#funny that i resigned myself to drudgery forever when i refuse to even look at the semi-boring stuff i have to do Today
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booing and hissing at the concept of not immediately being good/better at stuff when i want them to be fixed Right Now Immediately
#auden yammers#vent#yes yes things are getting better at work but they’re not getting better fast enough for people not to notice them being bad#me internally: my productivity is improving :)#my boss: hey i noticed your productivity is rlly bad#me: :(( i realize.#yes yes mitigate the shitty things ur brain is doing to other ppl but also I’m Not Fixing It Fast Enough!!! wails#I Used To Be Worse is NOT a good thing to say#surprise! i thought i was rlly good at deadlines but it turns out. i’m only good at deadlines when i would have finished them#BEFORE the deadline anyway. actual deadlines? fucked.#surprise! meds aren’t going to fix my habit of dragging my feet on shit i don’t like to do#i have to Do That Myself. which will take real time and real effort and it’s going to be shitty but it has to work#funny that i resigned myself to drudgery forever when i refuse to even look at the semi-boring stuff i have to do Today
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