#golf shirts at walmart

[kidkubrick]

you could literally be an intern at HHM and come out to howard as trans so that he could then send out the proper notices to change your name on paperwork and stuff- tell him purely as a formality- BUT ALL OF A SUDDEN hes calling you "son" and "kiddo", asking if you know how to play golf. wanna learn?? "nice beard" (it is a single whisker), "looking sharp big man" (he has seen me in sweatpants and my pajama shirt buying frozen pizza at a walmart).

[ramblingcecimonster]

On the Train to Success

The night sky turns gray with the ache of dawn and I watch a tired young couple pass a cup of coffee and a lit cigarette back and forth on their postage stamp scrap of a porch that looks like the gentlest of breezes could detach it from their trailer. We don’t make eye contact or anything, but something about their expressions, in the split second before the train rambles speedily down the track, is familiar to me. I can imagine a colicky baby finally sleeping or a sick toddler whose fever finally broke, a pile of bills, a car that needs gas, an empty fridge. I know what white trash looks like, what “trying our best,” “secondhand furniture,” “buy one get one free sale,” “too much month at the end of our money” look like. Sure, we wear it like pride: hard-working folks, trying our best, willing to bend over backwards for our neighbors. Wearing dusty shoes and worn-out jeans and fixing whatever just broke until it literally cain’t be fixed no more. But it’s a tired existence. Hungry. Worn.

It's an existence I don’t know from childhood. It’s not how I grew up. I grew up with polo shirts and golf sweaters and country clubs and new cars and back-to-school shopping at the LL Bean. We never went to the Walmart. We never cussed or ate day old food or had holes in our shoes. I didn’t know what a factory looked like, but I went on vacation twice a year. I grew up with angry parents who absolutely knew better. (Some folks ain’t got resources, they’re just doing what’s always been done, raising their babies up the way they were raised, with no knowledge that giving your kid soda in a baby bottle or sending them out for a switch really ain’t what to do. They don’t necessarily know not to expose their kids to drugs or alcohol or driving without a license or whatever else it was that my folks looked down their noses at. If their kids went to bed without dinner, it was because there weren’t money for dinner, not because their kids did something wrong. They aren’t bad people, they ain’t bad parents, and they love their kids. They just ain’t got no money and they don’t know better than the only life they’ve ever known. My parents weren’t those kind of parents.) They knew better than to starve their teenager or to keep their fourth grader up all night as punishment. They knew better than to punish any expression of emotion with psychiatric medications and trips to a private psychiatric hospital. They knew better than to keep me isolated, gaslit, and terrified. But they did it anyway. In our ivory tower, silver spoon world, as long as you wore the “right” clothes and said the “right” words, if your parents went to church on Sundays and volunteered their time and had you in youth soccer or Boy Scouts and were good enough at lying, nobody questioned everything. I learned not to trust the cops not because my parents’ car insurance expired 4 months ago or whatever else it is that law enforcement likes to punish poor folks for because they’re poor. I learned not to trust cops because when I ran away from home after being spat on and getting kicked in the head at 14 years old for taking food from the pantry because I was starving, the cop wanted to know why a kid from such a nice home and such a nice family would run away like that. Because my parents labeled me the problem, a liar, and not to be trusted, so I knew nothing I said would be believed or even matter. I watched my abusers lie straight to the police officer’s face, and knew in that moment that the whole system was a sham.

But I was nonetheless raised to believe that poor people were somehow a problem, that they were morally deficient. So imagine my surprise when the family that came to my rescue when I got summarily kicked out at 16 by the suburban couple from hell was a truck driver and a high school teacher. Poor, tired, with lines on their faces and miles and miles on their shoes. My new mama worried loudly. It was no secret that she worried about every last one of her babies – about our grades, our futures, our relationships, our emotional states. We are the same person, and the older I get the more I open my mouth and the words I find leaving my throat are just TL. Mama G with a little more therapy under the belt and far more colorful hair tendencies. She taught high school English at a military boarding school, so she knows a thing or two about angry teenagers and how to navigate the emotional hell of abandoned children. I knew her first, recognized her as safe first. With her black pencil skirts and schoolmarm bun, standing stock still at my track meets because sometimes all you need is someone who is there. She cooked like a maestro, picked out nail polish colors, introduced me to Patrick Swayze, drank cheap beer, and watched baseball in a way that involved far more screaming than I was used to. She loved summer nights and all her babies and hated the cold and the fact that her husband smoked.

But my daddy is a different breed of human. Quietly there. There’s a quote in one of my favorite books, about a young girl’s adoptive father. “Trust was accumulated quickly, due primarily to the brute strength of the man’s gentleness, his thereness. The girl knew from the outset that Hans Huberman would always appear midscream, and he would not leave” (Markus Zusak, The Book Thief). I was a hurt, angry, insomniac teenager. I was lost and lonely and broken. And when I woke up in the middle of the night, unable to sleep, he was there in the living room, watching some horrible made-for-tv action movie or crime drama. We watched most of Criminal Minds together in that quiet living room. We didn’t speak, but sometimes we’d go do the grocery shopping at Walmart at the crack of dawn before anyone else in the house was awake, me in my superhero pajamas and him in his cargo pants and t-shirt – the same outfit he’s worn nearly every day of my entire life. We’d stop for sweet tea at the McDonald’s on the way home. I helped him fix the cars and he existed. A phone call away. He called me Missy and I called him Dude. He spoke my language, the language of broken and angry and abandoned teenager. His there-ness, his appearance on the other end of my phone in the middle of every panicked scream assured me that as bad as it got sometimes, it would never be as bad as it once was. He told me with a laugh that he was born white trash, and he’d die white trash, and there wasn’t a lot he could do about it in the meantime. He budgeted and scrapped and saved nails and screws and stripped wire. He worried quietly.

A friend of mine joked, when I was fresh out of college and trying desperately to figure out how to actually be a human person who understood relationships and emotions and how to live in a world that terrified the shit out of me, that I was like Athena. That one morning, Craig had woken up with a headache to beat the band, and then I popped out of his skull, fully formed, angry, and ready for war. I was on a battlefield against the world, against myself, against anyone who might try to hurt me. Some days, I wonder if Zeus ever worried about Athena the way I know my daddy worried about me. Did Zeus ever wonder what his tired, angry daughter might be like if he had been given the time to raise her up the way she ought to have been raised? To channel that righteous furious energy into something beautiful, like the drums or boxing or who-knows-what. To tell his brilliant, decisive, strategic daughter that it was okay to take a deep breath and trust the world a little. Did Zeus ever worry that it was too late for all that? That his war-torn daughter was already too covered in her own blood to be able to take a full breath and wash it all clean.

Because I know Craig worried about me. I know he still does. I know the face of world-worn, tired parents on a middle-of-nowhere back porch drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes they meant to quit 10 years ago is familiar. It’s familiar the same way “Hey Missy, whatcha doin’?” is familiar, the same way the smell of old spice and Marlboros on the coat you wear to go haul the dog back inside because it’s the one closest to the door and it’s 10pm and it’s January is familiar. He worries about this child born of fury and fear might tumble headlong into something, eyes closed, head first, can’t lose, that they can’t find their way out of. That maybe my heart won’t stop beating a little too fast, that the drumbeat I run to is just a little too off step, that one day someone will try to convince me I didn’t deserve to be free. He won’t ever really say, but when you’ve spent hours in silence with someone while you were learning to be a human person, you learn to read their expression, their voice. The way they pretend not to cry on the day of your college graduation or on the day you drive away from their house with a U-Haul holding all of your worldly possessions attached to your Jeep on the way to California. The way they know you’re having a panic attack over the phone before you’ve even said anything, they way their voice catches just a little bit when you tell them you got into the PhD program. The way their eyes change just a little when you start talking about your something and they tell every store they deliver to how smart and wonderful their kid is.

So, when I saw that dawn-tired young couple, and imagined them a child and a sea of bills to pay, on a train on my way to a conference where I’m presenting twice, I may not have known them, but I recognized them. I recognized them in the way my daddy looks at the sky to ponder the weather while he’s rebuilding the deck after my mama fell through, in the way he checks the route and the road conditions and the name of the hotel and asks what day I’m presenting when I head to a conference in a city he’s never been to do, to do things he hardly ever imagined possible. I recognized them in the dreams they have for their hypothetical, imaginary child. I recognized them in the way you can’t pretend you don’t have an accent, but you read the etiquette books and know all the right things to say and read and research relentlessly and watch your child accomplish things that you – and they – never thought were possible. I recognized them in the way the smoke curled but never took away the worry; the way some things just line your face a little more every year and when it’s four in the morning on a foggy fall morning and your kid is just doing the best they can, the only thing you have left to do is smoke and drink your coffee and hope you did enough. Worry the way I’m sure Zeus never did, but the way that I know Craig always will, that it won’t be enough, that being there, perpetually and permanently there won’t be enough.

But to me, to me and for my tired and worrying and world-worn parents, for that young couple outside my train window and all the trailer trash, poor, working class parents out there doing your best to put one foot in front of the other and make it to the end of the month without running out of money… some things are as lasting as the moon and the tides, and one of those is the act of not leaving. Of being there, of worrying the way Zeus never did, of doing the best with what you have to make sure that your kids – even, and perhaps especially, the angry, hurt, and terrified ones – know that you are there. That you will not leave them. That they are worth the world.

[nomorepartiesinhtx]

I was looking at clothes and shoes and honestly, some of you niggas cannot dress bc yall rather buy quick fashion over an actual piece. Invest in like 4-5 interchangeable high profile pieces that can be worn with anything, then build from there. Like I use to buy graphics from Walmart and shit every time I went out. Now I collect pieces. Mostly supreme graphics, but it’s a high quality piece that can be interchangeable in my opinion. Cactus Jack is another brand but more so for hypebeast. Which is me unfortunately. But I rather have a $300 graphic over 10 shirts that was $8 a piece. The neck line be stretched n shit. Yuck. My next fashion item is bottoms/denim. If I can just get me a good 5-7 pieces, I can build from there. Shoe collection solid bc I have special releases and I have basics that are a must cop. I really wanna deep dive into men’s Louie ngl. But that’s a steeeeepppp price to pay for something I might just wear once. I don’t think I’m at that level yet. I need interchangeable pieces so that every time somebody see you they be like damn. Whole time, you swapping out the same 10-15 pieces. Louie v collection is just something I’ve been wanting to have for years. Pharrell did his big one. Golf Le Fleur is another brand I wanna get into, but mostly just his shoes. He has a couple cardigans I’ve seen previewed and that new college themed jacket he did was dope as hell. Bapesta’s are the next set of shoes I’m going for. Like I said the other day, I’m over Jordan’s just a lil bit. The thing is, I want special edition Bapesta’s. I oun want the basic color ways. That’s like the Freddy dunks and the crawfish dunks are probably the only pair of dunks I’d own. The rest of that shit poo. Slowly getting into 2’s, I just feel like they separate themselves from the others. Jordan didn’t replicate the 2’s like he did for 3-4. Same silhouette, just minor adjustments. Boo boring. Give me some better. 12’s have grown on me, but idk I’m iffy bout 12’s. Honestly if I we keeping it a buck, I’m bout to jump back on 1’s. Cause yall niggas is dickriders. 1’s was the highest selling shoe for YEARS. Y’all let Nike basically make a replica of Jordan 1 lows…. Ok. Not interested. And please don’t come around me with some fuckin mids on, you gone ruin my day.

[dango-daikazoku]

i spent money 2day!

did laundry ($5), went to marshalls and got a yoga peloton bike mat to workout on ($14.99 not including tax) apparently the retail price is $75, wow!

went to walmart and got a couple plant pot liners, new socks, discounted underwear! (one was missing from the pack so i got them 50% off [there was actually two missing but that's a secret teehee, i wanted to the blue one too lol]), a plastic elephant shaped watering can, and a steering wheel cover since my old one was in shambles ($47.71)

went to goodwill and got 3 more men's golf shirts ($15) i swear golf shirts are the best, they're collared (semi-professional looking), the fabric is so soft, and it doesn't wrinkle so you don't have to iron them at all, but i didn't get the ones that said "senior golf" on the back lol

then got my haircut ($25+$15 tip=$40)

my electric bill was also deducted today but that's to big of a number so i'm going to ignore it for now :3

[customsweaterproducer]

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[divabandits-blog]

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[the-technicolor-whiscash]

Really struck out at the Walmart today I managed to get more pants but they had absolutely nothing that read “I am a very short man but also a slut” and I was like well maybe I’ll buy another golf shirt but the only ones they had were full middle school basketball coach and I am not wearing That to work

[blusterb8]

It's transformation time for the snobbish, over-dressed Republican. First - Force him to sell all of his expensive business suits, silk ties, polished handmade dress shoes and socks, his designer shirts, cufflinks, belt, underwear, Rolex, his tuxedo, golf clothes, polo shirts, khakis, deck shoes, boots, wallet, Porsche and house and confiscate all his assets. Impeach him and make him live on welfare in a poor neighborhood with only walmart jumpsuits to wear. Give him tats, and earring and steal his razor so he has to grow a beard. Keep him barefoot. His arrogant, judgmental look will be gone.

Republikkkan Senator from Florida Rick Scott.

[mint-moon25]

SEATS - CLOSEST - 2 - EDGES - THIS - MORNING - THERE -

WAS - FREE - EXERCISE - CLASS - WITH - MAT - SO - NICE -

SONY - EARPHONES - FORGOT - EVENTUALLY - THAT - XO -

THEY - WERE - THERE - THE - UNDERLINE - BRICKELL HAI -

24/7 - DAILY - HOLIDAY - OPEN - LARGEST - SPONSOR - TO -

CREATE - PUBLIX - NEAR - LIGHT - GREEN - THEIR - TRUE -

COLORS - HRS - 7A - 10P - DAILY - MANY - GAY - MARRIED -

MEN - MARRIED - 2 - MEN - THERE - AT - PUBLIX - WALK -

STRAIGHT - R SIDE - MARY BRICKELL - VILLAGE - 2 FLRS -

ESPECIALLY - 2ND - FLOOR - THEY - WORK - OUT AS GAY -

AT - LA FITNESS - GENERALLY - NASTY - RECEPTION - AS -

THEY - ADDED - AMAZON - HUB - LOCKER - 2 - MAKE FUN -

OF - THOSE - NOT - MEMBERS - 2 - SEATS - 1 - MORE FOR -

U - WEAKLING - LOOKING - DO - THAT - AT - THE - RITZ -

CARLTON - GENTLY - REPLY - NEED - 2 - KNOW - I - GOT -

THE - CORRECT - MERCHANDISE - I - ORDERED - PINK -

SHIRT - NOT - GREEN - THE - UPS STORE - NEXT - TO -

BRICKELL - STATION - 2 - RETURN - BY - APP - EITHER -

SCAN - THEY - PROVIDE - BOX - AND - SHIP’G - LABEL -

OR - U - PROVIDE - 4 - EVERYTHING - EVEN - YOUR -

OLD - WALMART - BOX - WILL - DO - FREE - THEY XO -

DO - FINAL - TAPE - TOP - AND - BOTTOM - LET THEM -

KNOW - BOTTOM - IS - WEAK - OPENING - AMAZON -

BOX - 2 - RETURN - BY - THE - UPS - STORE OR XO -

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THEM - HRS - NOT - 24/7 - THEIR IMPORTANCE -

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MOZILLA - FIREFOX - THEME - 4 - ABOVE XO -

CHOSE - PURPLE - DARK - STARS - LIGHT’G -

THE - PURPLE - NIGHT - SKY - I’M - USING -

2 - EARLY - BRICKELL - CITY - CENTRE - SECURITY -

TELL - PEOPLE - WHO - SPENT - $5,000 - ALREADY -

2 - COME - BACK - RESTRAINING - ORDERS - AS U -

THEY - THINK - COMING - 2 - NEW - BRICKELL YES -

OPEN - 24/7 - SO - THEY - CAN - WALK - AND - SIT -

AT - THE - UNDERLINE - MBPS - NOT - THAT FAST -

OR - ENJOY - PUBLIX - FREE - WI FI - AND - THEY -

HAVE - MEDIUM - SIZE - RESTROOMS - LARGE -

MIRROR - BACK - OF - DOOR - WHEN - THEY -

TELL THEM - 2 - GET - LOST - AS - CASA TUA -

CUSINA - IT’s - LIKE - ITALIAN - ALSO - PASTA -

PIZZA - STEAK - HUEVOS - EGGS - BUSINESS -

HOURS - NEXT - 2 - BAD - NEWS - PRICES ITS -

NOT - LIKE - MANHATTAN - NEW YORK - THE -

MOST - OUTRAGEOUS - PRICES - REALLY -

CASA TUA CUCINA

BREAKFAST

9:30A - 11:30A

LUNCH - DINNER - DAILY

CLOSES - 10:30P

GROUND - LEVEL

4TH - FLOOR - TACOLOGY - 1A - CLOSES

ALSO - CUBAN - CUISINE - LECHON ASADO

JAPANESE - SUSHI - LATE - NIGHTERS YES

THE - ‘GET - LOST’ - WHEN - 9:30A - TRUE -

DIDN’T SUGGEST - 2 - ENJOY BREAKFAST -

GROUND - LEVEL - CASA TUA - CUCINA -

DAILY - BREAKFAST - ARMED - VIOLENT -

14TH - AMENDMENT - ‘WITH - DUE - PROCESS -

OF - THE - LAW’ - FR - GOLF - TANNED - TRUE -

HONORABLES - JUDGES - BRICKELL OBTAINED -

 RIGHT - 2 - DENY - PERSON - OF - LIFE - ALSO -

KIDS - (PRODUCE - MORE) - DEPRIVE PERSON -

OF - LIBERTY - THE - RIGHT - 2 - ACT - AS THEY -

PLEASE - (SAT - DOWN) - BLAH - BLAH - SO YES -

SAD - BUT - TRUE - MIAMI - 27TH - STATE - NOT -

ORIGINAL - 13 US STATES - FREE - FR - GREAT -

BRITAIN - HARSH - LAWS - TAXES - ALWAYS -

INCREASING - PRISONS - 4 - NON - GUILT 2 -

TAKEN - 2 - PUT - IN - SHIPS AS PRISONERS -

USA - TODAY - KINDLE - EXPIRED - SO FREE -

DOWNLOADS - AT - AMAZON - MY - AMAZON -

FIRE - TABLET - B 4 - OPENING - SHOWS -

LARGE - BOOKS - SO - FREE DOWNLOAD -

BEGINNING - SO - ADULT - COMMUNICATION -

$11 - AN - HOUR - COFFEE - BARISTERS - SO -

MANAGER - NOT - THERE - HE - SAID - NAME -

WILLIAM - MAYBE - THE - ‘S’ - WORD - 4 - SHE -

SAID - ‘180 DEGREES’ - HIS WEIRDO - RESPONSE -

‘THEIR - COMPANY - POLICY’ - USA - AGE 246 - AT -

LEAST - HER - PASSION - 4 - COFFEE - SUGGESTS -

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EARLY - BREAKFAST - MISOGYNY - HARM - AND -

ABUSE - OF - WOMEN - VERBAL - VIOLENCE - US -

GREAT - STARTING - SENTENCE - WHERE - CAN I -

REMOVE - DOWNLOAD - COVER - BLUE - EYES -

WHAT - MINE - USED - 2 - LOOK - LIKE - AND SO -

UGLY - HIS - EARS - ABOUT - NEW - BOSS - HE -

IS - SUPER - BOSSY - ROMANCE - BUT - AFTER -

COVER - THE FIRST - 2 PAGES - JUST LEFT AS -

I’M - LOOKING - ON - R SIDE - ESV - ENGLISH -

STANDARD - VERSION - PSALM 18 - OVER XO -

2,000 YRS - BEST - SELLER - FREE - APP AND -

OFFLINE - VS 1 - ‘I LOVE YOU - O LORD GOD’ -

ORIGINAL - HEBREW - ‘MY - STRENGTH’ - XO -

[jimmydemaret]

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[readyforthegarden]

I might out myself with this one

I am pretty ill and just having a hard time with it. I’m not mobile anymore, have no hair, and have such a hard time even thinking of common words. But tbh I think of how Josh would be such a good friend and support system through this. Like we know the boy is a saint! He would really put in the effort to force me to smile and gain just a little confidence back

Oh love, I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. I hope there’s an end in sight that brings you better days. I know I’m just a random girl who writes silly fics on the internet, but I want you know I’m in your corner and I’m praying and sending healing vibes for you to the universe!

Josh as a support system would be so amazing. He’s the friend that would give you the shirt off his back, so you know he’s more than willing to help with mobility issues. Look at his arms lately! He could for sure help you in and out of the car to go to appointments. And you know that appointment days are treat days with him. He’ll take you for ice cream in the summer and hot cocoa or lattes in the colder months. Sometimes if you have the energy and appetite, he’ll take you to a nice lunch and then to target or walmart. He has no issues pushing you around in a wheelchair if you need it. He’d prefer the fun of tossing you into a shopping cart and doing it that way, but the look of the old lady greeter as he hoists you into the basket makes him rethink. He makes sharp turns, makes silly racecar noises, anything to make you laugh and smile.

No hair? No problem. With his interest in film and theater, he knows people who know where to get the best wigs. Not a fan of wigs? Don’t blame you, they’re hot after a while and can be super uncomfy! Doesn’t matter, he reminds you of how perfect you are, how it’ll grow back on day, and that he would shave himself bald and give you his own hair if you wanted it (this is when you say you’d prefer Sam’s, and Josh gets lost in the idea of shaving Sam’s luscious locks and the chaos that would ensue if he woke up without them). On a beautiful fall day, you were feeling a little down, and Josh makes you dress up, and go into the backyard, and he has a camera, and he makes you pose for photos. You want to roll your eyes and try and make excuses, but he doesn’t relent. He poses you himself in the sunlight and takes photo after photo. The afternoon is spent that way, and when you go back inside to warm up a bit, he shows you a few of them. You’re surprised to see just how amazing you look. Your smile is gleaming, your eyes bright and shimmering. Josh reminds you that your beauty is truly from the inside, and it didn’t leave just because your hair has.

And don’t even get me started on the fact that if Josh cares this much about you, his brothers and family do too. Karen is texting you every few days, asking how you’re doing and if you need a mama to come visit and help you. Jake is on FaceTime with Josh, walking him through recipes while Josh is toiling away in the kitchen. He’s making so much food, you don’t know how you’re gonna eat it all, but he’s for tons of Tupperware at the ready to portion and freeze meals so all you have to do is reheat them. Danny sends you beanies from every golf course he visits (you lose most of your heat through your head!) and Sam brings Rosie over for snuggles and naps, almost always when you’ve had an especially rough time. You and Rosie doze on the couch while he and Josh clean and organize your home for you, making sure nothing falls behind and you don’t have to lift a finger.

My love, please know you have my whole heart with everything you’re going through. I hope my silly little fics can bring you some happiness and joy during these tough times, and please know of you ever, ever need one, I’m here. I’ll write you any silly little thing you want if it makes your journey easier 💖

[brelione]

Action Figures (Rafe,Kelce,Topper X Reader)

Warnings:Mentions of bulimia,cringy,kind of bad.

Takes place a few days after this

Series Masterlist

When you texted the group chat saying that you needed to go to Walmart,asking if anyone wanted to go with you your phone rang.Rafe had called you on Facetime,telling you that he was on his way with Topper and Kelce from the golf course. “HEY HOE!”Kelce shouted,trying to see you from behind Rafe.Rafe rolled his eyes as Kelce took his phone,getting into the truck. “Why do you have to go to Walmart?”Kelce asked,still holding Rafe’s phone. “Chocolate chips,hot sauce and nutella for toast.”You answered,sliding on your shoes.Kelce frowned,leaning closer to the phone. “Why cant I see your face?”He asked.

You rolled your eyes,glancing at the screen. “Because I don't like my face.”You answered.He pouted,eyebrows furrowed. “But I like your face-this is face time!You can see me and I cant see you and this is bullshit.”He grumbled.You lifted your phone so he could see your face,a lazy grin spreading across your features.He was quick to screen shot,giggling. “I hate you.”You mumbled before hanging up. “Give me my phone back!”Rafe exclaimed,reaching into the backseat and holding out his hand.You pulled on Rafe’s yellow shirt that he had left at your house,trying the excess fabric into a knot.

You heard a beep,jogging down your stairs,grabbing your mini back pack and putting your phone in your pocket before walking out of the house and locking your door.Topper got out of the front seat,keeping the truck door open for you.You grinned up at him,he blushed before closing the door for you. “Oof,your truck smells like weed.”You grumbled.Rafe chuckled,backing out of the driveway. “Sorry,sunshine.”He mumbled,rolling down the windows so you wouldn't have to smell the stench.

He gave you a second glance,smirking to himself when he saw what you were wearing. “Thats my shirt.”He spoke,poking at the fabric.You nodded,humming as you took out your phone.Kelce kept poking the back of your neck from the backseat until you turned around to look at him. “Can I help you?”You asked.He reached out his finger,poking the tip of your nose.You swatted his hand away,flicking his forehead. “Hi.”You grinned.He chuckled,messing up your hair.You hooked up your phone to the radio,playing the descendants two soundtrack. 

“Play the third one!”Kelce exclaimed.You laughed,sliding down in your seat so he couldn't poke you again.When Rafe pulled into the Walmart parking lot the four of you got out,Rafe somehow managing to get you on his back.You held onto his shoulders as he jogged into the store,Topper grabbing a cart.You and Rafe went to the snack isle while Kelce and Topper went to go look at the movies.Things had been awkward between you and Topper since Saturday afternoon in the guest room.You tried to ignore the strange feeling from within you whenever you looked at him.

Rafe had his hand on your shoulder almost like a leash so he wouldn't lose you.Unfortunately nothing that you needed was in that isle,moving on to the one next to it.Rafe grabbed a jar of nutella and a loaf of bread when he saw it,making sure it was the type of bread you liked before tucking it under his arm.He held them both as you hunted for chocolate chips in the baking isle.Kelce sprinted past the isle,giggling to himself but turning around when he realised he had went past you.He grinned,standing in front of you and holding something behind his back. “What?”You asked.He grinned,holding out a Captain America action figure. “I know its not Bucky but its close enough-come to the toy isle with me!”He exclaimed,starting to jog but stopping when he noticed that you were simply walking.He grumbled something before throwing you over his shoulder and carrying you to the toy section.He put you down in front of the shelves of avengers action figures,legos and toy weapons.

He watched as your eyes scanned over the toys,your hand reaching out to smack his arm in excitement as you grabbed a plastic box that contained the one and only Spider Gwen. “Look-they have Spider Gwen!”You exclaimed,holding up the action figure.He grinned at your excitement,not knowing who you were talking about but glad it made you so happy. “Oh wait,you haven't seen Spider Verse….its fine we’ll just watch it later.”You spoke quickly,still looking at all the toys.Your phone dinged,making you take it from your pocket to check the notification.Rafe had texted you,asking where you were and if you had all left without him.

Isle 14 looking at action figur3s

You heard the loud slap of sneakers against tile,Rafe coming into view with bread,nutella and a bag of chocolate chips in his hand. “I found them.”he grinned,shaking the bag. “Did bottom die?”You asked,remembering the blonde.You looked back down at your phone,scrolling through to find Bitchy Bottom Ass Ho.You typed,asking where he was.

Im literally in the isle next to u tf

You giggled,going to find the boy.He was holding a few boxes of cake mix along with a pillow pet under his arm. “Loser.”You nodded. “Hoe.”He grinned,following you to the other isle with Rafe and Kelce. “We got everything?”Rafe asked.Kelce shook his head. “No,no I gotta go look at socks.”He answered,tossing a few action figures into the cart that Topper had stolen from them.You decided to go with Kelce,not sure what Topper and Rafe were doing. “Why do you need socks?”You asked,slipping under his arm.He smiled,biting his lip. 

“I wanna see if they have any disney socks.”He answered.You tugged at his arm,dragging him to the women’s section. “Our shirts might fuckin suck and the jeans might make everyone insecure because of terrible sizing but us ladies do have some brilliant socks.”You smiled,showing him the shelf of socks.He smiled,looking at all of them. “Wait-are those ariel socks?”he asked.You handed him the largest pair,watching him get excited. “Oh hell yeah,they don't have Olaf socks though.”He sighed. “Yeah,but Amazon does.”You grabbed a pair of Winnie The Pooh socks for yourself,looking for any marvel socks. 

“Can we watch Frozen later?”He asked,grabbing your hand again just because he enjoyed the feeling.You nodded,asking if he wanted to go to the book isle with you.He said yes,of course.He would take any chance to hang out with you alone.He could never let that slip to the boys,though.He didn't want to cause conflict in the group,he knew about Rafe’s pretty obvious crush on you and knew better than to turn things into a love triangle.He had seen plenty of movies to know how that would end.You felt strong arms lock around your waist,scaring you.You looked up,seeing Topper with a grin on his face. “And you did this for why?”You asked,the boy kissing your forehead and letting you go.The four of you went to self check out,Rafe deciding to buy like ten packs of gum.A worker checked your receipt,trying to ignore the fact that a group of grown men and an adult woman had just purchased action figures and disney socks.

You ended up in the backseat with Topper,showing him the Spider Gwen action figure. “Swear to god she’s like the baddest bitch ever and I love her so much.”You grinned,taking a picture of the box.Kelce leaned on the arm rest,looking back at you. “I thought that was Natasha?”He grinned.You sighed,putting the action figure away. “There can be multiple baddest bitches.”You told him before asking for the aux cord so you could play The Little Mermaid soundtrack. “After this can you play Lion King?”Topper asked.You smiled,biting your lip. “Yeah,ok,Taka.”You giggled.His face dropped,glaring over at you.He stuck his tongue out,whining.

Rafe chuckled. “You kids behave back there or im taking away your disney movies.”He smirked.You leaned forward,fighting against your seatbelt so you could lean your elbows on the arm wrest. “Rafe,why are you so bad at driving?”You asked.He scoffed,putting his elbow on top of your head as he turned around a corner. “Oh,as if you didn't run over a traffic cone.”He huffed.You pulled his arm away,biting his skin lightly. “Did you just bite me?”He asked.You grinned as he pulled over,unbuckling his seatbelt and turning to look at you. “(Y/N),I will make you get out of my truck.Don't test me.”He spoke sternly,trying not to grin. “Do it,bitch.”You smirked.

He looked outside the window,checking to see if anyone was around before getting out of the truck and opening the door to the backseat.He reached across you lap,unclicking your seatbelt.Topper grabbed your thigh,trying to help you but it wasn't helpful seeing as though Rafe had his arms around your waist,dragging you out of the truck.Topper was laughing,video recording. “Im a good driver-I swear I am.Im gonna drive you to insanity.”Rafe chuckled,poking you repeatedly and holding you to his chest.You tried walking backwards,eventually getting him to stumble.You took the chance to get him on the ground completely,sitting on top of his chest. “YOU HAVE BEEN DEFEATED!”You exclaimed,smacking his shoulder lightly.He smirked before rolling himself over,knocking you into the grass with his knees on either side of your hips. “Yeah?Im defeated?Am I really?”He smiled.

You glared up at him,sliding out from under him. “Yeah.”You answered,standing up and holding out your hand to him.He declined the offer,standing up and trying to brush the dirt off of his expensive pants.You sighed,getting back in the truck to see Kelce looking at you with a goofy grin. “You know what,Kelce?Shut up.”You flicked the tip of his nose.He bit his lip,chuckling before turning back around.Topper rolled his eyes,looking at his phone and texting someone.Your eyebrows furrowed at his expression,scooting across the leather seat to see what he was doing but he pulled his phone to his chest.

 “What’s going on with you,Top?”You asked.He put his phone in his shirt pocket,looking away from you. “Nothing,(Y/N).”He answered.You huffed,moving back to your seat as Rafe began to drive again. “Can we get McDonalds?”Kelce asked.Rafe ignored him,still driving.You pouted,leaning forward. “Rafe?”You called out to him.He raised his eyebrows,looking up at you from the mirror so you knew he was listening. “Can we get McDonalds?”You asked.He nodded,turning down a different street opposed to the one that would lead directly to yours.Kelce rolled his eyes,glancing over at you and raising your eyebrows.

You leaned back in your seat,suddenly feeling kind of nauseous.This would happen every once in a while when you would forget to take your vitamins,sometimes you were too lazy to take the handful of pills and would instead just hold an icepack to the back of your neck for a while until you felt okay again.You must've looked like shit,Topper reaching a hand across to feel your forehead. “Are you feeling sick?”He whispered to you,his demeanor changing as he moved your hair off your shoulders,rubbing your back lightly. “Im fine,just forgot to take my vitamins.”You answered,enjoying his touch.It was helping with the nausea,you didn't really know why.Topper frowned,his hand moving back to your head and rubbing your scalp lightly.

 “When was the last time you ate?”He asked.You shrugged,breathing through your nose and humming quietly because you had learned that if you hummed for long enough you wouldnt vomit. “Rafe,can you hurry up please?”Topper sounded anxious.You didnt know why he was acting so dramatic,he had seen you much worse before. “Why?What’s going on back there?”Rafe asked,now sounding just as anxious as Topper. “She forgot to take her vitamins,not looking too good.”Topper said quickly,urging the tall boy to drive faster.

You sighed,eyes still closed. “Im fine,guys.”You grumbled,feeling their glares. “What about breakfast?”Kelce asked.You imagined that he looked like an angry,concerned grandfather.You shook your head,making him frown. “How many times have I told you that i’ll come over to make you breakfast when you don't feel like it?Gosh,dammit.”He sighed.You felt the truck swerve slightly,Rafe rolling his window down and asking you what you wanted.You just shrugged,not wanting to accidentally vomit. “Get her a burger for iron...maybe two,fries,apple slices.Just order her a cheeseburger happy meal and a McFlurry.”Kelce told him quickly.

You weren't paying attention but heard the sound of a paper bag crumpling,being passe into the back seat along with a red happy meal box.Topper took his hand away from your head,pressing the side of a cold McFlurry cup to it instead.You took it from him,holding the cold cup between your thighs and looking down at the vanilla icecream that was changing colors from the obnoxious amount of m and ms.Topper opened the happy meal box,checking to make sure they got everything right.He peeled back the yellow paper that protected the burger,handing it to you.

You sighed softly,raising the sandwich to your mouth with slightly shaking hands.After a couple of bites you already felt better,finishing it when Rafe pulled into your driveway.The doors opened,you unbuckled your seatbelt and Kelce insisted on carrying you on his back.He put the pin into the key pad,knowing the combination for emergencies.He set you down in the living room,letting you sit on the couch.Rafe handed you your icecream,Topper giving you the Happy Meal box that now only contained a small box of fries,a small bag of apple slices and a toy for children.

Rafe set down all the Walmart bags,offering you the jar of nutella so you could dip your apple slices in the chocolatey goodness.Kelce handed you the TV remote so you could turn on the movie that you had told him about earlier. “Its animated?”He asked.You nodded,opening the nutella jar. “Yeah,it is.Its good though.”You answered,dipping an apple slice.Rafe noticed you hadnt touched your icecream before realizing he hadnt given you the spoon.The three boys had ordered sixteen cheeseburgers for themselves along with a ten piece chicken nugget and four orders of large fries. “Shit-fuck,you still need to take your vitamins.”Kelce got up and jogged to your kitchen,grabbing you the palm full of small pills,getting down on one knee and holding them out to you.

 “Your majesty.”You rolled your eyes,taking the pills and pouring them into your mouth,swallowing them dry.Rafe shook his head in disapproval,handing you his mountain dew.You took a couple of sips until the lump in your throat had been washed down,handing the cup back to him.You only got through half of your fries before you felt full,putting the box down on the table and seeing the melting rainbow monstrosity of icecream. “Does anyone want this?”You asked,holding up the icecream. “You do.”Topper answered,biting into another cheeseburger and getting mustard on the side of his mouth.You gave him a dirty look,putting the cup down.Kelce put his arm around you,going to whisper in your ear. “Are you full or are you just stressed about the icecream?”He asked.

You shrugged,watching as his hand traced figure eights along your kneecap. “Okay,well try to get like halfway through,can you do that?”He asked.You nodded,grabbing the cup again.Kelce lifted his arm up so you could lean against his lap,his arm now resting on your stomach as the two of you watched the tv.You hadnt eaten icecream since sophomore year and everytime you had eaten it it would come back up and into your toilet right after.You missed it though,maybe Kelce knew that and thats why he had ordered it for you.You got some of the colorful dessert on your spoon,letting it melt in your mouth.

Out of the corner of your eye you could see the big grins on Rafe and Topper’s faces,proud of you. “That guy doesnt look like Tom Holland.”Topper pointed to the OG Peter Parker of the Spiderverse universe. “Ok,well neither do you.”Kelce fought back.Rafe grinned. “I mean,I kinda look like him.”He shrugged.You shook your head,your spoon hanging from your mouth. “Bullshit-SHUT UP!MILES IS COMING UP!”You exclaimed as Sunflower started playing.Rafe smiled at your excitement,unwrapping another burger. “Where’s the blonde girl?Uh...Spider Gwen?”Kelce asked.You flicked his chest,rolling your eyes. “It just started,just wait.”You answered.As Miles walked into class,sitting next to Gwen you ggigled. “THERE SHE IS!THERES MY QUEEN!”You exclaimed,pointing to her.

@sexytholland @28cnn  @popcrone818 @fttayla @cherryobx @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @drewstarkeyobx @poguestyleskye @judayyyw @jjtheangel @copper-boom 

@sunwardsss @outerbongs  @httpstarkey  @teenwaywardasgardian  @imagines-07​  

If you’d like to be tagged in all future JJ imagines/headcannons/series comment with a heart,if you’d like to be tagged in all future Pope imagines/headcannons/series comment with a smiling face,if you’d like to be tagged in all future Rafe imagines/headcannons/series comment with a frowning face,if you’d like to be tagged in all future Kiara imagines/headcannons/series comment with a question mark and if you’d like to be tagged in all future Sarah Cameron imagines/headcannons/series comment with a plus sign.Or if thats too complicated you can just comment whose name you’d like to be tagged in.

[jimmydemaret]

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Sticky Stuff

Big house, big car, back seat, full bar, Houseboat won't float,......

It'll hang you up dealing with too much stuff

Delbert McClinton - "Too Much Stuff"

My oldest grandson is a couple of months shy of 18 and will soon graduate from High School.

He just celebrated a full year of employment as a Walmart Mobility Cart Engineer. And as part of his carefully mapped out career path, he also just completed advanced training as a Cash Register Technologist - Junior Grade.

Which means he is all grown up now and beginning the long slow glide on the flight path to stress, boredom, anger, resentment, regret, retirement and death.

Congratulations are in order! Great job Eddie! Good work! Well done! Now shut up, step up over there to your position inside The Machine and start pushing buttons and pulling levers with the rest of us.

And so I guess this means it is long past time for us to sit down and have - Dot Dot Dot Daaa - 'The Talk'.

Yep, it's time for me to explain to him the most common problem we all have as we move through life - the accumulation of 'Sticky Stuff'.

Do you remember what it was like growing up in a small town in the Deep South in the 50's? No? Sorry about that. Sucks to be you I guess. Blame your parents, not me.

As kids, whenever we ran around in the fields or woods, we would invariably get back home with about 300,000 cockle burs stuck to our socks, shirts, Levi's and Vern's yellow dog.

To wit:

Almost impossible to pick off.

Which brings me to all those things that we pick up during our lives. Things that stick to us just like those cockle burs. And, sooner or later are just as annoying.

Scientists who specialize in stuff - categorize them into three main groups:

Stuff we need and acquire and use and later on don't use any more.

Stuff we acquire thinking we will use and then years on realize we never did use them and forgot we had them.

Stuff we acquire that we have no use for, never will have a use for and years on - are still stuck to us like giant cockle burs.

"You there - in the back- with your stupid hand up?"

"Yeah, yeah I know. There ARE subgroups of stuff - like that thing we acquired, got broked, intended to fix but never did and it's still there in the kitchen drawer."

"But let's keep to my main point here, OK?"

(I'm not sure how to continue with this discussion without angering my wife, but I guess I'll just soldier on and hope her Email Spam Filter is working.)

Wait! I know! I will only mention my stuff. "That's right dear, none of this applies to you."

I've got tools in my garage I've forgotten how to use. Some of my electrical tools may not even fit today's outlets - I'm not sure and I'm afraid to plug them in.

I've got camping gear and fishing gear and golfing gear.

These days my idea of camping means staying at a motel without a continental breakfast.

There are 20 or 30 generations of salmon and trout that owe their lives to my unused, dusty fishing gear in the corner of my garage.

I haven't golfed in years (The good news is that if I were to go golfing this weekend, I would probably be just as skilled as I ever was!)

There's a thing hanging on my garage wall that looks like a bicycle. I'll check that out this weekend.

I've got a small hand cranked device for making homemade cigarettes. Go ahead, ask me how many times I've used that.

Years ago at the Scottish Highland Games, I paid way too much for a replica Scottish Broad Sword that it is still in the closet where I carefully placed it.

I'm not sure why I thought I needed a Scottish Broad Sword. Maybe if my gun jams during a break-in?

The only thing I remember for sure is that the purchase involved warm beer on a hot summer day.

So now I keep wondering how to dispose of all this sticky stuff.

Short of burning down my house or just disappearing and leaving it all behind, there aren't a lot of options.

I'm thinking I can give some of them to my kids right now and snicker as they drive home to put them in places of high honor in the corner of their garage.

(I can already hear the conversation when they get home. "I can see that it's broken honey, but this was Pops favorite jackhammer!")

Or, I could wait until after and look down from heaven (or up, if I follow my wife's directions) and snicker as my offspring sit in the midst of the whole humongous jumbly pile and mumble things like:

"Why did he save all this junk?" and

"Cripes sake, what did he ever use this for?" and

"WTF" I never even knew he owned this piece of crap!" and finally,

"We're gonna need more beer and a bigger dumpster."

[melancholysurveys]

#2

What day is today? Tuesday.

What did you do last night?  I went to a mini golf place with my mum and for a few drinks. We went away for the night.

Do you sleep with a night light?  No, I prefer as little light as possible when sleeping.

What did you do on New Years Eve?  I had a takeaway with my parents and a few drinks inside but I didn’t feel like celebrating. I actually entered the New Year crying. I didn’t want to process that I would be entering 2022 and my best friend is still forever in 2021. It’s still so difficult to digest. 

If you had to play one sport, what would it be?  I wouldn’t like to do any competitive sport.

If your car broke down, which one of your friends would pick you up?  I don’t drive but I’d probably just get a lift from my brother.

Where did you last go to eat and when?  Today. Me and mum called at Wetherspoons for some food before our train home. 

Have you ate a lot today?  Yes.

Who is the worst person in your life?  I’d say myself at the moment.

Do you wear green on St. Patrick’s Day?  No.

What jewellery are you wearing?  Just some standard earrings and my nose ring. Nothing fancy.

What is something you would never get rid of?  I can’t ever get rid of the rose bear Jess got me. 

Is your hair up or down?  Up.

What is your favourite cereal?  I change it depending on mood but can’t go wrong with shreddies.

What room are you in?  My own.

What are your favourite colours?  Right now it’s sunset colours.

Walmart, kmart, target? Target.

What is your favourite place to get pizza?  Chain is Pizza Hut but I love this local takeaway place near me. 

Do you use listerine?  No.

What is your favourite cartoon?  Fairly Odd Parents.

Do you like the colour yellow? Yes.

Do you have a plaid shirt?  Yes

What is your favourite animal?  Dogs and dolphins

Do you wear your significant other’s clothes?  I’m not in a relationship.

What colour are your toenails? Toe nail colour.

What is your favourite kind of potato chip?  Thai sweet chilli sensations.

What is the worst feeling in the world?  Not sure if it’s a feeling or more so an experience that I’ll be enduring for the rest of my life but grief. It’s consuming and so incredibly isolating. I also think regret but that may be stemming from the grief and knowing it’s too late to say the things I should have said and done the things I should have done. 

Green or blue eyes?  I have blue eyes so I’m biased

Who are your favourite bands?  Architects and Boston Manor

When did you last go out of state?  I don’t live in states but I last went out of my specific region today. I last went out of the country though in 2020.

One word to describe your mood?  Exhausted