#genuinely for years i made an oath with myself to never speak about the show again for some reason. prob bc i was a cringe aah third grader.

[hilacopter]

mutuals (beloved) keep putting mlb stuff on my dash and i'm getting flashbacks to my ten year old self

[emilyhufflepufftlk]

A Cruel Game | Sihtric x OC

In celebration of @for-bebbanburg’s well deserved 100 followers.

Prompt: ‘being ordered to kill someone you’ve fallen in love with. How did you get into this situation and what will you do next?’

Tove, one of Kjartan's best warriors, is sent to kill Sihtric after he defects to Uhtred. However, her feelings for him get in the way.

Word Count: 2926

‘There are only seven heads! Go out there and tell me who is missing!’ Kjartan screamed at the closest guard. The poor man looked terrified; the last man that had been sent beyond Dunholm’s walls had been beheaded by a horseman sent from corpse hall to take all their souls. He looked like he was going to refuse but one look at his lord clearly made him remember that Kjartan was willing to inflict just as much pain on his men as any demon horseman. The great doors creaked open and the poor man scampered along the line of spiked heads, his eyes constantly darting to the tree line in case the horseman should return.

‘Sihtric, lord,’ the man shouted back. ‘It is Sihtric that is missing!’

Three days had passed since the heads had appeared outside the walls of Dunholm. Three days Kjartan had spent in a seething rage. Whether his rage was due to him losing some of his best men, his plans to finally get revenge on Uhtred Ragnarson having failed, or the unknown whereabouts of his bastard son, no one was sure. Tove thought it was probably a combination of all three.

Tove had known Kjartan her whole life. Her father had been one of his most trusted, loyal warriors who had been by his side since the days he had served Ragnar the Fearless. After her father’s death in battle when she was only nine, Kjartan had taken her in out of respect for her father. Kjartan was a terrible, evil man and deserved his title as Kjartan the Cruel, but it seemed to Tove that he had genuinely liked and cared for her father. Tove, on the other hand, Kjartan neither liked nor cared for, but he had given her food and a roof over her head, he had let her train and learn to fight, and he had prevented any of his men from using her against her will. Tove owed Kjartan a lot, without him she would have been destitute with no family to turn to; she may not like him, she despised him even, but in many ways she was indebted to him.

‘The bastard has betrayed me!’ Kjartan roared, banging his first on the table. ‘He is probably telling Uhtred about our defences as we speak! I should have had him killed ages ago, like I did his mother.’

Tove flinched. When she had first arrived, she had been terrified. Kjartan, thinking little of her, had told her to sleep with the slaves and that is what she had done. Sihtric’s mother, Elflaed, had cared for her the best she could, her kindness immeasurable. Her gory death had hit her hard, although not as hard as Sihtric, of course. They were a similar age, and although Tove wasn’t a slave she wasn’t treated much better; Sihtric had it worse, the cruelty Kjartan showed his bastard son knowing no bounds, but they helped each other through it. She had held him in her arms the whole night as he had cried his heart out after his mother’s death, and from that night on they had only had each other.

‘We do not know he is with Uhtred,’ Sven pointed out, the only man brave enough to dare to contradict his father, ‘why would he want him? He is nothing – a nobody! He would be worthless to him.’

Tove made sure to keep her face blank, she did not wish for punishment, but inside she was laughing. Sven loved to say that Sihtric was worthless, but he was a better fighter than Sven would ever be. Over the years she had known him, Sihtric had grown into a man and a great warrior. She was sure Elflaed would’ve been proud.

‘He is with Uhtred!’ Kjartan shouted again, giving his son a look that made it clear there was no room for argument. ‘The bastard has betrayed me! He must die!’

‘But how?’ Sven asked, never having been the smartest. ‘Uhtred won’t be taken for a fool twice.’

‘No, he won’t. That is why we will send someone he does not suspect,’ Kjartan snarled, turning to face Tove with a grin that made her blood run cold. ‘Who would suspect a woman?’

Tove was no longer the scared little girl who had first arrived at Dunholm. She had learnt that men would only respect her if she learnt how to fight, so that is what she had done, and now, nine years later, she was a shieldmaiden and one of Kjartan’s best warriors. This mission was not so difficult; sneak unnoticed into Eoferwic, locate Sihtric, kill him, and return to Kjartan with his head. But this was no simple mission. As she rode out of the gates of Dunholm, Tove’s heart was almost jumping out of her throat and she felt completely sick. For the first time in years, she was afraid. Afraid of what she must do. Sihtric wasn’t just a friend; over the years, as they had grown older, they had become far more to each other than that. In truth she loved him, although she had never told him that. However, her feelings meant nothing. She had given her oath to Kjartan, sworn her sword and there was no going back from that. She had her orders and she must complete them.

The only hope she had left was that Kjartan was wrong, that Sihtric had escaped and fled well away from Northumbria, but that hope soon disappeared. It hadn’t been difficult to slip into the city, especially under the cover of darkness, just like Tove knew it would be – people never looked twice at women, probably assuming her to be a whore. She had located Uhtred’s men quick enough and there was Sihtric, looking as handsome as ever. No, he was more handsome, as for the first time in his life he had hope in his eyes and a smile, a real smile, on his face. She couldn’t blame him for defecting; Kjartan had never given him a reason to be loyal to him and, by the looks of his men, Uhtred seemed to be a decant lord. But this changed nothing, Tove reminded herself.

When Sihtric stood and walked away from the other men, probably going to take a piss, Tove took her chance. Sticking to the shadows, careful not to be seen, she followed him into a side alley. She must have made a sound as Sihtric stopped dead still, even drunk his senses were better than anyone’s. Not even thinking about it, Tove grabbed him and pressed him against the wall, her knife against his throat. His eyes widened, ‘Tove?’ he gasped. ‘What are you doing?’

‘Kjartan wants you dead and he sent me to do his dirty work,’ she said in a flat voice, trying to keep her emotions from showing on her face.

‘You’re going to kill me?’ he asked, no fear in his eyes.

‘I do not want to, but I will,’ Tove forced herself to say through gritted teeth. She did not want to do this, but what other choice did she have? ‘Please, Sihtric, I don’t want to do this. Leave Uhtred and flee south, I can tell Kjartan that you must have escaped and ran. If I come back empty handed and he gets word that you’re here, he will kill me! You know this! You have to run! Please!’ She was begging now, her voice cracking from the emotion rising inside her.

‘I can’t,’ Sihtric whispered. ‘I have sworn to Lord Uhtred and he is a good lord, a great lord. I will not abandon him. I will not break my oath.’ Tove shook her head, her blade still against Sihtric’s skin, hating Sihtric for his loyalty, but at the same time knowing that was one of the things she loved him for. ‘Tove, you don’t have to do this. You can abandon Kjartan and join Uhtred. Join me! We can be together – isn’t that what you want?’

Tears were building in her eyes. That was exactly what she wanted but it was something she could not have. ‘I can’t, Sihtric! I have sworn to Kjartan, just like you have sworn to Uhtred! I will not be an oath breaker! I won’t!’

‘But Kjartan treats you no better than a slave! When you swore your sword, he swore to protect you in return. He is not a good lord; the Gods cannot blame you for leaving a man like that!’

‘He has protected me, Sihtric! Yes, he is a cruel, vile man. Yes, he has not treated me kindly. But if it wasn’t for him, I would be lying dead in an alleyway or selling myself in a brothel by now! Before he took me in, I had nothing! I am indebted, Sihtric!’ Tove sobbed, tears spilling over and running down her cheeks as she realised there was no way out of this situation.

‘So kill me!’ he spat.

‘I will,’ Tove spat back, trying to muster her conviction.

‘Oh, I don’t think so,’ came a deep, Danish voice from behind her. Before she could turn to see who had sneaked up behind her, a pain blazed through her skull and she felt herself falling to the ground, before it all went black.

When Tove woke up it was light outside, although it was unclear how long she had been out for. Her head was extremely painful where she had been hit with what she suspected was a blunt object. She was in what looked like an unused part of a stable, her hands and feet tied together with rope. Looking up, she saw Sihtric sitting not far from her, meeting her eye when he noticed she was awake. He passed her a jug of water before getting up and leaving her, not saying a single word.

A few moments later he returned with two men. She was informed that the first man was Lord Uhtred, and the other man, who was huge with arms like tree trunks, was another Dane named Clapa. It had been Clapa that had knocked her out; no wonder her head hurt so much. ‘I understand that you’re called Tove?’

‘Yes, lord.’

‘The only reason you are still alive is because of Sihtric. He seems to believe that you might consider joining us. Help us against Kjartan.’

‘I’m sorry, lord.’ Tove said slowly, not looking Sihtric in the eye. ‘I’m afraid I cannot give you my sword nor my oath as they both belong to another. It is not for any love or loyalty to Kjartan that I refuse you, lord, but I cannot break an oath. I will not. And if that means I am to die, then so be it.’

Uhtred simply nodded in response. He and Clapa left soon after, leaving Tove alone with Sihtric. He came and sat on the floor beside her and took her bound hands in his. ‘He will not kill you; he respects you for not breaking your oath.’

‘Then what will happen to me?’

‘I don’t know,’ Sihtric answered with a deep sigh. They sat together for what seemed like hours, simply holding each other close like they always did back in Dunholm whenever life turned against them. The spinners seemed to have played a cruel game with them, making them fall in love only to tear them apart. ‘You have always been there for me, always. When I dreamed of escaping Dunholm, it was always with you by my side.’

She looked into Sihtric’s beautiful, mismatched eyes. ‘Me too. I never imagined a future without you in it. I knew that the future was unlikely to be kind to us, but I always felt it didn’t matter how hard it got so long as we were together.’ Tears once again fell over the brim of Tove’s eyes. Sihtric reached up and gently wiped them away with his thumb. His hands moved to cup her face and slowly brought her towards him. Their lips met in a gentle kiss, the contact bringing all the emotions Tove had tried to bury and ignore for the last few days back to the surface. This would likely be the last time she ever got to kiss him, and she didn’t want it to end, but he forced himself way. He looked guiltily at her, like he hadn’t meant to kiss her. ‘I don’t know what will happen to you, Tove. I’m sorry.’ With that he left, leaving her alone with her tears.

A week passed and there was still no decision on what Tove’s fate would be. It seemed Uhtred had more pressing matters to be concerned with. She saw little of Sihtric and when she did, he barely spoke a word to her.

It was early in the morning when she heard a clamour outside. She could hear Uhtred’s voice calling a woman’s name: ‘Gisela’ – he sounded desperate. Something was happening. Something was wrong. She heard someone running towards her corner of the stables and a few moments later saw Sihtric panting above her.

‘You have to go, now!’ he ordered her, in a rushed whisper. He undid the ropes binding her hands and feet and pulled her with him out of the stables. They ran through small backstreets of the city, which she assumed was to prevent them from being seen, his hand still firmly holding hers.

‘Sihtric, what’s going on?’

‘Lord Uhtred has been betrayed,’ he replied, emotion clear in his voice. ‘Guthred has sold him into slavery. Lord Uhtred was protecting you, now he is gone, you have been marked for execution.’

‘Won’t you get into trouble?’ she asked him urgently. She didn’t want him to be executed in her place.

‘Everyone’s too busy in the square to be worried about us. Come on!’

They reached a small side gate, a horse held by Clapa waiting for them. ‘Sihtric…’ she began. There were so many things she wanted to tell him, so many things she wanted to thank him for, but somehow all her words became caught in her throat. She threw herself at his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck as she buried her face into his shoulder to hide her tears. ‘I love you.’

He lifted her chin so that she was once again staring into those beautiful eyes. ‘I love you too.’ She grabbed the back of his head and brought him down into a passionate kiss, trying to convey everything she wanted to say but couldn’t into the action. ‘Now go,’ he urged her as they broke apart.

Tove pulled herself onto the horse and gave Sihtric one last desperate look before kicking hard and riding off into the Northumbrian countryside.

ONE YEAR LATER:

‘Every man to the walls! We are under attack!’ Tove grabbed her sword and shield along with all the other warriors of Dunholm.

Little had changed over the last year, apart from the large scar that now framed her face – a gift from Kjartan after her failure to kill Sihtric. Only the news that Uhtred had been enslaved and living a fate worse than death had saved Tove’s life, Kjartan too busy celebrating the news to bother with her too much. She had tried to keep Sihtric from her mind, but she had failed, finding herself thinking of him most days. She had thought she would never see him again, but she had been wrong.

As she ran into the courtyard towards the walls like she had been ordered to, a cry went up that there had been a breach – the enemy were within the walls. She turned, sword and shield in hand as she readied herself to slaughter the invading warriors but stopped still in her tracks. There was Sihtric, fighting alongside Uhtred.

A huge Dane came at Sihtric from behind. Sihtric was busy fighting off two other men and would be helpless to the new threat. Her feet began moving on their own accord, her body moving faster than her brain could comprehend. Before she knew what was happening, she was drawing her sword from the Danes neck and standing before a shocked Sihtric. More of Kjartan’s men came running towards them; Tove immediately moved so she stood back to back with Sihtric, ready to cut down her former comrades.

There was no time to talk. No time to explain how over the last year she had realised that she had made a mistake, that Kjartan was unworthy of her loyalty, that she should have sworn to Uhtred and been with Sihtric. All she could do was fight. It seemed she had made her choice; she had chosen to break her oath and kill those she was supposed to fight beside; but she realised to save Sihtric, she would do anything.

After the battle, Tove found Sihtric sitting alone just outside the main gates. The fortress bringing back too many memories for him to remain inside. Tove understood that. They sat in silence for a while, Sihtric’s hand in hers, their fingers laced together. ‘What happens now?’ she finally asked.

‘I go back to Wessex with Lord Uhtred. What will you do?’

‘I would like to come with you. Serve Lord Uhtred – if he’ll have me,’ she said with a slight smile. ‘I just want to be with you.’ Sihtric beamed at her and placed his arm around her, bringing his head forward so their foreheads touched. They were together, and in that moment, that was all that mattered.

[bldgrelationshipwgod]

A person who has been participating in this area, it’s the hardest thing for them to shake off the effects. Simon got out for a little while, started preaching after being baptised, but satan still regarded Simon as his personal property.

And this I will tell you again, if you have fooled with these things: satan tonight regards you as his legitimate property; & he bitterly resents any attempt to get you out from under his clutches. I’ve proven this time & time again.

It’s extraordinarily hard for this person to genuinely repent. And without repentance, there is no permanent deliverance…

2 Timothy 3:1-5 lovers of self & lovers of money & lovers of pleasure Servants of satan withstand the truth [v.8], but they will be defeated [v.9]

But evil men & seducers [v.13] shall wax worse & worse, deceiving & being deceived. Now the word seducers is the Greek word for magicians.

So we are explicitly warned that side by side with the breakdown of human standards with conduct & morality, at the close of this age, there will be a grave increase in the satanic supernatural manifestations.

Revelations 9:20-21 | Now the rest of mankind who were not killed by these plagues still did not repent of the works of their hands. They did not stop worshiping demons & idols of gold, silver, bronze, stone, & wood, which cannot see or hear or walk. Furthermore, they did not repent of their murder, sorcery, sexual immorality, & theft.

Word sorcery is directly from the Greek word for drugs! From which we get the English word pharmacy, & the man accused of the Sharon Tate murder in California in court actually quoted this verse & said this is it.

This is the situation, murder/drugs/fornication & theft. And it’s the work of the satanic supernatural. It’s a pretty deadly thing.

So now what are we going to do about it?

1st: If you have been involved in any of these things, at any time in your life, you better make sure you’re absolutely clear that nothing is hanging on & nothing is following up, & there’s no dark shadow over you that’s going to spoil your life/future/home/family. You might shrug it off & say, “It was a joke.”

It may have been in your eyes, but it wasn’t in God’s eyes & it wasn’t in the devil’s. When you go to a fortune teller or play with the Ouija board, any of these things. What you’re doing in effect is going to a servant of satan for help.

And in that way you’re putting yourself in a legal obligation to satan. satan will not cancel that obligation until you make him do so.

To make him do so, the best procedure is to renounce that thing out loud in the presence of witnesses. Profess it as a sin, & loose yourself in the Name of Jesus.

It’s almost unbelievable how these things affect people’s lives. For instance, someone will say to me: “Every time I’m feeling really close to God & I’m really beginning to sense the Spirit of God, there’s something that comes down & shuts me off & I just never can get through to God.”

1st Q I always ask them: have you ever been to a fortune teller? 8/10 times the answer is yes.

“Oh but I only did it when I was a little girl.” “Oh it was years ago,…or I didn’t mean anything by it, it was just a joke.”

But you went & you put yourself under an obligation to satan you never cancelled.

I can tell you case after case, where this kind of darkness & heaviness over a life has been lifted by the canceling of that obligation.

Whatever it be, you have an obligation to yourself to cancel it.

Let me illustrate this: What you see & what you do is important, even if you don’t mean it. Under the pressure of the trial of Jesus, Peter 3x publicly denied that he knew Jesus. When the angel of the resurrection gave the message, the message was from Jesus: “Go & tell my disciples & Peter.” [Mark 16:7]

He was no longer a disciple; he had cancelled his discipleship; he didn’t mean it. But he had done it by what he said; & Jesus in His infinite grace & wisdom took Peter aside, then 3x made him profess out loud his love for the Lord. He had to revoke what he had said before, by the right confession.

THIS is exactly true. Getting rid of these things is almost like a divorce. It’s got to be done in a certain sense legally. You’ve got to break the connection.

I’ll just give you an example:

Lord, I confess as a sin that I went to the at fortune teller, I played with that oujia board, or I had my palm read, I studied the horoscope, & a whole dozen of things, I confess it as a sin. Lord I acknowledge that I went to a servant of satan for help. Forgive me Lord, I renounce it, I will never do it again. And I loose myself in Jesus Name every dark influence that came upon me through it.

That will do it, but if you don’t take it seriously, you’ll go on suffering. The curse is revoked in Christ, but you’ve got to enter into that revocation of it.

2nd if you have any literature or other objects, that speak of any satanic cults or worship burn them. Preferably tonight, don’t give them away. Burn them.

This is Scriptural, Exodus 19, the believers brought the books they had & burned them, $20K worth of books.

If you have idols, Buddhas, anything that was made to worship or an honour to some satanic being break it, burn it, throw it out. Get

Things will change because satan was brought out into the open.

>> This is your responsibility to pray for your nation. Pray everyday for your government, & for those in authority. Most Christians haven’t even begun to do it; the Bible places on Christians the obligation to intercede for the gov’t; & you are given power: “Whatsoever you will bind on earth, shall be bound in heaven. Whatsoever you loose on earth, shall be loosed in heaven.”

You do not need to tolerate the satanic conditions & satanic invasion, to which your country is subjected. You have the means, at your disposal to change the situation. It is a spiritual condition & it is resolved by spiritual means.

And the spiritual means are at the hands of the Christians. Not the unbeliever. If we do not use it, my conviction is your country will perish. I do not say that idly.

I’m firmly convinced that this decade will solve the destiny of America, one way of the other. And even papers like TIME & LIFE that certainly are not slanted in the spiritual direction, have come up with virtually the same conclusion.

How many of you tonight would say, “Brother Prince, I’ll accept my responsibility from tonight onwards as I’m taught in the Bible & as the Holy Spirit guides me to pray for my gov’t & my nation.” God bless you.

You do not need to let the devil parade up & down your streets. It is not necessary, he is a defeated foe!

>> But Jesus has left it to us to administer the DEFEAT!

When Jesus left to be seated on the THRONE, He said all power has been given unto Me in heaven & on earth, go ye therefore & go do something about it!

And He’s been waiting 19 centuries for people to realize what He meant.

Here’s the final question:

Those of you, who know you’ve given the devil some area of your life, some time in your life: You’ve crossed the border into the wrong spiritual realm, you’ve fooled around with cults & things, I’ve specified them long enough!

And tonight you want to know as you go out of here that you’re totally clear & free of all that.                   _____________________________________________________

You shall have no other gods before Me. You shall not make for yourself an idol of any kind, or an image of anything in the heavens above, on the earth beneath, or in the waters below.

You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on their children to the 3rd & 4th generations of those who hate Me, [Exodus 20:3-26]

Matthew Henry Commentary | Exodus 20:3-11

The 1st four of the 10 commandments, commonly called the FIRST table, tell our duty to God.

It was fit that those should be put first, because man had a Maker to love, before he had a neighbour to love.

It cannot be expected that you should be true to your brother, who is false to his God.

1st commandment concerns the object of worship, JEHOVAH, & Him only.

The worship of creatures is here forbidden. Whatever comes short of perfect love, gratitude, reverence, or worship, breaks this commandment.

Whatsoever you do, do all the glory of God.

2nd law refers to the worship we are to render to the Lord our God.

It is forbidden to make any image or picture of the Deity, in any form, or for any purpose; or to worship any creature, image, or picture.

But the spiritual import of this command extends much further. All kinds of superstition are here forbidden, & the using of mere human inventions in the worship of God.

3rd law concerns the manner of worship, that it be with all possible reverence & seriousness. All false oaths are forbidden

All light appealing to God, all profane cursing, is a horrid breach of this command.

It matters not whether the word of God, or sacred things, all such-like things break this commandment, & there is no profit, honour, or pleasure in them.

The Lord will not hold him guiltless that takes His name in vain.

4th commandment, Remember, shows that it was not now first given, but was known by the people before.

One day in seven is to be kept holy. Six days are allotted to worldly business, but not so as to neglect the service of God, & the care of our souls.

On those days we must do all our work, & leave none to be done on the sabbath day. Christ allowed works of necessity, charity, & piety; for the sabbath was made for man, & not man for the sabbath,

Mark 2:27; but all works of luxury, vanity, or self-indulgence in any form, are forbidden.

Trading, paying wages, settling accounts, writing letters of business, worldly studies, trifling visits, journeys, or light conversation, are not keeping this day holy to the Lord.

Sloth & indolence may be a carnal, but not a holy rest. The sabbath of the Lord should be a day of rest from worldly labour, & a rest in the service of God.

The advantages from the due keeping of this holy day, were it only to the health & happiness of mankind, with the time it affords for taking care of the soul, show the excellency of this commandment.

The day is blessed; men are blessed by it, & in it. The blessing & direction to keep holy are not limited to the seventh day, but are spoken of the sabbath day.

Colossians 3:2 | Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. [This pairs nicely with keeping the Sabbath Holy]

(Source: youtube.com, via john8-32)

#curses #https://tmblr.co/Z4OMrV2lrj47h

[velvetcream03-blog]

Why Are Men Still Voting Republican?

In the month or so that's led up to the midterm elections, here's a snapshot of just a few things that made headlines: The President of the United States called Stormy Daniels “horseface.” An ex–Trump campaign staffer slammed Beto O’Rourke, the Democratic candidate for Senate in Texas, as a “beta male." Almost the entire Republican establishment banded together to nominate a man accused of sexual assault to the highest court in the land. After that, the President publicly mocked the woman who testified under oath against him. That man was confirmed, by the way.

And an NPR-Ipsos poll released this week showed that over 40 percent of Americans believe the Me Too movement has "gone too far," with a full 77 percent of Republicans responding that false accusations are "common." (Not true.) Which of course comes after the President of the United States came out with this gem: “It’s a very scary time for young men,” Trump said in an address to reporters on the White House lawn earlier this month.

Taken together, the moments suggest a unified approach, and one that others have noticed too. The GOP’s strategy leading up to the midterms is not their usual proposal for jobs, national security, or even small government; their sales pitch is toxic masculinity. Some suspect that this could cost them valuable female voters at the polls. And the numbers suggest a modest exodus of women from the GOP is happening. Over the summer support for Republican candidates from Republican women plummeted by 11 points.

As we’ve gotten closer to this election, the gender gap has widened. Still, in all the examination over whether conservative women will or will not elect Republican candidates, there's been less vocal concern that Republicans could lose the support of men. We expect that men will stick with a power structure and a raft of terrible ideologies that serve them. That's sad.

The GOP’s strategy leading up to the midterms is not their usual proposal for jobs, national security, or even small government; their sales pitch is toxic masculinity.

And it's not the first time I've witnessed it. Just before the 2016 election, I was reporting from one of Donald Trump’s last campaign rallies in Berwyn, Pennsylvania. An infamous Gallup poll that showed seven out of 10 women had an unfavorable view of Trump had been cited ad nauseam in the national media for months. I went to Pennsylvania to speak to women who did support Trump. Almost 24 months later, one white middle-aged woman's comments have stuck with me. I raised the poll, and she paused and said, “I think seven out of 10 women probably have an unfavorable view of a lot of men.” The implication? That hasn’t stopped them from associating with terrible men before.

In that moment, I felt bad for women. But I felt sadder for men. This woman wasn’t supporting Donald Trump because she had a high opinion of him; she was supporting him because she had such a low opinion of men.

Ever since, Donald Trump has become the ultimate poster boy for toxic masculinity. And all the while, his fellow Republicans have proudly followed his lead. The case of now Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh's confirmation to the bench is a perfect example. At the time Representative Steve King (R–Iowa) said that if the “new standard” for nominees is to never have been accused of sexual assault, “no man [would] ever qualify” for the Supreme Court of the United States again. Rep. Kevin Cramer (R–N.D.), a current Senate candidate, took it one step further, telling reporters, “Even if it's all true, does it disqualify him?” And Joe Walsh, a former Republican congressman, tweeted, “If stupid, bad, or drunken behavior as a minor back in high school were the standard, every male politician in Washington, D.C., would fail.”

Are all men really comfortable with this characterization of their entire gender? And if it's not this, then what it would take for them to abandon the GOP? Because as it stands now, the GOP isn’t just sending a message to girls that their pain is no match for a man’s ambitions. It’s also sending an insidious signal to boys—you're hardwired to be bad, so why bother trying to be good?

So far conservative men have stayed loyal to the Republican Party. In fact, the 2018 midterm election is expected to have a record-breaking gender gap. While Democrats hold a massive 30-point lead over Republicans in terms of female voters, the Republicans have an eight point advantage with male voters.

Is there even some fraction of Republican men who wants to raise the bar of expectations for what it means to be a man in 2018?

But some men are starting to leave the party over its establishment's relentless misogyny. Cameron, a 26-year-old investment banker and registered Republican, said that the message that men "can't help themselves" or that all men mistreat women is "ridiculous."

“That's absurd," he said. "Whoever believes that wasn’t raised properly. [Saying] ‘Boys will be boys’ about things like assault is, frankly, genuinely insulting.” He added that it promoted “abuse toward women” and said he felt “sad that the people who represent my party grew up like that.”

Although he hasn’t decided how he’ll vote in the midterms, he said he's unlikely to vote for a Republican. “I wouldn’t feel comfortable with myself knowing that I supported a candidate with those kinds of values,” he explained. “You don’t have my vote.”

I heard similar frustrations from Emerson, a 32-year-old registered Republican who lives in Georgia. While he said he tends to be politically active, he hasn’t decided whether he’ll vote Republican next week. When I asked him about the Kavanaugh hearings, he said he’d been “very uncomfortable with the entire experience.” The confirmation process, he said, undid what progress Republicans and the nation writ large had made when it comes to gender equality. “We have had a huge national discussion about how common [it is that] women are victimized. The #MeToo movement was all about that,” he said. “Everyone learned that every woman they know has been a victim.” When I asked him how he felt in the last few weeks, he exhaled. “Existentially sad,” he said. “It’s been soul-crushing to watch this happen.”

Quardricos Driskell, who teaches legislative affairs at George Washington University and is also a registered Republican, believes that the Kavanaugh hearings are a sign of a deeply rooted and systemic problem for the Republican Party that will only continue to grow. “The senators are protecting him because in many ways they are just like him; he is apart of the same or similar [ilk],” he wrote over email. “The entire hearing is symptomatic of larger issues in America—race, patriarchy, and class.”

“Men don’t need to be afraid, especially white men,” Driskell said, responding to Trump’s cautioning. “Cynically, this notion of men being afraid of women accusing them and being scared for their boys is the genesis of a future Gilead…. Patriarchy is the issue here. And a complete disregard for women and victims.”

Millennial women are leaving the GOP in droves, and there’s even some indication that married (white) women, a usual stronghold for Republicans, are backing away. A million headlines have told us in no uncertain terms that women are powering the resistance, that suburban white women could cost the Republicans their congressional muscle, that more women than ever are running and winning.

But what about the men? Is there even some fraction of Republican men who want to raise the bar of expectations for what it means to be a man in 2018? (We know some Democratic men are out there. “I have been troubled by the excuse offered by too many that this was a high school incident and ‘boys will be boys,’” said Senator Chris Coons, a Democrat from Connecticut, when Ford testified in the Senate. “To me that’s just far too low a standard for the conduct of boys and men in our country.”)

The 2016 presidential race produced the largest electoral gender gap of all time, and experts have predicted even that spread will be topped in the 2018 midterm elections. White women may at last start to leave the Republican Party in consequential numbers, recognizing that proximity to power (their husbands, their fathers) is not the same as genuine equality. Women may reject the GOP’s toxic masculinity platform. When, if ever, will men?

Liz Plank is an award-winning journalist and the executive producer of Divided States of Women at Vox Media

In a pivotal election year, Glamour is keeping track of the historic number of women running (and voting) in the midterm elections. For more on our latest midterm coverage, visit glamour.com/midterms.

Source: https://www.glamour.com/story/why-are-men-still-voting-republican