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hms-chill · 5 years ago

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Mother’s Day

Summary: Six snapshots of three Mother's days across the years.

2005, Edinburgh, Scotland Henry's got his mum's hand in one of his and a massive picnic basket he'd insisted he could carry in the other. Bea and Philip have run ahead, and Henry's starting to envy their freedom, but he refuses to make their mum carry a picnic basket on a day that's supposed to be all about looking after her. But then he feels a hand in his hair, and another taking the basket for him, and he turns to see his dad, an easy grin on his face and his guitar slung over his back. "Look at you, all grown up and helping your mum. Were you good for her today?" Henry beams. Arthur's been out on a set for hours; he's still got bits of makeup on his face and some product in his hair. Henry thinks it makes him look like a superhero. "I was really, really good!" "Is that right? Cat, was Henry really, really good today?"

"He was," Catherine says, grinning. "All three of them have been wonderful. They were all big helps getting things ready for our picnic."

Henry grins, and newly freed of the weight of the picnic basket, he runs up to join Philip and Bea while his parents share a kiss above his head. Catherine calls to them to stay within eyesight as the family make their way out of Holyrood and up toward Arthur's Seat. The kids fall back a bit as it gets steeper and they get tired, but they make it to the top of the Salisbury Crags and Arthur lays out their picnic while the kids pick flowers, Bea and Philip handing their considerably larger boquetes to Henry so that he can be the one to present them to their mum. After dinner, Arthur gets out his guitar and plays, cycling through some of Catherine's favorites and teaching the kids "Loch Lomond" so they'll be ready when they visit the loch tomorrow. As it starts to get darker, they pack up and finish the climb to the top of Arthur's Seat, and Bea takes pictures of their parents, then a PPO takes pictures of their family as the sun sets behind them, and Henry is so happy he can hardly believe it. 2005, Washington, DC Alex is awake first, and for a second, he's not sure where he is. It's brighter than his bedroom, with whiter walls and a window without any real curtains yet. But then he rolls over, and June is still asleep in a twin bed across the room, and the cars outside are too loud, and it all comes back. They're in Washington, DC. They're visiting their parents for Mother's Day, and they're going to see all the places they work, but first, he and June have something planned. He hops out of his bed and into hers, shaking her awake despite her grumbles. "June! June, June, June. Get up, get up, get up. We have to make breakfast!" Their dad has promised to help them if they need it, but Alex and June decided last night that, at eight and eleven, they're grown up enough to do it themselves. Alex has been helping his dad pour and flip pancakes since he could reach the griddle, and June's been sitting on the counter pushing oranges into a juicer for as long as he can remember. Between the two of them, surely they can put something together. When Oscar comes in, he finds the kids in the middle of a whispered, but very heated, discussion about what exactly the instructions on the side of the box mean. They're both furiously mixing their own pancake batter in different bowls. June's looks better, but Alex refuses to give up. Oscar just laughs, and he helps fix Alex's so that it looks right, and then Alex shapes and flips pancakes while June makes orange juice and Oscar makes bacon and coffee. June finds a tray and she puts a yellow rose on one corner to make it look pretty. Once everything is assembled, Oscar disappears upstairs to make sure Ellen is actually in bed when the kids come to "wake her up" with breakfast in bed. She's been awake for a few hours at least, answering emails and drafting meeting agendas, but she can climb back into bed and let the kids think they've surprised her. Oscar snaps a picture of the three of them, Ellen grinning with a kid under each arm and the breakfast laid out in front of her, and it all feels perfect. 2020, London, England

Mother's Day is rainy, but that feels right. Henry writes a card for his mum, and they all have lunch together, but it's not right. Mother's Day used to be a day Arthur would always make sure he wasn't working, and he'd plan them something fun and exciting to do. But now, Catherine doesn't want to visit the London Eye or go to Holyrood or even take them to the V&A. She just wants to have a nice family lunch, so they have one, and Henry takes the barbs from Philip and his gran so that he doesn't ruin things for his mum. She wants them to get along for the day, so he doesn't fight back. He sits, and he's civil when Philip suggests casually that the public might be excited about a new royal suitor, and how great it would be for their public image if either Henry or Bea started dating. Henry sits quietly while his gran hints that he's been taking a bit too long to decide what to do with himself, and Philip all but outright says that he should be enlisting soon. He sits, and he eats his food, and he resists every urge to fight back or argue.

But after lunch, when their mum's back in her room and Philip is headed back to Anmer, Henry and Bea find their way to the music room. Bea gets her guitar, plucking out a few chords of "Loch Lomond" as Henry settles on the other end of the sofa with his phone. She hums what should be the lyrics "I'll be in Scotland afore you/ but me and my true love will never meet again", and Henry pretends he doesn't know the words. A few minutes of quiet chords later, he looks up from his phone to say, "hey, Bea? Happy Mother's Day. I... I know you didn't really ask for any of this, but I'm... you've been sort of a mum for me for the past few years, and I... I really appreciate it. I love you."

She puts down the guitar to hug him, and he asks, "do you think Mum will get better?"

"I'm... I'm not sure. I hope so. But we've got each other, alright? Whatever happens."

He nods, and that night, they sneak out together to eat Jaffa cakes and Cornettos in a courtyard outside the V&A. Bea brings her guitar, and she plays their parents' favorites, and Henry hopes that wherever their dad is, he's doing something special to help their mom feel loved.

2020, Washington, DC

Alex and June are planning on a traditional Mother's Day, one where they make their mom breakfast and she pretends to be surprised. But Alex is mid-pancake when Ellen appears in the kitchen to grab a muffin and tell them both she loves them and she's sorry, but something's come up and she's got to take a video call. She'll be ready for breakfast as soon as she can be, and she'll meet them when she can.

After an hour, Alex and June eat cold pancakes with warm orange juice alone. June's trying to be happy, but her mouth is doing that thing it does when she's disappointed, but not surprised. Alex is used to that look being directed at him after ignored texts and too-late nights. But it's Mother's Day, and they should be happy, even if their mom is busy. So he picks off the thorns and tucks the yellow rose behind her ear, then he steals her coffee and pancakes to put them on the tray and carry everything out to the Truman Balcony, June following him with half-hearted complaints. When their mom and Leo join them half an hour later, they've saved some pancakes and juice, and Ellen gets to spend at least half an hour as a mom before she's called back to the presidency, Leo promising her a nice dinner if she can find time in her schedule.

At least it's better than last year. Last year, Ellen had been pulled away from breakfast the moment she'd sat down and had been busy for the rest of the day. June had been upset for the rest of the day, and Alex had had to try and keep her company, at least, and the whole day had been hard. Mother's Day has been hard for the past few years, more about finding a semblance of family time than about actually celebrating their mom. But they've found some time today, and June's still smiling, and Leo looks proud and their mom doesn't seem to stressed. So, all in all, it could be worse.

2025, London, England

Tradition demands that they invite Mary to their Mother's Day brunch, so she is invited. She comes, and Alex thinks it might just be to spite them. But after the brunch, she's complaining about her joints. She goes back to Buckingham, and the Fox-Mountchirsten-Windsor children are urging them all into a van, sharing conspiratorial glances and grins as Philip talks to a driver and Bea pulls out a blindfold.

"Mum, we've got a surprise, so we're going to blindfold you after a bit, alright?" Catherine laughs and agrees, and Alex looks at Martha, who looks just as surprised as he is. Philip reveals a blindfold for her, too, arguing that since she's pregnant, she's technically a mother and deserves to be celebrated as one. Catherine agrees immediately, grinning at Martha. So, an hour and a half later, the moms are being blindfolded, but Alex is free to look out the window as the ban pulls into a small seaside town. They drive through it, stopping to park near a beach. Henry takes his mom's hands and Philip takes Martha's as Bea hands Alex a picnic basket, and they make their way to a picnic table on the beach before the blindfolds are removed. Catherine sees the picnic basket, and she grins.

"We... We thought maybe we could go for a hike, since that's what we always did growing up," Henry says.

“It’s not a long one, but Mazzy, if you’re not feeling up for it we’ll stay in town and enjoy the beach, or we can only go part way,” Philip says.

“Happy mother’s day, Mum. It… it’s good to have you back, and we love you,” Bea tells her.

"And you too, Martha. You're the best decision Philip ever made," Henry says, and Philip nods, wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her cheek, then the baby bump just starting to make an appearance against her shirt. They have a happy lunch, one where they're not all being careful to do things just right or keep an uptight grandmother happy. Then, Martha feels alright to hike, so she and Philip join them. They take things slowly, resting at a halfway point for Bea to play guitar and the six of them to take a break, Philip making sure Martha's doing alright and Henry passing out some of the treats Alex's family sent with him. And it's good. It's really, really good.

2025, Austin, Texas

Alex wakes up early on Mother's Day in his childhood home, wrapped around Henry in a bed that's probably too small for the two of them to share. He can hear June's alarm from across the hall, and he knows it's time. He presses a kiss to Henry's forehead, then gets up and meets June in the hall, both grinning. This is the first Mother’s Day where they get Regular Mom instead of President Mom, and they’re going to make it the best Mother’s Day yet.

Breakfast is routine by now; Alex starts pancake batter while June squeezes orange juice, then moves on to cooking eggs and bacon as Alex flips pancakes on the griddle. Henry wanders into the kitchen, talking on the phone as he wraps his arms around Alex. The coffee's ready, and there are three stacks of pancakes: blueberry, chocolate chip, and plain. Their mom will take one of each, and Leo will refuse anything but plain while Alex takes chocolate and June does blueberry. Alex wonders which one Henry will pick, thrilled that his boyfriend gets to join them. He's not sure who decided that England and the US should have different Mother's Days, but he's glad.

"Good morning," Henry says, hanging up and pressing a kiss to Alex's forehead.

"Morning. Things going alright at the shelter?" Henry's arranged to have moms who can't be with their kids visit the youth shelter today, to love the kids a little extra and get loved themselves. He’s left Pez in charge of it, and apparently, it’s all off to a good start.

When breakfast is ready, June brings over the tray with servings of eggs, bacon, juice, and coffee, complete with the yellow rose. Alex adds a plate of their mom's favorite pancakes, then he and Henry grab the rest of the food and bring it to their mom's room, where it's been Leo's job to make sure she actually relaxes this morning. She'd jumped into charity work the minute she left office, and they've all agreed she deserves to take a break for once. She doesn't know it, but she and Leo are going on vacation tomorrow, and he and the kids are refusing to let her bring any work with her. She’s been working for eight years straight; she deserves to relax for a bit.

She pretends to be surprised about the breakfast as the kids find spots around the room to settle down so they can eat together. Ellen's relaxed for the first Mother's Day in eight years, and she's going to spend the whole day with them for the first time in ages, if ever. They're planning on a day in, full of card and board games. Alex is going to help her grill for dinner, and they've all made a pact not to wear anything but pajamas all day. And, for the first time since she was president, Alex is convinced it's going to be a good Mother's Day.

On AO3

Notes:

Earlier today, I was like "yeah I kinda want to write a parent fic but I don't know", and then the discord chat (especially Gina over at @saltfics) was like "DO IT" and so I ignored my final essay and did this instead. -

Want to support the Hannah Makes Art fund? You can tip me a ko-fi here!

#rwrb #red white and royal blue #henry fox mountchristen windsor x alex claremont diaz #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #rwrb fic #my fic: rwrb #firstprince

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tragedy-for-sale · 4 years ago

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nonononono dont post fox angst pls i love him too much im gonna die give my boy all the love in the world he dESERVES IT

Well, you're in luck my friend, Fox isn't on the agenda as of late. He's currently enjoying some lemonade and cake, cause among endless love and hugs, he also deserves cake and lemonade. We're taking a pit-stop in the 501st for the time being.

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starbuck09256 · 6 years ago

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The bed you’ve made Part 2

Author Notes: I know I know I’m terrible person for not getting this out sooner. I’m so sorry. Life right? A huge thank you to @peacenik0 for fixing my terrible grammer and making sure this stays in character (grammer can slide but characterization is a big one for me). Thank you to all the wonderful peeps who said they wanted to read more, I love those notes and those totally fuel me through the day with positive energy. Ok so stop rambling and post the dang fic!

the ivf works but Mulder is sleeping with Diana.

Part 1 https://starbuck09256.tumblr.com/post/183232727829/the-bed-youve-made Part 2 The bed you’ve made

Scully leaves quickly with another chaste kiss on his cheek. That smile of hers is going to be imprinting on his brain. His cheek still tingles from her kisses. His penis still limp from his escapades with Diana. He closes the door. Letting his head rest against the oak door. Fuck he thinks. Diana says nothing gathering her things. The bra shoved under the side of his couch. She looks at him with those cold eyes of hers, he once thought he could seek solace in them, the darkness wrapping him up in a warm cocoon. What the fuck is he doing? What does he do? He told Scully, he fucking told her he didn’t want to change anything. How does a .002% chance work? He thinks of all the times she’s saved his ass, going to the north pole, pulling him out of that shit camper in the middle of nowhere, when they tried to upload him into a simulation. That’s how it works, every time they have a .002% chance of survival and somehow, someway, those odds are in their favor.

Diana stands silently waiting for him to break the tension in the room, with not the impatient sigh he is used to from Scully, not an accusatory tone or doubt creeping into her voice. Diana isn’t like Scully, not in looks, not in spirit, not in mind. After a few short years together, Mulder has seen inside Diana’s mind, she is cold and calculating in a way that shocked him at first. She showed him how simple it is to care and not care all at the same time. That people care only for themselves in that moment, and only if those feelings will benefit them long term.

Diana doesn't bring any feelings into this, she probably didn’t have any the first time either, now that he thinks about it in a rational way. But she did have the intelligence, his weakness is smart women, women like Scully, Phoebe, not that they are anything alike. But damn if smart isn’t the sexiest thing to him. DIana is no exception to this so smart in execution, in planning, in every last detail. She doesn’t believe in .002% chances. She works each system and finds each loophole, each small flaw and strikes to her full advantage. She took the x-files because they were never going to give them back to him. Used her own leverage to play both sides. At least that's what she has told him. Another way to steer him towards her own agenda, he wanted to believe so bad that she came back for them, that one day after she had left and he felt destroyed that she would put him back together again the way the x-files had done the first time. She knew, god, she knew that he would do anything to keep the things that make him feel validated. Originally it was her, validating his beliefs that the paranormal might really be an explanation for it all, that the answers were hidden for them to find together, now she was using the same idea to keep them for herself. Anger had raged through him when he found out she had been assigned and not him and Scully. “fox, they weren't going to hand them back to you. After everything we went through to get them in the first place? Shouldn't at least one of us have them?” Almost like Scully in rationalizing her position. Scully doesn't rationalize being a traitor, stealing something away from him. Scully would fight tooth and nail for injustice. But scully like him doesn't have the files, Diana is holding them hostage. Using his love of mystery and intrigue to keep him close to her, keep him invested in their fucked up version of fuck buddies. She lets him hack into Spenders files, she brings over a case file while wearing lingerie in his favorite color. What is her end game here? Split him up from Scully?

His precious Scully does she have lingerie like this deep navy with lace edges? Would Scully let him use her to his own selfish ends? Is he any better than the supposed man who is his real father? Using women to meet his own selfish needs, playing the odds to propel his own cause? IS he any better than Diana? Hasn’t he used his own mind games on Scully? Keeping her with him by using her own love for him against herself? He pulled that card in the hallway. Manipulated her feelings for him to give her false hope? Was it really false? Was he not working out some hidden desire to have his cake and eat it too? Have Scully and the x-files? What should he do now? Should he say nothing? Pray that Scully doesn’t come back, that she didn’t see the bra. That elation has blinded her extraordinary investigator skills, and buys him some time. He needs time. Diana touches his arm, it’s brief non-threatening, Diana is too good at this, good at making things seem as they are, pretending there is no deep agenda. He looks up at her, losing himself again in pools of black with specs of gold.

“I’ll see you later,” her voice soft and void of any emotion.

He use to love that about her, that she could separate herself so effortlessly. Scully shows emotion, she has rage and pain, fear and anger, and as of just now she has joy and love. How could he get involved with two women at the same time, after having no one for six years? The world is cruel. He swallows hard opening the door for her to step out into the hallway. The hallway he almost kissed Scully. A kiss that luckily ended, because it was out of desperation, desperation to keep her by his side. Isn't that what he is doing with Diana now, using sex as a desperate plea for her to give him access?

Diana slips past, there is no kiss goodbye, no acknowledgement of what has happened. He groans as closes the door. He’s not sure what the next steps are, he’s not sure he wants to know. He thinks maybe sleep to use his dreams to once again answer his questions. Maybe that’s what has been going on now, he’s been dreaming of Scully, dreaming of a life together. Does he really want that? Or is he trying compensate for his own guilt? A life he doesn’t want or need, a life that might cost him the only thing Diana thinks he cares about. A child though is different, it's an answer he hasn't wanted to ask. What's at the end of the road? Where does this end and how badly does it hurt?

He is lucky, the weekend passes quickly, Scully doesn’t show up again unannounced. She gives him space, he isn’t sure that it’s good, he figures that his luck has clearly run out. She knows about Diana, and she is taking her time to come up with a way to let him out. But now all he thinks about is a daughter with her eyes, a son with his nose. A child with a stubborn loyalty who will be far too smart for their own good. He still doesn’t know what to do, what to say. Does he go to the appointments? Will he get to hear his childs heartbeat in her body. Will he be there to cut the cord? Will she let him? Does he want her to? Does he give up his quest, his crusade and lose sight of justice? What if he does, what if he gives it up and in 5 or 10 years it all shatters anyway because he didn’t bother to stop it? That the day comes while he is sitting in a parent teacher conference discussing why his child already knows how to dissect worms and speak Klingon. But the aliens knocking at the door are where the real fear should lie?

He groans pulling on his running shoes for the third time today. Maybe exhaustion will win out? Maybe their child will love the feel of the wind rushing pass as the sounds of their footfall hit the earth in cadence.

It’s Monday morning. He feels better, he has a plan he is going to play it cool. Take a play out of the Diana book. This is Scullys’ call, she can be the one to tell him what she’s looking for, what she wants from him, and he can hope that saying yes was enough, that she understood this was her decision and while he wants her to be happy he also won’t sacrifice himself. He brings Scully her favorite coffee and a blueberry scone. He wants to see that smile again, the one that lit up her whole face when she told him. He wants to feel her happiness radiating through his body, it’s almost as good as an x-file.

Diana is an issue though, one that he can’t ignore. The file she slipped him yesterday was thrilling, a new case filled with his favorite things. Diana plays games in a way that makes phoebe look like a novice, she’s said nothing of seeing Scully as his house or the conversation, she left and only met him yesterday to give him a breadcrumb but still kissed him deeply. She is playing the same game as him, the wait and see if it works out game. Wait to let Fox fuck it up to let his guard slide. He wonders if this will be the catalyst for her to slip up as well. Will he finally see what her end game is? She was always a master at chess. When they met Gibson all he could think about is how Diana could beat him. Was this the surprised move that will make the queen fall. Will she need to sacrifice herself?

The crowded bullpen of agents on phones as fingers fly across keyboards, he steers clear trying to navigate the cramp quarters. Chatter reaching into his brain makes him miss the basement; the quiet mornings of coffee and crullers especially the sound of the slides clicking through the spindle.There she is in his favorite blue shirt, the one that makes her eyes sparkle slightly more her hair shine so brightly. Has she always looked so breathtaking? Has he been so consumed that he never bothered to notice?

Scully smiles and blushes all at once at him. He can’t help but smile back at her holding up the treats. As he walks to her desk, Mulder wonders what new literal crap Kersh has shoved down their throats this week. She looks up at him. Her eyes shining and her skin glowing in the terrible fluorescent lights.

“Hi,” she chuckles still blushing. You’d think she spent the whole weekend sprawled out in his bed.

“Hey,.. I uh brought you coffee.” he mutters she looks up at him. Has she always smiled like that? Has it always made his heart melt like this. Is he sure this is a good idea? Can he really try to play it cool with her? The only person who sees through him like no one else?

“Is it ummm… decaf?” she whispers the last word. He is confused, they’ve had numerous discussions of decaf coffee being the most pointless thing on the planet, there is a time and place for decaf coffee; and that is never and in the trash. Her hand reaches out to his brushing it briefly.

“Let’s umm go for a quick walk huh? The fresh air will be good.” He follows her as she walks around a desk trying to look incompiscous but running into the edge of the table, biting her lip and groaning. He wants to reach out to her but she shakes her head. She points to the scone left in it’s little white bag on her desk. “Bring the scone, I’m starving.” he grabs it quickly as they head out.

They are sitting on the bench at the mall. The one they always sit at and debate flukeman and AI, where they’ve made the list of people they would come back and haunt if such things are possible. Kersh now in the top five for both of them. She is looking around nervously. He’s nervous too, he isn’t sure what to do, what they are. Why she would ever want to drink decaf? She reaches into the bag and takes a big hunk of scone. Originally he thought they would share like they always do but she is already ripping another large piece off as the sugar crystals scatter across her lips, oh pregnant right . He smiles softly.

“Sorry,” she mumbles between bites covering her mouth with her hand. He sighs looking around at the reflecting pool thinking of a time in this same place not so long ago when Diana said she needed to go to Europe to pursue their joint interest. A temporary assignment to find out what they knew from the inside. He wonders if that is what is going on now, or if the years have molded her resolve to their own agenda.

Scully’s warm hand lands on his arm. Bringing him back to the present. The cherry blossoms are blooming framing them on this small bench with years of meetings.

“where did you go?” her voice curious.

“just thinking about all the times we've sat on this bench.” he smiles at her, his inner struggles aside.

She takes a small sip of her coffee. “I'm going to miss this,” she gestures to the coffee. “no full lead for 9 months.” he shallows hard staring out at the reflection of blossoms dancing in the wind. “Mulder, I know it's a lot to process, and honestly I know that I probably took advantage of our unique relationship in asking you.” he waits trying to still play it cool as her fingertips grip his. She didn't take advantage he did, he agreed to something trying to keep a balance and now he's so unsure if he can handle the consequences. He wants to run away like when he was 12.

“What are you looking for here, Dana?” he knows he shouldn't use those words. He knows he is the one that brought this shit show home to roost. She sighs but doesn't release his hand. She is warm anchoring him here like she always has. He rubs his face with his free hand. He doesn't want to pull away from her.

“Ideally?” she asks, hesitant. He feels the nervous energy around them. It's so different now, they've never been really nervous with one another. He turns looks at her, as she licks her lips as she moves her head back to regard him fully.

“yea ideally.” He is curious. She used medical reasons to justify asking him, used her concerns of tampering as another. She takes a big breath. Breathing out slowly and biting her lip. He feels her anxiety, it's washing over her in waves.

“I would… god this is so hard.” She deflates closing her eyes. She turns fully pulling their hands into her lap. He laughs a little, his surefire partner who backs down from nothing. He reaches up touching her chin smiling at her urging her to continue. He needs these answers before he can deal with everything else. Where are we going with this Scully? What do you need? What can I do? What should I do? Direct me because I’ve done a terrible fucking job doing what I what. He hopes she answers his pleas. Hopes she understand that he needs more guidance than ever right now.

“I want you involved in… well everything as much as you want to be” a smiles plays at her lips.

He sits back surprised.

“I would love it if you could be at the big appointments at least, maybe hold my hand.” She says sheepishly. “I'm scared, i have no idea how to do this and you always..”

She licks her lips again before swallowing hard. “you always center me, make me feel brave.”

He chuckles at her. He centers her, of all the things he has said and done he never imagined he made anyone feel centered. He sits back. He needs to think about what he wants needs to reassess. He needs time.

“when is your next appointment? And um what is it for?” his voice sounds stronger than he feels

She grins. “it's umm Thursday at 3 for the first ultrasound. It's umm a big one, we should be able to hear a heartbeat,” she finishes with a whisper.

He nods he stands up pulls her up with him. Tucks a strand of bright red hair behind her ear.

“I'll be there,”

that megawatt smile is back “really?” she questions, of course she does, she is Dana Scully but he sees the joy shining through her.

“yea, I want to be there for that,” he says smiling.

She has tears in her eyes and she wraps her arms around him. Hugging him fiercely. She pulls back and kisses him. He hesitates but her lips are full and tender. She must sense his hesitation because she pulls back quickly. Muttering a sorry as she picks up the trash.

“sorry, that I'm just..” She trails off embarrassed. He is too.

“We should get back.” he mutters she nods. He follows her out of the park, but doesn't place his hand on her back. He has just complicated the shit out of his life. His phone rings and he remembers lunch with Diana a new source a new file, a quick fuck at her house. He tells scully in a scruffy voice.

“I have to take this, I'll see you later,” she nods turning quickly.

He knows she saw the name, and the look on her face proves she did see the bra on his floor. She knows he's with Diana. His lips still tingle with sweet sugar from her kiss and he isn't sure how to breathe anymore. As he watches her walk away he sees her shoulders slum as the elation from moments ago brushed off, and defeat takes over her familiar stride.

I’m not leaving it like this promise.

Tagging the peeps who asked and some extras :)

@scully-eats-sushi @contrivedcoincidences6 @knuffelkontje @tngbabe @danaedaniels @itsclaucueva @sandymans-world @lappina @postmodernpromartheus @missmelimelis0900 @foxystarbucks @skinny-gillian @gwensghosts @wendyi111 @peacenik0 @monaiargancoconutsoy @marinafrenzy @improlificinsarcasm @today-in-fic

#mulder and scully #s6 #msr #ust #msr fanfic #thebedyouvemade #part 2 #my fic

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yougotmyshareofit · 5 years ago

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January Book Reviews

So I inhaled a lot of books in January despite school starting back up again (not good for my productivity that’s for sure), so I thought I’d give some quick book reviews on them because a lot of them were real winners.

1. Ziggy, Stardust, and Me // By: James Brandon

Ok this book was absolutely beautiful. After finishing it, I couldn’t do anything but sit there completely in awe. The characters are amazingly written and the author portrays the difficulties of being LGBTQ+ as well as a person of color in the ‘70s with such cutting emotion. It brings up a lot of issues and prejudices that were prevalent at that time, which was really enlightening. All in all, it was probably my favorite book out of all of them this month and I couldn’t recommend it enough.

Summary: “ The year is 1973.... And homosexuality is still officially considered a mental illness. In the midst of these trying times is sixteen-year-old Jonathan Collins, a bullied, anxious, asthmatic kid, who aside from an alcoholic father and his sympathetic neighbor and friend Starla, is completely alone. To cope, Jonathan escapes to the safe haven of his imagination, where his hero David Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust and dead relatives, including his mother, guide him through the rough terrain of his life. In his alternate reality, Jonathan can be anything: a superhero, an astronaut, Ziggy Stardust, himself, or completely “normal” and not a boy who likes other boys. When he completes his treatments, he will be normal—at least he hopes. But before that can happen, Web stumbles into his life. Web is everything Jonathan wishes he could be: fearless, fearsome and, most importantly, not ashamed of being gay. Jonathan doesn’t want to like brooding Web.... But he’s drawn to Web anyway. Web is the first person in the real world to see Jonathan completely and think he’s perfect..... For the first time in his life, he may finally feel free enough to love and accept himself as he is. ”

2. Something like Gravity // By: Amber Smith

This book was pretty heart-wrenching and also very beautiful. I liked how real and honest the author was at portraying Chris’s struggles with being out as transgender and the amount of trust he had to have to open up to Maia. It was a lovely story that showed that someone can be in your life for a short amount of time, but still change it in ways you never thought were possible. Highly recommend as well.

Summary: “Chris and Maia aren’t off to a great start. A near-fatal car accident first brings them together, and their next encounters don’t fare much better.... But they’re neighbors, at least for the summer, and despite their best efforts, they just can’t seem to stay away from each other. The path forward isn’t easy. Chris has come out as transgender, but he’s still processing a frightening assault he survived the year before. Maia is grieving the loss of her older sister and trying to find her place in the world without her. Falling in love was the last thing on either of their minds. But would it be so bad if it happened anyway?”

3. Frat Girl // By: Kiley Roache

So this book was a pretty entertaining and humorous read. I really liked the trope that the author used -- a feminist girl dealing with all the crap that goes down in a frat house. It was also pretty enlightening for me and showed the different sides of feminism, as well as struck down lots of stereotypes that both feminists and anti-feminists have, which was really cool and interesting. Although I enjoyed this book, at times I felt that I was just reading the same scene over again, so I feel like the author could’ve been more concise. However, I still liked it a lot and thought it was an entertaining read.

Summary: “For Cassandra Davis, the F-word is fraternity—specifically Delta Tau Chi, a house on probation and on the verge of being banned from campus. Accused of offensive, sexist behavior, they have one year to clean up their act. For the DTC brothers, the F-word is feminist—the type of person who writes articles in the school paper about why they should lose their home. With one shot at a scholarship to attend the university of her dreams, Cassie pitches a research project: to pledge Delta Tau Chi and provide proof of their misogynistic behavior. They’re frat boys. She knows exactly what to expect once she gets there. Exposing them should be a piece of cake. But the boys of Delta Tau Chi have their own agenda, and fellow pledge Jordan Louis is certainly more than the tank top wearing “bro” Cassie expected to find. With her heart and her future tangled in the web of her own making, Cassie is forced to realize that the F-word might not be as simple as she thought after all.”

4. I wish you all the best // By: Mason Deaver

UGH THIS BOOK!! I inhaled it in literally less than 24 hours and I LOVED it. Classic angst (like a lot of angst) with a happy ending and it was so so good. Definitely a close second for my favorite this month. I just loved all the raw emotion that the author portrayed and how real they were with the mental and emotional struggles the characters faced. So amazing, highly recommend.

Summary: “When Ben De Backer comes out to their parents as nonbinary, they're thrown out of their house and forced to move in with their estranged older sister, Hannah, and her husband, Thomas, whom Ben has never even met. Struggling with an anxiety disorder compounded by their parents' rejection, they come out only to Hannah, Thomas, and their therapist and try to keep a low profile in a new school. But Ben's attempts to survive the last half of senior year unnoticed are thwarted when Nathan Allan, a funny and charismatic student, decides to take Ben under his wing. As Ben and Nathan's friendship grows, their feelings for each other begin to change, and what started as a disastrous turn of events looks like it might just be a chance to start a happier new life.”

5. All for the Game Series (The Foxhole Court, The Raven King, and All the King’s Men) // By: Nora Sakavic

So I downloaded these as ebooks on my iPad, which turned out to be a terrible idea because they ruined my productivity at school for a literal week. A. WEEK. Basically I would read these in class rather than pay attention, but you know whatever it’s fine I’m fine. Anyways, I loved this series so so much. I wil say that the first book was good, but kind of confusing for me because there were so many different names and backstories that I literally could not keep track of all of them. However, it gets better as the series goes on and I inhaled all 3 of these books pretty quickly. I loved the main characters and even though the backstories were kind of confusing at times, they also made the plot super interesting and intricate so I guess you win some and you lose some. All in all, you gotta read this series cuz it has all the best trope and there’s lots of angst (seriously SO much) and lots of mystery. Good stuff.

Summary (book 1): “Neil Josten is the newest addition to the Palmetto State University Exy team. He's short, he's fast, he's got a ton of potential—and he's the runaway son of the murderous crime lord known as The Butcher. Signing a contract with the PSU Foxes is the last thing a guy like Neil should do. The team is high profile and he doesn't need sports crews broadcasting pictures of his face around the nation. His lies will hold up only so long under this kind of scrutiny and the truth will get him killed. But Neil's not the only one with secrets on the team. One of Neil's new teammates is a friend from his old life, and Neil can't walk away from him a second time. Neil has survived the last eight years by running. Maybe he's finally found someone and something worth fighting for. ”

#seriously tho read these guys #they were all so good #also sorry for the long post #like yikes man #january book recs #book recs #recommended #recommendations #books #reading #lgbtq #book recommendations #book reviews #book review #review

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cuddleslutloki · 6 years ago

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I have a genuine question. How often do you actually deal with antis? I've been following you for a bit now and it seems every so often you bring up antis. I've certainly kept my interest about thorki shut and locked away in a box from my friends for the simple fact that all of them think it's incest. It's not an easy topic of conversation but you just seem to handle all the antis so well? Also on an off note about beast!Thor, his favorite pass time must just be rutting into Loki 24/7 🤔

when someone tells you that you're romanticizing abuse [bc i made a stockholm moodboard for a fic] I don't know what I'm supposed to say other than I don't condone it but I write about it? Is writing about abusive relationships bad in writing??? you're the only person i ask for advice so thank you for anything in advance

i’m honestly really glad you came to me. i really do like discussing this topic in this kind of way bc i’ll never reblog an anti or answer an anti ask. even if you’re arguing against them, i don’t think it’s worth it to argue against them if it means also spreading what they’re saying

the basic premise of all anti behavior and ideology is censorship. that’s all it is.

“i don’t like this topic, you need to stop writing it and making art for it. if you don’t stop there will be consequences.”

that is censorship and that is the kind of shit fandom has had to fight ever since there’s been fandom. women, poc, lgbt+ folks have been dealing with people telling us what we can and can’t write and enjoy for... well, probably forever. but we’re still here, creating the kind of content we want to see and indulge in.

as far as how to deal with antis, my advice is to ignore, ignore, ignore. they want what any bully wants: attention

you stop paying attention, you stop giving them time they don’t deserve from you, they’ll die off. there’s no point in fighting them directly. produce the content you want to see and enjoy what you want to enjoy. drown them out. you don’t owe them a response just because they come to you. they don’t have any qualms about being rude to you, so be rude back and just ignore them. i love blocking antis, personally. take out the garbage, y’know?

antis use the words ship and support as synonyms because they think that shipping is some radical call to action for lgbt rep instead of entertainment

shipping is not activism. shipping is about entertainment and enjoyment, nothing more

so this is why i have this very blasé attitude about antis. i just don’t give a fuck about them beyond making posts trashing their idiocy. because that’s what it is. it’s idiocy, but going deeper it’s puritanism at its finest. antis use fox news scare tactic logic under the guise of some pseudo feminist agenda because they don’t understand and don’t want to understand that enjoying dark fiction as entertainment isn’t equivalent to some greater moral stance

they use the same argument about shipping and fanfiction that WASP moms use against video games and loud music: that enjoying and consuming it will make you think it’s normal and there’s nothing wrong with it irl

okay, well, vlad the impaler never played CoD or far cry and caligula never watched hentai but we know why i’m bringing them up in this context without even heading over to wikipedia, don’t we?

they use the words abuse and pedophilia waaaaaayy too liberally and they’re doing more harm than good because they’re twisting and warping words that should have very specific meanings by using them so goddamn vaguely and irresponsibly

my own personal theory is that these people are terrified that if they don’t yell in opposition to these topics 24/7 and actively attack content creators that they’d probably enjoy it, and they’ve been so programmed by the echo chamber of tumblr and twitter that they think this means they’re bad people.

spoiler alert: that’s not what it means

i literally watched a circle jerk on twitter where screenshots of some mafia starker au got tweeted and retweeted w/ pictures of someone pouring bleach into cereal and people had asked to see more of the post. if you really don’t like something, you shouldn’t hate-read about it. it’s not productive, it does more harm than good if that’s the actual issue rather than some reverse psychology-style enjoyment they’re probably getting out of it.

they claim to hate this shit so much, but they’re reading hundreds and thousands of words and putting these images in their heads of their own free will. i don’t do that with shit i genuinely dislike. i avoid it.

i see antis say they enjoy thorki fanart because they think it’s cute, then they see it’s tagged thorki and they have an over the top reaction because the nature of anti ideology states you should never enjoy something like that, so if you do then you have to make the excuse of ignorance to prove that you’re still innocent and pure. enjoyment is apologism to them because they aren’t content to simply attack fan creators, they want to try and drive away the people who consume our art as well because they know you’re the cornerstone of fandom. consumers are why creators create. yeah, i write because i enjoy it, but i also write to connect to my readers and have people commenting on my fics when they like them.

it’s also worth noting that antis only ever talk about shipping. they only talk about sexual and romantic ships. i’ve never seen an anti talk about (often extreme) levels of violence in canon source material for the ships and characters they want to froth at the mouth over.

seeing someone bleed out and choking on their own blood after being stabbed or shot or bludgeoned? meh

seeing a character who was once a child have a sexual thought about a character who was also once a child and is also their close friend? omg why are we trying to make fandom unsafe for people?

personally, i’ve also noticed that fandoms with darker canon material tend to have more chill fandoms most of the time. i think it also depends on the average age in a given fandom. there’s a major difference between fannibals and steven universe fans, let’s just say that.

creating a moodboard for a dark fic is not “romanticizing abuse” and at this point antis honestly have no fucking idea what that phrase is. they use those words the way a bored CEO uses social media buzzwords and hashtags in a staff meeting

if antis want to see true romanticizing of abuse then they can go to serial killer thirst tags and spot the fucking differences between shippers and people who forget that ted bundy was weak, flaccid, cowardly piece of shit

writing something dark or violent or whatever else and condoning the act or doing the act are different. this is why stephen king isn’t under government surveillance or in prison.

make no mistake, this anti shit only applies to fandom. they’re attacking creators here because creators out at the professional levels don’t give a fuck. they’ve tried, and they’ve failed.

creators at the professional level understand something antis don’t: that being able to reconcile your enjoyment of dark media can be a sign of emotional intelligence and good emotional health. it’s cathartic. it’s allowed to be cathartic.

the most common consumers of dark fiction are members of minority communities and people who’ve been emotionally and/or sexually repressed for one reason or another.

antis want to say that fiction doesn’t exist in a vacuum and they are 100% correct! because writing fanfiction and original fiction that relates to parts of my life that nearly killed me gives me control over something that was beyond me in the original context. writing about fucked up codependent, violent romance allows me to process my shit in a way that’s healthy and produces something fun and enjoyable.

my therapist knows i ship thorki, she knows i write thorki. i’ve had her read pieces of fanfiction i’ve written in addition to pieces of original fiction. y’know what she said? “wow, baylen, that’s vivid. you have a way with words!”

i read her a line out of smart boy and told her what the story was about and this trained professional said “well it’s a productive way to process some emotion that you clearly need to let out”

but you know what? if someone doesn’t have the trauma i have? let them write it, too! let them create and enjoy the fictional content they want! more cake, y’all!

finally getting around to one of the first parts of your ask, lol. thorki is incest. thor and loki are brothers. they were raised believing they were blood brothers, even. loki being adopted doesn’t change a thousand years of personal history where thor looked at loki and thought that they came out of the same woman, y’know?

that’s his brother and in the comics his attachment to loki is even more intense. the mcu nerfed that shit. loki’s life has been intrinsically tied to thor’s ability to feel a full sense of joy.

enjoying an incest ship isn’t some sign of moral depravity. writing abusive relationships isn’t bad. gone girl was made into an award winning movie. art should look like life, and sometimes life fucking sucks. dark stories, sad stories, fucked up holy shit idk if i can go to sleep after i read this stories exist for a reason. we need them. we have to have an outlet for our frustration, our anger, and especially our fear.

so which is the healthier option of these

to write up a piece of fanfiction where two siblings are in love in a way that might be cute and soft or might be destructive, depending on your mood?

attacking strangers you don’t know online and threatening violence against anyone who doesn’t think like you do?

i know what kind of person i want to be.

ship and let ship, thanks for reading my doctoral thesis office hours are always

#anon #baylen chats

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twowritingdisasters · 6 years ago

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Sin City: Foxtrot

Chapter One

The media, like the muckrakers of old, picked up on the presence of a new player in the city’s eternal struggle between human and Inhuman almost immediately. Green mask, they said, untamable ivy, impossibly fast with eyes that glowed amber. Hellbent, some claimed, on Inhuman domination, while others insisted that he only meant to use his cursed powers to defend the hellhole of crime and prejudice that their home had become. Even the Inhuman population was divided, some cheering him on while others groused that he was only turning more people against them. Either way, Sloth was growing in infamy and seemingly growing in power and confidence on top of it, hiding in the shadows less and stopping both rabid, wild Inhumans and cruel, Inhuman-loathing agents of law enforcement.

Ban Volpin wanted absolutely no part in it. The shadows were where he thrived and he was doing fine in them, thank you very much. Thieves were meant to avoid the spotlight, and he was the best thief there was, which meant avoiding Sloth. Unfortunately, Sloth himself seemed to have other ideas, and, being the complete and utter bastard Ban would soon discover he was, he seemingly became intent on dragging him into this...bizarre crusade.

It began--as things usually did with Ban--when he tried to pickpocket a kid walking some shaggy mutt. Slipping his wallet out of the pocket of his hoodie was easy, and Ban hummed with delight as he flipped it open, reading name printed neatly on the inside. Harlequin, huh...that’s a damn unfortunate name if I’ve ever heard one. “Ah, crap,” he muttered, flipping through it; no driver’s license, no credit card, no identification other than the name. Like me, he thought, and bit back an irritated curse. Like us. Like all the Inhumans. He almost wanted to go back to return the wallet, but hey, a thief had to make a living somehow. He could probably rip off the label, pawn it somewhere--ooh, there were a few twenties in there, could probably buy him a steak at some slightly-better-than-shitty restaurant, wouldn’t that be nice--

“Hey.”

He turned, glanced down and met the amber-eyed glare of the kid he’d pickpocketed moments ago. Fucking shit. He flipped the wallet shut, tilting his head nonchalantly down at him. “Whaddya want?” The wallet wasn’t worth fighting over; there wasn’t much in it, but if the kid asked, he’d hand it back. No point in outing himself as an Inhuman over sixty bucks and some cheap fake leather.

To his surprise, the kid--Harlequin, whatever--smiled. Smirked, really, his mouth twisting wickedly at the corners as he hummed low in his throat, sounding amused. “You’re one of us, aren’t you?”

“Excuse me?”

In answer, the kid’s sclerae suddenly flashed amber, the iris darkening, and the dying weeds sprouting out of the cracked concrete flared with vitality. He hovered a few inches off the ground before dropping to the sidewalk again. Inhuman. Figures. “It’s been awhile since anyone’s been able to steal from me. You’re a good thief.”

Ban scoffed. “Look, if you want your wallet back, ya don’t have to resort to this...bullshit, alright?” He gestured aimlessly at him with one hand, tossed back the wallet with the other. “You caught me, it’s fine. No flattery necessary~”

“Is it flattery if it’s true?” The boy’s eyes glinted. “I mean, you seem annoying. And like kind of a dick. But you’d be useful, too...”

Well, fuck, that was a sentence Ban absolutely loathed. “I’m not here to be used by anyone, fuckwit,” he snapped, turning to stalk away. “Much less some brat who thinks they know shit about me.”

He got about five steps down before something slammed into his side, throwing him into an alley; he snarled, lashing out at whatever it was before swearing as it sliced up his hand. The injury sealed up quickly, as usual--unkillable and all that--but the annoyance of it made him curl his lip as he clawed at it and struggled. Fuck it, he found himself hissing mentally, extending his hand toward the bastard as he called on his power.

Locating his opponent’s energy was easy, sapping it even simpler. He grinned wickedly as he dodged a blow from the bastard’s knives--knives, really? Against a thief? Ha, amateur. There might’ve been a lot of those damn ninja blades (ugh, he was starting to get an inkling of who this fucker was...), but with his agility boosted and his adversary’s slowed, avoiding them all was a piece of cake. Any wounds that were left sealed up in seconds, the spatters of blood on the glass-covered ground the only signs he’d been wounded.

Unfortunately, the bastard didn’t have any physical strength he could sap at all--goddamn weakling relying on his powers all the time--but there was plenty of speed and strength in his gift, and he slowly drained that all away, grinning as the swarm of knives slowed to a halt, the boy dropping to the ground with a gasp of exhaustion. The knives coalesced into a--a freaking pillow?--swooping underneath the kid as he collapsed--and why the fuck was he still grinning? “Knew you were good.”

Ban scowled at him, flexing his hand as power thrummed around it. “And why the fuck does it matter to you?”

His grin faded, flattened to a sharp scowl. “Because the Daimonas Corporation has plans--for the city, for the world, for everything. And their plans aren’t exactly good, either.”

Daimonas Corporation, plant control, shifting weapons...oh fuck, he’s-- “You’re Sloth.” It wasn’t a question, and the kid--Sloth--tilted his head toward him with arched eyebrows. “Then what--”

“The Daimonas Corporation is planning to create an Inhuman army.” The words came out in a rush, as though he’d been waiting to tell someone. “I’ve been trying to stop them, but I can never get close enough, never get proof, and the cops aren’t gonna do shit. Even as Sloth, I can’t fight that many rogue Inhumans on my own, don’t have the skills to get to their information, but you--you’re a thief, a good one, and you don’t steal from people who can’t afford it. Plus, you’re an Inhuman, which gives you a stake in this already.”

Fucking-- The Daimonas Corporation, better known as the Demon Clan on the streets, were like the bogeymen of the Inhuman population. At least half of them had been attacked, experimented on, or used in some way by them, and the other half had at least ten close calls between them. An army of controlled, brainwashed Inhumans wasn’t a stretch, and after what they’d done to Killia…

We’ll save her, they’d said when he’d brought her to them, out of other options. He’d pleaded with them--don’t attack her, she’s not like me, she’s normal--but they’d taken her blood, used her until there was nothing left, killed her and tossed out her body for him to find later.

He wanted nothing to do with those bastards ever again. “And why the fuck should I join your crusade?”

Sloth didn’t answer, only blinked seriously at him. “One night patrol, just one. And if you’re not on board, I’ll let you walk.” He extended his hand. “I’ll even let you keep the cash.”

It was a bad deal, a shitty idea, and Ban knew he should walk away, knew he should turn and leave. What else could this kid give him, anyway? Who knew if he was even telling the truth?

But Ban clasped Sloth’s hand in his, meet his eyes before letting them flash red briefly, the sclerae changing shades as he activated his power for a brief second, letting the added agility flow out of him. “Ya drive a hard bargain, Sloth.”

The kid grinned again. “Call me King.”

One patrol turned into five, then ten, then a nightly rotation, the new red-armored vigilante fighting alone just as often as he fought in tandem with Sloth. A new name began making its rounds throughout the human and Inhuman communities--Fox. Quick, clever, and unfailingly deadly, Fox’s easygoing, joking manner grew in fame far more quickly than Sloth’s icy anger and sarcasm, the scarlet-masked hero even gaining a few fans. People remarked on his greed, his strange deftness and accuracy for a man of his build, wondered whether he really followed Sloth’s agenda or whether he had a different purpose entirely. Support for the heroes had begun to grow even in the human community, mostly among the young, and the Inhumans were nearly entirely for them.

Ban glanced at his reflection in a diner window and snorted softly, hands wrapped around a mug of coffee. Fox. His eyes glittered scarlet as he gazed out across the road, at the sleek, imposing building rising above his city, the letters D.C. flashing on it. The Demons had already released a statement condemning them, and most of the humans stood against them already, armed with prejudice and privilege.

Good. He stirred sugar into his coffee, and grinned--a fast, foxlike smirk. Let the war begin.

#nnt #nanatsu no taizai #Sin City Series #ban the undead #fairy king harlequin #the demon clan #vigilante au

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inappropriatefangirlneeds · 8 years ago

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Gotham s3ep12 “Ghosts” Personal Review

“Okay. Weird” .. “But not illegal.” Warning spoilers below

“Please don´t leave just yet” BRUCE WAYNE says to Mrs. Kyle. Before that the ornament OWL gets examined, the one they stole and people died for. And yes I do very much like to know why this thing is so important as well and thank you Gotham that might have been the most interesting seconds of this plot: Bruce puts the owl aside and sun shines on it, revealing a map or something. I´m curious! Better be useful, Luka died for that. Anyway it´s all about SELINA KYLE´s mother who was an orphan and left at the same step as she did leave Selina and now tries to make up for over a decade of neglect. Selina is not having it she is angry. Her mother brings a box to the Wayne Manor that they should give her daughter and omg Bruce is so precious in this, he tell her to stay and try reaching out once more! Well done Bruce! He brings mother and box to Selina and they hug. They all have dinner and get along well. Daughter and mother bond over robbing Alfred and it´s glorious. It feels like a happy family and I really like that but why do I got a bad feeling about this.. Bad feeling gets some fodder when Selina accompanies her mother going into her hotel room. Some guy wants money. At first I thought Mrs. Kyle might work together with that guy but she does seem truly worried? Selina is quick to offer Bruce´s money. Like when did that happen, at first she did not even take the offer of a shower and warm place to stay now she is spending his money. Okay it´s not for her but someone else but still. Mother says this is her past and that the Wayne boys should be warned because they are not to be messed with .. Dear, ALFRED PENNYWORTH is really into Mrs. Kyle, and .. really?! .. I thought he would look down on her just as much as he does on Selina and despise her, but then again both are horrible with the parent role so maybe that connects?

“Let the vultures have at me.” Okay now I do call bullshit how does OSWALD COBBLEPOT not know that he has been doing good for the city. He seemed to have been involved as much that he knew he was doing good for the mob interests he gotta know that stuff at least some tendency. Like yes, he did not know how to do the bar thing with Butch but now I´m starting to get annoyed. Once he finally gets the memo that things are alright he is all smiling and “How´s my hair” and that´s more the penguin I want to see. Also for fox sake can´t they have him be happy for more than a second. They just throw shit at him that keeps piling, this is not fun anymore. Being mayor could have been so great and good for him why always skip that stuff. Anyway TARQUIN, deputy chief of staff elegantly offers his assistance and also arranges some national TV interview. Meanwhile “someone” digs up Elijah van Dahl´s corpse and gets spooky. Oswald´s sanity certificate shatters, how symbolic. Oswald sees his dead father wandering around and even warning him about a birthday boy that should not be trusted. Tarquin gets some birthday cake and Oswald finds a corpse in a bag, one thing leads to another. Tarquin gets murdered. “You are a sick man! What are you plotting? What's the angle? Who are you in on this with?” Yes Oswald that´s what you should be asking but honey, dead people can´t give you answers. I feel sorry for the both of them, this is a mess. Oswald thus is late for his TV interview, which of course can only take place in this mere moment, but makes it “Sorry I´m late, mayor stuff”. TV lady told him she is no fan of him and wow she really isn´t, she suggests Oswald murdered his family to inherit the money. NO! You don´t do that lady. I mean from her point of view yes you do very much do that and question the whole thing but god damn it. Anyway I´m pretty annoyed as well that Oswald did not seem to be able to answer her question about how he has archived doing good for the city but I can let that slip because I so deeply relate to that “Well ..” I really don’t like this plot, what annoys me most is probably the question of: Don´t other people see Clayjah van Spook ? Like have him spook around in Oswald´s place at night okay, but have him show up at the TV interview?! Why isn´t Oswald all like .. stop, hold that man that looks like my dead father. Or just stop that man. Like it does not make him look much more insane than running of and even saying “to hell with the people” This is annoying me so much. On a bright side: I like TARQUIN the way he presented himself was just lovely. And I adore his elegant reaction of *gets hit .. well, better place this cake carefully, so it won´t go to waste falling on the floor. Why did he have to go so early. I´m a bit pissed at Ed for setting him up like this. EDWARD NYGMA is still in full rage mode and wants Oswald to suffer plenty before putting him out of his misery. BARBARA is still all excited about getting a new empire to play with and meanwhile CLAYFACE is worried about his performance, the voice issue again ..

“That´s the law, this is family” HARVEY BULLOCK explains to Jim Gordon who is watching Mario Falcone´s funeral and is absolutely right. Jim feels guilty, wants to do something but for once thinks about his actions and leaves. Damn it LESLIE THOMPKINS really fits into that mob family. I´m more and more thinking about her being at least as much into the family as into Mario. And damn it Mario, he deserved better. Least I´m glad that seemingly he indeed was a decent person. [Why the heck did Victor not like Mario??!] LESLIE shows up at the GCPD “You´re the real virus, Jim” and I think what a drama queen but then again she is right. Nathaniel and Mario had the same infection, one is dead and one isn´t. Jim could have shouted at her instead of shooting Mario. She might have died then, or not. Given the way they showed Jim last week I do blame him up to a certain extent as well but that whole thing is annoying too. LEE & FALCONE have a mob moment discussing the death of Jim Gordon. “Blood for Blood” Falcone say and wants Jim dead. Falcone also says that Jim was more like his son than Mario in some way and, really?! Like they had some thing, but they barely met. What kind of judgment is that?! Anyway Lee spits hate and wants him dead too but Falcone says Jim is his, and that it anyway is a decision Lee has to live with without doing it herself, he is used to it. “Everything bad that's happened in my life has happened because of him.” “If Gordon dies, it's a weight we'll both have to carry. I'm used to such burdens.” LEE later visits BARNES to get to know more about the infection, thinking she might have had a life with a cured Mario but Barnes gets into full, no okay about 60% executioner mode (I´m surprised that he stopped the screaming that annoyed Jervis so much, maybe the blood just did not prepare his vocal cords for this) and Lee changes her mind. She tells Falcone to spare Jim. Falcone tells her she still loves him. Why is listening Falcone to her?! It´s still about his son and he is still dead.

* Leslie wants Jim dead for killing her love interest. Edwards wants Oswald suffering and then dead for killing his love interest. Don Falcone tells Leslie she talks of hate and revenge because she does not want to acknowledge that she still loves Jim Gordon. Is this meant to be a parallel?

“It's inevitability, Jim. Embrace it.” We have gone from S1 Everyone loves Jim to everybody wants to kill Jim. What a development. NATHANIEL BARNES declares he still wants to judge, jury and execute Jim and he is pretty confident that he will get out of Arkham and do as he declared. And omg that was great acting! Then VICTOR ZSASZ visits Jim Gordon and raids his kitchen. He warns him about Falcone wanting him dead but drops a hint that he does not. “Nice shot on Mario, I never liked him.” [Why?!] Omg, omg .. Zsasz could have an own agenda?! Do we finally get to know things about his loyalties about how he works and all that stuff we have been wondering about for so long?! I´m totally excited. Also I´m totally worried. This could get so messy. Also I can´t quite wrap my head around why he would hint something like this but still carry out orders like usual business. Like does he care about his own opinion?! Anyway I guess I got to wait for more answers. [But please Jim & Zsasz .. gotham you´d make me happy] Later Falcone orders Jim to get killed and Zsasz goes after him with two new fellow hitmen, who promptly get probably killed. Zsasz does not even bat an eyelash anymore when Jim uses one as cover and puts several bullets into them, seems this has become usual business. Why do people still work with him? [Or did he pick some he did not like anyway and was plotting to have Jim get away all along, for Mr. I do good work that was pretty much not good work there in the kitchen] Jim beats him, biig surprise, and points a gun at him, it clicks and it´s not loaded .. would Jim have shot him if? Jim leaves. Round two happens in his place but Falcone calls the whole thing of. Victor Zsasz leaves without any of the usual words of “oh please boss, let me kill, and murder, pretty please” ... this is suspicious, okay maybe I just want to see it as suspicious.

“These days I no longer say impossible. Unlikely.” LUCIUS FOX says when examining a dead/again girl. She was stabbed, she was fried with electricity, took a walk and died again. The morgue is more like a motel HARVEY says and he and JIM make their way to it. DWIGHT does not know how the corpse could escape but he worked at Indian Hill so he might have a clue and the Detective Dream Team follows him to a weird but not illegal gathering. Dwight got a Jerome patch on his back (someone tell me again patches are stupid and insignificant.) The crowd is dressed in Jerome memorial straight jackets and in for a good laugh. Guy on the stage shows some cut together Jerome material. Everyone is blind, bla and just believing the establishment´s lies, bla sanity is just a prison, bla .. wake up and be super duper enlightened and chant the same stuff as your fellow cult members. The GCPD Boys put a stop to the laughter but can´t catch Dwight. Instead VICTOR ZSASZ shows up and Jim is oh, shit! while Harvey is all oh shit?! and legitimately pissed about the question mark. As he tells Jim later, Jim should have told him. While Jim thinks it´s just his business because Zsasz is a professional, has great work ethics and only after him Harvey points out that he pretty often stands beside him and dear please tell me Harvey was aware of that great double meaning. Harvey always got Jim´s back. Jim should honor that with giving him a bit more of that quite vital information. Falcone appears and calls Victor back. Jim approaches him and all I can think is whatever comes out of your mouth better be an apology and he does say “I´m sorry”. Phew. Basic decency. I´m relieved. Falcone says that if it were his choice he would be dead .. giving Jim something to think about. Lee. God please no.

“You´re a good egg” I am so glad that Gotham is keeping this man that could kill you shows up in your kitchen eating your food thing, like I´m really glad this keeps happening, I love that .. also I might really have to move, this .. and all the fancy bathtubs..

* Diseases & Viruses 1. Alice Tetch´s Blood = Virus in the literal sense “This virus isn't the disease. It's the antidote.” Nathaniel Barnes says to Lee about being infected with the blood. Lee believes in a cure but Barnes does not want to have that. There is an interesting parallel to the second kind of Virus they have established.

2. Jerome´s Cult = Virus in the metaphorical sense “There is nothing more contagious than laughter.” Jerome announced in Season 2 and established the grounds for what we see now. People spreading and adding to his message. They see it, such as Barnes sees his infection as the antidote: “What you call sanity, it's just a prison in your minds that stops you from seeing you're just tiny little cogs in a giant, absurd machine, Wake up!” Moreover with them trying to bring back Jerome from the dead there is an additional little parallel established when Barnes talks about the Virus restoring his body “I've never felt better in my life. Clearer, stronger. More focused. Even now, I can feel it coursing through my veins. Restoring my body.” With Barnes it’s the blood infection and Jerome will be resurrected by the contagious laughter he spread.

3. Jim Gordon = Virus as moralist (mis)interpretation ? “You're the real virus, Jim. You seep into people's lives until you destroy them.” Lee says.

I´m tempted to apply the bible exegesis thing here but I´m struggling with the fourth type of interpretation and who cares anyway. And there has been disease talk in Gotham before all this but I´m too lazy to look stuff up .. for now..

* Omg that mouse running through the storage house

#gotham #Victor Zsasz #jerome valeska #Captain Nathaniel Barnes #mine #mine Gotham full episode reviews #gotham s3ep12 Ghosts

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gamegeekzeu-blog · 5 years ago

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In less than 50 days the 11th edition of GamesCom 2019 will take place together with the third Devcom, both hosted at the Koelnmesse in Cologne. We’ll give you a sneak preview about what to expect here, and off course check back after the event for all the interviews and reviews. Let’s take a look at “the Heart of Gaming” GamesCom 2019!

GamesCom, the world’s largest event for computer and video games, is opening its gates for games fans from around the world, and this year with an additional hall level! As a result, GamesCom 2019 is growing for the first time to around 210,000 square metres, which is around 5 percent more than in the previous year (2018: 201,000 square metres). Several hall sections of the entertainment area are also being revised and additional measures are being implemented for the improvement of quality of stay.

A larger area and the untangling of visitor hotspots should considerably improve the quality of stay at GamesCom 2019. Additional measures are the broadening of the corridors, additional catering and lounge areas for visitors, as well as the newly introduced evening ticket. In total, the entertainment area of GamesCom 2019 encompasses halls 5 to 10 and 11.3, as well as the outdoor event section (P8). In the (new) hall 11.3, the event arena, visitors can look forward to a special event program that differs clearly from other event areas of GamesCom. More information on the concept and the highlights of the event arena will follow in a few days. Hall 10.2 will contain the new indie village, the retro area, the GamesCom campus and the family & friends section. The merchandise area will once again increase significantly and is located in hall 5.2 and in parts of hall 5.1. The latter is also the new home of the popular cosplay village. As usual, visitors will once again find the outdoor area in P8 (car park behind hall 8). The business area is in halls 1 to 4.

“The expansion of the area and the adjustments in the entertainment area are the result of several factors. For one, the increasing demand for exhibition areas or enlargements in the entertainment halls means a need for additional space for new formats. At the same time, we have placed the improvement of quality of stay for visitors on the agenda as one of the central goals for 2019, and the various measures are paying off precisely here. For another thing, it is also the increased reinforcement of the event character of GamesCom that makes additional areas and an adjustment of the hall plan necessary. The goal is to offer visitors even more entertainment around the theme of computer and video games, and to thus enable our community an even better GamesCom experience”, says Tim Endres, Director GamesCom, Koelnmesse GmbH.

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“The focus of GamesCom 2019 is on the fans. Which is why we want to design the visit to GamesCom to be considerably more comfortable and will be implementing a whole series of measures this year to realize this goal. These include new sections, the untangling of visitor hotspots, the evening ticket, wider corridors and additional areas for relaxation. In this way, we are reacting to the greatly increased interest of visitors and exhibitors in GamesCom”, says Christian Baur, Head of GamesCom with game – the Association for the German Games Industry e.V.

Games fans from around the world can also look forward to a great gamescom in 2019. Among others, the following renowned companies of the computer and video game industry have secured their place at gamescom 2019: 2K Games, Bandai Namco Entertainment, Bethesda Softworks, Capcom, Deep Silver, ELECTRONIC ARTS/EA Games, facebook, Google, Microsoft/Xbox, Nintendo, Sony PlayStation, Square Enix, THQ Nordic, Ubisoft and Wargaming. In addition to the new products of the exhibitors, the top theme of eSports will also be present at gamescom.

Devcom 2019

Devcom takes place from 18-19 August prior to GamesCom 2019, within Koelnmesse’s Congress Centre East in Cologne, and expands the world’s biggest event for computer and video games by an international conference for game developers. Devcom’s 3rd edition offers its attendees a rich conference program presented on more than 8 stages by top-notch speakers who share their knowledge and experience in valuable talks, panels, workshops and keynotes. Among them:

Pia Jacqmart (Cyanide)

Jehanne Rousseau (Spiders)

Whitney Clayton (Compulsion Games)

Jason Hickey and Dustin Brown (Insomniac Games)

Christian Pana, Adam Olsson and Simon Koudriavtsev (Ubisoft Massive)

Catharina Bohler (Sarepta Studio)

Elena Nikolova (Snapshot Games)

David Fox & Noah Falstein

Ryuichi Nishizawa (Wonderboy-Serie)

Goichi „SUDA51“ Suda

and more than 70 additional speakers.

The expo floor is the event’s heart and center, including a large matchmaking and HR area, as well as the indie exhibition with roughly 50 indie teams on-site. More than 250 companies, 3000+ international attendees and company representatives make Devcom the perfect event for you to find future business partners or clients, or to simply grow your industry network. The icing on the cake: the first edition of the ‚Devcom „Ellie“ Awards‘ followed by the Devcom Sunset Party, as well as the Devcom Developer Night. On Monday morning, Devcom opens its doors for the Women in Games Breakfast, which also grants access to those who do not have a Devcom ticket.

Please find further detailed information at: www.devcom.global

Partner Country 2019

The Netherlands is the official partner country of GamesCom 2019. Koelnmesse GmbH, game – the Association of the German Games Industry, and the Dutch Games Association have signed a partnership agreement. With the Netherlands assuming this official role, Koelnmesse has secured a partnership with a growing games market that is also home to a diverse spectrum of games developers – from indie studios and serious games specialists to the producers of international blockbusters. The Netherlands also has large numbers of e-sports fans. This makes the country an ideal partner for GamesCom 2019, both in terms of its market potential and its industry specialisms. As GamesCom’s partner country, the Netherlands will represent international exhibitors at Europe’s leading business platform for the games industry from 20 to 24 August 2019.

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“I’m delighted that GamesCom 2019 has a very special partner country with the Netherlands. For both our exhibitors and our visitors, the Dutch are our neighbors and have always been very well represented at GamesCom . This is something we want to build on this year, and we hope to be able to welcome even more of our Dutch neighbors as visitors in the business and entertainment areas, at Devcom or the GamesCom city festival,” says Felix Falk, Managing Director of game and co- organizer of GamesCom .

“The Dutch gaming landscape is characterized by hundreds of studios, combined with a minority of larger, internationally well-established companies. The Netherlands offers a healthy working climate that fosters creativity and originality by providing the right mix of freedom and support. GamesCom is the single most important international event for Dutch game developers. That’s why we’re really excited that the Netherlands will be the partner country for GamesCom 2019. Its impact and influence not only supports Dutch companies in evolving on a professional level – it also provides a platform where we can meet gaming-focused minds and get down to work on things together – you can’t get more Dutch than that,” says Horst Streck, Chairman of the Dutch Games Association.

For those who want to be at GamesCom 2019 live, all still available tickets and further (travel) information can be found under www.gamescom.global

And if you want to let us know which developers to interview or games to check on the show floor, just let us know on any of the social media!

GamesCom 2019 and Devcom 2019 In less than 50 days the 11th edition of GamesCom 2019 will take place together with the third Devcom, both hosted at the Koelnmesse in Cologne.

#devcom #Gamescom #Insomniac Games #koelnmesse #partner #SUDA51 #ubisoft

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allofbeercom · 6 years ago

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Terry Jones: ‘I’ve got dementia. My frontal lobe has absconded’

The actor, director and Monty Python star talks about how he is learning to live with his illness, with the help of close friend Michael Palin

Terry Jones first exhibited signs that all was not well with his health in July 2014. He and his close friend Michael Palin were performing with the rest of the surviving Monty Pythons Flying Circus troupe in a show of sketches and songs, Monty Python live (mostly) at the O2 in London.

Terry was always very good at remembering lines, recalled Palin last week. But this time he had real problems, and in the end he had to use a teleprompter. That was a first for him. I realised then that something more serious than memory lapses was affecting him.

Jones, now 75, later passed standard tests designed to pinpoint people who have Alzheimers disease. His speech continued to deteriorate nevertheless. He said less and less at dinner parties, when he used to love to lead conversations, said his daughter Sally.

Eventually, in September 2015, Jones was diagnosed as having frontotemporal dementia (FTD), a condition that affects the front and sides of the brain, where language and social control centres are based. When cells there die off, people lose their ability to communicate, and their behaviour becomes increasingly erratic and impulsive. Unlike Alzheimers, there is no loss of reasoning or orientation. However, planning, decision making and speech are affected, and patients often seem less caring or concerned about their family and friends.

Sally recalls that even though her fathers speech was faltering, he was still initially able to outline his plans and thoughts by email. However, the emails slowly became more and more jumbled, and by autumn last year he had to give up, she said. For someone who lived by words and discussions this was tragic.

Joness family revealed his condition to the public six months ago, and at last years Bafta Cymru ceremony in October, his son Bill had to help his father collect his award for outstanding contribution to television and film. The only words that Jones was able to utter were to tell his audience to quieten down.

Monty Python star Terry Jones and son tearful at Bafta ceremony video

Jones was not expected to talk to the press again until last week, when his family requested an interview to help promote public awareness of FTD, a condition that affects tens of thousands of people in the UK but which remains a relatively little-known medical problem. Their hope was that information about Joness responses to his condition might help others cope with it.

Many patients, particularly those in the early stages of the condition, are often unaware they have anything wrong with them at all, said Professor Nick Fox, a dementia expert who has been involved in the diagnosis and care of Jones. It is only later when FTD is diagnosed that you get some inkling of the root of their earlier behaviour. People may not show sympathy or concern for others, including their spouses much to the consternation of the rest of their family, added Fox, who is director of the Dementia Research Centre at University College London.

Loss of language nevertheless remains the most noticeable symptom of FTD. In the case of Jones, his dialogue is now restricted to a few words, usually uttered to agree with those who are speaking to him. Apart from that, he looks fit for his years. Dressed in black trousers, shirt and jacket and lurid purple socks, he cut a trim figure during our interview. He remains an enthusiastic walker, likes his beer and wine, and watches old films compulsively. Some Like It Hot is a favourite.

Palin is a frequent visitor to Joness home and the affection between the two men is clear from the start. They clasp each other warmly on Palins arrival and Jones looks relieved to see him. The thing that struck me was how Terry reacted to his diagnosis, said Palin. He was very matter of fact about it and would stop people in the street and tell them: Ive got dementia, you know. My frontal brain lobe has absconded.

He knew exactly what was affecting him and he wanted to share that knowledge because that is the way that Terry is. FTD may cause loss of inhibition, but Terry was never very inhibited in the first place.

Palin and Jones first started working together in 1965 on The Frost Report, a collaboration that culminated in the formation of the Monty Python Flying Circus team in 1969. Jones was also co-director (with Terry Gilliam) of Monty Python and The Holy Grail before directing the Python films Life of Brian and The Meaning of Life. He went on to direct other films, including Personal Services and The Wind in the Willows. He has also written books on medieval history and the Iraq war (to which he was bitterly opposed).

The Pythons in 2014, at the time of the last live show. Photograph: Andy Gotts/PA

The pair still regularly have lunch together. We chat well, I chat, added Palin. But when the meal is over he makes it clear he has to move. He has to get to the next thing on his agenda and he just puts his head down and goes. I have never felt discomfited in his presence, however. There is no embarrassment. He doesnt shout or show his bottom.

Only taxis cause problems. He always wants to give directions and he hates traffic, said Sally. That is nothing new in a sense. He always knew a better way and would always let the taxi driver know that very early on in the journey. At this point, Jones nods vigorously.

In contrast with other forms of dementia, walking or moving around is not usually a problem with FTD. Terry still goes on very long walks across Hampstead Heath, often following the most obscure routes, and it is very hard to keep up with him, said Palin. His old pal Barry Cryer, the comedian, came round one day and said he would like to join Terry on a walk on the heath, and nothing would deter him. It was a muddy day and Barry kept slipping while Terry just walked on and on. In the end, Barry fell over so many times he gave up. He told me that there he was on his backside in the mud while his friend who had dementia was striding out miles ahead of him across the heath.

Certainly Jones is no shuffling, helpless victim of cognitive degeneration. He still enjoys his beer, his wine, his walks, his films and a good joke, added Palin. These are not things you associate with a depressive illness. However, the condition can still cause problems, as Fox stresses.

The frontal lobe contains the brain cells which act as our social censor, he says. Essentially it is a handbrake on our behaviour. Take that off and you start to act impulsively. People get into all sorts of trouble particularly if they are also losing the ability to speak and to explain their actions.

The team in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which Jones co-directed with Terry Gilliam. Photograph: Allstar

People with FTD end up in prison in this way. It is made worse because people with FTD have no insight into their condition. They are not aware that things are going wrong for them.

This lack of insight can have profound consequences, Fox added. The head of a company in the early stages of FTD has no idea that his insight has been compromised and can make decisions that have enormous consequences. There are companies that have lost all their money this way.

A tendency to impulsive action is also noticeable. Food can be a particular problem, said Sally. As soon as it is put down in front of him he will grab it and eat it. We made him a birthday cake a few weeks ago. He started to eat it before we could get him to blow out the candles.

And then there are other peoples perceptions of his condition, which can also cause distress. Friends often ask: will he recognise me?, added Sally.

I tell them: of course he will. It is his speech that has gone. In fact, he loves seeing friends. His only problem is that he no longer has the ability to tell them how pleased he is to see them.

It is a point endorsed by Palin. I think that must be the most difficult thing not to be able to say quite simply how you are feeling on a given occasion. We assume that he is happy, but that assumption could be wrong. We just dont know.

Certainly, it is hard to believe that Jones is unaware of his condition. However, he is clearly consoled by the support of his family, who help to keep his life enriched.

It is also obvious he gets strength from the presence of Palin. Towards the end of our interview, Jones reaches out to grasp his hand, giving it a good squeeze. The pair hold hands for a couple of minutes, a gesture that perfectly reflects their 50 years of friendship and its importance in sustaining Jones through his tribulations.

Where to find help

The FTD support group provides practical help and information for people with the disorder and their families. Their website gives details of meetings in different regions of the UK an important way to meet others coping with similar problems that may seem very different from those experienced in more common dementias.

A specialist progressive aphasia support group offers help for those whose speech and language are affected.

Jargon-free research updates can be found at www.ftdtalk.org

The dementia research centre at UCL has a specialist focus on young-onset dementias and is linked to the cognitive disorders service at the National Hospital for Neurology and Neurosurgery, which receives NHS referrals for people with FTD.

Join Dementia Research enables people both with and without dementia to register an interest in taking part in research.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/terry-jones-ive-got-dementia-my-frontal-lobe-has-absconded/

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topmixtrends · 6 years ago

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IN This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things, the academic Whitney Phillips explored at close quarters the world of online trolls. She embedded herself among the natives of websites like Reddit and 4chan and studied the toxic banter that is their stock-in-trade, a blend of postmodern nihilism, overt bigotry, and “voluntary, gleeful sociopathy over the world’s current apoplectic state.” The trolls’ knack for appropriating and repurposing mainstream media tropes prompted Phillips to label them “cultural dung beetles.” At the time of the book’s publication in 2015, one could have been forgiven for thinking that its subject was a niche subculture — a marginal if disturbing societal pathology on a par with any other sort of hooliganism. Within a couple of years it had become, by some accounts, something like a political force. There is a widespread perception that the enthusiastic support of a broad constituency of trolls, online pranksters, and far-rightist cranks played a decisive role in propelling Donald Trump into the White House in the 2016 election. This assessment sat very nicely with the trolls themselves, who were all too happy to take the credit for Hillary Clinton’s defeat. In the days after Trump’s election, a triumphant post appeared on 4chan’s notorious /pol/ message board: “We did it. /pol/ saved America.”

In Alt-Right: From 4chan to the White House, the BBC broadcast journalist Mike Wendling casts doubt on this take. Wendling points out that the Republicans’ share of the white vote had barely budged compared to Mitt Romney’s unsuccessful run for president in 2012. For all the hype around Trump’s unorthodox and brashly chauvinistic campaign, his electoral victory had more to do with the Democrat vote slipping away than with any right-wing surge. Moreover, it is doubtful whether the alt-right was ever a self-aware and contiguous movement in the months leading up to the election. Wendling cites Google Analytics data indicating that the term “alt-right” was relatively little known prior to Hillary Clinton’s alluding to it in her Reno speech of August 2016. Clinton’s attempt to warn voters about this burgeoning radical fringe appears, in retrospect, to have put wind in the sails of the American far right, giving a sense of unity to what was in fact a hodgepodge of disparate elements. Wendling argues that the influence of sites like 4chan has been similarly overestimated: “[I]t is […] quite clear that the average voter in a key Midwestern state was much more likely to come into contact with Facebook, or someone who’d been on Facebook, than they were to be ‘red-pilled’ by 4chan.”

Alt-Right’s concise survey of the 21st-century far right begins by introducing the reader to the world views of various neo-Nazi ideologues, such as Richard Spencer, who is forthright about his white nationalist agenda: “I want what could probably be called a global empire […] a homeland for all white people, whether you’re German or Celtic or Slavic or English.” Wendling observes that the standard tactic deployed by trolls when arguing with liberal or left-wing opponents online — “exaggerate, simplify, burn down the straw man” — is echoed in the rhetorical modus operandi of media outlets like the far-right news organ Breitbart: “They are up front about their biases, which resonate with and whip up their core audience. It’s a messy, shouty tabloid mainlining hashtag steroids.” The book features pithy pen portraits of some of the main players, like Milo Yiannopoulos (prior to getting the Breibart gig he was “a megaphone looking for a movement”) and Alex Jones, whose Infowars program boasted some eight million viewers prior to being shut down. Jones’s bizarre brand of paranoiac extremism reached its nadir when he told the grieving parents of children murdered at Sandy Hook that the massacre had been staged, and that they themselves were active participants in a liberal conspiracy designed to compel Washington to pass gun control laws.

Wendling’s prognosis is relatively sanguine. He observes that many of the alt-right’s alliances have splintered since Trump took office, and that several of its big personalities have fallen out with one another. The alt-right brand certainly seems to have lost some of its luster of late: it is indicative of the term’s disrepute that even someone as petulantly obnoxious as the far-right journalist Paul Joseph Watson recently felt the need to expressly distance himself from the alt-right in a tweet, even though — as Twitter users were quick to point out — he had aligned himself with the movement in a number of older tweets. The Canadian psychologist Jordan B. Peterson, who is perhaps a few centimeters to the left of alt-right but shares some of its obsessions, recently claimed not to know who the alt-right are. None of this quite amounts to repudiation, but it does point to a telling ambivalence, at the very least, about the connotations associated with the label. Wendling is probably right to speculate that this particular iteration of American far-rightism will be crushed by the weight of its own contradictions and the feckless incompetence of some of the personalities involved. But it will persist in some other guise so long as its underlying pathologies continue to proliferate, particularly if mainstream news outlets like Fox News continue to provide a platform for bigotry and hatred.

The most illuminating insights in the book are Wendling’s brief but revealing interviews with various ordinary people who identify as alt-righters. Taken collectively they constitute a somber and pathetic portrait of stunted and self-pitying manhood finding consolation in chauvinism. That a great many of them are single and or childless would be unworthy of note were it not so conspicuously off-brand: “For a group obsessed with the promulgation of a race,” Wendling notes wryly, “many activists seemed supremely disinterested in actually breeding.” Another common trait is their apparent inability to grasp the connection between discourse and real-life events — a somewhat ironic failing, given their fixation on the power of media. One particularly conscientious interviewee tells Wendling that he takes “great pride in making sure that nobody I meet or interact with from any race […] is affected by my beliefs in any physical way.” The archetypal alt-righter wants to have his fascist cake and eat it: one moment he is railing in blustering earnest; the next, when people are murdered — as happened in Charlottesville in August 2017 — it’s all just an ironic lark.

Wendling draws an apt analogy here between the radicalization of young would-be jihadists and the creeping brainwashing that ensnares vulnerable and credulous young men in right-wing online communities: “Once drawn in, they are conveyor-belted along a path of ever-more-extreme content, and slowly drawn into a radical bubble which warped their sense of reality.” A penchant for MAGA caps and Confederate flag-waving is merely one manifestation of the phenomenon at hand; the loose-knit community of self-styled “incels,” or “involuntary celibates,” several of whose members have carried out mass-casualty atrocities in recent years, is another. Though stereotypically populated largely by scrawny “beta” types, theirs is unequivocally an ideology of radical chauvinism every bit as dangerous as the militaristic machismo of common or garden neo-Nazism. “Alt-right” was only ever a buzz phrase; it may be fading from prominence, but the death cult remains at large. Homicidal mania is the logical end point of all such movements: both in the macropolitical context and at the level of the individual, they stand for nothing except the negation and destruction of the other. As one 4chan poster put it in those dog days of 2016: “I wanted to see everything burn and get lots of happenings.”

Houman Barekat is a writer and critic based in London, and founding editor of Review 31. He is co-editor (with Robert Barry and David Winters) of The Digital Critic: Literary Culture Online (O/R Books, 2017).

The post Get Lots of Happenings: On Mike Wendling’s “Alt-Right: From 4chan to the White House” appeared first on Los Angeles Review of Books.

from Los Angeles Review of Books https://ift.tt/2LZC5Ng

#Los Angeles Review of Books #topmixtrends

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theliterateape · 6 years ago

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting – The Religious Liberty Task Force

by Joe Janes

The First Meeting of the

Religious Liberty Task Force

9:00am, August 1, 2018, The Attorney General's Office, Washington, D.C.

In attendance: Attorney General Jeffrey Beauregard Sessions,Associate Attorney General Jesse Panuccio and Assistant Attorney General for the Office of Legal Policy Beth Williams

Sessions: Merry Christmas, everyone.

Panuccio: Merry Christmas.

Williams: Merry Christmas, Sir.

Sessions: I always like to start my meetings with a quote from the King James Bible, if I may. “For it is easier for a rich man to enter into the Kingdom of God.”

Panuccio: Amen.

Williams: Is that the full…? Isn’t there a camel involved? Some sewing?

Panuccio: Beth needs to brush up on her Bible lessons. Good thing we’re meeting.

Sessions: Welcome to the first meeting of the Religious Liberty Task Force.

Panuccio: It's like Space Force, but with God.

Sessions: We don't need rockets to get to this heaven. Just gumption and the Lord's steady hand on the wheel. We're here because a dangerous movement, undetected by many, is now challenging and eroding our great tradition of religious freedom, which must be confronted and defeated.

Panuccio: No one should ever be persecuted for refusing to make gay cake.

Sessions: No nuns should ever be forced to pay for contraception when they rightly believe God wants us to be fruitful and multiply, except for the nuns. And by multiply, I mean multiply from within, of course. Not by adding people to our country. No anchor babies! God only wants christians.

Panuccio: Pure American christians.

Sessions: Just as our forefathers intended.

Williams: Is it?

Sessions: “In God We Trust”, Beth.

Pannucio: It’s in the Bible, the constitution, the pledge of allegiance, and all over our money.

Sessions: Under the Religious Liberty Task Force, everyone will be free to express and practice their faith at home, at work, and in their communities. No more will they be held down by other inferior religious blasphemers, like atheists.

Williams: Atheists don’t believe in God.

Sessions: And yet they are clearly in cahoots with Satan.

Pannucio: Maybe some mandatory military service will straighten out the atheists. You know what they say. There are no atheist’s in a fox’s hole.

Sessions: That or prison. We’ll get them on their knees one way or another. How has the public response been to the Religious Liberty Task Force?

Williams: We’ve had many calls, Mr. Sessions. The phone has been ringing off the hook.

Sessions: This is good news. I knew we would be rewarded for becoming shepherds to the Lord's flock. What do we have?

Williams: There’s been some very brutal Nazi/White Supremist graffiti at a synagogue in Indiana.

Panuccio: Sounds like they just need a can of paint.

Sessions: Send them a can of paint. Take it out of petty cash. Next.

Williams: A Muslim man says his employer won’t let him pray at work. His employer says it’s disruptive and scares customers.

Panuccio: Sounds like it’s already handled.

Sessions: Got anything more Christian-y?

Williams: A gay couple is suing a Chick-fil-A because the clerk wouldn’t sell them chicken sandwiches after seeing them holding hands in line.

Sessions: That clerk is a hero!

Panuccio: We'll give that clerk all the legal support they need.

Sessions: How dare they flaunt their disregard for God’s plan in the Lord’s place that is Chick-fil-A.

Williams: I’ll have one of our lawyers look into it.

Sessions: One other thing on the agenda comes from our leader-chosen-by God, President Trump. I told him we would be using the divine wisdom of the Ten Commandments to guide our actions.

Panuccio: And he was on board.

Sessions: However, he thinks we can streamline them to just one commandment, “Thou Shalt Not Kill…directly.”

Williams: He added “directly”?

Panuccio: Who’s to say it wasn’t that way on the original tablet? I wasn’t there, were you?

Williams: Nothing about adultery, coveting, or honoring one’s mother or father?

Sessions: He felt those would be difficult to enforce, and everybody ignores them anyway. He also wants to add two commandments. "STOP THE RIGGED WITCH HUNT" and"NO COLLUSION."

Panuccio: I can hear the Lord's voice in the "all caps".

Williams: I don't think those count as commandments.

Sessions: We’ll save a lot of money only having three commandments. It’s a shrewd frugal business move. Oh, one more thing we do need to do before we wrap has to do with you, Beth.

Williams: I go to church. On important Sundays. I swear.

Sessions: In order to work with us men, we need to confirm your virginity.

Williams: I’m 39. And married.

Panuccio: Sorry. It’s the law, now.

Sessions: Don’t worry. I’ll wear gloves and keep my eyes closed.

Williams: Merry Fucking Christmas.

#Religious Liberty Task Force #Chick-fil-A #Jeff Sessions #Trump #Ten Commandments #satire #comedy #Christian persecution #Christianity #virginity tests #LGBTQQIA #atheists #Joe Janes

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rockmore-resists · 7 years ago

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How to get to there from here

December 8, 2017

We are in a political mess right now. The GOP has thrown any sense of ethics or decency out the window in trade for unity and victory. Russians have infiltrated our internet so badly it is at times impossible to know what is true. (I myself have fallen prey to fake sites and fake stories when I make the mistake of moving too fast and not checking details for accuracy). To top it off the DNC appears to be inactive and confused. And while that judgment may not be fair, because I know the Democrats are rallying and fighting, perception is a key factor in today's world, and the right wing spin doctors are having a field day with that at the expense of the Democrats. Reality has become an appearance as opposed to an actual thing as defined in Websters dictionary. Chaos Let's talk about chaos for a moment. The GOP, Trump, the Russians, FOX news, Breitbart, RT and now troll farms in Caracas are using chaos to confuse us, and they are doing an excellent job. However when you pop smoke on a battle field like they have been, you also lose the advantage of knowing what your opposition is doing, and therein lies the first major strategic failure of the right wing. Too much chaos. There is so much chaos now it is fair to say I don't think anyone knows what's going on. Even the heavy artillery strategists like Bannon have got to be confused and making decisions at least partially based on guesswork. And as Americans learn to 'see' Russian trolls, what are the trolls to do? Fighting with us doesn't work so easy anymore. They need a new approach. In the midst of all this confusion and deception, no one knows for certain how big, for example, the Resistance movement really is. Based on probable statistics, I would venture to guess at least a couple of million. But no one KNOWS. No one knows for certain how many Women are running for office in 2018 and 2020. Based on what we have seen and what is reported, that number is in the hundreds of thousands now. No one knows for certain because the GOP owned part of the media (which is the majority, sadly) keeps trying to obfuscate the truth to break our spirit. But they have obfuscated now too much to the point that not even they know for certain how many Women are coming to take their jobs. So while this is damned exhausting and confusing, we are all on a level playing field. To a certain extent. The more they muddy the water, the easier it becomes for opposing strategy to be unleashed with the element of surprise. Which at this point is not anything any one person is controlling. What we are watching are the forces of nature in action. This is the pure will of the people rising up everywhere without any kind of coordination. People in Phoenix, the Bronx, LaFayette, Seattle, Duluth, Achorage, Hilo - we are finding out that we have the same opinions about Women in power, about equal rights, about health care, about GUNS. We are not the minority and we are not so weird as the media and the GOP would have us believe. And as that realization spreads of it's own accord across America we are witnessing a massive movement coalescing out of the chaos. Take heart: For it is in time of great chaos such as this that great change is possible. Everything is fluid. Anything can happen. Change A word about change. It has to happen at a certain pace or we will destroy ourselves. Societal change is like taking a trip on jumbo jet. In order to get from resting on the ground to full velocity and cruising altitude, that jet has to muscle through every pound of thrust required to reach full speed. That jet has to go through every inch of altitude to attain the desired height. If the jet was to pop up to 27,000 feet launching immediately to 300 miles per hour it would disintegrate and destroy all the people inside. It is the same with the changes we are making. We have suffered for so long as a race under the yoke of oppression. We have been antagonized for centuries by the creation of conflict that only serves the purposes of the rich. We have bled out by the millions until the Earth herself wretches with the taste of our blood. We are ready to be free, we are ready to tear this yoke from around our necks and set fire to the system that locked it there. We are ready. And if we could wake up tomorrow with it all different, wouldn't that be a dream come true? Yes. And we should visualize that Utopia, we should lock on to that desired future, and we should work toward it any way we can with gestures and achievements big and small. Daily. Hourly. We also must realize there is a time frame here to accomplishing our goals. Like a cake. It must have the proper ingredients and process for making it or else you will end up with something horribly disgusting. And I am writing this for me as much as I am for any of you. I lost my shit this week when the Democratic Party descended in mass on Al Franken and drummed him out of Congress. But now that I have calmed down and listened to voices of reason, I understand that the Democrats certainly have a strategy and I must trust them. Why?

Because we need unity right now. We need it badly. The worst thing we can do is to scatter into a bunch of smaller parties in the name of getting exactly what we want. To make that choice is to hand the GOP victory after victory on a silver plate. If we proceed down the path of political dispersion then we are the authors of our own defeat, collectively, and all may truly be lost. For while this chaos gives us an advantage, it is also the reminder that we all stand at a very dark crossroads in the history of America and the world. The forces that seek to destroy our government and usurp our freedom seek to do so to the entire planet. There are movements in many countries heavily influenced by the White Nationalists. There is a campaign of destabilization underway sponsored by Russia in collusion with those same Nazi's. They want money, they want oil, they want control and they don't care about whether you and I live or die. The welfare of the human race is the last thing on their mind, and so that is why they must go. And so I conclude to you that we are at a time of great promise and a time of great threat. I would urge us all to see this fight for what it is: Good versus Evil. Right versus Wrong. Life versus Death. And while it may gall us to the color of olive green, while we may choke and gag swallowing this jagged little pill, we must. We must unify as we have never unified before, we must choose one party and we must take action to rid the world of the scourge which takes delight in our death. First and foremost. We need the protection of the Democratic party. We need the wisdom of the Senators. We need their legal knowledge. We need their strategy. We need the resources. We need the momentum. We are not at any place in time right now where we can afford to re-invent the wheel. We are at war. Everything we hold dear is under attack. I encourage you to hold on to your values. I want you to cling to those ideals you seek in the world. Never surrender those golden rays of light, whether that be equal rights for all, gun control, matriarchy, ending war, legalizing abortion, decriminalizing marijuana â€“ whatever you aspire to in the name of change, stoke that fire in your heart and bring that heat to the Democratic Party. We have a job to do, and we need to do it together. The first item on the top of that list is to smash the GOP dead in their tracks and kill their agenda of oppression, robbery, death and destruction. When we have stopped that deadly juggernaut and ensured the safety of our fellows, then let's work out the details. The Democratic Party is the party of the people. Let us jump into that pool of Democracy and together use that tool to make what our ancestors sought to create for us all: A more perfect union.

http://www.rockmorerecords.com/democrats-united-171208.html

#Democrats #Unity #Resistance #Victory #Elect Women #Blue Wave

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bchkeesha887-blog · 7 years ago

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