#funeral roasts are coming back guys they told me

[fishtrift]

i ain't never seen two alive best friends.. it's always one of em gotta be dead

[neferaskingdom]

♡ Closetgate: The Max-tastrophe | MV1

Pairing: Max Verstappen x Leclerc!Reader [Face Claim: None]

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Summary: Max finds himself in a very tight situation—literally. Lando is summoned for an emergency extraction, Charles serenades about honor, Y/N fights for her life trying to prove that nothing happened and the boys plan Max's funeral, but hey at least they finally kissed?

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Part 4 of my wheel-to-wheel but still in denial series: Masterlist

Y/N never expected this to happen. One moment, she was causing chaos on Instagram with that elevator pic—harmless fun, right? But Max’s confession came out of nowhere, and now she was standing in her apartment, heart pounding.

She barely had time to process the fact that she’d just invited Max over, let alone get ready. Y/N looked down at her oversized, mismatched pajama set, which sported a giant, ridiculous “I Paused My Game to Be Here” T-shirt. Definitely not the “I’ve just confessed to liking my childhood rival” look she was going for.

She barely had time to question her life choices before there was a knock at the door. When she opened it, Max stood there, leaning against the doorframe like he wasn’t about to change everything. He gave her that classic smirk, but something felt different tonight—softer, more uncertain.

“Did you run here or teleport?” she asked, unable to hide her surprise.

“I might have broken a few traffic laws,” he joked, walking in like he hadn’t just sprinted across town. He glanced around her apartment, then at her, still wearing her gaming shirt. "Nice shirt, by the way," he smirked.

She rolled her eyes. “Shut up, Verstappen. I didn’t expect you to break the sound barrier to get here.” Max chuckled, plopping down on her couch like he belonged there. "You texted, I ran. It's the natural order of things."

"You actually came," she blurted, mostly because she didn’t know what else to say. The second the words left her mouth, she realized how ridiculous they sounded. "You told me to," Max shot back, stepping inside without missing a beat. "What, did you think I’d say no?"

"I don’t know! Maybe?" she stammered, closing the door behind him. "This whole thing is weird!" 

"Weird how?" Max turned to face her, looking genuinely confused. "Because I confessed or because you didn’t see it coming?"

Y/N groaned, throwing her hands up. "Both! Max, we’ve spent most of our lives arguing over who’s funnier and which one of us sucks more. And now you’re telling me you like me? You don’t just drop that bomb and act like everything’s normal!"

Max shrugged, trying to act casual, but there was something in his eyes that made Y/N’s stomach flip. "I’m not saying it’s normal. I’m saying it’s real. We joke around because that’s us. But I like you, Y/N. I’ve liked you for years. I just didn’t want to mess up what we had."

Y/N’s mind was racing. She couldn’t reconcile the Max in front of her with the one who used to relentlessly call her out on social media. “So, what? You’ve been secretly into me while roasting me all these years? And I’m just supposed to be like, ‘Yeah, cool, let’s date now?’”

Max smiled, but it wasn’t his usual cocky grin. It was softer, more vulnerable. "I get it. It sounds insane. But I’m serious. When I saw that post, Y/N… I thought you had someone else. And it hit me harder than I expected. I realized I didn’t want to just be the guy you bicker with online. I wanted more than that."

She stared at him, still processing. "So, you’re telling me this now because of one random photo?"

"It wasn’t just the photo," Max said, stepping closer. "It was the idea that I’d waited too long. That I might have missed my shot."

Her heart skipped a beat. This was getting real, fast. Y/N crossed her arms, more to protect herself from the flood of emotions than anything else. "Max… I don’t know what to say."

Max chuckled lightly, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck—a nervous habit she’d noticed over the years. "You don’t have to say anything. I just couldn’t keep pretending anymore."

She opened her mouth, then closed it again. There was something so raw and honest about him right now, and it was messing with her. This was Max—her partner in social media wars, her favorite person to annoy. And now, he was standing in her living room, confessing feelings that she didn’t know how to handle.

Finally, she let out a breathy laugh. "You’re really bad at timing, you know that? I was just getting used to us hating each other."

Max’s smile widened. "We never hated each other, Y/N."

"Sure felt like it sometimes," she muttered, though there was no bite behind her words. She was too busy trying to sort through the tangled mess of emotions in her head.

"Come on," he teased softly. "You know we’ve always had a thing."

"A thing?" Y/N raised an eyebrow. "Oh, so insulting each other in public and trolling each other on Instagram was just our way of flirting?"

Max stepped closer, and this time, there was no teasing in his voice. "For me, yeah. That’s always been part of it. But it’s more than that."

Max says with a shrug. “I like you because you're chaotic and you keep me on my toes. Plus, I figured all the teasing was basically foreplay.”

Her jaw dropped. “Excuse me?!” She grabbed a throw pillow and launched it at him. “That is not how that works!”

Max laughed, catching the pillow and tossing it aside. “Hey, if it’s not, it should be! We’ve been bantering for years—it’s basically flirting with extra steps.”

She facepalmed, letting out a frustrated groan. “This is so not how I expected this conversation to go. You’re taking all of this way too casually!”

Y/N’s heart was beating so loud she was sure he could hear it. "Max, this is a lot. I didn’t… I didn’t expect this."

"I know." His voice was soft now, almost unsure. "But I had to tell you. I’ve been holding it in for so long, and I thought—"

"That you’d shoot your shot now?" she cut in, trying to lighten the mood even though her head was spinning.

He grinned, finally relaxing a bit. "Exactly. You can’t blame me for that, right?"

She bit her lip, trying to hide a smile. "I guess not. But… Max, I—"

He raised a hand, stopping her. "You don’t have to say anything right now. I just wanted to be honest. For once."

Y/N sighed, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on her. "But here’s the thing… I kinda, sorta like you too." The words slipped out before she could stop them, and she immediately wanted to crawl into a hole.

Max blinked, then his smile widened into something she’d never seen before—completely genuine and warm. "Kinda, sorta, huh?"

She rolled her eyes, though her heart was flipping. "Don’t make this weird."

"Too late," Max said, stepping even closer, his voice playful but soft. "You’ve already made it weird."

Y/N groaned. "You’re impossible."

"And you like me anyway," Max shot back with a grin, his face just inches from hers now.

Y/N sighed, her defenses finally crumbling as she looked up at him. "Yeah, I guess I do."

Y/N sat down beside him, feeling the weight of the situation settle in. She looked at him—his stupid grin, his messy hair, his absolute lack of any chill—and suddenly it all clicked. This wasn’t some weird joke or prank. Max actually meant every word.

"Okay," she said slowly, still processing. "But I reserve the right to make fun of you for the rest of our lives."

Max grinned, scooting closer. “Deal. But you should know, I’m not backing down. Now that I’ve made my move, I’m all in.”

“God, you’re so dramatic,” Y/N muttered, but she couldn’t stop herself from smiling as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“Well, you kinda like me that way,” he teased.

“Yeah, yeah,” she rolled her eyes. But deep down, she knew he was right.

Before she could say anything else, Max leaned down, his lips brushing hers in the softest, most unexpected kiss. It wasn’t the kind of kiss that swept her off her feet or made fireworks explode, but it was perfect. It was exactly what she didn’t know she needed.

When he pulled back, he was still smiling, his hand lingering on her cheek. "Told you we’ve always had a thing."

Y/N was too flustered to argue, her mind still reeling from everything that had just happened. "Okay," she mumbled, her voice barely above a whisper. "But don’t think this changes anything. I’m still gonna kick your ass at karting ."

Max chuckled, pulling her into his arms. "I wouldn’t expect anything less."

They kissed again, and this time it was longer, more intense. Y/N felt herself melting into Max’s arms, his hands gently resting on her waist as he pulled her closer. She could feel the warmth of him, the steady beat of his heart under her fingertips as her hands slid up to his chest. His lips were soft but insistent, and there was a tenderness in the way he kissed her, as if he’d been waiting for this moment far longer than she had imagined.

Her hands slipped up to the back of his neck, pulling him closer, and Max responded instantly, deepening the kiss in a way that made her head spin. For a few blissful seconds, all the banter, the teasing, and the chaos of their lives disappeared, leaving only the two of them and the unspoken tension that had always been there, simmering beneath the surface.

When they finally pulled apart, slightly breathless, Y/N looked up at him, trying to steady her pounding heart. Max's lips were still curved into a small, satisfied smile, and his thumb absentmindedly traced the side of her hip.

“You know,” she started, trying to regain her composure, “if you’re going to stay, I could, uh, make some space on the couch.”

Max raised an eyebrow, his smirk returning in full force. “You want me to spend the night?”

Her face heated instantly, but she refused to let him see her squirm. “Don’t get too excited, Verstappen.” She poked him in the chest, narrowing her eyes playfully. “No funny business. It’s gonna take a hell of a lot more than a last-minute confession for me to invite you to my bed.”

Max chuckled, his laugh low and sending a ripple of warmth down her spine. He leaned in, his voice dropping to that maddening, teasing tone she was starting to realize she might actually like. “Oh, I wasn’t planning on funny business, Y/N.” His lips brushed her ear, making her shiver slightly. “I’m gonna wine and dine you, take my time. By the time I’m done, you’ll be begging me to come to bed.”

Y/N’s eyes widened at his words, and she smacked his arm, trying to play it cool, though her heart was practically doing somersaults. “Begging?” she repeated, a disbelieving laugh escaping her. “You’ve officially lost your mind.”

Max, completely unbothered, grinned like the cat who caught the canary. “Keep telling yourself that.”

“God, I’m going to regret this,” Y/N muttered, though a smile tugged at her lips.

“Only if I don’t get the chance to prove you wrong,” Max shot back smoothly, his arm casually wrapping around her waist as if they’d done this a hundred times before.

Y/N rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t deny the warmth spreading through her. “Fine. You get the couch. And maybe—maybe—we’ll see about that whole wining and dining thing later.”

Max leaned back, stretching out on the couch with that same cocky grin. “Challenge accepted.”

Text Message between Y/N and Lando:

y/n: LANDO I’M GONNA DIE. y/n: LIKE ACTUAL DEATH. COME TO MY APARTMENT NOW.

lando: huh??? lando: it’s 8am, woman chill lando: also why is this my problem

y/n: CHARLES IS HERE y/n: HE SHOWED UP AT 7AM AND HASN’T SHUT UP FOR AN HOUR y/n: He’s on a WHOLE monologue about "family honor" y/n: I AM GOING TO JUMP OUT THE WINDOW IF YOU DON’T HELP ME

lando: and again lando: why… is this my problem? 💀

y/n: BECAUSE MAX IS HIDING IN MY CLOSET, LANDO y/n: IF CHARLES FINDS HIM HERE, I’M GONNA NEED TO WRITE A EULOGY y/n: HELP

lando: … lando: hold up HOLD UP MAX IS WHERE NOW???

y/n: CLOSET. MAX IS IN THE CLOSET. y/n: LIKE. LITERALLY HIDING IN MY CLOSET RIGHT NOW BECAUSE CHARLES IS RANTING ABOUT THE ELEVATOR PICTURE

y/n: AND IF CHARLES FINDS HIM HERE HE’LL LITERALLY COMMIT MURDER!!!

y/n: HURRY UP AND GET HERE I NEED A DISTRACTION y/n: HE’S GOING TO KILL US BOTH AND THEN DRAG OUR BODIES THROUGH THE STREETS OF MONACO

lando: LMFAOOO NOT MAX HIDING IN THE CLOSET LIKE HE’S IN A TEEN ROMCOM 💀 lando:  YOU AND MAX?? 

lando: Wait so like. Did you two… y’know? 👀

y/n: NO NO NO IT’S NOT LIKE THAT, I SWEAR. y/n: WE DID NOT HOOK UP. NOTHING HAPPENED. y/n: but if charles finds him he’s not gonna believe that, you KNOW how dramatic he is

lando: Then why’s he in your closet, huh?

lando: You’re telling me you two were just doing nothing at 7am, and now he’s hiding from your overprotective brother??

lando: This is sus af 💀

y/n: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOTHING HAPPENED. y/n: He came over to… uh… talk? y/n: BUT THAT’S NOT THE POINT!! HURRY THE HELL UP BEFORE CHARLES GOES FULL "BIG BROTHER PROTECTOR MODE" AND THINKS THE WORST

lando: Soooo Max just "talks" now? Sure, sure. Just casually talking at 7am at your apartment. lando: I bet he was gonna give you a "lecture" of his own, wasn’t he? 😉

y/n: I’M GOING TO BLOCK YOU IF YOU DON’T STOP.

y/n: HURRY UP, LANDO.

lando: yeah your brother’s gonna yeet Max into the Mediterranean Sea 💀 lando: this is absolutely gold lando: I’m grabbing popcorn, one sec

y/n: STOP JOKING I’M SERIOUS LANDO y/n: CHARLES IS GOING ON ABOUT “RESPECT” AND “TRADITION” LIKE WE’RE IN A DAMN PERIOD DRAMA y/n: HURRY UP AND GET HIM OUT OF HERE. CHA IS LITERALLY OUT HERE RAMBLING ABOUT "RESPECTING FAMILY HONOR."

lando: Fiiiine, I’m getting out of bed. lando: But seriously, Max? Who would have guessed? That’s hilarious. You could’ve picked a better hiding spot tho 💀

y/n: YOU THINK I HAD TIME TO COORDINATE A BETTER PLAN WHEN CHARLES SHOWED UP OUT OF NOWHERE???

lando: You could’ve gone with like… under the bed? Maybe pretend he’s a delivery guy? 😂 lando: Closet’s too obvious, mate. Rookie mistake.

y/n: OKAY, SPYMASTER LANDO, HOW ABOUT YOU FOCUS ON GETTING HERE AND NOT ON MY HIDING STRATEGIES?

lando: wait sooooo lando: MAX REALLY STAYED OVER?? 👀 lando: I’M TELLING YOU, I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING BETWEEN YOU TWO. YOU DON’T HIDE IN CLOSETS FOR JUST ANYONE, SIS

y/n: WE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING LANDO. I SWEAR TO GOD. y/n: BUT IF YOU DON’T GET HERE, CHARLES IS GONNA ASSUME THE WORST AND START DIGGING A GRAVE

lando: fine fine I’m coming 💀 lando: this is too good tho, I’m never letting you live this down lando: if Charles finds Max it’s gonna be like “sooo, Max, wanna explain why you’re hiding in my sister’s closet like a serial killer?”

y/n: LANDO. I WILL BLOCK YOU. y/n: JUST GET HERE NOW, BEFORE I HAVE TO FAKE MY OWN DEATH TO ESCAPE THIS SITUATION

lando: can’t wait to see you try to explain why Max is suddenly living in your closet 😭😭 lando: tell Charles Max is helping you with a home renovation or some shit 💀 lando: I’ll be there soon to save your ass

y/n: IF YOU DON’T HURRY, IT’LL BE MY FUNERAL YOU’RE COMING TO. y/n: I’M NOT KIDDING, LANDO. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

lando: Yeah yeah I’m on it.

lando: But if Max survives this, I wanna be best man at the wedding 🥂

lando created a group

lando added Y/N, max, daniel, george and alex to the group

lando has changed the name of the group to “Drive to Survive: Closet Edition”

lando: EMERGENCY GROUP CHAT. STOP EVERYTHING. 🚨

george: Bro, it’s like 9AM. What now??

alex: Bro, what is it this time?? Did you lose your keys again? 💀

daniel:  Lando, I swear to God, if this is about you locking yourself out of your car again, I’m leaving the group chat.

lando: NO. BIGGER. MUCH BIGGER. lando: I had to save Max’s life this morning. 😳

max: lando, if you even—

lando: MAX WAS HIDING IN Y/N’S CLOSET THIS MORNING.

y/n: LANDO, I SWEAR TO GOD—

george: HOLD ON. Max was hiding in what now?? george: MAX. HIDING. IN Y/N’S CLOSET?! 💀

alex: WAIT WAIT WAIT. MAX?! IN HER CLOSET?? alex: Sounds like an F1 driver version of "Narnia." 🦁 alex: But instead of a lion, you found… Max?

daniel: Wait, hold on. HOLD UP.

daniel: Max was hiding? In Y/N’s closet?

daniel: Were you two… busy? 👀

daniel: This is starting to sound like the setup to a very different kind of movie, if you know what I mean… 

lando: RIGHT?! Closet boy Max out here sneaking around at 7AM.

y/n: NOTHING HAPPENED. y/n: CHARLES SHOWED UP OUT OF NOWHERE AND MAX HAD TO HIDE OR HE’D BE DEAD.

lando: She’s underselling it. Charles was out here talking about "honor" like we were back in medieval times.

max: she’s not wrong, charles had murder in his eyes talking about Y/N’s hypothetical boyfriend

george: So, you’re telling me Max was hiding in Y/N’s closet because big bro Charles was about to lose his mind? george: LMAO Max, mate, you were this close to becoming roadkill at the next race.

george: This is gold. Max, you hiding like a teenage boy sneaking out of a girl’s room?! How much were you sweating?

max: look, it was either the closet or death by leclerc

alex: Soooo... you were hiding because…? 👀

alex: If Charles finds out, he’s definitely running Max off the track next race. alex: Or worse, he’ll crash right into him. 💀

daniel: Run him off the track? Charles would straight-up crash into Max next race, no questions asked. 💀

george: Mate, can you imagine? Lap 20: "Verstappen crashes after mysterious contact with Leclerc." 🤔

george: "Sources say Charles Leclerc was last seen revving his engine and screaming about his sister’s honor."

daniel: Bro, I can already see the headlines: "Verstappen DNF—Cause: Leclerc Rage." daniel: Max would be like, "I’m innocent!" while Charles just revs the engine like, "Try me bitch."

lando: Charles would be all smiles in the press conference like, "It was an unfortunate incident…" lando: Meanwhile, Max’s car would still be smoldering in the background.

max: ngl, he’d probably reverse just to make sure it’s done right 😬

alex: "Accident," sure, Charles. I’m sure brake checking Max into the wall was totally accidental.

daniel: Sooo… why were you hiding, Max? 👀 daniel: Closet redecoration? Or were you two getting cozy? 😏

lando: Oh, come on, there’s no hiding in closets unless something was happening. Let’s be real here. 👀

max: look, i was just… you know… max: avoiding death by overprotective brothers. that’s all.

george: Sure, Max. Just avoiding "death"… by hiding in her closet. Sounds innocent. Totally.

alex: Did you fold her clothes while you were in there, or just admire the view? 😂

daniel: Oh, we’re calling it "admiring the view" now, huh?

max: you guys have dirty minds, jesus

lando: Bro, you were literally in her closet. This is peak suspicious behavior.

y/n: NOTHING HAPPENED. y/n: STOP MAKING THIS WEIRD. 🙃

lando: Y/N, babe, you don’t just shove someone in your closet for no reason. There’s something here.

daniel: Yeah, like… what were you two really doing before Charles showed up? 👀 daniel: C’mon, no one hides someone unless they’re in the middle of… something.

y/n: I swear to god, if one more person suggests anything—

max: maybe i was just there to give her fashion advice 🤷‍♂️

george: OH, so that’s what they’re calling it now? "Fashion advice." Sounds steamy.

daniel: So what’d you suggest, Max? "Less clothes"? 😏

y/n: I’M LITERALLY GOING TO MUTE THIS CHAT. NOTHING HAPPENED.

lando: Uh-huh. Sure. lando: You don’t just casually invite Max over to give you "advice" in the early hours of the morning unless something’s going on. Just saying. 😉

daniel: I mean, I’d hide Max too if he showed up like that… 👀

alex: "Like that"? Sounds like Max was already halfway to being undressed. 💀

y/n: YOU GUYS ARE THE WORST.

max: you get used to it after a while

lando: Okay, okay, jokes aside… are you two, like, officially a thing now?

max: yeah, y/n and i… we’re seeing where this goes. officially.

george: OMG, IT'S HAPPENING. MAX AND Y/N ARE OFFICIALLY A THING. 🎉

lando: SOUND THE ALARMS, EVERYONE. lando: We’ve got ourselves a new grid couple. 👀

daniel: Ahhh, the "closet inchident" seals the deal. Love it. You Leclerc’s sure do love your Inchidents

alex: Soooo… have you told Charles yet? Or do we get to keep this secret and watch the chaos unfold?

y/n: ABSOLUTELY NOT. NONE OF YOU SAY A WORD. y/n: Do you WANT Max to end up in a wall at Monza?!

george: Max already looks like he’s preparing his will. 😂

max: pretty sure charles will crash into me on lap 1 if he finds out too early

daniel: I mean, Charles is gonna "accidentally" forget how to brake if he finds out Max’s been sneaking around his sister. 💀

lando: Yeah, next race? You’re gonna see Charles giving Max the death stare before they even get to Turn 1.

max: I’ll be lucky if I don’t get run off the track before lap 10

alex: Charles be like, "Oh sorry, did I cut across your line? Total accident, mate."

george: Imagine Arthur joining in, double-teaming Max on the straights. 💀

alex: "Sorry mate, but family’s family."

daniel: Max, if Charles finds out you were in her closet, he’s coming for you both on and off the track. No question.

lando: I can see it now—Max and Y/N in the paddock: "Charles, listen, it’s not what it looks like!" Meanwhile, Charles is just revving the engine, ready to take you out. 😂

max: and here i thought the danger was over when i left her apartment

alex: Bro, the danger just began. Charles is about to add "track rage" to his skillset.

daniel: "Oh, Max? Never heard of him. My car just had a mind of its own today." daniel: RIP Verstappen 1997-2024 💀

lando: You’ll go down as a legend, Max. "The man who was brave enough to date a Leclerc and live to tell the tale."

max: that’s if i make it past monza

y/n: YOU’RE ALL DRAMATIC.

george: Dramatic? Us? No way. george: I’m just saying, you better have a solid excuse ready when Charles finds out.

y/n: We’ll tell him eventually. Just… not now. y/n: And until then, if any of you open your big mouths, Max’s blood is on your hands.

daniel: So, what’s the plan? Keep hiding Max in your closet until you tell Charles? 💀

y/n: technically, yes.

y/n: But until then, NONE OF YOU SAY A WORD. LET ME HANDLE THIS.

lando: I mean… if I accidentally let it slip, is that on me or on the fact that Max was literally hiding in a CLOSET? 🤔

max: thanks lando, really appreciate it

daniel: Don’t worry, Max, we’ll make sure your funeral’s nice. Real classy. 💐

alex: I’ll bring flowers. Something dramatic, like roses. 🌹

george has changed the name of the group to “Max's Funeral Planning Committee"

george: Should we do slow-mo highlights of Max’s best overtakes at his funeral? Maybe some sad violin music?

lando: I’m picturing Max’s ghost standing next to Charles, watching the replays like, "Really? This is how I go out?" 💀

y/n: YOU’RE ALL INSANE. STOP JOKING ABOUT THIS.

george: We’ll make sure it’s an open casket. But, you know, open… after Charles crashes into it.

y/n: I’M BLOCKING ALL OF YOU.

lando: Can’t imagine how you'd even explain Max’s sudden appearance in your wardrobe to Charles. "He’s just helping with interior design, bro!" 😂

max: okay okay, enough. max: but for real, don’t tell charles anything yet.

daniel: Sure, we’ll keep the secret. For now. But we want front-row seats when you break the news.

y/n: Let me handle it before anyone here decides to run their big mouth.

lando: Big mouth? Me? Never. 😉

george: You know, this whole "keeping it secret" thing feels very Romeo and Juliet.

lando: Yeah but without the poison, please.

daniel: More like, Romeo hiding in Juliet’s closet while her brother lectures her for an hour. 😂

alex: "Romeo, why are you still in that closet?" alex: "Shhh, Charles will kill me."

max: i hate you all

alex: Don’t worry, Max. We’ll be at the next race, just in case Charles accidentally loses his brakes. 😂

y/n: You’re all the worst. 🙄

lando: Max, you better not be hiding in anyone else’s closet anytime soon. lando: Or else this group chat’s gonna have to upgrade to "Max’s Closet Chronicles: The Sequel."

y/n: Don’t give him ideas.

george: Max: Professional F1 Driver by day, Closet Houdini by night. 😭

max: i hate you all

y/n: Welcome to the club.

daniel: This is gonna be legendary.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

[marvelmusing]

Inseparable

Steve Rogers x GN!Reader

My Masterlist

You’ve been offering the Avengers legal advice for years. You helped them authorise their missions, and make sure they were protected from the government. In all your time working with them, you’ve never seen anything like the Accords.

“How’s it going?” Steve leans against the door frame of your office at the Avengers compound. You look up at him, the lamp beside you providing little light for you to see him properly. Sighing, you hold up the heavy document, as he sits beside you,

“I’ve highlighted everything I have an issue with.” Steve shifts closer to see the ridiculous amount of yellow highlighter as you flick through the pages. “As you can see it’s not looking great.”

“Thanks for reading through this, sweetheart. I really appreciate it.” You reach out and take his hand.

“Hey, it’s my job to protect you guys. You fight the bad guys. I make sure you keep your human rights.” You joke. Though after reading the Accords you realise it’s not too far from the truth. He gives you a small smile. You squeeze his hand gently. The news of Peggy’s death affected him much more than he let on. It breaks your heart to see him like this. “How’re you doing?” He sighs quietly.

“Not too bad.” You trace your thumb over his hand.

“When’s the funeral?”

“In two days.” You nod. The day of the Accords signing.

“I can come with you?” You offer, though it’s likely he’ll want to be alone. He shakes his head,

“You’re needed here.”

“Not if you need me.” He smiles at your insistence.

“Sam’s offered to come with me. I’ll be okay.” You nod, glad that Sam will be with him.

“I love you.” You whisper, as you pull his hand to your lips. He gives you another smile,

“Love you too.” You look down at the Accords.

“You don’t have to sign this, Steve. You can wait. Wait until I’ve made sure it’s safe, for everyone, to sign it. In the meantime you’ll just have to lay low. Be a little more domestic.” You smile at him softly, “We can have date night on Fridays, movie night on Saturdays, then we can have a roast on Sunday. You could try out some of your Ma’s old recipes.” He seems comforted by your suggestion.

“Is this a sneaky way of getting me to cook you dinner?” You smirk at him, glad he’s smiling more.

“Perhaps?” You rest your head against his shoulder, and he places a kiss against your forehead. “We’ll sort this out, my love.”

“Thank you, doll.”

You’re thinking of Steve when you’re in Vienna, when politicians mention how they wish he was there you agree with them. You do wish he was here. Though you know he’ll never sign the Accords as they are now. You stand at the back of the room, among the hoards of diplomats, assistants, and translators. Then the bomb goes off, and the chaos erupts. You soon find Natasha, and the two of you make it out. You both help with evac before finding out King Chaka is amongst the casualties. And that the main suspect for the bombing is the Winter Soldier. Bucky Barnes. Steve’s best friend. Natasha goes to sit with Prince T’Challa. You decide to take a walk along the street, to clear your head. You look down at your phone, seeing Steve’s name flash up on the screen. You answer quickly,

“Hey.”

“You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I was near the back, so I got lucky.” You hear Steve breathe a sigh of relief, in the background of the call you hear a police siren. You hear the same siren as the car pulls up across the street from you. You stand up, looking around for Steve. You can’t spot him. “I know you’ll want to find Bucky. But please, stay home. I can sort this out.”

“You saying you’ll arrest me?”

“No. I won’t. But someone will. We said we’d lay low after the signing. You’re not going to are you?”

“Doll, if he’s this far gone. I should be the one to bring him in.”

“Steve. Stay safe, please.”

“I love you.”

“Love you too, Rogers.” You hear him hang up. You look around, hoping to see him somewhere. No sign of him. You sigh, hoping he won’t do anything drastic.

Then you find out Steve’s been arrested. Along with Sam, Bucky, and King T’Challa. So you head to the Task Force Headquarters in Berlin. You watch as they bring Bucky in, locked in a large metal cell. You frown in annoyance. You head towards the black van that’s just parked up. The door is opened and Steve gets out, with Sam, and T’Challa behind him. You stand next to Agent Carter and Agent Ross, a large number of soldiers surrounding the area. Steve looks towards Bucky before turning his gaze to you.

“What’s gonna happen?” He asks as he strides towards your group.

“Same thing that ought to happen to you. Psychological evaluation, and extradition.” You frown at Ross.

“This is Everett Ross,” you introduce him. “Deputy Task Force Commander.”

“What about a lawyer?” Steve asks. Ross smiles,

“A lawyer, that’s funny.”

“I’m working on it.” You tell Steve. Ross gives you a hard stare, which you return.

“Agent Carter, see their weapons are placed in a lockup. We’ll write you a receipt.”

“I better not look out the window and see anybody flying around in that.” Sam comments as the group follows Ross. You stay close to Steve’s side, as he glances back at Bucky. Bucky’s eyes meet Steve’s then glance to you momentarily. He looks almost resigned to his fate. You take a breath before calling out to Ross,

“Why isn’t Sergeant Barnes with the rest of the group?” He laughs quietly,

“You’re kidding?” You shake your head at him. “You’re asking why one of the world's deadliest assassins isn’t walking next to us?”

“The Winter Soldier is one of the world’s most deadly assassins. Sergeant Barnes is America’s longest serving prisoner of war. If this is the respect you give our veterans you should be ashamed of yourself.” Ross isn’t laughing anymore.

“He blew up the UN.”

“Innocent until proven guilty.” You counter. “What proof do you have that he did it?”

“He was photographed at the scene.”

“One grainy photograph is hardly substantial evidence, Commander.” He sighs, knowing that you won’t drop this,

“I’m not the one you should be taking this up with.”

“Who is then?” He gestures towards the glass windows of the office you’re approaching. Where Tony is standing, talking on the phone. After a brief exchange between your groups, Steve sits in one office with Tony. Whilst you stay with Sam and Nat in another office nearby. You look over to Steve as he and Tony talk. It doesn’t take long before their voices are raised at one another. Steve soon heads out and joins you and Sam. Nat goes to stand with Tony whilst the UN psychologist talks with Bucky. You press a button on the intercom which allows you to hear what’s going on. Steve looks down at the photograph taken of Bucky, supposedly when he was in Vienna.

“Why would the Task Force release this photo of him anyway?” Sharon tries to justify it. You have an awful fear that something’s about to happen. Then the power goes out. You tell Steve where they’re holding Bucky, and with that Steve and Sam rush off. You don’t know at the time, but that’s the last time you see Steve for some time.

He gives you one call. He explains that he’s still in Berlin. That he has to go to Siberia, to stop the doctor from releasing the Winter Soldiers. You tell him you understand, you know he has to do this. He tells you to take care of yourself. You tell him to be safe. That you love him. He loves you back. You hear about the fight at the airport. That Sam, Clint, Wanda, and Scott have been arrested and sent to the Raft. Secretary Ross ignores your demands to see them. You hope that, wherever Steve and Bucky are, they’re safe. Then you see Tony. He seems uncomfortable around you. Like he’s seeing Steve everytime he looks at you, and when that thought crosses his mind, he seems guilty. Like he hasn’t told you something.

Months go by. You don’t hear from Steve at all. Random government agents keep stopping by your apartment to ask you about Steve. It makes you consider leaving, going somewhere else, away from everything that’s happened. But you stay, in the hope that it’ll help Steve find you. One morning you’re woken up by someone hammering at your door. You pull yourself out of bed, and head to the door. It’s some more government agents. They seem new to the game, their threats are half hearted and once you recite all the laws they’d be breaking if they entered your apartment they soon lose their mojo.

“Listen, I have no idea where Captain Rogers is. I assure you, if he happens to swing by, you will be the first to know.” Like hell you’d tell them. They see that you’re not budging, say their goodbyes and leave. It’s not even half an hour until there’s another knock at your door. Granted it’s more gentle than your morning wake up, but it still grates at your nerves. You head to the door, calling out, “For the last Goddamn time, I have no idea where Steve,” you pull open your door. “Rogers is.” You whisper out the last part, shocked by the sight in front of you. It’s him. It’s Steve. You throw yourself into his arms, pulling inside the apartment. He breathes your name against your neck, holding you as close as possible. He pulls back, cupping your face in his hands, looking you up and down.

“Are you alright?” He asks. You laugh a little,

“Am I alright? Steve, what happened to you? I heard Tony say you fought, nobody told me what happened. I feared the worst.”

“I’m okay, I promise. I’m so sorry for leaving you.” You shake your head,

“You did what you had to do. It’s okay, my love.” He nods, pulling you close again.

“I broke our friends out of the Raft.” You look up at him. You know he’d never leave them to pay for standing with him. You nod,

“Bucky?”

“He’s safe.”

“Good.” He squeezes your waist, wanting you closer than ever. He sighs,

“I know you wanted to fix this. I’m sorry, doll. But I don’t see how we can work this out legally anymore.” You shake your head,

“We can’t. That doesn’t matter to me anymore. As long as I have you, that’s all that matters to me.” He sighs,

“I’ll be running from the law now. I’ll let you know how I am when I can. I-” You pull away from him, frowning. You head to your kitchen. “Sweetheart, I know it’s not ideal-” You reach into the cupboard under the sink and pull out the emergency bag you kept hidden there.

“I’m coming with you.” You turn back to him as his eyes widen in surprise.

“It’ll be dangerous.”

“I know. But you’re not leaving me here.” He knows that look on your face. There’s nothing you can’t argue your way out of. He smiles at you,

“Wouldn’t dream of it, doll.”

[xiaotopia]

Longing For You

Pairing: Fem reader x Aether

Words: 10k+ I lost count

Genre: one-shot, platonic relationship, fuff, angst, slight crack if you squint

Cw // mentions of character death, blood

Hi! It's my first time writing on here and I just write what's on my mind I'm sorry if this is bad since english is not my first language ㅠㅠ I promise I will get better with my writing! Enjoy ^^

Lonely.

That's what you are feeling. It's been 3 days you got stuck in this unknown land. You thought it was beautiful, it really was. But will you be ready to face what's in front of you?

You manage to survive with fruits like apples and cashews, at least that's what you thought the name was, because in your world they called it cashews. Even though it doesn't really give you enough nutritions, as long as you get to live you're okay with it. Heck there were almost nothing here. You wanted to explore the place more but there are monsters everywhere, and you- with no weapon, could only run and hide in hopes of not getting spotted by them. Will you ever survive?

Sighing, "just another day like this I guess"

you said before drifting to dreamland under a tree in a secluded area of the unknown land.

----

"She's still breathing"

"Paimon! What are you doing?!"

You could hear someone whispering- half screaming to be exact, at someone but you are more bothered at someone poking your arm with a stick. Groaning, you woke up and realized someone invaded your place. Ready to fight whoever that was, your actions suddenly come to a halt when you meet a pair of golden eyes and his tiny little companion. They were as shocked as you, well... I guess you are more shocked to see a floating kid beside the blonde boy.

Quickly, you hide behind a tree. Since you don't have any weapon to defend yourself what else can defend you other than a tree?

"w-who are you?! And why you can float?!"

you shrieked, the little floating kid crossed her arms and scoffed at your question. Why would she scoffed at you?

"excuse me young lady but we're the one who should ask you that!".

You just meet her now but god knows how much her high-pitched voice started to annoy you. The blonde boy beside her started to speak up before his companion could even say a word,

"I'm sorry she bothered you. I'm Aether, and this is my travel companion, Paimon. We found a group of hilichurls around here and we already fight them off before it could reach your campsite. May we know what is your name?" he asks as his pair golden orbs stares straight into you.

"Uh.. My name is y/n..."

He smiles, assuring you that they're safe and can be trusted, you slowly got out behind the tree when he stretches out his hand for a handshake. You grab his hand, reciprocating his action. "it's nice to meet you y/n".

----

"No"

"Aether c'mon please?"

"ugh fine"

It's been a month you had stayed in Monstadt, The Land of Freedom, and a month since your encounter with Aether and Paimon. She still annoys you though, but you're really grateful that she can keep the conversation going because it always turns awkward whenever you tried to initiate a conversation with people. You learned that Aether didn't come from this world too, separated from his sister by the unknown god and now is looking for her in Teyvat. Hopefully, you can go back home too.

You missed your family of course but you're also happy that there are people who willing to take care of you, especially Barbara. She treated you like her own sister, beside Jean. You learned everything here from Lisa and learned how to fight from the cavalry captain Knights of the Favonious, Kaeya. And Diluc? He's hot, but cold as ice at the same time and you went to the Tavern once, only to see him talking to a bard named Venti, about how the bard needs to stop drinking all of his dandelion wine before he runs out of it because of him.

Now, Aether is in front of you as you manage to persuade him to bring you to one of his adventures. He never let you tag along because he told you it's dangerous outside. Both of you are no vision holders, but he has the power of Anemo. It's still a mystery to you but he's an outlander so it would probably make sense why he can have such powers even without a vision blessed by the Archons.

"But! You only have to fight the hilichurls only while I take down those mitachurls, got it?" he says. Nodding your head aggressively, you started your journey with him as an adventurer.

"Let's go to Liyue!" Paimon says excitedly.

---

"That was close, thank you y/n"

Aether pants heavily, letting out a sigh of relief as you kick off the last hilichurl with your sword. Turning around to face him, you tell him it's nothing.

You three bumped into a hilichurl camp in the middle of the road of Bishui Plans. Unfortunately, those group of monsters noticed you before you three could even hide.

You were about to follow Paimon but Aether called you, you look at him as his face expressed shocked. You asked him what's wrong only him to point at your hips. You were confused so you look down where he's pointing at. Well now you're equally as shocked as him, if not because of the shining crystal blue orb hanging on your belt.

"What... I-I swear it wasn't there before?"

You whispered, questioning yourself because how did it get there? How did you even got a vision? What did you do? You know it's a vision because Lisa has taught you at the library back in Mondstadt. How? That was all in your mind.

You hear Paimon gasped, putting her hands on her mouth, "you got a vision! Let me see!". She flew to look at your vision before touching it to get a better look. "You got a cryo vision!" she exclaimed.

"Cryo? You mean I get the power of ice?" You question her. She nodded her, "Yes! Now you can help Aether to fight enemies!". Looking down at your feet, sighing. Aether asked you what's wrong and you simply said you don't know how to fight. Like actually fighting enemies with your own power, how to use it and how to handle it. What if you unintentionally hurt people around you? Aether chuckled at your response. You look up at him, tilting your head in confusion.

"Don't worry, I'll teach you"

----

"I wish kaeya was here"

"You don't like it when I teach you?!"

Chuckling at your friend, you said it's not that you don't like it when he teaches you. It's because "it would be easier if a cryo vision holder teaches me how to control the element", you says.

He let out a puff, while you were stroking Paimon's hair on your lap. She snores softly and you swear you could hear her mumbling sticky honey roast in her sleep. Giggling at her, you wonder how can she be cute and annoying at the same time. It's unfair you think. You turned your head to look at Aether and he was zoned out, as always.

"Mind telling me what's in your mind?"

You picked up his habits quite quickly, since you both attached to the hips all the time. You would notice he always does this when he's deep in thought. The same goes for him. You both can read each other like an open book.

He looks at you, smiling. Shaking his head and tells you he always thinks the same, about his sister. You smiled back at him, you assured him that you will meet her soon. And now, you both enjoy the calm breeze as you both watched the sun set over the blue horizon at the nearby cliff in Liyue.

"S-sticky honey roast... "

----

Annoyed.

That's how you feel right now.

This guy just keeps pestering you for 20 minutes now. You got separated with Aether as he got something to do with Zhongli, the Wangsheng Parlor Funeral Consultant. Aether wanted to let Paimon stay with you but you said you're fine on your own and you would enjoy alone time in the time being while waiting for them.

But you didn't expect this.

"Can you stop following me now?"

"Why would I?"

Rolling your eyes, you bump into his shoulder, or Childe as he call himself.

"Oh don't be like that girlie-" " I have a name shut up" you sigh for the nth time. You need to avoid this man, because he's one of the Fatui, you don't want to involve yourself and Aether with them. That's why you've been running and avoiding him at all cost.

"Well you never tell me your name girlie-"

"It's y/n okay? Now go you're getting on my nerve..."

you mumbled the last sentence. He only chuckles at your reaction as he enjoys it. You were buying some street food from the food stall and before you could give your mora to the seller, someone beats you to pay for the food. You were not complaining though, you didn't thank him either.

"Okay then but can I ask you one last question, y/n?" he smiles widely while you only look at him, chewing your spicy fish cake, unamused. His question however, almost send you to you death as you were choking on your food.

"W-what did you say?!" "I want to get to know about you"

Aether is not going to like this...

----

As expected, he was mad. No, he was furious.

"Why did you talk to him?!"

"I tried not to talk to him Aether, he kept following me when I tried to avoid him! To the point he creeps me out..."

Aether sighs, rubbing his forehead as Paimon watched you two arguing. Was this the only time Paimon shuts her mouth? Excluding the time she's asleep. She knows when to silent herself because this time, Aether is different in Paimon's eyes.

"So.. Did you agree?" he questioned, not giving you a glance. You shake your head, "No, of course I didn't. He's dangerous and he could hurt us if he has the opportunity..." Which is true. Childe is a harbinger, and you, just a mortal from another world who just got dumped to Teyvat out of nowhere.

Aether engulfs you in a hug, which surprised you. You could feel your cheeks burning from the physical contact. His arm wraps around your shoulder while the other strokes your hair, calming you.

"I won't let that happen to you, Paimon and me. I won't let him hurt us, I will promise you that I will protect you both from any danger. I don't want to lose another friend..." he says and the last sentence sounds more like a whisper to you but you understand him.

You also promised to yourself that you will protect paimon and him. Because you love them.

----

"Well traveller, you're quite stronger than I thought"

"Stay away from him!"

You yelled at the harbinger, keeping yourself from falling as you struggled to stand up. Paimon tried her best to keep Aether awake while you were guarding them, ready to attack him anytime.

Childe let out a loud laugh, as if he was mocking you and your companion. Shaking his head, he came closer to you.

"You know what, you're lucky that you didn't fall for my tricks" he chuckles. You were getting antsy everytime he take a step closer to you, "no one is fool enough to fall for a harbinger, Tartaglia" you sneered.

He was about to attack you with his hydro sword but you managed to dodged it with your power and turning it into an ice. You both fight for a while and fortunately, Aether came to help you.

After hours of fighting, that's what you think, you feel drained out. Slumping on the floor, you take a glance at Aether he was panting hard, Paimon at his side to support him. And Childe, he looks better than both you and Aether combined but he's still in a good shape.

As you were trying to stand up, you saw a glimpse of a woman at the corner of your eye. You widen your eyes and tried to push Aether away as you saw the woman was about to attack him with her sharp ice.

Signora.

You made a wall of ice to protect Aether and Paimon from her attacks. However, you didn't do it for you. You didn't protect yourself and got hit by the ice. The ice wall from you melts, so does Aether's world when he saw you, bleeding from your own element.

Childe was as shocked too, he thought you were a genuine person, he really do. Is this what it feels when you know someone personally got hurt? He can't imagine what Aether feels now.

You fell, you felt dizzy as you hit your head on the solid ground.

"Y/n!" Aether and Paimon yelled your name, but why do they sound like they're miles away?

"Y/n! Keep your eyes open! Don't you very dare to close your eyes!" Your friend screamed. Paimon is holding your hand while sobbing on you. "Y/n you can't leave us! Paimon still want to have fun with you!"

All you can do is cry. You don't want to leave them. You still haven't find your way back home, you can't. But you were losing so much blood and all you could do is remembering your moments with your friends.

Aether and Paimon.

Aether holds you on his lap, you could feel his tears falling on your cheek. He cups your cheek as he stares into your (e/c) orbs. To him, it resembles the stars on the night sky. He wish he could look at them like this before.

Not when you're dying.

He put his forehead on yours as he keeps repeating "please don't leave" to you. You promised him that you will protect him, but not stay with him. Did you regret it? Yes. You wish you could stay but you knew at the end, both of you will leave eventually.

But you didn't expect that you would leave them like this.

With all your might, you hover your hand over his that was on your cheek, rubbing it softly. "Promise me, we will meet someday, wether it be in our next life or in different universe, promise me we will meet again" you said, voice getting hoarse and staring to his golden eyes. You want to remember his eyes, his nose, his lips, his everything.

"Paimon doesn't want you to leave!" your little friend cried, you let out a loud sob as you pull her to your chest, soaking your bloody shirt with her tears. You three tried to cherish your last moment together, even though it was a tragic one, like now.

Aether tighten his hold on you, Paimon cries harder when she saw the colour of your vision starting to fade, knowing you couldn't make it.

"Paimon loves you, y/n", all you can do is cry, before your last breathe you hear Aether says "I promise you, we will meet again.. I love you"

Your vision faded, you fall into a deep sleep and everything turns dark.

----

"She's awake!"

"Call the doctor!"

You slowly opened your eyes, the bright light hurting your eyes, still adjusting to the surrounding. You could feel your tears were falling. Why did you cry? Then it hit you.

You were in the hospital.

You remember what happened, was that all just a dream? It feels real, way too real for your liking.

"Thank god, you're finally awake!" your mom sobs. Wait, your mom is here? You're finally back? You were supposed to be happy but why did you feel sad?

"H-how long did I... Sleep?" you asked, voice raspy as your throat lacks of hydration. Your mom gave you a glass of water and you gladly drink it, your throat still hurt.

"2 months now, you got hit by a car and the guy felt bad. He even insisted to pay for your bills", your mom says as she hold your hand. It's been a few minutes but you missed them. Aether and your little friend Paimon.

"Oh.." that's all you can say. You really don't know what to respond. You were happy that you're finally awake but you also missed people you met in Teyvat. Are they real or just your imagination?

"I forgot to tell you, the person who pays for your hospital bill will visit you. He always visits you when me and your dad is busy with work", you nodded your head, didn't have the energy to reply your mom back.

Suddenly, the door opens, revealing a tall man. You face him, only to widen your eyes as you were shocked to see the person in your dream.

"Childe?"

----

It's been a month since you got discharged from the hospital and been recovering well. You still struggle to walk on your own though, but nothing serious. Ever since you met childe, you both got along very well, not like the one in your dream.

"So... What I dreamed of during my coma was real?" You asked him, walking through the flowery path as the cherry blossom falls on the ground beside him arms clinging to his.

"Yeah. In fact, I'm still the same Childe in your dream!"

"Yeah as you wish. The only same thing is you keep paying things for me.. And being annoying"

You remarked. He only laughs and told you the reason why he keeps doing that is that it's the only kind action he could do, even now. But in reality, he felt guilty. He

"By the way, I want you to meet an old friend of mine. You won't mind right?"

"What's the point of asking me if you're going to introduce your friend to me now?"

"Geez woman, you're still the same"

you could only laugh at him. To you, he's a good friend but no one could replace Aether. If you met Childe, there's a possibility of you to meet Aether and Paimon right?

"Oi blondie! We're here!" Childe yelled, getting you out from your deep thoughts. You look up only to meet a pair of golden eyes that you've missed so much.

It feels like the time has stopped. He walked towards you and slowly, engulfed you in a hug. You were stunned, you meet him. You both found each other. You hugged him back, tightly. You let out tears of joy, he was relieved he found you that he also cried.

"You didn't forget me don't you?" You hear a feminine voice behind Aether, only to find Paimon crossing her arms, just like when you meet her for the first time. But what amazes you that she's in a different form. She looks... Like you. A woman.

Your eyes got teary again and went straight to her, giving her a big hug which she reciprocated. "I miss you so much Paimon" you burried your head into her neck. Paimon was happy she could meet her.

Childe and Aether could only look both of you with adoration. Aether cleared his throat, without looking at the man beside him, eyes still on you. "Thank you, if it wasn't for you, we wouldn't find her"

The red haired man could only smile, "it's no problem. I couldn't face anyone after what happened in Teyvat. Think of this as my way to apologize". Aether couldn't answer, he only nodded his head to let him know he's listening.

You went to him only get a hug from you. You missed him so much. And you noticed Aether doesn't have his long braided hair anymore, which saddens you because you always play and braid his hair.

"I noticed that you finally got rid of your annoyingly long hair", you teased him. You hear him chuckled as he tightened his grip around you. "Can't let the annoyingly long hair distract people sweetie. People found it weird here"

"But I like it though..." you blushed at the pet name he gave you. You both just couldn't let go of each other now. He strokes your hair, enjoying each others presence. "I'm so glad that I found you", "me too, I'm glad you're here".

The other two friend only watched you two reunited again, hugging each other and won't let each other go because you missed each other so much that you both are afraid one of you vanished anytime. But it's real.

"Childe can we get some sticky honey roast?"

"Good grief, paimon.."

[notalwaysright]

https://notalwaysright.com/?p=259442 (One of my classmates and I are goofing off in class, mostly telling jokes. He’s really into those “yo momma” jokes and has told quite a lot of them. I’m getting quite bored of these jokes, to be honest, so I’m trying to curtail them.) Me: “Dude, can we do some other jokes now? These mom jokes are getting repetitive.” Classmate: “Your mom doesn’t mind me going in repetitively!” Me: “Dude. Seriously? You’re going after *my* mom now?” Classmate: “More like she’s going after me!” Me: “Alright, you might want to quit while you’re ahead. My mom passed away, so these jokes are in quite poor taste, if I do say so myself.” Classmate: “Yeah, right! Everyone says that when it’s their mom being roasted!” Me: “No, I mean it. Cut it out.” (Another classmate who has been overhearing our conversation decides to speak up on my behalf.) Other Classmate: “Actually, [Classmate], he’s telling the truth. His mom died two years ago. I was even at the funeral.” Classmate: “No way! I see [My Name]’s mom dropping him off at school every morning!” Other Classmate: “That’s his aunt, you dipshit!” (My classmate has gone from a joking mood, to a more worried, crestfallen look.) Classmate: “Wait, really?” Other Classmate: “Yes, really! You really dropped the ball on this one, [Classmate]!” Classmate: “Oh. Oh no. Excuse me for a moment, guys.” (My classmate leaves the classroom and doesn’t come back for at least 10 minutes. When he does come back, he grabs his stuff and moves to another desk. We stop speaking to each other for a couple of weeks, until one day, during lunch, he finally approaches me.) Classmate: “Hey, [My Name], I know this is long overdue, and I should’ve done this right away, but I want to apologize for making tasteless jokes about your mother. I went too far and I should’ve stopped at your first warning.” (I had actually briefly forgotten why we stopped talking, but then I remembered the cause of it all, and I’m trying not to laugh.) Me: “Oh, you mean THAT incident. Don’t worry about it, [Classmate]. If anything, *I’m* the one who should be sorry.” Classmate: *confused* “And why is that?” Me: “My mom’s not actually dead. I just said that so you’d stop repeating so many old yo-momma jokes.” Classmate: “But what about the things [Other Classmate] said?” Me: “Yeah, now that was the real twist. None of this was pre-meditated. I never asked him to say those things for me. He just started backing me up for some reason, so I rolled with it. He really sold it, didn’t he?” Classmate: “Damn right he did! I almost had a goddamn heart attack! I felt so bad about the whole ordeal that it took me this long to work up the courage to talk to you again! God, I can’t believe this!” (It was right there that I started laughing. This was by far the biggest return investment I’ve got from a prank. In true teenage boy fashion, it was all water under the bridge and we’ve become close friends, and remain so to this day.) Source: https://notalwaysright.com/?p=259442

[inky-duchess]

21 History Ancedotes for my 21st Birthday

So today I celebrate my 21st birthday and I have decided to gift you all with 21 of my favourite historical Ancedotes. Some are funny, some are sad and some are plain bizarre but I hope the make your day 💜

Mary Maloney, an Irish-born suffragette in England followed Winston Churchill around while he was campaigning for a seat in Parliament, drowning out everything he said with a very large bell and calls for him to apologise for his comments on women's rights and suffrage movements.

Clodius Pulcher was a well born Roman noble during the last day's of the Republic. He gave up his Patrician status to become Tribune of the Plebs (an office in which one had to be a Pleb) by being adopted by a much younger Plebian man who became his "father". Clodius was a bit of a riot, sneaking into religious festivals dressed like a woman to sleep with Caesar's wife, building a shrine to Liberty in the ruins of the Conservative Cicero, vetoed the last speech of one of the Consuls (who basically did nothing all year and was apparently going to roast Caesar) and burned down the Senate House with his funeral pyre (the Plebs who loved him literally tearing up the furniture to build his pyre). He was honestly the best fun.

When laying on her deathbed, Queen Caroline of Ansbach turned to her husband George II of England and told him he should marry again. George refused to ever wed again... But added he would have mistresses. Caroline said , likely with a roll of her eyes, "oh my god that doesn't matter."

Florence was a pretty cool city in the Renaissance until Savanorola came to town. He disliked the loose living artists that crowded the city, with their naked pagan gods and rampant homosexuality. He expelled them all with help of the French hoping to make Florence Holy Again. When the Borgia Pope excommunicated him and sentenced him to death, one man in the crowd was reported to have said. "thank God, niw we can return to sodomy." One Floretine man in the 1490s said Gay Rights.

So this list couldn't be complete without an entry of the only American politician I love, Alexander Hamilton who was just a walking entity of sass. I could go on about his sharp sarcasm or his disaster bi vibes with John Lauren's but my all time favourite Alexander Hamilton ancedote has to be this exchange with Thomas Jefferson "There are approximately 1010300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly explain how much I want to hit you with a chair."

Caterina Sforza was an Italian noble woman during the Renaissance. She was apart of the powerful Sforza family, which drew many enemies to her. One fateful day at Forli, Caterina's children were snatched as hostages. The besiegers threatened to kill her children if she did not cede the castle. Caterina refused, lifting her skirts and shouted to the besiegers that she had the means to make more children.

Hannibal Lecter's creator Thomas Harris was happy to end his great character's story with the original trilogy. However his publishers forced him to write an unneeded prequel explaining why Hannibal became Hannibal. Thomas Harris agreed lest he lose the rights to his character so he wrote Hannibal Rising, where Hannibal as a young man hunts down the Nazis who ate his sister with a katana.

Nell Gwyn is my favourite mistress of Charles II, mainly because of her sass. Once while trapped in the middle of a riot where Londoners swamped her carriage thinking she was Charles's Catholic mistress. She popped her head out the carriage and told the people "Pray good people be civil. I am the Protestant whore." She also dosed her rival Moll Davis with laxatives in order to free up some of Charles's time and she once flashed her underwear at the French ambassador after asking him why the Franch King did not pay her to spy on Charles because she was with him every night. A true Queen.

Emperor Ai of the Han Dynasty of China once rose from his bed to go do some ruling when he realised his lover, Dong Xian was sleeping on his sleeve. Rather than disturb his lover, the Emperor cut his sleeve off at the wrist to leave Dong Xian nap. Nothing has ever been more romantic than that. Y'all could never.

Princess Margaret the sister of current Queen Elizabeth II was a socialable Princess and often tasked to visit the up and coming music stars of the day on behalf of the Crown. When meeting the Beatles one evening, she noticed George Harrison was acting a little odd. When she asked what was the matter, he replied "We arent allowed eat until you go." Princess Margaret laughed and promptly left so the Beatles could get some dinner.

During the Siege of Jadotsville, Irish soldiers under the flag of the UN were attacked and besieged by local insurgents allied with the Katanga Regime. The insurgents numbered thousands while the Irish only had 158 soldiers, all who were lightly armed. They radioed to their allies assuring them that "we will hold out until our last bullet is spent. Could use some whiskey though".

Napoleon was famous for writing raunchy letters to his wife, the Empress Josephine while he was away. She used to reply with really mundane letters or not at all. She really just could not be bothered with him.

Josip Broz Tito was so fed up with Joseph Stalin sending assassins to kill him, he wrote to Stalin personally to say "If you don't stop sending assassins to kill me. I will send one to Moscow and I won't have to send another." It didn't work but Big Dick Energy.

Successful Roman soldiers returning from war often got to march along in parades known as Triumphs. During this, it was customary for them to sing bawdy songs about their commander. One surviving one about Caesar goes like this "Romans, lock up your wives. Here comes the bald adulterous whore. We pissed away your gold in Gaul and come to borrow more."

Matilda, Lady of the English was a woman so badass that history cannot handle her. She was the daughter of Henry I who left his throne to her after the death of her brother. She was away in France when her father died and her throne was snatched by her cousin Stephen. They battled back and forth for years with neither side ceding any ground. Matilda was once besieged in a castle during a snow storm, with Stephen's men all around her. Instead of fighting her way out. She simply donned a white cloak and walked out of the castle. Just walked out without any of Stephen's men seeing her.

Pedro of Portugal once fell in love with a beautiful lady in waiting called Inez de Castro. For years, they lived as man and mistress, popping out a few kinds. Pedro's dad really did not like Inez and wanted Pedro to find a legitimate wife so he had her killed. Pedro returned home to find the mother of his children dead. Pedro went a little crazy. He had all his father's assassins killed, ripping out their hearts as they had done to him. When Pedro ascended the throne, he demanded the Pope legitimize his children by Inez. The Pope not wanting to upset the King, said he couldn't because Inez was never crowned Queen. Pedro dug Inez up and crowned her as Queen, having all the nobility swear loyalty to her corpse. The Pope had no choice but to agree to his request.

A famously clever general once saved an entire city with an ingenious stragety to sit outside the city waiting for the attacking army to come. The attack had come to fast for the city to ready themselves for a Siege so, the general had to move quickly. He evacuated the city and took his place waiting for the army to come. The enemy forces stopped and took one look at him and bolted, thinking he meant to lure them in one of his famous traps.

Michaelangelo was really badly treated by the Vatican when he was painting the Sistine Chapel. He constantly fought with the Popes over the design and his work, which he was paid peanuts for. Michaelangelo got his revenge in his work, painting the gates of Hell behind the Papal Throne and an angel flipping the ol' fig (the Renaissance version of the bird) toward the Pope's chair.

Peter the Great was not a perfect guy. He kept serfdom as a practise in his kingdom, he had his son tortured to death and he could be an unpleasant guy. But Peter was a dreamer. He wanted nothing more to build a fleet for Russia and bring Russia beyond its borders. Peter took a gap year from ruling Russia to wander around Europe. When he stopped in England, he was granted Leicester House to chill in while he did his shipwright studies. It was here that Peter found a new passion. The wheelbarrow. Cue Peter and his new found English buddies drinking in Leicester House, punching the artwork and rolling each other around in barrels across the house's Great gardens.

Diogenes is hands down a walking shit post. He was a great thinker in Greece during the reign of Alexander but a rather dry, sarcastic wit. He lived in a pithos/a jar because he shunned all vanities and values of society. He trolled other philosophers, attending their debates to heckle them and eat loud foods through them. When Alexander the Great came to fan boy over him, saying that if he were not Alexander he would like to be Diogenes to which Diogenes just said "yeah me too, now get out of my sunlight."

Cosimo de Medici was the son of a Floretine banker with a great knowledge and love of art. Cosimo wished for Florence to release its potentially and join the Renaissance. He hired Filippo Brunelleschi to finsh the Great Dome of Santa Maria del Fiore which had láin unfinished for over a century, a symbol of a failure of ambition. The builders had lost the knowledge of creating a dome so large so it remained unfinished. Despite much opposition from the other nobility and denouncers of the Renaissance, Cosimo's dream of the completion of the dome was completed, making it the largest brick dome in creation at that time. There is nothing like achieving your dreams and certainly nothing like leaving a lasting reminder that screams 'I was right and you were wrong' to stand for centuries.

[purebarnes]

courage to change—

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ ➢ taken place six months after endgame, y/n stark gets a call from none other than sam wilson— being confused on why he had called her. wanting to go after a new villain. she was obligated at first but knew it was her friend that needed help. she never thought she would go back into become a hero after her loss.

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ ➢ 2.1k

ᴅɪꜱᴄʟᴀɪᴍᴇʀꜱ ➢ fluff all around. nothing extreme.

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ ꜱᴘᴇᴀᴋꜱ ! ➢ this is my first time writing on tumblr so if it’s bad then sorry!! i enjoyed writing this so if you do like it then please let me know.

months have passed without tony stark, everything became quiet, a loss is a loss with whatever you’re dealing with. this was more than a loss for y/n— especially pepper and morgan. they all thought that they would be a big, happy family but tragically that never was the case. thanos ruined everything for the girl and she lost her best friend and mother to people just like thanos. she told herself she would get back and start saving because no one saved her dad, sometimes it would bring nightmares to her.

she had to deal with everything and be with her family which more important, she didn’t talk or call anyone. there would be nights where she would cry herself to sleep with tony’s sweatshirt that she loved. the scent was still there and she never wanted to let it go because it was a part of her that wasn’t lost. morgan was always smiling for her half sister, it was like just yesterday was when the world went back together but she knew she just wanted to think about it like that. days would go by where she wouldn’t return peter’s phone calls and it wasn’t just because she didn’t want to. she knew her dad was an important figure to the boy— she thought she would break down in front of him.

helping around the house was essentially the part where she needed to help pepper. happy would stop by and occasionally drop off the cheeseburgers that both of the girls loved. it was those moments and little things that made her feel so much better. it didn’t help when the one person she cared about as much as her dad wouldn’t do anything to help her when she was in complete pain. bucky barnes was the man for her and she was there for him when he was struggling and when he wouldn’t talk to her after the funeral: he felt awful but that wouldn’t change anything at all.

the relationship started out fine and all though tony wasn’t pleased and supportive about the thing they had for each other. he would never tell her to break up with him or even if they weren’t— he wouldn’t try to break them off. he loved him for that, all the problems they had with his parents getting killed by the winter soldier. nothing mattered anymore, she threw that relationship out slowly but also painfully. she loved him and he loved her but they both weren’t mentally stable to be each other at that moment.

pacing around her room to calm herself from finding herself to have a panic attack, she hears her phone buzzing and looked up and walks over to see what it was about. she saw the name ‘sam <3’ she couldn’t help but smile at the contact, she’ll be honest it had been awhile but that didn’t matter at that moment. she took a deep breath and opened up the message.

sam <3: hey y/n... it’s been awhile and i should have asked you how you have been instead of now. i thought we could catch up, it’s just i wanted to see if you could help with something? think of it as a last mission type of thing, let me know. hope you are well

y/n knew sam meant well and maybe this could help her with everything that she was going through. this also meant she could suffer but she rather help another friend that needed something. she agreed to help him and visit him in louisiana. she typed back saying that she would be in town in a day or so. 

y/n stark ♡: of course i will come by! just give me a day or so, so i can get things ready to pack... you still have your boat? would love to see it!!

they talked nonstop about everything until she had to remind herself to tell pepper and to go and pack her things. she went into the kitchen where morgan was watching tv and eating a turkey sandwich that her mom prepared for her. pepper looked up, “hi, honey. you want a sandwich... turkey or roast beef?” she asked smiling, already pulling out the whole wheat bread. y/n smiled telling her she wanted one, “actually pepper... sam asked if i could go up to louisiana? he wanted to catch up and his family will be— of course you can go. we will be okay, just call me every night alright?” she went over to hug her step daughter. morgan saw them hugging and she couldn’t help but go and hug both of them.

later on the night, y/n had packed her suitcase with clothes and essentials she needed for her trip. she saw the glasses that tony had saved and left for her in any case of a tragic accident— she sighed grabbing them and placing them in her suitcase. she watched morgan and pepper at the porch entrance waving bye to her, happy had grabbed her bag and placed it in the back trunk of the limo. she thanked him and entered the limo while happy got in the other side of the limo. “how are you doing kiddo?” she looked up from her phone and stifled a small smile, “alright. just hoping this trip is going to be ok.”

they both focused on their phones and on the ride while they saw the entrance to the wilson family seafood. y/n saw sam and his sister talking as they all looked at the limo that stopped in front of them. the girl gave a right hug to happy when he told her to be safe and also to have fun— he gave her the suitcase before leaving. she saw sam and couldn’t help but smile widely and went to walk towards him. they were engulfed in a hug with warmth surround them, “ah, sam. i missed you.” she told him rubbing her hand on his backside. they both let go to meet each other in the eyes, “i missed you. come see sarah.”

sam and sarah were obviously close, sarah saw y/n and was putting down the crates her children helped her with. she went to go hug her and all this was something that she never got back because just isolated herself, “so sarah wants to sell our boat— whoa, you’re getting rid of this bad boy.” y/n spoke turning around to see the boat in her two eyes. sarah gave the girl a chuckle while continuing to leave into the boy where sam and y/n followed her on it. “sam, the boats gotta go—wait.” sam tried to intervene his sister but she wasn’t having it with him, “no. let me finish. i’m doin' everything i can to keep this business afloat. and everyday i’m making $5, and spending $10.” sarah told her brother.

“so, why won’t you let me help?—no, don’t start with that. we made a deal before daddy died. you’re out there—” y/n froze when sarah mentioned her fathers death and each time it kept eating y/n alive. she would do anything to make that feeling just leave for a small portion of the time. sam noticed she wasn’t present and sighed when she saw y/n, “y/n... i’m sorry.” sarah apologized and y/n told her it was fine and that it wasn’t her fault at all. she kept hearing on the conversation, “i do things my way her—right. but you tangled the house into this when you took those loans.” sarah punched her brother in the chest graining at the impact it made on him, “forgot how hard you hit, uh, y/n wait up here and then we can catch up. i will be back.” sam told her making y/n nod and chuckle, “don’t take too long.”

sam finished talking to his sister and once he came back—they went on side to have a drink and have a small conversation. sam poured her some non alcoholic drink as she didn’t drink that often, “so tell me. what have you been up to.” he asked the girl slouching on a chair and she took a sip, “if you know me sam, you would know nothing.” she told him looking down at her drink and in circles, “don’t torture yourself stark. i’m here now.” same went to give her a soft hug and she returned the hug smiling at him. “have you talked—no.” y/n told him since she didn’t want to talk about it or bucky as it brought memories.

sam asked if y/n could watch his nephews while he and sarah would go to the bank to ask for a loan, she didn’t hesitate to help him out. y/n woke up early and saw sam and sarah with her two children packing up the food they were going to give out. she walked over “morin'.” she spoke yawing while sam looked up to see her in a black t-shirt and shook his at her semi-messy hair, “morning y/n. you sleep good?” sarah asked packing up food, “honestly, yeah you guys have nice cushions.” she said honestly. “you always gotta do the most, huh?” she said asked.

“i don’t play with these white folks.” sam chuckled before continuing, “look, i know you’re worried, all right? but i did the research. i ran the numbers—you really think this is gonna work?” she said skeptical about it all and if sams plan would work, “I know it will. and then we can renovate the kitchen. now, you said you wanted to sell plates in the weekends, right? that’s great. you can introduce some of grandma’s recently... shit. we gotta go.”

sam looked at his watch and noticed the time and that he would be late but he was rather punctual. y/n furrowed her eyebrows as he wouldn’t be late, “you know me, no such thing as on time. you’re either early or late. pick one.” he told the girls, both of the siblings went to go get their jackets on. “all right, boys, i love you. now, y/n will be watching you and no video games.” sarah said kissing her sons on the forehead and looked at y/n to know that she would be helping her a lot.

once the wilson’s came back, y/n was hanging out with boys because she soon fell in love with both of them. being around the two boys made her feel special because it was something she walkways wanted. y/n was watching them play video games and she just admired them until sam came in to ask to steal her. “can you come here quick.” she nodded and walked over to sam and entered to the room where sam was in and he was explaining the video. it was the flag smashers—he didn’t look too nice. he saw the video of one of the flag smashers throwing a man acros towards the pole. “he looks strong—who are you?” they got interrupted as y/n scrunched her nose and surprised he didn’t know her.

“y/n. y/n stark—oh. oh, uh i am so sorry for your loss.” the man rambled while y/n laughed saying thank you and he kept going, “he was. i mean, they went dark as soon as it was all over. but that their m.o. we gotta keep our eyes and ears to the ground till they pop up again.” the man on the call told them. the young lady sighed not understanding how that could all be possible, “anything else happen outside the video?—no, man. my face was in the dirt before i knew what was happening. why? what are you thinking?” sam turned to y/n and they shared a look of unsteadiness, they both knew what they were both thinking. if something was out there then they needed to stop it, “nothin'—wait. you don’t think he could be a... look, i’ll circle back to you. let’s keep this between me and you.

a second later sarah came into the room turning on the television and telling both of them to look at was on the news. it appeared to be a press and y/n did think about it as anything until she heard what the man was saying.

“unrest, in the wake of recent events has left us vulnerable. every day Americans feel it. While we love heroes who put their lives on the line to defend earth, we also need a hero to defend this country. we need a real person who embodies america’s greatest values. we need someone to inspire us again, someone who can be a symbol for all of us. so, on behalf of the department of defense and our commander-in-chief, it is with great honor that we announce here today that the united states of america has a new hero. join me in welcoming your new captain america.” the man spoke and there was a man in a captain america uniform with steve’s shield over his arm. y/n rubbed her temples while sighing knowing this wasn’t good.

[translations-by-aiimee]

Dig a Grave to Dig Out a Ghost - Chapter 6

Original Title: 挖坟挖出鬼

Genres: Drama, Horror, Mystery, Supernatural, Yaoi

TW for this chapter: Sexual Assualt

This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.

Chapter Index

Chapter 6 - Shame

On the way back, Yin Zhou rocked back and forth while laughing in the car. He patted his thigh and breathed out: "Haha, little. . . little girl, that makes me an uncle. Lin Yan, you're truly are blessed. You've got a Loli handed right to you!"

Lin Yan couldn't stop the corners of his mouth from twitching. After joking with Yin Zhou for a while, his expression sank again. His hope was shattered, and the things in his hands were in a mess. The sunset falling on the horizon looked like a roasted sweet potato slice. Lin Yan couldn't help but laugh at himself. The night was coming. Who knew what would happen tonight? With twists and turns on the country road, a squirrel squatting on the ground picking up fruit was frightened suddenly by the car. It turned around and bumped into the tree. The little guy held onto the pine cones dumbfounded for a while before changing directions and fleeing.

Lin Yan felt that his current state was not much different from that silly squirrel.

After sending Yin Zhou home, Lin Yan sat in a roadside noodle shop until it closed before driving back. Since the start of all these strange things, the word 'home' has become synonymous with 'nightmare'. He didn't even have the courage to open the door, and he was even more unwilling to face the cold and decayed hellscape behind the door. Lin Yan clenched his fists, and a strong hatred rose from his heart. He had never harmed anyone, and he hadn't interfered with anyone. Why shouldn't he be allowed to live in peace?

The elevator climbed up from one floor to another; Floor 5, Floor 6, Floor 7. . .

Suddenly a burst of cold crawled up his back.

Lin Yan was already familiar with this feeling.

After a second of utter shock, he madly pressed the button to open the door. There was no response. The elevator rose slowly. The number on the display jumped to Floor 11 and stopped. There was a soft bang, and the whole elevator fell into a deep, never-ending darkness.

Lin Yan fumbled around on the wall to find the emergency call button, but his raised hand was blocked by something that shouldn't exist. A long sigh sounded in the solidified darkness, and he was crushed against the wall by huge brute force almost at the same time. The hands holding his arms were like a pair of iron tongs. It wasn't the kind of power that a human could exert, and it couldn't be counterbalanced at all. However, Lin Yan still struggled with all his strength and cursed fiercely: "Get away from me!"

That thing had never been so overbearing and crazy. It seems that Lin Yan's action of going out privately to ask for help from a witch doctor completely angered it. It grabbed Lin Yan's neck with cold hands and picked him up from the ground abruptly. Lin Yan kicked his feet, his weight and the power of that strange hand making him breathless. If the suffocation of last night was only a warning, then now it was like murder, with his breathing getting weaker and weaker and his vision blurring.

Lin Yan closed his eyes, his last bits of consciousness not enough to help him resist. The enclosed elevator was like a small coffin, the walls closing in on him. A sense of despair walked over him. It's all over; after this humiliating game of cat and mouse, the evil spirit is finally going to end this.

It's a pity that his life didn't have time to officially begin, so he would end with this grotesque finale.

As if perceiving Lin Yan's submission, the strange hand loosened around his neck. After the support keeping him up was gone, Lin Yan leaned on the metal wall and slid to the ground. Then freezing lips kissed his face. They slowly moved down, kissing his lips, neck, collarbone. . .

Psychotic, paranoid, irresistible.

"Fuck you. . . Fuck your mother and all your ancestors. . . You. . . Ah. . ."

Moist lips blocked his mouth. Lin Yan shook his head helplessly, but the thing didn’t care about the disgust he showed. It spread Lin Yan’s legs apart, kneeled between his knees, bent down and hugged his waist. It stretched its tongue into Lin Yan's mouth and sucked hard.

Lin Yan could even hear hissing in the darkness.

Like a grumpy beast, it was enjoying taunting its prey before going in for the slaughter.

The sound of entangled lips and teeth twitched Lin Yan's nerves that were already taut like a bowstring. His chin was also being pinched by the ghost hand. He could no longer restrain it, sobbing in despair and fear.

The buttons of the short-sleeved shirt were unbuttoned one by one, and a cold palm touched his chest, its fingers rubbing against his nipples.

"Let me go. . ."

"I beg of you. Let me go. . ."

After devastating his body with the most violent and fierce means, the ghost was slowly insulting his spirit. The experience of dying, again and again, told Lin Yan that this invisible power was saying: Your life is in my hands. No matter where you go, you can't escape me.

The shirt was dropped and tossed aside. The cold and damp tongue twirled on his nipple, and then licked and rubbed his lower abdomen. Lin Yan sat paralyzed on the ground, covering his face with his hands. He was completely defeated in this contest. His voice shook as he cried: "Please. . . let me go. . ."

The thing stopped. It pulled on Lin Yan's wrist to make him stand up and kissed his eyebrows as if it were trying to soothe him. When the light flicked back on, the elevator trembled like it was suddenly awakening from a deep sleep. The hollow sound of the parts spurred, and the green arrow in the middle moved upstream like a fish.

On the eleventh and twelfth floors, Lin Yan couldn't see clearly, but his body's sense of touch became much more sensitive. The ghost squeezed him against the wall, rubbing his waist vigorously with both hands. There was a layer of goosebumps on his bare chest. He could even feel the monster's clothes; the soft fabric, wide sleeves, probably funeral clothes. There were silk-like things hanging onto his chest. It took a long time for Lin Yan to realize that it was hair.

He imagined strands of long black hair clinging to a rotten face, and his bones twitched.

The elevator door opened.

He was dragged out of the elevator by the invisible force, pressed hard against the door panel, and was repeatedly kissed and tasted as though he were a dish. Its hands untied his belt and unabashedly caught his limp member and threw itself down, impatient and eager. Lin Yan’s head hit the coffee table with a bang, and the pain stimulated his almost numb nerves. Lin Yan began to swear using the most vicious and vulgar language he could think of, but this power did not stop. The rough palms pressed roughly against Lin Yan's body, and then it swallowed even more once it got the sexual response it was looking for, desperately and madly pleased.

Lin Yan bit his tongue until it bled, spewing one curse after another until his throat became hoarse. The monster's swallowed faster and deeper. Each stroke made Lin Yan's words catch in his throat. His cursing became drawn out and weaker. He panted hard, clutching the man's hair carelessly; it was as smooth as silk.

He came into the ghost's mouth.

There was a swallowing sound in the darkness.

In these absurd nights and absurd affairs, Lin Yan remembered releasing himself four times in "his" mouth and hands, until his waist became weak and his throat was hoarse to the point he couldn’t swear anymore. Finally, he sat on the lap of the invisible "person" and sobbed into its shoulder.

He felt anger, hatred, fear, humiliation, disgust, but, most of all, powerlessness.

"What the hell are you?!"

"What do you want?"

"I haven't done anything to provoke you," Lin Yan said weakly.

"I will help you make peace with your death, burn some paper money during Qingming, and take the memorial tablet home with me to worship."

"Let me go."

Without answering, the ghost put Lin Yan on the sofa. No matter how much Lin Yan talked into the dark, it would not respond anymore. Instead, it silently disappeared again.

Lin Yan didn't dare to close his eyes at all. He rummaged through some boxes and found the amulet he bought during the trip and the rosary beads sent by his relatives when he moved. He placed a knife in his hand and tucked it under his pillow. The knife was charmed, meant to ward off and suppress evil spirits. After gathering everything together, Lin Yan turned on anything that emitted light in the house, and sat in front of the computer to search for information related to exorcism. The sound of typing on the keyboard sounded particularly harsh at night. Lin Yan's eyes were glued to the screen, but his ears kept paying attention for any movement behind his back. The tension in his back made him want to curl up under his blanket. Supported by unbelievable perseverance, he was entangled in such unholy things, and he had to do something before he was slaughtered.

The mantra of rebirth was chanted over and over through the speakers, and the whole room was filled with peaceful Sanskrit sounds.

"namo amitābhāya tathāgatāya

tadyathā

amṛtod-bhave

amṛta-siddhaṃ bhave

amṛta-vikrānte

amṛta-vikrānta

gāmine gagana

kīrta-kare svāhā"*

*This is the Amitabha Pure Land Rebirth Mantra that Lin Yan is playing and I absolutely could not find a single translation besides the original Sanskrit version or the one in Chinese and I'm not about to butcher a Buddhist mantra.

If you recite it 200,000 times, you can produce the buds of wisdom. If you recite it 300,000 times, you can see Amitabha. You can get everything you want in this world without being deceived by evil ghosts and spirits. Lin Yan thought, maybe he should be a dojo to overthrow this vain ghost, but it was so hostile that no place would necessarily accept him.

[crimefightingspiderguy]

a new recruit

Part I to the series, i want you to want me. 

Summary: Peter, May and (Y/N) get an unexpected surprise. 

Warnings: I guess swearing? Maybe spoilers for Captain America: Civil War, but like who hasn’t seen that bad boy lol? 

Pairings: Peter Parker x best friend!reader 

Word count: 2,491

A/N: This is my first series for Peter Parker so come along on this new adventure with me lol. I’m going to be doing something similar to my best friend to the throne series, but with the Spider-Man universe, and throwing some fun surprises in it hopefully. 

“So, I was thinking, for the Spanish project we could make a cultural food to do a sort of “bring the culture to life” aspect. Plus if the rest of our project totally bombs, maybe we can win the teacher over with sweet desserts, I heard he has a bit of a sweet tooth.” You sent a grin over to Peter, who reciprocated. 

“Sounds like a plan to me, but you might have to help me bake because I don’t think May would care for me burning our kitchen down again.” He chuckled, and as you were about to say a clever roast, something caught your eye. You and Peter had been walking back to his apartment so he could ask May permission to stay the weekend at your place and get some clothes if he could. You stop in your tracks, a confused look on your face. Peter turns and looks at you concerned.

“Who’s car is that?” You sped up to get closer and look at the fanciest car you’d ever seen in person. “Holy shit… I think this is Tony Starks!” You grin at it, reading the STARK license plate.

“What? No! What would Tony Stark be doing in Queens, and in my apartment building for that matter?” Peter came to stand next to you to see the plate, and his jaw dropped a little.

“Let’s go in and see if we bump into him!” You push him excitedly, “What if we got to meet THE Iron Man! How cool!”

You were practically bouncing on your toes as you waited in the elevator, you had no luck seeing him on the ground floor, but maybe there was still a chance. You and Peter got off when the doors opened, and to your dismay, Tony was nowhere to be seen. 

“(Y/N), I really don’t think Tony Stark would just be wandering around our apartment building. It might just be a super fan or something, or maybe he’s taking a stroll” Peter gave you a teasing look, and you punched his arm.

“Fine but if we see the news later saying that Tony Stark was going around giving out wads of cash to random civilians, you’ll be biting your tongue.” You joke, realizing that Peter’s probably right and there’s no real reason for the Tony Stark to be in Queens, especially in this building. Peter smirked at you as he unlocked his front door and walked in, heading towards the kitchen table to set his stuff down.

“Hey, Aunt May! There’s this crazy car parked out front!” Peter said, back turned as he set his backpack down.

“Peter…” You stare at THE Tony Stark sitting on Peter’s couch across from May, you smack his arm repeatedly until he finally turns around to see what you want.

“Gosh (Y/N), what’s…” Peter saw him and paused.

“Oh, Mr. Parker,” Tony said, smirking as if he had an inside joke going with everyone else in the room. 

 “Hey! What’re you… Um... I’m-I’m Peter. This is (Y/N).” Peter said, pointing at you, who still had your hand on his shoulder, not really being able to move. You softly smiled and brought yourself together, and slightly and awkwardly waved at him.

“Tony.” He pointed at himself. 

“Wh-What are you doing here?” Peter stumbled to ask.

“It’s about time we met,” Tony said like it was obvious why he was casually sitting with May and eating cookies. “You’ve been getting my emails right?” 

May gave Peter a shocked and confused look, a look that says why didn’t you tell me. Tony gave Peter a look that said, play along man. You didn’t fail to notice either, and suddenly all eyes were on Peter as you looked at him suspiciously. Surely Peter, your best friend of 15 years would have mentioned to you if he had been emailing THE Tony Stark. Wouldn’t he?

“Yeah, yeah. Right. Regarding the…”

“You didn’t even tell me about the grant.” May jumped in.

“Yeah about the grant.” Peter played along but was clearly just as lost as you were. 

“The September Foundation” Tony jumped in. You racked your brain, trying to remember if Peter ever mentioned anything about a grant, but nothing came up. “Remember when you applied.”

“Yeah…” You could read Peter like an open book, and you knew as soon as he put his hands in his front pockets and leaned on his tip-toes, that he was lying. 

“Well, I approved. So now, we’re in business.” Tony shot him yet another look that told him to play along, as May got excited. 

“But you didn’t tell me anything? What’s up with that?” She questioned Peter.

“Yeah Peter, what’s with the secrets?” You asked, and he looked between you and May, at a loss for words.

“Well, I just… I wasn’t sure if I’d get it. Thought I’d keep it a surprise if I did.” Peter pulled out of know where and shot you a look that told you he honestly had no idea what was going on either. “Anyway, what did I apply for?” 

“That’s what I’m here to hash out,” Tony said, finally explaining why he was here. “It’s so hard for me to believe that she’s somebody’s aunt,” Tony said, making aunt May blush.

“Yeah, well we come in all shapes and sizes, ya know.” You snorted at this, but quickly tried to cover it as a sneeze, Peter shot you a grin. 

“These walnut date cookies are exceptional,” Tony said, going back to flattering May. 

“Let me just stop you there.” Peter joined back in. “Does this grant got like money involved or whatever? No?” 

“Yeah, it’s pretty well funded,” Tony said. 

“Wow”.

“Well, look who you’re talking to,” Tony smirked, and you could see the excitement on Peter’s face. Even if Tony had the wrong kid, you knew Peter wouldn’t pass up the chance to get a grant for school, or even to work under a genius like Tony. “Can I get five minutes with him?” Tony asks May. 

“Sure.” She smiles at him. Tony gets up and has Peter show him to his room.

“This is so crazy!” You whisper yell to May as soon as you hear the lock turn to Peter’s room. 

“I know! I really hope everything works out for him. A grant from Mr. Stark would probably be enough to set him up for college.” She grinned at you then at the door where she just saw Tony with Peter. 

“It’s kind of weird that he didn’t tell either of us though, right?” You have known May your entire life. Honestly, you hadn’t had any siblings so when Peter moved in with May and Ben, and you remained close with him, she became more of an older sister to you. Peter’s parents had died when he was young, but May had been around enough that she had met you at some birthday parties and play dates, and she made it a priority to keep you and Peter together so he had some constant in his life in a time of chaos and change. You had grown up with Peter and had May to thank for that. Your parents had been close with Peter’s and when they died, May reached out to your parents and made sure they exchanged information at the funeral, agreeing Peter needed someone to make him feel normal in such a strange time. That was you, and the two of you had been inseparable since. You shared everything with each other. You were each other’s rocks and were together through thick and thin. When your mom had died you were about 10, it happened a couple years before uncle Ben had died, so he had helped your father through the transition. Peter helped you, and aunt May took you under your wing, helping you grow in ways that you need a mother for. She helped you with your first period, with puberty, she took you bra shopping, she helped you with all the things you felt too awkward to bring to your dad who had been left just as clueless as you.

“I would’ve at least have expected you to know. He tells you everything.” May said, holding up the cookie plate to you offering you one. You took one and bit it, immediately spitting it into your hand. 

“No offense May, but… this is raw.” You chuckled as May realized that Tony was being polite as she broke a cookie in half, as it crumbled to pieces. She shook her head and smirked at you, placing the cookies in the trash bin. 

“So how was school?” She asked you as she washed off the plate and put it on their dish drying rack. 

“It was okay. Got a B+ on my chemistry quiz, not my best work, but that damn kid in front of me wouldn’t stop clicking his pen.” You shook your head angrily thinking of that day. “Oh, sorry that I didn’t ask before coming over, by the way. Peter and I have a Spanish project together and he was supposed to be asking you permission to stay the weekend at mine.” 

“(Y/N), you know you don’t have to ask to come over, and Peter doesn’t need my approval to go over to your house. I trust you guys not to get yourselves killed.” She chuckled, drying her hands on a towel, and leaning back on the stove.

“See that’s just foolish on your part.” You pointed at her accusingly. She threw the towel at you, and as it hit you in the head you acted like it was a rock or something, holding where it hit and groaning. You fell to the ground “I’ve been hit!!” You gasp dramatically. 

“Oh get up solider, it was a flesh wound at most.” May shook her head chuckling at you. 

Tony walks out then and nods at May, “It was a pleasure.” He turns back to face Peter in the doorway and points at him, “I’ll be in touch.” He heads towards the door, stopping when he sees you lying on the ground. “(Y/N).” He nods his head, with a confused look. You quickly scramble up and smile at him. When he shuts the door behind him, you and May turn to look at Peter expectantly. 

“(Y/N), can you come here.” 

“Oh come on Peter, you can tell us both…” You point between you and May.

“Now.” Peter’s voice was solid. Unwavering. More intense than you’d ever heard it. You look between him and May but don’t question him, because clearly, something is wrong.

Peter quickly shuts and locks the door behind you as you scramble into his room. You sit on his bed, waiting for him to tell you what’s going on. He paces back and forth, tossing stuff into a duffle bag quickly.

“If you’re worried about aunt May letting you stay the weekend at mine, she already said she doesn’t care.” 

“Good, because I’m not going to your house, but I need her to believe I am.” This caught you off guard.

“What do you mean you’re not coming over? We have our project to work on.” 

“I’m going with Mr. Stark somewhere.”

“Where?”

“I can’t tell you. But I need you to trust me and lie to Aunt May.” You got up and grabbed Peter by his shoulders, stopping him in his tracks. 

“No. You tell me what’s going on right now Peter Parker, or I won’t tell May shit.” 

“I can’t, it’s too dangerous.” Peter pushed past you and kept grabbing clothes and shoes. 

“Bullshit.” Peter stopped, straightened up, and looked at you seriously.

“Please (Y/N), don’t make me tell you.” 

“If it’s too dangerous for me to even know, then it’s definitely too dangerous for you to go and do.” 

“Just, trust me, please.” 

“Peter, I couldn’t trust you more, but the thing is, in order for me to trust you I have to know what the hell is going on.” 

“I’m Spider-Man.” You laugh, maybe a little too loud.

“This is serious Peter. Are you in trouble or something?” 

“I’m being serious. I’m Spider-Man” He pulled his suit out and showed you. “I’m going with Mr. Stark to Germany to stop Captain America from breaking some law.” 

“You’re going to Germany!?” You whisper shout. “To fight THE Captain America?!” 

“And I’m Spider-Man.” Peter nodded, amused at your reaction being greater to everything besides him being a superhero. 

“Yeah, that too!” You chuckle. “I knew you were being weird recently. Ditching our weekly movie nights more than you ever have in our entire lives.” 

“I can catch you up on everything when I get back, but Mr. Stark is waiting for me right now in his car. So will you help me?” You mull it over. 

“Yes,” you nod hesitantly, “but I want you texting me updates every chance you get! I don’t wanna tell May we’re fine baking Spanish treats and two days later your shipped home in a coffin from Germany.” Peter gulps at the thought. You pull him in for the tightest hug you think you’ve ever given him. “Please be safe. I can’t lose you.” You whisper into his shoulder. 

“I’ll be back before you can even say, “what an idiot that Peter Parker” in Spanish.” He chuckled and rubbed your back.

You pulled away and rolled your eyes at him, “Well if that’s what we’re basing our time frame on, take your time. I won’t be getting that phrase down for at least a month.” You leaned in and did something you’ve never done before, kissed him on the cheek. “Good luck, and go for the legs on Cap, his shield doesn’t cover that region.” Peter held his cheek and smiled,

“Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.” 

“Hey May, we really gotta get going on that Spanish project,” Peter says as he leaves his room and heads over to her to kiss her cheek goodbye. “I’ll tell you all about everything Tony said when we finalize the details when his people email me this weekend. He didn’t tell me much other than that.” She nodded her head, looking a little flustered at how quickly he was heading towards the door. You knew it would be suspicious if you didn’t say goodbye, so before you left with Peter you gave May a quick hug and then caught up with Peter. 

“Okay, so I just go home and work on the project as normal, then I’ll send you some pictures to send to May so it looks believable that you’re there. Remember, update me every minute you’re not kicking ass.” 

“I will. I owe you big!” Peter said as he got into Tony’s car and drove off.

“Yeah, you do.” You smiled and shook your head, heading towards the train station. 

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged throughout the series. I hope you enjoyed!

Find more of my work here. 

My work is exclusively posted on Tumblr by me, on this blog. If you see my work posted elsewhere, please reach out to me.

Thank you, xx.

[lovelyirony]

roommates au for ironhawk (tony/clint) if u like them thank u

Clint Barton swore to himself. He didn’t actually think that they’d stick him with Stark as a roommate for the training course. 

It wasn’t that he disliked him. It’s just that…well. Tony Stark wasn’t really known for his skill. 

He was known for being a rule-breaker. A serial party guy. And someone who didn’t exactly fit SHIELD standards. 

There was the common theory that daddy bought him in. Wanted his son to have the distinctive bragging rights that SHIELD training gave. 

Higher-ups had already told Tony that he was not to receive special treatment. 

“If I wanted any I would’ve talked to the US military recruitment officers,” Tony snarks back.

Clint nods at that. At least he knows he won’t be getting any preferential treatment. 

But knowing and experiencing are two very different things. 

Clint also doesn’t want to get into trouble. He was already a bit of an oddball; they had brought him in from a failing circus where he was hailed as the best marksman in all of North America. (And if he really wanted to brag, probably in most of Europe as well.) 

Most everyone else has been in training since they were young. Or they know the right people. 

Both he and Stark are alienated a bit. 

Tony, quite frankly, doesn’t give a singular shit about how many people steal what meager dessert he gets from the cafeteria. 

“Yeah, yeah, go take my pudding cup and fuck right off,” Tony says to Rumlow. “I’m sure that your CO will simply love the extra sweets you’re gonna put into yourself right before we run.” 

Tony gets pudding thrown into his hair. A couple of flicks land on Clint’s shirt. 

“Barton, why hang out with the rich kid? Hoping he pays your way in?” Rumlow sneers. 

Clint would like people to pay for many things. But he doesn’t ask and he doesn’t hope because he likes earning his own shit, and most of all this position in SHIELD. 

He earns a trip to the office of Director Fury when he lands a clean upper-cut to Rumlow’s jaw. The guy cries. Clint scoffs. 

“He’ll pay for your funeral when we kill you at the obstacle course,” Clint says. “Tony, let’s get going.” 

Tony looks impressed to say the least. 

“Well damn, Barton. I didn’t even think you tolerated me.” 

“I’ve tolerated worse.” 

“I don’t know whether to like that or know that I could have the potential to be terrible.” 

“Let’s get going. I’ll hang back just in case I get called.” 

“You will. Might as well walk to Hill’s office now. I’ll steal you an extra dinner roll.” 

“Thanks, man.” 

Clint is early for one thing in his life, and it is this meeting with Fury. 

Fury looks at him over one eye, a black eye-patch on the other one. That is new. Very new. 

“What happened to your eye?” 

“I trusted somebody.” 

“Hill finally get you?” 

Fury doesn’t laugh. Clint does. It’s habitual, part of being nervous. 

“I understand that you punched Rumlow in the face?” 

“Yes sir. Couldn’t control my temper.” 

“Rumlow shouldn’t have been a little shit,” Fury says, snorting. “Don’t tell him that. He’s Pierce’s problem, thank god. Tell them I whooped your ass. Because I did. But I don’t give a shit what goes on so long as you get away with it.” 

Fury will come to regret these words in many instances, including one about four years later when Tony steals a coffee machine during a mission. But that’s ofur years from now. 

Clint gets back to training. Says he got roasted within an inch of his life. 

“You’re a shit liar,” Tony says. 

“Dude has an eye-patch now. Said it’s because he trusted somebody.” 

“Fury doesn’t even trust Girl Scout cookies, there’s no way he trusts an actual living human,” Tony says. “We have to find out.” 

Tony and Clint bond over two things: 

1.) They both feel terribly out of sync with everyone else because they are funny and also are not used to anything due to life experiences. 

2.) They are underestimated. 

Everyone thinks Clint has no fucking clue what’s going on. He’s spacey, most often forgets anything in the morning but coffee, and turned in one of their practice reports in green ink. Maria Hill nearly had an aneurysm. 

Tony is the rich kid who everyone thinks bought his way in and has only passed due to Benjamins or higher. 

Tony has not, because his dad actually hates that he’s in training and his mother thinks that he’s at an elite boarding school that Howard chose. They also happen to think that due to media presence, that is who he is. 

They can use their skills to advantage. Clint sees more than what people want and Tony knows more than what people want. 

They pair up for a mission. The objective is to rescue a hostage in under twenty minutes. 

The pairing before them has Rumlow, who is incredibly smug about how he incapacitated the attackers with brute force and rescued the hostage in ten minutes. 

“Beat that,” Rumlow says. 

“What’s the money?” Clint asks. 

“Two hundred bucks,” Rumlow says. “Lookin’ to take a girl out on a nice date.” 

“Hope you tell her you might have to cancel,” Tony says. 

-

They finish in four minutes. 

Tony disarms security in one minute, Clint paintballs the attack team in a matter of moments, and the hardest part is untying the agent acting as the hostage. 

Clint tosses the rope to Rumlow. 

“Tell your date you’ve gotten tied up at the moment and to take a rain check. You also owe us a hundred each. We’re nice like that.” 

- 

When it comes to partnering, Clint has to deny the opportunity to team up with Tony. 

“And why would that be? You both get along reasonably well,” Maria says. “Hell, you still beat records that were set decades back.” 

“Well usually SHIELD doesn’t like relationships to be part of partnership,” Clint says. “And to use the worst term possible, I’m banging Tony like a goddamn screendoor.” 

“I detest you every single day,” Maria says. “But noted. Tell Phil that I owe him fifty when you go out, okay?” 

Clint laughs. 

“Will do, Maria.” 

“Don’t call me that.” 

- 

Clint slinks back into their apartment, dropping keys in the bowl on the counter and leaning over the couch to give his boyfriend a kiss. 

“How much money did Phil owe?” 

“Fifty. We got him good. Also, Fury said no to the possibility of a cat scratch. I think there’s more to that, though.” 

“He’s lying,” Tony says. “I bet if we found an agent he worked with then we could probably figure out the truth.” 

“Phil and Maria both won’t tell us, we’re screwed,” Clint says with a sigh. 

“Then we’ll just have to try Danvers,” Tony says, teasing. 

He pulls his boyfriend over the couch. 

“Ugh, I was gonna get coffee.” 

“Not your fucking death wish type caffeinated shit,” Tony says. “You already had a morning cup. I refuse it. I’ll make you tea.” 

“Tea tastes disgusting.” 

“Hush, the only tea you ever had was when we stayed at that shitty motel.”

“Still. Don’t like it. It’s like they forgot to flavor hot water for a moment.” 

“I’m going to kick your ass and make you love herbal tea.” 

(Tony succeeds in this.) 

- 

No one actually knows of Tony’s history in SHIELD. Or that he’s dating Hawkeye. He usually works in the offices or on updating the computers, which SHIELD always needs. 

Natasha blinks after a mission that went on for a month. She sees the ever-elusive tech, who embraces Clint in a hug. Clint takes it one step farther and dips Tony into a kiss. 

“You’re so dramatic,” Tony grumbles. “By the way, your asshole dog misses you.” 

“Lucky?! Aw, I knew you kept him,” Clint teases. 

“He ate your pizza. I got him dog food and chipped. He’s as much a disaster as you are.” 

“I…did not see this coming,” Natasha says. 

“Heh, maybe I can surprise you,” Clint says, smiling. “Nat, this is Tony. My boyfriend. Also the best employee here.” 

“Even better than Phil?” 

“Who do you think enables his caffeine addiction?” Tony asks. “And who can get you good soup and catering?” 

“I will do literally whatever you want if you can get me good food,” Natasha says. “Or good coffee.” 

“I’ll set something up for next week,” Tony says. “For now, I’m dragging my man home and not letting him leave for the entire weekend.” 

“Now that I’m not opposed to,” Clint says, tugging on his shirt. “Bye Nat!” 

There’s a maniacal cackle as Clint tickles Tony, who responds in kind by signing “fuck you” at Clint. 

[miumiu-chan]

Miyase Go STORY 1 Chapter 12-2

Subbed video: STORY-1 12-2

-Kujo House / Front Gate-

[MIYASE]: “Welcome, thank you for coming, Rei-san.”

[REI]: “Thank you for inviting me.”

[REI]: “......Is your leg injury already fine?”

[MIYASE]: “Yes. Because it really was just a scratch.”

I heard that the wound was about 10 cm deep and that it had to be stitched up.

[REI]: (That’s not just a scratch in my mind......)

Right now, Miyase-san who smiled gently in front of me, no longer had that lingering unfamiliarity from in that warehouse.

[REI]: “If the recovery is going well, then I’m really glad.”

[MIYASE]: “Thank you for your concern.”

[MIYASE]: “Rei-san as well, is your health really okay?”

[REI]: “Yes. Thank you for calling.”

[MIYASE]: “I am sorry I contacted you so many times.”

[MIYASE]: “If there were a change in your health, I thought I could know something from your voice.”

[REI]: “You were worried, weren’t you.”

[MIYASE]: “Even Rei-san worried about me, too.”

[REI]: (He’s so kind......)

It was totally different from when we played Hanafuda.

[REI]: (But I know that Miyase-san’s not exactly the same as himself before that.)

[MIYASE]: “Rei-san......?”

[REI]: “Ah, I’m sorry, I spaced out.”

[REI]: “Um this, it’s refreshments.”

[MIYASE]: “Aa, you didn't have to worry about doing that.”

[MIYASE]: “It looks like very delicious shochu*. Thank you, let’s have it with everyone.” (T/N: a Japanese alcoholic drink)

[MIYASE]: “Now, please go ahead inside.”

-Kujo House / Garden-

The barbecue was already ready in the Kujo House’s garden.

[KIRISHIMA]: “Suuup Rei! I’ve already gone and started drinking first.”

[KANAME]: “Onee-san in a suit looks kind of fresh.”

[SHINDO]: “I miss the times when you wore the strange apron that matched with Miyase.”

[REI]: “This is like the original uniform for me.”

[REI]: “I am really sorry for deceiving everyone.”

The words of apology were made in a much calmer atmosphere than I expected.

[KUJO]: “We didn't call you today in order to get an apology.”

[MIYASE]: “That’s right, Rei-san. ——Here.”

I was handed a glass of champagne.

[MIYASE]: “First, let’s have fun and have a toast.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Right. We finally have the chance to have fun together again. So don’t make that face.”

[KANAME]: “Koya-kun was making noise at lunch today because he wasn't used to Onee-san’s share not being there.”

[MIYASE]: “These past two weeks, I would sometimes cook Rei-san’s share as well.”

[SHINDO]: “Well, that’s just how much we got used to Izumi in the Kujo Family.”

[KUJO]: “No one thinks they were deceived by you.”

[REI]: “Everyone......”

Choices:

Thank you. (♡)

I thought you would surely be angry.

Thank goodness.

[REI]: “Thank you for saying it that way.”

[MIYASE]: “They are true relationships created by Rei-san's personality.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Alright, then I’ll take the lead.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Everyone, lift your glasses up high.”

The illuminated flowers in the garden were reflected in the glasses that were raised from Kirishima-san's words.

[REI]: (Wah, how pretty......)

[KIRISHIMA]: “First of all, sorry you got caught up in the Kujo Family’s mess, Rei! And also”

[KIRISHIMA]: “——Miyase.”

[MIYASE]: “Eh......”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Welcome back.”

[MIYASE]: “!”

[KUJO]: “Welcome back, Go.”

[MIYASE]: “Nh......”

I was now witnessing the power of the words “welcome back”.

Telling where you are that you are here.

Warmly welcoming and smiling.

Reconnecting the essence that you are a “family”.

“Welcome back” were words that could do that.

[KIRISHIMA]: “And with that, cheeers!”

[SHINDO]: “Wait a minute.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Ah?”

[SHINDO]: “Aside from Miyase's case, how about also toasting to apologize to Izumi?”

[KANAME]: “He wouldn’t have given mind to that. Since it’s Koya-kun.”

[REI]: “In the first place, there’s nothing for you to apologize to me for.”

The champagne swayed in the glass.

[REI]: “Let’s have fun and toast.”

[SHINDO]: “Well, if the said person says so, there‘s no problem.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “C’mon, cheers.”

[KANAME]: “Cheers.”

[MIYASE]: “......Cheers.”

[KUJO]: “Cheers.”

...——And then, in the calm atmosphere, about an hour passed in no time.

Where drinking had become the main thing rather than eating, Miyase-san spoke——

[MIYASE]: “It’s about time, please allow me to have a family meeting.”

That was how he started telling the story of this series of uproars.

[KANAME]: “———Then, do you mean that the first person who came into contact with Go-san was Kagetsugumi?”

[MIYASE]: “That was how it was.”

[MIYASE]: ““Can’t the Kujo Family fall into the crime of the embezzlement of flower drugs?”——I was approached with that.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Seriously......They’re really nasty guys.”

[SHINDO]: “Well, they are yakuza, after all.”

[MIYASE]: “At first, I was going to cooperate with those yakuza”

[MIYASE]: “However, at the same time, there was contact from an acquaintance that belonged to the Chinese mafia “Licorice”——“

[MIYASE]: “I changed my mind that what I really should do was to protect the Kujo Family and crush Kagetsu.”

[MIYASE]: “That's why I joined hands with Licorice.”

[REI]: (Miyase-san......)

In my presence too, just what and how much would he speak about it?

The calmness as DCD and as Izumi Rei, I felt the instability of Miyase-san's conflict at the same time.

[KIRISHIMA]: “Or like, I want to make it clear here.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Why did Kagetsu come in contact with Miyase?”

[MIYASE]: “I......”

[MIYASE]: “No, I*” (T/N: used boku first but switches to ore from now on)

[MIYASE]: “Knowing that I had a grudge against the Kujo Family, they probably decided that I could be an internal spy.”

[KIRISHIMA & KANAME]: “............”

[MIYASE]: “But as I said earlier, I had the wrong target for my resentment.”

[MIYASE]: “——Kujo-san.”

[KUJO]: “......Aa.”

[MIYASE]: “Kujo-san......has always accepted that resentment for my sake, haven’t you.”

[KUJO]: “......”

When Kujo put down the glass he was holding, he caught Miyase-san's gaze directly.

[KUJO]: “I......couldn't say anything to Go.”

[KUJO]: “Even now, it’s still the same. I am just a coward.”

[MIYASE]: “............”

[KIRISHIMA]: “I don’t really get it, but......”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Basically, Miyase doesn't have a grudge against Kujo-san now, right?”

[MIYASE]: “Yes. I don't have a grudge against Kujo-san.”

[MIYASE]: “Rather, Kujo-san......has always been protecting me.”

[MIYASE]: “For years, I grew up fostering revenge without knowing that truth.”

[MIYASE]: “In order to atone for that crime, I wanted to crush Kagetsu this time without troubling Kujo-san's hands.”

[KUJO]: “............”

[MIYASE]: “But, in the end, it didn't go as planned.”

[MIYASE]: “And also, I've been telling everyone various lies.”

[KANAME]: “............”

[MIYASE]: “Kaname-kun, if you have any concerns, don't hesitate to ask me anything.”

[KANAME]: “Go-san......”

[MIYASE]: “I have treated everyone with very dishonest feelings until now.”

[MIYASE]: “But today, I want to answer honestly with everything I'm asked.”

Kaname-kun turned his gaze down once, as if lost on whether to say it or not.

Then, when he looked at Miyase-san again, in his eyes, 

There was a light that said “I believe you” even before he answered.

[KANAME]: “What‘s on my mind is”

[KANAME]: “Go-san’s......what happened at the funeral with Go-san’s mother?”

[KANAME]: “When I heard that Go-san took Onee-san and disappeared with her, I thought you were bad, but I investigated it.”

[KANAME]: “The funeral of the Kujo Family’s predecessor, where it was said that Go-san reunited with your mother, was 12 years ago.”

[KANAME]: “——It wasn’t 3 years ago.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Ah! When I was sleeping and they went out on their own!”

[SHINDO]: “It was when you caught a cold.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “I didn’t catch a cold! It was just a bit of a fever.”

[SHINDO]: “——Izumi.”

[REI]: “Eh-, yes......?”

[SHINDO]: “How would you diagnose a 38 degrees fever and a sore throat, as well as joint pains and nasal inflammation symptoms as a pharmacist?”

[REI]: “......It’s a cold.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “I said it wasn’t a cold!”

[KANAME]: “Hey, we’ve gotten a little off the main subject here.”

[MIYASE]: “At the funeral of the former head of the Kujo Family, the exchange with my mother was as I said.”

[MIYASE]: “My confused mother told me, “I don't want to see you again.””

[REI]: (-......Such a thing......)

[KANAME]: “——“

[MIYASE]: “But, the time when it happened was a lie. I’m sorry.”

[MIYASE]: “Three years ago, what Kujo-san and I attended——“

[KUJO]: “It was the funeral of a woman named Koda, a housekeeper who had taken care of me and Go a long time ago.”

[KANAME]: “Housekeeper......”

[SHINDO]: “I see.”

[SHINDO]: “There was actually a funeral. That's why you went out wearing mourning clothes.”

[MIYASE]: “Yes. Also, the story of being taken in to Kujo-san’s house, there are lies in some parts.”

[MIYASE]: “To the people who followed Kujo-san and gathered at this house......To you”

[MIYASE]: “I couldn't speak honestly about my ugly life.”

[MIYASE]: “......I still had a deep grudge against Kujo-san at that time.”

[KANAME]: “Go-san......”

[MIYASE]: “I am truly sorry.”

Miyase-san, who bowed deeply, what he had been carrying on his back all this time——

[REI]: (Right now, I wish I could engrave this moment of his family watching over him.)

[KUJO]: “Go, raise your head.”

Kujo-san firmly touched Miyase-san’s shoulder.

[MIYASE]: “............”

[KIRISHIMA]: “That's right, Miyase.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “The meat you roast is a special kind of delicious! So smile.”

[SHINDO]: “What kind of reason is that......”

[SHINDO]: “But well, there is no reason to apologize.”

[MIYASE]: “Kirishima-san, Shindo-san......”

[SHINDO]: “If there's something to settle between you and Kujo, I don't really want to hear everything.”

[SHINDO]: “It seems like it’ll be a long topic that I’ll need to drink alcohol for.”

[KANAME]: “Sorry, Go-san.”

[KANAME]: “I asked about the truth of the exchange with your mother because I thought it would be better if it was a lie......”

[MIYASE]: “Kaname-kun......”

Aa, it’s warm, I thought.

Just a few words and a touch on your shoulder.

It was the kind of atmosphere as if embracing Miyase-san's life that he walked and wrapping it in warmth.

[MIYASE]: “I......regret my actions this time.”

[MIYASE]: “If I could have predicted Kagetsu's brutality and ignorance, it would have all been over without anyone getting hurt.”

[MIYASE]: “It was because I was careless and didn’t follow through to the end——“

[REI]: “Isn’t that because Miyase-san isn't a bad person......?”

[MIYASE]: “Eh......”

My thoughts naturally overflowed from my mouth.

I didn’t want Miyase-san to look back on the past anymore.

I didn’t want him to have a sad and painful face.

[REI]: “Miyase-san is different from the people in Kagetsu.”

[REI]: “You aren’t a bad person, so you couldn't completely predict what the bad guys would think.”

[REI]: “This time, I don’t deny the reality that Miyase-san’s actions created danger and commotion.”

[REI]: “But, as a result, one of the anti-social forces and dangerous drugs disappeared from Japan.”

[REI]: “That’s why, I......”

——“I”.

[REI]: “I want to think of the person named Miyase Go as someone who did his best for the justice of the Kujo Family.”

[MIYASE]: “Rei-san......”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Justice means that Miyase is also a hero together with Kujo-san.”

[MIYASE]: “Hero......Me?”

[SHINDO]: “I’ll join these clumsy conversations once in a while, why not.”

[SHINDO]: “Should we give a toast to these hero brothers?”

[MIYASE]: “Brothers......-“

[KUJO]: “Go, you are my family.”

[MIYASE]: “!”

[KUJO]: “My little brother——“

[KUJO]: “Isn’t it fine to say it already?”

[MIYASE]: “-............”

[MIYASE]: “............Soma-san.”

[KUJO]: “!”

[MIYASE]: “Thank you, Soma-san.”

[KUJO]: “Go......”

[KUJO]: “It’s been a long time. Since you called me that.”

[REI]: (I’m so glad......Truly.)

[KANAME]: “Sorry for raining on your parade but”

[KANAME]: “Since earlier, the pot that Go-san was watching, it’s been boiling quite a lot.”

[MIYASE]: “Ah! Oh no! The curry is going to burn.”

[KUJO]: “Curry......”

[KIRISHIMA]: “The yellow ranger hero!?”

[KANAME]: “Why are you suddenly mentioning rangers?”

[KIRISHIMA]: “Ha? What’s with that question?”

[KANAME]: “Eh......?”

[SHINDO]: “What is this generation that doesn’t even know the yellow ranger is a classic curry lover, do you even eat curry?”

[MIYASE]: “......Pft”

[ALL THREE]: “——!”

[MIYASE]: “Haha......ahaha-, sorry, it’s just somehow really funny.”

[REI]: “Miyase-san, sometimes your sense of humor is pretty strange, huh?”

[MIYASE]: “Haha, sorry. Let’s eat curry together, everyone.”

[REI]: “Please let me help with the serving.”

[MIYASE]: “Thank you, Rei-san.”

[KUJO]: “Go, are you going to prepare the sauce?”

[MIYASE]: “Eh......”

[REI]: “Ah, I want to use the sauce, too!”

[KANAME]: “Are you insane? In curry?”

[SHINDO]: “It’s heresy.”

[KIRISHIMA]: “For me, put the usual cheese and a barbecue-baked wiener, Miyase.”

[KANAME]: “......Fukujinzuke*, I’ll get it from the fridge.” (T/N: a condiment commonly used as relish for Japanese curry.)

[SHINDO]: “Is there fried egg?”

[MIYASE]: “Cheese, wieners, fukujinzuke and fried eggs are all properly prepared.”

[MIYASE]: “Of course, the sauce too.”

Somewhere next to Miyase-san, who smiled with a face that looked as if he was going to cry, I served everyone curry.

Miyase-san's mother's secret special curry.

Kujo-san and I poured the sauce on while Shindo-san and Kaname-kun looked at us with disdain.

[KUJO]: “......It’s delicious.”

[REI]: “Yes! It is really delicious, after all.”

[MIYASE]: “It’s so delicious that it makes you want to quickly ask for seconds, right?”

[MIYASE]: “It’s an important memory that my mother left behind.”

[MIYASE]: “I’m glad I was able to eat it with everyone.”

[bonjourmoncher]

Hamilton Lindley 

I'd like to introduce a man with a lot of charm, talent, and wit. Unfortunately, he couldn't be here tonight, so instead . . . - Melvin Helitzer I do not stand on protocol. If you just call me Excellency, it will be okay. - Hamilton P Lindley The number-one fear in life is public speaking, and the number-two fear is death. This means that if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than giving the eulogy. - Jerry Seinfeld

At the end of a long introduction: You omitted perhaps one thing - that in 1974 I had a hemorrhoidectomy. - Howell Heflin My father gave me these hints on speech making: Be sincere ... be brief ... be seated. - Hamilton Philip Lindley

If any of you are related to our main guest, let me know so I can speak slowly. - Wendy Morgan As my mother used to say: "Mimic a duck act calm and unruffled on the surface, but paddle like crazy underneath." - Anonymous Some people might say that I think too highly of you just because I worship the water you walk on. - Anonymous As Spinoza, or someone very much like him, once said . . . - Judith Viorst Speeches are like steer horns - a point here, a point there, and a lot of bull in between. - Evelyn Anderson My job is to talk to you, and your job is to listen. If you finish first, please let me know. - Harry Hershfield

I don't want to be patronizing . . . that means "talking down."

- Wendy Morgan

I have only ten minutes and hardly know where to begin. voice in back: Begin at the ninth. - Jacob Braude

After such an introduction, I can hardly wait to hear what I'm going to say. - Evelyn Anderson Add to Favorite ListI was chosen to speak due to my warm personality. . . . Look up warm and it means "not so hot." - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListA speech that's full of sparkling wit will keep its hearer grinning, provided its end is close to its beginning. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListIt usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain Add to Favorite ListI'd like to tell you some jokes now, but you'd only laugh. - Milton Berle Add to Favorite ListThe recipe for a good speech includes some shortening. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListI was told to be accurate, be brief, and then be seated. ... So I promise I shall be brief as possible - no matter how long it takes me. - Willard Pearson Add to Favorite ListThank you for the privilege of speaking to you in this magnificent auditorium. You know the meaning of the word auditorium, don't you? It is derived from two Latin words, audio, "to hear," and taurus, "the bull." - Larry Wilde Add to Favorite ListI was chosen to speak today based on my senility. - Wendy Morgan Add to Favorite ListA toastmaster is a man who eats a meal he doesn't want so he can get up and tell a lot of stories he doesn't remember to people who've already heard them. - George Jessel Add to Favorite ListI'm an idealist: I don't know where I'm going but I'm on my way. - Carl Sandburg Add to Favorite ListWe noticed a crasher at the bar - that shows what a real man he is - he's here to show he's not ticked for not being asked. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListResponse to clapping: "Thank you for ovating." - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListI often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation. - George Bernard Shaw Add to Favorite ListA bore is a man who spends so much time talking about himself that you can't talk about yourself. - Melville Landon Add to Favorite ListBuffet: A French word that means "get up and get it yourself." - Ron Dentinger Add to Favorite ListWit is the salt of conversation, not the food. - William Hazlitt Add to Favorite ListGood breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person. - Mark Twain Add to Favorite ListOn how to become a good speaker: Practice all the time. One of the best ways is to put a bunch of marbles in your mouth while you talk. Slowly but surely you take away a marble. And then, when you've lost all your marbles, you're a public speaker. - George Jessel Add to Favorite ListOnce you get people laughing, they're listening and you can tell them almost anything. - Herb Gardner Add to Favorite ListGoldie Hawn is funny, sexy, beautiful, talented, intelligent, warm, and consistently sunny. Other than that, she doesn't impress me at all. - Neil Simon Add to Favorite ListWhen I told her we were going to roast her, she said, "Of course, . . . they only crucify the innocent." - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListA lot of you want me to hurry through the introduction. That's because you're so much older you don't want to waste a minute of your life. - Wendy Morgan Add to Favorite ListEven more exasperating than the guy who thinks he knows it all is the one who really does. - Al Bernstein Add to Favorite ListWe will then hear from the founder of the Mayo Clinic, . . . Dr. Ted Clinic. - Dave Barry Add to Favorite ListThe first Rotarian was the first man to call John the Baptist Jack. - H. L. Mencken Add to Favorite ListWill the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands? All the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry. - John Lennon Add to Favorite ListAs one skeleton said to the other - if I had any guts I'd get the heck out of here. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListThanks for the nice introduction. Next to my resume, that's the closest I'll ever come to perfection. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListWe were worried that our main speaker wouldn't be able to make it tonight. But, fortunately, due to a hole in the prosecution's case . . . - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListI thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, Why should I? He never reads any of mine. - Spike Milligan Add to Favorite ListI hope you will excuse my being late. The person in this organization who gave me directions here has obviously heard me speak before. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListWhen I was preparing for this speech I asked my family for advice. One member replied, "There's a first time for everything, so try to be funny and brief." - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListMost experts suggest that one should open with a joke. Obviously, they've never heard me tell a joke. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListGood evening, ladies and gentlemen. I'm pleased to be with you. (Pause) That concludes my prepared remarks. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListI'm moving down here . . . because some of you in the back might not be able to hear my talk . . . and that wouldn't be fair to those who can hear it. - Anonymous Add to Favorite ListIt has been discovered experimentally that you can draw laughter from an audience anywhere in the world, of any class or race, simply by walking on a stage and uttering the words "I am a married man." - Ted Kavanaugh Add to Favorite ListThis gathering is what I call "intimate," which really means "Where is everybody?" - Tim Conway

[the-quiet-winds]

BRITTNEY MACK WINKED AT ME (not clickbait)

or Six Chicago, July 9th, 2019

basically this will be an incoherent mess of me yelling about things i saw. so here we go.

for my west end fans: 

adrianna - aragon, andrea - boleyn, abby - seymour, brittney - cleves, courtney - howard, anna - parr.

the show itself:

- the intro to the show being various pop songs played on lute and harpsichord made my life honestly

- watching all the queens come out, backlit and smoke-screened, was amazing

- brittney winked at me during ex-wives. right at me. (more on this later)

- adrianna’s no way was so. good. at the end she paused and then started waving and blowing kisses into the crowd it was adorable.

- andrea taking a selfie was so fucking cute and then she just started jamming

- stacy mcmichael (the bassist) was going so hard the whole show i truly stan her

- when andrea sang “and the little one said...” she pointed at herself 

- andrea asked kimi (maggie) “what was i meant to do?” and she shrugged and then she asked stacy “what was i meant to do?” and stacy was kinda like ‘you’re on your own mate’

- her wearing yellow to a funeral was so on point and she was looking straight at everyone in our area

- if i could describe abby’s seymour, i would say a bumbling mum who doesn’t quite know what she’s doing

- when abby said she loved henry, courtney looked absolutely betrayed, and anna looked so confused.

- abby was definitely crying at the end of heart of stone. tears in her eyes, wiping at her cheeks, everything. 

- haus of holbein in real life is an acid trip and it was awesome

- the opera brittney does? in get down? it was so pure, so perfectly placed. thank you toby and lucy for giving us that.

- the guy she called up to dance was a man in a nice blue suit, and he went OFF. so much so that brittney had to tell him to stop and gave him a “dirty look”

- when courtney was roasting the other queen, she threw an arm around abby and played with the ends of her hair, and abby looked so lost. 

- courtney’s breakdown at the end of all you wanna do broke my damn heart. anna put a hand on her knee and she jumped clear off the stage.

- at the end, after the kiss-gasp, she just turned her head up and there was a single, dark pink spotlight on her. it was a chilling image.

- when everyone started making fun of parr, they formed a little circle in the middle of the stage and spoke in very mocking voices.

- after abby’s “when i wanted to hold my newborn son” tangent, brittney pulled her away, and abby did the mum thing (tm) where she wiped something off britt’s chin with her thumb.

- anna’s riffs should be illegal.

- i thought they broke something during the dialogue between i don’t need your love and the remix. i heard electronic crackling, probably a mic brushing a costume, and then they paused for a full minute before saying “guys, you think they got it?” and moving on to the remix.

- when they did the slow intro into six, anna sang “we’re one of a kind...” and looked right at courtney and offered her her hand, and courtney smiled, sang “no category,” and took her hand (it was hella soft)

- six was very cute and they were all hyping each other up

- i have a megasix and i will maybe upload it

stagedoor

- everyone stagedoored except abby

- i was right on the edge because i got shoved out of the way by some 10 year olds and i didn’t feel like doing anything about it, and i was still in the front

- mallory practically ran me over to get out and i would have been okay if she had

- courtney came out first, we had a short conversation and she started going back down the line

- adrianna! came out next, and made a beeline straight to me and said, i kid you not, “hey beautiful,” before signing my playbill and i nearly melted. she was so sweet.

- anna started making her way down the line, and my mom said really quietly from behind me “i loved her” and i was like “same.” she was very very kind.

- andrea is so short irl but still very fun. my mom and i both told her she was very funny

- then britt came out and basically came right to me. i said “you winked at me in the second row” and she said “i remember you! you were so smiley!” and yeah i almost died again. 

- i bought a shirt, the one with the silhouettes that just has the logo and i love it.

sorry this was so long but i had a lot of thoughts.

go see six!!!

[vesperione]

My hot take on Sycamore High;

For those who don’t know it is tradition that whenever @oh-theatre posts a new chapter of Sycamore High I roast it. So let’s turn the tables around.

-

Things you need to know beforehand. I heavily headcanon as Paul with anxiety/aspergers. But this “chapter” is gonna focus on Paul and Emma, featuring my boy ted 😎

-

Tw: talks of suicide, homophobia

Word count: 1,824

-

Emma had only tried to do the right thing. She knew Paul’s sister was having issues, she knew Paul wasn’t getting enough sleep, she knew paul had anxiety. They’d been partners a few times by now and the fact he’s confessed that he likes her, like more than a friend likes, to her said a lot. But he was sleep deprived. And Emma feared it could turn into something more.

-

After the funeral passed, Paul found it harder to stay strong. He soaw teds mom as his second mother and she was fucking gone. And he didn’t know what to do. Nothing could cheer him up. He just felt...numb. Numb. That was hardly the word to describe it, but it was easier calling it “numb” than anything else. It was one particular day where Paul had to audition for the musical. Everyone else in that class did but it was different for Paul. Musicals bought up a very bad memory. He’d tried to enjoy them again but couldn’t. But while he was on stage auditioning in front of everyone, another one of their classmates had decided to throw some...questionable comments at him. It made him seize up and stop. The music kept playing. But he didn’t sing. He didn’t speak. He stayed still. He heard laughs around him but they became muffled. He zoned out as his breathing became ragged. He went extremely tense. And that’s when he realised it. He was being mocked. Everything snapped and he ran off stage, knocking the microphone stand over, an all-too-loud hiss ringing throughout the classroom as Paul ran backstage. He’d joined the class to get his confidence back up. Now he was never coming back again. He grabbed his bag and ran out of the classroom. The halls were empty, still. The pristine condition of the school left glimmering. That was about to change. In his mind, the school became distorted. The floors became wooden planks that showed bubbles of lava underneath them. The walls became fire. Everything around him turned to soot, burning and bubbling orange flames. He was hallucinating and he knew it. He reached what appeared to be his locker and struggled to get it open. He had to lean against it for safety as he shut his eyes. He felt around inside for his glasses. When he found them, he put them on and everything was back to normal again. His breathing was heavy. His heart rate was too quick.

He had to leave.

The bell for the next class sounded and he was shaking again. Shaking to the extent everything felt like liquid. The wrong step and he could drown. So he began running. Running through the halls. And then there was a hand on his shoulder. He stopped running and focused. Alice.

“Hey.” She said softly. “Professor Hidgens told me what happened okay?” Paul nodded, listening to his sister. “Come on you’re not in the right mind to be running around school. Let me take you to the nurses office-“

“I wanna go home.” He said. “I can’t stay here Alice don’t make me stay here moms gonna kill me if she finds out-“

“Paul Paul hey.” She smiled. “It’s lunch in an hour. I’ll take you home then okay?”

“Okay....”

“For now, lets get you somewhere safe.” So Paul let his sister drag him through the halls. This would be the last time he saw this school. He wasn’t coming back. Hopefully. But for now it would be the last time. He sat down on the couch in the medical bay as Alice explained what happened. Luckily it was Paul’s favourite nurse on shift today and she and him got along. She worked on the other students there and left him alone. Alone. He wanted to be alone forever. He hated everyone in this moment. He’d made a fool out of himself.

—————————

Emma and their friendship group had all cheered Paul on jokingly as he went to audition on stage. She hadn’t been able to see him the same way since he’d confessed. And she was still worried about him. He was doing an excellent job when another classmate shouted it. A slur. Emma clenched her fists around the side of the chair and tensed up, staring at the guy and then Paul. Paul Who...had frozen in place and was shaking, his lip quivering. “Uh....oh...” she heard Ted say. And then it got too much. With a bang the microphone fell. Emma plugged her ears as she watched Paul run away and couldn’t do anything. She watched ted shoot up and run backstage. And for some reason, Emma felt her heart snap.

-

A week after and Paul hadn’t come into school. She’d tried to ask Alice about it, but Alice had always come up with some late excuse and avoided the conversation. It was at the table when Charlotte had tried to message Paul only to find out she was blocked. That upset her a lot. “Next week he’ll be back.” She said with a smile. But he wasn’t. And he didn’t come the week after. The next sighting of Paul anyone had seen was when ted went around a month after the incident. He sat down at the dinner table the next day shaking slightly. Emma looked up at ted and so did everyone else.

“He’s alive.” Ted said and everyone smiled and cheered. But ted didn’t. “He’s alive. But he’s not in a good state. His mom says he hasn’t moved since he got home last month. He either only sleeps or doesn’t sleep at all. I’ve never seen it affect him this badly before...”

“What affect him?” Emma asks. Ted shook his head.

“Not my time or place to say. He didn’t want anyone to know. Me and bill just guessed it” Emma stood up.

“I’m gonna go and see him.”

“No! Emma that’s a bad idea you can’t-“

“Why not? Nothings stopping me!”

“Emma just trust me!” Ted pleased. “Don’t. Go and see him.” He insisted. She sat back down and sighed.

“I just wanna know if he’ll ever be okay again.” Charlotte pulled Emma into a hug.

“We all do, em. We all do.”

——————

It was a shock when ted came to visit him, but out of his friends, he was thankful it was ted.

“Go away” he mumbled, unable to speak louder.

“Paul, bud, I’m worried. We all are. Where have you been?”

“Here.” He said. “Haven’t moved. What’s the point. I’m gonna stay here until I die. That’s what everyone wants.”

“No, Paul. It isn’t. We want you to stay alive!”

“Well I don’t.” The words slipped out effortlessly but he meant them. He felt the bed shift uncomfortably as Paul continued staring at the wall.

“Tell me you don’t mean it.”

“No im 100% sure. I say what I say and I mean it every time.” He heard ted sigh again. “Look, I’m sorry but I can’t stay! I don’t want a future!”

“Why not? You have so much to live for!”

“Like what?”

“Like me, like Bill, like Alice...like Emma-“

“Get out.” Even though he was still mumbling, Paul’s tone was ferocious.

“I-“

“Get out!” So broken, Ted left. When ted attempted to message Paul that evening, he found he was blocked too. Everyone in his friendship group was being blocked. This was happening and it was happening now.

———

“Paul?” Emma asked, her voice fragile over the phone. “Paul tell me you’re there.” Silence. “Paul please I need to know you okay-“

“Have I ever been okay.” A small smile formed on Emma’s face even though it shouldn’t. “I mean it’s not as if my other mother figure died and I had a homophobic slur thrown at me while I was trying to get my confidence back by doing something that embarrassed me the most.”

“Paul I-“

“Don’t say anything. Let it sink in. Now, are you frightened? Because I sure as hell aren’t.”

“Paul stop it!”

“You’ve said my name 4 times what’s wrong.”

“You! You’re what’s wrong I’m fucking worried!”

“Don’t be. I’ll die and everything will be fine-“

“Stop it!” She said tears in her eyes beginning to form. “Please I want you to get better. Alice won’t talk to me. I need to know if you’re ever gonna survive.”

“Probably not.”

“Please I need you I-I can’t let you die not when I know...things...”

“What....things.”

A beat. A sigh. “You said you loved me and I never thought my crush could ever love me back.”

“Oh. Well. In that case that changes everything.”

“Really?”

“No. I’m sorry but this is me now. We can’t be together. We can’t. Not when I’m on my way to death-“

“Stop.”

“Sorry but it’s true. Good bye, Emma. Hope to see you in heaven rather than hell.” And hung up. He’d blocked her after the call as well. Emma was their last chance to get Paul back. And he was gone. Or was he? Not letting tears fall, she ran out of her room and downstairs.

“I’m going out.” And out she went. Out to save her best friend, her crush, whoever Paul was to her at this point.

—————

A knock at the door. “Fuck off!” Paul shouted but the door opened anyways. He didn’t move from facing the wall. It’s all he ever did. Face the wall. His entire left side had gone numb. Numb. Just like him. Footsteps approached him. “Whoever you are leave.”

“No.” The voice spoke. “No im not leaving. I was told earlier today not to come here and I see why. But I’m here now and I can’t lose you.”

“You can and you will.” A slap to the face.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry!” Emma apologised as Paul lifted his hand to his cheek. “Oh my god Paul I-“

“Shut up, Emma.” He sighed. He rolled over, wincing to meet her watery eyes. “Why are you here.”

“For you. I can’t just let you die knowing what I know now.” She said as she took his hand gently. “Please Paul. I want to date you. So so badly. I want to help you get back on your feet. Please?” He looked up. God she was persuasive. He didn’t realise how much pain he’d caused until Emma was sitting by him holding his hand.

“I’m sorry.” He said, moving his eyes to look at the ceiling. Emma laughed slightly.

“Dumbass come here.” She said and pulled him into a light hug. “I’m gonna kick their asses. I’m gonna get Paul back. And then maybe we can go on a date?”

“Emma were pretty much already dating.” Emma looked like she was thrown back by what Paul said. He looked back at her. “I’m just saying what’s true.”

“Paul?”

“Yeah?”

“Promise me you’ll let me help you get better. You’ve missed so much I’ve been so worried-“

“Yes.”

[solei28]

Coffee, Pie, You-Chapter 11

Ok, so I know I’ve said a couple of times this fic was coming to an end, but it turns out I’m a liar. There will definitely be another chapter after this one. Also, there’s more I want these to explore so I think I’m just gonna keep adding to it until I get sick of them!! 

You had music blasted while you worked your magic. Even though you had never cooked in this kitchen before, you moved around expertly. You had all 6 ovens on cooking various parts of the meal you had put together a few days ago.

Avengers Thank You Dinner:

Appetizers:

Zucchini Pancakes

Bacon Wrapped Jalapeno Poppers

Fresh Bruschetta with Homemade Baguette

Sides:

Honey Glazed Carrots

Mixed Seafood Salad

Sauteed Broccoli  

Main Course:

Stuffed Pork Loin

Roasted Red and Sweet Potatoes

Baked 5 Cheese Mac and Cheese

Broiled Chicken Quarters

Dessert:

Cherry Pie

Blackberry Lavender Mini Loaf Cakes

Chocolate Raspberry Mousse

Drinks:

Fresh Strawberry Lemonade

Sangria

Blackberry and Sage Infused Water

You couldn’t wait to see their reactions when everything was finally done. When you had little downtime between dishes, you wrote down each dish on index cards you found in your apartment. You would put them by each plate or tray so they knew exactly what they were going to eat.

It was a quarter to 6 when everything was finally ready. You set out the appetizers on the table and told FRIDAY to gather the team. Buchanan and Steve were the first to arrive, of course.

You were placing the enormous bowl of mixed seafood salad on the table when you heard a low whistle.

“It smells amazing, doll,” Buchanan said, eyes widening as he looked at the table.

“I hope it tastes as good as it smells,” you told him hopefully. “Since you 2 are here you can help me bring out the rest of the food.”

Steve’s eyebrows went up. “There’s more?” The table was already packed with bowls and trays of food along with a half a dozen pitchers.

“Yeah. The main course, Cap.” You walked past them. “Come on.”

“Holy shit, that’s a lot of food,” Buchanan deadpanned.

You laughed handing him a large pan of mac and cheese. “Put this on the table, sweety.” You then turned and grabbed the pan with the chicken quarters and passed it to Steve. “This as well, please.”

Buchanan came back in. “Anything else?” You handed with 2 large bowls of potatoes. He took them and turned on his heel, heading back to the dining room.

“Look at this spread,” Clint said excitedly.

You came out of the kitchen with the pork loin. “Only the best for you lot.”

“Y/N, I think you may have gone overboard,” Nat said walking in.

You tilted your head and scrunch your nose. “You think so? I was going to make lasagna and stuffed mushrooms as well.”

“Ok, that definitely would've been overboard,” Nat nodded.

“Wow, Y/N!” Sam cheered walking into the room. “This looks amazing.”

“Ok, I was going to kick you for convincing FRIDAY to ban me from the floor, but this definitely puts you back in my good graces. So, I’ll allow it this time my dear,” Tony said sauntering in with an amused smirk.

You smiled brightly. “Good thing I’m a damn fine cook. Emphasize on the fine,” you joked winking at him. You looked around. “Where’s Bruce?”

“He’ll up in a minute,” Tony said inspecting all the food on the table.

“I’m here,” Bruce said coming in. He looked at the spread and back at you with an impressed look. “You made all this yourself, Y/N?”

You smiled toothly. “Yup!” You looked around at everyone. “Alright, everyone take a seat.”

Once everyone was seated, you walked over to the empty seat Buchanan had save for you. It was between him and Steve. You looked around the table again taking in a deep breath. You were a bit nervous but you knew you wanted to say a few words. Buchanan sensed this and grabbed your hand. You smiled down at him and felt a little more confident when he smiled back.

“You guys have done so much for me over the past couple weeks without really even knowing me. I can never truly express how grateful and thankful I am to you all. This is just a small token of my appreciation and I hope to make it up to all soon.”

You felt the heat behind your eyes but held back the tears. You were sincere and you did feel like there was so much more you should do for them. These people saved your life, protected you and gave you a place to stay and didn’t ask for anything in return.

Buchanan stood up and hugged you tightly. “Doll, this is more than you needed to do to thank us. We appreciate this more than you can know.” He kissed the top of your head.

“Bucky’s right, Y/N. This is more than enough,” Steve chimed in.

There was a chorus of agreements from around the table and you felt your heart swell. “Thank you,” you whispered.

“Ok, so are we over the sentimental crap so we can eat?” Tony inquired with mock impatience. “Also, Barnes and Noble are right. This is one hell of a thank you, dear.”

You sat down smiling. “Alright, let’s eat!”

There was no time wasted as they all piled food onto their plates. Buchanan’s plate was overflowing when he was finally ready to dig in. You noticed Steve’s plate was the same, as was Sam’s. Nat had a decent amount of food on her plate, Clint’s plate was somewhere in between Nat’s and Sam’s. Bruce and Tony were pretty stacked as well.

This was the moment you were waiting for. The moment they finally started eating. Their reactions left you feeling prideful and relieved. Buchanan and Steve moaned which caused you to giggle. Sam let out a “So good,” as he shoveled more food in his mouth. Clint looked at you nodding, pointing to the food then giving you a thumbs up. Bruce smiled in appreciation while Nat nodded at you in approval.  

Tony looked at you seriously. “Y/N, are you sure you don’t want to open your own restaurant?

You let out another giggle. “Nope. I open up the kiosk again once I figure out to get a new one. I couldn’t afford insurance, so it looks like I gotta start from scratch again.” You shrugged.

Tony nodded wheels in his head turning. “Well, if you ever  change your mind, let me know.”

Once the plates were empty, (yes, these savages cleared their packed plates.), you got up and started clearing the table. Buchanan gently grabbed your wrist and tugged a bit. You got what he was trying to do and sat back down.

“We’ll clean up. You have done enough, doll.” He leaned over and pecked your lips.

“I was just trying to make room for dessert,” you said sheepishly.

Clint jumped up. “Come on! Let’s get this table cleared, people. There’s dessert.”

Sam and Steve got up to help. The rest of you stood sitting down chatting about how good the food was and other nonsense. It took them about 7 minutes to clear everything away. Clint was really adamant about having dessert.

“Ok, all clear.” He looked at you expectantly.

You got up and looked at Buchanan. “I could use your help.”

He nodded getting up. “Sure thing, sweetheart.”

You walked into the kitchen and instantly felt Buchanan put his arms around your waist, pulling you to him. You wrapped your arms around his and leaned your head back into his massive chest. He’s so warm and when he pressed his lips to your temple you melted into his embrace.

“Thank you, doll. The food was amazing,” he spoke softly in your ear.

“I’m happy you all enjoyed it.” You turned in his arms to face him, putting your arm around his neck. You looked deep into his eyes. “I’m so thankful I met you. I wouldn’t be here right now if I hadn't. I’d probably still have my kiosk and apartment, though.” You laughed at the pout he gave you. Your face grew serious. “Thank you, Buchanan.”

He leaned his face forward and captured your lips in a passionate kiss. “I’m thankful to have you in my life, Y/N,” he breathed on your lips when he pulled away.

“Hey, where’s dessert?” Clint asked walking into the kitchen. “Listen. You guys can have sexy time later. Right now, is dessert time. I need some sweets.”

You shook your head. “Alright. Calm down, guy.” You walked over to where the pies, cakes, and mousse were. “Here, you can help. Takes the pies.” You handed Clint the 2 cherry pies you made.

Buchanan came over and picked up the 2 trays of the blackberry lavender mini loaf cakes. “These look interesting, doll. What are they?”

You told him what they were while you followed him out of the kitchen with the chocolate raspberry mousse. You were greeted by eager faces. Looks like Clint wasn’t the only one waiting.

“Enjoy, guys,” you said sitting down after placing the mousse down on the table.

Much like with the food, no time was wasted grabbing dessert. You were praised for how delicious everything was from full mouths around the table. When everyone was finally stuffed, Sam, Clint, and Steve offered to clean up.

You and Buchanan bid them goodnight and made your way to the elevator. You were holding hands waiting for the lift to get there. He looked down at you, concern in his eyes. He bit his lip and you watched him have a conversation in his head.

“What’s wrong, sweety?” you finally asked him.

He opened his mouth but was interrupted when the doors opened. After stepping on, did he speak. “I wanted to ask you something. I just don’t want to upset you, though.”

You gently stroked his cheek. “You could never upset me, Buchanan. You can ask me anything, anytime. OK?”

He nodded taking your hand in his and planting a kiss on the back of it. “How would you feel if I told you Steve and I decided to have a funeral service for Sandra?” He studied your face waiting for your response.

He wanted to talk to you about it earlier, but you kicked him out, so he didn’t get a chance. When Steve had approached him about it, he felt like it was the right thing to do. Now, however, he was having doubts. He needed to know how you felt about it. She did try to kill you after all. And, nearly succeeded.

A small smile tugged at your lips. You could see how much it bothered him and that he valued your opinion. “I think that’s great. We should honor the person she was before HYDRA got their hands on her. When will it be held?”

Buchanan let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Really?” The look of relief on his face made your heart flutter. “It’ll be this Friday at St. Raymonds. It starts at 10.”

“OK. I’ll be ready.”

The elevator doors opened and the 2 of you stepped out. Buchanan was smiling at you as made your way to your apartment. Not only did you think it was a good idea, but you also wanted to go. How did he end up with such a beautiful, kind hearted, understanding woman like you?

You opened the door and felt a tug as you tried to walk in. You looked back him with furrowed eyebrows.

“What’s wrong?” you asked.

He was still smiling at you. “Nothing. You’re just amazing. That’s all.” He pulled you into a kiss.

You looked into his eyes when he broke away and rested his forehead on yours. “You’re nothing short of amazing yourself, Sergeant. Now, come on. The Animaniacs are starting soon.”

Y/N and Buchanan sitting on the couch watching the Animaniacs: Buchanan watching Y/N more than the show. Y/N: Why do you keep looking at me like that? Buchanan with a lopsided smile: Just tryin' to figure out how I ended up with a great dame like you. Y/N raising her eyebrows: Did you just call me a bitch? Buchanan startled: What!? NO!! Y/N laughing hysterically: Your face is great right now. Buchanan shaking his head confused: Why would you even say that? Y/N: Great dame. Great Dane. Very easy to mishear and confuse. Buchanan rolling his eyes: You're the worst. Y/N giggling: I thought I was a great dame? Buchanan shaking his head and pulling Y/N onto his lap: Yes, you are while simultaneously being the worst. Y/N grabbing his face: Yeah, sounds like me. Make out session.

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[oddsnendsfanfics]

We All Need Something to Hold On To

Genre: Fan Fiction (The Last Kingdom) Pairing: N/A Warnings: Character Death Rating: G Length: Short Story Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.  

A/N: I had an idea for some sad Uhtred, so...

Men were often proud creatures, going to great lengths to never allow that pride to waiver. To never show their true emotions, no matter what the circumstance.

Sibbe knew many men who fit that exact description, they were often the type one would describe as a man's man. Or a tough guy. She had known and dated several of those exact men.

Uhtred was no different, from the outside, always proud and arrogant. Nobody knew how sweet and kind he truly was, until he'd met her. She had taken the hot headed jerk and somehow tamed him. Hell, she'd even turned him into the perfect husband and doting father.

Gisela had done the impossible - Sibbe was sure of it.

She had known Uhtred since they were kids, he had always been like a brother, despite Sibbe having three already. They had met when Uhtred had moved to the neighbourhood and quickly befriended her twin brother, Sihtric. It wasn't until he had met Gisela that he started to become somebody else. Somebody far more enjoyable than he had ever been before. Gisela had given him a purpose. She was his shining light.

Who would have thought that the proud, soft, and doting Uhtred could ever be reduced to such a state. Sibbe had been out of town for work, when the news had reached her. Sihtric had called her, telling her that she had to come home, immediately.

There had been an accident, was all Sihtric had told his twin sister, an accident involving Gisela and a drunk woman. He didn't have to say the rest for Sibbe to know what he was telling her.

Four days ago they had gathered to pay their respects, to tell Uhtred and his children how sorry they were, while they watched their beloved Gisela be laid to rest. Sibbe had blocked out most of that afternoon, remembering sparse details - the sun was shining, unfitting to the mood surrounding the group. She had stood with Osferth and Hild, holding hands as if they were to let go, they would crumble. Sihtric never left Uhtred's side, keeping guard over his friend as Uhtred had done for Sihtric so many times.

As dusk fell, Finan and Brida lit a pyre, a nod to Gisela's own background. The fire roared and flickered, the orange glow illuminating the small group around it. Uhtred didn't stay to finish watching the fires burn. He left, disappearing into his room, where he remained.

Day three, people were still coming and going from the house. The visitors were now reduced to immediate family and close friends. Bringing their respects and more casseroles. If Uhtred's sister, Thyra, had to find room for another potato mash, she was going to scream.

As the hours grew late and the outside darker, the decisions of the day were made. Thyra and her husband, Beocca were taking Uhtred and Gisela's three children home with them. Hild would come round tomorrow to check on Uhtred, and Sibbe would linger behind in case he needed anything in the mean time.

"I'm going. Call me, if you need anything." Sihtric kissed his sister's cheek, embracing her in a tight hug. "Finan and I are going for a drink."

"Thank you. Be safe." Sibbe kissed her brother's cheek and hugged his dark haired friend.

"Don't be too hard on him, aye." Finan hugged her tight.

"I won't." Sibbe replied, holding onto Finan a little longer. "And you, don't let my brother get too drunk, he has to work in the morning."

With Sihtric and Finan gone that was the last two bodies out of the house, save for Sibbe and Uhtred. The house grew quiet. Uhtred in his room, making hardly a noise. Sibbe's heart ached for her friend, as strong as Uhtred was, nothing could have shaken him more.

Quietly moving around the kitchen, Sibbe had a plan. If she could get Uhtred to eat and perhaps shower, she could get him into bed for some proper rest. Nobody had saw him since the burial. His brother, Ragnar, had knocked on the door several times yesterday to get an angry yell from the other side.

Sibbe wasn't Ragnar and she didn't care what lewdness Uhtred yelled at her; she was going to march into that room and...her shoulders sank, what was she going to do? She couldn't very well hold him down and force feed him. Nor could she drag him out of the room, Uhtred was taller and stronger than she.

Despite her sudden dismay, Sibbe continued to fix something to eat. Two sandwiches, crafted from a roast that somebody had brought, and a bottle of Jura that she'd found in the cupboard Sibbe set off on her mission.

Upstairs was silent, the rooms dark. At the end of the hall the door was closed and a faint hint of light crept from underneath. Bravely she bumped the door with her elbow to knock.

Nothing.

Plate in one hand, she tucked the bottle under her arm and jiggled the door handle. Unlocked. Contrary to belief, Uhtred hadn't locked himself in, he'd hid away instead.

"Uhtred?" Sibbe leaned against the door of the dimly lit bedroom.

"Go, I don't want to be bothered." He waved his hand in the air, back to, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I want to, but you know that I can't."

"Please, leave. I don't want to see anybody."

"You've been in here for three days. Do you not want to come out? Not even for a little while?"  If he was leaving the room, then it was after everybody had gone and the house was left with nothing but haunting memories.

"No."

"Thyra took the kids home, they're going to stay with her and Beocca for a while." This was news that Uhtred should know.

"They should be here, with their mother." Was that a sob?

"Uhtred,"

"Go!"

"I'm not leaving you alone. I won't be in the way, but I won't leave either."

"I don't want to be bothered, Sibbe." Uhtred raised his tone. "Now go! Leave me be."

Sighing heavily, Sibbe refused to listen. Marching across the room, she stopped at the foot of the bed. Plate out stretched, she directed to it with her eyes. Uhtred's blue eyes red rimmed and dull, he glared at her.

Sibbe's intentions were pure and Uhtred knew that. Sibbe had to be one of the most kindhearted people that he knew, outside of his Gisela. Any other circumstance and Uhtred would welcome the short dark haired woman with open arms and lively conversation.

Not today.

"Go home." He muttered in a disgruntled way.

"No."

"This is my house. I will not be..." "Stop it! Stop it!" Sibbe cut him off, stomping her foot.

Silence hit the walls and ricocheted around the pair. Uhtred slumped off the bed, sinking to the hardwood floor below. Who did Sibbe think she was? Marching in here, into his home - his room - and dictating to him. Nostrils flared, he sat on the floor stewing.

"Uhtred," Sibbe knelt down beside the shell of a man on the floor. "I'm...sorry to yell at you."

"What do you want?" He continued to glare at her with hard eyes. Snatching the bottle from her, there was no time wasted in twisting the cap and allowing the liquor to flow from it's confines.

Three days and the only time Uhtred left the room was to grab a bottle of tequila from the cupboard downstairs. He'd waited until everyone was in bed, although he had a suspicion that Thyra had heard him creep past Stiorra's bedroom where Thyra had been spending the nights.

He'd sat alone on the floor, in a similar manner to how he was now, the bottle keeping him company while the tears burned his face and the memories and anger tore his heart. Gisela would hate him in this state.

"You to eat." Sibbe held out the plate of sandwiches.

"Why?" He whispered, his lips poised to the bottle.

"Why what?" Sibbe sat back on her haunches. "I want you to eat, because I doubt you've eaten in days."

"Not that." Uhtred rolled his eyes.

"Then why what? I'm not a mind reader." Sibbe shifted to sit beside him.

Out of all her gifts and talents reading minds, other than Sihtric's, wasn't something she could do.

"Gisela did nothing wrong. Why her?"

The question was one that Uhtred had pondered since he had gotten the call, there had been an accident. He was getting Oswald from school, when the phone rang. A man on the other end identified himself as a police officer, immediately Uhtred's blood ran cold and his heart began to race.

After that it had all gone black.

Somehow he had managed to get home, safe at that, and call for somebody to watch the kids. Brida had stayed with the children, while Ragnar had drove him downtown.

The woman who had asked him to identify the body had been polite and sympathetic, telling Uhtred that she understood if he would need a moment or two alone. She'd led him down a hall, Ragnar by his side, and into a room. After that Uhtred had done everything he could to block the memory. It was the worst moment he'd endured.

"I - I don't know."

"And the kids. What now?"

Coming home after having to identify his wife, all of it had made Uhtred sick. How was he to walk into the house and tell his children? They were waiting for their mother to come home, none the wiser.

They'd attended the funeral and the wake, yet Uhtred felt they weren't fully grasping the concept. Oswald perhaps, but the other two were far too young for this.

They were three innocent little lives, left without their mother. Children needed their mother.

"How am I to face them now?" Uhtred tipped the bottle up, his eyes red and glossy. "They're going to ask for her and then what? What do I say? What do I do?"

Sibbe wished she had all the answers. Answers to give Uhtred and the children, when they asked later. How did you explain to a toddler that his mother would never come back? Or to a little girl that the woman she worshiped had been unfairly taken away?

"The good thing is that you're not alone. You have friends and family to help you through this." Sibbe held her hand out, asking for the bottle. "We'll make it work, Uhtred."

"Will we?"

The whiskey burned and warmed Sibbe's insides, caressing her like a warm hug on the way down. The burning reminded her of the pyre lit only a few evenings ago. Burning and dancing for those who were there. Licking her lips she let the bottle rest between her and Uhtred on the floor.

"I think so." Sibbe had no real way of knowing, of course. Some how Uhtred and his children would push through. They would manage, despite the tears along the way, one day they would wake up and be on the other side of all this.

"Ironic." Uhtred glanced at the bottle between them. "It was probably a similar bottle that took my wife. Yet, here I am, drowning that very memory."

"That woman..." Sibbe had nothing else to say.

The woman they'd found out thanks to Uhtred's boss, Alfred, and his connections to the local enforcement, was a young woman who had been going through some rough times herself. Sibbe couldn't blame her for wanting to drink away the pain and strife, although she'd never forgive her for getting into a car.

"Skade, her name is Skade." Uhtred snarled. "I found out that she'll have a trial, but I don't think I can go."

"If you have to, then I'll go with you. We'll talk to your lawyers, but maybe they won't need you there. Whatever the outcome, I'm going to be right beside you. Sihtric will be, too."

"My wife is gone and they probably won't even give her a fine." Uhtred snarled. "You know, she didn't even stay to see if Gisela was okay. She just...left."

Sibbe had heard those details as well, Alfred had came over the morning of the funeral to deliver the news to Uhtred. Sibbe had heard when Beocca told Sihtric and Finan later that afternoon.

"Did you know she sent flowers? That damn witch sent flowers to my family, after she cursed us." Uhtred clenched his fists, a rage building.

Flowers were hardly a sign of malicious intent, some would even view them as a means to make amends. Uhtred had immediately ordered them to the trash, he wanted nothing to do with this woman or her hollow apologies. If she sat behind bars for the rest of her life, so be it, because he was the one who had truly lost.

"I didn't know." Sibbe replied quietly, reaching for the bottle.

Uhtred's nod was sluggish.

Silence befell the pair once more. Sibbe sat cross legged, her attention shifting from Uhtred to the bottle in her hand. She wanted nothing more than to go back and fix all of this.

If she could bring Gisela back...

Until Science allowed such things, all she could do was comfort her hurting friend.

A plate of sandwiches on the floor beside him; Uhtred was reluctant to pick up half of one. Staring at it as if food was a concept he had yet to master. Instead of taking a bite, he spoke.

"What made you decide to stay?"

Everyone else was gone, he had heard them leave not long before Sibbe had come to seek him out. Aside from Ragnar, nobody dared try and disturb Uhtred since he retreated. Sibbe had taken her time, Uhtred had half expected to see her face before now. He needed space and she had respected that. Despite her worry about his well being.

"You have always been there for Sihtric and I. Now, it's my turn to be there for you." Sibbe passed him the bottle.

"You don't have to do this. I'm happy to be left alone." Uhtred accepted the bottle, the dark amber liquid tasted as bitter as his soul had turned.

"Nobody should be left alone in a time like this." Sibbe shrugged, leaning against the side of the bed. "You're hurting and it does nobody any good to be left with their thoughts."

"When did you become the expert on grief?" Uhtred scoffed. The bottle clutched in his hand, at least she had brought him a decent whiskey. Sibbe stiffened and sniffed hard; Uhtred's shoulders sinking. "Sibbe..."

When Sibbe and Sihtric were thirteen, their mother had passed away, leaving them in the care of their father. To this day, Sihtric would angrily tell anybody who would listen that his life had ended on that very day. Somehow it was Sihtric who had became the new punching bag, after his mother's passing. A theory, held by Uhtred's adoptive father Ragnar, Sr. was that Kjartan had murdered his wife. Somewhere in his theory, Sihtric had known more than his father had wanted him to. Sibbe, terrified to explore the theory had convinced herself that her mother's death was an accident, nothing more.

Uhtred had always been their protector from that day on.

"Sometimes death leaves you with a funny mix of emotions. My world was wrecked, when we lost my mother." Sibbe sat stiff as a board. "And then, when my father died..." her voice trailed off. "It was the greatest relief I have ever felt. Not for me, but for Sihtric."

Two years ago, when Kjartan has passed, Gisela had gone round to Sihtric's apartment every day to check in on him. Drunk for a week, Sihtric as happy as he was still had a lot of grief to process. Gisela had sat with him for hours, allowing him to pour it all out. She would make his meals, invite him over to the house to be around his friends, and even did his laundry and cleaned his house. When she wasn't helping Sihtric deal with purging the toxic memories from his life, she was with Sibbe trying to help her in any way she could.

They were important to Uhtred and as his wife, she wanted them to be cared for, after all they were nothing less than family.

Now it was Sibbe's turn to repay the kindness that Gisela had shown them over the years.

Uhtred took a bite from the sandwich, chasing it with the whiskey. Sibbe's hope perked.

"I've lost people before, but this..." Uhtred mumbled around a mouthful of food. Swallowing, he paused to collect his thoughts.

Sibbe had known about his father, passing when Uhtred was very young. It's how he ended up with Ragnar, Sr. and Sigrid. And then there was his first son, from another marriage.

Nobody talked about Uhtred and Mildrith's marriage or their son, it was a subject that was raw among those who had been privy to the life and times. Gisela had known and Sibbe was certain that was the last time Uhtred had spoke of his ex-wife.

"She won't be alone, you know." Sibbe sat staring at the framed photo of Uhtred and Gisela on the night stand.

"What?"

"Gisela, she won't be alone. My mom will take care of her for you." Sibbe knew that Uhtred's idea of the afterlife and hers were different in many ways. His sideways glance said more about his feelings of her statement than words ever could. His personal beliefs and feelings didn't deter her from her thoughts. "And now Mildrith won't have to worry."

"Sibbe." Uhtred was tired of her nonsense already. He was in no mood to hear her preach, nor was he in the mood to listen to her talk about Mildrith or their son.

"What? Do you not believe they have gone somewhere good? Somewhere beautiful and bright? Two kind and good women, along with an innocent child. Surely you believe that they are deserving of somewhere peaceful to rest." Sibbe frowned, tipping the bottle. The alcohol seemed to help her courage to keep voicing her thoughts out loud. "Believe what you want, Uhtred, but I know that they have made it somewhere divine."

"You should lay off of the fairy tales."

Sibbe had a fierce belief in all things good and heaven was one of them. The tragedy of losing her mother had dictated that she needed to believe in such a place. Sihtric and Uhtred had teased her about her faith, never the less it didn't stop Sibbe.

"My heaven is no different than what you believe. No matter where they went, I know that they are together and they'll take care of one another. My mother and your son will welcome Gisela and..." a sob choked Sibbe's words.

"My dear, sweet, Sibbe." Uhtred moved closer, his arm around her shoulder, drawing her to his chest. "You may also need to lay off of the drinking."

Face turned, agitated and perhaps a little tipsy, Sibbe sniffled her voice muffled in Uhtred's shoulder. "Don't mock me."

Stroking her hair, a crack of a smirk had graced Uhtred's lips. Since he had received the news, he had felt it would be impossible to ever smile again. "I'm not mocking you. But I thought you were here to comfort me."

Pulling back, Sibbe rubbed her cheeks, drying the tears. "I am, but...we all tell ourselves things to make it hurt a little less."

Uhtred wished he could make this hurt less.

Not only for himself, but his children as well. They were his sole responsibility, some father he was. Hiding away like a coward, while his sister took on the role of parent.

Sniffling beside him, Sibbe rested her head on his shoulder. Headstrong and sweet, always putting others ahead of herself. Uhtred admired her for that. He hadn't known it at the time, when she'd barged in demanding he eat, but talking and allowing his emotions to be freed had been a small portion of weight lifted.

"Sibbe." Uhtred's voice was hushed. "Thank you."

Always the one taking care of Sihtric and Sibbe, it was different being the one to rely on them. Uhtred meant it. They hadn't given it any thought, rushing to his aid with whatever he needed.

Sibbe squeezed his hand. "If there's anything else, you can always ask. It doesn't hurt to let your pride slip and ask."

"My dear, sweet Sibbe." Uhtred rubbed her shoulder.  "Always the wise one."

"Yes, and as the wise one, I want you to get in bed. Have a proper sleep, and tomorrow, start new. It's going to take time and I know it will never bring..."

"Sibbe." Uhtred held a finger to his lips, indicating her to to shush. Sibbe blinked in confusion. "I will do as you say, if you stop with the lectures and lay with me?"

Sibbe must have looked like a deer in the headlights, at the very least she felt like one. What had she been asked to do? No. No she couldn't.  How could he even think to ask her such a thing? Was Uhtred looking for a punch? Or was he that grief stricken that he didn't know what he was asking?

No. Sibbe would refuse.

"Uhtred," her voice was shaking. "What you're asking me to do, it's...I. We shouldn't."

Uhtred had picked up on her internal conflict, his hand finding hers once more.

"I haven't been sleeping, because the bed is too empty. I have tried, but I can't bear it. I miss Gisela next to me. What I am asking is just that, to lie with me until I am asleep. You can move to another room or even go home, once I am sleeping. I only ask for a little comfort."

Sibbe's mouth moved, as if trying to form words. Comfort? She had watched enough romantic comedies to know that this was always how it began. Well, not her. No way. Frowning, Sibbe worked on the best way to turn him down.

"If you don't want to, I understand. It was kind of a dumb thing to ask, anyway. Forgive me?"

"You're forgiven," Sibbe whispered. Against her better judgment, she gave in. "And I will, but only until you are asleep and then I am moving to another room. I don't want any wrong impressions, nor do I want..."

"Sibbe. You really should stop over thinking everything." Uhtred pushed himself from the floor, standing over Sibbe, his hand extended. "I am exhausted and need to sleep that's all."

"O-okay." Sibbe stood on shaking legs. "I'll um, I'll..." she sat on the edge of the bed. "Let me know when you're ready for bed, then?"

Uhtred kissed her cheek and demanded she wait for him, before he slept a shower and change of clothes was in order. He'd been wearing the same thing since he'd retired to his room after the funeral. A hot shower and a woman's presence would surely help him sleep.

Some minutes later, feeling as though it had been an eternity, Sibbe laid in bed facing Uhtred. The black circles under his eyes more visible now she was closer to him. He was a picture of exhaustion and her heart was aching all over again. Without thought, she'd brought her hand to stroke his damp hair. Her fingers running over his scalp and her body warm next to his.

If he closed his eyes really tight and blocked out everything from the last week, Uhtred could take himself back to the evening before...before he...a sharp sniffle was the only indication to Sibbe that he was thinking of his wife. Her fingers were gentle and her touch soft, she was almost the same height as Gisela, fitting in place beside him. Sibbe held her breath under his touch, when he slid his arms around her to hold her closer. Her shape and size, even her smell, could be manipulated if Uhtred closed his eyes and wished hard enough. Sibbe listened to his heart racing, her own heart quickly matching the rhythm.

In his mind he could convince himself that it was his wife in bed with him. In his heart, he knew that that nobody would ever come close to his Gisela.  

(I never know who to tag for these, so I have been going with the list from the Let’s Be Danes challenges. If you don’t want to be (or aren’t tagged and want to be), please feel free to tell me :D)

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