#goblinbaby

[spoofymcgee]

thanks, all. you guys are super awesome. today is a new (and really fuckin hot) day, so i'm here to tell you about the tiny criminal gremlin that is my five year old sister i babysat for my mom yesterday.

so. we keep small plastic spoons in the hall cabinet. goblinbaby know this. she also knows that we keep the chocolate spread (for her) and the peanut butter (for me when i have not eaten anything all day) in a cabinet that is too high for her to reach.

she has realized that the drawer beneath the countertop under the cabinet will jam open if you position a pot lid right.

open just enough, she has realized, to support a very small person scrambling up onto the countertop.

i, as seen above, had one of the days of all time yesterday and so was exhausted and hungy and thought perhaps i was hallucinating when i walked into the kitchen and found her mountain-goating her way onto the counter, two spoons clutched in her chubby little fingers.

she did a victory dance once she got to the top, which i caught on video.

she then pulled the chocolate spread out of the cabinet, jammed one of the spoons into it, and shoved the whole glob in her little mouth.

cue the chipmunk cheeks.

at this point i made my presence known in an attempt to steal the chocolate spread container, which was successful except for that she'd already stuffed her face with it.

and while i was putting it away, somewhere higher that she (hopefully) can't reach, she made the decision to commit more crimes.

she stole the chunky peanut butter and in the four seconds it took me to put the chocolate on top of the fridge, she'd gotten off the counter and run away to the stairwell, where i found her just stuffing spoonfuls of peanut butter in her mouth as fast as she could.

i fuckin love this kid.

feeling like a ✨ real fuckup ✨ right now so in an effort to remind myself that i deserve love imma make a list of the shit i got done today:

- got up at five am to study enough to make sure i'd pass my exam

- checked in w/ friends (and commiserated over how much exams suck)

- took said exam and didn't scream and rip it to shreds despite the fucking terrible image quality of the questions (the letters?? were??? blurry????)

- went to my fuckin lecture

- did not punch the girl advocating genocide as a solution to terrorism

- did not bite off my groupmates' heads despite the fact that they changes our project topic, again, and we have none of the seven pages due for today finished

- learned to read half a chapter of megillah for purim next week

- ate lunch

- stayed for my late class and completed the assignment

- went to my shift at work and rocked that

- am going to bed at a reasonable time

and that's a wrap for today, babes! come back in the morning and ill tell y'all about what my baby sister did today, which was far more entertaining.

also, it's your turn now. tell me what you did today.

[inukruger]

"Hahahaha... Well?" #DavidBowie #Labyrinth #MagicDance #goblinbaby #youremindmeofthebabe #muppets #muppet #goblin #goblins

[plundering-productions]

Hands up... How's been making lock down babies. Pre order your now.(baby not included) #lockdownbabies #babygrows #badyclothing #altbaby #rockabillybaby #punkbaby #gothbaby #babewiththepower #labyrinth #elfbaby #babyinblack #elfmagic #elfmajic #battleelf #elfwarrior #goblinbaby #goblinbabywear #goblinprince #goblinprincess #magicgoblin (at Leeds, England, UK) https://www.instagram.com/p/CBnV856na4U/?igshid=16u3yw1jo3lxo

[michellelynn976]

I am rocking my #pillboxhat and I love it so much. Which looks better? My pillbox hat with my #beehivehairdo or with my hair down? I like the beehive look myself. I love my pillbox hat. #audreyhepburn and #ladygaga inspired me and my #vintagehomemaker #sister @goblinbabies told me to get one. You're right sissy, it fits me. #vintage #vintagrglamour #vintagegloves #vintagagestyle #vintagedress #vintagehousewife #vintageclothing #flowerdress #gloves #white #pink #apron #Pearls #makeup #1950sfashion #1950shousewife #1950shomemaker https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpsyej1HJgj/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1n1f6wqqbzuyl

[ivstudios]

Warmup drawing!

I found a disturbing amount of “Here’s Pearl, but fixed” art out there and I want you to know you should all be ashamed of yourselves. Pearl is a perfect little goblinbaby and she doesn't need to change for anyone.

[michellelynn976]

Happy Easter to all my sweethearts and baby dolls! You call me a blessing, but it is you who have blessed my life. I love my family. You aren't my friends, you are my family! God bless all of you and God bless your lives with love, happiness, and safety. Be safe, stay wonderful and I love you all. @selena_s_perfecto @sweetheartinkd @dantalionssigil @goblinbabies @melissa_ryan6 @secretlystepford @stepfordwifeuserguide @the.vintage.housewife @retro_sandra @annetheantiquesoul @anakasparianofficial @sarah.jane.johnson https://www.instagram.com/p/B-3_7kzAl0T/?igshid=19z0tvfocsfmv