#going to college for creative writing is when they put a bunch of alcoholics in the same building together to 10x speed up this process

[shemarmooresfedora]

Rebuilding Family

Summary: Y/N and Spencer were college sweethearts at Cal-Tech but once Spencer got accepted to the FBI Academy, he ended things deciding it was not fair to make Y/N wait for him. When they meet again years later, he discovers something unexpected.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warnings: brief mentions of alcohol consumption, allusions to sex

A/N: so you know how last chapter i said there was going to be like 4 chapters left…sorry i lied. as much as it pains me to admit since i’m so attached to this little family, i feel this story is coming to its natural end and i don’t want to drag it out (i may do one-shots of this series in the future though!) that being said, this is the second to last chapter. i appreciate all of your continued support throughout this series <3

Masterlist

Chapter 36

You opened the front door to the house after your therapy appointment. You had been making a lot of progress.

Spencer and the kids used to go with you and then wait at the park across the street until you were done but you had decided that this time you could go alone. Spencer hugged you tightly before you left and said how proud of you he was, reminding you of your calming exercises for the waiting room, and to call him if you got too overwhelmed. Luckily, your anxiety had not gotten the better of you and your appointment went fine.

You could hear the opening notes to Golden by Harry Styles playing. Once the beat dropped, you heard Spencer say, “Okay, go babies, go!”

You rounded the corner to see Spencer conducting a dance party for the twins in their bouncy jumpers and Jo who was wearing her Rapunzel dress.

“Ollie,” Spencer crouched down to the rather stationary baby, “Look at your sisters! See, copy them! We’ll all bounce.”

While Ophelia was very audible and energetic, Ollie was more reserved. This concerned you and Spencer a bit because he would hardly cry and you had no idea what was going on with him or if he needed anything.

As Spencer backed up to start dancing as well, you pulled out your phone and hit record just in time to see Spencer accidentally bounce into the couch and trip and fall flat on his face.

Ollie giggled. Spencer shot up from the ground. Ollie had never done that before. Ophelia’s first laugh was a few weeks ago but nothing seemed to be funny enough for Ollie until his Daddy fell.

Spencer scrambled to get his phone, “Jo, can you record for Mommy? I’m going to fall again.”

You decided this was the time to make your presence known.

“That won’t be necessary,” you announced with a smile, ending the video you took.

“You heard?” Spencer beamed.

“Yep, got it on video too,” you walked over to the jumpers and lifted up Ollie, giving him a bunch of kisses, “You were really going to hurt yourself again just so I could have a video of our son laughing?”

“Absolutely, I was,” he grinned.

“You’re an idiot,” you chuckled.

“You’re the one who fell in love with an idiot,” he replied.

“I guess that makes us both idiots then,” you sighed happily.

“But idiots in love,” he kissed you.

You blew a raspberry and tickled Ollie’s little belly and he started giggling hysterically again.

-

Spencer was with twins on the floor on a blanket doing some ‘tummy time’ while Jo sat on the couch watching cartoons.

“Why can’t me and the babies come with you and Mommy for dinner like we usually do?” Jo asked.

“Because a year ago today, Mommy and I got married so we want to go out to a fancy restaurant and celebrate our love for each other. But, we’ll go out together as a family soon again and Uncle Derek and Auntie Penelope will be watching you tonight.”

“Okay,” Jo instantly agreed.

You clicked down the stairs in your high heels, carefully holding the railing. Spencer stood to help and offered his hand to you for support.

You were dressed in a midi A-line black corset dress with a white floral design.

“You look absolutely stunning as usual, my love,” he kissed your hand.

“As do you, my husband of officially a year,” you beamed.

He kissed you on the lips this time as the door opened.

“Kids night!” Penelope exclaimed, running into the house with Derek in tow. “I brought board games, ice cream, and every Disney movie DVD I own.”

“Auntie Penelope!” Jo hugged her and then Derek.

Then, Penelope turned to you both, “What are you guys still doing here?”

“Emergency numbers are on the fridge. We’ll both have our phones on the whole time,” you repeated the information you had told them many times before as you were pushed out the door by Penelope.

“Oh, also recent development!” Spencer added as he tried to resist Derek’s pushing, “The twins are avid crawlers now so if you set them down for a second and look away, they’ll be gone.”

“Good to know. Enjoy your night, you two,” Derek winked as he shut the door.

“So where are we going?” you asked as you walked hand and hand to the car.

Spencer opened the passenger side door for you, “We are going to the restaurant where we had our first date, my dear,” he smiled.

-

Spencer had rented a private patio for the two of you with lit candles, fairy lights, and a bouquet of wildflowers similar to the one you carried down the aisle a year ago.

You gasped when you saw the set-up, “I love you so much, Spencer Reid.”

“I love you more, Mrs. Reid.”

You and Spencer ordered the exact same dishes that you got on your first date for maximum nostalgia.

“There is something I wanted to talk to you about,” Spencer spoke mid-meal.

You set your fork down to show him he had your full attention.

“So I was thinking about what I want to do this summer. You’re off of work for the summer so we’ll both be home with the kids. I figured I should take up some sort of project to keep my mind stimulated,” he explained.

“Go on...” you took a sip of your wine.

“I think I want to become an author,” he stated.

“I think that’s a wonderful idea. Any idea what genre?” you smiled softly.

“At first, I was thinking about something related to my time at the BAU but then I realized I’ve had enough of that as is and I don’t feel like reliving it. Now, I’m thinking more along the lines of fiction because during all my years of schooling, I never really got to explore my creative side. I think a kid’s book could be fun for me to write. And I could work on it whenever the kids were napping or at school,” he explained to you.

“Whatever makes you happy, love. I can’t wait to read what that beautiful brain of yours comes up with,” you grinned, “This also makes my gift for you even better.”

“Y/N, we agreed no gifts,” he rolled his eyes playfully.

“It’s just something small that made me think of you,” you pouted, reaching into your purse.

You handed him something wrapped in a thin layer of pale purple tissue paper. Inside was a beautiful leather journal. It had a quote inscribed on it.

‘Do not be afraid; our fate cannot be taken away from us; it is a gift’ -Dante Alighieri

“You just saw this and happened to think of me?” he asked, amused, “How is it customized with our initials and wedding date then?”

“Fine,” you relented, “I ordered it off Etsy a while ago.”

“Good thing I also didn’t listen to our agreement,” he smirked, “But mine isn’t as sentimental and it’s really a gift for us both.”

“I’ll love it just the same,” you assured him.

“We are not going home tonight. The fairy godmother volunteered her and Derek’s services all night so I booked us a room at a bed and breakfast and I already packed you a bag in the backseat of the car.”

You started stuffing pasta into your mouth, “Eat faster. I want to go as soon as possible.”

Spencer chuckled at your eagerness.

-

Spencer felt you trying to sneak out of bed to get your phone.

“What are you doing?” he mumbled at the loss of your warmth.

“I just want to check on the kids. This is our first night away from the twins,” you grabbed your phone, putting on Spencer’s button up, and facetiming Penelope.

She picked up on the second ring, “Hello, my lovely.”

“Hey, Pen. Are the kids behaving for you guys?”

“Yes. They’re all sleeping soundly now. Me and Derek are just binging episodes of The Bachelorette now.”

“That’s great to hear. No spoilers though!”

“How is your night going?” she inquired.

“It’s good, it’s good. Dinner was nice. The hotel is nice,” you tried to avoid the obvious.

“Y/N, your makeup is completely smudged and I can see the collar of Spencer’s shirt around your neck,” she replied.

You heard Derek laughing in the background, “Proud of you, lover boy.”

“Okay, we’ll see you in the morning,” Spencer hung up the phone for you.

“What did you do that for?”

“Round 2,” he smirked.

taglist (just ask to be added or removed!): @samuel-de-champagne-problems @g0lden-cth @spencerreid9 @averyhotchner @coldlilheart @k-k0129 @ickleronniekinsemotionalrange @harrystylesandthegoobs @cmily @jswessie187 @rem-ariiana @hoodpankow @mochionly @spencerreid-187 @doctorreiding @reidsfish

[katrinawritesthings]

Jonghyun / Taemin; bridging parallels ; nc17

jonghyun and taemin live in the apartments across from each other and jonghyun has been watching taemin climb out of his window and sneak out of the house several times a week for years ever since they were both in high school

for summer of shinee 2021 : )

Him and Taemin text still. Not often, and when they do, it's never really a full conversation. Mostly just memes shared at 2 in the morning, small talk, happy birthdays. Look at that dog texted fervently at 7 p.m. On a Thursday dragging one of them at light speed to their window to obey. Taemin makes his way into one of Jonghyun's articles again, this time a little spotlight of his work as a choreographer for an entire show.

Jonghyun has known Taemin since they were kids. Apartment neighbors, kind of. Jonghyun is 408, Taemin is 718. The way the apartments are set up, Jonghyun can sit at his bedroom window, look outside, and see Taemin's bedroom window across the way and one floor down. They go to elementary school together, then middle school, and then high school. They have one or two classes together over the years. None of that really matters because they never really talk.

What was the homework texted here, our mutual friend both invited us to the same party there, look at that dog shouted into the space between their windows at 7 p.m. On a Thursday one time in 8th grade. Whatever.

Even when Taemin starts sneaking out at night, the summer after sophomore year, 15 years old, it doesn't magically make them have a speaking relationship. All it does is distract Jonghyun as he's sitting at his window sill, scented candle lit, summer reading program report under his hands. Distracts him and makes him drop his pencil four floors into the bushes that line the building.

He doesn't watch it long enough to see it hit the ground. He's far too interested in watching whatever the fuck Taemin thinks he's doing. He's clambering out of his window, his third-story window, nothing but a concrete drop below him, and then he's actually climbing up, up the wall, up the building, up three floors until he's hauling himself up onto the roof.

When Taemin makes it up there, he rolls out of view over the ledge, but then his head pops back over. He looks all the way down, and even from far away, Jonghyun can see the huge smile spread over his face. His hands slap excitedly on the ledge before he stands up, turns, and disappears again as he jogs away, the high kick of his ankle behind him as he stumbles a step the last thing that Jonghyun sees of him.

Until he sees him sneaking out again the next night.

It doesn't become a nightly thing, but it is still regular enough that, every night when he's at his window sill with a candle and some writing, he’ll glance up at any movement he sees across the way just in case. It doesn't stop when school starts back up again, either. Sometimes Jonghyun will watch Taemin clamber out of his window, up the building, and disappear on the roof one night and then watch him sleeping on the bus the next morning, wondering how many hours he actually got. Sometimes he'll be up late enough to watch Taemin sneak back in, a descent three floors down from the roof that stops Jonghyun's heart every time.

School goes on. Jonghyun takes storytelling electives; music, ceramics, creative writing, art. He reads comic books, watches anime, looks up walkthroughs of video games that he can't play himself. He gets detention one time for being late and a kid sitting next to him offers him some weed, which he tries but doesn't really like, but that kid helps him through some spontaneous crying a few weeks later so they become pretty close and he winds up being the designated driver to a bunch of stoners. His dad moves out, his sister moves out, his sister moves back in. He picks up a part-time job at a music store during his senior year to help with the bills.

He sees Taemin around every now and again. They have ceramics together, for one. Taemin sits at another table with his own group of friends, but he smiles and says hey to Jonghyun when they wind up in the glazing room together. He comes into Jonghyun's job sometimes, looking over new album releases and buying everything a particular band puts out.

Jonghyun sees Taemin dancing during school pep rallies, assemblies, during rehearsals and the big night for a talent show they're both in where Jonghyun almost cries on stage because he's so nervous to be playing one of his own self written songs in front of people. He cries backstage instead and they still don't talk, but Taemin offers him a quick hug as they pass, hand rubbing over his back, and then he's gone before Jonghyun even really realized he was there in the first place. Later that night, Taemin sneaks out and then back in again within an hour.

And that night is also the first night that Taemin notices Jonghyun watching him. It’s just as he’s putting his hands on his windowsill to hoist himself up that he hesitates and, for a reason that Jonghyun can't come up with, looks directly across the way at Jonghyun.

He jumps when he sees Jonghyun, like he's startled; Jonghyun waves, a little confused, a little amused. Taemin looks down, covering what has to be an embarrassed smile with his hand.then Taemin looks up, waves back, and clambers out of his window and up the wall like usual. After he reaches the top, he peeks his head over the edge for the first time since that first night. Jonghyun leans just a little bit out of his window to smile and wave again. Even with all of the distance between them, Jonghyun can see the flash of his smile as Taemin taps two fingers to his temple and flicks them off in a salute.

From that night on, everytime that Taemin sneaks out, they wave at each other.

They graduate; Jonghyun with okay grades and Taemin with probably the same. Jonghyun doesn't go to college or anything. He upgrades his job at the music store to full time and does some freelance work online writing articles about art events and festivals in the area while he tries to work on his own stories in his free time. Taemin doesn't leave town either, because he still climbs out of his window and disappears over the roof on a regular basis. It's not until Taemin comes into the music store one time to buy a new CD and Jonghyun recognizes the logo on his hoodie as belonging to the local dance theater that he figures out what Taemin has been up to lately.

And it's not until they happen to both wind up in the little corner store down the street from their apartment complex at the same time that they have their first real conversation.

Jonghyun is there because he wanted snacks and his sister wanted snacks and he lost the rock paper scissors to decide who would go out and get some. Taemin is apparently there to buy some booze because he's standing in front of all of the refrigerators and contemplating the selection when Jonghyun opens one next to him to grab a couple bottles of soda.

"Oh, sorry," Taemin says, glancing at him and stepping a little bit away, and then, brighter, "oh, hey Jonghyun."

"Hey," Jonghyun says back, pleasantly surprised to recognize him. "Party?" he asks, nodding at all of the liquor. Taemin shakes his head, tells Jonghyun that he's just looking for something fun and fruity to enjoy by himself in his room sometimes. For self-care, he says. Jonghyun tells him he gets that and taps the glass in front of one of his favorite fruity boozy drinks in recommendation. Taemin shrugs and takes his word, opening the refrigerator and pulling out the bottle without even really looking at the label or anything on it. Then, after a moment's hesitation, asks, "how old are you again?"

"20," Jonghyun tells him, smiling a little sheepishly. "Maybe I ask my sister to buy me alcohol. Don't tell anyone."

And Taemin's response to that is a snort, a broad grin, and a hand slipping into his back pocket and pulling out his wallet. "As long as you don't tell anyone about this," he says as he pulls out his ID card from its clear plastic flap, slots it in with all his other cards, pulls out a different ID card, and puts that in the flap.

The blunt casualness of that whole exchange surprises a laugh out of Jonghyun, one that sounds loud in the quiet little store. He doesn't try to stifle it; has never really tried to stifle his laughter. Still chuckling, he offers up his pinky to Taemin to promise. Taemin looks at him, looks at his pinky, covers his mouth and nose with the back of his hand for a moment, then links their pinkies together.

Taemin buys his alcohol and leaves the store before Jonghyun finishes picking up all of his snacks, but he sees Taemin ahead on the sidewalk on the way back and jogs to catch up with him.

"Don't go climbing out of your window after you drink any of that," he says, worried halfway through the sentence that maybe he's overstepping but finishing anyway. Taemin does that thing again, where he looks down and rubs his nose, and is the first one to offer up his pinky this time.

Taemin picks up a fashion for denim-on-denim, leather, spikes. Dark clothes, baggy hoodies, lots of rings. Beanies, worn-out shoes. Jonghyun attaches himself to big comfy sweaters, turtlenecks, bracelets cinching over the sleeves. Ripped jeans, snapbacks, boots. Taemin lets his hair grow out until it fans out around his face, soft and wavy, then cuts it short into a choppy bowl cut and a crisp undercut. Jonghyun tries out an undercut too, finds he likes it, experiments with dying his hair every couple of months. Taemin has some new piercings–shark bites, cheek studs, spikes through his ears. Jonghyun has some new tattoos–words on his arms, permanent bracelets around his wrists, planets on his side, a starscape on his back.

Jonghyun starts teaching guitar lessons at the music store to kids on the weekends. His mom gets promoted at her job. They stop struggling as much, settle into something almost resembling financial security. He keeps freelancing and in one of his articles he writes about a culture show the dance theater is putting on. In the picture that runs with the article, Taemin is standing on the end, smiling with his arm around a fellow dancer, doing a victory sign for the camera.

There's a queer club down the street from the music store that Jonghyun goes to sometimes. He makes new friends, has a couple of casual hookups, has a cute girlfriend for a while but things don't really work out. It's fine between them after. Taemin almost has a cute date friend one time, but that doesn't work out either. Jonghyun knows this because he watches the whole thing happen from his window sill.

He's there, writing notebook under his hands, scented candle next to his elbow, just like every night, and Taemin is suddenly there on the roof. Except, for once, he's not alone. Someone else is with him. A little taller, thick dark hair spilling out of a pulled up hoodie, and that's about all Jonghyun can see of them. The pair of them sit down on the ledge, feet dangling over nothing, close enough that their shoulders almost brush every so often.

Jonghyun doesn't mean to snoop, or eavesdrop, or anything. Taemin's love life is his own business. It's interesting, yeah, to watch them stargazing and talking together, but Jonghyun really is only glancing up at them every couple of minutes to distract his brain a little bit so he can focus on his writing without getting distracted a lot by something else. And it just so happens, that during one of those glances, Taemin tries to make his move.

It's not much of a move; a purposeful bump of their shoulders, a rub of his nose with the back of his hand, something said to make them look at him directly. More quiet words, a leaning in–not all the way, but enough to be clear–a tilt of his head like he's asking a question, and then.

And then. The other person leaning back, shaking their head, covering their mouth with both hands. Quickly they reach for Taemin's hand, holding it tight as they speak earnestly, as Taemin nods up and down and tugs his hair at the back of his head where they can't see.

They sit together for a little while longer after that, but a barely perceptible distance apart now, enough space that they don't accidentally bump shoulders anymore. Then the other person stands up, starts to walk away. Taemin turns and takes their hand, carefully, asks them something that they nod in agreement to. Taemin drops their hand, flops his own hands into his lap. The other person walks away, and then a minute later, Taemin falls back, sprawls himself out over the roof until all Jonghyun can see are his legs still dangling. They kick in the air for a few seconds before flopping limply back down in defeat.

Jonghyun looks back to his writing with a shake of his head. Poor baby.

He doesn't see Taemin sneak out for a couple of weeks after that. Then, another night, another candle, another page of writing, he glances up and finds Taemin sitting at his window, arms crossed on the windowsill, face nestled in his elbow, cheek smushed up as he pouts out at nothing. Jonghyun can't help it; he smiles at the image.

"Hey sorry about your heartbreak dude" is what he texts to Taemin once he finds his number buried in all of his contacts, an entry probably put in during high school for some project that neither of them remember. And then he just watches, waits, until Taemin leans away from his window. A moment later, Taemin returns, and this time he's holding his phone and looking up at Jonghyun. Jonghyun waves with an apologetic little shrug.

"Damn you saw that??? " Taemin texts back. Jonghyun replies that he did indeed see it and offers more condolences. Taemin's sigh is audible to Jonghyun even from so far away, but he replies anyway. They talk about nothing, really; Taemin asks what Jonghyun is always writing about and Jonghyun tells him. His book that he's been working on for a while. The one where he wanted to write a love story but wound up accidentally writing a breakup scene in the first chapter and then just went with it. Taemin seems to take some comfort in hearing about a failed romance.

The night after that, Taemin climbs out of his window again.

Him and Taemin text still. Not often, and when they do, it's never really a full conversation. Mostly just memes shared at 2 in the morning, small talk, happy birthdays. Look at that dog texted fervently at 7 p.m. On a Thursday dragging one of them at light speed to their window to obey. Taemin makes his way into one of Jonghyun's articles again, this time a little spotlight of his work as a choreographer for an entire show.

Jonghyun's manager gets fired for tax evasion or some bullshit and suddenly he finds himself as the manager instead. Not because he's super qualified for the job, but because he's worked there for the longest, almost 11 years, and the rest of the employees are mostly part-time high school kids. All of a sudden he has all of these duties and responsibilities that he doesn't know what to do with, on top of dealing with the mess that his old boss left him with. The first thing he does is give himself and all of the employees a raise, which at first gets him a serious reprimand from upper management of the store chain, but he doesn't give a shit and the next month he gets praised for reducing customer service complaints and boosting product sales.

One night Taemin comes into the music store to buy a new album from his favorite band a couple weeks later than Jonghyun was expecting him to. Usually he shows up on day one; when Jonghyun mentions that to him, he rubs his nose with the back of his hand and shrugs, mumbling something about a giveaway online and shipping problems. Jonghyun chuckles at that, mentions that the cardboard stand that they have in the store to promote the album is free for him to take, if he wants it. He's the manager. He can do that now.

Taemin's eyes widen behind his bangs, his teeth flash in a huge smile. He thanks Jonghyun emphatically, grabs the stand, and walks out with it, holding it in front of him as he goes and biting his lip.

Jonghyun finds himself thinking about that later in bed. Taemin’s teeth biting into his bottom lip. Digging into soft, plush pink. He looked different today. Something about his face, his nose. A nose job, Jonghyun guesses, something to change the tip of his nose from a cute soft hook to a cute round end. He dropped his shark bite piercings at some point and replaced them with studs. two silver squares on each side of his bottom lip, matching the ones that dimple his cheeks, the sets that outline the tips of his eyebrows. Matching the ones lined up below his collar bones. Jonghyun could see those in the dip of his v-neck.

The piercings won't leave his mind as he tries to fall asleep. Heavy silver, bold, striking, a statement of toughness outlining his delicate features. Jonghyun wonders how they feel, if he ran his fingers over them would they be cold or would they have absorbed Taemin’s body heat. He makes the mistake of wondering if Taemin has matching studs on his hips and realizes with a start that he's running his fingers over his own lips, imagining how it would feel if he were to drag his mouth over them.

Face hot, lips tingling, Jonghyun rolls over in bed and tries to think of anything else.

It works. For a little bit. Until the next day when he waves at Taemin as he heads out for the night. Then he's thinking about them again. Then he's thinking about what kind of noises Taemin would make if Jonghyun kissed his piercings. About how much deeper, huskier Taemin's voice sounded in the store. It had to have been that deep the last time they talked, the last time Taemin came in to buy an album, but–if it was, Jonghyun doesn't remember noticing or caring as much as he does now.

This new realization has him trying with all his heart to think about himself, what it means that he's gone his whole life without knowing that he had a thing for piercings, what it means if it's not the piercings and it's just Taemin, what it means if he suddenly starts lusting over the boy next door.

This lasts for about two more days until he gets tired of it and decides to just do something about it.

So the next time he catches Taemin about to climb out of his window a little bit after midnight, he waves frantically to get his attention. Taemin stops, looks at him, smiles, waves back. Jonghyun beckons towards him, trying to communicate that he wants him to come over without shouting. Taemin points at himself then over up at Jonghyun, tilting his head; Jonghyun nods eagerly, beckoning again. Without a moment of hesitation this time, Taemin nods and holds up one finger.

He climbs up his building, and then instead of disappearing away from Jonghyun, he walks along the edge. Jonghyun leans a little bit out of his window to watch him all the way down to where the parallel lines of their apartment buildings turn into a U for him to cross, until he gets too close to Jonghyun's side to see anymore. Then, a minute later, there's a crunch of shoe against brick outside his window. He moves his tealight candle out of the way and Taemin slips into his room feet first.

"Hey," he says. "What's up? Can I smell?"

A finger with chipped black nail polish touches next to Jonghyun's tiny candle. He has studs on the backs of his wrists too. Jonghyun lets him smell with a warning to be careful not to spill it, and then tries to figure out a way to say what he wants to say tactfully. He didn't think this part through. It's not really his style to come up with detailed plans, just to try things out and see if they work. Finally, after a bunch of starts and stops, half asked questions, an exasperated sigh, he just says, "do you want to make out?"

And in the silence after the question, in the dim light of his desk lamp, Taemin's tongue wets his lips.

"Sure," he says.

Nice.

Sure turns into Taemin in Jonghyun's lap, turns into Jonghyun gliding his thumb over the studs under Taemin's lip, turns into Taemin cupping his face and pressing their mouths together. Kissing turns into Jonghyun's hands sliding up under his shirt, turns into Taemin groaning the hottest noise Jonghyun has ever heard into his mouth, turns into him standing with his sweater half way over his head frantically whispering to Taemin that his bed is too squeaky and his family is trying to sleep.

He takes Taemin to the floor, sits on his hips and grinds down while Taemin fumbles with his own belt buckle, hands bumping Jonghyun's cock through his pajama pants. Jonghyun hadn't meant for this to happen, wasn't planning on fucking Taemin, but he doesn't want to stop.Taemin doesn't either, says god no when Jonghyun asks and that's enough of a reason to Jonghyun to keep going. He's pushing Taemin's shirt up while Taemin is trying to reach up onto his bed for a pillow, and it's rushed and it's messy, but Jonghyun discovers that Taemin not only has studs along the V of his but also one over his belly button, bars through his nipples, and, best of all, when he pulls Taemin's pants down, four of us small silver balls like an X around the head of his cock.

Lube from his desk, three fingers deep into his own ass, thumb tracing over every piercing on Taemin's hips, so hard it hurts, almost delirious with want, Jonghyun barely hears Taemin when he says, "I've always thought you were cute."

The piercings in his collar bones glint in the light, his skin glistens with summer sweat, the sharp angle of his jawline, the shadow of his adam's apple bobbing in his throat, the raw edge on his voice as he says, "I've always liked you, ever since we were kids, I've always–I don't know when it turned into a crush, but I–god that feels so good. Oh my fucking god." Halfway down Taemin's cock, Taemin grabs Jonghyun's hips and pulls him down all the way, knocks the breath from his lungs. "Jonghyun," he says, "more."

Jonghyun gives him more until he can't anymore, until his thighs are burning and his arms are trembling. Taemin removes the effort for him by turning them around until he's on his back. Taemin fucks him like that, tries to kiss him more but quickly gives up and buries his face in Jonghyun's neck instead. With "you're perfect, you're perfect, you're so fucking perfect, " breathed under his ear, Jonghyun hooks his leg around Taemin's back, pulls him in harder, faster, whispers his own pleads back, begs Taemin to bite him, bite his neck.

Taemin bites him, hard, and that's how he comes, body frozen underneath him until he goes all the way limp, only barely registering in some faraway part of his brain Taemin's choked breaths and the warmth pooling inside of him. He's weak, hazy, loopy, giggling, and Taemin's gentle hands are on him again, picking him up, putting him on his knees, and Jonghyun is glad to obey, glad to do whatever the fuck when he's this blissed-out.

Quiet curses as hands smooth over his back, the softest "oh, wow," whispered as fingers trace his constellations, and then the deepest groan as Taemin's tongue touches his skin. Jonghyun's eyes fly open, his voice rises three octaves, he slaps both hands over his mouth to stifle the noises he's making, noises he’s never made before in his life. The moment that he realizes that Taemin has a tongue stud is the moment that everything goes white, and then the next moment, everything goes dark.

The next morning he wakes up alone, in his bed, pajama pants back on, candle burned all the way down to nothing, window closed. He's not angry, or hurt, but he is a little grumpy all day long until he walks up to the entrance of the apartment complex after work and Taemin is sitting on one of the big potted plants outside the door.

He stands up when Jonghyun gets close to him, presses a large jar candle of the scent from last night into his hands, and, blinking a mile a minute, blurts out, "hey, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for last night when I told you I was in love with you and then fucked you and then panicked and left," to which Jonghyun, baffled, wracking his memory, replies, "did you tell me you're in love with me?"

Which kicks Taemin's blinking into overdrive, starts up a long, stammering babble that Jonghyun can confidently say he understands about 20% of. After a minute he realizes that Taemin isn't going to stop, so he interrupts him by asking, "Taemin, do you want to go on a date?"

A few days later, they share a mountain of fries on an outside table at some burger joint. Taemin, embarrassed, reading notes from his phone, admits that he's had a crush on Jonghyun for what feels like forever but was always too shy and infatuated to make a move. Jonghyun, embarrassed, scratching the back of his head, admits that he just got suddenly horny for the piercings one day and was a little too impulsive in making his move. Both of them, laughing, agree that it would probably be nice to work towards a middle ground together.

And it is.

[liberty-barnes]

Tom being in love with your baby niece

Tom Holland x Female!Reader

Prompt: You meet Tom at a hospital and he’s immediately infatuated with the little girl in your lap (inspired by this video I found on tiktok)

Warnings: F L U F F, Tom being amazing with kids, mentions of alcoholic/drug addict mother, mentions of child abandonment, but overall fluff and feel good story

Word Count: 2379 words (this was supposed to be short but oh well)

Estimated Reading Time: 9 minutes

A/N: me, sweating profusely: calm down, just finish writing this, you are stronger than your baby fever, you are too young to have a child CALM TF DOWN

Masterlist

So, funny story, you met at the hospital

Tom had dislocated his shoulder while doing a backflip *dejected sigh*

And you were just trying to keep your baby niece calm while waiting for the nurse to come get you

You were sitting on the bed, Tom was right next to you, only a curtain separating you

But there was a tiny crack near the end from where it was pulled too far

And when you pressed Olivia closer to your chest, her head resting on your shoulder, she made eye contact with him

He saw her tear-filled eyes

(broke his heart)

So he started to make funny faces at her

Which made her start to giggle and coo and make grabby hands towards him

You turned around, visibly confused because hellooo she was just crying a second ago and now she’s???laughing???

And then you saw him

oh shit he’s hot

He smiled at you

You smiled back, cause what else are you supposed to do?

He got up and pushed the curtains back 

And sat on the chair instead

Still on his side of the curtain

But looking at you straight in the eye now

“So... what’s a pretty girl like you doing in a nasty place like this?”

Poor boy thought he was smooth

But he rested his weight on his injured arm

(that idiot) 

And it lead to him hissing in pain and cradling his shoulder with a pout while you laughed

“Fell down the stairs and twisted my ankle. You?”

“Dislocated my shoulder while doing a backflip.”

Meanwhile Liv was now resting on your lap

Looking at him with a smile on her face

And clapping while he smiled at made funny faces at her again

But then he noticed you were watching

And he was kinda making a fool of himself in front of you

(cue the blushing)

(so cute)

So you decided to help him out a little

"Thanks for putting her in a good mood again."

"No problem... is she yours?"

He didn't want to seem rude so he kept the judgment out of his voice, but you seemed a bit young to have a kid already.

"Nah, she's my niece"

"Oh, okay... Why'd you bring her to the hospital with you? It must be hard having to take care of a kid and get your ankle checked."

You looked a bit sad for a while.

"My sister left her with me as soon as I turned eighteen. My parents were never in the picture so it's been me and her for almost a year now."

"I'm sorry..."

"'S okay. Besides, at least I'm not alone all the time you now? I mean, it's hard to take care of a 13 month-old, but at least I know she won't grow up like I did... afraid... wondering if her mom was gonna come home drunk or half-dressed with another guy on her tail, wishing her sister would let her sleep on the bed instead of locking herself up with her boyfriend there."

He watched you smile as you looked down at the little girl in your arms that seemed to be a perfect reflection of you.

That was the moment he fell in love with you

Dark circles under your eyes and all

He got your number (yay!!) and had to work (read: pester you) for two weeks before you agreed to go out on a date with him.

Liv stayed with Harrison (after you checked that he was a good babysitter)

He took you to a nice little restaurant near the beach

They served giant burgers

Which you liked at lot

Conversation was easy 

He asked you what you were currently doing

"I'm working as a waitress in a little diner downtown."

He also found out you were doing online college to get your creative writing degree.

You told him about your family life. 

How your dad died in a car accident when you were three. 

How your mom was an alcoholic junkie and OD'd when you were fifteen.

How your nineteen-year-old sister had to take care of you for there on out. 

How she left soon after you graduated high school and left you with a three-month-old baby to take care of.

In turn, he told you all about his life

How he became an actor and got his big break as Spider-Man

He told you about his family and how much he misses them

How thankful he is to have Haz with him

You excused yourself to the bathroom just before dessert

And that bastard took advantage of that tiny window to pay the bill

You scolded him for that obviously

And tried to pay him back

He laughed and said no

Then he bought you a giant cotton candy

"Tom, seriously I can pay for my own stuff."

"I know but I like spoiling you."

You finished the cotton candy together while strolling down the beach

Then once it was done he threw out the cone and took your hand

The sun was just setting so it was like a picture-perfect moment

So he took advantage of that and kissed you

(so cliche)

You tasted like strawberry from your chapstick

The cotton candy you just had

You tasted like sweetness

And comfort

And home

You started dating officially not long after that

And that's when it all really started

You knew he was good with kids

That first day at the hospital told you as much

But you didn't expect him to be this good

Olivia was very much in love with him

They were practically glued at the hip

She constantly wanted hugs from him

He took her to the park and threw her up in the air while she squealed in delight

He picked her up and carried her while you were making dinner so she didn't feel left out

She sat on his back while he did push-ups

He'd kiss her nose every time he did a sit-up

They would have kissing contests

He kissed her cheek

She kissed his back 

Then he kissed hers again

And so on

Her first word was Tommy

You'd never seen him so happy

You, on the other hand, were not

"I raised you on my own ever since you were three months old and this is the thanks I get?"

They'd often fall asleep together on the couch

Your camera roll was full of photos of them sleeping

Her favorite thing to do was grab him by the sides of his head and kiss his curls

(a d o r a b l e)

He helped you plan the perfect birthday party for her

"Only the best for my best girl"

"I thought I was your best girl"

"Only the best for either of my best girls but in this case the youngest one"

She loved it

You're pretty sure he loved it more

But who can say for sure?

On your six month anniversary, he told you he loved you and that he had no plans on ever leaving you two.

He forced you to quit your job at the diner

"You're overworking yourself. I have more than enough money to take care of all of us and that way you'll be able to focus on your studies and travel with me since you do online college. Everybody wins."

So you went wherever he went

Including filming for Infinity War/Endgame

He took you to set one day

Everybody loved you

But as always, Olivia stole the show

They passed her around like a little doll

She loved the attention

It was quite funny seeing such a tiny baby being held by the mountain of a man that is Chris Hemsworth

She only referred to Chris Evans as 'Cap'

And Robert would forever be 'Tony'

But they didn't mind one single bit

"She just looks so cute when she says it, I can't be mad at her."

You met his family when the filming ended and he went back to London

Dom was ecstatic to finally have a little girl to take care of

"At least she laughs at my jokes, not like those idiots"

"You can leave her with us whenever you want"

Nikki was very happy to have one more girl in her corner

"I swear, if I hear one more second of golf talk, I'll go nuts"

Harry loved taking pictures of Liv

"She's just so photogenic, it's so easy"

You learned a lot of recipes from Sam

"Finally someone that won't wreck my kitchen and taint my food's good name"

Paddy liked playing with Liv and Tessa in the backyard

"It's nice to take care of someone for a change, I'm always the one being babied"

You made your relationship public while you were in London, a year and a half after you started dating

The public loved you

Because he just couldn't help but brag

And Tom with kids is the content the fans live for

tomhotland: omgggg they're so cuteee

spideysbae: the heart eyes thoooo

peterpprotectionsquad: i hereby declare that Olivia is the cutest baby to have ever existed and she must be protected at all costs

He took you to the Far From Home premiere

Your dress matched his suit

The fans went crazy

Olivia was living her best life in her little red and black dress

She'd gotten used to the flashes after Harry's numerous photoshoots

So she was just smiling and clapping a lot

The paparazzi loved her

The interviewers kept asking about you two

"(Y/N)'s the love of my life and Olivia's the sweetest baby I've ever known, I couldn't love her more if she was my own"

"So, do I hear wedding bells ringing?"

"Well, you never know"

That caught your attention for a second but you let it go in favor of posing with Liv after the paps all but begged you to

"Livvy say bye-bye"

She sent a kiss a said bye-bye in all her baby glory

They awed so much

His Instagram was filled with pictures of the three of you

Zendaya took a bunch of selfies with her as well

"Our dresses match, I have no choice"

She kept pretty quiet during the movie

But hugged Tom especially hard when she saw him cry on the big screen

The next morning, you were all over the headlines

"The sweetest little family in Hollywood"

On your third anniversary, he took you on a week-long trip to Bora Bora

Liv stayed with his parents

He took you on a walk to the beach

(déjà vu much?)

And proposed

Clumsily, but he proposed

How can a proposal be clumsy, you ask?

Well, he kneeled on a rock at first

"Ow! Fuck my knee, hold on a second"

Then he kept stuttering because he was so nervous

And in the end (after you said yes and he checked about five times cause "Wait seriously?") he started freaking out cause the ring didn't fit

But she wears the ring I used as a reference all the time!

"Um, Tom?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"The ring's supposed to go on my other hand..."

Ah, that explains it

The wedding was simple but beautiful

Livvy was the flower girl cause she wanted to throw petals in the air

Tessa brought the rings

His heart almost stopped when he saw you walk down the aisle

He was convinced you'd never looked more beautiful than that day at the premiere when your clothes matched 

But right now, looking at your smile and how gorgeous you looked in that dress, he realized he was wrong

He sniffled, trying to hold his tears, but Haz just handed him a tissue

"I came prepared"

You two adopted Liv

She was your daughter anyway, you just made it official

She started calling you 'mommy' and 'daddy'

"She called me 'daddy'."

Oh, the tears

To Tom's great delight, she started picking up a British accent, as she grew

It didn't help that she stayed at Nikki and Dom's all the time when you started teaching at a university in London

So they dialed they're British-ness up to eleven so she'd pick up on the accent

"Mummy, what's for pudding?"

Good Lord

After two years of trying, you found out Tom was unable to have kids

He cried a lot, and felt like he failed

You shut him up with a kiss and immediately mentioned adoption

"There are hundreds of children begging for a home and parents to love them."

You adopted an eight-year-old boy named Lucas and his five-year-old sister Cleo

Olivia loved having another girl her age

They had tea parties

And played dress-up

And forced Lucas to play the prince

You taught them to bake so they could have cookies for their tea party

And Tom found himself often ambushed in one of their games

"No, daddy, you gotta pretend that the big bad dragon took you so we can save you."

They rolled around on the floor and made 'pew pew' noises to imitate guns

Lucas was always quieter

He was your little angel

You two were very close

He shared your love for writing and literature

As well as cooking, to Uncle Sam's greatest delight

You often sat down on the couch, the five of you (and Tessa, obviously) and someone read a book out loud, while the others just laid back and listened

Cleo became very interested in Uncle Harry's camera and took a bunch of photos of her sister and her dad with the polaroid camera she got for her seventh birthday

Olivia still loved the attention and remained the bright and photogenic child she'd always been

She became a model, to no one's surprise

Cleo became a freelance photographer, which allowed her to fulfill her dream of traveling the world while taking pictures and earning good money

Lucas became one of Hollywood's best and brightest screenwriters

But everyone still made time for each other

Attending every single one of Liv's fashion shows

Every time Cleo showcased her pictures in a gallery, they were the first ones there

All of Lucas' films

Going to all of Tom's premieres and wearing matching clothes, per Liv and Cleo's request

"It's for the aesthetic"

Everyone was happy

And life was good

i’m pretty happy now, ngl

i need a Tom in my life

[jawritter]

You and Me..

Chapter 2

***SERIES WARNINGS**** Rape, non-con, male!rape, injury, violence, description of injury caused by rape, nightmares, self-harm, panic attacks, implied female non-con, language, ass hole Jensen, hurt!Jensen, dark fic, smut. If there is anything else I will add it as I go.

***Chapter Warnings*** This chapter is pretty light. Mentions of death of characters parents, Jensen is a little bit of an ass, language, that’s pretty much it. 

Word Count: 2057

Pairing: Jensen Ackles X Reader, Jared x reader, OFC Steve x Reader, OFC Justin x Reader.

A/N: When I originally wrote this chapter I didn’t even know who Steve Carlson was, so the Steve in this story isn’t him lol. Oddly enough I wrote this before I even really knew he was making an album lol. Anyway, all mistakes are mine, please don’t copy my work, Feedback is golden. If you want to be added to the series tag list, or my tag list just let me know! I hope you enjoy this one. After this chapter things tend to start to pick up a little.

Summary: It’s funny how one choice you made can change your whole life. One mistake can alter your course, and set you on a path that forever will haunt you. Two people find themselves getting through one of the hardest trials of Jensen’s life, on just one small promise. You and Me. We’ll get through it together…

Want more? Check out my Masterlist!!

***MASTERLIST***

***YOU AND ME MASTERLIST***

You woke up, much like you do every morning, with the alarm clock going off obnoxiously on your bedside table.  Mornings were never your thing, but the bills weren't going to pay themselves. You rub your face hard, trying to force your eyes to focus, and your body to stay awake even though it was putting up one hell of a fight. It wants sleep, and you so desperately want to give it just that.

Finally, after about 15 minutes you roll yourself over and stand up next to the bed, looking around your messy room. You had just moved back to Austin not all that long ago. You had always lived in Texas in one place or another, but just one family vacation to Austin when you were a teenager and you were in love with the city. So as soon as you graduated high school you wasted no time in putting your application in for the University of Texas.

Much to your surprise, and a few others, you were accepted. You had wanted to major in either writing or music. Everything went great for about the first semester. Your grades were good. You worked nights at a local bar, much like a lot of your classmates,  and spent your days in classes. You had new made friends, and you were finally starting to get your foothold in life. Well, that's what you thought anyway.

At the end of your first semester of college, your mother was diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer. When your family called you moved back to your home town, dropping everything to be with your family. Your mother and you were very close. There was no way you were going to stay away while she fights this demon that they call cancer.

It was a long fight. Over and over again she defied the odds of the doctors and everyone around her. Still, after a long five-year battle she lost her fight with the disease. Once the funeral was over you knew it was way too late to go back to college. You had taken some online courses though, and gotten your degree in creative writing while you were at home taking care of your mother.

You and your father had never really gotten along, so staying home wasn't going to be an option. With all that in mind, you did the only thing you knew to do. You made the move back to Austin in the same month as your mother's funeral. Your father had over the years fallen into alcoholism. He'd always fought it, but after your mother's death, it only got the best of him. You weren’t going to stick around and watch him destroy himself.

Last year he straightened out a curve on the way home. He never survived the crash. Your brother had him cremated. He didn't even bother calling you, and telling you till it was all over. Your brother wasn't happy about you leaving home. He blamed you for your dad's struggle with the bottle after mom died, but that wasn't your fault. You didn't put a funnel in his mouth and make him drink. No one twisted his arm. He did it all on his own.

For the past three years, you had been renting an apartment in downtown Austin. It was a small, just a studio apartment, but it was all you needed. You had also landed a job at a small recording stupid in Austin. Even though you loved writing, and still did it on the side, you hadn't gotten your break yet. Music was your passion. It was what got you up in the morning, and helped you make it through the day. It was your therapy. Your outlet. Your escape from this shit existence that was your life.

You had slowly worked your way up In the studio. Starting with getting coffee, and cleaning behind the artist that came in to record. It didn't take long for Steve, your boss, to see that you had a good ear for music. He put you helping in the recording booth not long after you started.

Today you were informed that there would be a new local artist coming in to start his recording process and you were put on his beat. They didn't tell you his name, but they did say that you would probably recognize him. Even though he was local, he was famous, but they didn’t tell you who he was in order to keep rumors down the only one who knew who was coming was Steve. They made you swear not to tell anyone that he was recording, telling you that he wanted it to stay a secret until the album was done. That's why he chose a local recording studio instead of some big one in California.

As you walked to the studio this morning your nerves were vibrating. Justin, another sound tech that would be working with you today, greeted you at the door.

"You ready Y/N?" he asked, greeting you with a smile over his shoulder.

"Ready as I'll ever be," you tell him, putting your purse under the counter in the lockbox you all used and turning your phone on silent. No outside noises were ever allowed in the studio.

"Well I hate to put more on us than we already got, but there are two things you need to know before the artist gets here today. First, Jennifer, the girl that normally does the coffee, drinks, and whatever else the artist needs isn't going to be here today, her son has strep. Second, Steve will also be sitting in on today's session," he said, looking at you apologetically. 

You hated working with Steve. He was such a jerk when it came to recording time. He wanted everything done too quickly. Always in a rush to make a deadline instead of taking his time, and getting the best recording.

Jennifer being gone, and two other guys in the sound room with you means that you will most likely be stuck on snake detail for this artist, and whatever bunch of groupies he's bringing with him all day.

"Lovely,” you said with a sarcastic eye roll. Justin continued to look at you apologetically.  

“It's cool, let's just get this started. I'll get the recording room ready. How many are in his party today?" you asked, waiting for the answer that you dreaded the most.

"Only one other guy will be coming with him today from what I understand. Today is gonna be a lot of met and discuss. From what I understand there will be a guest singing on this album too. So it's probably a good thing Steve's gonna be here. If this guy is a prick then Steve can handle him." 

Justin's attitude toward the whole situation cracked you up. Apparently, he was just as excited about this as you were.

You walk into the recording room and begin to sit out beers, whiskey, water, and even start the coffee pot going in the break room. You walk back in the recording room and start sitting out shot glasses and other things when you heard voices coming your way. You look up in time to meet a pair of deep emerald green eyes staring back at you.

Your breath catches in your throat as you look around the room at all the men.

"I'm the only chick, great," you think to yourself, but there was something about the smirk on the man's face standing in front of you with the emerald green eyes that made your stomach do flips with a feeling you've never felt before.

He smiled at you and It nearly knocked you off your feet. Damn, this guy is gorgeous. That's when Steve decided to speak up.

"Y/N, this is Mr. Jensen Ackles, and his friend, Jared. Mr. Ackles has graciously chosen our stupid to record his debut album," Steve says, moving to stand beside Jensen.

You try to keep your jaw from hitting the floor as you take in the two actors standing in front of you. You had been a fan of Supernatural for years.

You nod at the two men. "It's nice to meet," you say, and they both smile back at you. Neither spoke, which you found odd. When you watched the con videos online they seemed so friendly.

"The room is ready, Steve," you tell your boss, then quickly as you can scamper into the sound room with Justin to wait for them to get started. 

You didn't really need to know what all they were doing. You just needed to make sure that whatever they were doing sounded good on tape.

"You alright Y/N?" Justin asks as you sit down in the chair with a huff.

"Yeah, That's Jensen freaking Ackles. I'm going to be working with Jensen freaking Ackles," you say in a state of shock.

"Easy girl, you know celebrities don't like to be fangirled all over," Justin says with a chuckle as he fires up the equipment and computers.

"I'm a professional Justin. I'm not going to fangirl all over anyone," you tell him with an eye roll. 

You watch as the men stand there and talk, pointing to different things. Steve getting Jensen ready to get started.

After a few hours of recording, and some drinks later Jensen, as well as Steve and Jared, had loosened up a little. Jared was in the sound room with you guys watching his best friend work. He was easy to talk to. During a break in recording while you were downloading the song he just recorded into the computer, Jared had been showing you pictures of his kids. He'd been cracking you all up with stories for the past hour.

"See this is Tom, trying to prank his little brother with a whip cream pie," he said, leaning over to you, showing you the video. That's when the two of you heard Jensen’s deep voice boom over the monitors.

"Hey, Steve, tell your girl in there to stop flirting with a married man, and go bring me some fucking coffee."

The whole room turned to look at you. Jensen was still sitting in the recording room with a guitar in his lap, giving you a cold stare through the thick glass. The comment stung. You weren't his damn maid, and you weren't flirting with a married man. Steve gave you an apologetic look. You knew you had to play along. Jensen was paying them a lot of money. So if he wanted you to shine his shoes while he sang you had to do it.

"Right away Mr. Ackles," Steve said, giving you a look that screamed, “I'm sorry.” 

Jared was giving his friend a death glare that Jensen didn’t seem to notice, or at least didn’t care.

"I'm sorry Y/N, he's just been a little on edge lately. That's not normally Jensen," Jared apologizing for his friend as you stand to go get his coffee for him.

"It's fine," was all you can say. 

In truth though, you felt like he'd just ripped your heart out and stomped on it. Not to mention humiliated you in front of your boss and coworker.  You fought back tears as you poured his coffee and entered the recording room.

You handed him his coffee, not even looking at him. He snatched it out of your hand, not even looking at you or saying thank you. You thought you had a crush on this guy. Turns out he's an ass hole like every other celebrity and artist you'd ever meet. Just another cocky dick that thought his shit didn’t stink.

Watching him on Supernatural and Smallville had gotten you through some really hard times in your life. You would have never thought he’d have done anything like he just did to you. You always pictured him as such a nice, genuine guy. Man, were you ever wrong.

You made your way from the recording room to the front where you kept your purse under the counter and shot Steve a text that said you weren’t feeling good, and you had to go home. Which wasn’t totally a lie, because your heart was broken, and you couldn’t stop the wave of tears that were streaming down your face.

You didn’t know why that one man’s opinion had hurt so much. You didn’t know him, and he didn’t know you, but as you fell back through the doors of the apartment you felt like your heart was shattered into a thousand pieces.

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Tag List:

@deanwanddamons​​ @imabitch4jensen​​ @rvgrsbrns​​ @bi-danvers0​​ @onethirstyunicorn​​ @i-love-superhero​​ @akshi8278​ @alanegaming​ @magssteenkamp​ @lemondropirwin​

You and Me Tag List:

@idksupernatural​ 

@fuzzycloudsz 

@supernatural-bellawinchester​ 

@magssteenkamp​

@vicmc624​

[flirting-with-psychology]

REFLECTIONS Answer the following questions:

What is the single best thing that happened in the past year?

2015:  The beginning of the fall semester when I grew a lot more confidence

2016: Studied abroad

2017: Graduated

2018: Moved into the B Flat

2019: Got a boyfriend

2020: Got a car

2. What is the most challenging thing that happened to you in 2015/16/17/18/19/20?

2015: Getting over Marble maybe

2016: Getting over Hawaii

2017: Making my 4500 film

2018: The music videos I did

2019: Deciding whether to date my now boyfriend

2020: The entire pandemic

3. What thing did you learn the most from this year?

2015: Hawaii and Marble

2016: My film class

2017: Also my film class

2018: My film jobs and internships

2019: Starting a relationship

2020: I guess the pandemic

4. What is the kindest thing you did this year?

2015:  I don’t think I’m the one to ask, you’d have to ask people who perceived kindness

2016: Same

2017: Same

2018: Same

2019: Same

2020: Wore a mask

5. Did you lose any close family member this year?

2015: Nope

2016: No

2017: No

2018: My great aunt died

2019: No close ones, but my grandma’s dementia is getting so bad she doesn’t remember who I am

2020: No

6. Pick three words to describe 2015/16/17/18/19/20.

2015: A learning experience

2016: Single, senior, band

2017: Senior to graduate

2018: Almost an adult

2019: Another year older

2020: Covid, long, stagnant

7. What did you do in 2015/16/17/18/19/20 that you never did before?

2015: Got further than I ever had in my love life

2016: Studied abroad

2017: Moved into a house with roommates

2018: Moved in with male roommates, did an internship

2019: Got a boyfriend

2020: Bought a car

8. Did you keep last year’s resolutions? What were they?

2015: Here we go. Put one happy moment from each day into a jar: YES. Go to the gym regularly: Doing better but still could use improvement. Get a summer job: Yes. Make an effort to eat breakfast: Haha nope. Make an effort to look pretty: About the same as last year. Talk to people more and appear more confident: Yes. Find things to be excited about: Not as much as I want. Find a boyfriend: NOPE. Write more: Not really. Read more: Maybe a little. Have adventures: Some, but not as much as I would like. Initiate things: Yes. Use “I” more: Yes. Be less mean to myself: Yes. Overthink less: No, still working on that. Be proud of myself for trying my best but accept not being perfect: I guess. Take responsibility: More. Be positive and enthusiastic: Still working on it. Carpe diem: Not enough.

2016: I can’t remember lol

2017: I can’t remember what I wrote. Here’s what I’ll do: write my 2018 resolutions so that when I reblog this next year I will know:

2018: Be more adventurous: Maybe? Overthink and strategize less: HA not really. Get a film job: Yes. Eat more vegetables: Maybe a little but still not enough. Go to the gym, like, ever: Yes. Read more: Kinda. Finish my Harry Potter spellbook: Not yet.

2019: Get a boyfriend: Finally did! Be more spontaneous and adventurous: Kinda? Sometimes? Lose weight and eat better: Nope. Read more books: Nope. Finish my Harry Potter spellbook: Not yet. Learn how to work hard: Not really. Spend more time with my friends: Kinda. Love myself, and be someone I love: Not really. Carpe diem: Sometimes. Keep doing the moment calendar and journal: Yes. Earn more money than I spend: Nope. Travel: Yes. Discover new music: Yes. Try new creative things: Yes. Believe in myself: Not really. Learn to be a leader: Nope. Watch more movies: Some. Think about other people: Tried to. Learn how to make mistakes: Kinda.

2020: Get a new job: No. Lose weight and fit into my dresses again: Noope, the opposite. Read more books: A couple. Spend more time with friends: Haha, nope, although I did zoom with them some. Go on dates: Not really. Keep doing the moment calendar and journal: Yes. Try new creative things: Yes, I tried dice making. Take risks even if they cost money: Yes, again the dice making. Make more money than I spend: Actually yes with the stimulus. Make jewelry: Some, and opened and etsy page. Get back to people in a timely manner: So-so. Be more punctual: Nope. Finish my harry potter spellbook and keep up with my character book: Nope. Learn new things: Not enough. Be the kind of person I wish I could be: No. Be more open to ideas: No. Post more pictures online: No. Don’t be such a control freak: Not even a little bit. Worry less about what people think: Kinda. Laugh more: No.

2021 resolutions: Get an interesting job. Get my own apartment. Get a covid vaccine. Lose weight. Keep doing my sticky notes and moment calendar. Be less hard on myself. Survive. 

9. Did you travel to any interesting places in 2015/16/17/18/19/20?

2015: Went to Las Vegas for my birthday and California with the band and Kentucky to see Paul McCartney.

2016: Went to Italy, went on band trips to California and Texas

2017: Went to London with my mom, went to New Orleans for my cousin’s wedding and hooked up with my 6th grade crush, went to Wyoming for the solar eclipse

2018: Went to Las Vegas for a film shoot

2019: Went to Israel

2020: Went to Harry Potter World in Orlando with my boyfriend

10. What would you like to have in 2016/17/18/19/20/21 that you lacked in 2015/16/17/18/19/20?

2015: A BOYFRIEND HAHAHA

2016: Still a boyfriend lmao fml

2017: Still a boyfriend but one that I feel satisfied with. I’m not sure if I’m there with Guacamole. Also he’s not even my boyfriend yet

2018: Still a boyfriend lmao

2019: An interesting job (finally got the boyfriend!)

2020: A job, an apartment, and a vaccine

11. Do you even believe in new year’s resolutions? Why or why not?

2015: I think they are a good idea, for reflection as much as goals.

2016: Maybe. Idk

2017: Yeah it’s a good idea

2018: It’s always good to try to better yourself and it gives you motivation to do it

2019: It’s a good idea for goals

2020: It’s good to make goals and remind yourself what to work on

12. Do you believe that 2015/16/17/18/19/20 had an reoccurring theme for you? If so, which theme and why?

2015: No more than any other year really

2016: More like my entire life has a recurring theme of being single af

2017: Not really

2018: Boys I like having girlfriends

2019: Macy’s

2020: Covid

13. Do you feel like 2015/16/17/18/19/20 went by too fast?

2015: No

2016: It went a little fast, especially now that I’m about to graduate

2017: Not really

2018: Not really, but maybe my youth went too fast

2019: It went by too fast for how much I accomplished

2020: It went by way too slow

14. Did you fall in love with any new artists during the year 2015/16/17/18/19/20? List them.

2015: I fell back in love with Taylor Swift

2016: Collabro

2017: Anastasia the Musical cast, and Hamilton is growing on me

2018: A bunch of musicals

2019: My musicals playlist on spotify has Rent, Dear Evan Hansen, Legally Blonde, Galavant, Hamilton, A Star Is Born, Frozen 2

2020: Fell more in love with taylor Swift, and Come From Away

15. Brag about two of your accomplishments in 2015/16/17/18/19/20.

2015: I made a couple cool music videos, and I lost some weight after increasing my gym attendance.

2016: I made a short film, Pancakes, with a full crew. I got straight A’s in the spring.

2017: I graduated and I made another short film

2018: I worked on two film shoots and I got promoted at work

2019: I stayed in touch with friends I made on a film shoot, and I got a boyfriend

2020: Bought a car and was the costume designer for a TV pilot

16. What was your favorite movie that came out this year?

2015: The Martian

2016: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

2017: Coco

2018: A Star Is Born

2019: Rocketman

2020: None of them were really memorable

17. Fill in the blank: In 2016/17/18/19/20/21 I will ____________.

2015: Get the confidence back that I had in the fall

2016: Graduate college

2017: Start looking for film jobs

2018: Find myself

2019: Find a new job

2020: Survive, please

18. If you could fly anywhere in the world in 2016/17/18/19/2021, where would you go?

2015: Italy, and I plan to!

2016: London, and I plan to

2017: Scotland or Ireland, and I don’t have any plans to

2018: Maybe that Israel birthright thing

2019: Maybe Ireland or Amsterdam

2020: Wherever has the least amount of covid. Of course that probably means they wouldn’t let me in

19. What was your biggest regret of 2015/16/17/18/19/20?

2015: Worrying about the future when I had something good rather than just enjoying it

2016: Not trying enough in making friends and making the most out of it

2017: Maybe not getting quite enough out of college

2018: Forgetting or never quite learning how to work hard. That and not asking a cute guy out in time

2019: Not buying that moonstone necklace

2020: Gaining weight

20. Do you think you’ll be having a better 2016/17/18/19/20/21 than 2015/16/17/18/19/20?

2015: I hope so

2016: I hope so

2017: I hope so

2018: I hope so and I think so

2019: I sure hope so

2020: I fucking hope so

21. Did you make any new friends this year? Lose any friends?

2015: I got closer with some friends :)

2016: I made some new band and film friends. One of my friends from freshman year died.

2017: I almost lost a friend but now we seem to be friends again. I also made some new ones

2018: I made some new ones, and kinda stopped being friends with some of my old roommates

2019: I think I got closer to some friends

2020: I met a few online playing among us, and I probably lost my roommates

22. What was the biggest adventure of the last year?

2015: Hawaii, I think

2016: Studying abroad

2017: Moving out and starting to adult

2018: The film shoots

2019: Dating my boyfriend

2020: Harry Potter World

23. Did you get cake on your birthday? Presents? What you wanted?

2015: Yeah I went to Vegas which was cool! Got cake and alcohol and presents

2016: I did not get cake but I got IHOP. I got presents, and the football team won the game that day sending us to the PAC 12 Championship

2017: I got pancakes, presents, and maybe I’m starting to get what I wanted?

2018: I got chocolate mousse and presents and I didn’t even know what I wanted

2019: I got cake and presents including one thing I wanted

2020: I got bundt cake and a few things from my wish list

24. How much did you change this year? What’s different about you?

2015: Not too much has changed but I think I’m prettier, more confident, braver, and value bravery more.

2016: I’m lazier, gained back the weight that I lost last year, and lost some of the confidence from last year. Wow…

2017: I’m not a student anymore

2018: I maybe lost some of my hope in my love life and felt more set in my ways

2019: I don’t have as much FOMO but I’m also getting more frustrated with my life

2020: Gained weight, got more anxiety

CONFESSIONS

Bold the statements that are true (2015) and cross out (2016) and italicize (2017) and I’m running out of formats so CAPS (2018) and *star (2019) and ~tilde (2020)

In the year 2015/2016/2017/2018/2019/2020 I confess that I….

KISSED SOMEONE I HAVE NEVER KISSED BEFORE. ~*DID SOMETHING I REGRET. *Painted a picture. *Dyed my hair. Got a new haircut I thought I’d never get before. Wrote a poem. Graduated from High School. Graduated from College. Applied for Graduate School. RAN A MILE. Ate much healthier. Ended toxic friendships. ~*GAINED A NEW FRIEND. Gained a new best friend. *Visited a foreign country. ~*LIED. ~*HAD A FIGHT WITH MY PARENTS. *HAD A SECRET/KEPT A SECRET. Realized my homosexuality. ~REALIZED MY BISEXUALITY. (OR AT LEAST QUESTIONED IT) Realized my pansexuality. Realized my asexuality. ~*Broke a promise. *Slept under the stars. ~*STAYED UP TILL SUNRISE. ~*PUSHED SOMEONE AWAY. ~*Got in a fight. SLEPT WITH SOMEONE OTHER THAN MY SIGNIFICANT OTHER. ~*ATTENDED A PARTY. Got dumped. Got a new piercing/tattoo. Learned that I wasn’t cis gender. Drank underage/used illegal substances. *ATTENDED A CONCERT. *ATTENDED A MUSICAL. ~*TRAVELED TO ANOTHER CITY. *Broke someone’s heart. *Hiding something from someone. ~*MADE SOMEONE’S DAY. Cheated on a test/homework. Physically cheated on my significant other. ~*Emotionally cheated on my significant other. ~Quit a job. GOT A NEW JOB. Learned to hate someone I thought I never would. Learned to be more patient. Saw the supermoon. ~SAW THE METEOR SHOWER.

[ofmargos]

chicago’s very own margo rosas has been spotted on madison avenue driving a mercedes-AMG G65 , welcome ! your resemblance to camila mendes is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty-third birthday bash  . your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re distrusting , but being passionate might help you . i think being a scorpio explains that . 3 things that would paint  a  better picture of you would be lipstick stained kisses on mirrors , doing vocal warm-ups five minutes before top of show , popping bottles of bubbly to celebrate buying a new pair of shoes . ( my biological dad paid off my mom to keep my relation to him a secret ) & ( cis-female + she / her  ) +  (  lia , 20 , she / her , cst )

whAT is up my dudes ! i’m lia & i lowkey missed wealthy & writing for my bbygirl margo so i’m rlly excited to be here !!!! if you know her from before i’m sorry lmao i’ve tweaked her background a bit but everything else is p much the same ig ?? she’s fun , she’s a dumbitch , & she’s here to make things harder than they need to be probs . but if you wanna know more , i wrote a novel below so plz enjoy that . if you wanna plot then LIKE THIS & i’ll slide in your im’s.or if you prefer discord hmu @  𝐛𝐛𝐧𝐨$𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐥#1904. i look forward to writing with y’all ! <3

S T A T S ↴

-- * FULL NAME : margaret lucia rosas -- NICKNAME(S) : margo ( preferred name , started introducing herself to people as “margo” back in like the 7th or 8th grade ??? who’s margaret ? we don’t know her ) , mar , mars -- * AGE : twenty-three -- * D.O.B : october 31 -- * ZODIAC : scorpio -- * GENDER : cis-female --* ORIENTATION : heterosexual heteroromantic -- * HEIGHT : 5′2″ -- * NATIONALITY : american -- * BIRTHPLACE : chicago , illinois -- * OCCUPATION : broadway performer -- * TRAITS : passionate , creative , dramatic , distrusting , outgoing , ambitious , fun-loving , loyal , daring , sarcastic , stubborn , overconfident , impulsive , hard-working , petty , secretive lowkey

B I O G R A P H Y ↴

( TW : BRIEF MENTIONS OF ABORTION, ALCOHOLISM, AND DRUG USE )

   first things first , i’m just going to say it-- margo was an accident . and her story begins with her mother , stassia , who was born and raised on the wrong side of the tracks in chicago , illinois . although she was born into poverty , she had big aspirations for herself and wanted a better lifestyle . her ambition and work ethic were unmatched , and that’s how she managed to get into columbia university ( thank you scholariship $$ ). stassia was in the middle of struggling through her college years when she met her future baby daddy . he was older , going through grad school , and the sole heir to a billion-dollar company . the sparks between them flew instantly despite their differences and they messed around for the better part of a year before the unexpected happened . stassia found herself taking a pregnancy test in the bathroom in between finals ( #justcollegethings , amirite ) and swore she was going to pass out when she noticed the double lines . and let’s just say that her baby daddy did NOT take the news well . a lot of horrible things were said that day . too many hurt feelings for the relationship ( that apparently was never that serious to homeboy ) to carry on . ( TRIGGER WARNING !!! ) so he cut all ties with stassia-- but not before giving her a crazy proposition : get an abortion and never talk to him again OR keep the baby but tell absolutely no one it’s his and never talk to him again . they both seemed like shitty options to stassia , who was actually tragically in love w him , but when he even offered to PAY HER a hefty sum ( i’m talking millions of dollars ) to keep the secret .. well-- it seemed like a blessing in disguise . she’d finally have the funds to live the life she always wanted . even if there was now a baby she didn’t plan for in the mix . so she took the hush money , had the baby in secret , and ran off to completely reinvented herself . ( TRIGGER WARNING END )

    although margo’s mother was born into poverty , margo certainly was not . by the time she was born , margo’s mom was ramping up to graduate college and join the high society in the heart of chicago . she got a good job , a lavish place to live , and never told margo about her past . margo grew up completely disconnected from her mother’s side of the family and had no idea of the lies she was being fed over the years . early on in margo’s childhood , her mother met a man through work who she would later go on to marry . that man is the only dad that margo has ever known . he and his daughter were a welcomed addition to their little family , making margo’s home life feel complete in some way . she was provided a good life with the dual income adding to the millions her mother kept . the life her mother always wished she had growing up . in a way , everything she did was for margo . she never wanted her babygirl to struggle like she had to .

   as she got older , margo went to all the best schools but only made average grades . she was never too concerned with academics and instead focused on her poppin’ social life and extracurriculars . during her middle school days , she developed an affinity for the performing arts . when everyone had to pick an elective , margo found herself in the theatre class and absolutely loving it . and she was good too . she had excellent stage presence and took every role she got in school productions in stride -- literally the best tree number 3 you’ve ever seen in your life . as she moved on to high school , she rose in the ranks of the theatre department until she was pretty much landing every single lead by the time she was an upperclassmen . acting was her passion , and she figured why not turn being dramatic and talking a lot ( her two most notable personality traits ) into a career . to really hone the craft , she trained herself to be a triple threat : actor , singer , and dancer ( sutton foster , eat your heart out ) . honestly truly had rachel berry in early seasons of glee vibes-- she knew she was the best around and wouldn’t stand to let anyone take the spotlight from her . her peers hated to love her talents because she acted like such a bitch to them offstage / out of character . not that margo really cared for what others thought of her anyway . self absorbed as ever , she told herself she didn’t need friends and generally pushed away any one that dared try to get close to her-- save for her sister . though somehow , someway she managed to get sucked into a small group of friends that would change her for the better ( s/o to ky and gio , sorry they had to put up w bitchy hs margo , rip )

   after graduating somewhere in the middle of her class , margo followed in her mother’s footsteps and went to columbia university . she was really only able to get in because she was a legacy and her parents made a considerable donation to the school , but we don’t talk about it . and to say that margo’s college years were transformative feels like an understatement . on one hand , they were some of the best years of her life : she got a true taste of independence , met some of her best friends ( s/o oliver and claudia ), and felt fulfilled to be in the city she had romanticized for so long-- new york baby ! but it was also a very low point for her . back in her high school years , she felt like a very big fish in a teeny tiny pond . she was hot shit , the top dog in her department , and all her hard work and effort to remain leading lady had paid off . however , at columbia she was just one in hundreds of talented people . some with more or less talent , or more or less connections , but they deserved a shot at fame just as much as she did . margo felt like she was fighting for her chance in the spotlight every single day and it was both parts exhausting and humbling for her . she had a amy march mentality “i want to be great, or nothing” and considered throwing in the towel . temporarily thrown off by the pressure to be successful , she took a small tumble from grace . ( TRIGGER WARNING !!! ) turning towards alcohol was her coping mechanism of choice . losing herself in the party scene and surrounding herself with other people that prioritized getting drunk or high over going to class and getting good grades had an obvious effect on her academic performance . ( END TRIGGER WARNING ) she almost lost her place in the BFA Theatre Program during her junior year due being on academic probation . it took a little bit of intervention on her close friends and family part to get margo clean and pull herself together . but by her senior year , she got back on track to graduate on time and participated in various shows at local theaters to build her resume . after almost losing everything she had ever worked for , a fire was lit under margo that had her determined to push herself hard than ever before and make a name for herself in the theatre world . 

   after she graduated from columbia she moved to new york permanently so that she could fully submerge herself in her work . not long after graduating , she was lucky enough to book several gigs including her big breakout role as lydia in beetlejuice the musical ! it really skyrocketed her into broadway stardom which is cool . a life long dream that once seemed unobtainable was suddenly a reality and she couldn’t have been more elated . with her sudden ( and well deserved ) success , she got a lot of media attention . soon she was getting verified on twitter , instagram , gaining a whole bunch of followers , and getting asked to be on talkshows and stuff to promote the show . honestly , truly a dream ! but her new-found fame gained the attention of another group of people .. her mom’s long lost family . one of her aunt’s ( that she previously didn’t know existed ) reached out to her through social media . and at first , margo honestly couldn’t believe that she had family that her mom never told her about . but after some thought it sort of made sense . in hindsight , her mom had always been evasive whenever margo asked about the other’s childhood or her side of the family .

   when margo told her mom about her aunt reaching out and how she wanted to meet her , her mom shut it down quick . stassia told her there were a lot of reasons that she didn’t talk to that side of the family and that was that-- PERIODT . but margo was #rebellious and went to meet with her aunt anyway . and that’s how she found out about her brazilian roots and her big ol’ loving and supportive extended family . that whole experience made margo reconsider what other things her mom was keeping from her . and boy oh boy was that a rabbit hole she shouldn’t have gone down . when margo started to demand her mother tell her the truth , it caused their relationship to grow tense . stassia eventually cracked and told her about her bio-dad and all the things she went through for margo . with the truth finally being exposed to her , margo started seeing things in a new light . like her whole life is kinda a lie and why didn’t her father want her ? where was he ? does he know who she is ? why did he never try to contact her ? has she ever walked past him in the streets and never knew ? it was all too much for her to think about so she just kinda ... shut it all out . she acted like nothing was different , even if her “ what if ” thoughts keep her up most nights . 

   if you just ignore the abandonment issues , insecurities , and her inability to handle emotions and focus solely on her success in material terms : margo’s doing really well ! she’s been living in new york full time for two (2) years now . she’s one of broadway’s most popular rising stars . having completed her run as the original lydia deetz on broadway , she’s moved on to take on the mantel of janis in mean girls on broadway . she’s learning , growing , and thriving . just trying to have a good time all the time with her friends and live the dream , baby !

P E R S O N A L I T Y  &  F U N  F A C T S ↴

margo is super fun-loving and down to clown 

will try anything once and it’s gotten her in trouble more times than she can count

also cannot stand to be bored , so she’s always looking for the next big adventure 

although she can be really ridiculous sometimes , she’s very serious when it comes to her work . she’s super hard-working and doesn’t let anything or anyone stand in the way of achieving her dreams : even herself

margo’s a very sociable girl and will talk to anyone and everyone . she’s the type that will hold a conversation for 2hrs with a stranger at a party and then when you ask her “who was that” she’s like “i don’t remember their name but i do know their entire life story so that’s cool”

has a way of making people feel like they know her really well when really she’s only letting them see 1/8th of her

keeps her personal life private normally unless you’re super good friends w her

i wouldn’t recommend pissing her off , bc she is petty as a mf and will lit rally never forget how one’s wronged her . this causes her to start fights sometimes . she’ll just bring up old shit out of no where and , since she’s nosy af , she makes everything her business and confronts people on their bs

she’s a whole liar bc she claims she’s a “retired party girl” but really party girl margo has never stopped , will never stop , can never be stopped

studied theatre in college but minored in mass communications just in case she needed a backup job

is v bad at being an adult !!!! like ... can’t cook , often forgets about her responsibilities until the last minute or needs to be reminded like 20 times , stills calls her parents to be like “how do u use a washing machine plz help” , y’know the drill . yet somehow she manages to act as a mom friend to the people that are closest to her ??? v much a “do as i say not as i do” type of hypocrite lol

she has a tiktok and posts dumb shit on there all the time w her friends and like vlogs her backstage experiences in the theater and does the stupid dances and all that stuff hehe

is learning portuguese after meeting the brazilian side of her family

self-proclaimed dancing queen and it’s not because she learned ballet , jazz , and tap whole dabbling in other styles but because when she’s drunk you will in fact catch her dancing on tables !!!!!

i cannot stress enough how bad she is at dealing with her own feelings . like ... instead of dealing with them head on she just ... shuts down . runs away . will ghost on someone she really likes just bc she’d rather leave first than get left and i hate her for it

have i mentioned how big her ego is ???? pHEW . she rides a v fine line between self confident and OVER confident . but tbh it’s just a cover up for how much she rlly hates herself , there i said it

loyalty is EVERYTHING to margo . if you got her back , she’s got your back . but if you screw her over or mess with anyone she loves then she’ll likely try to make your life a living hell IM SORRY

undiagnosed insomniac . nights she spends alone in her own bed are the hardest for her because it’s when all the bad scary thoughts creep up on her and no matter how much she wants to shut them out and just close her eyes and fall to sleep , she can’t . so she’ll often roam the city looking for a distraction or hit up her friends and bother them for some spare company

she’s doesn’t like to be alone ( not like in a romantic relationship sense -- she actually likes being single bc she’s afraid of letting ppl get close enough to hurt her ). hence why she’s always had a roommate even after she moved out of her parent’s house . if she’s not attached to her roommate / best friend kylie’s hip then she’s definitely hitting up her sister or her other friends to see if they want to hang out , even if hanging out is laying around doing nothing or running errands together . margo wants to tag along just for the company

notoriously known for coming up with terrible ideas or following through with other people’s terrible ideas without question bc #YOLO

she’s her pr agents worse nightmare simply bc she has no filter and will not change herself or what she posts just bc she has a big audience ( follow margo on social media and you’re gonna see the good , the bad , and the ugly she does not give a FUCK )

always has good intentions ! her execution / way of showing those intentions is just poor !

she is a rich girl that could not survive not being rich and doesn’t even realize how spoiled she is . spends money like it’s nothing

a mob boss ( this is a joke but also kinda not a joke )

WANTED CONNECTION PAGES HERE 

[incorrectly-quoted-queers]

Tagged by @corylion :) Will happily tag @thenorsiest @sporkandpringles @theamazingdearheart and @funky-little-vulcan but literally anyone do it please these are just some peeps off the top of my head <3 

This is a fun goofy long post soooo.... enjoy!

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?

I have... three.. but my main one is zebra print

Oh, high school days and my obsession with it

2. A food you never eat?

Animal flesh 

...

Though that implies i eat human flesh, i more meant I’m a vegetarian who eats dairy and eggs, just not meat haha 

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?

Literally depends on the season. Winter? Always too cold. Summer? Always too hot. I have a very fickle internal temperature. 

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Eating eggs and watching a Darkkmane video with my dog and SO 

5. What is your favorite candy bar?

OOOOOOHHHH toss-up between Kit-Kat’s and Reese’s Cups

I’m a chocolate deviant 

6. Have you ever been to a professional sporting event?

Yes. And I spent all of it in my dad’s business box watching Flash Gordon

7. What was the last thing you said out loud?

“Next time we go to the store, if I get a white onion, you better know I hold grudges and you’ll be eating that taco” (-_- don’t ask) 

8. What is your favorite ice cream?

Moose Tracks (but I adore ice cream so all of it’s amazing) 

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?

Good old H20

10. Do you like your wallet?

It’s this phone case wallet that’s teal and covered in bicycles. I love it and have had it for like 8 years so I’d say it’s pretty badass

11. What was the last thing you ate?

I just put a peanut into my mouth before typing this sooo.... that

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

I don’t really buy clothes all that often. Most all of my clothes are from high school/college or a oh so daring shopping spree I went on last summer just to update some of my worst wardrobe peices (and buy overalls. Overalls are the best) 

13. The last sporting event you watched?

A League of Legends Clash tournament....?

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

Either plain butter or Red Velvet

15. Who was the last person you sent a text message to?

To the SO. I was being tired and annoyed so when I was trying to sleep and he walked out of the room and left the light on I just texted him “Light??” and then he kindly turned it off. 

16. Ever go camping?

YES! I never did as a kid but my SO and I love the great outdoors. Our best vacation together was going cross country and camping at a bunch of different landmarks. Now we live in a house in the forest and it’s like we live in a cabin and I love it <3

17. Do you take vitamins?

Yep! Multivitamin every morning. 

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?

The only church services I’ve been to are funerals and that one time when I was struggling emotionally and tried to join my friend’s church. 

But then they joked about homosexuality being the work of the devil soooo I dipped

19. Do you have a tan?

Absolutely not. I’m actually sun sensitive and have to wear hats in the summer to keep my head safe. I am a pale bitch for life 

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?

HMMMMM hard call. Probably Chinese Food. Family pizza night every week is really awesome and i love it, but Chinese Food is delicious. (And fried sweet and sour tofu can take all my money)

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?

Noooooo! I don’t even drink soda. But I do have a metal, reusable straw for my giant water container :)

22. What color socks do you usually wear?

Blue? All my socks are patterned, multi-colored ones so it’s never the same. Today I’m wearing ones with penguins on them, and the penguins have scuba gear on.

23. Ever drive above the speed limit?

My first time ever driving I went way over the speed limit. 

24. What terrifies you?

Driving. 

Also the state of our world and how hard it is to be a creative in it, especially when that’s what I want to do with my life, but hey. I’m not dead i guess

25. Look to your left what do you see?

My other monitor, my computer glasses, my phone, a face mask, head phones, writing gloves, water, and 2 dark chocolate pretzels.

26. What chore do you hate?

Dog yard clean-up (obvious reasons) 

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?

Ummm... they’re from Australia I guess? 

28. What is your favorite soda?

I cannot drink soda for my health, but when I take the time to de-carbonate it, root bear, easy 

29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

Neither really. I cook almost everything. But I guess the very rare times I do, we always go in

30. Who was the last person you talked to?

My dog (SO before that) 

31. Favorite cut of beef?

None. Veggie gal :)

32. Last song you listened to?

The Weight of Us- Sanders Boehlke

33. Last book you read?

The Testaments- Margaret Atwood

34. Favorite day of the week?

Wednesdays are normally pretty nice, but Saturday is also great

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?

Yeah but I don’t wanna

36. How do you like your coffee?

Hmmm when it’s tea or hot chocolate instead

37. Favorite pair of shoes?

My blue converse

38. At what time do you usually go to bed?

11-ish 

39. At what time do you normally get up?

7:30

40. What do you prefer - sunrises or sunsets?

Sunset. Nights are my favorite

41. How many blankets are on your bed?

Oh my... my SO and I do not share blankets, and our dog has his own. Right now it’s summer so only 4, but in winter we have upwards of 7-8. 

42. Describe your kitchen plates?

We have these navy blue, tan, and gray plates that I absolutely love. They remind me of midnight waves crashing onto a beach. Obviously they are just straight lines across the plate, not actual waves, but they are awesome I love them

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?

Nooooo not on my health plan

44. Do you play cards?

Yes! We have several decks, but my favorite are the zombie cards

45. What color is your car?

No car. No color. But SO’s car is red

46. Can you change a tire?

Nope

47. What is your favorite province?

UHHHH I assume this isn’t US because we don’t have provinces, but I’ll translate it to states. Just objectively, Michigan because I live here. But i also really adore Washington. 

48. Favorite job you ever had?

Probably writing tutor or Communcations aide. I liked doing a wide breadth of writing stuff in my job, and I also enjoyed helping people. 

49. How did you get your biggest scar?

Embarrassing. I was on blood thinners because I had a clotting disorder, so I scraped my arm against a door and even though it wasn’t that deep, it bled for hours. I have an inch scar there now. 

50. What did you do today that made someone happy?

Made my SO watch a funny video in bed, offered eggs to an internet friend, and gave my sweet doggo a peanut :) 

[gayregis]

Hi, just wanted to ask, how did you get into the witcher franchise (did you read the books before you played the games or vice versa?). Love your blog, byeeee :)

ty for the ask!! i hope you dont mind if i go too in-depth because i was legit thinking about this earlier today... 

tldr: i played tw3 and liked it, then read the books

i got into the witcher because one of my favorite gaming youtubers was doing a playthrough of tw3 on youtube in around i think september 2017. i liked this specific gaming youtuber for being shit at games and not caring about it... but tw3 was a different game. it felt like the decisions mattered, that there was an actual story here, that when this youtuber made shitty decisions and didn’t really care about the characters involved, i got frustrated because this game seemed really good... so i picked up the game myself and played it though, it was magnificent. not to r/witcher “the witcher 3 is literally the best game created in this history of ever” but it was sincerely good... not only does it have a great story, characters, and graphics, but it is genuinely comfortable to play as a game, even if you’re not great at games (i like playing video games but i’m not good at them when it comes to combat, i literally just would prefer to hack and slash through). so, i played through tw3 and the fact that it made me cry multiple times i found to be really interesting... but it was still just a game to me, it wasn’t something i thought about when i have time to daydream headcanons. i had read i think the witcher (short story) halfway through playing, just to get a feel of what tw3 came from, but from that, i realized the books and the games were incredibly different entitities, and i decided to not read the books until i had finished the game, or at least until i had more free time on my hands (mind i was in high school and was a senior, and during this time was when i was submitting college applications... exceptionally stressful, and the reading/writing part of my brain was absolutely fried from essay writing and reviewing). i was particularly struck by geralt and ciri’s relationship and the isle of mists quests fucked me up pretty bad. 

then around later 2017, i was really enjoying tw3, and had finished tw3′s base game and hearts of stone, and was now making my way into blood & wine. i was just playing it like normal, then came the part when geralt met regis. at first i wasn’t too interested (i mean, i was, but in the story of blood & wine, not in the books) until the little journal text pop-up appeared on my screen. you know, the one about quests you just received, or characters you just met. it was going through the motions of saying i finished this quest, picked up this new one, i was all like fine, fine, okay, alright, and then it just fucking puts regis’ long-ass name on the screen taking up a good amount of my FOV and i am immediately like, what? what the fuck? who the fuck? that’s the name? of the guy we just met? that guy??? he didn’t seem like someone with a name like that? who the fuck IS this guy.

so i head over to the wiki page for regis. i thumb through the basic information, i’m pretty interested, this quest stuff to find ciri sounds interesting. i decide to give the witcher books another try, because i have more free time now and am way more invested as everyone here as characters. also, i want to find out more about yennefer, because she was being badmouthed by everyone i saw online, and i wanted to read more about her and see if she was really so bad (spoilers: she’s not at all, the internet is just misogynistic).

i don’t think that i’m going to actually really care about these books, i just want more flavor and explanation about how in hell a witcher met a vampire and these two somehow became friends. so, i don’t care about reading them in order. i go online and find fan translations of every book, i open baptism of fire and i just start reading the bit about the fish soup. i’m suddenly just laughing my ass off, really interested in who these other characters are, milva and cahir, and how dandelion seems to actually be the best friend to geralt that he was said to be in tw3. i also notice immediately that geralt... oh my god, geralt’s such a cranky bitch. i’m SHOCKED at how annoying geralt is. i realize that this is probably what geralt’s been like, this whole time, and tw3 just gave me a sterilized version of him. i’m trying to decide if i like this change or not, at first i HATED it... but then realized it actually gave him a character, where in tw3 he feels a little more... empty, waiting for the player to project a personality onto him.

so, i just read all of the hansa bits of baptism of fire, skipping over anything i don’t understand. i am saddened when i can’t find any more, so i move onto tower of the swallow. and then lady of the lake. “oh, so that’s why geralt was surprised to see regis in blood & wine...” feeling at a loss after reading stygga, i start at the beginning and make my way through the books chronologically, like they should be read. i soon realize that this series really isn’t about killing monsters at all, and i’m thrilled. i thought the series was just going to be about geralt killing things in a swamp and reporting back to whoever hired him, like in tw3... and i was wrong. this series is about personal connections! relationships! ... and fatherhood. [see read more for personal junk]

i can’t remember when i started disliking tw3. it must have been around the time that i finished the books (im using the word finished loosely... i still havent finished some scenes because theyre too violent to read and continue with my day in peace, and i also read tos/lotl by skipping around, so i never got the full experience of reading them as full novels).

i just distinctly remember returning to my tw3 new game+ save after rereading the fish soup scene, and thinking about how lonely the game felt... i just felt so dispairingly alone, this loneliness that i hadn’t felt while playing before, that i had to put the game down. i returned to the game again, but i had just reread edge of the world... and i felt so alone again. 

so reading the books ruined tw3 for me, not out of malicious intent, but just because i think i realized geralt isn’t meant to be the lone wolf. the novels center around him and his family and friends, and i just genuinely missed that when replaying tw3. plus, i began to realize a bunch of things, like ciri’s scar is supposed to be bigger, geralt’s supposed to wear his hair in a headband, yennefer’s hair is actually curly, dandelion’s supposed to actually be in the game. there were so many inconsistencies with the characters i had imagined while reading the books that eventually i just stopped playing tw3 (i already played it once, so nbd) and got really into the books. 

sometime later i saved up like $80 to buy the paperback versions of the books (UK versions including season of storms) because i knew i was in really deep lol and i wanted the official translations super badly, also we were doing an assignment in class that allowed us to do something with our favorite book, but we needed to have it in-person and not as an e-book, so it was the perfect excuse. much time spent on hansa headcanons later and... here we are today.

a read-more, because this is more personal. 

the witcher series picked me up at an eerily appropriate time. two things in it stood out to me: 1) geralt’s relationship with ciri 2) regis’s alcoholism. 

i distinctly remember an event where i started crying in front of my parents because my dad was being so absent in my life or maybe it was because they were arguing, something like this... and i remember referencing tw3 isle of mists quest actually by saying “i shouldn’t have to learn it (good parenting) from a video game” ... lol. it wasn’t an epic burn from a 17 yo, but it was just a painful remark made in anger. i still think back to it because of how first watching geralt hug ciri made me feel and how i was actually really bitter because i was jealous of ciri for about a week after completing the quest. then i kind of pushed it out of my mind and didn’t think so much about it, until the night i mentioned it.

in late march of 2018, something very bad happened in my family. that’s probably the best way to describe it. the situation ended in my parents finally separating. my mom and i were pretty afraid and lost after that. after i had collected my thoughts and everything and went back to as “normal” as i could, about a month later, when the creative part of my brain finally began to function again and wasn’t inhibited due to fear, i clung to the witcher more than i did before... and this time, actually particularly to regis, because guess who has a whole redemption arc relating to not being alcoholic and being a genuinely good person who speaks gently and heals the vulnerable?

[sunwritten]

hi guys  😁  i am ur girl mimi  ( she/her, mst, 22 )  and all u have to know about me is that i do nothing but keysmash , cry , listen to redvelvet and arianagrande, talk spanglish since spanish is my first language AND that i love sonic the hedgehog . now let me introduce to u to my boy  😁

̗̀   ✰   ― 〔  cha  eunwoo,  cis  male,  he/him  ）―  ❝  have  you  seen  mason  choi  walking  around  the  town  square  in  the  afternoon  ?  if  you’re  close  enough  you  might  even  be  able  to  hear  in  your  eyes  by  the  weeknd  blasting  through  their  headphones.  they’re  twenty-four  and  are  currently  working  as  a  piano instructor  /  songwriter.  once  you  get  to  know  them,  you’ll  be  able  to  find  out  that  they’re  very  candid  and  reserved,  but  also  can  be  very  lackadaisical  and  blunt.

statistics .

name: mun-hee “mason” choi .

age: 24 .

dob: january 1st , 1996 .

gender + pronouns: cis male , he/him .

zodiac: capricorn sun , libra moon , pisces raising .

orientation: bisexual , biromantic . 

religion: heavily raised under catholic influences . he doesn’t care , though .

hometown: olympia , washington .

residence: novan , south carolina .

occupation: piano instructor, but he can be a tutor for anything if he does some investigation the night prior. singer and songwriter in hopes to make it big one day. streamer and influencer on twitch, youtube and instagram. 

about .

THE JACK OF ALL TRADES: a person who is not content learning about just one thing only , developing a sense to learn something efficiently so they can be good enough at whatever they choose . raised under a strict household , mason craved to learn and experience more than what was taught under the roof of his house and church . spent most of his life reaching out ( sometimes suceeding , sometimes not ) to everything to have some kind of experience under his belt: some of these being both noticed by his parents and some others not ( and for the better ) . a quick learner and adaptable , and when he knows how to approach new skills properly , no mountain is too high for him .

the only child to a priest and a lawyer . mun-hee , eventually introducing himself as mason because he was tired of repeating his name over and over , was brought up in a wealthy and strictly catholic household in olympia , washington . he was forbidden from doing anything out of the ordinary since he could remember ; from dirtying up his sunday clothes to not attending his best friend's birthday party because his parents had the suspicion that substances were going to be involved at the party , and they didn't want him to fall into that hole . if only they knew .

was pushed into the church's choir against his own will when he turned eight , weeks later he was not only praised by his voice , but he fell in love with music . he learned how to play the piano and guitar by himself , and he was later taught by his parent's friends on how to play the violin , the flute , the drums and even the saxophone . he is currently learning how to play the cello and the harp . he specializes on piano , guitar and drums only while the others are one of his multiple , but not so developed , skills .

wrote his very first song when he was eleven ( something that got him the first place at his school's talent show ) , since then he has been writing and creating his own music . he’s currently working on trying to produce something good enough to put out one day . his passion on music caused some tension between him and his parents because , although they didn't disown him or anything , they didn't approve of it---- mostly because they had plans of having him replace his father's position at their church . this caused mason to simply not talk about music with them . it was when he graduated high school when he decided to move out to new york to attend columbia as a mathematics major with a minor on creative writing . after graduation , he moved to novan at the age of 21 because he wanted a new change of scenery .

jason has his own youtube channel , filled with vlogs about literally everything: archives of his past gaming streams on twitch , guitar/piano/bass/song covers that have gone viral on twitter and instagram time to time so he has somewhat of a following fanbase .

tidbits .

despite that i know nothing about mason so im going full force on development with him LKSJKLSJSLKJSLKJS

a himbo . he’s a really nice guy ... kinda dense .. kinda slutty ....... but at the same time he’s v reserved and doesn’t speak until someone is speaking to him bc that’s juss how he was raised U know

he’s not as religious as his parents think he is . he doesn’t... really care but that’s the religion he was raised with so . but that won’t stop him from wearing this sexc necklace with a golden cross bc he thinks he looks hot with it Mwah .

mason has a good relationship with his parents actually !!!! something that is sexc despite of the lil music tension because not only he adores them and they adore him , but he’s lowkey living off their money but at the same time he has gotten a bunch of MONIESSSS because rich people keep giving him money so he can teach their kids to play ( insert musical instrument here ) hehe .

u kno on parasite how the kim family started to do the things the park family wanted or whatever..... kinda like that . sometimes uses his skill of being a quick learner to come up with something quick and make it believable and get the monies KJKLSJSJS

a piano , guitar and drums prodigy . sings like an angel and has the voice of my man’s baekhyun with some lil justin bieber undertones u kno.....  probably v popular at karaoke bars . and he’s a songwriter too and produces and mixes his own music and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

he wants to put out music sometime but for now....... he just makes random covers on his youtube channel , a channel that became popular bc oooooooooooooo cute boy who can sing and play the piano and is funny on his videogame streams . lets subscribe and tip him ten dollars so he can sing a song to me on his next stream <3 !

has gone viral time to time bc of his covers and bc hes really funny on twitter ngl . but if someone recognizes him he gets rather shy LSKJSLKSJKSLJ 

fucks around with alcohol and some drugs but it’s nothing too wild . he has been toying w these habits since high school and he still thanks god that they never found out about this ldjldkjdkldjd 

idk what else to say

he knows how to do card and skateboard tricks but please dont ask him to do wild things on the skateboard please he just can do the basics and doesn’t fancy the idea of getting his nose broken again LKJLSKJSLKSJLKSJ

a whole ass gamer when he’s not scratching his head trying to come up with the perfect sound for a new song . will ignore phone calls and messages until he’s done . he is also one of those bitches who will make u cum and then will get up to continue his game SLKJKLSJSKLJSKLSJ

he has a white cat and a cocker spaniel: phat and kiwi! aka the loves of his life 

a hopeless romantic who has like 289739873 failed relationships . he was a puppy heartbreaker when he was in college ngl

wanted connections.

best friend or someone he’s super close with ever since he moved in

unlikely friendship

partying buddies

PARTNERS IN CRIME

maybe he can be a cornerstone to someone just kno he’s not good with advice LKSJLKSJSLKJSKLSJ

maybe someone he teaches piano??? or maybe he taught them something else IDK

maybe a muse... someone who gives him so much inspo for his music/poems mmmmm this could be multiple because he finds inspo on everyone basically

exes ( good / bad terms ) kinda want three exes so he could say ONE TAUGHT ME LOVE , ONE TAUGHT ME PATIENCE AND ONE TAUGHT ME PAIN !!!!!

one sided crush ( them @ him or him @ them )

MUTUAL CRUSH ???????????????????

someone he spoils just bc ( this should be talked abt i guess )

frenemies

mutual annoyance

maybe someone who joins him on his vlogs u kno..... like when they r together his followers (or theirs if there’s someone out there who was a youtube channel too) are like o shit hell yeah

fwb(s) because he’s a slut  -________-

bad / good influences are also good

one night stands 

idk

fuck

pokemon go buddies 

neighbors? he lives in an apartment complex and his apartment is sexc ngl 

i like to brainstorm tho

please plot with me thanks

[itsarieldanvers]

is that [CHRISTINA NADIN]? no, that’s just [ARIEL DANVERS]. [SHE/HER] is [TWENTY TWO] years old and is a [JOURNALIST]. rumor has it they’ve been in town for [TWO YEARS]. on a good day, they’re [BUBBLY & TALKATIVE]. but watch out! they can also be [JUDGEMENTAL & JEALOUS]. [THIS IS WHAT MAKES US GIRLS BY LANA DEL REY] plays in my head whenever I think of them. can’t wait to see them around Springhill! 

TW: anorexia, self-harm scars, suicide, seizures.

Full Name: Ariel Susanne Jane Danvers

Nickname: Arie

Age: 22

Date of Birth: June 22nd, 1997

Hometown: Kansas City, Missouri

Gender: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexual Orientation: Bisexual

Religion: None

Occupation: Journalist

Language(s) Spoken: English, Spanish, and some French.

Social Class: High Class

Physical Appearance

Face Claim: Christina Nadin

Hair Colour: Dark Brown

Eye Colour: Light brown

Height: 5’3”

Weight: 132 lbs.

Build: Thin

Tattoos: “Te Quiero” written by her father on her collarbone.

Clothing Style: Depends on where she is going. Out and about, she always dresses in on brand clothing or clothes from brands she’s sponsored by. At home, it’s almost always leggings and an oversized sweater.

Distinguishing Characteristics: Freckles on her face, self-harm scars on her left thigh. 

Health

Sleeping Habits: Ariel loves to sleep. She sleeps from the time her head hits the pillow to the time she wakes up. She can’t sleep very well if someone isn’t next to her though. 

Eating Habits: Ariel used to not eat at all as a teenager. Her body is pretty damaged from her struggle with anorexia, but thanks to going to rehab and getting away from her toxic mother, she now has a healthy diet and eats very healthy. She struggles at times with food though but can pull herself out of those thoughts.

Sociability: Ariel loves talking to people. She is a very social person, going out with her friends when she has time and running around the town interviewing people for articles she is writing. Her favorite place to meet new people is at the clubs, though she only goes when her friends want to. 

Alcohol Use: Very light

Mental Health Issues: Anorexia Nervosa ( Under Control ).

Personality

Positive Traits: Ambitious, Adventurous, Punctual, Articulate, Creative.

Negative Traits: Spontaneous, Emotional, Stubborn, Withdrawn, Jealous, Judgemental. 

Family

Father: Joseph Danvers

Mother: Greta Danvers (Parents are divorced)

Sibling(s): Blake Danvers (Half Brother)

Children: None

Pet(s): Monty (Parrot) Vermin (Sphynx Cat)

Born in Kansas City, Missouri, Ariel Danvers was born to Greta Danvers and Joseph Danvers at Liberty Hospital. Soon after her birth, the family relocated to Miami, Florida after her father accepted a job at NASA as an Astrophysicist. Ariel started participating in pageants when she was six, her mother dedicated her time to making outfits for her, signing her up for damn near any pageant she could get her hands on. Greta put her on a diet at age seven, despite her doctor’s strict orders to *not* put her on a diet since she’s still growing. Her mother ignored her doctor's orders and went on ahead with Ariel's insane diet. Only one meal a day, and on pageant days she could get pixie sticks and Pepsi. 

To this day, Ariel hates pixie sticks and Pepsi.

She won a lot of child beauty pageants. She participates in an average of 150 pageants in a year,, out of the 150 pageants she enters, she wins about 120. For this reason, so she could be in pageants full time, her mom homeschooled her. She barely got an education though since she found it difficult to focus on homework when she had pageants to go to. 

Ariel developed Anorexia when she was 12. Which is the main reason why Ariel is so small since she was denied that development and nutrition from a young age. 

One time when she was 16, Ariel was participating in Miss Florida. She hadn’t eaten in days and was all hyped up on Pepsi and Pixie Sticks, which was the only thing that kept her going. As she was going on stage, she had a seizure in front of thousands of people. She blacked out, then woke up in the hospital. She was severely dehydrated, starved, and had self-harm scars all over her thighs. Her doctor whose name was Dr. Kelly sat down with her and asked if her mom was forcing her to diet and starve herself. Of course, she denied it. The doctor called CPS on them, and the Danvers family was put under investigation. 

There were a lot of people in and out of her hospital room for the week she was in there, and they did find very solid evidence of her mother forcing her to starve herself. But the investigation against her mother was dropped due to Ariel saying that she was doing to herself and her mother wasn’t forcing her to at all. 

In her high school years, Ariel was a party animal. She was always sneaking out, getting drunk and high on pills. She developed a pill addiction, and once stole her dad’s debit card and took out a bunch of money so she could buy a bunch of pills. Due to this, Ariel had two choices. She either went to rehab for her pill addiction, or her dad calls the police and has her arrested. She chose to rehab and was treated for both her pill addiction and her anorexia.

 While in rehab, Ariel found an outlet she never thought she would get into. Writing. She used well over ten notebooks writing about everything that was happening in her life. While she would write about that, she started to write poetry and short stories that soon snowballed into starting a book she called “Pixie”, a book about a girl who struggled with the way she looked. She came back home three months later, went from weighing 98 pounds to 135, which was a healthy weight for her. And the moment she got home, her mother commented on how fat she had gotten. She cried for days and went back to eating less and less. Ariel’s father filed for divorce after he heard Greta comment about Ariel gaining weight, kicking Greta out. 

After her mother was out of her life, Ariel decided to get her GED and start her life over and in a more positive direction.  She smashed all of her past pageant trophies with her brother and the small family had a huge bonfire, burning most of her dresses, donating the leftover ones. Blake helped her with her GED, and after working very hard, the sixteen-year-old successfully gained her high school equivalent and was accepted at the University of Miami to study Journalism. 

During her junior year of college, Ariel met a man named Jack. He was a senior studying Photography, and he took a huge interest in her. The two started seeing each other, and eventually, they started dating. He was a very controlling and abusive man towards her, rarely was he physically abusive; it was mostly verbal and emotional abuse. She felt like she couldn’t escape him. She wasn’t eating right again, she couldn’t talk to anyone other than him, he was controlling everything about her. The only thing she had some form of control over was her grades at college, but they were slipping fast. 

Seeing that there was no way out, Ariel decided she would take her own life. She wrote everyone very detailed letters, snuck out of the apartment, and walked down to the freeway to step out in front of a car. Her brother went to visit her at her apartment, seeing that she wasn’t there sparked concern in him. Blake found the letters and called the police to try and locate her, afterward calling their dad. The Highway Patrol located her and detained her. She was hysterical and kept trying to fight the police to get back on the highway, but they had her in the car before she could do anything else. Ariel was admitted to a mental hospital to get reevaluated. 

When her life finally got back on track, Ariel graduated from Miami University with a degree in Journalism and got a job as a journalist for a newspaper in Springhill, New Jersey. She has a healthy eating routine and takes great care of herself and her house. She takes pride in her appearance, loves the way she looks and is obsessed with her job. 

[raisingsupergirl]

A Daydream In Defense of Classical Education: Love the Lord Your God With all Your Solid, Liquid, Gas, and Plasma

LentWatch 2020, Week One: Freedom!

Change is hard. Breaking habits is harder. And breaking habits without accountability is the hardest, which is probably why I've already "failed" at my personal Lent goals by snacking after dinner (c'mon, it was just a few cookies… and some meat-n-cheese… and some chips). But despite realizing my limits and having to drop that one goal, I've held strong to the rest (which you can read about by clicking here), and the results have been like a long sigh after months of holding my breath.

At first, I felt a little lost. Especially regarding social media and YouTube videos. It's amazing how we, in the 21st century, have lost the ability to sit idle. Every spare moment is taken up by checking our phones. Waiting at doctor's offices, going to the bathroom, five-second pauses in friendly conversation—they all fall victim to Instagram notifications, leaving no room for actual thought. And I almost forgot the joy of such idleness before I gave these little things up. And that, combined with cutting television down to a minimum and alcohol down to zero, has made way for that glorious thing that used to be so condemned by teachers and parents: daydreaming!

Now, one can't just cut out all entertainment cold turkey. I'm not even convinced that a human can survive on work and sleep alone. There must be some in-between where we recharge and enjoy pleasures of our own choosing. And so, instead of Facebook and Netflix and beers, I've been reading—at night, mostly, but also in the morning, and even a little during the day. As I said in my previous post, I started re-reading Celebration of Discipline. But I'm also reading The Book of Revelation, The Time Machine, and a creative young adult trilogy called The Illuminae Files. I've never been one to read multiple things at one time, but gosh, it seems like my mind has been hungry for too long, and now it's chowing down. And with the glut of all these stories and ideas, I'm finding that I pause every page or so to just think.

What am I thinking about? All kinds of stuff! For example, why water can't (typically) get hotter than 212 degrees Fahrenheit. Or why an open refrigerator will actually heat a room. Or whether Einstein was wrong about exceeding the speed of light. Or why four separate books of the Bible seem to disagree about how to love God (and thus, what it means to be human). You know, normal stuff.

WARNING: What follows is some serious musing and rambling. If you're strapped for time or are easily irritated by random details, skip to the last paragraph. You'll have no idea what the title of this post means, but hey, I'm not sure I really know, so…

Now, if you haven't checked out, you're probably just intrigued enough to wonder if I've completely lost it. But it may surprise you to know that all of the thoughts I listed above are quite related. And I never would have had them (or their subsequent "higher" questions) if I hadn't "wasted" tens of thousands of dollars on a bunch of classes that I "didn't need" in college. I would have just read the books I listed earlier with interest, and then I would have moved on with my life. But, you see, there are things that bind us—things that connect us to art, literature, history, architecture, mathematics, science, religion, and back to art again. And, for me at least, the more I fill in the gaps between these elements of the human experience, the more I appreciate it all.

I get that not everyone is like me. I get that most people are happy to learn a craft—become an expert, even—work at that craft, leave a legacy, and catch the last episode of their favorite TV shows. And that's the way it's always been. I mean, not everyone in ancient Greece was a philosopher. Not everyone in the Middle Ages received a classical education. But there may have been soldiers and peasants who would have enjoyed the experience had they been given the opportunity. And I, for one, am one of those peasants.

As I've said in previous posts, my young life was characterized by impulsiveness, which culminate in the idea that, "I should go to college and become a physical therapist." I just kind of had the idea one day, so I did it. I resonate with Elle Woods (from Legally Blonde) when she applied to Harvard Law School and said, "What, like it's hard?" Now, of course college was hard (and PT school was much more so), but I enjoyed it. All of it. Even the classes that I didn't need to take: philosophy, freshman English (in which I learned only about Little Red Riding Hood in all of her iterations throughout history…), physics, Old Testament studies, American history. Learning to enjoy education was a slow burn, and it definitely didn't peak until college. If I'd have followed my first inclinations as a senior in high school, I would have joined the military or the police academy, and I would have had a fulfilling career in either (likely with a more impactful contribution to society), but I never would have understood the universe in the way that I do now. And that would have been a real shame.

But I did go to college, and I did rack up student loans (which I'm scheduled to pay off this spring!). And I did come close to what could be called a classical education, which laid the foundation for me to continue to learn, grow, and connect thoughts and ideas into new and creative concepts… some of which are kind of insane, like the one's I mentioned above, which I will now explain briefly (but only if you see the dragon in this picture I took below. Why? Because it’s awesome, and if you don’t see it, you’re not worthy--aka weird enough--to continue):

Thanks to the books I'm reading in tandem—along with plenty of breaks spent daydreaming in idle, wandering thought—I've dredged up an old fascination of mine: Why is the Great Commandment represented in four different ways in the Bible? "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." That's how the author of Deuteronomy puts it. But then when the verse is quoted by Jesus thousands of years later, Matthew, Mark, and Luke all put it in slightly different terms: "heart, soul, and mind," "heart, soul, mind, and strength," and "heart, soul, strength, and mind," respectively. Now, I realize the differences are subtle, and Mark and Luke both say the same things in a different order, but they are different. And when the essence of the phrase is, "Love God with everything you have," it's easy to wonder if these components make up everything it means to be human. And further research into the original languages in which these phrases were written sheds some light onto the discrepancy: English (and Greek, for that matter) doesn't have the words to describe the original Hebrew text, so slight variations are represented based on who's writing it and in what language.

But the intrigue remains. What does make up a human? And the answer, for someone like me (OCD, science-minded, Christian foundation), it's clear that we're bound together by a multifaceted system, like the Holy Trinity or the Four States of Matter. And so, if we take the States of Matter approach, what if our strength (bones, muscles, tendons) is akin to "solids," our heart (hormones, neurotransmitters, basic emotions) is akin to "liquids," our mind (cortical thought, short-term memories, self-awareness) is akin to "gas," and our soul (that ethereal, immortal morality not bound to social constructs or genetic influence) is akin to "plasma?" And so, such extrapolation (i.e. going down the Wikipedia rabbit hole) naturally leads to all sorts of allegory and thought puzzles. Oh, what fun it is to dream!

LAST PARAGRAPH BELOW FOR NORMAL PEOPLE:

Like I said, cutting the distractions from my day has allowed me to get back to the things that bring me true joy: quiet contemplation, purposeful living, and totally normal ideas about what it means to be human. Week one has been a success. I'm thankful for the money I "wasted" on my education because it's made me the man I am today, and I'm thankful for Lent because, even though I will inevitably fail at some of it, my ultimate victory will be remembering who I am as a man (which, apparently, boils down to the various states of matter…). So, thanks for reading, y'all. You could have been doing a bunch of other things (and you probably wish you had), but hopefully my rambling forced you to have at least one thought of your own.

And maybe, just maybe, that thought will lead to a daydream…

[flirting-with-psychology]

REFLECTIONS Answer the following questions:

What is the single best thing that happened in the past year?

2015:  The beginning of the fall semester when I grew a lot more confidence

2016: Studied abroad

2017: Graduated

2018: Moved into the B Flat

2019: Got a boyfriend

 2. What is the most challenging thing that happened to you in 2015/16/17/18/19?

2015: Getting over Marble maybe

2016: Getting over Hawaii

2017: Making my 4500 film

2018: The music videos I did

2019: Deciding whether to date my now boyfriend

 3. What thing did you learn the most from this year?

2015: Hawaii and Marble

2016: My film class

2017: Also my film class

2018: My film jobs and internships

2019: Starting a relationship

 4. What is the kindest thing you did this year?

2015:  I don’t think I’m the one to ask, you’d have to ask people who perceived kindness

2016: Same

2017: Same

2018: Same

2019: Same

 5. Did you lose any close family member this year?

2015: Nope

2016: No

2017: No

2018: My great aunt died

2019: No close ones, but my grandma’s dementia is getting so bad she doesn’t remember who I am

 6. Pick three words to describe 2015/16/17/18/19.

2015: A learning experience

2016: Single, senior, band

2017: Senior to graduate

2018: Almost an adult

2019: Another year older

 7. What did you do in 2015/16/17/18/19 that you never did before?

2015: Got further than I ever had in my love life

2016: Studied abroad

2017: Moved into a house with roommates

2018: Moved in with male roommates, did an internship

2019: Got a boyfriend

 8. Did you keep last year’s resolutions? What were they?

2015: Here we go. Put one happy moment from each day into a jar: YES. Go to the gym regularly: Doing better but still could use improvement. Get a summer job: Yes. Make an effort to eat breakfast: Haha nope. Make an effort to look pretty: About the same as last year. Talk to people more and appear more confident: Yes. Find things to be excited about: Not as much as I want. Find a boyfriend: NOPE. Write more: Not really. Read more: Maybe a little. Have adventures: Some, but not as much as I would like. Initiate things: Yes. Use “I” more: Yes. Be less mean to myself: Yes. Overthink less: No, still working on that. Be proud of myself for trying my best but accept not being perfect: I guess. Take responsibility: More. Be positive and enthusiastic: Still working on it. Carpe diem: Not enough.

2016: I can’t remember lol

2017: I can’t remember what I wrote. Here’s what I’ll do: write my 2018 resolutions so that when I reblog this next year I will know:

2018: Be more adventurous: Maybe? Overthink and strategize less: HA not really. Get a film job: Yes. Eat more vegetables: Maybe a little but still not enough. Go to the gym, like, ever: Yes. Read more: Kinda. Finish my Harry Potter spellbook: Not yet.

2019: Get a boyfriend: Finally did! Be more spontaneous and adventurous: Kinda? Sometimes? Lose weight and eat better: Nope. Read more books: Nope. Finish my Harry Potter spellbook: Not yet. Learn how to work hard: Not really. Spend more time with my friends: Kinda. Love myself, and be someone I love: Not really. Carpe diem: Sometimes. Keep doing the moment calendar and journal: Yes. Earn more money than I spend: Nope. Travel: Yes. Discover new music: Yes. Try new creative things: Yes. Believe in myself: Not really. Learn to be a leader: Nope. Watch more movies: Some. Think about other people: Tried to. Learn how to make mistakes: Kinda.

2020 resolutions: Get a new job. Lose weight and fit into my dresses again. Read more books. Spend more time with friends. Go on dates. Keep doing the moment calendar and journal. Try new creative things. Take risks even if they cost money. Make more money than I spend. Make jewelry. Get back to people in a timely manner. Be more punctual. Finish my harry potter spellbook and keep up with my character book. Learn new things. Be the kind of person I wish I could be. Be more open to ideas. Post more pictures online. Don’t be such a control freak. Worry less about what people think. Laugh more.

 9. Did you travel to any interesting places in 2015/16/17/18/19?

2015: Went to Las Vegas for my birthday and California with the band and Kentucky to see Paul McCartney.

2016: Went to Italy, went on band trips to California and Texas

2017: Went to London with my mom, went to New Orleans for my cousin’s wedding and hooked up with my 6th grade crush, went to Wyoming for the solar eclipse

2018: Went to Las Vegas for a film shoot

2019: Went to Israel 

10. What would you like to have in 2016/17/18/19/20 that you lacked in 2015/16/17/18/19?

2015: A BOYFRIEND HAHAHA

2016: Still a boyfriend lmao fml

2017: Still a boyfriend but one that I feel satisfied with. I’m not sure if I’m there with Guacamole. Also he’s not even my boyfriend yet

2018: Still a boyfriend lmao

2019: An interesting job (finally got the boyfriend!)

11. Do you even believe in new year’s resolutions? Why or why not?

2015: I think they are a good idea, for reflection as much as goals.

2016: Maybe. Idk

2017: Yeah it’s a good idea

2018: It’s always good to try to better yourself and it gives you motivation to do it

2019: It’s a good idea for goals

12. Do you believe that 2015/16/17/18/19 had an reoccurring theme for you? If so, which theme and why?

2015: No more than any other year really

2016: More like my entire life has a recurring theme of being single af

2017: Not really

2018: Boys I like having girlfriends

2019: Macy’s

13. Do you feel like 2015/16/17/18/19 went by too fast?

2015: No

2016: It went a little fast, especially now that I’m about to graduate

2017: Not really

2018: Not really, but maybe my youth went too fast

2019: It went by too fast for how much I accomplished

14. Did you fall in love with any new artists during the year 2015/16/17/18/19? List them.

2015: I fell back in love with Taylor Swift

2016: Collabro

2017: Anastasia the Musical cast, and Hamilton is growing on me

2018: A bunch of musicals

2019: My musicals playlist on spotify has Rent, Dear Evan Hansen, Legally Blonde, Galavant, Hamilton, A Star Is Born, Frozen 2

15. Brag about two of your accomplishments in 2015/16/17/18/19.

2015: I made a couple cool music videos, and I lost some weight after increasing my gym attendance.

2016: I made a short film, Pancakes, with a full crew. I got straight A’s in the spring.

2017: I graduated and I made another short film

2018: I worked on two film shoots and I got promoted at work

2019: I stayed in touch with friends I made on a film shoot, and I got a boyfriend

 16. What was your favorite movie that came out this year?

2015: The Martian

2016: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

2017: Coco

2018: A Star Is Born

2019: Rocketman

 17. Fill in the blank: In 2016/17/18/19/20 I will ____________.

2015: Get the confidence back that I had in the fall

2016: Graduate college

2017: Start looking for film jobs

2018: Find myself

2019: Find a new job

 18. If you could fly anywhere in the world in 2016/17/18/19/20, where would you go?

2015: Italy, and I plan to!

2016: London, and I plan to

2017: Scotland or Ireland, and I don’t have any plans to

2018: Maybe that Israel birthright thing

2019: Maybe Ireland or Amsterdam

 19. What was your biggest regret of 2015/16/17/18/19?

2015: Worrying about the future when I had something good rather than just enjoying it

2016: Not trying enough in making friends and making the most out of it

2017: Maybe not getting quite enough out of college

2018: Forgetting or never quite learning how to work hard. That and not asking a cute guy out in time

2019: Not buying that moonstone necklace

 20. Do you think you’ll be having a better 2016/17/18/19/20 than 2015/16/17/18/19?

2015: I hope so

2016: I hope so

2017: I hope so

2018: I hope so and I think so

2019: I sure hope so

21. Did you make any new friends this year? Lose any friends?

2015: I got closer with some friends :)

2016: I made some new band and film friends. One of my friends from freshman year died.

2017: I almost lost a friend but now we seem to be friends again. I also made some new ones

2018: I made some new ones, and kinda stopped being friends with some of my old roommates

2019: I think I got closer to some friends

22. What was the biggest adventure of the last year?

2015: Hawaii, I think

2016: Studying abroad

2017: Moving out and starting to adult

2018: The film shoots

2019: Dating my boyfriend

23. Did you get cake on your birthday? Presents? What you wanted?

2015: Yeah I went to Vegas which was cool! Got cake and alcohol and presents

2016: I did not get cake but I got IHOP. I got presents, and the football team won the game that day sending us to the PAC 12 Championship

2017: I got pancakes, presents, and maybe I’m starting to get what I wanted?

2018: I got chocolate mousse and presents and I didn’t even know what I wanted

2019: I got cake and presents including one thing I wanted

24. How much did you change this year? What’s different about you?

2016: Not too much has changed but I think I’m prettier, more confident, braver, and value bravery more.

2016: I’m lazier, gained back the weight that I lost last year, and lost some of the confidence from last year. Wow…

2017: I’m not a student anymore

2018: I maybe lost some of my hope in my love life and felt more set in my ways

2019: I don’t have as much FOMO but I’m also getting more frustrated with my life

CONFESSIONS

Bold the statements that are true (2015) and cross out (2016) and italicize (2017) and I’m running out of formats so CAPS (2018) and *star (2019)

In the year 2015/2016/2017/2018/2019 I confess that I….

KISSED SOMEONE I HAVE NEVER KISSED BEFORE. *DID SOMETHING I REGRET. *Painted a picture. *Dyed my hair. Got a new haircut I thought I’d never get before. Wrote a poem. Graduated from High School. Graduated from College. Applied for Graduate School. RAN A MILE. Ate much healthier. Ended toxic friendships. *GAINED A NEW FRIEND. Gained a new best friend. *Visited a foreign country. *LIED. *HAD A FIGHT WITH MY PARENTS. *HAD A SECRET/KEPT A SECRET. Realized my homosexuality. REALIZED MY BISEXUALITY. (OR AT LEAST QUESTIONED IT) Realized my pansexuality. Realized my asexuality. *Broke a promise. *Slept under the stars. *STAYED UP TILL SUNRISE. *PUSHED SOMEONE AWAY. *Got in a fight. SLEPT WITH SOMEONE OTHER THAN MY SIGNIFICANT OTHER. *ATTENDED A PARTY. Got dumped. Got a new piercing/tattoo. Learned that I wasn’t cis gender. Drank underage/used illegal substances. *ATTENDED A CONCERT. *ATTENDED A MUSICAL. *TRAVELED TO ANOTHER CITY. *Broke someone’s heart. *Hiding something from someone. *MADE SOMEONE’S DAY. Cheated on a test/homework. Physically cheated on my significant other. *Emotionally cheated on my significant other. Quit a job. GOT A NEW JOB. Learned to hate someone I thought I never would. Learned to be more patient. Saw the supermoon. SAW THE METEOR SHOWER.

[lebootae]

Barista | Jimin x Reader | fluff

When you get drunk and bump into the cute barista aka that annoying boy you know from college aka that hot kid you’d totally bang..

✎ Quick warning to anyone called Chelsea or Cassandra (or both, why not), you might want to keep an extra name nearby to really feel the story.

"Chels- hey, now you're not even trying, buddy."

Jimin only smirked at you as he spoke his next words laced in faux sweetness. "Have a nice day, Chelsea."

You only rolled your eyes before walking out, coffee in hand. As hot as he was, Park Jimin was an infuriating little bastard. Emphasis on little.

You both went to the same college, took some of the same subjects. At first you thought he was adorable, with his eye smile and all, until you ended up having to do a project together. That smirking bastard literally did almost nothing for the project, yet still got equal marks as you. And it didn't help that he worked at the cafe you always visited for your morning coffee. You had to see his unfairly beautiful face every morning before you've had your morning coffee. And to make matters worse, he was an absolute jerk. Every morning, he'd spell your name wrong on the coffee mug. Every. Single. Morning. And you've been in the same Physics class for 3 years!

You'd start getting your coffee elsewhere, or by a different barista, but you had to admit. The guy could make a good cup of coffee. You needed that to get your cranky down and fake smiles up every morning.

Later that day, you were sitting in the library trying to complete an assignment when you got a text from your roommate/best friend, Jisoo.

Jisoos: bich there's a party tonight at Taehyung's. You down?

You: hell yas, sign me up!

The assignment could wait. You were getting wasted tonight. Ah, to be young.

▲ ▼ ▲ ▼ ▲ ▼ ▲ ▼ ▲ ▼

"I see cute guy. I leave you. See you back at the dorms!" Jisoo yelled over the deafening music before disappearing into the crowd of drunk college students.

"Thanks Jisoo, real nice of you." You mumbled to yourself. Oh well, since you were here already, it was time for shots.

More shots than you remember later, you had achieved the goal for the night - you were wasted. Walking - well, stumbling - around the dance floor, you bumped into a bunch of people before being pulled by the arm to a nearby wall, away from the crowd. A voice yelled into your ear, one you knew too well. "How drunk are you?"

You squinted to focus on the face in front of you. There was a look of concern in Jimin's brown orbs, seemingly foggy, probably from alcohol he had earlier as well.

"A lot, maybe." You replied. If that little shit didn't look good enough already, he looked extra fine tonight, dressed in a button down and pants, a sheen of sweat visible on his forehead from the warm surroundings.

"A lot? I'd say it's way more than a lot, Y/N." he slurred. Yeah, he was drunk too.

You rolled your eyes at him. "You can say my name drunk and can't spell it right sober? Nice, Jimin, nice. Takes talent to be that big of an asshole."

He threw his head back and laughed, the sound a melodic tune to your ears. Good looking, and with the voice of an angel, yet an absolute dick. Who allowed this?

He put his forearms on the walls beside your head and leaned in towards your ear. "You know, you're kinda cute, Y/N."

That got you mad. "Kinda cute?! What do you mean kinda cute, you prick?! I'm as hot as you, you fine specimen!" Yes, drunk you was very confident.

"Really now, am I hot?" He asked with a lopsided grin on his face.

You gave his an 'are you serious' look. "Bitch, stop acting. You know you're smoking hot, you piece of shit!"

"Let me rephrase that, then." He spoke again. "Do you think I'm hot, Y/N?"

"Um, yes? Hello? Have you ever seen a mirror? Your beautiful face would be so hard not to just grab and kiss, had you not had an attitude as stinky as a skunk."

He laughed at that again. "A skunk, huh? That's new. But you want to grab my face and kiss it?"

"Yes? Like, your lips look so soft? And your hair! Why do you deserve such beautiful hair, you bastard? What do you do to it?"

"It's called remembering to wash it, darling. And you wouldn't mind if I kissed you right now?"

"I mean, you act like you own the world or something, but no, i won't m-" Before you could finish that sentence, Jimin's plump lips came crashing down on your own, silencing you, and holy shit, they were definitely as soft as they looked. And boy, could he kiss.

His tongue probed into your mouth, and found yours. Massaging your tongue, his hands reached around your waist to pull you closer, your arms automatically crawling up his chest to twine around his neck.

One of his hands traveled up into your hair, massaging your scalp. You moaned out at the feeling, pulling him closer.

He tilts his head, deepening the kiss as his hand traveled from your waist under your shirt to carass your stomach. The feeling of his fingers sent a shiver down your spine, making you jolt when his thumb dipped into your navel.

"Fuck, why does that feel good?" You breathed out, gripping his shoulders. He only chuckled, raking his knuckles back and forth over your skin.

He nipped and licked at your neck, creating red patches on the soft skin, arm back around your bare waist under your shirt. You let your head fall on his shoulder and groaned at the feeling. "Are we getting out of here or what?"

You could feel him smirk against your neck. "As you wish, sweetheart."

▲ ▼ ▲ ▼ ▲ ▼ ▲ ▼ ▲ ▼

It had been a few days since the part at Taehyung's and you were back for your morning coffee.

"Morning." You were greeted by that eye smile you were so used to seeing. You only grunted in response. You. Needed. Your. Coffee.

He placed your usual in front of you, smirking at you again. You picked it up to survey what creative name he came up with this time.

"Casan- are you serious?! Change this right now!" You held out your cup, glaring at him. He laughed before taking it, and scribbling something down. "Here you go."

Taking it, you pecked him on the lips before walking out. A few sips of your coffee later, you looked at your cup to make sure if he really did write your name right. This time instead of a frown, you couldn't stop grinning. He had crossed out 'Cassandra' and written 'Girlfriend' instead.

✎ Eid Mubarak to all my Muslim friends out there! Have a blast this eid!

[withlovekth]

Darkroom (Part One)

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader Genre: artist! taehyung, best friend! jimin, college au, fluff, smut, light angst Contains: swearing, self-toxicity, alcohol (future chapters) Word Count: 1k

Author’s Note: I haven’t updated anything in months but here I am now trying my best. I started to think about this story after having a weird dream about Taehyung and Jimin. And after listening to Panic! at the Disco on repeat for the past week, I was inspired by a bunch of lyrics to start writing again.

A community college kid. Only enough credits to be considered as a second year when it feels like it’s been a billion years. Okay, it’s only been three. But it feels like forever since all I’ve been taking are elective classes. Undecided major, no goals or aspirations. I’m stuck. I’m stuck. I’m stuck.

Click.

The shutter of my borrowed film camera goes off. My best friend glares at me as I mindlessly watch him through the viewfinder.

He frows. “Y/N, I’m trying to study.”

“What?” I smile at him. “I can’t help it. You look so good. The lighting in the library is perfect.” I put the camera down onto the table. “It emphasizes the blonde.” I lean over the table in an attempt to ruffle his hair, but he leans back out of my reach with a smug look on his face. I plop back into my seat. “Too bad this is black and white film.

“You can take my picture later.” He slicks his bangs back. “I’ll make sure to look even better for you.” He winks.

I shudder. “Nah, I want those candid photos.”

“We can take those too.”

“No, no. You can’t know I’m taking your pic. None of that fake candid shit.” I grin.

He rolls his eyes then laughs. “Whatever you say.” He turns his attention back to his laptop.

I rest my chin in my palm as I watch him focus. “It must be nice...” I see him raise an eyebrow without looking away from his notes. “To have a declared major. I guess.” My voice feels small. “Knowing what to do with you life. Knowing where to go.”

He reaches over the table and grabs my hand. “I may have a major, but I have no idea what I’m doing with it or my life.” He thumbs the back of my hand. “It’s okay to not know what to do. None of us really know what we’re doing.”

I interlock our fingers, bringing his hand to my cheek to playfully nuzzle it. “God I love you,” I jokingly bawl, trying to lighten up the mood I had created.

He rolls his eyes again. “I know you do.” He laughs as I continue to dramatically sob into his hand.

Click.

We look at each other. I turn to the source of the sound to find a boy with the same film camera I had held up to his face.

“Jimin,” the boy lowers the camera to reveal a boxy smile.

“Not you too, Taehyung,” Jimin exhales from his nose.

“Oh! You’re that girl who sits in front of my photography class.” He pulls up a chair next to me, brushing off Jimin.

“Mm. I guess that’s why you look kinda familiar.” I try not to make it obvious that I’m trying to analyze his face.

Counting the little moles scattered. His charming uneven eyelids. That square grin. Messy hair. He’s cute.

“Sorry, I don’t really look around the class. I kinda just keep to myself.”

He has such a strong presence. How have I never noticed him before?

“I don’t blame you. You’re always asleep during lecture anyway.”

“Damn Y/N. Called out,” Jimin chimes in.

“Oh, you’re the infamous Y/N, huh? Nice to meet you,” he sticks his hand out. “As you know, I’m Taehyung.”

I grab his hand and shake it, side eyeing Jimin. “Infamous?”

“I’m kidding.” Taehyung shoots me another charming grin. “Jimin’s told me so much cool things about you.”

“Weird. He’s never mentioned you.” I raise in eyebrow.

“He doesn’t?” Taehyung pouts. “Why not Chim Chim?”

Jimin shrugs. “You just never come up in conversation...”

“Oh? But you never stop talking about Y/N—”

Jimin hastily covers Taehyung’s mouth with his hand. “Shut up.”

Taehyung rips Jimin off his mouth. “Hey Y/N, tell me. Does Jimin close the curtains whenever you’re over at his place?”

“Now that you think of it, they usually are. But I don’t know if that’s just a coincidence? Why do you ask?”

“Just wondering...” He gets up and gathers his things. “Anyway I’ll see you in class,” he points a finger gun at me. “See ya later, neighbor.” He waves to Jimin before leaving.

“And don’t develop that picture Taehyung!” Jimin calls out to him. We watch him wave again without turning back around.

I wait for him to disappear behind the double doors. “He’s your neighbor? Since when?” My head snaps to Jimin. “And he calls you Chim Chim? Only your mom calls you that! How long have you known Taehyung?”

I don’t know why I’m suddenly so curious about him, but now I can’t stop thinking about him. I want to get to know him.

“He’s lived next door for as long as I can remember. Our parents are friends so we used to have playdates all the time. He just went to the other schools so that’s why you’ve never ran into him.”

“And you’ve never mentioned him because?”

“Because he’s bad news.”

“You say that about every guy I meet.” It’s my turn to roll my eyes.

“This time is different, okay? I know him personally. There’s a reason I’ve never introduced you two.”

“Aw, are you scared he’s going to take me away from you?” I tease him, pinching his mochi-like cheeks.

He holds me by the wrists to rip me off him. “Hey! That’s already happened with that asshole, toxic ex of yours—”

“We don’t talk about him. He’s dead to me.” I cut him off.

He just stares at me.

“Okay I get it.” I put my hands up in defeat. “But what’s so bad about Taehyung?”

“There’s nothing really wrong with it, but he just sleeps around, alright?”

“What? Do you think I’m just going to have sex with him? He’ll have to wine and dine me first,” I smirk.

“Y/N...”

“Okay. Okay. But what else?”

He pauses, his lips forming into a line. “He’ll just hurt you then make art of you when he’s done with you. He uses his flings as art inspiration. I don’t want you to just be another sloppy painting or a doodle in a sketchbook. Just don’t get too close to him. Got it?”

Side Note: I’ve been writing for a creative writing class but I finally found the time to write for fun/myself. Hopefully this story isn’t as toxic as (the now deleted) The Last Train. I hope writing this story doesn’t trigger me and drag me to hell and back. I’m trying to be better to myself.

[taeyongtown]

D-15: Where’s my Mistletoe? - Jisung Fic

Day 1 of 15, NCT christmas writing countdown.

summary: Renjun invites you to a dumb Christmas party, and you only go for a chance to kiss your crush, Jisung Park.

word count: 1.7k

genre: fluff, semi-angst, christmas (taeyongtown’s christmas countdown 2017)

A/N: I haven’t written something since August. its dec 10 today. Anyway’s i haven’t proof-read this, and feedback and constructive criticism is always appreciated 🌟

christmas countdown masterlist | masterlist

You didn’t even want to be at this dumb Christmas party anyways, but ofc Renjun dragged you along anyways. Well okay he didn’t drag you along, more like guilted you into coming.

“Oh Y/N, you’re my favourite underclassman, and I do so much for you!”

“Renjun when have you ever—”

“like remember that time you got detention and I got you out of it? Or that time you would’ve FAILED that fundraising project if I hadn’t bought all the left over cupcakes or when—”

“Renjun I don’t even go to your school and besides he’s gonna be there—”

“and you’re telling me you won’t even come ??????? Jeno and I didn’t DIE for this disrespect”

As soon as you walked in, Renjun had given you a hug and greeted you warmly, and you know, you felt like it’d be fine, what’s the worst that could happen? But then, he flashed you his pure boy smile, and disappeared into the throng of student. Yes, throng. As in huge crowd. It seemed like at least half of SOPA was here.

Is Taeyong alive, and how did Renjun and Jeno fit in so many kids into their dorms ???

You already weren’t super close to the rest of dream, and really, you had only expect them to invite like 15-20 kids max, and here you were, stuck with at least 50 or 60 kids giggling and talking and kissing under the FIVE MILLION MISTLETOES SLUNG EVERYONE

Whos fucking idea was this ??

Yup, taeyong is definitely not okay rn

Take a shitty college party, replace the alcohol with hot chocolate and like fucking Gatorade, and replace the making out with giggling under mistletoes and that’s the hell that you were in rn

So here you are, sulking in the corner, not only bc you were surrounded by a bunch of infants, but also bc Haechan and Chenle were screaming with a karaoke station, and Mark was dying in a corner with at least a dozen girls holding mistletoes over him as Renjun laughed, and mostly bc Jeno had tried to get you to kiss a boy who wasn’t Jisung Park.

Yes, you liked Jisung Park.

While you had known Renjun for a really long time, and Chenle for around a year or so, you had only really met the rest of the boys a few months ago

Renjun often used Chenle’s house as a place to tutor you, as Chenle was the only one who lived outside the dorms

While you weren’t super close with Chenle, he was like an acquaintance who you didn’t mind

So one day, a few days after school had begun, and when Renjun was done most of his main promotions for We Young, y’all were at Chenle’s

Renjun said he was going to get busier and so it would be good to look at the syllabus to plan out when you would need the most help in tutoring

God bless that boy he’s so sweet

And it’s all calm and quite with no one around

Until Chenle bursts open the front door, with Jeno and Jisung marching behind him

They’re all a little shook, but recover quickly, especially Jeno

Ofc you knew who they were but you hadn’t acc met them, save Chenle

While Chenle sniggers in the background Jeno approaches you professionally “Oh Y/N, I’ve heard quite a bit about you, it’s lovely to finally meet you!”

Renjun puts him in a headlock.

Jisung, however, is extremely quiet and just makes eye contact and smiles at your from across the room smh

And I guess that’s why you kind of fell for him?

Bc he was around your age and he gave you the soft fluttery feeling that you had barely experienced before ?

Anyways, wow I rambled of course Renjun knew the minute y’all left, he was your childhood friend after all

And what Renjun knew, Jeno probably knew too.

And a small, just a tinyyyy part of you had been looking forward to this party

Because you really, really wanted to see Jisung Park.

But no, Jisung was sitting in the living room, wearing some dumb reindeer antlers,,,, giggling with a few of his classmates, some boy, some girls— most of whom were at least 7 hundred and 89 times prettier than you :/ uGh

AnD suddenly,,,,, you had an amazing idea :- )))))) Putting on your best smile, you went out to go search for Renjun.

You find him in the kitchen, refilling snacks.

“Ahhh! Y/N, I hope you’re having a good time !! See, I told you it would be fun!”

You smiled through gritted teeth :- DDDDD

“Yeah, about that! Could I borrow your laptop? I have a huge history project due, and my partner keeps asking me to Skype her bc apparently she messed up :/”

Renjun looked worried, but smiled

“Yeah, it’s in my room, feel free to use it… you remember my passcode right?”

You grinned and hugged him tight, as if the best thing in the world had just happened

“Yes I do! Thank you so much !!!” you scrambled, running out to find his room

Were you going to call a friend? No. You guys had finished the project last week. Were you going to take a nap? Yes, of course you were. Renjun rly wouldn’t mind, he’d be a little disappointed, but he wouldn’t mind, you’d had sleepovers before. It was 8pm right now, and if you set your alarm for 9:30, no one would even notice.

You hit set, and before you knew it, you were asleep.

Except you slept through your alarm. Not by a lot, just maybe thirty minutes. But it was enough for you to be shaken awake by Jaemin, a slightly amused expression on his face. You weren’t close to him, but you didn’t mind him, he was really nice.

Your eyes widened at the site of him, and you scrambled to get up. “Relax,” he giggled, sitting down beside you.

“This is about Jisung isn’t it?”

“Huh?”

“your crush”

“What no— I mean yes I like him— but no! wait what are you implying” you gush

Jaemin laughed again

“You probably wouldn’t hate this party as much as you do rn if it weren’t for Jisung”

you :///// “I guess,,,,,,,,,,,,”

“I say, just give it a shot, it almost Christmas, miracles do happen”

You throw a pillow at him

None the less, you grumbled and get up, tidying yourself in the mirror beside Renjun’s desk. You follow Jaemin towards the living room, and gasp. There were barely a dozen kids left, non including dream. You turn towards Jaemin, “what happened?!” “Most kids at SOPA are either trainees or some type of creative connoisseurs, we all need our beauty sleep Y/N!” Jaemin exclaimed before waltzing off.

You see Jisung sitting beside a few kids talking animatedly, but he himself was on his phone. You decide to take Jaemin’s advice, and go sit beside him. What’s the worst that could happen? “Hey!” you say, plopping down. Jisung looks a little shookt, but he smiles down at you, straightening up. “Hey Y/N! How long have you been here?!” “The whole time,” you say bashfully. His jaw drops a little, “What! No way, I mean you should’ve at least said hi :/ you have no idea how bored I was, everyone’s leaving!” he gestured around him, and that at the kids beside him who got up and walked towards Jeno, probably to say goodbye. You giggle, a little surprised, yet extremely content, at how bubbly and friendly he was being.

The conversation would’ve continued great, except…

“YO! Y/N” Jaemin yelled your name from across the room. You saw him smiling like an angel, and you saw, beside him, Donghyuck smirking like the devil. Donghyuck slung something at you and Jisung, which lodged itself in Jisung’s dumb antlers.

A mistletoe.

This was NOT the Christmas miracle that you were expecting. But maybe it’s the one that you deserve,,, ???

You looked around the room bewildered, looking anywhere but Jisung. You eyes settled on Renjun, expecting some help, but instead he just smiled into his hot chocolate. kermit looking ass. You narrowed your eyes as you realized it was probably his plan.

Donghyuck whooped, “GET IT JISUNG!” You looked down and shoved your face in your hands. Mark giggled, and him and Jeno yelled “Maknae on top!” “That’s so old…” Jisung mumbled, and when you snuck a glance at his face, it was bright red, even in the dim evening lights. Sensing you looking, he glanced up at your eyes, holding his eye contact for no longer than .25 seconds.

“Y/N…” he mumbled, his voice small and childlike.

“Jisung…” you replied back, a slightly shy smile on your face.

“I guess we have to Y/N,”

“I guess so,”

“May I?” He asked, finally looking up into your eyes. You nodded, your eyes fluttering close.

You felt him leaning in, and you did too, for what felt like a year. Maybe it wouldn’t have taken so long if y’all hadn’t been sitting a literal foot apart. You felt him place his lips on yours, his puckered and stiff. But it didn’t matter !! you were kissing Jisung Park !! your long time crush !! your face looks like that gif of haechan when jisung calls him ugly u kno the one. You leant in a little bit more towards him, both of you unsure of what you were doing, you trying to move your lips.

It was over before it even started, but before it was over, you felt a loud click go off. “My badddddd!” Chenle yelled, fake laughing, a camera in his hands. There was a brief silence, and then cheers. “Y/N I TOLD U CHRISTMAS MIRACLES HAPPEN! GET IT!” Jaemin yelled and you look at him, eyes wide in horror. “NA JAEMIN!” You threw another pillow at him.

Jisung ran his hand threw his hair, shy and looking like a baby chick. You leant forward and untangled the mistletoe from his antlers. He gasped, breath held.

“Jisung, I was wondering if you want to go on a date this weekend?” You asked him, looking directly into his eyes, a sudden wave of confidence over taking you. Jisung blushed, his eyes still wide, his face redder than ever.

“I would love to, Y/N”

[makeademia]

The video that got my [spam] YouTube Channel Almost Banned **not clickbait**

(Comparing 1970′s College Music Scenes- Disco and Rock)

But yeah, stealing an entire theme song (and turning a project in late trying to preserve the least relevant part of the video ahaha) is fun. In my opinion, it was worth it. This is in no way implying that it’s good, though, so watch at the risk of your own valued time.

-AC

Transcript Below:

[Intro music]

Voiceover:

Ah, college.

Just like Hollywood romanticized high school with Grease and Dazed and Confused, I feel like college was a little bit romanticized today. In movies, all you saw were people drinking and partying and listening to really cool music but it turns out today, college costs an arm, a leg, and a kidney to go to. And there’s a lot more stress…to put it lightly.

So, what would it be like to just chill out and listen to music in the 70’s?

Upon doing some research, I found out that 1970’s colleges were dominated by two different music scenes: rock and disco.

And in this vlog, I’ll try my best to describe each one and I’ll even include a couple of anecdotes from my 1970’s parents…if they cooperate, but stay tuned to find out if they do!

Disco:

Happy Thursday, everyone.

So, I didn’t get the memo that my professor canceled class today and I’m here so there’s nothing left to do besides take over his room and teach you guys about 70’s music. So, let’s get started.

So, first I’d like to start off with the properties of disco. So, these were played at clubs and it was really played at any type of party. There was an occasion to listen to Disco. 

And, it was really influenced by genres that came before it so you kind of got the Funk elements that played into Disco as well as Jazz. 

And many of the songs had dance moves. Also, I believe it was illegal for people of the same gender to dance together but that got outlawed with the Stone Wall Riots, I believe, I haven’t taken history in a while. 

But, you had lots of sexual revolution—everything was very “do you”. 

Most of the songs were wild and upbeat. Electronic elements were quintessential to the funkiness or grooviness [groove, whoops] of Disco music.

 It kind of threw away the pre-conceived notions of what “good” music is. You’re not appraising Disco. It’s more of what’s there? And does it fit the setting? And that’s kind of where the occasion comes in again.

Rock:

So, let's start off with Rock. 

Keep in mind that Rock certainly isn’t anything new. It was very popular in the 60’s. Like, the 70’s wasn’t the “decade” of Rock. There’s almost a subgenre of Rock that became really popular called Acid Rock and also Psychedelic Rock. And there are tons more that fall into this category, but I’m just generally going to refer to it as Rock.

As opposed to Disco that took elements of different genres to make a new genre, it was more so the continuation of a genre that was already thriving. 

Also different from Disco, the way you heard Rock was mainly through the radio. So, in a way, it was reaching the same amount of people, just through a different medium. 

Unlike disco, there’s not an occasion to listen to Rock unless you’re going to a concert or something. 

70’s music really pushed people to think. It wouldn’t explicitly call out the social message. It was more to promote creativity and individualism within the listeners. 

Also, you had tons of different instruments used. Plus, elements of music that made it seem like they were edited. 

Even the softer side of rock had the same elements as heavier rock that came to fruition in the 70’s. It had this explosion. It was unpredictable and it was really creative.

 I will get into that more. It’ll make more sense, so I look forward to that. In the meantime, I am going to get into the similarities.

Rock & Disco:

They all have undertones of inclusion. You can be your own person and not only will I accept it but it’s something I want to celebrate. 

So, in that way, it was all very fluid. It was fluid musically bringing in electronic elements.

The 70’s did have people who were distrustful of the government just because of all the drama that went on in the 60’s, Watergate, and whatnot. You had the government and “The man” no longer relevant in music. It was its own degree of rejection.

Also, I can’t go without mentioning this—drugs! Those drugs prospectively being alcohol and cocaine for Disco and as we all can guess, Rock definitely did have a stronghold in stoner culture and acid trips, that’s something they took from the 60’s.

So, public consumption of alcohol and cocaine is still looked down upon. This was still very underground and it was not societally accepted but it did play into the music because the music is so fast and energetic and, you know, when have you seen that in other decades? 

And you’re with people and you have the free love thing going on and you can do whatever you want. It encourages your own choices and these are some of the choices.

Last thing we have here is young people, which is why I did this topic. Who makes stuff cool? College kids.

I will bring in examples of my parents. Disclaimer, they aren’t cool anymore but back in the day my parents definitely vibed with these things.

Mom & Dad Profiles:

So, contrary to what my retro baby pictures and my superb teaching on this topic may lead you to believe, I was not nor have I ever been alive in the 70s.

So instead, I brought you the more credible Tammy and Craig who were alive in the 70s.

Although they were merely teenagers at the time, I think they can still give you the spark notes

of the spark notes of how the music of the liberated college student trickled down to them.

Mom Interview:

A: So, this is my mother, Tammy

T: Are you still there?

A: Oh my God, we’re off to a great start

Q: How do you remember the rise of Disco?

T: Yeah, it was really popular when the movie Saturday Night Fever came out

A: Is that what made the term Saturday Night Fever?

T: Yeah. Well, I don’t know. I didn’t write that movie.

A:…Okay.

T: I didn’t like it, though. I didn’t like Disco music. Although, I did like that Bee Gees album.

A: What Bee Gees album? Well, actually—no. I don’t care. Um—

Q: What turned you off from Disco?

T: [cackles in English] I like more laid back songs where you can sing to the words and understanding the song more than getting up and dancing and more than, you know, being happy and peppy.

A: And you do not consider yourself a peppy person?

T: No

Q: When would you listen to Rock music?

A: Out with friends, hangin’ out in the neighborhood.

Q: Were other people this polarized on what genres they liked?

T: No, I don’t think that they were necessarily at odds with each other but, I mean, they did kind of stay on separate sides, you know. 

Q: Did your school band ever use Rock or Disco in their routines?

T: Um, the band would play like Rock n Roll Music

A: And that’s the school bands?

T: Yeah and we would dance to it or twirl to it

A: Okay, but not Disco?

T: No, not so much Disco.

Q: What’s your fondest memory of 70’s music?

T: I just remember sitting in my room a lot and just listening to album after album. I had like eighty albums.

Q: So rock was personal and interpersonal?

A: So with Rock it was more about like intimate connections with your friends and-

T: Yeah, and how the music related to your life. A lot of the music you could relate to your own life. And concerts were big too. As a teenager, I remember lots of concerts. That was the big thing.

A: Any other insights you have?

T: Nope

A: Would you like to be dismissed now?

T: Yeah [cackles]

Dad Interview: 

Q: How did you hear different kinds of 70’s music?

C: That's what you listen to it on my college radio stations or nightclubs, it was when you had stadium concerts, which had like pyrotechnics. Um, kinda like Led Zeppelin.

Q: What made people like these genres?

C: So you had kinda the vanilla you can think of it as almost like squares music on the Top 40 and then he had kind of people that were looking for something different. Even the disco was people looking for something different. Disco was kind of like the nightclub music but it was all associated with beauty and glamour and, you know, high fashion

Q: So there was some narcissism among Disco listeners?

C: Well, there were definitely in the ideas the Disco and even in Glam Rock there was narcissism but I think there are some of the opposite—you had the disenfranchised, the people that didn't feel like they didn’t belong like every generation had. I think it's always driven by youth; they're looking for a new sound or they're, you know, what they're playing on the radio doesn't express their thoughts and stuff but I think there are some people that get left behind and that just widens the chasm between the haves and the have-nots. 

Q: Is this how the peaceful attitudes of the 60’s dissolved?

 C :I think maybe you still had some of the innocence after the psychedelic 60s and and the British Invasion. Remember, back in the day, the 70s Beatles was broken up. You know, that kind of disillusioned people with-you kind of got this groovy, you know, a sense of getting along Well, yeah there's that but you know that not everyone identified with that groovy, happy, you now—loving feeling.

Q: Was it like this for Rock and Disco?

C: Because it became splintered, the majority of mass American people, you know, would listen. But those into Disco would never want to be around anything with Punk music, you know, that was dirty, that was raw trash to them, you know.

Q: What cool things arose from 70’s Rock?

C: And you also had the idea the develop of concept albums, you know, that it wasn't a bunch of singles on an album.

A: Like Pink Floyd?

C: Pink Floyd! Exactly! Like, Led Zeppelin, you know, I remember it being a big thing with Stairway to Heaven because it was like 17 minutes long and it was finally played on the radio. You also had this blissful lack of technical skills or development in the Punk movement. You know, they couldn’t play any instrument and just wailed away in and yelled and made noise and, you know, that it became a music genre.

Q: How was Rock made popular?

C: You couldn’t just say “Let's do it!”—no! You know, you had to go out to a bar or a concert to listen to music and then you would get to know it. You'd buy it, you know, an album and you go to a house party or something slam-dancing at the house party and play the music until your speakers blew. And it’s the same way with Progressive Rock into New Wave. Now that was really ushered in by the technological development of the synthesizer. You know, they started having a band without a guitar, which was unheard of back then. 

Q: How was Disco different and how was it similar?

C: There was a lot of sentiment about it, about Disco. Before then, you know, you couldn't you could hear but it really was pretty mindless music. It was just dance music.

Q: Was disco popular for non-club goers?

You also had, you know, people that weren't old enough to go out to clubs and stuff. They would start to listen to their older brothers or sisters’ albums, you know.

Q: How did the drug of choice for the listeners of each genre come to be?

C: So I think that's more symptomatic of the age and the partying and stuff, which drug in particular they did and how they did it or stuff like that, yeah. That might have been more based on the type of music it like ecstasy and rings go kind of go together. It wasn’t like they started doing raves because they were doing ecstasy was but it went along with the music and being out partying, you know, drugs and drinking are, you know, right or wrong, are gonna be a part of going to college or high school, you know.

Q: Why did the 70’s become known for these genres specifically?

C: Rock and Disco where desired have fun, the desire to party, the desire to share something with friends or, you know, significant other or trying to find a significant other…

[Music and Credits]