#god I am going to be so so professional about this 🙃

[e-6000]

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[sha-biest]

SHA's Golden Future DTIYS [Art & Writing]

Close ups of Mikey

About 10 days ago I had the idea to host a DTIYS and even though I told myself it wouldn't happen anytime soon.. the idea struck and it wouldn't let me go. SO, here it is! One thing before everything else:

1st place: One handmade custom plushie made by me

More information about this DTIYS down below

I am aware that this is a rather challenging DTIYS but it was done so intentionally by me. (Trust me, I tortured myself too 🙃) HOWEVER. you are allowed to chose to draw only one segment of the whole piece and not every single one! You will however get more points for including all 3 parts of it. I will judge the pieces based on: • How many segments of the whole piece were drawn • Creativity (in what way was it changed from the original to emphasize your own style for example) • Colors (did you chose to use colors or is it black and white?) • Hands. I do accept written entries for this as well! I love reading and I don't want to exclude writers for this one should they decide they want to tackle this! You are allowed to use my art up top of the DTIYS to promote your writing!

If you want to participate be sure to @sha-biest and use the tag #GoldenFutureDTIYS Additionaly, let me know what YOU would like to get as a plushie! (don't worry, you don't have to stick to that decision should it change over the course of the DTIYS)

Deadline: 10th March 2025

More Info: • #GoldenFutureAU art tag • Written Story by Co-Creator @rosesofenvy (More about Mikey's mindscape and him unlocking his full mystic powers can be read in "Keep You Safe" especially within Chapter 4 and Chapter 8) • The Sun God's appearance here and here References:

Mikey's mindscape in Golden Future:

In the beginning he thought it was black water but it's actually black sand

He can dive into the sand and uncover "treasures" (parts of his mystic energy)

Diving down means no vision, sound or air gets through to him

He can uncover the mystic powers by pulling them up with his chains

Uncovering a "treasure" will turn that part of the desert golden

Disclaimer: • The plushie that can be won cannot be used to be reproduced and/or sold • The size of the plushie depends on the character chosen by the winner and by the package size I can send • I am by no means a professional plush maker so I do have the right to decline a character should I not be able to turn it into a plushie • Changes might need to be made to the chosen character for the plushie for more complicated details (I will provide sketches of possible versions) • Minors are permitted to participate, but only with the express permission of a guardian and limited correspondence if they win • You can chose to get a full illustration piece instead of a plushie should you win! (if you are too uncomfortable sharing your adress for example)

Plushie examples:

Questions can be send in via my ask box! I will try to compile them in here or give them a dtiyas specific tag! I'm curious what you guys come up with and most of all.. have fun! :D

PS: I will consider doing two first places (one for writing and one for art) depending on how many entries there are

[its-time-to-write]

chapter 7

y’all I am SO SORRY this is so late. I’ve been caught up with end-of-year stuff at work and planning for next year. but I’m posting the last two chapters now🙃

I’m not sure how active I’ll be moving forward lol, 2025 is shaping up to be a pretty big year for me, professionally speaking, and that either means I’ll have more free time or less. Idk. But thank you for supporting my writing!!! You guys make me happy🩵🩵🩵

table of contents

found god at your ex’s house

To be entirely honest, the longest and only conversation you’ve ever had with goddamn Keeley Jones was at the Prada show right before you found out about Bean’s existence. 

You’d prefer to keep it that way but fucking Madeline is friends with her so now you’re headed to a stupid, awful, horrible girls’ night at her house and you’d rather fucking die.

Okay, maybe that’s a little dramatic. But your experiences concerning Keeley have been unpleasant at best. 

She first caught your notice in a tabloid on a yacht with Jamie and a screaming headline to match your screaming mind. It was two weeks after Jamie came over for the last time and apparently not enough time to get over him.

You’d gone straight to Madeline’s to scream into a pillow.

Then she was in your instagram, and when you had blocked her she appeared in fan edits and fucking WAG accounts. Then she was at the Prada show and in magazines and on the telly. It felt like no matter how much you tried to shut her out, Keeley fucking Jones remained as a painful reminder.

It wasn’t her fault per se, but you hated the role she played in Jamie’s deterioration. 

And now Madeline is fucking friends with her.

“What the actual hell, Madeline,” you groan. “Keeley fucking Jones? Are you serious? She’s the fucking worst. AND she’s not to be trusted! The girl hardly has two braincells to rub together.”

Madeline rolls her eyes. “I understand that you hate her. But she’s kind and sweet and actually a bit brilliant. I’m not going to tell her about you or Bean, but she’s not some vile, boyfriend-stealing bitch.”

“I’m not saying that,” you reply as you try to get Clare to burp. “I’m just saying that the girl could stand to grow up a little.”

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. She has. I think you’d like her.”

“Fuck off,” you scoff right as Clare burps. “See? Clare agrees.”

Madeline shrugs. “Clare is three months old. She doesn’t get a vote.”

You wrinkle your nose and say, “You mean unless she agrees with you, right?” and Madeline smiles her most angelic smile. 

“All I’m saying is you’re more than welcome to come with me tonight.”

“I’d rather die,” you inform her.

—

Jamie has the day off. They won against Aston Villa on Sunday so he’s supposed to be resting, but he’s never been very good at that.

So he does what any self-respecting person would do and goes to his ex’s house.

He forgets Roy fucking Kent is going to be there until the man himself has opened the door but Jamie musters up some arrogance and breezes right by him. Keeley knows he’s coming anyway, so he’s not going to be harassed by some grumpy old twat.

Roy must be sick or something because he doesn’t say anything. If Jamie weren’t so consumed with his own worries he might actually be concerned.

But he’s not so he sits on Keeley’s couch like he belongs there and lets her hand him a cup of tea before she sits down next to him.

Roy isn’t far off, pretending to read a book but Jamie is abso-fucking-lutely positive he hasn’t turned a single page yet.

But absolutely FUCK it because he needs Keeley’s professional, girl opinion.

“I’ve got a kid,” he says, and both Keeley and Roy do absolutely horrible jobs at pretending they’re shocked.

“Fuck off, how the fuck did you know?” he protests. “Was it Ted?”

Roy and Keeley exchange a Look and it just makes Jamie madder.

“Technically it was Coach Beard,” Keeley says in a mousy voice. “We figured you’d tell us when you were ready, Jamie.”

That’s just confusing. “How the fuck did Beard know?” he asks.

“Kid looks just fucking like you,” Roy says and that makes Jamie mad too because when the fuck did Roy see Clare?

“I saw them on the green when I was with Phoebe,” Roy clarifies and Jamie takes a minute to file that away as Roy Kent’s first-ever non-swearing sentence.

He says, “fucking hell,” because really, fucking hell. He went from not knowing he had a baby to knowing to apparently the whole Richmond coaching staff knowing (and apparently meeting) her.

Keeley asks, “Is that why you’re here, babes?” and her gentle voice actually makes him want to fucking cry so he just nods and puts his head in his hands.

“Don’t know shit about being a dad,” he says, voice muffled, and Roy slams his book shut because apparently he has shit to say.

“Fuck off, Tartt,” he says. “Stop being a little bitch.”

Keeley exclaims, “Roy!” but she’s also curious about what he has to say because she doesn’t do anything else to stop him.

“I fucking mean it,” he continues. “You fucking come here expecting to fucking cry on the couch and be told you’re fucking shit at something and throw a fucking pity party, so fuck off. You might be a shit father, you don’t fucking know, but that girl doesn’t fucking think so and if I were her, I’d hate your fucking guts. So untwist your fucking pants and stop being a fucking whiny little bitch. Go fucking be a dad and if you’re shit, you’re shit. But stop looking for fucking sympathy for something you’ve made up in your stupid fucking twat brain.”

With that he pushes himself out of his chair, swears at his knee, and disappears into the kitchen, presumably to remain silent for the next year since he’s met his word quota.

Jamie looks at Keeley as if to say, Are you hearing this prick? but Keeley just lifts a shoulder and says, “He’s right, babe. You’ve got to actually go do something about it.”

So Jamie pinches the bridge of his nose and recounts everything his mum told him over the phone for some extra review.

—

Clare is easy, as far as babies go, but for some reason tonight she’s decided to be an absolute terror. She won’t eat, won’t go to sleep, won’t calm down. She just cries and cries and no matter how many times you check her temperature or her diaper, she cannot get it back together.

It doesn’t help that you’re tired, either. Like, newborn-level tired. And hungry, too. You’d order in but Clare hasn’t even allowed that so you open the fridge as best you can while bouncing Clare up and down. All you can see is a jar of gherkins, a can of soda, and some lemons. 

And a fucking banana which must be Madeline’s because you’d rather die of starvation than eat that shit.

Fucking hell.

I am not going to cry you tell yourself sternly, except that doesn’t do anything except allow tears to well up faster than if you’d just let it alone.

You can’t call Madeline because she’s at Keeley’s and you’ll be damned if you interrupt her girls’ night. Madeline didn’t sign up to be tied down and she deserves a non-parent friend, so she’s not an option.

For a split second, you debate calling Jamie. But that’s a level of desperation you haven’t quite reached. You close the fridge and are saved from deciding what to do next by a knock on the door.

Clare wails like she’s being murdered, so you hope it isn’t the police but it isn’t, it’s just Jamie with a bag of groceries. He’s in the house setting up in the kitchen before your brain catches up with your eyes and Clare just cries the whole time. 

You know exactly what he’s making before he’s even pulled out half the ingredients. It’s chicken pesto risotto, the dish you always begged him to make whenever he had a moment of free time. Jamie can cook maybe four things in total, but damn he can cook them well. He slices some bread, puts it on a plate with some butter and hands it to you, swapping the plate for Clare so easily that if you didn’t know better you’d think he’s been doing it his whole life. She stops crying the moment she’s in his arms and honestly, you’re too tired to worry about it. You crash on the couch and fall asleep after two bites.

It’s dark out when you wake up, but the lights are on in the house and it’s warm. Someone’s gently caressing the top of your head and saying your name, so you open your eyes to Jamie standing over you.

He’s looking at you with a soft expression, and your heart aches. It all feels too painfully normal.

He says, “Food’s ready,” and holds out a hand for you to grab.

You hesitate for the barest fraction of a moment before taking it. “Little Bean’s asleep in her bed,” he continues. “You hungry? Figured we could eat then you can go back to sleep.”

You nod. “Smells good, J. Are you planning on spending the night, then?”

Jamie shrugs. “I thought- I don’t know, I thought maybe you could use a break.”

He sits next to you at the table. The food’s been set out, and it’s still warm. It’s also the first meal you haven’t been responsible for in a good long while.

“So you’re just here now,” you say. “You’re the kind of person who shows up, cooks dinner, puts the baby to bed and watches telly in the evenings? You could barely handle a relationship, and now you want a fucking family? You can leave me all you want, but I swear to God, Jamie, I will murder you if you hurt Clare.”

It’s frustrating because it feels like you’re at an impasse. Jamie can come back once he’s shown he’s changed, but he can’t really show he’s changed if he can’t fucking come back, can he?

It doesn’t matter that he probably has changed and you know deep down that even he isn’t a big enough dick to abandon his daughter.

Jamie says, “I am. I mean, I won’t. I mean, fucking hell, you don’t have to fucking murder me, yeah? Just give me a chance, like.”

You snort. “Do you even know how to change a diaper?”

Jamie says, “Googled it, didn’t I?” and that makes you genuinely laugh. Of course he did. But you laugh too loud and it wakes up Clare, who lets you know she’s irritated with a shriek. You knock your head lightly against the table and whisper, “Fuck,” before putting down your fork. You push your chair out and Jamie stands, lightning-fast.

“I got it,” he tells you, and you raise an eyebrow.

You reply, “Okay,” because if he’s going to act like a father, he’s going to have to put in the work. And you’re hungry and this is your favorite meal. Besides, what’s the worst that’s going to happen?

So Jamie goes to Clare’s room where she’s sobbing like there’s no tomorrow and you continue to eat while straining your ears to make sure Jamie isn’t panicking.

Unfortunately, you didn’t account for the fact that the worst thing that could happen is Jamie comes back out after ten minutes with a sleeping Clare on his chest and he looks so fucking hot that you want to jump his bones then and there. 

Jamie is thankfully oblivious. He sits back down and pats Clare on the back so she doesn’t wake up again.

“How’s the food?” he whispers. “Haven’t cooked in fuckin’ ages.”

“Good,” you whisper back and then you lapse into silence. 

 “I can stay the night, if you want,” Jamie offers after a bit, and you glare.

“Not like that,” he hastily amends, “I mean if you want to sleep. I can feed Clare and whatever.”

You sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose. “Jamie. What the fuck do you want from me? You can’t fucking come back here and play house when you want, and I get it, your dad’s a piece of shit and you don’t want to be like him. But you’re in the fucking Prem, Jamie.”

(“Got relegated,”) he mouths, but you just keep talking. “Fine. You’re in the Championship but everyone knows you at least are making it back to the Premier League and someday you’ll be with a team in the Champion’s League and that’s a lot of travel. It’s a lot of nights alone, and you’re not exactly the kind of person who likes sleeping alone.

Jamie looks offended at that, but it’s true. He’s twenty-six and in his prime.

This whole thing is just one giant circle with no solution. 

“Oi,” he says, and he’s got his serious expression on. “I don’t want anything from you. I want you. Not even because of Clare, but she’s mint. I was coming to find you the other night because I wanted to fix things. I told you that. I meant it, I want to get back together. I know I’m hard to love sometimes but swear down, I want to make it work. Keeley’s on me about commitment and shit and I dunno, it sounds nice. I’m fucking tired of fucking around. That shit’s exhausting.”

“Yeah, because a baby and a girlfriend isn’t fucking exhausting as well.”

Jamie wrinkles his nose. “Fucking Garnacho’s having a kid. If that little shit can handle it, I can too.”

You concede. He has a point. “Fine. You can spend the night. I’m going to shower and then pass out, which means you’ve got the dishes and Clare. You can sleep in the guest room, yeah? I’ll set up the baby monitor.”

Jamie smiles, and before you can really think it through, you lean over to kiss his cheek.

“Thank you,” you say softly before heading upstairs. You’re going to get an earful from Madeline later, but for now you’re going to get good sleep for the first night in a long while.

next chapter

[semperreformanda]

life update

last june my boss let me go for “not being a good fit”

it didn’t take me long to put two and two together and realize that the big reason was because of my pregnancy. and the biggest support to this theory was he talked negatively about a coworker (who was in the company for 6+ years) who got pregnant, saying stuff like “I don’t want her back … I already know how it goes when employees get pregnant, they’ll start calling out … I don’t want to deal with that” he would say all that stuff to me and others behind her back so I knew I was only gonna stick around to save some $$$ and use the insurance as much as I could

(oh and she was forced to resign bc they literally did not want her there anymore 🙃)

but when it finally happened it drove me in anxiety and anger because I had relied on the insurance especially bc I AM PREGNANT

yes it is illegal yes I should have reported it but I had no energy to do anything

but God reminded me through it all that He provides and He does! and so silly of me to think He could provide for my greatest need (my salvation through Christ) but not provide for our little earthly needs

another reason I was annoyed was I was already planning to quit but they beat me to it 😂 but that was honestly the worst company I’ve ever worked for. I could not deal with the constant disrespect and the yelling and the cussing and their questionable ethics

they stole an engineer’s professional seal and stamp it on their projects WITHOUT HIS APPROVAL meaning all projects are “approved” 🥴 this was the last straw for me bc imagine all the hazards

anyways… that was almost 3 months ago and I honestly feel so relieved to not be working there anymore. I spent too many times feeling so incredibly stressed out and then even more stressed out that I may be hurting the baby from it

speaking of… I am already 27 weeks pregnant today 😭 I remember when I first saw that faint line and thought I was hallucinating things. we tried for months only with a stark white test every month, so seeing a shadow of a line sent chills down my spine. and 27 weeks later my little bubba has gotten so big and active 😭 I love him so much

like it’s so crazy how he’s so close to me but also so far it’s like a long distance relationship 🥴💀

also learned a lot about gestational diabetes bc my hypochondriac brain was convinced I HAD IT

apparently it’s not due to your diet and you can’t even cause it. shocking how this is not widespread knowledge, because so many moms feel guilty for failing their baby when they’re diagnosed but in reality it is mostly your placenta being a jerk 😭

so for the past few days when I got the call that I failed my 1 hour I acted like I had gestational diabetes 😭 became very picky with what I ate, which is hard bc my culture loves rice 😭 and I took 10 min walks after meals

all I could think about was my blood sugars spiking and how I needed to bring it down 💀

also I had to fast for at least 8 hours before I could do my 3 hour glucose test which was honestly so hard bc if you’ve been pregnant you know the pregnancy hunger pangs!!! I cried after my test because I was anxious about having GD and also I felt so bad for my baby 😭😭 like I starved him 😂 even though I know he’s fine in there because placenta n all dat

anyways I just wanted to let you guys in on that bc why not and also I’m bored and drinking chai while my husband works besides me 🙂🤠

[lalalaugenbrot]

15 questions + 15 friends tagged by @nougatbit

1. Are you named after anyone?

i don't think so but as far as i can retrace my name it's greek, somehow ended up in russia and then was made popular outside of russia via doctor zhivago's lara/larissa... (still have to read that!)

2. When was the last time you cried?

I cried from an allergy i have to certain skin cremes last night at the cinema... apart from that i don't remember atm but certainly not long ago

3. Do you have kids?

nope

4. What sports do you play/ have you played?

i did swimming when i was like 14 (i still like swimming a lot but i'm not in a club or anything anymore)

5. Do you use sarcasm?

no :-)

6. What is the first thing you notice about people?

this has always been a weird question to me... their??? face?!?!! (*laughs nervously* wouldn't that always be the first thing to notice about someone???)

7. What's your eye color?

blue

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

a weird opposition. i don't really like horror movies and i prefer the ending a story needs and deserves, so some stories (e.g. a story on two traumatised young men who love and need each other more than anything or anyone else in the world in a mediocre prime time crime show) certainly deserve a happy end, other stories (e.g. a film that displays some severe social grievances) often should not have a happy ending because there isn't one to be expected in reality either... except for sometimes, for example, when it is about two queer men in 1913 Britain, finding and loving each other against all odds and all social norms, written by a gay man in the same era, then of course a happy ending can be imperative even :-)

9. Any talents?

people don't tire to tell me how ~creative i am... and that despite my apparent total lack of (visual, auditory, sensory) imagination 🙃 so there's that

other than that... i think i am good with words and i write since i literally can write and nothing brings me more joy than having written.. writing has been like the most important thing in my life for 26 years now even though it has always been something that happens more like 'in the background' of everything else

10. Where were you born?

in one of the (imo) most village-like "Großstädte" of Germany... if i told you where you'd probably know it because of one specific thing... i've been all the way to other continents and people knew it just because of that

11. What are your hobbies?

most hobbylike things are probably analogue photography, building stuff around the house (shelves etc.) and going to the cinema (or like film in general)

12. Do you have any pets?

no, but i had mice and i miss them... if i had more time and more space to have an adequate place to keep them i'd like to have mice or rats again...

13. How tall are you?

1,73

14. Favorite subject in school?

hm. not sports. i had a 'compulsory optional course' in physics/informatics and i always say it changed my life bc that's where i understood that i like and am good at technical and computer stuff... i also liked pedagogy (nrw superiority), the obligatory history course in 12th grade specifically and in the last years also maths... god do i miss solving math problems 😭😭

15. Dream job?

i wrote this in my friends journal when i was like 10 and it is still true but i think i am a bit past the point where this will ever happen but it's 'director ' (of films)... but that involves networking and other people and putting yourself out there... and uh... i just don't see that happening (i have directed but not in the slightest professionally), the other one of course has always been 'author' and i guess that could still happen... someday in the future maybe... you know, when I'm a grown-up

tagging: @diersten @tiny-steve @sinnsenke @mcfif @black-cat-aoife @silverysnake @free-piza @lachricola

[remtrack]

ik it’s so embarrassing 💔💔 i remember that week being not the best so maybe i was just emotional in general ?? idek 😭. i also cry over fluff more than angst. i read angst when i’m like at a rly low point bc it’s almost kinda comforting ……. idk dw bae i sound insane rn too ! we pretty much have the same favorite cereal bc if i had to choose i’d get the chocolate rice crispy ones (or honey nut cheerios) and i LOVEEEE milo. my nana from australia always sends it over and it’s delishhhh. so nostalgic. YES spanakopita is life, it is so so so so good. lmk what you and your mom end up getting ^_^ that sounds so fun i love eating w ppl

ITS THE HYUNE BODY ROLLING SO TRUE. i like when he dances with short sleeves or sleeveless tops bc the arm muscles just make me 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 insane !!! i’ve been wanting to watch a new movie so maybe i’ll watch howl now ^_^ i’ve heard a TON about it and i think you just fully convinced me hehe. do you have any other movie or show recs ?? i’m not a big movie or show person but im tryingggg to watch more stuff so tell me any of your faves

oh yea i could slander america as a professional job. like don’t get me wrong i’m extremely grateful to live somewhere where i can get a good education and just like survive but at the same time … i’m barely surviving ?? all our money goes to stuff that doesn’t even benefit us ??? idk man i’ll keep going if i don’t stop myself BUT YES PLS all the mcflurries 🙏🏼. possible unpopular opinion but oreo mcflurry dipped in fries = chefs kiss. it’s an underrated combo fr

i would pay MONEYYYY to experience one skz dance practice but hyunjins alone oh my oh my oh myyyyy. i don’t think i’d survive, his clinging would be ineffective bc i’d just be 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠. smth about the way he dances just GAHHH. YES CONFIDENT MISCHIEVOUS LITTLE YONGBOK he’s so cute 😭😭😭😭 i love his korean name it’s adorable

i watched the live when i woke up this am and it was the cutest thing ever <///3. felix looked so bf and i swear the There music video made it WORSEE. the parasocial vibes rly smacked me in the face and said grace u need to wake up and accept you can’t have these men 😔

spamming once again gahhhh can u tell i’m bored <///3. im stuck inside for another day bc nyc is having a rly bad snow storm rn and it’s torturous lol. as much as i love being in my bed all day, it gives me a raging headache every timeeeee

- 🐈‍⬛ kisses 4 uuuuu i hope ur sleeping well ^_^

i've never tried honey nut cheerios but now i kinda want to?? lets see lets see. going back to my campus this saturday so i gotta stock up on my food stock 🫡 i'm gonna try honey nut cheerios hehe. milo is good but i can't drink it that much bcs its best mixed with milk and im lactose intolerant </3 i mean i do consume dairy anyway but milo and milk is a deadly combination. one sip and you're gonna end up with diarrhea. even worse when u have lactose intolerance. god lactose intolerance sucks so bad, especially when i love dairy </3 life is a war game and the toilet is my battle field. </3 aaa me and mumsies ended up not getting breakfast bcs we didnt wake up on time LOLL love that 4 us 🤞

sleeveless tops on hyune always look so good. his arms are so nice, the type that isn't frail nor too muscular, he's just nice. dont get me started on his hands yo his hands are pretty big too and his fingers?? majestic. slender and pretty. makes me dizzy just watching it 😵‍💫howl is incredibly good, u reaaaaaally need to watch it <3!! mmm for tv shows, i really like gilmore girls and jujutsu kaisen. or if you like romance, u shud try out horimiya!!

I UNDERSTAND ABT THE MONEY THING... malaysian road taxes r no joke. youngsters going broke frm paying taxes is CRAAAZY. fries dipped in vanilla ice cream is so good so i get u!!!!! it's the mixture of sweet and salty 🤌

when hyunjin does a lil smirk while dancing... im frothing drooling melting. like bae stop i will get through this phone screen and kiss u 😭 so pretty. YONGBOK IS SO CUTE AND YES HIS NAME!! I LOVE WRITING HIM AS YONGBOK BCS I LOVE HIS NAME SM... i also love jeongin's name. it's cute and suiting for him.

the live c hdbhs i was fixated on seungmin the whole time... was just staring at him dreamily like... 💭 he made a mess but i's ok bcs it's seungmo!!

THE THERE MV OH MY GOD GRACEEEEEE. I'LL NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT IT. HYUNJIN AND SEUNGMIN'S PART GOT ME GIGGLING!!1 also can i just say that the settings suit them so much? it feels like it's actually their ideal date. jeongin with the shopping for clothes, hyunjin with the camera and channie in the studio... it makes so much sense. omg what if it IS their ideal date? bye im gonna combust. why are they parasocializing with us!! its making the delusions worse!!!

talking abt parasocializing, felix needs to calm down. bro was wiping at his mouth and stuff r u indicating that we just made out?!?! not very pg13 of him. i heard he spams om bubble too 😭 he needs to find a gf his bitchless behavior is getting worse 😟

ur spam is always entertaining so dw!! i take my time with it always cs i wanna put thought in my words hehe. sorry to hear abt the storm :(( i hope ure staying warm <3

[millenialfanfictionaddiction]

Polyship with Daichi and Suga

Sawamura Daichi x Sugawara Koshi x GN! reader

Warnings: none!

A/N: This is the request from @alreadyinsane! This is also the final request from the pride series!

🏳️‍🌈 Please Like, Share, Comment to support my writing 🏳️‍🌈

Ahh the daisugayn ship is finally coming

I've been waiting for this one 🥰

Mostly because I love writing for Daichi and Suga

Suga is like the opposite of Daichi but they work so well together

And imagine add YN 🤚🏻 oh boy

Ok so I see this as one of the few polyships that you could get away with in secret

Like Daichi and Suga don't feel the need to brag about their relationship to others

Unless 👀 they are jealous

Which THANK GOD there isn't a super dramatic person writing these headcannons 😃

So we are going to do these a little different than we normally do

You, Daichi and Suga have already been together for a while now

And nobody knows

Because you all act normal around each other

I mean, Daichi and Suga argue like a married couple constantly, thats no different in private

"I just don't see why you don't put more trust in me"- Suga

"😐🙄 Literally you are the leader of them!"- Daichi

"I'll have you know I'm a GREAT upperclassmen"- Suga says

"You literally make fun of the other teams more than Tanaka and Noya"- You add

"YN WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON"- Suga, offended

Please that's literally your life YN 🤣

You guys walk home together, at together and somehow manage to keep things somewhat stable at Karasuno

Your relationship doesn't really get in the way much because we just know Daichi and Suga are professionals

Until they aren't...

Because one thing can be said about Suga and Daichi 👀

They can be petty af 💅🏼

And their true pettiness comes to shine when they go to summer training camp

Now Daichi and Suga are level headed

But when it comes to Kuroo and Akasshi 😬

They most definitely are not 🙃

"YN it's so good to see you again! When are you going to transfer to Nekoma?"- Kuroo says smirking

Daichi 👉🏻😐😑

"Oh YN! How good to see you again. I'm looking forward to seeing you around camp" Akaashi says waving at you

Suga 👉🏻😐🙄

You smile and wave at the boys as you go about your business getting the teams gear together

Suga and Daichi are brooding in the corner

"Can you believe Kuroo? Like YN would ever go to Nekoma!"- Daichi says

"Akaashi can stop the nice guy crap anytime"- Suga adds

You are completely clueless to your partners frustration

But never fear YN, there is more awkwardness to come 🙌🏻

We all know the training camp for Karasuno doesn't go the best 😬

And it only gets worse the more Kuroo and Akaashi push Daichi and Suga

While our precious angels are running up the hill, Kuroo comes and asks you if you can help the third gym squad later

Suga and Daichi reach the summit, see Kuroo and INSTANTLY run back down the hill 😅

Daichi and Suga pull up behind you as your talking to Kuroo

"Oh hey! Kuroo was just asking me if I could help with their practice later-"

Please you don't even get the final words our before you see Daichi and Suga glaring at Kuroo

Akaashi walks up and asks Kuroo is he asked you to join them

"Well YN what do you say?"- Kuroo asks

"I'd love to-"

"YN is helping US with our synchronized attacks!"- Daichi interrupts

You 👉🏻👀 I am?

"Yeah we need YN more than you do!"- Suga says putting his arm around you

Please they are both so possessive 😅

"Come on YN, let's go"- Daichi says grabbing your arm and pulling you away

Suga walks backwards, literally making this gesture at Akaashi and Kuroo 👇🏻

Kuroo just smirks and Akaashi watches you be dragged away

"Will you two stop being so weird!"- you say

"YN they are doing it on purpose!"- Daichi adds

"How? They literally have no clue we are dating"- you say to Suga and Daichi

"Well still. They know it bothers us when they talk to you like that"- suga

You 👉🏻😐🙄 omg

"Listen, you two are so important to me and I care about you. I wouldn't be dating you if I didn't. So stop this weird possessive caveman act please?"-you

"We will stop when they stop hitting on you!"- Suga adds

You 👉🏻😐 I can never have nice things

If that statement isn't hard facts 😅

Because what's about to happen next will shock not only the whole camp but you as well

Because Kuroo isn't going to give up easily and let's just say, Akaashi isn't one to be deterred either

At the end of the days practice matches, Kuroo manages to catch you alone without your entourage

"Hey Yn"- he says

You look up, smiling amd returning the greeting

"I was wondering if you'd be able to help toss for Akaashi so Bokuto and I could work on our spikes and blocks"- he asks

"Umm well I'm about to help Karasuno with their-" you start to say when it all breaks down

"WHAT DID I SAY KUROO?"- Daichi says losing his ever loving mind

He snatches you away, holding you close

Akaashi approaches

"Kuroo was just asking YN for help"- he says

Ope 👀

"You two have been all over our YN and it stops here!"- Suba says coming up besides you

Kuroo and Akasshi 👉🏻🤨 you're YN???

"That's right! YN is dating me AND Suga"- Daichi shouts

The entire gym 👉🏻 *silence*

Kuroo and Akaashi 👉🏻😳😲

Tanaka and Noya 👉🏻👁👄👁 huh??

Nekoma 👉🏻👀😶

Asahi and Ennoshita 👉🏻🤨🤨

Kiyoko 👉🏻 I knew it 🙄

You 👉🏻😃 well this is awkward

"So back off of YN before you feel our wrath!"- Suga adds

"Suga why did you say that. Now it sounds weird"- Daichi adds

"What it's a warning!"- Suga says

"Is it really tho?? It's not like you are that scary Koshi"- you say

Suga 👉🏻😐 betrayed by my own partners

You just smile and look to Kuroo and Akasshi

"I'd love to help you but unfortunately I can't tonight. Maybe tomorrow?"- you say

Kuroo and Akaashi 👉🏻👁👄👁 sure

Daichi and Suga look so smug as they both hold your hand and turn to walk away

"I'm not dramatic YN"- Daichi

"You two really need to learn to be less dramatic"- you

Am I the drama??

"You literally just outted us in front of the entire training camp"- Suga

"I said what needed to be said"- Daichi says looking away

You just smile and kiss your boys on the cheek

Please YN you are so lucky 😫

[likesplatterpaint]

The Plan Today

To make an extremely long story short, we are currently in the middle of a feud/estrangement/breaking ties between Mike’s sister and their parents, after she abruptly moved out because it became intolerably toxic. We have our separate relationship with them, but let’s just acknowledge They Fucked up in a lot of ways that hurt both Mike and sister. Let’s also acknowledge that while MIL can be difficult, she fills a certain mom shaped void in my life. They have helped us financially in a lot of ways, but that doesn’t make their behavior excusable.

Came to a head again last night after I tried to extend an olive branch and invite for The Turkey day, and we may very well get the quiet thanksgiving we want because???? They may not want to see us for the first time in fucking forever. Both of us are emotionally, physically, and professionally exhausted with our jobs and grad school. Runnin on fumes yo.

So mike took yesterday off, and I took today. My kids barely needed me yesterday and I was feeling sick, so I put in at the end of the day BEFORE giant fight happened (I also ran an extremely successful one on one zoom with the executive director of our local arts council while this fight was happening thank god, but that’s a separate thing). Mike’s going to be visiting with his old boss in Baltimore until late tonight. The plan is:

Pokémon

Unsolved Mysteries

Time with Dogs

Stare at Fish

Eat whatever I want

Ignore all obligations outside of immediate animal needs and fucking take care of myself.

And tomorrow

See our best friend

See Wakanda forever

Eat delicious food

I probably should call my therapist, but really don’t know what else she could tell me beyond things we’ve already hashed and strategies and insights I know. This is all stirring up shitloads of family trauma for both of us and we react differently. Personally I feel like someone is just peeling old scars of mine open 🙃 Mike is desperately trying to get in with his, but the soonest appt she had was Dec 29th, and we’ll be driving back from Tampa then. Can we talk about how handy it is that I felt compelled to declare Florida Christmas again months ago?? How badly I just want a hug from my dad, who is ironically the best parent right now? Lmao?

I am refreshing my email like a maniac for details on Please Stab My Shoulder with Art in honor of him and celebration of me?

May November eat shit and learn that it will never break me again like it did in 2011, 2012 and 2013 🙃

[seraxfemme]

Dude I decided to get a reading for career advice and it made me cry the way she described the feeling about my most recent job. I liked waitressing but the way they do things at that place is just... It's undeserving of my level of commitment. I try my best to be fair and professional but it really felt like they were working against me not with me. 'Highly critical' is a very light way of putting it, but mostly I just hate when people are so stubborn and can't read the room, or read when the customers just don't want to do things the way they're so hell-bent on doing it if there's no consequences and the request is reasonable. Plus the language barrier made it so that I was the scapegoat for everything and I couldn't defend myself. Literally I always asked beforehand if the check would be separate but then they wanna change something on their tabs, and I get shit on for making a mistake w the tab when I didn't, they just want to change something bc it's too expensive for one person. Snobby customers go in there expecting special attention and I'm just trying to do my job and it's so annoying bc idk who they are and idk their special little fucking orders, I need them to speak to me like a person, not just say "the chef knows me" STFU. And don't even think about telling me the prices of the things that are off menu, god forbid I input the information correctly and in a timely manner when ppl call to order it and ur busy. Overall, not happy that they were allowed to forget things and make mistakes but not me 🙃. So I did quit and I am feeling horrible rn and bored and frustrated. And I do have to branch out bc someone in my situation can't be dealing with dumb bs at work and Ubers constantly canceling and making my ride be a gamble every morning. Going through that anxiety lmao I don't have mom and dad's money and house and car and whatever else to just fall back on if someone decides to fuck w me or mess up my schedule or cancel on me or whatever. They seem to think I'm just chillin so I should be able to handle a little bit of stress at work... like? No,,,I can't handle such a disorganized mess with no way of defending myself, it's just not fair. I'm crying bc I'm frustrated and feel trapped. rn I feel brain dead. And embroidery doesn't even feel good rn. I just resumed commissions and am already regretting and I immediately had to close again

[hockstuff]

my oh myyyyy boy did this make me SWOON🥰 first (haha) of all, when this popped up on my dash the first word other than the heading that i saw was “angst” and i was ready to prepare for heartache right then and there but then i actually read the a/n and summary properly and could actually breathe lmao sEE ALLISON THIS IS WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO ME NOW SAGKJFDASF 🔪

I LOVED THIS CONCEPT SO MUCH!!! the absolute pure fluff of the snippets of their first everything and just to see that progression was so damn cute i was just heart eyes the entire time!!! aND THE WRITING AND STRUCTURE? THAT’S TALENT BESTIE. like you wrote it so so so well by clearly portraying that all these instances were for the first time, the nerves and uncertainty and just aajkdhfgahfg UGH I LOVED IT SO MUCH this was so sweet and the ending!!!! THE ENDING!!!!! im gone. very much accepted that i will never know love like this and THATS FINE IM FINE 🥲🥲🥲 also yes, i am consciously avoiding talking about that part but i’ll get to that in a sec🙃 basically, i loved this a lot like a lot a lot and everyone should read it 

NOW I WASNT GOING TO PUT MY LIVE REACTIONS TO THIS BUT THERE WERE A FEW SCENES THAT I JUST COULDNT HELP MYSELF AND I NEED YOU TO KNOW MY THOUGHTS SO HERE WE GO (i tried to be picky and pick one from each section bc otherwise i’d have something to say for every damn sentence - but really this is me picking a sentence of a section just to talk about the broader part of the story ahahaha)

“My job…” Mat muttered under his breath as he leaned back on the chair, crossing his arms over his chest. Your eyes flickered down to see the slight flex of his muscles, and when you reconnected eyes with him, he smirked, “I play hockey.”

THIS WHOLE SCENE HAD ME DYING AHAHAHA THIS COCKY LIL BASTARD IS LOVING THIS AND HIS SMIRKS AND VERY MUCH MAKING A POINT NOT TO CLEAR IT UP THAT HE PLAYS PROFESSIONAL HOCKEY I CANT AHAHA and the reader trying to make conversation by trying to relate and say she has friends that play hockey on weekends - im dead that was so relatable and so awkward i loved it 

You rolled your eyes at him and pressed your palms flat against his chest as the train jolted to a start.

ok ok but the whole first kiss section was so fucking cute!! this sentence in particular i couldnt help but imagine a height difference between them so i DIED (i am 5′3-ish so this was very self indulgent and im not even mad 🥴). LIKE UGH COULD YOU JUST IMAGINE THE HAVING TO LOOKED UP AT HIM AS YOU ROLL YOUR EYES AND THEN THE WHOLE HIS ARMS AROUND YOUR WAIST AND YOUR HEAD ON HIS CHEST I WAS SO DLHJASFGFLJHAF READING THIS PART EVEN RIGHT NOW IM SMILING JUST THINKING ABOUT IT AND UGH ALLISON YOUR WRITING IS TOO GOOD!!!! also the hestitancy in their kiss and their little “i like you”s ughhhhh 😍😍

It was your first hockey game.

this whole fucking section. yes, i am highlighting the first sentence bc i cant even begin to justify which other sentence is suitable for me to talk about this. oh my fucking god. THIS WAS THE BEST THING I’VE EVER READ. from the reader finding out he plays for the islanders to the last fucking paragraph. i was loving every word of this entire damn thing i cant even express it clearly agalDFASKJDHFGA MAT TRYING NOT TO FUCKING LOSE IT WHEN HE SEES HER IN HIS JERSEY OH MY GOD I WAS LOSING IT ON BEHALF OF HIM AND THE TEASING FROM HAYDEN!!!! AND THEN THE TEASING FROM BEAU!!!!! 💀💀 OH MY THE PRAISE. THE. PRAISE. ok i had to calm my self bc that whole scene was GOLD. pure GOLD. his fucking praise kink fucking sent me i lost it over all of that like just even how you wrote it like it wasnt overdone and it was subtle enough but had such a big impact and really conveyed it and wowoowowow it was really really REALLY well written i genuinely loved it so much alhdgfalsgf OK BACK TO SCREAMING BC THE PART WHERE HAYDEN AND BEAU WERE JUST LOSING IT??? ME. I WAS THEM. THEY WERE ME. THEY KNOW WHATS UP. MAT WAS REVELLING IN THE PRASIE AND HES NOT EVEN ASHAMED AND JUST THE PURE OBLIVION OF THE READER I CANT AHAHAHA OH. OH. OH. THE LAST PARAGRAPH WOW 🥵 dont be shy bestie write a whole piece just on that 

Mat’s worn out voice from before disappeared as he now sounded on high alert.

protective!matprotective!matprotective!matprotective!matprotective!matprotective!mat was all i could think about and yOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT PROTECTIVE MAT YOU KNOW!!!!! and i quick casual “i love you” and his reaction?????? me=dead. and when the reader realised and her instinct was to clean AHAHAHAHAHA WHAT A FUCKING MOOOOOOD. but bro....... mat’s “i love you”......... bro.......... i- im so soft it hurts and the description of his eyes? wow the writing talent. ALSO!!!! “And you couldn’t wait to learn how he loved.” what in the taylor motherfucking swift kinda of sentence was that oh my god that was genuinely so beautiful i didnt know what to do with myself 🥺

“There are other people,” Mat spat out as he breathed heavily, “People who know me better. If we weren’t together, there would be other people who––”

I KNEW BETTER THAN TO UNDERESTIMATE YOUR “2% angst” BULLSHIT THIS SHIT HURT SDKJHGSG LIKE YEAH IT WAS ONE SECTION OF ANGST BUT ITS YOU. YOU ALLISON. THE PERSON WHO WRITES ANGST BETTER THAN ANYONE IVE EVER READ ANYTHING FROM🔪🔪 oh my god and when he said he couldnt be with her??? my heart damn near stopped and then she asked him back if its for now or anymore??? oh. my. god. i could phycially feel the angst and the ache and i just ughhhhh it so written so well and that is exactly WHY IT HURT SO MUCH SO THANK GOD THAT ENDED HAPPY OH MY 

You needed space to concentrate on the fact that in less than a few hours you would have a different last name.

oh my god a wedding!!!!!!!! 🥰💞💗 i was smiling and happy and thriving the entire time reading this bc wow it could not have ended any better bc like COME ON THEYRE MEANT TO BE. tito’s “are you sure i cant marry you?” sirrrrr PLS I CANT WITH HIM AHAHAHA THE TEASING FROM FRIENDS THROUGHOUT WAS GOLD AND I LOVED IT ALL!!!! the handholding. the fucking handholding. only you could make something so innocent and casual feel so intimate and full wow it was all so sweet how they were talking through the door and the fact that mat knew she was early bc HE WAS EARLY??? i did not see that coming and i loved that detail so much. AND THEN THE PHOTO IM SOFT IM SO SOFT 🥺🥺 oh and “it felt as if the rings held a promise heavier than til death do us part” was so so so so beautiful i have no more words to express how beautiful that was 

this piece was genuinely written so well and you know this bc i tell you all the time but your writing continues to amaze me! no joke, no screaming, pure truth - you write so well its insane🥰💗 now excuse me while i read this 50 more times and cry about never getting to know love like this and mentally prepare for your next fic which we know is 🔪🔪🔪🔪

A/N: Hiiii!! More writing! Yay! This was a fun one!! It’s 98% fluff with 2% angst, but I promise it has a happy ending 🙂 Thank you all so much for your encouraging words!! I cherish them all & hold them close to my heart 🥺 Any and all feedback is appreciated! I hope you enjoy !

Summary: From your first date, first kiss, first hockey game of Mat’s, first I love you, to your first fight…You always learned something new about him.

MASTERLIST | LET’S CHAT 🥂 | Mat Barzal x Reader

Warnings: One swear word & brief allusion to smut // WC: 11.6K // Fluff & Slight Angst

It was your first date.

A blind date.

The nerves got the best of you, so you arrived at the coffee shop early. What if the subway line you had to take was late? What if you missed a stop? What if you took a wrong turn down a street? Twenty minutes might be a bit too early, but it was the only way to ease your anxiety.

You don’t even know the last time you were on a blind date. Your friend, Hayden, had set it up. After a drunken confession over a shared bottle of wine, you admitted you were scared that you were running out of time to find your person. And that’s when an idea clicked in her mind.

She said she had a friend––Mat––who was tired of flings and wanted to really date someone. You waved her off, the idea of being set up seemed too middle school for you. But after she showed you a picture of him…you gave her the go ahead to send him your number.

She contacted Mat, and he said that he was all in for a blind date with you.

You tapped your foot on the pavement as you stood outside of the coffee shop entrance you agreed to meet at. After scrolling through your social media a few times, you clicked on your messages. Were you at the right coffee shop? You clicked on his name, and triple checked that you had the correct place and time.

“Uh, Y/N?”

Keep reading

[gabelandescrocs]

Date: 05122021

Book Count: 10 out of 30 (prev. 8/27)

Heres the part where I gush about the books. Its not going to be coherent (nor helpful for you if you're seeking to read these), so please excuse me while I go lowkey feral.

The Goal - Elle Kennedy

Series: Off-Campus #4

WHERE DO I FUCKING START. istg the author was on something else when writing this because this is my favorite one out of the 6 other books of theirs I've read so far.

yes, i dont read by order nor read book series back to back my brain just cant fucntion that way lol

*ahem* HEY GOD ITS ME AGAIN, SO UH.. WHEN WILL I GET MY JOHN TUCKER HUH?? I am way past asking nicely now 😤

this one was funny, sappy, steamy and heartbreaking all at once. I literally had to stop myself at 5AM last night bcs I was reading this nonstop. I had an alarm for 7AM. 🙃

tw or cw for this (look away if you dont want a few spoilers now): unexpected pregnancy, slight verbally abusive family, sexual harassment, death of a character

Hard to Hold - K. Bromberg

Series: Play Hard #2

Okay, so I think I got this from a recommendation from spicy booktok and I didnt know it was in a series until now lol

It was a good read. Its about a professional soccer star and a sports agent. Porn with slight plot(?)

You may want to pelt the main guy's head with as many soccer balls you can physically hurl while reading this. Main sis aint that bright either.

I dont really have much to say about this one. It was a good buffer to read in between reading other book series

I might check out the rest of the Play Hard series when I've made a bigger dent on my tbr lol

I Hate You - Ilsa Madden-Mills

Series: The Hook Up #3

OKAY SO, the two main characters names are Blaze and Charisma. I think that says a lot about it already.

He's a college football star that wants to get into the NFL. She's a sorority girl trying to avoid the guy around campus bcs they had a past

Lots of switching POVs. It bothered me a little bit but don't let that discourage you from reading this!

a lot of back and forth between these two about wanting to be together but also wanting to get rid of each other lol

not sure if I'll read the other books in this series but I have "I Promise You" too so we'll see after that.

The Mistake - Elle Kennedy

Series: Off-Campus #2

Is this an Elle Kennedy review list or what? 😂 no regrets tho, her writing is great. I've had a hard time trying to fault it. You really just want to keep reading and force yourself to take a breather AGSHJDK

this was a fun read. Logan is your typical hockey himbo but hes an endearing guy with a heart. Grace is a sweetheart that you just want to put in your pocket.

The way he won the girl in the end tho !! I'm melting on the floor. That was beyond cute.

Nothing much to say. READ IT. <3

The Deal - Elle Kennedy

Series: Off-Campus #1

WHOOOOO THIS ONE. Also a fave. A little heavy on sensitive content that might trigger people (ie. rape)

Once again, I am left here to yearn for another fictional character that I know I'll never meet the real life equivalent of him. sigh. Curse you, Elle. *shakes fist*

Garrett is an idiot, but such a sweet idiot. 😢

The Hannah and Garrett dynamic: IMMACULATE

I want to say so many things but also dont want to spoil the whole story for anyone who's insane enough to waste their time reading my post.

I'll try to explain it super simple without giving away too much (i hope). Basically: girl wants hot jock. Hot jock doesn't know girl exists. Other hot jock needs help with school and seeks help from girl. Girl agrees only if Other hot jock helps her get the guy. By fake dating Other hot jock. You get where this is going right?

A Favor for A Favor - Helena Hunting

Series: All-In #2

*inhale* *exhale* *SCREAMS*

okay now that we've got that out of the way, I would like to summarize my review of this book to: Its just fucking porn. No plot. Its not at all graphic about the steamy-ness imo but ooooh lord its just 😳🔥😥💦👁👄👁

My guy Bishop, is himbo™. The poster boy for himbos with the underwear to match it. You'll get it.

The Chase - Elle Kennedy

Series: Briar U #1

ofc how could we ever go wrong with a "Oh my god. They were roommates!" trope. Another good read.

Summer is adorable as hell and how I envision her in my mind...hell yeah I'd be so into her

Fitzy is probably ranked 3rd in my himbos from the Briar U universe. Logan and Garrett might be tied for 2nd.

tw: sexual harassment by a prof

The Risk - Elle Kennedy

Series: Briar U #2

fuuucking hell Jake Connelly. Ranked 1st in the hockey himbo universe.

Jake and Brenna. These two are a fucking hurricane.

*dial tone* Hey God-- me again. Again. Here's the thing, remember me begging for a John Tucker? Yeah, I'd totally settle for a Jake. Call me when you get this!

Okay to keep it simple, its an enemies to lovers trope.

BUT istg it is so much more. Brenna is a girlboss™ no doubt

atNetflix, I hate you 99.9% of the time but if you make this into a movie and do this right, I wouldn't be opposed to it.

Enemies - Tijan

BABES !!!! BABES WHEN I TELL YOU THIS BOOK IS SO-- 😳

fuck I can't even describe it. The angst, the yearning, the sex

I am a Christian (non-practicing) but good God I need a confession after reading this

I don't think I even have words to properly talk about how much i loved reading this book.

THE LETTER 😭

The Dare - Elle Kennedy

Series: Briar U #4

Okay, as someone who also struggles with body image issues, this was a bit of a hard one to read. I took many breaks going through this one.

Girls are mean

Self-deprecating thoughts are mean

Conor is the biggest idiot in the universe and I'm so mad I can't physically punch a fictional character through a book.

im 5/23 of my tbr list. it was 5/14 but somehow my brain decided to add 9 more books for my own pleasure and torture ♡