#god this took me forever to write... my hands are dying rn

[bones4thecats]

What If They Were Fathers?

Type of Writing: #5 - Poll Result Characters: Bonten! Manjiro Sano, Sanzu Haruchiyo, Kakucho, and Hajime Kokonoi Name: What If They Were Fathers? Original Poll Link: Here

A/N: The Reader is FEMALE in this, since they're pregnant and whatnot.

WARNING! This contains: Mentions of drugs, overdoses, alcohol addiction, and drug addiction

Spoilers for: Bonten Arc

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🍵 It shocked Mikey enough that you still loved him even though he wasn't the same happy-go-lucky boy he was years ago, instead, he grew into a emotionless and dead-appearing individual

🍵 So, when he heard that you were pregnant, he'd be lying if he said he didn't feel a small bit of love grow inside his now cold-heart

🍵 Mikey was very good when it came to caring for you during your pregnancy, he would have the others go get you things you needed, since he suspected someone was after him and you

🍵 After all, being pregnant slows down a woman from whooping ass

🍵 It was surprising, but, when you went into labor and you were yelling at him as he tried calming you down, Mikey stayed as calm as ever

🍵 He would slightly flinch at the loud screams of pain you let out, and he was honestly kinda scared he may lose you when the gang's doctor rushed you to lay down and stay calm

" Mr. Sano, sir, would you like to hold your baby? "

🍵 Looking behind him, he stared at his first child, a son, and he felt a shimmer of happiness and sadness rush through him at the same time, it reminded him of when he first met Emma, how he cared for her automatically without any reason

🍵 As he held your baby, he let a tear rush down his cheek as you chuckled at his small moment of vulnerability, something he swore he would never show was in-fact showing, he was still human inside

🍵 Now, while your son grew up, Mikey was a hint of a helicopter-father, he runs a very dangerous organization, one that is being hunted by authorities constantly, and he had enough to do when worrying about you, but, his son was so similar to younger him

🍵 The boy would run up to strangers and make them laugh without a care in the world as Mikey would hide himself deeper in a hoodie while you got your son back to you guys

🍵 But, despite many beliefs, he's a decent father

🍵 Mikey would put some things behind and would play with his son, for example, if his son wanted to mess around with some sock puppets and make a story, Mikey would indulge him and mess with him, making his voice deepen and rise for his son's laugh to erupt

🍵 He does have his faults though, as his work can end up making his son mature faster than a child should, or he could end up saying or doing something that upset you, making his son start disconnecting with him

🍵 Overall, he's a 7.5/10 father, he's good in certain situations and bad in others

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🔪 Sanzu and you have known one another for years, planting the first time you ever met nearly 10 years prior to this one

🔪 When he went through the years of torturous addictions, whether it be to alcohol or drugs that he somehow got a hold of through means even you didn't know of, you were always there to pull him away

🔪 Because of those issues, he had no idea why you settled for him of all people, you were so beautiful, you could've gotten with any other member of Bonten, maybe even his own boss

🔪 But, you settled with him, the guy who had nearly overdosed from his drugs and alcohol multiple times

🔪 While pushing those hateful thoughts of himself to the back of his brain, Sanzu had gone through multiple attempts of rehabilitation, and after a few failures and your threat of leaving him, he began taking it seriously, he loves you and he needs you to be there

🔪 It took a while, but, once he made it to your first milestone of a year of sobriety, you gave him a reward, which led to something bigger than expected

🔪 You had gotten pregnant, leaving Sanzu is shock, and his brain nearly, nearly, slipped away to him grabbing a large bottle of whiskey and wine mixed with a large bag of his old drugs

🔪 In the midst of his panic-attack, it took Kakucho's words of affirmation with his boss' assurance of him getting a form of paternity leave to just calm him down

🔪 He takes excellent care of you during your pregnancy, and that carried onto him as a father, to a degree, that is

🔪 When you went into labor, he was panicking badly, he had nearly passed out when you began to scream in pain, and during this mass of chaos, the doctor had to usher Ran and Rindou to take him out of the room

🔪 Hearing your screams of agony stop made his heart sink, what happened? Were you okay? How was his baby? Oh God, what if he lost you and the baby?! How would he live with himself?!

" Mr. Haruchiyo, your wife and daughter are in perfect condition. Would you like to come and see them? " " Yes! I- I mean, yes, please. "

🔪 When he held your daughter for the first time, he swore on his life he would protect you guys from everything, including himself. And, that day, he swore to stay sober for good. No fuck ups this time, he couldn't, no, he wouldn't risk harming his child and his own wife

🔪 Ever since your daughter was born, the rest of Bonten began to hide their deals from your home more often, by orders of Mikey, since, he knew how a traumatizing childhood can affect someone

🔪 Sanzu loves to play with her, for example, at just a few months old until she was around maybe seven years old, he would pick her up and toss her in the air for him to catch

🔪 Unlike Mikey, Sanzu doesn't really fear anyone harming his child, if they were a boy that is, he has a full-fledged belief that boys are far more feared than women, so, whenever his daughter starts talking to a stranger, he glares from behind her to make sure that random guy didn't even attempt touching her

🔪 He definitely tries holding back his tears during her first day of school, or really during any massive part of her life, especially when she graduated and moved out, his baby was so old now... he's getting back pain!

" Dad... I'm just moving across the street in another apartment, don't worry! I'll come see you and Mom whenever I can! Please don't cry! " " I'm not crying about that! Your Mother swat a fly earlier, I feel bad for the fly! "

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❤️‍🔥 This guy is the definition of husband and father material, that I cannot deny

❤️‍🔥 When you guys started dating, he always had the idea of your future, from marriage to having children, whenever he would come home from a fight all injured, he would ask you if this was what you really wanted

❤️‍🔥 Did you really want to be with him? For crying out loud, he could get possibly killed at any time! This especially set in when you guys lost Izana (I believe that still happens... correct me if I'm wrong!)

❤️‍🔥 It still shocks him to this day on the fact you married him, he worked for Bonten, a gang very well known for their heinous actions, all members, including Kakucho himself, have done horrible things, how could you look him in the eye, nonetheless propose having children?

❤️‍🔥 You really surprise him at every turn, don't you?

❤️‍🔥 He smiled and gave you the thumbs up. Thankfully, it didn't take very long for you to find out you were pregnant, and as your stomach grew, he read many books on parenthood, he couldn't risk his child having a childhood as rough as he did

❤️‍🔥 When you went into labor, he was scared out of his mind, all of a sudden the floor was wet and you were heaving over in pain, leaving him to carry you bridal-style as he ran to Bonten's doctor

" I think they're in labor, Doctor! " " Girls! Get her in the delivery room, stat! "

❤️‍🔥 Hearing you scream in pain made him flinch as Kokonoi and Takeomi tried keeping him from busting down the door to comfort you

❤️‍🔥 Once the doctor came outside of the room and asked for him to come inside, he burst past the man dressed in scrubs and hugged you as you laid on the bed with a blanket in your arms

❤️‍🔥 You hushed him and held up your baby girl's head, and when your husband laid eyes on his daughter, he began to tear up, he really started crying was when she gripped his finger with her tiny fist

❤️‍🔥 You guys really made this? How surprising is this, huh?

❤️‍🔥 As your son grew up, Kakucho adores messing with her hair, he always had his in a buzz-cut as he grew older, so, whenever she asked for him to braid her hair when she was small, he obliged and gave her such a cute hairstyle!

❤️‍🔥 Kakucho obligates his family in first place alongside his work, though, since he was one of the top four people in Bonten, he got quite busy, but, he always tries pushing it all away as best as he could

❤️‍🔥 Thankfully, Mikey was more lenient with that since he knew of Kakucho's family-oriented life

❤️‍🔥 He is definitely one of the best fathers in the Tokyo Revengers Universe, he wants his child to grow up in a world where they feel wanted, and that roots deep with his own childhood

❤️‍🔥 This guy is also very protective, he's lost so many people, his best friend, Izana, for example

❤️‍🔥 Anyone tries harming his daughter, there will be hell to pay.

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💰 Kokonoi, much like Kakucho, is still surprised that you wanted to be with him, but, he's also surprised that he was still with you... he believed that after the loss of Akane that he would never love again

💰 Thankfully, when you came into his life during the earlier years of Bonten to help with some issues with relations between gangs, Kokonoi began to bond with you

💰 When he asked you to marry him after a few months of dating and a couple weeks of courting, he remembers exactly how you smiled when you confirmed you wanted the same as him

💰 Kokonoi has enough resources to care for his family, so, when you proposed having children, he wasn't very worried about expenses, this guy knows so many ways of making money that even the richest people in the world would be baffled

💰 He was very excited when you found out you were having a baby, nonetheless when it was found out to be twins

💰 During your early months of pregnancy, he would grab everything for female babies and male babies, since the gender was hard to tell until your fifth month

💰 This guy was on cloud nine when notified you were both genders

💰 Now he doesn't have to worry about Mikey being mad that he bought so much male and female items for these babies

💰 Anyways, when you eventually went into labor, Kokonoi was as calm as a butterfly on the outside, while on the inside he was like a swarm of angry geese, thoughts flying faster than the snitch in Harry Potter

💰 He stayed in the room with you, allowing you to squeeze his hand, despite the immense pain you were bringing to his hands, he probably was getting bruises from your hold

💰 When the sounds of your first baby's cries entered his ears, he swore he forgot all about the pain in his hands, but, when his daughter came out just a few minutes later, his heart swooned

💰 If you've seen Friends, you might be familiar when Frank Jr. ran out to the gang and was yelling about his first child's birth, oh yeah, he definitely does that

" Yes! We have the first one down! I cannot believe I have a son... oh God! I have a Hajime Jr.! " " Has your wife even agreed to that name, Kokonoi? " " Nope! "

💰 Kokonoi held his son, whom you had to turn down his ideas of naming him Hajime Jr., and you held your daughter, and you had to turn down him naming her Sanzu-ia, he loves pissing Sanzu off too much...

💰 As your babies grew up, Kokonoi spoiled them beyond belief, and you had to hold him back from doing something stupid, like buying a TV show because his little baby girl wanted to meet a character she loved

💰 While the two grew up, he, much like Sanzu, cries at mass events for them, but, unlike Sanzu, he doesn't try holding himself back from showing his emotions to his children, prompting their embarrassment and you laughing at their antics

" Dad... please stop crying, God you're so embarrassing me... " " I can't! My babies are growing up so fast! Can you believe that just eighteen years ago you're mother was pushing you out of her- " " DAD! "

[fyodordostoevskeys]

It’s a lot! But I took my time writing these!

(ooc: the ones about love aren’t directed at anyone, literally just exploring the concept of love as a whole. The ——— section off different poems)

I am forever trapped

A slave to my mind

I thought I learned how to adapt 

Yet it appears I was just blind

This everlasting boredom consumes me

It’s a gaping whole that keeps growing

And I can’t flee

My thoughts just keep slowing 

I want to bash my head 

To get up and find a means with no end

To be able to not be bound by dread

But no matter, when everything will always blend 

———

I wish I could love you the way I crave you

To tear into your throat with my jaws

And rip you apart as you scream

I want to unravel you

Learn every bit of you from the inside out

I want to ravage your flesh like it’s last meal

Tear out your heart and keep it for myself

I want to break you down 

Then build back up piece by piece

I want to keep you bound

Stuck to my side by possession

———

Fallen Angel

You’re a beauty among beauties

Blood befit for royalty 

You are graced by the gods

The darling among the heavens

The example among the sinners

You are free beyond the mind 

You know no bounds

Never touched by the desire of sin

You are loved by all

I hate you

———

I’ve been wanting

Reaching out blindly

Just barely grasping 

I was born wanting

In an endless oasis

Yet I can’t quench my yearning

With a heavy heart and a tainted soul

I claw for more

Yet nothing ever seems to fill this hole

I’m reaching out desperately 

Trying to find what I’m searching for

Yet any time I find it, I lose it abruptly 

I’m searching, unsure of what I’m looking for

I’ve come close, but it’s never enough

Now all I am is covered in my own gore

The oasis is tainted with blood

Is it mine or someone else’s?

It doesn’t matter, there will be a flood

———

My god

I offer my devotion

Forged through love and pain

I will never waver

You are the light I see at the end

I want you to be the one to free me form my sin

My god

You are the most divine

A god among gods

I will follow you forever

Worship the very ground you walk upon

I will tear myself apart if you told me to

My god

I will be your prophet

Preach of you at any chance I get

I will be your martyr

Dying in your hands as I carry my belief

My god

I am your most faithful worshipper

I will be anything you wish

I will do anything you ask

I put you above everyone, a divinity among hell

Blessing me with such care

(ooc: hoping this doesn’t accidentally send twice cus our internet sucks rn</3)

...oh my... amazing!

You definitely have talent.

You should keep writing.

[yntcdtyler]

so here’s my lover secret session’s story... 02/08/2019 london 🏹🇬🇧

i got my dm on twitter on july 16th at 5:15pm and i looked at it thinking someone was trying to boo boo the fool me and it was really gonna say something like “stream ME!” so i opened it not thinking much of it and my heart literally SANK when i saw it was actually REAL. i got the phone call 4 days after from a girl called sara who was from Taylor Nation, she told me everything and i was literally in the storage room in work crying.

so it’s finally august 2nd.. i got up at 5am cause i literally had 4 different trains and 2 ubers to catch, when i finally got to my hotel it was around 11am, i checked in and got ready and went to the meeting point. i was literally the first one there so i panicked thinking i was at the wrong place but more people started to show up and immediately everyone formed little friendship groups who they seemed to have stayed with the whole day which was insane. i met lisa and emma which i’d recognised from twitter because we’d been following each other for so long and then georgia, evie & shiv all came over and we all just bonded and instantly became friends and realised we we’re the brits of the group, there were SO many international fans and it was amazing seeing people come from all over the world! our group was first on the bus and i’m not sure why but we were literally all crying like wtf was going on?? we drove past a few ambulances thinking ‘that’s gonna be our ride home after tonight’ cause at this point i’m like dying and then we finally got to THE HOUSE.

we all go inside, the ME! playlist was on, there was a huge moose head on the wall which we all became really intrigued by, a huge mirror to see ourselves ugly crying, there was food & drinks and little m&m’s with ‘lover’ and hearts on them and i have no idea what was going on in my mind at this point, like i didn’t know what to expect.

so then we all go to the living room we’re there was a bunch of cushions on the floor and a chair and speakers in front of us and i KNEW what was about to go down lads, it’s about to happen, we’re about to hear lover and i just wasn’t ready and i was sat THERE in front of the chair and a few minutes later... SHE COMES OUT FROM BEHIND THIS DOOR LOOKING LIKE LIKE AN ACTUAL GODDESS THAT JUST STEPPED OUT OF HEAVEN AND I DEAD ASS DIED RIGHT THERE THINKING ABOUT THAT AMBULANCE I SAW EARLIER ON CAUSE SHE JUST WASNT REAL. so she’s like “welcome to the lover secret sessions” and the noise that came out me was actually not human at all. she played half the album the first and kept apologising for ranting and going off topic which was so funny, she’s so adorable i was literally in awe. then was like “we’re gonna take a break so you can all go the bathroom, have a drink and stretch your legs” and then mentions she’s made us treats and everyone’s like OMG and she’s literally like “it’s just rice crispy treats i dyed in heart shapes” and it was just the funniest thing bc she’s just so sarcastic but they were the cutest things and just knowing she spent time making them was honestly insane. like i ate a rice crispy heart treat..made by taylor swift? sounds fake. so then as she’s passing them around, she’s goes into the garden and starts talking to everyone and thanking people’s parents and let everyone on her trampoline and just shouts “THESE ARE MY KIDS” with a glass of wine in her hand and it was such a taylor swift moment. it was just surreal like wtf? imagine bouncing on taylor swifts trampoline? i would’ve went on it but i wasn’t about to break my neck before listening to the rest of the album x

okay so we go back in to listen to the rest of the album and throughout the whole album listening part, i just kept crying and she kept looking at me and smiling and singing and i was just bloody in shock. there was one point during a song we’re me and georgia we’re holding onto each other crying and she just looks at us and tilts her head and gives us the most warming smile. right there we both died together it was unreal. but the album HOLY SHIT every song was INSANE. i found it so hard to pick a favourite so i have 3, this album is literally her BEST, and this coming from a speak now stan🤝 i was just the happiest i’ve ever been, it just seemed like a dream. seeing her sat there in front of me so happy and in such a good place, feeling so proud of this album and these songs just made my heart feel so full. what i was feeling in that moment is unexplainable. just pure happiness like i knew life doesn’t get any better than this... right it’s time for the meet and greets and everyone goes back in to the other room whilst they got ready and people started queuing then to go in and meet her, she spent so much time with every single person and seeing everyone’s faces coming out that room was so magical. the event was supposed to be over at 11pm and it’s literally 1:30am when it was my time to meet her. she’d literally been meeting people for HOURS and is 2 and half hours past the end time and she didn’t even mind. everyone was so eager to go inside that me and the girls decided to wait till the end.

so evie had just come out and now it’s my turn. i almost fainted, i was so dizzy and nervous and WHEN I TELL U I WAS PETRIFIED TO GO INSIDE, I ACTUALLY MEAN IT BECAUSE I WAS STOOD OUTSIDE THE DOOR REFUSING TO GO IN FOR ABOUT A MINUTE CAUSE I COULD JUST SEE HER STOOD THERE AND I WASN’T READY BECAUSE LIKE I’VE DREAMT ABOUT THIS MOMENT SINCE FOREVER. emma and lisa we’re stood there laughing trying to force me inside as well as a girl from TN. took me a good minute but i finally walked in, i walk over to her trying not to cry AGAIN and she’s stood there smiling at me and she says to me “it’s tyler isn’t it?” and i was like JDJSKDJD “yeah 😭😭😭😭” cause i didn’t think she knew who i was and i was just randomly picked by TN??? she then pulled me in for the biggest hug and i just felt like this is it, i’m gonna bloody pass out. I TOLD HER THAT WAITING IN THAT QUEUE TO MEET HER WAS LIKE WAITING FOR THE ELECTRIC CHAIR and i was like why tf did i just say that omg but she laughed and was like “omg hahaha it’s like waiting for the electric chair that’s so funny” then i gave her the lover necklace i’d gotten made for her so we had matching and she kept saying how much she loved and how beautiful it was. then said “i love your necklace” with a little smirk because i was wearing her ‘TS’ initial necklace and my heart just went HDAJHDJDDH. then she asked did i enjoy the day and i was like of course??? it was so amazing i couldn’t stop crying and she was like “aw i had so much fun, i love doing these” and then she asked how i’d gotten here and i told her that i had to take 4 trains and she looked so shocked and thanked me for doing that and asked if i was travelling afterwards and i told her i had a hotel and she goes “omg good, PLEASE don’t talk to any strangers” and i’m just like YEAH OF COURSE ANYTHING FOR U MISS SWIFT :’)))) i hugged her about 3 more times and i asked her about tour, and how she found me and she said she’d found me on tumblr and literally said “its tylovestaylor right?” and i was just like WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK. IM SCARED. cause i barely use tumblr because i’m the only one who reblogs myself??? and i’d gotten my dm on twitter so my mind was like wtf is going on right now?? i told her i changed my url and she said she’d follow me 🥺 then says “so do you wanna like... take a picture together or something?” YEAH OF COURSE, IM A BIT OF A MESS RN BUT ABSOLUTELY. she asks what i wanted to do for the photo like stand, sit, go near the piano? and i told her to choose because my mind was just all over the place and she says to me “i think one sitting down with our legs crossed over acting all (then does some pose) and stuff” i just couldn’t believe what was actually happening. we sit down next to each other and she grabs my hand and i’m just holding her and the photographer takes the photo and she tells me to have a look to see if i like it and i said i looked so bad and she goes “ITS SO CUTE, YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL AND PHOTOGENIC” then the photographer told me i was really photogenic and tay goes “SEE SHE EVEN SAID IT” did taylor swift..who invented photos and beauty... just call me beautiful and photogenic? surely not. so we took one more pic and she said she loved it so i loved it😭😭😭 we got up and hugged again and i just kept saying i love you and she told me i was beautiful and i was like SO ARE U???? and then i told her that i still don’t believe she’s real and she laughed. we hugged again i told her i loved her as i was walking out she shouts “please get home safely” and i said “have a safe flight wherever you’re going next” at the same time and she laughed and was like “OMG THANKYOU?” and i walked out and the emotions i was going through oh my god. i’d just met my favourite person in the entire world? like never in a million years did i think i’d ever meet her let alone get handpicked for secret sessions. i was in so much shock like it wasn’t real. that never happened? i’m still in shock now and literally crying writing this. she was so lovely and welcoming and spoke to me like she’d known me forever.

AND AFTER ALL THAT, SHE DECIDES SHE WANTS ME LITERALLY DEAD AND LIKES MY POST ON HERE FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. RIGHT AFTER I’D MET HER.

i couldn’t get over how beautiful she is, inside and out like i already knew that but seeing her in real life is so different, she’s literally flawless and so cute and delicate and i’ll literally die for this woman. thankyou so much, from the bottom of my heart @taylorswift for choosing me out of 100m+ fans, i’ll never understand why i was chosen but i can’t explain how grateful i am. it was by far the best day i’ve ever had in my 18 years of being alive, nothing will ever come close to that moment. i cant wait for everyone else to hear this album, i miss you and your hugs already and i forgot to tell you because my mind was blank but i’m insanely proud of you and will support you forever. promise.

[guessmonsta]

Kuroo x Reader- Wingman

Inconsistency is key. Everything I write is for my dear friend Emily. Anyway, here’s some fun, low-key raunchy, high-key reference-y Kuroo content for everyone in quarantine rn. Stay safe and wash your hands <3

Kuroo was, at some point tonight, going to lose his mind. 

He knew showing up to Bokuto’s stupid little “house party” was going to get him in trouble one way or another. By “house party”, Bokuto meant he was going to try to cram the volleyball team starters, his roommates basketball friends, a couple of girls, and miscellaneous friends on the side into his college campus dorm room. 

It ideally didn’t sound like much fun, but he was going to take whatever chance he got to get out of his dorm. As much as Kuroo got out in high school, in college he felt bound to chemistry textbooks and volleyball practice. He liked to joke around with his friends and say it wasn’t easy being smart, athletic, and sexy, but there really wasn’t anything sexy about under eye bags and lab goggles. 

He usually showed up to Bokuto’s dorm before anyone else did. His roommate was out of town, so it was just some volleyball guys and a few others for the night. Kuroo didn’t really mind, the basketball guys were too much to handle for him right now, anyway. A cluster headache started forming behind his right eye, and he must’ve made a stank face, because Bokuto started stifling laughter from the bed across the room. 

“Do you have to go take a shit or something?” He asked, picking up a pillow from the bed and chucking it at Kuroo’s head. 

“Nah. I’m just starting to think I peaked in high school.” 

“See? This is why you should’ve majored in business like me. I keep it cool, I keep it classy. I focus on three things, volleyball, whatever business majors do, and boobs.” Bokuto made a gesture as if he was flipping hair over his shoulder. Kuroo shook his head. 

“When I come up with a cure for stupidity twenty years down the line, you’re not getting any of it.” Kuroo stuck his tongue out, and Bokuto feigned shock. 

“I thought we were bros.” 

“Bros support bros. And you’ve gotta support me through fucking-” Kuroo took a deep sigh then exhaled, “Chemistry-y.” 

“Hey listen, you sound like a big major bum right now and it’s making me wanna hit you with another pillow.” 

“Do it, I dare you.” Kuroo grabbed the pillow previously thrown at his head, and spiked it back over at Bokuto, who dodged it. 

“I’ve got some cool people coming over though.” Bokuto exclaimed while contemplating on throwing the pillow back.

“Oh, like the guy who chugged three beers in a row last time and puked all over that one girls lap? And you had to calm her down from crying because All Star started playing from Shrek on the TV and we all were holding back laughter so she wouldn’t cry harder?” 

Bokuto made a face of disgust in response. “Absolutely not. It’s just gonna be me, you, Tendou ‘cause he’s got the goods, Ushijima ‘cause he makes me think god might just be a man, Yukie ‘cause she makes me remember god is actually a woman, a couple of Yukie’s girl friends ‘cause girl power, and __ too ‘cause she didn’t come last time and I miss her.” 

__ was Kuroo and Bokuto’s mutual friend they met in their first semester of college. She sat with them during their freshman orientation course, and they hit it off from there. She was a funny thing, always had bright eyes and a smile on her face. Kuroo noticed his cluster headache wasn’t as bad as he previously thought. 

There was definitely something about her that made Kuroo wish he had time for a serious relationship. Even then, he would make all the time in the world for her if he really could. He hadn’t seen her for a couple months- his only contact with her was sharing memes back and forth on Instagram. The thought of seeing her again made something flutter in his stomach. 

“Oh wait.” Bokuto must have noticed the look on Kuroo’s face, because he started laughing. “O-oh man I forgot you had a thing for __!” 

“I haven’t seen her in forever bro.” Kuroo looked up at Bokuto and fake pouted his lower lip. “Like if I could make that one puppy eye emoji face in real life I would do it.” 

“Awh, does somebody have a cwush?” Bokuto teased in a baby voice. 

“Yes.” He replied, in the same fashion. Then a smile extended on his face. 

“Du-ude if you told me __ was coming over I would’ve made myself look nicer. I’ve been wearing the same gray joggers for like, three days.” 

“College do be doing that to you, doe.” Bokuto got up, then flopped on the couch next to Kuroo. “Listen though, I’m your number one wing man. I gotchu.” 

“Do you mean that, bro?”

“Always, bro.” 

Without knocking, Tendou burst through the dorm door, holding a big brown bag of god knows what under his arm. 

“Your king has arrived.” He announced, and Ushijima awkwardly followed in behind him, muttering a respectful, “hello.” 

“I’m sorry, did I walk in on something… intimate?” Tendou glanced over at Kuroo and Bokuto, who were sitting closely together on the couch. 

“No bro, we’re just two bros, sitting on a dorm couch, one inch apart cause we’re comfortable with our sexuality.” Kuroo winked, and Tendou clutched at his heart in mock embarrassment. 

Yukie and her friends followed soon after, all carrying different bags of chips. 

“Just so y’all know.” Yukie announced, “All this food? It’s mine. None of you can touch it.” 

“Would you trade the bag of popcorn for a brownie?” Tendou winked. Yukie tilted her head, and nodded slightly. 

“I’ll see. Our offer still stands.” 

Another widespread conversation started, something about which movie to watch this time, or something along the lines of that. He heard “Bee Movie” and “Shrek 2”, but nothing more. All he could really think about was when __ was going to show up. He felt stupid for feeling nervous about seeing her again, especially when they were always so comfortable with each other. He had to stretch to try to calm the butterflies down in his stomach. 

Then there was a knock at the door. Bokuto quickly kicked him in the shin as a sign to stand up and get the door. Kuroo shot him a look, to which he only stuck his tongue out. Why the hell did he feel nervous getting the door for her? As far as he knew, they were only friends, just buddies, just bros. But god, even if he was dying to see her, he was sure hesitant to open that door. 

One he did, he was met with a bright smile and a playful punch to the forearm. 

“Aye!” She exclaimed, quick to then pull him into a quick hug. “I haven’t seen you in forever!” 

“I know! What happened, __? What have you been up to?” Kuroo was almost hesitant to hug her back, but allowed himself to for it. His hand creeped into her hair and he allowed himself to exhale deeply. Whatever was remaining of his headache from before vanished. 

“Man, it’s been the absolute pits. I’ve been swamped with work ‘cause of the new semester.” 

“Well, I’ve-” Kuroo caught himself quick before he could continue. “Bokuto and I have missed you a lot.” 

“Awh, really?” She chuckled. “I missed your dumbasses too.” 

She set her jacket down by everyone else’s, then was quick to take a seat next to Bokuto, who already pulled her into a hug and ruffled her hair. He was saying something to her, but Kuroo didn’t hear it. There was a quiet white static in the back of his mind that was dragging him in and out of reality. “The Road To El Dorado” was playing on TV. Who’s executive decision was this, again? 

Kuroo sat down next to __, and Tendou and two of Yukie’s friends sat down too. The couch was definitely too small for six people, but somehow they were making it work. Tendou was pretty much half a person, anyway. But what Tendou didn’t have, Bokuto definitely made up for.  Kuroo then noticed that he was right up against __’s body, and it took a lot of power in him to keep his cool. She had really nice thighs, really nice thighs that were touching his. He wondered if she knew that, that she had nice thighs. It was definitely a terrible day to be wearing gray joggers. 

Kuroo then quickly assessed the situation in his head. On one side of him, there was the prettiest girl he had ever seen. She was dressed in this cute little oversized sweater and she smelled like a mix of pretty girl and coffee shop. On the other side of him, was Tendou, who didn’t nearly have half the sex appeal as __, so it was a conflicting situation for Kuroo for sure. 

“To pop a boner, or to not pop a boner, that is the question.” Kuroo thought to himself, then immediately made a face at his own thought. “Tetsurou, you’re so weird. You’re acting so weird right now.” 

Kuroo then looked over at __, who was now watching the movie with what seemed like half interest, half confusion. 

She really did look like an angel. 

“Tetsurou, do you hear yourself? Do you even hear yourself?” 

She then leaned her head against his arm, and he heard Bokuto snicker quietly, and shoot him a look. He could see his face out of the corner of his eyes, but refused to look over at him. 

“Oh my god, Tetsurou, you’re gonna pop a boner. You’re gonna pop a boner because she’s touching you and she’s so pretty- Do I go to the bathroom? Should we go to the bathroom?” 

Kuroo noticed her look up at him, and he was quick to catch her eye. 

“Is this bothering you?” She muttered. 

“Nah.” He smiled. “I get it, chicks dig these volleyball arms.” 

__ giggled quietly, and her attention was directed back to the movie. 

“Chicks dig these volleyball arms? Are you KIDDING me right now?” 

A couple more minutes passed in silence. There was a quiet mumbled conversation between Tendou and Yukie about those brownies, but Kuroo toned it out quickly. Suddenly, __ announced. 

“Y’all know what? Honestly? Tulio could get it.” 

Kuroo watched as Bokuto quickly shifted, and cleared his throat to reply, 

“Don’t you think Tulio kinda looks like Kuroo?” 

__ lifted her head up from Kuroo’s shoulder and looked at him, to which he tried to hold back a smile. Bokuto might not have been the smoothest wingman, but he made it work. 

“Oh shit, you’re right. I can see it.” 

Kuroo then sat there, saying absolutely nothing. He knew if he said something his voice would probably crack. There was nothing sexy at all about being related to a cartoon character, but it was kind of sexy that she said that he looked like a cartoon character that could get it. In some fragment of his mind, he started thinking about how she could totally get it. One of his arms slowly and inconspicuously fell between his legs. With the other, he flashed a quick peace sign and made a kissy face. 

Oh my god, he was gonna die tonight.

“__, do you think Kuroo could get it too?”

“I, for one, definitely think Kuroo could get it.” Tendou announced. Well, there goes his pants issue. 

“Thank you, bro.” Kuroo managed to spit out. 

“Kuroo could get it.” Ushijima muttered from the ground, which was the most anyone had gotten out of him all night. 

“I dunno, he’s not my type. But in the perfect world he could get it.” Yukie laughed.

“I mean shit.” __ shrugged. He wasn’t sure if it was from the lighting, or what, but Kuroo noticed her face flush red. “Yeah Kuroo could get it.” 

And pants. 

There was a wavering silence for another half hour. He was still hyper aware of her leg touching his, and every other minute detail about his setting, despite the movie. What was the movie even about, anyway?  It was about halfway through, then __ announced, 

“I have to go pee.” 

“Thank you.” Bokuto muttered in reply. 

As she stood up, Kuroo found himself grabbing her hand. 

“Hey, lemme go with you.”

“To… to pee?”

“No this, this is a guys dorm. You don’t wanna get lost going down to the general bathrooms and get caught by somebody.” Kuroo stammered slightly, but followed her out of the room. “You never know what kind of guys there are out there.”

“Awh, are you protecting me?” She cooed, bumping into his side lightly.

“Yeah. I am.” He shot her a quick smile, then looked away. His heart was pounding in his chest. This was the perfect opportunity to back her up against the wall and just kiss her, or something, but he couldn't find it in him to do it. 

People always liked to say he was the sexy friend. The attractive friend. The lady killer. The sex god. He had absolutely none of that, and it showed. 

“Hey, uhm, I hope you didn’t think it was weird when I said you could get it.” 

“Hey, hey, no offense taken.” He chuckled. “I’m just offended you weren’t serious.” 

The moment he said that, he quickly regretted it. She started laughing, but was quick to stop. 

“Wait, are you serious?” 

Kuroo then stopped walking and sighed, almost dramatically. 

“Listen.” 

“Listening.” 

He noticed her clasp her hands together underneath her baggy sweater sleeves. He inhaled sharply, then exhaled. 

“You’re really important to me. As a friend and as a human being.” Kuroo watched her sniffle, and her face go red. “I would use a stupid pickup line on you right now but I’m way too nervous. I really like you, __.” 

He watched a goofy smile spread across her cheeks. Her face only got redder as she looked down at her feet, then back up at him. 

“I never knew if you liked me or not cause you jokingly hit on everyone.” She smiled. “I like you too. I thought I made it pretty obvious.” 

“Oh my god, come here.” Kuroo then scooped her up in a hug, and placed a soft, tentative kiss on her lips. She stumbled a little bit, and he backed her up against the wall. He pulled away for a brief second to chuckle, then kissed her again, his heart slamming against his rib cage. He couldn't believe he actually did it, after all this time of pinning and waiting over her texts- 

__ then pulled away, but not before planting a soft kiss on his nose. 

“I like this a lot, Kuroo, but I still have to pee.” 

[andimackismycrack]

halloweenies - tj and cyrus dress up as richie and eddie

thanks to the suggestion from @tyrusendgameperiod here is this last minute halloween-themed fic! hope you enjoy!

“I don’t want it to look like we just scrambled it together last minute! We’re already behind on planning as is.” Cyrus sighed in his own dramatic Cyrus way.

TJ looked at him, rolling his eyes, “Cy, it’s September 3rd.”

“Which means we’re WAY behind!”

“Don’t worry underdog,” TJ ruffled Cyrus’s hair, getting a smack on the hand in return, “I have a plan.” Sure enough, TJ came through. He surprised Cyrus with ‘IT: Chapter Two’ tickets for opening night the following week.

Cyrus couldn’t stop gushing about it. He was so excited. You wouldn’t think it, but he was a horror movie buff, the theater was the one place he wasn’t afraid, besides when he was with his friends or TJ. He’d seen the first IT about 10 times, he’d even forced TJ to watch it with him a few of those.

TJ had been wracking his brain for cute couples costume ideas, and couldn’t think of anything. Until...

｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Opening night, they were walking out of the theater. As they left, you could see almost every audience member with streaky tears dried on their face or puffy eyes from crying. Including Cyrus and TJ.

“Teej,” Cyrus whispered, “That was so good, thank you.”

TJ felt that warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest and slid his arm around Cyrus’s waist, holding him snugly. They started talking about their favorite parts of the movie and that’s when it clicked. They had been talking about Richie and Eddie so much, it was obvious. Clearly that’s what they have to dress up as.

Weeks went by and Cyrus was getting increasingly anxious about their costume. He trusted TJ and all when he said that he was taking care of them, but he couldn’t help but worry about it.

TJ decided to choose a pink hawaiian style shirt with a white graphic tee underneath and jeans for Richie. Of course he also found coke bottle glasses and beat up tennis shoes.

For Eddie, he chose some red shorts (though not near as short as the ones in the movie) and a color-clashing salmon polo-style shirt. He found a fanny pack from his dad in the 90’s and an old inhaler from his mom.

TJ was proud of his selection, most of which he’d gotten from a thrift store. All but the jeans (which he’d already owned) and the glasses. He’d saved up for this with his job, being able to pay for it all himself. He got a text.

underdog! <3: pleeeaassseeee tell me what the costume is i’m dying!!!!!

underdog! <3: tj!

underdog! <3: tj!! i know it’s a surprise but please..

tj: okay fine i’ll give you a HINT

underdog! <3: bf of the week award!

tj: why not month??

underdog! <3: if you told me the whole costume, you might even make boyfriend of the year.

tj: okay okay. i can’t resist, you’re being too cute rn.

underdog! <3: omg!

tj: it’s richie & eddie! from IT!

｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Halloween was fast approaching for the couple, both so excited for their idea. The plan was to all meet at Cece’s house, then all go trick or treating together. They wanted to go out with a bang since it’s probably the last year they could all go. Then when they were back, they would have their candy, watch scary movies, and fall asleep in the living room. Though Halloween was a school night, they had the following day off as it was the end of a grading period, meaning the teachers would have to be at school while the students would not.

The fact that they gang didnt have school the next day, their parents were happy to agree for them to stay at Andi’s grandma’s house.

Before they knew it, Andi, Buffy, Amber, Marty, Jonah, Walker (despite all the drama, they were able to stay friends), Marty, TJ, and Cyrus made their ways to Cece’s, already in costume.

First came Buffy and Marty, in a couples costume of course, with Buffy dressed in old fashioned, pop-art like clothing, carrying an umbrella in gloved hands, and Marty with “dirt” covering his hands and wiped on his face, wielding a black umbrella with overalls and a striped shirt.

“Welcome, Mary Poppins!” Andi, a glittery fairy, welcomed Buffy and Marty into Cece’s house, spiders were hanging from the ceiling and there were orange string lights hung from what seemed every wall in the house.

Soon, the rest of the guests had began piling in. Jonah and Walker decided to go as Finn and Po from the newest Star Wars trilogy. Amber was dressed as a hippie, sporting straightened hair, a tank top tucked into flowing pants, and a headband across her forehead.

TJ and Cyrus were last to arrive, they took “forever” to get there according to the rest of the gang.

The doorbell rang and Andi jumped up to answer it, leaving the others sitting on the couch with a bowl of chips.

She opened the door to see TJ as Eddie and Cyrus as Richie. “Oh my god! You guys look... amazing!!”

Buffy was next to jump from her warm seat next to (more like, on top of) Marty. “Okay we HAVE to take pictures now!” She motioned over to a blank wall with a sheet hung. There was a photo booth set up complete with confetti and paper moustaches.

The rest of the night faded into oblivion as the once trio laughed too hard and enjoyed themselves so much, they didn’t know where the time went.

notes: i wrote this very last minute i’m SORRY but i kinda love this. didn’t u love the plot twist? also i’m sOFT for tj when he broke down and told cyrus bc he was being cute. might write a part two over the weekend for when they’re actually trick or treating with more dialogue (bc fun fact dialogue is my favorite part to write). hope you enjoy!!! <3

[facelessdreamer]

Fuck

I hate my mum so fucking much. I shouldn't but I feel it. I’m just so fucking mad because she’s she. I fucking fuck o my god I just arghhhhhgggggfhshgskwwj fucking ARGHHGGGGGGGGHHHHHH the fuck she make me do things? Why the fuck does whatever she say to me piss me off this much. I don’t give a shit about her words and constant nonsense about the same shit okay! And why the fuck does she drag something on for so long?! You can always always always fucking see I’m in the middle of some shit. Whether it’s tv or fucking all set to leave the house. Yet you’ll fucking talk and keep me from it. And I always try so fucking hard to just stand or sit there and hear your fucking shit I don't wanna hear. I don’t listen. I just hear bc that’s all I can naturally do. Seriously the shit she talks about with me doesn’t ever interest me and Ive no energy or will for it. I just wanna go on about my life and never be stopped for a minute. I have my own wars beefing me in here already. I barely fucking watch tv either. Today’s my day off in like absolute fucking ages. I hadn’t spent a day at home for weeks and she's out here talking on the phone needing the tv volume low and being her usual loud on the phone and I can’t hear shit on the tv? but when she watches tv were not allowed to make a fucking sound? only double standards from this woman aggravate me on a level as high as this. Later she even hoovers in the same room for 15 fucking minutes, are you dumb? It’s not a fucking mile long mate why take that long I'm building all this shit load of adrenaline and already fuming after 5 minutes of her presence with this clutter. I watched her the whole time instead bc she was blocking the fucking tv and sound with the bloody Hoover noise so I was forced to see all this instead. All I wanted was to watch this single programme man. that's all. it may not matter in 2 days or 5 years but I wanted this, for now, for the moment I desired this. So tell my why tf does it take that long to Hoover this small space in our living room? I swear the longer she took outside of 5 minutes pissed me the fucck offf and I was just there sitting, building samosas and fuming. I really couldn't help it. this part of my life everything made my blood boil. my mother was sitting at top throne of that fucking trigger mate. Fucking hell the way I always hold shit in with her just takes me soo mad I can’t even explain. All my nerves will explode and I could die. 

My fucking 7 year old shit of a little cunt sister pissed me off as well too. Several times today. I was watching tv during the time my mum made me come down and make somosas while she was also talking on the phone like I said. I wanted her to just leave bc I couldn’t hear the tv and she also made us minimise the volume. The fucking nerve. Anyway I make her leave when there’s not much left to do with the somosas now. I switch to the plus one channel bc I wanna watch the whole royal programme again hearing every word of it and I can get what I wanted out of today finally. But noooooo now this little cunt who refused to leave the room now too kept making a million loud and unnecessary fucking noises and I was just so astonished at how she was so capable at making so many annoying sounds with her presence. How can she make that much noise in front of my eyes and why were they so heightened. They were bangs and shuffles and paper crunch and jar closing noises. Like I told her several times nicely to stop! I can’t hear the tv. And already bc I have to speak out to her underdeveloped brain I was again missing the programme. 

Mums in my room now calmly, like usual utters make sure you put it blah blah so they don’t end up somehow back in the dirty laundry and omdssss it was like bitch why the fuck are you even talking since you came up. I’m mad rn and you’re bursting my fucking bubble again. I was hanging on by a fucking thread and could have gone to bed mad with all that shit I was feeling about her but noooo she came up talking in such a calm manner while I'm so mad and dying the fuck inside. And calm talk when I’m fucking mad coming from the person I’m mad at and especially from my mother again pisses me of like a knife to the gut. My anger and level of resentment it ain’t normal so don’t tp me over the fucking edge but ya did didn't ya! these days breathing even pisses me off so imagine my mother fs. Anyways she now says to me in a subtle manner don’t be angry and just like that, I’ve lost it. I just said something automatically back. I said WHY YOU ALWAYS IN MY STUFF she goes.. who? I say YOUUUU, DONT EVER TOUCH MY SHIT AND STAY OUT IF IT WHY YOU ALWAYS TOUCHING IT AND DONT EVER TOUCH WHATVER IS MINE IN MY ROOM AGAIN Like I’m so mad man bc wtf when I entered my room beforehand I knew instantly shit was touched. My resentment mingled with emotions of anger is mega mega heavy when my shits touched by anyone. Especially this little shit and my mum bc that’s when shit goes missing, things are mistaken for rubbish and then things are misplaced. I don’t like that shit. I don’t. I don’t like it. It pisses me off in a different way. Do not touch my shit. Like noooo I don’t carrrreeee, if you think it’s rubbish I don’t caaaree leavveeeeee it motherfuckering alooooneeee. I don’t care if there’s a dead rat laying in the centre of my room. Do. not. fucking. move. it. My mum yeah comes in and does what she likes. I noticed some things that were different from last I saw it and something that didn’t mean much that I kept she threw away the other day and I picked it up again bc I could have added it to a rubbish collection of mine and today it’s gone again. Are you dumbbbbbb when I noticed that amongst a couple other things like earlier she had my sibling bring down a handful of my Nike socks to put in the wash FUCK SAKE what? Fuckk off now, no! Do nooot dooo that! OMDS fs I was so mad and agitated I don’t like it man like I don’t I could cry. I can’t tell you why it deeply bothers me but it does so please do not touch my shit fucking hell! I don’t care if it’s dirty. I’ll handle it bc I literally decide when to take it down for a wash and until I make that decision and you done it for me? no that's not okay. idk why I get this deep angered feeling man but just fuck off. Then a mention from her the other day saying why do I keep my room so junked with condiments shoved with shit inside, like keep less. And that came about in my head during all this madness so that added to today’s events and why in a burst of anger I said why do you touch my stuff etcetera. She never said nothing and just went down because she knew I was mad now. To her over nothing but to me over fucking everything. It’s a whole days worth of built up anger man and I don’t have the will to go on telling you everything on why I’m mad toward you bc I’ll breakdown form it all and I really don’t want to bc you happen to be my fucking mother and I don’t like later regretting the very true shit I’d say in this state. But it kills not to as I  bottle it up and feel the pain of these unsaid things. better me than you though. 

I balled my eyes out just before writing all this bc I was angry I could not. Got that fucking pain in my neck from holding back the cry. Like reading through it sounds like why did I get so mad and cry about it all. But it was a whole days worth of built up anger and other little things through out so I stood there then in my room for a moment then with all the anger and mean words inside me that I wanted to say out loud that I couldn’t therefore didn’t. I was just feeling it all. Then my dad came up saying whats up, am I mad and stuff like tell me. I kept saying nothing and that each time he said something to me. Bc obviously he heard my tantrum thrown at my mum. Heck the whole house heard. I didn’t scream or yell thaaat loud but it was me in the house who was being angry and throwing a fit today. So yeah after dad left my room door almost closed I sat and I cried silently. I just hate so many things about my mum man. I don’t even think hate is the right word. I just don't wanna be her anything. She is what makes me tick most. The things she says to me about all things and even about me. Like I don’t care. I don’t want to hear it. If I hear it I just get mad I don’t get hurt. or maybe I do get hurt and subliminal ignore the hurt and instantaneously replace it with emotion of severe anger with a lot of resentment. Like it just bothers me I can’t be myself bc she’ll throw the biggest fit and occasionally cry bc you’ll feel so shameful of your daughter being anyway that you don’t want or approve of. Like that’s why i hide so much of me already and have to leave the house before she catches a glimpse of me and come home making sure the same thing. I tread carefully around my mum bc she will throw the ugliest and meanest fits that I cannot allow her to feel or cause vibes in the house bc of. Like it’s too much. So if there’s anything I can do to help that than I will hide and be who I am. It’s all so complicated man. last thing I did was get up before getting in bed and slam my door shut so she can hear know I'm maaaad. it felt good. Hope it have her a shock. 

Like idek why I run to my blog. I just had to let it all out somewhere and I hadn’t cried in forever so that was something.

I’m fucking hungry too. I barely ever eat and there’s nothing to eat. Nothing appetises me at all

Fuck I still feel shit

[thoughtsofdarc]

The Butterfly Effect - Part 5 - The Ex

Bucky Barnes x Reader 

Words: 1450

A/N: This took me forever to write... Almost 4 hours for just about 1500 words. I’m getting so frustrated, that my hands don’t work proberly. The pain ain’t getting worse, so i take that as a good sign, but now it needs to leave, and take the numbness with it too.  Anyway... Enjoy this next chapter - We are working our way through the clichés... But who are we trying to be kidding? They are clichés for a reason right ;)  

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

Bucky is the perfect man. He's sweet and caring, always asking how I'm doing and is actually listening to what I tell him. He's funny and makes me laugh over and over again, the more he can make me laugh the happier he seems to be. He's the perfect gentleman, observant, present and making me feel important, even if I'm talking about boring stuff like laundry.

He's sooo handsome, like taken out of a photo shoot for some high end fashion magazine. Sometimes, I even feel a tad to normal, even boring, compared to him. But he always acts like I'm the most beautiful girl in the world.

Not to mention, he is the best kisser I have ever laid my lips on. He takes my breath away, and makes me longing for more whenever he leaves, giving me butterflies in my stomach just by thinking of him.

Everything I've dreamed of. Except, I'm not really sure where I got him.

"So, have you... you know... done it yet?" Natasha cocks an eyebrow, a teasing smirk on her lips as she sips her coffee.

We are sitting at the coffee shop again, the one where Bucky gave me his number, hidden under a cookie.

I raise my eyebrows in surprise and look around to see if anyone heard her very direct and very private question. Luckily for me, it doesn't seem like anyone is paying us attention.

"No! What, no...? No!" The words come out as a stutter, and I cringe when I hear just how flustered I sound. Way to go y/n, that will definitely make her believe you.

 Natasha laughs as she squints and point a finger at me "You just said no, tree times. Don't hold back on me... how was it?" She leans in, ready to hear all the juicy details. So typically Nat!

 I sigh, deeply as I play with the handle of the coffee mug.

"I'm serious Nat... We haven't. I'm not even sure that we are official. I mean, we've been out more than enough to think we are, but... It's like it never goes any further than dates, holding hands and mind-blowing goodbye kisses" I look at her, sadder than I intent to.

 "Oh Sweetie! I'm sorry... I thought you..." She trails off and I nod, understanding what she means.

"Well, if he can't get his ass in gear and officially make you his, I see no other choice than for us to go out and have some fun tonight. There's this new bar a few blocks from my work and I've been dying to go. It's been ages since the last time we went out, and also this is going to be one of the last times having a girls night out before I officially becomes Mrs. Barton"

 "Nat, I don't know..." I start, but she cuts me off very quickly.

"Y/n, I'm not saying you have to find another guy... it's just a girls night out. Clint is working late, and I really want to go... Please?" She looks at me with her puppy dog eyes as she tries to hide her smile. She knows I can't refuse, and yelp out a celebrating "Yes!" when I agree to go.

 "Y/n, stop fussing, you look great!" Natasha swats my hand away from the hem of the dress she has lent me.

"But it's so short!" I whine and tug on the fabric again, trying to make it cover a bit more of my thighs but to no avail.

It does look great, and it hugs my curves all the right places. My ass looks great and with the high heels matching the dress, I look like a million dollars.

But this outfit will get me attention and something inside of me keeps reminding me, that I don't want anyone else's attention but Bucky's.

 Once seated at the corner of the bar, after having ordered a drink each, I relax a bit. There's a cozy atmosphere. I'm typing out a message, only listening halfheartedly to something Nat is saying, barely hitting send before the phone is snatched from my hands. "No phones!" she says sternly and put it in her purse.

"But, I was just texting Bucky, letting him know..." I start, but she cuts me off quickly by adding "And no, Bucky! This is girl's night out, remember?"  

 I smile sheepishly and nod. Clinking our glasses together, we are already deep in conversation again.

 "Y/n?!" I hear a familiar voice and immediately my eyes widen, cringing when I see the recognition in Natasha's eyes.

I turn around, and surely there he is, the one ex I don't want to meet ever again.

 "Brock, hi" the words are short and not inviting to further talk, but Brock being Brock he ignores the clear dismissal in my voice.

 "Y/n, it is you! I thought my eyes deceived me... You look fine" His words are slippery and hold more than just a compliment. That guy never did want anything else but my body.

"Still just the two of you like always, hmm?" He's eyes roam both Natasha's and my own body like they were food and he was a starving man "I thought I heard you had gotten married Tash. Settling down in the boring life as a housewife? And yet, here you both are just like the old days. Nothing's changed huh?"

 Natasha's eyes are hard and cold, she never did like Brock, and looking back I don't blame her.

She holds up her hand, flashing the beautiful ring that Clint gave her "Everything has changed, Brock. Now go away... we're having a girl's night here"

 He laughs, ignoring her completely as he moves closer to me, putting his hand on the small of my back, his eyes roaming my cleavage "Let me buy you a drink Y/n"

He signals to the bartender to make new drinks, even though I say no.

 Brock never was one to listen to others. And my discomfort is clearly showing to everybody in the room, except from him.

 When Brock puts his other hand on my thigh, Natasha is just about to jump up and yank him away from me, but someone else steps in close and lean in to kiss my cheek. Doing so, he comes in between Brock an myself, making Brock have to let go of me.

 "Hi Doll! I'm sorry I'm late. I got here as fast as I could, but traffic was a pain" Bucky's velvet voice rings sweetly in my ear, and I can't stop myself from grinning widely when I look up at him. Even Natasha looks happy to see him interrupting.

 He leans in and plants a quick kiss on my lips, making me sigh out loud before he turns to Brock and extend his hand.

"Hi, I'm Bucky, y/n's boyfriend... And you are?" The words are cold as ice, and leave no room for Brock to question what is happening.

 "I'm leaving..." He mumbles and turns around to walk away.

 I beam up at Bucky, who looks like he is watching a cockroach following Brock with his eyes. Natasha smirks looking from me, to Bucky and back to me, before she says

"I'll be right back, I have to give Clint a call" She winks at me as she stands up and makes her way towards the ladies room.

 "Thank you for saving me there..." Looking at Bucky, seeing how handsome he looks in dark jeans, tight navy-blue pullover and his hair pulled up into a bun. His blue eyes meet mine and his lips curl up in the smile I've come to love and adore.

 "Couldn't let that beast put his hands on you, Snow White" He answers and I have to giggle at his words.. "Wrong Disney Princess, Park Guy"

 His eyes wander over me. For a second I swear his eyes takes a darker shade of blue and he clench his jaw as if he is holding something back before he whispers "God, you are beautiful!"

 The waiter comes over and places the two drinks that Brock ordered before, in front of us as he says "One beer for the gentleman and one 'Blue Butterfly' for the lady" before he smiles shortly and quickly turns away to takes the next order.

 We both chuckle when we hear the name of the drink. I let my finger run over the cool glass before I turn to look at him, a shy smile on my lips

"So... My boyfriend, huh??"

 Bucky's eyes looks deeply into mine, his smile never leaving his lips as he puts his hand on my cheek

"Only if you'll have me?"

Part 6

Tags:

@bexboo616 @happylittlethingsss @mizzzpink @fangirling-all-the-way-tbh​ @owhatshername1 @sinceimetyou @alextittle @todorath @tbetz0341 @fortheloveoflamp @whimsicalatbest @buckysjuicyplums @mynameisreallycoolbutitstoolong @kalisaysfuck @shitmymomsay @mjgonzalez-01 @projectxhappiness @kuollut-talven @lol-haha-joke @caplansteverogers @loki7ms @who-cares-rn @cc8302 @buckysarm4 @altyex

[uruhabuns]

Sickie

Genre: fluff Pairing: girl!reader x jaeyoon, suggestions of reader x other sf9 members Word Count: ~3000 words a/n: i’ve been in a v v jaeyoon mood recently and i know how shitty it feels to miss out on performances you’ve practiced hard for when you’re sick, and that there’s not much writing centred around our precious honey boy :( so here’s a fluffy scenario no one asked for <3

__________

It was another chilly day spent studying at the university library. Atop the table sat your laptop, textbooks, and thermos filled with hot chocolate, ready for a day of powering through a knowingly procrastinated assignment that was due in two days.

After a few hours of typing up your essay, you decided to take a short break. You took a sip of hot chocolate as you scrolled through your Twitter feed. A single tweet then caught your eye: “Jaeyoon to not participate in SFDay due to illness”. You couldn’t help but sigh. You knew this was going to happen. Late night practices and gymming, dieting, and not to mention the freezing weather, had finally taken a toll on his health. It didn’t help that he was as stubborn as most guys were when they deny their deadly sickness in order to do something they wanted that they knew that was bad for them.

Irritated, you opened Kakaotalk to see the red notification to show that you had 300 new messages. You rolled your eyes, opening the app to message the group chat you and the boys put together (which you had on mute, because of how rowdy they could get, even in their chats). The messages kept coming, to which you assumed that they were in the middle of a conversation about something else, but you decided to interrupt for the sake of worrying.

[ _______ ] : Hey, is everyone okay? Have y’all gotten enough sleep? Eaten enough?

Not even moments later, one of them replied.

[ younggyun ] : yes mom, we have ㅎㅎㅎ

[ hyukie ] : ________!!!!! YOU’RE HERE!!!!!

[ taeyang ] : __________!!! We missed you ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

A chuckle escaped your lips at how cute they were, no matter how annoying they could be. You could never stay mad at them.

[ _______ ] : Come on I haven’t been dead for that long ㅋㅋㅋ

[ hyukie ] : Yeah you have

[ hyukie ] : FOR THE PAST THREE HOURS

[ ________ ] : I WAS WRITING MY ESSAY YOU LITTLE SHIT

[ hyukie ] : R U D E

[ hyukie ] : HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT TO YOUR BEST FRIEND

[ seongseong~ ] : Stop procrastinating, _______!!

[ _________ ] : Oppaaaa~ help me with my assignment ;_____;;;; I’m not as smart as you

[ seongseong~ ] : I would if we had the day off ㅋ

[ ________ ] : Speaking of days off how’s yoonie-oppa doing? I heard he got sick ㅠ WHY DIDN’T Y’ALL TELL ME??

[ jjuongie ] : uhh...because we didn’t want you to worry?

[ ________ ] : HOW COULD YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME, JUHO?! I WOULD FIND OUT WHETHER YOU’D TELL ME OR NOT!!

[ jaeyoon ] : I feel like I could sink into the arms of sweet, sweet death

[ ________ ] : NOOOOO!!!!

[ jaeyoon ] : uggggghghsjklfgdjlf;d

[ ________ ] : Will you be okay? ;_;;;;

[ youngbin ] : OF COURSE NOT HE’S DYING, _______

[ ________ ] : Oh my god...

[ ________ ] : Boys...😒😒😒

[ chanhee~ ] : Noona, I think Jaeyoon-hyung might need some looking-after...

[ youngbin ] : Chan, she needs to concentrate on her assignment. Don’t distract her 😑

[ ________ ] : No, he’s right; I’m gonna head over to your place rn since y’all need some home-made food in your life anyways

[ seokwoo ] : Did you forget that my cooking exists?

[ _______ ] : 😉😉 love u too~

[ taeyang ] : OMG MAKE SOME FOR ME TOO I’LL LOVE YOU FOREVER!!

[ younggyun ] : Pls noona we love your food

[ jaeyoon ] : ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND, ________?? Don’t come here, you’ll get sick too!!

[ _______ ] : 🙄🙄🙄🙄

Figuring that you had enough of the chatroom for the day, you locked your phone, and placed it in your bag. You then packed up your things, and headed out of the library to catch a bus to the boys’ apartment. Though the essay was due in two days, you figured you could do it at their place, since they weren’t around until late at night anyway. Thoughts of worry flooded your mind throughout the bus journey. You wished they didn’t work their bodies so hard. You wished they didn’t agree to multiple comebacks within months of each other. And above all, you wished they would listen to you, and look after themselves.

The bus then came to a halt at the bus stop in front of the apartment block. You tapped your travel card before stepping out, and rushing inside the building. Once you reached the door of the boys’ unit, you took out the extra key card they gave you in case you wanted to visit, and tapped it at the doorknob. You quietly opened the heavy door, careful not to wake Jaeyoon up in case he was sleeping. You entered the apartment as silently as you could, closing the door slowly. You slid your shoes off before placing your bag, thermos, and slipped off your two coats to put onto the coffee table.

You then headed into the kitchen to salvage whatever ingredients available to make chicken soup. While you were waiting for the water to boil in the pot, you felt a presence coming closer from behind you.

“_______?”

You jumped in surprise at the hoarse voice. You turned around to see a tall,  sleepy, fluffy pink-haired man pouting at you.

“Oppa, you shouldn’t be up!” you exclaimed, grabbing his wrist, and dragging him back into his bedroom. “Nope, nope, nope.”

“But, _______,” he whined with his sore, stuffy voice that was usually cute. You ignored his pleas, and pushed him back into bed. You then threw his quilt and blankets over him, despite his whining.

“Shush, I’m gonna make you soup and tea. I’ll call you out when it’s done, okay? You are not leaving this bed. That’s what you get for overworking during winter! Gosh. Why do you guys like to stress me out?”

Jaeyoon only continued to pout and sulk in response. How you got along with these man-babies, you had no idea. But you didn’t mind; they brought you happiness, and always seemed to bring a smile to your face no matter how shitty your day was, or how busy theirs were. In a way, you were thankful you had them in your life. You guessed meeting and pulling through with your noisy best friend Dawon since high school had paid off.

When you finished making the soup, you turned off the stove, and poured some into a ceramic bowl. You then placed the bowl onto the kitchen counter along with a spoon and pair of chopsticks. You then quietly made your way into Jaeyoon’s room to see that he was fast asleep again. A small smile curled on your lips at his sleeping figure. You couldn’t help but softly stroke his pink hair with the back of your fingers. He looked so peaceful.

“Oppa,” you whispered, gently shaking his shoulders. “Wake up, soup’s ready.”

After a few nudges, a sleepy grumble sounded from him as he finally woke. You giggled softly as you slowly helped him sit up.

“I’ll go and make the tea. Come out when you’re ready, but don’t take too long, ‘cause the soup is gonna get cold, okay?”

You knew coming over was cutting down precious time that could be used to write your essay, but you decided that you would only need coffee, good bullshitting skills, and at least eight references that you could pretend to have read.

Jaeyoon, however, used this as time he could spend with you alone. It was probably the only time he could.

“_______, wait,” he said, making you stop in your tracks and turn around.

“Yes?” you replied and made your way over to him again.

Once you were close enough, Jaeyoon hugged you around your waist abruptly. You gasped, holding up your hands next to your head as you stood in between his legs. A blush began to burn on your cheeks as you were caught in surprise at his actions. The proximity between the two of you caused your heart to race, and that you shouldn’t be this close to him when he’s this sick. “O-oppa-”

“Please don’t leave me,” he said, and coughed a few times as he rested the side of his head on your chest.

“I-I’m not going to leave,” you stuttered, placing your hands on his shoulders. “W-what are you talking about?”

Jaeyoon only sighed. “I...I don’t know if you know but...” he trailed off.

You furrowed your eyebrows. “But what?”

He hesitated slightly, breathing in once before saying, “I really like you.”

You froze. “You...what?”

“Don’t make me repeat myself,” Jaeyoon said, “I like you, _______.”

You bit down on your lower lip, not knowing what to do with the information. You didn’t know how to react. “Oppa...”

“Please, _______,” he begged, holding onto you tighter, “I wanted to tell you before any of them could.”

You blinked in shock. “Oppa, w-what are you talking about?”

“Haven’t you seen the way they look at you? And the way they look when we talk about you?”

“W-wh-”

“If it weren’t for you coming over today, I would’ve thought Inseong or Taeyang would confess to you first if they had the chance.”

You inhaled in attempt to calm yourself down at the amount of information that was fired at you. Your heart raced as your hands trembled on Jaeyoon’s shoulders. How could this happen? You always thought no one would take any interest in you. But this whole group proved you wrong. It didn’t seem possible.

“Jaeyoon...”

“Please accept my feelings for you, _______,” he said, gripping onto your shirt, and closing his eyes in hope that you would. “I don’t want anyone to confess before I do.”

“Jaeyoon...” you said again. You took another deep breath before finishing your answer. You then wrapped your arms around his neck, resting your hand behind his head, and gently stroking his hair. You had to prepare him for your answer, as you knew it would break his heart. “I love you, and I do accept your feelings...but...”

He looked up at you with his hopeful, puppy eyes that made you melt inside.

“I can’t be in love with you,” you said softly. You saw his face fall, making your heart clench. It hurt you as much as it hurt him to say that. “Not if the others feel the same way. I can’t let this ruin your relationship with them. I don’t want to destroy what we have. I’m so sorry.”

Jaeyoon let out a sad sigh. “What if they didn’t have feelings for you?”

“I don’t know...” you said, resting your chin on top of his head. “I want to be selfish and say yes and give us a chance, but I don’t know what consequences there would be if I do.”

“...I guess you’re right...” Jaeyoon mumbled, loosening his grip on your waist. “That’s what I love about you; you’re so considerate and thoughtful.”

You chuckled, pulling back to face him and cup the sides of his face with your hands. “Hey, I still love you, okay? I don’t want our relationship to change,” you assured, tapping his nose gently, “And besides, I now know that you like me. It’ll be our little secret. The other guys don’t have to know.”

“Yeah, I guess. At least you’ve accepted my feelings...”

You leaned down to place a soft kiss on his forehead. He blinked in surprise.

“That’s for being brave enough to tell me that you like me,” you said. You then did something you’ve never done before with any of the boys: you moved down to place another kiss on his cheek, leaving your lips there a little longer than usual. “And that’s for being understanding about my feelings about it.”

Jaeyoon felt his face burning up. “Th-thanks.”

A shy smile stretched across your lips. “We should head out. Your soup is getting cold,” you told him as he let go of you.

“Okay, mom.”

You laughed softly as you made your way out of the room to make some green tea for Jaeyoon. As you were doing so, he sat on one of the high chairs at the counter and began to sip the soup.

“It’s still warm,” he said, the pain in his throat still present.

“Shh, don’t talk,” you replied, pouring the boiling water into the mug with the tea bag inside. “Just eat.”

He only pouted. “Okay...”

You giggled softly as Jaeyoon ate, pushing the mug in front of his bowl. “I’ll be in the living room. I gotta do this assignment, but let me know when you need anything, okay?”

“Alright.”

You went over to his side to give him a side hug, and another kiss on his cheek before you skipped off to the living room. Another blush crept on the poor boy’s cheeks as he took a sip of the tea. You took your laptop out of its bag, and unpacked your notes and textbook from your backpack to continue working on the essay.

About another 500 words in, you felt the couch dip beside you.

“Why haven’t you gone to bed?” you asked, your eyes not leaving the laptop screen. “You should be resting at every chance you get.”

Jaeyoon took another sip of the tea before resting his head on your shoulder. “I wanna spend some time with you before the others come back.”

Sighing, you decided that having Jaeyoon around would not help you with concentrating on your assignment. You closed your laptop shut, placing it back on the coffee table with the rest of your things. You couldn’t resist those puppy eyes of his, and you hated it when he used it against you to get what he wanted. You only needed another 1000 words to write anyway. It could be easily done in a day.

“Okay, come here, you big baby,” you said, rolling your eyes, and spreading your arms out.

A happy smile spread across Jaeyoon’s face as he put the mug on the coffee table, and practically flew into your arms. You giggled as you pulled him down to lie on the couch with you. He wrapped his arms around your waist again, resting his head on your chest. To be fair, you were quite sleepy, since you had to wake up early that morning for a 9am lecture. A nap at the boys’ dorms wouldn’t hurt. You felt your eyes becoming more droopy before you blacked out completely.

A few hours later, you heard a click that sounded like the doorknob opening. Consciousness came back to your brain when the door opened up, and the sound of chatter followed.

“What the- JAEYOON, WHO THE HELL GAVE YOU PERMISSION TO SLEEP WITH HER?!”

The both of you jolted awake at Youngbin’s yelling. You then looked down to see your legs tangled with Jaeyoon’s as you two were snuggled up against each other.

“Oh my god, Chani, don’t look,” you heard Rowoon say in the background.

“Wait, wha-”

“HYUNG, I’M GONNA KILL YOU!!” Dawon screamed before ripping a confused Jaeyoon out of your grip. You were now fully awake to see the rest of the boys chasing after Jaeyoon.

“I WASN’T SLEEPING WITH HER, LEAVE ME ALONE!”

Shocked, you got up and ran after them just to see Dawon and Zuho beating Jaeyoon up with his giant Ryan plushies.

“Hey, leave him alone!” you exclaimed, “He���s still sick, you know?!”

Dawon stopped harassing Jaeyoon to glare at you. You kept your firm glare at him before he stormed up to you and dragged you out to the living room by your arm, leaving the rest of the boys to do his job.

“What the hell, _______? Are you crazy?!”

“If you’re asking, no, we didn’t do anything inappropriate!”

Dawon pressed his lips together and grumbled before saying, “Okay, that’s one thing. But why did you come over when you’re gonna catch his cold?!”

“You guys can’t even take care of yourselves when you’re not sick, so I had to do something, geez...” you mumbled, crossing your arms.

“Okay, fine. But if you get sick after today, you’re not allowed to look after us when we get sick ever again, got it?”

You sighed, reluctantly agreeing to his compromise. “Fine.”

“Also, I think you can go home to do your assignment. It won’t be easy with those us around.”

“Yeah, whatever. I have tomorrow off, anyways.”

Dawon offered to drive you home, which you gladly accepted. During the car ride back, he told you about what happened that day, how it was SFDay, and that they had a special food event with the fans. You thought it was cute, but your concentration was on messaging Jaeyoon.

[ ________ ] : Get well soon~ don’t let the boys torture you too much >.< if they aren’t gonna let you live it down, tell me and I’ll beat some sense into them ㅋㅋㅋ

[ jaeyoon ] : I’ll do my best ㅠㅠ btw, the soup was really good~ I’ll make sure to spit in the pot so the others won’t touch it ;)

[ _______ ] : ...gross

[ jaeyoon ] : I’m kidding! Though, I still won’t share it with them...it’s still my recovery food

[ _______ ] : ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ you better hide it well so they won’t find it!

[ jaeyoon ] : I’ll try e_e

You chuckled before locking the phone screen, looking up to see that Dawon had just pulled over to your place.

“Thanks, Hyukie,” you said as you grabbed your bag, ready to leave.

“It’s okay. If I catch you sleeping with one of the guys, or any guy for that matter, I’m not gonna let you hang out with us again.”

You rolled your eyes. “Pfft, you’re crazy. You know I’m not like that.”

“Yeah, yeah. Hurry up and get out; you need to finish your assignment, you lazy butt.”

“Whatever, loser,” you replied with a cheeky smile. You gave Dawon a quick hug before getting out of the car.

The next morning, you woke up with a pounding headache, and felt like you were in a sauna. From past experiences with colds, you knew this was bad.

Oh SHIT! You thought violently.

On the other side, the boys were busy getting their hair and makeup done for the music show’s pre-recording when their phones lit up to see a new message in the group chat.

[ ________ ] : ...

[ ________ ] : I hate you, Jaeyoon!!!!!

[beepbeep-losers]

Okay so I'm sorry about the Reddie angst, but now can you do another where its continuing off from the one? Use 16,29,31, and 43 please?

OMG don’t apologize I’m trying to write a reddie fic rn andthis is such good practice. Also sorry this took forever!!

Find the Part 1 to this here!

#16 (“Just shut up and kiss me”), #29 (“I told you thiswould happen”), #31 (“You’re alive?!”), and #43 (“Squeeze my hand if you canhear me”)

***

Eddie took a puff on his inhaler, for about the fifth timein the past half hour. He was pacing rapidly around the waiting room, his eyesconstantly darting to the doorway where he knew the nurses would come to givethem updates on Richie. All the losers were there, taking up a good portion ofthe small waiting room.

“Eddie, you’ve got to calm down,” Bev said softly. She wasclutching Ben’s arm, looking forlorn. “He’ll be okay. He’s hurt, but from whatMike said they didn’t do enough damage to kill him.”

“Yeah, well you didn’t fucking see him getting beaten todeath, okay?” Eddie snapped at her. “I’m just worried, alright? He could barelyeven talk, he was just fucking gagging –“

“H-how’s your ah-arm?” Bill asked, trying to distract him.

“I CAN’T THINK ABOUT MY ARM RIGHT NOW, BILL, RICHIE ISDYING.”

“Eddie,” Mike said sternly. He stood and grabbed Eddie bythe shoulders, making him still. “You need to take a breath. Calm down. He’llbe fine.”

“Mr. Kaspbrak?”

Everyone looked at the nurse that had slipped into the room.“Yes?” Eddie said breathily.

“I heard that you wanted to see Mr. Tozier when possible. Heisn’t awake yet, but he should be soon –“

Eddie was walking past her before she could finish, charginginto Richie’s room. His glasses, one lens cracked, were on the bedside table,and he had an IV in his arm. His eyes were closed. Eddie threw himself into thechair beside his bed, barely registering the nurse coming by and pulling thedoor almost always closed.

Eddie looked at Richie, at the bruises littering his skinand the ugly busted lip. They had reset his nose and cleaned up the blood thathad drenched his face, but Eddie still had the gruesome image planted in hismind. He glanced nervously at the door, and he could hear his mother’s voice inthe back of his head telling him that being gay was an illness and he couldhear the bullies calling him and Richie those awful names. But when he lookedback at his boyfriend, those voices were overpowered, and he reached for hishand, intertwining their fingers.

“Richie,” he said softly. “Trashmouth, I swear to god, ifyou let your last words to me be a joke about my mom I’m going to strangle yourcorpse.”

He didn’t get anything in response and his heart fell alittle.

“I love you, Richie,” he prompted further, speaking a littlemore loudly. “Can you hear me? Squeeze my hand if you can hear me.”

Nothing.

“If you die I guess I’ll have to date Mike,” Eddie sigheddramatically. “He’s a bit manlier than you anyway. It’d be an upgrade.”

Finally, Eddie felt a squeeze from Richie’s hand and the boyshifted in his bed. Richie slowly turned and his eyelids fluttered, slowlyopening and focusing on Eddie.

“You’re alive!” Eddie laughed. “Thank god, I don’t thinkMike is gay.”

Richie smiled, wincing as his lip stung. “Mike wouldn’t beable to fill my shoes anyway, Eddie Spaghetti.” His voice was croaky, but Eddiegrinned anyway until he remembered that he was mad at him.

“You are an idiot, Richie,” he said firmly, squeezingRichie’s hand. “You could’ve gotten yourself killed.”

“They were burning you, Eds, I couldn’t let them do that toyou.”

“You shouldn’t have been like that with me in public,Richie,” Eddie fretted. “I told you this would happen if we were open about us.I told you, but you always wanted to – to –“

“To stop hiding?” Richie said hoarsely. Eddie met his eyesand saw that they had tears in them, melting his heart. “I want to be able toreally be with you, Eds, I don’t want to hide you.”

“Don’t call me that,” Eddie said half-heartedly. “You know Ihate it when you – and we can’t be out, it’s too dangerous, we’ll get ourselveskilled, and our parents, Rich –“

Richie covered his mouth with his free hand, even though themovement pulled on the IV and made his entire body ache. Eddie glared. “Eddie,darling, you’re talking too much. Remember how we could’ve died? Just shut upand kiss me.”

When he removed his hand, Eddie was smiling at himreluctantly, the grin tugging at the ends of his mouth. “Fuck you, Richie,” hewhispered, leaning in to his boyfriend.

“You wish, Eds,” he grinned, and brought his lips to Eddie’s.

[sylvie-writes]

Dad Jokes

Summary: You and Steve take Peter out for some fun while Tony decides to tag along with his cheesy dad jokes.

a/n: I’m testing out queue rn with this story. Sorry for this terrible plot, it’s from this and i’m not really proud of it b/c of the extreme cringe. I haven’t fixed it at all, so here ya go. Also the author’s note at the bottom was for when it was written. I left it as an explanation for my terrible decision. 

my more sensible writing: x

It was a free weekend, meaning everyone had time to live a normal life. Peter had just joined the team so you and Cap thought to make it special for him. 

You both were in the kitchen cooking breakfast, when Peter had walked in. It was just you three. Tony was up the floor above, Bruce and Thor doing who knows what, and Nat and Wanda busy messing with Clint.

(y/n): Welcome to the team, Peter! As a welcome gift, Cap and I would like to do some fun things with you today.

Steve: It will be a lot of fun, what do ya say?

Tony: Did someone say Peter?

(y/n): how did he hear us?

Steve: no clue

Peter: I'm totally down! Thanks Mr. America-Cap-Steve- I mean sir, and you too Miss-(y/n)-ma'am. Gosh I'm sorry.

(y/n): Peter, honey, it's fine.

Tony: I'm totally down too!

Steve: umm Tony , no—

Tony: It's ok, I know you guys forgot to invite me. Totally cool though.

(y/n): *nervous chuckle* Yeah. Totally.

Steve: But—

(y/n): no buts.

With Tony unexpectedly tagging along, the four started their day.

*In the car*

Steve: How about we take a hike first? The weather is great!

(y/n): oh yeah I brought some snacks too!

Peter: sounds cool.

Tony: perfect opportunity to use my playlist! It has music from Peanuts, The Cranberries and Eminem...

Tony: I call it my trail mix.

(y/n): How about, no.

Tony: What?

Peter: That dad joke was just... *chef kiss*

Tony: ok ok. I see how it is. Don't worry I don't give up that easily

Steve: That's just swell. *rolls eyes*

The hike went pretty well. Tony complained the whole way and Peter was a complete chatterbox, and Steve. Well, he was Steve, full of endurance as usual.

*On the way back to New York City*

(y/n): you hungry, Peter?

Peter: Definitely! I know this great place in Queens.

Steve: Queens? Not... Not *lowers voice* Brooklyn?

(y/n): *lightly smacks Steve's chest* Yes. Queens is completely fine. *smiles at Peter in the rear view mirror*

*Steve parks the car*

Steve: Okay guys, we have to walk from here.

Tony: don't worry about us Capsicle. I know it's hard for the elderly to walk, you gonna be ok?

(y/n): now, now boys. C'mon Peter.

With that, you and Peter walked down the street, leaving Tony and Steve to trail behind. About halfway through, the two men finally caught up. You linked your arms in Steve's and Peter's.

Tony: I see how it is.

Tony then continued to walk in front of you, his head held high. Literally. He then strut down the street, like the goofy airhead he is.

Peter: wait. Is that—

(y/n): what?

Peter: *points in the distance* Ariana Grande!?

As Peter totally fangirled, Tony came back to walk beside us. We continued walking and Peter broke away from my arm to try and take a picture. Tony then came in and swooped into Peter's spot. He leaned towards Cap and I.

Tony: You know how celebrities keep cool?

(y/n): *looks up to Steve* Here we go again.

Steve: *smiles down at you* How?

Tony: *looks forward*  They have many fans...

(y/n): ok. I'm just not gonna- ok.

Peter: *runs towards you guys* I GOT A PIC!!!

After Peter got his best shot of Ariana, the pizza place was right around the corner.

 It was a local Italian restaurant, the smell emitting from the building was absolutely mouth watering. 

The four of you sat down at a booth, looking over the menu. Steve nudged you lightly as your mouth fell open, while looking over the many appealing options.

*while eating lunch*

Peter: Whoever made this food is the G.O.A.T.

Steve: *chokes on spaghetti* What?

(y/n): Honey, it means greatest of all time.

Steve: Ohhh

Tony: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

Peter: Oh my gosh, that's soooo sad!

Tony: He pasta way! *slaps table*

(y/n): OH MY GOD, TONY!

Tony: no need to be salty, (y/n)

(y/n): No need to talk like a millennial, you boomer.

Tony: *gasps* Did you just?

(y/n): yup.

Lunch was absolutely amazing. 

The day wasn't over yet. You and Steve still had plans for Peter. 

He was a great kid, and you guys wanted to show him a fun day after the long mission from last week. 

The movie theater was right around the corner. There was some comedy that Peter had been dying to see, so you all stopped to watch it.

*During the previews*

Tony: Have you heard about the movie Constipation?

Peter: No?

Tony: It hasn't come out yet...

(y/n): *turns to shove her face into Steve's shoulder* UGHHHH

Steve: *shakes head in disappointment*

Peter: Mr. Stark are you okay?

Once the movie finished it was around three o'clock. You and Steve had a final trick up your sleeves. 

Using one of Tony's high tech 'jets', the four of you flew to Key West in a matter of a few hours.

*At the beach*

(y/n): So I brought some more snacks and drinks. I hope you are having fun, Peter!

Peter: Definitely! Thank you guys so much.

Tony: *tanning* Ya know, I took part in the summer olympics.

Steve: really?

(y/n): yeah, what Steve said.

Peter: Tell more!

Tony: Yeah! I did sun tanning, but I only got bronze...

(y/n): You know? I really thought you were gonna say something interesting for once.

*one hour later*

Peter: What snacks do we have?

(y/n): Umm, pretzels, cheese, chips and dip.

Peter: oh! Chips and dip please!

(y/n): No problem! Here. *hands the chips and dip*

Peter: *eats a chip with lots of dip* THATS SPICY

Tony: What do peppers do when they are angry?

Steve: she slaps you?

Tony: yes, but no.

(y/n): now is not the time Tony.

Tony: They get jalapeño in your face...

Peter: *tries to laugh* *fans face*

(y/n): can someone just get the damn milk please?

Steve: here you go, kid.

Peter: *drinks* Thanks

Tony: what are you drinking, son?

Peter: *looks at the bottle* Soy milk.

Tony: Hola milk, soy Tony.

Steve: ok, I will have to admit that one was pretty good.

(y/n): But normally we get a break in between jokes. I don't think my brain can take this nonsense.

Peter: Oh! A two for one. *laughs*

(y/n): *throws her shades at Peter*

Steve: No need to throw shade, doll.

(y/n): Oh no! Not you too! *walks towards the water* I will see you boys later. And please don't mention the wave joke.

Tony: Damn it.

The End.

Happy Father's Day to all the fathers out there! Author's commentary: I'm forever sorry that you read this. Also, I didn't create any of the dad jokes, credit to their owners. -Syl

[junker-town]

The Bachelorette Episode 5 recap: What was absolute garbage last night, and where were the bright spots?

Lee’s racism is still a main storyline, and it’s still super gross.

Hey gang, welcome back to hell, aka the recent episodes of The Bachelorette. This week, we’re going to do things a little bit differently, because I’m fed up that the producers are still making one guy’s flaming racism a main storyline.

In case you missed it, we left off primed for a two-on-one date between Lee and Kenny, from which only one man can return. Oh, and as though that weren’t bad enough in and of itself, they’re dragging this out for two nights. There’s an episode tomorrow, too, which is, for a Bachelorette beat writer, like having two back-to-back exams in college and but without Cheetos from the library’s vending machines to get you through.

Last week I wrote about how this show stopped being fun. I debated not writing about it at all anymore, to be honest, because a) last week made me want to stop watching, b) I have only so much to say about how slimy it is, and c) I said it all here. I have a feeling that until Lee and his Richard Spencer haircut get sent home, I’ll just keep writing some version of that over and over, with varying degrees of disgust.

However, I’m hoping that once this Lee B.S. is done, the show will get back to being what it’s supposed to be: a dumb (as opposed to sinister), Monday night diversion. In the meantime, I’m going to write about this program by scoring it like a sports game. I’ll be awarding an arbitrary number of points to Team Garbage and Team Bright Spots, so that at the end of this we can see whether there was anything worth watching at all.

BACK IN GOOD OL’ SOUTH CAROLINA BECAUSE THAT’S WHERE WE ARE FOR SOME REASON

Ugh, Kenny and Lee are talking on the porch. Kenny’s trying to stay calm. Lee says, “I respect how f[bleeping] calm you are, because you couldn’t do that the other night.” Lee is egging Kenny on, asking if he wants to get violent, twisting his words, gas-lighting him. I hate this. Lee calls Kenny a stack of bleeding muscle.

+1,800 for Team Garbage.

But then Kenny says this about Lee when Lee eventually backs down: “See what a b**** does when a b**** is confronted?”

+1,800 for Team Bright Spot.

BRYAN IS A TOOL

Bryan and Rachel are making out in a sailboat tied to a dock. It’s reminds me of kids making out in parked cars behind the high school gym, but instead of a car it’s a boat, and instead of high school it’s a reality show, and instead of kids it’s two humans over 30.

Bryan’s smarmy, smooth voice sounds like that of a late night DJ on a soft rock station. He says to Rachel, “So if you think I’m too good to be true for you, and I think you’re too good to be true for me, then there’s a very simple solution: I just think we’re a perfect match.”

Someone call Shakespeare and tell him there’s a new all-time great wordsmith coming for his throne!!!

This is not a point for Team Bright Spot, but it’s not a point for Team Garbage either. It’s more a point for Team Goober, so let’s go ahead and add that to the mix.

+900 for Team Goober.

Bryan's priorities are in order. #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/cla5qLM32i

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 27, 2017

OH NO, OH JACK STONE, OH POOR JACK STONE

The last one-on-one date in South Carolina goes to Jack Stone, the lawyer who, for some reason, is the first person in the history of The Bachelorette to get a last name rather than just an initial.

I thought Bryan was a tool. But Jack Stone is giving him a run for his money from the get-go, when he says, from the perch of the horse-drawn carriage, “I like to joke, and if someone can’t take a joke, and joke back, it’s boring.”

Jack Stone, buddy, pal, my friend: if you have to say it, it probably isn’t true. This schmuck has definitely texted one of his friends before and been like, “Why do nice guys always finish last?”

Rachel and Jack Stone go to this bar called Shuckin’ and Shaggin’, where they eat oysters and do a dance called shagging. Which is not, as Austin Powers would lead you to believe, another word for having sex. Rachel doesn’t seem to be having much fun. Jack Stone gets pretty creepy on the boardwalk afterwards.

Jack and Rachel laying down the law on the dance floor! Well, Rachel anyway. #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/r9RJbRP0QM

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 27, 2017

“So it was really hard to focus in there,” Jack Stone says. “Did you not notice? I kept staring at you? You looked amazing. You looked so pretty in there.”

Then he tries to kiss Rachel and Rachel is like “Eh, I’m sick, you don’t want to kiss me,” and he’s like no I do, and she’s like, no you don’t, and then he kind of pecks her on the lips and I AM DYING. I couldn’t be experiencing more second-hand embarrassment if I were actually the second hand on Jack Stone’s body.

OH MY GOD THE MOST AWKWARD EVENING DATE IN THE HISTORY OF THE BACHELORETTE HAPPENS

Note: If you’ve ever been on an incredibly uncomfortable date and don’t want to relive it, skip this, because I guarantee it will bring those memories flooding back. After watching and writing this I can’t stop thinking about this one date I went on where the conversation was the romantic equivalent of pulling teeth, so I lied and said that my roommate called to tell me my dishwasher broke. And I said I had to leave to “fix my dishwasher.” I might be a jerk.

Jack Stone tells the camera he’s falling in love with Rachel, which is strange because I think they’ve had maybe one (1) conversation before today. She looks as though she’d like to fall into the void she’s wishing would open up underneath the table.

Rachel says all the right things though, about how he’s great on paper, and how she’s hoping there’s some chemistry there. I find it hard to believe she thinks there could be after she looked physically repulsed when he tried to kiss her that afternoon, but I guess she’s all in on Bachelorette-speak.

It becomes very clear very quickly that there is no chemistry to be found when Jack Stone starts getting super weird. This, I have to say, is quality television. I’m laughing pretty hard as Jack Stone says, “I love parents,” and, “is your dad funny? I feel like I get him.” Rachel’s like “you don’t know my dad?” And Jack Stone’s like:

When it's just not there. #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/M78lb36ibz

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 27, 2017

AND THEN JACK STONE SAYS HE’D LIKE TO TAKE RACHEL TO DALLAS, LOCK THE DOOR, AND JUST LAY IN BED AND HANG OUT

Which is what serial killers say before they murder you. I’m pretty sure Jack Stone is blacked out; I think that’s what’s going on. I don’t know how many drinks he had at Shuckin’ and Shaggin’, but he can barely string sentences together, and has trouble processing it when Rachel sends him home from the date for being the Mayor of Sketchyville.

I don’t know how to score this. I think we might be back to Team Goober. And I think it’s, like, +90,000.

LEE TALKS MORE TRASH, WILL EXPLAINS RACISM TO HIM, LEE DOESN’T LISTEN

Lee is trying to get Will to be on his side about the whole Kenny thing. And Will is like, “When you call someone aggressive, there is a long-standing tradition in this country of regarding black men in america as aggressive to justify a lot of other things.”

Lee goes on a rant about how he doesn’t respect it when people play the race card, and I want to put my foot through the television.

+320,984 points for Team Garbage.

ROSE CEREMONY

We know Lee won’t go home because they’ve been teasing the two-on-one date with him and Kenny forever. My question is: Are the producers making Rachel keep him around? Is she okay with this? She cant LIKE him. Ugh.

+10,000 points for Team Garbage.

+900 points for Team Bright Spot, because Iggy finally got sent home.

BRYAN’S ONE-ON-ONE DATE IN NORWAY BECAUSE SOMEONE AT ABC HAS CONNECTIONS TO THE NORTH POLE

I don’t know why, but for the past two seasons we keep going to the arctic. Nick took his ladies to Finland, and now Rachel’s taking her gents to Norway. Nothing against either of these countries: They both seem great. But whatever happened to romantic beach escapes? One of the producer’s dads must owe Santa Claus a ton of money and this is how they’re working through the debt.

Anyway, Rachel and Bryan go on the first one-on-one date in Norway, which is funny, because she hated Jack Stone and loves Bryan and they look exactly the same. Actually, they both look just like Joel Osteen, as Clinton Yates of The Undefeated pointed out. And then Jeff Weiner of the Orlando Sentinal made this:

I don't know what this is (network sitcom? cult brochure?) but creating it was a welcome distraction from what's happening on this show rn. http://pic.twitter.com/zGDpzTQicA

— Jeff Weiner (@JeffWeinerOS) June 27, 2017

Anyway, Rachel and Bryan-Jack-Joel go to this huge-ass ski jump left over from the Olympics (I think, I dont know, kind of made that up) and repel down it. Rachel is scared.

“I think I'm more afraid to let go physically rather than emotionally, but today I’m afraid to let go physically,” says Rachel, and it’s the most impressive Bachelorette platitude I’ve ever heard.

They make out in mid-air; Bryan makes these soft humming sounds while they kiss and I feel physically ill.

RACHEL IS INTO BRYAN, PHYSICALLY

Rachel and Bryan have a ton of chemistry, I’ll admit, so I think she just wants to seriously smooch (wink, wink) him. She wonders why Bryan is 37 and still single if he’s so great, and I’m like, hey, listen, let’s not assume people aren’t dateable just because they’re not already spoken for. I say this out loud to the pint of Ben & Jerry’s in my lap and the house plant near the television that I have named Steven.

Your friendly neighborhood Bachelorette, Rappelling Rachel! #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/ZXWAMOyXxr

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 27, 2017

Rachel is being honest about not being able to believe it when good things happen to her when it comes to relationships. She says she doesn’t believe men when they say nice things, and that she has trouble taking compliments, because she’s guarded and skeptical. I relate to this, and would imagine many other women probably can too, so this is a big win for Team Bright Spot.

But then Bryan’s like yeah I used to be skinny and had acne and no one liked me but then I got super hot when I was a senior in high school LOL. Who among us, Bryan with a Y?

Anyway I guess they had a nice date, Bryan’s fine, whatever, who cares. I don't know why he creeps me out so much. He just does. He tells Rachel he loves her.

Let’s give Team Bright Spot +20,000 for this date because the bar is so low.

HANDBALL DATE AND ALSO OH YEAH PETER IS GOING TO WIN THE SHOW

“He was like Jordan in the ’97 Finals.” –Rachel on Will #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/3y76Moiplb

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 27, 2017

So the guys go play handball. Alex the Russian dude calls the Norweigians vikings, and the Norweigian handball coach says, “Handball is life.”

Peter is so clearly going to win this whole thing — he and Rachel make out (she straddles him!) in a hot tub at the night portion of the date. They walk back into the main room three and a half hours later the way two college kids who had sex all night walk into the dining hall in the morning and have to face all their friends.

But Rachel gives Will the Immunity Rose because if she gave Peter the Immunity Rose everyone would be like yeah, I’ll pack my bags and leave because there’s no way I can catch up to how much Rachel likes Peter.

There is, however, this really funny moment when Josiah tells Rachel, “You are the woman for me. The woman of my dreams. I just want to grow old with you and I really, really mean that, Rachel.”

Rachel is like hey, the thing is, you don’t ask me questions about myself.

Josiah says, “Right. You’re so perceptive.”

He leaves the conversation being like, “Nailed it!” and she literally tells the camera: “Do I question it? Of course. He sounds disingenuous. He likes the idea of me than rather than really getting to know who Rachel is.”

I love how this probably happens all the time with dudes. Where a woman leaves a date being like, eh, he seems up his own ass and self-involved, and he’s on his group text with his friends being like “she loves me, bro, I killed it, we’re totally going to bone.”

#TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/6eEiPIA3RC

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 27, 2017

Team Bright Spot gets points because Rachel dunked on Josiah behind his back. +1,825

LEE AND KENNY’S AWFUL, MANIPULATIVE 2-ON-1 DATE

This is where stuff gets bad again. I’m still so appalled by how long this storyline has gone on.

I have a hard time believing Rachel doesn’t see exactly what’s happening. It’s not about her relationships with them at this point, these guys have become a side show. Yes, that’s what the two-on-one date always becomes — no one who goes on it ever makes it very far after. But this is the grossest yet.

The whole back-and-forth on the date is fairly extensive, but, in short: Kenny tells Rachel he isn’t aggressive the way Lee says he is, and then Lee lies and says that Kenny tried to pull him out of a van one time. Rachel says she believes Kenny.

This reminds me a lot of WWE. Kenny’s a wrestler. He’s the face. Lee is so one-dimensionally evil that I don’t know whether this is scripted; he’s the quintessential heel. The producers have set it up so the two of them just sit there talking trash to each other for a while, and Rachel isn’t there. I don’t know where else she could be if not told specifically to hang back, considering they just flew into the middle of nowhere on a helicopter.

Perhaps it’s real. But either way, we’re all being manipulated racism for ratinga, and it’s and ugly and I wish they hadn’t gone this shameful route. No amount of knowing or not knowing absolves this plotline of it’s terribleness.

Tomorrow won’t be any better — Kenny bleeds from the eye and weeps, and Rachel cries a lot. I am dreading this with every fiber of my being.

But hey, nothing like a bunch of active racism to promo the next episode! This has moved to extremely shameful levels

— Clinton Yates (@clintonyates) June 27, 2017

Team Garbage points: +2,890,267

TOTALS

Team Garbage: 3,223,051

Team Bright Spots: 24,525

Team Goober: 181,800

Welp, Garbage won tonight by a landslide and I can’t imagine tomorrow will be any better! Classic 2017 for ya.