#god. agatha is so fascinating

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 4 part 3

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

Lilia is bickering with Jen in episode 7. she turns around and SEES ALICE, WHO WAS KILLED IN EPISODE 5

alice, don't try to save agatha! but she's whisked ever further back to episode 2 before she can finish the sentence. imagine having the power of communicating with the past but it's never enough to warn them. seeing the dead and talking to them, knowing what's going to come next. and you wonder why she chose exile and solitude.

meanwhile agatha has collected her wits long enough to decide what her short term strategy with rio is gonna be: keep her distracted, isolate her from the others, keep her away from billy. see how she takes a moment to focus and get into character? she knows rio is about to follow her like a moth to a flame

just going on a trip with my best gal pals and a random teen boy, nothing to see here!!!! and agatha knows that rio knows that she's lying. hello, rio is PERFECTLY aware that there's no Road out there capable of magicking her into a glam rock sex den. but maybe, just maybe, agatha can keep her focused on something else. honestly it would be such a waste to not put all that combined cleavage to good use!

there she was, having a chat with sharon down in the dirt, and you guys went and dragged her up. like perfect morons. I love how she brought the flower along and it ended up working really well with the outfit

oh, rio knows. she knows everything.

and agatha SHOOTS UP and GETS TOO CLOSE and FLIRTS. oh my god this bitch. just like she did in episode 1, except now she's more collected and ever more deliberate. flirting is her best weapon of mass distraction against rio. because look, rio might know all her tricks but she's only (very marginally) human! who can blame her if she lets herself be seduced a little bit, just a little bit! for old times' sake! in rio's defense her wife is very hot and she misses her very much, your honor

rio is like, bitch I got you allllll figured out but also lemme gently caress your thigh. to enhance your acting performance. what's a little supportive yes, and between exes

she's sooo hamming it up. compare her face here with the genuine yearning at the end of the episode

oh this is hilarious. the others hear rio's flirting over the PA and panic, but no, girls, enthusing about murder is legit how they talk dirty!! (lol at lilia being like, right in front of my salad???)

"gasp!!!! that's my coVEN you're talking abOUT!!!! I'm not that kiND OF wiTCH anYMOWRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" the ham! the ham! she might just bring the whole deli cart over at this point

and rio with her lil delighted laugh again. she doesn't get mad for one second, she didn't expect anything else. oh agatha, you silly goose, you're so damaged and so cute

let's recap what this fucker achieved with her latest performance, because it's always fascinating to study what's going on in agatha's ferociously scheming brain. she 1) distracted rio from billy. or at least tried to. 2) hinted at Rio's true nature to the others - who knows, maybe she can manipulate them into allying against her later on? 3) pretended to flirt but also flirted a lil bit forreal because there was a lot of skin showing and the flesh is weak etc etc 4) backpedaled alllllllll the way out when things got too intimate because she's too scared and resentful to get close to rio again. playing with fire as usual. or, as the kids say today, fucking around, about to find out

alice's trial has the best aesthetic fr fr. the 70s font!

I'm not 100% sure bcs it goes by so quickly but I think rio is dancing to the cursed music???

not the turntable!! that shit's vintage!!!!!!!

*brian de palma zoom*

*dramatic pause*

WE'VE BEEN CURSED (I love you patti lupone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

INJECT THIS AESTHETIC DIRECTLY INTO MY VEINS. also alice is red, billy and agatha are blue with purple undertones. the colors in this trial seem very deliberate

"she's a tourist." "she's a PSYCHO." look she never gets to just hang out and do fun things anymore, let her be!!

rio and lilia having a little staring contest as she plays with the knife. doing their own cute archnemeses thing

agatha shaking her head at billy and going shhh when he says 'maybe this curse isn't so bad.' like KID will you stop speaking HORRORS into existence?!?

alice standing with her back straight for the first time since like, ever? or since her mom died? did everyone in the family have their own personal demon or did it switch after killing the previous person? or wait, wait, was the curse only like, a metaphor until billy accidentally turned it into a disgusting 1970s animatronic harpy??

I'm convinced rio could see the demon from the beginning. look at her face here, she's the only one who sees both lilia burning and what's causing it

poor lilia must be thinking, burning witches? soooo original and not traumatic at all (lol at patti being a pro at screaming and writhing in pain on the floor. PROFESSIONAL ACTING)

no no no that's the reaping knife careful careful careful careful

alice's spell: expelle hoc malum, expel this evil. (rio when agatha tries it on her later: WHO ARE YOU CALLING EVIL)

lol. lmao, even. (just don't think about how jen has grown seLFISH TO SURVIVE AFTER HAVING TO LIVE POWERLESS AND DEFENSELESS FOR A CENTURY AND HOW SHE BECOMES MORE AND MORE GENEROUS AS SHE SPENDS TIME WITH ALICE AND LILIA)

oh noes my character just had a beast's giant talons perched on her shoulders i should flash the twins real quick so you can see it better

everyone else: EXTREME PANICKING

rio: stops reading her magazine to glance at the disgusting invisible harpy flapping around the room. goes back to the magazine.

and with this I'm off to my extreme friday night (tea and blankie and a book). ciao!

go to episode 4 part 4

[m1ss-n0mer]

Me: Okay, I know I say I'll ship Fyodor with anyone, but I'm gonna stick to mainstream ships like Fyolai and Fyozai because there's more content.

The fascinating dynamic he has with Chuuya because Chuuya is the vessel for a non-Christian god:

The way he seems to admire Sigma for being so far from humanity, and understand his feelings of isolation and loneliness, but still manipulates him seemingly without care:

The fact that he and Bram could have been one of the few reoccurring elements in each others' lives:

Him being uncomfortable and enraged by Atsushi's show of vulnerability:

Ranpo being similarly smart to him, but in a different way and therefore offering a different challenge to Dazai:

He and Agatha both being super elegant and feminine looking and giving villain couple vibes:

Yosano's ability and his being parallels (she can heal others by fatally hurting them, he can heal himself and kill others by making them fatally hurt him):

Oda and Fyodor both being heavily influential forces in Dazai's lives, and the fact that Oda is knowledgeable about the bible:

Jouno having white hair and being willing to kill Fyodor, not to mention that Jouno is a redeemed villain:

Kyouka and him having similar vibes, and the potential for her to be recruited by the DoA in an AU where they get to her before the PM or after the PM but before the ADA:

Seriously I'm pretty sure you can take two completely unrelated characters and find at least one similarity or difference that could make them an interesting ship and I love that!!

[ciderjacks]

Miss Ciderjacks could you make a list of your top 5 favorite woman characters. In honour of women month 🙏 (/nf)

ohhhh man…..only five,

okok. Ranked in no particular order.

1: DulcieEddie yes these are separate characters but they are a package deal to me. Dulcie Collins and Eddie Redcliffe. They are sooo so dear 2 me. I love how they mirror each others baggage I love that Dulcie is stuck in place while Eddie has just been violently ripped from her community I love their dynamic I love them Im crazy about them im. Insane im insane imm crazy im insane. AHQSJdkcwavsyuhvjnbs hzkdvl WATCH DEADLOCHHHH! WATCH IT NEOW !!!!!! (Honestly if this list was longer I’d name like half the characters on Deadloch LOL so many insanely well written female characters on that show)

^ gif speaks for itself they r like this the whole time

2: Agatha Harkness. Crazy personnnn!!! I luv her she sucks and is a horrible person. She’d kin kokichi if she knew what that was. she’s so so sos o so sos tragic and traumatized and miserable. She’s a canon lesbian woohoo-ing the grim reaper like a sim. She was originally a villain. She was trapped in a mind prison for three years. She’s an actor. She keeps trying to fuck powerful insane women. She briefly becomes God in an alternate universe. Her life sucks. I hate her. She dies via gay sex no thats not a joke she actually legitimately dies from gay sex. Im not kidding.

She also kills a Mind Dog and admits to it in her fucked up little villain theme song and it’s incredible.

3: Marcilleee….bbbygirl u r so fucked uop. I love her as a mixed girl and I love her even more as a woman with a vague inferiority complex. I like that she is canonically a teacher. I love a lot of things about her. I could write essays on Marcille she is genuinely such an interesting and nuanced character but that’s not what this list is so I’ll save that for a comic or smth. ANYWAYS. I love Marcille so much.

^ Marcille moment

4: Falin Touden sure lets put the dunmeshi ppl right next to each other. I love Falin. Falin is so interesting and a lot of her is inferred bc her ass is dead most of the time. But everything we know about her paints such an interesting picture. Also she’s really cute to me. Sorry I know it seems like I have less to say, I have a lot of thoughts on Falin but they’re difficult to put into words. I think I like her so much bc I really relate to her narrative arc being centred around other characters inability to see her as an adult, and her finding the confidence to assert herself as one.

also bc of this page. Most important Falin page imo, it completely changes everything we know about her. Like its one of the few real glimpses we get into her inner world, and its dark. Girl has got trauma for days but u know she doesnt think she has any at all.

5: Teruhashi Kokomi. Jdhjhj Ough. So many characters I wanna put here. But I think I have to put her. I luv Teruhashi so much , I mostly talk about her on my side blog for saiki k stuff but I really love Teruhashi. She’s fascinating and also she is sooooo fucked upppp! her insane twisted sense of self is my favorite thing about her. Also her hatred of children.

Heart heart Teruhashi moment

[meraki-yao]

okay WOW that new episode of Agatha All Along blew me away

I think this is what I prefer in media that allows for creative storytelling? Unconventional timelines and devices. It's what made me like Wandavision (first 3 episodes entirely different from what we expect from Marvel with zero context) and Winter Soldier (absolutely not knowing what is going on or who to trust besides Steve, the POV character) so much. Telling the story out of order, or rather, in Lilia's order was fascinating. Also I like Tarots, so this episode was really fun for me personally!!!

And oh my God, Lilia :(((

The ending broke my heart :((((

[skippiefritz]

reqs from @idanit and @beetle-goth (sorry for tags I'll untag if asked ^^;)

long rambly post ahead! Unlike what I normally post but its my account so I can do what I want lol

(This probably isn't the most historical thing I’ve ever written but! I will fix as I work on it more lol)

the implications of Bertie's bachelorhood if he were a bachelorette fascinate me endlessly

I read this post and it gave me brain worms and I've been designing an au around it ever since

In this au it's a complete genderswap with all characters, uncle Alistair (aunt Agatha) becomes more old fashioned sexist to Bertie, not thinking she can take care of herself. (sorry Agatha stans)

Which like. She can't. But it's nothing to do with her being a woman.

Bertie keeps her core character traits, but by merely being a woman living alone in 1920s London, she inherently becomes more independent and rebellious.

She's sneakier about her escapades, still stealing hats off bobby's and the like, but tries to be subtle about it. Emphasis on tries, she's still a Wooster at her core, and thus a very

big klutz.

Bertie is just completely and unapologetically her/himself regardless of gender, for better or for worse.

If humble pie is being served, she will surely go back for seconds every time.

I can picture her leaning very hard into the roaring twenties flapper persona, but still being a homebody at heart. Big of heart, dumb of ass.

The biggest issue of course is the engagements, it’s a lot harder for a woman (particularly one whose family wants her to get married) to get out of engagements. THIS is where the fun new plots come in

Obviously there’s the classic setting up her fiances with other women, so they call it off and marry their true loves. And the occasional making herself seem unsuitable to be married. (though, this would usually backfire, that would make it seem like she needed to be married more, so she had a man to take care of her and make her settle down)

Instead of focusing on making it seem she herself is un-weddable, she (and by she I mean Jeeves) concocts byzantine schemes to paint her potential suitors in the worst light possible, or to make them seem negligible so one family or the other would call it off.

I’ve been working on one such story, I haven't ironed out all the details but it ends with Gussie pushing Bertie into a lake. Of course. (I may make  a comic abt it when done)

Jeeves’ character is fascinating too, I see her being the classic “quiet competent woman who gets shit done”. She would be less respected than m!jeeves, but still far more respected than the average maidservant of her time.

I can see her need for fashion clashing with the maidservant outfits of the time, part of me is tempted to keep her design the exact same and make her a big beautiful butch, but…I know that's probably not how it would go.

Jeeves would wear the classic Maidservant outfit of the time, though I can see her styling it subtly to suit her more.

Her control over Bertie’s wardrobe, while still being “God this bitch has no fashion”, also has an undercurrent of internalized sexism. She’s discomforted by the more risque (by those times) outfits Bertie enjoys wearing, like her flashy flapper dresses and the like.

Of course, she’s also uncomfortable by how attractive she finds her in said risque clothes. (drama!!)

And they end up compromising !!! and Jeeves has a lil arc in learning to accept the new fashion wave and embracing bodies and whatnot.

Their dynamic would essentially be the same, homoeroticism, Jeeves being morosexual, Bertie being endlessly impressed by her.

also because of the ridiculous british nicknames most the characters are referred to the same, they just have diff first names, here's a quick cheat sheet

(I tried to keep them similar and also extremely english)

Reginald Jeeves = Regina Jeeves

Bertam "Bertie" Wooster = Bertha "Bertie" Wooster

Reginald Jeeves = Regina Jeeves

Aunt Agatha/Dahlia = uncle Alistor/Dahl

Augustus "Gussie" Fink-Nottle = August "Gussie" Fink-Nottle

Charles "Biffy" Biffen = Charlotte "Biffy" Biffen

Marmaduke "Chuffy" Chuffnell = Marigold "Chuffy" Chuffnell

Stephanie "Stiffy" Byng = Stewart "Stiffy" Byng (the implications of a man being named Stiffy are. different but Wodehouse had to know what he was doing with that name)

Richard "Bingo" little = Richenda "Bingo" Little

and so on and so forth!

Anyway uh, this went on for a while lol

I’m working on designs for them and will gladly share if asked! But they’re nowhere near done dhjdsh thanks for coming to my ted talk.

I don't know if any of this made sense, sorry if it doesn’t.

also for a bonus here's a quick messy collage I made of f!Bertie

[iamverynormalaboutsge]

What if the Storian orchestrated... Everything?

It has been established that the Storian was 'sealed to the two schools, bound to be ruled with balance and to not be influenced/fall into the wrong hands'. Right so that is just a load of bull. Why? Because there was always ONE Peter Pen until the Twins. And even after the evil one remained the pen balanced the injustice out by MAKING good win. That or he just never wrote the stories in which evil did win for over a century on purpose!

We also saw it SEE into the future in the main series. We also saw how it nearly killed Sophie for just coming CLOSE to it! I don't know HOW Tedros chained it in book 2, maybe the same way Rafal grabbed it to stab Agatha BUT STILL. It feels like the Storian CHOOSES when to be a God or just a pen.

Also, you can't tell me some old men or wizards decided the pen needed protectors. NO. I think it was LITERALLY the Storian orchestrating its farming grounds where he would pluck out pre-teens and teens who are FULL of emotion and make great characters to write in that aspect between waiting for them to ripen before collecting them.

I refuse to believe that the Storian isn't literally how a writer would be with its fantasy world. They choose when to allow the characters to indulge themselves with 'winning' or not before doing as it pleases.

The Storian started to draw Rafal just to then make Rhian's blue eyes. IF the Storian wanted he could have stopped Rhian. But he didn't. However, he still punished him. Does it make sense? Hello?

The Storian is so complex it both terrifies me and fascinates me.

[sizzlingstarlightsky]

Our favorite Azriel stan 🦇🖤💙 !!

1. Why is Azriel one of your favorite characters?

2. Is there a specific scene that made you like them?

3. What theories/headcanons do you have for Azriel?

4. Feel free to share anything else about Azriel that the questions didn’t cover!

OMG THANK YOU ✨️🖤 You're too kind.

I'll always find reasons to bring our Shadow Daddy up. So I love this, and I'm honored!

1. I'm mean... how could he not be a favorite? 🤭 Honestly though, he's exactly my type. Well, one half of it, lol. His mind intrigues me. I'm fascinated with the dark and mysterious, so it only makes sense. I like complex characters.

2. It wasn't until he was shot by Jurian that I fully realized Rhys wasn't my fictional husband.

But there was the little sentence when Feyre was eating with the IC for the first time. I can find the quote, but it's something about him having a facial reaction to her story. I was intrigued. I wanted to know more. Then, seeing his quiet sarcastic personality solidified it for me. Confirmed with the tree scene in ACOWAR. I grew up with a huge crush on Danny Phantom and Shego, so is anyone surprised?

3. Theory wise: I'm terrified tbh. I don't trust SJM and her character development.

Az is absolutely more powerful than we know. I do feel he's connected to the stars but I haven't finished TOG or even thought about reading CC so idk all the lore. I want to see him deal with Illyria. Let him tear the place apart and wreck havoc. Gods, I also desperately need a chapter minimum just on his torture. I need to understand the inner workings of his brain.

Headcanons: He would love Agatha Christie books. He'd be a big Tool, Rush, and Pink Floyd fan. The best dancer of the Bat Boys. Tells his mom more than anyone else. She probably knows all his secrets, I love her. He feeds stray animals whenever he can. Probably has spare snacks, just in case. Would be a goth stoner. Loves gossip, but only shares to his shadows and tea club (of coursemama shadow is included). He's a side sleeper. Does hand exercises for the scar tissue.

I feel like he smiles when he tortures. Like, that part of him is happy to have a release.

You know the relationship is getting more serious when he starts leaving blades around your place.

I also believe this male is a pussy and cock CONNOISSEUR.

I saw someone headcanon that Illyrians have knots. Do with that as you will.

I can't think of anything else, so here's some outfits I could see Azriel wearing/ want him to wear 🖤🤭💙

[drinkyourvillainjuice]

Result from the Google Form (part 2/x)

Parasitical

Very interesting premise! You’re a cultist living in a behemoth’s carcass managing the fine line of living day-to-day and the unease of a commune straining under the seemingly all-seeing authority that governs it. And then certain characters arrive to explode that fine line into smithereens (naturally). Unfortunately this is how I found out author nuked their tumblr :( but the demo is still on

Lost Lambs

Murder-mystery whodunit but from the POV of the killer. You’re gearing up to join an Agatha Christie-like ensemble of cast, but before that: kill, learn about your past, and customize your skills and covers. Meet your partner in murder. UNFORTUNATELY INACTIVE but its Fun give it some love (and the author also!)

God-Cursed

Writing it has brought some much-needed light into my life, and I'd quite like to share that with others.

Fervency

Well first off, the creator is a mutual, so I have to rep. But also it's a (light) horror IF where you're turned into a monster and now have to contend with a strange hunger for flesh or blood while attending a masquerade. And there's bisexual vampires, and the only RO I've ever fallen for. :)

Stay?

yummy flavor text, so many posibilities, so many outcomes, time loops, too many of them, can you save them all? Its intriguing to connect the dots on each time loop, fascinating. You can even marry the RO! till death do us apart

One Knight Stand

Insane amount of choices that have big impact on the game!! Super fun and has a really compelling story.

[witchysniffles]

UM HI YOUR AGATHARIO FIC IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE AND I GENUINELY DONT KNOW HOW TO GO ON WITH LIFE AS NORMAL AFTER READING

(i loved it so much, youre an excellent writer and you got both characters absolutely spot on 😩💖)

allergic!agatha is my favourite headcannon ever - its hilariously sexy to me that this woman whos lived over three centuries, survived the salem witch trials and killed presumably thousands of innocent people can be taken OUT by a little bit of pollen - and im endlessly glad that we seem to have collectively agreed upon rio being a MASSIVE snzfucker ajsdjks

OHHH MY GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! 😭😭 that seriously means the world to me!! i'm still pretty new to writing them (in a kink context or otherwise) and ngl it's been a bit of a challenge figuring them out, but i literally love them and their dynamic sooo much, so the fact that it came across and other people actually liked it too?? i can't put into words what that means, so thank you SO much!!

and also holy shit, hard agree. the moment rio popped up with that first flower my horny brain said 'haha but like, what if she was allergic to that' and i have never looked back. obv the irony is great, but also i've been thinking soo much lately about how a/gatha is decidedly Not a person who would handle that kind of annoyance/discomfort well, so like...something, something, being willing to put up with her allergies/finding workarounds and creative solutions (and also indulging lbr) as a kind of love language bc she loves rio more than she wants to avoid the potential...unpleasantness

and YES snzfucker!rio is something that can honestly just be soooo personal. it's obv soo hot, but i also think about it coming from a place of fascination with the physicality of humanity (listen, smthg about the way she delivers that 'you're vulnerable' in the first ep with tears in her eyes is just everything to me) and for me that adds so much to their dynamic in general, but more importantly it means she could be into A LOT (oh boy do i have thots on some kinks i could give her) and luckily she fell for the one bitch on earth who could match her freak from the get.

i feel like i'm starting to ramble at this point, but this show and these characters are taking up so much of my brain space rn so this will surely not be the last you hear from me!!

[shiryawashere]

Okay because we are both deLulu over Agatha All Along that's what I'm choosing for you for the blorbo ask game

ALRIGHT LET'S GO I'M LOCKED IN

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): At this point probably Agatha though it's subject to change lol. I find the shifts in her demeanor fascinating and her mystery compels me.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): RIO VIDAL

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): I feel like my faves are very mainstream lol but I will name Lilia Calderu anyway because I would die for her

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): Listen. Hear me out. Sharon Davis okay every time I saw Sharon Davis I was hyped she's just happy to be there and by god I respect it

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): I mean I feel like Agatha is by far the poor little meow meowest of them all

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): AGATHA lmao <3 *slaps roof of her* this badboy can fit so much angst in her

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): Agatha's mom smh

Thanks for the ask!

[the-darkness-does-not-bargain]

SCP-XXXX: “Ava”, chapter 4 preview

Just a tidbit of what I’m working on.  Hope you guys are still excited for this!

SCP-XXXX: Do you mean it?

Dr. Young: Mean what?

SCP-XXXX: About all this.  Will you really teach me about cells and stuff?

Dr. Young smiles.

Dr. Young: Yes, Ava, if you’re willing to learn, I will teach you.  Do you like learning about science?

SCP-XXXX shrugs.

SCP-XXXX: It beat bible study by a mile.  Though that might have more to do with the teachers.  Sister Agatha taught all the science classes, such as they were.  She tried to make it a little fun… even did the whole mini volcano thing during the geology unit.  We thought that was the coolest shit.

Dr. Young: I’m not a geologist, but the study of volcanic activity is fascinating.  I’m sure the library here has books on it if you’re interested.

SCP-XXXX: I think I’ll stick with biology to start, not that rocks aren’t cool as shit.  Thanks, Bea.

Dr. Young: Of course, Ava.

Approximately 5 seconds of silence elapse.

SCP-XXXX: So… what about you?

Dr. Young: Hmm?  What about me?

SCP-XXXX shifts forward in her chair, shifting her weight to either side in a semi-regular rhythm.

SCP-XXXX: Well, obviously you like learning about science, but did you always want to study animals and cells and stuff?

Dr. Young taps her pen against her notepad.  3 seconds of silence elapse.  SCP-XXXX leans back and flushes.

SCP-XXXX: Sorry, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.

Dr. Young smiles at SCP-XXXX.

Dr. Young: Given all the questions we expect you to answer, it’s more than fair for you to ask some in return.  I apologize for my absentmindedness.

SCP-XXXX: Oh, no worries.  It’s chill.

Dr. Young: To answer your question, no.  For a long time, I didn’t want to pursue a career in science at all.  I was always fascinated by it, but I never even considered earning a degree in it until I entered university.

SCP-XXXX leans forward again.

SCP-XXXX: What did you think you wanted to do?

Dr. Young: Don’t laugh when I tell you.  It seems quite strange in retrospect.

SCP-XXXX: Wouldn’t dream of it.

Dr. Young: Well… I actually wanted to study religion, and eventually join the church.  I was raised Catholic, and my family was very devout.

SCP-XXXX: Are they doctors too?  Or… religion-studiers or whatever?

Dr. Young chuckles.

Dr. Young: The term you want is theologian.  But no, they were politicians, diplomats.  When I showed less than zero interest in politics, they pushed me to study theology as the only suitable alternative.  They never neglected my education, so I knew that I enjoyed science before but… I also thought that a life devoted to faith would be good for me.

SCP-XXXX: Until?

Dr. Young: Until it came time for me to choose my classes for the first term, and I chose a biology elective.  I took it for fun, I never thought it would cause me to change anything about my path in life.

SCP-XXXX: But it did.

Dr. Young: But it did.  It didn’t happen all at once.  Actually, in hindsight, it was quite slow.  One class turned into more, but I continued to pursue my theology degree well into my third year.  At first, I thought that studying both would give me a richer understanding of my faith, and in many ways it did.

SCP-XXXX: Meaning?

Dr. Young shrugs.

Dr. Young: I believe that there are higher powers out there in the universe.  But what shape those powers take, I have no idea.  God may look nothing like I always imagined Him, but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

SCP-XXXX: …But he could be a weird tentacle guy.

Dr. Young laughs.

Dr. Young: He could be.  But there’s a kind of freedom in not knowing, don’t you think?  When you’re certain you know how the world works, you become limited within its perceived rules.  It’s only when you open yourself up to the possibility of being wrong that you can recognize how little you actually know about anything.  It’s a frightening revelation, but an exciting one too.  The rules you thought you were rigid and clearly defined fall away, and a universe of new potential opens up in their wake.  There’s something divine about that, I think.  A single moment of seeing the world as He must.

Approximately 2 seconds of elapse.

SCP-XXXX: So you’re, like, smart smart, huh?

Dr. Young laughs.

Dr. Young: What do you mean by that?

SCP-XXXX flushes and wiggles in her seat.

SCP-XXXX: I mean, like, you know stuff, but you also know stuff about stuff.  Shit, that sounds so stupid.  Forget I said anything.

Dr. Young: I understand what you meant.  It’s not stupid, Ava, and neither are you.

SCP-XXXX: Yeah, sure…

Dr. Young leans forward and rests her hand flat on the table.

Dr. Young: You’re not stupid, Ava.  Uneducated, perhaps, but that isn’t your fault.  And we’re going to fix that now, aren’t we?

SCP-XXXX looks away and bites her bottom lip, and then grins at Dr. Young, who grins back.

SCP-XXXX: Yeah, I guess we are.

[spaceorphanssecondbreakfastclub]

Reading Agatha Christie: Crooked House

Crooked House is one of Christie's books that is ultimately remembered by the twist at the end -- kind of like The Murder of Roger Ackroyd. And is often placed on top ten lists of Christie's work -- even remembered by Christie as one of her favorites. Is it really that good? That's an interesting question, that doesn't have the easiest of answers...

The story revolves around the Leonides family and the murder of the patriarch - Aristotle Leonides. The novel is narrated by Charles Hayward, the love interest of Aristotle's granddaughter Sophia -- as he helps unravel the mystery behind the murder.

I think one of Christie's strong points is that she does these family dynamic murders really well. It's a theme that does continue to crop in her stories and I think while she does have a few trope-ish characters when it comes to these novels, she's able to shape them in a way that it doesn't feel redundant of things she's already written.

The thing about this novel is that the focus on the murder is the only thing going on. There really aren't any subplots, and there really aren't any diversions either. The book, as with so many of her novels in the 40s, becomes a character study -- more about those living in the house and under the influence of Leonides than it is about the murder.

But it all leads to that shocking twist at the end, which... God, I even hate to say it, might have been more shocking in 1949 then perhaps today.

The thing is -- I did remember how this one ends, and I did find it fascinating upon reread how well the twist becomes apparent? It didn't necessarily hinder my reading of it - I kind of enjoyed being able to peek behind the curtain as I was able to catch Christie's clever set ups and hints.

The thing that makes my thoughts on it complicated, though, is the fact that I think the novel feels somewhat thin; especially knowing where it's going. It's one of those books that I think does work really well when you first read it - because you become so emersed in who did it and why, but I think I did miss Christie's tangents and layering in of more complicated plots. It might be the tightest novel she's ever written, and somewhat simple, too which isn't a bad thing. But I guess I wish I had just gotten more.

Overall, yes, it is a good book. The characters are pretty well drawn and the story is effortlessly easy to follow. The ending is a bit unnerving, and it is one of her most unique twists. I do recommend it, even if I'm not over the moon in love with it.

[wenchofthescullery]

What To Do During the Strike, Day 7

*

So, mystery.

When I started writing, I quickly gravitated toward mystery. It can be a beautiful genre that balances firm structure with plenty of embroidering. It's like Bach, but in story form -- you have the concatenations marching through the piece, laying the groundwork for the flights of fancy.

If you want to comment on the human condition in the stories you tell, they had best have a strong framework. Sir Terry Pratchett was the master of this. You will note, though, that Discworld was a fully realized setting, that the characters were both three-dimensional and with very clearly defined roles, and that the plots usually marched forward in generally predictable ways. The story was solid. His commentary on people, justice, integrity, and the human condition then was interwoven throughout.

With a mystery, you also have a plot driven story. Something happens, other things follow in pretty predictable ways, and there is eventually a conclusion. As a writer, the plot carries you. It marches. It holds to the center.

Now the basic murder mystery approaches are typically "police procedural" or some kind of "private detective" (professional or amateur). Agatha Christie notably had some one-offs that did not fit well into categories, but she was an exception. These days, what is being sold is usually one or the other.

I started studying Connelly because of his popularity, but I became fascinated by his commentary. The structure was there, and as a crime beat writer, he had the technicals of a police procedural down cold -- but he named his first main character after a 15th century Dutch painter known for his nightmarish and bizarre depictions of Hell?

Well, I'll be damned, this man was trying to say something. And yes, I get it -- cops see hell. His character Harry Bosch had seen hell before, too, particularly in the jungles and tunnels of Vietnam in war.

And here is where it gets interesting. You might not be all that enthused to read about police right now. God knows, we have a lot going on in the press and our recent US history that makes inhabiting the mind of a cop, well, to sound perfectly unpalatable. (And this was how I felt anyway, back in my 20's -- it just did not appeal. I'd seen too much in the South.)

However, Connelly will not fail you. Bosch has, at his core, an implacable moral code expressed as "Everybody counts, or nobody counts." Goddamn. That's the categorical imperative from Immanuel Kant. This mystery writer is doing interesting things.

The categorical imperative has about five different (but linked) formulations. The second formulation (the "formula of humanity"/ the "formula of the end in itself") is most applicable to Bosch's code: Act in such a way that you always treat humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of any other, never simply as a means, but always at the same time as an end.

Kant makes the argument in the 1785 Grounding of the Metaphysics of Morals that every rational agent has his or her own goals, desires, and projects -- and that none of these are more important than any other. In fact, insofar as one can, we are all beholden to further the projects and interests of others as if they were our own. They count just as much as ours do.

All of us are ends in ourselves, acting as agents in the kingdom of morality, and we should never be treating others as a means only to our own ends.

"Everybody counts, or nobody counts."

Bosch is a complex character, both flawed and failing at times. But he never, never would have put a knee to George Floyd's neck, and he would not have let a fellow officer's actions in the manner go without pursuit for justice.

Police work is never going to be pretty and clean. Sometimes you see the depths of the human condition in the state of hell. But can you write a character that walks through a slime pit of moral decay with a moral code maybe tarnished, but still intact?

I think you can. I think that was Connelly's main project in writing this character. Now, he went on to develop other themes and characters (you probably know about The Lincoln Lawyer), but there were about 20 Bosch novels. Consider reading them. He does interesting things with the characters as well, but that's for another piece. For now, if you want a police procedural that can cleanse your palate of some of the recent terrors, you might start with The Black Echo.

-------------------------

Next up, poetry.

[trixiwritesfanfic]

We'll Do It Right This Time

Chapter 1: Tensions Build In Castle Town

‘Oh my. Agatha. Agatha!’ A bespectacled girl with white hair clutched at her friend, who was currently examining the various oddities collected by a man wearing a beetle backpack.

‘Look, Lea, he has pinned Smotherwings…’

‘Oh, Agatha! This is much more interesting – look!’ A hand with meticulously painted fingernails pointed, rather rudely it must be said, at an entourage of tall, buff people. ‘There’s a Voe in among the Gerudo!’

‘A what?’

‘Voe! It’s the Gerudo word for a man, keep up, can’t you?’ A hand clasped around Agatha’s wrist and suddenly she was being dragged from her window shopping in search of a higher vantage point. ‘There’s an old wives’ tale that says they’re almost always evil and try to take over the world!’

‘You do talk the most wonderful nonsense, Lea.’

‘It’s true! My Grammy Josha told me so.’

‘Your Grammy Josha’s going batty. Can you slow down? I’m sweating and you know how my hair sticks to me when I sweat.’

‘Oh, you’ll be fine you baby,’ grumbled Lea, casting a quick look at the brunette’s highly coiffed hair. ‘A little bit of exercise is good for you.’

‘Not in heels it’s not.’

The bickering petered out as they raced through Castle Town, although for different reasons. Lea’s expression was focused and excited, while her Hylian friend’s was flushed with the combination of exertion and frustration. Finally, near the high wall that separated the castle from the town, they stopped, Agatha bent over and panting.

‘Why… can every Sheikah… run a marathon… at the drop… of a hat? What’s wrong… with you all?’

‘Wow, rude. We train, you know that. Shush, look, here they come!’

The approaching retinue consisted almost entirely of women; they stood head and shoulders above most of the townsfolk. There seemed very little height discrepancy between them, most of them at least 7’0” by Lea’s estimation – perhaps a specific requirement for bodyguards? There wasn’t even one among them who wasn’t sculpted as finely as marbled gods, and they travelled in a disciplined, marching formation.

In the middle, about a head taller than the women, a man who was similarly sculpted, though broader and liberally swathed in tribal markings. Similar traditions seemed to persist regardless of cultural identity – just as the Eye of Truth marked the strongest bloodline amongst the Sheikah, the tribal designs designated Gerudo royalty. It was a fascinating topic, really.

‘Why do you think he’s here?’ Agatha finally seemed to have caught her breath and curiosity had taken hold at long last.

‘Reaffirming alliances, maybe? I think this is the first Gerudo Voe born since the Great Upheaval; I wouldn’t blame our Queen for wanting to know he’s, you know. Not going to go the way of the last one.’

One of the Gerudo Vai had clearly heard her, for suddenly there were sharp green eyes boring into Lea’s very soul, a warning expression etched into the powerful features. The Sheikah girl’s entire face flushed, her Eye of Truth tattoo slowly blending into the pink. The moment passed relatively quickly, for the long, muscular legs of the group were swift and without hesitation.

‘…That was scary. I shouldn’t have said that so loud.’

‘Bet that’ll be awkward when you see them tonight at the technology presentation,’ teased Agatha, nudging at her friend’s ribs with a rather pointed elbow.

‘Oh, crud, I forgot all about that! I gotta go swot up or Cadoc will kill me! Talk later!’

‘We’re going to have a tough time assuring the people of Hyrule that Ganz has not received the soul of the demon king, Payu.’ The sharp-eyed soldier had turned to her partner in arms following the interaction, a disgruntled look on her face.

‘Yes, but you knew that before we came here. Why are you mentioning it now?’

‘Because it’s just become real, I suppose.’

‘Don’t worry, Nalani. You know how he is with people. I would not be surprised if their Queen is eating out of our Ganz’s hands in no time.’

‘Ladies!’ The man in question had taken a handful of bouncing steps, easily sweeping to the front of the formation. ‘You gossiping? Can I get in on that action? Or are we swapping hair tips?’ Ganz wore a broad, open smile; his eyes crinkled at the corners and twinkled excitedly.

‘If you have time for gossip then perhaps Kalana did not give you enough homework to do. And have you picked out an appropriate robe for your meeting with the Royal Family?’

‘Nope! But hear me out – we want my genuine self, right? No tricks, no games, just me. So why in the world would I shove myself into a stuffy formal robe which probably looks a lot like what the old tyrants wore when they came for their meetings, when I could just wear my traditional Voe outfit?’ A muscular arm had been draped around Nalani’s shoulder as he spoke, for she was the more likely of the two to argue against him.

‘That… is certainly an unconventional approach to a diplomatic meeting. What if you offend the queen?’

‘You realise she probably doesn’t like wearing those big fancy dresses either, right? I bet she wishes she could just chuck them all out and wear those tight little breeches the commonfolk have. What about you, Payu? What do you think?’

‘I’m not paid to have an opinion, your Majesty.’

‘Aw, bollocks to that, tell me how you really feel, go on!’ The other arm looped around Payu’s shoulders now, and Ganz pulled both women almost into his armpits. ‘C’mon, I can take it, I’m a big lad. Pluck my own eyebrows and everything.’

‘Okay. I think you’re right. The less thought you’re putting into your behaviour and appearance, the more I think you’ll dispel the various presumptions of the people.’

‘Course I’m right, I’m The Vai!’

‘Remember, Ganz, they’re more patriarchal here, you might not want to shout that.’

‘Our culture is important Payu; I’m not about to sacrifice that for anyone. I’m definitely The Vai.’

‘Okay, okay, you’re The Vai,’ she smirked, patting the wide forearm that protruded into her line of sight. ‘Now please, release me. We’re coming up on the guard outpost and I wish to be taken seriously.’

‘You seem tense, Queen Zelda.’

‘You have no idea, Robert. This meeting really ought to have occurred when both the Gerudo King and I were children. I know that my father was focused on restoring trade between Hyrule and Labrynna, but I really feel he did not future-proof as effectively as he should have. He knew there was a Voe born to the Gerudo and that there are fears of another calamity…’ The queen sighed, rubbing gingerly at the tips of her ears to soothe her nerves.

‘Mm. If I may, the Zoran people may have suffered immensely without the established fishing agreements. And the exploration and subsequent clearing of the depths would not have been possible without the various power rings and gloves of their smitheries.’ The scholar’s words rang true – Hyrule would not have been the same without those agreements. All the same, it would have been better, in her view, if they had managed to address the hypothetical reawakening of the demon king alongside reaching back out to their neighbours.

Well, it was too late for regrets now.

‘Do you know if the cleaning crew have finished with the history chambers? I should like to take the Gerudo King down there and illustrate for him what exactly I hope to prevent.’ Where once there had been carvings of King Rauru, Queen Sonia, and the Sages, further rooms had been built, and more friezes sculpted, depicting the events of the Upheaval. Daphnes the fourth, son of the princess of Upheaval, had bidden that the tale be preserved in something more durable than books, learning from the loss of generations past.

‘I believe they are doing one last pass. I shall send one of the kitchen lads to check on the process.’

‘Please do.’

With a quick click of his heels, an alternative to the usual low bowing that commonfolk often performed, her advisor acknowledged the request and then swept from the throne room, leaving Zelda alone.

It was nerve-wracking, just waiting here like this. Normally, she would have ridden out to meet their visitors, but the spirit of the hero had not yet presented himself to her, and she therefore feared to leave the comparative shelter of her fortress and its well-trained guard. It might have been a good thing, the absence of the hero – it spoke to a possibility that this particular Gerudo may not follow the unfortunate trend. Equally, however, it could simply mean he could snatch their world and crush it before anyone could stop him.

Her father’s decision to spare the child in his infancy had been an insurmountable gamble, and she could only trust his gut. No backup. No insurance. One man’s intuition could make or break the fate of her generation.

[gothprentiss]

another franchise that confused fun for a well*-placed (*in practice: poorly) comedian and snappy pacing— recent poirot movies. kenneth branagh sucks for a whole variety of reasons but a big one is his total failure to make any aspect of those movies fun or compelling. this is of course fascinating bc agatha christie adaptations SCREAM for particular kinds of updating in their sensibilities and outlook, and their plots all need profound winnowing down, and yet! consistently makes them worse!

if i were in a typing mood— and more dauntingly, if i were in the mood to rewatch turdy death on the nile (2022)— i’d note at greater length that there’s something to be said about how, despite its copious other flaws, the movie’s greatest flaw is its desire to give poirot traumatic Depth. one thing i found compelling in parul seghal’s “the trauma plot” was that the lede uses the word “mystery” to describe the particular aesthetics of depth inherent in the trauma plot— i don’t think seghal uses the word in the article proper, nor does she ever appear to be working in the register of the mystery narrative. for indeed not all that which is first hidden then brought to life is a mystery! nor must it share the mystery narrative’s ethos about revelation. but the kinds of depth that trauma plots create (or insist on in taking trauma as the primal scene of depth) are necessarily adversarial to the arc of the mystery narrative; they work on different timescales (the trauma plot discovers the past to describe the disorderly present; the mystery uncovers the past in order to get beyond a disorderly present) and have radically distinct trajectories (the trauma plot is normalizing and explanatory, whereas the mystery explains abnormality). the other adversarial aspect is their singularity, for they are quite structurally similar, but in ways which seem to constantly jostle.

again i am no agatha christie stan but one pronounced feature of her mysteries is the relative shallowness of her detectives. this doesn’t need much investigation— neither (poirot nor marple) are particularly familiar with love or prone to violence, which makes them keener observers of it. they work by analogy which isn’t as hierarchical as it would be if they were more like the people involved in their cases. they’re often able to interact with the world around them as narrative as a result: they’re less personally involved in it, and it lays less claim to them than to others. death on the nile 2022 sees this as insufficient (poirot MUST nurse a dark past, MUST have some horrible loss pushing his fastidious dandiness, MUST be personally involved in the crime) and reacts accordingly. maybe the lesson here is that we’re outgrowing older forms of narrative in favor of neater and more contrived narrative impulses (it reminds me of neil gaiman and robert zemeckis deciding that beowulf’s loose ends should all be tied up by making it an expansive family drama, the tragedy of fathers failing their monstrous sons, which i also think is a dogshit oversimplification of an interesting narrative complexity worth preserving), and in so doing running unprofitably against the problem of franchising and rebooting and so on: the unstoppable force of recycling content, the immovable object of old forms. something like glass onion ostensibly trades on the tradition of golden age whodunits (as well as, oh my god rian johnson, their catharsis), but uncomfortably. this is perhaps the most teleological of all narrative forms and as such is not easily derailed (disrupted!) even by a partial restructuring.

point being that this era of reboots and remakes and tie-ins and reduxes and Doing Another One Of That Thing and so on is interesting in terms of how obviously creators want to update their source material yet seem fundamentally unwilling to accept that ethos and ideology are inherent in narrative form as much as they are in narrative content. and, of course, also that they’re really stuck in a position where redoing something is the surer bet than trying something new (most notably in movies and tv), so there’s only so much leeway that this desire to make stuff actually reflective of their tastes and values actually has.

[whotfelsewantedtobelynnyx]

Literally OBSESSED OMG 😱 I am SO HERE for your Darkhold! Jen take, not only because DAMN does corruption look good on her but oh my god that would piss Agatha off SO MUCH 😂 imagining her going looking for the Darkhold being freed from the hex only to find Jen with it and oh my gooooooodddddd, Jen would be so incredibly smug and I would be LIVING for it.

But on a serious un-Agatha related note, the design is GORGEOUS. I love taking her canon coat and using it as a sort of cape (that shit is GENIUS right there) and darkening her usual pink motif created SUCH a beautiful color palette. Those pants compliment her figure so beautifully (she really got done dirty outfit-wise in the last few episodes and this is SO MUCH MORE what she deserved) and I am LIVING for those boots. And don’t think I didn’t notice that the necklace (the one that looked like chains binding her) is gone either, literally just eating up all the little details.

And ALICE OMG. Love love LOVE her leaning into the flame colors and OBSESSED with her showing off a bit more of her muscles. Not that I didn’t already love her hairstyle, but the bangs are SELLING the look- really taking her cut, which is a little more…well, hot-topic security guard (no offense to hot topic security guards) and elevating it to kickass witch. The mask is badass, and you’re definitely slowly converting me over to the side of Alice and the tiger motif. Love that her necklace is more of a choker, too- almost looks like a collar (which I bet Jen likes 😉)

Overall just OBSESSED with these two and absolutely fascinated by the idea of their villain! arcs. Seriously, I wish I’d waited until I’d gotten home to look at this, because my brain is now STORMING with AU ideas about this absolute power couple (I’m picturing Jen as like…almost a mob boss, agreeing to break Alice’s curse in exchange for her services as a protection witch, and them slowly falling in love as Jen continues to spread her influence and Alice becomes increasingly loyal to her. But that might just be because I love the idea of Darkhold! Jen monologuing with villain! Alice either looming protectively behind her, or Alice laying her head in her lap so Jen can stroke her hair like a cat while she talks. No, I’m not obsessed. What’re you talking about?)

thanks to the good people of twitter and tumblr combined, I present to you, a Villains!Bloodpotions AU.

I'm obsessed with Alice having tiger motifs so I wanted to give her a fur coat that looks kinda like the flames on her canon jacket. I also wanted to push her cyberpunk theming too.

Jen on the other hand I also pushed her canon outfit. I also think she might have gotten her hands on the Darkhold to unbind if Agatha hadn't gotten to it first. love them both! thank you to everyone who voted.

I'm not done with these designs >:3 you'll DEFO see them again!