#gods mad lab carlson

[gods-mad-lab-shitposts]

What was said: "Be Gay, Do Crimes"

What they heard:

Terrance: "Your gay, Do Crimes"

Anti: "Your existence is a Crime"

God: "Not being gay is a Crime"

Jesus: "Help the gays do Crimes"

President: "Your gay husband does Crimes"

Carlson: “god is going to start some shit again”

[no26gainbridgehonda]

.... it is seriously taking all of my self control not to skip everything for the next three days and brainstorm and write a GML fanfic-

Gods mad lab is such fandom material please someone help me

[thatscrazyrandom]

Thomas Sanders started something that Tiktok is only worsening for me.

Why do I ship so many people with themselves?

It's a problem honestly.

[a-lonely-goldfish]

God Learns Ships

(No beta, we die like real men)

"Carlson!" The room was quite so perfectly quite before the literal embodiment of unstoppable power came in the room. Carlson never quit understood God. God had all control, power, and knowledge at the tips of his fingers yet he was a totally dumb ass. It kind of made sense how god was a totally dumb ass, for better content.

"Carlson are you even listening?" God winded once again computer in hand. Being snapped out of Carlson's inner dialog he looked up from his work, it was less work and more of tutoring humans until something interest happened. "what is it?"

"Not even a hello? Someone's moody have you been hanging out with Lucy? Anyways do you know what a ship is?"

"that was way to many questions, slow down". This was another thing he didn't quit understand about God at first. You would think God would command respect, be the type of person who could get what they want with a glance. But if anyone was picking it up by now god was not that at all. Who ever wrote the bible sucked at their job.

"first of all, i don't care. Secondly I haven't seeing that theirs no breaks from work in heaven. And I thought you remembered what a ship was, you were the one who made them to carry diseasea ."

"No no no, I'm pretty sure that's not what it means" God puzzled shoving the computer in Carlson's face. On the screen there was some type of sharing site. Some place where one can share content and ideas seeing at the top of the screen there was a user name and icon. The icon was of some green figure with a blob on top of it, oh wait that's Shrek with Danny Davito throwing in back on him.

"how did you get a computer?"

"I'm God"

Oh right

He looked at the computer again. There user seemed to of posted some ligature. It seemed like it was meant for simple intellect. At the end of the post there was art of two humans holding hands while looking into the sun.

The post didn't make much sense. At the top it read "I made some art of InkTober!!?!?? Uwu. I tried very hard :))) today's prompt was favorite ship and hand holding! So i did insufferable husband's! owo" Then there was the fan art of what was the "insufferable husband's". The name sounded like a comedy special on free form from some single women about her cats. Under the text its self was the art.

Carlson could now see why it was confusing. What's this site? What's InkTober? Is it a knew cult? Who are these insufferable husband's? Who wed them? What was a ship? Why was it called that? why do humans hold hands? whats an Uwu, actually its probably something cursed”

"any ways this human was talking about a ship, but not the disease kind. Just look at it"

"I have since you shoved it in my fac-"

"Okay Jesus I get it". And on que "yes Father?". "Can't you see were doing something here? why do you always have to come when somethings important". You would think after God saying Jesus so many times he would learn not to say it since it summoned "the biggest disappointment ever".God could do many things, but having parenting skills was not one. Poor Jesus. Carlson probably taught and supported him more then God did in the short time he knew him.

"Wait he might know something. Jesus do you know what this is?" Carlson gestured to the computer.

"the people? No I do not know them. Are you doing the thing again we're you make everyone I know try and murder me.

"No you fool I mean what a ship is. Like in this context." God became more agitated by the second

"oh I don't know how to read you disabled me from reading because you didn't want me to interact with people so i would become an outcast to society"

"ughhh you're so annoying" with a snap of Gods fingers Jesus could read again.

After scanning the post for a minute Jesus figured out the jigsaw puzzle. "I believe they mean ship as in relationship, and the husbands are the ship."

"and InkTober?" Carlson was amazed how he didn't realize that sooner, but ashamed of him self for being on the same brain cell as God.

"Oh it seems like a type of festive tradition"

"Carlson write that down, I want a holiday after me were people just draw me"

"its not like people do that already, by the way thanks Jesus" Carlson was probably the only one who dare thank Jesus in Gods presents.

"okay now scram, you're upsetting my vibe by just being here". Just like that, Jesus was gone.

"oh so god why were you looking that up?"

"oh well because apparently someone shipped us"

"wait what-". Then it happened. God pressed the back button to show smutty smutty fanart of Carlson and God on the same cursed sight. How and why where running through Carlson's head. Why him? Why can't the world spare him. He knew he needed to put his eyes in bleach ASAP.

Carlson tried to move his head in an attempt to not take in anything else, but it was to late. His brain already memorized everything in exact detail to haunt him for life. The art itself was him, Carlson was sinning in sin with sin. sin with more sin under sin. AND THEIR WAS GOD SINNING. 

Carlson was actually going to throw up.

“HOLY SHIT WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, JESUS”

 On que “You needed me Carlson-”

“LOOK AWAY BEFORE ITS TO LATE”

Hope you enjoyed, dont forget to subscribe to Gods Mad Lab of TIkToK

(also i believe this is the community's first fanfic as of may 21 2020)

[pocket-lizart]

Oh Boy, it's Father's Day. Time to try earning the non-existing appreciation from your father.

[beingrobingivesmemagic]

May I introduce you to God's Mad Lab?

Ok Bible headcanon that adam and eve weren't kicked out of the garden for eating an apple, it was more of a "baby birds gotta leave the nest" thing

God's basically that parent with a fully grown kid who's like sweet child you have to get a job and move out i need my space

[lifblogs]

It is an absolute fucking crime that there isn’t a God’s Mad Lab fandom.

God’s a pretentious asshole who doesn’t get morals because HE IS GOD, he is EVERYTHING

His ex-boyfriend is Adam (who’s allergic to apples)

Gabriel used to work for God, but he wanted to do soul-searching or something, so he hired a human intern

Human intern is named Loki, but because his father’s name is Carl, God calls him Carlson, and Carlson does not try to correct him

(It has been hinted at that Carlson is a Norse demi-god)

Carlson willingly let himself die while physically in Heaven so he could have angelic powers and forget his human life

Jesus is the son of an abusive father (aka, the guy with a capital G who wants to be called daddy at times) who regularly sends him down to Earth in order to make him go away, and usually a lot of shit happens, like death, and screaming

Jesus has no idea what sex is, and his version of Netflix n’ Chill is sitting on the couch with a refridgerator, but he had a massive three-nippled, four-armed angelic/demonic partner anyway

Jesus is dating the Anti-Christ (I watched 121 episodes, so at this point I can’t even remember if they’re just friends, but Jesus is the only one that can communicate with him)

God kept the Anti-Christ in a basement

When God isn’t insulting Carlson he regularly hits on him and tries to seduce him... despite not having genitalia (he just steals Carlson’s)

Carlson is regularly called weird things like “slut,” and “butterflakes”

Carlson is losing his mind and feels empty inside and doesn’t know what’s happening anymore or what existence truly is, but he gives great advice

Lucifer’s in permanent timeout in The Pit, and God just lied that he doesn’t know how to get him out

God thinks Lucifer’s new name is “Santa”

God wants to get with Mother Nature

Mother Nature wants to get with Lucifer

Lucifer wants to get with Mother Nature

Sometimes God wants to do an Apocalypse team-up type situation with Lucifer

God regularly drinks blood and feasts on hearts, so to answer an interviewer, no, he is not vegan

God is going to war against Hell over a cake

[gods-mad-lab-shitposts]

God, on the phone: hey can I borrow 4000 dollars?

Carlson: why would you need 4000 dollars?

God: for an escape room....

Carlson: what type of escape room cost 4000 dollars?

God:.....

Carlson:.....

God:.....

Carlson:.....

God:.....

Carlson:.....

God:......Jail

[gods-mad-lab-shitposts]

Carlson: Do you remember what God said before?

Terrance: That it doesn't count as stripping if someone doesn't pay you

Carlson: I wish I actually forgot him saying that

[gods-mad-lab-shitposts]

Claire: My boyfriend's too tall for me to kiss him on the lips. What do I do?

Terrance: Punch him in the stomach, whe he doubles over in pain take what's yours.

Anti: Tackle him to the ground

God: Dump him

Jesus: just ask him to bend down?