#god i remember seeing a reposted version of this on facebook and reading it out to my friends at the lunch table like 8-9 years ago

[rev-pirate]

Happy 10 year Anniversary to Tumblr Heritage Post Thrift Shoppe by Pixlriffs 

[lightofraye]

Portrait Of A Woman

Yes, another version of this. Deal. 😆

I'm always changing and growing, revising my life and what I'm blogging about. I joke that I'm a gossip columnist (because I do refer to other celebrities besides Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles), but it's only to share my other interests.

So what are my interests? The purpose behind this blog?

Many things. I title it Ramblings Of A Writer for a reason. I write and boy, do I ramble!

I’ll also be redoing my masterlists to make it easier for folks to find certain posts. I won’t be redoing posts—no need to do that, but perhaps reposting information being redone. Like “Version 2 with new stuff” or better organized information and having those on the masterlists instead.

Let's begin with me:

Who am I?

My online nickname: Raye

Pronouns: She/her

Astrology: (Western) Pisces, (Eastern) Metal Monkey

Country: United States

I am anti (and I make no apologies):

Anti Danneel/Anti Elta

Anti Misha

Anti AAs

Anti Destiel

Anti Hellers

Anti Cockles

Anti Abuse

My ‘custom’ tags:

#Jensen Supportive (I believe I'm the originator)

#Music Choices by lightofraye

#lightofraye on abuse

I also frequently use #Jensen Concern, though I am not the originator (like I thought I was!).

What I’m reading:

Fictional: The Dresden Files, currently Battle Ground and Peace Talks

Non-fiction: The Body Keeps The Score

Where am I at with my writing:

BA Script: Judging by the math… 1/2 of the way through. Loving it! First draft!

Pre-plotting my horror/thriller

Vikings? VIKINGS!

So many more planned. Someone knock out my muse. 😅

What am I watching?

Burn Notice (finally getting the last season!)

Daredevil (again!)

Once Upon A Time

Supernatural (forever and ever, ahem)

The Good Place

A Discovery of Witches

About this blog:

I really, honest to gods, did not start this blog to be an anti. I know my anons would disagree with me and claim I always “hated” Danneel, but that just isn’t the truth. I came to Tumblr to find a new kind of social media as I was feeling soured by Facebook, disliked how Twitter had changed, escaped Livejournal years ago, not a fan of Reddit, and the “newer” social media sites weren’t my thing. Plus I’ve kept seeing hilarious screenshots from Tumblr on Facebook and decided to check it out!

I initially started by following pages about Supernatural, Sam and Dean Winchester, the actors Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles. I did not go seeking anti-Danneel posts; they more or less fell into my lap. When I started reading a few posts, something clicked in my mind, explained why I was struggling with how I felt about her. I kept analyzing her behavior for a long while, what she said, and thought maybe something was being seen by fans that wasn’t being seen by me.

The explanations made sense. I felt I could breathe again. That’s when I remembered the least recognized method of abuse: emotional and mental. That fit Danneel to a T. Especially the more I looked into what she’s said and wrote over the years and saw how Jensen behaved around her in videos and photos. Even when they were supposedly trying to push the “happy couple” narrative, it just did not look true. Especially given Jensen’s talent as an actor! If he couldn’t even fake being happy or in love with her….

So I’m an Anti-Danneel. I’m also Anti-Misha for his behavior over the years, towards Jared, towards Jensen, the lies he’s peddled and keeps peddling. (For instance, no, Castiel would not have ‘fucked’ Dean upon pulling him out of Hell. No, CW was not being homophobic.)

I am absolutely very pro-Jared and pro-Jensen. I know, I know…. “But Raye, you’ve written posts criticizing Jensen! How can you be pro-Jensen??”

My answer is a variation of this: “Because I care! I am not blind to the flaws of either men! I am wildly concerned about Jensen, about what seems—to me—as excessive drinking, ‘empty’ eyes, unhappy and stressed smiles.”

For the vast majority of the AAs, it seems I’m not pro-Jensen if I don’t see him as flawless, a god upon the perfect pedestal, the Ken doll That breaks my heart. He is flawed. He is imperfect. I see more than just the pretty mask. I want to see and know the man. He isn’t just a beautiful trophy for us to ogle.

He’s caught in a rock and a hard place and I acknowledge that hard. It’s just only the negativity is seen and not the love and support. 😕

What can I tell you about me?

I could say so much. I’m the third child of a family of four kids, and the only daughter. (So that was fun.) I’m a gamer, read comics (still read a few, such as ElfQuest), got into reading fantasy books (Dragonlance’s War of the Lance was my first!), have a massive interest in psychology, in wanting to understand the human mind. I’m fluent in two languages—English and American Sign Language.

Ah, that last one might surprise some folks. No, I am not deaf—but my parents, two of my three brothers, and everyone on my mother’s side of the family are. I half-joke that my first language is ASL, not speaking with a voice. It’s not a joke though; it’s more or less accurate.

I’m a writer. I’m working on several screenplays, have plans for novels, dabble in poetry. I’m an amateur artist—have sketched with pencil and Photoshop. I haven’t done so in a while, but I love art. I do a lot under the creative umbrella, and most of it is as an amateur—photography, wishing to learn pottery, and so forth.

I’m a mother. I’m divorced (happily so, trust me). I have born children of my body and I have children of my heart. I have suffered loss deeply profound that I wish people would talk more about so we all realize we aren’t as alone as we fear.

I’m an advocate for better, stronger laws against abuse, of the protection and services for survivors. Largely because I’m a survivor, but also because I give a damn about people. I’ve experienced it all, starting from childhood to my (thankfully) now-ex-husband. I am hoping to start a series of reels explaining the red flags of abuse, how to recognize them, how to get out if you are in an abusive situation, and what organizations exist to contact for help (if any do exist). Keep an eye out for those when I start posting them!

A link to the ever-in-progress masterlist.

First masterlist, largely anti Danneel posts. (My first true anti Danneel post, highly recommend reading it. I am reworking it.) Second masterlist, more anti Danneel. Third masterlist, assorted posts. The links will be defunct due to changing my Tumblr name. So just switch out rrahuntersblog to lightofraye and it'll work. I'm reworking those too! Bear with me! My first About Me. My second About Me Redux.

[lauraramargosian]

The prison within your mind is not worth taking your life.

The demons within your mind, it’s not worth taking your life.

The demons within your mind, it’s not worth taking your life. Taking your own life isn’t your only option.

Taking your own life isn’t your only option. The prison within your mind can be deep, and sometimes those feelings can be so overwhelming the thought of committing suicide becomes an option, and some take that path.

When you’re in high school, you make all sorts of friends, date different boys, feel a slew of emotions and most importantly, do stupid shit with your crew.

Think about it, wasn’t there something either presently or in your past that you still remember, humorously telling your kids or friends about the memory?

There’s no doubt, we all have a story and that’s good, that’s how it should be when you’re young because you learn from each of those situations. In fact, it’s the absolute same for those “celebrities,” that you look up too for strength.

The most famous celebrities in the world have also faced, anxiety, PTSD, bipolar disorders, disease and more because our trials do not discriminate.

In fact, let’s take a look at Robin Williams. Isn’t it true that when he passed, it impacted the world in a huge way?

Robin Williams widow Susan Schneider writes essay about his final months.

Unfortunately, growing up can be incredibly hard for some who are bullied, but you can fight back, all while not stooping to their level.

Sadly, many have been bullied. Sadly, it even happens years after graduation in the work-place, with brand new people, like a horrible cycle.

The prison within your mind can be deep, and sometimes those feelings can be so overwhelming the thought of committing suicide becomes an option, and some take that path. Taking your own life isn’t your only option.

The world will never stop turning regardless of what has been coming your way, good and bad.

All the rivers keep flowing, and the world keeps turning.

I used to have a best friend, now I don’t. How it made me a better person!

Even after 13 Reasons Why, suicides, and sad stories in the media. Bullies still take the halls, and we still keep losing the ones we love.

As someone who has faced some pretty f*cked up times, my emotional mindset sometimes dark, one that tends to linger is our reality.

We lost so many people to suicide, including talent, those we see as our favorite “celebrities,” although, I feel we are all celebrities.

If you visit “Faces of Suicide,” and read the loving stories about their loved ones, I’m going to say it once, as my aunt left this world by suicide.

The website “Faces of Suicide,” may trigger some visitors.

Positive Celebrity clicked one image who brought up Amanda Michelle Todd. The website gives you the opportunity to upload your remembrance.

Todd, Amanda Michelle 27 November 1996 – 10 October 2012 Port Coquitlam British Columbia, Canada

Our Remembrance I wish I could be able to help you, I wish I could have been your friend, I wish I could have been able to avoid this, I wish you could still be here. Now I can only pray for God to protect your soul. Spread your wings, fly and be free angel.

Love from Portugal

It’s a sad truth, and this happens every day. In fact, the National Institute of Mental Health shared insightful statistics.

Robin Williams Son Zak Pushing To Make a Difference, Just Like His Father.

Those restless nights and demons in your head are nothing less than liars. Do your best not to be a stat because you’re worth more than you can imagine.

Suicide is a Leading Cause of Death in the United States

“According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) WISQARS Leading Causes of Death Reports, in 2017:

Suicide was the tenth leading cause of death overall in the United States, claiming the lives of over 47,000 people.

Suicide was the second leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 10 and 34, and the fourth leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 35 and 54. There were more than twice as many suicides (47,173) in the United States as there were homicides (19,510).”

Table 1 shows the ten leading causes of death in the United States and the number of deaths attributed to each cause. Data are shown for all ages and select age groups where suicide was one of the leading ten causes of death in 2017. The data are based on death certificate information compiled by the CDC.

The thought of being sober is hard in our world.

There is an unknown amount of people in the world who feel like suicide is the answer to their problems, and taking their life is the only option because it feels that horrible. Fortunately, we’re here to remind you that everything will be okay, you are going to be okay and regardless of what you are facing, it shall pass.

If you feel like taking your life, talk to someone you trust or call the toll-free National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The service is available to anyone. All calls are confidential. http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

You do matter, you would be missed, someone you least expect loves you and thinks of you daily, you’re not a burden, money doesn’t define your life, the disease doesn’t define who you are and whatever you might be facing, it’s always temporary.

Make the first step, be strong, tell someone you trust and always have a safe zone, stranger friends of the world, we love you. Please don’t choose the option of taking your own life. Reach out, you’re loved.

Blessed be.

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique

Laurara Monique is known by various celebrities as the youngest and kindest celebrity blogger. PCG has been described as a "celebrity safe zone."

Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique was live.

Alright, Fortnite Chapter 2 is dope. Great graphics from what it was as well!

jQuery(document).ready(function() {jQuery(".feed_dynamic_video_classyuafjihzup_page").click(function() {jQuery(this).addClass("fts-vid-div");jQuery(this).removeClass("fts-jal-fb-vid-picture");jQuery(this).prepend('<div class="fts-fluid-videoWrapper fts-fb-video-on-page" ><iframe style="background:none !important" class="video-1530462310533045_634335513763393" src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2F1530462310533045%2Fvideos%2F634335513763393%2F&autoplay=true" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen>

');jQuery( ".feed_dynamic_video_classyuafjihzup_page .fts-greater-than-width-height.fts-fb-video-on-page, .feed_dynamic_video_classyuafjihzup_page iframe" ).css({"height": "405px", "width": "720px"});});});

Alright, Fortnite Chapter 2 is dope. Great graphics from what it was as well!

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique

Wentworth Con: Bringing award-winning Australian drama to the US! Wentworth Con - Los Angeles is about to take over in L.A! This is your chance to meet four of the talented actresses from the series! #DanielleCormack, #LibbyTanner, #TammyMacIntosh, and #CeliaIreland! November 9, 2019. Hyatt Regency LAX. Los Angeles, California.

https://positivecelebrity.news/2019/10/02/wentworth-con-bringing-award-winning-australian-drama-to-the-us/

Wentworth Con: Bringing award-winning Australian drama to the US!

Wentworth Con: Bringing award-winning Australian drama to the US! Check it out right here on positive celebrity gossip and entertainment news!

positivecelebrity.news

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique is feeling silly.

Then again, this is also me when family gets home from Costco! Lol.

1 2    View on Facebook

Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique shared a post.

"Animals are born who they are, accept it, and that is that. They live with greater peace than people do." ― Gregory Maguire

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique shared a post.

Thomas

This is funny had to repost!

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique shared a post.

Hell friggin yes, REZZ! You blow us away every single performance, cannot wait to get the article up. Now, who the heck is ready for #GetFreaky? #V2Presents V2 Presents

+1

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[phynxrizng]

THE FIRST WITCH WARS. AND WHY ITS DIFFERENT TODAY

Source, Pagan ChannelBlogsMore ChannelsPublic SquarePolitics BluePolitics RedBook ClubReligion Library

Found in Pagan ChannelRaise the Horns blog

The First Witch Wars & Why It’s Different Today

April 10, 2016

by Jason Mankey

I’m under no delusions that everyone who practices Witchcraft today will one day drop their brooms and dance together around the cauldron. There are a whole host of differences among the modern strains of the Craft, and while we share a great deal, we don’t share everything. And while my wife and I don’t quite put up a You Are Not Invited sign when our Gardnerian coven meets, the idea is mostly true. Non-initiates are not welcome, and even certain lines in our tradition don’t have a free pass to join us.

From the start Witchcraft has been rather exclusionary. Much of that is because of how the coven was originally structured. Today the phrase “perfect love and perfect trust” is often used willy-nilly and without a lot of thought, but originally that phrase was one of the core tenants of the Craft. The coven represented chosen family, and the only persons allowed in were those who had earned the love and trust of their fellow Witches.

Particular Witch-traditions are also about particular temperaments. Don’t believe in deity? Perhaps our Goddess-centric group won’t be a good fit. Does archaic (and somewhat sexist) sounding language bother you? Then what we say in our circle probably won’t resonate with you.* I love and trust all sorts of people who just aren’t a good fit with our coven and many of them are cognizant enough to realize that.

What I try not to do is judge the Witchcraft of others. The Feri Path is not for me but I still know that it’s a very real and valid path. My friends who practice it are strong and committed Witches and are doing good work. There is no version of the Craft that is “more authentic,” intense, scary, or real. I’m not threatened or jealous of other Witchcrafts, some are just different, and that’s great. When my wife and I go out for ice cream I go for the cookie dough and she goes for the mint-chocolate-chip, I know that the cookie dough isn’t really better because it’s what I prefer, I just know that it’s better for me.

THE FIRST WITCH WARS

When I complain about the current cosmic pissing contests that seems so prevalent in many Witch circles I’m often reminded by well meaning souls that the “Witch Wars” are nothing new, and that’s completely accurate. The first modern Witch War took probably took place in 1958 when Charles and Mary Cardell showed up in the Spiritualist magazine Light claiming to be Wiccens. After failing to impress Doreen Valiente and other established Witches the Cardells went to “war” on Gardnerian Witchcraft,** which culminated in the book/pamphlet Witch by Charles Cardell released under the pen-name Rex Nemorensis.

(1) Witch was meant to be a “tell all” about Gardner and included (alleged) excerpts of the Gardnerian Book of Shadows. Cardell was too cowardly to release his book while Gardner was still alive and released it in 1964 just a few months after Gardner’s death. I don’t like to speak ill of the dead but the Cardells were quite a strange couple (they liked to pass themself off as brother and sister, which they were not), and they faded from history shortly after the release of Witch.

Today they are a curious footnote in Witch history and are probably most famous for being involved in the first public Witch War. The second major Witch dust-up was instigated by someone who would have a lasting impact on Modern Witchcraft, Robert Cochrane (Roy Bowers). Cochrane was one of the first people to go public with a Witchcraft tradition outside of Gerald Gardner’s, and he wasn’t all that nice about it. (In his defense, I’m sure there were lots of Gardnerians behaving badly here too.) In Doreen Valiente’s memoir The Rebirth of Witchcraft  she mentions Cochrane’s desire to have a “Night of the Long Knives” with the people he derisively called Gardnerians.

(3) (And since there were not a whole lot of Witches in England at the time, the whole idea is completely absurd.)*** Cochrane had a combative personality and his friend Evan John Jones once remarked that “he seemed to want to be at loggerheads with most other occultists.” (3) By the time Cochrane was calling for his night of the long knives he was most likely dealing with some sort of serious mental duress. He took his own life shortly after Valiente left his Clan of Tubal Cain in 1966.

There have always been problems in the world of Witchcraft, but I think it’s a lot different today than it was fifty or even twenty years ago. It shows up in people and groups who define their own Witchcraft not by what they do, but what they stand in opposition to. It’s one thing to say “I don’t practice Witchcraft like she does” and another to say “the Witchcraft they practice is not serious” all while not knowing who they truly are. I understand not liking Gerald in 1960, it’s another when all of his past and present initiates are also dismissed out of hand.

Public arguments amongst Witches were also once considered propositions. If you wanted to argue in a public forum about Witchcraft it required a bit of work. You had to get out the type-writer and put together a letter; there were no outlets for immediate criticisms and condemnations. I remember writing letters to editors, it was a pain in the ass, and by the time you were ready to write your letter the anger had probably already passed anyways.

All kinds of arguments were probably avoided due to sheer laziness forty years ago. Even if you got your letter written it often took months for it to appear anywhere, and by that point everyone might have already forgotten about the argument.

Even our most public arguments thirty years ago were still mostly private. They occurred in Pagan magazines, which took a bit of work to track down. In 1993 I didn’t have to worry about my Aunt Donna stumbling across an argument on my Facebook feed about Wiccan privilege.

Today our comments are available for just about anyone to see, and even things posted in private groups can be easily copied and shared with thousands. I wasn’t a big fan of Tarostar in the Green Egg Forum circa 1996, but I also didn’t make copies of his letters and pass them around the campfire, but we kind of do that today when we share something on social media.

Social media makes every argument so immediate and personal. Discussions that might have once occurred over the course of a year unfold over an afternoon. Instead of carefully considered opinions responses are written in minutes, without any time to reflect upon them, and issues of great complexity are simplified into yes or no arguments. Today we share memes and quotes without a second thought as to how others might react to or be hurt by such ideas. Yes, there have always been Witch Wars, but they’ve never played out so publicly before.

There have always been spiteful Witches and there have always been Witches intent on telling everyone that their version of the Craft is superior. But because we communicate with one other so quickly and we have so many immediate public forums the arguments and controversies are bigger.

Twenty years ago you could hide in your Temple Room and just do your shit, and not worry about Witchcraft outside your own walls. Not as possible in the age of Facebook, Twitter, and blogs. Even if you don’t engage in all the mudslinging you still see and are even possibly affected by it on some internal level.

There is no one Witchcraft that is “better,” there’s only what’s best for each of us. Instead of arguing about what’s “real” let’s share some experiences and create a better Craft. Witchcraft is about what works, and it works much better when we focus on our own Craft instead of everyone else’s.

COMMENTS THAT DIDN”T MAKE THE ARTICLE

*We’ve always recited Doreen’s Valiente Charge of the Goddess with the words “beloved of gods and men” which is how we first heard it. It was later amended to read “gods and mortals,” but we we think the extra syllable throws off the Charge’s cadence. **Which at the time, was pretty much the only public Witchcraft in the UK. (Note how I wrote “public Witchcraft” and not “only Witchcraft.”) ***I’ve grown quite fond of Cochrane over the last few years and some of his ritual innovations show up in my own rites from time to time. The end of his life is an utter tragedy, and it’s possible that Modern Witchcraft might be very different today had history proceeded a bit differently.

NOTES 1. Taken from Ronald Hutton’s Triumph of the Moon, Oxford University Press, 1999 pages 298-299. I’ve quoted this book so many times in my life that I don’t even have to check the title page for the publisher and year. 2. The quote is from Valiente’s Rebirth of Witchcraft (Phoenix Publishing, 1989), but I looked it up in Philip Heselton’s Doreen Valiente: Witch, published by the Doreen Valiente Foundation in 2016. It actually just came out this past February. Page 135. 3. More Hutton, this time from page 317. Stay in touch! Like Patheos Pagan on Facebook:

About Jason Mankey

Jason Mankey has been involved with Paganism for the last twenty years, and has spent the last ten of those years as a speaker, writer, and High Priest. Jason can often be found lecturing on the Pagan Festival circuit, so you might just bump into him. When not reading and researching Pagan history he likes to crank up the Led Zeppelin, do rituals in honor of Jim Morrison (of The Doors), and sing numerous praises to Pan, Dionysus, and Aphrodite. He lives in Sunnyvale CA with his wife Ari and two hyper-kinetic cats.

Reposted by, PHYNXRIZNG

[cstesttaken]

The man in the social media mirror: what's the truth about my online persona?

s a general rule, you can make lots of assumptions about people from their social media feed. If they’re always changing their profile pic, they’re obviously unstable. If they’re ranting about relationships, they’re high maintenance. Moaning about politics: too self-involved. Reposting old jokes/claiming nicked ones as their own: annoying/untrustworthy. Humblebragging: esteem issues, possibly insane.

But then you pause for a second as a chill wind blows right through you. “Hang on”, you think, “what if everyone else is as sharp and astute with their judgments as I am? What if they all think I’m an idiot?” 

God, if only you could ask a group of impartial observers to study your social feeds and make a quick diagnosis (more on which very, very shortly). 

I’m not normally like this, by the way. I wasn’t always so needy. But since becoming fairly active on social media I’ve found myself putting more and more stock in how I’m coming across. My poor wife has been forced to endure an endless barrage of paranoia. “Am I annoying people?” “Do you think I seem too full of myself?” “I’m not humblebragging, am I?” “Do you think my friends are starting to secretly hate me?” “Are there too many pictures of me having fun?”

It’s not the sexiest look in the world. And it’s an unusual one too because, at 40, I’m from a generation that existed perfectly healthily without social media. We spent our formative years relying on quaint, analogue things like “meeting up” or “naturally losing touch with each other”. But now the landscape has shifted, and my virtual friendship circle is an ever-growing blob made up of people I used to know (then had often stopped knowing), people I met once and got on with, people I worked with, people I grew up with, people I snogged, and people I bonded with more recently in life. Like any normal person, I’ve changed quite a lot in the time that it's taken for that collection of acquaintances to form. I’m not the same guy I was ten, twenty, in some cases, thirty years ago. I may even be a different man to the one I was last week. 

For an average Joe like me, this presents a bit of an obstacle, because it means that all of your “friends”, cohorts and followers pass you through a variety of different filters. In my case, some will remember me as young, loud and obnoxious; some as young, wasteful and unfocused; some as old, lost, and bamboozled; some as hairy, anxious, and unemployed. Some won’t remember me at all and some may even have muted my feed to shut me the hell up (and who’d blame them?).

Watch | Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg - by numbers

o it’s weird. It’s weird to have all these people in one place, and it’s easy to become tangled up in the strange version of yourself that you’ve created as your “online presence”. It feels almost duplicitous – which is why I came up with a plan to silence all the doubting monkeys in my mind. First I'd talk to an expert, then I'd play guinnea pig in my own sick investigation by getting honest answers about my social media persona from people with no vested interest in me – ie. actual strangers. Terrifying.

STAGE ONE: Talking to an expert

The expert in question was Dr Gary Wood, a social psychologist. I had lots of insane-sounding questions to ask him – almost all of them incredibly self-involved, and concerned with why it has become so important to us to receive online approval for these weird, slightly bogus, versions of ourselves. 

“We all care what the world thinks of us, otherwise who are these channels intended for?” he reasons. “And as social animals, lots of the ways we describe ourselves are meaningless unless viewed in terms of other people.”

This made lots of sense to me – after all, you don’t buy a cool pair of trainers and only wear them around the house, you need the world to see them, to validate how hip your footwear decisions are. Else what’s the point? 

“It also helps to remind ourselves that social media is about being sociable, and it works best when our aim is to make connections, rather than living our lives like an open-wound. Too much self-disclosure is often not healthy or recommended."

Instantly, my mind trawls through the recent tweets I've written. Was I over disclosing? Onto Stage Two to find out ...

recreate your holiday by wandering into Greggs wearing swimming trunks, pointing at a sausage roll, shouting TWO and paying with a £50 note

— Joshua Burt (@joshburt76) September 2, 2014

STAGE TWO: Showing my feeds to people

For this stage, my plan was to ask strangers online to look at my social feeds and to tell me the kind of person they think I am, based on what they find. I soon encountered a problem: everyone on social media is only a few degrees of separation away. So the “strangers” ended up being a mixture of friends of friends, or colleagues of friends. Still, at least they knew nothing about me.

I gave them the links to my Twitter feed (where I mostly make bad jokes, and self-promote), to my Facebook page (almost entirely self-promotion) and to my Instagram Account (where I post pictures of records, interspersed with endless images of my 2-year-old son – yes I’m afraid I’m that guy). 

I was hoping they might say something along the lines of “funny” or “nice”. And if they wanted to throw a “handsome” in there, that’s totally their choice, I wouldn’t bat it back. For the record, no one did.

What they said

“You’re a fairly new dad, and very VERY proud about that!”

“You’re so London, it hurts.”

“You look like you might be a bit snobby about music”

“Work is life, life is work – you enjoy what you do” 

“I’d like to be your FB friend but wouldn’t be bothered about Twitter”

“You’re a proper hipster dad”

 “I reckon you’re the funny one in the group”

“You’re the kind of guy who looks like he smokes loads of weed, but doesn’t.”  

“On Twitter your bio is ‘words is my tools', which is a good way of saying 'I'm a writer but don't take myself too seriously, or 'I want you to believe that I don't take myself too seriously'.”

My deductions

ll in all, it made for surprisingly nice reading. My low online-esteem had me holding my breath, ready to be taken apart and brutalized like a ragdoll in a gorilla enclosure – but no one was particularly mean about me (and they had every opportunity to be). Interestingly, there was a real sense that we all present an online image of ourselves that may not be completely authentic – more the version of us that we want the world to see – and that that’s okay. Perhaps we all know that we’re lying to one another. At least it's an open dishonesty.

In fact, in many ways, their deductions were probably a better reflection of me in real life than my actual posts are, because they were able to see beneath the veneer, and to give a reasoned, objective insight into the man behind the social media mirror. I am a hipster dad, I do wear spectacles, I am a music snob, I do love my work, I do come across like a weed smoker despite not having puffed on a joint for the best part of ten years.

Ultimately, it probably is impossible to dupe people into accepting what you want them to see as the truth. Which is either good news or a great tragedy, depending on how you look at it.

Source

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/thinking-man/man-social-media-mirror-truth-online-persona/