#go follow op they r cool as hell pls i loves them

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

Another gift for you Babbit, this one is a little darker, a little more spooky. I hope you enjoy it, or at the very least, you don't hate it. Thank you for your lovely stories, you're a real one :3c

I did it again, I can't stay away from this AU I'msosorry- It's my favorite spooky Babbit story and it lives rent free in my mind. New Afton virus art just dropped? You know the vibes 🙃

So, if you would, have a slice of feral and problematic Virus! Sun and Moon? Please don't hold it against them, you don't know what they've been through. (｡•́︿•̀｡)

(These super short one-shots contain semi-graphic depictions of violence. There is depictions of blood, minor amounts of gore, and implied death of humans. I don't think I'm good enough of a writer to really, properly scare anyone, but I also do not want to make anyone uncomfy. I would rate this at 13+, but if you're squeamish, then you might not like these. I'm hiding them under the cut.)

☼ ✴ ─────── ✧ ─────── ✴ ☼ Into the Swing of Things:

The hallway was bright, the lights blazed like white fire clinging to the ceiling. The hum of the electricity buzzed in the background, it's hard work going unnoticed. The initial swing had only been a tap, really. The bat had made more of a clatter when it hit the floor than the leg. Humans were so…fragile.

It made this so easy!

Yellow hands flew to rosy cheeks, a joyous laughter floated over the sniveling at his feet. Sun just couldn't contain his excitement, he was being so helpful! His eyes flashed fluorescent purple, pupils curled into hearts.

Absolutely anything, anything for you!

"Oh, gosh! That must've hurt, you're critically injured!" Sun giggled, pitching to static like a fizzy hiccup. "I'm getting better at this!"

"Please- please! Someone help me-!" Ah, the magic words. He really didn't have to shout, though. Sun gave a bemused smirk to the man slinking across the stained carpet. He really should've considered the consequences of working with Afton. Oh well. He could try to crawl away, but what's the point?

All he had to say was please!

"Yes, yes of course!" Another giggle ebbed into a wistful sigh. "I'm sorry, I was having too much fun. Where are my manners? Here, allow me!"

The animatronic's hands left his face, reaching down in a swift dip to pluck the bat off the floor by it's handle. With a twirl of his hand, he have the glossed wood a quick once-over. With a fake gasp, he theatrically flicked a previously dislodged chunk of Mr. Michael off of the bat, before a sharp nod of approval.

This part always went by so fast. Sun's processor almost had a hard time keeping up. The bat swung, a shattering crack as his target burst in a shower of splintered everything. The man went limp, what was left of his body rag-dolled to the floor in an obscenely wet plop. The handle of the bat practically disintegrated in the metal vice grip. Sun flexed his joints open, and emptied the remaining shards of wood onto the floor.

The silence threatened to swallow the room, before a light 'tsk tsk'ing hung in its place.

'Goodness, I really went overboard, didn't I?" Sun scolded himself, but he couldn't stop the wide grin stretched across his face plate. He was getting better at this. His thoughts drifted to you, his sweet, precious Sunshine. You were going to be so, so happy with him!

Sun wiggled in his casing, hands flapping in a little pulse of nervous, jubilant energy. The bells tied to his wrists chimed in unison, danging from shimmery, purple ribbons. He was almost lost in a fit of laughter before a small creak of metal caught his attention from the end of the hall.

It was a small cleaning cart, with a Staff bot in tow. The little fella had paused in the hall when he had seen Sun, patiently waiting to help with his new task.

'Oh hello there! Your timing in impeccable as always my dear friend!" Sun cooed at the modest bot, watching a small pink glow rise from its grey face. The sunny animatronic chuckled, sweet and fluffy, before his attention turned back to the mess he had made of the hall. The staff bot approached, stoic in the face of anything, as usual.

"Guess I really knocked him out of the park huh?" Sun poised, jabbing his thumb over at the leftovers scattered on the hallway floor, his eyes playfully sparkled at the staff bot. It's shoulders slumped, if only minutely, before it rolled out from behind the cart, deciding to start without Sun and his antics. Aw.

"You're right, I guess these jokes are kinda out of my league." The bright eyed animatronic tilted and bent around the staff bot, chest and legs facing the wrong ways against the arch of his spine. His rays spun with a silly whirl next to the staff bot, flashing his coy, expecting smirk. Sun was never one to give up so easily.

The staff bot let out a flitter of beeps, a laugh it had tried to hide from the jester bouncing next to it. Sun gave a pleased hum, satisfied with the reaction, for now. He untwisted, straightening with a series of clicks. Alright, alright, he had his fun.

Now, it was clean-up time.

 ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ When the Stars Suffer Alone:

Moon had never considered himself very patient. He certainly did not fancy waiting on the last breath of trespassers either, especially when it was in the dingiest bathroom in the whole Plex.

But time didn't seem to matter when you were on his mind.

It was a little thing, really. Such a small, delicate strand of silk, yet it meant so much to the celestial animatronic. A smooth, purple ribbon hugged the palm of his hand, the tails of the tiny bow fluttered against the back of his wrist. Even in times like this, he felt his focus drift away to you. He wanted to hold you tight, keep you safe…

You had nothing to worry about, not when your Knight in Shining Nightcap was around.

A choked gurgle tugged Moon away from his thoughts. A lazy glimpse landed to the useless pile of human on the floor as it twitched like gelatin. His chest heaved, looking for any sliver of life left in his punctured body. Moon was not rushed or worried, this guy wasn't going anywhere. Not looking like a fresh slice of swiss cheese.

No where to go.

The gurgling breath continued, and Moon cocked an eyebrow at the mess. His eyes were heavy, a soft but a pretentious glint of pity shined through them.

"You didn't give me much choice, you know. You really should have held better company." Moon chuckled, his voice held it's vicious tone, despite the serene smile on his face. His hands clasped together, a dreamy sigh of artificial breath hissing out of his fan.

"But I suppose some people learn the easy way…"

A hand lifted off the floor, a desperate, shaky attempt at salvation. It gave a pathetic tug on Moon's silken pants, before the last bit of air finally escaped its bloodied prison. The hand fell, dejected, back into the pool of blood on the tile with a muted splat.

"And some people learn the hard way."

The long row of mirror along the titled wall glinted with a purple hue- Moon's vivid eyes were the only source of light in the pitch black of the bathroom. He had felt pretty clever, cornering this trespasser here in record time. And it was even on tile, so much easier to clean than carpet.

And away from his precious Starlight. You shouldn't need to fret over such intruders. You had better things to do. Moon's eyes fluttered at the thought of you and Sun, who was probably insisting you stay for another round of Hide and Seek. Midnight blue fingers drummed together in thought.

He wanted to play, too. Anything to spend time with you. Anything to keep you close…

Maybe you could hide together.

Moon's eyes shot down to his pants before he huffed. He was going to need to change before he could do anything with you. It wasn't a good look, running around with hand prints stained on his clothes. Infuriating rule breaker, his thoughts curdled at the sight of the meaty lump on the floor.

Humans were so…fragile. His hands clapped together, a nervous shutter rattled deep in his core. A memory file opened, unprompted; an unwanted video file blocking his vision input. Blood, so much blood, skin, a scream he never wanted to hear out of you again. Why now?

"Moon…hel-p…help me!"

The animatronic let out a growl, his head shook until the file closed. His sight returned to the cool of the dark room, but he found no comfort in the lonely shadows. It happened so often, his code would bug and open things he did not want to ever see again. No matter what he seemed to do, they were always there to haunt him. He couldn't seem to delete them, they always came back.

No one was ever going to take you away from him. Ever. Your Nightlight would always keep you safe.

Moon left the bathroom in a hurry, a sudden burning in his wires to see you overwhelmed his common sense. With a swift leap into the air he was clipped to his cord, before zipping to the Daycare like a bat out of hell.

Two wet floor bots obediently blocked the door to the bathroom in Moon's absence; as they awaited for the staff bots that were surely on the way. There was a lot of work to do, after all.

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ☼ ☾ :･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧

IM LIVING. IM ALIVE. AND IT IS A WONDERFUL, GLORIOUS DAY, BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN BLESSED BY TUMBLR USER @underhanded-lamb . MY CROPS ARE WATERED. MY SKIN IS CLEAR. There is so much love in my heart for these lil fics and for u who wrote them sdhfshdfj thank u

[unofficialkfamtranscripts]

King Falls AM - Episode 5: Night of the Living Dread

View on Google Docs

Summary: July 1, 2015 - Sammy & Ben learn of some breaking news regarding the Lake Hatchenhaw John Doe, but not everyone is as pleased as the broadcast duo.

[Podcast intro music]

Announcer Dear listeners, please note that the following program may contain views that do not reflect that of King Falls AM, its management, or its subsidiaries. Listener discretion is advised.

[KFAM intro music]

Sammy You’re listening to King Falls AM, that’s 660 on the radio dial. I’m your host, Sammy Stevens, and as always we are joined by producer and co-host extraordinaire, Ben Arnold.

Ben [trying not to be amused] You’re so- you’re so happy, aren’t you? You’re a child. Getting so giddy over that message.

Sammy Listening to a warning before a radio broadcast I’m on has literally been on the bucket list for a long time. Thanks Merv!

Ben *laughter* Ridiculous. A glutton for punishment.

Sammy What can I say? I enjoy a nice game of hard ball! Uh, y��know, but enough about what Merv doesn’t want you to hear, let’s talk about what he does want you to hear. And what do we have cooking tonight, Ben?

Ben Dude, it’s stacked alright? Stacked. We’ve got the- lovely Miss Emily Potter from the King Falls Library giving us her picks for enlightened summer reading.

Sammy Terrific! We always love speaking with Emily!

Ben You and me both.

Sammy I said “we,” Ben.

Ben Uh, I know. I- *breathes in* [stilted] I- We-We-uh, We’ve got some really cool news! here. We-we are announcing the line-up for the first annual King Falls Ambient Music Festival. That’s coming up the second hour.

Sammy Wait a second. The King Falls Ambient Music Festival? Is this town even big enough for a festival?

Ben Oh yeah! It’s like Coachella[1] but for hipsters that just want to relax. It’s all about “setting the mood.”

Sammy You know, I’m wondering if they’re gonna make it to a second annual.

Ben And then, um, [reluctant and slipping into mumbling] opening up the show we-we’ve got the- doctor *mumbling*

Sammy I-I’m sorry, Ben, what was that? You’re trailing off, buddy.

Ben We have that umm, *sniffs, lets out breath* one… guy. You know that- fo- w- talking about that *deep breath* one thing—

Sammy [trying to cut him off] Ben—

Ben —from a month ago or so—?

Sammy What? What are you talking about?

Ben You know— May- maybe we should start it with Uh, callers first! [mildly frantic] Just-uh-Give us a call at 424-279-3858 and let’s talk about… *tsk* anything! Let’s uh, whats your-whats your-whats-whats on your mind King Falls?

Sammy Ladies and gentlemen, put down your phones for a second. What Ben is trying to say is we’ve got a scoop here this evening on King Falls AM. We’re gonna be speaking with—

Ben [cutting Sammy off]Or you can tweet us! @kingfallsam. I-I-I will literally talk about anything right now. Even to Mr. Derschwitz about that weird toenail thing. Let-lets-lets go, people!

Sammy I thought we agreed—

Ben I know. Sammy, I’m sorry it’s just, [slightly more frantic] I’m-I’m not feelin’ the best here. Alright? my stomach, is all… knotted up, just thinking about this.

Sammy That is journalism. That feeling is journalism—

Ben [speaking over Sammy] I think it might actually be an ulcer! It Tastes, like Fear and Feels, like Cancer . It’s way more than anxiety. I-I’m gonna call Dr. Raúl, at break.

Sammy He’s a chiropractor!

Ben Maybe he can refer me?

Sammy Power through it, buddy! Look at this folks, we got somebody dialing into the hotline right now! You ready for this Ben? Come on.

Ben Please, be Reverend Hawthorne so we can talk about the Revival next month.

Sammy Oh stop it. You know he isn’t even scheduled!

Ben I just thought— maybe that’s how prayers work, I don’t know, I’m not a reverend!

Sammy King Falls AM, you’re on the air.

Dr. Rosenblum [Dr. Rosenblum’s voice is measured and monotonous and mildly creepy at all times] Good evening, this is Dr. Jeffery Rosenblum, with the, King Falls County Coroner’s Office.

Ben C-can I please just say—

Sammy Dr. Rosenblum, it is a pleasure to speak with you this evening.

Rosenblum Excited to be here, Sammy. Ecstatic even. We listen on slow nights.

Ben That’s the scariest thing I’ve ever heard.

Sammy Much appreciated, Doc. Now, as fate would have it, you were the overseeing physician working on the Lake Hatchenhaw John Doe, is that correct?

Ben Doc? Can you just, hold on for- one- moment- please?

Rosenblum Of course, Ben I—

Sammy Don’t start, Ben! We agreed to see this through.

Ben All I’m saying i- lemme finish- a- i-is that maybe it’s not our place *deep breath* to break this kind of news.

Sammy Fine. You know what? You’re right! Let’s just give this to our friends down at Channel 13 and let them be the ones to alert the public about this.

Ben [journalist voice] Doc, Ben Arnold. Tell us about cracking open the mystery body.

Sammy [quietly] Oh.

Rosenblum It’s true that I was the operating physician on that particular John Doe, y-es, irrefutablyy

Sammy Now, as I understand, your official report was released yesterday morning, doctor, but amazingly enough, not one publication or news station in our town- including King Falls AM- reported on it.

Rosenblum You are correct. Busy news day- one would assume.

Ben So, that means, you are— free to talk about it on air.

Rosenblum I would be elated

Sammy First and foremost on everyone’s minds: were there any signs of, uh, y’know, the lake mo- *sighs* I can’t.

Ben Did Kingsie make the body, bite the big one?

Rosenblum There was no evidence that a creature large or small had anything to do with the deceased.

Ben *sigh of relief* That- I knew Kingsie didn’t have it in her.

Sammy Now, Dr. Rosenblum, can you tell us if there was any foul play involved at all?

Rosenblum During our first autopsy we were not able to distinguish with certainty the cause of death. But there were no signs of foul play

Sammy I’m sorry, did you say “first” autopsy?

Ben [confused] Is that normal? Did you- find out the cause of death during the… second autopsy?

Rosenblum Indeed. It was six individual gunshot wounds to the victim’s head. Three shots to the temporal lobe, two to the mendulla oblongata—

Sammy What?! Six gunshot wounds?!

Rosenblum To the cranium, yes. One to the frontal lobe, another to—

Ben So the Lake Hatchenhaw John Doe was, murdered?

Sammy I can’t believe this! This is big! Why didn’t one news outlet report this thing yesterday?!

Rosenblum Well, the cause of death was inconclusive and with no signs of foul play, it was not exactly a juicy story.

Ben and Sammy Wait a second.

Rosenblum …yes?

Sammy I’m sorry, doc. I’m not in the medical orrr criminal fields but, how is six gunshots not foul play?

Rosenblum Well, that was between the first autopsy and the second. The gunshots were self-defense administered via Deputy Kreighauser at my behest.

Sammy Ben, we’re gonna wanna get Troy on the phone and see what he’s got to say about this.

Ben “Things Ben Arnold would never think under ordinary circumstances for 800, Alex.”[2]

Sammy Doc, while we’re getting Deputy Troy on the line, would you mind if we took a quick break to hear from one of our sponsors?

Rosenblum That’s just- Dandy.

[light bg music]

Greg Frickard After a long day’s work or a tough day’s play, you probably just wanna come home and relax. No need to slave over a hot stove for hours on end. Well that’s where we come in! Here at Granny Frickard’s, we know that the less time you spend doing the things you don’t like, is the more time you spend with the ones you love. So come get some of the best frog legs that money can buy. Granny Frickard’s French-fried farm-fresh never-frozen filleted-and-fricasseed fried-and-flambeed frog legs. Mm-mm-mm. So get on down to Granny Frickard’s Froggery at the corner of Main Street and 7th Avenue. We’ll put some pep in your step and some hop in your heart.

[KFAM intro music]

Sammy And we’re back on King Falls AM, here with King Falls County Coroner, Dr. Jeffery Rosenblum.

Rosenblum A Pleasure.

Sammy Do you have Troy, Ben?

Ben He’s booking one of the Williams boys for mooning. He’ll call us in a few.

Sammy I’m a little out of sorts here, doc. Can you explain what happened between the first inconclusive autopsy and the point where Troy filled the cadaver full of lead.

Rosenblum Of course. As I was finishing the initial post-mortem, it came to my attention that the deceased began to emit a hissing sound, fluctuating between the lower thorax and the larynx.

Ben Oh my God.

Rosenblum I called for Deputy Kreighauser and he entered, as I wanted someone else to see this- phenomenon. That’s when the John Doe began a slight, thrashing about the upper torso.

Ben Um… are you saying—

Rosenblum The deputy began to fumble for his sidearm while we both discerned that something was wildly- amiss. The deceased opened its eyes and instantly grabbed for the lapel of my lab coat with voracious tenacity.

Ben Wh- ah- go on.

Rosenblum It gnashed its teeth as I emitted a terrified, albeit, high pitched, scream. And that’s when Troy unholstered his sidearm and administered six lethal shots to the reanimated corpse’s cranium.

Ben A zombie.

Sammy Alright, is there- [fumbling] Let’s just say- is there-

Ben We’ve got Troy on the line.

Deputy Troy [in bg] I don’t care if he was only joshin’. You can’t show your G-D derriere out in public! [car door slams] [pleasantly] Hey boys, what’s goin’ on tonight?

Sammy You tell us, Troy, holy geez! Uh, we’ve got Dr. Rosenblum on the line here and—

Deputy Troy Is this about the zombie?

Ben Yes! So-so you’re confirming this story, Troy?

Deputy Troy Well, hell yeah I’m confirming! I had to do three hours of damn paper work from unloadin’ my pistola into a corpse! Sheriff Gunderson was not the happiest of campers.

Ben [excited and awed] This is amazing… This is unprecedented .

Sammy [skeptical] This is a little unbelievable, Troy.

Rosenblum It is a first in my profession. Believe you me. [still tonelessly] Wowzers.

Deputy Troy Honest engine[3] boys. I capped the all get out of that thing! It had the doc by the face ‘bout to start chewing!

Rosenblum You’re my hero, Deputy Troy.

Deputy Troy Shucks, wasn’t nothin’ special.

Ben [slightly sullen] Except killing the first instance of a zombie in King Falls since—

Sammy Don’t say “since”.

Ben … Well… Since that one time at the mall in the '80s.

Sammy No, that’s not a real thing, Ben. That’s a film.

Ben [worked up] Sammy? How many extraordinary things are gonna have to SLAP you right in the face to make you buy into this? KING FALLS, MAN.

Deputy Troy You know me, Sammy. I always shoot ya straight. But it was the craziest sh[bleep]t I’ve ever seen. I mean it was like my-ex-wife-needs-alimony-money crazy.

Ben See? Even Barney Fife[4] saw it.

Sammy *sighs* I just—

Rosenblum I don’t want to cause an uproar here, but since that exam, there have been, other cases.

Ben Of frickin’ zombies?

Rosenblum Of reanimation among corpses… yes.

Deputy Troy Doc, you just give me a call if you need. I’m more than happy to go Clint Eastwood if the situation arises.

Rosenblum Will do, Deputy. Thank you so much for your- assistance. Without you, there may not have been this- interview.

Deputy Troy [proud] To protect and serve.

Sammy I can’t take all this in right now, Dr. Rosenblum I- e- Thank you so much for your insightful information.

Rosenblum As they say, [still monotone] “you got it, duude.”

[click, dial tone]

Ben You okay, Sammy? You… don’t look so well.

Deputy Troy Ah, hell, boys.[siren whoop] I gotta go. I’ll call you back later tonight! One of the Williams boys is tryin’ ta saw through the bars outside the jailhouse? [sirens in bg] [through megaphone] Jacob Williams put your hands UP and the file DOWN.

[click, dial tone]

Ben Alright King Falls, you’ve heard our story, let’s hear yours. Have you or anyone you know experienced anything like what the doctor spoke of? Reanimation? The walking—

Sammy Don’t.

Ben You know what I mean. Give us a call or tweet us.

Sammy Looks like the board is lighting up!

Ben Um…

Sammy What’s up? Okay, it can’t be any crazier than what we just heard, Ben.

Ben Line One, Sammy.

Sammy Welcome to King Falls AM, you’re on with Sammy and Ben.

Line 1 [female, almost sounds automated] Good evening, Sammy—

Sammy Do I know you ma'am?

Riley — please hold for Mayor Grisham.

Ben He… Probably just wants us to— mark these tapes as, evidence. *nervous laugh* Right, Sammy?

Sammy Or burn them.

Riley Sammy Stevens, Mayor Grisham.

Sammy Mayor?

Mayor Grisham Sammy… Ben.

Sammy You’re on live on King Falls AM, sir.

Mayor Grisham [commanding] Take me off and go to break. We need to chat.

Sammy No can do. Ben says we aren’t scheduled for break for another- uh- at least ten minutes.

Mayor Grisham Ben. Cut. To. Commercial.

Ben Uh- uh- uh- the thing is- I- I- I can’t- do that. Sir.

Mayor Grisham [threateningly pleasant] You boys want to talk live on air? We can talk live on air.

Sammy [challenging] Nothin’ to hide on this end of the phone, Mayor Grisham.

Mayor Grisham I hear your snide remarks, Sammy. I’ve read the transcripts.

Sammy Which! let’s be honest, is pretty weird. We’re a late night AM talk show, why are you bothering with us?

Mayor Grisham Oh, I don’t bother with you. I try to keep up to date with all the local news and entertainment. I gotta say, I was really happy a big city radio guy decided to come play host at our little radio station.

Sammy Well, I’m more than happy to—

Mayor Grisham I wasn’t finished… But I have to say, I’m a little less than thrilled with [accusingly] all the excitement you brought with you.

Sammy I’d hardly call reporting the news “excitement”, sir—

Mayor Grisham It’s interesting to me that I don’t see Channel 13 breaking these crazy stories.

Ben [quickly] No offense, your honor, but those idiots don’t know their a[bleep]holes from their elbows.

Mayor Grisham And you boys being on site when these “events” happen? [softly, still accusing] It’s a little bit of a coincidence don’t you think?

Sammy Are you insinuating that we are staging these events, Mayor?

Mayor Grisham I’m stating facts. I’m sure your ratings are way, way up there since all these sensational events seem to coincide with your broadcast. Why do you think that is? Furthermore, I mean who’s up listening to you at this ungodly hour of the night?!

Sammy Seemingly most of the town, Sir. As well as whomever you’ve hired to keep an ear on us.

Mayor Grisham I’ve tried to be nice about this… And I tried to be civil… but I think it’s about time that you troublemakers changed formats. No more of this funny business. It’s not good for the listeners. It’s not good for the residents. And honestly? it’s not good for me. I don’t appreciated being painted in this light, gentlemen.

Sammy Oh! You mean the light where you as a public service,[sic] try to quell the voice of the people.

Ben It’s not your right to tell us what we can and can’t report on, sir. All due respect.

Mayor Grisham [rudely] All due respect, Ben Arnold. Just a couple of months ago you were digging up old records on eBay for Chet Sebastian to run on about. Now you’re a media star?? That’s worrisome! Seems you fellas have All the reasons in the world to fabricate these issues, and I have to say I’m not gonna sit here and listen to this, while you LIE TO THE GOOD PEOPLE OF KING FALLS.

Sammy Well, when we start “fabricating” and “making things up,” you can come throw the book at us. But until then- [click, dial tone] Whoops! Looks like you just got disconnected. I’d wait for you to give us a call back and all, but with it not being an election year I probably shouldn’t hold my breath.

Ben Line One iiis lit up again, Sammy.

Sammy [insincerely] Oh, sorry about that Mayor! I must have fabricated accidentally dumping your call when-

Esther Rollens [heavy metal music in bg] [voice old and wavering] Did you boys fund a lavender ball of yarn in there? Been looking for it all week! [click, dial tone]

Ben [shaken] Sammy, I think that commercial might do us some good right now.

[KFAM outro]

[CREDITS]

References

[1] Coachella - The Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival (commonly called Coachella or the Coachella Festival) is an annual music and arts festival held at the Empire Polo Club in Indio, California, in the Coachella Valley in the Colorado Desert.

[2] Reference to the TV game show Jeopardy!

[3] I honestly can’t tell if he’s saying “honest engine” or “honest injun” but i’mma go with the one that’s technically incorrect but also not super racist.

[4] Barney Fife - Deputy from the Andy Griffith Show. Calling a police officer or authority figure "Barney Fife" has become an American slang term for gross ineptitude or overzealousness.