#gonna be starting work in a few days so I'm also happi
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Paring: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x fem!Reader
Warnings: implied smut, Hangman being himself, love sick Rooster
A/N: Just a little something I thought of awhile ago for Rooster🩷
If there was one thing about Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw was that he loved you more then he loved flying.
Rooster and you had just got engaged and the two of you could not be happier, that was until he got his orders to return to top gun. Bradley having to return for a mission did put a damper in the wedding plans but thats what you signed up when you said yes to marry a Naval fighter pilot right?
"How would you feel if I came with you" you ask while eating dinner one night
"You mean to San Diego" he looks up from his plate asking
"Yeah why not as long as I have wifi and my laptop i can work from anywhere"
"Baby that would be amazing" he said with a big smile grabbing your hand
"It's settled then after dinner I'll look for flights"
"Why not drive out have a little impromptu road trip, we'll take the bronco" Rooster says
"Even better" you reply
After dinner you begin packing and making preparations for your trip seeing how you only have a few days to get things in order.
3 days later the Bronco is packed, Playlist is made and you and Bradley are on the road heading west to San Diego!
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After a great yet tiring trip you make it! You were able to find housing right off a base that offered short term stays. You pull up to the little house and start to unload your things.
"What do say we go to hard decks for a drink tonight baby" Bradley says wrapping his arms around you "wanna see who else was called for this mission"
"Sounds great hopefully Nat did I miss her" you tell him "let me shower the rest of the road trip off" you say walking down the hall before pausing taking your shirt off you turn to Rooster "you gonna join me fly boy or..." before you could finish your sentence Rooster is already down the all throwing you over his shoulder "have I ever turned you down"
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An hour later you and Bradley are pulling into the parking lot of hard deck. He jumps out and jogs over to open your door and help you out and you both walk in.
"Baby I'm gonna go bathroom then I'll get us a few beers" you tell him "ok baby heres my card" he replied with a kiss and handing you his card
"Bradshaw, is that you? Is this how I find out your state side" Rooster hears Phoenix say while she's playing pool
"Yeah well thought I'd surprise you" He says with a cocky smirk. She then takes her shot and hits him right in the stomach with the pool stick "guess I surprised you back, it's good to see you"
"Its good to see you too" he says then gives her a hug
"How's that girlfriend of yours" Phoenix ask
"Well she's not my girlfriend anymore, She's my fiancé and she's great she's in the bathroom right now, she'll be so happy to see you" he tells her
"No shit you popped the question congratulations"
"Thank you..."
Before Rooster could say anything else another voice from his past comes to his ears
"Bradshaw, as I live and breathe"
"Hangman, you look...good" Rooster says
"Well I am good Rooster I'm very good, in fact I am to good to be true" the cocky pilot says taking a shot at the pool table eyes never leaving Roosters
Rooster just rolls his eyes at the cockiness of his fellow pilot, as the group starts talking about the mission they will all soon be on.
Meanwhile you walk out of the bathroom and over to the bar and wait your turn to order. You look over your shoulder and see your fiancé and he sends you a wink.
It still amazes you that after all this time he still gives you the same butterflies as he did the night you met.
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As Rooster is still talking to his friends he see y/n at the bar and sends her a wink, little did he know Hangman also saw y/n at the bar and wanted to prove how good he was. The problem was he didn't know who she was but he was about to find out...
"Well look what just walked in" Hangman says and everyone looks over to the bar
"Yeah thats..." Phoenix starts to say but is stopped by Rooster
"Damn that girl is fine" "look at that ass" Rooster hears Cody and Fanboy say. Rooster just smiles to himself. Nobody had ever met Y/n or even knew about her but Phoenix
"And Rooster I'm about to show you just how good I am. If you'll excuse me I'm bout to go by a beautiful lady a drink and get a number" Hangman says walking away towards the bar
"Aren't you gonna stop him" Phoenix ask
"Nope he'll find out real fast that my girl can take care of herself" Rooster says with a smirk.
Back at the bar you are still waiting for the bartender when you hear a voice beside you
"Well what brings a gorgeous woman like you in a navy bar" you turn and look and see it's one of the pilots Bradley was just talking to.
You shoot Rooster a look and he just winks and that let's you know you can have some fun.
"What can I say I love a man in uniform" you say in a flirty voice. "So you gotta name mr navy"
"Jake but my callsigns Hangman"
"So a pilot even better" just then the bartender makes it your way
"What can I get you ma'am" he says
"2 coronas with lime please" you go to give him the card Bradley gave you when a hand stops you "I'll take care of it" jake says handing the man his card.
"Well thank you flyboy" you say
Hangman continues to flirt and throw his best pick up lines your way, you are trying hard not to laugh. The bartender comes back with your beers and you pick them up but not before Jake throws his arm around you.
"So what about you give me your number" he says "we can go out one night what do you"
Neither you or Jake saw but that was it for Rooster it was funny but he isn't gonna let any guy touch his girl
"You know..." you start to say as you try to move his arm when you hear Roosters voice behind you
"Hangman"
"Can we help you Rooster" Hangman says again in a cocky voice with a smirk
"Yes you can get your arm off my fiancé" He says with a cocky smile while Jake's smile falls from his face
"No way Rooster this girl is to hot for you" jake says laughing til he finally looks and sees the ring and the dog tags around your neck how did he not see any of that before he thinks to himself then pulls his arm off you.
"Yeah but thanks for the beer man, come on baby Nat is dying to see you" Rooster says grabbing your hand and tipping his beer bottle to Jake
"It was nice meeting you" you say hopping down off the bar stoll with a wave leaving Jake standing there speechless.
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"Nat I'm happy to see you I missed you" you say hugging Phoenix
"I missed you too I can't believe you didn't tell me you got engaged to this man"
"Its been less then a month I haven't told many people yet plus I never know how to get ahold of you"
"Baby let me introduce you to everyone this is Coyote, Payback, Fanboy, Bob," just as Rooster is introducing you to everyone Jake walks over "and you met Hangman" he says with a laugh
"Nice to meet you all and Hangman thanks for beers" you laugh and everyone joins in
"That was a mean joke" Hangman says
"Sorry how bout next round on Bradley and me" you say as a peace offering
"Deal" he says
A few minutes later you are getting another round for everyone when you hear the sound of a piano. You don't even have to turn round to know who's playing it
"You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain
Too much love drives a man insane
You broke my will, but what a thrill
Goodness gracious, great balls of fire
I laughed at love 'cause I thought it was funny
You came along and you moved me honey
I've changed my mind, this love is fine
Goodness gracious, great balls of fire"
You walk over and sit on Roosters lap while he sings.
Kiss me, baby, you kiss his cheek
Ohhh the feels good
Hold me, baby
Well, I'll still love you like a lover should
You're fine, so kind
Got to tell this world that you're mine, mine, mine, mine"
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You get home that night a little tipsy and very touchy
"So wanna have some fun Lieutenant Bradshaw" you say stripping your clothes off
" I love when you call me Lieutenant" Bradley says running his hands down your hips to your ass
"Well Lieutenant have your way with me"
" On one condition...you leave the dog tags on" he says kissing down your neck
"Yes sir"
#bradley rooster bradshaw#rooster x reader#miles teller#glen powell#top gun hangman#top gun maverick
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22/10/2023
#daily bunny#295#standalone bunny#happi lil guy#gonna be starting work in a few days so I'm also happi#c:
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hey
#so i've been dealing with some irl stuff recently#nothing too bad. it was just really frustrating and exhausting for me. and really putting a damper on my mood and my art#and i'm sorry if i've been acting a little weird or not saying too much or anything#or if i've been kinda inactive for the past few days#but i'll be okay!#i just wanted to let you guys know what's been kinda going on#i'm slowly working on something really sweet involving Hugo and Noa. so that's been making me feel better#i need something happy and soft between them lol#also! I've been playing The Quarry recently!#the writing is kinda stupid and almost all of the characters act like they don't have a brain. but that's what makes it so fun!#and i'm pretty sure the devs did that intentionally. to make it seem more like a campy monster flick#i'm really enjoying it so far! the werewolves are really cool!#also it's really funny to me how they just pop like balloons whenever they're transforming#i thought it was gonna be a slow transformation. but no. their skin just immediately explodes off#and then they somehow get it all back when they turn back into humans? idk how that works but it's pretty rad#also also! the thing with the tarot cards is really cool!#i missed a lot in the beginning because i didn't know what i was looking for#and the fortune teller lady in between chapters kept getting mad at me for not finding any#but i eventually started to get it! when the game decided to really put one in my face in chapter 3 lol#and the thing with the tarot cards representing the different characters in the game got me thinking about what card Noa would probably be#i think Seven of Swords would be right up her alley#because it's associated with deception. dishonesty. betrayal. and acting strategically#and it could also signify self-deception and confessions. which is all very true for her character#aaahh now i wanna make a tarot card design for her!#but that's an idea for another day#anyway sorry for sorta rambling a bit#i hope you all are doing okay
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I have had it with these motherfucking spam bots on this motherfucking site.
#personal#tumblr stuff#vent post#spam bots#i've been getting like 1000 spam bot followers a day for the last few days and blocking them all is getting--dare i say--TEDIOUS#wake up. block 300 bots. go to work. come home and block 500 more bots. spend evening checking tumblr to block bots. it's becoming a chore#it's starting to feel like I offended the tumblr gods or something. this is ridiculous. but like hell will i let them win#i won't let my follower count be 50% bots. i feel like a deserve a tumblr badge or something for fending off so many bots.#tribble#the trouble with tribbles#a very apt metaphor i think for these bloody spam bots; block one and five more come to take its place#but upside: the spam bots are helping me compile a Rosetta Stone for the word 'Untitled'. woo#also if you just joined tumblr and want to follow me: for the love of god personalise your bloody blog#i don't care if you have a icon or a summary. if your blog and likes are empty i'm blocking you#because i don't trust empty blogs and i really don't have the time to sort out who's real or not right now#(though if the blog's offering free mp3s 'just click the link!' or is advertising US keto gold coast gummies i know for sure it ain't real)#but hey! good news to people who followed me in the last four days who haven't been blocked; you passed the blog captcha test#anyway just had to get this frustration out of my system; gonna go block some more bots now i guess. i'll be very happy when this stops
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Song of the Day: April 15
"Something in the Way She Moves" by James Taylor
#song of the day#it's been two weeks + two days since the last song of the day#the issue is you see that I started the songs up again in December because my insomnia was fucking up my perception of time#and I wanted some kind of regular marker to help me keep track#and then what happened two weeks + two days ago is that I lost all track of time and subsequently the songs of the day failed#I'm gonna see if I can keep up again for a bit now that I've re-restarted without an alarm on my phone#but if I miss any this week I'll just give in and turn the alarm back on#updates from the last two weeks are going to sound so chaotic let's see#I got a new project at work /and/ I got demoted /and/ I got added to a higher access level /and/ I'm in charge of a new database#yes all of those things together. I'm to be an accountant now! not instead but in addition to my other stuff. should be interesting#I didn't get April Fools off like I was scheduled to because all my scheduled vacation got unapproved#(I was here for about twenty nonsequential minutes to boop people and I'm glad I made time for it. extremely fun to boop)#I lied shamelessly to get eclipse day off and we went on a full-day roadtrip and it was wonderful. everything I dreamed and more#I killed one of my baby succulents through clumsiness and rabbits ate my pea plants but my sage and cabbages look promising#got a massive pot of mint flourishing on my porch and the horseradish is gorgeous#got Duncan lights and plants and a filter system for his frog tank but we haven't set up the substrate yet#so there's just potted plants sitting inside a terrarium. very amusing honestly#I've been playing a little Stardew and eating a /lot/ of hot sauce and tofu#drinking tons of klass aguas frescas--especially the soursop one. holy shit is it good. the mango and hibiscus also#and these past few days I've been sleeping better#for most of those two weeks I was getting a handful of twenty-minute naps each workday and then crashing unwillingly on the weekend#I haven't read any comic books since February :'( this weekend we're going to costco and then I'm reading comics until Monday#what have y'all been up to? I've missed being around#edit: oh shit the actual song part. anyway this is James Taylor! makes me happy and helps me settle. good vibes songs#I'm half-panicked about work all the time recently and then also today was tax day (Nick's taxes. blegh)#James Taylor doing some heavy lifting round here
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are you going to make gifsets of each semifinal's entries? or have you already posted something similiar?
I'm planning on making a few gifsets/edits for the semi finals but I'll probably only post them near the contest date
#I am not very ahead for the countdown series because I was away for a few days for a little vacation#so if I can do those faster I can also start on other things#the good news is that I'm gonna have more time to do them and to enjoy eurovision in general#the bad news is that my free time is because I'll be unemployed after next week yay#that was fun to find out after coming from vacation!#to be fair it would be equally or more fun (lol) to find out before so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#and ''it's gonna be fine'' because in theory I have ''potential to do better''#very annoying to be told that tbh my potential has led me nowhere of note#why do I even have to fulfill my potential anyway would that even make me happy#the science world doesn't need me!#I really don't need a high skilled job to be happy#(I wasn't let go because they weren't satisfied with my work my position will just cease to exist)#(which isn't totally surprising because they've been trying to phase it out for over a year now)#and now I have to find a new job?? in this economy??#what if the people are Bad#what if there isn't a cool middle-aged single woman for me to desperately want to befriend#and now I'm supposed to stay at home with my mom all day?? doing chores?? cooking lunch every day for my dad and brothers?? 🤢#I'm sorry rasmusiscute this is not the information you asked for#I will be making gifsets for the semifinals at some point#I'm not sure of anyone else has done already but I'm sure others will too
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JOB ACHIEVED. FINALLY
#it's only 16-ish hours a week and the pay kinda sucks BUT it's a job and it's a job I can do without killing myself so#$600/month is miles better than $0/month let me tell you#and I'm probably gonna apply for food stamps as well which will help a lot. then I can save a lot more bc I'll have smaller food budget#but god I'm so happy like. $400/month to my parents is going to make such a huge difference#like that'll make up the difference in bills PLUS give us enough extra grocery budget to eat actually good meals#like we've been surviving on mainly canned tuna and white bread and like. very cheap dinners#like the most vegetables we eat is when we have cheesy brocoli rice for dinner rip#I miss when we had curry and pesto pasta and homemade lo mein and stir fry and egg rolls...#we used to have vegetable heavy meals almost every day and now it's just sadness#recently I was craving vegetables so bad I drank a v8. I normally hate that shit but that day it was delicious#(tbc I hate it as a drink but it makes a fantastic ingredient for like. chili and stuff)#anyway all this to say vegetables are on the horizon!!! as are having little treats and stuff!!#also also the vocational rehab place FINALLY called my mom back (apparently the person in charge of returning messages#got fired because they just. weren't doing their job for months 💀)#so my sister is gonna start the process of working with the vocational rehab ppl to get her a job too#which is good bc like. she needs it she really does. she's the kind of person who NEEDS a reason to get out of bed or she just. won't.#and she also hasn't had a job since high school and she only had it for a few weeks before they fired her for a stupid made up reason#(really it was ableism but it was a trash company anyway. glad covid put them out of business. good riddance)#ack these are really long tags sorry but. I'm happy!!!!#shit has been so bad for so long and I finally have a tangible thing I can point to and say look!! it's getting better!!!
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When you haven't written anything in like 2 or 3 weeks, a sudden burst of creativity that ends with you writing 573 words and ending the scene you'd been working on in your crappy lil story feels like a victory.
...of course the burst doesn't last but hey, any progress is good progress, right? And maybe that'll make working on this easier, too. Today isn't over yet, maybe the juice will come back, and even if it doesn't, I'll take a win, no matter how small.
#writing#writing thoughts#I typically write my fanfic at work (look the library is pretty quiet)#(and I know for a fact my coworker is also doing stuff on ao3 while we're all at the desk so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)#and it's not as easy for me to get the juice flowing at home#even when I'm working from home#but I really want to get another of these Kingsley oneshots done before the end of the year#and then start on the next one#(this is him during the first trip to Nicodranas and him deciding he wants to be a pirate btw)#(it was gonna also be like his first few weeks at sea but I think that's gonna be another one instead)#(I need to do some boat research and figure out how to write Orly)#i was going somewhere with this. yes. anyway. I'm just happy I actually got something typed out.#I want to keep the momentum going#(partly because I know so many cool good writers and I wanna be able to at least have something new down you know)#I like writing. I do! I'm just bad at it from a technical standpoint#so today was a good day. tiny victories!
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Month 5, day 29, *Cuff voice* We're getting closer!
Closer to what? To coloring in the tail and mug while they move! :D Just a few more!!! So close!!!!
#the great artscapade of 2023#art#my art#my animation#forspoken fan animation#forpoken cuff#I've only written a little bit this weekend u_u#I mean that's fine I was gonna spend today just doing whatever the heck made me happy#and that meant playing Forspoken and taking pictures all day XD#but I still wanted to get more writing in than I did#I'm still trying to work out how I want the post-game self-insert isekai fic to go#I've got so many questions I need to make up my own answers for because I'm not likely to get them out of canon ):#and that's what's tripping me up#it's a ton of fun don't get me wrong!#I love trying to figure out solutions to these problems that make sense with what we know in canon#but I also want to stop PLANNING and start WRITING#first world problems XD#I know darn good and well that I'm just going to start off with random scenes that I want to do and put them in order later#and that I won't start writing anything in order until I get a few of those scenes down#but right now I have so much up in the air that if I try to write anything I get caught on all these questions I don't have answers to#the hard part is deciding what those answers are going to be#and one of those questions!!!! is ''what's the plot?''!!!!!! WHICH IS USEFUL TO KNOW YOU KNOW?!?!?! XD
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PROJECT PARTER HCS (he wants you so bad) haikyuu
ft: aran, kita, atsumu, osamu, suna
ATSUMU:
HES TRYING!!! but is it successful? (no)
literally cannot shut up the entire time you two meet up but it's ok because he's funny
"hey you wanna see pictures of my teammates" "yeah sure" he pulls out a blurry .5 of suna's nostrils
offers you protein bars and osamus leftovers as snacks
compliments you on literally everything
you wrote two words? he starts cheering and clapping his hands like you're shakespeare presenting a new play
loves pretending to be your strict teacher whenever commenting on your work
makes up for his lack of preparation by making you laugh and flustered
"i think you can add a little more to this part" "you look so sexy calling me dumb"
if you two meet up at a cafe he ALWAYS!!! pays for you
started off as a mistake because he asked you for your order in front of the barista
but he thought for a moment and decided you're worth an extra $5 out of his wallet
always loses his pencils but has dozens of erasers?????
SWEARS by wooden pencils. he sees a mechanical pencil and jumps 5 feet into the air and starts screaming
last few days of the project he looks constipated every time you two are together
"do you need a diaper" "I WANT YOU"
you accept his confession because you unfortunately like him back and because you want a good grade
also because you don't want him pooping his pants
ARAN:
the sweetest!!
always asks how you're doing before pulling out his notes
digital note taker 100%
loves loves loves writing with erasable pen and only uses pencils for exams
is a "let's work on everything together" kinds guy
he says it's to make sure there aren't any disagreements in content and aesthetic (he just wants to talk to you)
if you guys aren't at your house, always offers to walk you back!!!
great academically but if you're making a poster or slideshow do NOT let him decorate it... pls watch out
"does this look good!" "i'm gonna hold your hand when i tell you this..." "omg you want to hold my hand 😍"
starts giggling to himself in his head whenever you guys accidentally touch
you catch him staring at you one day and you don't know what to say so you just stare back
he thinks its so romantic
you're just confused but go along with it
after presentations you think you guys are gonna go back to being friendly classmates but he finds you after class and asks you out :)
KITA:
ACADEMIC WEAPON TEACHERS FAV EVERYONE LOVES HIM
"do you want to read my notes?" he pulls out 5 notebooks with everything color coordinated, sticky tabs, perfect handwriting, and factually correct
he can sit and work for 5 hours straight and still somehow have perfect posture
first time you asked him for help on something you were about to piss yourself because you thought he would call you stupid and send you to hell
he gave you a small smile and started walking you through it with an unmatched level of patience
that was the moment you folded and had to physically restrain yourself from grabbing his cheeks and kissing his face
always offers you tea when you come over and brings out a small tray of snacks
"are you comfortable? do you need any help?"
is suuuuper meticulous but kind with his 739273 different corrections
he swears by the sandwich method of compliment-critique-compliment
"your analysis is amazing in this section but i think you can expand a little bit after because..."
you're the one who confessed first because you thought you would explode from cuteness aggression if you didn't
and also because you thought even if he did reject you, he'd do it in the most painless way
was super happy and bursted into a bright red face but shy smile!!
still told you to go back to the assignment though...
SUNA:
menace i hate him (no i don't)
literally doesn't understand anything that's going on and probably doesn't process what you're saying at first
realizes you're serious about this assignment and forces himself to lock in
asks a BUNCH of questions and jots them down on a google doc
loves to make random conversation when you two are working
actually insane gossiper
nosiest birch you know
allergic to minding his own business that mf has shit on everyone
are you slightly scared of what he has on you? yes. do you still want to hear everything he knows? yes
"i'm taking this info from page 175 of the textbook" "got it, but did you hear that kato is trying to get with his exs best friend??"
leaves notes on your project that are both unserious and encouraging
"omg u are literally einstein"
folds origami when bored
will give you paper cranes, frogs, foxes, and cats whenever you see each other
you discovered that there's small doodles in the posts it's he uses to make them
one day there's your name and his surrounded by hearts like the corny mf he is
confronted him and it and he was just like "oh you found that? well, do you want to go out with me?"
he was NOT SLICK with the way he skipped home and whistled to himself that day after you said yes
OSAMU:
HES TRYING HIS BEST!!! (pt. 2)
can only meet up after school because of volleyball so he offers to cook for you before starting to work
takes notes in class but doesn't understand half the stuff he jots down
writes actual bullshit but half a page in decides to abandon his pride and ask you for help
leans in a little too close whenever listening to what you're saying
tries to make sure your knees are touching and that it's all an accident when your fingers brush (he prepared each scenario in his head before sleeping the night before)
down bad LOSER
spends his time doing his portion of the project while sneaking glances at you
doesn't know how to decorate presentations for the life of him so he is on doodle duty
gives surprisingly good suggestions and takes your corrections to heart
one of the best project partners because of how willing he is to learn and contribute!!! (also because he wants to impress you)
talks shit about his brother to you
atsumu has walked in while osamu was telling you an embarrassing story
they start fighting
osamu gets super embarrassed when you laugh at him
then gets overly confident when you tell him you were rooting for him
will not stop dumb smiling whenever he sees you after that
asks you out after the project is turned in with his hands in his pockets with how they're shaking so much
#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu#haikyuu crack#haikyuu x reader#hq x reader#haikyuu headcanons#atsumu x reader#suna x reader#osamu x reader#kita x reader#aran x reader#miya atsumu#miya twins#miya osamu#suna rintarou#kita shinsuke#aran ojiro#inarizaki#inarizaki x reader
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so i don't know if this is a post i'm gonna keep up cause, like i said, i don't really like talking candidly about aspects of my personal identity often these days, and lord knows i especially hate talking about legal identity and all the dissonance that entails. but this week was a pretty big one for me and i can't shake the desire to share my enthusiasm for even just a fleeting moment.
my name has been a sticking point in my mind for a long time. i've adopted many different ones. first, middle, last, you name it. i've been searching most of my life for a moniker that represented my true self socially, and a surname to distance myself from someone in my life who hurt me very badly and never really learned how to stop.
obviously for a long time now I've been Penny Parker to 98% of people who know me, and for the past couple that number has been bumped up to a solid 99% with a few stragglers. it's a name that is so mundane and assumed at this point that tbh I've even come to resent certain aspects of it. which to me is actually beautiful. i find that mundanity, that nuance, extremely telling of how it encapsulates my life. it's a fully three-dimensional reflection, smudges and sparkles and everything in between.
of course, i only just moved out on my own 3 years ago. and unfortunately that had to be the starting point to make this social and personal progress i've been sitting on for half a decade at least now official, tangible, legal. i've been playing a game of catch-up i didn't sign up for, but it's one that does have a silver lining in that i feel more in resonance with who i am and who i want to be than i ever did before being granted this independence.
and as of this week, i have the pleasure of entering an era of my life where the dissonance between who i am in speech and who i am in contract is nonexistent. my name is Penny Olivia Parker. i'm the same as i've always been, but getting better every day at it. soon i'll even have a license to match!
sometimes more of an Olivia Parker in brief moments nowadays tbh but i haven't worked out the details yet. nothin you need to stress over, ill take care of it. the full set is just fine and legally recognized, which is all i've wanted for as long as i can remember.
this isn't the end of my journey, both excitingly and unfortunately haha, but this is yet another huge milestone for me and in certain respects it's one of the biggest i've managed. i'm so happy to still be here. if you're reading this, thank you for being here too.
also those of you who watched my direct reactions the other day might have a little more insight as to why i was so emotional that the day after a judge signed my legal name change a new game by the Sonic Mania devs was announced called "Penny's Big Breakaway" LOL, it was a lot to handle for me but i wasn't sure how much i wanted to say just yet.
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for more logan angst, would you consider doing a "one year later" or something like that follow-up to dbf!logan and the i love you fight?
i miss you, i'm sorry-dbf!logan howlett x fem!reader
part one
456 days after
everyday your words haunted logan. he could picture you with tears in your eyes so clearly. he still went down to your fathers bar; needing something to cope. you left shortly after the fight, using the money you had saved up from working at the bar to get an apartment a couple towns over. there needed to be distance between you and logan but it seemed that no where was far enough.
logan knew every tiny detail about your life since you left. your father shows him pictures of how you decorated your apartment and tells him about the new boyfriend you've got. he should be happy; you got out before logan could get you hurt. instead, he's been drinking himself to sleep most night. your favorite bra and sleeping shorts still sat in his bedroom dresser, untouched but they still smelled like you.
"she comes home next week." your father says, pouring logan another glass of whiskey. "her mom and i are throwing her a small welcome home party, you should come by."
as if logan wouldn't feel more like a dick, he had also drove you away from your parents. always coming up with an excuse for why you can't come visit.
"i'm not sure–"
logan was cut off by your father again.
"c'mon, bud. i don't wanna be the only guy there." he jokes, excited to see you but just maybe not your friends that your mom invited.
"uh, sure." logan sighs, taking another swig from the glass. he desperately hoped that your father would forget or that logan could come up with some excuse.
════ ⋆★⋆ ════
your thumbs drum anxiously at the steering wheel as you drive down your old street. the nerves were finally hitting, too late to turn back like you had many times before. all of your friends cars sat in the driveway, you can't cancel on them again.
logan could smell you before you even got out of your car. he's down in the basement with your dad and a few of the guys from the bar. his mind was anywhere except present as he focused solely on you.
"that should be her, fellas." your dad smiles, getting up to greet you upstairs with the others. "i'll be back."
logan finished his beer and wondered if he should sneak out or fake some emergency. was he even ready to you again? how would you react?
"hey, logan? could you come help bring in some bags?" your father yells down the stairs.
"logan?" your voice was shaking at the mention of the man who shattered your heart.
this isn't the time to be crying. just get through dinner and then you can drive home; tell them you can't stay the night. fuck, what were you going to do?
"welcome home, sweetheart." logan mumbles with a slight nod, walking past you and out the door.
it was hard to mask your anger. one of your friends pours you a glass of wine and brings you to the living room, away from logan. your dad and him bring in your suitcases and sit them in your old bedroom. all of it felt like when you step off a roller coaster; dizzy, slightly confused, wanting to go again.
at the table, your mom asks about your new boyfriend. logan couldn't stand you going on and on about how great this guy was. so great that he's too busy to come home with you.
"so, do you think he's 'the one'?" one of your friends asks.
"um... i'm not sure." you shrug, catching logan's eye. "but i know he loves me and that's all that matters."
you might as well shot logan in the chest with that one.
════ ⋆★⋆ ════
one too many glasses of wine and two beers later, almost everyone was starting to clear out. everyone except for logan. he's not sure why he didn't leave sooner. perhaps it was your presence that made him stay. even if you were pissed at him still, you were still here, still near him.
"i'm gonna go get more beer from the garage." you tell your friends, stumbling a little to your feet.
the truth was that you needed some air. too consumed by logan's heated gaze. you made it down the porch steps before you heard the screen door open and close.
"i don't need any help." you call out over your shoulder.
the foot steps sounded much closer by the time you flicked on the light switch.
"don't you think you've had enough to drink tonight?" logan asks, shutting the garage door behind him.
"i can drink however much i want." you slur slightly. "i am an adult after all ."
"i know, you're an adult."
"are you sure? because wasn't it just a little over a year ago that you were still treating me like a child?"
"if you don't want to be seen as a child, then don't act like one."
"fuck you, logan." you hiss, slamming the fridge door.
"oh sure, it's fuck me for sayin' the truth." logan rolls his eyes.
"it's fuck you for breaking my heart."
"do you think that you didn't break my heart by leaving?"
"i left because you told me to go!" you cried, finally letting the tears flow. "i said i loved you and you got scared like a little kid."
"i got scared because you shouldn't love someone as fucked up as me." he snaps, voice becoming strained.
"did you serious think i didn't know?"
logan looks at you stunned. how did you...?
"you talk in your sleep. it wasn't hard to piece together after that." you answer with sigh. "your mutation doesn't scare me."
there's a moment of silence between the two of you. logan steps forward, touching a lock of your hair; vanilla body wash flooding his senses. he's missed you so much.
"your stuff is still in my drawers." logan whispers. you know what he means; he's never been good with expressing his emotions but you always could tell what he meant. "want ya' to come home, sweetheart."
logan's rough palm moves up to cup the side of your face. your torn between shoving him away or pulling him closer. without a second thought, you nuzzle into his touch. old habits die hard.
"i can't." you tell him.
"yes, you can–"
"no. you don't love me, lo."
"i do, i want to be with you." logan begs, fighting off his tears.
"you love when i'm in bed with you or when we listen to records and do cross word puzzles together, but you are not in love with me." you tell him, lightly removing his hand from your face. "i can't be with someone who hides from me, someone who can't even say out loud that they love me. i'm sorry, logan."
you grab the case of beer and walk past him one last time. it was hell to leave him there but even logan knew he deserved it. he wasn't worthy of your love then and he defintely wasn't worthy of it now. you dodged the bullet that would leave him here to bleed out.
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett#james logan howlett#wolverine x reader#hugh jackman wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#logan howlett smut#wolverine angst#logan howlett angst#logan x reader#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett fanfiction#logan wolverine#old man logan#old man logan x reader#wolverine fluff#wolverine one shot#wolverine x oc#wolverine#wolverine smut#marvel cinematic universe#marvel#marvel mcu#mcu#wolverine x you#x men oc#x men comics#x men#x men wolverine
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a slight miscalculation - pt. i
pairing: Joel x F!Reader
word count: 8.3k
summary: Sarah is off to college, and Joel is about to be living in an empty nest. They road trip out together, and as she spends her first night in her new apartment, he's staying in a nearby hotel. Letting go of his inhibitions for the first time in a long time, he tumbles into a one night stand that becomes very complicated, very quickly.
content/warnings: smut, age gap, mycologist!reader, dick sucking, implied pussy eating, fingering, no outbreak au, reader likes to hike, reader also infodumps, joel miller has a big cock, he also has anxiety, reader has anxiety too, and a cat, reader is in early 20s--exact age not established, one (1) use of daddy, alcohol and weed consumption, joel is a diligent condom wearer, set in present day, discussion of girl scout cookies, joel is sweet and soft and hasn't been eviscerated by the death of his daughter
a/n: I'm intending this to be about five parts. This may change, but right now it's looking like five. I've been struggling to write for a while, unable to focus, but I think I'm back at it? as always, your feedback is hugely appreciated, and i'm kissing all likers and commenters and rebloggers deeply and with tongue 🩷
check out pt. ii
For the first time in nineteen years, Joel is completely adrift. Sarah's starting college in just two months.
It's the kind of realization that hits him like a bucket of ice water, a sudden shock and then an unpleasant trickling of anxiety wrapping about him in nasty tendrils. And then he feels guilty, because he's so, so happy for Sarah because he knows that she's thrilled, but fuck she's gonna be two time zones away and now what's Joel meant to do on Thursday movie nights when he's here without her?
It's terrifying, and it's new. And it's not that he's new to anxiety. He's usually anxious, and he has the Sertraline on his bedside stand to prove it. But if his general anxiety baseline usually hovered around a 6.4, where he was at now far surpassed a 10. It felt exponential, and totally exhausting.
When he voices his fears to Tommy, to Joel's horror, Tommy just doubles over in laughter.
"Jesus, Joel," he wheezes, wiping fake tears from his eyes in exaggerated movements, "You looked so serious I thought you were gonna say you'd killed someone."
Joel scowls. "The fuck you laughing for?"
"She's going to college, it's not like she's dying!"
"How'm I gonna be there for her? What if she needs me? What if-"
"Joel-," Tommy pats him gently on the shoulder, "She can always call you, and you can always call her. And we both know she's got a good head on 'er shoulders."
Joel snorts in concession. "Yeah, yeah. Better than yours and mine put together, and then some."
"Exactly." Tommy agrees, "And if there's ever anything that really goes wrong, you got me. We can drive out together and make sure she's okay."
Joel nods and feels the tiniest bit of tension leave him. One step at a time.
Just over nineteen years ago he found out he was about to be a dad. Suddenly, he had a purpose. Having a kid at twenty-two wasn't something he'd ever intended, but somehow he knew he loved his baby girl from the moment he knew she was a possibility. He spent a solid seven months running around, hustling, doing everything he could to get the very best for his kid. He'd take on doubles, working himself to the bone to make sure they had the best crib, and the best stroller, too. He was thrilled and terrified and so, so green.
Now, his heart feels so big he doesn't know how to handle it. His baby girl is an honest-to-god adult, moving out and going to college, and he has no idea what he's gonna do with his time now.
He has work, of course. But beyond that? He's really gotta to widen his circle, he realises, because who's he gonna hang out with? His brother?
He'd only just turned forty-one and had absolutely not come to terms with an empty nest--the few friends from high school he'd kept in touch with were so much further behind than him. The ones that had kids had them later in their twenties and thirties, and now they're raising middle schoolers while Joel's kid is a real fucking person, leaving home and everything. All the scrapping and saving he'd been doing since before Sarah was born–for his little girl to be able to follow any dream she chose–it was finally paying off. The precocious young woman she is, she graduated early and spent nearly a year working retail to save up some cash. She'd applied to colleges all across the country, and a few international ones, too. Joel had been crossing his fingers for months, hoping she'd choose something near Austin, but cheered with her all the same when she got her acceptance letter from Oregon State University. The previous summer, just before she'd started her applications, she and Joel and Tommy spent a miserable, wonderful week hiking round the Pacific Northwest. She fell in love with it, and the university offered a few of the majors she wanted to consider.
Joel didn't know what he'd do with his baby girl so far away, his life, his reason, but he sure as hell wasn't gonna tell her that. He will not clip her wings. His baby's gonna change the world and he's not gonna hold her back. He is, though, gonna require regular phone calls and check-ins and god they grow up so fast.
"Y'all should road trip out there," Tommy suggests one night over the dinner table.
Joel knew the conversation of how Sarah would get to the West Coast would come up, and it oughta be sooner rather than later. He was half afraid that she wanted to head out on her own, that she didn't need her dad anymore. Worried she would say she wanted to get a plane ticket, or take the Amtrak all the way to Corvallis. But he knows he needs to loosen his grip a little, so he braces himself when he turns to her.
"What'dya think, Sarah? You wanna be stuck in a car with your old man for a cross-country trip?"
Sarah rolls her eyes, but her face breaks into a grin. "Can we, Dad?"
This was too good to be true, he knew, but he wasn't gonna give up one last opportunity to spend some time with his girl till winter break.
"Course, baby," he tells her, and that flicker of anxiety quells just the tiniest bit.
The next few weeks fly by, and the knot of anxiety in Joel's chest feels like it's consuming him from the inside out. He's taken some time off, more than Sarah or Tommy can remember, but he's constantly trying to suggest ideas for activities to Sarah. For the most part, she's a good sport, understanding how much it means to her dad. She took pity on him, and let him drag her to places that ideally she would've gone to when she was little, but she humored him and he appreciated her dedication. He did his best to step back when she was heading out to spend time with friends--her time here was limited, after all, and she was always a social butterfly.
There are five weeks till classes start, four weeks, three, two, and in the blink of an eye, they're loading up the truck with all of Sarah's things, and Tommy is hugging Sarah goodbye, teary eyed. He gives Joel a hug, too. Joel would never admit it, but fuck he had really needed that hug.
They would take the scenic route. Make a memorable trip of it. Joel would make sure she settles in safe and sound, and then he'd head home.
6am Sunday.
You wake with a start. It's just over a week before term starts and your entire body aches. Fuck, you think to yourself, definitely overdid it with that last hike.
(The hiking part wasn't itself a problem, but one of the trails had washed out. You thought you'd found your way, but the "easy" three and a half mile hike took about five hours, leaving your calves bruised and your heels blistered.)
You roll over in your hotel room bed and, at the sound of a slight yelp followed by a gentle thud, realise with a sudden start that you just catapulted your cat off the corner.
"Shit, sorry goblin," you tell Spatula, who glares up at you with disdain as he licks at his paw. You reach down and, despite your inadvertent cat launch, he immediately rubs up against your fingertips and lets you scratch behind his ears.
"I'm sorry, baby," you soothe.
He meows, loudly. Howls, really. You take it as an apology accepted.
You sit up properly and look at your phone calendar. Nothing immediate. You don't need to get keys to your new apartment till tomorrow, nor do you meet your roommates till then–they're both moving in today, and moving is already horrible without having to navigate around the belongings of two other people. No, thanks. You can afford one more night at the hotel, and it'll make everything go that little bit more smoothly tomorrow. Besides, you have a bit of reading you'd like to get through, maybe stock up on non-perishables till you have a full-sized fridge, and get to know the city just a little.
You move gingerly, testing the ache in your muscles as you unfold yourself from the position you've been sat in and pull yourself from the bed. It hurts, but not something that won't be fixed with a little movement.
A plan forms. First, a walk, to try and loosen up your tight muscles. Then, errands. You have a whole list, with everything categorised by store, but then you enter IKEA and exit fifteen minutes later, only to find that five and a half hours have passed and it's evening now.
How was it that IKEA harnessed such a malicious power. How could anything harness that?
You need a fucking break. And a goddamn drink.
"Hey Dad," Sarah calls from the adjacent bedroom as Joel sweats, hauling another box towards her. The drive has been good, but it has been long. His legs ache. His back aches. There are parts of him that he didn't know existed that now ache.
"Yeah?" he calls back.
"Are you sure you're okay with me staying here tonight?"
Joel lets out a breath. He wants to be okay with it. And there's no way his nineteen year old would want to hang out with her dad when she could be spending the very first night in her brand new apartment. But he also wishes she wanted to spend one last night, hanging out in a hotel room with her dad. They could watch shitty movies together. Make the most of the final night before this cataclysmic shift.
But no.
That'd just be him being selfish. He can handle a night by himself. He's gotta handle a whole lotta them soon enough.
"O'course baby," he nods, hoping the smile he's plastered on his face looks totally genuine. "But we're still doin' breakfast in the morning, right?"
She nods, vigorous, and then waves her phone around. "I was looking up places! There's a diner called Tommy's," she laughs, "Wanna try that? 9:30?"
"Let's do it," he smiles, and this one is a little less forced.
"How much more do we have?" Sarah asks, nodding towards the box Joel's still holding.
"Last box," he grunts, "What else can I help with?"
He places the box down and lets out a slight, almost silent whimper. Sarah catches it, though.
"Maybe you should take it easy the rest of the day, Dad," she tells him, "We both know you have old man back."
He rolls his eyes but nods. "Guess you're right," he shrugs, "That my cue to take off?"
Sarah blushes but turns to him sheepishly. "Yeah, I-"
"No need to explain," Joel assures, "I know you must wanna get unpacked and settle in, get to know your roommates an' all."
She jumps up and, almost startling him, wraps her arms around him in a bear hug.
"Love you, dad," she grins, and she squeezes just a little tighter than usual.
He squeezes back, and they both pretend there aren't tears in his eyes.
As you step through the doors of the hotel bar, you decide you like it. The lighting is comfortably low. It's not loud, but it's not quiet, either. Colorful bottles line the shelves, the light of the filament bulbs glinting off the glass in rainbow prisms.
You take a seat at the bar and give a nod of thanks as the bartender passes you a small menu. It's unsurprisingly extortionate, hotel bar and all, but it'll do.
"Old fashioned, please," you tell the bartender, who nods in response. A minute later, he hands you a glass, delivered with a twist of orange and a cherry on top.
With your first sip, you feel your shoulders start to relax and some of the tension loosen from your body. The warmth of the burn envelops you and your stress starts to unravel, leaving only the buzz feeling good.
You order a second, and as the glass is handed to you, a voice to your right catches your attention.
"This seat taken?" a man asks.
You shake your head and offer a quick smile, gesturing towards it, "All yours."
"Much obliged," he nods, and slips into the backless stool next to yours.
The bartender comes over and passes him the same menu, but without looking at it he asks, "Could I get an old fashioned?"
You smile and catch his eye, tipping your glass towards him. "An excellent choice," you praise, "Though if you don't have a sweet tooth, I'd recommend asking Jeff there if he can go easy on the simple syrup."
"Oh yeah?" He asks, and then he leans in conspiratorially. "T'tell you the truth, I do have a bit of a sweet tooth."
You raise an eyebrow. "Is that so?"
Suddenly, he breaks into a grin and it's dazzling.
"Yeah," he laughs, "I've got cookies stashed in secret locations all through my house."
You raise an eyebrow. "If I keep 'em in my pantry, my brother'll find 'em and eat 'em all," he explains, "But ever since my kid was a girl scout, I always get cravings for girl scout cookies, so I buy an armful o'boxes and try and preserve 'em throughout the year, till I can replenish."
"What's your favorite girl scout cookie?"
"Caramel deLites, hands down."
"Oh yeah?"
"Absolutely," he nods.
The bartender, Jeff, sets the man's drink down with a clink. You catch one another's eye and both erupt into a fit of laughter.
You're not even sure what's funny. Maybe it's just been a long day? Maybe the whiskey was getting to you?
Whatever it is, it feels good.
The man takes a sip of his drink and lets out an aaaahh and it's goofy and charming and then he extends his hand.
"Joel," he tells you, "Joel Miller". You shake his hand, introduce yourself, and then take a sip of your own drink.
"So, tell me about yourself," you smile, "You coming from out of town?"
"Yes ma'am," he nods, "Come up here from Austin."
"Texas?"
Joel nods.
"That's a long trip."
"Yeah," he laughs, "It really is."
"So, you're a nice Southern boy, huh?"
"Well," he swishes his glass and tries to bite back a smile, "I don't know that I'd go quite so far, but my mama did raise me to be a gentleman."
"That so?" you ask and his blush deepens.
"I... have been known to get up to some trouble, but I like to think I've mellowed in my old age." He gestures at the beautiful little smatterings of silver at his temples, and you cackle.
"Okay, that's hot," you tell him and he chokes, but you keep going, "Old age, though? What are you, like, forty?"
He exhales, chagrined. "Forty-one."
You roll your eyes. "That ain't old."
"It feels it sometimes," he smiles, "My kid is grown. My little brother's married with a kid of his own on the way. My back hurts, pretty much all the time."
You snort. You also notice, without trying to look, that he doesn't have a wedding band. Doesn't have a tan line for one, either. Interesting.
"But more than that," he continues, "I guess I feel- I don't know. A little... aimless?"
"Yeah," you nod, and you let the moment sit. "I get that."
He lets out a little breath, and then turns back to you, focused.
"What about you? Where're you from?"
"Oof," you exhale, "All over. Spent a bit of time on the East coast. The Midwest. Lived a few months in the South, even," you tease as you bump your shoulder into his and he laughs. It's a surprisingly familiar gesture, but miraculously comfortable.
"Ever make it to Texas?"
"Naw," you shake your head, "My time in the South was all in Mississippi. After that I moved out to California, and I've been slowly working my way up the West Coast."
"And what have you been enjoying about the West Coast?" Joel asks.
"The mushrooms," you grin, and Joel frowns.
"Like, the kind you get in a little baggy from the dealer down the street, or-?"
"No," you laugh, "Or, well- Okay, sometimes. Gotta say it is great out here for that, too. But I mean fungus as a whole--mushrooms, mold, yeast, lichen. But I'm most interested in mushrooms. They're just really fuckin' cool, and there's so much we don't understand about them. And, they're delicious."
"Huh," Joel ponders, "T'tell you the truth, I've never thought much about mushrooms, besides enjoying 'em as a pizza topping."
"Most people don't," you agree, "But fuck, like-- Okay, so we know there are over five million types of fungi on Earth, but we've identified less than two percent of them. Some fungus aids decomposition. Some fungus is bioluminescent. Some are known worldwide for their delicious flavours, and others are known by the slow, horrible ways they kill you."
Joel raises his eyebrows, and suddenly you feel a little self conscious.
"Sorry, I do this," you laugh, rubbing at the back of your neck, "I get very excited about fungus and manage to alienate everyone around me."
You half expect him to stand up and walk away.
Instead, though, he leans in closer. "Don't apologise," he tells you, "I'm learning something new. Tell me more?"
"No, I should stop. Otherwise I'll never stop talking," you wince.
"How about just one more fungus fact?"
You sit for a minute, pondering. "This is- well, I guess this is one of the reasons I find fungus so fascinating. So, fungus can't photosynthesise the way that plants do--they can't produce their own food from sunshine, and water, and carbon dioxide. Instead, their mycelium-- they're these thread-like networks--they branch out beneath the earth, seeking out food, growing in the direction where it can find the nutrients it needs and breaking down organic material all around them, sometimes living organisms, as a parasite, and sometimes dead organisms as a decomposer, or both. And it's just- It's this hidden world, that exists right beneath the surface even in some of the extreme places on earth, temperature-wise. And most days, we don't even think about it."
You punctuate your thought with a large swallow of your drink, which is half-watered down now that the ice is melted, and doesn't hit quite as hard as you'd hoped, but then you look up at Joel and he's smiling at you, pensive, and--
"That's- That's actually really interesting."
Before you can respond, though, Joel glances at his watch and balks. It is getting late. "Shit," he shakes his head, "I think I oughta call it a night," he says, pulling back. "Early morning tomorrow, and if I stay at the bar I'll just keep drinkin'."
Fuck. That's a dismissal. Of course you went on too much about mushrooms. You'd fucked this up. You'd thought this was going well, but now it felt like a bucket of cold water was dumped over you. "Oh," you nod, matching his posture, and try to swallow down the sudden wave of disappointment. "Of course. Have a good night, Joel."
Joel stands up and then looks you up and down, considering. It's not brazen, but it isn't shy, either. And then understanding flashes across his face.
"Wait- Sorry, that's not how I meant it." He reaches out towards you and you melt into his touch. "I'm messin' this up." He chuckles, but it sounds pained. "Now look, I don't wanna make any presumptions. And I'm really hopin' I'm not coming off as some--dirty old man. Jesus, I haven't done this in a while. But I'm in room 308."
Your eyebrows shoot up. What you'd taken for disinterest was just--nerves?
"I reckon I'll be awake for a while yet. You're welcome to... drop by."
The disappointment melts, making way for a fluttering in your stomach.
"Twenty minutes," you assure him, "308?"
He nods and he brakes into a sheepish grin, shedding what you now realise had been something of an anxious wince. "308."
You watch him leave. When he's out of sight, you toss back the rest of your watery drink and go to pay your tab, but Jeff tells you it was already settled. You thank him and tuck your shaking hands in your pockets. You feel an electricity running through you as you take the elevator up.
When you get back to your room, you hop into the shower, just to freshen up--you keep your hair dry but scrub your body. Once you're clean, you brush your teeth.
Stepping back out of the en suite, you survey the hotel room. Spatula is lounging on the corner of the bed, entirely uninterested in your movements. You top up his dry food bowl and place a kiss between his ears before slipping out.
When you knock at Joel's door, you hear a slight rustle and clatter and then the door swings open, Joel's staring a little wide-eyed, like he didn't actually expect you to show. He's wearing grey sweats and a Johnny Cash t-shirt that looks like it's been around nearly as long as you have. He shifts his weight from foot to foot, an anxious tell that's desperately endearing.
"C'mon in," he smiles, and you step in, closing the door behind you.
You reach out to cup his face, delighting in the feeling of coarse stubble beneath your fingertips. Your first kiss is chaste. You both lean forward and press your lips to one another gently, exploring.
Then, you let out a little moan and Joel shudders. Heat surges between you, and his hands are cradling your head and brushing your cheek and he's pinning you against the closed door. You're kissing again, nothing chaste remaining, learning the taste of him, his rhythm, the crashing waves of give and take between you.
You wrap one leg around him and smirk when he lets out a throaty groan as you grind against his hard cock. You're pretty sure he's not wearing underwear, the thick bulge seemingly unconstrained in his grey sweats, the whole length pressing against your thigh.
Your head falls back and you let out soft, breathy noises as his lips trace along your collarbone, up your throat, and against that tender little spot behind your ear. When he puts your earlobe between his lips and presses his teeth gently against the skin, your knees go weak and he chuckles, strong arms wrapping around you, holding you up.
"Bed?" he asks, and you breathe yes and then, with a yelp and a throaty chuckle, you're lifted up and spun around and both tumbling into the duvet.
You're grasping at each other, desperate to keep your hands on one another. The only times you part is when you undress, and even then, you're helping each other--pulling the hem of his shirt over his lifted arms, pressing into him as he reaches around and moves to unhook your bra, but then he realises you're not wearing one and lets out a groan, his thumbs brushing alongside the tender skin along your ribs, moving gently as if to cup your breasts, but then he pulls back.
Normally you might wait, do this part slowly, draw out the tease just a little bit longer.
Tonight, though, you're ravenous.
As you fiddle with the buttons of your pants, you tug at the drawstring keeping Joel's sweats on his hips. The bow comes loose in one smooth motion, and he lifts his hips and you pull the sweats down.
Your mouth immediately waters seeing him bare, laid out for you. You watch a bead of precum drip down the head and pool on his belly. The coarse hair of his happy trail glistens with it. He's thick, uncut, and looks painfully hard, his cock head ruddy. "Fuck, you're beautiful," you tell him, and his cheeks redden but he grins. It's boyish, the way he grins, and devastatingly charming.
And, what you're saying is true. His body is gorgeous, something you wish you could sketch. Soft flesh over hard muscle, visible tan lines where his chest and shoulders are noticeably lighter than his arms. The muscles and veins along his throat are driving you absolutely fucking insane as he swallows and looks up at you.
He's got freckles on his shoulders, too, and without thinking, you lower yourself down to kiss at his shoulder. He shakes, just a little, and lets out the most beautiful gasp. It's addictive, pulling these noises from him. You follow the curve of him, giving him a taste of his own medicine--tracing feather-light kisses along his collarbone, up the tendons of his neck, behind his ear. You can feel the blood pulse in his veins as your lips brush along him. Joel goes from panting lightly to full on groaning, rutting his hips up towards you and, frustrated, meeting only air.
"Can I taste you?", you ask, and Joel lets out a half-strangled sound and nods, vigorous.
You scoot back, lower yourself, poke out your tongue and, without any preamble, lick at the slit of his head, tasting the salty, tangy precum.
Joel tips his head back and groans and you decide to be kind. You grasp onto his hips and take him in your mouth, slowly sinking down, inch by inch by inch and now you can feel him at the back of your throat, your saliva dripping down the shaft and collecting in the hair between his thighs.
You bob your head up and down, taking him deeper with each thrust, but your throat is full and there are still inches to go. You relax, doing everything you can to take him deeper, and he starts to thrust up gently.
You let him fuck into your mouth but release one of his hips, allowing him to move as freely as he needs and freeing up your hand, which you shove into your underwear, rubbing furiously at your clit.
It doesn't take much to lose yourself in it, to focus only on the sensation. You're so wet, slick coating your fingers, making the glide that much smoother as you touch yourself. Joel tastes so good, too, the intrusion of his cock the most delicious thing, feeling the way he shudders when you moan, the way he moans when you shudder.
"Fuck-" Joel gasps, and then there's a hand guiding you gently off of him.
You raise an eyebrow. "You okay?"
He swallows, hard, and nods. "More than okay. Felt too fuckin' good."
"Oh yeah?" and you lean down, as if to take him back in your mouth, but he chuckles and pulls you back again.
"It's been... a while. For me. And-" He drags his palm down his face, wearing an almost pained expression. "Christ, you just look too fuckin' good down there, mouth stretched 'round me while you touch yourself. An' it feels too fuckin' good, too. I ain't ready for this to be over yet but if you keep lettin' me fuck your throat like that it's gonna be over real quick. And I wanna feel that pretty pussy myself."
You sit back up and he pulls you towards him so you're straddling him.
"You gonna fuck me, Joel?"
"Yes," he breathes, "Yes, baby, please-"
You do an awkward wobble and then stand up, shedding your pants and letting your panties drop, stepping out of them, one foot and then the other, and the way he's watching you is addictive. He watches you with beautiful eyes, drinking all of you in, and suddenly the moment has changed into one of those quiet, intimate moments where you both exhale a laugh.
You straddle him again, and lean down to kiss him, and the electric current surges up. He grabs you by the jaw, meeting your desperation. His lips on yours are exactly the balm you need and you can taste the whiskey on his breath.
"Feels fucking good," you tell Joel as you slide up and down his length. He's not penetrating you, not yet, but the lips of your pussy are spread and you're gliding along him, feeling his head at your clit and thrusting back till you're nearly seated on his balls.
He watches you, nearly unblinking, drinking it all in. Then, he lets out a groan, and half-sits up, suddenly focused.
"Shit," he closes his eyes in frustration, "I don't have any condoms. Shit shit shit-"
You push him back down and kiss him again. Then, you hop off the bed and sift around in your jean pockets.
"Ah-ha!," you exclaim, once you've found your treasure. Joel raises and eyebrow and you wink. "Saw they were selling them in the lobby. Figured it might be a good idea."
"Shit," Joel laughs, and presses his lips just to the side of your mouth. "Clever girl," he tells you, and a shiver goes up your spine.
He leans to help, but you shoo him away and he watches, entranced, as you neatly open the condom wrapper and, with a small amount of difficulty, roll it down his cock.
"Feeling okay?" You ask him, "Shit, I shoulda gotten the Magnums. Is your dick okay? It's not being choked to death by an inappropriately sized rubber, is it?"
Joel snorts. "We'll manage," he says, and then he grips you by the hips, lines himself up. He draws his knuckles along your cunt and groans, "Fuck, so goddamn wet for me-" and, the moment you look at him and nod, he holds the head of his cock against your drooling lips and presses into you.
It's a big stretch as he lowers you down onto him, the intrusion almost painful, but before you can even take a breath, it melts into absolute pleasure. You've fucked people with longer cocks before, and you've fucked people with girthier cocks before, but never have you fucked someone with a cock that's both this long and thick and it feels like you're being split in two and it's perfect and you realise, with a sudden flip of your stomach, he isn't even fully seated inside you yet.
Then, you manage to focus on the words Joel is saying-that had really just been background noise for the past ten seconds or so-and suddenly you're tuning back in for "Tha's it," his voice low and hoarse, surprisingly gentle, "Good girl, takin' this cock so well, look at you."
His brow is furrowed and he's looking at you with such dark eyes, nearly black, the pupils are so blown. "Just a little more, that's it, just one more inch, you can do it, christ, look at you, takin' all of me."
His tone is reverent and it sets a fire through you. You can feel more slickness build and drip out of you, and from the way he moans, you're certain he can feel it too despite the condom.
"So fuckin' wet," he groans, "Soakin' my cock- grippin' me so nice-Fuck--"
He leans towards you and cradles your head in his hand, kissing you hard.
When you both pull back, you know your lips must be kiss swollen and red. His are--they're soft and bright, and you want to eat him whole.
"You're gonna be the death of me, woman."
He's thrusting into you lazily, holding you in place, but you need more, you need all of him.
You push forward and move his hand from your waist to your clit. As you manoeuvre him, his nostrils flare, and you'd wonder if he was angry, if not for the way you felt his cock stiffen even further inside of you. You start to move your hips, to rub up against the thumb on your clit, and to feel every fucking inch of him.
Urged on by the way he groans, you start to ride him, properly. Holding each other close, you fuck down onto him and he leans back, awed.
"Enjoying the show?" you ask.
"Damn- right- I- am-," Joel breathes, every word punctuated with a shuddering breath after you drive back down onto his cock, "Jesus- you- look- so- good- like- that."
You like being watched. Being admired. It sent an extra thrill through you, and your hips stutter, just a little, and now you're following a new, faster rhythm.
"Fuck, that's it, baby-" he praises, "Shit, yes- bounce on it."
You lean forward and kiss his throat, and then he makes this noise, half-strangled and beautiful.
"Shit, honey-- honey, honey, hold on-," he holds you still and you're glad he has, because your brain hadn't quite processed his words.
He's looking at you so earnestly.
"Baby, if you keep ridin' me like this I am gonna blow my load in the next twenty seconds and I don't wanna end this quite so soon."
You hum, a moment of consideration. You stare into his eyes, and part of it is calculated seduction, but another part is getting genuinely lost in the way he looks at you. The crinkles round his eyes. The way he seems able to focus on you, in a way that feels as frightening as it is exhilarating.
"How about this," You smile, "You get yours, and then you can eat me out till I get mine. And if you're ready to go again by the time I've come, we can see where we're at then. Hmm?"
You see a bead of sweat trickle down his temple, and take a moment to appreciate how much he's clearly trying to control himself.
After a moments of avoiding your eye, he looks at you again and he looks utterly wrecked. "You- talkin' like that?" He shakes his head and tries to even his breath. "Fuck, I nearly came right there."
"It's okay," you soothe, and you cup his jaw and resume you movements, riding him like you had before. "You can come if you need to-" your fingertips stroke the stubble of his chin, "You're close, huh? It's okay, daddy, you can let go."
Joel lets out a strangled noise and busts immediately.
You savor the way it feels, the pulse of his cock as he spills into you. No, into the condom, you correct yourself, but you can always pretend-
After his balls relax and you can feel him start to get soft, you hold the condom down as you pull yourself off, and you're nearly unseated when there's a sudden squelch noise that sends you both into tumbles of laughter.
It takes a while to calm down, and you find yourselves heaving, tangled in the sheets, and wrapped up in each other. The condom is hanging limply on Joel's now-soft cock and it's oddly cold and gooey as you accidentally roll against it, and that sends you both off again.
"Fuck," Joel snorts, and tugs at the condom, starting to roll it off his length, "I'd almost forgotten the weird texture of a used condom. Fuckin'... Slug-like."
"That-" you declare, "Is visceral. And I hate it. Thanks."
He snorts, and you suddenly have a question.
"Condoms not making too many appearances in your life?"
"Not many, no."
"What, you usually fuck raw?"
"Just haven't been sleepin' with anyone," he shrugs, nonplussed.
"Well, I gotta say, the good people of Austin have been missing out."
Joel shrugs again, and it comes off as casual, but you notice the way his ears tint pink. "Just- not been something I did. But now, I guess, I can. And with way less guilt."
"Why guilt? Are-" you venture, dread pooling in your stomach, "Are you married?"
His eyes flit up to you sharply, and then soften immediately. He lets out a breath and shakes his head. "No. Nothin' like that. I was married, but I've been divorced nearly twenty years now."
The tightness immediately uncoils and you realise how tense you were only a moment ago. I am not a cog in the machine of a collapsing marriage. Thank fuck.
But now your curiosity is piqued. "So... why the guilt?"
"Sorry, I- I really didn't mean to get into it. I'd rather not get into it. It's- complicated."
"Of course," you shrug, and it isn't a problem because this is just a hot fantasy hookup that you'll remember fondly, and it'll be wonderful masturbation fuel for probably the rest of your life, but you don't wanna make the poor guy go into his life's trauma, especially when he's looking at you so fucking earnestly and you are actually really fucking fascinated but no, you would not let this become a problem.
"Thanks," he says, and then steps out of the room. You hear the clang of the bin as he steps on the pedal, then drops the condom, takes a piss and washes his hands.
"You hungry?" He asks, and you realize very suddenly, you're absolutely famished.
"Yes," you jump up and he laughs when you run, bare-assed and shameless, over to the corner of the room filled with brochures and traveller info and finally, you raise it in triumph when you find it, the list of nearby takeaways.
"Okay," you look at the list, "There's one place at the top of the list here that's apparently highly rated, but I actually have plans there soon and I wanna wait till then to eat there. Hope that's okay."
Joel comes over to you and rests his head on your shoulder. "No problem."
"But... alright," you continue. "There's pizza. Or... more pizza. Or, look--there's a Southern-style place, that'll make you feel right at home!" Joel pokes you in the side and you swat at him as he grunts a laugh.
Suddenly, a warning sound starts playing on loop in your brain. It was dreadfully domestic, wasn't it? This was an absolute stranger you'd just met in a hotel bar? But... it also felt... nice? And it felt nice in ways that you'd never found yourself enjoying before. Even with long-term partners. Maybe because this was so low-stakes, you reasoned, such an inevitably temporary situation, so you weren't putting the same kind of pressure on yourself.
As soon as you think that, the eternal curse of overthinking shows itself and you suddenly feel desperately self conscious. Before you can pull away and make some excuse, though, Joel's arm wraps around you and his thumb starts rubbing little circles into a tender bit of skin between your hip and your tummy. The anxiety spiral you'd been teetering on the edge of suddenly vanishes.
"How about-," he nods at the list, "Pizza?"
After Joel calls in your order, the pizza delivery service tells you to expect your food in about thirty minutes. You remember you have a little box of edibles. You ask Joel if he minds if you take one, and he doesn't. You offer him one, and he automatically declines, but then as he starts to explain, he pauses and pivots, goes "Wait, actually. Yeah. Why not?"
A freckled kid who looks no more than sixteen pulls up with a short stack of pizza boxes and a two liter bottle of root beer. He raps awkwardly on the door after exactly thirty five minutes, and it swings open.
The room looks utterly wrecked, clothing strewn along every surface. Joel answers the door wearing a robe, his entire face smelling of sex, and his moustache still shining with the slick of your release.
"Thanks, kid," Joel nods, and hands him a small wad of cash. The kid eyes him and shrugs. "Keep the change," he tells him, and the door swings back shut.
The edibles have hit beautifully. You're both blissed out, comfortably hazy, lost in the sensation of bare limbs on bedsheets and the flavors of the pizza and it's assorted sauces. You lay together on the bed, paper plates strewn between you. In the background, an X-Files rerun plays.
"Ooh!" You sit up as you catch the premise of the episode, "I love this one! See the goo? There's a giant fungal... entity.. that's working on digesting them, and giving them hallucinations as they die."
"You and mushrooms, huh?" Joel laughs, but then looks back at the episode and contemplates the viscous yellow goo. "Jesus christ," he frowns, and sniffs, now contemplating the mushrooms on his pizza slice.
You spot his glare and snort. "I think you're safe."
He takes another bite and shakes his head as if to clear it.
"I'm getting tired," he admits.
"Me too," you agree.
"No pressure, but in case it wasn't clear, you're welcome to stay the night here."
"That's sweet," you tell him, and think it over. "If I took you up on that, would you be offended if I slip out early?"
Joel raises a brow.
"I have a cat," you explain, "And I'm working on moving into a new place, and meeting a friend for breakfast, and then I need to check out after breakfast because I won't be able to get my keys for the new place until the breakfast but I can't take my cat to a diner-"
You take a breath.
"Basically, I've got a bunch of things I need to do in the morning, but if you don't mind me slipping out around, maybe, 5-ish, then I'd love to stay."
He stares at you.
You regret saying as much as you said. You don't need to over-explain yourself to this actual stranger. He doesn't care. There's no reason for him to care. He's probably in it just for the fuck, and it was fun and if you stay then there's a chance the two of you will wake up at some point in the night, still horny and lustful and you might fuck again and you'd be lying if you said that wasn't part of the draw. You realise, though, you'd also be lying if you said you didn't care what he thought of you. All of a sudden, you are overwhelmed with caring what this man thinks of you.
How fucking inconvenient.
"I wouldn't be offended at all," Joel chews, swallows, wipes the corner of his mouth with a napkin and speaks again. "What's your cat's name?"
You don't know what you'd expected he'd say, but it wasn't that. You buffer for a moment. "It's- Spatula."
"Spatula?"
"Yep." You feel foolish.
"Huh. Spatula."
A silent moment between you.
"Got any pictures?"
You weren't expecting that, either. "I... do? Do you want to see them?" He nods. You pull out your phone to scroll through.
Joel, suddenly scrambled around for his phone, too. It was late and he hadn't checked it for hours. Had it been on silent? What if Sarah had called and he'd missed it?
His panic eased when he saw he had only two notifications. Both from Sarah, but neither were bad. He hadn't been neglecting any crises. The first text was a selfie of Sarah and an unfamiliar person, which she'd texted to him with the caption New roomie!! The second contained an address to the place they'd have breakfast tomorrow along with Just wanted you to know I've invited a friend to join us tomorrow morning! Is that okay? Realized I should maybe have checked with you? 😬
There was an ache in his chest. He wanted to keep her to himself, get to spend one last day, just the two of them. It was the start of a whole new chapter, but more than anything, he wished he could hold onto the moment for just a second longer.
But Sarah was stressed, he knew this, so he wasn't gonna make it worse and put this burden on her. He could handle it. He had to handle it. He typed back- No problem, baby. Can't wait to meet your friend.
After a moment, he followed up with another text. Gonna turn in now. Good nite!
The less he texted right now, the better. He did not want Sarah to know anything about the night he was having.
His screen lit up a moment later. Night Dad! He takes a deep breath and wills some of the tension away.
He slips his phone aside and you scoot into bed next to him.
"This," you announce, "Is Spatula."
Joel scrolls thru, his brows raising higher with each image.
With a single nod, he opens his mouth and instead of speaking, he collapses into laughter. It comes out a wheeze- "I-- I know this won't make any sense, but your cat looks just like my goddamn brother."
You're laughing now too, both of you almost hysterical, even though you have no frame of reference. You cherish the absurdity.
Then, Joel pulls up a picture on his phone and shows you, and now you're doubling over again because his brother looks exactly like Spatula.
You don't remember falling asleep. You curse your body's internal clock because you wake up right at 5am, and even though you know you should get up and leave, you wish you could have just a little bit longer.
It's such a comfortable way to wake up. One arm is folded under your pillow, and the other is slung over Joel's hip. He's asleep, snoring softly, and strands of his hair are mussed along his forehead. Your hand is holding his tummy, but you realise there's something pressing against the heel of your hand, and then realise, with a delicious jolt, that he's hard and straining against his boxers.
It's so fucking hard to get out of that bed, but with enough barely-effective reminders--you're gonna fuck up your whole day if you're late, gotta make a good impression, Spatula's gonna be so disappointed if you're late with his breakfast--you manage to bully yourself out of the warm and wonderful bed containing blankets and absolutely fantastic dick, and you tiptoe through the room, dress quickly, and, after making a note and leaving it on his bedside stand, you slip out.
Joel wakes up with a jolt, and then rolls over to see that the alarm clock (which he dared not contemplate the number of times he must have snoozed) was telling him it was 9:13.
He was late. Really fucking late. And then the panic made his brain spin faster and that's when he noticed the note on his bedside table.
I had a really good time If you're in town for a little longer, don't be a stranger?
It's followed with your name and phone number, and a rather detailed mushroom sketch across the page. He wasn't sure what kind of mushroom it was, but it was beautiful, and clearly hand-drawn, and for whatever reason you'd decided to tear it out of, presumably, your sketchbook? And you gave it to him, and he's gonna read that note and replay last night for the rest of his fucking life. It felt incredibly precious. He placed it in a book so it wouldn't get creased or folded. Made sure it was all contained and neat, totally flat in between the pages.
Then, he dragged himself out of bed and into the shower.
After scrubbing the smell of sex off of his entire body, he dresses quickly and checks his watch again. 9:28.
He texts Sarah and lets her know he's a few minutes behind. She responds with an eye roll emoji.
Joel settles in his truck and pulls up directions. It's only a few minutes away. He won't be too late.
When Joel steps into the diner, he's charmed by it. It's old school, with a checkerboard floor and bright red vinyl seats. He scans the room till he spots Sarah in a booth in the corner. She's laughing over a hot chocolate, and her friend must be in the seat opposite her.
He catches Sarah's eye and she grins at him, waving him over.
You've been at the diner about fifteen minutes, and you and Sarah are already getting along beautifully.
You'd met on a university message board and had become fast friends, but meeting someone in person was always a little terrifying. On top of that, you'd already committed to spending at least one (academic) year with this person, so you were damn sure gonna make it work.
Sarah waves over her dad. You can't see him yet, the back of the booth too high.
But then he's standing right there.
You already have a hand outstretched, but when he sees you and you see him, your stomach flips and dread runs through you. All the color drains from his face. He looks like a deer in headlights, and you'd be surprised if you didn't look the same.
Sarah looks between you, not quite concerned, but definitely confused. Sarah smiles and tries to diffuse the situation.
"Hi dad!" She grins, "This is my new roommate! Well, the other new roommate--the one in the picture, their name is Ellie, they weren't able to make it this morning. BUT. Breakfast seemed like a great time to hand off keys!"
Joel is still frozen and white-faced. Your brain whirs, and you know you've just fucking catapulted yourself into a disastrous mess, but you do your very best to save face.
Reaching your hand out further so he can't possibly miss it, he gives into some familiar social instinct, takes it and you shake. You think of his hands, how they dragged along your body last night, touched you, felt you, wrecked you.
You introduce yourself. He nods, avoiding eye contact.
"Joel." He grunts. "Miller."
Sarah frowns at him, but turns back to the menu.
This- was unexpected. Problematic. Arguably, really fucked up. All of those things and more. But it'll be fine.
All throughout breakfast, you repeat that to yourself, letting the words bounce around your head. It will be fine, you repeat your mantra, it will be fine, and you try not to feel too hurt at the way Joel's avoiding eye contact as if simply looking at you will cause him unimaginable disgust.
Everything will be fine.
Note: The fic's premise is loosely based on the book Mistakes Were Made which is a fucking excellent sapphic romance novel that utilises this trope. Would strongly recommend the book if you're into smutty queer stories.
#joel miller smut#tlou#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#tlou fic#joel miller x f!reader#ok i gotta be honest i was stoned out of my mind for writing most of this#but mostly sober for editing#thank u for bearing with meeeeeee
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Hey, Hey, It's Your Birthday! ~ Miguel O'Hara x Fem! Reader (18+)
Word Count: 3.8k
Content: You go to the fair with Miguel. Brief mention of vomiting. Miguel hates those rides to death. Fried butter (yeah, it's a content warning). Face sitting. Oral sex, fem! receiving. Vaginal sex.
A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY WIFE AND GR! MIGUEL CREATOR @bluesidez! It's officially your birthday for me now, but you deserve everything you want in life and more. So take this little something something I made for you.
GymRat! Miguel who's very excited about your birthday.
He’s planned for it ever since you two were together: what to do, where to go, and what he would do to you. However, that last part was for later.
He didn’t give you many details of what he was planning, either. He only told you to wear something comfortable but still cute due to the cooler weather. He didn’t leave you any room to ask questions, either.
GymRat! Miguel who picked you up early.
The place you two were going to was open all day, but he thought it was best to go early. When he greeted you at the dorm, he was blown away. Your outfit, albeit comfortable with the black cargo pants and matching long-sleeve shirt, was cute.
“You look gorgeous.” Miguel said with a kiss, careful not to mess up your make-up.
“Thank you. So do you.”
He looked down at his denim jacket and sweatshirt, grinning at your compliment.
“Anything for my baby.”
GymRat! Miguel who still doesn’t tell you where you’re going. He did say the drive was far, about forty-five minutes away and to get comfortable. You pull up a fall playlist and connect your phone to the aux cord. There, you two make those minutes fly by, jamming out in the car.
GymRat! Miguel who gave himself a mental pat on the back at your gasp when pulling up into the parking lot.
It’s a fall fair that’s supposed to be there for a few weeks before moving on to the next state. You had mentioned going to one would be fun. You couldn’t think of the last time you been to one. Miguel thought taking you to the fair would be an impressionable birthday gift with many things to do.
The rides, the food, the games. Everything there to make it the best birthday ever. At least, he hoped so.
“What do you think-”
“I love it!” You hug his neck and pepper his face with your kisses.
GymRat! Miguel who decided to start with the rides first. Work up a good appetite and not worry about you two throwing up later.
There were a myriad of options to choose from. Rides that spin you high in the air, shake you back and forth, or spin you while you're sitting down.
“What do you want to start with?”
You hum, taking a look at your options.
“I saw one where you have to grab on handlebars while the ride spins very high.”
“You gonna be okay with that?” Miguel watched the ride in question, seeing the ride go high up in the air as people held on tight.
You merely nod, taking his hand to stand in line.
As you two got closer and closer, Miguel kept asking if you were sure you wanted to do it and how there were many other rides the two of you could go on.
“Are you sure you don't wanna go on this ride?”
“Huh? What? I'm fine.”
“Mmhm.” Your cute grin isn't lost on him, “It's okay. I'll hold your hand the entire time.”
“I said I was fine.”
GymRat! Miguel who was not fine.
His heartbeat could be heard in his ears, and sweat clung to his neck. His legs almost shook when he stepped on the ride, and you were blissfully unaware. Children halfway below his age were more ecstatic than him, gripping onto the two bars and grinning with glee.
You matched the energy of the children as you shimmied, chain in front of you for security.
“You ready?”
“Uh-huh.” Miguel gulped and you leaned over.
“Hey, we really don't have to do this if-”
“I'm fine, I'm fine.” He gives you a smooch as if to reassure you. But it was also for himself.
GymRat! Miguel who had his eyes shut the entire time.
Surrounded by screams, a mix of enjoyment and fear while the ride spun around and around. Miguel had a death grip on the bars when the ride slanted, angled in a way where he felt higher than before. He tried to take a risk by popping one eye open, but at the wrong time, the ride made them so high up that he could see the cars in the parking lot.
At least he heard you enjoy yourself, your screams matching the pitch of the kids.
“That was so much fun!” You hold on to his arm, giggling and laughing. Miguel was holding on to you too, a little dizzy, stomach twisting. Didn't help that someone quickly ran out of the ride to vomit in the nearest trash can.
“I'm glad you had fun…”
“Baby, are you okay?”
“Mhm. What's next?”
“I can get you some water or something.” You start looking around, but he stopped you.
“I'm ok. Really.”
He was going to kick Gabriel's ass the next time he saw him. Giving him so much trauma to the point rides make him uneasy. But that wasn't going to ruin your day.
“Okay. I saw this one ride that drops you. Come on.”
Miguel’s stomach churned at that as you’re pulling him along. It still does it when you two are strapped in next to another couple. He's watched six other people before him release blood-curdling screams once the ride drops them, and he wasn’t looking forward to that.
“Can you hold my hand?”
You instantly take it, seeing his uneasy face. “I got you.”
GymRat! Miguel who hated that ride the most.
As the two of you went higher and higher, the grip on your hand got stronger. His heart picked up in speed, and sweat reached his palms. You gasped at how high up you were, seeing the entire fair in your line of sight. Miguel admires your incredulous face, the uneasiness going away at how much of a good time you were having.
Then came the drop.
You and Miguel let out the same shriek when the chairs dropped down. The drop hit his stomach and made him queasy. And it only lasted two seconds.
“Fuck that…” The guy from the couple next to you two let out.
Miguel wanted to fist-bump him in solidarity.
You were just fit as a fiddle, with no hints of being sick or anything worse.
“So fun!”
“Very fun!” Miguel then groaned, holding his stomach.
“Ok, let's get you something to drink.”
You got two glasses of water, and he gulped it down like he hadn't had a drink in years. Good enough to make him feel better. Although he wasn't sure if he could take going on another death ride.
“You know, I saw think I saw a ride that's perfect for you.”
When you took his hand, you led him to a car line, similar to a zip line that takes you all across the fair from above. It was not extreme or intense, which would make him sick, but a nice, gentle ride.
GymRat! Miguel who was grateful for your generosity.
He can do heights if he isn’t hurled at unpredictable speeds.
The car line was peaceful. It was slow, taking the two of you through the entire fair. He could see those death traps, making more fairgoers its victim. The rows of games that you pointed out were the ones you wanted to go to later. The scent of fried food hit his nostrils, an endless amount of options to pick from.
“See? This isn’t so bad right?”
“It’s not.” He kissed your hand, and you smiled at the affection.
When getting off of the ride, your stomach growled in unison—time to eat.
The lingering scent of fried food and freshly popped popcorn radiated all over the fair. You two ordered from a few stands before carrying the food to a wooden bench. Miguel sprawled out his arms as if it were a gourmet meal.
“Bon appetit.” He kissed his fingers for emphasis.
It was standard fair food. A hot dog and fries topped off with an orange slushie. But there was a main thing Miguel wanted you to try.
“Ever had these?” He presents to you fried oreos, displayed on a tray with a dash of powdered sugar.
“No. How good are they?”
“Better than fried butter.”
You scrunched your face, “Ew, you had that?”
“Blame my brother.”
Miguel handed you a cookie, dusting some of the sugar off so it wouldn’t stain your clothes. He leans forward while watching you take a bite, a glint in your eyes.
“Oh my god.”
“Is that a good ‘oh my god’ or?”
“Gimme some more.”
He handed you another one, and you hummed at the crispy yet fluffy texture. “Why haven’t I had these before?”
“I don’t know, but that’s what boyfriends are for.”
You managed to get powdered sugar on your shirt, which Miguel quickly wiped off. He also made a mental note to tell the group chat that the fried oreos were a win.
GymRat! Miguel who declares the rest of the rides off limits since you two ate.
You weren’t mad at all once you saw the endless number of games on display. There were so many options to pick from, from knocking off bowling pins to aiming three darts at balloons to win a prize. This was your day, so Miguel wanted you to pick the ones that caught your eye.
One game involved you two blowing enough water in a hole to fill a clown head. You stretched your arms in preparation while Miguel rolled his neck.
“Winner gets this little guy!” The booth owner showed you two a small, orange rubber duck.
“That’s you.”
Miguel playfully rolled his eyes, “You just called me cute.”
The timer counted down. 3…2…1!
Miguel was hyper-focused in trying to get the water into the hole. His eyes darted back and forth between his clown head filling up and then yours. You’re obviously a pro, as your head managed to have more water than his. That wouldn’t stop him, his thumbs pressing the buttons harder, under the impression that more water would shoot out.
But he had to admit defeat as the bell rang at your victory.
“Yes! In your face!” You jumped up in your chair and did a little victory dance. Miguel couldn’t be upset since your dance was adorable.
The rubber duck was presented to you, and you showed it to him with glee.
“You got a name for it?”
“Hmm, I like Miggy.”
The two of you laugh at the honking noise the prize makes when you squeeze it.
The next game consisted of dart throwing. Miguel saw this giant, blue teddy bear, making his mission to give to you. He wasn’t bad at playing darts, but now, with his girlfriend watching his every move, he was going to be great at them. The objective was to pop the same colored balloons to get the prize. He had to pop three white ones to get you the bear.
“You got this.” You cheered him on and kiss him on the cheek, before giving him some room.
GymRat! Miguel who lined up the first shot perfectly, hitting the white balloon with ease.
Your cheer made his chest swell before moving on to the next one. The balloon was slightly higher, but it wasn’t an issue. He stretched his arms when the second balloon popped. Almost ready to win his girlfriend the prize.
The third time he throws the dart, the wind blew and it curved to the blue balloon, popping it.
Miguel threw his arms up, “Are you serious? Did you see that?”
“I saw it.” The guy who ran the booth said, “No prize for you.”
“Let me try again.” Miguel started digging into his pockets and you stop him.
“Hey, it's okay. I don't need it.”
“You don't, but today is your special day and I'm getting you that bear.” He pulled out more tickets for the owner. Three more darts are placed in front of him and you continue to cheer him on.
Everything was the same. He managed to hit two balloons, but not the third one.
“This game is rigged.”
“Or maybe, you suck.” The guy teased.
Miguel tsked, pulling out more tickets. “One more time.”
“You know, I think I saw the same bear at the game with the goldfish.” You whispered but he shook his head.
“No, I saw the bear here and I'm gonna get it for you here.”
“Okay, babe.” You accepted defeat, walking back with your hands up.
Once again, three darts were placed before him, and he took a deep breath. Miguel took his time, not caring if a line was forming behind him. He was going to win this for you. The first dart hit its target, then the second one. On the third, he paused, waiting for any amount of wind or subtle distraction to keep him from winning that bear. With confidence in his chest, the dart landed, popping the final white balloon.
Miguel hugged you tight while you cheered for him. A couple of passersby applauded him for his achievement.
The booth owner frowned, handing him the stuffed bear. “Congrats.”
Miguel presented the bear to you with a giant smile. Seeing it overshadow you when you tried to hold it, he decided to hold on to it for you.
“I should get you something.” You ponder among all the booths you haven't gone to yet.
“It's your birthday, not mine.”
“For my birthday, I want to win something for you.”
Miguel wasn’t going to push back and let you decide where to go.
There was a booth that included a ring toss. And a cute stuffed bunny with a bow that practically had Miguel’s name on it.
The game was simple: toss the rings on the bottles. If you managed to get five, you won the stuffed animal. Easy peasy.
“Let me know if it's hard.” Miguel said, “I can always do it.”
“It's okay, I got it.”
He didn't doubt you at all. Not when you managed to toss five rings with ease. Able to carry the medium-sized prize in your arms. Miguel was so glad to have someone like you.
Before returning to the car, Miguel circled to the food area to grab another batch of fried oreos. The two of you munching in the car as he drove back.
“Did you have a good time?”
You nod, licking the powdered sugar from your fingers. “I did! Thanks for taking me.”
At a stop light, Miguel gave you a peck on the lips.
“The day isn't over yet. Are you okay with staying at my place? Peter won't be there until tomorrow morning. So it's just us.”
“Of course, I'm okay with that.”
GymRat! Miguel who contained his excitement when pulling out a couple of gift bags.
After returning from the fair, you two showered, put on something comfortable, and turned on a vlog about restaurants making bread. Your eyes lit up at the bags in front of you.
“Oh god, don't tell me you went overboard.”
“I didn't go overboard. Just see.”
He hands you the first present, the glitter-covered bag shining in your eyes. You pull out a pack of satin bonnets, in various colors from blue to pink.
“You know I got a bunch of these, right?”
“It doesn't hurt to have more.” You pulled out the same pack, and Miguel quickly grabbed it. Uh, wait. I think those are mine.”
“You got some bonnets too?”
“The nice lady at the register gave them to me for free, and I thought, ‘We could match.’”
“We could.”
You open the pack and choose the blue one, putting it on. Miguel did the same and you two quickly go in for a cute selfie.
“There’s more.” Out of the bag, there's a hoodie with the same satin texture. “Just in case you didn't feel like wearing your bonnet.”
“Why would I sleep in my hoodie though?”
“Sometimes the heat doesn't work in these buildings.”
You snort and pull out a few satin pillowcases. Miguel doesn't look at you and pretend the bakers making cheese-stuffed bread was more interesting. Only to get smacked in the face with one.
“How many satin-related items did you buy?”
“Only those!”
“Are you sure?” You started digging into the bag, but your suspicions were relieved when there was nothing else.
“See?”
“There’s still another bag.”
Miguel handed you the next one, a bit smaller and lighter than the first one. You raised your brow, and he swore on his life that there was nothing else related to satin.
Instead, you pulled out a pink sweatshirt, white shorts, and matching sneakers. Miguel gave himself another mental pat on the back for getting your sizes right.
“We don't have to workout every day, but I thought if you do want to go to the gym with me, we could wear these one day.”
He went into his dresser and pulled out the same pair.
“I can't believe you wanna match with me.”
“I love you. I'd wear anything you wear.”
“Careful, I might take it to heart.”
“Please do.” Miguel held your hand in his, “I would wear anything you'd ask, I'm so serious.”
“Miguel…” You pushed the gifts aside to kiss him. His hands are on your back, not once having you part ways from him. Your giggles are absorbed into his mind as his lips cover your face.
Now, he could bring up his next present.
“You should sit on my face.”
“You know it’s my birthday, right?”
“I know.” Miguel tugged along the hum of your pajama pants, “This is another one of my gifts to you.”
Your eyes flicker with uncertainty, not meeting his gaze. “You know I’m heavy.”
“Baby, do I need to bring up how much I lifted last week?”
He met your eyes. Of course, he wouldn’t force you into something you didn’t want to do. He wanted to cater to you in any way he could.
“Okay.” Miguel would get up and click his heels together if he could. “You have to pinch me if I’m smothering you.”
“I don’t care if I die in between your legs.”
“Miguel…”
“Okay, okay.” He gave you a reassuring peck, “I will.”
GymRat! Miguel who felt his pants getting tight already when you slowly pull off your pants. You’re taking your time, as if you were waiting for him to back out and change your mind. He was adamant. He wanted you on his face. Nothing will change his mind about that.
He helped you maneuver on the bed. Already he can see your pretty cunt above him. Your thick thighs enclosed around his head. He’s had too many dreams about this.
“Don’t hover. You better sit.”
“Fine.”
Once you sit, he’s immediately on you.
Miguel can’t help but groan into your cunt, you being his most favorite thing to taste. His fingertips press along your thighs to make sure you keep steady. His tongue parted your folds and bumped along your clit. The tip circled around it, making you shift above him.
His toes curl, hearing your sweet sounds of pleasure. Not to mention with every flick of his tongue, your thighs squeeze along his head. Miguel grunted into your pussy when you do that. Your hips rock into his face, and he moves with you. His lips enclose around your clit to suck on it.
“Aah!”
Miguel placed a hand on your back, not stopping when he sucks once more. He’s rock-hard at this point. The urge to pull down his pants to fuck you was increasing. He flattened his tongue and licked a stripe up, your back following the same motion. You grip his hair after that. Miguel’s tip leaking cum when you pull on it. A shiver surrounded him, groaning to get you to do it again. You get the hint.
He’s alternating between sucking your sensitive bud and prodding your hole with his tongue. Surrounded by all of you, the love of his life. Miguel’s tone was light when he mentioned being okay to die between your legs. But he was serious.
The rocking of your hips picks up speed. The tight grip he has on your thighs waver, having trouble keeping you steady while eating you out. He knew you were close when your thighs tightened around him. You’re whimpering, begging for him to keep going.
“Please don’t stop, please I’m almost there…”
Miguel doesn’t. One last suck to your clit, causing you to tremble above him. Your moans reaching to the ceiling while you squeeze around him tighter. It does get harder to breathe but he doesn’t tell you that. He inhaled when he could, prolonging your orgasm by circling your clit.
He masked his disappointment when you got off—licking his lips while watching you come down from your high.
“You got any more gifts for me?”
Miguel pretended to think it over, “I think I have a few...”
Your naked body was pressed along the wall. He sunk his wrapped cock into you while his tongue brushed along yours. Miguel made sure your legs were tight around his waist, holding the underside of your thighs.
He thrusted up into you, shaking the room of his apartment. It’s a very good thing Peter wasn’t here. Miguel’s been wanting to do this to you for a long time. His quick thrusts into your slick sex, you holding on to the nape of his neck while crying in his shoulder. He hoped all of the other presents didn’t compare to this.
“You feel so good…” Miguel muttered, focusing on your plump, delectable body. “So good…”
You couldn’t say anything back as his tip pressed along your G-spot. Your mouth wide open, eyes rolled to the back of your head. He swore he could see a dribble pool from the corner of your lips. His grunting and groaning align with your moaning and whimpering. The melodic sound of skin smacking against skin in the background.
“Oh, I love you…I love you…” You babbled, nails digging into his neck.
Miguel shuddered, thrusts faltering. “I love you too.”
With the combined sensation of his pelvis rubbing along your clit and his cock hitting your cervix, it doesn’t take long for you to climax again. Your walls around him cause his balls to tighten. Miguel wasn’t too far behind, and he unloaded into the condom. His heavy breath fanning your head.
GymRat! Miguel coated your face with kisses before nuzzling your neck. Still having enough strength, he placed you on his bed, not resisting to give you another kiss, especially since your face had a look of pure bliss.
“Happy birthday.”
#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel x reader#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o hara x reader#x reader#x chubby reader#x plus size reader#miguel o'hara#atsv miguel#miguel o'hara smut#miguel fanfic#slushycoookie writes
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Just friends
Lucy Bronze x Reader
Summary: Lucy has been your girlfriend for three years already, but lately, she's spending more time with Ona than with you. Is she falling out of love with you?
Word count: almost 4.2k
A/N: I'm back with another Lucy fic:) Thanks to @helen-with-an-a for the inspiration:) I still have a few requests that I want to finish soon, but I'm currently swamped with uni stuff... so be patient with me. Also, there is a happy end cause my heart can't take pure Angst hahaha. I hope you enjoyy
Warnings: Anxiety, struggling with self-worth, concussion, vomiting, angsty in general, if I missed something lmk:)
Living in sunny Barcelona, playing for one of the best clubs in the world and all of that with the love of your life. A pretty perfect life one would say. Well, currently, you are feeling none of that.
You are insecure. You always have been, but normally, Lucy is quick to pull you out of that mindset. You’ve struggled with self-worth your whole life. Always thinking everyone is better than you. It has gotten better since you started dating Lucy over three years ago, but one of your biggest insecurities is still that she’ll get sick of you and leave you for someone better.
You know Ona is just a friend. She’s Spanish and they’re really close, so of course there will be lots of physical contact. You don’t mind that. You’re not jealous. You’re just scared Lucy will fall out of love with you and in love with Ona.
All the edits on Tiktok and insta were not helping. It got so bad that Lucy tried to block the hashtags on your accounts. It worked for a while but not long.
As Lucy spends the third afternoon in a row with Ona, you start to get even more insecure and a bit pissed to be honest. “Again? I thought we wanted to go to the beach today”, You ask a bit annoyed. “Am I not allowed to spend time with my friends anymore?”, Lucy asks defensive, not liking your tone. You just sigh and say, “Never mind, have fun”, you say and go into the bedroom.
Lucy doesn’t bother to come after you. You have been having the same discussion for days already. Lucy completely oblivious to the fact that your anxiety is bad at the moment, instead thinking you’re jealous. You change into some shorts and a crop top before going back into the living room, ready to take Narla to the beach instead. However, Narla is gone, too. Lucy must’ve taken her with her to Ona.
Great, you don’t even have your cuddle buddy now. Sighing again, you dry the tears that have escaped your eyes. You grab a hat and sunglasses and go to the beach on your own. Needing to spend your time somehow and the beach and ocean help clear your head.
You get home late, just needing the time to think. “Where have you been?”, is the first thing you hear when you get in before you come face to face with an angry Lucy and an excited Narla. “The beach”, you just say as you squat down to greet the dog. “Until now? You couldn’t look at your phone? I was worried out of my mind!”, Lucy asks loudly.
“I haven’t looked at my phone since I left the house”, you just say without looking at the brunette. “Y/N I’m talking to you! I was worried”, She says angrily. You flinch slightly at her tone. The tears you worked so hard to fight back threatening to escape. You look up and say “I’m sorry. I needed to think. I didn’t realize how late it was getting “, you say quietly, trying to stay busy with scratching Narla’s little belly.
“Next time, look at your phone”, Lucy just says and turns around before getting back to the couch. You cuddle Narla a bit longer, the Westie noticing the inner turmoil in you.
Eventually, you stand up and head into the living room as well. “How was your time with Ona?”, you ask quietly. “You gonna get jealous again if I say good?”, Lucy grumbles. “Lucy, I’m not jealous!”, you say defensively.
“Oh really? Then why are we having this same fight over and over again?”, she asks, looking at you. “Because you’re spending every free minute with her. It’s like you’re attached at the hip. I’m sorry I want to spend time with you too”, you argue.
“Yeah sure, that’s the reason. I’m sorry I’m spending time with my friends. Damnit, Y/N! It’s obvious you’re jealous, at least own up to it!”, Lucy yells, and that cuts deep. That sentence just lets something snap in you. “You want me to own up to it? Fine! I’m NOT fucking jealous Lucy! I’m scared. I’m scared you’re falling in love with Ona! I’m scared you’ll drop me as soon as she says yes”, you yell with tears streaming down your cheeks, letting yourself be vulnerable in front of Lucy.
“Oh don’t be ridiculous! Ona and I are friends, and that’s it! You should hear yourself. It’s absurd. Stop making a big deal out of nothing”, Lucy dismisses your fear. She has never done that before. She knows how your mind works and what she just said will make you spiral. Apparently, though, she doesn’t care.
You just look at her and dry your tears roughly. Giving her a nod before you head away from her. “Where are you going?”, Lucy asks, confused. She can see you’re still angry. “Why do you care? I thought I’m just being dramatic”, you snarl as she notices that her choice of words maybe were not the smartest.
“Y/N”, Lucy tries half-heartedly. “No. Not once have you treated me like this. You act like I’m not even here! You don’t pay attention unless I’m saying something about Ona. You know how much that hurts?”, you yell tearfully. “Now you’re exaggerating…”, Lucy says with an eye roll. You just look at her in disbelief and give her a nod. You swallow hard and say “I’m going to bed.”
With that, you leave her alone in the living room and head to the bedroom. Normally, you never go to bed angry. That is one rule that’s important to both of you. Well, tonight, the rule will be broken. By the time she comes to bed, you act like you’re asleep already. She still kisses your head, but you just pull away from her slightly.
You hear her sigh softly, but she doesn’t say anything. Eventually, you fall into a restless sleep.
As the alarm goes off the next morning, Lucy turns it off, and you just sigh. “Good morning”, Lucy says gently. “Morning”, you just grumble before you sit up with your back to her. “Seriously? You’re still pissed? Come on, it’s getting ridiculous”, Lucy says with an eye roll. You turn to her and say “Even if I wouldn’t be pissed anymore, I would be again after this comment. But yeah, of course I’m the ridiculous one. Because God forbid your stubborn brain could acknowledge that maybe you’re not as innocent as you tell yourself you are.”
You just get up and get into the bathroom. Lucy doesn’t say anything and just sighs. She really does not understand what your problem is. You get ready separately, but you’re not hungry, so you just grab a protein bar and gel to eat before practice.
The drive to the training grounds is quiet. You don’t say a word. Once in the locker room, you quickly change, but your teammates notice the tension between the two of you.
Mapi comes in just as you’re almost done changing. “Oh trouble in paradise?”, she asks with a slight tease. As an answer, you just grab your boots and drinks before walking out of the locker room.
Mapi just looks concerned at Lucy, the teasing smile wiped from her face. You normally enjoy Mapi’s teasing or at least chuckle slightly. “She’s been like that since we fought last night”, Lucy says with a soft sigh. “Last night?”, Alexia asks. Most of your team knew your rule to never go to bed angry. So as Lucy nods, most of them look concerned at each other. This has to be a bad fight.
Everyone can tell you’re not in the mood during practice. You play a lot more aggressively than usual. But not the type of aggressive that would hurt another.
You’re pushing yourself hard today, just needing to get out the frustration somehow. As you do a quick round of scrimmage halfway through practice, you run into the box to be on the end of a nice cross from Frido. However you’re a bit late, so you jump in at full speed, trying to find the ball and head it in. One of those flying headers Lucy is known for. Ona, however, is there to defend you, and since she’s running backwards, she doesn’t see you throwing yourself in for the ball.
You crash together, and the collision makes you hit the ball with your temple, unable to get it into the goal. You both land on the ground roughly, you a few feet away from Ona because of the speed you had come with.
You both groan for a moment, stars appearing in front of your eyes momentarily, your head throbbing. You close your eyes for a second, but as you hear Lucy’s voice, you open your eyes. However, her question, if you’re okay, is not directed at you. She is squatting next to Ona. That was it. Yes, Ona was lying closer to Lucy, but still.
“You okay?”, Frido asks you softly, and you just mumble “I’m fine.” You get up as Lucy walks up to you, resting a hand on your shoulder, but you immediately shrug it off and say “Don’t touch me. Don’t act like you care now.” The team has never seen you so angry. You just walk away from the brunette and make your way back to your position.
You high five Ona, not angry at her for the tackle. You squeeze the bridge of your nose slightly as you walk back. God, your head is throbbing. Your world is spinning, and you’re not feeling good at all. You try to shake it off, but Alexia can tell, so she rests a hand on your shoulder and asks “You okay, y/n/n?”
You don’t answer her trying to gather yourself. However, you only drop to all fours a few steps later as the dizziness becomes too overwhelming. “Y/N!”, Alexia yells and quickly waves the physios over.
“What’s wrong, Y/N?”, the Physio asks, and you can only mumble “Dizzy, head throbbing.” Your ears were ringing slightly as you struggle to keep your composure. They look into your eyes and can see that they are unfocused. “Where did you hit the ball?”, he asks softly, having an idea what might be going on.
Your hand moves to your temple and the spot right next to your ear as you almost lose balance and face plant the grass. The physios steady you, and he says, “Yeah, that might be a concussion, let’s get you off the field and checked out.”
“Let me help”, Lucy says, wanting to help you up. “No, please just leave me alone”, you shrug off her hands with tears in your eyes. Alexia steps in and pulls you to your feet before guiding you to the physio room.
“What happened between you? Talk to me”, Alexia asks on the way, knowing the tears are from the emotional pain, not the physical. “We fought badly. She’s been spending a lot of time with Ona lately and ditches our plans for her. You know I’m not jealous. I know they’re just friends, but I’m scared Lucy is starting to fall in love with her and just waits to drop me. However, she completely dismisses my concern, telling me I’m ridiculous and dramatic. I don’t want her here. It’s like I’m not even there anymore. It's always just Ona”, you tell her tearfully, she wraps you in her arms for a second while you sob.
After a minute, you get it together, and Alexia presses a kiss to your head. “I know me saying this won’t help, but Lucy only has eyes for you, but I understand. I tell her not to come in here, but you gotta promise me you’ll talk to each other, okay?”, She says seriously. You just nod before you lie back on the physio bed.
Alexia leaves, and the physio checks you for a concussion. “So you said you’re head hurts and you’re dizzy, any other symptoms?”, he asks softly, shining a light into your eyes. “Nausea, sensitivity to light. I feel a bit out of it”, you answer, and he just nods. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure this is a mild concussion. The ball really hit you on an unfortunate spot. You should feel better after a few days, but for now let’s get you home and get some rest. No straining activities, keep yourself hydrated, and get some sleep, alright?”, he asks, and you nod.
He helps you get changed before driving you home. The motion of the car makes the nausea so much worse that you throw up as soon as you're home. You try to rest and sleep, but your head won’t let you. The thoughts just crashing on each other making you restless, so you pull on your sunglasses and a hat, grab your headphones to dampen the sounds and make your way to one of your favorite spots at the beach. It’s not a long walk, so you’re fine. The area is usually not filled with many people, so you just lean against the railing and look out on the sea as you sink into your thoughts.
Meanwhile, Alexia walks back out to see everyone have a small water break. Lucy is standing with Keira and Ona, nibbling on the bottle nervously. “How is she?”, she asks Alexia, concerned. “She’s hurt, not just physically. Lucy, what the hell is going on with you? You know how Y/N is, you can’t tell her she’s dramatic and ridiculous, thinking she won’t spiral”, Alexia says a bit angry. Everyone on the team knows that you need reassurance, especially when those thoughts in your head get too loud. And they all could see that was the case lately. “What?”, Keira and Ona ask at the same time as they look at Lucy disappointed. “She was going on and on about how I keep spending time with you and never with her. I just figured she was jealous, and it isn’t a big deal. And as she told me she’s scared I will fall in love with you just something in me snapped, I couldn’t stop it”, Lucy tries to argue quietly as she looks at Ona, but she knows she’s in the wrong here.
Alexia just smacks her hard in the back of the head and grumbles “Estúpida!” “Lucy, her logical brain knows that there is just friendship between us. But you know how insecure she can get, and it’s been getting worse again lately. You should’ve been more attentive”, Ona says, disappointed. “Yeah you better fix this before it's too late”, Keira says seriously, and Lucy just sighs, realizing that she really messed up. “Right now she doesn’t want to see you, I think she has a mild concussion so give her some space, but you guys gotta talk tonight”, Alexia says and gives the brunette a little shove back onto the field.
At the end of practice, Lucy immediately runs to the physio room, but you’re gone. „Where is she?“, Lucy asks the physio as he comes in. „I drove her home. She needs rest“, he says, and she just looks worried at him. „Lucy, relax. It’s just a mild concussion. The ball just hit her at the wrong spot. She’ll be okay in a few days“, he says reassuringly, but it does little to calm her worries. She pushes her hair out of her face and takes a deep breath. „I know, I just really messed up. Thank you for driving her home. I gotta go“, Lucy says and jogs into the locker room. Changing with the speed of light before grabbing her bag and running out again. She doesn’t have time for a shower. She needs to get to you.
Speeding home, she runs in and looks around for you, but the apartment is empty. Grabbing her phone, she calls Alexia. „She’s not here“, Lucy says as soon as Alexia picks up. „Lucy, calm down. What?“, Alexia says, still in the locker room with most of the girls. Ona and Keira look up as Lucy‘s name falls, coming a bit closer so they can hear too. „She’s not here. Y/N is not here. She was told to rest, where is she? What if something happened?“, Lucy asks, worried. Rechecking all the rooms. „Hey Luce, calm down. Come on, take a deep breath“, Ona says, and Lucy rubs a hand over her face before taking a deep breath. „Think. Is there any place Y/N could be? Any place she likes to go to think?“, Keira asks gently but worried about you as well.
The line is silent for a moment as Lucy tries to think. „Isn’t there a spot at the beach close to your apartment that she likes?“, Alexia asks as she remembers you telling her about something like that. „Yeah, I think I know where she is. I‘ll keep you updated, thank you“, Lucy says and hangs up before she grabs her keys and phone and is out the door again. Leaving a completely confused Narla behind.
She sends a quick text to Ona and asks her if she could take Narla out while she was looking for you, which she, of course, does. She runs almost the whole way to the beach. As she gets to the part where it is quiet and especially during this time empty, she sees you leaning at the railing. She sends a quick „I found her“, message to the three girls and packs her phone away. Catching her breath, she slowly approaches you.
„What are you doing here?“, you just ask without looking at the brunette. You know exactly who it is without having to take a look. „I wanted to make sure you’re okay“, Lucy says softly, taking your headphones from your ears carefully. You look at her, your eyes hiding behind your sunglasses. „As you can see I’m fine“, you just say.
“Y/N, I’m sorry. Can we please talk?”, Lucy asks softly. “What? You just wanna tell me I’m ridiculous again? I can deal without, thank you”, You just say and turn to look out to the sea again. “Hey, no”, Lucy says and guides your chin back to look at her. She pushes your sunglasses up to look into your eyes and says honestly “I messed up badly, and I’ve been an ass. I didn’t pay attention and did not treat you like you deserve. I’m sorry. I know a simple I’m sorry won’t do it, but I need you to know that.”
“You know how disgusting it feels to be treated like you make a big deal out of nothing, when it’s all you can think about? When your insecurities and anxiety get dismissed with a simple, you’re being ridiculous? You know how I am Lucy. My logical brain knows that Ona and you are just friends. A simple reassurance and afternoon spend together would’ve fixed everything, but instead, you had to treat me like a piece of shit. Like I’m just this jealous clingy girlfriend. Do you know how much that hurt? To feel like you’re throwing three years away just like that? I’m not asking you to stop spending time with her or not checking on her when she goes down during practice, but, for fucks sake, don’t take me for granted. I don’t need much, but if you want this relationship, you gotta treat me with the respect and love I deserve. Because I can’t take whatever this is much longer. Love me or leave me, that simple”, you tell her as tears start to fall from your eyes. The more words leave your mouth the more tears fall.
She knows how fast you can spiral, but she hasn’t expected it to be this bad. She gently dries your tears as she starts to tear up a bit herself. “Y/N I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I acted like that. I should’ve seen how much my behavior hurt you. Instead, I just kept going and didn’t pay attention. I was wrong, and you didn’t deserve that. I never wanted you to even think about doubting that my love for you is still there. I messed up, and yes, I took you for granted without noticing, and I’ll never forgive myself for that. Y/N, I love you. I love you so much, and I don’t know how my head got so messed up that I stopped trying to show that to you. I’m truly sorry, I promise to make it up to you if you let me. I promise, I love you like you deserve because you deserve the world, my love”, Lucy says honestly, and you just hiccup slightly, trying not to sob. This is all you needed to hear, but you spiraled so deep you’re not sure if you can trust her words.
“Are you just saying this, or is this the truth?”, you ask tearfully. “It’s the truth, please let me make it up to you and love you like you deserve”, Lucy says softly, scared that she really messed up so bad that she’s past the point of a second chance. “Okay”, you mumble quietly, praying you won’t regret trusting her. You’re just in a bad place mentally, and it’s hard to even trust Lucy.
As she hears the okay, she’s quick to pull you into her arms and kisses your forehead. She holds you close, and you cling to her, crying into her chest. Tears are falling down her cheeks as well, but her focus is on you. She needs to take care of you now, treating you like you deserve.
It takes you a few minutes to calm down, Lucy’s heartbeat being able to pull you out of those dark clouds in your head and into a more relaxed state. But that also makes you feel the symptoms of the concussion again. It’s a blessing and a curse. You squeeze your eyes shut as your world spins.
Lucy can tell how unsteady you’re getting, so she just tightens her grip on you and says “Shh, I got you, my love. Let me take care of you.” You just clutch her shirt tightly, leaning on her heavily. Your head pounding. “Let’s get you home. You want me to call a cab to get us home?”, Lucy asks softly as she kisses your head. “No, the motion makes me throw up. I’ll be okay, just give me a minute”, you mumble and try to breathe through the pain and dizziness.
“Take your time, I’ll carry you if you need me too”, Lucy says, and you know she will, but it’s a 15-minute walk to your shared apartment. “Yeah and then you won’t be able to walk for the next three days because of your knee”, You tease weakly. Lucy can’t help but smile at this slight return of banter. “It’s worth it for you”, Lucy just says with a soft shrug and smiles before she kisses your forehead.
You just smile softly and rest against her for a moment longer, taking a few deep breaths. “Okay, I’m ready”, you mumble, and Lucy wraps an arm around your waist to steady you while you make your way home slowly. “When you need a break, tell me”, Lucy says and kisses your temple gently, and you nod.
To be fair, by the time you’re almost home, she is half carrying you. You’re exhausted and definitely pushed yourself too hard today after your concussion. The nausea gets worse the more you walk, so barely five minutes away you stop Lucy and start to throw up again into the grass without much of a warning. “Okay, I got you, love. Deep breaths”, Lucy says, gathering your hair and rubbing your back while keeping you steady. There is not much for you to throw up, so you calm down quickly, but your legs are threatening to give out.
“Do you want me to carry you on my back or bridal style? What do you think will make you less dizzy?”, Lucy asks, it’s not a question of if. It’s how you want to be carried. “Bridal”, you just mumble quietly. Being able to hide your face in Lucy’s neck sounds amazing. She picks you up immediately and carries you the rest of the way home. Did her knee protest a bit? Yes, but she’d do it all over again without a thought.
Once home, she carries you to bed, and you’re greeted by Narla, who jumps on the bed and showers you in kisses. Lucy sets up a bucket and enough water before tucking you in. “Get some sleep. Rest that pretty head of yours. I’ll be here when you wake up”, Lucy says, running her fingers through your hair. “Promise?”, “Promise. I love you”, Lucy says softly.
“I love you too, I missed you”, you just mumble before you doze off. The last thing you feel is a kiss on your forehead.
#lucy bronze x reader#woso fanfics#lucy bronze#woso angst#ona batlle#alexia putellas#keira walsh#woso community#woso fic#woso x reader#barça femeni
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kate martin x photographer!reader….
Kate Martin: Kate x photographer!reader Headcannons
Summary: Request :)
Warnings: little NSFT on the bottom, all fluff other than that!!
AN: Guys I am actually writing this in the bathroom at 1 AM because we have no wifi/cell service in my bedroom so its not proof read well
FRIEND ERA:
♠︎ You guys initially met during a seminar you both shared, she sat next to you while you were editing photos and was very distracted by your screen the whole class
♦︎ After that she just kept sitting next to you until she built up the confidence to ask about you work
“Hi, sorry if this is weird but you are such a good photographer! I have seen your photos during class and stuff… is it your job?” You smiled at her praise, you had seen her looking at your screen for the past few classes so you were happy she finally said something. “Thanks!! I'm not, but I hope one day I can be!”
♣︎ It took her about a year to convince you to start doing photos for the basketball team because you didn’t have a lot of confidence in your work at first and you didn't know a ton about sports photography
♥︎ Always your biggest hype women and would always insist on accompanying you to shoots or posing you you
♠︎ During practices she would always try to show off so you would take more photos of her
“Y/N! Wait I'm gonna do something cool, get a photo of this” “Did you get it?” “Does it look cool?” *you can hear Gabbie and Cait making fun of her in the background*
♦︎ Whenever she had a water break she would be peering over your shoulder trying to look at the photos you took
♣︎ She loves watching you edit, download and share photos. She would lie on your bed for hours just silently watching and adding little comments here and there
♥︎Always makes fun of you for taking a lot of photos of her (you can't help it, she's just very pretty)
“Jeez y/n how many did you take?” you scrolled down through the file you had just downloaded, “Uhh I guess a lot more than I thought…”
DATING ERA:
♣︎ Kates Instagram is never low when it comes to photos due to the huge amounts you take of her
♥︎ When she gets drafted to the Aces, you move in with her and join the photography crew there
♠︎ Her praise increases tenfold and she is so supportive of your career and you work
You groaned letting your head fall in your hands, for some reason none of the photos looked right. Sliding off the bed Kate came up behind you to wrap her arms around your shoulders. “Whats wrong baby?” sighing you pulled you head up, wresting it back against Kates shoulder. “They all look weird! I haven't taken any good photos for a while, I’m scared their gonna drop me from the crew.” Spinning you around in your chair Kate looked at you in your eyes, “Baby you are an amazing photographer, and they would be beyond stupid to let you go. I know you have something good in there because I loved everything I saw during practice. Why don't we just go eat and then we can look at it again with a fresh set of eyes, okay?” You sighed and nodded, standing up and pulling Kate into a hug.
♦︎ Constantly buying you more equipment and cameras. Any tool or piece of equipment you mention bring interested in… its on your desk next week
♣︎ She insisted that you teach her how to take photos, and for her birthday you bought her a cute little camera
“Hey Katie baby, can I see the photos you took?” She smilled excitedly at you as she handed you her camera. As you flipped through, you began to notice a common theme in all of these photos. “Baby, I love these but did you take any photos without me in them?” (she didn't)
♠︎ always showing off your photos and plugging your website like crazy to anyone she meets
♥︎ The hard launch is very photo perfect- but also super cute and natural
♦︎You always wear her jersey when you take photos during games and your photos are still very Kate heavy
NSFT
♥︎ Nudes go crazy.
#wbb fanfiction#wbb x reader#kate martin#iowa wbb#iowa women’s basketball#kate martin fanfiction#katemartin#iowa wbb fanfiction#kate martin fluff#kate martin headcannons#kate martin fanfic#kate x reader#kate martin x oc#kate martin smut#kate martin x reader#kate martin angst#kate martin fic#kate money martin#kate martin blurb#kate martin x y/n#iowa wbb headcannons#university of iowa#las vegas aces fanfic#lv aces#aces fanfic#friends to lovers#headcannons#wbb headcannons#wbb#lgbtqia
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