#god it really hits so hard excuse my rambling

[htub]

The Jor-El A.I. looked so sad when he realized Clark doesn't understand Kryptonian.

HE DID he was trying so hard to connect to him and explain who he is and Clark just can't understand him and he presumably can't understand Clark either 😭 idk how well the AI can perceive time and emotions etc/how much of Jor-El he is, but he was created for one single purpose and spent years laying dormant waiting and now that Clark is finally here he just,, can't.

And if it's at least in some part Jor-El's consciousness rather than a full emotionless AI that looks like him (since usually it is) that's his SON and they don't even share a language. Kal-El who he loved so much that he did all he did to save him from a dying planet, and he's alive, he really survived, but he was raised by strangers (and bless them for it) on a strange planet with strange customs and now they can't even communicate. Jor-El can't tell him about Krypton, his people and his own family, and he can't ask Clark about how his life has been on earth either. Can't even ask him if he's happy. Clark has no idea where he's really from and no way to find out because the only one who might be able to tell him speaks a language no one on the whole planet can understand.

The sheer loneliness of it is ripping a hole into my heart and I'm not even there.

[bratbby333]

I got some thoughts 👀 can I request a little something? like reader finds herself in a situation where a guy is disrespectful to her and Geto steps in to defend her... she would be so relieved like 'thank you so much tall and beautiful stranger' 😍🥰 and he's probably like 'don't worry about it, it's whatever' but in the end he offers to walk her home and he fucks her against the wall things happen 😳😳

`⭐︎ ˑ ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ YOUR GUARDIAN STRANGER ! — feat. suguru geto

word count. 3.6k content warnings. characters are 21+, fem!reader x suguru, mentions of blood, allusions to violence, reader gets hit on and grabbed in the club, alcohol consumption, p in v, unprotected sex, use of pet names, dirty talk, thigh-riding, sugu fucks hard, one night stand, the pull-out method, non-curse!au author notes. thank you for ur ingenious request my sweet nonnie...i hope you enjoy xx not beta read !!

nsfw 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 mdni

A skin-tight dress. Four inch heels. Dark lip liner with a clear gloss on top. A few spritzes of Chanel No. 5, and you are out the door and heading to the club.

Everything is great; good vibes, strong drinks, pounding 808s reverberating off the walls. The liquor warms your stomach as your hips sway to the music, your over-worked body relaxing with every bump of the heavy bass. You take in the scene around you; drunk couples making out in the corner, a few underage kids getting thrown out, a group of friends arguing over god knows what– it’s all very entertaining. You laugh to yourself, your eyes scanning the room once more before your vision settles on the one thing you were trying to avoid. Shit. Your heart drops. Really? Did he not catch the hint the last two times? You sigh deeply, rolling your eyes as you prepare yourself for the inevitable. Not this again.

Because, of course, all good things must come to an end. 

You're used to being hit on. But tonight, there is one guy in particular, unrelenting in his attempts to get close to you. He's shorter than average, the two of you being the same height when you're in heels. He reeks of liquor, cigarettes, and BO. His fringe clings to his forehead as he approaches you for the third time this evening, a disgusting smirk plastered across his face. He seems to have mistaken your accidental eye contact as an invitation to test his luck once more. With tense shoulders and an apprehensive tone, you offer him polite conversation. Not that you want to, but god forbid you reject him in just the right way to make him snap. You don't want to end up being a headline. Your eyes dart elsewhere, knowing damn well that if you look at him for too long you might gag. He is truly disgusting, rambling on and on about his podcast and his most recent bouts of buying and trading crypto. 

It's a tough situation to navigate. You're out alone. Granted, you are at a club that you're comfortable in; you're familiar with the layout, you're friends with a few of the waitresses and bartenders. The DJ knows you by name. But, you're still riding solo in a loud, rambunctious environment. Even though there is a level of comfort here, it's still a club filled with drunkards at the end of the day. 

With a fake smile and a couple nods of your head, you try to ignore the part of the conversation where he referred to himself as an “alpha male” as you accept the drink he presents to you, kindly excusing yourself before disappearing into the crowd once more.

A shudder runs down your spine, your body quite literally trying to shake away that awful conversation. God, he’s the worst. On your way to the dance floor, you pour the contents of the cup into the soil of a potted plant. He doesn't think you're stupid, does he? There is no way in hell you're drinking that shit.

You're dancing alone, enjoying the house mix that's bumping through the giant speakers, the colorful spotlights that bounce around your face as you feel yourself begin to relax once more. Finally, some much needed alone time. All you want is to let loose after an arduous week of working. Can't a girl have some peace?

"C'mon...just give me a chance." You don't even have to turn around to see who it is, you can smell him. Your nose scrunches up before you turn to face him, another fake smile pulling at your cheeks as you speak to him for the fourth time tonight. 

"I'm sorry, but I'm just not looking for anythin'...I'm just tryna have fun," you say politely, before beginning to walk away. If you just keep moving through the crowd, he won't be able to find you again. But this guy is annoyingly determined and obnoxiously entitled, because after one step away from him, his hand grabs at your wrist, "We can have fun! C'mon...seriously?! I bought you a drink and this is how you treat me?"

As soon as the contact is made, your blood boils. Rage runs through your body as you spin around to chew him out for A, assuming some smelly asshole like him has a chance with you; B, for even thinking he could touch you, and C, the absolute nerve of this man to actually follow through with it. 

But when you turn, you realize you can't see him anymore. Your eye line is obstructed by a broad, muscular back. Utterly confused, you step to the side in order to fully see what the hell is going on. The sweaty hand that was once wrapped around your forearm is now gripped by a large fist. Your eyes trail up to your savior, a damningly handsome man with jet-black hair. 

"Do we have a problem?" a stern voice addresses the musty, shorter guy. 

"Yeah, this chick's been flirting with me all night...I'm tryna get what I'm owed," he spits back, attempting to pull his wrist away, "Dude, let go...stop bein' a cockblock." The mystery man's face twists at the other's bold choice in words. You're shocked that he doesn't feel intimidated at all. 

"What you're owed?" A deep chuckle emerges from the unknown’s chest as he stares down at him. "I dunno...it seems like she wants nothing to do with you," he muses, tightening his grip around the other’s arm. 

He turns to address you, and you finally get to take a good look at him. His side-profile is god-like, but looking at him straight on is a whole different realm of attractiveness. The man's fucking gorgeous. You're too busy ogling him that you miss his question all together. 

"S-sorry...what did you say?" You shake your head a bit, adrenaline pumping through your ears from this entire ordeal, the expensive scent of his cologne mixing with the pounding bass of the club; it's all making your head spin. 

He laughs and leans down to your level, his head hovering just next to your ear. "You want me to get rid of him for ya?" he repeats, his breath brushing against your neck, sending shivers down your spine. He pulls back, looking down at you with his grip still tight around the other guy's arm. The pathetic man is squirming as the two of you share quite the intimate eye contact. You nod, your mouth dropping open as he drags him out of the club immediately. 

You let out a deep sigh before making your way to the bathroom. You lather up your hands with soap and do your best to scrub away the feeling of that man's skin on yours. Leaning up against the sink, you take a few deep breaths before fixing your hair and reapplying your lipgloss. That man is vile, but you're not going to let that gross interaction ruin your night. 

You make your way to the bar, keeping your head on a swivel in hopes to see your handsome rescuer once more, wanting to thank him for handling that for you. You pout a bit as you fail to see him on your trek, sighing as you place your order with the bartender. 

You take a few sips before turning to walk back toward the dance floor, when you literally run straight into someone. "Fuck! I am so sorry, I-" but then you smell it, the same entrancing cologne as before. You look up and are met with a devious grin on the most angelic face you've ever seen. You smile, pushing your hair from your eyes, "I was looking for you." You sound relieved as the two of you stare at one another. 

"Were you now?" he asks coyly, shifting his weight as he smirks down at you. You nod shyly, "Mhm...I-I wanted to thank you for earlier," you take another sip of your cocktail, hoping it will calm your nerves a bit, "I appreciate you stepping in, that guy couldn't catcha fuckin' hint," you laugh, looking away. 

"Don't mention it. It's the least I could do," he responds. "I'm Suguru, by the way."

Turning to face him once more, you tell him your name with a kind smile. As the two of you make small talk, you notice his chest is heaving a bit, and with a quirk of your brow, you run your eyes down his body, realizing that his knuckles are bruised and slightly bloody.

"Oh...oh my god. Are you alright?" you ask, grabbing his hand. You bring his fist up to inspect it, the dim lights of the club not offering you much assistance. "Oh, yeah," he laughs, rotating his wrist so you can examine it further, "the blood's not mine," he grins. A laugh escapes you as you gaze up at him, still holding his hand in yours. 

"Damn...you really did a number on him, huh?" Suguru laughs at this.

"Absolutely, he deserved it. Dude was a prick. I'm really sorry that happened to you," he sympathizes, watching as you grab napkins and a shot of vodka from the bar to wipe off the dried blood from his knuckles. 

"It's alright, I'm used to it by now, but having someone step in and save me was definitely a first." He releases a jagged exhale as you pour the liquor over the small abrasions on his hand, "Sorry...gotta disinfect you. That dude was gross...I had to go scrub my arm off after he touched me," you giggle. He watches intently as you finish cleaning him up, his heart skipping a beat as you smile up at him triumphantly. You are quite the woman, cunning and confident. He likes that. 

"There ya go," you chirp, before tossing the reddened napkins into the garbage can located nearby. His eyes run across your face and up and down your body, taking in every part of you. Poor thing. Though you seem so unbothered by that whole situation, there is a telling look behind your eyes, and Suguru notes that you are still a little shaken up. He would be crazy to let you wander back out there alone. 

"Do you want to come hang with my friends? I promise they won't pester you like that dude did," he offers. He nods toward the booths that line the wall. "That's them over there; Shoko and Satoru." You follow his eye line, seeing a brunette woman accompanied by a blue-eyed man. They seem to be about your age, and you love meeting new people. You smile and agree, thanking him once more as the two of you make your way over to the table. 

The rest of your night is spent laughing and dancing with the three of them. You learn that they all work for the high school across town, and that Shoko can really handle her liquor; Satoru cannot. You and Suguru are in your own world, chatting about everything and nothing, taking breaks to dance together when a good song comes on. His hands rest on your waist as you move your hips against him, your bodies fitting like you are made for one another. Suguru, being the gentleman he is, never pushes any further than that, allowing you to initiate the contact. 

It's 2 AM when the four of you stumble out of the club, the tall blond leaning on his smaller friend's shoulders as she guides him toward the taxi. It's quite the amusing sight. 

You stop short of the curb, wishing Satoru and Shoko a good night, before turning to Suguru. "Thank you again…for everything," you say, your voice raspier than usual from all the shouting you did inside the loud club. 

"Of course. I'm just glad we got to spend some more time together," he says with a smile, ushering you toward the taxi. He's confused when you shake your head. 

"I live like three blocks from here, I'm just gonna walk," you state. "It was really nice meeting you, you were great company," you smirk, heading down the road, your heels clacking against the pavement with every step. 

A few unintelligible words are exchanged between Suguru and the taxi driver, followed by a car door slamming shut, before the sound of someone jogging catches up to you. 

"You're crazy if you think I'm gonna let you walk home alone," he retorts, pushing you toward the inside of the sidewalk as he walks closest to the cars that pass by. 

"You're quite the gentleman, aren't you," you tease, pushing your shoulder into his. He chuckles, "Can you blame me? I see a beautiful woman in distress, I have to jump in." You blush at his compliment.

"My knight in...," you pause as you run your eyes down his body, "...jeans and a black tee," you giggle. After sharing a few laughs, silence settles between the two of you as the cool air swirls around you. The occasional car passes by, but other than that, it's a quiet evening. 

You glance at Suguru through your peripherals, enjoying the way his layered hair bounces with every step he takes. His cologne, though more subtle now, still wafts toward your nose. He really is beautiful. You wonder if it'd be too bold to see if he wants to continue your evening. 

You walk toward the door to your apartment, turning to face him. It's now or never. 

"You comin'?" You ask with a raise of your brow. He chuckles as he climbs the stairs, joining you by your side, "Thought you'd never ask."

You have never been into one night stands, but something about Suguru is irresistible. Whether it's because he saved you from that creep or because he is super fucking sexy, you know you need him. Now. The two of you barely made it through the doorway as you’re pushing him up against the wall of your foyer, your lips immediately finding his.

He's taken aback by your boldness, taking a second to register his surroundings before quickly flipping the two of you around, his hands cupping either side of your face as his knee wedges between your legs. His muscular thigh is pressed directly onto your core, the pressure sending waves through your body.

“Couldn’t even make it to the bed, huh?” he husks into your ear, placing a wet kiss on the sensitive skin below, nipping and sucking at it. Soft moans echo through the hallway as Suguru finds your lips once more, your tongues battling one another. You thrust your hips, rubbing your warmth against his leg. “Eager, are we?” he teases, lifting his leg more. 

“Mmm…mhm,” you gasp as the contact intensifies. You’re already addicted to him, wanting nothing more than to feel him inside you. You grind your hips harder, pressing your drenched cunt firmly against his clothed thigh, certain that he can feel your pussy throbbing against him, the tightness in your stomach intensifying. Your cheeks fluster at how quickly he’s getting you to your breaking point without even having to do anything.

He breaks the kiss, watching intently as your hips gyrate against him. “Shit…are you gonna cum?” The tone of his voice is taunting, yet laced with desire. The sight of you using him to get off has him rock hard. You blush immediately, tilting your head away from him. You nod shyly, though your hips continue their pattern. “So fuckin’ hot,” his hand wraps around your throat, your head tilting to rest against the wall. “Uh uh, don’t get shy now…look at me.” Through low lids, you meet his gaze. His lower lip is between his teeth as he glances between your face and your cunt rubbing against his thigh. With a desperate whimper, you pick up the pace. “C’mon…that’s it–cum for me,” he growls, entranced by the fluid motion of your body. You come undone just a few minutes later with a whine and a few moans of his name. Your cum soaks through your panties and a guttural moan breaks through his chest as he watches you finish. “Fuckin’ drenchin’ me already, huh?” You blush profusely, your eyes screwed tight as embarrassment courses through you.

You yelp as he flips you around, your chest now pressed against the wall, your legs parallel with your shoulders. “All that cum ‘n I wasn’t even inside you yet…” He unbuckles his belt, shoving his pants and boxers down just enough to free his throbbing erection, “...can’t wait to see how much you cream on my cock.” You whimper at the filthy words that shamelessly fall from Suguru’s lips as he pulls your dress up and drags your panties down your legs. You aren’t much help, small pants leaving your chest as your body recovers from your unexpectedly intense orgasm.  His lips part as he teases his thick tip along your slit, lubing himself with your cum. “You ready, doll?” His head shallowly dips in and out of your needy cunt, already loving the way you stretch for him. You hum, nodding profusely as you look over your shoulder. “Mm. Mhm…p-please fuck me,” you beg. Your words feel foreign to you as you say them, unsure of where all this submissiveness was coming from. But Suguru’s effortlessly domineering aura makes you want to bend to his every whim, to please him in any way that you can. 

Inch by inch, he’s delving into you. The warmth of your dribbling cunt sucking him, the squelching sounds ricocheting through his head, the sinful moans that break through your throat–it drives him wild. He growls as your back arches, pushing him even deeper. Your ass flush against his lower abdomen, your eyes blowing wide at the damning stretch of his full length nestled deep inside you.

He stays still for a moment, allowing you time to accommodate as your gushy walls flutter around him. The pace starts slow, but Suguru’s patience wears thin, and after a few strokes he’s ramming into you, one hand wrapped around the front of your throat, the other pulling your hair into a makeshift ponytail as he bounces you on his cock. The scratches that should be left on the tanned flesh of his toned back are being dragged down your beige walls, your breasts rubbing against the cold plaster with every rough thrust of his hips, the sensation stimulating your budding nipples. 

Every bump of his hips pushes his head into your sweet spot, his length caressing every part of you with ease. “Takin’ me so well,” he grunts as he rams into your furthest wall. You can’t suppress the cock-drunk whines that spill from you, your eyes welling with tears while delirious pleasure claws its way through your body, your tummy tightening as you clench around him. Your shoulders tense as your perch on your tiptoes, opening yourself up to take more of him–if that is even possible–praying he finds refuge within your womb. “Shit–” he hisses, his words nearly incoherent as the sound of skin against skin echoes through the hallway, “fuckin’ milkin’ me, doll.”

He releases your throat, the same hand trailing down your spine before his arm snakes around you, his nimble fingers strumming delicious circles against your throbbing clit. You cry out, eyes screwing shut as your legs shake. “Fuck…oh fuuuck–ahh! Gonna…’m gonna…” Your voice trails off, any semblance of a coherent thought cast to the wayside as a deep chuckle rumbles through his chest. Suguru leans down, kissing behind your ear before biting at your lobe. “I know,” he muses, his fingers work even faster against you, “Squeezin’ me s’tight…”, his hips shifting to push himself even deeper, “...C’mon. Make a mess ‘f me.” You reach your breaking point once more, lips parting as squirt spills out around his cock and dribbles down your thighs. 

His release follows suit with a few raspy swears and sultry mumbles of your name. He pulls out, working his fist around his cock, his hot seed shooting onto your ass and lower back. Suguru places soft pecks along your neck and shoulders, working to regain his breath. He catches you as he untangles his body from yours, chuckling at the evident exhaustion of your body while your knees buckle, unable to support your own body weight as you lean against the wall. 

After tucking himself away and a speedy rebuckle of his belt, he scoops you up in his arms, carrying you bridal style to your bed, setting you down on your plush duvet. 

“Bathroom?” he asks. Your brows furrow before you comprehend his question, still dazed from the spell he cast on you. With a weak flick of your wrist, you gesture toward the closed door to your left. You watch with tired eyes as he returns with a damp rag, his soft touches along your weary body juxtaposing the meanness of his strokes as he mindfully cleans you up. With a quick kiss on your cheek and a soft mumble of “you were wonderful” into your ear, he smiles down at you before beginning to exit the bedroom. It’s crazy–insane, even–how much you want him around. You must be out of your mind…this near stranger—the fact that you even let him in your house is wild, let alone asking him to stay the night? But you want him to, so bad. There’s just something about him.

You sit upright, ignoring the ache in your lower back and the morality of your choices, your question flying from your lips before your brain can stop it. “Wait…can you stay?” Your words are soft as they drift through the air. He stops just short of the door, before turning and offering you a knowing smile, “I thought you’d never ask.”

author notes. certified sugu glazer…what can i say. i just cannot get enough of him ugh.

i’m still workin thru all my requests, i appreciate yalls patience w me 🤍

my reqs are closed atm, but thirsts + chats are welcome! come say hello ☺️

tag list: @admirxation @sadmonke @the-weeb-of-the-uchiha @call-memissbrightside (lmk if u want to be removed from tags🤍)

©bratbby333 on tumblr. all rights reserved. please do not distribute. 2024.

[emmie-writes-stuff]

So the new chapter is out and GOOD GOD do I have some thoughts and a lot of them don’t make a whole lot of sense but I can’t not talk about this chapter

Firstly, Kaiser looks adorable (never thought I’d say that about him outside of my head but here I am)

Secondly, holy hell my heart hurts

He didn’t deserve this, no child deserves this

The fact that he had to “go to work” and just steal

HE HAS NO SHOES his little feet have got to hurt, or they’ve completely calloused up from not wearing shoes, but even then (speaking from experience) it still hurts to walk on hot ground and rocks and other stuff on the street

Yknow, I understood him hating milk before (because milk is disgusting) but now I get it even more

What a stupid reason to get upset, imma kick this waste of space excuse for a father in the fucking face AND balls because ITS FUCKING MILK

Eat some damn fiber or somethin if you got constipation issues

Who let this absolute scum of the earth reproduce???

HES LITERALTL TWELVE YEARS OLD

All the other shit went down before he was even double digits

But dangerous situations create smart kids, and Kaiser was very smart to start saving his own money

I used to have my own stash in case I ever had to run away (long story, we’re not getting into my family issues in this post, but yeah)

At least he has shoes now, protect those feet plz, they’re what keep you upright and moving

Soooooooo are we gonna acknowledge that he treats the soccer ball the same way he’s currently treating Ness orrrrrrrr

But like, it’s nice that he has an outlet to channel his anger into that isn’t a person (at least for now smh)

It’s really interesting seeing how each of the characters came to play soccer

(Side note: but he throws the ball at a picture of a woman, could he maybe be imagining this woman as his mother?)

His mother also deserves a kick to the face if I have anything to say bout it

I have no words for this

Just, can I steal him? Please? I’ll give him a good life

Fuck the snitches, how dare they

Also, you can clearly see his ribs defined, and that hurts me

I love that he was willing to let go of everything

He was ready to start fresh with getting money, was cooperating with the police, until the soccer ball was threatened

Because that is his most valuable possession

The money doesn’t matter, but the ball is a symbol to him of something that won’t leave him or hurt him

It’s a very small sense of independence and stability in this very unstable and controlling environment

The ball is heavily implied to be the first thing he ever bought for himself, it’s what defined a key part in his life

Taking that away is like taking away his soul, his outlet, and comfort, and Kaiser just couldn’t stand for it

There’s so many more things I’m thinkin and I have way too many incoherent thoughts for tumblr, but these are the ones I was able to clear up and make sense of

This chapter hit very deep and while my past doesn’t involve much physical abuse and struggles to this level, it was hard not to empathize and relate my own experiences with abuse with the ones in this chapter

I don’t wanna get into shit, it’s not somethin I exactly wanna put out in the public, but there’s so much here that I could understand and relate to and it just made everything so much more difficult to read (in a good way I guess)

Just, GOD, why did I have to become a fan before this chapter came out???

Okay, that’s my ramble for this, bye before I start going on even more tangents

[feelo-fick]

WELCOME TO PHIO'S EXTREMELY SELF INDULGENT AU HOUR!!!

"Oh, FINALLY, another visitor! It's so quiet in here, it's unnerving..."

—

This AU was meant to be posted on halloween but eh.... Happy Thanksgiving? HAHAHHA

still dont have a name for it, but basically, back in october i was suddenly hit with the need to have a halloween au, so now we have ghost-ified prismo and vampire/witch-ified scarab :D ( although didnt finish the scarab reference spread in time because uh, school and i lost motivation unfortunately )

au synopsis and rambling below the cut!!

the premise of this au is simple : scarab is a real estate agent whos known for his manners ( never barges in, always waits to be invited! though it is a little weird how he keeps asking to be let inside even if they already agreed that he was going to come over... ) and efficiency at his job - that is, convincing people to buy high-end housing for a good price. although his social skills need some... work, his ability to persuade people isnt something to be laughed at.

unfortunately for him, persuading the higher-ups is a completely different story - which he learned the hard way after flunking something big for the company. they dont choose to fire him, no. instead, they put him through a trial, assigning him to sell their most unprofitable property : the mansion in a small town locally known for being haunted by an "evil spirit". if scarab manages to sell it (for good profit) within six months, he is excused and is able to go on with his job. if not... well, best not to think about it, yes? after all, he'll succeed with ease - all he has to do is dispel any worries about some fake "ghost" that only exists as a result of filthy rumors. maybe clean up the place. not too hard, right?

meanwhile, stuck inside said mansion is an extremely bored prismo. hes been hangin around this place for like... how many years now? forty? a hundred? meh, all the same, lately the place has been quieter than usual. i mean- of course people dont just walk into a creepy mansion every day, but there would usually be at least a few bold kids or vloggers coming in now and then for him to entertain but even then they wouldn't stay long ( for obvious reasons ). and now, just some unbound spirits or dumb animals would pass by and thats about it. a guy can only entertain himself for so long, yknow?

that is, until today. when some posh-looking business man entered the premises and started snooping around ( whats the deal with that, by the way?? ). must be prismo's lucky day!! this is the perfect chance to pull out all the stops and play the FUNNIEST prank ever! hah!

... oh. looks like things've gotten a little out of hand.

—

WOOT WOOT WOOTTTTTTTTTTT!!! im so so happy to finish this because ohhhhh my god this has taken ages for no reason other than the fact that ive been really dragging myself to make presentable art JSNDJSJXNSJX.... i realize that i have never worked in real estate ( or at all ) which means i have probably fucked something up but uhh um ill deal with the backlash later :"D im also realizing how many odd unanswered bits and bobs this au is going to have in the future, which... i am ignoring for the most part for now, but there are SOME things that i DO have figured out like ghost lore... but thats for another time, for now i leave you with this >:)

[supermarketbae]

Heyyy, I just found you and followed❤️ could I request a billy Hargrove x reader where they argue one night and so she goes and stays the night with Eddie and somehow billy finds out where she’s at and shows up in the middle of the night and is like fuck no she’s mine and then him and Eddie argue over her and whatever else you wanna add and end how you want ofc I’m just a sucker for jealous/ angry billy

Omgg!! Hello lovelyyyy! I appreciate the follow!! thanks so much for requesting!

anddddd i made a tiny ittyyy bitty tweak to this because I felt like a little bit of angst today (sorry in advance)

warnings: Jealous!Billy, billy thinks reader is cheating, yelling, slight* panic attack for Billy (idk not really but), fluff, angst, hurt comfort :)

Some Things, Will Never Change.

You were dreaming. You just had to be. In no universe would Billy just accuse you of cheating so blatantly. You thought you had gained his trust, but apparently, old habits die hard. "I can't believe you." Billy seethes pacing in the kitchen slamming the refrigerator door open. You winced, annoyed at the noise that echoed through the dim house, When you had got home from your summer job at the arcade, You decided to pay Billy a visit. You were starting to regret that decision. "Believe what." You spit out starting to get angry at the haughty tone he was using towards you. "You playing around." Billy says eyes narrowed. "Don't think I haven't seen you flirting with that FREAK Munson." Billy growls, throwing his soda can on the table. You sigh as it bursts, eyes following the trail of carmel liquid to the floor. "I wasn't flirting Billy, He came in searching for Max and her friends, he couldn't find them so he asked me." You grit.

"You know, asking like a sensible adult. Like you should be about this situation." You say eerily calm. Billy's anger lights up like a firework at the insult. "fuck off," he growls again. "Maybe if ya didn't parade yourself around I wouldn't have to worry." Your eyes widen at his vulgar sentence. "Shut up." Your mouth hangs open "William Hargrove, don't you dare act like you don't flirt with every single fucking girl in our fucking school. AND don't you fucking dare act like I don't fucking tolerate your dumbass shit." Your screaming now. Not one to back down from mistreatment from anyone, even your boyfriend. "Then for shit's sake leave if you don't like it!" Billy shouts at you seeing nothing but red. "Don't let the door hit you in your fucking ass on the way out either!" He roars as you grab your purse and slam the door hard on the way out.

Your tearing up slightly as you get in your car. Who knows how many miles above the speed limit your driving, but your route takes you to one of your closest friend's home, who also happens to be the cause of the argument... Eddie. Knocking on his trailer door you hear a drowsy "It's open" rouse from beyond the door. Eddie's honeyed eyes light up as you drag yourself in, but quickly dim noticing you're crying. "oh my god, sweetheart what's wrong?" you sniffle louder as he calls you the pet name Billy usually does. As he pulls you into his arms, you are reminded of how Billy's frame feels wrapped around yours, and you start bawling. The whole shebang. Complete waterworks in Eddie's arms while he tries to comfort you. "Billy-mfg-Billy hates m-me" You hiccup out.

Eddie smiles bitterly. "oh honey..." Eddie trails off not knowing what to say. "Can I just... stay here." You cut off his pitiful comfort attempt quickly, feeling like a burden already. Eddie fumbles on his words, scratching his head awkwardly as he nods "Shit-of course-uh-hell-I don't really have an extra bed or anything but I can uhm- sleep on the couch... yeah." You laugh softly at his ramble. "I'm not a princess Eddie," you sigh, "I can sleep on the couch it's fine, truly." you continue as you see a look of protest on his face. He shakes his head "I'm trying to be a gentleman here excuse you." Eddie grins boyishly, and you don't know why. It could be nerves. It could be the emotional buildup from tonight. But your heart leaps. swoons even. And with a sickening resolve, you realize Billy's argument had, unfortunately, made valid sense. However, shaking your head at the thought, you let Eddie drag you towards his room to pick out a movie to watch.

Eddie's company had proven beneficial to your mood. A mere hour into the movie and your mind was elsewhere, far away from the argument you had with Billy as you two joked about last school year, munching on various health deleterious snacks that were found in Eddie's fridge. "And then she had the AUDACITY to call me 'late for class' and told me that I had to retake the whole course!" Eddie yells in indignation as you clutch your sides from laughter. "You chose to come in through the window Eddie, what was she gonna do? tip her hat and say 'pip pip cheerio' while she was teaching about the American revolution?" You cackle as Eddie slumps back on the couch snickering. Your laughter cuts short as you hear the roar of an engine.

Billy's camaro.

You panic. How could you not. Here you were with the exact boy who had caused the argument. And you knew how Billy would react to such a turn of events. To put it lightly, violence would be involved. Before you can voice your fears however, Eddie's front door slams open. You try to scream as Billy in an angered blur hurls past you and starts throwing punches, tackling Eddie, who is cussing, to the floor. "STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM HER YOU SON OF A BIT-" Billy is cut of when Eddie lands a hard punch to his gut, grimacing as he wipes his bloodied nose. "Dude!" Eddie barks "You're so full of it you don't even know what SHE'S FEELING!" Eddie spins on you pointing trying to reason with him. "I don't even want her like that man. She's your girlfriend dude so how 'bout you BLOODY listen to her feelings maybe then she wouldn't come to me dipshit!" Eddie swears once more as Billy charges at him "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" he roars as he takes a winding swing. A sickening crack issues and Eddie falls to the floor holding his nose "Fucking shit Hargrove," Eddie pants from the ground.

You realize your crying when a sob lurches out of you. Hot, thick tears streaming down your face. God how you wished to be anywhere else in the world. far far far away. It's enough to take Billy out of his angered trance, as your breathing comes out in short pants. "leave him alone Billy. I'll come back with you. Hell I don't care, just stop hurting him." you say quietly turning to the door sighing. It hurt really. So much that you couldn't feel as you lurched your way to the car. As you opened the door to leave, you glance back at Billy who's staring wide eyed, almost a look of sickened fear on his face. His usual sun kissed complexion looked paled, and gaunt. "You don't deserve her Hargrove." Eddie's gravelly voice is the last thing you hear before you shut the door behind you and drive back to Billy's house.

You don't look to see If he follows you.

It's late. You knew that for sure. The sun didn't even seem to have set before you were engulfed in a night that matched your feelings. The rain was howling outside as you sat at the lamp lit table in a witchy town you wanted desperately to forget about. The only thing that was making noise in the house was the clock. The dull ticking was a comfort. A reminder to you that some things will never change.

A comfort. you remind yourself closing your eyes. Heaving in a breath you didn't know you were holding.

tick. tick. tick. tick.

It was those four seconds you would remember till the end times.

Those four seconds in which Billy came into the room, looked you in the eyes and then crumbled. Simply melted to the ground, back against the fridge. "I'm so sorry." he said simply. You show no sign of emotion as you are unchanging, and to be frank, unflattered.

As you stiffen.

he notices.

He takes into account that your usual happy, touchy, aura is gone. He realizes he's the one that caused this. He realizes that he could lose one of the only things he's loved. He realizes you could hate him. He realizes you probably do hate him. He realizes he might never feel truly loved again. He realizes that he will never love like this again. He realizes you have been one of the only people to truly care about him. He realizes he has told you his deepest secrets. He realizes how blank your usually love filled stare is. He realizes he hates himself for this. He realizes that it feels like his heart is being ripped out.

The last thing Billy realizes is that he's sobbing.

Crying harder than he's ever cried before. Crying so hard he's shaking. He can't breathe. Why would he want to anyway. Everything hurts. It hurts so so so so bad. He would rather suffocate than lose you. He's hiccuping and thinking of every single time he's done something wrong. It only worsens as he feels your hand rub on his back as you kiss his hair "Your okay my love, it's okay... you need to breathe for me darling... deep breaths." a hard shiver racks his body at your words.

"my love" you had said.

Billy doesn't believe you still love him.

"Please-I" Billy can't get the words out as his throat closes up, hoarse with pain and emotion. The pain increases as you pull him into your chest and he inhales your scent. It feels foreign and familiar all at once.

It feels foreign because he knows he might have to let you go.

"I-I- Don't deserve you- just- I'msorryI'msorry- I hate me so MUCH." Billy sobs into your chest. He flinches as he feels a tear run down his cheek. He's oh so vulnerable. Billy whimpers pathetically into your chest. He doesn't hear the sweet nothings you coo to him as you yourself let tears flow. He's broken. you both know it. There's nothing you can do about it except try to fix the boy in front of you.

And you are.

You're trying so hard to fit the puzzle pieces back together. Billy's breathing evens out as he notices he's not the one shaking anymore. It's you who is rocking him gently in your arms. His eyes flutter as your nails scratch gently at his scalp. "You deserve love Billy." his eyes roll slightly as he hears your honeyed voice. Your voice was addictive, he thought as the thoughts whirring in his brain start to slow. Billy is focusing on the steady beat of your heart. "Let me love you." Your sweet sensual drawl is back. Billy grimaces. Cringing at how much he feels for you right now. "You still love me?" His gravelly even voice startles you. It's deep, milky, and stoic. You would've never guessed he had even cried. "Always." You say pulling him closer to you.

"Forever." You ghost into the quiet room. A small whine graces Billy's parted lips at your words. You made him feel so good. "I love you." comes the deep reply. Billy is looking up at you. Icy darkened eyes concealed by his hooded eyelids. Your mind reels, you think you've forgotten how to breathe. You'd never get used to hearing that from him. It made your heart swell every time he would say it. every. single. time.

"I love you too." you say it full of meaning. It's like a promise. A promise to hold him for as long as he needs. A promise to be there when no one else is. A promise to simply love him. You don't think you could want to promise something more than this.

A calm, needed silence enters the room, as Billy tilts up his head to kiss you. You sigh into the kiss, wanting to get drunk on the feeling of his body against yours. The last thing you allow yourself to think about before you give in to the godly pleasure of Billy, Is the clock.

tick.tick.tick.tick.

Some things, will never change.

And you hoped to God, your love was one of them.

-----

a/n: IM SOSOSOOSOOSOSO sorry it took this long. first i had a performance to end my acting classes out and after that i had to take a mental health break. I really hope you enjoy!! thank you so much for requesting and reading my love <3

[avatarofthetired]

Monthly mechs wrap up (wanted an excuse to ramble about mechs)

Lots of ramblings under the cut!!

Okay so mechs wrap up as in favorites and such

I may be biased due to what I’m currently listening to, but whatever

Favorite Album

So my current favorite album has got to be OUATIS because it has an overall great vibe with the music itself, it has Nastya present in the story, what more could you ask for? And also it has that SoundCloud live version with alternate roles and that absolutely fucks

But that’s my all time favorite, that’s always my favorite and probably (?) always will be, so I’m also going to give honorable mention to HNOC, its most certainly a love hate relationship depending on the day, but at the moment I’m loving it. It features some of my absolute favorite voices (Raph and Ashes), features a lot of Ivy on trumpet, has a fun little vibe, a solid story, and a tube sun! A lot of the songs from that album right now are favorites, so we take it

Favorite Mechanism

Okay so this one is always really hard, so I’m just going to do my top three in no particular order except that’s really hard as well but okay

So we have Ivy, she’s such an interesting character, her fiction makes me quite sad but also very intrigued you know? She also just has such style, in in love with the academic type style it’s lovely, and on the topic of academics she’s a bookworm and archivist!! (And Morgan himself I believe is a reader which is awesome). Her lines in the shows are always my favorite spoken bits too, especially Saturday DTTM “and now, unless you want us to sing…” *crowd screams yes* “see we like these ones”

Then Nastya, she’s definitely a character of all time. I agree with Kofi when they said that Nastya is probably the most developed character, I love it. Cyberian Demons is such an incredible song set on its own as well, and her backstory puts me in such pain. The “they were never meant to start a fight” goes so hard with the way she said it idk I mean this probably relates to her actor better but still. She’s like a tired older sister/carer role person in Lashings and it’s an absolute mood. She’s also very pretty

Ough who do I put here, do I put TS for its absolute wonderful madness, do I put Raphaella for her voice and her outfit and her WINGS, do I put Tim for his raw anger and energy (and goofy vibes), do I put Ashes for being both badass and terrifying, do I put Marius for his silly, larger than life personality and hidden sorrow, do I put Brian for his drum, banjo, everyotherinstrumentheplays skills and compelling backstory, do I put Jonny for… Jonny reasons, WHO DO I PUT?

Okay fuck it we’re only doing top two

Favorite Liveshow

Gotta be either Gender Rebels, Lashings, Revenge of Port Mahon, that one SoundCloud one I forget the name, or Saturday DTTM shit that’s a lot more than one uh

At the moment I’d say it’s Gender Rebels for the pure chaos that comes with Tim being the narrator (nastya punching Tim away from the mic is dear in my heart as well)

I think I just like the shows where the crew has to make do without Jonny because a few days ago my favorite was certainly lashings, probably because of the absolutely wonderful song lineup (rocket girl <333), the presence of Carmilla, the fact that Jessica was making up most of TS on the spot or the night before (TS used to have a wind up key!), and Nastya and Ivy focus of course

But yeah all of them are peak I have watched and listened many times

Favorite Song(s)

From each album of course there’s no choosing an overall favorite fuck that

OUAT(IS) - I absolutely love the whole album, I was going to say I love the second half but I think I just don’t like once/old king Cole as much as the others, but yeah the “second half” is peak, I think my favorite is either The Aurora Strikes (yes, the spoken track, it was the first one I memorized okay) Sleeping Beauty, or No Happy Ending, the vibes are immaculate and both of them just hit so hard, make me feel like fighting God

UDAD - This is a tie between Ties that Bind and Underworld Blues, because Ties is a Raph song and it’s just a lot of fun I really adore the rhythm of the chorus, and because Underworld Blues is such a SONG like HOLY SHIT they all get some singing time and it rocksssssss. Wait actually I forgot about Torn Suits them all singing over each other is absolutely fire never mind paragraph cancelled I love Torn Suits that’s it

HNOC - this may be the hardest one actually, picking my favorite out of Empty Trail, Hellfire, Blood and Whiskey, Skin and Bone, and Holder of the GRAIL feels impossible, I’m going to say Holder of the GRAIL is my favorite at the moment though because the captain is literally just a little guy it’s adorable and so sad :(((

TBI - fuuuuck uh okay we’re splitting this up into two, first half I gotta say Losing Track, hearing them all sing together and Odin go “mah train :3” as they’re all being so serious will never not slap, but also Loki and Sigyn and Red Signal and Expert Testimony exist but we’re saying Losing Track, and second half is definitely Ragnarok II The Calling because of “COSMIC MADNESS REIGNS” as well as the Tim/Raph overlapping singing it’s incredible

Oh I forgot about the Tales

TTBT I - Tim 👏 Goes 👏 Crazy 👏 no explanation, no questioning, that’s the answer

TTBT II - I can’t not say lost in the cosmos, it’s an incredible song so pretty and melancholy, Alice is also awesome it’s kinda haunting and creepy and off and beautiful

Favorite Quote

“Everybody, the music is broken. There is no more music” I quote this much more than I should, yesterday I was playing Minecraft and it glitched and without thinking I said this. Perplexed Nastya my beloved

Honorable mention to “GENDER IDENTITIES!” because yes tim, there were in fact gender identities present, well done

Reblog with your own (/nf) I want to see general mechs opinions pleaseeeee

[neonmetro]

Hey so just as I sent that other ask, I somewhat remembered what I wanted to include in the other one😓

The Achaeans. . .they are so beautiful, my favorite butches. When I'm in the butch lesbian contest and the Achaeans pull up/j

I want to know more about them, but specifically the man of the hour, the pretty princess and diva Achilles !!!!

I also want to know if throughout any of the stories any Corp head(s) specifically will play at least a somewhat significant role. Gosh I hate them all so much /POS /J /SILLY

I also need an excuse to get more Azazel content because. . .they are amazing !!!

(This part may or may not be straight nonsense)

I don't think I ever talked about it, but I really do love Azazel and Molochs relationship so much. There's so much I could say about their relationship. Especially towards the end when Azazel gets ready to kill Moloch. You can really feel the raw emotion. But also some contradictory? It might be me reading it all types of wrong but when I read it, it didn't really feel like Azazel was really sure if them, themselves was ready to go through with what they wanted to do and I honestly love that so much. The whole interaction made my heart heavy and I love it, when Azazel really lays in on thick to Moloch, the words used, the painful reality of it all, the shift of blame honestly I could go on and on about their relationship, but I'll stop to spare my fingers and to spare you from an essay or over analyzing. I really want to see more of those two, they are so cute and silly !!!

Also if I was collecting it right, Abaddon and Arakiel worked together or at least tolerated each other for a short amount of time. I want to know more about how they work together.

I also have to pay my respects to my absolute monarchs, Reficul and Chemosh. . .I love them so much god. . .also I snuck Peneume into my last ask but since this is more Project Martyr targeted than I expected, uh I love Peneume and they serve so hard man. . .always the cunty characters that die first smh. I know they don't have a whole lot about them, but they really are just amazing. Their design makes me just go "awww shucks your so pretty *twirls hair*" Peneume fanclub over here/SILLY

Thank you as always for putting up with my rambling soldier, I salute you🫡

-Ulysses loving anon

HELPPP hello again ulyanon. welcome back

THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BUTCHES THE ACHAEANS!!! SHOUTOUT TO THEIR LESBIAN SWAG!!!!! ofc... i can tell you about achilles :) our beautiful princess <3

achilles' soul is in his heel, but usually no one even tries Thinking about hitting him there, but its also the most protected part of his body (paris only manages to kill him by gaining a direct contract of his own with apollo and partially overkilling (that guy is not built for war))

his magical girl clothing is Different from what it'd normally be.

instead of just normal flesh fabric, the flesh separates into nanomachines first before forming fabric. it definitely doesn't feel like fabric, but resembles it. like those 3d printed shit yk?

and he needs constant maintanence bc his ass is so zoomy that he constantly trips and falls and they need repairs, at first it was just his parents but peleus saw that achilles latched onto this Lonely Ass Kid he has in his glorified orphanage he was like yes. i will teach you how to repair my son if he is ever hurt. and patroclus is just like 7 years old

another achilles fact, his nanomachines are able to become as fast as sound (i like song of achilles' reoccuring theme of patroclus' lyre so. adding that in.) and during his encounter with hector, he uses the river that he filled w bodies to disable him even tho hector can be as fast as the speed of light since sound travels faster in the ocean

achilles is kind of stupid bitch. i'm not going to lie. patroclus admires his effortless beauty and finds his stubbornness endearing but also it is ultimately achilles' downfall. he's incredibly immature (refuses to do anything he doesn't want to do, insults everyone, etc) when he isn't entirely anti-social but also he is literally only 15 and even when he's 25 by the time the human urge to kill everything starts, he's still a child soldier to prevent his best friend and partner from risking his own life

i am changing how achilles got into the war to begin with, but if it were following more like the original, ulydio probably would've blackmailed him by saying he was a coward rather than the fact that he was wearing a dress (because frankly they are all serving too much cunt to be saying shit from ancient greece)

in novaturi, agamemnon directly threatens patroclus' life to make achilles spiral into blanket mode and refuse to fight and him letting patroclus fight in his place is just him being so wrapped up in his anger rather than the whole briseis situation (which. you know was the whole point why he started fighting... but he got so wrapped up in his own anger and the audacity of agamemnon to realize that).

briseis is just a hostage and achilles was trying to reason with agamemnon after his own hostage and spoils of war were stolen

patroclus was also the only one contracted to fight, but achilles took his place instead, and patroclus ended up being a repair guy for the achaeans' weapons and achilles

i'll also emphasize how thesis is NOT against patroachilles like in a certain book (i do take a lot of elements of their relationship/inspo from that book but i generally do not like how miller portrays women). she loves her son very much and just has her son's best interest in mind, and if even if he decides to pick some soggy wet loser that's his choice not her's

the corpheads will!! currently trying to make sure all the corpheads will have at least some spotlight but it's a tad difficult considering there are 12 of them and 4 stories so some Will seep out in the cracks and i haven't really started revamping PO's story

aishire and ulysses are the main focus of THUTKE, but aishire is a major background factor of machina mortem

veraswamy plays a somewhat prolific role in aishire's side of THUTKE

dante is featured in the last chapter of apocalypse equos and the last arc of pink overkill

vergil is a background ish character in PO

beatrice MAY have a role in AE

i'm considering giving lancelot a side story in THUTKE? but may have a minor role in PO unsure

estouls has a minor role in apocalypse equos (they haven't been incorporated yet, but i've been thinking of doing so for a bit. maybe on the recruiters' side bc telemachus is currently on the verge of being sacked)

ilya has a minor role in MM, might also have one in AE and PO

junius may have a role in MM as set design. unsure

beowulf might have a role in AE

as mentioned earlier, uly is the main main focus of THUTKE but might have a minor role in 2 other stories as a background character (AE for telemachus, PO intervening and collecting a horsemen. who knows)

YESSS....!!! YOU GET IT !!!!! azazel is absolutely conflicted about killing everything about their life and they have to reassure themselves that this IS the correct choice to get what they want. they've essentially deluded themselves into thinking that they have to destroy everything about themselves before rebuilding themselves, but ultimately azazel does not have the stomach to kill people they used to like.

abaddon and arakiel are parallels to azazel and moloch, though if it were a little bit more fucked. they work together but only tolerating one another while pursuing their own goals. abaddon originally found arakiel already on the verge of death on a vagabond site, and basically gave them an ultimatum to help them do their dirty work and they won't kill them (a slight twist on azazel and moloch's introduction, except azazel never made it clear to moloch that they had bad intentions)

abaddon's already a husk of who they used to be, and they don't even want to live, they just want to survive the killing game in order to later kill aishire. everyone that they kill is just practice on how they could manipulate their way into killing aishire. arakiel is blind to abaddon's own manipulation of them, fully convinced that abaddon is literally not a threat because of how, to put it bluntly, dead abaddon is. arakiel is much more sure of their identity and believes their world view is absolute, but is ultimately betrayed by abaddon, unable to complete any of their goals. abaddon has little to no regard of who they discard or kill. abaddon and arakiel are kind of like bad ends to azazel and moloch, unafraid to cross the line and desecrate memories.

i think its fun to throw in parallels for characters :) they run into each other a lot once moloch is awake

i love them so much too bro.... their designs are my favs they're just so pretty

it makes a bit more sense in story but the first five members of project martyr (+ michael) were woken up first during the killing game and were quarantined together to get the ball rolling and prevent the show from being two short so they had . a lot more extra time to be traumatized together

reficul has a weird ass relationship with the dead wife and is kind of considering divorce but also is afraid to lose genesis a second time. chemosh is just kind of haunted by everything and wishes to isolate themselves and create a safe space for themselves.

(like one joke audio clip and one batman video has spiraled into me making reficul and genesis kind of crazy radioactive yxxi)

peneume the lawyer you are..........

[iamawolfstarsimp]

please pleASE can I request a fic between James and the others where James somehow provoked them all and ends up getting wrecked? Please I’m starving for marauders content I’ve literally read every fic to ever exist😭

Feel free to change the plot idea because it’s only a rough choice I will literally take anything at this stage 💀

oml I'm in the same boat with you, i have literally searched the whole internet (feels like I have) looking for fics

But I got you, have a mini fic for your troubles

"I swear to god, if you throw one more fucking paper ball at me, I'm gonna throw you off the astronomy tower." Sirius growled, hunched over his homework.

Finals season before Christmas was really taking a toll on all of the marauders.

Except for James, of course.

James was the kind of person who was annoyingly positive when everyone else was negative, mostly because he knew it got on people's nerves.

For whatever reason he was especially good at annoying Sirius (probably because he knew him so well, I mean, they were practically brothers).

Sirius whipped his head around when James threw yet another crumpled up piece of parchment at him. James sniggered and roll over onto his back, laughing up to the ceiling of his bunk.

"James, will you stop irritating Padfoot so he'll shut the fuck up so I can finish this essay?" Remus glared at the pair of them.

"It's not my fault that he won't leave me alone!" Sirius said, glaring right back at Remus.

"Will you two just be quiet?!" Peter shouted.

"Well, excuse me!" Sirius yelled right back. "All of a sudden it's my fault that James is the one being annoying!"

"I don't know what you three are talking about," James grinned from his bed. "I have been nothing but peaceful this entire work session."

The other three marauders shared a irritated look between each other.

The all opted to ignore James and he would get bored eventually and leave.

Unfortunately, Sirius wasn't very good at that and instantly turned around when James threw yet another paper ball.

"If you chuck one more paper ball at me, you're gonna regret it." Sirius hissed.

"Yeah, alright Pads." James chuckled and nodded.

When Sirius turned back around there was a good thirty seconds of silence before there was the soft sound of paper hitting the back of someone's head.

Remus, who was the victim of James' torment instead of Sirius, immediately stood up and walked over to James's bed. He grabbed him by the ankles and promptly tugged him off onto the floor.

James yelped as Remus wrestled him to the floor, pinning him down by sitting on him while grappling with James' arms. James was all the while laughing, finally getting the attention he wanted.

"I don't understand," James said calmly as Sirius and Peter hopped up to help, Sirius pulling up James' arms above his head and sitting on them, Peter holding down his legs. "I didn't throw anything at Sirius." He grinned.

"You're a fucking idiot, you know that?" Remus scowled. James grinned again and nodded.

"It's why you all love me." There was a collective eye-roll between the other three. "I mean what's not to love? I'm good looking, strong, smart, fu-hahaha-!"

While James had been rambling Sirius had taken the opportunity to start poking at his ribs.

"D-dude, stohop!" James giggled, unashamed.

"This is what you get for distracting us for an entire hour." Sirius smirked.

Peter sat lower on James' shins, making quick work of pinning his feet and had started scratching up and down his soles, Remus wiggling fingers across his taut stomach.

"You guhuhys su-hahaha-suck!" James squirmed wildly from side to side, throwing his head back when it got bad.

Jame arched his back and squealed when Remus found a good spot on his hips and proceeded to dig his thumbs into said spot.

"No no no no, nohohOHO!! H-hehehelp!!" James laughed, tugging at his arms but to no avail.

James bucked hard when Peter started scribbling on the tops of his feet and that soft spot under his toes, almost sending Remus off of him.

Remus glared and vibrated one hand into his belly the other digging into his hip. Sirius was non-stop scribbling and digging into his ribs and underarms, sending James into hysterics.

The room was filled with James' bright, loud laughter. His laugh became high pitched whenever he got really giggly, and it became especially loud when he got excited or happy.

"No more, no mohohore!!" James had closed his eyes, excepting his fate. "Plehehease!!"

They all slowed down, gradually bringing himself down from that high of laughter. Sirius wiped away the tears that had rolled down his cheek, Remus gave his belly a firm pat before climbing off, Peter doing the same.

They left him on the floor to calm down while they got back to their work. Once he noticed Remus had finished (who was the first to get done) and sat down on his own bed, he flopped across his legs.

"I have no pity for you," he smirked. "You got what you deserved." James groaned at his response.

"You're gonna continue to annoy people while they're working, aren't you?" Remus said after a pause.

"You bet." James grinned when Remus shook his head and eye rolled.

Hope you liked!!

[year2000electronics]

God sorry for the oncoming ramble but just thinking about Superna-troll Floyd has made me crazy. I love Changelings, you have no idea, mostly because of my irish grandmother. But like anyway, Floyd's story is so TRAGIC in so many senses. Like first of all, Changeling's typically replace children taken by fae, so the original couple already lost their real kid to the fae, and then they even lost the Changeling replacement to Brozone's parents, so they're just left with no one at all. At least if they had been able to keep Floyd, there would have at least been a CHANCE that they could have been a happy family, even if raising Floyd would have been difficult (I'm a big believer in the power of a loving family overcoming a changeling's flaws, because lets be honest, that's where the whole concept of changelings probably originates in--families looking for an excuse for their children acting out when it really probably stems from mistreatment and/or a lack of patience from the parents). But like it's also sometimes believed that changelings are placed in a family so they can have a better life than they would have otherwise, so the idea that Floyd was placed with one troll family that might have actually given him at least a decent life, but then he was stolen and ultimately abandoned and left in the worst possible scenario he could have ended up in just because of Brozone's parent's selfishness and greed??? Geeeeez. Poor guy :( I'd love to see someone, maybe Branch, confront him about his mischievous/problematic behavior only to have Floyd absolutely snap at a certain point because literally nothing he has ever done or will ever do will ever be good enough for someone to actually love him, will it? So why should he even try? Okay, I'm done, sorry.

YEAH ITS CRAZY especially because all the brothers struggle with that identity of like. their parents going “okay this one will be the Perfect Child”. floyd’s is also something he struggles with because like. his parents literally STOLE A BABY just trying to get a Normal Kid. and yeah he feels like they were assholes and he wonders who he might’ve been given to but also it tears him in two that his parents were desperate enough to steal a whole ass baby but somehow he still wasn’t good enough for them. they gave up on him the quickest out of the 4 too so it really hit him hard

[ladyluscinia]

BLACKHANDS GIRLIES WE ARE REALLY IN IT NOW!!!

(aka Lady's OFMD 2x01 - 2x03 BlackHands rambling)

Link to the general non-BlackHands thoughts.

Screaming. Whooping. Cheering. *Singsong voice* My fucked up pirate husbands had mutual love confessions while the main fucked up pirate husbands are "on a break" after admitting they made each other happy! AAAAHHHHHH!!! Can't murder-suicide the other half of yourself! I am winning!!!

ADJSKLDFSKJFKDL

Ok. Deep breaths. This will be rambling but coherently (<- lying)

---

Breakup Boat - Izzy's Version

Fuck, I said in my general thoughts post that the extremities of Edward's cruelty & Edward's suicidal pursuit were working well, and nowhere is that more noticeable than in what Edward and Izzy have going on.

So in the timeskip between S1 and S2 we find out Edward has been raiding ships at a breakneck pace, uncaringly trauma bonding his crew (R.I.P. Ivan), going hard on murder & booze & drugs, and tormenting Izzy to the point my guy is literally having a breakdown in front of the crew. He lost the 1st toe for threatening to resign and accidentally setting off a Stede-hurt timebomb, and Edward goes to take a 4th because Izzy doesn't convince his whole crew to happily dump their pay in the ocean. "Threaten me again" has become "Give me any excuse" it seems, and Izzy has been complying. 😬 Edward (casually): "Take your boot off." 😬 Earlier Edward offers him rhino horn, too, and Izzy just says "No, not right now" leading Edward to call him a "lightweight", so I'm thinking Edward hasn't had exclusive rights to substance abuse as a means of coping, either. (Note: the rhino horn itself does nothing, so the substance abuse is booze and any actual drugs he's gotten his hands on.)

Oh, and they didn't include the shot where Edward throws a knife at Izzy? Did it just get cut, or are we getting flashbacks with more conversation later?

Going to rewatch the end of 1x10, Izzy's "smile" at declaring Blackbeard was back lasts a fraction of a second and looks just like his "everything is totally fine I swear" grimace-smiles from the beginning of the episode, so I think it's pretty safe to say Izzy did not ask for this and hasn't thought everything was fine for a single second since.

The Breakup Boat atmosphere is definitely fucked.

Now, personally, I'm still of the opinion we're not supposed to read this as a version of a domestic abuse arc (even with the intervention talk). (EDIT: clarifying thoughts and phrasing.) Because they still inject too much of it with humor and I can't imagine Edward comfortably coming out the other side at a happy ending if we frame it that way. Like there's black comedy and then there's "Wait, we're really just laughing this off?" I think horrific domestic abuse of your ex-situationship in a romance counts as the latter. But I do think it's revealed to be functioning as something adjacent - namely Edward's depression and suicidal tendencies have massively spiked post-Stede and he's actively seeking to a) confirm his own belief that he's unlovable, and b) get killed so everything stops hurting.

And Izzy? Izzy loves him and wants him alive. Worst thing Edward could hear right now.

Like oh my GOD IZZY LOVES HIM. As soon as Izzy hits his breaking point and realizes the crew have his back, he's emboldened to go stand up for them and himself to Edward. (He has been defending them already - the pre-intervention conversation open with him quietly alluding that they need a break - but this is more.) He ignores the boot order, ignores the threat, and finally asks the damn question:

"Who am I to you?"

This is where my linear coherency falls apart btw 🥴

---

Who KNOWS You?

"We've worked together for years. You know me better than anyone has ever known me, and I daresay the same is true for me about you. I have... love for you, Edward."

Oh fuck backstory implications oh FUCK.

Ok, I've already seen the posts doubling down on Izzy realizing he doesn't know Edward at all and I'm drawing my line in the sand. That's bullshit. That line there? That's straight truth.

To quote my own posts:

People will act like you are making bold and unsubstantiated claims if you say Izzy likes Edward as a person not just as Blackbeard, but I find the notion that “Blackbeard” as a human guy you live down the hall from is somehow substantially different / distant enough from the real Edward 24/7 that only liking Blackbeard is plausible to be a very bold claim.

(That conclusion comes from this post, but Izzy knowing Edward vs Stede knowing Edward was also a major point in my original overarching Edward Meta from Season 1.)

Of course Izzy knows Edward. He knows his talents and his weaknesses. He knows the shifts in his mood, his favorite foods to find in a hold, what tasks he used to pass off as often as possible. He talks about work with him because they live on a ship. Their state of dysfunction when we meet them doesn't negate that knowing.

Knowing each other so well actually made their dysfunction worse. Let them escalate more than two people less intimate could have managed, while also exacerbating their misjudgements into ruinous disasters. Izzy didn't know - probably in part didn't want to know - Edward was falling hard for Stede so fast. Edward didn't know or want to know that Izzy was reaching a breaking point for their relationship.

But still, crucially, Izzy did know Edward well enough to clock that something was fundamentally wrong in 1x10, and he knows what's wrong now. He knows Edward is hurting him and hurting the crew because Edward himself is hurting, and the whole point of this "I'm worried about you" talk is to try and fix it.

Unfortunately, Izzy has Stede so unspoken at the front of his mind that he accidentally quotes the man, and that sets Edward off on his interrogation / further terrorizing the crew Izzy is trying to stand up for. Which is why Izzy finally makes his choice to stop talking around the issue...

"The atmosphere on this ship is fucked. Everyone knows why." -> "Your feelings for Stede fucking Bonnet."

...and then Edward shoots his leg out. Not even looking at him.

Jump ahead. Edward says to Frenchie, "The new First Mate always kills the old First Mate. It's always been like that." - Has it though? Because that has some wild implications for Izzy murdering someone to secure his spot in Edward's circle of trust (...hot). And some interesting gaps for Edward if he was ever a first mate under Hornigold or anyone else. Or is this just him fucking with Frenchie because he knows "Trust is king. And queen. Trust is everything" is bullshit? Go, repression boy, go. Who am I talking about? Both. Both is good.

And then of course we get:

"Did you think I wouldn't know the smell of my rotting former First Mate?"

Knows him by the smell of blood and infection. By the avoidant look in his crew's eye. By the fact he doesn't know Izzy is dead. Their relationship is rot and ruin by his own hand but he would NEVER assume Izzy's dead until he knows.

"He was your friend," Jim spits in Edward's face.

Edward wakes up Izzy and even delirious, literal seconds after realizing he's down a leg, Izzy knows what Edward wants the moment he flips the gun. And he wants nothing to do with it.

He knows he can't. Won't. No matter how much Edward openly wants him to pull the trigger. (Edward knows him well enough to doubt, too. It's real convenient that his final staging has Izzy looking at the back of his head. No chance of his face giving anything away.)

Izzy's absolutely brutal in his assessment, trying to give some hurt back, but he's not wrong:

"Ohhhh. Oh, are you scared, Eddie? Too scared to do it yourself, eh? Go on, clean up your own fucking mess. I'm not doing it, I've been doing it all my fucking life. Fuck off."

All his fucking life.

I have to wonder... is this a conversation they've had before? Echoes of one? Izzy has a tactic here - dismissal. Refuse to play along with Edward's melodrama. Treat "I dreamt that you killed me" as though he's throwing a snit like a toddler. "Good for you" could have sounded like a question egging him on, but it comes out flat. A sarcastic sneer. Edward has always thought he'd go out with more of a bang. Loves a good fuckery. In his Purgatory he desperately wants Hornigold to recognize how unique and over the top his mutiny was. Not like those ordinary mutinies. Even his imagined death is being pitched over the highest bluff tied to a rock???

Izzy knows Edward is serious or he wouldn't be so fraught and sobbing as he laughs, but his words don't treat him as serious. Maybe a bit of derision has been effective at ruining the fantasy before? Suicide of a great leader is just so banal, you know? Quit daydreaming and pull off an impossible fix.

(Maybe "Fuck off" normally doesn't end the conversation, but starts the real one?)

Also "Eddie". First off of Izzy's lips at his cruelest, then Hornigold's. We heard it in S1 right before Edward committed to becoming the Kraken. At the time I thought he was bristling at the disrespect - "Eddie" is not "just Edward" - but maybe Frenchie stepped on a bigger landmine than we thought. Edward is so particular about names, and Izzy knows all the rules best, doesn't he?

Either way... This time the conversation ends with Edward leaving. "Farewell, old chum," he says without turning around. And when he hears the gunshot, he's not surprised.

Edward knows Izzy, too. Knows that the farewell may count as "closure" but Izzy is only going to take the ending one way. Izzy lifting the gun to his temple was the inevitable result of leaving that room. It takes seconds. Edward is still rising out of the stairwell when it happens.

We can't talk about knowing without touching on Purgatory, where Edward goes to know himself.

Lots of interesting stuff about Edward modeling his toxic spiral off of Hornigold as the fucked up example from his past. Probably where he picked up a lot of his piracy philosophy too. But the really juicy bit related to Izzy is the spectre of Hornigold confronting him about killing his dad and Edward's instinctive:

"I've never told anyone about that."

Hornigold calls him out for telling Stede, but it seems pretty likely that Stede is the only one he's ever had the conversation with.

However.

I still think Izzy knows. Hornigold even tells us how:

"A grown man covered in tattoos? Eh? With daddy issues?"

Edward didn't tell Izzy, and Izzy didn't ask for confirmation. But Edward will tell a whole crew of strangers about "the Kraken" killing his dad to win best ghost story. And that his dad was a dick. Izzy, who Edward loves and trusts and "outsources the big job" to, would not have much trouble connecting the dots between any version of that story / troubled childhood anecdotes / Edward's issues with killing / Edward's daddy issues.

I sincerely doubt "killed your abusive old man" is even an uncommon pirate backstory.

Izzy does know Edward - at his best and worst and everything in between. Knows him better than anyone. Suspects with certainty his darkest secret.

Izzy knows Edward, and Edward knows Izzy, and that's why everything fundamentally quakes for Edward in this self-destructive rampage when Izzy breaks their unspoken rule and tells him that he loves him.

---

Who LOVES You?

Jumping back to the (first!) literal, actual love confession we got, let's talk phrasing. Because yeah there's love there, but at the moment there's also a lot of other stuff.

"I have... love for you, Edward."

This is such a passive way of confessing, and there's the long pause as Izzy forces it out. People have attributed it to repression, or feeling ashamed of his love for Edward, or just not wanting to push it on him. I think "love" isn't a word they use out loud, so saying it is hard, but I also think Izzy's being passive because at the moment it does just feel like he "has" love. He doesn't want to actively feel it or offer it up right now, not with the complicated knot of anger and hurt and, tbh, probably some of his own depression. He "has" love because, despite everything, he still loves Edward.

And he does, is the thing! The whole goddamn reason Izzy is here, still trying to be a support for Edward is because he loves him. Literally anybody else would have left by now, or killed Edward, considering he's actively trying to push Izzy to the breaking point. And even at said point, when Izzy's finally standing up for himself, he offers Edward another chance to realize he's loved.

Edward starts dismissing him the moment he says the l-word, but Izzy continues:

"I'm worried about you - we all are. The atmosphere on this ship is completely poisoned. But if we could all just, maybe... talk it through?"

Izzy knows what's wrong and while he didn't originally think Stede was that important to Edward, he's put it together by now. And he's a huge fan of trying to talk through their problems, tries it multiple times even in the peak communication failure / stress powderkeg of S1, so of course he tries one last time to get Edward to accept he's not alone.

Instead, he accidentally invokes the ghost of Stede Bonnet and reminds Edward why he's doing all of this in the first place. Reminds him that he is unlovable while having the audacity to confess to loving him.

So Edward makes a big show of going out on deck, shoots Izzy in the leg, and tells Frenchie to get rid of him.

Frenchie doesn't, naturally.

And when Edward finds the crew saving the man who he just shot for daring to love him - because of course they are, he's their dick now - well... "He was your friend," Jim spits in his face, having just been thinking about their best friend (who they are more than a little bit in love with 👀).

How long do we think Edward stands there, looking at what he's wrought? How long does he sit at Izzy's bedside, looking at him "rather still" while he weighs if the missing leg proves his point where the toes didn't?

And you know Izzy's love is so bone deep and rooted in that it's unconditional by this point, because Edward did NOT prove his fucking point. Nothing he's done so far is enough to get the man who loves him to pull the fucking trigger. Down 3 toes and then a leg, asking first thing whether Edward was there for the other one, and STILL. STILL IZZY IS HEARTBROKEN AT THE REALIZATION THAT EDWARD IS READY TO END IT FOR REAL.

Still he won't pull the trigger himself. Not on Edward, at least.

And only after Izzy is gone can Edward return the words.

"I loved you. Best I could."

*screaming crying tearing at the walls*

He loved him.

HE LOVED HIM.

Edward's perspective of his relationships is fundamentally warped. Alongside his self-image. Probably has been for most of his life, going back to the self-hatred he ties to killing his dad. Stede leaving hurt him immensely (and predictably, Stede) in ways Stede will have to own up to, but it was Edward's own unaddressed issues - independent of Stede AND Izzy - that determined the appropriate response to that hurt was "realize that vulnerability and hope are lies and every dark voice in the back of your mind ever was telling the truth, actually."

Edward's conviction that nobody loves him and that he's not capable of successfully loving someone back is literally his depression talking. It is not rationally based in the reality of his life or relationships, Stede or otherwise. He may even have successfully beat back the sentiment for most of his life, with that getting harder and harder as time went on.

(He's expressed this kind of depressive-episode-driven warped view before, btw, and they explicitly parallel it in Purgatory just for me! The flashbacks of the bathtub scene while he attacks the spectre of Hornigold are my huge W in that episode. "It all boils down to this - you're afraid you're unlovable", said by the actual manifestation of Edward's suicidal self-hatred in Purgatory, is the new "That's why I don't have any friends." I think it's fair to question if he was a reliable narrator of his experiences back then, too. Jim and the crew certainly think he had at least one friend.)

Basically, "Best I could" now can mean a lot of things before. Young Izzy and Edward could have been much healthier than they are at present. Probably were, to be honest. It wasn't enough to save them from going sour, but it could explain why they've stuck together so long even as it has.

Izzy loves Edward. Edward loves Izzy.

LOVE LOSES. BUT LOVE WINS 😭😭😭

---

Kraken Era = Murder-Suicide, but Edward Wants to be the Murdered One

So, uh... *scrambling for notes* Where am I going with this? Fuck, I'm not even writing it linearly... OK!

Izzy KNOWS Edward - knows him going back ages, has seen his darkest and weakest moments - and even after 3 toes and a stress breakdown he still LOVES him enough to say it out loud (which I doubt these guys do, uh, ever). Which really throws a wrench in Edward's "Stede realized I'm inherently toxic and unlovable" theory, and prompts him to redouble his "prove to Izzy he doesn't love me" efforts by casually shooting him.

Afterward, he finally makes his passive suicidal intents explicit when talking (practically sobbing, in truth) to Frenchie:

"Never going back to land. We're gonna sail, rob, raise hell forever and ever, without end."

He's set on it, now. Izzy's potential last act was to finally rip down the illusion, give name to the hurt Edward had been running from since he first put on his Kraken makeup. So he pushes his little wedding toppers out the window, cleans himself up, and goes out to wave every single red flag imaginable for poor Frenchie's locked box.

Except it wasn't Izzy's last act, now was it?

But that's fine for Edward. That actually works better. He wants the hopeless situation to end, but he doesn't want to pull the trigger himself or he would have done it by now. After everything, surely Izzy should be ready to murder-suicide him??? He can't still love him, not after Edward so effectively proved he's exactly as toxic as his self-loathing depressive episodes say he is. It's poetic.

Edward underestimates Izzy. Knows him with his head, but the depression makes him underestimate his heart.

Edward doesn't get a bullet through the head, be hears the gun go off and - well - that's one way to spin "not even Izzy loves me any more" into a true statement.

Edward wants to live slightly more than he wants everything to end. It's the only reason he's alive. Before Izzy said Stede's name he was floating high on denial like that bird who never lands, keeping his depression and his destruction as a blast radius more than a dagger. He was lurching in the direction of dying by combat or by crew mutiny or by simple self-destructive behaviors, but he avoided thinking about anything long enough to have intent.

After Izzy's desperate attempt to intervene, Edward can't hide from his own reasoning anymore. Or his hurt. Or his self-enforced hopelessness. And with that comes aims. He has his rough night and then starts the massive red flag upswing. Cleans up. Gets ready for the big finale. He pushes Izzy with the "closure" conversation, trying to find a pressure point that will get him killed to close off the narrative with a artful bow.

Murder-suicide sounds like a fix to his problems, but he still wants to live slightly more. He still can't turn the gun on himself. He aims to be the murdered one.

After Izzy is gone, though, by Edward's own actions? That's the last straw he needs to commit in full. Thanking Frenchie? Just another final goodbye to get his affairs in order. "Take the day off, brother. Go live." The moment Izzy dies they all become dead men walking.

Thank FUCK that Edward a) still would prefer it if they snapped and murdered him / something out of his control killed him (he still wants to live), and b) still wants to die dramatically. A different man would have walked right back to his cabin and not missed.

Sidebar to appreciate the breakup boat crew some more because I love them:

Fang: "So... do we think he's better?" Jim: "Fuck no!"

Edward is ready to be the murderer with his cannon pointed at the mast, but he stalls on damning the whole crew to a watery grave (r.i.p. half of them), gives Izzy time to wake up and drag himself out to protect said crew, and then finally gets what he's been after.

Edward's motivations are already perfectly clear, but just to really hammer it in - he thinks he just drove a man he loved to suicide, and then he demands the couple he found kissing fight to the death with the reasoning:

"All love dies, I'm just hastening the process."

Jim literally just learned last season that was bullshit, my guy. It makes sense they are the one who finally puts a stop to him.

(Except the cannonball doesn't hit. There's no head wound. And Edward is alive when they take him back to the secret room, laying him out respectfully instead of letting the waves take him too. They don't even know if they'll survive. They certainly don't have anywhere to take the body, or a working ship to get there. Maybe they didn't notice because they didn't want to notice.)

(AND EDWARD STILL WANTS TO LIVE)

Both Izzy and Edward try to die. Both of them do - maybe, in the bottom of their hearts - want to live just a tiny bit more. They shoot each other. They say OUT LOUD they love each other (though Edward I swear to fuck you better say that to Izzy's face ohmygod). They are on this journey together.

BOTH OF THEM LIVE. AND NOW THEY HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT.

(I feel like I wanted to add stuff about Stede & Izzy meeting again but like. I don't even know. Izzy doesn't even know. Is he protecting the crew? Deflecting? Edward's dignity (-ish)? Stede's good opinion of Edward? Dealing with his own massively fucked headspace? Ask me again on Friday. Fuck.)

My fucked up guys are in toxic fucked up LOVE!!!

[theratlivinginyourcouchcushions]

Equivalence AU Mabel ideas!

I wanted to experiment with God!zar(?) Mabel, bc I hadn’t seen any designs for it yet. I was also going to try drawing Mabel in her super-demon-y form, (which is apparently blinding white with abyss for eyes and tiny burning pupils) but was two invested in the outfit to really lean into it.

Now for some of my headcannons!

While drawing Mabel, I started thinking about her bird wings, and what kind of traits she might have similar to animals (like dipper and cats) and then it hit me. BIRDS.

An entire class of animals characterized by their ability to DEFY GRAVITY FOR HOURS TO DAYS AT A TIME. (And the ones that don’t are pretty cool too) and I got to thinking about how cool birds are, to achieve this through nothing but MILLIONS of years of evolution. (My thoughts on this are not very organized, but I hope you get the gist.) so anyway, what cool things do birds do, and wouldn’t it be cool if Mabel did them too?

Mating dance. Since it’s pretty much canon that Mizar is still alloromantic and allosexual, wouldn’t it be goofy if she would do a funky little dance when trying to ask people out? (She definitely did this for Henry as soon as she was corporeal for him)

Roosting. Basically making nests in high places out of things she likes, probably perches in it to preen her feathers. (I originally had a similar hc for Alcor, but whatever, they’re demons. But maybe he roosts like a bat instead:) )

Preening. She has a set of ridges under her lip (in front of her gums) for preening her feathers. Her loved ones have little tools to mimic them, and help her get hard-to-reach places. (She often falls asleep during this, similar to Dipper with his hair.)

Migration. I’m still not super organized with this one, but she might try to take off during the winter for long periods of time before coming back, or maybe just circling around to get out energy. Either that or she just tells people that she’s flying south for the winter when she doesn’t want to hang out with them. (This was also a hc meant for Dipper, but now I’m wondering if he tries to hibernate during winter.)

So those were my Equivalence AU headcannons, now for the design choices I made!

I talked a little bit about them at the start, but I still want to talk about it so, here we go!

The fashion was all based on @that-ghosts-art / @that-ghost-pal ‘s Mabel/Mizar designs, and I was very happy for the chance to test out different fashion styles, as well as the braid and shifting tattoos. (For the tattoos I just drew whatever I felt like at the time, and I added a scorpion barb at the end of the braid just for fun.) I added gold-tipped feathers to the wings, and some extra pink bits in her eyes (except for the angry one) I also gave her a crown instead of a top hat.

For God!zar(?) I tried to give her wings a more feather-y feeling than God!cor’s, and made the chest star more like her symbol on the cipher wheel. I muted the colors, and messed with her crown bc God!cor’s hat is a halo, and I didn’t want to copy that directly. I struggled with the hair color for a while before deciding to just bite the bullet, so please excuse any eye scorching color choices (It was originally planned for galaxy hair, but that was given to the wings, and I’m not great with overlapping colors)

Thanks for reading this far into my ramblings, and take a few moments to marvel at the existence of birds (and bats!)

Edit: I’m just now realizing that I forgot to draw the fire.

[hellishdeer]

Live reactions and ramblings about the the two new episodes of Hazbin Hotel

Warnings: SPOILERS!!! Same as the previous post, Incoherent, unfiltered thoughts, I wrote them as I was watching. Most of them are in chronological order, but not all

EPISODE 5:

Husk's mug can I have one too

Charlie has all of the Egg Boiz contacts, so that means they all their own phones Sir Pentious is such a good dad

LUCIFER IS SUCH A SILLY DORK OH MY GOD???

Everyone being so into Charlie's call with Lucifer (especially Sir Pentious)

SIR PENTOUS CAN BAKE.

Alastor saying "fuck you" was something I wasn't expecting 💀

Sir Pentious passing out the second he was addressed pfft-

ALASTOR ACTUALLY CARES ABOUT CHARLIE.. LIKE AS A DAUGHTER??? (It's possible he was just trying to mess with Lucifer, but Alastor was glaring at him the second he stepped into the hotel so-)

MIMZY!!! We finally meet!! I love her voice!

ALASTOR KNEW MIMZY WHEN THEY WERE ALIVE :O

Alastor's owl neck snap :D

"Big talk coming from someone who is also on a leash." EXCUSE ME?

Loan sharks lmao

Sir Pentious saving Nifty from the falling rubble while being very polite about it, I love him sm

ALASTOR FUCKING 👏 SHIT 👏 UP 👏

Husk and Angel brining out popcorn for the drama 😭

ALASTOR ACTUALLY CARES ABOUT THE HOTEL HOLY SHI-

Lucifer's and and Charlie's duet is just.. Beautiful. It hit me especially hard because I've been watching these episodes with my dad, who isn't nearly as into Hazbin Hotel as I am, but he knows it's important for me ❤️ he also got a little emotional at the song

EPISODE 6:

Charlie packing bunch of stuff for a 5 hour trip 😭❤️

The same poor wall getting blown up again lol

Sir Pentious being into Cherri I-💀

Emily is so sweet, I love her already

MOLLY IS THAT YOU??!?

Sera only agreeing to the extermination to keep heaven safe.. Seems that Adam is one of the rare few actually enjoying this-

VAGGIE WAS AN EXTERMINATOR WHO GOT KICKED OUT OF HEAVEN FOR NOT WANTING TO KILL A CHILD?!??!

"Low blow, Karen." ffs 💀

"Consent" is a good name for a sex club-

Sir Pentious calling Nifty "dear" HE'S SO SWEET I CAN'T

"I'm buying everyone a drink!" You're going to be broke Pentious 💀

Cherri seems to be a good friend to have fun with, but she isn't at all responsible, I really wanted to like her more :/ I mean I don't know what I was expecting but still

ANGEL DUST LOOKING AFTER NIFTY 🥹❤️

"You wanna go play with the kitty?" "...Yeah." 😭😭❤️❤️

"BECAUSE I'M HAVING SEX WITH EVERYONE!" PENTIOUS NO-

"I might have to put up with your bullshit, but you ain't fucking with my friends." TELL 👏 HIM 👏 GET FUCKED VALENTINO

So.. No one knows how to get into heaven??? Great system you've got there.

OOO ADAM YOU FUCKED UP-

"Sera, please tell me you didn't know?!" OUCH.

THAT ONE SHOT OF VERA IS TERRYFYING.

CHARLIE AND EMILY TEARING IT UP LIKE THE QUEENS THEY ARE 👑👏

OH NOO CHARLIE'S FACE OF BETRAYAL OW.

"Charlie don't give up on this, I'll figure something out, I promise!!" :(

You could become a fallen angel by questioning things.. Yeah sounds about right.

[docholligay]

Hm, this puts to mind of something, and I'm about to ramble so forgive me if you can.

I am a person of high standards, let's say, and I think my only saving grace in all this is that I am equally hard on myself.

Sometimes I want to beat my ass in a bathroom, I get so mad at myself. "Why can you not just shut up?? Why do you have to be so critical? Can you chill out for literally five fucking seconds, jesus christ you are impossible to like!"

I'm hyperactive and dogged and loud and impulsive and a million other fucking irritating things that I often wish I was not (What would it be like to be one of those people who can be quiet and still?) But chief among them, is that I am so fucking aggressive, and so argumentative, and so stubborn.

This is something I am constantly working on and it feels fucking SISYPHEAN, and literally my only real improvement is I no longer fucking hit people. I genuinely get so upset with myself, because my NATURE is so unlikeable sometimes*. It's a goddamn miracle i have friends at all.

I get upset at myself about these things sometimes. Though I guess not upset enough or I would figure out how to change it, but I digress.

So. A year ago? Maybe two. A friend and I were talking in a group, and I don't even remember quite what about, but I think I said something to the effect of the above, that I am sometimes a junkyard dog and I annoy myself. And she said something I think about a lot, about anything being able to be used to the good, and about shochets (a kosher butcher) specifically, and how people who have the sort of personality to do that are needed, too, not just people who do 'nicer things.

I doubt she remembers saying it, it very likely wasn't an important moment to her, but it is the small comfort I give myself sometimes when I get frustrated with myself. AGAIN. I think, "Well, someone needs to kill the sheep the right way and all that."

And then I try to think about the fact that I am the person people call if they need to move out of their ex's house. I'm the person who won't let someone get in front of you in line at a crowded bar. I'm the person who will call your insurance five times with detailed notes. I'm the person who gets the money back from Delta. I'm the person, today, who was asked to bring up something at the congregation board meeting because I'm happy to get into a fight. I protect my friends. I fight for my community. I'll kill the sheep, fuck it. Has to be done.

So even I, rough though I am, have my purpose in this life. This is no excuse for me not to work on, you know, being a nasty piece of work, but I have my uses. I am a sharp object. Anyway, these sort of things always get me thinking about the things I don't love about myself, but then I come back to that memory of the shochet, and having my uses.

ANYWAY SORRY I WARNED YOU THIS GOT INSANELY LONG

Regrettably, I am not the person to teach you to do anything politely ahahha. I however absolutely can back your play in any situation! You know you're in trouble when I really get that rural growl on.

*I know literally everybody likes Mercymorn because she is great, but I have to tell you I did not intend to feel so deeply about a character in a Muir book, nor identify with one so clearly, but I think about that line, “This is the chance for unloveable Mercymorn–critical Mercymorn–to show you that she is the most capable of her name.” All. The. Time. God. Kills me.

[shreddedleopard]

I am absolutely bursting at the seams to scream about Morimyu Op 3.

Wanna write a very structured, intelligent analysis post but I don’t even know where to begin. Just … all of it.

— incoherent rambling about Moriarty the Musical Op 3 in-coming so quick — scroll if you don’t wanna see!

The way William’s yearning is portrayed. And Sherlock’s frustration. All the little references to Sherlock being a puppet on William’s strings. The way William is so infuriating and yet heartbreaking in the same breath. I totally get what Shogo meant when he once said, ‘it would be nice if William could be honest.’

The songs.

Spinning Around the Rondo? That entire spectacle. The lyrics, but also the way William steers and manoeuvres Sherlock at his whim … and the fact that they’re dancing with one another. I just. The metaphors. It was everything I needed from them.

I also love how we see the theme of the scarlet thread connecting them — this idea that they’re both attached but William is the one literally ‘pulling the strings’ — again in the scene with the Jack the Ripper culprits murdered. William tugging on an invisible string as he leaves and Sherlock immediately turning up to investigate. Chills.

In This Lonely Room I think is my favourite song from all 5 Opuses. When I say my jaw hit the floor … the dialogue from Albert beforehand — “you seem quite taken with him” ????? Umm. Okay. So it’s not just us then 😂 WILLIAM. You have been perceived 👀

And Shogo’s perfect called-out expression. But the pain in his eyes like … he doesn’t want to be made to face reality. He was having fun with his own little delusions and fixation with Sherlock. He was living in happy denial. Why do you have to go and be all voice of reason and ruin it, Albert?? “It will only hurt you.” EXCUSE ME is this advice on dealing with an unhealthy crush from your older brother time? I DIED.

But anyway. The song. Oh god, the song. Shogo sang it so beautifully and emotionally it made my soul ache for William and he’s like … he’s got this little glimmer of hope in Sherlock and when he LIES ON THE SOFA and sings TO HIS HAND LIKE A LOVER and then CLUTCHES IT TO HIS HEART. I cannot. Breathe.

What were they thinking? HOW can anyone be normal about them after witnessing that?

All of the songs in the second half pretty much ended me, to be honest.

I’m not sure how many times two people need to sing about having each other in their hearts to get the message across. I heard it the first time. And the second. And the third. BOYS PLEASE I UNDERSTAND don’t make it hurt more.

And then … the Durham date? THE DURHAM DATE!?

Ryo’s acting here was so good. The range of emotions he goes through during his talks with William — from notice me senpai to omfg challenge accepted to oh god we just sang about changing the world together do we really have to return to the weighty matter of why I came here — the LOC — after that? To oh shit you really do want someone to stop you to actually the RELIEF because that means you are a good person underneath it all if it’s really you — and I hope it is because I want you to be as obsessed with me as I am with you.

WILLIAM’S SHERLOCK AFTER HE LEAVES? The way he smiles so full it’s visible even with the dimming lights.

And then the final song … the repetition and switching of ‘I hope’ and ‘I will.’

I now fully understand why Morimyu twitter cannot stop saying those phrases and I am fully with everyone because ever since watching Op 2 they have been echoing in my mind but NOW — now I feel them in my bones like a bloody mantra.

Yes, I am dramatic about this. What of it?

😂😭🥹🤦🏼‍♀️

(Not even gonna start on Op 4 because that also broke me in very specific ways but it still comes in hard second to Op 3 my love.)

[gasstationclown]

im gonna do a rambly thing because this is a rambly thing thats been in my brain and its actually sort of coherent and im incapable of shutting up so i want to share it. it also happens to be ace attorney because. ace attorney is running my life rn. but see more for said rambly thing (which will make the above make more sense, probably)

as much as i love the idea of the scene where apollo and klavier first meet, apollo looking at klavier and being Very Queer and klavier being like "ive never been looked at this way by a man before" and also being Very Queer, i dont think thats exactly what it is.

as ive mentioned a tiny little bit in a previous post, kristoph and klavier are nearly identical, and its kind of eerie how similar they actually are. theyre both easy to anger (though kristoph is a little more subtle until his breakdown) and tend to show this by hitting solid objects (wall for klavier, witness stand for kristoph); they have the same hair (which klavier seems to hav copied from kristoph); they both have sprites/animations of moving their hair out of their eyes, though klaviers is more sweet and suave while kristophs is more annoyed and disgruntled; kristoph has a sprite/animation where he kind of flicks his wrist and shakes his head, and klavier snaps his fingers (in the same general area); they both wear purple; they both wear glasses (klaviers sunglasses) with the same shape. the point is that they mirror each other

but, they are also fundamentally DIFFERENT. klaviers style is obviously rock n roll while kristophs is more traditional gentlemanly, and klaviers purple is much darker in comparison to kristophs. when klavier laughs, his head is tilted downward, but when kristoph laughs (in the flashback of what happened after the trial) his head is tilted up. kristoph tends to hold himself while klavier is much more loose. while they both tend to talk down to people, kristoph is more belittling and purposeful while klavier doesnt exactly seem to realize the wwords that are coming out of his mouth and just think hes being cool, yknow, like his brother. but, point is, theres a clear difference between them

you may be saying, "ok man can you just get to your point this is really stupid and youre dragging it on and its really hard to read paragraphs when you type so poorly" and to that i say yeah! i know! just hold on!

when apollo first sees klavier, he is HORRIFIED. a man so similar to his old mentor, the man that was supposed to teach him everything there was to being a defense attorney, the man that he helped send to jail on account of MURDER, appearing out in the open, so free and smiling. apollo is in terror and klavier somehow equates this to "i must look SO fine that this guy is giving me the same look women give me 😏" (which, i dont know what that says about the women he sees but) and completely misinterprets apollo looking him up and down in shock (apollo also literally says "mr. gavin?")

the reason apollo just seems to shit on klaviers person so much is because of how goddamn similar he is to kristoph, and he cant shake the feeling. and i think he recognizes that klavier and kristoph are NOT the same person, that klavier is not the same as kristoph, but he cant change that everywhere he sees klavier, he just sees kristoph in his place. and apollo cant find it in himself to be able to put a little trust in klavier being he just gives him this Icky Feeling.

i dont think apollo WANTS to hate klavier for being klavier either!! in turnabout serenade (i think?), when apollo and trucy go to talk to klavier on the stage, klavier greets them and apollo gives him an awkward "hiya". hes trying to be nice and polite and bypass his flight or fight responses but it comes out strained and uncomfortable. its much easier to say you dont like someone because theyre arrogant and whatever as an excuse than to say that oh my god, they look/act like someone who has made lasting damage/impact on your life. some jealously aspects could come from apollo thinking that klavier has it so easy despite also being horrendously betrayed by someone close to you because klavier just seemed to bounce back just like that.

i dont exactly know where to put this point, but after the first case and kristoph gets sent to prison, klavier literally cannot be lead by kristoph anymore. his brother isnt watching his every move, and he cant use klavier anymore (whether klavier was aware or not). theres just klavier, his own person

but, ok, whatever whatever, whats with the pictures. this one i can summarize easily, actually. in thinking [all of the above], i also thought of what would break the mirage apollo has floating around klavier at all times, and i think that would be something along the lines of klavier doing something that apollo physically cannot imagine kristoph doing as well. in this case, its kneeling down in the mud trying to find his key ring and then getting mud in his hair and being so oblivious to it. kristoph just isnt the type. and i think something like that would give apollo a moment of thought and realization. and then some like rivals to lovers stuff happens idk this post is over

[the-zapped-part-timer]

Penn Zerothon Day 6

Flurgle Burgle🪐

My Ramblings: FINALLY! PROPER SCHOOL SCREEN TIME! We saw it very briefly with the That Purple Girl.

There's symbolism in the Trio's respective lunches: Boone's a fancy and has all he needs, Penn's a a damn mess and Sashi's has something she doesn't want and has to do with her brother.

I want branded Goodbye Pony merch. I want that lunchbox and another item I'll bring up later on. Who has it? We'll see.

Hmmm, jumpy Sashi hopped up on sugar. Wonder what that would look like. Poor Terry, being a school mascot is the most dangerous job.

Penn is just realizing that Sashi's kind of goes overboard as a sidekick... all the time? He's learning, he's figuring things out.

As I've brought the whole Space World inconsistency, Penn doesn't recognize the world. Maybe the episodes were supposed to be swapped or was just a slight oversight. Like I said, doesn't really matter that much. Just observation.

World takes place years after 2715, noted.

I've only had Flurgle for a day and a half. But anything happens to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself - Boone, probably.

Out of context, please!:

Penn speaking to Flurgle: Get out of here, you weird little space pig. Papa's got to go to work.

Boone: I know, and don't call me space pig.

Iconic Flurgle-Penn. Kind of terrifying to look at for so long.

Boone... why is he so mean to Sashi in this episode? I get he cares for Penn and the Flurgle but jeez, chillax.

Oh my god, Rippen is making fun of Penn for shitting in the bushes! Now, they're even. God, this show can be pretty funny. What's with prehensile noses this episode? Flurgle and the Shnurkons.

Boone, look, it is cute to catch all this on your futuristic flip-phone, but help with the mission! Penn has an excuse, you don't. I get it, Sashi shouldn't have shot her laser blaster in the ship, but she didn't mean for this to happen! Also people are going to die if you don't find those fuel crystals! You're all up in Penn's business but than you just pawn him off to Sashi because now he has "too much energy?" When he's on a leash!? Also they say "how can we win the mission without our hero!" So does Penn have to be the one to win? Answer: no... I'll bring it up where that does happen. That's a whole other can of worms!

The also iconic "Front Row Seat Quarrel." Never seen Larry get so heated about a subject or towards Rippen this much, or at all at this point. It's amazing, they should be allowed to both have more quarrels like this more often. Larry doesn't always have to be a happy-go-lucky yes-man to Rippen, he can have attitude just as much as him! Love the saltiness. Boone is thriving off the drama.

Subtle Wilhelm Scream!

Good that Boone does come around in the end, yes, she did a little oopsie, but it's ok, people screw up. I think, Boone severely overreacted to the situation. Very much like this conversation between the two, haven't had that yet. And we get the big reveal! Sashi's parents don't know she's a sidekick and think she works at Fish Stick on a Stick (the place Rippen and Larry go to zap). This does bring up a question though: she claims she's been training to be a sidekick for 13 years, that's how old she is in the show... how? Her parents didn't know about any of that. Also get confirmation that Boone's parents are part-timers.

"They can't be proud of what they don't know, so I have to be proud of myself. An today I'm not" An incredibly hard hitting line. Larry's just listening in... that would've been interesting if he brought that up in Sensitivity Training, it does come before The Kobayashis... so.

RIGHT THERE! Larry's strength is shown once again with that powerful kick! Even Boone points it out!

Rippen just pulling out a laser glock on some kids will never not be funny.

"Flurgle, come!" Are very dangerous words.

Rippen, why are you belittling her as a sidekick? The one you call "the competent one!" That was pointless.

Deus Ex Flurgle. Rippen trying Penn like a dog and even calling him a "bad hero!" Gold. Get his ankles, Penn!

We finally see Sashi's place! YAY! And her parents! Double yay! I may not know Star Trek but I do know George Takei when I hear him! Speaking of Penn and Boone being as Sashi's place, interesting how she reacts the next time they come over, very different tune.

The cake... I want it.

~The Characters~

Penn Zero: He flurgled and burgled it up at the club today! He was a free spirit! He shat in the bushes!

Boone Wiseman: Why was he so snappy? Like I said above, he was a bit out of character to me. I could be wrong, just why so aggressive towards her? She made a mistake, but it didn't hurt Penn... kinda? She didn't mean to.

Sashi Kobayashi: Another Sashi episode! Really wanted it to hit harder, but Boone kind of miffed it a bit to me. But overall, is it better than Chuckle City? I don't know.

Rippen: Got a little too cocky with Penn out of the way and look what happened, you still lost!

Larry: The Front Row Seat Quarrel™️ will be one of my favorite Larry scenes.

Dimension(s): Never watched Star Trek, so... space! It's out there!

Forms: Fine, I guess. Nothing really for me. Alien designs are good, Boone's murder mittens hand were interesting, and the Shnurkons overall are fun to look at.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Temple of the Porcelain God🚽

My Ramblings: Very unique episode, it's a sort of flashback-ish type with some flavor. I'm sure there's a term for it, I just can't think of it. Is it reverse chronology or inverted narrative? love how it's through the movie screen, because hey, this is a movie theater after all!

Lives in peril and a giant toilet monster trying to get them... unique to say the least. Showing a completed mission to teach a lesson, what lesson? We'll learn along the way!

Boone loves magazines! This time his mom made onto the cover of "Beef World Mag" for the third time in a row, good for her. We also see Boone's address, time to dox him (it's not real I tried looking):

278 North Street, Middleburg 110406. My guess? Either Florida or Virginia (because there are towns called Middleburg in each).

I'd enjoy watching a 7-hour Director's Cut of... whatever! Show me!

What an oddly specific black market, bathroom themed... anyways obviously inspired by Indiana Jones, which makes this so much funnier with the whip scene. If some of you don't know, Alfred Molina (Rippen's VA) was Satipo in the first film, the guy who also literally said: "Throw me the idol, I'll throw you the whip!" Iconic. Sam, Jared, I see you guys, good meta humor! Too bad the film didn't follow this scene, I know it wouldn't fit, but it's funny to think about. Someone should make this an animatic or redo that scene with this scene... if you get what I mean.

Also very interesting that Penn and co are returning the idol not STEALING IT. Hmmm.... very interesting choice. An upgrade to me over the film (I wasn't to fond of it, sorry).

Penn slight voice crack when he delivers: "Their whip doesn't even reach 16 feet." Is great, love it.

Such a gentlemen indeed, what a pussy Rippen is. Probably acted surprised because, it's Larry, nothing bad rarely happens to him, Rippen calls that out in this episode.

Get the iconic "Flip-flops are my thang" and see that's on the back of his shirt! Just for this episode, I think.

Penn has got some strong legs for him to catch and carry Boone while swing through the air. Look at his legs! They would snap like twigs! Glad that we're bring back man purses, yay!

How and when did Sashi get under the truck thing? Don't question it, she just is under it and as soon as Rippen sees her drop out from underneath with a screw, he knew it was all over.

Great little railway ride for all involved until Rippen just picks up Larry and chucks him Penn... with one hand! "How is it that you never get hurt?" Great question, Rip.

WILHELM SCREAM RIP EDITION! I'm assuming it's him.

Of course, the best exchange ever:

Larry: Don't worry, I'm okay! Rippen's soft body broke my fall.

Rippen: Can't some things be private?

Penn doesn't give to cents as to where Boone is, just the idol. Savage.

How does the Ominous Voice how warns Boone not to flush, know to call him Boone and not his zapped body's name? Maybe he heard Penn not caring about Boone?

Penn is still not over the fact that is indeed Boone's scream, did he just think it was a bit or something?

Penn is brave about just diving into an ancient toilet, everyone clap for him. No one else would. He's disgusting now.

Classic Indiana Jones hat grab but flip-flop addition.

I'm on Boone's side, paper comes over the top not out the bottom for your bottom... Penn, I'm sorry, buy your just wrong. Who ever sides with Penn, why!? Change your wicked ways (and have a nice day)! I'm just as passionate as Boone. I'm glad that Penn listened like a sane person.

My favorite part of that movie is the credits, everyone, clap for Phyllis! She worked her ass off!

So what did they do wrong? Nothing... yep! Best mission ever! Lesson is: help toilet.

Clap again for Phyllis for giving them real golden crowns! I'd sadly also probably melt it down for cash like Sashi. Love her reaction.

WENDY WISEMAN AND MR. WISEMAN CAMEO! Seriously, what's his name? Maybe I'll call him... Wesley. Also, take back the clapping, Phyllis committed the most heinous crime of eating Boone's meatloaf. How dare you!? Down with Phyllis!

~The Characters~

Penn Zero: He's disgusting now. Never touch him, him stink of toilet water for the rest of his days!

Boone Wiseman: He will never forgive Phyllis for her abhorrent crime against humanity.

Sashi Kobayashi: Almost murdered two men, good for her! Hope she gets that cash from that melted crown.

Rippen: He and Larry were just along for the ride, really.

Larry: Do you think they've ever explored each other's bodies?

Dimension(s): Very fun take on an ancient temple but bathroom themed! Lot's of fun uses and designs. Like the plunger bridge, the bathtub railway and all the architecture! The humor is a little on the nose, literal toilet humor, but it works here... and only here.

Forms: Again, all good. Weird to see Sashi as a blonde with short hair but it's really cute. Rippen and Larry's designs of course I really like, Larry looks so huggable with that outfit and beard!