#gah tragic siblings have ruined me again

[madbard]

Thinking about how nobody noticed Ford had been replaced. Sure, Stan’s a talented con-man, and sure, he would have been careful to keep them away.

But no one in town realized he wasn’t the scientist, because Ford never went into the town. His best friend chose to forget he had ever existed. His family didn’t realize he’d swapped places with his brother, which means they were either already distant before the portal incident, or they just. Looked “Ford” directly in the eye. And did not recognize him.

The child raised to believe he was only valuable because his intellect could produce money for his family, grew to be a man so singlemindedly focused on his research that he ended up completely alone.

A man who vanished into thin air, with only his estranged brother to grieve him.

[nitewrighter]

Gency Week Day 2: “Snow”

Some goofy ensemble-y stuff featuring snowball fights and two of my other fave ships.

----

The sky was white and steel-gray, framed by the dark pines of the black forest. Snowflakes were falling softly on the ruined buildings, and sliding down from tree boughs in cascades of white.

“And so we find ourselves here again, Brother,” Hanzo stood atop a creaking wooden balcony, his voice was clear but muted by the snow all around them, “It seems we cannot escape our fate.”

“All of that time on the Watchpoint…” Genji spoke up to him, his ribbon and a knit scarf wafting in the winter wind, “All of your efforts to forgive and redeem yourself, did it all mean nothing to you?”

“All that has ever mattered to me, Genji, is victory,” said Hanzo, “I do what I must.”

“Brother! No!” shouted Genji, and he ducked out of the way of a snowball, which exploded into powder on a tree trunk behind him. Genji did several artful flips and dodges out of the next barrage of snowballs, taking cover behind the wreckage of a bastion unit and feverishly rolling up snowballs himself.

“So he’s just… incapable of taking anything lightly?” said Mercy, packing up snowballs next to him.

“This is Hanzo we’re talking about,” said Genji, “But there is conflict in his heart! I can see it in his eyes,” he gripped her shoulders, his visor bright, “We may still win the day! Trust me.”

“…Genji, it’s a snowball fight,” said Mercy, setting another snowball on the pile.

—

“I think you two get a little too into this,” said McCree, clambering up onto the balcony next to Hanzo but Hanzo held up a hand and McCree went silent.

“Ours is a long and troubled history–with that single snowball, a deep-set rivalry has been reignited,” Hanzo’s voice was deep, grim, and Jesse would be lying if he said he wasn’t really into that, yet the context of this tone was a little concerning.

“Because you didn’t have a rivalry before…?” McCree tugged at his single mitten, not bothering to keep his prosthetic warm.

“In the winter of twenty seven years ago—” Hanzo began.

“Darlin’ we’re in the middle of a snowball fight–you don’t need a tragic backstory for–”

“An atmospheric anomaly buried Hanamura in no less than 9 inches of snow in two days. The snowball fight that ensued between Genji and I is one only whispered of in Shimada legend–”

“Again–siblings–you don’t really have to–”

“So furious was our feuding that our father, Sojiro, forced us both to declare armistice and shake hands. And so the peace has been kept–”

“Except for that bit where you uh… killed him.”

“—for 27 years. But this day… that peace is broken.”

“Well you know you always got me backin’ you up,” said McCree with a grin.

“You grew up in a desert,” said Hanzo, packing more snow.

“Well yeah but back when we were kids Ashe dragged me up for a winter or two at her folks’ cabins in Vail, so I know my way around—”

McCree got creamed hard in the side of the head with a snowball so hard his hat got knocked off, shock written in every one of his features as he was thrown off balance and fell on his side with a grunt.

“Jesse!” Hanzo cried out in alarm only to hear a sneering laugh and a whispery chuckle fill the air. Hanzo looked up to see Widowmaker, perched on the half-collapsed  roof of an opposite building, a grin on her face and a small stockpile of snowballs near her feet.

“Americans,” she said with a superior smile.

“Ah, shit it went down my shirt…” McCree grunted as he got up, brushing snow out of his hair and getting his hat back on.

“I will avenge you,” Hanzo said, his eyes narrowing at Widowmaker.

“Be on your toes, Sombra’s never far behind her,” muttered McCree, picking up a snowball.

–—

“Why did you throw that snowball at him!?” Genji said, packing more snow.

“I was aiming for Jesse!” Mercy pressed her mittened hands to her forehead.

“Let me rephrase that: Why did you immediately point at me and say ‘He did it’ when Hanzo turned around?”

“You’re brothers. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal…” said Mercy with a shrug, “And when Hanzo… glares at you like that–” she shuddered a little “Hoo! It was kind of a gut reaction.”

“You have set in motion something much bigger than you realize,” said Genji, putting a thinly gloved hand on the side of her face, his prosthetic cool through the cloth, “I don’t know if I can protect you.”

“…Genji, I feel the need to once again remind you that this is a snowball fight,” said Mercy, flatly.

“And some people don’t like playing fair,” said Sombra, appearing in a haze of violet pixels with an armful of snowballs.

Mercy shrieked and threw a snowball, hitting Sombra in the face.

“Gah!” Sombra translocated in a purple flash.

“Oh I hate that thermoptic cloaking!” said Mercy, “Now I’m going to be on edge this whole time!”

“At least she always translocates if you manage to hit her,” said Genji.

Somba reappeared next to Widowmaker on the roof in another purple flash.

“Arañaaaaaa,” she moaned from behind Widowmaker.

“What is it?” said Widowmaker, her tactical visor down.

“I got hit in the face. Comfort me,” said Sombra.

“There there,” Widowmaker said flatly, “Now go flank. I’m busy looking for the archer.”

“Stupid sniper rivalry,” Sombra muttered under her breath as she reactivated her thermoptic cloaking.

Widowmaker scoffed and rolled her eyes, “As if I would consider someone who uses a paléolithique weapon like that my rival. He’s little more than an annoying—”  A snowball whizzed past her head and she ducked down, “He’s just given away his position!” she said fiercely before grabbing snowballs and firing away.

Both Hanzo and McCree ducked, leapt, and rolled out of the onslaught of snowballs, McCree taking another shot in the shoulder, and Hanzo getting pelted in the ribs. They hid behind the half-collapsed wall of a building, a powderball exploding on the bricks behind them.

“Almost have an angle…” Genji said quietly, sneaking through the pines, “Almost—“ he saw Hanzo’s hair ribbon wafting n the breeze and his visor tightened, “There!” He dove out from his tree cover and threw a snowball at Hanzo, only for it to explode in mid-air only a few feet in front of him.

“Ay—Mierda!” Sombra’s thermoptic cloaking came off, revealing powder all over the front of her coat, “You got me in the boob!”

“Well I didn’t see you there, obviousl—Oh no,” Genji’s attention turned to Widowmaker on her perch, snowballs in hand and death in her eyes.

“Oh now you care,” said Sombra, putting her hands on her hips and looking up at Widowmaker. Widowmaker’s eyes narrowed.

“Genji look out!” Mercy tackled him out of the way of another snowball and he pulled her to her feet as they both started running, both Sombra and Widowmaker’s snowballs smacking them both in the back. Genji knew they were in Hanzo’s line of sight as well now, they reeled around another building only for both of them to run headlong into Jack and Zenyatta.

“Sorry—” Genji scrambled to get off of Jack while Mercy helped Zenyatta pick up some of his orbs from out of the snow from their impact.

“The hell is going on?” said Jack, “You were supposed to rendezvous at the Orca half an hour ago.”

Genji and Mercy started talking at the same time.

“Ah yes, well Angela threw a snowball—“

“Jesse said I was being ‘uptight’ so—”

“And then it hit Hanzo—”

“And Hanzo is taking this far too seriously—”

“Okay—Look,” Jack started, “Can you talk one at a—”

“It’s hiiiiigh nooooon.”

“What?” Jack looked up and only saw McCree’s outline against the white winter sun for half a second before Jack, Genji, Mercy, and Zenyatta were all pelted in the face with snowballs.

“How—Pfft—“ Mercy brushed some snow away from her mouth, “How does he even do that?! They’re snowballs!”

“He says he’ll tell me when I tell him what the Dragons are,” said Genji.

Mercy scoffed and then looked over at Jack, who was brushing snow away from the edges of his tactical visor.

“Uh, Jack?” Mercy started.

“I didn’t start this war,” Jack said, packing up some snow and standing up. He turned on his tactical visor. “But I’m damn well going to finish it.”

“Agreed,” Zenyatta floated up next to him, snowballs gripped in his multiple transcendence arms, “I believe this team could use a lesson in humility.”

“…Run?” said Mercy.

“Run,” agreed Genji.

They both took off sprinting for the orca as the Black Forest became a storm of snowballs behind them.

[bolbianddolanhouse]

BNHA self insert AU

Nani the heck is this? Read here!

Chapter 9: Jealousy is a Disease, Get Better Bitch

It’s 3 weeks into term 2 and Mirio and I are the main talk of the school. Iida is still feeling the regret of not speaking up. Muffin 2.0 has an attachment to me and is my assistant and security robot. Important exams are coming up for the intelligence program and more training is required. 

-Wednesday in Weaponry-

“Ok let’s review class! When I say a weapon, you present it.” commanded Diya sensei.

“YES SIR!”

“Ok, present straight blade.”

Class presents the correct blade.

“Present brass knuckles”

Everyone but me gets it wrong.

“Really? its literally the only one that has finger holes!” said sensei rubbing his temples “everyone but Palma take a lap!”

“YES SIR!” everyone runs off to do their punishment.

“Palma, come here.” 

I get sweaty “yes sir.”

“Now you are doing amazingly well into this term, I was wondering if you could do more training with the hero 1-A class since you need the copy practice.”

“More practice as in, scheduled training?”

“Yes, if you accept I can talk it over with Aizawa on which days so you can have the full schedule of things.”

“I accept!”

“Great! Another thing, you are a strong contender along with Oleshin and Matsui to take the labyrinth and pro-take down practice tests.”

“Oh? I thought only third years take those tests to get into branch academies?”

“Yes but you 3 as a squadron can take the practice tests so in third year you can take the actual test and get into top academies, like at country level agency.”

“That’s quite the honor! I will train my hardest to bring honor to our program.”

“That’s what I like to hear!”

The rest of class continues as usual and Diya tells Mimi and Jin about the practice tests. They also accept the challenge and we get excited about special moves and combos we could do. The rest of the class gets envious of us but we don’t care.

-Meanwhile in the hero 1-A classroom, before I arrive-

“Gah! did you guys hear what Mirio said in the hall in the morning when that one guy was pestering Palma-san?!” said Hagakure.

“I’m getting sick of hearing about this Mirio, unless Palma-san talks about the steamy details about their dates and sessions.” said Bakugo

“Seeing them walk to school holding hands makes me want to have that too” swooned Uraraka.

“Have you seen them training?! He can bench press her!” fanboy’d Kirishima “So manly! Palma-san picked the manliest one of them all!”

Iida was just sitting there, getting jealous that she chose such a person when he knows her secrets. He felt guilty but he wished they would break up so he can swoop in and take his chance. I teleported in.

“Hello everyone!” I said with a warm smile.

“Palma-san! You seem happier than earlier~ did Mirio do something?” asked Aoyama.

“Not this time! I have to give sensei this and I can train more with you guys!”

“Yay! I love our training sessions! You make them fun!” said Mina as she jumped.

“I’m less excited” shivered Mineta “I’m getting flashbacks to when she donkey kicked me into Sato’s ass.”  

“DON’T REMIND ME!” screamed Sato, clenching his buttcheeks “I’ll never be the same again.”

“I remember that! My best work yet” I said proudly “my dad taught me how to donkey kick.”

“Why is it every time you show us a useful skill, your father was the one that taught you?” questioned Iida.

“I was the favorite of my siblings because I was so easy to teach and had the patience to perfect these skills” I said remembering my dad “I love my dad and him showing me these skills was his way of showing me he cares for me.”

“Your dad sounds so manly!” said Kirishima “only the manliest men in Palma-san’s life!”

“I’m jealous!” spoke up Midoriya “wish my dad was around to show me useful skills.”

“yo that’s so fucking sad, you ok?” I said as the door opened.

“We’ll get started soon so take your seats” said Aizawa with a stack of papers.

“Oh sensei here, Diya sensei is putting in my request for non-grade training.” said as I handed in a manila folder with my name and program on the flap.

“Thank you Miss Palma, I’ll give these back to Diya by the end of the day.”

Class starts and the rest of the day follows as usual. It’s after school and Mirio is walking me to the dorms.

“Can I ask you something?” asked Mirio.

“Sure, ask away.”

“Why did you come over here?”

Oh boy he wants answers to that part of my file, gotta think fast “To make things short of a whole tragic story, I came over here to protect my family because there’s no hero culture in America. My school was attacked and tried to take my friends to safety but I took a bullet for a beloved teacher instead. Fearing for my family and life, I separated from them and got them relocated while I came over here. It’s was best for everyone this way.”

“That’s incredible! You’re a hero Palma-san!” exclaimed Mirio “You’re so self-less, caring and brave... true qualities of a great hero. I’m honored to be in the presence of such a heroic person.”

Oof I’m going to literally vomit “Thanks but I’m not a hero, I never wanted to be one. I was planning on being a musician or quirk researcher for medicine, that attack ruined my life.”

“But why? You clearly have the power and knowledge to be in the Top 10! Along with All Might! and myself when I finish school! Don’t you want to protect others from the evil of the world?”

I’m about to end this conversation “No, I don’t want to protect everyone because I know I can’t.”

“Well yea but-”

“Mirio, if you’re busy protecting me....then who’s protecting you? Who’s protecting your family? Who’s protecting your home? I want to be the person that protects those people because I know first hand how it is to be ripped away from your family. I know how it is to see your home get torn down with everyone still inside. I know how it is to see your role model get injured.” I started to cry “I don’t wish that on anybody! I’m not a hero, I’m some dead teenager that didn’t save the school or crime. I everyone that once knew me thinks I’m dead and the person that took the shot got the satisfaction of putting me in ground. Is that the hero you’re praising me to be! HUH MIRIO!?”

Mirio just looked at me with wide eyes, he knew he messed up and this whole convince her to be a hero ploy was not going to work.

“I’m sorry- I, don’t know what to say... I never thought-”

“save it Mirio” I said through my angry tears “I need to be alone right now, excuse me.” I teleport out before he could reach out to stop me. He ran to the dorms to see if I was there and apologize properly.

“Um hello! Sorry for the intrusion, but did Palma-san teleport in?” asked Mirio at the entrance of the dorms to Midoriya and Todoroki.

“I didn’t see her before I came down here.” said Midoriya

“Me neither, I thought she was with you Mirio-kun” answered Todoroki “what happened?”

“I asked her a question and I guess it hit a nerve with her and she started to get upset and cry. Before I could apologize she said she needed to be alone and teleported off” explained Mirio “I feel so awful and I don’t know where else could she be!”

“Hmm, I think Iida-kun might know! Lets go ask him, come.” said Todoroki

The boys go up to the boys side and found Iida in the commons room.

“Iida-kun we need help!” said Midoriya in a panic “Palma-san ran off”

“Ran off? I thought she was with-” Iida started then stopped when he saw Mirio with a gulity expression on “with you- WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HER?! YOU MADE HER CRY DIDN’T YOU!?”

Mirio flinched “I did and I feel absolutely terrible! I didn’t know my question was going to get her upset and cry! Can you please help me find her?”

Iida was trying his hardest not to blow up in Mirio’s face “I have an idea where she might of ran off to, the intelligence dorms and probably in her friends’ dorm to vent” he said as he walked toward the stairs “come on! we have a small window before she goes on a mini adventure with those 2!” The boys follow him to the 4 story dorms thats right next to the hero dorms.

“Hey I’ve seen that car before in the school parking lot! I didn’t know their sensei had an American model car.” said Midoriya as he pointed at the tan colored Jeep that was parked on the west side of the dorms.

Iida panics and said “oh right? hehe imports are so expensive! Lets hurry!”

They go up to the 2nd floor and get greeted by Jin “WELL! if it isn’t a broccoli, robot, thermostat and naked man! Here to make baby girl cry some more?! Or did you come to surrender your asses to Mimi for a Russian beeting?!”

“Please! Mirio just wanted to-”

“SAVE IT ROBOT! I know what happened and I’m about to use my moves on yall if you take one. more. step.” Jin menaced as he struck a pose.

“This is ridiculous! I just want to see her real quick, excuse me” Mirio said as he scooted past Jin.

“MAYDAY MAYDAY! PALMA TAKE ESCAPE MEASURES!” Jin screamed into his earpiece.

The boys stood confused for a second then heard a car honk.

“Gotta go boys! Babygirl doesn’t wanna talk to yall” he said summoning a portal “bye bye!”

Iida’s eyes widen as he realizes whats going on “SHE WOULDN’T!” as he sped off with the other boys followed 

“she wouldn’t do what Iida-kun?!” asked Todoroki as they got to the front of the dorms. They catch her with Mimi and Jin in that tan Jeep, speeding off the property.

“That, Mirio you just-” he said turning to Mirio but gets cut off by Midoriya.

“SHE STOLE A CAR! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! SHE’S GOING TO GET HURT IIDA-KUN! I’M REPORTING THIS TO AIZAWA IMMEDIATELY.”

“There is no way she’s getting out of this one” Todoroki said shocked “she violated school rules and committed a felony!”

Cut to hours later when I returned to my dorm, Mirio went home and blew up my phone and everyone in the hero dorm knows what I did. I teleported in my room and got out of my emergency outing clothes that I keep in my car and into lounge wear. My plan was to walk out of my room and act like I didn’t just go to the arcade and messed with people at the town plaza with Mimi and Jin. I walk out and see everyone in the commons room; along with Aizawa, Midnight and All Might... oh n e p t u n e I am in danger of getting exposed.

“Oh Miss Palma! There you are, you gave your classmates quite a scare” said Aizawa “mind telling us the details of your latest heist?”

I sweat but feel bold “Oh hehehe NOPE!” I said as I tried to teleport but get swindled by Aizawa’s Erasure and I fall on my face.

“You’re not in trouble but your classmates need to know why what you did isn’t terms to get you in trouble.” coaxed Midnight as she helped me up.

Deep breath in “Ok yall so you heard about me speeding off in a Jeep that was parked near the intelligence dorms. Truth is, I didn’t steal the car nor did I borrow it, that Jeep belongs to me.” I say as I take out my car key “I was issued a Japan drivers license a month before school started and the Jeep was imported from my home in the America. The only person in the hero 1-A class that knew about this secret was Tenya because I trusted him with this secret among some others I don’t want to get into. I’m sorry for all the worry and distress I’ve caused over this, please forgive me for my carelessness.”

“Young lady I don’t know how they do it in America but these impulses need to stop! It’s not the hero way.” scolded All Might

“No All Might, she’s allowed to do all that, she’s intel and I won’t hear the end of it from Agent 99 if we provoke her!” Midnight said already feeling the stress of the backlash.

“You’re not my dad American Stereotype Man! I do what I want, I’m not stupid!” I sassed.

“This whole time you had a car and couldn’t give us rides anywhere?!” spoke up Sero “do you know how many Mcdonalds runs we could’ve had?!”

“We could’ve gone shopping at the nicer malls! Or went to the arcade after school!” Kaminari chimed in.

Everyone was abuzz with this new information and I had enough, I wasn’t having fun anymore. “SHUT UP! This is exactly why I didn’t tell anyone, yall would just use me for my car instead of treating me like a true friend. I’ve had it with today!” I yelled as I walked back to my dorm to cry out my frustration. I cried myself to sleep that night and woke up puffy from all the crying. I felt and looked like garbage and no amount of makeup could’ve helped it. I get a text while I waited for my coffee to finish brewing, it was from Mirio

[Good morning, I know you’re still upset but please let me right my wrongs. I want to talk and I promise I won’t bring up the past.]

I should respond or I’ll look like the bitch [ok, lets talk at lunch then]

[Great! see you then, have a good 1st half of school]

I get guilty that I did a whole spectacle in my wanting to be alone. I dread going to the hero wing for class, I wanted everyone to just not look at me, I was getting lost in my dread then I realized somebody was talking to me.

“Ita, what happened yesterday?” asked Iida softly

“Oh?! sorry I was getting lost in my thoughts. Mirio asked me why was I here and gave me false praise for my past.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Rather not, I don’t want to lash out on you too. I really lost control yesterday and everything else was a mess afterwards.”

While class was in session, the big 3 was getting filled in on what happened.

“I told you it was a bad idea! It’s a traumatic event Mirio!” scolded Amajiki.

“So what now? Do we just stop pursuing her now that we know the truth?” pondered Nejire “such a shame, she was a promising candidate for top hero.”

“Guys forget all that! I messed up BIG time with her and worst of all she doesn’t even want to be here” said Mirio as he flipped through his phone “I even looked up the school she went to and it’s true what she said, everyone believes she’s dead and she didn’t actually stop that gang leader. She’s not a hero back home, and she’s not at liberty to switch over to be one.”

The other two looked at each other and Amajiki asked “Are you going to break up with her?”

“I don’t want to but I can’t lie to myself that what I did was forgivable, I looked at her personal information and just assumed she was this hometown hero that’s studying abroad to help everyone back home” said Mirio solemnly “She’s a bright young lady that was taken away from her family and home to live her life in hiding here. I’ve never been so wrong in my life guys, it’s best if I break things off.”

“We’re with you on this Mirio!” said Nejire hugging Mirio.

“Then is today the day you’re going to-” started Amajiki.

“No, I’m going to wait until we get into our exams so I don’t put blame on them but on my seriousness to be a hero. She’ll understand and it’s less hurtful.” 

Lunch started and I was sweating with anxiety, I was down with breaking up but not with delving into the reasons I ended up here. It went better than I thought, he apologized and I apologized for the whole dramatics of the car thing. I was relieved that he didn’t want to break up because I wanted to practice his quirk some more, I was almost at mastery with it. Fast forward to stats and strats with Jin, an upperclassman works with us on classwork.

“Say, are you guys part of the top first years that are taking the practice exams?” asked the upperclassman.

“We are! I guess rumor of it is spreading among the program.” said Jin

“Congrats! Are you guys excited about the pro-take down? Because we all are!”

“Why? What’s so cool about it for the hype?” I questioned.

“Because it’s broadcasted for the school and agencies to watch! Plus the whole set up is made to defeat or detain all the 3rd years that are becoming pro heroes.”

“Wait does that also-”

“Yup, including the Big Three! They’re usually the reason why the test has a high fail rate. I personally haven’t seen anybody made it past the river section.”

I look at Jin and we exchange the same ‘bitch we have the upper hand’ look. Class ends and we rush over to Mimi to tell her the news.

“We do have the upper hand! Ita you have to say as long as possible with naked man and his friends.”

“Thats the plan but we need a special formation for at least detaining the other 2 and somehow stunning naked man-” I start and get interrupted with a text, it’s Mirio.

[Hey is it ok if today we don’t walk home together? I have to study with Amajiki and Nejire]

[It’s alright, work hard! see you tomorrow!]

I teleport to the dorms and I try not to bring attention to myself. I was doing my homework in my room and I get a bunch of knocks on my door

“who is it?”

“it’s the boys”

Why tho? “ok come in”

It was all the boys in 1-A pile in my room. I get a weird feeling in my stomach that they want something from me.

“We know another one of your dirty little secrets.” said Mineta

I start sweating because it could be literally anything “Oh yeah? what did you discover?”

“You’re familiar with the game League of Legends? Aren’t you Tsaxyphone420?!” confronted Kaminari.

Oh what a relief! It’s a non serious secret. “Oh you caught me! Yes I am Tsaxyphone420.”

The boys gasped “I can’t believe it! How are you playing the game without a console or TV?” asked Sero.

I walk over to my closet and show them a 2 by 3ft flat screen and a game console with my pink controller and matching headset. “My buddy Jin fixed the tv and console that we found at a thrift store while trying to find parts for our project. I’ve had my account for years before I came here and I’d just play when I get invited to the 3rd year kickbacks.”

The boys were floored and envious of my well kept secrets but I was curious “How did you guys know it was me?”

“Alot of the moves and strategies the character does mimics your pattern of strategy minus the wrestling moves” said Midoriya holding his notebook “I noticed when I was watching Kaminari and Mineta try to raid your fortress a month ago.”

“At the same time you were in your allegedly in your room doing your online homework” Iida said fixing his glasses “your giggling and murmuring was suspicious and we connected the dots.”

“And we’re here to make a wager Palma-san! Your clan v our clan! If we win, you have to cook us dinner for a month” proclaimed Sato “dessert included!”

“Ok and if I win, yall have to cook breakfast for the girls and I for a month.”

“DEAL! WE WON’T LOSE!” said Mineta, Sero, Sato, Kaminari and Tokoyami in unison “SUMMON THINE CLAN FOR WAR!”

“Palma to Matsui, do you copy?”

“Matsui here, what’s the situation?”

“We’ve been challenged, order to summon the clan!”

“-gasp- I am contacting the others immediately!”

“Roger that” 

We played on the commons room TV and everyone came down to see. Victory to my clan and the uproar from the boys was so rewarding.

“AHHHH! Mineta you fuckin cost us the game!” yelled Sato.

“nuh! Denki when full dumb mode when he started attacking us instead!”

“We lost, now we must uphold our end of the deal” Tokoyami said trying to hide his rage.

“Good job clan! You just earned me breakfast for a whole month.”

“Our pleasure Palma! See you later!”

“no fair! you have all the talent!” said Kaminari “seriously what can’t you do?!”

“I keep telling yall it’s math! Something about numbers makes my brain shut off.”

“Didn’t you test out of 1st year math?” Iida slid in with the facts.

“Yea, BARELY! I was one point away from having to take it anyways! But also if I didn’t test out, I wouldn’t be in your class.” I said as I took my headset off “would anyone else be as fun as me?!”

Fast forward to Saturday, Mimi and Jin summoned me for a training session. We work on formations in the shared field and it caught the attention of the Baku-squad.

“Hey! mind if we have a go at you three?” said Kirishima “those formations are looking a bit easy to evade.”

“Ok, the goal is to detain, get in formation heroes!” said Jin “Mr. Muffins start timer.”

We start and as expected, they’re trying to take down Mimi when the real threat is Jin. We them in the center of our formation and Jin gives the signal to get out of the center to deploy endless loop portals (point A portal is directly under portal B so the object falls indefinitely). The Baku-squad gets in the loop and we shoot our net guns to detain them and get them out of the endless falling.

“TIME! How long was that Mr Muffins?” asked Jin.

“that was 2 minutes and 45 seconds.”

“Fuck! we didn’t shave off our goal” I said as I untangled Mina out of the net “yall want another go to see if we can shave another 15 seconds off to our goal time?”

“What the hell was that?!” growled Bakugo “That was so quick I didn’t even realize I got captured!”

“I think I’m gonna be sick” groaned Sero.

“So is that a no?” asked Mimi.

“You three are so potent, its a little scary how silent and quick you captured us” said Kirishima trying to gnaw himself out of the net.

“You should see us when we have weapon combat!” I said starting to untangle Kirishima “Mimi shot a rubber bullet into somebody’s asshole during the licensing, poor dude regretted teasing us with his exposed ass out. And Jin! oof you better not get too close or he’ll cut you so quick with his squat and stab combo!”

“But that’s not as impressive as your boomerang timer gun combo! I shat myself when I saw the flying gun at the licensing, that poor West side school didn’t see it coming and they all failed.” said Jin untying Bakugo.

They saw us like we were psychopaths and didn’t want to train with us anymore. I go about the rest of my day and Mirio asks me to an impromptu date. We walk to downtown and spend quality time together but I could tell he did it to make himself not feel guilty about the next few days of slowly detaching himself to break up with me. I this isn’t my first rodeo, I know the beginning of the end when I see it. I ask the difficult questions

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Yea, what is it?” he said as he stopped his sip.

“I know you’re older and its a different culture here, but what number am I on your list?”

“On my list of what?”

“List of people you’ve dated, what number am I?”

“I don’t see you as a number! But you are my second.”

“...really?”

“yes....wait, what number am I?”

“Fourth, and if you’re counting random kissing encounters, tenth.”

Mirio spits out his drink “WHAT?! You’ve kissed random dudes?”

“Band parties and Intel parties are fucking wild dude, I don’t get around, I’m picky about the boys I want to involved myself with.”

“You were my first kiss and longest relationship, I guess I wasn’t the experienced one in this one huh?” he said nervously.

“You didn’t kiss your first one?”

“no... I was like 11 when we ‘dated’ and broke up a week later because I accidentally got naked while we were holding hands.”

“Thats both hysterical and cute at once!” I said laughing.

Mirio starts to run his hand on my side, I know where this is going “Well I haven’t had much practice, I’m always training and studying.”

“Well if it’s practice you want” I said before looking around and whispered in his ear “you can test my skills in the back of my Jeep.”

He spits out his drink again and vigorously nods his head. I saw his eyes, they screamed ‘yes please holy shit thats hot’. We briskly walked to the street corner and I teleported us to my car. We didn’t waste time, the moment I opened the back he tossed me in and dove right in. While we didn’t have sex or anything lewd, things still got really hot and heavy. When we had enough, I drove him home and he was still dazed from our little session. I went back to the dorms thinking I was so sly that I added a couple more days to my relationship. I teleport in and went to drink some water because a bitch thirsty. I was just standing in the kitchen chugging water and Bakugo flips the light on and sees how disheveled I was.

“Nice! Me too” he said as he took off his shirt and I saw his love marks and scratch marks.

“Bitch you don’t even know the full story!” I said as I took off my shirt and my marks ran down my chest and sides plus deeper scratch marks on my back. We shared details and he kinda slipped that it was Kirishima. “It’s cool fam, secrets safe with me.”

“thanks, gotta go give him some water before he whines.” he said running off with a bottle of water in hand.

I walk to my room with my shirt off and Tokoyami walks out and just stares longingly.

“I miss that, Ita. How much longer do I have to wait to have another session with you?”

“I don’t know, from the way things went in my car. I just added at least another week, be patient~”

I wake up in the morning feeling so smug with myself that I didn’t even try to hide my love marks. There was talk in the bathroom after I left.

“Yo! Mirio is really claiming her” whispered Sero to Kaminari “not gonna lie bro, I hope they stay together.”

“ugh right! Seeing them makes me want to fall in love too” whispered Midoriya “wonder if Iida-kun has moved on from her?”

The whispers still made it through the roar of the shower head Iida was under. He’s still hurt and refuses to move on because he swears she’s THE one. Meanwhile, the big three are at Amajiki’s house, studying but it was really just to check in with Mirio.

“Helloooo! Earth to Mirio!” Nejire waved a hand in front of a still dazed Mirio.

“Mirio did you do it?” asked Amajiki.

“No...we didn’t have any protection, it wouldn’t be fair~” Mirio said spacing out.

Nejire and Amajiki looked at each other “Mirio...he meant did you break up with her.”

Mirio snapped out of it “Oh...OH! uhhh no...” he put his head in his hands “I was on track to the break up part but she got me with the ‘wanna test me in the back of my Jeep’ and now I want to make-out while the sun sets.”

“It’s like she’s luring you in for something.” said Amajiki

“Yeah, commitment! Mirio you can’t just stay with her because she lets you suck face in her car, kiss her goodbye before it goes too far.”

“That’s my problem Nejire! I think I love her~!” He said slamming his head down on the table “I don’t even want to change her to be a hero, I want to be domestic and have kids with her! Maybe some dogs and with flower bushes everywhere and....” Mirio was going off in his tangent while the other two came up with a plan. The new plan was to give Palma-san a break up note before going to an off-campus training. That will give time for Mirio to forget about her and for Palma to move on. 

-One week later: Wednesday, in the hallway of the hero wing-

“Ok Mirio, you’ve dodged this moment for too long!” said Nejire “Here’s the note, just give it to her and then you don’t have to talk to her for 3 days about it.”

“You have to do it buddy” said Amajiki patting Mirio on the back “This wasn’t going to last and you know it.”

“I know” Mirio said sadly, rubbing his thumb over the small square with her full name on it “You guys are the best friends anybody could ask for!” He exclaimed as he hugged them. The other two scatter when they hear my foot steps and coffee slurping.

“Hey love! funny running into you here!”

“Hahaha I have class here silly! I thought you left already for the training?”

“We leave during lunch so I wanted to give you this!” he said trying not to sound sad as he handed the note “Just a little bit of my ramblings that I thought would be romantic for you to have while I’m gone!”

“Oh how sweet, you’re making it sound like you’re going to war!” I said as I looked at the name on the note, Itati Palma? Full names are for people in trouble, I see what this is “I’ll still miss you though, stay safe sweetheart” I said trying not to vomit at my fake sentiment.

Mirio was having a dilema, he wanted to leave it at that but he really wanted to kiss her. “Come close love, let me walk you to class” he said as he put his arm around me. When we got to the class, I turned around to say bye and he kissed me hard and everyone in class saw. “One for the road! See you later love~”

“Bye~ sweetheart~” I say as he walked down the hall. I turn to walk to my desk and everyone was in shock at what they just witnessed. “Hahaha hello everyone! I-”

“AH PALMA-SAN THAT WAS SO ROMANTIC!” squealed the girls and Aoyama.

Midoriya was glancing over to Iida, he had his head in his crossed arms, looking defeated.

“Iida-kun?” Midoriya asked gently

“she’s so sweet and lovely, of course Mirio expresses his affection so boldly to her” he said muffled into his arms “they deserve each other.” 

Class starts and goes as usual, then lunch time comes.

“Where are you going to eat Palma-san now that Mirio is away?” asked Momo.

“Oh uhhhh with my intel friends and Tenya of course!” I said trying not to sound like I have an ulterior motive.

Iida perks up “Huh? We are?” then he reads my face and I give the ‘i have a secret to share’ face “Oh right! we planned this on Monday! let’s go meet up with those 2!” he said as we briskly walked down the hall, out of earshot.

‘Palma to Matsui and Oleshin, do you copy?’

‘Matsui here/Oleshin here’

‘We are in the midst of the Doomsday event fellas’

‘-gasp-/-gasp-’

‘I am heading to the rendevou point with one Robot’

‘Roger that/ Roger that’

“Robot? is that my code name?!”

“Yea, its better than the other names we’ve been calling you”

“Ok but what is going on Ita?!”

“Mirio gave me a note and I know exactly what it is but I want to fill you in on why Jin and Mimi are involved in this too.”

 We get to the intelligence wing and I check if we got anyone following us. Coast is clear, I pull Iida into the workshops.

“Why is it so dark? and smells like...omelette?”

“HEY! I MADE THIS BITCHES FRESH!” Jin yelled offendedly in the dark.

I flip on the light “oof yall, it’s finally happened” I said as I take the note out of my pocket for the others to look at.

“First full name? Oh honey its like they think it’s slick but you don’t even need to open it to know!” said Mimi with sass.

“What is going on? it’s just a note for Ita, from Mirio I presume.” said Iida oblivious to what is actually going on.

I explained everything and Iida’s jaw dropped. “YOU INVOLVED YOURSELF WITH THE NUMBER 1 OF THE SCHOOL JUST TO USE HIM AS A STEPPING STOOL?!”

“To be fair, I wanted to out of affection but he wanted to CONVERT ME TENYA!”

“So now that they’re broken up” said Jin with a mouthful of omelette “we have the upper hand in our practice exam but the one person we need a bit more time to prefect the plan is the pointy eared boi.”

“The plan now is to get her close to him, disguise it as ‘Mirio blocked my number and won’t talk to me’ and have her copy the quirk to prefect the transformations we need.” said Mimi.

“If he wants to get it with me, I wouldn’t mind but it’s going to get super awkward trying to explain that I knew the whole time what they wanted with me.”

“I’m at a loss for words” said Iida slinking into his chair “all those dates and affection before class today, none of it matters? You don’t feel bad about it?”

“Both sides had alterior motives, thats not love Tenya! Love is when you look at someone and you don’t want to change a single thing about them nor care who doesn’t want them to be together. I’ll get the most satisfactory out of looking at his face when I defeat him with his own quirk, he really thought he had me figured out.” 

“huh, the note was written by 3 different people” Mimi said examining the note “and from the choice of words, it looks like Mirio didn’t want to break up.”

I read over the note “You’re right! This was group decision break up, just like how they targeted me.”

I don’t know how to go about this complication but the pro-take down practice test is in 2 weeks. Time to cause some drama between the boys.

-End Chapter 9-

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