow as Jimin opened the door and looked at me. “Hey, you ok?” he asked. I shrugged and he clicked his tongue in sympathy, moving to sit next to me, wrapping his arms tightly around me so I was lying on his shoulder.

“I heard what happened from the servants. He shouldn’t have said that.” He said, stroking my hair.

I looked up at him in surprise. “The servants?” I asked.

He shrugged. “The cooks love feeding me because of my cheeks. It’s easy to get them to talk when you’re as hot as me, you know. The servants gossip like rats.” He smiled when I giggled, hitting his chest at his cheesiness.

“Thanks for cheering me up,” I said, snuggling back against him.

“The joys of having a live at home best friend,” he said before sitting up. “So, will you go to the party?” he asked.

“Wait, what?” I asked.

“The party at Mark Tuan’s…I’m not surprised that the idiot got held back a year. Always told him to study but oh well, Jungkook told me all about it and if you want, I can take you.” He said.

I considered my options. For one, ok, I really had no plans on going but now that my father had pissed me off, I wanted to go, let out some steam. Besides, these were my home friends, my people; I’d known them all my life. I could go have fun with them.

“Let’s go.” I said.

Jimin sneaked me out the traditional way – straight out the window. He had to hold onto me while I climbed the ledge down, still in my dining dress but it didn’t matter. I just wanted to get out of that house. His car which was always ready to go was parked on the lawn under my window.

Once we were safely down, he motioned me to lie down on the floor of the back seat while he drove out the gates, acting like he was going out by himself. Once we were on the road, I sat up.

“You planned this with Jungkook and Taehyung, didn’t you?” I asked.

I saw him grin in the rearview mirror. “Such a smart girl, how does it feel to rebel for once?” he asked.

“Fucking awesome,” I grinned, sliding to the front.

When we reached the Tuan Mansion, the party was already in full swing. There were people strewn everywhere. Couples were making out in the gardens, kids were smoking on the porch, drunk games that were on the brink of turning sexual were on the roll in the living room and I spied the host himself playing one of those games.

Jimin kept an arm wrapped around my shoulders as we looked for Jungkook and Taehyung.

We found them near the bar, already drinking. Jungkook looked up when he saw us approach. “Hmm, a definite ten out of ten,” he said, grinning, making Jimin hit him in the chest.

“I’m joking, she’s an eleven, happy?” he said.

I wrinkled my nose at him. “I’ll be happy once you sober up and don’t talk about girls like they’re auction products.” I said.

“I have seen you grade men with Kim Jisoo!” Taehyung gasped and Jungkook gave me a look. “What, if boys can do it, girls can do it too!” I spread out my hands and Jimin laughed. “Ok, I’ll go cover for you now. You two,” he barked at the younger boys. “You’d better keep her safe until I come and get you later. If I find any of you being mean to her, I’ll kick your asses myself.” He snapped before placing a gentle kiss on my temple. “You be safe.” He said before disappearing into the crowds as Jungkook handed me a glass.

“Drink up partner, loosen up a little.” He said.

“Well here goes,” I said and tossed the drink back.

It was safe to say I’d loosened up a lot. Taehyung, who had been the designated driver, had put me on a couch, with water to hydrate myself as he kept an eye out for Jungkook who’d vanished outside with a girl.

My head was pounding with that entire sudden alcohol intake and I got up woozily so I could go splash some water on my face. I remembered some parts of Mark’s house from previous visits so I stumbled into the hallways when I felt an arm wrap around my waist.

“Whoa, easy there,”

I slumped into the warm embrace, groaning as the thudding in my head increased and I felt myself being straightened. “Well, Princess; looks like you’re a bit of a lightweight aren’t you?”

Princess…

I blinked, squinting up to look at the man standing in front of me, smirking down at me.

Hoseok…

Great, this just had to be my luck…

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Mark Tuan invited me.” He said, shrugging his graceful shoulders. Oh…well, that ruled out him stalking me, I guess…

“What the hell do you want?” I snapped.

“I’m keeping you off of the floor, Princess. Let’s get some of that snarl out of your voice, shall we?” he muttered, putting me up against the wall, his hands pressed on the sides of my head as he hovered over me.

“You about to puke?” he asked.

I glared at him but shook my head as he narrowed his eyes at me. “I’m wearing expensive shoes and if you throw up on them, you’re paying for new ones.” He warned.

“You’re lucky you’re hot.” I growled.

He looked taken aback for a split second before smirking again. “You think I’m hot?” he asked.

I snorted in a distinctly undignified way as I tried to push past him, “Of course, the entire school thinks you’re hot.” I snapped. Hoseok didn’t budge; instead he pushed me further into the wall. “The entire school isn’t you, Princess.”

I huffed, slumping against the wall again. Why wouldn’t he just leave me alone? I was too tired to fight him off right now. I just heaved in defeat. “What do I have to do to get you to let me go?” I asked.

Hoseok considered his options, his eyes dropping to my mouth for a split second as he licked his own lips. “You could let me kiss you, Princess.” His trademark smirk returned.

I scoffed in disgust. “What are you, a middle school kid? Get away from me, you creep.” I said.

“Don’t be like that; you might just like it,” he leered at me shamelessly before his hands were in my hair, massaging my scalp, his fingers just shy of dipping into my collar.

I stiffened as he slid closer, his chest now against mine and my eyes widened when his narrowed, focusing on my lips. I should’ve said something, I should’ve tried to push at him but I just stood there while he leant in and pressed his lips to mine.

His mouth was warm, the pressure as light as a butterfly’s wings as he nudged them against my skin trying to coax me into submission. I gulped, and he must’ve felt it because he smirked, his mouth turning more confident, parting and his hot breath, free from any stench of alcohol, wafted over mine. He was sober. He knew what he was doing.

I hesitantly reached up to wrap my arms around his neck and kissed back, slowly, testing out the waters.

His hands went to my waist, wasting no time in yanking me towards him, our bodies no flush as he moved his lips expertly, nipping lightly on my bottom lip. Heat coursed through me as he slowly glided his fingers across my hips, reaching towards the hem of my dress, hands sliding under when I felt I remembered where we were and what I was doing with whom.

I pulled away quickly, pushing away from him, staring at him open mouthed as he opened his eyes, blown already. He looked shocked to say the least; maybe no one had ever pushed him away. I untangled myself from him and backed away quickly, rushing out into a daze.

The cold air outside knocked some sense into me but that soon changed into dread when a familiar car swept up at the gate. I watched as Jin stepped out, his suit looking very out of place, the wire around his ear gone as he glared at the passed out kids lying where he’d parked.

I might’ve been defiant but right now I was just grateful. I quickly rushed to him and his eyes caught me at least a few miles away. He moved his eyes over the grounds to check for any threats before looking me over. I came to stand in front of the older man and he just stared at me for a minute.

“Are you ok?” he asked, his voice cold.

I nodded shortly and he opened the back door for me, letting me slide in to see Namjoon’s eyes on me as he looked almost as displeased as Jin. I had no choice but to hang my head as we drove home.

The house was silent when we arrived Home, the lights turned down, no one around as Jin opened the staff entry door with his key. Namjoon quietly slipped away without another word or glance at me as Jin walked me to my room.

He even came in as I went into the bathroom to clean off my makeup.

“The story is that you took a little night time drive. Namjoon and I went with you with the driver. We just got a little late. You will only repeat the story if and only if anybody asks. If not, please, refrain talking about tonight.” He said his voice formal and abrupt. I agreed wholeheartedly.

“How did you know?” I asked.

“I caught Mr. Park sneaking into your room through the window. He had no choice but to sell you out.” Jin said.

“You didn’t tell on him, did you? He was just helping me.” I said, coming out in my pajamas.

Jin was standing at my window, his broad back to me as he stared out. “No, I did not. Seeing as ratting him out means ratting you out which leads to my and Namjoon’s dismissal it would’ve been quite silly.” He said, turning around to look at me. “You were very irresponsible tonight, Y/N.”

I opened my mouth but he continued.

“While I understand the need you must’ve felt, it was still unsafe. Yes, I do hear the gossip, it’s my duty to protect you and gossip is the first and foremost frontier in news. You’d be surprised how many enemies you can flush out if you just listen to your staff. Of course, the people in your household are quite loyal, but they did talk about what your father said to you. Do you realize, you just might’ve proved him right?”

I bit my lip.

“I’ve never done those things; I just wanted to try it,” I shrugged.

“Your father told me to not tell you things for your own protection but I have never believed in leaving my charges in darkness. It just leads to recklessness, like I saw tonight. The reason why your father was refusing you to go to the party was because Mr. Tuan has been suspect in many frauds in your father’s company. He’s going to face inquiry soon. He was just worried he might try to get to you to pressure your father.” Jin told me.

He watched as the news sunk, my eyes glazing over. He nodded stiffly going to exit my room. “Goodnight, Y/N,” he said and shut the door as I sat on my bed, my eyes closing as regret over the entire night washed over me.

I rubbed my lips, trying to remove any remainder of the cocky, arrogant Hoseok from my skin.

However, his previous promise of seeing me around rang in my head. After what happened tonight, I was sure he was going to keep it and the thought of it sent shivers down my back, some of them not from uneasiness.

[simpoot]

Yeah the dandruff you have is hypothetical because I eat them before they can get 5 inches thick like they WOULD IF I WASNT HERE. and silly you, silly goose, i already put crumbs in your bed. I spend hours superglueing individual crumbs onto ur bed and its so uncomfortable and everytime ur like >:0 MY BED!! i giggle and gaggle and cackle so evilly - 🍄

>:(

Evil. Evil. Evil 🍄! You little menace of a gremlin quit leaving crumbs in my bed!!! Thank you for munching on my potential dandruff though, you make my hair hygiene so much better, you lil parasite

[way2walk]

Disaster gays go for a ride with friends

Chapter two of Disaster gays in love or...what ever I called it lmao, This might have a different vibe because I’m less sad more confident because of a certain Blue bee who I’m not sure if they would want to be tagged or not lmao. But I hope it’s still good! Maybe it’s better actually! You get to know everyone a bit more at least. More notes at the end~

This one is 1261 Words long holy shit! I was about to say not that much bigger but that’s about 2x as large and tooK less time! Wow!

Aleron Here I was now walking toward a red van with words written all over the windows, mostly stuff about sports and I already knew this was Conny’s car. Conny did baseball as a kid, then basketball, and now he was on the Swim team as one of the sea slugs, Weird to have a team that’s supposed to be fast is named after a fucking slug. And he’s on the tennis team as a...I don’t fucking know a tennis player? Why don’t tennis teams have fun names or mascots? I guess...most tennis players aren’t on a team...Huh Maybe he’s a ghost? Our school mascot is a ghost, our football team is the  Devils, Our baseball team in the Onis, and the basketball team in the Phantoms. The founder of our school was weird and...the names just sorta stuck. Why the swim team got the short end of the stick when it came to cool names I don’t know. Why not the Kraken, the kappas, the sirens. Even selkies would be cool! Guess sea slug is better the tennis player though. Anyways Conrad was currently arguing with Goose who would get to drive, Goose was fucking tall guy, so was Conny but he was scary tall like he’s been stretched out tall. “You’re not fucking driving, you’ve had three beers already you’re not killing me and my lady.” He frowned, arm around Casey and Conrad groaned “Fine...But I’m sitting in the front.” Conrad grumbled which made Casey pout and it was like watching a man trying to say no to his dog. He cracked so easy. That was sorta adorable “Okay okay, take the damn front! But I get a window seat.” He hissed and June cheered “I GET THE MIDDLE” Which made my heart sink GOD DAMN IT JUNE CAN YOU STOP BEING A COCK BLOCK. Of course, I didn’t say that though, I’m trying to be a part of this not get my ass beat by a damn giant got it! Anyways i let June climb into the car before getting In after her, she’s looking at me, I’m looking at Conny, and Conny is looking to the stars and I’m starting to think I’m going to have to settle for June. Conrad I can’t just, stare at him, so I settle for stars, the stars like his freckles, the moon like his eyes, the sky black and shimmery like his dark curly locks and the wheat field below like his perfect tan skin. Even the plane with its red light had a place on his face, that being the pimple on his nose that had been a consistent problem since middle school, I wanna boop that nose, I wanna boop that zit. I love him, even the gross parts. Aleron “So um..Ya like warheads?” I asked June awkwardly, getting one out of my candy pocket after Handing a bag of mary jane to Casey up front “Never had one” She purrs back and I stuff that son of a bitch in her both. Conrad “AHHHHHHHH” I’m knocked out of my daydreams by June squealing and Goose pressing on the breaks “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT JUNE.” He yells and looks back at the now squirming girl and I just sit and wait as the two yell at each other before I notice Al. He’s having a trip of his own right now, starting with a small snicker, then a giggle, and soon enough a full on chortle, filled with so much joy at another's pain even while experiencing his own, face puckered up as sour green apple took over his body but he just couldn’t stop laughing, snorting like a pig at this point he was so deep into it. Soon enough I was laughing too, smiling at him with all the love in the world and when he saw it his face went red and he looked away, a smile still spread across his face as he chipped away at the blue flowers painted on his nails. How was he so beautiful? How did he accomplish what no one else did to me, make my heart flutter, make me choke on my words, try to speak without knowing what I’m saying? Make me just want to hear him laugh, his heavenly laugh and I needed to hear it. So as the blunt got passed around I started to tell some childhood stories, like that time I wore a dress to school and got sent home and my mom freaked out, or the time I walked into the old apartment in the city with a pigeon on my head and later found out my grandmama used the pigeon for soup, goose told why his name was goose, because he one angered an entire gaggle of geese because he petted one, Casey talked about her time when she used to identify as a boy and the funny stories that came from that, and how tough she used to act as a kid while secretly wearing her mom’s heels and makeup, June talked about how she was the one usually wearing makeup with Casey, taught her the ropes,  and how  she herself used to break a lot of things and ruin everything with paint. Al was having a great time, smocking and drinking but...when it got to him to share a story he kinda tensed up and stared before laughing and looking down, “Ay, it’s no pressure to tell a story dude.” I mentioned gently, looking at his with a soft smile as everyone nodded along but he shook his head and gulped before speaking “When I was a kid, I knew I was...uh...well... I Maybe not only boys but like I liked boys a bit, I always knew that.” he gulps and looks away before laughing “And my mom, turns out she...she didn’t even like guys, at...at all. But she was married, to a man.” He mumbled, leaning back, I could tell this story would be a little sensitive which fit the mood, even goose’s stories had a bit of a humbling sensitive tone while also making up laugh “And um, so I came out to her young, I didn’t know what sexuality was, so like, I didn’t know it was weird to say ‘Hey mom, that boy is really pretty’...But uh yeah.” he looked around and slowly relaxed “So me and her made like this pact, we kept a secret from my dad who was,,, kind of a controlling dick and like, we went to gay parent clubs, and mom,,, tried to find me another mom, and like I made friends with other kids, not that they were gay, but having this secret helped up bond like we hadn’t before. And then I introduced my mom to my English teacher while at a pride restaurant and...I got another mom a few months after that.” He chuckled, the smile on his face so adorable I almost couldn’t contain myself he then told us more about the divorce, the goofy things he did with his new moms, about what it was like when his moms opened up a flower shop Cafe, how he was constantly stung by bees after that and one time ate one, it was all so relaxed and we all laughed and smoked as Goose just drove. It felt nice, wholesome, like what I wanted but... I only wished a little that it was just me and Al.

So i love my gay sons so much and Thank you Charlie (I hope it’s okay to casually call you that some people are iffy about it) For the boost of confidence! I always wanted to write about them but always been iffy, who knows maybe one day i’ll draw them their new designs all clean and spiffy. I know this one is a lot more huge papargraphs and stuff but like i wanted to teach yall about them a little more! Also my dream school is a school with a cool mascot and i really like the idea of a ghost mascot. 

Next chapter should include S’mores and Butts in the most innocent awkward teen way possible I swear!

[spacebookettes]

A Dark Town Undone

The Dark Town was to be in a movie. Yes another post apocalyptic.

Extras all dressed up in whatever they could find as Victorian ghosts. English pale skins and delicate bodies. The usual characters of Dark Town sent to the side streets and light towns for holidays.

The pale skins were dotted with silver glitter, an ethereal picture they made; fake dust in their hair and on the top of the hats. Some brought their large ethereal dogs.

The neon was turned off, an occasional spasm.

The main characters were given torches, some things were thrown over and there were lots of helpings of apocalyptic trash.

Beams of light stretched out along the abandonment and up toward the airy black ceilings occasionally disappearing into the great dark caverns. A zap of blue or pink would attract the direction of the torches. They were hoping someone had left food. Torches invaded old food trollies and cyber restaurant windows and then storage. The occasional glint of hidden silver glitter.

The usual horror movie conversation about something not feeling right and we should get out of here.

No food.

Of course an underground town with no lights on can be made to look like an ever expanding lost city.

Increasing tense voices as the protagonists venture deeper into abandoned food carts and dusty cyber restaurants. Their thoughts echo around the cavernous dark spaces, getting more desperate.

The last of the water shared and finished.

Tiny spots of veiled glitter seem to be getting closer as the torches dart around the blackness. Conversations from one who swears they’ve seen a face out there.

SNAP something breaks and echoes around them, “it sounded wooden"

Back to back with furious torches they continue deeper into the dusty no food.

An ancient brick drops next to them, all the torches clash to inspect it and then inspect the high concrete places.

“LETS GO BACK” a little piece of faded silk floats down onto their head, SCREAMING as they run backtracking their journey. SNAP SNAP SNAP

Only their breathlessness sounded. The lost cars of the abandoned parking spaces had flashes of reflective eyes on the back seats. The breathing stops as the main characters lower their torches, not able to stand the animalistic eyes any longer. The sound of a car door opening. Running up the sloping roadway. Such a long roadway, a giant wooden cart wheel on one side, dustily decomposing. Up and onto a northern English moor of heathers and slowly retaking trees. “NO, WE HAVE TO GO BACK... THIS ISN’T RIGHT.” Turning to little flecks of glitter emerging out of the dark underpass, pale faces, ghostly hair and peppered vintage hats. Tools of the modern world, taken from the dark town. Aluminium piping, a flash of shiny new hammer, a shopping trolley, with one wooden cart wheel, full of dangerous reflections.

The end

By Peter Stringer

Clowns

An old car racing down a forest road. No honking. A covered painting vibrates in the back. The art dealer had found the Worst painting in existence. He was bringing it to the castle, a castle sometimes lost in the mist, that local people swear disappears sometimes. In fact the locals will not go up to Gray Stone Castle, ever. The surrounding villages have never had any contact with anyone at the castle, no local businesses used by the inhabitants; in the whole history of the region not one interaction... though the castle has always been there in perfect condition, a little smoke with the faintest tinge of red escaping from a little gargoyle chimney on one grey stone corner... ALWAYS a little plume of smoke for hundreds of years, as far back as anyone’s ancestor’s could remember.

Winding up into the mountainous region the car stops at the closest village. An older lady sat with a plinking smartphone looks up and at the car “I’m looking for Gray Stone Castle.” ‘it might not be there today' said the lady. The man laughed. The lady got up, went indoors and locked her door. “huh... mountain folk.” The clouds parted higher up in the rock, a small turret could be seen in the sunshine. Distant thunder cracked from darkened clouds somewhere behind the castle.

The car reached the courtyard outcropping of the castle entrance. A robot made with skin coloured metal, opened the door. ‘you drive yourself' asked the robot “yes when I find a place where it’s still legal, I always find a car and take it for a spin... and no tracking, makes things easier.” The robot took the painting inside. ‘smaller than I expected.’ said the robot about the painting. ‘the mistress will be pleased though... when she gets back.’ It started raining with a misty grey chill. In the distant valley below there was still sunshine.

Sat by a small fire in a vast grey fireplace “when will your mistress be back" the robot flinched slightly at the word your. ‘this evening or tomorrow morning I believe.' “I might have to wait?! That wasn’t part of the job!”

The man had a look around the castle ; hundreds of grey stone rooms with slit windows that only had views of mist and rumbles of thunder. A few locked doors but all in all a cold drab uneventful place. IKEA furniture.

The man sat by the small fire. A little D2 robot brought him food, it too was made of skin coloured metal. Canned meat, pickled beetroot slices and mayo sandwiches with a glass of milk that had a hint of red tinged that the man didn’t notice. The first robot stood over the man while he ate. ‘the mistress likes to hunt for mountain pigs in the mist.’ “mountain pigs?? How does she dispatch them?” ‘with her bare hands.’ Answered the robot. The man choked a little and drank some ‘milk'. The castle entrance slowly opened and a small grey haired kindly older lady walked in from the rain. The man glanced at her hands, they were clean. The robot introduced them. They walked into her study. Inside was the painting on an easel, still covered. The mistress sneaked a peak of one corner and giggled in anticipation. She looked at the man. ‘you see the paintings always reflect the man' said the mistress. The man didn’t understand. “I thought you wanted the worst painting I could find?” he asked. ‘yes but your worst.’ Said the mistress. The robot snatched the cover off of the painting. The mistress turned around to take in all of it. The spotlight revealed a mixture of fluorescent paints and pale skin coloured acrylics. A face of a smiling gorgon; scaly skin with fluorescent highlights, BLACK irises, stale breathy strands escaping from it’s mouth of fluorescent pink teeth. ‘OOOOOOO WHAT A GLORIOUS PIGGY.’ The robot said. The man wanted to run. He slowly got up and walked calmly to the castle entrance. He went outside. Outside was a half ring of skin coloured robots blocking the man’s route to the car. It started raining... the skin colours started dripping to reveal patches of stainless steel and shiny red painted manic smiles, demonic red painted noses and arched white painted eyebrows. The paint dripped further revealing stainless steel robot hands. The man stared transfixed, his face expressionless. A mechanical shunting noise came from around a castle corner. A 10 foot heavy lifter contraption walked slowly around and into view: it had a giant red nose on the front and white arched eyebrows. A mega phone speaker inside it announced with an older ladies voice. ‘GET AWAY FROM HERE YOU LIL BITCH.’ The man looked down at his hands... they were glowing with a hint of neon red light. He found his feet and ran, the mist parted to let him through and it stayed parted to let the clowns through.

The end

By Peter Stringer

Geese

Granny Bluddyfords fed her geese. They looked bored she felt. ‘I’ll let them forage in the fields.’ Granny Bluddyfords organic farm was one of the last to convert. Solar powered contraptions now did all the work. Small fidget robots humanely kept the crops free of pests.

Granny Cripplings fed her geese. They looked a bit bored. She let them into her fields for a forage. Granny Cripplings was also one of the last to convert. She too had solar powered pest control.

Granny Bluntscar fed her geese. They also looked a bit bored. She too let them into her fields to forage. Granny Bluntscar was one of the first to convert to organic farming with robots.

Millions of geese covered the fields of Cendiary Bay. The shining white of billions of feathers looked down on the small coastal port of mirrored cube buildings; Every surface of solar panel.

The gaggle of grannies all liked to keep their geese nice and aggressive. The little fidget robots fashioned the geese’s tiny teeth razor sharp, in their sleep.

Two old lads burped and cajoled their way down a lane that runs between Granny Bluntscar ‘s farm and Granny Bluddyford's farm. They hadn’t noticed the mass of white feathers. They were drunk. Millions of goose eyes followed the two older men. One of the older men climbed a wooden stile to get into and cut across a field, he reached the top, looked out at the white masses as far as a drunken eye could see. The second old lad climbed up after him. They both stood there looking at the millions of goose eyes staring back at them. The bottle of red wine in the second mans hand slipped, the first man caught it. Not a drop spilled. They laughed and said “the geese are out again;” climbed down and wandered through the throng of white, on their way.

A rat walked along the top of a dry stone wall that ran between Granny Cripplings and Granny Bluddyfords farm’s. It was terrified. It didn’t want to know what millions of razor sharp goose teeth would do to one scrawny rat body. A rock in the wall dislodged as the rat passed. It crashed down onto the ground scaring some geese. The rat carried on along the wall. A florescent butterfly landed on the fallen rock. The minute vibration this caused cascaded through the rock and deep underground and with an unlikely twist of fate started a rare, for these lands, shockwave. An earthquake rumbled around Cendiary Bay smashing solar panels. Shards of solar panels screeched all over the streets of the modern port town. There was much blood. Granny Bluddyfords fell to the ground at the sight of a blood stained Cendiary Bay. A heart attack.

The dry stone walls, that bordered and divided all the fields, had all shook down into neat little lines: no longer goose barriers. The geese waddled onto the fields with crops and tucked in to crisp green fresh things. At the sight of this, Granny Cripplings had a heart attack and dropped to the floor. The geese gorged themselves on juicy sweet delights all afternoon.

Granny Bluntscar sat drinking tea sweetened with a little evaporated milk. A tear from one eye for her sister, a tear from her other eye for her other sister. A manic smile gleefully looked out onto her new super farm and her newly tripled evil goose stocks.

The end

By Peter Stringer

[tree-fort-journal]

OC Spotlight: Matise

Matise, she's kind, but is more likely to go with the flow then start a revolution. In high-school she was part of the school's "mean girls" clique and would wander the mall after the school amidst a gaggle of other giggling makeup-ed and looselipped girls. She thinks back to times when she and her friends would literally turn their backs on another girl, laughing at them when they walked away, and regrets it. She's since tried to make up for her actions in highschool, a demonstration of her growth and maturity. But, most people that knew her back in high school, even her friends, don't want anything to do with her now.

So she spends her days wandering the beach, talking with her parent's friends and watching over their kids. All of the younger kids think she's insanely cool and it's not unusual to see her walking down the pier with a string of kids behind her. It's earned her the name Mother Goose, which she secretly is very pleased about.

Her skin is a deep brown, the same color as her eyes, but she wears green contacts because she likes them. Both her father and mother were adopted as kids (they met at a fundraiser for a foster program) and don't know what nationality they are. Matise could do a dna test, but she doesn't care enough about it to put forth the effort. To her, she's a member of the town, and that's what matters.

[raphiot]

The Walrus

The garden near the gate of Church Mouse shifted underneath the maid’s fingers, the soil as soft and malleable as clay. The evening rains had softened the ground, and so with the tips of her dress half-dipped in mud, she prepared little beds to tuck the sleeping crowns of dormant strawberries into. Before long, a field of strawberry royalty laid slumbering, not far from the flowerbeds and the sapling peach tree.

The maid girl stood up, brushed off her hands on her white apron, and dug into her pocket for a silver watch. Flipping open the lid, the timepiece told of a midmorning lull. A time when her sister would be taking the first of many breaks from her duties—and the cigarette smoke wafting over from the building’s side entrance confirmed this—and when her master would have finished dissecting her breakfast and, on a good day, gone back to bed.

Sighing, she wiped her brow and pocketed the watch. Hours of working in relative solitude stood before her, as the flowers needed tending, the halls swept, the library dusted and tidied, the details of supper prepared—and her sister was unlikely to be of much help.

Before she could put two feet onto the cobblestone steps that lead into the Gallery, however, the double doors burst open to reveal a tall woman in a sleeping cap and pajamas, patterned with little rabbits leaping over crescent moons. She held with her forefinger and thumb a steaming tea cup, raised in thoughtful trepidation to her mouth. Spotting the muddy maid in the yard, she rose an eyebrow and smiled.

“Goodness, Ethel—I thought to find you planting the strawberries. Ne’er would I imagine you digging a new warren below the Gallery,” she snickered, and took a sip from her cup.

“Lady Beatrix,” the maid addressed her, giving a shallow curtsy. “How did you find your breakfast? Were the pickled goose eggs and blood sausages to your liking? The recipe was new to me, and—”

“Never mind that,” Beatrix interrupted. Draining her cup of tea, she stepped through the garden on her fluffy slippers toward the peach tree. With the teacup held by one finger, she placed her hand against her chin and stared at it a moment, deep in thought.

“Lady Beatrix?” Ethel questioned, her long lop ears pulled by gravity as her head tilted sideways in curiosity.

“Nay—no one, I think, is within my tree. But shouldst they be, ‘twould be high. Or mayhap low?” the Church Mouse hermit mused, tapping the porcelain cup against her lips and looking the sapling up and down. “That is, perchance, they could not attune. Nevertheless, ‘tis no great matter.”

The rabbit maid tiptoed cautiously through the sprouting turnips toward her master, and touched her gently on the shoulder. “Are you quite alright, my Lady? I know it has been a few days since you’ve been outside, and you are not accustomed to being awake at this time of the morning, so...“

“Oh, dearest Ethel. How easy life must be, thine eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see,” Beatrix quipped, patting her servant with an open palm atop her crown. “I do admit, ‘tis difficult, at times, to be as I am. To be someone—yet, time doth push forever on. It matters naught to me.”

“I do not, um…”

“Do for me a favor and humor my musings, wouldst you?” Beatrix asked, staring at the tree. Ethel gave a hasty nod, and Beatrix continued, “Always—nay, only but sometimes—do I think it is but me, amid a quiet dream. A bough of Luna’s tree I have crawled upon, and where I do lay in a long slumber. The Earth far away, and little rabbits to have ne’er found their homes in its holes.”

“I—”

“I should say, I know what is a ‘dream,’ and what is not. That is, I think, I disagree. And as such, my tree is empty,” Beatrix said, taking a leaf of the peach tree between her fingers and feeling its ridges. “Do I live, truly? The question doth weigh upon my mind, though I breathe, and though I eat, and though thine ears do hear my words and responses come in kind. I think I know—but, alas. It is all wrong. The questions, a disquiet doubt. It be not still.”

“What... what are you saying, my Lady? You think me an illusion? That nothing around you is real?” Ethel stammered, her concern palpable. Though the master of Church Mouse was an eccentric, Ethel had always considered her to be of sound mind.

“‘Twas nothing real, shouldst be there nothing to become hung upon. Nay—I am she, as you are thee, as you are me, as we are all together. And here, upon this wet ground, I stand, the walrus in a walled garden. Were I to leave, wouldst I find a burning sun in the dead of night and a giggling gaggle of clamshelled schoolgirls?” the hermit presented her question in a deathly serious tone, and sat her teacup atop the rabbit girl’s head.

“So, you are saying—” Ethel took the cup in her hands to keep it from tumbling to the ground, “You believe yourself to be real, but what surrounds you, perhaps not?”

Beatrix shook her head. “‘Tis an idle musing, nothing more. The pull of Luna would lead me to believe that all I have lived upon this Earth be a dream, and her shores to be the only true life I have within me. A troublesome, tedious thought, ‘tis not? You know it to not be true. Prithee—you do know it, verily?”

The hermit woman regarded her servant with a gaze that conflicted with her confident tone, her cold eyes somewhere adjacent to desperation. Ethel gave a slow nod, unsure what to think, but certain that a delayed response would only make the situation worse. Beatrix drew a deep breath through her nostrils and sighed shortly.

"I shalt be in mine chambers,” she sternly announced, turning toward the double doors of the Gallery. “Pray, Ethel—for tonight’s supper, do instill Matilda with the importance of avoiding setting our kitchen ablaze.”

The oak door to the hermit’s room was shut fast for the remainder of daylight, as silent as a crypt. Ethel went about her duties, cleaning the Gallery from top to bottom. She passed the door again and again as she swept and dusted and flew from one room to the next, straightening cupboards and alphabetizing books in Lunish. She considered knocking a few times if only to reaffirm Beatrix’s well-being, but whatever worries she held for her master were kept in check by the wrath she knew awaited her, should she disturb the hermit’s solitude.

With the night’s meal of vegetable and beef stew, buttered biscuits and tea prepared, Ethel was at a loss for what to do. She sat in a wooden rocking chair in the hall across from Beatrix’s room and waited, her nose buried in recipe book sniffing for simple things to teach Matilda. Just as she’d found a page on an easy peach cobbler, the hermit’s door burst open, and the rabbit girl nearly leapt from her seat.

“Lady B-Beatrix!” she stuttered, standing with startled haste.

The Lunarian woman looked up and down the hall, then down at her fingernails. Her brows shifted in curiosity, as if unsure of what she was seeing. She wore a lavender jacket and gown, the cuffs and hem near her feet stained red. Ethel’s eyes trailed downward—there on the floor was a pool of dark liquid, only just illuminated by the dim light of the nearby lamp. It soaked into the hermit’s fuzzy slippers, their bottoms deeply crimson.

“My Lady... are you quite alright? You look awfully pale, and—”

“Ethel,” the Lunarian curtly cut her servant off, “Fetch your coat and meet me in the garden.”

“Oh... Are you certain? Dinner is prepared. Matilda and I were simply waiting for you...”

“Yes, Matilda. Bring her as well. I shall need witnesses,” Beatrix ordered, her voice monotone.

Without another word, she returned to her chambers and shut the door behind her with a loud clack. Left standing there, Ethel set the book down in her chair and lingered a moment in the hallway, watching dark red liquid seep through the crack beneath the door. She felt her foot thump the floor unconsciously, and made for the dining room in a nervous hurry.

The pines sheltering Church Mouse shook under the wind and rain blowing through the streets, two rabbit girls below them shrouded in hoods. The smaller girl’s face hid inside a cocoon of fuzzy white cotton, but gazed at her sister with an annoyed frown all the same.

“What the hell is taking that crazed moonie? How long do I gotta stand out here in the rain?” Matilda fumed, tugging her hood tight.

“I am not certain—she merely said to meet her here. I cannot deny she has been acting strange; just this morning we had a very odd conversation,” said Ethel, her finger to her chin.

“Oh? She give you that spiel about ‘Lucy in the sky’ again? I swear to God, if I have to hear one more of her stupid poems...”

“It was something about her ‘tree’ being empty. And I believe a walrus was involved? I’m not entirely sure, to be quite forward with you.”

The doors of the Gallery swung wide, the figure of its tall and slim master slipping through the threshold. She had dressed herself in a long, green cloak with a hood, the lavender gown and fuzzy slippers exchanged for a simple brown dress and leather boots. Acknowledging her servants with only a single glance each, she made through the garden with purpose towards the sapling peach tree.

“Lady Beatrix? Are we going someplace, so late at night?” Ethel questioned, her voice a mixture of apprehension and curiosity.

“Verily, we are. There is something I must see—I must know if I am right, and such a chance comes but once a blue moon. Above us, Luna is shone brightly. I must see her again,” the hermit answered, taking in hand a small hedge clipper from her cloak.

“What’re you talking about, crazy lady? Speak sense. If you need to see the moon, just look up, then! Why do I have to get all wet for that?” Matilda grumbled, scowling at her.

“Matilda, open thy ears. If thou dost not know of what one speaks, nor how to appreciate Luna on such a bright and clear night—” Beatrix turned toward her small servant, those cold, unblinking eyes boring holes into the girl, “—then merely keep thyself quiet and do as I say.”

The small rabbit girl shrunk in surprise, her mouth silently agape. Returning to the tree, Beatrix searched the tree’s limbs top to bottom, placing the thin branches between the shears and considering, then moving on to another. She repeated this process several times before finally coming across a bough that split into two smaller branches. Clipping it cleanly from the tree, she carried it to the two obedient rabbits staring confoundedly at her.

“This will do,” Beatrix declared, and handed it to a very confused Ethel.

“Whatever for?” came the servant’s reply, turning the very ordinary tree branch over in her hands to examine it.

“It shalt serve as our link and guide our path,” Beatrix said. She made for the fence gate, undoing the latch and crossing onto the sidewalk. “Do not tarry—we’ve a long journey ahead of us and only so much moonlight.”

The two rabbits looked at one another, bewildered, the hermit’s words only raising more questions in their minds. Ethel’s emerald green eyes quivered with worry, but the perturbed look on her sister’s face spoke clearly she was convinced the exiled Lunarian had finally lost her marbles.

The hermit’s long legs carried her swiftly down the sidewalks, pursuing the end of each street like a woman possessed. The two rabbits hurried after her, in constant danger of being left behind. Beatrix was hardly watching where she was going, her head turned upward to stare at the brightly shining full moon.  They crossed a patch of broken road into a tiny lot preserving a single tree, and descended into the deep, old, forgotten suburbs, past the overgrown, forested train tracks.  

On either side of the street were dilapidated houses, cracking old boards whose painted skin had been long eroded by rain. Yellow eyes leered at them from the dark, curious black cats looking at them behind shaded windows. The streetlights were dim, revealing only a little of the holes in the road and the chunks missing from the sidewalk. Ethel was very careful where she stepped, as it would have been easy to trip over a false spot in the street and fall on her face.

At the end of the road, Beatrix came across a short plain of grass that lead into the surrounding wood. Ethel’s long, sensitive ears could faintly hear the sound of rushing water; they were very near the river.

“Please, Lady Beatrix!” Ethel cried, trying to catch her breath. “Where are we going?”

“Make thyself still. We are nearly there,” Beatrix curtly responded, before taking off into the trees. The two rabbits hurried to follow, Matilda wheezing in exhaustion.

Through a curtain of brush and woods, a wide window of water stared back at them, the moon reflected in its calmly moving current. Beatrix crept to the river’s edge, where she came across a small wooden pier with a little white boat tied in place by a rope. She stepped inside and sat down, and her gaze returned to the glowing white orb in the sky.

“Come, come. ‘Tis a small craft, but there is ample room for the three of us,” Beatrix called to her gawking servants, patting the seat next to her.

The two rabbits exchanged glances once again, with Matilda throwing up her hands in resignation. Folding her arms behind her head, she casually followed the hermit’s path down to the boat.

“A late night boat ride doesn’t sound so bad. I’ll just go to sleep in the boat, and maybe when I wake up we won’t be in this crummy town anymore,” Matilda said, her lack of enthusiasm palpable.

“But...” Ethel murmured, words falling short as she watched her sister climb into the tiny boat.

Ethel sat down next to Beatrix, the boat wobbling in the water as they found their places. She looked to the waving reflection of the moon in the water, and then to her master, frowning.

“The branch, Ethel. Thou didst bring it along, yes?” Beatrix inquired.

Ethel blunk confoundedly and reached into her coat pocket for the sprig. Digging it out, she held it in front of her for Beatrix to take, but the hermit shook her head.

“Taketh in thy hand this end,” she instructed, placing one of the split limbs of the branch in Ethel’s palm, “and Matilda, take the other.”

Matilda grabbed the palmless end of the stick with strained, discontented brows, her eyes flitting back and forth between Ethel and Beatrix. In her mind lurked a sneaking suspicion that she was about to be inducted into the Lunarian’s moon cult and drowned beneath the boat as a lunar sacrifice.

“Gaze at the moon. What dost thou see?” Beatrix commanded, looking skyward.

“Same dumb old rock. What’s the point of this?” Matilda quipped, growing impatient. “I’m tired. Just gonna lay down at the bottom here, if ya don’t mind—whenever Ethel stops pulling my arm. Quit it.”

“I am doing no such thing,” said Ethel, her eyes growing wide.

Their hands gripped on the peach tree sprig, it pulled them toward the moon in the water, tugging their hands subtly this way and that. Neither could be certain it wasn’t the other merely tugging the branch their way, yet neither were truly pulling it.

“Hold it tight. Let it guide you,” Beatrix said, untying the rope from the pier and dropping it into the boat. She took in hand the pair of oars resting at the boat’s bottom and dipped them into the water. “It shalt show us the way.”

The sprig’s long end pointed forward, either with or without the two rabbit servants’ guidance—neither could really say—and tilted toward the reflection of the moon in the water. Beatrix began to row, following after the direction the branch was pointing. The current caught them, and they were soon drifting down the river.

“Oh, the drip of tears flowing from Luna’s eyes. The current is nearby, yea. We need only find it,” Beatrix declared, following the sprig’s movements closely.

“Is that what you call this rain? My ears are getting wet,” Matilda complained.

“The ‘current,’ milady? Is that why we are adrift on the river? And forgive me for saying, but I do not recall any mention of Church Mouse possessing a boat…” said Ethel, her voice a series of concerned squeaks.

“Well. Mayhap it is not my boat, but when opportunity doth come knocking, who wouldst I be to turn it away?” Beatrix said, casually brushing her blonde hair from her face. “Not that it should matter, shouldst my theory be true. There is a place I must again see with mine own eyes, and taste upon my tongue.

“Ethel, know you how the Lunar Emissary camst to this Earth?” she posed a question to her servant, who was a little surprised by the sudden change of subject.

“Not the particulars, I fear. I know it concerned something called the Lunar Flow, as you have told me yourself,” Ethel answered, her free hand to her chin in consideration.

“Just so—she made travel through the Flow and landed in this very river. She wouldst not tell me herself, but there be’est not any other way of making the journey in only a single night. How astute of you to remember.”

“But is that not a simple myth? Forgive me, but I often erred on the side of not taking your stories to their literal meaning.”

Beatrix sighed, her eyelids sinking as though she meant to reach over and slap Ethel’s ears off of her head, if only her hands were not full of oars.

“Be that as it may. Luna and the Earth are connected by the tears the moon doth cry upon us. It is my suspicion that even little Luminous knew not of the how herself, but her masters most assuredly did—for it is the path we sailed to reach Luna’s shores,” Beatrix explained, rowing in earnest. Her eyes followed the sprig closely, adjusting her rowing for each small movement.

“Yes, the tears,” Ethel said, holding out her hand to feel a fat drop of rain land in her palm. “My Lady Beatrix, are you not tired? Might we simply land the boat at the side of the river, here, and go home to our supper? It should still be warm.”

“I must advise against leaving the boat now, Ethel. For if you did, I cannot say what would become of you,” Beatrix said, her lips curling into a wicked smile.

“Wha—” Ethel squeaked. Looking around her, the trees surrounding the river had at same point faded into the dark, the streetlights of the quiet city someplace far off in the distance. Below her, the stars twinkling in the night sky had sunk below the water, itself a sparkling tapestry of tumultuous waves that stretched in a zigzagging ribbon ahead of them, and at its end, a shining white orb, whose soft light warmed the darkness surrounding the tiny craft.

“Where…?! Beatrix, where have you taken us?” the rabbit maid’s voice filled the wet air, a mixture of panic and demand.

“I’m dreaming,” Matilda declared out loud. “This is a dream. I ate some beef stew and went to sleep. I’m going to wake up in my bed soon.”

The smaller rabbit rocked back and forth in her seat, gazing left and right at the void of black that threatened to engulf them from every direction. Reflections of glimmering stars could be seen in her wide, unblinking eyes.

“Do calm thyselves. We are in no danger—not yet, at the very least. Remain still, keep the branch aloft,” the Lunarian instructed her shaken servants, eyes locked onto the sprig.

Silence shrouded the craft. Beatrix rowed tirelessly for what felt like hours, and the brightly lit rock in the distance never seemed to grow any nearer. Ethel shut her eyes for just a moment, exhausted, and felt her shoulder touch Matilda’s, who did not pull away or object, for she was fast asleep in her seat.

The rabbit-girl’s large ears twitched and trembled, detecting an odd, foreign sound. The sound of rolling waves hitting the boat, and the coming tide blanketing a nearby shore. This seemed strange to her, as Church Mouse was many miles from the ocean, and it weren’t the crashing waters of her master’s bathtub escapades, either, for Beatrix never bathed this late at night. She might have stayed there longer, not particularly bothered by the sound of water, if she had not felt something that seemed truly amiss—the soft snoozing of her little sister, pressed against her.

Ethel’s nose twitched up and down as she took in the scent of sea winds. Prying open her eyes, a bright, sandy beach stretched out before her, the tide rolling under the boat and onto the nearby white ground. Looking towards the ocean, her eyes were drawn out past the endless sparkling water, toward the swirling orb of blue, green and white staring back at her from the endless void.

“Beatrix…?” murmured Ethel, her voice groggy, but the only response she would receive was a loud snore from the smaller girl seated next to her.

The boat was lodged into a pocket of sand, and looked to be in no danger of being swept away by the water running up the beach. From the side of the boat, a footprint filled with seawater, followed by another and another that lead up the beach and into a grassy field. The hill beyond was dotted with leafy green trees, sporting pink-orange fruits.

“Peach trees…” said Ethel in a sleepy stupor. Something about the bulbous fruits roused her tired mind, like citrus juice shooting into her brain. “P-peach trees! Matilda! Matilda, wake up!”

The maid grabbed her sister’s shoulder and gently shook her, making distressed squeaks about the moon, the ocean and the trees. Matilda weakly opened her eyes a tiny crack, her green lenses focusing on Ethel for a split second before closing again.

“I’ll clean the warren later...” she grumbled sleepily. “Five more minutes...”

Sighing, Ethel set the smaller rabbit-girl down and folded her arms. I suppose I shall have to find Beatrix myself, she thought. Glancing this way and that, taking in the sights of sparkling waves and leafy trees shaking in the wind, she spotted a light in the distance. Squinting, she could only just make out what appeared to be a large structure jutting up from the horizon. Salient and silver, it stood far above the fields of peaches, like a lighthouse in the distance.

Ethel placed her feet in the sand, turned around to glance at her sister and frowned. Will it be alright to leave her here? I mustn't be gone long. She might hop right out of her skin once she realizes where we are...

From the beach’s edge, grass and trees sprouted in abundance from the white soil, growing thicker the farther Ethel wandered from the beach. The wind was warm, sweeping over her skin as if to wrap her in an invisible blanket. She followed disturbances in the grass, spots where the blades had been pressed to the ground by footsteps. Before long, she found herself completely surrounded by trees whose branches were heavy with peaches.

“Lady Beatrix? Are you there?” she called out, cupping her hands around her mouth to extend her voice. “We mustn’t stay here—what shall become of Church Mouse?”

So many trees. I do wonder if moon rabbits eat nothing but peaches, she pondered.

The trees rustled under the wind, and something hit the ground behind Ethel with a thud. Startled, she swiftly swerved around, reaching into her jacket’s pocket for a silver knife she carried with her—but all that was behind her were ripe fruits, falling from their perches. Nerves tingling, she sighed and wiped her brow, turning back around to follow the footsteps in the grass. A chill crawled up the backs of her ears, and she could not shake the feeling that something was watching her, somewhere among the rustling leaves.

In a small, grassy clearing surrounded by trees, cheery hums and laughter found their way to Ethel’s ears. The tall Lunarian woman was picking out peaches, looking for particularly ripe specimens. When she found one she approved of, she pulled it from its branch and nearly danced back to her cloak, spread out in the grass, to place it with her growing collection of bulbous fruits.

“Lady Beatrix!” called Ethel, rushing over to her hermit master.

“Ethel! Brushed the sand from thine ears at last, have thee? Come, come! Be’est here a wealth of ripe moon peaches. Prithee, partake of one! Savor Luna’s fruit,” she happily responded, thrusting a peach into Ethel’s hands.

“A-alright—but my Lady Beatrix, should we truly be here? We do not belong. And, heavens forbid, what if we are discovered? If anything you have ever said rings true, you are the last person the Lunarians wish to see,” Ethel said, running her fingers over the fruit. It was particularly soft and fuzzy, with a rosy pink coloration.

“My dear spritely hare, live but a little! Get around! Get your feet up off the ground, live a little, get around,” Beatrix said giddily, reciting a poetic mantra. She nearly giggled as she took a bite of another peach, picked directly from a nearby tree. “Oh, to be bough of Luna’s tree... It hath been too long.”

The rabbit-girl blunk several times at the hermit before her, wondering if perhaps she had lost her mind and replaced it with peach mush. Shrugging, she looked down at the pink peach in her hands. It does look awfully appetizing…

Parting her lips, Ethel sunk her front teeth into the fruit, the juices quickly leaking from the holes and dancing on her tongue. As she bit a small chunk from the peach and began to chew, she felt the warm wind wrap around her. The texture was soft, malleable. The taste, sweeter and richer than any fruit she had ever tasted on Earth. And when she swallowed, her stomach tingled in delight, as if her body had at last gained a part of itself that was missing all her life.

“This—it’s delicious,” Ethel said, drawing quick, surprised breaths. “It is like nothing I have ever had before. It’s... otherworldly. Not even the pickled moon peaches we have at the Gallery are anything like this.”

“Yea, they are diluted by time, and the water. This, it is a taste none on Earth have ever known. One that doth tell me, without a shadow of a doubt, I do live and breathe,” Beatrix confirmed, closing her eyes and inhaling deep the air. Sighing, she went on, “Forgive me, ‘twas a selfish thing to bring you here. In truth, we do indeed place ourselves at great risk by merely standing upon Luna’s soil. Shouldst the Lunar rabbits discover us, such terrible things they will do to thee and thine sister, in effort to purge the ‘impurity’ from Luna. And though I cannot die, they shalt find way to have me wishing I could.

“Fret not, howe’er! For the Lunar Flow didst deliver us to the Sea of Rain, a far cry from the Lunar Capital. We are safe, if for a time. Time enough to gather a few fruits, take in the air and be on our merry way back homeward,” said Beatrix, waving her hand before her face as if to ward away her worries. “‘Tis as I did before—as our hands trailed ‘cross the water, our heads trailed ‘cross the sky.”

“Matilda may well shed all the hairs on her head when she finds out where we are,” Ethel murmured, a concerned grumble.

“Where be’est Matilda, anywhom? Where is thy sister?”

“She would not wake, so I left her in the boat. I imagine, by now, she has taken the boat without us and rowed halfway back home.”

“Then let us be off, lest we find ourselves up a muddy creek with nary a paddle,” Beatrix snickered, gathering her peach-filled cloak from the grass.

Ethel took in her arms a number of ripe peaches that had dropped to the ground, stuffing them into the pockets of her coat. Her eyes so focused on the ground, she did not notice the large, lumbering figure before her that had quietly made its way into the clearing and was staring the two of them down. Finding herself in its shadow, Ethel’s eyes slowly traced the creature up from its large, hairy feet, to its round body clothed in leathers. Its wide, rugged arms were covered in white hair, as was its head, save for the pale flesh of its face. She stared at the slits of its nose, half-sunken into its skin, twitching up and down as if trying to smell her.

“✩☾♫,” it spoke, the words from its mouth more akin to crashing cymbals and xylophone notes.

“Beg your... pardon?” Ethel nervously responded, backing slowly away.

“Hare of the Earth,” a voice unknown to Ethel rumbled in her mind, like quaking gravel. “Believe, did not, would see one of you. Not here. Unwelcome. Unnatural.”

Sprouting from the creature’s fuzzy head were a pair of white ears, their tips black. So too were the creature’s beady eyes, black voids with brown centers that stared holes into the rabbit-girl’s skin.

“I see you have made a friend, Ethel. So too, it would appear, have I,” quipped Beatrix.

Quickly glancing behind her, Ethel saw another large, hairy creature approaching the Lunarian woman, with several more entering the clearing behind it. Their clothes were simple, scrapped together leathers, and reminded Ethel of the rags she was made to wear in her home underground. They were soon surrounded by them, faced with dark eyes in every direction. They leered at the two of them, expressions stiff. Ethel gripped the silver knife in her pocket tightly, her eyes flitting back and forth, uncertain of what to do—but Beatrix calmly approached one of them and offered her hand.

“I am Beatrix Potter, known to the Lunar hares as the Lady of Earthly Seas,” she said, giving a bow.

“I’d never heard that before,” Ethel edged in, giving her master a suspicious sidelong glance. “Do they not merely call you ‘the Earthi—’”

“—’Twas I who made journey to Luna long ago with the figure you now call Andromeda. I dwell no longer within the Lunar Capital, howe’er; mine home is the Earth,” Beatrix spoke loudly over her servant, driving her words with dramatic waves of her hands.

The creature before them grunted in dissatisfaction. All around them, the white-haired figures chirped and muttered at one another, their voices like a disorganized band orchestra. Eventually, the one before them shut his beady eyes and nodded at Beatrix.

“Lunarian. Yes. We know of you. Know of the witch-woman, Andromeda. But know not of us, do you,” boomed the deep voice, inside the heads of both hermit and the rabbit-girl. The creature before them continued to speak in gibbering musical notes as the voice invaded their thoughts. “We are they who do not know serenity.”

The hermit gasped, placing her hand over her mouth. Her eyes were troubled, swiftly looking the creature up and down, taking in its features. Then, staring somberly at the ground, she let out the weakest, saddest voice Ethel had ever heard from her.

“I—I am deeply sorry. I knew not the depths of Andromeda’s cruelty. I beg of you your forgiveness; ‘twas I who brought her here. I am the cause of your suffering.”

“Lady Beatrix?” perked Ethel, confused. “What does he mean, ‘know not serenity?’ What matter is that of yours?”

Beatrix did not answer, her hand covering her mouth as she stared at the ground, eyes wide in horror. The figure before them chuttered slow squeaks at Ethel, like it wished to speak to her directly, but Ethel could not understand.

“Hare of the Earth. Alike, we are, you and I. Different, but alike. Born of humans, blessed by Luna, are you. You know of serenity—gifted to you, it was, by your ancestors. Courses in you, it does, from your ears to your toes. See it, we can. But we know it not. Taken from us by the witch-woman. And, so, we appear before you as this.

“Those who would not kneel. Punished, we were. Severed from one another, sent to the darkest, coldest reaches of Luna. To follow Heart of the Sunrise to the Earth, as your ancestors did... a kindness we were denied,” the thoughts pressed their way into Ethel’s mind, and when they were done, the creature before her bowed his head and grimaced.

“Serenity—the ties that bind us to Luna. The many boughs of her tree. Knewest I that Andromeda would sever it from those who did not bend. And yet I did nothing, not ‘till it was much too late. For that, I may never atone,” said a tense Beatrix, her brows tight. “But thou have not lost serenity in its entirety. Verily, how thee speak to us now is the proof of that. Though it is faint, we are connected still.”

The creature nodded at her. “Stolen it back, piece by piece. Taken many rises of the Earth. Silver armors guard the Sea of Serenity, the witch-woman’s treasure. We hide, and we wait.”

Beatrix curled her finger and pressed it to her lips in thought. After a moment of deliberation, she snapped her fingers and pressed her hands together.

“Galahad’s knights! They live still... Mayhap they were made to drink of the Remedium Serenitatem in order to serve Andromeda forever. If she cannot have true, endless serenity, than none shall any. Oh, Annie...”

“Not why we speak. Anger—such anger, the sight of you. Even if you are not they, you look as them. The rabbits who serve Andromeda. Our rage is quelled for only a time,” the voice echoed, the hairy rabbit-creature glowering at the pair. Its eyes calmed, and the voice continued, “There was a rabbit, traveled the seas to Earth. Belief, there is, that she is the capital’s true heir. Before Lunarians. Before Andromeda. Royal blood rests in she. Whispered, it is, that an Earth rabbit protected her. Our rage—quelled only by this. But not forever. Leave. You leave.”

“You... you’re talking about Luminous,” said Ethel, lips agape. “Then, is she here? Is she alright? And—was there a human with her?”

“His fate is most intriguing indeed. Be it too much to hope he hath not been dissected like a frog, I wonder?” Beatrix tilted her head back and forth in thought, then merely shrugged at Ethel.

“Cannot know. Lunar Capital, forbidden ground,” the voice answered. “Leave. Leave before you are found by them. Leave before our rage finds you.”

The wind blew through the trees with enough force to lift Ethel’s ears. The lumbering white creatures slowly drew away into the trees and hills, disappearing one by one. Left standing there in the grassy clearing, the hermit and her servant stared at one another for several moments, unsure of what to make of the situation. Then, heavy with unease and gathered peaches, they gathered themselves and began back toward the boat, eyes lingering on the bright silver tower in the distance.

On a short hill overlooking the beach, Beatrix stopped a moment to look out over the water. The churning tide rose halfway up the beach, the blue Earth in its sparkling reflection. The Lunarian drew in deeply the air through her nose, and exhaled it wistfully slow—as if she might never return.

“Lady Beatrix,” began Ethel, her hands folded behind her back. “I must admit, there were many a time when I believed your stories to be merely fiction, or failing that, a dream. But, now...“

“Aha, but Ethel, canst thee ever truly say whether you wake or sleep? Consider thusly—mayhap all our lives be but a long dream. A dream of peaches and pies, rabbits and people, of Luna and Earth. If it all lie in the realm of fantasy, then I should hope never to wake, lest such wonderful things as little rabbits cease to be,” Beatrix said, shooting her a radiant smile. “Shouldst I ever fret over such frivolous things as reality again, I needs but remember this moment.”

Ethel could not help but smile in return. On that grassy hill over the ocean, she felt an odd warmth as the air filled her lungs. For the briefest of moments, she wondered if she truly did dream, for the moon reminded her much of a place she long called home.

A piercing screech penetrated the rabbit girl’s long ears, each of their short hairs standing on end. The sound came from farther down the beach, high pitched and terrified.

“Matilda!” said Ethel and Beatrix at once, glancing at one another.

Without hesitation, the maid reached into her coat and withdrew the sharp silver knife. Gripping it tightly at the ready, she leapt from her spot and dashed down the beach, each footfall a short striding hop. As her feet sank into the sand and tide, she caught sight of Matilda in the boat, scrambling away from a large, white, hairy figure.

“What the hell are you? Get away from me! I swear I’ll bite your nuts off if you try anything!” Matilda shouted and threatened, her arms grabbing for anything in the boat she could use to defend herself. She floundered backward and fell into the sand, crawling backward toward the water.

Realizing what had confronted her sister, Ethel calmly put away the knife and approached the large white rabbit. It turned around to face her, its beady black eyes rolling over her form as she curtsied.

“Ethel! Do something! That THING tried to grab me! It’s a monster!” Matilda squealed, pointing wild accusing fingers at the large white rabbit as her fearful eyes pleaded with her sister.

“Hello—might you be one of the rabbits that spoke to Lady Beatrix and I before? This is the boat we arrived on. Please forgive us for disturbing your peace. We wish only to be on our way, now,” explained Ethel, her tone smooth and polite.

The creature squinted at her, spoke in deep, foreign notes, and rumbling words invaded Ethel’s mind.

“Wanted only to know. Know, if she knows where she sits. The shores of Luna, not often filled with hares of the Earth. Not welcome. Leave now, leave. While you still have peace.”

Its black eyes shut, it threw back its head and exhaled a long sigh through the slits of its nose. It grunted at the two rabbit girls, one after another, then began to slowly walk away, one lumbering, hairy foot after another.

Matilda, her hands and knees sunk into wet sand, hid motionlessly at the side of the boat until the hairy rabbit creature had vanished beyond the nearby peach trees. Then, she picked herself up from the ground, brushed herself off and sat down in the boat. She gave Ethel a long, wide-eyed stare, and huddled down to hug her knees.

“Are you alright? How long ago did you wake?” Ethel asked, leaning over the boat.

Matilda’s eyes darted up at her, then dove back down to the bottom of the boat, and she quietly murmured something that sounded like, “Wanna go home.”

“Oh, come now. Do you even know where we are?” asked Ethel, holding back laughter.

The smaller rabbit girl turned her head, taking in the sight of the glowing ball of blue and swirling white filling the void beyond the ocean. She stared a moment, then returned to staring at the floor of the boat.

“Wanna go home. Wanna get in bed,” she mumbled.

“I brought you something—it’s a Lunar peach. You really must try it, it’s like nothing I’ve ever had before,” Ethel encouraged, pressing a bulbous fruit toward her sister.

Taking the soft, pink fruit in her fingers, she gave it a cautious sniff. With a growling stomach, she parted her lips and sunk her teeth into its flesh, taking the smallest of bites. Chewing with the greatest of reserve, her eyes popped open to stare agape at Ethel. Taking another bite, and then another, she wolfed down the fruit ravenously, and as soon as she was finished, she leapt from the boat to ran up the beach, turning around in great circles to take in her surroundings.

“Why?!” she shouted at Ethel from across the sand. “Why are we on the moon?!”

“My, my. Thine eyes see truly at last, Matilda. Maketh pilgrimage to Luna we have, verily. The two of you might well be the first Earth rabbits to set foot on her soil,” called Beatrix, taking her time in walking towards the boat.

“You crazy old hag! What if we’re stuck here? What if we can never go back? What if that THING decided it wanted to know what a little brown bunny tasted like?” seethed Matilda, bounding her way back to the boat.

“I apologize for leaving you here alone, Matilda. You were fast asleep, and I did not wish to wake you,” Ethel calmly explained, a hand to her chest.

“Can we just get out of here before that thing comes back? Like, now?!” Matilda demanded, planting her seat firmly in the boat once again. “And gimme another one of those peaches! I’m starved.”

Beatrix pulled one of the fruits from her cloak, turning it between her fingers and analyzing it with a scheming, mischievous smile.

“Nay—we wait until we are safely home within the walls of Church Mouse. For upon our arrival, dear Matilda, you shalt learn to bake a pie.”