#giving her my appendectomy scars because I fucking can

[dingostrash]

Be weird about Fujino

It is time,

[mylifeasaserver]

YOU FOOL

Both remaining new hires have been told time and time again that we don’t cancel memberships - that’s a manager thing and a wonderful time to, in essence, tell somebody “it’s not my job” and be rewarded for it.

I just got back from the gym. One of the new hires was working out and INSTEAD OF DOING WHAT I FUCKING SAID AND TELLING FUCKING PEOPLE WE DON’T FUCKING CANCEL FUCKING MEMBERSHIPS she decided, after staffed hours on a day that she wasn’t working TO FUCKING CANCEL ONE FUCKING MEMBERSHIP AND OFFER A FUCKING SIGNIFICANT FUCKING DISCOUNT TO KEEP ANOTHER FROM FUCKING CANCELLING!

I’m so pissed. 

So she’s working out, right? One of the members asks her to help him cancel his membership. Instead of saying “oh hey I’m not working and I can’t,” or “I’m not allowed to do that you’ll have to talk to the manager” or “I have a boyfriend” or even “why don’t we go out back and I’ll show you my appendectomy scar” she decides to handle it herself.

No. Instead she offers him a $10/mo discount to stay. Which, if she were the manager wouldn’t be so bad. Or if he weren’t already on a discounted rate. Or if he were already paying more than $10/mo to start with.

Then some woman hears about the discount being offered to stay and threatens to cancel if she doesn’t get the discount too. This stupid ass new hire tells her she can just cancel.

I walk into the gym to work out and there’s the new hire sitting behind the desk. I’m notoriously fucking stupid so I go ask what’s up, figuring maybe she was doing some mundane shit or something.

Instead she’s trying to figure out how to edit data in what I call the “deep system.” The deep system is where all the sensitive data is kept such as credit cards, monthly rates, and fees. We (anybody not the manager or me under limited circumstances) are NEVER supposed to go there. And yet, here’s this dumbass fucking around with shit she doesn’t know how to use trying to do shit she doesn’t understand for a job function she doesn’t have.

She asks me for help both with the cancel/discount mess she made and clocking in so she’s paid while she does it because our system doesn’t let you clock in unless you’re scheduled.

OH HELL NO.

Step 1: Get Dummy out from behind the desk since she’s probably fired anyway.

This next one will be fun.

Step 2: Call the manager. At home. On her day off. Tell her what went on so we can get it fixed.

Step 3: Follow her instructions to reset everything to how it was before Dummy tried fucking with shit.

Step 4: Hand the phone to Dummy and give her the “older brother watching younger sister get in trouble” look that I’ve perfected over years of being an older brother and watch (admittedly, with some amusement) as she gets her ass handed to her over the phone.

Step 5: Make a note for the manager to review permissions in the system for new hires since simple instructions are too complex - and to call the two people that think they’re cancelled. Dummy didn’t have them sign anything so...

Step 6: Listen to new hire try to explain herself to me, as though I have any control over whether or not she’s fired or in the doghouse or anything else. 

Step 7: Inform her how fucking impossibly stupid she is. Remind her that all she had to do was literally NOTHING and nobody would be upset with her.

Step 8: Do my scheduled workout and take time between sets to shake my head at the sheer stupidity.

Step 9: Go home and write about it so the post can have 14 notes, generate one anon hate letter, and be glossed over by the other 22 people who follow this blog and mostly ignored because it’s not a damn meme.

Step 9: Hate.

Not how I envisioned my workout starting. 

On the plus side, the game demos that I downloaded on my Switch should be ready to play now. Huzzah!

In even BETTER news, One Punch Man IS FOR A FACT getting a season 2! -J