#gets me every fucken time
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alright yall. listen very close, and hear what i say.
i swear on my life, you will regret this day 🫵
now i won’t sing your praise anymore
heh
*INHAAAALE*
#i love this bit of the song#gets me every fucken time#thor is so silly#as is his song#the mechs#the mechanisms#the bifrost incident#happy fuck you and fuck your train friday#<3
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every few years im reminded that the war of the worlds stage show exists which is never good because i always find something new to hate about it
#missives#the war of the worlds#jeff wayne#watched a few clips of the latest tour and brooooo why does it suck so bad#it doesnt have to be this way. make me the single divine arbiter of what goes into the show and ill fix it i promise#lile obviously it is successful somehow but that doesnt make it good#rip it from jeff's clammy little hands and make it into a proper musical please please please. they were on the right track in 2016#with the dominion theatre production#its been downhill ever since#like. its just a bunch of decrepit old men way past their prime who desperately need to retire (looking at jeff and herbie flowers and JH)#and a stupid fucken hologram of an actor nobody likes. put a real actor there PLEASE#its soooo painful watching these genuinely talented performers being forced to rush their lines#anyway! my latest gripe#every new iteration of brave new world ive seen since 2018 keeps making the song worse#2018 is on thin fucking ice bevause i like the cast so much but thats where it all began im pretty sure#turning the end of the song into this weird combo love duet and whole cast ensemble song (life begins again) out of fucken nowhere#its the artilleryman's song holy shit get that out of here!#and i get that the latest tour is the 'post covid' life begins again tour or w/e but holy FUCK#can someone please explain to me why they now even have the other cast members on the screen saying lines at the same time#as the artilleryman#e.g. im not trying to tell you what to be#and its going to have to start with me and you etc etc etc#its annoying and even worse it doesnt make sense!!! why are they there!!! why are they saying the lines!! those lines have a very#specific meaning within the context of the song#idk it just seems like the song keeps being stripped of all its original meaning and i really like it so it's driving me bonkers#anywya. ANYWAY
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#hshxxbxbxhdhxhdxndhsgsjxhxnd I love him#idk man idk what it is I just loooove him#korekiyo#these two lines in particular make me go nuts#I mean his whole lil monologue here is great too but just. this. mwah.#he was having the time of his life in the last trial#“respect begins to bloom in my heart for this wonderfully cruel culprit#among everything else he fucken said abt the culprit last trial#and now the next morning the first thing he says to you is this shit#it’s been a great 24 hours for him#he witnessed so much crazy shit and he loved every second of it#he gets it
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i lied i did watch the oscars
#came into it an hour in bc i forgot they started an hour early#frustrating and alluring as always. the in memoriam part was filmed so bad like just show us the scream damn!#as much as i bitch about the current state of movies damn if the oscars dont get me every time. i want to be at that silly podium#anyway. other thoughts abt the evening#swann arlaud people i get it now. i get it .#they should have given that dog from anatomy of a fall an award too idc that the dog wasnt nominated#al pacinos fucken delivery was hysterical i love the new yorker drawing that had him like a fortune teller saying 'i see oppenheimer'#robert de niro apparently not having a good time it seemed. annette bening slayed w those glasses#oh bc im a movie nerd i of course fill out my own little ballot and somehow miraculously got 11 right (beat my dad who had 7)#my strategy is i pick the people i want to win which usually has me getting very few right#oh loved the 0.3 second glimpse of willem in the audience! love him. his crazy makeup in poor things won them that award#trust that if and when i get to the oscars sometime in the future ill be liveblogging it. i promise#EDITED TAGS the SCREEN of the in memoriam not the scream. sorry
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Every time I see those posts about the AO3 F/F to M/M ratios, all I can think is:
Okay, excellent point. But what if you just wrote it?
Like. Yeah, man, I'm sure it's discouraging to see raw numbers talking about how your ship doesn't get the rep it needs. But when you get down to numbers... sometimes the difference within fandoms is less than 500 more M/M works than F/F works. That's actionable. You can fill that gap with a fraction of the people liking / reblogging posts about F/F erasure.
Sometimes the gap is bigger. It's like, 1000 more works are tagged M/M. 2000, or more. Yeah, that's a big gap, but you could make it one less. If every person liking or reblogging a post about the disparity of ship fics on AO3, that number would shrink drastically, or outright disappear.
IDK. I write F/F. I write M/M too, as well as M/F. But I write F/F, and when I see that sorta post. It doesn't feel like a call to action. It feels like somehow, in some way, I'm not doing enough when I post up fanfiction for free about stuff I like.
It makes me feel like I should stop sharing my F/F work, that it doesn't matter, that people don't recognize the effort or love or time that goes into it. Even beyond that, I feel discouraged about the work I have put out, because thousands of words written all about an F/F pairing are only seen in that raw stat format.
"There's X M/M fics and Y F/F fics." Yes, I know, and that has to suck. But look at how many people wrote F/F fics! Have you commented on each of those F/F fics? Have you given kudos? Did you feel inspired to write or draw because of those F/F fics? That's what fandom is for. That's why we create. If that's not inspiring you to "close the gap" on those stats, I don't know what to say.
#personal talk#ao3 writer#ao3 stats#IDK. Man. Sometimes it feels like those posts are made in bad faith. Especially when there's no CTA. No encouragement to actually read the#—fics that exist. Massive reblog chains talking about X fandom or Y fandom not having enough F/F fics that don't background the characters.#Dude! That could be you! You could be on the front lines of this issue. You clearly care about it. A lot. You clearly are passionate about—#your ship getting the representation it needs. That is so fair and commendable. Why haven't you linked your favorite F/F ships? Why haven't#you recommended your favorite F/F writer? Why haven't you organized some F/F themed AO3 event all about writing ladies with ladies?#It can be so goddamn discouraging to write F/F at times. Not even because there's ' ' less engagement ' ' because that's not why I write it#I write F/F ships because I like them! They are fun to me! I like those characters and want to smoosh them together like dolls! But seeing—#post after post after post after post. Ragging on these stats. Taking screenshots of fandoms and their M/M to F/F ratios. How many of those#F/F fics did you even fucken read. How many of them did you even bother to slap kudos on. How many of those fics did you share with your—#friends on Discord or email to your buddies or talk about on your Tumblr? Like. People aren't writing F/F for you to consume. They're#—writing F/F to share what they like with the world. So maybe do the bare minimum and share that passion? IDK. It's really fucken hard.#Both to see this kinda thing and to articulate it. The problem feels like the solution is just so obvious. I saw a post with 18000 likes.#If every single one of those people wrote a 300w ficlet. Suddenly there would be 18000 F/F fics. How is this not mathing. Come on.
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Kaeya most definitely made at least one joke about how bc Addie and Elzer helped keep him alive during Luc’s Adventurous 4yrs Adventures Abroad, he was gonna make himself their problem.
Addie will never forget to bring up he has yet to make good on his threat every time he visits.
#hc; kaeya#Kae: You saved my life. now you’re never gonna get rid of me. I might just stick around & make yall miserable lol#Addie: fucken BET#//Every time he rolls around to the Winery on business after that she’s just Where is the misery you promised Master Kaeya :)#//‘Thought you said we’d never be rid of you :)’ ‘Addie I—‘ ‘You wouldt DARE lie to me would u Master Kaeya? :)’#//Elzer is more low key abt it#//But in a silly way that sounds awful out of context#//Like ‘Y’know; we could always use a little more misery around here. why don’t you stick around longer :)’#//Everybody and Luc stares blankly in disbelief and or confusion; meanwhile Addie’s lurking nearby while Kae’s sweatin bullets#//Just ‘why won’t they let that GO: aaaaAAAAA-‘#//Luc learning abt the bit might make Kae tormenting him at the tavern go down easier#//Like ‘Ah; he’s here to deliver the misery he promised :)’#//Only to regret everything and his life choices(/j) the INSTANT Kae opens his mouth#//Each time he sees him dropping by to clown; he rests a little easier knowing Kae is sticking around; however it goes down#//Has a heckin STRESS every time he decides to Cats Tail instead#hc; diluc#//Sigh; that goes there now hdbdb#//do I need to tag for the dark humor. and if so how#//Anywho back on subject; Kae would crack jokes abt this to exceedingly close ppl like Jean or Varka; too#//He got a MASSIVE lecture from each of them the first and only times he cracked that sort of joke#//Abt how important he in fact rlly IS to them; and misery is the LAST thing he’d EVER give them#//Which hurt him more than them insulting or denouncing him bc NOW he feels guilty & anxious#//Like he feels he inevitably WILL bring them misery; no matter how hard he strives otherwise#//And boy oh BOY would he try to avoid it for them in particular; just as he would Addie and Elzer#//Luc; he’s just being a LIL bit spiteful; LIL bit attention seeking#//Getting attention/keeping him in his life the best way he knows how without worrying Luc will see it as a sign to try & bridge the gap
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Hisuian Zoroark is one of the sickest designs in pokemon, but the model on that bloke is FUCKED. It's really bad. If they bother to port her over to other games, you know they ain't changing that model, either, 'cept to make the textures paler & duller.
I continue to despise pokemon, despite being a pokemon fan, I fucken guess. At this point, I gotta go all in on summat else, like Cassette beasts.
#gale chatter#i have MINOR problems with the beasts but they are nothing + I ain't abt to be negative abt it online#it's a good game made by good people my complaints are so tiny you NEED to play it#if you like me wish pokemon would do more fun interesting things or miss spritework in ur pokemon#u need to try cassette beasts. I'll admit i haven't beaten it but what I've seen in the story is INSANE#also i generally try not to talk smack about indie games it just ain't right. biggest ip on the planet‚ however‚#i can talk shit about pokemon all damn day.#the fucking way they keep using the same models the most minimal of animations & the pokemon keep getting pale as shit#to the point that pokemon like pichu are fucken impossible to tell from their shiny (slightly paler pichu)#the way that the designs are done in 2D & designed in it but then when it comes time to model they just. lose all charm#you get designs that were obviously not intended to have full 360 turnabouts (h. zoroark & emboar)#then you get deisgns that lose all their charm when modeled. in example -- look at the boltund model next to the art.#it's. bad. those are different animals. i feel NOTHING for the boltund model. it has no heart nor care in it just a means to an end#the gameplay never changes the sories have ALWAYS been lackluster they introduce cool ideas every other gen & ABANDON THEM#SO YOU HAVE A REASON TO BUY THE NEXT ONE BC IT HAS A NEW IDEA. MEGA EVOS WHAT'S THAT? DYNAMAX NOW.#the way they slice up the games to have exclusives SPECIFICALLY to piecemeal them back to you in 2 different games#so you either need to buy both (THAT IS 120 DOLLARS) or pay for online + have a friend. it has always been predatory.#it's. BAD.#& let's not pretend that 1/2 the lazy work is because the workers HAVE to be lazy. they pump these games out so fast that#nobody has time to write & revise & rewrite the stories which is fucking GLARING when you play sword or violet#in violet it is blatantly obvious they had the end planned first & then made up the rest as they went but had a hard time#connecting it back to the end so there's a noteable rush in the game & it sucks also if you call that game nonlinear i will attack you#IT ISN'T. IT IS DESIGNED SO THAT YOU NEED. TO GO IN A SPECIFIC ORDER. BECAUSE OF THE LEVELS#otherwise you'll hit a lvl 60 gym at lvl 40 then have to go back to fight the lvl 40 gym at lvl 70#the studio rushes their workers & it results in sloppy implimentation of halfbaked mechanics & poor deisgns & writing#i pray that if there is a god that nintendo actually does slow down on these shits i would like the games my little cousins play#to not be such fucken rushed & undercooked hot garbage. fuck you
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ive set a monday alarm to go to the doctor because im so fucking depressed i cant imagine anything worthwhile about tomorrow so. wish me luck babes im gonna try really hard to go at all, for a referral to a new psyche+maybe therapist i desperately need meds
#every once in a while i think. what the fuck is wrong with me why cant i just. live like others do#and its like. ohhh ive been unmedicated for goin on 4 years now an that directly corresponds to how little ive been able to do in that time#unmedicated depression+anxiety + untreated agoraphobia is quite literally killing me#sorry to be so depressing on here but i just. dont want any of my friends to wonder where i am one day#im just trying to post stuff so i have to stick to going to the doctor#cause i wanna be okay n shit#no plans to go anywhere rn but im pretty passively suicidal#so ya im just. trying to be okay rn. really fucken hard#not a lot worth it rn. not very wanted around anyways. irl at least. sucks.#not to sound hopeless but ya im just tryin to have Some hope ig#ough. fuck man. its been a long time since ive been this bad off#it was comin and i knew it especially cold turkey off meds but. goddamn i really hoped i could get on meds b4 i got this bad#://////
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i think a big part of the reason i need to spend so much time alone is that i mask so much to account for my inability to interact with life in a rational manner that i can’t ever entirely relax if other people are around. i need alone time so i can just not fucken worry about how i’m acting. nobody knows the real me because i don’t let her out.
#the other day my therapist was like ‘wait are you stressing yourself out with your thoughts?’#and the masking is so strong that i just clamped down on the reflex to go ‘WELL OBVIOUSLY??’#this is why i need therapy! this is why every day in my brain is an agony of a fucken mess ajdnsnf#i literally don’t know how to be a human being#i was just like ‘hmmm…’#like. that would be the time to say something skfjsng#but i can’t! bc the Real Me doesn’t get to talk#maybe the cbt log will help#consistent personal tag
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driving into the city tomorrow and i ammmm terrified </3 i am always always so paranoid about driving i wish i had sides like sanders sides so i could throw a weighted blanket over my anxiety and make him have a nap and stop making me lose my marbles
#whiskey yelling into the void#also i just found out a lot of just dance songs aren't on spotify. pain and suffring#sitting in my fucken rocking chair steadily working myself into a panic over getting into a wreck on the highway while-#blasting hot for me by aka in my headphones on youtube complete with the just dance sound effects and staring into space#every time i get nervous abt driving like this i'm like hmmm what could possibly be causing this??? who knows!!!#and then i remember my accident from last march and i'm like ah. it's. because of that. yeah#my brother says it's trauma but no one got hurt and no one died so literally i don't know what could possibly have caused any trauma#the car flipped on its side yeah but like girl i'm fine. everyone's fine. WHO CARES!!!!! I SHOULDN'T!!!!!! I DON'T!!!!#anyway does anyone remember dance all nite by anja??? shit slaps i wish i could put it on my playlists i still remember the choreography
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This succession episode was straight up toxic why did noone warn me
#barking#fucken roman. romans really getting it this season#greg is so gross he makes me wanna puke every time i see him its crazy
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Emetophobia warning
Ever since i experienced paxil withdrawals and was throwing up like 5 times a week for a month and then weekly for a month after that, ive gotten really chill with it and i can kind of tell far in advanced if its happening. In these cases i'll treat it like a spa day lol not like this is fun for me but i can set up all my amenities; damp washcloth, water bottle, put my hair up in clips and a scrunchie, maybe something to sit on, something to read on my phone. Makes the process much less horrifying and prevents the anxiety that comes from rushing or franticness
#i used to have so much insane emetophobia it was debilitating for me socially physically emotionally#over time it lessened and then when i had the great Meds Fuckening of 2021 that frankly ruined me for 4 months#it became very chill very quickly#and now that i fight it less and its less stressful on my body and mind#idk if this is something i recommend fjkakckskd like this isnt something yoh should try to practice for????#but if u do have a phobia or just a lot of anxiety about it it might be good to just learn to relax your body and hold less tension#and youll find it helps a lot#generally just making it less big of a deal so u dont freak out#written from the floor of my bathroom 👍#emeto warning#emeto#emetophobia#tw emetophobia#tw vomiting#gross#unsanitary#trying to put Every Tag bc i get it#this could potentially trigger bulimia i feel?#eating disorder#bulimia#i am not bulimic just fyi i just dont want to trigger anyone!!! no worries no worries
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youtube
I wish I could have sex with this song
#bad omens#video#song recs#every time it comes on im like UUUUGGGHHHHHH (horny)#the fucken drums get me every time but also everything else about it#Youtube
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Thinking of Kaveh with Unhinged partners again
#//By that; I mean partners who commit the Violences and deadly Chaoses#//Furthermore; said Violences being done upon other ppl bc that person is a Fighter with a side of bloodlust & destruction#//HIs every opposite in damn near every way#��� ┆ ( .ooc. );#//So lik#//I watched a Wu of the Wa playthrough#//And I fucken LAUGH#//Now Kav is not so dumb he would be FOOLED into thinking they are innocent#//But like#//Them deffo having an on-off thing bc they still manage to worm their way into his heart time and heckin again#//Him continuing to think 'This is the LAST fucken straw; I CANNOT be with sb like his'#//They proceed to show up wounded to his window and tell him they need a quick lil hand and will be on their merry way#//Read: it takes TWOmins of Kav is grumbling & patching them up before they kiss again & Kav thinks to himself MAYBE they can behave#//Then proceeds to get disappointed again when Cy drops news he's hunting them again for Crimes#//Person is a sweetheart to him; or maybe a mischievous lil menace that pushes his buttons to hell and back; but would Never hurt him#//But he HAS to try and draw a line#//But cannot#//Bro is weak for bad boys; and he is fucken PISSED abt it#//Anyway; imma read some k4vet4ru fics I found#//Bc that's the closest to canon I'll get to this ig dkjgbtfg#//And I don't wanna write a particular ship fic rn#//Mostly bc I am already writing one rn actually#//Bc the thought came to me and it Is a bit of a heavy one#//Bc my brain is just 'Hey; you love this blorbo? Corner him'#//Make the guy feel like a prey animal in what should be the happiest time of his life#//Yup yup#//Or as I like to call it 'Why impromptu weddings are better for K4e than proper engagements; etc'#//But thas an update; anywho#//I think a s/o who is absolutely Sc4r Wu of the Waa levels of unhinged would be funny for Kav#//It would not fix him; prolly make him worse & stressed beyond fucken relief. But it would be funny. TO ME lol
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“kuna,” you start off, laying across from him, tapping him with your foot. “can i ask you something?”
he pulls back and scrunches up his face. “girl what, and dont touch me with your nasty ass feet.” he sees your face scrunch up too, like you about to chuck your phone at him.
“am i your favorite?”
he looks at you and his lip curls up. “what?”
“am i your favorite person or something..?” you asked , looking at him. you hear him sigh through his nose, pinching the bridge. “okay, nevermind then, shit.” you say, already fed up and sick of his shit. a beat of silence goes by, and he starts again.
“youre.. not too bad i guess.” he starts, not looking at you and only at his phone. he still had a hard time, since he found being on his phone boring. (he doesnt, youll catch him being on tiktok.) “you look good.”
“thats it?–“ you ask, before he cuts you off.
“shut the hell up so i can finish?” he says, knowing that immediately puts him on thin ice. “well.. you also uh, at least give me a chance.” he says, scrolling on the settings app (he does this when he knows youre looking so you cant see him on tiktok) “and i guess you dont annoy me like my other hoes did.” that could be a lie.
“you say i annoy you every day every hour??” you question, being completely confused. this man had to be bipolar.
“not like annoyed annoyed, but annoyed. you know what i mean!” he shouts.
“i truly dont.” you say, chuckling. you did , but you liked when he explained things.
“ion gotta explain myself to you, woman! just.. know youre cool to be around and youre not too bad. sure you can be a nuisance but—“ you cut him off by laying on his back, intruding on his personal space. “get off!” he yells.
“nope, admit you love me.”
“get. off.” he warns, he had no problem with throwing you off either.
“say it.” you said, pinching his sides, knowing it barely does anything.
“jesus fuckin– okay! i love you woman.” he said, dropping his face into the pillows. he tried not to laugh, because fuck, you’re ridiculous. you rolled off of him, and he looks at you. “gimmie my fucken kiss.”
#jjk x reader#jjk spoilers#jjk#jjk x you#jjk leaks#sukuna x you#jjk sukuna#jujustsu kaisen x reader#ryomen sukuna#sukuna#sukuna x reader#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fanart
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No because then I get to mock my character relentlessly, mimicking their goofy voice in the process.
Just learned that most of my friends keep the WoW error speech on when playing and I feel like I have been playing with complete strangers for 10+ years. That is easily the first dumb little inconvenience I turn off when I reinstall the game. Don't you think it's obnoxious when your character goes :( I CAN'T CAST THAT? as you're hammering the ever loving piss out of your Shadowbolt button????
#AH CANNAE ATTAK TAT#AM OOT O RAENHGE#funniest shit#blood elf male locked item error message gets me every time#just the tenor of how he goes 'its locked!' fucken gets me man#warcraft#nelf female... 'That. would be STEALINK.'
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